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MeanPhysics Archive

View 1 post and 114 comments by MeanPhysics on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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10

MeanPhysics/r/askMRP21/02/20 04:08 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
3

OYS 30 37yo, 6’1”, 188lbs, 11%bf (Calipers). Married 10 yrs, together 13. 2 kids, 8 & 4. Bench 320, OHP 180, Squat 310 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Swallowed the pill 9/2017, OYS since 9/2019 ​ Mental: Back in the saddle. Haven’t posted since the end of Oct, and it’s been good to take time away and let the lessons settle into my day to day. Over the last 2 months, my leadership of the family has been fully, openly, repeatedly recognized by …
/r/MarriedRedPill05/01/21 04:15 PM
9

Initiating— Don’t get caught up in the upper level strategies in some of the pickup books. You just do it. You just initiate. I remember the first time I told my wife directly, after 7 years of marriage and months here, that I wanted sex. It was something stupid like— her:”do you want to watch a show?” Me: “I’d rather go upstairs and have sex”. And I shit you not my heart was pounding. I’d worked myself up to this for probably a day. I practiced saying something like that in response to a bunch …
/r/MarriedRedPill22/12/20 01:20 PM
1

Yeah, fair point. I hit target this week and am leveling off... lets see if some extra calories get things going again.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/10/20 02:28 AM
1

Its a good push. I would really like to see more leg gainz.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/10/20 09:18 PM
2

I’ve found intermittent fasting to be really effective for hunger control in a cut. It doesn’t work for everyone but man, it works for me. And I’m glad someone finally called me out on my god awful squat. I’ve got a rebuilt knee (car accident) that doesn’t seem to be able to take anything over 230. Deads seem better, for some reason, so I’m working my up there.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/10/20 11:46 AM
1

OYS: 29 37yo, 6’1”, 186lbs, 10%bf (Calipers). Married 9 yrs, together 12. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 320, OHP 180, Squat 310 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Swallowed the pill 9/2017, OYS since 9/2019 ​ Mental: I’ve been less dialed in at work for the last couple of months than I’d like to be, and I’ve realized that that behavior, in and of itself, was hurting my overall attitude. I wasn’t fully focused, so my mind wandered, so I felt bored and thou…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/10/20 01:12 PM
2

This is a good question and gives me pause. Certainly at the beginning, I was motivated by the impact that a higher SMV would have on my interactions in the world, especially with my wife. That changed over pretty quickly to just wanting to put up bigger numbers, gain more muscle while losing fat, for the sake of being the best me I can be. For the last 2 years, that "best I can be" was mostly about more muscle, and so I tolerated higher fat periods (up into 15% at peak of bulk) but have seen th…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/09/20 04:06 PM
1

OYS: 29 37yo, 6’1”, 195lbs, 14%bf (Calipers). Married 9 yrs, together 12. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 320, OHP 180, Squat 310 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Swallowed the pill 9/2017, OYS since 9/2019 ​ Mental: I’m in some weird middle ground. This last month or so, I’ve probably been less focused on red-pill progress than any time since I started. It’s not that it doesn’t matter, it’s that progress toward some red-pill ideal is not the thing at the…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/09/20 01:53 PM
5

I have found a different mental attitude helpful in the process: I treat her tests as if everything is said to improve me. Angry that the dish washer was not filled correctly? Pretty clear I haven't been on top of my shit. This is not wrong. As long as you tweak it slightly: Angry the dishwasher was not filled correctly? I should examine the situation to see if I need to better own my shit. If you let her anger tell you you're off your game, you're still RIGHT in her frame. If you're viewing own…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/09/20 08:26 PM
1

OYS: 28 37yo, 6’1”, 193lbs, 12%bf (Calipers). Married 9 yrs, together 12. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 320, OHP 180, Squat 310 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Swallowed the pill 9/2017, OYS since 9/2019 ​ Mental: Previously when I went through these periods of very low attraction in my marriage, there was a lot of anger that accompanied the experience. That has been absent this time. The lack of attraction was very real, but seems to have triggered a …
/r/MarriedRedPill01/09/20 11:42 AM
1

Yes, this is 100% true. She’s what The me of a year ago deserved, and would have been thrilled with. And when I’m clear on my expectations, clearly expressive of my desires, she comes around. ... her sexual nature also spikes when my interest is low. Surprise surprise.
/r/MarriedRedPill31/08/20 12:41 PM
2

No, probably worth doing, though my over all sex drive is still very high. Its attraction to my wife that has collapsed.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/08/20 07:49 PM
2

To some extent, I think this is right. I do, though, have a POV on what I'm interested in, the behavior I want to see. And I'm not seeing that from her, consistently, yet. And while that used to drive me to try to work harder to get her more interested, to show desire for me..... now I just can't be bothered. If she's going to behave in a way that's arousing to me, great, that's arousing. If not, then every 3-4 days, I'll get horny enough that I'm interested and initiate. Recognizing that a woma…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/08/20 09:55 PM
2

...I mean there is an awful lot of talk about anal...
/r/MarriedRedPill26/08/20 05:00 PM
2

no porn, but insta THOTs get close. Its a crutch that has snuck up on me over the last few months. I need to get rid of that behavior. For now, it feels right to let myself really settle into this lower sexual desire (toward my wife) to help get rid of what remains of my unicorn thinking.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/08/20 04:59 PM
6

