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MissOrion24 Archive

View 6 posts and 61 comments by MissOrion24 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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37

I think this is referring to one of the threads linked in the handbook. The OP of that thread gave the example of “when a man you’re on a date with is about to hand you your coat, turn around and give him to opportunity to do the nice thing and help you put it on” to see if he’s considerate like that or not.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/21 06:52 PM
7

This sounds like me-in-a-couple-years wrote it, hopefully haha It’s actually exhausting to constantly convince yourself that your issues/expectations are valid when there is nothing “wrong” in the status quo. Asking myself “do I meet these expectations myself?” and the “if he wanted to he would” mantra have been super helpful in getting myself to believe my expectations are perfectly legit. The fact that this type of guy often “shows up” and seems capable at the beginning of the relationship mak…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/03/21 08:16 PM
2

I appreciate the perspective and I do think about this stuff and am wary of it slowly becoming a situation I don’t like. But my worries are pretty addressed since we have talked about this a fair amount. Both of the situations so far, I truly feel good about the division of money and labor. We have both ended up with a similar amount of relaxing time; it’s not all him relaxing and me running around doing things. He really wants to be responsible for house fixing, car fixing, and yard work (and i…
/r/RedPillWives07/12/20 04:55 PM
5

I’m younger and not married, so take this with a grain of salt. But this is also a topic I really enjoy discussing. Currently my boyfriend and I (live together) have separate bank accounts and split common expenses 50/50. Our salaries aren’t that different so doing an exact % would feel unnecessarily like splitting hairs. We each do our own thing as far as personal expenses, ie he doesn’t give input on how much my fancy face creams cost and I don’t care about all the computer products he buys. I…
/r/RedPillWives07/12/20 02:00 PM
2

I feel like I see the “man does lawn, house and car fixing; woman does everything else” responsibility split a lot, but unless you guys take amazing care of your lawn or are really into DIY house/car maintenance, it probably evens out to less hours per week than he likes to think. The fact that you can actually list the things he does (eg boys clothes shopping) while the list of what you do is long enough that specific things get made into groups (eg “general cleaning”, “meals”) is a clue. The l…
/r/RedPillWives10/11/20 04:32 PM
2

Sorry if you’ve answered this before, I went over your post history quickly and didn’t see anything. What are your husband’s responsibilities besides work? (Assuming he works less than 70-80 hours a week.) How much time do his responsibilities take in an average week? (And “it’s up in the air whether he’ll do it” doesn’t really count as him doing a chore because you still need to plan a time to do that thing if he ends up not doing it. While he might do it and be helpful, the uncertainty is also…
/r/RedPillWives10/11/20 03:32 PM
2

Awesome, thanks!
/r/RedPillWives29/10/20 01:33 PM
2

Thanks for your response! Quick follow up question: how much of the book was explaining the science vs. her interpretation/advice based on the science?
/r/RedPillWives29/10/20 12:58 PM
1

Thanks for your response! Quick follow up question: how much of the book was explaining the science vs. her interpretation/advice based on the science?
/r/RedPillWives29/10/20 12:58 PM
1

Thanks for your response! Quick follow up question: how much of the book was explaining the science vs. her interpretation/advice based on the science?
/r/RedPillWives29/10/20 12:58 PM
2

Interesting, thanks!
/r/RedPillWives28/10/20 12:41 PM
1

Mine is also a middle child! Hmm 🧐 It’s hard to avoid the complaining since we work out together. I’ve gotten pretty good at just tuning it out and focusing on my workout though. Sometimes if it’s a workout I can do without a mat I’ll let him use mine (for some reason my feet stick on the floor better than his). With more serious problems he doesn’t tend to just complain; he’ll complain once and then solve it usually. This particular issue is just ludicrous/funny to me because he could fix it ve…
/r/RedPillWives22/10/20 04:18 PM
6

Yes! I need to work on not suggesting to my boyfriend how to do his things/checking if his things are complete. Example: he keeps complaining about how his current yoga mat slips all over the place and doesn’t hold its shape. He was finally looking at some new ones on amazon last night, but I don’t think he bought one. Literally as I’m writing this I had to hold back the urge to check up on if he ordered one yet. I’m a very to-do list oriented person, but I need to make sure I focus on my own to…
/r/RedPillWives22/10/20 01:44 PM
2

