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LifeChoiceReflector Archive

View 7 posts and 217 comments by LifeChoiceReflector on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

Thanks for that link. I'll take a look.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/05/16 01:53 PM
3

This was my comment, btw. Didn't see that I was logged into some throwaway account. Clarifying it here because people can look into my history to get some context and to see how great /u/whinemoreplease had been.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/05/16 01:29 PM
1

Thank you. I didn't see it that way. I agree that my lack of testosterone is a big problem.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/04/16 08:48 PM
1

I'd honestly appreciate if you could tear it down and tell me what makes me look like a sissy. The only thing I know is that if I have to do something then I should do it instead of bitching about why I didn't do it, but again, please let me know your thoughts. Thanks.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/04/16 03:21 PM
1

I don't know. I say this is what I'm going to do, and I follow through for a few days and then just stop doing it one day. I want to go out to gym but end up just being a couch potato. At this point I'm even sick of making promises and plans. Let me try this. I'm only going to plan for this one day and see if I can get it done. I'm going to go to the gym today. Continue the 5x5 from where I left off. I'm going to cook a dinner tonight. I'm going to finish implementing basic Postgres connector at…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/04/16 02:25 PM
1

I totally agree with you. Lifting is something I should have had complete control over. I'm living alone while my wife and daughter are in India recovering from the delivery. Every day I want to go to gym, but as soon as I enter my house after work, it is as if I'm sucked into a black hole. I just sit there doing worthless things while at the same time hating myself for it. This is exactly the reason why I hardly ever post in mrp these days. You can read through my post history to see how bad I …
/r/MarriedRedPill05/04/16 01:17 PM
3

I've been doing a pretty good job of not being unattractive, but a very poor job of being attractive. I've also been doing a good job of being stoic and swatting shit tests, but my lack of discipline in lifting and getting back to shape disgusts me.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/04/16 11:38 AM
1

The thing about India is, there are so many different cultures that you cannot possibly define one set of rules or realities that fits the whole country. For example, my father is a career beta, but with no bucks. He is (at least was) a charming guy who flirted with waitresses when we went to dinner as a family. He had a kind of emotional relationship with his 20 years younger colleague, and hid gifts from her which we found out and had an intervention(kind of) for. My mother singlehandedly supp…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/01/16 12:46 PM
6

/u/whinemoreplease is the bluntest son of a bitch here. That said, If you think he's bullying you, then you haven't realized the true problems in your marriage yet. I don't know your story, but looks like you're still in denial. I was there once, and this bastard slapped me right across my face. It really pissed me off at the time, but I later realized that he was right, and that changed my life.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/01/16 06:58 AM
3

Not really validation seeking. When you keep seeing the same person come with the same kind of posts, always posting his problems, you gradually lose interest, and brush him off as lost cause. The person loses valuable advice because he's not going to get better, and it's a waste of your time. This is my way of saying thank you, and that the time you take to help me out is not wasted. Other newcomers can also benefit from my successes.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/01/16 06:49 AM
2

The core of RP advice actually stays same for any culture. If you're not the best captain you could be, you can expect your first mate to either run your ship to ground, or take charge and treat you like a dog while resenting you. As /u/marxistbacon told me, the way you were brought up is simply your journey till here and now. How you go forward is up to you. The difference being an Indian/south Indian is that people give you a lot more shit when you want to exit out of your marriage. It's up to…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/01/16 04:47 AM
3

That's a religion. The language was Tamil.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/01/16 02:03 AM
2

This was over the phone. I should have been more clear.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/01/16 01:37 AM
3

It seems a bit overt in translation, but when I said it, I delivered it with obvious exaggeration. It was not a sincere monologue. More like a playful banter. I never call my wife honey or its equivalent. It sounds cheesy to me. I use such words only when I'm being funny.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/01/16 08:55 PM
1

Thanks for the insightful response and the detailed analysis. That was an enlightening read. My father has always had a huge weakness for sex. Early in my childhood, I remember him making lewd remarks about women on TV, and I remember finding his stash of porn magazines. I discovered masturbation on my own and very early in my life; as early as a year before even my puberty. I was a very secretive boy on these matters, so I never talked about these things to anybody. Until 12th grade, I believed…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/01/16 12:52 PM
1

Helicopter parenting is one thing I'm wary of. She is the type of person who over analyses every single thing and who gets scared for every little symptom. If left unchecked, she could very easily turn my daughter into the same paranoid person she is. I am equipping myself with parenting strategies to avoid this.
/r/askMRP20/01/16 09:13 PM
1

You're probably true about my perception of the burden. I'm with my wife because I want to be with my wife. I'm with my daughter because I want to be with my daughter. I hope I can say this a short way down the road. To be honest, when my wife is not the entitled bitch she is sometimes, I like being with her. In hindsight, I should never have been in a relationship with her, let alone marry her and have a child with her. However, given the short period of our marriage, and from previous MRP expe…
/r/askMRP20/01/16 05:31 AM
1

The only reason I'm not taking a paternity test is that I know my wife to be an ultra conservative woman. And we had a huge fight this past month when I was in India for my daughter's birth. I am totally ready for a divorce, but I have a newborn daughter now. There's no escaping that. I have seen what happens when I improve myself. Things go on a downward spiral when I go on a downward spiral. I don't have any illusions about my wife. I only know that I was good once, and I saw results during th…
/r/askMRP20/01/16 04:53 AM
1

Thanks for the advice. I started WISNIFG a while ago but didn't complete it. I'll continue with the book.
/r/askMRP20/01/16 03:43 AM
2

That's an interesting point of view. Thanks for that perspective.
/r/askMRP20/01/16 03:42 AM
2

Thanks for the advice. I ultimately do that, but its just really uncomfortable for me to agree to her, as it felt like I was losing my freedom. After reading the comments here, I think I should stop giving so much value to the promises I make in situations like this.
/r/askMRP20/01/16 03:27 AM
1

My wife is ultra conservative, and has not masturbated until now. A few times over the three years, while I was at work, she used to call me and say that she wanted me inside her or that she wanted to finger the pussy. Over the past three years, it would never work if I tell her in advance that I wanted to have sex that night. She wanted it to happen spontaneously. Some days, I would be nervous because I had never had sex before, so my hands would become chilly, which is an instant turn off for …
/r/MarriedRedPill20/01/16 03:23 AM
1

Oh I completely agree. In fact, I found MRP only when I was alone for a few months in 2014. I'm a 100% sure that if I didn't have that alone time, I would never have taken the pill. However, when I start living alone, for the first weeks (sometimes months), I go on a downward spiral until I hit rockbottom and get back up again.
/r/askMRP20/01/16 02:30 AM
1

That's the thing. As I said in my post, as it is, I only rarely show any pictures to anybody, and never without request. It is extremely easy for me to comply to the request, because I'm already doing that. My issue is actually agreeing to her. By agreeing, it feels like I'm losing my freedom to show the picture to whoever the hell I want, as long as I know what I'm doing.
/r/askMRP20/01/16 02:26 AM
3

It has been a good while since I posted, so I'm not sure if I'm the person you have in mind. I have regretfully deleted my very initial posts, but there are still a lot of cringeworthy posts I'm preserving, so I would suggest you take a look at them to get an idea about me.
/r/askMRP20/01/16 02:24 AM
2

Thanks for the response. I know I've mentally grown a lot, but some days I feel I have completely let go and like I am back at the beginning (I've posted my latest update in the OYS thread). I really wish I hadn't deleted my very initial posts. Regarding her beliefs, those are not religious. They are more cultural. Even I have sometimes said 'probably we flaunted it and somebody jinxed it'. I don't know the exact phrase in English. To me, when I promise/agree to something, it is bad to not follo…
/r/askMRP20/01/16 02:22 AM
1