OYS: 27 37yo, 6’1”, 193lbs, 12%bf (Calipers). Married 9 yrs, together 12. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 320, OHP 180, Squat 310 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Swallowed the pill 9/2017, OYS since 9/2019 ​ Mental: I continue to be surprised by how much I’m not thinking about my wife. The absence is stark enough that it’s stood out to me. Not thinking about how much I want to have sex with her… and the amount of free brain bandwidth is fairly staggering…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/08/20 01:12 PM
2

OYS: 26 37yo, 6’1”, 193lbs, 12%bf (Calipers). Married 9 yrs, together 12. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 320, OHP 180, Squat 310 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Swallowed the pill 9/2017, OYS since 9/2019 ​ Mental: I continue being far, far less focused on my wife than I had been for… years of this RP process. It’s a good thing, but I’m beginning to realize how deep the dancing monkey routine went. I’m still on it, I know, since before, when I thought I…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/08/20 01:29 PM
2

Totally right.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/08/20 06:18 PM
3

When you’re failing at your goals like this, you’re never going to get momentum, and you’re not going to habituate success. Both the scope of your goals and your mindset must change. 1) scope of goals is too big. If you plan to go gym 4x and kettlebell 2x and you only do gum 2x, your goal was way too bit, in terms of habit change, than was achievable. ESPECIALLY when you have so damn many goals. Either switch to 1 real goal/week or make each goal truly achievable from a habituation pov. I bet yo…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/08/20 01:03 PM
4

OYS: 25 37yo, 6’1”, 193lbs, 12%bf (Calipers). Married 9 yrs, together 12. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 320, OHP 180, Squat 310 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Swallowed the pill 9/2017, OYS since 9/2019 ​ Mental: The last several weeks have been incredibly positive from the perspective of making myself my own mental point of origin. This time, it feels like it’s coming from a different place. I’m not reminding myself to stop giving a fuck, I’m just no…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/08/20 11:40 AM
2

OYS: 24 37yo, 6’1”, 193lbs, 12%bf (Calipers). Married 9 yrs, together 12. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 320, OHP 180, Squat 310 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Swallowed the pill 9/2017, OYS since 9/2019 ​ Mental: My mother has been visiting for the last month to help out with the kids while school is out. I’ve always had a hard time not slipping back into my old Blue Pill habits when my parents are in town. It’s been better this time, but not by enoug…
/r/MarriedRedPill21/07/20 12:26 PM
1

Then go up! Maybe you’ve got a crazy metabolism. Maybe your tracking is off. Probably the latter. Nutrition labels can be 20% off and they still meet labeling requirements. Eating this much sucks, but you’ll get used to it eventually. I target 3200 when maintaining, 3500 when bulking.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/06/20 09:44 PM
1

... I am pretty happy with my bench. Where is this homoerotic urge coming from? To never be angry? To be irrepressibly positive? To be in control of every situation? Jesus christ. Look, let me be more precise. I don't think it's possible to never be angry, and as you say, even if it were possible, it wouldn't be a good thing. I *DO* need to have better control over my emotions. That's been the case for me for a while. Early on, I needed to control my neediness, I needed to base my self-perceptio…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/06/20 09:27 PM
1

My bench and overhead press seem to be stalled at these weights right now. You weight 142 at 5'7". It's not 5x5 that's the problem. You need to eat more. You think you're eating enough, but you're not. Are you hitting 120-150g of protein / day? If not, you're not getting enough protein either.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/06/20 07:58 PM
1

OYS: 23 37yo, 6’1”, 193lbs, 12%bf (Calipers). Married 9 yrs, together 12. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 320, OHP 180, Squat 310 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Reading: Power of NOW Swallowed the pill 9/2017, OYS since 9/2019 ​ Mental: Focused on being positive, expansive, unaffected by the world. I’ve got a ways to go here. I’ll find myself angry for… no good reason. Something small that I’ve let piss me off. I’m realizing that it’s actually fairly pe…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/06/20 04:00 PM
1

Yeah, validation is part of it. Genuine desire is a joke, I agree.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/06/20 12:59 AM
1

Fair point. I still give too many fucks about what she thinks.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/06/20 12:57 AM
3

I’m stuck on anger. You’re making progress in your mental framework which is not easy to do. ...but if you think any part of the route out includes “showing your wife how much you appreciate her”, at this stage, by showering her with gifts, you’ve still got a lot of unfucking. At this stage, your gifts are, and will be seen to be, you trying to buy affection. Don’t do that.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/06/20 12:47 PM
4

No shit tests but no sex for 7 weeks? She’s stopped seeing you as disgusting but still doesn’t see you as anything worth testing for value. In her head, you’re better than before but still the unattractive bitch she thinks she’s always known. Change that.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/06/20 12:21 PM
1

OYS: 22 37yo, 6’1”, 190lbs, 12%bf (Calipers). Married 9 yrs, together 12. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 310, OHP 180, Squat 270 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Swallowed the pill 9/2017, OYS since 9/2019 ​ Mental: I feel like I’m going through a delayed anger phase. I’d never had a terribly bad one of these because I’d felt, generally, like I’d been making progress. But that feels like it’s stopped. I am angry, and while I should be angry with myself f…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/06/20 11:33 AM
1

