| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 377 | If you've known him for a long time, vet him even harder! | REMINDER 👑 | Melodic_Novel6309 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/11/21 04:59 PM |
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 19 | If you've known him for a long time, vet him even harder!Ew. Getting your own transportation to a date is "new age"? I have a theory we look past these mens' issues because we've been constantly bombarded by the "friends to lovers" trope in TV & movies. Like, if it worked out, wouldn't it be nice? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/11/21 09:34 PM |
| 12 | If you've known him for a long time, vet him even harder!Thanks for the kind words :) He's been blocked & deleted! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/11/21 09:30 PM |
| 2 | FDS-approved TV, movies and books?I also really liked The 100 if you're into sci-fi. It starts out a little young-adulty with some awkward pick-me moments, but all the characters -- especially the women -- grow really well and have more important things to worry about than lusting after men. All the women in that show end up being leaders in politics, warfare, medicine, mechanics, etc. And the writers don't treat being in a relationship as the end goal in life. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/11/21 04:34 PM |
| 123 | Its movies like this one where women is made out to be bad person even thought she is 100 percent correct is why men have the entitled view that they do.It's gotten to the point where if a guy absolutely adores Adam Sandler, I think 🚩🚩🚩 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/11/21 04:24 PM |
| 72 | Men tend to complain about women being fatter in person vs. their dating app pics... Well in my experience TOO 👏 MANY 👏 MEN 👏straight up LIE about their heightAlmost the same thing happened to me! He wasn't in a wheelchair but had a disability where he couldn't grow more muscles in his leg & was limping. His profile was all just headshots of him at various angles. Since then, I'll swipe left on anyone who doesn't have any photos of their full body. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/10/21 04:29 PM |
| 137 | Men tend to complain about women being fatter in person vs. their dating app pics... Well in my experience TOO 👏 MANY 👏 MEN 👏straight up LIE about their heightVetting strategy for #6 -- if all photos are "artsy" in some way (only showing him in profile, darkness, with sunglasses, etc.) then chances are he's hiding something & trying to portray himself cooler than he actually is. There should be at least 1 photo of his full face, eyes visible, and smiling. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/10/21 04:22 PM |
| 4 | quick and easy ways to vet: how to tell there is a mask in the first placeLOL @ Spreadsheet Scrote. 100% with you. There's a high likelihood that these kinds of guys will often ask, at the end of the date: "So, we going to see each other again right?" Translation: "Have I passed this interview round?" | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/10/21 04:17 PM |
| 1 | If he has to verbally ask for exclusivity, it's a TRAP. If was his job to make himself a space in your life, not yours.Yeah.The title is confusing. At some point you do need to verbalize and what you are. If you never have the conversation, you're dealing with a "let's not put labels on it" kind of LVM. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/10/21 06:28 PM |
| 165 | Pickmes and 🤡🤡🤡: “If you are so picky, you are going to be single forever.”"Only I, and men like me, can cure you from the disease that is singlehood." | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/10/21 06:25 PM |
| 9 | Let's talk about why women have sex with men they don't really like and/or are not attracted toIn my pick me days, I would think exactly along those lines. I'd think that any male attention is good attention and that if I didn't end up at least making out, it was a "failed night" or I'd be "losing my charm." Oh and then throw alcohol into the mix... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/10/21 05:16 PM |
| 23 | Thank you FDS for making dating fun and enjoyable again!I love this! Thank you for bringing some optimism into my day :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/10/21 05:09 PM |
| 56 | quick and easy ways to vet: how to tell there is a mask in the first placeThe never disagreeing thing really rings alarm bells on my BS meter now! I think there's a variant of masking behavior that just points to desperation for a girlfriend. And along those lines, I would add: You slowly catch him telling little white lies that seem to be for your benefit. Eg. A guy wanted to walk me home because "it's conveniently on the way" only I knew the area he lived in & it was the complete opposite direction. Why lie? If you meet on OLD (which I know is not approved by everyo… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/10/21 05:06 PM |
| 5 | If you notice yourself wishing you could give a man “the benefit of the doubt”, it’s your sign to DROP him. You’re TOO invested & that just won’t do.Oh it gets worse. He keeps so engaged on text & social media, not wanting to go more than 2 days without contact. So I think it's actually all of the above! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/09/21 12:36 AM |
