Medd37 Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
1	Honestly, how many of you in a relationship with a woman now that was hotter than your ex? My ex had a better body. But my current is so much better for my health and mind. The connection is sooo much deeper. It crazy after 14 years what I was missing out on	/r/Divorce_Men	13/04/26 08:55 AM
14	Be honest: how many of you were still attracted to your wife when you divorced? Unfortunately, yes. There's a part of me that will always love her and find her attractive. I know its irrational. However, I never want to get back together or remarry her. After a few years of self reflection, I never want a partner to treat me the way she did ever again.	/r/Divorce_Men	22/07/25 01:45 PM
1	Why is she rewarded for blowing up our family. It's got to stop. Bub..remarriage doesn't dissolve the right she has to your pension. They view it as she served time too supporting you. I will lose a chunk of mine too regardless as well	/r/Divorce_Men	04/06/25 10:37 PM
10	You might not be as appreciated as you think you are by your kids I did this as a teenager and young adult to my father. My parents divorced when I was 4. When I joined the Army at 22 it all changed. I'm much closer to my dad now moreso than my mother. And even having children and being divorced myself. I feel in the same boat. Like I'm only an atm and home a few times a year to spend as much fun time with my kids as possible. So I'm their vacation, but during the year it's like pulling teeth to get them to talk to me or FaceTime me for longer than 2 minutes. …	/r/Divorce_Men	12/02/25 12:22 AM
2	Survey: how much custody % do you have as the father? 50/50 , but I'm military and stationed halfway around the world so I only get to seem them twice a year for 15days each time. Summer and Xmas. They are too small to travel themselves and international plane tickets are very expensive	/r/Divorce_Men	03/02/25 11:58 PM
2	UPDATE Did you guys give your STBXW the courtesy of letting her know you were dating again? Soon to be ex wife	/r/Divorce_Men	02/01/25 10:34 AM
1	Any divorced military dads? Yea my dad keeps telling me get out at 19 and a half and go for medical retirement instead. I'd honestly be out already if my daughter didn't have a heart condition and need the tricare. Id much rather live closer to my kids than halfway around fhe world and still moving every 3 years. I'm at 14 years now and next PCS I'll be at 16. I'm just bitter that she went after it in general.	/r/Divorce_Men	25/12/24 11:32 AM
1	Any divorced military dads? Going to save this. We've been divorced 4 years now. She hired 2 lawyers, which I had to pay for. One normal and one that specializes in military divorces. She got a calculation sheet from the military one. I read it was like 48.33% of my high 3 which would have been E6 at 12 years. Using that table shed get like 400 a month. Still...fucked up. I don't agree with it, but my feelings on the matter don't change reality.	/r/Divorce_Men	25/12/24 11:16 AM
1	Any divorced military dads? E7 divorced at 10 years and 3 kids. Pay 1800 a month in child support and she gets 50% of my retirement when i hit 20....even though I got 6 years left. Stationed in Japan, kids stateside. I feel like an atm, but I'm still able to save and invest. Brother we just make it work	/r/Divorce_Men	25/12/24 02:05 AM
3	A whine about dating Dating in military is hard. I'm your scenario. I'm divorced mid 30s, kids with ex, and only in a location for 3 years. So if I don't meet someone the first year, i don't hold much stock. In Japan now, and the scene is ...let's say different....has pros and cons. But the biggest con is I just want to find my person. Out here is like one big orgy fest of everyone cheating on each other while married...not my cup of tea.	/r/Divorce_Men	10/12/24 03:11 AM
1	How many of you are still friends w your ex wife? This	/r/Divorce_Men	01/12/24 07:38 AM
5	Getting a vasectomy in your 40s, why it might not make sense It's a vasectomy....nut up and do it. I'm a guy, 35 and divorced. I had it done before divorce. An unplanned/unwanted pregnancy will be a hell of a lot more and painful for her. Nothing beats peace of mind. Stop your catastraphizing with looking at those percentages and do it.	/r/Divorce_Men	13/05/24 06:39 AM
3	LL wife cheat? Largely same brother, but you have lasted a lot longer than I. Mine said in 2021 that she was done. She wanted to stay married for convenience. That was 9 years married. At 10 years she dropped the paperwork. I'm military so she gets half my retirement at 10 years.... she planned it out	/r/Divorce_Men	31/03/24 10:29 PM
