TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

Novadina Archive

View 2 posts and 6,743 comments by Novadina on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Showing the 1,000 most recent of 6,743 comments.
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
0

You didn’t even address what I said. Are my mother’s genes passed on to her grandchildren??? If yes, but her grandchildren share MORE of MY dna than hers, how can you say hers are passed on but mine aren’t? The whole human race is in fact related. All life on earth is related. But I’m just talking about percentages, like the percent you pass on to your own children is only 50%, and ~25% in grandchildren (17-34%). If that counts as passed on, then my mother has successfully done it, and so have I…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 05:13 PM
2

If my mother’s genes are “passed on” to me, then they are also “passed on” to my brother. We don’t make clones - so we are not actually passing our “unique DNA” to someone. We instead only pass 50% of our DNA - and you don’t know which 50%, it is random in your egg or sperm. A sibling usually has more than 50% shared DNA! So my brother has MORE of my genes than my mother! If she can be said to have “passed on” HER genes in my brother and in his children, then so have I - I’ve actually passed mor…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 09:33 AM
2

Why would that be though?? You think men won’t have sex with women who don’t center men? They certainly do. Even if that were true it wouldn’t necessarily mean genes aren’t passed on, because that’s not how genetics works. For example, I don’t even have kids and my genes have still passed to the next generation - because I have a brother who had kids. My brother is from the same parents as me, and has passed on those genes. Also I don’t think the behavior of “not centering men” is genetic! I am …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 12:00 AM
–

That is about lying and saying they love someone when it’s not true. But how would you not notice you have to spend a lot of money on a woman and pay her bills?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 11:06 PM
–

I am not sure how you couldn’t notice someone “gold digging”. Can you give an example of a non-obvious mode of this? The only thing I can think is how some men here have told me ALL women are gold diggers - that literally even liking a man means she is one, unless she is actively hitting on homeless men. Is that your opinion, or do you think somehow women are sneakily taking your money and you don’t notice?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 05:53 PM
2

Premature ejaculation refers to people with a penis. Women can’t prematurely ejaculate. Women finishing first is how it would work for both people to get off. When men cum first, their dick does not stay hard, making penetrative sex not possible. When women orgasm, penetrative sex is even easier to do, it doesn’t end it. In fact, I would highly recommend giving a woman an orgasm BEFORE any penetrative sex, for a good time. Also then you wouldn’t have to worry so much about premature ejaculation.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/26 02:53 AM
14

I earn way more than my partner, it doesn’t somehow turn me to a child at home. Can you explain why earning more money would make someone immature and not able to clean up after themselves?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 03:22 PM
–

What does “jester” mean in this context? You are having to sing and dance for women and you don’t like that? I don’t understand. Do you just mean they wanted to have a good time with you? Usually people want to date people who they find fun to be with. This goes for men as much as women. It would be kind of weird to want someone you found boring.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 07:11 AM
4

But I've been rejected by almost every intelligent, liberal/leftist women I've ever approached, despite checking off these intellectual boxes. Probably for another reason than the ones you listed above. I’ve rejected plenty of liberal men even though they met some of my standards because they were liberal. It’s not the ONLY standard. For example, I like to have something in common so we have things to do together. Also attraction is important, otherwise I just want to be friends. But if intellig…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 08:24 PM
1

Seriously? You live in a place you can just walk out the door and have food and shelter that night for free? In US you need money to pay for gas or a bus, to stay in a hotel or to rent an apartment, and for food. Even getting a job would mean you need money to get there, and they won’t pay you for 2 weeks.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 08:04 PM
1

What? I am saying one person controlling all the money is not healthy. Each person should be able to have at least some they can do what they want with. Each person should know what is going on with the finances and have an understanding of it - being in the dark is a problem. And if one person can’t even leave because they don’t have access to money, that’s not healthy.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 05:31 PM
2

They might not know that is problematic, maybe they had one parent control all the money and think that’s a healthy way to do it. It might even be done because the other partner says things like “I dont understand, you should just handle the finances”. My man was like that, but it concerned me because I saw my parents like that and one day my mom’s card didn’t work and she was shocked and didn’t realize we were out of money because my dad handled it all. So I made a point to explain to my husban…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 04:34 PM
2

First, why would I need to ask him? Is it a chore I normally do and I am asking him a favor? If so then I expect it to be done in the normal time for it. Is the trash full? Then probably it should have already been done, if it was my chore and I was asking then probably I need help and it should be done right then, so we can use the trash. It should never be too full to use. Is it his chore? Then if I’m asking presumably I’m cooking and can’t use the trash can or something because it’s full, so …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 03:42 PM
1

An example is one person could control the money and not give the other access.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 03:28 PM
1

When I first started dating online there were no pictures. One thing about your post I don’t get - pictures DON’T show height or job. So pictures are not why someone knows that - words are. And we would still describe ourselves! Always one of the first questions men asked me was my height and weight! Even when pictures did start to be used on dating sites that’s always men’s question to me. So men would not be interested in meeting me when they found out I was taller than them (and some of them …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 04:38 PM
11

You think women had to watch a female booty on a dick to pass their genes on?? Whose booty were they watching? And how did it result in their own genes getting passed - like they are watching their relatives getting fucked?!
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 07:22 AM
8

Yes, that is the commenters point.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 08:00 PM
2

Why would women marry men they don’t love? And why would men marry women who don’t love them? That can’t be that common. Most people who get married these days are probably in love with each other, at least in western countries. Definitely in places with arranged marriage that isn’t as common though.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 07:54 PM
–

You can say it's not personal, it's about "the bad​ people of your gender", "​if you take it personal it says m​ore ​about you", so on and so on​. A generalized mild disgust is still a generalized mild disgust, and it goes without saying that women feel that way about dating men. My man has a “mild disgust” for most men too, so he totally understands. Most men who have heard any stories about what women have had to deal with from men understand fine. I​magine if a guy was talking about dating wo…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 04:05 PM
6

I saw that post with the voice note. You left out details. She didn’t want sex on the first date. She wanted to go on a second date. He agreed, then left her a voice note to let her know he needed sex, and asking if she would be having sex that night, because if not, he didn’t want to go on a date at all. It was an unhinged voice note, seriously, and made it sound like he only wanted a sex dispensary and couldn’t bear that maybe taking a couple dates. She declined that offer. Not because he was …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 03:48 PM
–

Well lots of men on this sub think men do have that trait - a post earlier today (and many more comments) was saying Chad will fuck even ugly women and women they don’t like at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 02:21 AM
–

I assure you I am not getting turned on by money lol. Do you think women get orgasms when we get a paycheck?!
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 02:09 AM
–

I don’t think they are sexually attractive just by having money? Have you seen lots of women drooling over how hot Bill Gates is? Or Zuckerberg? All humans like money though - because it can be exchanged for anything we want! Men like money too, you seriously going to pretend you can’t understand that? So the equivalent to money is - money! Some men will risk their lives for money, murder for money, marry for money, etc. It’s the same exact desire for women. It’s not sexual attraction, it’s just…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 01:10 AM
6

I’m saying that’s insane. Women usually enjoy sex with men they are in love with who give them orgasms. Orgasms are very pleasurable, and thus most women enjoy it very much. Completely false that “most of them have sex transactionally” - in fact, very few women are prostitutes. Most women earn money from jobs, and with that can purchase things they need. They don’t need to have bad sex for any kind of “resource”. SOME women choose to do that for work but certainly not MOST. Sex that is not enjoy…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 01:04 AM
8

How did you get that from it? Because he said: I would say that most women in relationships are not genuinely attracted to their male partners, and instead have sex with them primarily out of obligation so that they can continue to secure commitment. … But it's incredibly rare for a woman to derive pleasure for herself directly from the act of sex. Seems clear he thinks it’s “incredibly rare” for women to enjoy sex. Which is crazy, and obviously false. Most women enjoy sex with men they are in l…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 11:49 PM
–

I am in my 40s, I’ve never seen this desperate stage in women you are talking about. The women I knew in my 20s who didn’t want kids didn’t have any, and the ones who had kids in their 20s and 30s knew they wanted kids, except for one who had an accident and didn’t want an abortion. Some didn’t know right away and had to decide, I didn’t know and thought about it a lot what way to go. None of this “all of sudden”. Just normal progression of life. Late 20s through the 30s seems a common time to d…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 11:29 PM
7

That’s not true, alimony is pretty rare these days, most people don’t get it.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 09:06 AM
4

That is just anxiety. Women face that kind of anxiety as well. The terror of realizing I’ve been drugged and can’t control my own body or speak, with a man much heavier than me on top of me and nothing I can do…. I am lucky I didn’t drink enough of it and was able to come to enough to scream and had other people in my apartment. Yet I never tried to be alone with a man I just met again, not worth that terror. It’s just not comparable to performance anxiety, which is hard, but worth the result of…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 07:49 PM
5

I haven’t really faced many of those advantages myself except not having to make the first move. I never had men throwing money at me, I’ve always had to pay for my own things. Maybe it’s because I didn’t go scouting for rich men or something, and dated men my age in my social circle, but I think that’s pretty normal. I asked my husband if he wanted to marry me, I am pretty sure it would have not happened if I never did that. The main thing I’m jealous of is safety. Men I know when faced with th…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 05:01 PM
–

But women face this same exact thing. I remember being excited that in college finally I could meet some nerdy guys who would like nerdy girls, as I was told that was where men who valued intelligence would be. But then when I went, the nerdy guys were all chasing the same girls all the guys were, the hot blond cheerleaders who wore a bunch of makeup and had hobbies like drinking and partying, not the quiet nerdy girls who had hobbies like reading and video games. When nerdy men would get with m…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 04:06 PM
1

And they get dozens of women ready to be friends within an hour?? I just really want to know what group has so many women dying for new friends to that degree. Majority of meetup groups I’ve tried have almost no women in them. I even tried one I thought would have more women (it was about crocheting) and it was mostly men! They were all hoping to find dates and knew nothing about crochet. I am not single and wanted friends, not sex, so it wasn’t that fun, men would stop talking to me when they f…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 11:00 PM
9

No, the men here are usually trying to convince women to change to what they want. They also freely announce what they like, and insist all men like the same things they do. They complain women sleep with too many men, and not with them. They announce how men only like young women, and old ones have no value. There is nothing for me to change with these, I can’t make myself young forever, and very few men would accept a relationship with no sex, and I wouldn’t want one either, so not having sex …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 05:16 AM
10