Long time since I posted in the OYS thread. I have been mostly living a pathetic life the past 6 months. Somehow, living alone makes me just lose momentum completely and makes me let go. It has been months since I hit the gym. I am fatter by 10 pounds. I had some pretty big big fights over the past few months. My daughter was born two months ago. My wife and daughter are in India until they are fit to travel, and I am back in the US. I have been really ashamed to show my face at MRP, so I stoppe…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/01/16 02:02 AM
2

Yeah it's me again. I have a terrible problem of staying productive. After a while I just stopped doing stuff to improve myself. Particularly when there is nobody around. It has been a long long time since I hit the gym. I have realized that I get kind of depressed when I live completely alone (I have been living mostly alone since August/September). I stopped visiting MRP because I was/am so ashamed of myself. I'm beginning to pick myself up. I have 4 more months while I will be living alone. I…
/r/askMRP20/01/16 01:15 AM
1

Could you elaborate a little bit? Should I have said I don't believe in such things and said I will show pictures to whomever whenever because I know what I'm doing?
/r/askMRP20/01/16 12:40 AM
1

Problem is, I was the definition of beta when we first dated, and followed all her advices even when I didn't like them. Now I finally have the guts to tell her I don't need her advices, but she thinks that I used her when I needed her, and now that I'm in a good position, I'm getting arrogant and don't need her advices anymore.
/r/askMRP23/09/15 03:16 PM
1

The thought to divorce has been crossing more and more in my mind and it feels like an inevitable thing these days. And I would definitely have acted upon it too, if not for her getting pregnant with my daughter. I'm going to be a dad in a couple of months, and it's extra difficult to divorce her for the next few years at least. Her sister is not way hotter than my wife, but has a completely different attitude about marriage and respecting the husband. Sometimes she even seems RP in her views.
/r/askMRP22/09/15 09:08 PM
1

Good points. Thanks for the advice. I've learned to STFU more and more these days, and I've found that whenever she's on an advice spree, the best thing that ends it is to just say 'Sure' and go my way. My reasoning is that she gives me an advice and I'm hearing it, doesn't mean that I should follow it. However, I'm also wondering if responding in affirmative to her advices is a bad move and motivates her to advise me more, and makes me accountable for the advices. I was previously very consciou…
/r/askMRP22/09/15 08:57 PM
1

A&A did not backfire, it ended the topic Sadly, I lost it when she responded the way she did, so was stupid enough to explain myself to her. I didn't want her to feel like I agreed to her, because that is what she seemed to think. It extended for a while after that, with me feeling frustrated in the end.
/r/askMRP22/09/15 08:50 PM
1

You're in a spot where the phone can always be hung up. Sadly, I'm not. I'm earning more, yes. However, I let my SMV really slide these past three months, and have only very recently have started building it back. My wife currently has no respect to me as a Captain. Added to that, her little sister just revealed that she's in a relationship with a guy who runs his own company and earns tons more than me. She keeps telling me how skilled that guy is, and how her sister tells her he treats her lik…
/r/askMRP22/09/15 08:47 PM
2

She had technical jobs in the past, but was only really good in management type jobs. She has this attitude that she has seen others jump from one technology to another, so it's not a big deal. Her mentality is that I should like her for what she is, but I should meet and exceed her expectations of a great husband and a brilliant guy. I should take good care of her, but she wouldn't treat me like a Captain because we are equal, and she'll also take care of me like a child (her words). It doesn't…
/r/askMRP22/09/15 08:15 PM
1

Actually, I just want her to shut up. When she told me to prepare myself for the next job and learn the skills necessary for the next job rather than get complacent in this job because they treat me well, I said, "No. I came to this company convincing them that I'm a good Data Engineer. So I'm going to learn all the skills necessary to become the best Data Engineer. Not to get ready for the next job, but to prove my worth to this company and to myself." To this she replied, "You're absolutely co…
/r/askMRP22/09/15 07:43 PM
1

Oh I did try A&A. How it backfired! I said, "Sure honey! Who cares about job satisfaction? All I care about is for the money, so I've already started preparing for the next job!" To this she replied, "Good. That's the kind of response I expect from you. If you simply say 'hmm', I feel like you don't understand/agree with me and are just cutting me off'.
/r/askMRP22/09/15 06:50 PM
1

Well, the redpill truth is nobody cares about you except yourself. It does not mean that you don't care about anybody else. It says you do what you should do without expectations of what you'd get. The responses here sound blue pill because the shitposts are made by Blue pill men. The people defend those posts do not do it because they want to post shitposts. They are not BP anymore. However, they still remember the time they were BP, and know how they posted shit before they started their RP jo…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/15 11:39 AM
1

Thanks man!
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 12:39 PM
15

I understand the intentions behind tightening up the rules to post, but I'm really glad I got in before the rules. God knows how awful my initial posts were. My marriage was so bad (it's still not the best), that people right away told me I'm trolling, and threatened to ban me. Truth is, it took me all those shit posts to get here. Without mrp, I would have ended it long time ago. As a newbie, I've always found worth in every shitpost in this sub. Responses to those posts have always taught me v…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/15 12:07 PM
2

This week I will hit the gym and workout regularly. I will also cut down on junk food and continue with MMSLP. I will also meditate for 5 minutes every day.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/15 12:15 AM
1

I realize that. Indeed I have been eating junk stuff out of control. I'm going to cut short those.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/08/15 03:33 AM
2

It has been a while since I posted. The last I posted was when I landed a new job. It has been a handful of weeks since then. There has been both good and bad since then. Good: I have gotten significantly better in holding frame. These days I rarely lose frame. In the beginning, I was frankly walking on eggshells around my wife, scared of saying anything wrong as it would usually end up in a huge argument ending in me apologizing begrudgingly. However, I am completely (for the most part) relaxed…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/08/15 10:50 PM
-1

I have two accounts as well, and I rarely, almost never, browse MRP while at home. I have an open house for all my accounts too (I screwed up a lot during my BP feminist days). I have both accounts configured in my phone (Relay for Reddit in Android). It's a simple thing to switch between accounts. I browse the other account when I'm outside, and use my office laptop when I'm at work. Let me know if you need help with Reddit apps for phone.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/06/15 01:45 PM
2

Thanks for the advice. I'm working on OI. I've also been shutting up more, which helps.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/15 03:15 PM
2

Oh she's pregnant alright. She has a 13 week belly and we saw Mini Me being busy in the ultrasound. I'm positive the child is mine because she had her periods the day after she came back from India, and the baby measurements corroborate with the period date.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/15 03:13 PM
2

Thanks! She usually compares me with her friends and friends' husbands. Usually when she sees some couple showing intimacy, or some guy's facebook status praising his wife, she accuses me of not being a romantic/appreciative/caring of her, and I used to get a lot of butthurt because I felt I'm all that. Now I know she's always going to feel I'm not upto the mark, irrespective of what I do. I know a major part of it is due to me having a lower SMV than her (fat and hair fall). My focus now is to …
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/15 03:11 PM
2

Grabbing frame is worth the risk to them ALWAYS I completely agree and I'm beginning to see the frame-grab efforts more and more clearly now. Thanks for the advice.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/15 03:05 PM
2

Thanks for the kind words! I know she's already eying my next promotion, and she expressly said so. Isn't that normal AWALT behavior? How do I react to it?
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/15 03:03 PM
2

Thanks. The thing I'm most glad about is the shift from COBOL to Big Data. I would have been happy even if I got a big data job for a lot less than $100k. I'm finally confident about my future.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/15 02:58 PM
2

Thank you!
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/15 02:57 PM
2

Thanks for the Shiva example. I read that during the initial days and it was a revelation. I know I still have a long way to go, but becoming Shiva is my North Star.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/15 02:55 PM
2

I agree that I should hangout with guys more. I have only recently started socializing with guys at work, and that helped tremendously in landing this job in many ways. Before meeting her, I had a multitude of friends and acquaintances, but I got too fixated upon her and lost contact with almost every single guy I knew. Only after taking RP do I realize the importance of having guy friends.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/15 02:53 PM
3