| 111 | If you notice yourself wishing you could give a man “the benefit of the doubt”, it’s your sign to DROP him. You’re TOO invested & that just won’t do.A very apt reminder for me! I've recently found myself wondering why a guy acts very uninterested in me when we're around a group of people. I was giving him so much benefit of the doubt -- telling myself things like "oh maybe he just doesn't want to scare me away." Honestly, I think it's a psychological defense mechanism for the actual truth -- he doesn't really care that much! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/09/21 05:05 AM |
| 15 | So I'm deleting my Facebook. A strategy?If you do want to keep using social media, there are some other options too: Block and delete. Alternatively, set up permissions so that only select groups of people can see your posts. Facebook allows you to pre-define groups for this and Instagram has the "close friends" option. I found this to be a reasonable compromise between not feeling like meat but also being able to enjoy the benefits of social media as I see them. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/08/21 02:49 PM |
| 51 | Ohio man charged in 'Incel' plot to kill women in OSU campus mass shooting. (Funny that this sub is often labeled misandrist, yet when has a woman ever decided to wipe out 3,000 men because she was unhappy with her sex life?)If you've ever watched BoJack, there is an episode with that exact plot: Women end up mass-buying guns in order to feel protected against men. Soon after, they finally pass stronger legislation restricting firearms. One of the characters comments: "I can’t believe this country hates women more than it loves guns" | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/21 06:13 PM |
| 4 | Love and Dating after FDSI think the question is: What does deep connection mean, and is it a requirement for in a relationship? From my observations, people have very different answers to this question. For some, enjoying your time together, being attracted to each other and compatible lifestyles is enough. Others need something more than that and I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting that. Personally, I am more likely to feel excited when I'm with someone who's as self-reflective as I am and is always work… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/21 05:04 PM |
| 5 | Tonight’s ‘The Bachelorette’Greg seems a bit too melodramatic for me. He's always complaining about how uncomfortable he is. It's almost like he's annoyed he has to compete, and he almost reads to me as angry at Katie for putting him through this. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/07/21 03:32 AM |
| 314 | This is how you savagely troll an insecure egoTangentially: Why is he doing clap pushups to remedy this? That's not even targeting the right muscle groups in the same way that situps, crunches, or other abdominal work would. (This might be why he only has 3-pack...?) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/07/21 12:22 AM |
| 2 | Weekly FDS Check-inIn one of the latest podcast episodes, they even talked about how it could be a good thing because, at the very least, it gives you practice in using the FDS principles. Plus, it could be a good tool for multi-dating. I remember in my pickmeisha days, I'd make SO many excuses for these poor OLD profiles, end up matching with them, and go on these awful dates. Now, it's actually very encouraging when I feel no guilt at just swiping left & being extremely picky. It's a good yardstick to measure pr… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/07/21 08:41 PM |
| 18 | If this is not ultimate FDS energy I don’t know what is 🤣It's also the setup of John Tucker Must Die! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/07/21 05:55 PM |
| 23 | Targeting👏Young👏Girls👏Is👏Wrong👏"Age is just a number" is one of the biggest lies people fall for. Age highly correlates with experience & maturity. Isn't it even well studied that the prefrontal cortex matures at age 25? :( | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/07/21 03:40 PM |
| 10 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-InI love Dr. Ramani so much. She such a kind and sweet soul & I wish her well for her healing journey. It made me tear up watching that. BTW I'd LOVE to see Dr. Ramani on the FDS Podcast, so if anyone involved with that sees this, consider this my request to try to reach her :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/06/21 12:53 AM |
| 6 | So I wanted to share this artists work with you ladies- Stop Telling Women to Smile is an art series by Tatyana Fazlalizadeh. Her work attempts to address gender based street harassment.Does anyone remember "That's Not My Name" by the Ting Tings? Same vibes as #5 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/06/21 05:04 PM |
| 18 | If you're still using dating apps, you're a pickmeI deleted mine before I found FDS. My personal breaking point: My roommate had gone out on what she said was an awful date. He was a rude intellectual who under-tipped the waiter in a show of dominance & completely misread her disinterest when he tried to go in for the kiss. She was literally laughing at how bad it was, and at how entitled he was. Lo and behold -- I see the same guy on my Hinge the next day. Cherry on top: Hinge apparently thought that we were "super compatible" and was edging m… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/06/21 09:48 PM |