No men on here have tried to learn what kind of men I like. Not sure why that would mean I’m blind, you think men are asking me this and I missed it?? If a man has requested I do something because he likes it, and it’s an easy change, then yeah. Do I fake who I am to appeal to men? No. I learn about men, sure, and often use what I learn about them to avoid the kinds of men I don’t like. For example, I learned many men don’t like women, but pretend to because they want sex. So I try to make sure …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 03:10 AM
10

you see men try understand what type of men your into. we spend a lot of time on seeing your behaviour and trying to come to conclusion. I haven’t seen that, no. Anyone could just ask me and I would tell them what kind of men I am into. I don’t think it would work for a man to try to be what I am into if that is not who he is. I’m into nerds, you can’t easily pretend to be really interested and knowledgeable about a topic if you actually aren’t. how much time you spend learning about men? I have…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 02:10 AM
3

I used to make friends just going out to the bowling alley and meeting other people drinking there. We would find out if we have stuff in common by talking.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 01:12 AM
1

Meanwhile, women seem to have a much easier path to building new social circles. A halfway attractive woman can make a Facebook post saying she's looking for new girlfriends to grab brunch or go out with, and within an hour shell literally have dozens of other women wanting to hangout. Really?! This sounds great. I could use some local girlfriends. What Facebook group do I post this in???? Or was this only for NYC or other cities too? My guess is women have an abundance mindset due to absurd of …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 01:10 AM
3

I said it’s hard to find one that doesn’t have side effects. Most women just put up with the side effects. It’s pretty easy to not have kids and still have sex with a man who cares - I don’t even use any BC now and my man handles it. But finding a birth control for women with no side effects is hard, they all have some side effect. My favorite one that I loved and made me not get my period (my cycle is 3 weeks so that was helpful) I had to stop as my doctor said long term use causes bone loss. D…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 04:50 PM
1

painkillers are there for periods pain. There are? I’ve never found a single doctor willing to prescribe any painkillers for period pain. I’ve been suffering with it since I was 13. Is there a trick you can share to get these pain killers you are referring to that eliminate period pain? health issues in the current times have solutions. They do???? What is the solution for endometriosis, which many women suffer from? Or PCOS? Those are common conditions only women have, I know many women with it…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 04:27 PM
5

You think we are BORN with knowledge on “how to use sexuality to make income”?! Are you saying you think all women are born as prostitutes? We have knowledge on how to do it as some kind of genetic memory or something?! That’s crazy. I don’t have any knowledge about how to be a prostitute even after 40 years on this earth, I certainly wasn’t born with it! I’ve made income my entire life the same way men have, with a job, using skills I learned and studied hard for (I wasn’t born with any income-…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 04:07 PM
1

I never did get where the idea successful women couldn’t find men comes from. Sure, there probably are lots of men insecure about it, but there are also lots of men who aren’t. I work with a lot of high paid women and I can’t think of even one who is single. Very common for them to have met their SO in college or at work and be in a similar field.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 02:27 AM
1

If I was born male I’d probably be like my brother. He had no problem dating that I’ve ever heard about, he always was able to get girlfriends. He has a wife and an ex wife and 4 kids he didn’t have to give birth to and doesn’t do most of the work for, which was never an option available to me. We are in the same field but he was promoted to manager positions and makes a ton more money than me, and even he thinks being a man was a big reason for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 06:32 PM
–

I think a lot of people in relationships who want more sex but their partner doesn’t are like me. It started out a match. But life happens. Hormones change. Kids change things. Age changes things. You can’t predict the future. You can’t just say “oh you shouldn’t have married him”, because hindsight is 20/20. In real life it’s not predictable.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 04:11 AM
2

I haven’t personally noticed a difference talking with people based on their sex. I have noticed different people have different communication styles, and I do have to sometimes alter how I am talking to them based on that. But it just hasn’t been divided by gender, it varies more between individuals.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 03:04 AM
–

Conversations don’t predict the future. You can’t ask “so will your testosterone drop and affect your libido? What year?” Lmao
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 02:45 AM
–

How would one know in advance though?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 02:37 AM
–

It does bother me, there isn’t much I can do about it. But you are saying I should have not married him, as if I could have predicted the future.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 12:00 AM
–

I had no way to predict my man’s libido would drop so much as he got older. Was I supposed to be raping him all this time?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 11:50 PM
3

Wow. Maybe you don’t wear shirts with video games or other interests on it? Or don’t go places where other people like the same things as your shirt? My man has had multiple men tell him they like his shirt when was wearing his Destiny shirt, or his shirt for a car performance place he worked. Sometimes his work shirt has gotten us discounts at stores after the worker started a conversation about it and how they like it. I’ve seen it with guy friends too, when they wear shirts with cult classic …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 04:16 PM
1

A more “traditional” division of labor IS inherently oppressive BECAUSE it’s not based on an individual and their skills and desires but is based on gender. If you base the division on individuals, then it’s NOT “traditional”.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 04:08 PM
8

My husband has had men strike a conversation up about his shirt all the time when he is wearing something like a video game shirt. So maybe you don’t do it, but plenty of men do.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 05:11 PM
–

I have some female friends whose husbands do zero childcare, but all of those men insisted they weren’t sexist and would of course split all the childcare in discussions before kids are in the picture. They didn’t find out it wasn’t true until the child exists. At that point what is the woman supposed to do, she can’t just neglect the child 50% of the time. Her only way to get him to do half the work is often to divorce him and get a 50/50 child custody agreement - and the men almost never want …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 10:31 PM
18

You think pregnancy hasn’t been life altering since the 1600s?! My man, you need to go look up the lifelong consequences of pregnancy and labor. Medical technology has absolutely not eliminated those effects. The fact is it will permanently affect all woman, and there can be complications, and it’s not rare at all to have complications that can be traumatizing and life altering. Even a normal pregnancy can result in things like weight you can’t lose and saggy boobs and then your husband not bein…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 07:10 PM
7

I haven’t really ever found any actual reasons to have kids, except if you just want to because that’s what you want. I just never had any desire to be pregnant myself, or to care for babies. So because i never wanted kids, there isn’t actually anything “worth it” about pregnancy at all. Different people have different interests. However even women who want and have kids think abortion should be available. One of the most common reasons women have abortions is that they already have children who…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 07:06 PM
1

I see. It probably results in the same annoyances as with men, she will be jealous and controlling. That gets very tiring and most people don’t like it.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 06:59 PM
3

Paid work has many more interesting opportunities. Whereas unpaid work is all the same stuff, and many people find things like cleaning and changing diapers to be more boring than some of the job opportunities. So if you are hoping to find someone interested in taking on all the boring tasks for you, which also comes with the increased risk of not having any marketable skills for if something happens to the breadwinner, and also thinking they should be more interested in that because of their ge…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 05:55 PM
1

I can’t see it on a certain level. I’m talking more about the type of desperation where they have a good personality and are reasonably physically attractive and are genuinely a good partner based on their specs but are desperate to not be single. If they are attractive and fun, why would they be desperate? Desperate people have a reason for being so, an insecurity, a history of rejection, trauma, etc. On the female side a guy like that would probably fight to be the perfect man for you, not sur…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 05:35 PM
23

You can hardly open your Instagram for a few minutes without coming across anti-male content. I tried it out, I opened Instagram and spent 30 mins scrolling. I didn’t see a SINGLE post that was “anti-male content”. Mostly saw things like videos of water trails, nature content, crochet/knitting/sewing/crafting videos, music, cooking videos, art, boating. Seriously I couldn’t even find a single post with any kind of “anti male content”. I think you are getting that content because at some point yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 03:29 PM
–

Trans inclusive and pro-gay feminists certainly don’t believe in blank slate. They think people are born trans or gay, not that it’s socialized in. Rejecting what some people think “innate sex differences” but disagreeing they actually are innate, things like “women naturally can’t be educated as much as men” or “men are natural leaders” doesn’t mean they believe in blank slatism and that all differences are nurture over nature. They just reject those specific differences are nature, especially …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 11:29 PM
0

No they do not. They know women don’t want to be a bangmaid and will pretend they don’t want that either. Many say they are totally on board with equal cleaning until moving in or even after marriage, or on equal childcare until the baby is born. I have so many friends who broke up with men for this reason. And divorced mothers whose ex husbands were basically just another kid to care for (my friends used to joke one of our friends was a single mom, despite being married), they didn’t know he wo…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 06:09 PM
–

Despite the fact that this has been debunked by science, most feminists still operate under this belief. What?? Do you have evidence MOST feminists think that?? What feminist literature supports that belief? One example is that females and males on average have different libidoes. It shouldn't be controversial to say this yet it somehow is. There is a lot of science that shows that , on average, men have a higher libido than women. So? If people just accepted it then they would understand why so…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 07:15 AM
1

Aside from reproduction there is not anything “unique” a specific gender provides society. Reproductive abilities are how we are different. If you exclude that, the gender isn’t really that important, the value one provides is more about individuals and their individual abilities and skills. Men and women being equally valued does not mean society would be better off without men.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 07:15 PM
2

I have no problem with specialization. I have a problem with attaching gender to it. You acting like it’s the division of labor that is “traditional gender dynamics” but that’s wrong. It’s the fact it was divided by gender, not skill or desire or willingness or ability. Women were not given the opportunities to pick how they wanted to live their life like men were. If you divide labor up based on a conversation and everyone is free to choose how they want and it wasn’t just prescribed based on g…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 02:33 AM
14

It’s the fear that makes it so uncomfortable for me. Because I’ve experienced many men who react badly when I decline their advances, I can’t help but get nervous and uncomfortable when strange men hit on me and force me to reject them. And some men have been scary without me even having to reject them - them expressing their desire for me is sometimes a threat.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 03:51 PM
–

How a man acts and treats me IS expressing his personality traits!
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 03:48 PM
2

Lmao that doesn’t sound like “traditional gender dynamics”?! You didn’t even mention gender in the description! My relationship actually fits your description - because I do more paid work. My relationship is a non-traditional progressive relationship by everyone else’s standards! The woman being the breadwinner is not what I would call “traditional gender dynamics”, very unusual definition.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 03:38 PM
15