6	LL wife cheat? My my ex wife was the same. I couldn't physically prove it but situations wouldn't add up. It's not a LL..it's a LL for YOU. The second she's gone guess what came back? Her libido.....	/r/Divorce_Men	31/03/24 08:51 PM
1	ED after divorce Yea that's the hardest learning process to love yourself. Still working on it. Doc said today not gonna worry about ED but going to treat the depression first because I guess I failed her questionnaire and wants me to get counseling and SSRIs before worrying about that because they are probably linked.	/r/Divorce_Men	09/01/24 11:03 PM
1	ED after divorce Not really. It's hard to explain. I mean I was with my ex for over half our lives, so its hard to connect with someone new. So at first glance I look at appearance. Maybe I should just take that chance with someone that doesn't meet that criteria.	/r/Divorce_Men	09/01/24 05:47 PM
3	ED after divorce Thank you. I will. At the moment I am just struggling just going on dates. I cut off all apps for now. I've been on one date in 2 years. I'm terrible at flirting. I'm in shape, and in the military, so that's a red flag for many women. My ex was extremely attractive, so it's easy to compare on thr apps. I swipe left on MANY women because they are very overweight when they swiped on me. The ones I find attractive don't swipe on me and if they do, they ghost after 3 sentences. It's a weird situatio…	/r/Divorce_Men	09/01/24 04:29 PM
2	ED after divorce I did and yea I get it. I'm just moreso venting my frustrations to people who have gone through the same thing. I know it takes time, I'm just frustrated it's taking longer than I'd like lol. Thank you though	/r/Divorce_Men	09/01/24 03:51 PM
3	ED after divorce Damn I'm glad I'm not alone. I'm at a year and a half post divorce and same thing. With my ex full mast. With someone new can't quite perform the same. I actually sucked it up and made a doctors appointment that is actually today to talk about it. Funny thing is even if I give my ex a hug I feel it coming back. Dates with other women...nothing. I have zero desire.	/r/Divorce_Men	09/01/24 02:49 PM
2	Want to divorce wife after her affair, but don't want to see my kids less, leave house, and lose half my stuff. Damn...I divorced in Texas a year ago...wish this came sooner....no fault 10 years...she took everything and then some.	/r/Divorce_Men	19/09/23 01:06 AM
1	Relationships after marriage I'm not worried. I'm actually enjoying the peace. I am pretty fit already. I was just fooling around	/r/Divorce_Men	01/09/23 05:01 PM
2	Relationships after marriage Meh..where's no luck dating...forever alone lol	/r/Divorce_Men	01/09/23 12:03 PM
1	Is it worth it to have kids anymore? It's tough to say because her schedule can be unpredictable. Just try and work as amicably as possible and take feelings out of the equation. If it's 50/50 just work with her availability. Of course both parties being realistic in the process too. I would love more time with my babies, but can't afford it. My ex doesn't care about the boundaries set in the decree and anytime I come into town she makes sure i can have them whenever I want. The decree was more formality to us and to stipulate how …	/r/Divorce_Men	17/06/23 09:33 PM
1	Is it worth it to have kids anymore? I mean I move every few years. Currently I live in TX and them in TN. ATM it's one easy direct SW flight. Holidays are split, and I get 42 days in the summer. However I only get 30 days of leave a year, so I plan out 15 days at Xmas and 15 days during summer during the year its my Xmas. Or 5 and 25 if it's not my Xmas. Kids FaceTime whenever they want. The boys never want to talk but my daughter will call often. Fortunately letting her screw me over financially meant she atleast has never preven…	/r/Divorce_Men	17/06/23 08:34 PM
2	Is it worth it to have kids anymore? Paying a crap load of child support sucks and only getting to see my kids twice a year sucks (Army) and I move every few years. My ex wife had me get a vasectomy after the 3rd or no more hanky panky. Jokes on me. She never touched me again. Most females my age (mid 30s) either have kids or don't have kids and want them. I have zero interest in being a dad to someone's else's kids (sounds horrible) and I can't provide kids to someone else without another surgery (which I'd prefer not to go throug…	/r/Divorce_Men	16/06/23 10:32 PM
1	Why do the responsible ones end up paying? I just tell myself that it went to my kids. I guess that was my way of coping with it.	/r/Divorce_Men	07/06/23 05:06 PM