I'm the nicest guy ever to post here. Can confirm. You gave me the nicest slap on my ear during my initial days. I was really butthurt at the time to you calling me out, but it actually pushed me to realize my mistakes and take positive steps.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/15 02:51 PM
2

Thanks for the kind words. There was a time when I couldn't stand her any longer, but like the 'When to next your wife' post says, it has passed, and I now I can see her getting better and better (meaning I'm getting better at handling her and doing shit). Today, she sat on my lap, and was telling me that she only said that to me. To everybody else (her and my family), she has been praising a lot about my move. That she didn't talk to me that way because I wouldn't look at the other side (of it …
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/15 02:47 PM
2

Thanks for the insight. What would be a 'Shiva' response to the above situation? As per my understanding right now, my in-frame response after her "That's nice" should be smile, and change topic, but I may be wrong. If I start explaining why it's more than nice, then I'm not in frame. If I leave the place without some normal conversation, I seem butthurt. Please advice.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/15 02:30 PM
2

She couldn't get work visa here. Also, I was a feminist pos back then, and told her I don't want her to work. I said I'd take care of her.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/05/15 03:28 PM
2

Thanks man!
/r/MarriedRedPill28/05/15 02:52 PM
4

I guess I should have. Thanks for the advice.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/05/15 02:51 PM
2

She doesn't work (quit her job for the marriage).
/r/MarriedRedPill28/05/15 02:43 PM
2

It's not my wife not giving me validations. It's her keeping on explaining to me her reasoning and expecting me to agree with her. What should have been my move? Should I have agreed with her, or should I have told her I wouldn't discuss about this, which makes me seem butthurt?
/r/MarriedRedPill28/05/15 02:36 PM
1

It's not me seeking her approval. It's her seeking my approval for her reasoning behind why she thinks this is nothing to be happy about. And she wouldn't shut up about it until I agree with her saying yes this is not something to be happy about. However, I am happy about it, because I know how big of a leap this is personally for me. She wouldn't let me feel the happiness because this is nothing to be happy about.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/05/15 02:26 PM
1

What you said is exactly what I had been doing before this post. However, people have advised me to stop asking her about her health, and I see their point as well. I'm glad you commented on the lines of my thought. I would like to see others discuss on your comment.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/05/15 08:39 PM
2

I don't know if it counts as a vampire thing, but my favorite pastime with her is to creep her out. When I come home from work, I always enter noiselessly and creep up behind her, waiting for her to turn around and get shocked. The immediate reaction to that shock is her coming in my arms and punching me in the chest while I take her in a bear hug and kiss her. She likes it a lot as well, and many days, she herself hides in some place when she hears me coming home, reversing my creep. It's our l…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 06:17 PM
1

I don't think I've yet reached that level in my marriage yet. If I tell her to behave in a particular way, it could blow up in my face. I'm slowly inching towards that though.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 06:07 PM
0

I think of it like a captain taking a status call of his FO to ensure optimum running conditions. Is this a wrong perspective? Whenever I ask her how she's feeling, I don't ask with any concern in my voice. I just ask as a matter of fact, and try to react with just enough empathy without jumping in with solutions.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 06:06 PM
1

It's not something she does only during pregnancy. She has been doing this all through the relationship. But it's still a good point, and I'll take that into account before considering them fitness tests. Thanks.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 06:03 PM
2

I see what you mean. I've realized the less I speak, the better it works out. I also slipped today trying to give her explanation for my actions (I thought you were sleeping). Instead, I should have just stuck to my frame (an amused "No reason" with a smirk would have worked fine and prevented her from validating/arguing my explanations). You're right that I should work on building my frame stronger.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/15 02:46 PM
5

She wasn't behaving poorly other than doing AWALT stuff. It's on me that I didn't tell her not to wake me up and I didn't tell her to do the dishes on her own. I think I got a little soft because she has been behaving extremely well over the week and I lost my frame there. I have mailed the company explaining my situation and have told them that I'll be submitting the project 2 days from now, and they have agreed. I do have some scarcity mentality for my job, and that's primarily due to the fact…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/05/15 09:12 PM
5

I had a great interview opportunity lined up that would pay 40% more, but I'm afraid I'm losing it. As part of the interview process, I was given a kind of mini project to do and present the results to them. I told them I would finish it over the weekend, but I got sick during the weekend and I'm nowhere near finishing it yet. They haven't closed the doors yet, but I'm dreading the company's reaction when I finally finish it. Also, I haven't been lifting since this Monday owing to my health, and…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/05/15 07:01 PM
2

Thanks. I'd say outcome independence was one of the key things that started turning things around. I stopped giving a shit what she said and started doing what I wanted to do. I honestly thought she was going to flip her shit. It was the opposite. For the first time in my relationship with her, I'm not scared to talk to her or to even be around her.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/05/15 04:27 PM
10

I know exactly what you mean, and I even said the same thing a few weeks ago in a post here. For me though, those things have stopped completely, and I'm not a 100% sure what exact act on my part stopped it. I did a number of things: I let her know that I talked to Domestic violence and they advised me that physical restraint like this is illegal and that I should divorce her. The last time when she locked herself and me in our bedroom preventing me from going out, I said that I'm leaving becaus…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/05/15 03:01 PM
1

That guy did almost exactly what I should have done during my wedding. Hindsight is a wonderful tool. At least I (can) have control of what lies ahead.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/04/15 04:22 PM
2

I haven't yet. I'm currently on the verge of landing a new job that would pay 40% more than my current salary, and would have to relocate to a different state. Things seem to be looking up, but I know this is something that never disappears without being dealt with, so I'm planning to tackle this after I get settled in the new place.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/04/15 03:34 PM
1

I'm yet to take any steps about that. I know it's something I must do, but the financial aspect of it is daunting right now.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/04/15 04:29 PM
3

This week has started pretty well. I have made some progress in my marriage in that my wife has started respecting some of my boundaries. She now acknowledges that I go to gym on Monday/Wednesday/Friday, and that I will not sacrifice that for anything, even sex. After my previous post, I went home and there was another big argument that I was watching movie on the bed while she was tossing and turning, and that I didn't even ask her if she can't sleep. There was a huge argument after that, and t…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/04/15 04:13 PM
1

I will stop giving a fuck about what she thinks. Her emotions are not my responsibility. My emotions, reactions, growth, and happiness are my responsibility. I just completed week 3 of Strong lifts 5x5. I'm reading MMSLP and have started resisting fitness tests. I'm also regularly reading all the posts and discussions here. I'm particularly interested in stoicism and would like to read more on that.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/04/15 02:08 AM
1

Thanks for the detailed response. I need to read your comment another 50 times because this is gold. I understand what you're saying, and I realize what I'm doing wrong. I know she is very judgmental, and I keep letting myself get affected by her judgements. I have been getting better, but it's a long way to go. Until I reached MRP, I was scared to even mention to her that I think an actress is hot/looking good. She would immediately berate me for having such a bad taste, in spite of how hot/pre…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 07:31 PM
2

Also, to give some context to sock puppet Indian trolls, a majority of Indian households are matriarchal, and every single news about rape results in a stronger determination by mothers to bring up more BP feminists into the world.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 07:17 PM
2

I totally understand that people might think I'm trolling. I've been told that in my previous posts. If it makes it any better, I've improved a lot since my first post here, and have taken some good steps forward in becoming a better person. After coming here, I've started lifting (5x5), started doing a lot of stuff at home to prevent being idle at home, has had a paradigm shift and stopped putting my wife on a pedestal, stopped expecting any encouragement/appreciation for stuff I do, started be…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 07:12 PM
1

