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Ninja_Flower_Lady Archive

View 4 posts and 72 comments by Ninja_Flower_Lady on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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8

On top of the safety issue with giving out real number, they can retaliate by signing your number up for weird shit
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/12/21 08:46 AM
114

On top of just being immoral and gross, there are so many legal issues here. And to target a single mom with a toddler son, struggling financially... how low do you have to be??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/21 02:47 AM
89

even 7-year-old boys can click on Pornhub and watch BDSM orgy porn videos from their iPhone at recess. this really paints a vivid picture, and unfortunately a very probable scenario.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/21 02:13 AM
7

I saw a great idea here before: write a list of things you hate about him (or bad things he did to you) + how it made you feel (humiliated? disrespected? unheard? insignificant? taken for granted?). Keep that list accessible at all times so you constantly remind yourself of the negative reasons you left! Hugs!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/21 06:27 PM
3

Wow, this is stunningly wonderful!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/21 06:20 PM
5

Omg
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/12/21 05:42 AM
36

If you take out the wedding drama, just the part where she flaked on your plans many times already tells you she didn’t care about you
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/21 10:27 AM
5

Imagine pushing a human out your body who treats you like this at the end of your life
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/21 05:07 AM
8

This makes me think fetishes are caused by whatever a man's exposed to in his first foray into sex. Like, if the first encounter they have is with X, then X is potentially what they fetishize down the line.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/12/21 11:50 PM
3

with stars in his eyes What. The. Fuck. I am simultaneously flabbergasted and wanting to laugh at the image you painted.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/12/21 11:48 PM
4

HAHAHAH awesome!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/12/21 11:45 PM
64

Emotional addiction is totally a thing. I think you started getting that bug when you had to force yourself to not reach out. Also, I think the intriguing thing is like a way of flattering and meant to stroke the ego, then he abruptly pulls the rug from under you, and now you're craving that attention/ego stroke, if that makes sense? This is so dangerous, and I think your story shows why it's important to come from a place of total self-sufficiency and self-love. Otherwise, it's too easy to fall…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/12/21 11:44 PM
30

Great reminder. Yeah, it's such a kneejerk reflex to feel grateful for things that we should expect as default/baseline
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/21 11:46 PM
44

This reminds me of an old friend who I've lost contact with over the years. She was accomplished (went to Harvard for college, come on!), well-groomed, successful, and had high standards, but strangely would have oddly low standard/boundary with men. For example, she wouldn't go hiking with her girlfriends, but would gladly do so for a guy she's going out with. Or when she pulled a background check on a new guy she was seeing, to find out he had lied about how much older he was, but was still wi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/21 10:08 PM
31

THIS! It's a free, cheap shot for a chance to have a freebie fwb situation set up. Like buying a $1 lottery ticket to a $10 million prize, b/c why not? Some will flirt with married women b/c, again, free/cheap fuckbuddy, but without complicated strings b/c they're betting the married lady won't actually leave her family.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/21 02:32 AM
18

OP did the right thing b/c this was clearly blatant negging. But on a related note, how ARE we supposed to distinguish toxic negging from genuine attempt to give constructive feedback?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/21 06:05 PM
26

Haha I think the whole world would be simpler if we stop labeling activities as male or female. Women can love stem and men can enjoy knitting. But I digress. Your description of yourself reminds me of cady from mean girls which is pretty cool. She was a math genius.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/21 11:55 AM
29

Your comment about her personality revolving around liking dogs made me chuckle. I like dogs too (have two), but I feel like dogs have become a way of virtue signaling. It’s like having a dog = good person automatically.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/21 11:44 AM
33

Wtf, that was so weird. I really admire your friend for how she handled that situation, to take charge of a situation that honestly did not involve her, AND to pour a drink that technically belonged to someone else. Even though I would step in, I would not have thought to touch what I consider to be someone else’s property due to manners, but I think she did the right thing bc i don’t know if there was any other Way to deal with it aside from taking the option away. Also I think the condescendin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/21 11:39 AM
52

