~ archived since 2018 ~
~ archived since 2018 ~
| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Does working for a low value boss affect one’s ability to stay feminine at work? If so, how do I vet for this? | OFF TOPIC | No_Objective_1239 | /r/RedPillWomen | 16/03/23 06:31 AM |
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Advice on dating as a bisexual womanIf you are serious about your femininity (or masculinity) journey, you will at some point come face-to-face with your bisexuality. | /r/RedPillWomen | 31/03/23 10:10 PM |
| 11 | Am I a low value women? Would any man want to marry me?This is why I don’t like the terms low and high value. Your value as a person is the same no matter what you do. You cannot lower your value. No human can. The term low value refers to your subjective value as a partner based on someone who doesn’t know you. Like if you were listed in a shopping catalog for potential wives. Which obviously doesn’t exist and shouldn’t exist. Humans don’t work that way. If you focus on your child and work on yourself, you will become the best value to the person w… | /r/RedPillWomen | 23/03/23 06:11 AM |
| 1 | Partner says we cannot be together in the futureHe did have a tough time. Possibly unimaginable. But you can only control what you can control. You don’t have to date anyone else if you don’t want to. But the best case scenario - where he realizes he wants you more and detaches from his family - still requires you to change. Feeling sorry for a man and making excuses for him will not inspire him to man up. It’s too motherly. | /r/RedPillWomen | 22/03/23 06:05 AM |
| 2 | Partner says we cannot be together in the futureYes, he still sadly believes he can make his parents happy by doing what they want. He has to prove to himself that that isn’t possible. It’s very hard to see someone you love being controlled and not free. But he has to deal with his fear of what will happen if he stops being controlled. His fears of his family breaking apart, fears of being blamed, and fears of being disowned. We can’t fight mens’ battles for them, but we can respect their free will to try things on their own (sometimes safely… | /r/RedPillWomen | 21/03/23 09:55 PM |
| 5 | Partner says we cannot be together in the futureI have sooo much empathy for your situation. I know you are hurting. But I am concerned for your safety because it is naive and dangerous to dismiss things as cultural differences. I am concerned for your future safety. I have been around various cultures for decades. To many, many people their family is like a gang. A literal gang. When you marry into a family like that, you aren’t just the dreaded daughter in law. You become the enemy that they will work to get rid of no matter what, and sadly… | /r/RedPillWomen | 21/03/23 09:28 PM |
| 6 | Partner says we cannot be together in the futureThat’s not love. That’s manipulation, control, codependence, and instilling a permanent sense of obligation into him so he will do whatever they want. | /r/RedPillWomen | 21/03/23 08:45 PM |
| 6 | Thoughts on your man going out all night with friendsI know I spend a lot of my energy here warning other women, but don’t do what I did and 1) try to force him to do something to make you feel better 2) decide being connected and vulnerable with someone is too painful and close yourself off emotionally. They’re just ways for you to avoid these unpleasant emotions. If you’re still upset you haven’t fully let yourself feel the unpleasant feelings his actions brought to the surface. You mention you’d never do that to you, so this might be bringing u… | /r/RedPillWomen | 21/03/23 02:12 AM |
| 1 | Christian, exhausted trad wifeI have been thinking about your situation, and it is causing me to reflect on my own life. I’m going to use my reflection to hopefully offer suggestions and to see what I myself should have done. Multi-tasking :) This may not apply to you, but the first thing I did was stop having children. Yes, children are blessings and children are not the cause of stress, but God intended women to be able to choose when to have a child. Women have free will. I was able to recognize that my husband intended t… | /r/RedPillWomen | 14/03/23 02:26 AM |
| 5 | What can the girl, for whom RedPillWomen's advice is not working, do?You said you’re starting to get depressed because men aren’t noticing you. In my opinion, your self esteem is tied to men noticing you. That’s called needing validation and men easily pick up on that. Picture the reciprocal - a man saying he’s got a house, a career, and a truck but he’s despressed that no woman is firting with him and he can’t get a date. A man fully in his masculine would not care about that. He might say he’s been feeling lonely lately, or has been thinking about how much more… | /r/RedPillWomen | 11/03/23 09:15 PM |
| 5 | What was your redpill conversion moment and how did things change for you after you accepted it?It was gradual for me. I was an angry feminist who was triggered all the time. Then I began a journey of self-reflection, self-awareness, and healing my traumas (fear of men, anger towards men). Eventually I could feel the difference between feminine and masculine energy, and tried to practice staying feminine until I’d get triggered, then I’d heal that trigger and go back to being feminine. I lost most of my desire to do things that required masculine energy, and began wanting to clean, cook, n… | /r/RedPillWomen | 10/03/23 09:15 AM |