I called domestic violence hotline two weeks ago and had a lengthy discussion. I told her only a week later when she hit me again. She hasn't hit me since. I've talked to her parents about how she's been behaving, and they understand what I'm saying. I'm sending her to India after her first trimester when it's safe to travel given her previous air travel experiences. I'm not taking a paternity test because she had her periods one day after she came back, and I showed me the blood while washing b…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 06:56 PM
2

Thing is, she's not doing anything different because she's pregnant here. This is how a lot of conversations went on even before pregnancy. However, my responses those times (no knowledge of RP) would have been slightly different with the conversation dragging for a lot longer and with me ending up apologizing and feeling shitty.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/04/15 06:38 PM
2

She had her last periods one day after she came back, and we had sex 10 days later. The conception was 3 weeks ago, but pregnancy is calculated from the day of last period, which means she got pregnant the day after she came here.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/04/15 08:00 PM
1

I agree. And I'm at a point where I am ready to divorce her, but the baby is quite a shock to me. She has threatened me that she will make sure to ruin my career and life if I don't be nice to her, she told me today that she'll make sure to feed the baby once it is born all hate about me and tell the baby that I tried to kill it. I know in my heart that this is the end of the line. I'm simply too scared to make my move. Against all my reason, I keep telling her things I know I shouldn't have tol…
/r/MarriedRedPill02/04/15 08:08 PM
2

Sounds like she's actually pregnant. Please see my other post. I need to go home to make sure she isn't lying.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/04/15 07:55 PM
1

I realize I'm hamstering hard. It's a difficult decision to make. I shouldn't be replying to comments in this mode.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/04/15 07:54 PM
-1

I'm not ignoring the advice. For one thing, she is evidently mentally unstable and possibly pregnant, so I'm wary to leave her alone, lest she might do something extreme. Next, I don't even know if she's pregnant for real, so I need to make her take the test again. Third, I will definitely move to a hotel if the same thing happens again, but the best way for me to do this is to send her to India where there can be people looking after her (she should actually be a responsible and level headed ad…
/r/MarriedRedPill02/04/15 07:46 PM
0

I know. I also know that there is a very good chance I will not succeed in doing that, but that is what I'm going to do. The doctor's office said they can have an appointment only on the seventh week, which is two weeks from now. I'll go home and take the test again, but I'm pretty sure she wouldn't oblige, so it's going to be another fight.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/04/15 06:37 PM
1

I'm going to schedule an appointment with the Doctor, and if the pregnancy is confirmed/disproved, I'm going to inform her parents and send her to India. I know she's going to put up one hell of a fight to go to India, but I'm going to try my best to send her home. I actually prayed for the pregnancy test to be negative, as things are exponentially more complex now.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/04/15 05:24 PM
0

I do lift (I've never been lifting as much as I've done the past three weeks), and I learnt Tae Kwon Do long time ago, and I can very easily get her out of the way if I have to. The only problem is hurting her, as well as the danger of the 20 step stairs.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/04/15 05:22 PM
-7

What about my baby, if she's true?
/r/MarriedRedPill02/04/15 04:51 PM
2

Before people ask, I know divorce is probably the best course of action here. However, I'm not ready to take that yet, given her possible pregnancy, and also that I don't want to quit just because I can't apply RP consistently and correctly. I'm going to have to learn and implement RP anyways, so it might as well be to conquer her.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/04/15 08:20 PM
2

Thanks man! I know I have to be consistently on top of things with her to make it work. I had that happiness two weeks ago. I inadvertently started to slip down ever since. I need to get back into my game. Arguments: I have severely limited my arguments. For a couple of weeks, swatting shit tests was like second nature to me. That was also the time we had sex, so I think the chemicals I put in her helped a lot. Now I again feel it difficult to react correctly to shit tests, and often just give i…
/r/MarriedRedPill01/04/15 06:53 PM
1

This is not. We were married nearly 2 years ago. We never really had a honeymoon, or any moon, for that matter. Last week was the first time we had sex.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/04/15 06:43 PM
1

That's great advice! Thanks!
/r/MarriedRedPill01/04/15 04:36 PM
1

Spot on. Thanks for the advice. I realize it's foolish to be afraid of her, there by giving her power over me. She's like a predator sniffing for any fear. I was extremely successful when I simply had no fear of her a few weeks ago. Then I started having fears, but was good at hiding them. Now I can feel the fear openly. I think I brought this on myself by thinking that I'm in frame by doing everything normal whenever she disrespected me. I thought it is in my frame to not get anything she says …
/r/MarriedRedPill01/04/15 03:04 PM
1

Thanks for the advice. I'll make sure to express that I don't want a child now when she's like this. Sitting her down and telling her not to do stuff doesn't work with her. She spews feminist bullshit with a lot of help from facebook. The only method I've seen that works with her is to start submissive and gradually dominate. I have been working out on and off during the past 6 years, but I've never been working out as hard and as regular as I am now, so I expect to significantly increase my SMV…
/r/MarriedRedPill01/04/15 03:02 PM
1

She's a very conservative Indian woman with a very strict father whom she idolizes. During the 6 years I've known her, I know that she hasn't talked to very many guys in her life. She does have guys who used to flirt with her years ago, and there are a few guys she was crushing on for their intelligence/peacocking, but she has always been a very conservative person. That and the fact that she had her periods the day after she came back makes me know for sure that there's no foulplay (although I …
/r/MarriedRedPill01/04/15 02:39 PM
1

Yes. Waiting for marriage is the norm in our culture, although the culture is westernizing pretty fast. It was not an arranged marriage. I know her for 6 years. She was my colleague before marriage. While it is true that she was my first relationship, I'm not scared that I'll be alone if I leave her. On the contrary, I know for a fact that I shouldn't have been so stupid to commit to her and marry her inspite of all the red flags. I was the one who heavily woo'ed her during my BP days, so it's o…
/r/MarriedRedPill01/04/15 02:22 PM
4

A few things I did well the past 2 weeks: I've been working out regularly, and have just started 5x5. She has started hinting that she likes my better shape. I have been progressing on my goal of switching to a better paying job.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/04/15 12:52 AM
2

I'm slowly losing it again. I haven't had sex after those two times I bragged about a couple of weeks ago. I have had sex a grand total of two times (she too), and it seems like she's pregnant. We haven't taken the test yet, but she's having all symptoms of early pregnancy. She read about pregnancy and it said mood swings are also signs of early pregnancy, so she feels she's entitled for moodswings now. There have been a number of arguments gradually increasing in intensity with me gradually bec…
/r/MarriedRedPill01/04/15 12:42 AM
4

I can't underscore /u/strategos_autokrator 's point about not showing off your work. I've always experienced that I get the most satisfaction and happiness for the things I don't show off/brag to her. I modified my frame of mind to "there's nothing to show off. These are stuff that are the characteristics of a good leader." Ever since, whenever I do stuff, I'm happy that I'm a good leader. This behavior has leaked into my work at office as well, and it is doing wonders to my career.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/03/15 04:26 PM
3

Excellent post! This is one of the most important things that turned around my marriage. Whenever she was cooking, she always got mad when I was watching tv or browsing reddit. She'd order me to do some stuff, and I'd feel upset/disappointed/angry/passive aggressive because she stays at home all day, and I come home from work and she doesn't even let me relax. Then I realized that as long as I was not doing something productive and she was, she was always going to be the one in charge. I've star…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/03/15 04:20 PM
1

When you are getting hurt by what she says, it means you expect her to understand you and not say words that are hurtful. Realize that she is not like that. She will no understand you. No matter how much you love her and care for her, she will not stop getting hurt thinking you somehow hurt her. Stop caring about what she says, and stop engaging her by arguing.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/03/15 03:26 PM
5

I'd suggest you not respond to it, and if she brings it up in person, smile and say, "of course I do have a weak sense of self. In fact, my self is on life support now. I suppose yours should be about as strong as hercules now (this might also sound passive aggressive, so you can replace this with some witty line like 'a little mouth to mouth should revive it', and take her in a bear hug and kiss her)." Follow that up with a shit eating grin. If my wife did this, I would also slap her on her ass…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/03/15 03:14 PM
1