Wait, fuck, she’s not even wearing gloves while cleaning the toilet??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/21 11:17 AM
3

Just some rumors of him cheating with Rose Hanbury. I'm interested too, but as a common folk, I'll never know whether or not it's true. On one hand, I think the press can make up some ridiculous, untrue crap to sell their stories. On the other hand, sometimes they are able to sniff out things that DO have elements of truth (like the Kate-Meghan feud, but of course now we know the truth was it was a William-Harry feud. They also got it wrong which woman made the other cry). You can Google some re…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/21 12:28 AM
26

It's sad a man like this gets to act like a king with his own little harem
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/21 08:42 AM
21

I'm not sure about the economic aspect of it, but I like a lot of the points you made about small town communities checking bad behavior. I feel like the con of smaller communities is change and forward thinking can be slow. But the upside is definitely stronger social ties, higher social trust, and transparency b/c everyone knows everyone. People are genuinely nicer in small towns imo, and there's a greater depth and satisfaction in social relationships of all kinds. That's my $0.02 from having…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/21 08:00 PM
103

Yes, really well said! Maybe the "angry crazy person" is acting that way because you did something bad to them. Maybe they're NOT crazy, and they're rightfully angry at some stupid shady thing you pulled. Growing up, I thought my mom was a raging bitch because she was constantly yelling. As an adult, I see that she's yelling because my dad let her do 50% of a small business they had together plus 100% of the household chores. She was right to yell.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/21 06:05 AM
17

Sort of on a related note re: woman waiting for a ring. What do you guys think of Kate Middleton waiting for about a decade to marry PW? Would you say her situation is more forgivable due to his unusual position, or how he "wanted to make sure" b/c of what happened to Diana?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/21 05:45 AM
18

I get the vibe that poly is considered a "hip" thing, like we're supposed to be sOoOo evolved that we can reinvent, or redefine, conventional love and commitment. It reminds me of people who said, "men are not designed to be monogamous." Nah. It's called disciplining your sexual urges. If you let your sexual fantasies run rampant via uncontrolled porn use, OF COURSE it would be much harder to be satisfied with one person day after day. No surprise there. I feel like poly cuts down the (sometimes…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/21 09:44 AM
5

Some guys will think you didn’t respond only bc you didn’t get his message. Which means you TOTALLY would reply if you had just seen it. They go crazy when they see you’ve read it AND didn’t bother to deign a reply
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/21 10:02 PM
0

Tbh he might not be a predator, he might genuinely think it’s HiLaRiOuS. men can be seriously stupid and juvenile, remember that show Jackass? I think the young immature ones watch something like that, and think that pranking each other outrageously and dangerously is the funniest shit ever. Idiots. They need to be taught where the line is. Also, I’ve done the anger laughing too. Is natural when a situation is unexpected. I’m still working on this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/21 08:43 PM
73

Block and delete is the right answer, but leaving him on "read" (assuming he can see that) is great too lol. Being left on read really mess with some people. I feel like his wishy washiness deserves it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/21 08:32 AM
33

It's sad, but I think men like this won't accept criticism from women, only from other men they respect. And who knows, maybe not even then.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/21 04:16 AM
14

This is so important to distinguish. Sometimes it's worth correcting people/fixing them, but ONLY when they're self-motivated to begin with, or when they genuinely care about others. Their core heart/value has to be right. Otherwise, you're fixing actions but doesn't address his intention and whether he actually even cares about his partner to begin with. OP from the story "won" by making him face his actions' consequences, so he stopped being incompetent FOR HIMSELF. But how about fixing his ac…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/21 01:43 AM
56

I hope you come back in Jan with an update of how everything went (for her bday, etc).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/21 06:44 PM
29

Heh, you said it for me. I actually typed out "trashy" in my earlier comment but then deleted it because I didn't want to come across as poor-shaming. But it's one thing if people are poor but making a genuine effort to better themselves, vs this thing here where it shows lack of money AND (more importantly) legitimate effort.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/21 09:36 PM
25

