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Major-Platypus2092 Archive

View 0 posts and 550 comments by Major-Platypus2092 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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5

No it isn't. The OP is all about men thinking men are the problem. Which, if you just briefly read through many posts here, does appear to be the case in terms of protection specifically.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 05:36 PM
9

I said what I came to say, which is that you knew what she meant. I'll say it again: Most men here who say protection is one of the values provided by men mean protection against other men, not women.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 04:48 PM
1

<image>
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 04:40 PM
4

Lol this is so funny, it’s like that Twitter meme but for Reddit. <image>
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 04:40 PM
6

I'm going off-topic, but the rates at which cops commit DV and male military members commit rape/sexual harassment makes what you said kind of funny to me. Anyway, you know what she meant. Most men here who find protection as one of the values men provide mean protection against other men, not women.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 04:31 PM
3

And why would the government think it's a threat? SAHMs aren't going to strike and abandon their kids. It's a non-starter. You could've done a debate that laid out actual benefits for SAHMs, but instead you put up a goofy fantasy world. Many SAHMs are already compensated through their partners' work. If they're not, that's something to worry about with the dude you married. I'm all for social safety nets, but your proposition is much more preposterous than simply voting for progressive policies.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 11:04 PM
4

Great, good luck convincing moms to abandon their kids and destroy their families for a hypothetical future benefit.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 10:50 PM
8

Lmao I'm not arguing with you that we should use children against their mothers. I'm just telling you they WILL. And it WILL work because good parents don't want to leave their children to be victims of neglect. SAHMs will not leave their children, voluntarily giving up custody to go stay with other women. This is not a real suggestion.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 10:43 PM
13

Stay with other women? The other SAHM women who would be striking and also have no money? It's not a presumption that children can be used against their mothers... It's how parents tend to feel about their kids. The good ones, anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 10:39 PM
11

And how are the SAHMs supposed to afford to stay somewhere else if they're striking against the person who makes the money? The government won't care. It'd take a very, very long time to see sustained results from such a strike. And most SAHMs don't actually want to put their child at risk of neglect because they, you know, love them.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 10:34 PM
12

I don’t necessarily disagree with this, but I think the general focus should be more on creating spaces for people to meet and connect even platonically. The loss of third spaces has a bigger impact than anything, in my opinion. And is the easier fix. EDIT: Making it a “rule” that women approach is stupid. But suggesting that approaches don’t always have to be from men is fine. In this world though, women approaching wouldn’t be “special“ though because it would be commonplace. That’s kind of wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 02:47 PM
4

That’s our age gap too, and literally nobody batted an eye. We actually got introduced by friends, so clearly nobody cared.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 01:12 PM
12

If nobody cares in real life, why are you bothering to argue about it?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 01:11 PM
–

That… isn’t what that means. If I got sick, she’d be there just as I would. If she lost a limb, the same. If she had trouble with her memory, her ability to work. Fine. But if she just turned into a lazy child who expected me to be her father? Yeah, I’d leave her. Just as I’d expect her to leave me. Pathetic behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/26 07:01 PM
11

If you’re a sugar baby, you get to demand whatever you want. Doesn’t mean you’re going to get it, just like every kind of dating. I’d actually fine it more of a canary in a coal mine situation if women were lowering their standards.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/26 06:51 PM
7

I’m married in the US. I like the dynamic I have with my wife where we’re both supportive and respectful of each other. We make decisions as a team. I base my behavior off of who has earned my respect, not what’s in their pants.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/26 12:54 PM
3

Some men are sexist. Conservative cultures are going to be even more sexist because they specifically value hierarchical male leadership and raise their populations this way, so of course yes the dynamic will be stronger there. Nature at its finest? I’m not even sure what that means. It’s just behavior that has been reinforced by an environment or not stopped by an environment.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/26 12:38 PM
–

No, it means that my wife is a beautiful and successful person who wouldn’t want to be saddled with an incompetent man child. We have a pretty awesome relationship that I love. Have you ever been with a woman or are you making up theoretical exercises to make yourself feel better?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/26 12:29 PM
6

So maybe frame it that way instead of saying it like you believe it. This is exactly like your post. You're being completely unclear and expecting me to read your mind? Nah. Fuck out of here with that energy.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 09:29 PM
3

Because you all came and attacked me like I was doing something wrong for believing the words she wrote down.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 09:28 PM
5

The entire OP is about time being wasted. I’ve said multiple times he probably should’ve been more direct. it was literally my first comment. I come for people of any gender who assume entitlement over someone else just based on readjng into actions instead of being an adult and communicating. He was with her for a year, this isn’t a case of some dude pretending he wanted marriage to get a one night stand home with him. Why do you insist that women shouldn’t ensure their own happiness? Is it so …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 09:10 PM
5

The fuck? Holy shit you guys are insane. She literally commented and said “it is a waste of her fertility and beauty.” So obviously I should’ve taken that to mean “of course she can’t believe this, must be a man’s view.” Y’all will snatch an enemy out of the jaws of a friend. I’m in here constantly fighting for my life against shit ass red pill bros. You came at me for taking a woman at her word. Absolute nut job behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 09:06 PM
4

You literally commented and said “it is a waste of her fertility and beauty.” Not “men say…” so now I’m just supposed to extrapolate somethjng different because you want plausible deniability? Nah.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 09:05 PM
4

Dude this situation says nothing about what he promised her, only that she assumed they were serious and he disagreed. You’re making up a whole new thing. If someone lies to you, that’s on them. If you assume and believe what you want to believe, I’ll always suggest maybe having an adult conversatjon before blaming someone else for something you deluded yourself into.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 08:43 PM
4

And yet again, it’s the women who first came and pushed that narrative. Why am I advocating for women‘s intrinsic value harder than you? Why are you coming at me for suggesting a woman is worth more than what men want to do with her?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 08:41 PM
6

Nah. I think if you haven’t bothered to ask whether someone feels serious you can’t then turn around and blame them for wasting your time. You wasted your own time by that metric. Take ownership of your life. Could he have been more direct? Sure. But she’s a victim to her own inaction. And suggesting it was a “waste” is crazy, because if you’re that obsessed with getting married then it should be RIGHT top of mind when you’re dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 08:39 PM
7

I don’t think this is true. I have the same energy for dudes who get furious when they assume girls are more invested in relationships than they are just by reading too much into their actions. Now if someone’s actually lying and saying ”yes I see marriage in our future” and then turn around and cackle and say “just kidding,” that’s pretty cruel.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 08:35 PM
4

I disagree. It doesn’t sound like he promised her anything, she just believed what she wanted to. Why would someone look over randomly just to say “hey you know I don’t like you all that much, right?” He might not have seen any issue since they were both hanging out, and she was secretly harboring thoughts of marriage that she didn’t bother to bring up.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 08:23 PM
5

Sure but like, how is this the literal first time she’s hearing this? The way the story sounds she just assumed he was serious based on lots of random assumptions. Why not be an adult and have a conversation? How are you even ready for a serious relationship if you can’t say “hey I feel like we’re serious, how do you feel?”
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 08:09 PM
3

I understand what you’re saying, but I do think if your understanding of a relationship is that it’s ”serious and heading for marriage” you shouldn’t be guessing based on vibes. That’s a conversation. By the time I proposed to my wife, neither of us was surprised. We had talked openly a bunch about our future in concrete ways for about a year before I proposed.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 06:58 PM
1

By you, though. You’re the one who came here and said that. Not me. So maybe stop endorsing that narrative. She’s a human person with worth outside of dudes wanting to fuck her. Jesus Christ
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 06:49 PM
3

And yet the only people who responded to my comment pushing that agenda have been women. Like, stop enforcing this on yourselves. I’ve never looked at my wife that way. Why are you?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 06:48 PM
0

That’s wild. Living your life is not a waste. Having experiences, even when they don’t go the way you wanted, is not a waste. It’s like some people see their lives only through optimization and I gotta tell you, you’ll regret that later.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 06:47 PM
11

I mean, ew. What a strange way to describe your friend.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 06:30 PM
15

I don’t think so. But I don’t understand this framing anyway. Being in a loving relationship for a year is not a “waste.” The only thing I’d see as deception is if someone pretended they wanted kids or a marriage in general only to pull the rug out later. But a year isn’t even that long of a relationship in the scheme of things. Yall should be asking each other about priorities if it matters to you. He seems to be unnecessarily cruel about it though. People should also be direct if don’t want to…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 06:21 PM
6

I don’t really like using the term “worth” or “worthless” because it suggests we don’t all have intrinsic value. We do. That said, no one wants to date someone who is capable but unwilling to behave like an adult. So yeah, if those are the examples of men you’re seeing I could see how you arrive at that conclusion. I don’t believe that’s a correct sampling of most men, but I have seen men who… disappoint me as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 03:10 PM
12

No it isn’t. I personally don’t give a shit at all if someone shoots someone after years of abuse. Good for you. It’s self-defense.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 05:27 PM
13

I wouldn’t consider women who kill their abusers as garden variety murderers. That’s also not the same thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 05:03 PM
10

I think anyone nearing 40 who is dating someone fresh out of college is very weird at best. I don’t give a shit who it is.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 04:45 PM
1

So I've got a couple of points to that. One, women absolutely do have to try. You've clearly never seen a woman who puts zero effort in. And two, nothing about life is fair. So. If that's your mindset, might as well fade away into nihilism right now.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 12:51 AM
5

I didn’t have any made up standards in my head for the ideal woman or looks that I demanded. I went out with lots of different types of girls. I personally think she’s hot as fuck.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 09:18 PM
11

I don’t want the kind of woman who demands lots of money or a six pack or whatever. And I found one! Good news is I didn’t demand she adhere to any sort of shallow metrics either, just a chill girl who loves me.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 08:40 PM
–

I’m not sure what you mean by this
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 01:00 PM
30

Oh I would feel completely humiliated if my wife had to mother me. I’m an adult. She does support me and take care of me, just as I do her. But thats a different thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 12:57 PM
18

Yeah, this is true. I think dating has also shifted to discuss those things much earlier on and have less tolerance for diverging opinions. There are more politically mixed couples in their 50s and 60s than there would be today, but I think that's because the political parties have drifted further and further apart as well. I'm of the mind that this is a good thing—realizing you disagree on fundamentals when you're already married would be a huge mindfuck.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 05:14 PM
–

I don’t need a “committed” platonic partnership. When I’ve been single, I’ve just had regular friends. And yes; that helps quite a bit.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 03:28 PM
1

Nah, just talking about my experiences witnessing people who are coming across as desperate. It only takes a few minutes, not anything repeated. That desperate energy is a massive turnoff for everyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 11:40 PM
1

I mean, I disagree. Desperate energy is desperate energy. And it's all a turnoff. I've always thought that about the girls I see who are being obvious, same as the men. It's insecure behavior that reeks of desperation.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 11:24 PM
0

Okay, but the solution is to stop doing that. Like I don't have any better advice. Stop doing that. Stop putting it on a pedestal. Stop it. You're making yourself miserable. You are the one doing that to yourself. It is within your control to stop being miserable. I think it's just silly to go around in circles as though this is a problem anyone outside of them can solve. Learn how to be happy without female validation, I don't know.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 10:36 PM
–

Yikes.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 09:20 PM
0

"Whatever means necessary" shouldn't be an option, full stop. It's wild, coercive language that suggests you don't care about consequences or consent—you'll take someone by force. No one will ever, ever, ever want to spend time around you if this is the way your thoughts get organized. The feelings you experience as "unworthy of love" can be helped again by connecting with others. You're looking at romantic relationships as the only avenue to self-worth, and believe me when I tell you that think…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 05:02 PM
0

No, the reason people put being in a relationship on such a high pedestal is because they buy the Hollywood/Instagram version of relationships, where all of your problems are solved as soon as someone agrees to be your girlfriend. If all you've ever known is loneliness, you need to learn how to make lower-stakes human connection first. With your family, with friends, with coworkers, neighbors, with literally whoever is near you. Your first connection shouldn't be, nor will it be, some ethereal b…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 03:54 PM
1

Nah. The desperate energy turns people off regardless of who it’s coming from. unless, like I said, you just want to boost your ego.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 12:51 PM
2

the women who go into spaces only in the hopes of finding a man come across just as desperate and off-putting as the men. Nobody enjoys that energy, unless you’re someone who just wants to boost your ego through their attention.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 05:21 AM
0

All right man, I hope you find the one woman who finds relentless negativity super sexy.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 01:08 AM
2

I suppose I just find it incredibly immature to view partnership as some kind of unattainable holy grail, or even something permanent. People break up all the time, people die, people get cheated on. We all deal with our own heartaches, even when they don't look exactly the same as someone else's. You shouldn't "fake" contentment while being single, you should literally strive to BE content. If you truly can't be happy without having a romantic partner, you straight up are not going to be a good…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 12:34 AM
0

And that makes sense. It can be lonely and frustrating to want something and not get it - whether that's a job or a partner or a living situation etc. Those are normal feelings.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 07:44 PM
10

“if a man makes it obvious he’s at a social activity just to get dates, he’s going to struggle” yeah; this is true for everyone. women who desperately hang around obviously waiting for men’s attention also rarely get taken seriously. the advice for men to live their lives and find a way to be happy single isn’t because magically you’ll get dates from that, it’s because being happy and confident and independent is attractive. and while you’re never guaranteed romantic success, you can actually ha…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 06:51 PM
1

Yeah that's fair.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 04:33 PM
10

Okay, but I really take issue with the idea of someone needing to "earn" kindness from me. Being kind is my default.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 04:28 PM
13

I mean unironically yes, I do think I'm better than people who use their life circumstances as an excuse to turn everything into a gender war. But it's not because I found a person to date, it's because I didn't let my loneliness turn me into a nasty person.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 04:26 PM
9

Yeah so I understand being single or lonely or frustrated, but the reality of life is that no one is going to come save you or hand you the life you want just because you wish for it really, really hard. I don't think anyone who is single is a loser, just like not everyone who is in a relationship is happy. Some married people are incredibly lonely, and a few of my single friends look very content with their situation. Stop caring what other people think. Find a way to enjoy your life even if th…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 01:11 PM
68

This depresses me. I'm absolutely a simp for my wife (though I don't like that word), but she's also a simp for me. Because we like each other. It's fun being nice to the person you love. I enjoy making her smile, making her feel loved. And guess what? She does the same. Every day I read things that make me sad about how some people are approaching the world.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 06:50 AM
–

I'm not gaslighting you with anything. I'm simply telling you that you have no other option than to disregard women who don't align with what you want and instead find ones who are. I understand that's frustrating and can take a while, but there quite literally is no other option.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 10:44 PM
2

Ah also, I don't think this conversation is super productive but I wanted to say that your point that "this is how the world works" is false. No civil rights were ever won by asking politely and catering to the ruling class. None. Plenty of white folks showed up for civil rights in the south, and I don't think it was because Malcolm X said they were all very good boys.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 02:40 PM
2

I don't have the same experience with feminists that you do. No one has ever suggested that's how they think, so that's not the belief system I'm espousing. I believe in civil rights. Some random woman being mean to me doesn't sway me off that any more than a random black guy cutting me off in traffic would. I work adjacent to a pretty large civil rights organization and interact with hardcore feminists all the time. None of them have ever once behaved in the way you're projecting onto them. It …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 02:30 PM
0

Again, we disagree. My belief system stays pretty firmly in tact regardless of how I'm treated. If I got petulant about someone being mean to me and allowed that to sway my belief system, it really wasn't much of a belief system in my opinion. You're also conflating individuals with a whole group. I'm not going to throw the baby out with the bathwater in terms of civil rights. That's holding peoples' rights hostage, dangling them like a carrot they'll receive if they behave. It's gross.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 01:38 PM
2