OYS: 22 37yo, 6’1”, 190lbs, 12%bf (Calipers). Married 9 yrs, together 12. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 310, OHP 180, Squat 270 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Reading: TWOTSM Swallowed the pill 9/2017, OYS since 9/2019 ​ Physical: Continued sick gains, brah. There is no substitute for consistency, and having the gym on-site has meant I’ve been getting in workouts I’d definitely have missed in the past. Have been lean-gaining this last 6 weeks, will pr…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/05/20 11:20 AM
1

I was angry about having to lead every step here in the past. I’ve embraced that fact now though. Attraction is clearly still lacking. I think that comes, in part, from my lack of congruence, which shows to the world that some of it is still an act. I have to drive consistency.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/05/20 12:09 PM
1

Trust and sense if safety seem like important pieces of bedrock. I’d be curious how /u/HornsOfApathy went from explicit contract, including hard no’s, to no limits without breaking trust and causing panic. Or is the problem that I care at all?
/r/MarriedRedPill05/05/20 07:53 PM
1

Acta non verba. You aren't being congruent. Act ally outside the bedroom. Lead your wife there. By all accounts you say she's trying. She's trying, but still coming up with hard no's several times I've added something new to the sexual menu. Her head's not there, which I take to mean that I need to continue to build attractiveness, create other options, and demonstrate that her saying she's not interested in X doesn't change anything for me. And what does that look like to you? What is the behav…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/05/20 06:15 PM
2

Let go of which aspect? I've let go of the notion that it has to be her, but I'm not going to pretend that highly sexual behavior doesn't have to be a core part of any relationship I'm going to accept. Today, I'm working on consistently voicing what I want, and consistently doing what I want and what I know needs to be done, without spending time worrying about what others want from me. I *think* that expressing what I want from her, and not caring about how she reacts, but certainly not hiding …
/r/MarriedRedPill05/05/20 03:10 PM
10

OYS: 21 37yo, 6’1”, 190lbs, 12%bf (Calipers). Married 9 yrs, together 12. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 310, OHP 180, Squat 270 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Reading: TWOTSM Swallowed the pill 9/2017, OYS since 9/2019 ​ Physical: Home gym continues to be fantastic. I’m running Nsuns 5 day rotation, which I ran for a few months in the past. It’s very high volume, workouts take 90-120 minutes, and leave me hammered. But while I’m not commuting, while I…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/05/20 12:06 PM
2

Careful with that ego... Wouldn’t want to bruise it.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/20 06:55 PM
1

Overall I find myself laughing at the pathetic loser I used to be, and probably still am. If you're at all like me, you'll repeatedly think you've made massive progress only to be reminded of how far you have to go. That's OK. That's the process.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/20 02:57 PM
1

37yo, 6’1”, 190lbs, 12%bf (Calipers). Married 9 yrs, together 12. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 310, OHP 180, Squat 270 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Reading: TWOTSM Swallowed the pill 9/2017, OYS since 9/2019 ​ Physical: Home gym has been transformative. Workouts are 2x longer, and not because I’m streaming Pornhub to the basement. The best thing to come out of Covid is definitely going to be a fully equipped in-home iron temple. I wish I’d done it …
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/20 02:47 PM
3

Cool story bro.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/20 12:26 PM
1

OYS 18 37yo, 6’1”, 188lbs, 12%bf (Calipers). Married 8 yrs, together 11. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 310, OHP 180, Squat 270 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Swallowed the pill 9/2017, OYS since 9/2019 ​ Physical: Diligent application of facebook marketplace and lucky timing with retail orders mean I now have a fully equipped home gym. I’m light on plates and need to build a platform for the squat rack, but having the equipment in house has been fanta…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/04/20 06:16 PM
1

Agreed that frame and dread req’d, not just for this response, but in general.
/r/MarriedRedPill31/03/20 05:04 PM
1

“It doesn’t matter what I did or didn’t do, It’s what I’m doing now.” This reads like an apology. Next time be more direct: "If you're fun to be around, I'll want you around more often. Be more fun."
/r/MarriedRedPill31/03/20 01:53 PM
1

Frequency is waaaay down and I'm still getting butt hurt here and there and not initiating as punishment at times. I find myself doing this frequently. I think it's a totally reasonable response to bad behavior. Having sex with you is not for you, it's a reward for her. An orgasm is a reward. If she's behaving poorly, and you still push for sex, you're just signaling that you need it to survive, and she gains power from that. If she's behaving badly, no sex. That's all OK. The problem here is th…
/r/MarriedRedPill31/03/20 01:24 PM
1

OYS 18 37yo, 6’1”, 188lbs, 12%bf (Calipers). Married 8 yrs, together 11. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 310, OHP 180, Squat 270 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Swallowed the pill 9/2017, OYS since 9/2019 ​ Physical: I’ve been battling some wrist tendonitis, and just before our state shut down, I got a recommendation for total rest for 4 weeks. So good timing for all the weights to be locked up. I’ve been hitting cardio but need to do more. Home equipmen…
/r/MarriedRedPill31/03/20 01:17 PM
1