That seems like a big reach based on the OP.
/r/RedPillWomen16/10/20 03:27 AM
32

Besides acting as a contraceptive, birth control can have good and bad side effects for different women. Sometimes it gives you acne, sometimes acne goes away. Sometimes it makes periods and pms worse, sometimes better. That’s something to talk to your doctor about and potentially try out different ones. The birth control pill stops you from ovulating, so an egg is not released and is therefore not available to be fertilized; it doesn’t cause abortion. Condoms can break or slip off, and then you…
/r/RedPillWomen16/10/20 02:00 AM
1

I’m in an opposite situation; I’m the uber-organized one with tons of sticky notes and to do lists, multiple calendars, etc and my boyfriend is much more laid back. So I’m not sure how helpful this will be, but maybe an interesting perspective. The biggest thing that you both need to be on the same page about is differentiating what you need for yourselves personally, and what you expect of the other person. I expect my boyfriend to get things done on time, and whether he does them with or witho…
/r/RedPillWomen15/10/20 03:47 PM
11

Having long term friendships and doing work to maintain them seems like a very good quality in a person to me. He and his friends from high school live in many different places now, and playing games together helps keep them in touch. He also has plenty of hobbies that advance his value, and we work out together 3-4 times a week and are pretty darn fit, if I do say so myself. An inability to relax and play games on a Sunday evening would be more of a red flag to me; a person who can’t relax will…
/r/RedPillWives12/10/20 05:24 PM
8

Are you expecting him to be a better person than you? What family ‘rules’ is he breaking? Does he even know? Do you even know? This is now going on a sticky note I will reflect on every time I am annoyed or disappointed.
/r/RedPillWives11/10/20 10:31 PM
8

Over time the paranoia will fade. You’ll make bad jokes or accidentally say the wrong thing and observe him not leaving you, and that will build your trust and make you secure over time. At least in my experience, there’s a big fake it til you make it component. You also have to trust that he will tell you if he doesn’t like something. My boyfriend told me very quickly he did not like me calling him “Name-y” and now I don’t have to worry about accidentally offending him, because he is a grown as…
/r/RedPillWomen10/10/20 11:55 PM
2

I have a different (yet similar?) struggle with finances. I’m very on top of my own budget (like big excel with multiple tabs, projections, enter every receipt) and I am in charge of generally keeping track of our combined budget. I used to get on his case about his personal budget, and that’s something I’ve worked really hard to stop. I have enough of a general estimate that I can do the combined budget without nagging him and that’s fine. It saves us both a lot of stress.
/r/RedPillWives09/10/20 03:05 PM
6

I second leggings + cute socks. I’ve been doing lace bralettes or crop top sports bras when it’s not too cold inside, then putting on an unbuttoned denim shirt if I am cold. You could also try some of those button down shirts that are cropped with the tie in front. I have a few pairs of more poofy/flowy pants and I make sure to wear them on days when I don’t need to add the denim shirt. They also sit fairly low on the hips so there’s a good bit of mid-drift showing, but it’s just me and my bf at…
/r/RedPillWives05/10/20 12:56 PM
6

Yes, this is what I would have posted. Tried it with one of my exes and would not recommend. Everything is better in the light of morning.
/r/RedPillWives04/10/20 07:46 PM
1

Wow that’s interesting about fruit flies! Yeah this book is not the most useful, or the useful parts are definitely also found in other books that are much more useful overall. Did make for an amusing read though. There was also an insert advertising sex classes, as in classes to get your preferred sex of offspring.
/r/RedPillWives04/10/20 06:57 PM
1

Maybe “letting my guard down” isn’t the very best term; since I do share a lot about myself and show my true personality very early on. I’m just an open book type of person. So the longer timeline is more about how much I’ll go out of my way for him, the consideration his wants get in comparison to mine, etc. Not to say I didn’t do nice things for him early on; when he came over I made sure there was always good food and some beer for him and things like that. So a very small amount of “going ou…
/r/RedPillWives02/10/20 02:57 AM
9