Yeah so again, I do understand the frustration if you're wanting to find a partner and are unable to. It sucks. My point is that demanding a woman change her behavior to bend to your will isn't really an option. So you can either continue looking for someone who aligns with you or try to find a way to enjoy your life without necessarily finding a partner. Or both!
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 01:33 PM
2

I can see what you're speaking about. Semantically I'd prefer if people labeled behavior as abusive rather than the person. I work with abuse victims daily and it's demonstrably more helpful to get them to see what behaviors are abusive rather than get them to condemn their partners as a whole. On the other hand, to counter what you're talking about with the "watering down," it's actually incredibly hard to get anyone in these situations to recognize they're being abused already. So I don't like…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 01:26 PM
7

But it's your only option though
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 05:02 AM
5

See, where you and I disagree is that my belief system doesn't require someone proving themselves worthy of my support.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 02:24 AM
6

But again, that literally is how it should be? We're not talking about a 10 year relationship being derailed by a sudden personality change. I've already said I understand the frustration because I do. But these conversations always seem to end in the same place, where someone wants what is, in my opinion, a preposterous amount of coddling for what is essentially a personality mismatch with someone you found attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 02:20 AM
26

I understand the frustration, but this is just objectively what you should do. I'm not sure what you think the other options would be.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 09:44 PM
9

Holy shit, it's a wild ride reading your comments! You sound so deeply, ridiculously miserable that it makes me genuinely worried. Despite what you believe or have been told, so many of us are out having fun with groups of people including men and women, and none of us insult each other like this. To say you employ logic (and attribute it to men only) while saying this stuff is so ironic that it'd be funny satire if it wasn't destroying your life.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 03:22 AM
10

I mean he's blatantly suggesting that a feminist movement would do better if the women weren't so uppity. That's not exactly something that implies "yay women's rights!"
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 03:03 AM
19

Yeah, I agree. I work with male victims all the time, and it's super insidious. I hate watching anyone try to pit the two against each other as if it's a man vs woman thing. Abusers of all stripes are manipulative and can be incredibly charming and skilled at making you second guess every instinct you have. We should all be better about lifting people out of those situations, not berating them for not knowing better.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 02:59 AM
22

Ah okay I understand. You have a conclusion you have reached and are now on the internet looking for an echo chamber to validate you and fluff your feelings. You want confirmation, not outside perspective. So here goes. From my understanding, you're extremely bitter that some girl rejected you in favor of a crazy dude that bites people. You feel more entitled to her time and affection because you assume you're a "Good Guy" who is just ugly. I'm here to tell you that I've only interacted with you…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 02:23 AM
20

I have no idea - but if you're being clocked, it's because you're clockable. If you're looking for advice on how to hide your sexism better, I don't really want to help you get better access to women so you can mistreat them. That's wild.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 02:18 AM
21

I can! You're being clocked as an ugly man who vents on reddit because you're bad at hiding your sexism. Like I said, being angry that women are sussing you out but not others isn't the good look you seem to believe it is.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 02:15 AM
4

Did you mean to respond to me? Because... that's the opposite of the point I'm making.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 02:13 AM
26

No it isn't though. Because plenty of men do, in fact, do this. You suggesting that you don't have any abusive men in your personal circle is the literal example of this. Thank you for demonstrating it so clearly. Women can sometimes tell, and sometimes they can't. But they can't tell the times they can't tell, which skews the results. If you're one of the ones being caught in the net, don't be upset that you hide your toxicity worse than more successful abusers. That's just crazy.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 01:58 AM
10

Well so I'm a man. And while I can absolutely be smug and superior, I advocate for both women's and men's issues every single day. I run a support group for male victims. You're welcome to contact me if you'd like to talk about how feminism and men's rights intersect.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 01:56 AM
92

So what's interesting to me about bringing up women falling for abusive men is that guys like you never understand that we fall for them also. Not romantically, obviously. But many, many abusive men have close circles of male friends who believe they're great guys, great husbands, great fathers. And they are not. Are we just big dumb dummies too? Do we only like having them as friends because they have chiseled jaws? Or is it maybe that you're misunderstanding how abuse happens? Lonely men are l…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 01:53 AM
2

I mean anyone with a decent high school education would be able to understand the point I'm making about you by doing so.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 01:41 AM
16

Well nothing about this post supports your assertion that you "support feminist movements," but let's say for argument's sake that you do. Which ones? Because I'm a decently far leftist and while I find plenty of people with similar politics pretty annoying, it's never once swayed me off what I believe. So do you really support feminist movements or do you only support women's rights when they're being nice to you?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 01:39 AM
1

Really? Then why don't they care about the "random unrelated crap"? If your whole goal is to fuck more women, why don't you just throw consent out the window? Or does it feel too crass to expose your motives so blatantly?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 01:31 AM
5

I don't really have to look at an internet sub to listen to what women say about men; that's the benefit of interacting with them in person. I guarantee you that they're actually pretty fine not being someone's physical type unless that guy starts throwing around insults or faces of disgust. You know, kind of like how we'd react if women did the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 01:21 AM
19

Hi! I also enjoy beginning interactions with a smug, combative energy. So my wife and I started dating and she had the expectation that we'd split bills. I was the one who had the expectation that I should pay. In our case, our "default" expectation differed. That's my point, and why I phrased it that way.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 01:20 AM
0

I mean if your true goal is to fuck more women, then why not be a rapist? That's certainly the easiest - don't have to worry about what that pesky woman thinks
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 01:14 AM
10

Just to chime in so you don't rest your entire argument on "hee haw women are dummies," most people think preferences are perfectly fine. What's NOT fine is someone calling someone names or berating them just because they don't fit their preference.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 01:02 AM
44

The default should be whatever two people agree to. When my wife and I started dating, we took turns paying until we found a kind of natural rhythm that fit with our budgets. This is always an interesting take to read, because people seem upset that someone would force them into a position when all you have to do is say "oh no thanks, that's not what I'm looking for." Like I understand that limits your options sometimes, but what else can you do?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 12:46 AM
3

I'm literally repeating you to you, so you're arguing with yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 04:30 AM
4

But it wasn't explicit at all. You said "Anyone who makes the conscious choice to drink signs up for the consequences of any bad decisions made" which is decidedly not excluding instances of sexual assault.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 03:48 AM
3

Except in many situations, it isn't just a guy or girl you wish you hadn't slept with. It's waking up realizing that someone raped you, which is a different ballgame.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 03:43 AM
6

It's cruel to imply that someone who made a decision to have a couple of drinks signs up to be raped.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 03:42 AM
11

I think you have a perception of feminists that isn't based in reality. Feminism as a whole ideology tends to take the idea of male sexual assault victims more seriously than your average man does. The feminist organization I'm adjacent to has an entire section dedicated to male victims. And frequently the only people I've seen making light of underage boys being preyed on by older female teachers is... men. The stigma is coming from inside the house.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 03:40 AM
5

"Anyone who makes the conscious choice to drink signs up for the consequences of any bad decisions made" I mean... this is just a wildly cruel thing to say.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 02:05 AM
27

I don't know who you are speaking to, but my impression of feminism is that they take a more nuanced view of alcohol impairment than you're giving them credit for, so I suppose I disagree with the premise you've introduced.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 01:46 AM
–

Also Viagra and Rogaine are kind of the classic examples
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/26 04:19 PM
–

I'm a man. You're so busy whining you can't even read.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/26 04:17 PM
2

no I just think you’re kind of sad. My wife provided more than her body as well. I’m not the same as you. I don’t pick women solely off their looks
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 04:25 PM
–

You’ve got a warped view of the world, man. My wife started dating me when I made very little. I did however have a good personality, so I could see how that would be hard for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 02:59 PM
0

You don’t see misogyny for the same reason that I don’t see the air I breathe. I don’t need to appeal to women. I’m married and this account is anonymous. I don’t think men have zero issues, but lots of you are hyper-fixated and aggressively sensitive to the idea that any woman anywhere could be more successful than you, and if she is she must be unfairly advantaged. I hate to tell you this, but sometimes you’re simply not as qualified as someone else, even if that person is a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 02:46 PM
5

Good argument! I‘d be emotional too if my entire worldview boiled down to whatever garbage a bunch of roided out grifters slurred out in between ads for creatine powders and ”alpha male” camps.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 12:27 PM
3

lol. truly lmao. lmfao, even.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 05:37 AM
11

Yikes. Yeah, I didn't remember offhand when the exact date was. That's so much worse than I remembered!
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 03:54 AM
12

You didn't come with a counterpoint. Why would I defend against a tantrum? Why would I engage with someone who, by their own admittance, won't read thoroughly?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 02:24 AM
10

It tracks that you wouldn't want to read a few paragraphs, yeah.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 01:12 AM
8

Oh I fully agree, it's just how I've seen the phenomenon you describe play out. It's very easily verifiable that the "trad wife" figure has not a ton of basis in reality outside of one generation of western countries who benefited from a huge post-war boom and hugely effective wealth and corporate tax economic policies. I think also sometimes people conflate it with the idea of the hunter vs. gatherer trope, which is just as easily debunked.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 12:33 AM
9

I think this might be informed by a lot of our upbringings. Like my grandmother worked for a while, but when my grandfather came home from WW2, she stayed home and had kids. lots of us stick to anecdotal evidence that ”feels right” to us, which makes it hard to have substantive conversations based on varying levels of actual knowledge over vibes.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 12:25 AM
6

Honestly man, this would've been less embarrassing for you if you just didn't respond at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 12:06 AM
3

Great arguments! Lol. Only addressed three things and none of them had substance.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 12:02 AM
–

I genuinely can't speak to a lot of knowledge between capitalism and feminism except that perhaps capitalists have used women entering the workforce as a way to devalue everyone's labor, but that's not the fault of the women I don't think. and to counter your second point, women are increasingly marrying men who make equal or less than them. And the number of SAHDs is increasing too. It's not the majority obviously, but those cultural shifts are real. And it's feminism making that happen, as wom…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 11:11 PM
–

Huh. I wouldn't trade lives with women for anything. I would, however, trade bank accounts with any of the billionaires who are implementing chaos machines to make sure we don't notice they're stealing all our money, land, opportunities, and future. Then I'd put the money back into our societies so we could all focus on just having a nice time.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 10:58 PM
7

The previous argument being... an opinion? Lol Begone little troll. Come back if you want to have an actual discussion.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 10:46 PM
19

I'm glad you asked! The gender pay gap is still very real. Just because you don't experience it doesn't mean it doesn't exist. Highly qualified women are still being shut out of C-suites and paid less than their male counterparts. Women's healthcare has been so under researched that we're just now discovering that treatments that were designed for men have led to disproportionately poor outcomes for women. This applies to Alzheimer's, dementia, and heart disease. Not to mention the complete lack…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 10:44 PM
11

That's not what demonstrated means. You can't just say your opinion and point at it and go, "Look! I demonstrated it!"
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 10:32 PM
12

No they aren't. Like at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 09:29 PM
17

EDIT: Bro even GOOGLING sex selective abortion the first few studies that come up all talk about how it's predominantly female fetuses being aborted. Like, nothing about you is ideologically consistent.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 07:35 PM
26

I suppose it makes people feel ickier, sure. But I've never seen an example of what you're talking about. I have however seen studies done of how many female babies were left to die in the elements after china enacted the one child policy, somehow a misogyny that you don't give a shit about at all. EDIT: Bro even GOOGLING sex selective abortion the first few studies that come up all talk about how it's predominantly female fetuses being aborted. Like, nothing about you is ideologically consisten…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 07:31 PM
14

I mean I disagree with the premise you introduced. I imagine you're talking about abortion, which I'm fully on board with. So sure, I don't think the two are even related.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 07:29 PM
29

Bro people have been killing female babies—actual babies—in china for a long time after the one child rule was policy.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 07:25 PM
34

I think feminists at this point aren’t trying to treat it at all. which is valid. I wouldn’t come near the people advocating revoking my personhood for anything. The idea that men are superior is rooted in the hatred of women. Like that’s the whole ball game.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 07:24 PM
38

“Your body my choice” has been the default for... ever. Y’all aren’t original, youre just weirdly proud of yourselves about it. I am a man. nothing you’re talking about has to do with being men. its definitely the behavior of rapists and supremacists though.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 07:20 PM
72

Truly a wild read. ”Old school misogyny” is absolutely rooted in the hatred of women. There was no such thing as marital rape I believe until the 1970s. No property ownership, no voting, forced marriage, literal ritual stonings still exist in some countries for women who get raped as they see it as “adultery.” Modern misogyny isn’t much better, in fact the way Gen Z boys have been shouting about how all women should be slaves actually makes me nostalgic for the 90s.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 06:57 PM
-1

this is too vague a comment to have any meaningful response to. What is it that you are arguing?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 04:34 PM
2

My wife and her friends soundly mock books like this, in addition to red pill nonsense, which is part of why we're all friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 01:45 PM
2

Oh, there's some success because some people are stupid. Both are manipulative and easily manipulated people fall for them. I never wanted to end up with someone I had to trick into liking me, so I don't find those methods particularly worthy of respect.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 01:18 PM
1

I think you're missing the point that many of us think both are stupid.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 01:09 PM
35

I never wanted to date a single mom, but it wasn't because I found them "used" or anything negative. I just didn't feel comfortable or confident to step into a pre-existing family in that way. I was intimidated by kids. I don't think there's anything wrong with that as a preference. I do have friends who are single parents, and I'm happy to help them in whatever way I can because I think it's nice to help people when they need it, regardless of whether they made bad decisions. Maybe it's because…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 01:04 PM
0

The government should be involved in making laws. That is its purpose.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 12:46 PM
8

I don't think you and I have the same understanding of what progressive leftists believe.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 04:05 AM
1

So you wouldn't be attracted to an egalitarian man why? An egalitarian man wouldn't have any "expect to satisfy" attitude because your relationship would be egalitarian.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 04:04 AM
6

I'm simply pointing out that your taste in men could be different than a woman's. Why don't you engage with that argument?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 04:02 AM
7

Implying, not inferring. And yeah, when you talk about how your preferences in men stack up against a woman's, you seem like you're attracted to men. Yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 03:17 AM
12

Honestly man, I just don't think we're going to see eye to eye. I'll never not look at a 40 year old man who wants to date a teenager with anything other than disgust.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 03:09 AM
8

Yeah, because you'd rather be fucked by a guy you don't see as an equal. I understand. I'm just suggesting that perhaps your taste in men is not the same as a woman's.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 03:06 AM
12

Well there might be some difference in your taste in men and women's taste in men, to be fair.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 03:02 AM
10

Well society does already draw a line. We say that 18 year olds are "legal" to consent to adult relationships. That's society's line, and it is respected. We even have the Romeo & Juliet law for people who are closer in age. What you're describing is a cultural attitude, which you can't really police. And culturally, people do think it's creepy when a 40 year old wants to date a teenager. And I can't say I disagree. Also, you do need to be conscious of power dynamics in a relationship, especiall…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 02:52 AM
8

Yeah, for sure. Like I said, I have definitely seen some internet brain say some wild things about pretty tame age differentials. My wife and I are around 7 years apart, which I think I might've found awkward if we met when she was 21 or 22, but we met when she was 28 and both of us had pretty similar lives already.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 02:45 AM
33

Honestly, I get a bad feeling every time I see a dude go out of his way to start a discourse about why it's okay to date younger woman. It's not that I think every age gap relationship is inherently evil, my own wife and I are a few years apart, but the way some guys come out of the woodwork to scream about why big age gaps are JUST FINE REALLY often feels suspect to me. That said, I've definitely seen people take the criticism a little too far and misunderstand what a power differential really …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 02:38 AM
9

The fuck? Yeah, those are two different thoughts. I am the one suggesting that red pill and mainstream are two different things for exactly this reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 02:13 AM
21

