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Mesothelioma1021 Archive

View 4 posts and 62 comments by Mesothelioma1021 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Was going to post something similar. Once my divorce finalized I hit the gym hard because, like you, I wanted to focus on bettering myself. If you’re in reasonably good shape and well groomed…women notice. My first serious fling post divorce was with a 24 year old, and I was 34 at the time. I’m dating a 28 year old now. Most women don’t give a shit if you’re divorced. I’ve only encountered a few who did, but it’s a small minority.
/r/Divorce_Men17/07/25 07:30 AM
4

Dude I’ve been there; I left my ex-wife as soon as I discovered her texting another guy from work, but truthfully I had fallen out of love with her well beforehand so the sting might not have been as bad for me…it was a good reason to leave her instead “she’s an asshole”. It sucks, but you’ll survive. Ignore that twat and focus on you and your daughter.
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/24 10:20 PM
5

Then why care she’s texting other guys? Remind yourself you’re better than she is because you are focused on what’s best for your daughter, while she’s focused on the next guy to blow her back out.
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/24 10:12 PM
27

Don’t care; text other women. 95% of women you meet, like most people in general, are completely disposable. Your soon to be ex-wife isn’t any different.
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/24 10:02 PM
3

Stop. This affair would still be ongoing if the affair partner had not been caught by his wife.
/r/Divorce_Men05/11/24 09:46 PM
10

I got divorced last year at 33 with no kids; you’ll be fine. Did you own any property? Dating has been fun for me; I’ve hooked up with girls anywhere from 21 to 38. You’re more aware of red flags early on, ones you may not have noticed in the past. Focus on yourself and you’ll be good.
/r/Divorce_Men04/07/24 01:21 AM
13

I feel the same way. I’m a nurse so I work alongside a lot of women, most of which I like quite a bit. Many are devoted to their partners. Some are married, or have been married, to some real slimebags. I was bitter for many months following my discovery of my ex-wife’s affair, but in a lot of ways working with these women reminded me that there are plenty of good women out there. Be careful picking your partners, guys. Christ, even with some girls I’ve been seeing casually, once they start exhi…
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/24 12:33 AM
1

That’s a weak excuse. I started working out hard back in late September and by February I noticed a difference in how women interacted with me at work - I’m a nurse and surrounded by women at work. Get in shape. Also, always be well groomed. I take time to make sure my hair looks nice & my beard is trimmed in the morning; make sure you wear clothes that fit you well. Little things like this go a long way.
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/24 12:19 PM
2

Getting her out of my life was a fair trade; I would have just hawked it anyway.
/r/Divorce_Men03/06/24 11:47 PM
2

My ex-wife insisted on keeping and added that as part of our settlement lol. $6k down the tubes; my guess is she hawked it.
/r/Divorce_Men03/06/24 03:37 PM
4

Gym, work, therapy, and trying new thing (for me it was rock climbing & yoga).
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/24 10:50 AM
2

Then clean up your diet
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/23 10:43 PM
2

I don’t think it’s a cure all, but there are many benefits to it. It keeps me regimented with my diet and time. My divorce sucked, but I couldn’t let it drag me down anymore after a few months, and busting my ass at the gym the last 4 months has really helped a lot. Sometimes just knowing you look good in your clothes can make you feel a lot better. Even if you’re not lifting weights, having a healthy diet, not drinking or using drugs, getting enough rest, and staying active are key to building …
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/23 01:21 PM
3

You may get a higher percentage of men filing on this sub. My STBXW is the one that filed even though we agreed to the divorce mutually. My ex cheated and there was no coming back for either of us.
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/23 11:38 AM
5

She’s confused because there is another guy in the picture. Another poster already said this, but I can almost guarantee the emotional affair has escalated into a physical one since your separation. I had a very similar situation as you.
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/23 10:50 PM
7

Mine did the same
/r/Divorce_Men17/07/23 12:16 PM
25

Don’t be content with being Option B
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/23 01:53 PM
1

Apparently it could fall under terroristic threat
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/23 02:10 PM
3

He’s been very helpful and he said he’s going to see to it that she drops everything as part of our settlement agreement. If she drags it out to court it will be bad for her.
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/23 11:01 PM
6

After I uncovered my wife’s affair, I threatened to beat the guy she was cheating on me with. Obviously this was not wise, I let my emotions get the best of me and it was stupid. To make it worse, the guy recorded me threatening him. This guy was my soon to be ex’s subordinate and she had feared me telling their HR department about the relationship. She threatened me that if I were to disclose this to HR, that he and she would have me arrested for the violent threats I made. She also said she’d …
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/23 05:43 PM
14