This is something I have a constant internal struggle with myself, so I would also be very curious to hear more experienced women’s opinions. I don’t think it’s a struggle you can entirely avoid if you are more submissive in relationships but still have high self worth and want to stand up for what you deserve and how you want to be treated. I often find my thoughts oscillating between “just calm down, you’re being needy and high maintenance” and “no that is a totally reasonable thing, you deser…
/r/RedPillWives01/10/20 08:20 PM
5

I agree with this. I think it can be helpful when dating to be cognizant of how much you are talking about yourself vs. asking the other person about themselves. “Droning on about your life” is definitely not preferable, and the more you ask the other person about themselves the more you learn about them which is helpful for vetting. But that balance is part of being a generally good conversationalist. If you’ve already got that part down, I don’t see anything wrong with mostly being in the mome…
/r/RedPillWives29/09/20 03:51 PM
2

Yeah that’s a great skill! (It’s also great for learning about places when you’re traveling to them if you strike up conversations with people in bars and whatnot.) If definitely an art though, and I’m always worried I’ll ask something too personal or prying since I definitely have not mastered that art yet. I’m also a lot more of an open book than the average person, so something that may not feel too personal for me might for someone else.
/r/RedPillWives27/09/20 03:09 AM
1

These are some great ideas, thanks! Our apartment isn’t big but it is close to campus so it may become a common hangout. Luckily it’s only about 550 sqft so easy to keep neat, and I try to go shopping on Thursdays to make sure it’s “fully stocked” for the weekend. So I’ll keep both those things extra in mind. I also agree about having my own plans and not forcing myself to be included in his time with his friends. If they go out together this will be easy enough, and if they’re at our place I ha…
/r/RedPillWives26/09/20 10:07 PM
1

I definitely think people in general don’t talk about those serious issues enough beforehand. I hadn’t heard of that book, but I may get it now, it sounds like a great resource.
/r/RedPillWomen26/09/20 01:45 AM
25

I have mixed thoughts on this. I do agree that therapy should be more accepted as something to do for yourself, like people shouldn’t wait until they’re in a really dire situation to ask for help. But I think the bar for couples therapy should be higher than individual therapy. In a perfect world, two people would work on themselves (maybe through therapy) and come to the relationship as two whole functioning adults, and therefore be able to communicate. If two people are having one specific iss…
/r/RedPillWomen25/09/20 07:20 PM
4

Is the flair just for mods and experienced participants? If not, how do I add it? Thanks!
/r/RedPillWives24/09/20 06:38 PM
46

Thank you guys for taking the feedback into account and coming up with a reasonable way forward! I’m fairly new to this sub, but it’s quickly become one of my favorites, and I hope it continues to be a great space. Some of the most quality and thoughtful discussion I’ve seen on Reddit has been here, and it’s nice to have a place to share thoughts that are important to me that would be unwelcome elsewhere. Even it if has been undermodded, the genuine contributors seem to have a pretty good bs met…
/r/RedPillWomen22/09/20 03:16 AM
1

I second r/xxfitness, it’s a great community, good vibes, focused on activity and healthy eating, and, most importantly, sustainable progress. In addition to the activity/eating posts there’s a good amount of mental/emotional health posts that can be really helpful.
/r/RedPillWomen21/09/20 02:48 PM
6

I think any individual person’s answers to this would be different if you define riches and jewels to be a euphemism for financial security (which it sounds like you are) or to literally mean lots of extra money and jewelry (which it sounds like your boyfriend is).
/r/RedPillWomen20/09/20 03:50 PM
4

I have “at work” lounge clothes that are slightly more put together, and “after work” lounge clothes that are more casual. I do put effort into making sure both are cute, as my man and I are both mostly working from home. Once I knew I would be working from home long term I actually invested in some clothes for this. Even if he’s not necessarily there to see you, feeling cute and comfy rather than like a troll and comfy will help your mindset and mood, and that’ll make a difference when you see …
/r/RedPillWomen14/09/20 06:56 PM
8

This! Just dieting will make you smaller but also flatter/straighter. Working out to gain muscle will give you some curves back. Also, a nice booty made out of muscle will last a lot longer than a nice booty made out of fat. The one thing it can’t entirely solve is your breasts getting smaller from a generally lower body fat %, but working out your chest muscles helps them stay perky longer, so it’s a trade off. There’s an xxfitness subreddit that might be helpful.
/r/RedPillWomen12/09/20 11:29 PM
13

