Lukkychukky Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
26	Well… I’m fucked. Yeah, man. This sucks. You’re not crazy, you’re not weak, and you’re absolutely not alone. What you're describing is the kind of slow-burn betrayal that doesn’t make headlines but still guts you. You tried to do the right thing — for your kids, for your family, for your marriage — and now it feels like you’re getting punished for trying to hold it all together. Let’s just name what’s happening here: you fought to bring the family back together. You let her move back in. You gave everything. And …	/r/Divorce_Men	28/05/25 05:17 PM
10	Figuring out what to do in regard to intimacy/sex? Man, I really feel this. You’re not alone. What you’re describing is something a lot of us go through after a dead bedroom or emotionally disconnected marriage. It’s not just about sex — it’s the loss of intimacy, closeness, and being seen by someone. That kind of void hits hard when the noise of a broken relationship quiets down and you’re left with silence and unmet emotional needs. What you’re feeling now isn’t just horniness or some superficial craving — it’s grief mixed with desire for real…	/r/Divorce_Men	12/05/25 07:11 PM
2	Well, I started the process Grief doesn’t ask if you were the one who ended it. It just shows up. You’re allowed to mourn the loss of your marriage, even if you were the one to say it out loud. Wanting out doesn’t mean you don’t feel the pain of everything that comes with that choice. You’re not grieving just the relationship — you’re grieving the vision you had for your family, the holidays you imagined, the everyday moments that won’t look the same anymore. That’s real. And it’s valid. Crying all day isn’t weakness. It’s…	/r/Divorce_Men	08/05/25 03:40 PM
4	Well, I started the process Sharing something so raw and painful like that takes real courage. What you're feeling is completely valid. Leaving a marriage, especially with kids involved, is never simple, and the guilt you're carrying shows how deeply you care about your children. You're not a "piece of shit" — you're a human being in an incredibly difficult situation, trying to balance your own needs with the wellbeing of your family. It's okay to grieve the pain this is causing, even if you're certain that staying in the …	/r/Divorce_Men	08/05/25 03:23 PM
0	Question for Women in this sub I mean, if you believe that about women, you’d have to believe something similar about men. Do you believe that men are capable of change? Of course they are. It’s ridiculous to deposit anything else. What we can ignore is that there are points that people get to in a relationship where you can’t turn the clock back. What you’re describing is what it looks like when women reach that point.So yeah, I guess that if they get to that point of no return, then you’re right?	/r/Divorce_Men	29/04/25 12:50 AM
6	How do you afford to live? God, me, too, dude. It's rough. Without my pension and disability, I'd be homeless.	/r/Divorce_Men	28/04/25 06:10 PM
8	Question for Women in this sub I lurk in the divorced women sub for the same reason. It’s good to get a perspective from the other side, to keep things in balance. Both subs can become an echo chamber, and that isn’t helpful when trying to navigate something as complex and painful as divorce.	/r/Divorce_Men	28/04/25 03:33 AM
6	Well I lost… It isn't right. That's the answer to your question. Despite significant progress in terms of gender equality, this is an area that is woefully draconian in its practice and execution. I am heartbroken to read your story, as well as those of the other men here simply wanting to be the father they want to - and should be allowed to - be. Family court is a business, and a predatory one at that. One that preys no the entrenched gender stereotypes and tears fathers away from their children. You are a…	/r/Divorce_Men	13/03/25 12:15 PM
1	Learning to set boundaries, not as good a feeling as I thought? Boundaries probably won't feel good, at first. I know I felt fairly strong guilt at doing this very thing. But they get easier with practice. Figure out what works for you, and put measures in place to protect your own mental health. Switching topics... I think something that is probably working against you - and others like you - in feeling good/better about boundaries is that it sounds like you're still very entwined with her. You're divorced? Then stop doing things for her. I'm not saying be …	/r/Divorce_Men	10/03/25 01:59 PM
1	The Accusations are hard to understand I mean… it is undeniably untrue. It’s as untrue as saying men aren’t emotional, don’t act on emotion. It’s intellectually dishonest.	/r/Divorce_Men	07/03/25 11:27 PM