Depends on what you mean by “traditional gender dynamics”? Some of these “gender dynamics” might not be legal today! Like, I don’t think you should have a right to seek out young girls to purchase from their fathers. Consent in general has not been a traditional value, but is a legal requirement now. But if you just mean you want to find a partner who wants to be your housewife (willingly), then of course - you are free to run your relationship with another consenting adult how you both want.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 01:23 AM
3

I see. Well if it’s an actual concern that women are getting assaulted by men exiting elevators, and men are not, then yeah I think men should help their poor girlfriends from getting assaulted if they can. That doesn’t mean he values her life MORE, it means he values it at all! Who would just stand there and watch their partner get groped by a random dude? If that’s a legit thing women need to deal with just dealing with elevators and just stepping there stops it, who wouldn’t do that. And also…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 10:06 AM
3

As I said, I do like protective men. I believe people protect ones they care about. It wouldn’t align with my values if he just didn’t care about my safety and do whatever he could to protect it, as I would him. I’m just not that concerned with being harmed by seeing inside an elevator. So that example was kind of silly as it’s not protecting anything at all. But I gave a better example of the kind of protection I like in my original comment - making sure I get home safe, protecting me from othe…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 09:40 AM
3

Puts himself in harms way by blocking her from seeing in an elevator? Lol I’m sorry I don’t believe this is a real thing many people are concerned about. And it really doesn’t sound like he’s treating her life as more valuable. What exactly might he see in a car or an elevator that is threatening his life? Like other men or something? What about when she’s not with him, he still has to face the elevator even alone - is he treating his own life as not valuable by not carrying a shield or what?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 08:48 AM
6

I have never even thought of those things or heard of them, much less have some love based on them. I have no idea how standing in front of someone at the elevator would be helpful, that sounds very strange. I guess I prefer men who are just normal and not even thinking of any weird rules saying not to let women see inside elevators.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 08:13 AM
5

If you and your boyfriend made the same amount of money and you both spent basically the same amount of money on each other, would you build up animosity or love him just as much as if he spent like 5 times what you spend on him? Who knows, I’ve never been with someone who spent 5 times as much money on me, because I’ve never dated anyone rich I guess. I made more money than all my boyfriends. It would be hard to find someone so far outside of my economic bracket. I doubt my love would be based …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 04:59 AM
6

What? I doubt that. You are giving yourself anxiety over nothing.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 10:45 PM
8

I have never known this to happen to a single woman in my entire life, not even a story of someone who knew someone. I think this would be incredibly rare and is really not something you have to worry about.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 08:12 PM
43

Why are there so many career driven woman that still expect a very wealthy man to provide for their lifestyle with no sacrifice whatsoever? Are there? I’m a career woman and this meet lots of other career women at work. None of them are with a “very wealthy man”, they are usually with career men, often in the same or related career. I don’t think I’ve met even a single woman “expecting a wealthy man to provide for her lifestyle”, I really doubt this is that common. Why the hell do I see so many …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 03:00 AM
2

But I think most people need to experience desire and boost their confidence or self-esteem. I was looking forward to casual sex when I became an adult because I thought it would be fun. In reality very few men seemed to have any interest in a mutually fun time, so it really wasn’t that great. I’ve heard similar from men, that it’s not as fun as they thought it would be. Most women have had at least one casual sex experience, and the guys they sleep with are usually more attractive than the men …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/26 09:07 PM
1

No, generally I don’t invest too much time in figuring out people’s secret feelings. I can barely detect flirting tbh, I need people to be direct in their communication. I had no idea my husband was into me until he asked me out. However he definitely didn’t seem disinterested, I just thought he liked me as a friend, and possibly was into my roommate. Not sure why I thought that - I guess because 99% of my guy friends were into her lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/26 08:54 PM
–

I’ve had great sex with both experienced and inexperienced men, and same with bad sex. I don’t think that’s super relevant to a man’s skills in bed honestly. The men who are better in bed are the ones who care to make it a mutually fun time, pay attention to my responses, touch me in all places, and not just focus on their own dick or getting off themselves. That attitude can be found in men with all levels of experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 10:50 PM
3

I go hiking and to the movies and to comedy clubs and stuff with my friends. I could rely on them for an emergency I believe. In OPs scenario I wouldn’t be able to go hiking with them, as I wouldn’t have any friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 05:47 PM
10

Ok well that isn’t what your OP says. It literally says “having no friends”
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 06:30 AM
10

Agree, me too. But OPs scenario specifically called out being “home all day” and “having no friends”. So it specified being home all day, not me. And doesn’t seem like I could go kayaking, for example, a huge hobby of mine but one I need to go with someone (I can’t carry the kayak on my own, plus I would be nervous going in the ocean solo).
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 06:16 AM
8

Because your scenario said “being a homebody all day and having no friends”. So, okay, I can crochet, but what about non-solo hobbies?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 06:14 AM
13

The love of my life would not make me be a homebody all day. So it’s hard for me to reconcile that. The love of my life would want to go out and live life with me, we would visit family and friends and engage in mutual hobbies. I would prefer to engage in my hobbies and passions, neither of these seem to be that option. But out of them, career is closer - since I could make at least some of my hobbies be a career, which then also gives me money to engage in the other hobbies! Being home alone al…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 03:40 AM
11

As long as he is still in to me and monogamous I don’t really care what attributes other people he is attracted to have. I don’t even see how it would change anything or why he would even tell me. What would the point of telling me he is attracted to someone not me?! Why would he do that? I’d be more concerned about that than the genitals of the person. The fact he is telling me would make me suspect he is considering breaking up or opening the relationship, otherwise why would he say anything. …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 04:57 AM
1

Definitely doesn’t require being 6’4” to be considered attractive, but I’m sure how much it matters depends on the woman. It’s a whole picture thing for me, some men shorter can be more attractive than other taller men - the face is probably most important, and then the body shape over the height. I tend to be most attracted to men around my height or taller, I am around average male height. There are a lot of other things I am more attracted to about men than being some super height, like body …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 03:28 AM
1

I mentioned other things than sex. For example, a common problem I hear men say progressives aren’t fixing is that women are in the workplace and sometimes get a job a man applies to, even though it is supposed to be known that men are automatically better than women. They even have started a whole thing online that all women are doing “fake work”. Another one is men feel it’s unfair now that women can get educated that they are doing more of it than men, even though, once again, it’s supposed t…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 12:21 AM
2

Yes that is a problem, but one I think progressives have supported. They are the ones suggesting therapy and to address these harmful gender norms. OP is saying men have problems progressives are ignoring or dismissing.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 12:15 AM
0

I think most of the real problems are problems both genders are facing. Those seem to be the ones men talk about being specific to men only.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 12:11 AM
5

Oh I see. That sounds like a bit too much mental health drama for me, I suppose it if it had been years and they seemed to have resolve it I would be open to it, but I’d have serious reservations.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 07:55 PM
13

No, I would not start sleeping with hundreds of men to prevent them killing themselves. I don’t see why it would be my responsibility, and what it would serve to sacrifice my own mental health and wellbeing to potentially help someone else’s. I already find it to be serious and I donate to causes towards helping teens and young adults as I have used those services when I was a teen and it helped me. No. No absolutely not. Would you be willing to have sex with men to help their mental health?! I …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 07:51 PM
4

I don’t know what any of those terms or acronyms mean. What is detrans? Like a trans person who isn’t going to do surgery? I would date a trans man if I was attracted to him. But if he had boobs I probably wouldn’t be.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 07:31 PM
-1

How exactly should progressives speak to men’s problem of men not able to get women to have as much sex as they want and feeling upset about things like that they can’t get a woman to do all the cleaning and childcare for them like they think their grandfathers got, or they have to compete with women in jobs even though they feel they are automatically better than all women? I just don’t think progressives are going to want to solve those problems for men, frankly, because they are personal issu…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 07:28 PM
4

So does that mean you are submissive too, or does your woman have to come home to an argument? Weird to describe that submissive means not starting an argument. Seems like men would need to be submissive too, unless you are saying men should be starting arguments constantly…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 04:02 PM
3

No, I would not want to change my wonderful marriage to be a sex slave. Wtf?! How would it be legally enforced, cops will come hold me down? I would never want to be with a man who even wanted this. Why would you want legal permission to rape your wife? Do you know how fucked up that is? My man protects me from men who want to hurt me - he doesn’t want to hurt me himself!! Think about this for any activity you enjoy - aside for t he fact penetration is extremely invasive - literally no one wants…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 09:42 PM
1

Ok, so what clothes should I wear if I want men who usually look at me to not?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 02:52 PM
0

No I really do want an outfit that makes men not see my boobs and think I am smart. I don’t know how to dress to accomplish that as anything I’ve ever worn I am still visibly a woman with boobs. Please post links to outfits, for real!
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 02:35 PM
1

I work in tech at home. I’ve worked in many offices though. Women wear all kinds of different things as tech places usually don’t have a dress code. Men would still look at me and my boobs no matter what I wear though, there aren’t clothes that alter men’s behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 02:33 PM
2

Whether you like it or not, dressing revealingly or accentuating features of your sexual body parts would always garner attention to your physical appearance. I hear this a lot, but in my experience men are actually attracted to women’s bodies - NOT clothing. As a woman I have attracted attention to my physical appearance by existing. Unless I were to wear a burka or something, they can see me and what I look like! Do you have any evidence that it is actually the clothing that attracts men? Can …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 11:58 PM
0

What? What is because of that? My success? Like I said, I’d probably do as good as my brother, who is a guy, and he has done fine. I’ve approached men. But not cold approached them, just like I wouldn’t do as a man either. I’ve also never went on a date with any of the strangers who have approached me. I don’t know a single couple who met by a cold approach. I don’t think that’s a very successful method. So I disagree that it’s necessary. If my brother (who is what I would look like as a man) or…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 11:42 PM
1

I didn’t settle, I waited for a man to meet my standards and who would treat me the way I deserve. That doesn’t mean I wanted someone “superior”, it means I wanted someone compatible. Everyone should have standards and be with someone who treats them right! What I filtered for - of course attractiveness (which height is part of) - because why would I want to be with a man I am not attracted to?! Normal, and men do it too. Very few men want a woman they aren’t attracted to, that would be abnormal…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 03:27 AM
3