Yes! OkCupid is great if people actually answer all the questions. My boyfriend and I were a 97% match on OkCupid and it was not wrong. Random side story, but we met on tinder, talked for a while but didn’t exchange numbers, and my phone updated and deleted my tinder account somehow. I freaked out, quickly made an OkCupid thinking he might be on there too, and after I answered all the questions low and behold there he was in the first line of suggestions. We actually went through all the questio…
/r/RedPillWomen12/09/20 11:25 PM
2

Yes, but (in my life and as the basis for the theoretical question) we are both providing resources. Unless your answer to the question is that the RPW captain/first mate dynamic is not attainable in a marriage unless the wife is doing all the childcare and the husband is doing all the resource gathering?
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/20 09:11 PM
2

Everything childcare related seems like an awfully large thing to be one task. I’ve seen that article; I should probably do follow up research related to that since I don’t plan on actually being pregnant.
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/20 09:02 PM
2

This has generally been my opinion. But the idea of the wife taking the lead on childcare and at least being a SAHM for a little bit seemed widespread enough/the norm on this sub that I was curious if there was something I was missing from a red pill POV, like some logical inconsistency in my desires (desires regarding childcare vs. desires for the type of husband/marriage I want in general).
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/20 05:33 PM
4

Yes, to clarify I didn’t mean split every individual task 50/50, I agree that seems inefficient, but of tasks in the childcare genre I would like it to end up 50/50 in aggregate. Could you expand more on women being more naturally suited to childcare, especially when the kids are younger? (Besides breastfeeding, which if someone chooses to do it, the women would obviously be more suited to that haha)
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/20 05:15 PM
1

Thanks for the thoughtful answer!
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/20 05:05 PM
1

I would agree this tends to be the case (both from what I’ve read here, and among the general population of marriages I’ve seen “out in the wild”). Even if the delegated tasks related to kids are 50/50 (which isn’t always the case), it seems like moms end up doing most of the thinking about what tasks actually need to be delegated (like realizing that keeping track of clothes is a thing that needs to be done at all) and researching how the task should be carried out once delegated (like the mom …
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/20 03:58 PM
2

How do you think it would change the dynamic of your marriage (if at all) if you were the one who happened to have the more money/better insurance job, and it made more logical sense for him to be the one to step back from work? (Sorry if this comes off as pushy, I’m genuinely curious. I feel like I’ve seen “it ended up that way” a lot on this sub, but much more often than not it seems to end up with the wife taking a step back from work.) And yeah, I’m not tied to feeling the way I do, so if it…
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/20 03:09 PM
–

I don’t know if this counts as a homemaking tip, but it didn’t feel like it needed its own post either. My man and I currently rent an apartment, which throws off the balance of tasks a bit. I can still cook, clean, do laundry, etc. But he can’t really take care of the yard (no yard), fix the cars (no car), or fix the house (not allowed). And he definitely doesn’t have the dream workshop he will eventually have. So he’s been feeling under-utilized. However, to my fellow renters, we may have come…
/r/RedPillWomen10/09/20 01:09 AM
8

No problem! I didn’t mean the last part to be directed at you specifically, if it came off that way. More so that just like your friends would want to live with a guy first, there are plenty of guys that want to live with a girl first. Best wishes to you and your boyfriend! Edit: saw your other comment, and I guess that is a key difference too. Some people see engagement as a test for marriage, and others see it as basically being married and only existing because planning a wedding takes time.
/r/RedPillWomen31/08/20 08:18 PM
26

I feel like you know most of the arguments for your viewpoint. The one you didn’t explicitly list is the whole “men are the gatekeepers of commitment, and he’ll never commit if you start living together and acting like a wife without making him have to commit to get those things” idea. As far as the opposing point of view, many women don’t see it as a “risk” as you see it. Maybe a small risk since there are costs and/or time involved with moving all your stuff from one place to another, but ther…
/r/RedPillWomen31/08/20 08:00 PM
1

I’m glad you guys figured it out! Yeah we both eat healthy and are active.
/r/RedPillWomen31/08/20 12:40 PM
1

Thanks! And yeah, it’s just like fine tuning, so I don’t want to make it a thing :)
/r/RedPillWomen29/08/20 04:11 AM
1