You need to hire a pitbull of an attorney to fight these false allegations. I’m not quite in the same boat, but my stbxw claims in a PFA order that I grabbed her by the neck when I “accused” her of having an affair with a “friend” from work. The reality is I caught her and she admitted to it. This is complete fabrication and I won’t allow her to paint me as some batterer when I’ve never laid a hand on her. I have a high priced attorney to help me with my case.
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/23 03:57 PM
3

I know man, I had the same thing. Can’t get through a day where I don’t think about the texts my soon to be ex sent her coworker. It sickens me.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/23 03:15 PM
3

Most women are 5’5 and below, so you being 5’10 to them is no issue.
/r/Divorce_Men27/06/23 10:54 AM
1

Yeah I think a lot of this is just retaliation on their part for their employment issues; which they were ultimately responsible for anyway. Did you pursue the simple assault charge, or did you not view it to be worthwhile? I’m sorry you went through that. I moved back to PA myself after my marriage fell apart in Florida.
/r/Divorce_Men24/06/23 05:46 PM
34

Not trying to salvage our marriage after I discovered her affair. The fucking creep dragged me through marriage counseling while continuing her affair. I should have served her the day I found out.
/r/Divorce_Men23/06/23 06:12 PM
4

Yeah today has sucked, tomorrow will be better. Kind of has to be, I’m a cardiac nurse and can’t risk killing a patient.
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/23 12:27 AM
1

Was just recommended this today
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/23 12:19 AM
3

Going through the same shit bro. I’ve only been married 8 months too. Even after I discovered she was having an affair, I initially blamed myself. I heard the same thing, “I thought things would get better after the wedding”…I didn’t know things were bad. I’ve been the same guy for almost 7 years, she just got bored. I’d get over being short. My best friend is 5’5 and has never had issues dating very attractive women, but he keeps himself in tip too shape.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/23 02:56 AM
1

I would the median age for my matches is around 31; though I get some girls in their late 20s as well.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/23 02:25 AM
1

Yeah I find the women on those to be more interested in meeting up, also a higher population of women 25 and older (I’m 33).
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/23 01:07 AM
0

People saying this is hard to believe probably aren’t putting themselves out there enough, or aren’t as active on OLD. I’m not ready to date, but I got on the apps just to see what’s out there, and I’ve gotten well over 100 matches in a month on bumble and hinge, and have talked to plenty of women. Only a handful of which had children. If you’re 30+ and still have your hair, a decent career, and are even in mildly good shape you’ll get matches.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/23 11:15 PM
3

I find bumble and hinge to be better, honestly.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/23 11:11 PM
25

She cheated on you, she didn’t respect you, and when the “butterflies” fade with this guy, she’ll cheat on him too. Focus on you, and what you can control. Enjoy spending time with your parents, and your children on the weekends. I’m sorry you’re going through this. I’m back with my parents too after my soon to be ex wife cheated on me with an engaged man, who has no future with her. It sucks, it hurts, but try to find little victories when you can. I had a good day at work, had a nice workout, …
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/23 02:35 AM
11

Don’t go on a date until you’ve healed a little more. I went on a date last Saturday and it ended up bumming me out. I kept thinking about all the dates my STBXW and I went on early in our relationship. I like using the dating apps just for validation purposes, and getting back into the habit of talking with women. Maybe try that first to experiment, but if you click with someone, see where that goes. Sorry you’re going through this, man.
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/23 10:07 PM
12

My wife cheated on me and told me she had checked out…literally 8 weeks after our wedding; I didn’t discover the affair until April. Divorced was filed in mid May.
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/23 02:06 PM
-2

Go right ahead lol
/r/Divorce_Men03/06/23 04:30 PM
4

It’s Florida
/r/Divorce_Men03/06/23 04:21 PM
-4

I can DM you proof
/r/Divorce_Men03/06/23 03:48 PM
5

AP was a subordinate, it’s likely they were sneaking off during work hours. HR will be checking time sheets and camera footage for the time period of the affair. I won’t owe any alimony, we were only married 8 months.
/r/Divorce_Men03/06/23 02:28 PM
3

We got no where with it, but our relationship was a very dire place by the time we started, so I’m sure that played a role. My ex wife got the impression judged her (she had an affair), and thought the MC had a thing for me based off an outfit she wore to a session.
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/23 04:50 PM
1

My wife filed after 2 months of separation, but that was because she knew I was going to file. I think I knew I was not going to ever forgive for her infidelity even though I wanted to. My biggest motivation was to not start all over, but that is not worth it in the end. My therapist told me I shouldn’t fear being single and I could get dates if I put myself out there. I’m not on bumble or tinder to start dating, but to get back in the habit of talking to women. I’ve been lucky in avoiding bots,…
/r/Divorce_Men26/05/23 03:50 AM
1

I hear you, man. My STBXW constantly threatens to press charges against me for threatening her affair partner. Apparently I just need to suck it up and let her control the narrative. Hope you can gets what you want out of your divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/23 08:18 PM
1