-11	The Accusations are hard to understand It is demonstrably sexist to say that women don't think logically. And hey, I've been the victim of a woman who let her emotions ruin our marriage. But to just throw out a blanket statement like that is - and I'm sorry to be the one to break the news to you - sexist. That kind of stuff doesn't serve to make good decisions here. It just doesn't. That's allowing hurt to rule you. And making decisions out of anger and hurt rarely lead to anything good.	/r/Divorce_Men	07/03/25 03:16 PM
-13	The Accusations are hard to understand I agree with all of this... except for the inane statement that "women think emotionally, not logically." Not only is that untrue, it is sexist. There's no need to paint anyone in a worse light than they themselves are doing. Men and women can be driven by emotion over logic equally. Stick to the advice going forward.	/r/Divorce_Men	07/03/25 03:04 PM
12	Keeping your last name. While I get it, I've seen in the military how much of a hassle it is to change one's name. It's far more involved than you'd think. This is further complicated by the fact a lot of people have children, and the thought of not sharing the same last name as one's children can be deeply uncomfortable. It's okay to be bothered by this fact, that she's keeping your name. But you've gotta move on. Otherwise it'll just keep holding you down.	/r/Divorce_Men	27/02/25 01:40 PM
0	Well the affair partner just called me. I’m certainly not saying to fight. But I can’t really agree with the concept of fighting for 100%. I know what you mean, but fighting for 100% is going to provoke the other person to fight harder, and could potentially just make your situation worse.	/r/Divorce_Men	25/02/25 08:36 PM
1	Well the affair partner just called me. Thank you. It is indeed insane to think that cheating means that that parent should be cut out of a child’s life. I agree that part of a parent’s role is to model good healthy behavior for the children. And no one disagrees that cheating is anything but bad and unhealthy behavior. However, to think that someone who cheated is only capable of instilling the worst traits in their children, ignoring any other positive qualities that they almost certainly have, is ludicrous. There is some major proj…	/r/Divorce_Men	25/02/25 08:36 PM
2	Well the affair partner just called me. 100%? Come on, man. I get the impulse, but this isn’t a reason to take a child’s mother away. That’s a deeply unhealthy reflex. Edited for spelling.	/r/Divorce_Men	25/02/25 07:49 PM
7	The ‘DON’T LEAVE YOUR HOME’,’GET 50-50 CUSTODY’and ‘LET THE FAMILY AND FRIENDS KNOW ABOUT THE CHEATING’ are not an option anymore. Despite things being significantly better now than they ever have been for equity in divorce... it's still completely borked. The judge totally believed every unsubstantiated claim my ex made, with literally zero evidence provided. There is still the stereotype that mothers are most important, and societally we have a LONG way to go to view fathers as equal parents in most caregiving aspects. I'm sorry it's not going well for you. Stay strong, your kids love you and know they need you. Give it t…	/r/Divorce_Men	21/02/25 03:42 PM
1	Separated to divorce That's also true. Thank you for the course correction.	/r/Divorce_Men	20/02/25 06:48 PM
8	Separated to divorce Bro, I feel so sorry for you as I read this. What a tragic turn of events, especially since you put so much work into attempting reconciliation. That being said... Do. Not. Leave. Your. House. Stay put, and get a lawyer. File for divorce now, first. That puts you in charge. Do not compromise on anything. Take what is owed to you, because she sure as shit will. Fight for your kids, and fight for the remnants of your life. I'm sorry you're joining this club. But it's time to fight to protect yours…	/r/Divorce_Men	20/02/25 06:19 PM
4	In the hearing online right now. Good luck, brother. You've got this.	/r/Divorce_Men	10/12/24 03:24 PM
6	Wife wants M-F, I want 50/50. How to get her to agree? First off... If she makes significantly more than you, take the child support. Divorce is hard, don't make it harder. Second, get a lawyer. File first. Start the process on your terms. DO NOT concede to anything you even think you might regret. And third, recognize the point where the fight needs to stop. Namely, don't bankrupt yourself. That does you and your kids no good.	/r/Divorce_Men	09/12/24 03:47 PM
3	Moving out in a week, leaving my 17 yr old behind😔 Ugh... I... I would not recommend doing that. Your kids (if you have any) would probably want those one day. I get it, I get it... But - and again, only if you have kids - I wouldn't erase such a huge part of your life like that. At least not in the heat of the moment.	/r/Divorce_Men	24/10/24 02:49 PM