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NimueArt Archive

View 0 posts and 45 comments by NimueArt on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

It would depend on the nature of your comment. Frankly, in the women’s forums I am in there are men who submit rational and helpful comments occasionally. I haven’t seen anyone tell them they are not welcome and often their comments are well received and generate great discussions. Sadly, the majority of male comments in those forums are not benign. I have been married for over 20 years and until now there has never been any divorce in my family, so it isn’t anything we have had to deal with bef…
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/24 08:18 PM
4

Wow… thanks. I am here to learn what men go through during divorce to help support my brother who recently separated from his wife. Pardon me for being a concerned human being. And yes, there are definitely spaces for women to chat and nearly daily we get comments from misogynistic incels telling us that we are all whores and deserve to die. I didn’t expect that my comment that was meant to be supportive and helpful would be met with ire.
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/24 04:45 PM
2

From your post and your comments it sounds like you are battling depression on top of all your other stressors. This is where you should focus your efforts. Exercise will definitely help with it too, but it isn’t a substitute for therapy and/or medication. You owe it to yourself to be healthy and live a fulfilling life. This may or may not include having a romantic partner, but having meaningful friendships should definitely be a part of it. If and when you are ready to work out I would look for…
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/24 03:39 PM
3

Make sure of the laws in your state regarding divorce. If you are in an at fault state I would hold off on dating until a formal separation is established. Other than the legal question the rest is up to you. Don’t rush into a relationship before you are ready, but there is nothing wrong with casually dating.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/24 06:18 PM
3

Do you through yourself on your sword to give romance to the undatable? How very noble of you.
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/23 02:52 AM
2

Dude- you have a better understanding of women than most men I know. As much as we women want to be considered for things other than our ability to breed it is still an instinct that affects all of us. OP has been married for three years of which his wife has spent the majority of it pregnant or in post partum. Talk about an emotional roller coaster! But she still needs to learn how to argue fairly and without verbal abuse.
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/23 05:30 AM
1

A healthy argument should never get mean. No name calling, no insults. Your therapy should be focusing on how to argue in a constructive way, otherwise it is abusive. If she can’t understand that then you should cut your losses and get yourself and the kids away from her.
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/23 05:25 AM
2

In her defense, Dustin Hoffman has a long recorded history of being inappropriate with female colleagues.
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/23 07:49 PM
1

Your response was perfectly reasonable. It seems that you had some issues that you agreed you needed to work on and you did. Her adding arbitrary things to the list is a separate issue- that shows that there will always be something she doesn’t want you to do regardless of how much effort you put in.
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/23 12:21 AM
2

I agree. The post does not have enough info to provide an informed response. Has she asked him to change this aspect about him previously? Have they discussed it? Did anyone make any attempts at change or therapy? Or did this ultimatum come out of the blue? Is it a harmful behaviour? A negligent behaviour? Or simply irritating?
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/23 12:17 AM
1

What does she want you to change?
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/23 12:11 AM
-1

I believe the sentiment is to actually get to a place of indifference. Holding on to hate will get you no where. In hating someone you put just as much energy as in loving them. And you are giving them control over you.
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/23 03:33 AM
3

Thank you for recognizing this! I see so many men bitter about having to pay spousal support because their ex wives sacrificed education or career progression in favor of being the primary caregiver. The spouse that stays home gives up any sense of financial autonomy so the breadwinner can focus of their career. It is a fair trade off.
/r/Divorce_Men03/12/23 05:32 AM
1

What will get you attention is doing something you truly enjoy. There is nothing more attractive than a man who puts his all into something he loves. But I reiterate what others have said. To find happiness through someone else is a formula for failure. You will never be truly happy until you find it within yourself. Take a stab at trying things you would never think of trying: take a cooking class, join a community choir, volunteer for Big Brothers and Sisters. If you can’t think of anything to…
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/23 07:46 AM
2

You are welcome, I hope it helped!
/r/Divorce_Men30/11/23 11:46 PM
1

If you are walking and turn a corner and see a spectacular sunset it may cause you to stop and take a second look. Same with a beautiful painting, or a sculpture. We are wired to notice beauty. It is no different when we pause to take a look at an attractive person. It doesn’t mean we think they are better than our spouse, it doesn’t mean you want to have sex with them, it simply means that you liked their aesthetic the same way you did that sunset.
/r/Divorce_Men30/11/23 01:40 AM
27

This would not make you a ‘walk away wife.’ You tried to work with him in his issues. You communicated with him. I don’t believe this is what OP means. And more power to you for leaving rather than continue to beat your head against a wall.
/r/Divorce_Men29/11/23 03:03 PM
70

In two years she hasn’t gone on a date. She still loves you, but is afraid to trust you. You have a track record of sobriety now. Tell her you miss her and still love her. You haven’t anything to lose.
/r/Divorce_Men27/11/23 09:44 PM
14

I think most people enter into a marriage looking for happiness and fulfillment. But the truth is- you cannot put that burden on another person. One must find that on their own and only then can they be a good life partner. If you marry someone because ‘she makes you happy’ then when you find yourself to not be happy anymore is it really your spouses’ fault? Instead, focus on yourself. Become the person you WANT to be first. Once you have that… THEN if you find a partner at the same place as you…
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/23 05:07 PM
2

I guess by your logic that you deserved to be cheated on too, then.
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/23 03:24 PM
1

Some companies I have worked for offered a legal plan, called the Hyatt legal plan, but there may be others by different names. This plan provides you with access to attorneys for things like family law and estate planning. Simple things like wills and family trusts are offered through this plan at no cost. This would be where I would start looking for advice.
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/23 05:07 AM
0

Does your employer offer a legal plan as part of your benefits package?
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/23 03:06 AM
1