| 23 | We Ain’t Settling For Less Over HereIt's the audacity for me. I will never forget the first time a dude told me "no offense, but you're kind of a boring bitch" when I refused to engage with him in a club. After his apparent shock & anger wore off, he proceeded to put something into my drink when he thought I wasn't looking. I saw and just NOPE'd out of there... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/06/21 11:04 PM |
| 148 | Once again, All of Reddit vs. FDSLOL yeah it's comical how they get to incel. It's quite the opposite. This sub has helped me understand that it's better to be single than to be a part of an abusive relationship. FDS gives us courage to break up with abusive partners -- which means many women here are already in relationships. So it's a voluntary action to break up, and one that can take a lot of courage especially if safety is threatened. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/06/21 10:35 PM |
| 51 | Since some people seem to think we mean “very wealthy” when we say High ValueTotally agree! Anyone who is equating value with wealth is missing the point & playing into capitalism/patriarchy (which IMO are very intrinsically linked). Like you mentioned, the right definition of value is competence and it just happens to be that competence correlates with wealth. It's a huge difference though because of the exceptions. For eg, I wouldn't call a billionaire tech CEO like Elon Musk high value at all. And on the other hand, some hard working PhD students might be high value e… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/05/21 05:37 PM |
| 233 | OopsYup! LVM want us to look pretty without any effort. That's why they think makeup is "cheating" LVM Logic: if you spend an hour doing your makeup, how will you have time to look pretty when I give you all this extra work?? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/05/21 05:27 PM |
| 48 | Keep SlayingHmm I feel iffy about this as a strategy. In this case, it's great; nurturing achievement & drive is great no matter the gender of your child. However, I've seen fathers take it too far by discouraging their daughters from embodying any stereotypically feminine qualities. I guess that's a disagreement between lib fem & rad fem. Lib fem wants equality by treating more women like men. But I'd love to be in a world where I don't have to be more masculine (or enjoy stereotypically masculine things) … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/05/21 05:21 PM |
| 49 | Let's keep going against the system Queens!I've some LVM who say they're thankful but don't want to do anything more than show appreciation. It's all for show. "Wow, honey, I'm so grateful for all these beautiful meals you cook. Truly blessed." "Do you want to help with the dishes ?" "Stop nagging me about that, woman!" | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/05/21 07:53 PM |
| 183 | Let's keep going against the system Queens!This happened in my family at a smaller scale. My mother cooks every day and it was just "meh, this is everyday healthy food we all have to eat." Then, my dad would come in every once in a while with a fabulously fancy one-off meal to steal the show. It wasn't until I was older that I realized that it's much harder to cook consistent, healthy meals. Meanwhile, anyone can make a fancy meal once-in-a-while by finding a recipe & following instructions. Plus, I noticed my dad never cleaned up. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/05/21 07:50 PM |
| 145 | Hmmm.. I wonder why this is?There might be a bias with how they're collecting the data. Women (such as my past self) might be over-reporting orgasms if they don't really know what orgasms are & just respond "yes" if they've felt any kind of pleasure. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/05/21 07:45 PM |
| 32 | Most accurate representation of single men - courtesy of Man Seeking WomanAnd... right on queue there's a comment from some pickmeisha about how it's so sad he's suffering from love & how she'd want to be more than GF for him, and some dude wondering why there aren't more girls like her. Yes, it's sad (on BOTH sides) to suffer after a breakup. Why can't they see that the solution isn't to mope around around waiting for someone else to make you better? If everyone did that, we'd have a bunch of mopey people in the world. Get help! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/05/21 06:55 PM |
| 198 | "Sit down with him and have a conversation"Oh! I have an answer to this paradox: They see themselves as robots. They're supposed to be good at STEM, but need to be fed explicit instructions (like programming) in order to understand basic human decency. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/05/21 01:47 AM |
| 203 | Men still harass us no matter what we wear cause it doesn't change what they know we have underneathI was still catcalled yesterday for daring to wear a nice dress since it's getting warmer nowadays. They just move on from your face to your body. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/05/21 01:44 AM |