Right, I remember it well. The last time I was single I was 26, and it was such a pain in the ass. I’d imagine, maybe I’m just hoping, women 27 and up are a little more motivated to meet up.
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/23 06:19 PM
3

Moved from a 2 bedroom/2 bathroom 1100 sq foot apartment in downtown Miami back to my parents place in PA.
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/23 05:25 PM
1

They do and I think my wife was for a while, until she wasn’t. My love blinders missed some red flags along the way; I wish I had acknowledged them earlier, but here we are. I think I’ll start dating in a few months once I’m in a better place, but it’s nice knowing there are women out there who are interested in what I bring to the table.
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/23 02:56 PM
3

I’m doing the same dude. Work on yourself and everything will fall into place.
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/23 01:55 AM
2

Oddly enough my STBXW is 31, soon to be 32. I figured she must really have checked out to throw everything away right now given she wants 2-3 kids.
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/23 01:45 AM
8

I’m sorry man
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/23 01:09 AM
3

That’s how I view it too, she knew all long she was done, hence why she had an affair.
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/23 10:16 PM
3

Well I’m living with my parents for the next 4 months to get my finances in order after my wife pissed away most of our money on frivolous shit. No sense trying to bringing a women back to my parents place at 33. I’m also not completely over my STBXW, but I’m getting there.
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/23 08:41 PM
5

Im not sure if I necessarily forced her, but I got the feeling during my attempt to reconcile that she was just stringing me along. When I got more direct about doing a marriage intensive. When she told me she didn’t think it would make a difference, I couldn’t help but tell her I wasn’t surprised. Given her best friend cheated (like my wife) and just did some marriage counseling just to say she did it before filing, and her mother cheated on her husband and didn’t bother to reconcile with her f…
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/23 08:34 PM
3

It helps that I live in a major metro area and I used a wide age range (24-38), though most of matches seem to be around 31. I wish I was a giga chad, more of my conversations would be going somewhere. Then again my motivation to actually see these women isn’t there; I just want to know I can get matches and that they could lead to dates.
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/23 07:31 PM
2

It has been a nice confidence boost. My wife fucked with my head by sexting a coworker and sending them nudes. Doing this has helped me feel secure in that I know I won’t be alone, unless I choose to be. I don’t plan on pursuing anything for the next few months though, I need to work on myself.
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/23 07:07 PM
4

It’s a no fault state, and we’re separated by 1500 miles. I’m not pursuing anything, just getting an idea of what’s out there once I’m ready to pursue something.
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/23 07:02 PM
4

I feel for you man. When my STBXW called me, of course she didn’t have the balls to talk in person, to tell me she was unhappy it stressed me out and really curbed my appetite. I’ve lost 20 lbs since then, which was February, and I’m back in my 32W pants. I hate that this is the way I lost weight though.
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/23 03:50 AM
1

You're right. I guess what frustrates me is that I know how she is portraying this her little fan club. One of the problems in our relationship for a while was her weird attachment to her mother & step dad. She is their golden child who can do no wrong, and butter her ass at every opportunity. To them I am some psycho who wildly flipped out because their precious baby was "talking" to some guy at work.
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/23 12:50 PM
1

I got very angry but never came close to hitting her, nor did I threaten to hit her. Yeah cursing her out and threatening her AP was not great, but I’ve never felt so primal before. She wanted out before if I had to guess, hence the affair; my reaction just provided her an out to sell to her friends and family.
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 04:28 PM
2

I think I’m just pining for the person she used to be and not what she is now. She succeeded in making me the bad guy despite her having an affair. She filed so there is no more ambiguity.
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 12:24 PM
1

It’s over, she filed. I couldn’t file until October because I moved out of state and where I am required 6 months of residence before filing.
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 12:17 PM
1

We worked the same hours only as a nurse I only worked three 12’s. But you’re first point is correct I think. She claimed to be afraid of me and it’s bullshit.
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 12:14 PM
1

I believe it’s over, I just want her to have the courage to tell it’s over so I can move on. The best day I had was the day after she told me she was filing, when she wanted to talk the following day and informed me she hadn’t filed because she was confused…I could feel myself falling back into the waves of limbo. I know it will take time, but I will be okay, I won’t be alone forever. I have a cocktail with my dad after dinner, but aside from that I’m avoiding drugs and alcohol. Therapy has help…
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 12:19 AM
4

Thanks man! I’m trying to remain hopeful she gets her head out of her ass, but I don’t suspect she will. Thankfully, I’m a male nurse so I’m usually surrounded by women, so I know I’ll be able to meet someone again. I just feel like my life has been blown up. We were actively trying to have children and looking to buy a home. Now I’m back to where I was when I was 26. She definitely cheated down; dude is much shorter, bald, not in good shape, and doesn’t make as much money as I do.
/r/Divorce_Men17/05/23 11:58 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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