I’d probably do as good as my brother, since he is very similar to me, and looks like a male version of me. He is not lonely, he’s married and has kids, and he’s had girlfriends since he was 16. I probably wouldn’t cold approach strangers - that has never once worked on me as a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 05:01 PM
–

One of the most “soft jobs” ever is software engineer and it’s mostly men! And plenty of them like it and don’t hate it. I know a few men who not only like their job - they spend their free time at tech conferences talking about it!
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 01:04 AM
1

Yes, I have male friends, some of them I’ve had for 20 years. Most of the time when I hang out with my friends (of any gender) they bring their SO and I bring mine, although occasionally someone isn’t into an activity and doesn’t come. I guess I don’t really spend “extend periods of time” with anyone as I’m pretty introverted and don’t socialize frequently, when I do it’s usually in small groups based around an activity.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 12:58 AM
3

Ladies, why do women say “don’t objectify me” while going on to post provocative photos and dress proactively in public? Then get upset when someone comments on it? Because what is the connection? Clothing doesn’t cause other people to objectify me - they do that. And they do it no matter what the clothing is. So I might as wear what I want because clothing doesn’t have mind altering abilities. Perhaps YOU do some kind of value assessment on a woman’s clothing before objectifying her, to judge i…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/26 12:06 AM
6

You cycle through many men in relationship and sexual experience This is called “dating”. I didn’t have a magic genie that materializes a husband - I had to meet people and date until I met someone compatible. Sometimes we weren’t, sometimes boyfriends dumped me, sometimes relationships didn’t happen. Exactly how else was I supposed to find a long term relationship without dating men?! and usually you downplay it as the 'past'. No “downplaying” it at all. I indeed dated people, as do most men as…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 07:03 AM
1

Yes it was, the comment you replied to said people who have sex to feel good are the people who actually enjoy sex, and unlike them conservative women don’t really like men and have sex for different reasons. Anyway I don’t think you are that unusual and it seems you are just agreeing with the parent comment really, just seeing it as a positive not a negative. I’ve met quite a few men who seem to feel the way you do, they just don’t verbalize it as well or insist it’s not true, whereas you descr…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 06:45 AM
–

What do you mean I would never find it appealing? I tried it and literally did find it appealing. Are you saying I wouldn’t find it appealing with another woman, and it’s only because I did it with a man I liked it? That might be true, but because I’m straight!
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 06:42 AM
1

One of the positives was that they don’t enjoy sex? So are you asexual, or you just prefer having sex where the other person isn’t that into it or something?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 03:28 AM
–

Isn’t it actually legal to rape your wife there? Why would they be collecting stats on something they think is fine? If one country has a crime and publishes statistics, you can’t seriously claim that country is committing it more than the one it’s legal and accepted in.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 03:19 PM
9

I’m a millennial too, I work with a lot of young people and many of them are dating someone they met at work. Why would it “ruin your career”?? I work in Big Tech, my company has entire HR sections for how to handle if your spouse also works there and it’s very common. Can’t think of a single person whose career was ruined over it, but can think of a dozen couples who met at work.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 02:43 PM
3

So you think women trying some very specific kinks you have in your mind “ruins” them? Does it ruin the men too? Why not just consider people who want that when you don’t incompatible? Porn introduces most of the extreme stuff to people, if anyone is ruining anything it’s that, not having sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 02:32 AM
6

Lmao me having a fun sex life doesn’t make me “ruined”. God forbid someone showed me a spot on my body or his that feels amazing and so then I know about it and can continue to do the thing and have more fun. That kind of idea is exactly what I mean by having the need to filter out these weird stuffy attitudes that ruin the fun. Especially when they have fantasies themselves they find “shameful” but expect women to not have any fantasies. Sex is so much better when people are open and not judgy …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 06:36 PM
4

I would only do things I’m comfortable with. Doesn’t mean he can’t tell me them. Same with me telling him mine. Then when something sounds interesting we do those things. Some things can be kept fantasy only. Why would sexual fantasies be “shameful”? Why would me indulging them so we have a fun time in bed prevent “building him up”? I guess if he has like serial killer fantasies that would be shameful, and no one has ever told me any like that. I’d be scared to hear that, to be fair, like I’d pr…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 05:28 PM
5

Sure that is true. But some men won’t open up about anything, and the sex is never going to get amazing then ime. So I tried to pick guys who are more open, even if it’s not everything. I find once they see I am not judgmental about sexual fantasies and even that I am willing to participate in fulfilling them (even if just as roleplay), they do tend to open up. I’ve had men I’m with tell me some extremely kinky or taboo (or even illegal if it were to move beyond fantasy) desires.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 04:28 PM
5

I made effort to find men who are open sexually and not keeping it hidden or having weird hangups like disliking if I enjoy sex. I am a sexually open person and so sought like minded men. I like men more sexually adventurous and who want to explore things with me. Usually it’s not just opened up on day one, but once we are comfortable with each other. There are some things I’ve only told my husband, because that level of comfort I’ve got with him was just never reached with anyone else.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 03:55 PM
1

No. The guys I had casual sex with were similar in looks or less attractive to the guys I had relationships with, or would literally be the same guy (like casual sometimes become relationship). Especially the hookups at parties, those guys were nothing special, just being cute and at the right place at the right time. My boyfriends were much hotter, no alcohol needed. And no, someone being a “Chad” doesn’t automatically make me want a relationship with them. Like I said, my requirements for a re…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 03:41 PM
2

Not really, because most men want women to not fuck other men. They REALLY don’t want them to. It’s insane to discount men’s jealousy as if it isn’t a known thing world-over. And women are able to get casual sex easier, so chances are higher she has way more options for it than him. The only way to get her to not fuck any of them is to get her commitment to be monogamous.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 08:25 AM
7

You are describing having LOWER standards than the person you are replying to. He is saying he expects satisfying sex, no matter what, so even if the woman was a virgin - whereas you say you are fine with sex not being what you want, except if you find out the woman had done something with another man, and only then you suddenly care. So he is saying he had those standards without qualification - yours is only based on what she did in the past, so lower standard. It’s pretty low standards where …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 08:10 AM
3

No of course I had to be attracted to him. But I didn’t need us to be compatible for a long term relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 07:51 AM
13

It just hasn’t matched my experience. Perhaps it’s different in US or in my area (liberal state). Usually men wanted to turn casual things to a relationship because they wanted me to sleep exclusively with them. It was never me bringing it up, if I started as casual then that was what I wanted at the time. Also, every woman I know has had much higher standards for relationships than casual sex. Like I don’t care anything about if someone casual has a job, cleans up after himself, or if I can spe…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 11:21 PM
–

I would never “submit” to men, regardless of chores I do or don’t do. The truth is, we envision a woman on her hands and knees scrubbing floors and wiping sweat from her brow while doing dishes by hand when that's usually not the case. That’s never what I imagine. I always imagine scrubbing shit off the toilet bowl. Someone else’s shit! What adult would expect someone else to clean their literal shit? The solution to "I'm worn out because of household chores" is simple: go sit down and take a br…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 10:32 PM
8

What orifice of yours was painfully penetrated to buy a woman some flowers? You seriously want a woman to put up with uncomfortable sex acts she doesn’t want to do, because you buy her flowers and go out and eat dinner together?! Does eating the meal actually make you that uncomfortable?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 07:26 PM
13

I am not getting the same sentiment from the post, she never used the word "ask", uses language like "repeatedly pushing someone into uncomfortable sexual experiences" which is the opposite of asking and is closer to physically forcing someone to do something. The title of the post is literally “why do you ask your partner to do sex acts she does not like?” And then she is talking about coercion, like trying to convince a woman to do it. Repeatedly pushing someone to do something means verbally …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 04:58 PM
25

Sounds like she is saying men are asking women to do it, not physically forcing them. She is saying men ask women to do things and even if she doesn’t want to, they still want her to. I think that’s extremely weird, but many men have said here (and an ex has told me the same thing) that women doing unwanted sex acts for their boyfriend “shows how much she loves him”. Men here have said if they find out a woman was willing to have anal and be uncomfortable for a previous man, then if she doesn’t …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 04:33 PM
6

I have a brother who has lived a similar life to mine, same upbringing, same location, similar looks… So it’s easy to see some differences gender had. So, I have the “advantage” that more men desire me than women desire him. Is it an advantage though? It has often felt like a target is drawn on my back. I don’t just attract a man I want - I attract a whole bunch of scary men in addition. Some of them have stalked me, threatened me, drugged and attempted to rape me. I have had multiple scary inci…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 04:16 PM
8

The woman will be like “why you gotta finish so fast? I didn’t even get to finish…” and he’ll be like “it’s because you have weak knees! I workout mine daily to pound you efficiently, you just put in no effort!”
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 03:41 AM
2

Yeah, but not OP! Apparently he is putting Herculean effort TO cum. And then he just blames her for having weak knees when she can’t cum as quick.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 03:36 AM
2

No I need to feel his presence, feel his body hair on my skin, smell him, feel his body heat, hear his voice, feel his body against mine, feel his lips on mine, see into his eyes. That has nothing to do with affirming my attractiveness lol. It’s about the man himself. Claiming porn is a more “accurate presentation of a person” than the actual person is hilarious 🤣
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 11:35 PM
26

Damn, this kind of sex sounds bad, I’d rather just not do it at all if that’s how it would be. The kind of sex I enjoy is where my partner wants make me feel good, and I want to make him feel good. So he actively gets me off because that’s how we have sex. I don’t have boring sex like you describe where we each knee ourselves to orgasm somehow, instead my man eagerly eats pussy and does other things that feel good. Really confused how you think “stronger knees” would help orgasms?! How exactly d…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 04:38 PM
3

Sure, but their example was someone who enjoys romance and sex with men, just not porn. I’m sorry, I just don’t think that is a description of an asexual person, it’s just a normal person who isn’t into porn.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 10:23 PM
5

Your claim is that “enjoying looking at pictures” IS sexuality, but “enjoying actual sex” IS NOT? That seems backwards. How do you know being into real sex is not the true sexuality, and men attracted to pixels on a screen are the ones not actually straight? I am a woman who is not attracted to pixels in any way, and “enjoys romance and sex with men”. I am not asexual. I am into real men who are actually present with me. I am not into women - they don’t turn me on, they don’t have that same sens…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 10:19 PM
11

You said she enjoyed romance with a man, and enjoyed sex with a man. If she doesn’t enjoy those things with women also, she’s straight. You not understanding her sexuality because it doesn’t involve porn doesn’t mean it’s not present.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 04:17 PM
20