This isn't how I see mainstream discussions at all. In my interactions for red pill dudes, they seem like the ones believing that any success of a woman is at the expense of a man. Or that women's equality is why men are sad. The truth is that everyone is struggling at the moment. Everyone. Except the wealthy. And the truth is that women's spaces etc exist because women got together and organized them. Men are organizing their own spaces too - I'm part of a men's only group therapy to deal with …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 02:04 AM
1

No it isn't. I'm sorry if you lack the reading comprehension skills to understand that. I'm a man, I've been a single man, I'm empathetic to the feelings of not having something you want to have. Simultaneously, you should try to find ways to enjoy your life whilst not having that thing so that your entire life isn't wasted while you sit at home and complain.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 08:30 PM
1

My comments are all pretty empathetic. I'm not sure how much more bending over you want me to do to accommodate the sad feelings of single men. I'm not making a request of anyone. I'm simply suggesting that expanding your world to more than just a single-goal mindset might make you a little happier than stewing in your misery about the perceived unfairness of your situation. "It's akin to telling someone with an opioid addiction that they should just try not doing opioids." - Excuse me while I d…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 09:33 PM
0

Yeah I understand how that works. But ironically those same guys tend to shift towards red pill bros and then get even more whiny. Which is interesting. I think because they're still focused on one goal, and when I suggest figuring something else out I mean maybe widening your life focus instead of doubling down harder.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 02:58 PM
5

Agreed. You are being annoying.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/26 09:44 PM
2

Huh? I just said it's okay to complain when things aren't going your way. It's human. All of us do it. Just maybe don't sit in it so much that it destroys your life.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/26 07:54 PM
27

So just in general I think it's okay to complain when you feel like something you want isn't attainable for you. But yeah, if at a certain point what you're trying isn't working, you have to figure something else out. Otherwise you get stuck in a little pocket of misery where you're voluntarily wasting years your life talking about how shit your life is.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/26 03:10 PM
2

In a way, sure. But it's also a gap of care, socialization, and the fact that we can just orgasm with a lot less time and effort.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 01:04 AM
14

I don't know, man. I met my wife through friends of mine and just had normal conversations with her until it started turning flirty. There really wasn't a lot of "approaching" involved. We just got along great.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 01:00 AM
1

I’m saying what I said, which is that you haven’t done a good job giving examples of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 11:48 PM
1

But you haven’t done a good job giving examples
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 11:44 PM
1

But it’s sexism by you, a man. Like I personally stop for everybody because it’s nice, regardless of whether I think they have it handled. You’re the one choosing to do that and engage in that behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 10:39 PM
1

So what you’re presenting has a lot of nuance. If a woman expects a man to be a provider, I’m assuming they’re in some sort of SAHM situation. In which, yeah, you’re kind of a dick if you control spending to the degree that you consider it “your money.” Women who expect men to “protect them” usually mean they want a man who makes them feel safe. Arguably those aren’t the types of people to start conflicts anyway. My wife likes that I have “protector” vibes, but it’s because I’m good at deescalat…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 10:37 PM
1

And again I say, like what?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 07:34 PM
1

That's not sexism. I stop to help people change tires all the time because I like being helpful.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 07:33 PM
6

Most of these sound like plenty of women I have dated, so sure. Except you'd have to more clearly define "likes benevolent sexism" and the "personality of a modern feminist"
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 03:24 PM
2

I’m not assuming. The way you speak about relationships is what shows me your view is warped. “The best you can do” isn’t a real thing. It’s a concept created in the minds of people who see relationships through a lens of competition and status. It makes me incredibly sorry to see.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 07:21 PM
2

See, this is where you trap yourself in a prison of your own making. They're marrying people who they love and want to live with. Until you actually learn to understand how to relate to people on an intimate level, you'll always exist in this pseudoscientific misery cage where everyone is concerned with value and status. I don't envy that.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 05:24 PM
2

Yes, that's true. So how does that mesh with the idea that somehow women are unhappy about this? They're marrying those guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 02:03 PM
2

What are you hoping to achieve with this comment?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 02:02 PM
4

Yeah I've read a couple, and I'm still pretty firm in my first points.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 06:28 AM
23

So I really don't agree with any of your premise. I don't complain about men today not "keeping up," that seems like more of a red pill complaint? I don't think about the "status" of other men like that. Most women I see complaining about men are complaining that men are swinging hard to the right and starting WhatsApp groups to try and repeal the 19th Amendment, not that they're ugly or poor.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 06:13 AM
11

So just to chime in, the only person to blame for shitty behavior is the person doing the shitty behavior. Women often say they can tell when someone is a misogynist/narcissist when... they can tell. They can't tell when they can't tell, which skews the results of their ability to tell. You're condemning them for avoiding men they have noticed exhibit sexist/narcissistic traits while not catching EVERY sexist/narcissist. They're trying to choose better and then somehow get hammered for it when a…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 03:40 AM
8

No I understood, I just wanted to give my two cents on why the foundation of discussions around red flags usually go nowhere.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 01:41 AM
16

I mean sure, but that shouldn’t mean they deserve poor treatment.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 01:38 AM
55

Not really directed at OP, but I think people willfully misunderstand when talking about red flags. The truth is that some people are horrible at hiding them (or proudly wear them) and some people bury them very deeply.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 11:34 PM
6

Sorry, are you suggesting that it's women who are pushing more for this lifestyle? Because that's laughable. "Trad wife" influencers are the only women saying this is good for women, and they're only saying that. They don't live it. They're millionaires in their own right and often out earn their husbands 5:1.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 01:48 PM
11

No man has ever been fired for simply existing as a man.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 06:05 AM
1

I think some issues get framed that way, yeah. But I don’t think they should. I think angry people on the internet usually aren’t the best at having long, nuanced conversations about how systems impact people differently, various ways to mitigate harm, and what can/should be legislated or considered a legal right and why.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 05:56 AM
–

Met her through friends. We were friends for a few months before I asked her if she wanted to go on a date. Went on a date. Kept talking and hanging out. She moved in with me. More dates. We got married.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 07:52 AM
6

That’s not always true. My wife watches more porn than I do.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 10:24 PM
–

And yet depending on their belief systems, they’re not necessarily feminists. Which is my point.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 03:41 PM
–

Fun fact, not all women are feminists. Some of them are deeply conservative and just as committed to the patriarchy and regression as right wing men.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 03:34 PM
–

I agree that anyone can call themselves a feminist, yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 03:28 PM
–

The right wing party in India is not more feminist than the left wing.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 03:24 PM
-2

"Right wing feminism" lol
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 03:10 PM
–

Thank you for reminding me. An unrelenting belief that you are the world’s biggest and only victim will also put people off.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 04:34 AM
–

I agree that many people seem to have some level of body dysmorphia in terms of their attractiveness too. Most of us look perfectly fine.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 03:56 AM
–

Low self-confidence and a negative attitude can torpedo even the most hourglass of figures and sharpest of jawlines.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 03:46 AM
1

I did. And it's a lot of pseudoscience nonsense. But good luck.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/26 12:28 AM
-1

But... that doesn't matter? Like, you can have complaints about the education system and whether they are biased or whatever. That's irrelevant to the point that women are outpacing men in terms of the educational outcomes they are receiving. More of them have college degrees, master's degrees, doctorates. And more single women are buying homes than single men.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/26 12:16 AM
1

"Ask any AI" Come on now. We now don't just have a difference of opinion, we have a foundational difference of morality. Also, that article notes that men push that just as much as women, if not more. In the first note, the woman said she received pushback for offering to pay. So even in your own example, men are just as to blame for upholding the system you're blaming on "greedy women." As for me, my first date with my wife was free and our second we split the bill. None of my friends uphold wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 10:54 PM
-3

Yeah. I have actually grown up without really ever hearing women say they wanted to marry a doctor or a lawyer. You might've grown up in some super conservative area, but that isn't what the girls I grew up with were saying. I'm sure it does happen, but it's never been something I've seen in any remarkable way. What I have seen is women who want someone who is in a similar place as them. It's not women who own homes looking for men who own mansions; it's women who own homes looking for men with …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 10:15 PM
28

Yeah, I mean this reads very much like AI but generally the idea that life is messy and rarely fair and systemic problems and solutions can't be boiled down into one sentence is correct.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 10:04 PM
3

I mean that's demonstrably not true. The trend of men being the breadwinners has been trending down since the 70s, and women have been trending up. They're still absolutely the minority of breadwinners for one-income households, but a big reason why so many people are single today isn't that women want wealthy men, it's that women aren't dependent on men for buying homes or having credit cards anymore. And if all you're offering to them is money and poor treatment, then yeah they don't care to d…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 09:37 PM
2

No they don't, though. Not in the US right at this moment. Women are statistically outpacing men in lots of metrics, including home ownership and college degrees. The idea that women are still "gold digging" right now is ludicrous. If by "jester" you mean they expect you to be nice to them, then yeah. If you don't want to do that, then you shouldn't be in a relationship anyway. Why would you want to be?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 09:14 PM
2

Great - so if you know for sure that women are the miserable ones and men are all stoically loving being single, then what are you whining about?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 01:45 PM
1

So I do not have a dog in the fight of "who's happier," that's not something I care about. Contact the news and ask for a retraction if you're so hurt that they assumed you were lonely based on the self-reports of loneliness. This whole sub revolves around men who are angry about being single and why. Anecdotally, I do find it a little funny that it's men who have such a huge reaction to the suggestion. RIP my notifications every time it gets brought up.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 01:04 PM
1

I have no skin in the game on whether women are legitimately happier than men about being single. I don't know. I don't know every woman and every man. But it's the men self-reporting that they're unhappy about being single and the women self-reporting being single by choice, so take it up with those people if you're upset about the conclusions being drawn from the data.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 12:57 PM
6

Right, so first of all I don't think women are trying to change your mind. They're trying to suggest that the way you speak is misogynistic, and if you want to be a likable person, you probably shouldn't say those things. And second, you're assuming that women "cry misogyny," which is a little silly given that the alternative is just that you're not recognizing when you're being misogynistic. It's very similar to right wing people pretending that everyone's "making things about race" when often.…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 04:47 AM
–

I'm saying what I said. I'm not sure there's reason for further debate because I find your premise flawed and not built on a foundation that merits a debate.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 04:30 AM
–

I understood what they were saying. It's not a personal attack. I very clearly say that my response to the concern is not the reasons you gave, it's that I think you (the general people who believe this) are insecure and a little lacking in critical thinking. Then they came in and made it clear they considered that observation an attack on them personally, which is certainly their prerogative, but is a bit oversensitive in my opinion.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 04:30 AM
4

It's what your quotes say. I don't have TikTok, I'm an adult man.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 12:41 AM
15

Again, they're framing it that way because most women are reporting that they're single by choice. The men are reporting that they're single and unhappy about it. This framing is a result of self-reported feelings. Like, I'm not sure what you want these outlets to do. Reframe it as "women are failing to recognize they should be more desperate for boyfriends, and men are wildly successful at having lives they're unsatisfied by"?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 12:33 AM
6

I've already seen in your other comments that you think a dude could say some truly heinous shit and because he'd "be correct" it's somehow not misogyny. You are not a good arbiter of what that word means.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 12:16 AM
12

Yeah they're presenting it that way because there's nothing in that sentence to blame women for, nothing they're failing at. They are fine being single, so I'm not sure why it'd be framed as a failure. Men are framing their singledom as something they wish to change, so it makes sense that the onus would be on men to change our situation if we're the ones wanting our situation to change. And none of those quotes said anything about laziness, entitlement, desperation, or used the word incel. And …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 12:07 AM
16

So I think this is a difference in communication style from men and women on the internet. From what I've seen, what women try to say is that physical looks aren't the end-all, be-all of attraction. Which is true. And what men tend to hear that as their insecurities around their looks being invalidated. I think this leads to a lot of miscommunication and aggressive lashing out. It's true that there are conventional standards of beauty for everyone, men and women. And that's not fun for anybody, …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 12:03 AM
2

It happens when the men exhibit poor character in the way they vent about it, yeah. As is a natural consequence of word choice and beliefs.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 11:58 PM
8

Yeah, because the way they're venting about it is misogynistic. I've never, ever, ever in my life seen a post where a guy has just casually talked about being disappointed with being single and feeling lonely followed up by comments berating him for being a misogynist. And women are so frequently told they're single because of their toxic worldviews. It's a topic on here like every other day. You're seeing what you want to see because you've already decided on what you think and are trying to wo…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 11:50 PM
15

Again, I disagree with your premise. The internet is demonstrably NOT where people are most honest. It is where people go to farm engagement, to rile people up to bump their advertising dollars, and where they sell their worldview based on the problems they are trying to convince you exist. It is a place of dishonesty and marketing first and foremost. It is not a place of honesty, and you're trying to build an argument on a flawed logic. The conversations that do happen where the onus is shifted…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 11:40 PM
19

I don't completely agree with your original premise. I think most people see single people as regular people, and most of us are capable of understanding that relationship status changes all the time. I'm not suggesting it never happens—the stigma of being single, especially after a certain age, can be very real. But I feel like this phenomenon is much more on the internet than in real life. I have seen men get labeled as misogynists or entitled or insecure on the internet when complaining about…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 11:22 PM
–

Thanks!
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 10:06 PM
–

Yeah, I don't want men to miss the forest for the trees in terms of relationship satisfaction. It is unlikely that my wife and I will ever recreate most or any of our sexual experiences with our previous partners for lots of reasons. And that's fine. I don't want that, and I don't even know all the gritty details of her sex life because I've never asked. I don't give a shit. I like our sex life. I don't need to know what she did with whoever ten years ago just to make sure she "likes me the same…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 09:18 PM
–

And yet clearly you have taken it personally. Interesting.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 08:52 PM
–

I think what you're looking for is a simplified answer to a nuanced question, which is kind of my whole issue with the premise you've introduced. You're operating on an assumption that you're presenting as fact. That's not a logical way to do much of anything.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 08:47 PM
–

You came here to this comment outing yourself as someone who took it personally. Who forced you to do that?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 08:40 PM
–

That's not my response to this concern. My response is that you're insecure and frankly a little lacking in critical thinking. Your "if the answer is" section is the vast majority of situations. It seems like you're now moving the goalposts to presume that every long-term relationship is some version of a woman settling down for a man who makes them feel safe, but who they don't really lust after. And as someone in a long-term relationship, what you're probably seeing is that the huge, intense, …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 08:20 PM
27

So like most things in this group, there's lots of nuance missing. Yes, it's in your best interest to protect yourself from perceived threats. Most of us do that already; it's the rare person who wakes up in the morning looking for someone to do them harm. However, I'd argue you are the one reframing this as an attack on men. Suggesting it's the rapist's fault for raping isn't engaging in victimhood, it's factual. Suggesting it's the cheater's fault for cheating is factual. Misleading people int…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/26 05:59 PM
5

You have again missed the point, which is that men are using these terms to hurt other men. And the attitude that you take, that somehow you shouldn't be kind and treat people well, especially a person you hope to build a relationship with, is toxic. It's what leads to an unrelentingly lonely life. It dooms you to unhappiness no matter what your situation is - single, partnered, married etc. You're carving out a hole within yourself that nothing and no one will ever be able to fill. The men who …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/26 02:22 AM
6

Our point is that men are, by and large, the ones using this language in a derogatory way toward other men. If your wife cheats on you, by all means be angry at her. But the labeling of a man as a "simp" because he enjoys being kind to his girlfriend is a male invention. The call is coming from inside the house on that one.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 03:30 PM
3

There's a particular kind of sadness that comes from trapping yourself in a prison of your own making, and it's something I wish I was able to help more men escape.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 02:45 AM
10

You're absolutely entitled to feel how you feel. I personally believe it's a little juvenile to demand no one and nothing change from when you were a child.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 12:43 AM
7