YNAB looks solid, I'll try it out. Thanks for the recommendation. Leg month?
/r/MarriedRedPill11/03/20 01:56 AM
2

OYS 17 37yo, 6’1”, 188lbs, 12%bf (Calipers). Married 8 yrs, together 11. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 310, OHP 180, Squat 270 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Swallowed the pill 9/2017, OYS since 9/2019 ​ Physical: Made it to the end of my cut early in Feb and have leveled out at about 188, with very little loss in strength. I’m going to start cutting again, likely this week, to try to get to sub-10 for summer. My physical appearance is a high-point fo…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/03/20 02:56 PM
1

Fair point. I’ve dug into laws in my state, and sit fine there on custody. Money is just money. What else is there to be worried about?
/r/askMRP22/02/20 10:54 PM
1

Moody dick is accurate. This is one I’ve been working on for a while, but in the moment tend to lose self awareness.
/r/askMRP22/02/20 09:03 PM
1

You’re definitely right on presence. No question.
/r/askMRP22/02/20 08:36 PM
1

I don’t think I’m afraid of not getting sex. Thats in the past. I am definitely afraid of killing the puppy. Because of my relationship with the kids, because so many other aspects of the marriage have turned so positive post-MRP. But I’m not willing to accept my current state forever, so its either improve or get out, and the latter option I am afraid of.
/r/askMRP22/02/20 05:21 PM
1

..Hey man, I opened with “I’m an autist”. I’ll be honest, recognizing IOI’s has been a longstanding challenge for me. I’m seeing some of the eye contact and smiles these days, but thats about it. Definitely basic work to do here.
/r/askMRP22/02/20 03:21 PM
2

Good reminder on I vs You. I’ve recently been filtering with whether its presented in anger (shit test) or sadness (comfort).
/r/askMRP22/02/20 03:06 PM
1

Yes, agree here. I’m trying to turn it up but she’s resisting. No talking (plenty of moaning), heavy pushback against talking dirty, etc. I had her a little ways down the road saying things she’d never said before, then a couple of months ago it was like a switch flipped and she shut up again.
/r/askMRP22/02/20 03:05 PM
1

Fine, ok, thats helpful for when to give comfort. Isnt there also a level of trust and security that is helpful in allowing her to relax and go with the flow, instead of fearing that she’s just getting pumped and dumped? How do I help her work through her fear and own issues about getting way out of her comfort zone?
/r/askMRP22/02/20 03:03 PM
1

A more concise version of my question probably could be reduced to “how do I calibrate comfort?” I got a bunch of responses on deeper issues, which is helpful but, that core question is still there. How does one know the right amount? Bitchiness is a trailing indicator. So just go sloooow and watch behavior?
/r/askMRP22/02/20 03:01 PM
1

This resonates for me. I’m realizing that as I have gotten to a point of greater abundance, really seeing for the first time in my life that I have a LOT of options, I got angry with my wife. Delayed Onset Ego Soreness? That anger has lead me to 1) be less fun but 2) withhold comfort to punish 3) recognize I may kill the puppy, which to the other comments on fear does scare me. But as you point out, theres no need to punish here. Theres nothing she can do to hurt me with that comfort (and result…
/r/askMRP22/02/20 02:56 PM
1

It was definitely neediness. Though I would argue that too much comfort lead to dry panties lead to neediness. Comfort from abundance is different, agreed.
/r/askMRP22/02/20 02:45 PM
2

Ok, yes, definitely a good reminder for me. But isnt there some point at which I can expect her to stop with the say one thing do another BS and just embrace the new power structure?
/r/askMRP22/02/20 04:41 AM
1

Sabers out, bitches.
/r/askMRP22/02/20 03:10 AM
0

Yes, probably partly knee jerk. Partly watching her one-extreme-to-the-other behavior and not trusting myself or my previous read of the situation. The Most Epic Shit Test seems to be rather timely in my thinking here. Perhaps my biggest mistake has been thinking that behavior will normalize over time, or maybe I’m still just way early in the process.
/r/askMRP22/02/20 02:52 AM
2

Man, you’re like fucking yoda these days! I would say that I’ve been missing an opportunity to provide comfort and that I’ve just created a terrified hamster with the lack of comfort I’ve been supplying. But I’m deeply distrustful of comfort because I applied it 1000% for years and it destroyed me. Ultimately, I guess its back to being my own point of origin. I think a touch of comfort will allow her to relax, put her back down, and enjoy where I’m taking her. That way, then.
/r/askMRP22/02/20 02:50 AM
1

OYS 16 37yo, 6’1”, 188lbs, 12%bf (Calipers). Married 8 yrs, together 11. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 310, OHP 180, Squat 270 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Reading: Models (again) Swallowed the pill 9/2017, OYS since 9/2019 ​ Physical: I paused my cut for a little to evaluate strength losses, and picked up a couple of pounds of water etc as I started eating at maintenance again. Nothing better than that look 3 days after you wrap a cut. Low body fat…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/02/20 03:13 PM
1

For me its been essential. All my major breakthroughs have come when I have been clear about what I want. Every time when its something big, I have a moment of fear. In the past, I always stopped there... nothing good has come from that thinking. I’m still not pushing enough. I still need to be more direct... fundamentally, I just need to be more honest.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/02/20 05:54 PM
1