Ouchhhh!!! It hurts more b/c it's true :(
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/21 09:35 PM
28

Gotcha. I didn't realize it was a personal friend/acquaintance. I thought it was one of those IG posts that went viral and had thousands of likes. I was just curious if people commented positively, or if anyone pointed out that this wasn't ok.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/21 09:34 PM
47

FANTASTIC insight and I think it also works with every kind of relationship. Just because I have a worldview of "how things should be" does NOT mean others share that view or will abide by the same principle. Thinking this way is really immature and dangerous.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/21 08:08 PM
62

Oof. I looked closer at the pic and saw all the donut marks on the ground. And that ring CANNOT get any plainer!!! It's like several levels of disappointment: 1. no diamond, 2. no rock of ANY kind, 3. even without a rock, it doesn't have special markings or designs. It's literally just a tiny circle and that's it. This makes me want to cry a little. Can you link the account? I'm curious what the comments said and if anyone pointed out the ring is underwhelming, or if they're all congratulatory.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/21 08:03 PM
1

Interesting comment, I feel like I can relate. I'm generally ok with playing therapist/providing emotional support IF AND ONLY IF I know that if I needed one in return, the friend would reciprocate. Do you feel like your "friends" were not there for you on the same level in return? The interesting thing about this dynamic is, I had a friend (drifted apart naturally) who would talk endlessly and made me provide emotional labor without doing it in return... but I think she realized at least subcon…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/21 03:54 AM
1

I am curious, may I ask your background? I myself am from San Francisco, which is probably one of the most transient places in the US lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/21 03:06 AM
14

like the Procrustian bed, when it turns out I don't really fit the trope, they would try to cut off the parts of me that didn't fit. ​ hell hath no fury like douche with no imagination whose stereotypes are disappointed What fantastic lines! Are you a writer?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/21 12:24 AM
12

love it. Please do share more stories like this if you're willing, it helps me figure out what actions to take. I used to just politely laugh when I don't know what to do. Now I'm learning I can face disrespectful interactions straight on without avoiding it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/21 12:22 AM
14

Unless you’re my best friend and we’re blazing as we stargaze in a field, don’t ask me shit like this. Please. Lol!! I never thought of this before. I have mixed feelings about the performative question you mentioned. One one hand, I could see it as being a "fun/creative" opener, where the men might be trying to make themselves stand out by asking a fun question instead of just talking about themselves. But this would feel like an interview to me, where I have to show how creative I am in coming…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 12:12 AM
3

This is so upsetting. She invested money, labor, energy, time, resources in him. She wants a one-time purchase of a nice ring (which she would wear for the REST OF HER LIFE) and he can't give that to her? Worse - he's looking at rings in the 1500-2000 range? I really really really hope she dumps him. This is just too unfair for her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/21 10:46 PM
5

If possible, document! Having evidence of wrong doing can come in useful, esp email trails.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/21 10:42 PM
14

Man, this needs to be a post on its own, or get stickied somehow. People have to DESIRE change themselves. Leading a horse to water and all that. If a person is not motivated, it's just not worth convincing them to change. I was a summer school teacher for a period and taught like 30 kids. The difference in working with self-motivated students vs ones who just did not care was like night and day. I mean, they're kids so I'm more understanding, but it really made me think about adult relationship…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/21 09:35 PM
5

I'm curious, did he ever follow up and ask where you went?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/21 09:33 PM
93

Haha this is all great! The blood in the water test reminds me of a story I heard from a college friend. At the beginning of the year, during those coed frat parties, her sorority sisters would designate a sister to act drunk, so they can all observe which guys take advantage of that situation and act shady. I like the 3rd test the best, personally, as you really see how someone is when things don't go their way. Thus, relationships that survive conflicts either grow stronger or break.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/10/21 11:40 PM
170