Agreed. In general, wealthy people would love it if you kept your focus on how mean women are and less on how rich people are stealing our futures.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 12:40 AM
9

I think you have a very strange view of women, and not one that's backed up by reality. It likely feels very lonely to see the world through your eyes, and I'm sorry for that.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 12:12 AM
2

I knew what they were saying, and it seems like others understood what I was saying. I simply have no interest in debating someone with poor comprehension skills, whether or not it's intentional.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 12:01 AM
11

I work in education, and while I frequently hear the boys calling each other "cucks" and "simps," I have never heard the girls use it at all, let alone as an insult. It's just not in their vocabulary the same way.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/26 11:57 PM
9

Seems like you're committed to twisting words and willfully misunderstanding. Can't do much with that, thanks though.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/26 10:25 PM
10

Take a deep breath and read the words that I wrote.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/26 10:16 PM
38

You should be with someone who treats you well and makes you happy. That's true no matter what gender you are or who you date. And arguably you're not really a nice person if you change how you treat people based on their level of perceived attractiveness or social status. The rest of it, the weird clinging onto people's past... Well, I'm fairly convinced that's the attitude taken by younger people who haven't yet experienced how fundamentally the years can change you.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/26 10:10 PM
0

I don't really believe that, but I suppose if your solution is to remain miserable then there's very little anyone can do to stop you. Enjoy it, mate.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 05:32 PM
1

Not to beat a dead horse, but therapy could actually help a lot with whatever is trapping you in this headspace.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 05:08 AM
2

I mean, that’s what conservatives say all the time about anyone who’s poor or oppressed.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/26 05:40 AM
3

This is the whiniest post I’ve seen in a while. Kudos.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/26 05:38 AM
–

One of my closest friends is 5'5 and he has always gotten more girls than me. People definitely don't make fun of him, but that's probably more because he's likable and charismatic.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/26 03:24 PM
5

Feminists don't really appeal to men for equality. Not on a structural level, at least. Most rights that women have won, they had to fight for. It's similar with every civil rights struggle. Dominant social classes don't tend to just give up power—they do however tend to ignore or underestimate how much the minority groups are being mistreated, which is kind of what's happening here. The fact that equality can be revoked at any time, as you suggest, is why feminism is still important. Because ye…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 05:15 AM
1

Multiple times I've said that everyone can do whatever they like and hold anyone to whatever standards they like. Thankfully my wife doesn't begrudge me any of my past mistakes. But substance abuse and fucking random guys in a club toilet do actually coincide quite frequently, for what it's worth.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 11:08 PM
1

Again, everyone can do life the way they'd like to do it. But I'm a recovering addict so I see the world a little bit differently. There are quite a few people in my circle who have things in their past they're embarrassed of or wish they hadn't done. No one is required to date any of us of course, and that's perfectly fine. It's not for everybody. But it's actually really fun for me to watch the people I love get their lives together and turn things around. My point is that a judgmental attitud…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 10:45 PM
1

It's not standards sabotaging your chances at a relationship, it's the negative attitude towards anyone who isn't a perfect person (ie. everyone). It'd be silly to conflate the two.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 05:30 PM
2

Their boyfriends and husbands, I assume.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 01:53 PM
0

That's a lot of separate questions. Did you want me to write an essay or do you have a specific thing you'd like to drill down on?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 01:51 PM
1

Interesting, that's exactly what my circle is like as well and none of the women behave like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 01:34 PM
5

Obviously you can do your life the way that works for you, but the rigid expectation that no one ever change or grow or make mistakes feels like it would sabotage any kind of relationship, platonic or romantic.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 01:11 PM
52

Like with anything, what "relationship material" is to you will be completely different for another person.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 11:23 PM
3

Not saying you're wrong, but this holds true for both groups.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 11:21 PM
–

That’s a great one! Hadn’t heard that before
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 11:04 PM
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I can understand that. It’s really difficult after experiencing betrayal. Building trust with people is difficult on its own even if you haven’t been fucked with. I hope you’re being gentle with yourself. Don’t let assholes from your past mess with your future.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 10:54 PM
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That would make sense. And to be fair, no one likes negative emotions or difficult experiences. But building resilience is important for all sorts of things, not just dating. Rejection will find you in so many areas of life, unfortunately.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 10:52 PM
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Actually no. I pointed out how your post reads and could be perceived, and now you’re turning it personal.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 10:37 PM
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At first I just took a break from dating and spent time with my friends. Having reminders that not everyone is out to get me was very helpful, and they were surprisingly good about keeping me grounded and lifting my spirits. I shared bits of my feelings at a time with them, and it helped me remember people can be trustworthy. I retreated back into my roots a bit with hobbies I’d left behind and found a therapist. I deleted all my social media (except Reddit obviously) because comparing myself to…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 10:30 PM
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Using language like “scarcity,” “commodity,” “thrown” (throne), “compete,” “outpace,” “raising the price.” String sentences like you did together, and the implications are that you are fighting against some perceived opposition instead of engaging in human relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 10:21 PM
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Nothing in this response suggests that you read my comment.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 10:16 PM
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Heartbreak is experienced by lots of people and definitely can traumatize you or affect the rest of your life. But it’s your choice on how to handle it. I worked really hard to move past mine. The only other option was letting it ruin my life.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 10:11 PM
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I mean I met my wife 4 years ago, so it’s not like I was dating in the 60s.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 10:10 PM
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Your post has a really combative tone, as though you can “win” dating. Especially as a gender vs gender idea.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 10:09 PM
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I mean there’s no arbiter of life dictating rules for experiences, but I remain confused why you would choose to take a combative stance toward something that could be fun instead.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 09:12 PM
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It’s a bummer to watch younger generations look at dating in such a combative way. It’s supposed to be fun getting to know new people, occasionally heartbreaking of course, but for the most part it’s a time to explore what you want your life to look like and see who wants similar things.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 09:00 PM
1

It seems like the only one here spoiling for an argument is you. You came in hot with some pretty derogatory things, and have now made up a reaction to get preemptively upset about. How's your blood pressure, man?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 03:34 AM
1

That's not what reactionary means. But sure, I was reacting to a post that asked for a debate and then discussed my view on what he said, point by point. There was so much more to the post than disparity of pay in sports, and even in my comment I said it's an argument I've seen, not one I employ. I also said it's not as relevant. I'm not sure why you're harping on it so much, but what I said was pretty mild.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/25 05:37 PM
1

I wrote two sentences before you crashed out. "That hasn't been true for me at all, but all righty." and "That's a weird little strawman." You're very sensitive.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/25 02:48 PM
1

Lol all I said was that hasn't been my experience. You've decided to take it as sensitively as possible as though it was an attack against you personally. That's delusion.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/25 02:35 PM
19

I'm not sure what you're even talking about. I don't think too many of us would argue that all of us uphold the patriarchy in some way, that's why it's actual work to dismantle it. Otherwise it'd be like a Michael Scott moment where we all just stand up and yell, "I am done upholding the patriarchy!" Women who aren't interested in traditional roles do tend to end up with men who similarly don't give a shit about it. I'm so confused about what you're saying.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/25 01:24 PM
39

Bro, men straight up broke into the Capitol when Trump lost carrying zip-ties and peeing on some of the country's most sacred spaces. Have you seen how men react when they're rejected romantically? There's a whole subreddit that shares headlines about men straight up murdering the women who don't want to date them. And now you're here whining about women whining.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/25 01:20 PM
0

That's a weird little strawman.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/25 12:55 PM
1

You are conflating women with feminists. Shaming people for not having sex isn't a feminist principle.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/25 12:55 PM
2

I don't think most feminists would even disagree with that statement. What they tend to get bent out of shape about is men who get in their faces and scream that because they're women, they must be weak. Or the weirdos who go around talking about how they could beat Serena Williams in a tennis match.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/25 12:54 PM
1

I mean for what it's worth, most of my friends who identify as feminists would probably agree with you. They're as angry as anyone about the weird co-opting of the word. But yeah, no words seem to mean anything anymore. Everyone's taking it for their own shit.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/25 12:52 PM
2

Yeah, the label of incel has completely transcended its original meaning though. It was co-opted by the blackpill dudes who wanted to chat online about how to take away rights from women. Usually when that insult's used, it's because you're being misogynistic. The original "incel" was a woman anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/25 12:51 PM
1

I love it. Nowhere in my comment was I scolding anyone, but you came in to call me names regardless. Of course it's deeper than supply and demand. How you market things matters, the money people put into the NBA dwarfs the money they put into the WNBA to begin with, and yet still the WNBA is selling out games because of Caitlin Clark etc. The women's soccer team where I'm from dominates the men's in viewership and ticket sales, but they're still paid less. It's not a simple issue, but to shut it…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/25 12:48 PM
5

Hey so did you deliberately misunderstand what I said immediately after that when I said "But sure, there's an argument to be made there that supply and demand have a definite effect on pay" and gleefully move to comment when you thought you had me trapped in a gotcha, completely ignoring the rest of what I said?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 06:03 PM
15

Yeah, feminists don't virgin shame. He's thinking of women as a whole. Feminism also has, as a core principle, a deep dedication to workers' rights which also benefit men. For example, feminism would reject the socialization that has led to men taking the dangerous jobs as well as fight for rights that would make those jobs safer. Feminist women aren't complaining about gender roles so much as fighting back against the expectation of them. Most feminist women I know are fine to split costs or ev…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 05:56 PM
4

I thought it was obvious from what I said—that his description hasn't been true for me. And if it hasn't been true for me, then romance can't "literally" only be what men give and women receive.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 05:44 PM
1

That hasn't been true for me at all, but all righty.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 04:28 PM
1

Then get some. No one's going to pick the lock on your door, find you in your bedroom, and befriend you by themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 02:16 AM
1

Well number one, you don't know me. But you do seem to enjoy making snap judgments about people, which I'll go ahead and tell you is something that will hinder your ability to make friends. Two, social skills are learned for everyone. Learn them. Three, social anxiety is an issue millions of people have. It sucks. It's hard to overcome. One way to overcome it is to face it head-on. Is it fair that you might have to try harder than others? No. Is life full of unfair scenarios? Absolutely. What's …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 02:09 AM
1

Yeah, if you don't have friends then make some friends. Making friends would actually very easily solve your loneliness. But you've allowed your loneliness to turn you bitter and angry, which does make it harder to make friends. Stop the cycle.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 01:04 AM
2

Then you should be reaching out to those guys and befriending them to solve the issue you're complaining about.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 10:53 PM
3

Yeah, we're agreeing. The guy you responded to saying "men like you put women's feelings over everything else" was the ironic attack I was pointing out. But good to know all of us are crushing it with trying to band together.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 10:50 PM
2

Hear me out. You could make friends. Be the solution you'd like to see in the world.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 10:43 PM
12

Yeah, but ironically then Clutterboxx had to respond by tearing his fellow man down. Definitely not proving the point at all. Edited for clarity.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 10:42 PM
4

I mean I'm engaged, but I'm just telling you why your premise is flawed.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 09:34 PM
7

Because plenty of women have seen bad marriages, shitty dudes, and lazy husbands. The question isn't, "Why wouldn't women want to be in love with an awesome guy forever?" It's really more, "Why would women want to risk marrying someone who won't do chores, doesn't make them orgasm, wastes money on OnlyFans and sports betting, only ever sometimes "babysits" the kids, and then votes against women's rights?" Men blindly following anti-intellectualism and taking a hard political right at alarming ra…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 09:14 PM
–

Dude, learn reading comprehension.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/25 06:34 PM
7

I think men who think like this are almost giving women too much credit, in a way. Attributing all these perceived slights as though they're planned out in an evil lair, designed to hurt men. They're human beings just like we are, and we do the same kinds of things (as we're both human people!). Sometimes behavior is inconsistent. Sometimes we make mistakes. We can be cruel, either intentionally or unintentionally. Also, we often change as we respond to experiences, learn new things, or have new…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/25 02:27 PM
1

It's really sad that you think that. I must be hotter than I thought, since my fiancée has made more money than me for most of our relationship!
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/25 01:08 PM
5

It really is, though. Because I've seen the people many blackpill/redpill/incels view as "ugly," and most of them look average to good. (Including themselves).
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/25 01:07 PM
1

I think you're taking the phrase "dating down" a little too personally. That's the colloquial term one of the articles used to designate the disparity between income and education, but it doesn't mean they're any less happy with those men.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/25 03:26 AM
1

There's actually been a few recent articles about how many women are "dating down" meaning they make more money and have more education than their male partners. I think you're working on some outdated information.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/25 12:57 AM
1

? Nothing I said suggests you should date people identical to you or that there's only one way to have a nice relationship. But focusing only on what others can do for you and not what you want your relationship to look like will make you old and bitter. Apropos of nothing, there's not much to suggest a majority of women are miserable being single at the moment.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/25 12:53 AM
37

Oh man, this really gets to the heart of the total misunderstanding lonely, single men have with reality. Attractiveness is subjective. Yes, we have our conventional ideals put up on pedestals in every culture, but in our everyday life so much goes into finding someone attractive. There is no one single way to be attractive, and plenty of people who you would apparently deem as "ugly" are falling in love, having sex, and spending their lives attracted to each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 11:44 PM
1

And I was responding to you, a person who said two people fucking.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 02:35 PM
1

You said two people fucking—that can be any arrangement. And yeah, I see the difference. Because in one example, a man is dating someone. And in the other, he's hoping a friend randomly turns around and sucks his dick for no reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 02:26 PM
0

Yeah look man, I can smell the Jordan Peterson on you.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 02:18 PM
2

Both of those things can grow, and it's worth noting that men also tend to get more involved/interested in their women's interests too. That's just what happens. You said "two people who enjoy fucking each other from the jump will find things to be compatible about." That isn't true. Plenty of people have one night stands or even casual hook-ups with people they do not ever want to spend time with outside of that. It's a weird cope I see guys do a lot that friendship/compatibility is the only th…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 02:10 PM
4

Well your premise is an assumption, so it's pretty flawed. I didn't say anything about not having mutual attraction and kindness. I said that if you're talking about relationships in terms of only how she'll treat you and what she'll do for you, you'll end up lonely. And you'll have brought it on yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 02:05 PM
2

You guys say things like this and then wonder why women are averse to you. "Relationships should enhance a person's life." Yeah, true. But you'll also deal with more things in a relationship than you would when you were single. There are more complications. Her family, her friends, her job. You both support each other, and sometimes that means your life is easier and sometimes it means you have to compromise and take on more. It's not a zero-sum, "my life is easier every single hour now that I h…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 02:04 PM
1

That simply isn't true though.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 01:58 PM
–

Snark can be sexist, sure. It can also not be sexist. In this case, he was being sexist regardless of your oddly rigid snark semantics. Which is why I called him ignorant. He didn't "match the same snark," he said two sexist things in a row, and escalated in the second comment. In the middle, I made a joke about how he'd lose his mind when he realized women invented things as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 04:36 AM
–

I love it when red pill bros conflate sexism with snark. It's so edgy that teenagers have been doing it for decades!
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 04:14 AM
–

If you're ever feeling lonely and wondering why, consider that it might have something to do with your incredible ability to be ignorant and rude simultaneously.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 02:50 AM
–

I work with young adults pretty often, and I see this type of thinking from everyone, but the boys in particular. To me, it's the natural conclusion of everything being "gamified." Whether that's video games, social media, dating apps, whatever. It's like we've taught everyone that there are logical steps to achieve things, when the reality of life is so messy, so complicated, and there are no roadmaps, rules, or winning.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 02:45 AM
–

Oh man, you are going to lose your freaking mind when you find out about everything women invented.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 02:41 AM
6