I'll need to study GALNUC more closely and read Bang after I'm closer to divorce being finalized Why are you waiting, really? You've got great motivation right now (indiscretions), and you're just wasting time. Get a few numbers, and your abundance mentality will soar. And don't just read the GALNUC script. If you've come around to this new MRP mental model as much as you say you have, your freestyle will be much, much better than it used to be, and it'll be authentic, which is a turn on for eve…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/02/20 02:53 PM
1

OYS 15 37yo, 6’1”, 186lbs, 13%bf (Calipers). Married 8 yrs, together 11. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 310, OHP 180, Squat 270 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Reading: Models (again) Swallowed the pill 9/2017, OYS since 9/2019 ​ Physical: This cut is proceeding incredibly fast. I’ve cut calories far lower this time than in my previous cuts. My strength seems to be holding up, but my lifting endurance has gone to hell. Let’s see if that translates into …
/r/MarriedRedPill04/02/20 02:38 PM
1

OYS 14: 37yo, 6’1”, 188lbs, 13%bf (Calipers). Married 8 yrs, together 11. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 310, OHP 180, Squat 270 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Reading: Models (again) Swallowed the pill 9/2017, OYS since 9/2019 ​ Started a cut 3 weeks ago, down 10 lbs, targeting 185 before switching to maintenance. Hunger phase is just starting, and it’s amazing the games your mind plays with you when you start depriving it of calories. I was convinced…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/01/20 03:41 AM
2

I'm scoring 3 out of 4 on your Consequences of Low Emotionality Sex checklist: 1)relationship improvement but without much sexual improvement 2)unenthusiastic wives who resist any sexual changes 3)wives who feel emotionally disconnected and "you only want me for sex" 4)more Dread-induced bad sex that wives eventually reject, with a return to a dead bedroom or divorce. So I'll dig in here. I do think the validation seeking has been greatly reduced, but clearly that's not the only issue.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/01/20 10:58 PM
1

I don’t think I’m doing it for validation anymore. I definitely was. For me, theres a spectrum. Starfish on one end, no holds barred “I’m your toy” on the other. I enjoy exploring new things, and need a partner who’s excited to do that with me, and so clear on my value and irreplaceability that nothing is off limits. Tell me if I’m just redefining validation here...
/r/MarriedRedPill07/01/20 06:46 PM
1

What have you read on this that has been useful? When I've tried to dig in in the past on this, it's felt like a bunch of mumbojumbo. Maybe I just need to embrace the mumbo, but haven't been able to achieve meaningful results.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/01/20 04:40 PM
2

This year I intend to approach 100 times and become a master; This should be your goal for this month; seriously. If you make 100 approaches over the course of the year, we're talking 2 approaches / week. That's not an effort, that's you talking to a random person every 3 days. You should be talking to multiple new people every day. Especially now that you're finished with your marriage, you've got apps, you've got bars, you've got activity groups... if you're talking to 2 people / week, you're …
/r/MarriedRedPill07/01/20 04:17 PM
1

the only way to get rid of it is improving in every other aspect. no. In fact, improving every other aspect of your life will not remove your fear. The only way to remove your fear is to search for what you're afraid of, and go do that thing. You've got the right of it in your action plan, "keep doing things that cause me fear". This should at the top of your list of things to do.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/01/20 04:04 PM
1

OYS 13: Year in review, and goals for 2020 37yo, 6’1”, 198lbs, 13%bf (Calipers). Married 8 yrs, together 11. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 320, OHP 180, Squat 270 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Reading: Models (again) Swallowed the pill 9/2017 months ago, OYS since 9/2019 ​ So where did I start the year? • Best shape of my life, stronger than ever before, looking better than ever before. • Professionally adrift and not sure what the hell to do next • …
/r/MarriedRedPill07/01/20 01:35 PM
1

Appreciate the suggestion on #1. I think #2 you’re close. I know I’m not at this level of dominance with her yet. I have been pushing with the false belief that her saying it is so will make it so in her mind as well, and thats just not how it works. She’ll admit it once theres no other truth possible. But saying it wont make it true. And pushing her to say it will actually push her in the other direction.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/01/20 12:19 AM
1

Yes, spot on here, and of course this comes back to me. I've been wrangling bedtime with discipline, but that means that there's raised voices and counting at some point along the way. I need to act here as I have elsewhere, eliminate the raised voice for discipline, and calmly and coolly get them into bed on time. From this POV, it's 100% due to my interaction with the girls that the wife's emotional state is shit after getting kids down. Not sure how I missed this.
/r/MarriedRedPill31/12/19 07:36 PM
1

OYS 12 : The one where I realize I’ve been autistic (surprise). 37yo, 6’1”, 196lbs, 13%bf (Calipers). Married 8 yrs, together 11. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 310, OHP 180, Squat 270 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Reading: Models (again) Swallowed the pill 9/2017 months ago, OYS since 9/2019 ​ I missed two weeks of OYS over the holidays. Back in it now. ​ The last 2 months have been slow progress on lifting, but the arrow is moving up and to the righ…
/r/MarriedRedPill31/12/19 01:53 PM
5