| 83 | Couldn’t agree more 🤍I'm trying this thing where I'm consciously trying to catch myself every time I'm mentally making a judgement about another woman, and making sure I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt. Divorced woman who's fighting hard for custody? Assume she has good reason to "Crazy" woman who ran away from home? Assume something bad must have happened to make her do this. Naggy girlfriend who's got a guy down? Assume she's asking for reasonable things. Now, given more information, it's possible my feeling… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/05/21 12:28 AM |
| 33 | Dear Scrotes, children aren’t trophies 🏆 🙄First of all, Bob, you work in Accounting. Calm down. Literally spat my water out when I read this 😂 It could be some remnant of a dynastic or aristocratic historical viewpoint. Somewhere along the lines, we decided that what kings & queens were doing, everyone has the right to, even Bob the Accountant. Fun test: If a man badly wants a kid, bring up the possibility that you should give the kid your last name and see what he says. LVM will put up a fight, citing either tradition, the kids' mental… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/05/21 12:21 AM |
| 18 | The Female Dating Strategy Podcast: EP. 10 - Boomers, Coomers, & Consumers: What Went Wrong with Male SocializationLoved this ep! You recommended we stay out of the manosphere for our own sanity, but also that you go on it now that it's kind of part of your job. That gave me an idea for a future episode request: Could you do an episode on how you maintain your sanity knowing what's out there? I am super grateful for finding FDS & feel much better set up take control of my life. And yet, I'm increasingly disappointment by friends, family and coworkers -- not to mention general awful comments on social media l… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/05/21 01:06 AM |
| 14 | Billie Eilish and the teenager to Sex Symbol pipelineI recognize the cognitive dissonance. I make an explicit distinction between policing someone and disagreeing with them. I also feel wrong about policing other women. Billie can do whatever she wants, and I have no right to be demanding that she does something. However, it's also within my right to disagree with what she's doing. Just because a woman chooses to do something of her own volition* doesn't make it empowering. *Within the context of the patriarchy and internalize misogyny, which affe… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/05/21 05:37 PM |
| 24 | Ghosted? Supreme Pickme Has a Solution 🤡Yes! This is where the article author lost me. I see this happen a lot where women will want to prioritize getting back at an ex/LVM/scrote over their own sanity. I really get it; I've had revenge fantasies too. But it's seriously NOT worth your time. Like, who cares if he wanted something? Take his wants out of the equation and focus on YOU. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/05/21 04:50 PM |
| 18 | The Female Dating Strategy Podcast: EP. 9 - We Like Big Dicks and We REFUSE to LieIn your podcast you asked an open-ended Q about all the ladies who have ever said "yes" when a man asks "did I make you come?" Reporting in here! I've responded "yes" before I even knew what an orgasm was; I didn't actually orgasm for at least 3 years after first being sexually active, and that too, I feel like I am lucky. I thought orgasms were just the mildly pleasurable feelings. Then when I really had an orgasm, I felt light headed and my legs started shaking. So now this is my logic: If he … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/05/21 01:52 AM |
| 94 | good morning <3Yeah I always had a major disconnect with these libfem notions. I think it's 2 things: A cope. Since they can't change society themselves, they decide to learn to like objectification to feel better A wish fulfillment. Maybe in a totally different universe without a history of patriarchy & misogyny, it would be empowering. But we live in the real world, where men cheer on women's empowerment only when it's advantageous for them (see: OnlyFans). | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/05/21 04:11 PM |
| 7 | Weekly FDS Check-InIt's hilarious how often I'm seeing Reddit slot in Ads for OnlyFans in this sub 😂 like their targeting is SO OFF. In this particular ad, a woman is going to confront her husband about watching OnlyFans but he teaches her that the site has so much other content besides porn. I find it's a fantastic case study! Here is a LVM watching porn on OnlyFans, but now he has a convenient excuse to give to his wife. Take note! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/05/21 08:40 PM |
| 163 | 20% of women in China regret getting married. Only 7% of men regret getting married. 73% of divorced are initiated by women. Marriage has always been an institution meant to benefit men. More and more women are realizing this.I've had nightmares about walking down the aisle, either being forced to or forcing myself to marry some guy I'm very neutral about. Before FDS, I used to think something was wrong with me. Wasn't I supposed to be dreaming and planning my perfect wedding? Funny how the tables have turned now. I've heard of so many marriages falling apart recently. Seems like my nightmares are statistically more accurate than any fantasies. It's something I've always kind of known deep down, but I was called craz… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/05/21 08:24 PM |