2	Why do the responsible ones end up paying? Rant away. The state of Texas said I owed $7,000. I didn't. I'm military and had a direct allotment. She even signed an affidavit saying I always paid and on time. Texas didn't care. They still submit paperwork to the government to dock my pay. Took me 6 months and I ended losing an extra 3k for paying over. Plus lawyer fees. Just to get it back down to NORMAL payments. They won't refund or reduce the 3k they already made me pay extra of. Basically tough shit....not to mention how much extra I l…	/r/Divorce_Men	07/06/23 03:02 PM
6	Is it better to marry girls who want to be SAHMs or ones who are career-oriented and “independent”? The comment below this...lol. I was married to a teacher who was a SAHM for our children. Still ended up divorced. She was unhappy, and still is unhappy having to work the school system and never has time for kids (her excuse for me never being home....karma). Teachers are overworked and under paid. Do not recommend. She is getting bitter as fuck from an over demanding school system that provides no support or materials, parents who think their precious crotch goblin is God's gift, and kids who …	/r/Divorce_Men	09/04/23 04:50 PM
5	How are we supposed to afford to live? Yes it is unfortunately. There was never a history of my ex and I. Her lawyer told her to put no corporal punishment specifically in the divorce decree to paint it as I'm signing I won't spank my kids to make me look worse. FYI I don't spank them...she's usually the disciplinarian. Also after the lawyer she added I was sexually manipulative and coercive. Because I right before the divorce we hadn't had sex in over a year. Just by me asking if she is in the mood or doing something romantic to spa…	/r/Divorce_Men	22/02/23 11:45 PM
4	What do Stay at Home Mom's "Deserve" Out of a Divorce? I'll probably get down voted because this subreddit is a circle jerk of screw the ex wife. And I'll agree on alot because I was screwed by my ex. I will say we don't know the extenuating circumstances. In this post you said the wife was urged to be a SAHM by the husband, then i say she does deserve the 50/50 split. That was a choice they made together. My own personal thing was my wife stayed with me 10 years just for half of my military pension. She said she didn't truly love me and stayed that…	/r/Divorce_Men	21/12/22 10:23 PM
2	I need advice on moving forward If you have joint custody you don't have to go back to the barracks. You will still receive BAH at the with dependent rate. How else will you be able to have split 50/50 visitation? Can't keep the kid in the barracks. I just went through a divorce, but I think I got a bit more rank than you do. Do it now if you are unhappy. You can still be in your child's life, but it'll be on your terms not hers. Right now she controls the house, so when you talk she flips out. When it's your turn for visitati…	/r/Divorce_Men	22/11/22 01:25 PM
5	How I let a woman destroy my life - 41m. Young men: Do not ever get married. Same boat. Just add 50% of my military retirement because she "stuck" it out for 10 years...I still got 9 years left before I retire from the military. Not to mention she took half my 401k(TSP). And I still pay 2k in child support. How the fuck is that fair. She had a degree and is a teacher but refused to work....why are all these my faults...but fuck me, I'll just start over from scratch and try to find a place in this market...	/r/Divorce_Men	15/11/22 04:53 AM
1	The sense of entitlement is insane - it's like she thinks we're still married! Honestly I'm not even in the other sub. I just came across this one, but I can only imagine. I would say modern day marriage is actually something to strive for and that is......a prenup.. that's modern lol. I didn't do that and I got hosed, badly.	/r/Divorce_Men	11/11/22 03:54 PM
3	The sense of entitlement is insane - it's like she thinks we're still married! Jesus, so many other men with the same shit as me. Kind of makes me feel like there is hope.	/r/Divorce_Men	11/11/22 03:33 PM
1	Best dating sites recommendations No idea tried all of them, no luck. 10 months and counting with variations of paying for the services	/r/Divorce_Men	31/10/22 04:23 PM
1	Child support “extras” - am I being petty? Idk man. My ex got 75% of my assets, 30% of my pay, and 50% of my military retirement when i retire, and wouldn't let me claim 1 of our 3 kids for taxes. And she expects all this extra stuff for birthdays etc when I'm living paycheck to paycheck when she has like no bills. Now to top it off Texas says i haven't been paying child support when I have been (since I didn't use their system) so they docked my pay and say i owe 10k. Fortunately my ex signed an affidavit saying i have been paying, but …	/r/Divorce_Men	31/10/22 04:20 PM