If she “enjoys the physical act of sex” I don’t think she’s asexual??? If she enjoys sex with men she’s straight or bi, not asexual lol. Just because women aren’t into nude pictures of male bodies they don’t know, the way men’s sexuality works, doesn’t mean the sexuality is not present. I’m attracted to men. Never in my life has a still photo of a man I don’t know got me aroused. I need to feel the presence of a man near me, smell his scent, feel his body hair. If I have strong emotions for him …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 03:54 PM
1

This is not just a blue pill thing in this sub, there are posts right now from red pillers where they do the same thing. It’s like saying “it’s not a good idea for women to walk alone down dark alleys in shady neighborhoods at night”, and the response is “How dare you, women should be able to do whatever they want without fearing for their safety.” Okay, but that’s not the discussion. We’re talking about what is, not what should be. Just a few posts before yours there are repellers insisting to …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 03:03 AM
–

21% of US women experience rape or attempted rape. That’s more than enough for all women to be concerned about it and to take precautions when dating men. Especially in the stage of going to a place alone with them. Men can be very scary, and being a woman attracts predatory men. To date men means addressing this reality, and meeting new men also means encountering the scary men too. Also it’s not just rape, sexual coercion and sexual harassment is also a common issue when dating men.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 07:24 PM
–

What percent would make it a valid concern for you? If you thought 1% of your dates have intent harm you, would you consider it a concern while dating? If you had a jar of 100 m&ms and one was poisonous, would you be concerned when eating one? The majority of women have experienced a man who wants to hurt them, and it’s scary when it happens, and our friends and family have told us of times it has happened to them. So we are often cautious about it to make sure it doesn’t happen to us or doesn’t…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 07:14 PM
–

It absolutely DOES happen on average in dating to women. Nearly every woman who has dated men has encountered men who want to rape them or push sexual boundaries or coerce them into things they don’t want to do. It’s not a dating issue MEN face, but absolutely is a normal dating issue WOMEN face.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 02:50 PM
5

By framing this as something I would “let him access”, it makes it sound like you mean a sexual act I personally don’t like (often meaning it’s painful or uncomfortable), that I “let” my husband do to my body despite the fact I don’t want it. That’s pretty disturbing to me, I’ve been with guys who felt doing things like painful sex acts they see in porn would “prove my love” or some shit, but I find it gross to even want me to do that. My husband would never even want to do something I don’t wan…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/26 07:07 PM
–

You are misunderstanding, it’s the other way around. Or for an angle/curve issue it just means doing different positions more compatible, so as to not hit painful spots but pleasurable ones.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 05:13 AM
–

What? Obviously different anatomical shapes affects how bodies fit together. You think it’s a double standard if a larger penis size hurts someone with some activities???
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 01:39 AM
–

There’s been positions I’ve thoroughly enjoyed with previous boyfriends but can’t do with my current partner - because of anatomy differences. Body parts come in different sizes and angles can be different. With some guys I like positions that get things deeper, with others I need the opposite and avoid those positions as they hurt. With guys curved a certain way I like some positions and with guys curved the opposite way I prefer facing the opposite way. These guys expecting all sex to be the s…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 01:20 AM
5

I married my partner when I was 35, but we were together many years before that, but he was over 30 when we started dating (it’s not clear if your question is about the woman being 30 or the man?). Nothing inherently changed when I turned 30 that made me suddenly not attracted to him. If I were to date again, I would only date men I am attracted to. I see no reason why I would ever do otherwise.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 01:08 AM
1

For me it kind of depends on context. I would want to know why, what the circumstances are. Then I would decide to leave or not. I’ve been with my husband 20 years, and I’d be so shocked if he cheated, I would feel like there must be more to the story. I also feel like I’d be able to forgive a once in a lifetime mistake in some circumstances. If it happened in the first few years of dating I’d just leave for sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 01:40 AM
0

Depends on what you are including. Like would I pay for dates and get a low match rate if it meant I didn’t have to deal with the stalking, drugging, attempted rape, and risking pregnancy that I had to deal with? Yes. Those things were *terrifying* for me. Having a low match rate and paying for dates doesn’t really scare me.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/26 01:17 AM
0

Sounds like she’s interested, so why not? I’m not really understanding what the dilemma is here.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 01:37 AM
1

How old were you when you had your first kiss? What kind of kiss? A boy kissed me on the lips when I was like 6. First French kiss was at 15. First relationships? 15. Casual sex? 18. How many relationships/partners have you had? I’ve been in 5 relationships. What's the longest you've gone single/sexless? Not sure, maybe around 6 months. Do you find sex and dating to be unimportant? No, it was important to me because I wanted to find a lifelong partner. I didn’t enjoy dating much, or casual sex, …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/26 09:13 PM
–

Yes it probably is, I’m an early millennial. I felt it was archaic even then, and yet I kept encountering it. I thought for sure the men of my generation wouldn’t expect that nonsense, but they did. But many were ones you yourself listed, so apparently it persists. Like you said as a man you felt the expectation to make the decisions, so of course it makes sense on the other side of that the woman is expected to be okay with that and to not make the decisions. Same with you said you expect women…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/26 03:41 AM
3

Ok YOU brought up double standards, not me, so now saying you aren’t trying to talk about that is weird. And I literally answered C in my first comment, and that’s when you brought up “asymmetry in expectations” - which is why I pointed out how vastly different they were - how men’s expectations are much more enjoyable things, so of course more men are into that than women are into the boring things like cleaning or being in pain. Then claiming you feel women just don’t face any, then listing a …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/26 08:14 AM
3

Well your example of “double standards” wasn’t really double standards at all. First, you say it doesn’t matter which gendered expectation is worse. But it does, because that explains why women don’t want to do it! Because it’s unenjoyable things, men don’t want to do those things they want from women either! Being a woman doesn’t magically make me enjoy being in pain or getting bossed around and expected to agree with anything a man says. You are asking “why is there a double standard” but if w…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/26 06:33 AM
4

If you feel like women are upset with you for wanting them to “perform their gender role” then surely you must see there ARE gendered expectations for women, otherwise what on earth are you actually expecting that is upsetting them? I can’t help you with how to find women more into that. The expectations on women are generally terrible, I don’t want to do most of it and don’t blame anyone for not wanting to. Men’s expectations are much more exciting and fun - for example women have “wear high he…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/26 04:53 AM
3

I don’t have gendered expectations, except be physically appealing to me sexually which as a man would probably be different than if I wanted a woman. In my relationship I’m the technical one, the planner, the ambitious one, have the successful career, and a bunch of others. For me I just tried to look for someone compatible with me. I don’t like the common female expectations, like wear makeup, dress up or look good all the time, be meek, don’t be ambitious or competitive, don’t be too smart (s…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/26 12:33 AM
15

Imagine falling for a scam, wouldn’t you feel stupid after? And embarrassed to admit to being so dumb?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/26 12:25 AM
5

Ah, you “aren’t into other men”?? Well that’s just being silly! Sounds like you are causing your own dating struggles then. But you can change right? Since you expect women to “change in any way that would make it easier for men to have sex with them” - why don’t YOU just change in that way?? Problem solved! If you can’t change to make yourself want sex with “any type of men”, why would you think women could?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/26 05:09 PM
6

Well then men’s sexuality is silly too! Why won’t you just do this genital rubbing with other men? You would solve two men’s problems! Why are you being judgmental and brutal and not changing in a way that would make it easier for any type of man to date or have sex with you??
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/26 04:31 PM
–

What?? What age was this supposed to happen? I don’t think anyone set my alarm lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 07:16 AM
2

There doesn’t necessarily have to be women at the actual events or hobbies. The point of “being more social” is to know more people, have more friends. Because then those people invite you to more things, they invite you to parties and gatherings or to the movies or whatever, and you meet more of their friends. Many people I know met their SO through a friend of a friend. So making friends with men also works, then you could meet their girlfriend and one of her friends when you hang out say. It’…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/26 04:40 PM
3

Do you think most guys suffer the consequences of the actions of the few that are dangerous? Most? No. Few men are in jail for rape, much less most of them being in there for it when they didn’t even rape anyone! I think a small number of men suffer consequences for other men’s violence. The ones that do are the ones that are assaulted by men. There are some men that I have come across that were dangerous. And all though I have personally never been sexually assaulted myself I have seen other me…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/26 04:31 PM
2

I have pets and they hide from the robot or bark or hiss at it, but it isn’t offended. It’s great for keeping the pet hair under control.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 07:42 PM
2

I have been quite a few men’s first, including my husband who was a virgin at 30, but there is no amount that could even make a dent in even just the men who complain on this sub. Also I think they usually aren’t looking for the women like me who are into shy men, many of these guys on this sub insist I am “masculine” and they want ultra-feminine virgins. Or I’ve suggested they participate in the kinds of things I did to meet the men I’ve been with and they hate the idea and tell me it would be …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 07:36 PM
8

Yes, I do. One problem is most men aren’t really looking for women to just believe them. They want women to fuck them. I’m not actually interested in fucking hundreds of men who struggle dating. Women want men to believe them about how common sexual assault is, and to not sexually assault them. That seems quite a bit easier to do than to fuck 100 men.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 04:50 PM
3

In your honest experience, do you believe the dating and sexual marketplace has been noticeably easier for the average woman than for the average man over the last 10–15 years (roughly 2010 to now)? If yes, why? If no, why not? I think it’s always been easier, but riskier. Men have been the “chasers” a long time, that didn’t start in 2010. So it is “easier” to be chased. But it’s much riskier to date as a woman because some men who desire you will not take no for an answer. That is quite scary w…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 06:16 AM
1

Depends on why it’s lower I suppose. Like is it because women don’t have the legal right to divorce? That is kind of taking advantage of an immoral system… Is it because of their religion? Then it is kind of immoral if you were to fake believing in a religion just to marry someone… But if you actually believe that and want to move somewhere that more people in your religion live that doesn’t seem bad. But keep in mind the divorce rate is probably about people who grew up in that country, it woul…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 05:49 AM
6

Most companies don’t refuse people dating coworkers. Most corporations I worked at it was even common to be dating or married to another person who worked there, my HR site has a whole section to how to handle married coworkers with regards to insurance and stuff. It’s even more common to be with someone in the same industry, nearly every woman I know in tech is with a man also in tech. People generally date people in their circles.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/26 05:44 PM
3