You're a regular contributor, and I know from experience that it can feel hard to come up with a ton of meaningful stuff to say week after week, but this feels like you're mailing it in. If you're not putting enough thought into it to drum up more than 25 words per segment, are you really spending any time on introspection? if a weeks worth of your life can be summed up in 10 sentences, are you really being thoughtful with your actions in the moment? Hard to expect a ton of progress if the work'…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/12/19 08:01 PM
1

OYS 10 37yo, 6’1”, 197lbs, 13%bf (Calipers). Married 8 yrs, together 11. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 305, OHP 175, Squat 295 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Reading: Models (again) Swallowed the pill 9/2017 months ago, OYS since 9/2019 ​ General: Last week was a week like I haven’t had in… 6+ months. Failure in every category, generally united by a failure to act on my part. Not sure what the cause was, though several days of travel made everything m…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/12/19 02:27 PM
2

Career Plan : Out of this place by end of 2020 - start networking like hell in January This is way, way too long a time horizon. Find a new job in 90-120 days. anything longer and you're going to do exactly nothing for however much extra time you give yourself beyond 120 days.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/12/19 08:31 PM
1

Social This is the area I've least worked on last year. Lots of comments on sex & self image which are all spot on, but those things are going to take a while to change, and they're going to take longer to change in the way you see yourself than in the way others see you. But Social is something you can impact RIGHT NOW. I struggled here and it set me way, way back, I made a bunch of progress and then stalled for a year, and part of the reason was I let the social stuff slide. Same reasons as yo…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/12/19 08:29 PM
2

OYS 10 37yo, 6’1”, 197lbs, 13%bf (Calipers). Married 8 yrs, together 11. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 305, OHP 175, Squat 295 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Reading: Models (again) Swallowed the pill 9/2017 months ago, OYS since 9/2019 ​ ​ Physical: I’m the biggest I’ve ever been, and creeping north. Have been seeing the weight continue to move north too, which is good for motivation. I’m at an interesting spot because all my weight gain has been che…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/12/19 08:14 PM
2

WHY is this time different? What are you doing to make it different? What are you changing in your environment, and routine, and incentives to drive a different outcome? If the only thing that changes is your "commitment"... nothing will change.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/11/19 04:32 PM
1

I have tried to have *at least* 2 nights out, without my wife, per week. I typically achieve that with 1-2 work related events and 0-1 purely social items. Purely social is harder because the bloopers never feel like they can leave the house without their wives, so I typically am out at some group event, or out with a younger group of unmarried guys. I target 7-7.5 hours/night. I'm in bed around 10:30, and up at 5:45. I'm a night person, and only way I have managed to get up early, every day, is…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/11/19 04:31 PM
7

So. This is my wife. There are many like her, but this one is mine. I feel stupid that it’s taken me this long to realize that she’s more than just a sex toy and intimacy tool. I think this is natural progression. We come here because the sex is terrible, in some way or all ways. We improve ourselves, and the sex improves, and for those who really execute, you get to the point where there's no sexual challenge or frustration anymore, with your wife or anyone else. You've taken away the pain poin…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/11/19 03:59 PM
1

Social life: Was supposed to go to Toastmasters, but the wife has to go on a business trip so I’ll be with the kids at home. Don't give yourself a pass on this. I spent a year and a half making excuses for missed social outings. It's DL3 for a reason. Busy social life is foundational to any further growth. I'm still building, and to establish a more consistent group, but for me the thing that made a big difference was working to keep my calendar full 2+ weeks out. It was that further out plannin…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/11/19 03:51 PM
3

This is not owning your shit. Last week you were giving yourself a pat on the back for stopping vaping except for when you did one last time... here it is again. This is not success, this is failure. That's OK, failure is part of growth. But, for failure to drive growth, you have to admit it is a failure, examine your behavior, understand why you failed, and change the environment and your behavior to improve your odds at success the next time. What you are doing now is failing, calling it succe…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/11/19 03:41 PM
10

OYS 9 37yo, 6’1”, 196lbs, 13%bf (Calipers). Married 8 yrs, together 11. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 300, OHP 170, Squat 295 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Reading: Models (again) Swallowed the pill 9/2017 months ago, OYS since 9/2019. ​ Social: Something strange is happening here. The pill has been down for 2 years now. I can’t see a material difference is how I’m carrying myself, or how I’m acting today versus 3 months ago. But in the last month, I…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/11/19 03:21 PM
1

OYS 9 37yo, 6’1”, 196lbs, 13%bf (Calipers). Married 8 yrs, together 11. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 300, OHP 170, Squat 295 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Reading: Models (again) Swallowed the pill 9/2017 months ago, OYS since 9/2019. ​ Physical: Weight gain is back on track. Generally this is an area where I’m putting in the time, and am seeing slow but steady continued progress. I’m bigger than I’ve ever been, which is awesome and really something…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/11/19 05:43 PM
1

Point taken.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/11/19 04:48 PM
2

I am not willing to make others uncomfortable to get what I want. Example: I am super hesitant about building a social life, aka “Dread level 3” Getting comfortable here is the single most important thing you can do to advance your MRP goals. It's the ONLY thing, really. What is being "outcome independent"? What is being "self actualizing"? These can both be rephrased as "DNGAF". "I don't want to make others uncomfortable to get what I want" is THE DEFINITION of putting others ahead of yourself,…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/11/19 05:16 PM
20