| 30 | How to move forward in this situationI was once engaged and living with a slightly older guy from an Asian country. He bought me a ring and wrote me love letters. He was a provider and paid for everything. Spent most of his free time with me. He took me on wonderful dates. We even did routine things together like painting bookcases and grocery shopping together. He “couldn’t wait to spend the next 60 years with me.” I was his “one true love.” He hid me from his parents and siblings because of “his culture.” When he was done using m… | /r/RedPillWomen | 07/03/23 09:24 PM |
| 2 | Just need reassurance about a small thingNot weird at all. Unless you have a photographic memory or are really into fashion, I don’t see any other way to do it. | /r/RedPillWomen | 06/03/23 06:36 AM |
| 1 | How can I look/ feel more feminine with shorter hair?How long is your hair now? I cut my hair short once and STILL didn’t catch onto the fact it was curly. I was just like “weird my hair got curly there for awhile” 😆. I’m struggling with having the patience to air dry it fully. | /r/RedPillWomen | 04/03/23 07:25 AM |
| 3 | How can I look/ feel more feminine with shorter hair?Have you looked into the curly girl method? If you have lots of frizz you might have naturally curly hair that you were unaware of. Which requires a lot of modification in how you treat, dry, and handle it. | /r/RedPillWomen | 03/03/23 08:57 PM |
| 4 | Can we talk about accountability in relationships?Ideally, this would be vetted for in the early stages. The woman would take genuine accountability, showing self-reflection and emotional vulnerability. (Not the fake-accountability of “yeah I shouldn’t have done such and such” that people of both sexes sometimes do). Then if the man does not take accountability, or he begins to blame the woman or get angry, then she begins to pull away emotionally. Not taking accountability or being vulnerable results in the natural consequence of not getting t… | /r/RedPillWomen | 02/03/23 07:02 AM |
| 2 | How can I improve my self-confidence?I second the starting small comment. Starting small works! I’d also add self-reflecting after each small feat. Try to be aware of your thoughts. Were you using a piece of equipment and decide to get off it suddenly? Why? Did someone look at you, or did you have a thought that possibly shamed or discouraged yourself? Eventually you’ll discover patterns. “I noticed I try to hide a certain body part. What happened in my past that made me insecure about this body part?” Then go back and feel the fee… | /r/RedPillWomen | 01/03/23 09:34 PM |
| 5 | Tell me this is stupidSo far the results are scary and amazing. Men have started to blush around me, which I haven’t figured out what that is yet. But they are eager to help me. They try to impress me. One man risked physical danger to assist me. I didn’t even ask him to he just walked up and did it. I’m learning men don’t expect me to work as physically hard as they do. I can relax more. Men don’t expect me to be a man. They are HAPPY now to work hard and let me rest. I still don’t understand it, but it’s working. | /r/RedPillWomen | 01/03/23 04:15 AM |
| 5 | Tell me this is stupidYes, essentially. I stopped looking. I started looking at and working on myself from the inside. I believe when I’m done the right guy will find me. Part of that work is reflecting on my past relationships. And practicing liking and respecting masculinity. Practicing not trying to outsmart men. Not angrily invading their personal space. Not sexually projecting to get self worth. Not assessing them based on shallow criteria I’ve set up in my mind. But I am trying to do it from a place of love and… | /r/RedPillWomen | 01/03/23 04:08 AM |
| 3 | Tell me this is stupidWhy? Don’t be sorry! Lots of us started out like that ☺️. I needed so much male validation I did some things I don’t even want to write because it would make me personally identifiable. I wanted the prince, the house, the yard, everything and tried and tried to find a guy to fit my dream. It took a lot of years before I learned that it’s the relationship that makes the home. I can’t just catch a man and make him part of my dream. (Believe me, I tried!) | /r/RedPillWomen | 01/03/23 03:53 AM |
| 16 | Tell me this is stupidIt wouldn’t work. You cannot lock down a man. Even if you hypothetically (not saying you would) got married and pregnant, you cannot make him love you. Stability and security aren’t everything. And he’ll eventually begin to resent that he’s being used for that. Also, most men are not the shallow doofs our culture makes them out to be. They aren’t easily seduced or swayed by appearances. It can also be helpful to value mens’ judgement. Often times when they eliminate us as potential serious relat… | /r/RedPillWomen | 01/03/23 01:06 AM |
| 14 | Struggling with feeling feminineLearning is not masculine or feminine. Going to school to learn and then ending up with a degree is different than going to school to get a degree to build a career. Also, relying on men to financially support you is different than allowing your husband to provide for you. Investing in yourself is an important thing for men and women to do. And you can use your education in everyday life. To give just one example, having a science degree saves so much money on buying stuff. You can easily fight … | /r/RedPillWomen | 24/02/23 03:55 PM |