For sure, they need to reach one level higher. It's like a thief saying, "I should not steal because it's impeding my ability to earn an honest living and be hardworking." Sure, that too, but how about "I should not steal because it hurts the other person and it's just plain wrong of me to enjoy something at the unfair cost of another human being?"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/10/21 11:36 PM
75

f he treated me with decency respect before, then felt a romantic attraction after “glowing up,” that wouldn’t really strike me as a red flag. I like your take on it, that makes a lot of sense. It's fair that people are not attracted to whatever they're not attracted to physically... but at least have the integrity to treat everyone with respect.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 10:19 PM
39

Society needs to ban together and immediately, ruthlessly shame men who tell weird, inappropriate jokes like this. Best case scenario: he was trying to be funny by telling a juvenile joke. Well then, society needs to tell him that's not funny. I do know some people who say weird things b/c they think it's "edgy" or b/c they saw someone else make those sort of jokes. I myself am guilty of the same, in terms of learning social skills from bad TV. Well then, the answer is constructive criticism in …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 10:13 PM
27

I was wondering about that! I was like, benefit of the doubt, he likes Mexican food?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 10:08 PM
68

I'm trying to figure why men who do this, do this. He's acting like those men who expose themselves so someone can just LOOK at their penis. It's weird and pathetic. It's like, "Recognize me! Look at me! See me! Look at my pp!" I wonder if he's trying to flex sexual power over you, to move the dynamic to sex, or if he really was trying to be funny like a 6th grader by making a juvenile joke. Either way, society needs to shame adult men who make inappropriate jokes like this when they JUST met so…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 10:06 PM
22

WTF!? Freak.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 09:44 PM
2

Also, I'm so glad that little lovebird was found by you guys :) I always hope that if a bird nearby needed help, that I would come across it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 11:26 AM
3

Omg, so glad to meet another bird lover who understands them!!!! Yes I ADORE birds, esp pigeons and parrots. I have cockatiels myself :) Yes, birds are seriously misunderstood, and it makes me so sad/mad! Most people just think they're two-dimensional things. WRONG! They have personality and emotions! The only reason we don't see that side is b/c we haven't earned their trust. To people who complain that birds just run away, I ask, "How would you feel if a skyscraper-sized giant comes at you?" L…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 11:24 AM
18

Yes, sadists is exactly what they are. It feels good to have a straightforward description, so thank you for using that word. I think I used to feel like boys are just more curious about science and nature, or whatever BS, but nope! It's "falsely justified sadism." And what I mean is, they use the excuse "this is nature" to justify this source of entertainment, when the truth is a lot of them are just fascinated by watching a living thing struggle.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 09:34 AM
4

Yes, I think respectful is a perfect way to describe it. The YT videos I'm thinking of treat it like a circus. I might have to change this post to "male depravity" instead, b/c truly, all those videos have been done by men. I'm actually extremely surprised that I never realized the fact that I have not seen a single woman do this! How have I not seen this before!?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 09:32 AM
2

yup, everything you said! It's disturbing to see an apex predator eat something helpless with no means to protect itself. I think that's the aspect that disturbs me. And yup, it's always the men who goes "awesome!" Seriously disturbing and gross.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 09:25 AM
33

See, at least your reaction is human to me. Your father though... laughing at a living thing feeling pain and terror? That's just awful. I'm sorry you saw that side of your dad.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 02:06 AM
28

I have no problem with nature existing but it's people who get sick pleasure out of watching violence that are a major red flag. Yes, this sentence articulates it perfectly!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 01:33 AM
19

Agreed. To me, having a predator pet already shows we're incompatible on a fundamental level :/ Cats are a gray area though. They're great pets, but I can't deny they're adorable little serial killers. Maybe it makes me a hypocrite. But my point still stands that I don't enjoy live feedings, and there's something "off" about people who do. Nature may be ugly, but we don't have to find entertainment value in its cruel side.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 01:27 AM
34