Absolutely. The requirements for long term are usually the same as short term plus additional requirements to make for a compatible person to live with and be a partner. For example, let’s say I’m dating a man and he’s great in bed and I think I like him for long term. He keeps his apartment clean, he wants some of the same future things I want. But then he says his mom cleans his apartment for him, and be wants to marry someone and have her cook and clean for him. This man would be moved from l…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/26 05:10 PM
5

How exactly do I use the power of being desired by others? Mostly it feels like it puts a target on my back. I’ve had a lot of scary incidents purely because men strongly desire women and some will try to take what they desire. And I can’t exactly hide it, like a rich person can hide their valuables to avoid being targeted, but I can’t hide my boobs.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/26 05:01 PM
11

How is it a power to be a prostitute for a provider? That’s just a job, that’s not power. I am pretty sure I make more money at my real job than what I could get from someone else by using them like that, and I don’t even have to feel like shit by using anyone nor do I have to fake desire for someone or have sex with someone I don’t like. This sounds like a truly terrible job, and I probably couldn’t pull it off as I can’t “lead people on” really since I am a terrible liar. How is having the opp…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/26 04:56 PM
10

Can you please tell me how to leverage it?? I’m ready to not be blind to my privilege. I’d love to take advantage of it instead, power sounds nice! My brother hasn’t seemed to have a harder life than me so it’s certainly not obvious how to use this power, but you can always just tell me. Hell, he got stuff by being a man I had no chance for, like having his children without having to be pregnant or give birth, I would have to pay a surrogate for that which is quite expensive. Like if I am bourge…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/26 09:23 AM
14

They do have power, and they easily use it to make themselves richer to have all kinds of luxuries. Money is power and that’s what they have. Men wanting to fuck me doesn’t result in anything tangible for me, it’s something men like to claim is “power” but it isn’t actually useful for anything.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/26 03:40 AM
1

I pretty much rejected all marriage traditions. We didn’t have a wedding, we went to the courthouse, in beach clothes. We didn’t change any names, and we don’t wear any rings. My husband and I are just pragmatic people, I think. We have other things we’d rather spend our time and money on than some tradition neither of us care about. My parents also didn’t do any of those traditions, it’s not unusual in my family.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/26 12:09 AM
2

Do you also think the “successful channels” selling get rich quick schemes and pyramid schemes means their customers are actually getting rich? If so, I have a bridge to sell you. These guys love to target lonely men who want a secret to “unlock” access to sex, but it doesn’t exist, so the men keep coming back for more. They are told they just weren’t watching enough, paying enough, or doing enough, and if they buy one more course they will finally be able to get laid. It’s not evidence of succe…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/26 11:46 PM
4

Concealer is not for concealing age, it’s for concealing discoloration on spots, like pimples. For looking younger you would probably do better with primer and foundation.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/26 06:54 PM
–

OP said, “But in reality the opposite is true. Women think men want a feminine calm graceful woman while what men actually like is a woman with a man's personality.” So I think OP is claiming the opposite is true from what you are saying.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/26 06:41 PM
11

What “product”? You are talking about the PUA grifters? They claim they are selling you some “secret method to get laid”, but there is no actual secret method to get laid. Most normal people don’t charge money for advice, much less “make millions”, they just give advice to friends in normal conversations. If someone is making millions off of advice, they are probably full of shit and it’s a grift to get money out of lonely men.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/26 06:33 PM
5

I don’t care if someone doesn’t want to date. I know some women who had too many scary things happening from dating who chose to stop (like stalkers and date rape), and I can understand as I have faced those things myself, although I considered it worth the risk because I had a strong desire to have a relationship and only faced scary things a couple times. Can’t say I have heard of scary things actually happening from men, though, most of the time men have stated there are scary risks, it’s thi…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 05:34 PM
3

I’m not really into “being told what to do” tbh. My dad and husband would never lol. My boss might request I do things, but I am getting paid specifically to do those things and she is just relaying it, even then she barely asks really, more like telling me what the business needs are and I have to figure out what tasks to do to achieve that on my own. But she does ask me to do things like the regular corp trainings everyone is required to do. I also have employees myself in my side business wit…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 02:16 AM
3

That’s terrible! Wtf And yes you are right I should have listed more reasons why it’s hard to leave.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/26 03:17 PM
6

“Easier than before” and “easy” are not the same thing. Improvement doesn’t mean perfect.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/26 12:25 AM
7

OP literally asked why things weren’t perfect if women had agency. So I was answering OP.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/26 12:23 AM
5

I never said it as an “excuse” for anything, since there is nothing to excuse. OP asked “why” and I was speaking to that. The victim is not at fault for being a victim. And many times they are financially abused or their children are threatened and they are still unable to leave, or they are scared, etc, in fact the most dangerous time for a victim is when she tries to leave, that is when men murder. It can be quite hard to escape. Abusers are always at fault for committing the abuse, not the vi…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 09:13 PM
4

Yes, that is true, like I said it’s improved from before, but not gone.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 09:09 PM
18

When women can leave men easier, violence rates go down: https://www.nber.org/digest/mar04/divorce-laws-and-family-violence?page=1&perPage=50 https://users.nber.org/~jwolfers/papers/bargaining_in_the_shadow_of_the_law.pdf https://www.novolawyers.com/insights/no-fault-divorce-what-it-is-and-why-it-matters#:~:text=No%20fault%20divorce%20is%20really,States%20are%20initiated%20by%20women. Domestic Violence Decrease: Studies from the National Bureau of Economic Research show that states passing no-fa…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 07:27 PM
18

That’s because the responsibility of committing abuse is always on the abuser. Them being a victim too would mean they are not responsible for being abused themselves, but doesn’t change the responsibility for abusing someone else. Just like committing a crime is still always the criminal’s responsibility, even if one was once the victim of crime themselves. It’s two separate events.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 07:15 PM
49

Many women who get with abusive men were abused as children. Same with men who get with abusive women. Narcissists somehow always manage to find people to pick on, often starting on them young or picking people already used to abuse. It’s not the fault of the victim. If you haven’t been abused or had a narcissist target you, it often seems insane anyone would put up with that, and hard to understand why they don’t leave. Yet it’s very common for victims to not leave, to think they deserve it, to…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 05:10 PM
2

Maybe you just are more likely to do things with men who are more like you? And since you don’t expect women to be like you, you don’t have the same filters for them. Also I think men just tend to not be as emotional with each other. So they may be more likely to express this emotionality more to women in their lives, rather than to you as another man. I’ve had the experience of telling a male friend about being worried for one of our mutual male friends due to some of the intense emotions he wa…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 10:03 PM
16

Men do this commonly too. You might just be a more literal thinker than average, but if you haven’t had very emotional relationships with men and only with women, you won’t notice most men are also likely to assume a bunch of things based on their feelings. Men love to say they are more logical, but in reality most people of any gender are not that logical, and there are outliers who are. Frequently men don’t think jealousy and anger are “feelings” and think crying means someone isn’t logical, f…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 06:47 PM
2

I have never seen that myself. Hell, I was once in my 30s with a man in his 40s and no one has ever said a single thing. Certainly no woman his age has ever given me “flak” in all that time lol. I became friends with the women his age actually! Come on, no one cares about what age a 30 year old dates lmao. What is the “power” you think I have, or that I guess I lost because my husband is older? Is it good for anything? Last guy in here I asked that said I have the “power” to get men to dance lik…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 04:46 AM
–

Damn, I thought women were “dressing for men” and “wearing makeup to attract men”, which sounds like effort to me. Have you ever worn high heels? It’s hard and painful. How about bras, ever worn those? Women put a lot of effort into looking pretty, which is what men like. Men put effort in that women like, women put effort in that men like.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 01:46 AM
1

I still don’t understand what the “power” is. Literally anyone can look up videos of people dancing if they find that amusing, which it really isn’t to me, so doesn’t seem like a useful power really. You said women have all the power in a relationship. I’m in a relationship, but I am not understanding what this “power” I have actually is or how to use it. Just asking my partner to dance? Doesn’t seem that powerful to me. Hell men even have strip clubs they can go see women dance for their amusem…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 09:37 PM
1

“Power” to do what? I don’t understand. How do I use this power?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 06:13 PM
9

I’m an older woman who is not attracted to men 20 years older than me, who was once a young woman not attracted to men 20 years older than me. My reasons for it haven’t changed. It’s not because I want to deny that I am becoming less attractive as I age. Men ALSO become less attractive as they age. So that’s why I wasn’t attracted to older men when young and still am not now, and that’s why I doubt many young women are attracted to old men. I have zero desire to date men my age who enjoy dating …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 05:14 PM
4

Even non violent men rape. It’s very prevalent. Other men often don’t believe their friend who is a rapist would do such a thing. Women tell people about their experience and often no one else believes her. I was drugged once by a guy a male friend brought over, I lost 2 friends that day as they didn’t believe me, despite me having zero reason to make such a thing up. One of those friends was a girl whose first bf raped her! No one wants to think a man they know is a rapist. It’s sadly NOT that …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 02:27 AM
2

It doesn’t matter if most men are that though. That’s irrelevant. Enough men are like this for it to be a legit worry and something many of us have encountered. I have multiple friends who were having sex with men and then he raped her anally during it, once he’s got her vulnerable under him. Just that one kind of rape! I have friends and family who have been raped in other ways, too, it’s very common for women to experience rape. So yeah, most men aren’t this, but if 25% of women have been assa…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 02:03 AM
-2

Most men don’t need to be rapists for this to be something we’ve all heard from friends who have experienced it, and therefore have to worry about it. It is not uncommon, sadly. Men don’t hear about that from their friends and don’t have to worry it will happen to them. Don’t you pick out a nice outfit for dates? It’s easier to do as a man.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 01:23 AM
-4

Humans usually have a very strong desire for a mate, most consider it worth a lot of cons and trouble to try to get one. Also the pro of having biological kids without having to give birth is quite a large pro, again many men have strong desires to reproduce so would consider “having to approach” well worth the result. You also missed some pros: Generally men don’t have to worry women will anally rape them if they decide to have sex. Since men tend to do the asking and approaching, they get to c…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 12:47 AM
4