| 2 | How do you keep yourself well-groomed on a budget?I started doing my own beauty stuff out of necessity and the frustration of having to buy or rotate so many products. I’ve found I’m actually happier with things now. For my hair, I cut it myself. I don’t need frequent trims anymore because I use a skin & hair spray with aloe vera juice morning and night, and use hair oil on my ends and length morning and night. I have 3 main oils I use. One for my hair, one for skin, and one for lips and undereyes. They last from months to years. I use witch ha… | /r/RedPillWomen | 21/02/23 10:07 PM |
| 9 | I've changed a lot, but it never seems like it's enough for himIn my opinion, of the underlying issues is how you yourself determine the root cause of problems. You feel happy 99% of the time, so you look at the 1% and say “the problem is here, in this 1%”. But because you aren’t looking at the root cause, that 1% is going to jump around. You’re going to be playing whack-a-mole. I’ve been there. | /r/RedPillWomen | 18/02/23 09:23 PM |
| 12 | It appears that more women are hardcore feminist than Red Pill because of the fear of backlashit’s also men thinking it’s the way things are It’s so scary in the divorce subreddit where men are laughing that their ex wife “finally had to work”, or are lamenting that their ex is suddenly making the money she “should have made” in the marriage. The woman has to be the primary parent, do the shopping and cooking, most of the chores, the emotional labor, sometimes the budgeting, maybe the organizing/decorating, the pet care, and the husband STILL wants her working outside the home. These men… | /r/RedPillWomen | 18/02/23 07:59 AM |
| 1 | Do I take this as no-interest?I’m happy to hear most businessmen are masculine. I was around a group of them and they were more feminine. Like focusing on business relationships and not caring too much about business growth, spending their breaks focusing on health or shopping, gossiping, talking about the interior design of their business way too much, etc. | /r/RedPillWomen | 16/02/23 09:26 PM |
| 1 | Do I take this as no-interest?He asked you to take the initiative a couple of times. That comes across as feminine to me. He may be more interested in masculine women. For the early phase, you kind of just keep tabs on your energy and keep healing childhood traumas (the ones that made us more masculine). Practice self-awareness and reflection. Your goal is to get back to the level of femininity you had when you were a little girl. So like if you wore dresses, played with dolls, danced, sang, had female friends, played dress-… | /r/RedPillWomen | 16/02/23 08:28 AM |
| 14 | Boyfriend Thinks I’m High Maintenance for Wanting Valentine’s Day PlansYou seem more receptive now, so nevermind about my initial reluctance to answer. You are doing great work in changing yourself and recognizing you were an angry feminist before. But it doesn’t sound like you’ve felt the grief at the root of that anger, and that’s your dad. So you’re trying to get this guy to love you because you have low self esteem from your dad being emotionally distant/rejecting you. After you heal that part of you, you will be repelled by men acting angry/annoyed towards you… | /r/RedPillWomen | 14/02/23 03:05 AM |
| 55 | Boyfriend Thinks I’m High Maintenance for Wanting Valentine’s Day PlansIs this the guy you posted about who did not want to commit to you until you lost some weight? You were given good advice here, but were not receptive to it. | /r/RedPillWomen | 14/02/23 12:44 AM |
| 7 | The Frustrating Trickle Down of Trying to “Have It All”I see it everywhere now, too. I wouldn’t say it harms me, but it helps me learn to go with the flow and highlights triggers that I still need to work on. For example I stopped trying to help the supervisor. If he can’t see a very easily preventable problem coming his way because he’s busy dissociating, then so be it. After I fixed that trigger, work became more entertaining (as opposed to frustrating). Like a circus! I also stopped picking up slack. Sometimes I have to pick up slack, but if it’s… | /r/RedPillWomen | 13/02/23 06:50 AM |
| 1 | Experiences with relationships that started online?That’s an interesting example, thank you for sharing. Two whole years and she was able to hide substance abuse? Yeah, I didn’t believe in the spiritual stuff either until a few years ago. I stubbornly fought against it for a long time before I surrendered. I was an angry feminist who wanted a career, but the universe did everything in its power to get me to stay home with my teen. When I finally gave up and stayed home, my kid began improving by leaps and bounds. I began questioning everything. | /r/RedPillWomen | 09/02/23 10:19 PM |
| 7 | Experiences with relationships that started online?I personally wouldn’t do a LDR. There are a number of issues that make it difficult to vet. The first thing that comes to mind is that psychological thing where people value things that they put effort into. If someone spends hours traveling somewhere, I feel there is a psychological bias to make the time spent together worthwhile. Meaning, you aren’t seeing the real person. They kind of have a vacation mentality. I personally feel that if someone is your soulmate (your ideal companion) you - or… | /r/RedPillWomen | 09/02/23 08:01 PM |
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