I feel honored and happy for my success to be linked in your post. A few months ago, when my marriage was falling apart, I accidentally stumbled upon TRP, and posted about my situation and asked for advice. Every single reply (or the overwhelming majority) was telling me to get divorced. Then somebody suggested that I post my questions here. That is how I came across MRP. MRP taught me to own my shit and gave me the real solution to my problem. To improve myself. Even then, I was for a long time…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/03/15 03:30 PM
1

I agree with you. I feel like I have to continuously work on this, or else face the same fate as my old self. Although I did very well last week, I still haven't gotten my shit together. What I have realized is that if I don't keep impressing myself and do good on my goals, I start feeling foggy and distracted, and my wife starts going back to her old self, which actually means that I'm going back to my old self. One thing I did good last week was on working out. I didn't lose a single pound, bu…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/03/15 08:11 PM
4

Last week went generally great. I wanted to go indoor rock climbing, and my wife was dead against it, because it was $25, and she didn't want me to waste money on something 'pointless'. (I took her to a movie and a restaurant the previous weekend for ~$50. Go figure.) I stood my ground saying I definitely wanted to do this. She tried all sorts of stuff, but I kept cool and was not at all bothered by her being upset (I was sometimes, internally, but didn't show it). There were a few times when I …
/r/MarriedRedPill11/03/15 07:12 PM
7

I've been trying to go RP for about 4 months, but I was never really out of BP until very recently. I was at the lowest point of my life 2 weeks ago, but then suddenly something clicked. All this time, I felt extremely hurt and disappointed whenever my wife told me I didn't love her or care for her or say something really stupid or hurtful to me. At my lowest point, I suddenly realized that I was getting hurt/pissed off because I had been assuming she was my soulmate/angel/whatever who had to kn…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/03/15 03:31 PM
1

Here is how I'm planning on improving myself. Fitness Plan I'm 5'8" and weigh 200 pounds. I'm planning to shed 25 pounds and get to 175 pounds. I've done that already from 210 to 175, just before I met my wife 6 years ago, but I have been slipping since. In order to achieve this, I'm planning to hit the gym 4-5 times every week. Last week and this week thus far I've been regularly hitting the gym with my wife, and I'm already beginning to see the difference. One of my other major setback is that…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/03/15 06:47 PM
1

I'm beginning to understand that my wife is actually a nice guy. She threw a shit test at me (or is it a comfort test?) today, saying that over the past 3 months (ever since I came across rp), I've stopped caring about her. Previously I used to give her leg massages on my own, and I used to shower her with praises and kisses for her cooking after every meal (even if it was bad), bend over backwards to make sure she was happy, but now I've stopped, or at least restricted doing those things. I tri…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/03/15 10:16 PM
1

You're right that I should have called an ambulance. I guess I kind of knew she was overselling it and I didn't want to incur huge medical expenses. But I should have swallowed that to teach her the lesson she needed. I have for the most part stopped responding to any of the shit tests she throws at me. However, there are times when she outright demands that I answer her questions, or comment on her allegations about me. It is in those situations that I open my mouth and put my foot in there. An…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/03/15 10:00 PM
3

You're right that I can't hold it down for extended amounts of time. After a few days of good stuff, it starts to feel like I'm slipping, and my wife slowly starts getting more and more easily irritated. I don't know if it is really me or her, but I'm getting better at it by acknowledging it when I start feeling foggy/out of control. Other thing is, I have a few personal goals that I haven't been successfully working on. (Getting a certification, switching to a better job). Often times, I just p…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/03/15 09:45 PM
2

I've started regrowing the mustache. It's a 3 month process though, so I'm still disappointed for having shaved it off.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/03/15 06:32 PM
1

I don't need pity. I don't feel bad. I'm not BP anymore. I just found out the right way to be RP after a horrible experience. I'll never be BP again. I like my life now.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/03/15 04:41 PM
1

Last week was the lowest point in my entire adult life. My wife came home from abroad, and it was the first time I was meeting her in person since learning RP. She kept complaining that I was arrogant/aggressive towards her, and started acting aggressive towards me. Initially when she came, she was very different from her old self; very submissive, and didn't pick fights for silly reasons like before. Now, she was saying I became what she previously was to me, and if I didn't stop that she'll be…
/r/MarriedRedPill03/03/15 04:03 PM
2

Oh I do love hugging and kissing my wife. The reason I asked is that I might do it wrong and either fuck the situation further up or get back into BP life.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/02/15 02:44 AM
1

Thanks. Onwards and upwards!
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/15 11:41 PM
2

This is brilliant! I can already picture doing this with my wife. Thanks man!
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/15 11:40 PM
1

I agree. Next time she asks me why I wouldn't react to what she said, I'm just going to say that thinking it more is only going to give me unnecessary stress, so I'm better off staying out of it.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/15 11:07 PM
2

Thinking through, I think the reason why I do this is because both of us like me handling her like a child. I get a sense of control, and she likes it because she feels cared. However, as you say, she actually likes it because it puts her on a pedestal, so I should limit and check when I say stuff like this. She doesn't usually snap at me when I say things like this. She does it when she's angry. I was not upset when she snapped because of any CCs, but because she's upset at something. Again, I …
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/15 11:03 PM
1

Thanks for the advice. I was really good for the past few weeks. I don't know what got into me today. A&A works very well with my wife. That and me being honest about my opinions help a lot these days.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/15 10:59 PM
3

Exactly. If I were not BP today, I would have done the same. I would have just said "Oh! I don't know why they said that suddenly. Hmm.." and left it at that. Even she told me she expected me to say something like that. Instead I took it upon myself to fix an issue that didn't exist, and created a bigger one in its place.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/15 10:54 PM
2

This sounds great. Could you give me an example of how you raise her emotions to sex? Also, when you admit your irrational behavior, how do you do it? Do you apologise? and if you do, how do you apologise?
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/15 10:33 PM
1

What she means is that I'm afraid that I'm supporting what my parents did, and if I say something supporting my parents she'd get into a fight, so I'm playing it safe by being noncommital. Agree and Amplify works great for me. That's my goto technique to diffuse her shit tests. This time thought I let the situation go out of my control. I agree with you that I should have dealt with my mother in a different time. While I do feel bad about making my parents go (they went there), and while I feel …
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/15 10:13 PM
3

She has some very serious gastrointestinal issues coupled with motion sickness. The last time we both went on a 21 hour flight, she was fine for the first 10 hours, but then started gagging and vomiting. She had severe stomach ulcers for the next week, and during the entire flight, all she could eat was a banana I bought her in the airport. I agree about brushing her issues aside. Most of times, it's not an issue worth worrying about. I should learn to stop responding too much to her issues. I'v…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/15 10:07 PM
2

Thanks for the advice. Smile, hug, and kiss Should I do this as if I like doing it, or as if I'm mocking her? My wife has said many times in my BP days that whenever she's mad, I just had to hug and kiss her and she'd melt.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/15 09:53 PM
3

I'll add that to my reading list, thank you.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/15 09:31 PM
1

Playing carefully is a word she used. I don't walk on eggshells. I used to all the time, but I'm consciously not doing that anymore. Of course there are some occasional slips, but I'm getting better. I understand what you mean, but how do I respond when she asks me what I feel about what she said? I had kept saying just ok, but she tells me I can't keep not responding to anything she says. She asks me what I feel about what she said. I know I should not listen to what she says, but how do I resp…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/15 09:30 PM
2

Oh and you're totally right about my father being BP. He and my mother are the reason why I'm in this sub.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/15 08:25 PM
2

I agree. I initially thought I was not affected by her getting upset, but I ended up having a very big fight with my mother and brother for not going. I know for sure that I would have handled this differently if I were calm. I feel ashamed now.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/15 08:23 PM
3