What is the actual advice tips each are giving? How experienced are they at giving financial advice, like how many years have they been doing it? What is the outcome of previous people they have advised, what is the success:failure ratio? I have to say, I don’t know the childhood history of my financial advisor at all, and I never considered asking that tbh. The experience and success rate of the advice is way more important information for me, I don’t really care about the details of how you ar…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 05:56 PM
–

I’m not a masculine woman just because I am egalitarian lol. And it’s not just friends, like one of my employees (with my side business) paid for the house, women I work with in tech frequently earn more than their husbands and pay for the wedding or honeymoon because they have more money to do so, most of my family members have egalitarian relationships. And even my male friends all have wives who work and pay for half or more, they aren’t feminine because they are egalitarian. Being egalitaria…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 08:37 PM
–

Well that’s why I live in a liberal state. I have noticed feminists in conservative areas are way more conservative than they are here, feminist doesn’t necessarily mean leftist or egalitarian I suppose.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 08:24 PM
–

Move to a liberal city. It’s totally normal here for both people to contribute to the wedding or honeymoon and pay for dates. Encourage egalitarianism and leftist policies if you want more of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 04:30 PM
–

Most of the women I know pay for half of things or pay for more than their husband does. Maybe just the area I’m in, but it’s far from rare.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 04:07 AM
–

Yes I pay for our house, and offered to buy my husband a ring (he didn’t want one, he didn’t get me one either), I paid for half the dates, and I paid for our honeymoon. I have friends and acquaintances who have done the same, it’s not that rare to find. The majority of couples are dual income and both contribute to the mortgage and pay for things.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 04:04 AM
1

I clicked the link but it just goes to your main post, which talks about averages. Averaging with people making nothing and people making billions skews it from what most people make in this country. If a woman isn’t working then you have to look at the reduced costs of childcare expenses, she is literally saving the family that much money so it should be counted, right? Childcare costs $30k/yr per child in my location. Many times families save up so one person can stay home for 1-2 years and th…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 02:48 PM
1

Using an average and including people unemployed makes no sense. And the millionaires are going to skew the average also. Especially since there are millionaire men with wives who don’t work, but that scenario is not remotely the average man and woman’s life. Averages are not great for this kind of math at all, if you want to talk about normal people, you have to throw out the crazy edges that skew things so far from the real norm.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 02:27 PM
0

I mean, I had the same thing happen with skills I wanted to learn when I was a young woman, like I tried to join a sport, I tried to do a dance class, I tried to flirt with men, and I was teased. Some things I was teased about, but was so determined I just powered through it. Some I felt stupid and gave up when really I was just a beginner and might have been able to get better. And I developed a preference for solo hobbies due to this phenomenon. It’s a problem with our culture I suppose, and a…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 05:41 AM
2

Men using their strength to get what they want from women and weaker men has also been a known strategy since the dawn of time. So young strong men have even more of this kind of power than young women, since its power over men and women both.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 08:40 PM
1

Where exactly do you find these “chumps”? This power is useless. I’ve been a young woman and the only thing it got me was that I could have sex. That’s not a power that gets anything, and young hot men can also get sex easily. Men aren’t paying a woman’s rent just because she is a “young woman”. If you mean she can sell sex for money - that is just called work. Young men have this same “power” of being able to do work other people can’t, like he can use his strength to get a job that requires he…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 08:37 PM
2

Right, but my point was you can’t actually know to avoid it if you don’t even know it’s something that would happen. It’s the same for dating, autistic women wouldn’t know they might get assaulted by dating, so wouldn’t know to avoid it. They aren’t expecting friends, loved ones, partners, etc to actually want to hurt them. It’s actually shocking learning men want to assault you, when you thought men liked women and wanted to love them.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 04:20 PM
3

How can we be just as safe? I was assaulted by someone a friend brought to my apartment, I never once considered a friend would do that so wouldn’t even know of the option “don’t have friends” until it happened. The point is autistic people don’t read people as well and so don’t see the bad intentions. We could be hermits I guess, but until multiple assaults happen that probably wouldn’t even be considered as it’s just not expected or even considered that people will want to be assaulting you.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 03:21 PM
2

It isn't. There are quota hiring and women representations in jobs is an important statisitc nowadays. While you are legally allowed to select the best candidate for the job, if all the best candidates in your firma are men, you are viable for a lawsuit. What country are you talking about? It is illegal in the US to have sex based hiring quotas. And it is absolutely common for a place to have no men or mostly men. I have worked at many places where I got hired and was the only woman there, or wa…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 03:00 PM
–

Completely false in my experience. I can’t trust a hookup enough for things that could result in pain if done wrong. Hell no. Damn I didn’t even want oral with hookups much less something like anal. Also if I bring up some kink and they don’t like it they may be mean to me or tell friends or some shit, can’t trust them yet. But with my husband I trust him fully and know also he is okay with kinks and so he isn’t gonna hurt me, take advantage of me, make fun of me, tell anyone, etc. Hookups were …
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 01:38 AM
2

It’s already a crime to lie and report a crime that didn’t happen to police. And it already requires the burden of proof and all that. I was curious about OPs “automatic felony” idea. Presently no one gets any “automatic” sentences.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/26 04:02 AM
3

It’s already a crime to lie and report a crime that didn’t happen to police. And it already requires the burden of proof and all that. I was curious about OPs “automatic felony” idea. Presently no one gets any “automatic” sentences.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/26 04:02 AM
4

So here you are saying it’s “literally impossible” to have an egalitarian partnership, but I disagree, since I’ve been in one for 20 years. We have areas of expertise we obviously prefer the one more knowledgeable to make decisions in their area. That doesn’t make it not egalitarian, which does not mean every single choice any person makes has to be decided between both lol. It means neither person is the “ultimate boss” and each one is equal in status in the relationship. We split things up so …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/26 02:08 AM
4

Well that is already the case that if you lie to police about a crime that didn’t happen, it’s a crime, if it is proven in court you go to jail. So seems like you have what you want already? It’s just not “an automatic felony” because that’s not how crime convictions work in US. You have to have things proven in court, nothing is “automatic”. If you don’t value someone being a homemaker, why would you even have that in your relationship then? If you don’t value it much, just don’t set up a relat…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 11:59 PM
10

How would you prove someone is “lying about rape”? Do you mean if a man is tried in court, and found not guilty, the woman should be charged? Do you think this about other crimes too, like if someone is found not guilty of burglary, the person who was allegedly stole from should be automatically charged with a crime? It’s already a crime if someone lies to police they can charge them, and they have absolutely used that to charge women who lie about rape. Not sure why we would need additional law…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 07:38 PM
–

He told me in comments.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 05:20 PM
–

Yep, they can do that. I was actually wrong about him buying sex in this case though. This guy is actually in a religious group that encourages marrying off teenagers to old men. So she probably can’t even leave after she gets older and smarter, and it might be a reward by the religious leader or other weird thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 04:23 PM
–

Sorry I missed that it’s your fiancée. That’s even more disturbing, I guess you aren’t paying for sex at all, sounds like you actually just bought a whole human and have a religious group backing the buying and selling of women, or giving young women out to old men as “rewards” by the leadership. I’m guessing that means she won’t be able to leave you either 🙁
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 04:19 PM
2

So you pay for sex and tell people you have a “girlfriend”?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 06:24 AM
2

I don’t really care what gender someone is. I have friends of both genders. I don’t see my male friendships as less valuable than the female ones, how close I am usually depends more on the person, some of my closest friends are men. Most of my friends are married and I am too, so none of us are trying to date each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/26 04:21 PM
7

That’s ridiculous, not all autistic people can mask and not all behaviors can be masked. And there are different levels of support needs, some cannot live in depends and need caretakers. Autistic people very often can’t even stay employed, it shouldn’t be shocking they would struggle with dating, and it’s not at all their fault - there is no cure, and the brain is literally developed different. Also even when people can do it, masking can only be done for so long, usually spent at work - at home…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 09:16 PM
19

How is it your fault if you are autistic? I think it’s an inherited developmental disability.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 07:02 PM
10

I’m in an egalitarian relationship of 20 years and I assure you I am attracted to him. Not sure why you would say “never”, you don’t seem to know much about women like tbh. Most people in my area are in egalitarian relationships, they aren’t inherently more “fragile”, my area doesn’t have a higher divorce rate it’s actually less. Your example of something better seemed to be of a truly fragile “relationship” since you said the man didn’t even like the woman and was considering her a “placeholder…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 09:11 AM
12

You mention egalitarian relationships in the title, and then never say anything about it at all. No idea what relation “betabux” has to egalitarianism. And your “real life example” is not egalitarian or a successful non-egalitarian relationship - it’s just of a guy who sounds like an asshole with no relationship with a woman he doesn’t even like and sees as a “placeholder” and an overall terrible sounding scenario for both people. You don’t ever explain what this example has to do with anything.…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 06:45 AM
2

I mean, why not? If you don’t like women, sure don’t, whatever. But most men don’t have a reason to avoid interactions with women. It’s not like they are that scared of us. Most men ALSO fear men, and understand why women would, so it’s not a problem knowing women fear men, they think it’s normal. My man would be upset if I just ran around NOT fearing for my safety, tbh, he probably has more fear about it than me. He bought me tasers to carry and bought guns and taught me to shoot. It wasn’t bec…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 01:55 AM
4

the backup option of sleeping your way into success Why do men always think this is an option all women have? I have literally never been graced with this option or had any kind of opportunity that was possible. Can you give me instructions on how to actually take this option? However, I’ve never seen on this sub any woman disagree that the backup option exists. I am here, saying I don’t think it exists. I’ve only seen women try to claim that men could theoretically access this option if they ch…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 01:09 AM
2

Yeah, when I started making enough to support both of us I told him he could quit his job and do home improvement projects and house chores, as his job was exhausting him all the time and the small amount of money didn’t seem worth his suffering. He wasn’t comfortable not contributing any income at all though, so went part time to have at least some income. That was working good for a while. Eventually we decided to buy a business though when an opportunity arose, so he quit that job and runs ou…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/26 08:15 PM
–

How would this benefit women though? Like how would I benefit if instead of working in big tech and running my own business, I just did household chores?? Doesn’t seem like a good use of my skills. This would help both gender as it would help women get a good man to themself and they wouldn't need to fear about getting cheated on or used as a practice girlfriend. You think men only cheat on women who work? Huh? I personally don’t fear my man cheating at all tbh, I know him too well and we are to…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/26 09:11 AM
3