I don't think socializing with people who are similar to you is out of the norm. Most of my social circle would fit at least one of those criteria if not more, yeah. And all of us have similar social views. My advice for expanding your social circle? By... meeting new people. Go to work events. Go to networking events. Go out to small venue concerts or bars that aren't geared towards doing shots and dancing. Join a rec sports league. Volunteer somewhere. Ask your friends if you can tag along to …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 02:37 AM
42

All I get from that is you want a girl who can do things for you. A girl who makes you feel good. A girl who will suck your dick and bring you food. Nothing about what you want to find in a real relationship. Nothing about what qualities you'd value in a partner or what you want your life to look like together. You might speak for a lot of men, but if you do then I'm not surprised there's so many lonely men.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 01:37 AM
57

Takes like this make me so, so sad for the men who buy into it. Meeting people through your social circle isn't about hitting on your existing friends. It's about compatibility. Arguably the women who are adjacent to your life will have lots in common with you ie. career, income level, education, belief systems. Meeting people through people isn't about settling for who's closest geographically. It isn't about settling for the only five options you have available. That's why the advice is genera…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 01:24 AM
–

Well I guess, but we've never had that problem. I'm probably cleaner when I'm cooking now than when I was single just because I'd feel guilty if I left a huge mess for her to clean up.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/25 08:25 PM
–

I get that. It's the "handwash only" pots and pans I really despise.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/25 02:08 PM
–

I think this is a good way to do it. It's how I work with my fiancée, too. Unfortunately, we both really hate doing dishes so we try to adhere to the "I'll wash mine" rule, as well as "whoever cooked doesn't clean."
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/25 01:56 PM
3

I love that logic. It certainly always seems to work well for the first person doing a wrong. Feel free to report me to law enforcement for... Writing a comment on the internet. What a big, strong boy you are!
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/25 11:22 PM
4

Well first, child support in no way equals destroying your body permanently and undergoing a 9-month process that's torturous even if you want to go through with it. But second, no they don't. Men get away with paying no child support all the time. There are so many absentee fathers that see no repercussions ever.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/25 11:20 PM
2

I don't think any left-leaning people want there to be any punishment for abortion.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/25 09:18 PM
–

[ Removed by Reddit ]
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/25 09:03 PM
–

I mean, you're wrong. But the good news is we have a stockpile of abortion pills and can hand them out like candy! So DM me if anyone's carrying this asshole's kid and needs to get out of a bad situation. Congrats on throwing your lot in with people who think 10 year olds should be forced to give birth to a child rapist's baby.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/25 09:01 PM
17

And yet it's you and your friends who have ended up killing women through forced birth. PS guess what? Abortions are way up since the overturn. It's almost like people don't want to bring kids into a world where they don't get to make decisions about their own bodies.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/25 04:30 PM
15

And the end result is the revocation of someone's human rights. So... two birds?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/25 04:01 PM
–

But this isn't true. There's a certain type of guy who seems to chronically state that opinion, "your vetting system is based on the man's attractiveness" as though it's fact. But it's just your opinion. Leave alone the reality that "shy, not so confident" men can also be horrible boyfriends, and good-looking guys can be nice. It's so weird to hear other guys claim that shy and average men are the pinnacle of decency. Personalities aren't contingent on looks.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/25 12:18 AM
1

My point that... women can often tell when a guy is a piece of shit because some of you make it super obvious? No, you're making that point for me. By being a super obvious piece of shit.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 07:13 PM
1

"y'all just fucking suck at making decisions" — do you know what y'all means? Or is it too far above the 4th grade reading level you've achieved? Sorry, when men are the ones abandoning their kids and women are the ones sticking around to raise them, you kind of lose your moral high ground. Fun fact, the person who chooses to leave is the piece of shit.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 07:12 PM
0

Huh, and yet it's men who have abandoned their kids. I wonder who that reflects more poorly on.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 05:04 PM
2

Yeah the reality is that many men are doing some really scary shit to women today, and women are trying to weed them out as best they can. Suggesting that women stop trusting their friends because it’s somehow unfair to strangers is insane. The people close to you are more likely to hurt you as a matter of access. That’s why women are becoming so picky about who they let into their lives. The solution isn’t to demand they indiscriminately let everyone in or start mistrusting the people they’ve b…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 12:58 PM
2

I’m a man, you absolute moron. The amount of single moms proves that we have a lot of loser dudes out there.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 12:48 PM
3

Oh look, someone immediately proving my point.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 12:47 PM
14

It’s also worth noting that women can often tell when a guy is a piece of shit because some of you fools make it very obvious.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 04:56 AM
43

Okay first, many of us have female friends and aren’t harboring secret resentments that they haven’t sucked our dicks. Second, you start off by saying that women are wary of strangers but should ALSO be wary of their friends—then try to end by saying “women shouldn’t fear men just because they’re men.” Friend, you just said they should be more afraid of the men around them. Somehow it’s bad that they have built trust with their male friends? Third, it’s not a surface level analysis to assume the…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 04:44 AM
–

Except no, what you said isn't true. You throw out opinions and think they're facts.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 12:13 AM
–

I think your view of men is pretty sexist. I don't get up in my feelings when I see a random internet woman rant about men. But I'm also not super insecure. I feel like you've probably watched a lot of videos that tell you what women think of men instead of meeting and befriending women to see for yourself. Regardless, please don't lump me in with your idea of men. I'm not going to turn into a misogynist if someone hurts my feelings. Jesus that's pathetic. "Misandry is making it worse for women"…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/25 11:19 PM
–

Yikes.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/25 11:09 PM
30

I don’t know what you’re like in a relationship, but in mine the sex has gotten much better.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/25 01:39 PM
1

I mean people can do whatever they like, for sure. I personally have never found shallow relationships to be easy, they feel frustrating and unfulfilling to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/25 06:51 PM
3

I know there are a lot of men (particularly in this group, it seems) who are upset they can’t land the hot, shallow girls. But I don’t think there’s as much understanding of why you even want to date people like that. Or that plenty of other, non-shallow girls exist. If you’re being shallow, you’ll receive shallowness back. That goes for both the women going after men for only their looks or money, and the men here trying to find a way to trick those shallow women into dating them. You’re both t…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/25 01:56 PM
1

I think if this is how you handled that situation, you wouldn't be so aggressively bothered by it.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 11:13 PM
0

That's pretty petulant. If someone wants to be your friend and you want something more, then you're well within your rights to say, "Sorry, I can't be your friend. That's not what I want," and leave. No one's trapping you there. I like it when people want to be my friend because I enjoy having friends. I have plenty of female friends who I don't want to sleep with and I'm sure they don't want to sleep with me either. That's why we're friends and not dating. It's really not that hard. You can cer…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 10:07 PM
0

Yeah, I like my friends. If you don't like someone, then why would you want to be their friend? You're talking about someone who has a romantic interest in someone and is choosing to keep themselves in a situation that hurts them. Make your interest clear and accept the outcome of potential rejection or be quiet, honestly. Women aren't doing anything to you. You're just upset that they're not volunteering to fuck you in exchange for hovering in their vicinity.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 10:01 PM
-1

Because I like my friends, and I enjoy being friends with them. Why would I see someone wanting to be my friend as an insult?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 07:51 PM
4

Yeah, social interactions can get awkward and uncomfortable and often not be what we want. Bad friendships happen, bad relationships happen. Sometimes you can find someone at fault, and a lot of the time there are just misunderstandings and incompatibility. But I don't think this is gendered, at least not in the "women are using me for friendship" way. I think men often have a different understanding of friendships, and sometimes bring it on ourselves with the expectation that if we're emotional…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 07:36 PM
4

Sure, racist stereotypes definitely exist in lots of ways, and that's pretty fucking horrible. But women at large are socially conditioned to be wary of men at large, regardless of race. Edit: Oh, you edited your comment to remove, "It's my job to remind them of their microaggressions." Is that because even you knew you sounded like a pretty scary guy? It seems like you resent someone for an experience where they stereotyped you or viewed you as harmless, and now are using that as an excuse to p…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 07:31 PM
4

"I think it's because friendship is a loaded term that incorporates a lot of different kinds of relationships, many of which are emotionally limiting and stifling for the men involved with very little room for honest expression...Some guys end up being held in a kind of stasis where the women don't really invest in them as people, but enjoy the nonchallenging company and attention." Then stop being friends with them. Where is your agency, dude? If I feel limited and stifled, I simply remove myse…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 07:17 PM
8

I agree. I consider my fiancée to be my best friend. We'd be friends even if we weren't together, I think. What I do think is ridiculous is men who willingly enter into friendships with women and then resentfully pout as though she should just offer to fuck him as payment for him listening to her problems.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 07:13 PM
1

How? Edit: Good debate!
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 06:53 PM
5

You think society has drilled it into women's heads that men are harmless? Women are constantly told or shown accounts of men mistreating women, killing them, or assaulting them. Women don't think of us as harmless—they're wary as hell of male strangers. That's why I've always taken it as a compliment when women warm up to me and we can be friends. The way you talk is pretty concerning. "It's my job to remind them of their microaggressions"? Dude, I don't know what you've been watching, but you …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 06:31 PM
2

Yeah look, I'm not all of those women but from personal experience I'll tell you that a lot of the time that means they were part of their larger social circle or even that they just got to know each other slowly before starting to date. I think you're misunderstanding that context and twisting it into, "you should pretend to be their friends for years and then blindside them with anger that they never sucked your dick."
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 06:27 PM
12

Some men seem to see women befriending them as an insult, which has always been strange to me. I really enjoy having female friends, but everyone's different. Women vent to their friends—both female and male. If you don't want this to be your relationship, communicate that. Or stop being friends with them. If you want a relationship with them, then yeah, tell them that. But don't hang around pretending to be interested in friendship and then act surprised when they treat you like a friend. You'r…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 06:01 PM
4

That's such a funny talking point to me. So many men get away with not paying child support already. If I got someone pregnant and they didn't want to get an abortion, I'd be fine with paying for shit. I'd never want to be a deadbeat and genuinely would want to support a kid. But at the moment I'm in a committed relationship, so that's a given anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/25 10:15 PM
4

I'm pretty intensely pro-choice, so I think I'll continue doing what I'm doing.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/25 09:57 PM
-4

I’m pretty sure I’d have lots of sympathy for anyone forced to have a kid they didn’t want. Suggesting that sex should come with a punishment gives off very bitter energy.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/25 09:05 PM
6

Ah yes, because birth control never fails and people who are married never want to have sex for fun.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/25 04:33 PM
3

Me saying “agree to disagree” was the signal that I didn’t care about debating you.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/25 08:53 PM
4

Agree to disagree!
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/25 08:22 PM
2

I think the death of the third space and the increase in pricing absolutely does have an effect! Social media and comparison to perceived happiness of others also plays a part, I'm sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/25 08:00 PM
7

I feel for people who are in their early 20s right now, because life actually is more expensive than it was 10 years ago. My nights out at dive bars were fairly cheap in a way that I don’t believe is true today. However, I think some of what you touch on is correct. You don’t need to “crush it” socially or attend all these fancy events, but having a healthy social circle will inevitably offer you opportunities to meet men/women through friends or coworkers. There’s just no way around that. Don’t…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/25 04:15 PM
–

I don’t know man, I’m not trying to sleep with anyone except my fiancée and I’m still nice to people. If your behavior changes just because someone won’t fuck you, you’re probably not a super kind person.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 11:35 AM
0

Right after I posted this, you started using AI for your comments. If I wasn't convinced before...
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/25 03:01 AM
6

FWIW, reading through your comments on this post make it obvious that AI wrote this for you. That's fine, but I'm curious if you even understand what you're actually suggesting here.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/25 02:47 AM
4

Hey there
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/25 02:41 AM
–

Yeah, that question definitely doesn't come from insecurity at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 11:14 PM
3

My fiancée makes more money than I do. She always has, with a few spurts where I had some windfalls from publishing. She's not very materialistic, and we both think people driving Lambos or buying $50K watches are funny in a bad way. There are plenty of women out there who are not into conspicuous consumption or tacky luxury. That said, many women won't be interested in you if you're completely and chronically unemployed, in debt, and have no plans to dig yourself out. But that's most humans in …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 04:26 PM
–

Maybe, but that's just insecurity again. I could tell these guys I didn't really enjoy my random hookups until I'm blue in the face, but they still wouldn't believe me.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 02:31 PM
3

Yeah, that's what I think too. There seems to be a lot of people putting hookups on a pedestal while devaluing committed relationships. Some guy said it was because he wanted to feel "desired," but I never felt desired in one night stands. I feel way more desired by my fiancée than a random girl who only wanted to fuck me once and never talk to me again. It's odd to me, but I never enjoyed the casual dating scene.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 02:00 AM
15

No, it's not often one or the other. Men are just getting in their own way by saying, "if you've ever hopped into bed with a random guy and you don't do the same with me, it's a personal insult to me and also you're a bitch and a whore." My fiancée has had one night stands. So have I. We didn't sleep together the first night we met. Because we both wanted something more. Our sex life is awesome. We had pretty terrible, unfulfilling sex with people we never wanted to see again because we felt bad…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/25 07:00 PM
22

Essentially it seems like what you're saying is men are angry about dating dynamics because they're insecure. Thinking you're "below" a one night stand is sad. It's about what you value. I value my long-term relationship. I'd be really sad if all I got from her was one night of drunk sex, and I feel bad for any man experiencing the same. I guess I'm not sure what the argument is here. I'm engaged, and she does have a "feral attraction" with me. But she also wanted more with me. What a bummer for…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/25 06:38 PM
5

So this whole post is full of opinions stated as fact, but let me counter a few of them. "Many guys who label themselves as nice...have this false perception about themselves which hides the truth of they don't deserve that pretty girl they have a crush on." I'm a nice person. It's one of the compliments I get most, and I'd agree with it most of the time. I've never thought I "deserved" anyone, but I also never let my personality stop me from approaching women I was interested in. "Being nice to…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/25 01:49 PM
5

Abusers are absolutely not easy to spot. Some of them are, and some of them aren't. And what might look like red flags to you and me might not to others. Maybe they grew up with abusive parents and that behavior seems normal to them. Maybe they're from a high-control religious group where misogyny is praised. Maybe they're young and naive and excited about their first relationship. Maybe they're lonely, and this new person makes them feel special. Maybe they're disabled and have trouble understa…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/25 04:38 PM
2

That's not true, some of you are just obvious assholes.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/25 04:26 PM
1

Hahah all right, man.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/25 03:14 PM
3

Or, maybe, manipulative men are better at manipulation than men who have issues with social interactions. I wish some of you would just admit you're annoyed that abusive men get to hurt women. You're not interested in relationships, you just want the same opportunity to cause pain.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/25 03:10 PM
7

Because some men are very good at hiding their ulterior motives.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/25 02:40 PM
2

This was a week ago, but I felt compelled to come back and say that in no way does fertility = value. For anyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/25 02:37 PM
11

We've also completely forgotten the existence of anybody who isn't strictly straight and dating the opposite sex. Ideas like this always have forced selection as their natural conclusion.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 02:39 PM
1

I think there are definitely women who don't like it when their partners watch porn, and there are also women who don't like the more violent porn. And personally, neither do I. But yeah, I'd imagine there's an argument to be made that some women and feminists would like to tone down the super rough pornography. But that's more about the treatment of the women in those films rather than "porn=bad" as a whole, I think.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/25 11:22 PM
4

I really don't understand what you're saying with this, and it seems pretty irrelevant to what I'm arguing.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/25 10:03 PM
8

This is what I mean when I say you need to spend more time around average feminists. You're looking at people on the internet, browsing Reddit forums to satiate your confirmation bias about what you think feminism is. I just checked that sub and some of the most recent topics about porn involve a woman struggling with porn addiction, someone talking about their ex making AI porn of them, there's one upset that her partner subs to OF, and there's a post discussing how they feel the sub is being m…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/25 09:41 PM
11