She was complaining because of the sudden change of plans by my parents. She said her parents might think she did something to piss off my parents, and it would be bad for her. Thanks for the advice. How do I respond if she starts acting up? Like not answering properly, answering in one word, etc. If I say 'take some bananas for the flight', she says 'I'll take care of what I should take. You don't worry about that.' How do I react to this while maintaining frame?
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/15 08:22 PM
2

That's what I did in the beginning. I just said ok. She then started talking like she was angry. Didn't respond to my questions properly. That's why I asked her what's wrong, and she said I didn't tell her anything about what my parents did. When she starts giving curt responses to my questions and not answer properly, what is the best thing to do?
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/15 08:19 PM
1

I think I've been a little unclear about my situation. She is in India, my parents and in-laws are in India. I'm in USA. She is traveling to US from India. My parents being Nice Guys, promised over and over to her parents and she that they'd accompany her to the airport to bid farewell. In truth, they weren't that interested in going to the airport. A few hours before the flight, they bailed and said they wouldn't be going to the airport with her. She is upset because her parents think highly ab…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/15 08:01 PM
0

Thank you!
/r/MarriedRedPill14/02/15 03:24 AM
0

Thanks for the advice. How do I respond when she asks why I'm suddenly setting these boundaries when I had never set such things in many years? Do I owe her an explanation? If so, what?
/r/MarriedRedPill14/02/15 12:30 AM
1

Wow! I want to be that guy! Could somebody please put in a hypothetical conversation about how this would have went down? Oftentimes, I know what to do in my head, but my tone and delivery comes out dead wrong, making me look like I'm arrogant, butthurt or a sensitive pussy. Some real world example would help a lot in orienting myself in the right direction.
/r/TheRedPill07/02/15 04:01 PM
2

That's what I meant to say. I'm not doing any of the things to get her approval. I'm saying if I'm consistent, she would automatically stop questioning me. The first and the most difficult person to impress is myself.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/01/15 05:31 PM
1

I realize that came out wrong, but what I mean is that I can't make her trust me without consistently being the best. By prove, I just meant that I'm not yet at a position where she'll never question my decision because they're always right.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/01/15 05:29 PM
1

Wait, you're woman? You're amazing! Thanks for the spot on perspectives and insightful advice!
/r/MarriedRedPill26/01/15 07:59 AM
0

I guess it really varies from woman to woman. My wife wants to be an equal, and wants to take care of me as much as I take care of her (of course I know that's only in her mind. But still, that's her intention).
/r/MarriedRedPill26/01/15 07:56 AM
1

I agree with you, and I've come to this realization as well. I'm learning to tell her stuff while maintaining my frame. I'm trying to not tell her any stuff that will make me seem like a wuss. In fact she said "When I say I want you to say everything, I don't mean everything". It was eye opening. From another comment: I had an eye opening exchange with her today. We were talking over skype, and her grand mother passed by. I talked to her with my wife also listening. I jokingly asked her grandmot…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/01/15 07:52 AM
1

My wife asks me a hundred questions when I say 'I'll handle it', and never believes in me. I realize that it is because I'm yet to prove myself to her, and I've been actively getting better at improving myself, and I know that she'll soon become like you. Thanks for the perspective.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/01/15 07:49 AM
0

God I'd never use the word red pill! I know too well about her. She really hates it if I put a name to my feelings/conditions. I believe I have ADHD, and she hated it. I said I have depression, and she hated it. Her view is that it's stupid to go to the internet for each and every issue you have and find a name for it. I've observed that if I say this is how I'm going to be, she gets extremely uncomfortable and annoyed. Instead, I've learned to assure her that my feeling towards her has not chan…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/01/15 07:48 AM
1

For the past few weeks, I've been really happy with my relationship. I've managed to pass her shit tests. I've always seen this trend in her. In my BP days, we'd fight every single weekend. At one point, I started getting scared for the weekends and any time spent with her. Even if things go good for a week, she'll suddenly start something totally unrelated, and I'd flip my shit because there was no reason to bring it up. It would lead to a huge fight, and I'd always end up apologizing and feel …
/r/MarriedRedPill26/01/15 07:42 AM
1

I've said this in another comment, but here it is again. I actually bought a journal yesterday, and she asked me if she can read it. I said no. Then she playfully/passive agressively asked what I'd do if she reads it. I immediately agreed and amplified. I said I'd break her legs and strangle her if she did. She finally said something like 'you have grown so much. Remember the days when you never kept anything from me' and so on. I again agreed and amplified, and she finally resigned to the fact …
/r/MarriedRedPill26/01/15 07:35 AM
1

I agree with you. Empty words wont matter much for long time. Although she's aware that I'm depressed and not doing my best, she's understanding, and doesn't press too much on that front. That is the comfort test part. Her shit tests are however continuing in other minor parts, and I've lately been very successful passing them.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/01/15 07:34 AM
1

This feels exactly right about my wife (hopefully this is what she's doing). I've started doing more and being more than I've been. My current necessity is that I should be studying for an important certification, take the test, acquire it, and switch jobs as soon as I get that certificate. My problem is that I guess I'm scared if I'd pass it (it costs $200 to take the exam, and it's a completely new technology to me), and I'm wasting my time gaming and redditing. I need to pull myself up, and g…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/01/15 07:32 AM
2

I feel this is spot on about my wife. I've also seen my success stories where I tell her my alpha always perks her up. However, sometimes I say talk too much and make it look like I'm bragging, so I'm trying to tone it down a bit.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/01/15 07:25 AM
2

I actually bought a journal yesterday, and she asked me if she can read it. I said no. Then she playfully/passive agressively asked what I'd do if she reads it. I immediately agreed and amplified. I said I'd break her legs and strangle her if she did. She finally said something like 'you have grown so much. Remember the days when you never kept anything from me' and so on. I again agreed and amplified, and she finally resigned to the fact that I will have a journal, and changed topic. In the end…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/01/15 07:23 AM
1

I had an eye opening exchange with her today. We were talking over skype, and her grand mother passed by. I talked to her with my wife also listening. I jokingly asked her grandmother to get foot massages from my wife. Her grandmother then told my wife to give foot massages to me. My wife then pulled passive aggressive shit on me and said I'd always said I didn't need them, but she'd never trust me again, because I'd later come back and said I said I didn't need one, but keep it deep in my mind …
/r/MarriedRedPill26/01/15 07:20 AM
2

I've observed myself to uncontrollably blabber stuff that makes me look like a brag/wimp/pussy. I'm learning to keep my mouth shut.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/01/15 07:19 AM
1

It's a new feeling to me. Toxicity has always been a major part of my life. I still feel depressed and hate myself if I waste a day. I'm getting out of that gradually. I've started doing more stuff that pleases me, and she makes it very clear that she doesn't like it. At the same time, I also see this change in me that she actually likes me doing stuff like that. The only thing is, whenever I say something like even if you don't like to do it, I'm going to do it, she says I'm very selfish. I'm l…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/01/15 07:18 AM
1

Could you give me an example how this works?
/r/MarriedRedPill26/01/15 07:11 AM
1

I've observed that I have a tendency to spill out everything, and later regret why I said things that made me look like a pussy/wimp/out of frame. I'll keep this in mind. Thanks!
/r/MarriedRedPill26/01/15 07:10 AM
0

That's good advice. Thanks! Actually, I had an eye opening exchange with her today. We were talking over skype, and her grand mother passed by. I talked to her with my wife also listening. I jokingly asked her grandmother to get foot massages from my wife. Her grandmother then told my wife to give foot massages to me. My wife then pulled passive aggressive shit on me and said I'd always said I didn't need them, but she'd never trust me again, because I'd later come back and said I said I didn't …
/r/MarriedRedPill26/01/15 07:08 AM
1