OYS 8 37yo, 6’1”, 193lbs, 12%bf. Married 8 yrs, together 11. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 300, OHP 170, Squat 295 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Reading: Models (again) Swallowed the pill 9/2017 months ago, OYS since 9/2019. ​ Physical: Travel is murder for gainz, and I was on the road this week. I didn’t miss any workouts, and was eating all the time, but was 4 lbs down when I got home. Half of that is water but… more work to do to get to 200 by EO …
/r/MarriedRedPill12/11/19 02:12 PM
1

Because I wasn't willing to spin plates (inauthentic), and because I wasn't ready to end the relationship (things had generally improved, and I believed that, even when improvements had plateaued, I'd find my way back again). And, I've realized this week, because I didn't really believe in my core that there were other options. I knew, cerebrally, that I was high value, but I hadn't internalized that. I hadn't seen the proof in other peoples behavior. That's changing, but it clearly impacted my …
/r/MarriedRedPill09/11/19 04:34 AM
1

Are you supplementing w protein powder? Its hard to hit the protein goal on a cut unless you’re on a low carb diet. Just drop a scoop of whey into your morning routine. Brodin’s nectar should be a core part of your path.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/11/19 07:14 PM
3

“As soon as I get home it's drive X here, pick up Y there. Our deal is whoever cooks the other cleans, which works great, but it's another chore. Then take care of pets because wife and kids are allergic to hay (we have guinea pigs and a bird)” Why are you playing bitch to your wife and kids? Why is she telling you where to go and when? Do the kids need picking up? Own that. You decide if its important. If not, they can drop the sport/class. If its important, know the schedule and get it done wi…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/11/19 07:06 PM
1

OYS 7 37yo, 6’1”, 195lbs, 12%bf. Married 8 yrs, together 11. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 300, OHP 170, Squat 295 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Swallowed the pill 9/2017 months ago, OYS since 9/2019. ​ Physical: Lifting has been going well, with new PRs coming on several of the accessory lifts. Generally I think I’m behind on calorie intake and need to be eating even more. For a long time, I was surprised when I’d catch my reflection unexpectedly… I…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/11/19 12:45 AM
1

OYS #6 37yo, 6’1”, 193lbs, 12%bf. Married 8 yrs, together 11. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 300, OHP 170, Squat 295 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Swallowed the pill 9/17 months ago, OYS since 9/19. ​ Physical: The last 2 weeks my total weight has slid sideways but my lifts have all gone up. I’ll take it. Continuing my most consistent period for the last 2 years, with nearly 3 months of 4 workouts/week. Need to eat more Goal: Gain 0.5lbs/week up to 19…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/10/19 02:01 PM
1

This comment got me thinking differently. Super high value link, and helpful in my thinking. I have been focused on attempting to remove the need for validation completely, without a sense for how to do that aside from identifying validation seeking interactions and attempting to change my thinking around them. But it's really just the external validation that needs to be removed. I'd been attempting to create a vacuum... which is impossible. Instead, I need to shift the point of origin for that…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/10/19 04:20 PM
4

OYS #5 37yo, 6’1”, 188lbs, 12%bf. Married 8 yrs, together 12. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 300, OHP 170, Squat 295 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Swallowed the pill 23 months ago. ​ Got myself a rule 9 ban last week and then called out by /u/HornsOfApathy for paper-thin frame… I’ll call that a strong start to the week. ​ Physical: I made PRs this week on chest and back. Now doing reps with a 45 hanging for pullups, which was a fun goal to hit. It’s s…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/10/19 09:38 PM
2

OYS #4 37yo, 6’1”, 188lbs, 12%bf. Married 8 yrs, together 12. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 300, OHP 170, Squat 295 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Swallowed the pill 22 months ago. ​ Physical: Hitting the best run of consistency in the gym since I have started this process nearly 2 years ago. Havent missed a workout in 2+months. Feeling good. Back on bulking Goal: Gain 0.5lbs/week up to 198-200 by EO Jan. Family: I spent some time with my wife away fr…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/10/19 02:27 PM
2

She wants to feel like she has some control so our sex ends up being boring safe shit that we've done 1000x. Have you tried just walking away when she asserts her rules? I've done this a few times, sometimes literally saying "you've got too many rules", and it always leaves her a little shocked and hamstering on wtf just happened. That said, I was exactly where you are a couple of months ago. Nearly two years in, and feeling like sex hadn't improved in nearly a year. I resolved to just push her …
/r/MarriedRedPill08/10/19 02:03 PM
4

I really struggled to get up early in the morning Stop lying to yourself that you're trying. If you're not even able to get out of bed on time to start your day, you've got no chance at making any meaningful change in your life. You have two options: Admit you're going to fail and give up now. Go to bed early. This is the only way to get up early. Stop watching porn/ watching netflix/ playing video games / whatever the fuck else you're doing with your nights to waste your time... and go to sleep…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/10/19 01:50 PM
5