Glad to hear you feel this way too. Yes exactly, there are dead feeds like frozen mice. I can sort of understand if they live feed b/c they believe it's healthier (and even then, I still don't like that they own these pets to begin with). But it feels like a lot of times, the live feed is more for entertainment purposes than health reasons. Super disturbing. I remember one comment where some guy enthusiastically said, "Yeah!!! The snake squeeze the mouse so hard its bone popped out of its ass!" …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 01:24 AM
21

omg yes, it's soooo irresponsible (or darkly intentional?) to write characters like him, and do so in a way that invites the audience to LIKE HIM WHILE ACKNOWLEDGING HIS ACTIONS ARE BAD!!! So many men out there love him and want to be like him. His cool apartment, job, suits, etc have seduced a generation of men. When we take a giant step back and really examine Barney, we see that he's a predatory sociopath clothed in a "cool" persona.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/10/21 09:10 PM
64

Yup, that laugh track. Imagine if instead of laughing, the audience makes noises of disapproval/disgust, and those sounds are played instead of laughter when someone does a terrible thing
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/10/21 03:04 AM
6

Wow, the first date hasn't officially started and they already had that expectation? That's so entitled. How did you respond? For me the date would be DOA right then and there lol. I might still go through with it, but would already check him off in my head.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/10/21 02:24 AM
41

Joey's character from Friends REALLY piss me off. I might make a separate post about him. He's a serial womanizer who flat out lies to and manipulates women for sex, only to discard them immediately. He was an idiot who couldn't support himself without Chandler's help, and who fails a lot of basic adulting skills. But we see him from the Friends' perspective, so we see him as a good person b/c he treated his friends well. If we view him from those other women's eyes, he immediately (and obviousl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/10/21 02:14 AM
29

I'm glad you bring up TN. I was thinking to myself during a rewatch years ago: Noah said he'll be whatever Allie wanted to make her happy, and he sure as heck went through a ton of effort to woo her in the beginning. I believe he was serious about her and genuinely cared for her. BUT HELLO!? He knew that her parents didn't like his blue collar background b/c he wouldn't be able to give Allie the lifestyle her parents wanted for her. He could at least try to better himself professionally. He didn…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/10/21 02:02 AM
42

Thanks for articulating this whole paragraph. It applies to so many situations, even ones outside of romantic relationships. We’re allowed to take time with important decisions.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/10/21 01:16 AM
9

I took a stroll through the Nofap subreddit once. I remember one post from there. This guy talked about how he would masterbate to porn only “once in a while, not at all a significant number.” But one day he decided to try out the challenge to stop 100%. He was shocked to realize how much his sexual attraction to his wife skyrocketed when he resisted masterbating to porn images and fantasies. It turns out that even without him realizing it, he was dissipating that energy that could’ve gone towar…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/10/21 12:10 AM
111

First, one of the comments said auto industry is dominated by men so it would make sense to ask a dude first. We generally assume men would know more about cars. So yes, there’s a chance it was shady. Second, even if he didn’t have any evil intent, the fact that he asked you instead of other men shows a disrespect. It’s like he feels less bad or intimidated to inconvenience you. It reminds me of this book I had to read for class about AIDS in the 80s. This Indian doctor said this elderly white c…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 09:03 AM
27

This is why fds is great, lots of groundbreaking ways of thinking that reexamines old accepted norms, and often flipping them upside down to reveal the greater truth. This is one of the biggest takeaway: either a hvm or single. No third option.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 08:09 AM
3

Oh man, I worked with this lady who dated a prisoner. They met bc he messaged her on FB. I had checked out his profile and he had 4k+ friends. I assume he messaged people both for platonic interaction and just generally fishing women and seeing who would bite. Long story short, she drove hours (3-4 I think) to meet him, then fell in love with him. She believed he was a good guy imprisoned on trumped up charges. And maybe he was bc he was a minority, I don't know the exact details of his crime, b…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/12/20 12:04 PM
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