Sorry for not replying sooner. I'm still here. I wanted to answer things honestly and wanted to set aside some time to answer the questions. I'll be answering the threads now.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/01/15 07:02 AM
2

This is great advice. Thank you!
/r/MarriedRedPill25/01/15 06:45 AM
2

As far as I know her (I know her for 6 years), she's very dependent. Even she admits this. I personally don't like opening up myself completely to anyone. I talk about certain things to certain people. Especially, I never like talking about my shortcomings to her, as I feel like I'm losing my frame. However, I've been very blue pill to her for the past 6 years, so she is very used to me being that way. She many times has told that that is what made her love me. So now she doesn't like that I won…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/01/15 06:43 AM
2

Thanks for the concern man! I was indeed very depressed and contemplated suicide occationally for about a year, but it was mostly directly because of me being a nice guy and an omega. I feel a lot better for the past month. My wife is also very supportive these days. I'm slowly getting back on track. I still have days when I come home from work and waste the whole day browsing, gaming, or junk eating, and feel terrible after that. That's changing. It was not an understatement when I said I gaine…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/01/15 03:06 AM
1

Well, there've been cases I've withheld information because she'd be upset, but she keeps insisting that no matter how upsetting it is, I should not keep things from her. She trusts me that I don't keep anything from her, and that she has seen me in all highs and lows so she'll actually feel very happy if I expose my most vulnerable to her.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/01/15 08:24 PM
1

The thing is, she keeps telling me to tell her everything. My problems, my insecurities, and so on. I'm pretty sure she'd not like it if I did that, but she still keeps on insisting that I don't 'hide' anything from her. She also hates it if I write a journal with things I don't say to her.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/01/15 08:22 PM
2

I completely agree. Even in my completely BP days, I used to pick her up and manhandled her playfully, and she loves those things till date.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/01/15 07:18 PM
1

How do I answer if she says, "well, if you know it was a long workout why didn't you come sooner? Dont you want to spend time with your wife and kid?"
/r/MarriedRedPill24/01/15 07:08 PM
2

I agree with you. My wife can get so upset it literally affects her health seriously (I know she's not making it up). I've started to consciously not get angry with her. I've started maintaining frame and it's starting to pay off. It's a difficult road, but I'm getting there.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/01/15 06:53 PM
0

I beg to differ. If you could take your time to read the threads again, you'd see that I've even thanked people for 'slapping me in the face' with hard truths. I've responded to a majority of advice, and have provided my point of view for people who advised me that I should have divorced her, or to even people who accused me of trolling. I don't understand how you expect a hardcore omega guy in a traumatical, depressing situation with a suicidal mindset to immediately understand all the advice i…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/01/15 02:34 AM
0

I don't completely understand what you mean. I don't know what this subreddit lost because of my posts, but I gained my life through the invaluable advice I received in the comments to those posts. Hope the mods don't ban people seeking help and turn this sub into /r/marriedredpillmasterrace where only red pill guys talk among themselves about topics they all know.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/01/15 12:31 AM
1

I guess that's why I feel good about myself when I'm angry.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/01/15 02:37 AM
0

Wow! I could kiss you right now (on the cheeks of course)! I've only recently started getting angry at her, or at anyone who insults or irks me. I used to never get angry, at least for the past 6 years, not coincidentally since we started dating. She herself has often been disappointed in me for not getting angry (at somebody else at my work) when I was insulted. I always thought I was doing a great thing. I love the angry me now, although sometimes I feel I go overboard. I never connected that …
/r/MarriedRedPill15/01/15 09:39 PM
1

This is astounding. I feel like I should take notes! Thanks for sharing your wisdom.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/01/15 08:32 PM
1

Thanks for the example. That really helped!
/r/MarriedRedPill15/01/15 07:53 PM
1

She wouldn't let it go that way. She wants me to acknowledge that what I did/said was horrible/disgusting, and wants me to apologize to her.
/r/askTRP25/12/14 07:07 PM
2

You again. Thanks for MMSL Primer. I purchased it yesterday and currently reading it. I know what answers to give to your questions to pass the RP test, but many of the real answers are downright embarrassing. However, I'm baring my cards to you because you seem genuinely concerned, and because it feels good to confide in someone my shortcomings. To preserve what little dignity I have left, I'm sending the answers in a private message.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/12/14 06:41 PM
1

I've replied to the previous comment with an example. http://www.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/2qd4jn/how_do_you_guys_reacthandle_when_something_you/cn52zf9
/r/askTRP25/12/14 04:56 PM
1

I'm talking about casual conversations when she suddenly gets offended by something I say. I don't remember many such incidents (I have a poor memory), but I'll tell you one incident in the recent past that stuck to my memory. This was 2 months ago. I left her in India because she can't handle the East Coast winter. Since she's not working anymore, I gave her my Indian ATM card, so she can use it while she's there. The night before my travel, I purchased some sweets, and got my card from her to …
/r/askTRP25/12/14 04:54 PM
1

Every teenager on Earth goes through this addiction stage with their first love, this idea that it's worth sacrificing everything to be with her. Usually what happens is you learn a very important life lesson six months later when you've split up and you upset your friends so much they want nothing to do with you. Sounds like that didn't happen with you. Oh that happened. My best friend (also one of my roommates) at that time shifted his room without telling me. My other room mates looked for a …
/r/askTRP24/12/14 07:27 PM
1

Thanks for the advice. In the mean time, how do you suggest I handle her? Do I continue the BP stuff and promise her I won't look at other women, or stay put in my stand? I mean, I know how to check out women without her noticing, but the thing that ticked me off is that she brought up an 8 month old topic without any stimulus. That's what she often does. When things are going smoothly, she'll bring some old issue where I apologized for something. She says sometimes those things cross her mind a…
/r/askTRP24/12/14 04:37 PM
1

I realize there's nothing so unique to her that I can't find in any other woman. Thing is, I always knew she was this possessive and conservative, innocent girl who wanted to have me for just herself. I had a handful of female friends, but she made me cut contact with all of them. I should have broken up right then, 6 years ago. But I didn't. I was too addicted to the first girl who was in love with me, and I thought that was the best feeling, and worth sacrificing things. I realize how stupid I…
/r/askTRP24/12/14 04:19 PM
1

Thanks for your support! I realize there's nothing so unique to her that I can't find in any other woman. Thing is, I always knew she was this possessive and conservative, innocent girl who wanted to have me for just herself. I had a handful of female friends, but she made me cut contact with all of them. I should have broken up right then, 6 years ago. But I didn't. I was too addicted to the first girl who was in love with me, and I thought that was the best feeling, and worth sacrificing thing…
/r/askTRP24/12/14 03:51 PM
0

I'm not saying I have to get married to someone. I'm saying it feels hard to think about not being married to her.
/r/askTRP24/12/14 01:30 PM
-4

I don't really know how to answer that. I love her, and it somehow feels wrong to not be married.
/r/askTRP24/12/14 01:52 AM
1

That worked just once.
/r/askTRP23/12/14 03:55 PM
2

If she does it again, tell her you will talk about it tomorrow and go back to bed. You are not a pet dog to be woken and made to do tricks to make her happy, so don't act like it. I've tried that. She usually rips off the blanket and pulls me up. I swear to God I'm not trolling.
/r/askTRP23/12/14 03:17 PM
1

I realize that. It's just that the pill is too hard to swallow.
/r/askTRP23/12/14 03:16 PM
1

Thanks. I'll cut all contact and make it my mission to get fit.
/r/askTRP23/12/14 03:16 PM
1

I can't fault you for calling me a troll. I know I fucked up big time. I've been trying to get help with TRP for the past 6 months. I've posted a few times under different throwaway accounts, but always got called Troll and never given any helpful advice. Yesterday was the first time I got some great advice. Thanks for your advice. I'm going to message back what you've said.
/r/askTRP23/12/14 03:15 PM
0