| 28 | LVM trying to keep you from raising your valueMy ex wasn't super happy about his job, and at the time I wasn't either. However unlike him, I was actively interviewing for new positions. He wasn't doing anything, and would keep bringing my down by asking "why do you care so much? A job can just be a job you know. Take the paycheck and then do other things that make you happy!" I almost fell for it. I realized that not only was he projecting based on his current situation, but he had major regrets in his past about letting some opportunities … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/05/21 08:15 PM |
| 24 | Thoughts on changing your name when you get married?PLUS, I'd want to consider giving any future child my last name, if I decide to have/adopt children. Maybe we can trade off if we have/adopt more than one, or we could hyphenate, or come up with some other compromise. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/05/21 05:09 PM |
| 10 | I'm a therapist and I can't do couples counseling anymoreI'd be so interested to hear this too! The entire premise of couples counseling seems to be on fixing the relationship. Also curious to hear OP's perspective on the couples counseling industry. Would it be likely to change & normalize the idea that the best course of action might just be to break up? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/04/21 01:39 AM |
| 3 | I got my coworkers to tell on themselves; a translation of the male mindI had a co-worker who was ostensibly a "catch" (pulling in 6 figures, Ivy-league educated, tall, conventionally handsome, soft spoken, etc.) But after he got engaged, he started revealing things to us that made me really hate him as a person: He didn't want to make a big deal out of his wedding bc he wasn't sure it was gonna last. "I'll just let her do everything. It's her moment to shine anyways." His fiance got sick and didn't have time to put on make up or work out. He admitted to us "Attract… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/04/21 04:49 AM |
| 17 | OnlyFans is an experiment in mass grooming teens into a Sex Work Pyramid Scheme, for which most of them will NEVER see more than $180Yeah, this would basically revert any profit they're making in the first place (and then some) Just like NVM, I guess we have NVS (negative value site)? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/04/21 11:35 PM |
| 9 | Always, ALWAYS trust your intuition... It could save your lifeThis can also apply to people close to him (friends & family) Once I met the dad of one of my guy friends (we were all in college & the dad was visiting). I got really creepy vibes from the dad. I swear he was checking me out when I wasn't looking. But was told that "he's just shy and awkward." To this day, I have no idea what's up with the dad but I later discovered that his son (my "friend") had really misogynistic views. The son currently LVM who's shamelessly cheating on his girlfriend, maki… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/04/21 07:09 AM |
| 30 | Low effort meme but it's for LVM soLol another anecdote: LVM I knew once microwaved a chicken breast (no seasoning) and ate it with peanut butter. It was his version of "Thai peanut chicken" 🤦🏽♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/04/21 07:03 AM |
| 31 | Nick Miller from New Girl was the worst NVM on TV. The entire sitcom is about the emotional immaturity of men, and this dude represents the worst of our culture. Join me in listing the reasons why he’s the worst. 1. Who dumps Megan Fox in a train????There's an episode where he decides to actually try and further his career. His ambition & renewed life purposes becomes really attractive to Jess, and he responds by calling her a gold digger. "WhY DiDN't YoU LIkE mE WHeN i WAs POoR." I gotta hand it to the writers on that one -- that is exactly how a LVM would respond. The one and only plot point I like is that he doesn't really end up in anything long term until he gets his shit together. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/04/21 05:33 PM |
| 14 | Let's continue waking up queens! 😊Oh how I wish I had come across content like this when I was younger. I personally never grew up dreaming of a wedding because I'm not white, so I didn't know whether to dream of a classic Western wedding or a wedding from my culture. "It would depend on the guy I marry " I'd say. It gives me major whiplash now because even in my imaginary non-wedding wedding, I was deferring to some unknown hypothetical guy 🤦🏽♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/04/21 07:38 AM |
| 70 | Why are so many of them OBSESSED with heightMy theory: Because heights and dick sizes are both (relatively) unchangeable, it gives men a convenient way to play the victim card forever. In my experience, guys who play this card are also very lacking in emotional intelligence, and it's the lack of empathy that's actually getting in the way. I have even tried pointing out some counter-examples to a former male friend of mine. I'd point out multiple guys who were 5'4''-5'7'' who had no problems. For each and every one, he'd come back with exc… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/04/21 07:34 AM |
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