Oh boy, lots of red pillers coming out of the woodwork to downvote this based on their extensive knowledge of modern feminism.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/25 09:16 PM
6

If she's anti-porn to that degree, she's at odds with the average feminist platform.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/25 08:58 PM
23

Really? Because my entire social circle is full of "average feminists" and many of them watch porn and/or don't give a shit about it one way or another. "Average feminists" tend to be the ones advocating for taking the stigma out of sex work and adding workplace protections. I'd consider spending time with average feminists instead of believing what the manosphere tells you about average feminists.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/25 08:52 PM
27

Porn isn't "male sexuality," holy shit. You're going to lose your fucking mind when you find out how many women watch porn and how many men hate it.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/25 08:41 PM
5

Holy shit, man. "Mary the Minge" probably thought she was too good for you because you seem like an asshole. I wouldn't let you within 100 feet of me, my family, or my friends. There are plenty of people, men and women, who never have children even if they wanted them desperately. Some are infertile, sometimes adoptions fall through, some don't have enough money. Some people have marriages and children and their children die from illnesses, their spouses from accidents. You seem insane. "A genet…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/25 04:43 PM
2

Well he blocked and ran, so I guess we're done discussing!
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/25 04:09 PM
5

It isn't, though. The post is mostly listing facts about the effects of paternal age on pregnancy. Men and women both deteriorate. And then we die. And the older we get, the more strain it puts on processes like pregnancy. You are not exempt from adverse pregnancy effects as a man. If you choose to procreate later in life, you will be putting the woman and the child at greater risk. If facts feel misandrist to you, you must have a difficult time navigating the world. I only wish we didn't need t…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/25 03:59 PM
9

I feel like you've misunderstood who I am and what I'm saying. It's not a "gotcha" to say that advanced paternal age leads to adverse outcomes in pregnancies. It's verifiably accurate. Older men who go after younger women are going to see adverse pregnancy effects due to the fact that they are older. But so would older women who conceive with younger men. Studies have shown that advanced age in both parents would lead to complications at higher rates than younger parents of comparable health. Pl…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/25 03:44 PM
14

Uh, plenty of people live in areas where they actually don't have the option of an abortion.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/25 03:34 PM
10

But the idea that "male-influenced factors are the ones who make or break a pregnancy" simply isn't true. The overall picture of both the mother and the father will contribute to the risks of a pregnancy. If you're setting up the debate to be, "the age of the male is what matters most to pregnancy outcome," then you're exactly the same as the misogynists who negate all evidence in the opposite direction. I'm not sure why you'd be hankering to align yourself with their style of rhetoric.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/25 03:24 PM
0

Are you even reading my comments? I said "trying to dunk on men or women for being old is a little played out." Because it is, either about procreation or not. And then I said "If you're going to have kids, be aware of the risks and potential outcomes due to your lifestyle, age, or health." I'm repeating it because it seems like you're skimming the things I'm saying and then misinterpreting them. All I wanted to know was what debate they were trying to set up.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/25 03:05 PM
7

But that's... what I just said? I said, "what is the debate" and you heard, "this is stupid and not worth discussing."
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/25 02:57 PM
12

What's the debate? Pregnancy complications, fertility, fetal development... it's all affected by age of both parents. Right? Trying to dunk on men or women for being old is a little played out. If you're going to have kids, be aware of the risks and potential outcomes due to your lifestyle, age, or health. Seems pretty straightforward.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/25 02:47 PM
2

Ah, well if we've reached the depths of siding with taking away votes for women, black people, and the poor then I'm going to be done interacting with you. Have a good one.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/25 01:29 AM
1

But it's not a contract, and you're not signing anything. It's a registry. That's my point. It's basically a database. Personally, I don't even think it's necessary because the government already knows who we all are and where we live and would come get us in the event of a draft. I've already said you can be against it in principle because of what it implies, I don't like it either, but you haven't lost anything by being in the registry. I'm not pro-draft; I just think any argument that starts …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 08:11 PM
1

Ah yes, the net positive contributions of the soldiers at Abu Ghraib. Until you're drafted, please sit down.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 05:21 PM
1

Okay, then to make your point valid we should revoke voting rights to every single person in America who has never been subject to the draft. What an odd election this will be, with only men ~75+ casting a ballot.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 04:45 PM
1

The fuck? Lol no, it isn't a forfeiture of your bodily autonomy. It's essentially a database. You can be up in arms at the principle of it I suppose, but the government already knows who you are and where to find you in the event of conscription.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 04:40 PM
1

Then let's also subject any man under 75 to the draft in order for them to be able to vote too? Like, I don't know what point you think you're making.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 04:37 PM
12

It's also stupid because there hasn't been a draft in about 50 years (if you're in America). It gets even dumber when you remember women make up almost 18% of military personnel right now. Women are already joining the military more than ever before, their numbers have been climbing over recent years.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 05:27 AM
–

No one can force you to be in a relationship with someone you don't want to be with. Why would you be with someone you despise so much? Sounds like you're creating your own problems and then blaming the world for the position you chose to be in. I also find it interesting when people pull out this whiny belief that casual sex as a young adult or teenager is somehow the end-all of human experience. If by "weren't allowed to be a young adult" you mean you didn't get to have sex in high school or c…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/25 07:23 AM
–

Well feel free to count mine as one you've encountered in the wild as well, then. Should be a decent counterbalance!
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/25 07:15 AM
–

I'm not even sure what that means. Most people grow and change throughout their lives. Hats off to you if you've been unimpeachable since the womb.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/25 07:14 AM
–

I'm not in the heads of women, but from listening to my friends and my girlfriends at varying stages of my life, they don't actually look at men in those terms (beta or whatever). Much like us, women also spend time growing up and changing their tastes. It's just consistently odd to me that some guys view it as some sort of manipulative trap women are pulling instead of the very real process of growing up and better understanding what you want out of life. Both my fiancé and I were less stable i…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/25 07:10 AM
–

What couples are you looking at? What's your relationship experience? I hear this so often from young men who have never experienced a close relationship with a woman, either romantic or platonic. My fiancé is awesome, and my life is better in so many ways because of our relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/25 07:05 AM
–

I hear this a lot from the misogyny crowd, and it never fails to make me laugh. First because many women aren't even currently looking for marriage or kids, but also because there seems to be a fundamental hatred for people once being teenagers or young adults before growing up. Many people experiment with casual sex and then go on to have families. For most of us, we leave casual sex behind because it sucked in every way imaginable. Not because we found our "back up plans."
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/25 07:01 AM
–

This is your internet addiction talking. Depending on where you live, women already are in the workforce as much as men. In America, women are now graduating higher education more frequently than men. They do not need providers. They're not looking for a "back up plan," most women are simply looking to spend their time with nice people who make them feel good. Which is, incidentally, the same thing most men are looking for. I don't know if you've ever been in a long-term relationships, but the h…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/25 06:43 AM
0

That's a pretty rude comment and generalization. I think that cruelty call is coming from inside the house.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/25 12:23 AM
5

I'm actually not going to enter into a conversation with someone who thinks it's acceptable to be so cruel to fellow human beings, so I'll stop it here. I hope you learn to find some empathy for the people around you.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/25 04:21 PM
1

Playing video games is innocuous to one person and a red flag to another. That's what she's saying. If someone doesn't want to be with a gamer, then someone who games will be a red flag for them. Whether or not you feel it's an issue is irrelevant. Men do the same thing with women.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/25 03:32 PM
3

Data wouldn't show that women don't send messages to the "bottom 80 percentile" of men, because that's a subjective measurement you're ascribing to them. There is no objective "top 10 percent" of men. Unrelated, you calling other human beings "land whales" doesn't speak that well of you.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/25 03:30 PM
1

Right. But this is a forum for debating, and you've posted something you call a "small reminder." So if it isn't something you want to debate, then it isn't really appropriate.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/25 10:21 AM
1

So what's the debate you're looking for?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/25 10:15 AM
6

That really just sounds like insecurity to me, as well as you putting your own opinions on the rest of us.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/25 09:51 AM
–

There have been, yeah. In addition to actual regulations forcing them to censor their lyrics for release on the radio.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 12:10 AM
1

Thanks!
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/25 06:48 PM
–

This is absolutely not a good point. There was a huge backlash to Eminem in particular, also 50 Cent. To this day there is a constant conversation in the music industry about misogynistic lyrics, music videos etc. You just notice the video game/comic book discourse more because that's what you're paying attention to.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/25 06:19 PM
0

Your hatred of women seems to manifest as a result of not being able to abuse, beat, or kill women, which I'm not sure says much for you. You're not doing those things because you don't have access to women, not because you wouldn't want to. That's fairly telling.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/25 06:17 PM
3

There's a pretty huge intersection between internet-addicted men with no social skills and misogynists, also. The thing I've noticed is while the charismatic misogynists might have a lack of respect for women, the internet-addicted misogynists have a true hatred for them.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/25 06:01 AM
42

This made me laugh a lot. What I will say is that I think when you're younger, the more misogynistic guys tend to also be the extroverted ones with more charisma and confidence. That's not always the case of course, and many of these boys are just posturing out of insecurity, but I think some people here mistake the attractiveness of confidence/charisma with the attractiveness of misogyny. If you're in college and you're an angry, loner misogynist and there's another misogynist who's cheerful, c…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/25 02:28 AM
2

We're a team. What do you even mean why would I support her and not myself? It's not a zero sum game. Whining and moping around like a baby because we're not having sex isn't "supporting myself," it's just behaving like a whiny baby.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 07:35 PM
3

What the fuck? No. You need help.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 07:33 PM
3

I really resent men equating my needs with sex only. Why are you so insistent on making us seem like pathetic animals? My fiancé has a high sex drive, yes sometimes higher than mine, and doesn't begrudge me not being ready at any moment. Similarly, we can both build resentment if the other one isn't pulling their weight with the house or being present. I'm very tired of it being presented as though all men want is sex and all women want is... I don't know. Emotional support? Money? I don't think…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 03:27 PM
1

Again, none of that would matter to me and all could be solved by communication. The more time I spend on the internet, the more eternally grateful for having the relationship I do.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/25 11:03 PM
2

Then there's an issue they should deal with as a partnership. I don't understand this at all. Do you guys not talk in your relationships? Do you not solve problems together and approach each other as a team? If you discover you're fundamentally incompatible, then separate. But otherwise, what is this attitude of cold war-ing your household?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/25 10:13 PM
8

Okay? I don't really respect people whose response to something going awry in their relationship is, "Well she started it" in terms of treating each other poorly. My sex life fluctuates as does everything in life. I value my relationship more than how often it gets me off.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/25 10:09 PM
8

I can’t imagine wanting to stop being supportive of my fiancé just because she didn’t want to have sex for a few weeks. Neither one of us would have any business being in an LTR or marriage if we had such callous attitudes towards each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/25 09:05 PM
34

If I felt like my fiancé was having sex with me out of a sense of obligation, I would stop because I would be super turned off. I fucking love it when she’s in the mood, and I can’t imagine anything hotter than being the reason she’s turned on. The idea that she’s placating me with sex is pretty repulsive, and I don’t understand guys who are fine with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/25 07:43 PM
2

You've suggested "mentally checking out and not giving a damn about wars, economy, or climate" That kind of thinking really doesn't gel with me. I can't imagine being disinterested in the world around me or willing to sacrifice all my agency because I'm unhappy with some aspect of my life.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/25 05:04 PM
6

Maturity mostly means you're fully developed as a human. I'm struggling to see the argument where it's a good thing to lack self-control, neglect your emotional stability, and refuse responsibility over your own life. You're essentially stomping your feet and pouting like a child. I enjoy taking care of my responsibilities and creating a life for myself. What else is there?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/25 04:53 PM
14

According to you, through the lens of your clear personal traumas with them. You're phrasing things like facts that are actually just your feelings about people based on your own experiences. Most of what you say about women could be flipped right back onto you, especially the ironic bit about women "writing rants online." --"Due to this trauma, imagined or otherwise, such damaged women who experience this often become feminists and/or misandrist and take it out on men as a whole."-- Clearly, so…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/25 04:24 PM
50

It actually seems like you're demonizing women due to your past personal traumas, so I'm not sure why you'd have a problem with the opposite even if it were true.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/25 03:40 PM
14

I'm a little iffy on your digression into AI, and I do actually think there are negative societal implications if more than half of men are single, but you're right about the general point. Living in a society where people are forced into relationships would be a bad thing for everyone, not just women. Some men seem to forget that. I'm actually more concerned about the breakdown in our social contract than having men or women unable to find dates. I'm concerned about our lack of respectful treat…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/25 03:38 PM
–

It's funnier than that because I'm a man who is engaged to... a woman. I've found lots of men in this sub seem to assume the people who are disagreeing with them are women.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/25 03:02 PM
2

It's a shame that you won't have an actual conversation with someone unless you can antagonize them. You just downvote and leave. That attitude is why I was curious if you understood the type of character required to keep a relationship or family together. Best of luck to you.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 08:32 PM
1

Lol we haven't been engaged for years.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 08:01 PM
1

Yeah, I've been with my fiancé for years.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 07:59 PM
–

Again, the way you approach and interact with people is incredibly off-putting. You're likely wrong that anything about your appearance is what's putting people off from wanting to pursue something romantic with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 06:33 PM
–

I'm a man. Edit: Let me tell you what I see from a small amount of interaction with you. You've been emotionally volatile, incoherent, aggressive, negative, combative, assumptive, and rude. You might find that if you approach people in the world with the attitude you'd like to receive back, you'd do a little better socially. Good luck to you.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 06:22 PM
2

The way this reads is that you've never experienced any of these things. Do you know what it takes to be a good partner? To cultivate a relationship where you have these things? Because every time I encounter another guy who talks like this, they're usually pretty negative people with very little experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 05:48 PM
2

I think with that kind of mindset you're warping your own perspective of the world. There is no way, objectively, that you've never witnessed someone being kind to someone else. There is also no way, objectively, that no one has ever done anything kind for you. In my experience, the men who believe this have such skewed views of the world that they completely ignore all positive interactions and focus solely on the negative. They luxuriate in manufacturing their confirmation bias, as it's all th…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 05:07 PM
3

I think at a certain point you have to try and get out of your own way with this kind of thinking, whether you're a man or a woman. Sometimes people are going to leave or break up with you even if you haven't done anything wrong. Sometimes you're going to encounter rude people. Sometimes your life is going to suck. But it's still your life, and you get to decide how to approach every day and try to get something out of it. I was raised to believe there is inherent worth in being kind, regardless…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 02:56 PM
–

I'm not sure what you're trying to say with that. But again, in my experience women put in a lot of time and effort to keep up their appearances.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 02:20 PM
–

Nope
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 04:27 AM
–

Nope
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 04:25 AM
–

It depends on what you're comparing it to, but we like being busy. I guess my general point was that people are focusing way too much on what someone looks like as opposed to the lifestyle they want to live. Because I see lots of bodybuilder bros who are actually unhealthy medically and thin girls who smoke like chimneys. Plus, we're all going to be old anyway. Looks above all is short-sighted as hell.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 03:55 AM
–

I make less than my fiancé, and I started losing my hair at 18. Try again.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 03:17 AM
–

This is pretty untrue in my experience. Have you ever been in a long-term relationship with a woman?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 02:56 AM
–

My fiancé and I were in similar shape when we met. Not instagram models, but we were both regular exercisers and looked like it. I was probably in better shape than she was, depending on how you'd measure it. I've been a long-distance runner for a while. Since we've been together, our fitness has fluctuated through life events etc. I don't think your literal body shape holds as much importance in long-term relationships as general compatibility. As in, both my fiancé and I enjoy going for walks,…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 02:49 AM
1