I'm sorry but that picture is unfair. Those south Indian women have been selectively chosen to emphasize the point. They are not pretty by even south Indian standards, and there is a huge variety among actual south Indian women.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/12/14 05:11 AM
0

The more I read all the comments here and /r/asktrp, the more I feel that I should have slapped her in those occasions instead of trying to act like a gentleman and eat up insults and more.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/12/14 05:06 AM
1

Thanks, man! That is very helpful. I'm going to start by working out all days this week.
/r/askTRP23/12/14 05:01 AM
1

This is very useful. Thank you!
/r/askTRP23/12/14 04:57 AM
1

I'm not so sure about that. In her own family, her father is the absolute Alpha, while my father is the best example of a beta. Everybody in her family looks at him with awe, fear, and respect. The thing is, she has idolized him, his short temper, and the way others fear him, from her childhood, and slowly become like he himself. She expects me to be like him, but she wouldn't be like her mother, whose submission made her father become the alpha he is.
/r/askTRP23/12/14 02:03 AM
-2

She's an extremely conservative girl. That kind of talk would repulse her.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/12/14 01:38 AM
1

Yes. That's the custom, although I moved out to a different city after college because of my job.
/r/askTRP23/12/14 01:35 AM
1

...
/r/askTRP23/12/14 01:26 AM
1

Yes
/r/askTRP23/12/14 01:23 AM
1

I'm willing to take control of my life. I just don't want to divorce her. I want a better solution, where in I conquer her, and live the life of a personal king.
/r/askTRP23/12/14 12:43 AM
1

This sounds great! I'll try this. I'm going to do this.
/r/askTRP23/12/14 12:42 AM
1

Thing is, her family is very respectful to me, and only ever argue with her on behalf of me. The problem is not really her family. My family, may be. My mother expects a lot, and I've been learning to put her in her place. The main problem is my wife. How do I make her my bitch?
/r/askTRP23/12/14 12:21 AM
1

When you put it that way...
/r/askTRP23/12/14 12:19 AM
1

Thanks for the advice. I'll stay put this time. I'll not call her, message her, or attend her calls. After a day or two, I'll attend her call, and listen to what she has to say. If she is sorry, I'll talk to her, if not, I'll hang up again.
/r/askTRP23/12/14 12:17 AM
0

I know I should start working out, but I'm not doing it. Most days, I just sit around (alone, she's abroad) doing nothing useful, play games, browse reddit, and go to bed without even dinner. Everytime I do that, I hate myself more. I feel like I'm in depression, but I can't seem to change. Sometimes when my mood is up, I do productive things, other times, I just laze around, and a part of me holds me back from changing for the better.
/r/askTRP23/12/14 12:14 AM
1

I see what you mean, and I'm going to really hold my stand going forward.
/r/askTRP23/12/14 12:10 AM
1

We haven't even had sex once in the 2 years. I was eager in the beginning, but she was so scared, it was painful for her, and she wouldn't try any easy positions for me, and with constant arguments, including her throwing things and hitting me, I lost my libido. Things are a bit better now compared to those days, but I can see that she tries to guilt me at least once a week or two.
/r/askTRP23/12/14 12:09 AM
1

31 is her. I'm 28
/r/askTRP23/12/14 12:05 AM
1

We both had to really convince our parents to marry us both, due to a lot of obstacles for our marriage (age difference, different castes, social status (she's rich, I'm not), all of which are pretty big in our culture. Now I can't go back to them within a couple of years and get a divorce. I wanted a happy life with her, and I'll do my best to get that. I realize that part of the problem is me for my blue pill behavior, so I want to correct this and make it a great marriage.
/r/askTRP22/12/14 11:47 PM
1

The biggest problem is, I've been a beta/blue pill to her for the past 6 years. Now I'm trying to change, and everything I do differently enrages her, and she accuses me that I'm changing. How do I transition to a Red Pill smoothly?
/r/askTRP22/12/14 11:24 PM
2

She says you are the one that makes her angry? The next time she gets angry, you go radio silent. You don't want to anger her further do you? I've tried doing that, and she'd ask, "I know you're clever and you'd keep silent and conserve your energy while I shout my way to death. I want you to talk" and press me until I say something. Most importantly, it's easy to hang up when the fight's over phone. How do I handle this when the fight's in person? I've often stormed out during a fight, but wher…
/r/askTRP22/12/14 11:21 PM
0

The thing is, it's not easy to leave/divorce her. Even if I decide to, she's not going to let me. She'll say something or other, back down, do anything, and stop that. Then after a few days go back to her ways. Both our parents wouldn't let that happen that easily. Also, I married her after so many people thought we wouldn't workout. I want to prove them wrong. Above all, I still get the fuzzies sometimes when I think of her.
/r/askTRP22/12/14 11:12 PM
1

The thing is, a couple of weeks ago, I got really upset with her always getting hurt one way or another in things I say, even though I never mean to hurt her. It became a huge fight, and I said I'm extremely depressed, and that I don't want her to ever talk to me. She immediately backed down, saying she was sorry for always getting hurt for things I say instead of trusting me that I would never mean to hurt her. Since that was the first time ever she said that to me, I was happy. However, within…
/r/askTRP22/12/14 11:08 PM
1

I can't really pinpoint what makes her special. Sometimes she's really a kid. Until I explained her, she didn't even know how sex worked! She's crazy for cats, and is adorably childish some times. Those are the things I love about her. There are also a lot of other things that I'm not comfortable with, like her attitude towards my family, her devotion towards her father, her unwillingness to adjust for anything less than her lifestyle before marriage, her possessiveness towards me, and the expec…
/r/askTRP22/12/14 11:04 PM
2

I've tried doing that, but she hits back saying I'm the one who's immature and running away from discussing things. She also says I'm the one who's turning normal conversations into arguments. The thing is, something in the way she asks things gets on my nerves, coupled with past experiences. She gets real ugly when she's angry, and curses left and right. That's a big turnoff for me, and I've told her that so many times. But she says I'm the one making her angry, and it's only her natural reacti…
/r/askTRP22/12/14 11:00 PM
1

The thing is, we both know our passwords for everything, although I never snoop into her messages. However, she snoops into my messages and, if she doesn't like any of it, fights about her. If I change my password, she'll ask why, and if I have something to hide. And that may be she should also be the same with me. That it's stupid of her to tell me each and every thing.
/r/askTRP22/12/14 10:57 PM
-1

Thing is, I don't like to talk to her when I'm angry with her. However, she stays awake all night when she's angry, and her gastric ulcer comes back in full fury. She says all her health issues in her life are only because of me. She tells me if I really care about her, I should give more importance to her health, and end the argument so that she can go to sleep. This has made me begrudgingly apologize to her just to end an argument. And she later uses these apologies as her strongholds, saying …
/r/askTRP22/12/14 10:53 PM
1

Her nature is that she wouldn't apologize openly for anything she did. Should I press her to apologize for not trusting me? Also, she'll ask me if I'll look at other girls. How do I answer that? If I say yes, that's how men are made, then she'll say she'll lose love for me. How do I respond to that?
/r/askTRP22/12/14 10:50 PM
-5

I don't want to take the easy way out. I love her when she's not this hamster. How do I mold her to my liking?
/r/askTRP22/12/14 10:11 PM
0

I don't want to leave her, or fuck other women. I absolutely adore her when she's not like this, and we have way too many memories. How do I bring her around? How do I make her be the way I want?
/r/askTRP22/12/14 10:10 PM
0

You should have just hung up after the third time she asked the same thing over and over again, although your engaging into the drama offered some very valuable insights. She gets really mad if I do that, and keeps calling again and again until I pick the call. I know it's bad on me to allow that, but she gets very aggressive during an argument, and if I get too angry, I'll hit her, and I don't want that. How do I handle this constant calling and wanting to talk when I don't want to? Firstly: Ne…
/r/askTRP22/12/14 10:08 PM
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