Are you in the US? This is not what at all what we were advised. We have a trust set up with all our assets in it, including 401k, house, all major assets. This way when I pass my kids become joint beneficiaries of the trust and avoid inheritance tax. There is no way this would not be considered a joint asset in a divorce. Otherwise every spouse would be running to set up trusts as soon as ‘separation’ is mentioned.
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/23 02:08 AM
2

As far as I know you can name anyone you want as a beneficiary. What country are you in?
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/23 01:48 AM
2

Advice given has assumed you are in the US. If you aren’t then please be sure to check with a tax preparer in your country.
/r/Divorce_Men25/11/23 09:15 PM
4

Dying without a will means everything goes to your next of kin- which is your spouse. She will be your spouse legally until your divorce is finalized. So if you want to be sure she doesn’t get any of your assets if you die before the divorce is final you should do your will right away.
/r/Divorce_Men25/11/23 09:12 PM
1

Dude- my aunt remarried at 80 (had been a widow since in her early 70’s). I promise you there is hope! But it won’t happen until you have your confidence back.
/r/Divorce_Men25/11/23 12:35 AM
1

How long have you been sober? Your posts only date back a couple of days so it is impossible to tell, but it sounds recent. If it is recent then your family is right to be cautious. My family has addicts and I cannot express to you the hell we went through with them. The sad fact is that it takes a long time for people to trust an addict again. For the money issue I would speak to an attorney asap. I think they are the only ones who can help you. Once you have that figured out I would consider t…
/r/Divorce_Men25/11/23 12:21 AM
-14

Well you are divorced so clearly you should be seeking wisdom from someone.
/r/Divorce_Men24/11/23 11:16 PM
-11

Yup. The only thing worse that the post itself is some of the comments on it. All I can say is that if sex only takes him 5-10 minutes his wife was a saint to put up with him as long as she did.
/r/Divorce_Men24/11/23 11:13 PM
3

Would it be worth it to you to try and rekindle your relationship with your wife? My husband and I have gone through periods like this. We get too focused on our jobs or the kids and forget to put the same effort into each other. We have gotten to the point where when one of us realizes what is happening we bring it to the other’s attention and discuss what is happening.
/r/Divorce_Men24/11/23 10:36 PM
3

Have you tried couples therapy? It sounds like your relationship has died from complacency more than anything.
/r/Divorce_Men24/11/23 10:10 PM
1

You have only been married for a year. There is always an adjustment period and it can be rough. There are several red flags here. The first being that she sounds abusive. It can be difficult to tell from one Reddit post, but her insults are very immature. There are constructive ways to argue that lead to resolution, but this is not it. The second red flag is your mental health. If you are not taking care of yourself then you cannot take care of your marriage. It sounds like she is also having m…
/r/Divorce_Men24/11/23 09:04 PM
0

What exactly gave you that impression? I have never cheated, but I have been cheated on.
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/23 07:09 PM
2

Depending on your time zone this suggestion may be too late. I would suggest you incorporate something new into the day. Start new traditions with your kids on the holidays so that her absence isn’t as prominent. It will also give them something extra to look forward to when you have them for holidays.
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/23 05:34 PM
1

I am a bad person for reading OP’s full story and responding accordingly? If you read through you will see a very clear picture of how all of his problems are caused by his ex and his older daughters. He takes no responsibility for his own part. Hell, he doesn’t even see that he HAS a part in his own misery. He is a victim. If he feels shamed by my comments it is because they are true. He punishes the ONE person who still has a relationship with him (a child nonetheless!) because of circumstance…
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/23 05:05 PM
0

What unjust family law is at play here? Their family dynamic was that he worked, she was a SAHM. This means that the kids will bond with her more simply because she is around more. Also- two of his three kids are adults and have been since the start of divorce process. His lack of relationship with them is his own doing. He kicked them out of his life, not the other way around.
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/23 04:57 PM
2

I would do whatever my daughter asks is me because it is HER day and not mine. My job as a parent is to support her, not put my own petty feelings above hers on the most important day of her life. Whether we like it or not a step parent has great influence in our children’s lives. If we are lucky the step parent is a positive and loving influence, rather than bringing conflict and strife into our kids life. If a step parent has stepped up and worked to have a loving and supportive relationship w…
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/23 04:53 PM
5

Keep watching Andrew Tate. I am sure he has much more to teach you.
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/23 03:18 AM
7

Are you really sure about that? Out of you three kids none of them want to be with you. You skipped your 9 year olds birthday because you didn’t want to deal with your other kids. You are petty and selfish with massive anger issues. If I were a kid I wouldn’t want to be around you, either.
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/23 02:58 AM
2

Then as a parent you are an utter failure.
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/23 02:43 AM
3

It isn’t for you to accept or not accept. You would rather miss the most important day of your daughters life than have to walk with her other father figure with her down the isle? This is so narcissistic and if you were my father I would rather not have you there than deal with your faux drama. It also shows very poor parenting skills - you are way too self-centered. This day is NOT about you. Stop looking for ways to be offended, pull your head out of your ass and support your child!
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/23 02:26 AM
10

Thank you for sharing this. Split families that come together to make sure all kids needs are met should be celebrated. It takes a strong man to admit that another man made positive contributions to your kid’s lives.
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/23 02:19 AM
1

I think you are discounting the contributions step parents make in kids lives. Not every family has a caustic relationship.
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/23 02:16 AM
2

You are so confusing. You were ‘deceived’ into moving so now you don’t have any friends- you have been there for quite some time- the lack of friends is your own fault. Own it. You agreed to move and now your career has taken off and you are doing well… so stop complaining about the move. You spend hours obsessing over her life in all of your posts, and then rant about how she would never have sex with you. Saying that you slave all day at work for her and she can’t give you 5-10 minutes for sex…
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/23 12:23 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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