Careful with going slow when exploring new territory. She's clearly pulling you along here and wants more dominance. If you slow roll it you risk making less progress than you could before before you establish a new normal with her. This may not be you, but most recovering betas, myself included, are at least subconsciously worried about offending or getting rejected in pushing too far... and so give up gainz they could have made by pressing harder. My mantra for myself is to just keep pushing. …
/r/MarriedRedPill08/10/19 01:38 PM
1

OYS #3 37yo, 6’1”, 188lbs, 12%bf. Married 8 yrs, together 12. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 300, OHP 170, Squat 295 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Swallowed the pill 22 months ago. ​ A good week where things went well on several fronts. The biggest challenge is that I’m not keeping my goals present in my mind day-to-day, so, though I’ll very happy in the moment, I’m not as focused on making progress as I could be. ​ Physical: Got to the gym consistent…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/10/19 01:27 PM
1

OYS #2 37yo, 6’1”, 188lbs, 12%bf. Married 8 yrs, together 12. 2 kids, 5 & 3. Bench 300, OHP 170, Squat 295 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Swallowed the pill 22 months ago. Second OYS. ​ Last week’s OYS and the commentary from /u/man_in_the_world completely changed my perspective on where I am in this process. I’ve been LARPing for a long time, turns out, and have a lot of work to do. ​ Physical: In the midst of a mini-cut. I’ve found these ve…
/r/MarriedRedPill01/10/19 01:48 PM
1

Ending the validation seeking is rough (surprise, I know). First step is to recognize the behavior, but then attacking the emotions that result from gaining / failing to gain that validation feels like the really hard part. Last night I found myself angry over some slight that I perceived around the wife not checking in while traveling. I caught myself and appropriately tagged the anger as coming from not getting the validation of being needed, but that didn't help much in quashing the anger. Re…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/09/19 07:26 PM
1

it's fair. Authentic emotion, in more areas than just sex, is a challenge. More reason to get out of my own head.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/09/19 02:50 AM
1

There's a lot of room for self deception in this process, though. I've been hacking for a while, posted a first OYS this week, and but in one post, after some commentary from /u/man_in_the_world , I'm seeing where I've just been inaccurate in my self-appraisal. It's easy to convince yourself you're making progress if you're not posting.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/09/19 04:55 PM
1

Validation commentary makes sense. Wrt DEVI, I was thinking mutual, that is, mutual immersion, mutual emotionality... my dominance, of course.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/09/19 11:35 AM
1

I spreadsheeted The Dancing Monkey Metric for a year. I've always liked tracking progress... So, pushing on your point on sex as a motivator: How do you figure out whether sex is the motivator, or whether validation from sex is the motivator? High quality sex is high in Dominance, Emotion, Variety and Immersion. High quality sex is sex that your partner works hard for and is excited about.... That feels well agreed. But, if you're pushing for high emotion, and high immersion on her part and your…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/09/19 01:30 AM
1

Yeah, this one was tee'd up nicely. The boredom, or distractedness is only occasional, but it's there once in a while. I can certainly be better in bed. This takes more direct communication with her, which I've been bad at establishing because of Respectful Good Guy Validation needs... and just being afraid of rejection. I expect I'm not terrible but could definitely be much better. More importantly, I was digging through your push on validation, and ultimately got to this, which hit home on my …
/r/MarriedRedPill25/09/19 06:59 PM
1

I will 100% admit to being a *hard core* nice guy at the start of this journey. What's interesting is that I would have told you I had gotten rid of all that over the last 20 months, but with more self-examination, I think you're on point. I'm no longer doing everything for someone else (mostly my wife), which is where I started, but I still care far more than I should about her POV (hence my fear in pushing to try new things wrt sex). I have absolutely gotten rid of most of that way of thinking…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/09/19 02:58 PM
1

I have 5-6 buddies I've known for 10+ years and some work friends, but no core group of high value guys I can count on. I'm also so heads down taking action in other areas of my life and socializing at work conferences, I need to prioritize casual socializing more. This is me, too. I've tried, ineffectively, for the last 18 months to right the ship here with some success and growth, but building a core of like minded buddies is a challenge, especially because in my part of the world (costal high…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/09/19 01:34 AM
1

This is an insightful comment, and honestly, when you made the "Dancing Monkey" post a year ago, I recognized myself. I was 100% on that plan, and would have, at the time, told you that I was running MRP to improve my relationship with my wife. Your original post was an eye opener, and I worked hard, I thought, to re-evaluate my motivations and really start doing things for myself, not for my wife. re-reading your post again tonight, though, I still see a lot of myself there. The question is all…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/09/19 01:16 AM
1

OYS #1 Stats: 37yo, 6’1”, 194lbs, 14%bf. Married 8 yrs, together 12. 2 kids, 5 & 3. 1RM stats: Bench 300, OHP 170, Squat 295 Read: Rational Male, NMMNG, MMSLP, WISNFG, Book of Pook, SGM, Models, Bang, Day Bang Swallowed the pill 22 months ago. First OYS. I figured I could do it on my own, but haven’t gotten the results I need. ​ The last 20 months have transformed my self perception, my relationship with my children and my marriage. When I swallowed the pill, I was in a relationship where I was …
/r/MarriedRedPill24/09/19 02:14 PM
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