Lol fair enough. But then people should realize they're in their early 20s and most of the time dating is overdramatic in your early 20s. It was for people "in my generation" too. If you're 19-22, everything feels like the end of the world. It isn't.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 11:07 PM
2

Lol I'm not "scared to say them," I just don't care about engaging with whatever sad andrew tate ideology you've guzzled. Someday you'll wake up and realize most of us don't hyperfixate on facial features, height, or bodycount. Whether you realize it early enough to create any meaningful connections, it's up to you.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 08:34 PM
2

He's not above six feet, and I'm not shallow so I don't rate people's faces. As I said, he's the most beautiful person in the world to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 08:29 PM
0

LOL this is why you're not popular with women. I love my husband, and he's the most beautiful man in the world to me. What other people think about his looks—I genuinely couldn't care a bit less.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 08:24 PM
0

I think that because I met him through my friends who have been friends with him for years. After we started dating, they've mentioned a couple of times about different girls who used to have a crush on him. He was either oblivious to it or uninterested. He's popular with women because he's a very good listener and a genuinely kind person. He has lots of platonic women friends as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 08:19 PM
5

I'm Gen Z, so I don't know what you're talking about. I'm not a teenager, but I'm not an "older woman."
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 05:43 PM
5

Yeah, that's a preposterous timeline to get all of those things done. I've seen couples get married fast, but I've never seen anyone go from single to married with a kid in a year or less.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 05:22 PM
9

My husband probably could've dated around if he wanted to, but he hadn't had a girlfriend in a few years when we met. I also hadn't had a boyfriend in a few years. Neither one of us had been super sexually active. We met and just clicked, to be honest. Takes like this confuse me so much. The dating world isn't as machiavellian as some of you believe.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 04:13 PM
1

Lol okey doke. I'm happily married to an awesome person, so I don't know where your "none of y'all" comes from. People can hide who they are until they can't. So it's almost like they hide it at first and then let a little out bit by bit. You know, like how human interactions often work. Hope you get less bitter!
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/25 07:24 PM
1

You said "just that inferior male specimen you chose over me is your own cross to bear" and so I responded that I was married to somebody awesome to imply that your weird worldview that you're the only good man isn't accurate, and most of us are partnered up with great people who treat us well.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/25 09:25 PM
1

You seem weirdly bitter. Maybe if you chose better you wouldn't be so angry at women all the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/25 09:17 PM
1

Lol I'm very happily married to the best person in the world.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/25 09:12 PM
0

It's an abusive person's fault for choosing to be abusive to their partner. You guys often blame someone experiencing abuse for picking someone who is "a chad" even when what we've done is choose someone who seemed nice and normal, with no height/income requirements. Are men okay? Sometimes people aren't as nice as we thought they were. Shit happens. And lots of us choose just fine. I'm married to an absolutely excellent man, but thank you.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/25 09:11 PM
1

I don't feel bad for men who feel "friendzoned." You're choosing to be in that situation. So why don't you choose better?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/25 09:01 PM
7

Lol most people don't wander the countryside looking for conflicts because we're regular people with regular lives who just enjoy spending time with the people we love doing things we enjoy. Have fun with whatever fantasy this is.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/25 09:00 PM
20

Yikes, this is such a negative view of your own gender. My husband has a group of close male friends who text quite a lot and talk on the phone/get together in person at least twice a month, usually more. He's always excited to tell me what they're talking about when he gets home—reminiscing about when they were younger, someone discovered a new weird cereal, someone quit their job and is trying to write a book. They play basketball at the gym or go to bar trivia. They've gone on road trips toge…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/25 03:54 PM
1

Lol that just isn't true. At all.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/25 02:16 PM
1

Yeah, it's almost like sometimes we meet men who are bad at hiding how negatively they view women and sometimes we meet men who are good at hiding it.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/25 07:16 AM
8

Plenty. You're just confirming what I said earlier. Your mindset makes you believe that everything women do is evil, and every man is a silent victim. That's a lose-lose mindset, and you'll only find things to confirm your bias.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/25 05:43 AM
16

Lol okay, let me make it as clear as possible. Everyone is choosing people they assume will make them happy. No one goes into a relationship believing they'll be worse off afterwards. Sometimes, especially when you're young, you get it wrong. You guys somehow always believe we're picking men because they're giant playboys or went to jail or have a six-pack or are 6'2 or make 4 million a year. Sometimes we just pick an average, seemingly nice person. And again, if that person ends up being abusiv…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/25 01:34 AM
-2

Good one! Way to put me in my place.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/25 12:29 AM
46

And when those same men hear stories that women's objectively average-looking or short or low-income partners have abused them in some way or cheated on them, the retort is always, "choose better." Like, there is never any situation where this rhetoric finds fault with men. It is always, always, always the woman's fault. From this mindset.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/25 12:24 AM
3

I have no idea. I do think a majority of the world wants to be in a situation where they're happy.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/25 09:50 PM
5

You have no way of knowing what is and isn't in the majority of women's heads. Most people as they're growing up exist in a world where you're told that dating is normal, so most of us do. Their experiences with dating have made them realize they're happier alone, so they prefer being alone. That's not settling, that's deciding to do what makes you feel good and happy. I'm happily married, and they're happily single. No one has settled for anything, we're all doing what makes us the happiest.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/25 09:44 PM
9

You have? How do you get invited into their houses? The people, both men and women, posting on the internet about how upset they are they haven't found anyone are obviously not happily single. Shockingly, those aren't the woman I'm talking about. More than four women exist, and some of us feel differently to each other. I'm speaking about the women I know personally. You are making a generalization about things you've seen on the internet.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/25 09:05 PM
4

Woof. So much misogyny to unpack in one post! Solitary confinement is considered torture because you don't have contact with anyone. Why are misogynists so averse to cultivating friendships? Can you not strike up a passing conversation with the person checking out your groceries? Say "hello" to someone you pass on the street? Are you confined to a 20x20 windowless square? Get a grip. "Men don't value those traits in women." No man, YOU don't value those traits in women. Plenty do, and lots of th…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/25 08:34 PM
11

Men deserve their suffering because they are 100% responsible for it. They post horrible things on the internet and make up insane generalizations about people to solidify their confirmation bias and find like-minded misogynists. Men claim they can't help who they are attracted to, but this is nonsense because they can't all marry 18-year-old virgin porn stars. They choose the wrong women and then rail on the internet about how all women are horrible, never taking any responsibility for their ac…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/25 08:09 PM
21

What do you view as "success?" The single women I know view it as being happy. They haven't found any men who make them happier being alone, so they're chill not looking anymore. They don't think about things like "market value."
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/25 07:59 PM
22

Most women are fine with being alone because they cultivate deep friendships and ties to their community. They volunteer, have pets, and spend their time in groups to uplift them when they're feeling lonely. If men did the same, they could also reap the social rewards. There's nothing gendered about building a social network. And most single women I know aren't sleeping around or even looking to date. They don't care about male validation, which is why they're happy.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/25 07:57 PM
–

Ah, I'm very jealous of your living situation! I agree that America seems to have a fetish for being divisive. It makes living here obnoxious at times.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/25 12:00 PM
–

So as someone who considers themselves a feminist, I'll say that feminism isn't supposed to be about hating men. At least, it isn't for me. I'm sorry if that's been your experience with it, but it's not the way I interpret it. Personally, I don't see anything currently as a men vs. women issue. It's strictly the working class vs. oligarchs at this point. We shouldn't be forced to live in a world where we're paying subscription fees for literally just existing and don't have any spaces to interac…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/25 11:56 AM
3

Hahah good job, everybody!
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/25 04:33 PM
61

I think if you have to "use" something to keep someone interested in you, it'll never work. Sex, money, status, whatever. The main reason people throw out advice like "be yourself" is because everything else is window-dressing. Looks fade, financial situations and status can change in a heartbeat, people get sick and disabled. More to the point, anyone worth being in a relationship with will understand if there are times you can't/don't want to have sex, regardless of gender. Intimacy is about f…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/25 08:34 AM
6

This is so sweet! I felt the same way about my husband.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/25 05:03 AM
1

Right, I don't really care what will and will not be considered normal though. Social media is considered normal now, but it wasn't always and lots of us would argue it's been a net negative for the world in a myriad of ways. I feel the same about AI relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/25 05:01 AM
3

I think there's definitely an uptick in people misusing therapy words. What their intentions are is less clear. Sometimes they could just be mistaken, sometimes they might be trying to manipulate.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 06:12 PM
1

It's not a bad point that people identifying themselves could be beneficial, but to me it runs the risk of making those perspectives/beliefs/whatever more prevalent and more acceptable. I hope I'm wrong though!
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 05:39 PM
2

You told me I needed to get a dictionary. Then you told me I needed therapy. Then you said I was either a liar or a terrible writer. I'm not really interested in continuing a conversation because it doesn't seem like you're focused on the subject matter. But have a nice day!
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 04:01 PM
1

They do seem sexist, demeaning, and objectifying. But they don't make me feel lesser. One is an observation, the other is a feeling. You seem more interested in insults than discussion, so I assume you were feeling upset about someone using those words. You're absolutely allowed to spend your money on whatever you want.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 03:38 PM
2

I think a bit of both, probably. I don't fault anyone for having a curiosity about sex dolls or AI girlfriends or whatever new thing goes on. Personally, I blame the people pushing this tech for our crumbling gender relations. If men and women are happy together, there's no reason to pay for a sex robot is there? I do worry about some of the rhetoric I hear around sex robots, as if it's given some men permission to say really horrible shit about women. And in that way, I think it's revealing som…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 03:31 PM
0

I don't feel lesser because they exist. I'm pretty chill with whatever people want to do in their own bedrooms. I simply feel like they're a bad omen for gender relations. There wasn't really a reason to get so triggered by what I said.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 03:25 PM
2

Nothing I said was uncivil. You however have come at me aggressively two times for no reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 03:22 PM
2

Seems like you're bringing some unrelated baggage into this discussion. I don't know anything about what a "high value man" is, nor do I care.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 07:43 AM
7

I mean, think whatever you want. That isn't what I said, so I assume you didn't feel like reading further. You're certainly allowed to spend your money on whatever you like.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 07:35 AM
11

Yeah, it does feel very similar! Like am I "mad" about sex robots? Not really, but I am worried about what they'll lead to. I feel the same about AI girlfriends etc. Sexism aside, I don't think these inventions are good as they encourage us to spend more time around imitations of human interaction rather than connecting for real.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 07:05 AM
10

I'm not wild about the idea of sex robots, but it has nothing to do with me wanting to date/not date the men who use them or what I think about them at all. It simply feels super sexist, objectifying, and demeaning to me. And I'd imagine most women who respond aggressively feel the same. They're not akin to vibrators at all—men already have sex toys that are similar. This is a facsimile of a woman similar to blow-up dolls except they're getting far more realistic. The idea that these men really …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 06:56 AM
2

"No one is telling one-time victim of abuse to choose better." Yeah... This is demonstrably false. Many, many people push this idea.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 03:17 PM
7

I'm not really sure what you're arguing. I never said anything about multiple relationships so that came out of nowhere. But yeah—sometimes it is too much to ask that people recognize whether they feel safe and supported. Maybe they've never been in a healthy relationship before. Maybe they have no frame of reference for how something like that is supposed to feel. Not everyone grows up with positive examples of love or intimacy. Some people have already experienced this level of abuse from thei…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 06:12 AM
5

I don't think enough people understand that by the time the abuse becomes "obvious," you are often stuck. Abuse happens slowly, through financial and emotional means. They break you down a little bit at a time, so completely that by the time they actually start punching you in the face, you feel completely worthless and/or dependent on them for money, housing, connection, whatever. You have no friends anymore. No family. They've all been cut off because your partner convinced you they were bad i…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 04:56 AM
5

Well sure, it works if what you're avoiding are strangers. But most abuse happens with someone close to you—a parent, a family friend, a spouse. The "mitigation methods" ward off people who are easy to spot, the obvious predators, and less competent manipulators. Those men are often easier to avoid unless they are particularly aggressive stalkers. But there are plenty of abusive men who "pass the smell test" so to speak, and we get blamed for those too. You suggested that women need to take more…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 01:49 AM
2

This is actually what most women do, though. Most of us try on a daily basis to be cautious or wary when meeting unfamiliar men and vet them before getting more intimate or even being alone with them non-sexually. We are intensely focused on self-protection and trying to stay away from danger. Nobody wants to be assaulted or hurt. The thing is, we tend to get villainized for this behavior, too. We hear things like, "Why are you treating me like a predator? I'm a nice guy. That hurts my feelings.…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 01:28 AM
9

I think I agree with some of what you're saying, in that nothing's guaranteed ever in life and if you're unsatisfied with your relationship you should leave or get a divorce. But as someone who's been with my favorite person for years now, I can't agree that "traditional" marriage should die. I love being married. We're far, far more in love now than when we met. Just maybe don't marry the first person you get to know or at least wait until you know yourself well. You'd be surprised how much bet…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/25 11:36 PM
–

But that's what she's saying: "Many women cannot hear male pain about love because it sounds like an indictment of female failure. Since sexist norms have taught us that loving is our task whether in our role as mothers or lovers or friends, if men say they are not loved, then we are at fault; we are to blame” People can be horrible, and I'm sorry if someone's been horrible to you. People have been horrible to me, too. We should be able to band together and work against the harmful, sexist ideas…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/25 03:06 AM
–

Feminism is supposed to be about equality—and unlearning patriarchal standards is important for everyone. Because they harm everyone! Once women release the sexist idea that we're responsible for making men feel loved, it becomes easier to hear about their pain and struggles.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/25 12:54 AM
3

As I said before, I don't think you're lashing out at the correct person.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/25 07:17 PM
2

Nowhere in my comment did I cast blame for patriarchal gender expression expectations. I did, however, note how all of us are harmed by them. Because we are. You seem to have an issue with something else, and not me. I suggest you take that energy to them or take some personal responsibility for your own feelings instead of projecting them my way.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/25 06:41 PM
4

Patriarchal standards have nothing to do with what people want to do. They involve a strict set of expectations for each gender where you get punished if you venture too far outside of it. That doesn't mean there aren't women who enjoy being "stereotypically" feminine or men who enjoy being "stereotypically" masculine, but the system is in place to keep people divided in those boxes, despite the fact that many of us fall short and outside of them. I'm not even sure what you're arguing or what yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/25 05:58 PM
8

My evidence? I suppose that, in the range of human experiences, there are men who enjoy "feminine" hobbies, are very comfortable expressing their emotions, and vice versa. Women exist who are very assertive and less comfortable expressing their emotions. If it was biological, all men and all women would more closely adhere to these preconceived biological essentialist boxes.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/25 10:27 PM
35

Much like how boys have often been conditioned to "suck it up," not be vulnerable, or engage in only masculine hobbies, girls are often conditioned from an early age to stay quiet even if they're angry/upset, stay passive, and refrain from aggressively going after what they want (both romantically and in their careers) because it isn't "ladylike." Both of these are symptoms of patriarchal gender expression expectations, and can do damage to everyone in social, work, and romantic relationships as…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/25 09:29 PM
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And that can happen with anyone regardless of gender. But his question was whether he should bother with a relationship. And to me, his attitude suggests he isn't suited for one at the present moment.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/25 07:52 PM
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And after some time dating, some men do the same. A partnership is about helping each other, supporting each other, and making your life together as happy as possible. If you're angry at the idea of being asked to help someone you love move to a new place, you're certainly not mandated to do so, but you might not be suited to being in an intimate relationship. Or even a friendship. All relationships have some facet of give and take, of support and being supported. It sounds like what you and he …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/25 07:41 PM
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My relationship contains lots of compromise, and both of us have spent time putting the other's needs or wants first in ways that make us feel happy. Neither one of us feels slighted because we don't view our relationship as a competition. We work as a team, we move as a team. Our relationship matters quite a bit to us, and we both are invested in making the other happy. Surprisingly enough, making him happy also makes me happy. And vice versa. Sacrifices often don't feel like sacrifices when th…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/25 06:57 PM
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Thank you! I hope you find someone who makes you feel the same way.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/25 04:48 PM
81