Mine is partial to crop tops and booty shorts. I have some just for wearing at home that I would never wear in public haha Yay thanks for the encouragement!
/r/RedPillWomen28/08/20 10:45 PM
4

Yeah, so far it seems like along with talking more about what sort of sex I’d like to have/try, upgrading from looking cute to looking hot/sexy when hanging out at home would be the best bet for addressing this without making it a thing Thanks!
/r/RedPillWomen28/08/20 08:47 PM
6

Thanks for the advice! I do try to talk about sex, like suggesting things I would be excited to do or try, and try to do that in a lighthearted manner and not right when we are about to have sex. So I could make a concerted effort to do that more. Saying things like “I’ve been thinking about doing xyz to you all day” or “you’re making me so horny” isn’t really either of our styles. It’s true that I’m not the most comfortable with the “let’s sit down and have a talk” approach in general, so I try…
/r/RedPillWomen28/08/20 08:13 PM
–

Have lunch not in front of my computer Actually use the face masks I’ve bought Keep my toe nails nice and painted Don’t use my one free weeknight to get ahead on work Stretch before bed
/r/RedPillWomen28/08/20 01:12 AM
2

I’ve also only lived in pretty liberal places as far as the US goes (DC and now Chicago), so I’m afraid I can’t be of too much help. If you’re up for a terrible commute to DC or Baltimore, some rural parts of Maryland are nice. I’ve also heard good things anecdotally about Denver. I think it’s getting more liberal and prices are going up a bit, but it’s still more conservative than east coast cities. It has a good job market too. Probably more libertarian type of conservative than traditional/re…
/r/RedPillWomen20/08/20 08:39 PM
3

I agree! You don’t have to move to the middle of nowhere or sacrifice having job opportunities, fun activities, cool restaurants, or whatever else. There are plenty of mid-size cities not on the west coast or in the northeast that may have a m culture and price tag more compatible with your goals. Also, moving somewhere new can help you mature and grow into yourself. So even apart from finding a partner, it could be a rewarding experience.
/r/RedPillWomen20/08/20 07:56 PM
2

Yeah I don’t use eyeshadow; it seems to contribute to breakouts and (in my opinion) looks a little out of place without full makeup. I only use eyeliner on my waterline, not on my actual face skin, so maybe that would make a difference 🤷🏼‍♀️ Good luck!
/r/RedPillWomen20/08/20 02:05 PM
9

I have the same problem, so I often just use makeup besides foundation, powder, etc. Some mascara, eyeliner, tinted lip balm, some light definition of your eyebrows, and doing something a little interesting with your hair can go a long way to looking feminine and put together without having to risk the break out. Sometimes if I look particularly tired I’ll put a little makeup under my eyes to hide the dark circles, but that’s not an area that breaks out much. For occasions where I do wear full m…
/r/RedPillWomen20/08/20 01:58 PM
9

Following, I’ve been thinking about this too recently.
/r/RedPillWomen14/08/20 03:09 AM
2

I’ve gone through OP’s comment history in other subs, and she didn’t come across as super uncomfortable or anxious about some of the things that may be at issue in this post, and mentioned seeing it as “serving him”. So I guess I would still say more information is needed on exactly what she is worried about and why. And what she is just worried about vs has actually experienced negative consequences of. So yeah, maybe too much detail for this sub
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/20 04:53 PM
1

What has been answered? More information about OP’s personal situation? I am relatively new to the RP stuff, so I admit I don’t know what the “RP-endorsed answer” would be, I just mean that from how the question is phrased it doesn’t sound like she is fundamentally uncomfortable with it, but she worries based on the RP theory in general that it is “not advised”. And based on the range of sexual behaviors which she could possibly be referring to given her current description, I would imagine the …
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/20 04:06 PM
1

I feel like there is a significant practical difference that isn’t being teased out of OP’s question, which is the difference between “dominating” and physically being on top and doing the work. If he wants to be dominated in the sense that he wants to be ordered around, humiliated/degraded, spanked, etc. that seems possibly incompatible with his role as RP would see it. (But as others have noted, it’s not necessarily a dealbreaker depending on how the two people directly involved see it.) It’s …
/r/RedPillWomen05/05/20 03:49 PM
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