I've been with the love of my life for years, and coming home is my favorite part of the day. We approach our lives as a team. I genuinely can't imagine my life without him, and he says the same. Your attitude would suggest to me that maybe you shouldn't bother with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/25 01:31 AM
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As you've made abundantly clear, the only kind of love you're interested in is cheap love. I hope you find what you're looking for.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/24 03:11 AM
2

Oh man, I think this would be so helpful in so many discussions. Because those are definitely very different discourses! Shockingly, complexities can get lost on the internet.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/24 02:31 AM
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For sure! It's important to feel loved and secure however that manifests for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/24 01:54 AM
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But why would I even know this? I've been with my husband for years, and I know very little about the sexual habits between him and his exes, and vice versa. I don't know if they went on big trips together or if he spent huge amounts of money on her birthday compared to mine. Why would I care? I like the way he treats me, full-stop. If I didn't, I would leave. You are not mature enough to be in a relationship if you live in a constant state of perpetual comparison with people who aren't even inv…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/24 01:48 AM
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This is, in fact, how many couples go years and years and years (or forever) without cheating on each other!
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/24 12:23 AM
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The straight-up ludicrousness of going from "If a woman has demonstrated this behavior in the past but then makes another man wait for physical intimacy, it raises a critical question: why the double standard? Such behavior suggests a lack of consistency and signals that the man being made to wait is viewed differently, perhaps as less desirable or less deserving." to "Respect is a cornerstone of any healthy long-term relationship, and when it’s absent at the start, it’s unlikely to develop late…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/24 12:22 AM
8

There's an interesting problem around this discourse where I hear a lot of men saying things like, "We don't get any help" but might not recognize what women are doing to get help. I had to try out four different therapists the first time I sought mental health before I found a good one. When she retired, I had to go out again on speed-dating for therapists. Then my insurance kicked her off, so I did it all again. It's HARD to find a support system, and even if you have a good one you have to sh…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/24 05:32 PM
3

Woof. You guys are truly trapped in prisons of your own design. I love my job and my coworkers, both men and women. We support each other and spend our days doing something we love and believe in. I can't imagine what it must feel like to be trapped in such a hate-filled bubble, knowing other people are just casually out in the world having fun and building connections.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/24 10:11 PM
12

"idgaf if your career suffers because you’re a woman. I’m not including you to any of the after hours team building activities or any of the lunches or any of the other things men use to network." That is textbook gender discrimination. An after-hours teambuilding activity would be a work event. If you invite only men to a work event and exclude the women, that's discrimination. You are the enemy you're fighting against, my dude. You are creating the sexism that feminists react to.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/24 10:07 PM
6

My point is, it wouldn't be a false accusation. You are literally guilty of gender discrimination. So... Yeah, I guess you should protect yourself against people finding out who you are?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/24 10:03 PM
10

I mean, everything you just said was gender discrimination and should get you fired. The idea that you think someone bringing a complaint against you would be "unfounded" is kind of funny because... You are a textbook example.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/24 09:59 PM
1

I've been with the love of my life for years now. We've certainly overcome complicated situations and stuck together in times when we weren't at our best, loved each other more completely than my blood relatives ever had, and still are happy when we wake up to each other every morning. You're certainly allowed to create whatever family you want, but thinking you can't have as strong—or a stronger bond with your romantic partner—is likely a self-fulfilling prophecy. Friends can drift away, family…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/24 09:18 PM
3

Lol nothing about that post had to do with age. I'd rather have a kid before 35, but I still have almost 10 years. I just don't trust our government anymore to let me do it safely. Nothing I said was incorrect. Everyone's fertility declines as they get older, along with things that can affect the length of time to conceive, miscarriages, stillbirths, birth defects, and chromosomal disorders. That's just objectively true for everyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/12/24 12:47 AM
1

I absolutely did! And now my husband and I are planning other options. But none of that has anything to do with my points about fertility. I'm sorry if you feel so sensitive about men having reproductive realities as to stalk my profile.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/12/24 12:35 AM
4

Huh. Seems like I upset someone who's either approaching or over 40. You are allowed to do whatever you like regardless of what I think, friend.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/12/24 12:19 AM
1

I don't judge people for having kids later, but there are realities to choosing to do it. Those pregnancies often need to be monitored more closely because the risk of miscarriage and stillbirth rises. It's harder to bring a baby to term, and that's even before you start worrying about birth defects. It's much harder on a woman's body, even after 35. I'm just fairly consistently confused by people who suggest women need to "settle down" early and men can keep procreating until their 60s, because…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/12/24 12:13 AM
8

If a man wants kids, he should be having them before 40—similar to women. BOTH men's and women's fertility declines as they get older. Older men have a higher chance of birth defects in pregnancy, miscarriages, Down syndrome etc same as older women. While men *might* be able to have kids their entire lives, the quality of sperm goes down dramatically after 40 and may start much earlier. I don't even know what "the wall" means, but men aren't exempt from aging.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/12/24 12:05 AM
3

Self-love is important. I've also been with the love of my life for years. Not sure why they'd even be conflicting concepts. I'm always very confused when I see "hot takes" like this. What in the world?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/24 12:09 AM
1

You're on Reddit, friend. I hope you find peace within yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/24 05:46 PM
3

You don't know my politics though. I see that you're probably trying your best to muddle through now by coming in hot to try and stir things up. You think it'll help make you feel better or that by trying to make people angry you've achieved something somehow. As I said before and will continue to say forever, billionaires are the enemy of the common man.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/24 05:38 PM
6

It bums me out a little that this post didn't get more engagement. I thought you made some really great points, and I wish people didn't get so stuck in whatever it is that's feeding the division. But I am heartened by those of us who feel the same!
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/24 12:43 AM
5

Yeah, I think everyone can agree that the rich are too rich and the poor are too poor. Of course in any society there are always going to be wealthy people and impoverished people, but the current disparity is ridiculous and unrelated to how hard people work. I think if we focused on solutions for that, it'd be easier to compromise and find middle ground with the vast majority of average working people.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/24 12:33 AM
3

I mean, most people in general are subject to their parents' influence when it comes to their choice of partner. There might not be any legal framework for it, but lots and lots of people have close relationships with their families, care what they think, or even defer to their opinions on the people they bring home. I would think most women want a choice in their circumstances. What do you mean by security? Blindly giving up your autonomy isn't security. Some parents might not have your best in…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/12/24 08:05 PM
25

I think this is all pretty true, so I don't want to nitpick at it. Much like the political divide, I wish we could see that the average people are so much more closely aligned in circumstance than they think. What would be good for one side would likely benefit the other. Billionaires are the only real enemy, to me at least. The rest of us are usually just trying our best to muddle through.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/12/24 07:24 PM
0

Even in this ridiculous hypothetical situation, it'd be undeniable that my son is in the hospital. I'd be more immediately concerned about his health than the legal repercussions. Other than that, I'd wait and see how the investigation unfolds and go from there. Why is this framed as some sort of "gotcha"? What a weird hypothetical.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/12/24 07:08 PM
5

I think for most women, the ideal would be a man who cares about her finishing during sex at all and not caring whether it's by using his dick or otherwise.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/12/24 06:50 PM
5

I'm pretty positive my partner does have fleeting desires to sleep with other people. I don't care. He's with me, and passing thoughts don't negate what we have. He can tell me or not tell me! Although I think it'd be uncool if he told me as a means to make me feel bad or put me below someone else. Why would he tell me that? I mean, there's a lot of extra context needed. If he just came home from work one day and announced, "Boy, Helen looked super sexy at work today and I almost fucked her, but…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 01:16 AM
1

One of my favorite things about my partner is his ability to deescalate situations instead of engaging in violence or physical aggression. He's not a pushover but he's also not rude. He knows his boundaries, and when people are behaving rudely or dangerously, he'll simply put a stop to it or exit the situation. It's actually incredibly sexy to see him keep his cool in volatile situations and handle things like an adult.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/24 09:27 PM
3

Nope, I am not. I'm not sure how to explain what the popular vote majority is in a different way. Feel free to read the link I posted though.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/24 08:20 PM
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My "attack" against him was showing you that claiming PayPal, Tesla, and SpaceX as his successes is objectively untrue.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/24 08:03 PM
4

He has never won the popular vote majority (over 50%) which is what I said. https://nymag.com/intelligencer/article/election-results-show-trump-has-lost-popular-vote-majority.html
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/24 07:56 PM
6

https://www.forbes.com/sites/danalexander/2021/10/11/its-official-trump-would-be-richer-if-he-had-just-invested-his-inheritance-into-the-sp500/ https://www.slashgear.com/1145295/elon-musks-biggest-tech-failures-that-no-one-talks-about/
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/24 07:47 PM
3

He never won the popular vote majority in any of the 3 elections he ran in, and if he'd taken the fortune his father gave him and simply put it in the bank to collect interest, he'd have way more money than he does now. He and Elon Musk (who worked as an illegal immigrant in the states) have only taken family fortunes and used them to finance business failures while duping people too stupid to understand the difference. That's your skill failure, not the left's.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/24 07:33 PM
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Okay great, then show me the examples you found of women calling for the enslavement, mass rape, and slaughter of men that has not only not been removed, but is being actively supported.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/24 07:22 PM
6

Yeah, I'm not understanding the cooking part. Most couples I know (including my own) cook all the time and reserve takeout/frozen food for special occasions or nights when we're too tired. We function perfectly fine getting healthy nutrition while having jobs. The "trad" lifestyle is expensive because if you're trying to support 3-4 people on one salary, you can't be bringing home 50K and expect it to work. Professional opportunities aren't just for money/fame either, it's nice to feel like you'…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/24 06:01 AM
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I mean again, if you're this obsessed with 16 year old girls, you have lots of other things to worry about than me finding you disgusting.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/24 02:01 AM
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I said nothing about legality. You claim older women are jealous of the attention men like you give to teenagers. And I'm telling you that women regardless of age are not at all jealous, they find men pursuing teenagers embarrassing at best. If you're 26 and thinking of a 16 year old as a viable sexual option, then you've got much bigger issues than worrying about what I think of you.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/24 01:43 AM
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Anecdotally, my partner and I are in a smaller age gap relationship (not 15+ years or anything). I have no issue with it, and no one's ever meddled to say we shouldn't be together. I would have had a significant issue if I'd met my partner when I was a teenager, though. He's too much older than I am for that to have been appropriate, and I would've thought he was an absolute creep. We met when we were both independent adults with jobs and friends, and there wasn't any sort of power imbalance to …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/24 12:33 AM
5

I'm glad to hear it's something you wouldn't tolerate in your spaces! I'm sorry if it's something you deal with regularly. I'm always happy when men have a space to support each other. My partner has his own spaces like that, and I know he'd be similarly upset if hateful rhetoric started to infiltrate in.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 11:45 PM
21

Yeah, because those anti-female subreddits weren't tolerated by Reddit's TOS. Because they were violent and threatening. My point is, I haven't seen any threatening or violent posts on any "toxic female" subreddits, and if there have been then the moderators and the community have had them taken down themselves. If there was the same type of intolerance towards violent rhetoric within the incel subreddits, maybe they wouldn't have been banned.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 10:15 PM
24

But if it's taken down, then that's kind of my point. Anything like that actually isn't being encouraged, tolerated, or celebrated.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 10:08 PM
17

Well you're welcome to go over there and check yourself! Nobody has to take my word for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 10:07 PM
8

I would imagine that as subs grow larger they can be infiltrated by bad actors. That's why moderators are so important. I don't think Reddit is just saying "men are congregating and they have to stop," though. There was a lot of truly concerning stuff on some of the incel subs that I saw.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 10:05 PM
19

Okay, so where are all the posts advocating the mass murder of men that's being encouraged by the sub and its members?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 09:58 PM
19

I just did, and I don't see anything like that there. One of the most recent posts is about how much some woman's fiance helped her out when she was feeling sick. Again, you might see comments suggesting someone should leave her relationship or something, but there's no, "I wish I could anally rape them" like there is in the incel-focused corners. That's my point.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 09:56 PM
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I don't vilify male role models in general—there are many men in the world who I think are exceptional role models to look up to, for both men and women. In fact, they were the norm for many, many, many years. I just don't like the ones who suggest women are inferior, laugh about repealing the 19th Amendment, and are actively engaged in violent sex crimes against women. That shouldn't be too difficult a bar to clear, and yet here we are. When most women are suggesting men "fix themselves," it's …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 08:41 PM
17

Well I don't agree with you, because "the state" is at this moment enacting violence against women among many other groups. But even if that were true, my point still stands. You can't engage in violent threats against an entire group of people and still have a presence on Reddit. You can have your violent extremist network on other platforms, just not here.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 08:20 PM
23

To be fair, the "too toxic" male spaces tend to involve rape and death threats. The "too toxic" female spaces might have anti-male sentiment, but usually without the call to violence.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 08:09 PM
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This is actually a pretty great point. I'm not sure what OP wants from this. Is he complaining that women aren't more impolite? Even a woman who's disappointed in someone's dick size usually has the courtesy to simply stay quiet and move on. If they don't, then that's pretty cruel. Is this like a fetish or something? Do some men NEED women to ridicule tiny dicks? If some guy didn't like my body, I'd rather him move on to someone else without screaming in my face, "Your body disgusts me." Like...…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 08:02 PM
1

I love my partner so fucking much it honestly feels surreal sometimes. He's the best, kindest, smartest, funniest person I've ever met. We disagree sometimes, but we both respect each other and do things constantly to help each other out and make our lives better. I leave him little love notes all around the house to find—inside his cereal box, in his wallet, in his car's cupholder. And he does similar things for me. Our entire relationship is about making each other feel loved, safe, and import…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/24 09:17 PM
2

I think you're conflating people who struggle asking for empathy to people struggle asking for total agreement and endorsement. And to my main point, lots of what you've said here could be construed as a lack of empathy for many different types of people. Which was the starting point of the post.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 04:11 PM
9

Also just because a woman feels like she needs to be cautious around men doesn't mean she has a mental illness. Didn't want that to get lost in the mud. Not all anxiety is disordered anxiety. And the current climate in America is very misogynistic in a way that would understandably put women's guards up around men they don't know.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 07:28 AM
7

You say that the views of people with PTSD are not valid, and I'd disagree with you on several points about PTSD and the lingering effects of trauma that don't get diagnosed as PTSD. The disorder comes from somewhere. The fears come from somewhere. There is an instigating action that has made them experience a fear-based response to certain stimuli. I don't know whether you've been in therapy, but the deconstruction of anxiety doesn't involve repeatedly telling people that what they feel isn't r…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 07:19 AM
10

No one pretends PTSD is a normal condition. Most of us recognize the absolute hell it puts people through and try to help or at least empathize with their experience. I think some people with your perspective pretend it is easily fixable and view the people suffering with mental illness as somehow at fault or lacking in willpower. To quote you, "it is called disorder for a reason." It's not something people sign up for, advocate, or enjoy. And to me, it's that lack of empathy that OP is speaking…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 06:43 AM
17

It would actually make sense if you experienced lingering paranoia or fear due to what happened to you. It's cool that you didn't, but experiencing traumatic events tends to leave marks on people, no matter how severe. It's the reason why veterans experience PTSD and why people often experience agoraphobia after being a victim or witness to violent crime/mass casualty events. Sexual assault on women is so prevalent that a healthy amount of hesitation when navigating the world is warranted in lot…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 06:14 AM
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