That's what I'm saying, women can marry someone without loving or ever wishing to fuck them. That’s not the norm, though. Especially not liberal women who don’t feel the conservative pressure to marry as soon as possible. It's more about women doing nice things for herself but refusing to put in a modicum effort for her husband even when they are willing to go to much greater lengths for her. I don’t think being unwilling to put in even half the effort to daily tasks is going much greater length…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 08:38 PM
9

Women are women everywhere. There will be little to no sex unless she's ovulating Lol what? All the women who have been on birth control at all times except when trying to make a baby have no sex? You REALLY only have sex to make a baby and never any other time? This is not an “all woman” thing, I assure you, she probably just doesn’t actually like sex with you. no unpaid physical/emotional labor without her keeping score( even if it was just a little bit of extra effort on her part, such as coo…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 08:06 PM
4

I was drugged and attacked in my own apartment. Out of all the women I know who were raped, none happened when they were blacked out or walking alone at night. It was usually by their boyfriends who they loved! Only one who had it happen by a stranger while walking alone was 11 and she was snatched in broad daylight off the street.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 03:23 PM
5

It’s not just one guy though, far from it. Since I was 11 I have had men target me with intent for harm. Many, many men want to use their dicks as a weapon. And it can feel like growing boobs drew a target on my back and men stalk and follow with intent to harm, with intent to use their dick as a weapon against me. We grow up and not only experience it ourselves but hear stories from our friends. Here is a few examples I heard before I was even an adult: one friend was raped by her father since …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 03:08 PM
47

I do feel sympathy for them. But a lot of the complaining just doesn’t seem like it is a huge issue they act like it is. Like I’ve had men drug me, try to rape me, stalk me, sneak the condom off to try to knock me up, serious scary shit. Then men complain they paid for a date and didn’t get laid, or were rejected by a friend, and why aren’t I more sympathetic? It’s like… I have also not gotten laid by men I wanted to have sex with, and been rejected by friends I liked, those are normal problems …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 03:13 AM
1

Yes, all the men I have dated watched porn and many had some strange kink they were into. I don’t care how a man wants to masturbate. It’s his private time. One guy asked me if I would suck his dick while he was shitting on the toilet! No, that’s disgusting, I asked where on earth he got that idea, he said he saw it in a porn. He kept it to his own fantasies and didn’t ask again and that was fine by me, most likely he kept watching his weird porn. Porn is worse than books, this means some real g…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 12:16 AM
2

It’s not “anything I don’t agree with”. It’s what has been documented as a sign of abuse. I assure you I didn’t make those domestic violence pages! They weren’t written because I feel that way lmao.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 03:30 AM
12

Yeah I have no idea how much casual sex any of our male friends have. I asked my husband and he has no idea either. He’s also positive they don’t know anything about how much he has had or not either. So not sure who it’s “showing value” to exactly. I think OP might be in a friend group where they talk/brag about this a lot and it’s highly important to their social status among each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 07:34 PM
–

My man was 30 and was a virgin and it didn’t matter to me. 1 partner would have been fine too, yeah.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 07:32 PM
1

Nope, look at any resource on abuse like I listed above and it clearly states that is controlling behavior. I gave a direct quote, it wasn’t ambiguous or conditional. It’s a very clear sign of controlling behavior and often one of the first red flags that things will escalate to more abuse. Boundaries are about YOURSELF. You can have a boundary you don’t date people who wear certain things. But then asking women out who like to wear those things and insisting she CHANGE is not a boundary at all,…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 07:26 PM
0

Why would the focus be on casual sex then? I assure you it is WAY easier to have sex with a girlfriend than with a stranger. People in relationships have sex more often than single people. Anyway I’m sorry men seem to only value you based on sex and so you are attributing your own value to that metric, that sounds hard. I do think there are better men out there, maybe you could find a different crowd?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 04:43 PM
2

Are you ok in the head? Why would a woman wear above the knee tight skirt that shows her ass when seeking partner, and then after finding one, continue to wear these same clothes, especially if the guy isn't okay with it? Presumably because she likes the outfit. Why on earth would the guy ask her out if he wasn’t okay with her clothes? Essentially these clothes are made to make her look attractive, of which it is a statement to stop wearing these same clothes after being loyal to a man. Why woul…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 03:33 PM
3

Let’s say that same obese woman spots a limited production fat dress that she prefers wearing. Fine, that’s a validated preference. The dress may be hard to find. And slim girls probably subsidize that size or she has to pay a niche brand markup, but it’s possible. Evidence exists. The funny thing is this example is actually the opposite of reality that I have seen. Obese women often have more clothes options than slim women. The thin models you see in ads? They pin the dresses in back to make t…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 05:18 AM
4

Or to use another common example of dressing or acting like she’s single when she’s supposed to be in a relationship with us. HUH? What does this mean? Do you actually change your wardrobe when you get in a relationship? So like you get rid of all your clothes so as to not “dress like you are single” as soon as you become serious with a woman? Do you change to outfits that make you better or worse? And you are unhappy if the woman doesn’t also throw out her wardrobe and buy a whole new one? Is t…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 04:47 AM
9

But that’s not gender specific. The worst women we know also seem to be able to easily attract the hottest guys, having multiple men proposing marriage to them, it seeming totally obvious to us that she is full of red flags and yet men seem to love it and then all have the same bad experiences down the line.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/26 03:16 PM
2

The foundation of reproductive autonomy is that consent to sex is not consent to pregnancy. Your interpretation is completely false. You are misunderstanding the foundation of reproductive autonomy. The word “pregnancy” was a hint… The foundation is BODILY autonomy. Even a dead person has it - they can choose not to be an organ donor when they are alive, and despite dying and having no use for their organs, we allow them to rot rather than have that dead person lose autonomy over their body. Pre…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/26 04:41 AM
19

That’s not how it works. You could say “it’s legal in California” and be correct. But “it’s legal in USA” is incorrect, because it is also illegal in USA, it depends on the state, not the country. It’s like if I said “the USA is a tropical country” just because Hawaii is in the tropics - something being true in one place inside a larger place doesn’t necessarily make it true for the larger place.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/26 04:20 AM
28

No it’s not in all of it, only some places. Have you been living under a rock?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/26 03:32 AM
3

Yes I always suggested going dutch. But men always declined and insisted on paying. Sometimes they allowed me to pay for a second part of the date, like we go for ice cream after. And then for a second date I usually offered to pay if they paid the previous time, and more often men did agree to that. Then we switched back and forth if we continued dating. When my husband and I were dating, we not only alternated paying, we alternated who drove to the other’s place, and alternated who cooked dinn…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/26 11:33 PM
7

I don’t like them myself, but my friend has a big booty and loves them. She has explained to me that with normal panties, there is a ton of fabric wedged in her cheeks, but with a thong, it’s made to fit there so it’s much less fabric and is more comfortable. Panties come in all sorts of cuts, and women come in different shapes. So different women with different hip and butt shapes prefer different cuts! And for me, the point of underwear is NOT to cover my butt (pants already cover it even more…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/26 03:30 AM
0

I guess I never saw any tv about the orgasm gap! And no, I did NOT know some lubes would burn the shit out of me, or that some men’s dicks would cause yeast infections or UTIs And yes, things have to be learned - exactly! That’s my fucking point! That is why I had casual sex multiple times before I LEARNED that it was not really worth it. All the potential side effects were not remotely worth it when I wasn’t even getting an orgasm. I needed experience to learn - just like men do.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/26 03:21 AM
1

Who knows, I wasn’t given an opportunity to try. But most men never even touched my clit, I have never slept with a man and not even touched his dick. I wasn’t expecting porn performance by any means, I was expecting some sexual stimulation though. No one did any preaching to me about this. TV made casual sex look fun for both people. I did not know about orgasm gaps, or UTIs, or yeast passed from male genitals, or sensitivities to lube, all problems I had to experience to learn.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/26 11:41 PM
-3

I honestly did NOT know that men would be likely to be so selfish in bed when I was 18 and first trying casual sex. I thought it would be fun for me, because sex is fun when it’s two people who want to have fun. Until I did it a few times I truly had no idea how bad men were in bed, nor did I assume most men would be that way. No one warned me about it, are you thinking all mothers warn daughters that all men are bad in bed?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/26 10:45 PM
1

I like a guy who is not like what guys like, like body builder muscles - but is fit and strong. So some muscle, especially if I can see some in the arms, but not that muscle neck gym bros tend to have. Average men are overweight in US and I prefer more in shape.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/26 07:38 AM
1

Maybe. I don’t think I am tall enough to feel that way about it. I am happy with my height. I care more about the face than either of those in all honesty. But I guess if I had to choose just those two I prefer being fit and in shape than tall. I am not really into overweight men, but I like guys who aren’t small, so for a guy who is shorter I would probably want to be more buff, but a tall guy could get away with being skinnier.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/26 06:46 AM
1

Ah I see, yeah actually maybe if they are really tall so don’t have many choices they are more likely to get with shorter guys - I do know multiple 6ft women and they are with shorter than average men. I am 5’9” though and there is lots of men taller than that in my area, I’ve only been asked out by a man shorter than me once (I did say yes). But it still can mean they care about it a similar amount as other women, like yeah I prefer a guy taller than me, but it’s far from a deal breaker, I have…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/26 05:51 AM
5

I think they care about height as much as any other girls, so some do and some don’t, and on average probably prefer men taller than them.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/26 04:04 AM
7

You are very unusual indeed if you find women with acne just as attractive as ones without, say. And if you whip out a tape measure before you know if you are attracted or not. Most men are more attracted to women with curves in the right places and clear skin. Not having those things doesn’t make one deformed or diseased. It’s quite average to not have an hour glass shape and to have acne scars, for example. Yet most men will find someone with an hour glass shape and no scars to be more attract…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/26 12:45 AM
25

Wow, you are automatically attracted to all women with that height and weight??? So like even the ugliest ones with really bad skin or asymmetrical faces and the prettiest ones that are models, you are just as attracted to all of them? Sounds like you are actually attracted to numbers and not actual women? Most humans find face symmetry more attractive than a number on a tape measure, you are quite unusual. This is not a gender difference, this is about you personally being an extreme outlier.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/26 12:35 AM
15

Sounds like you are just comparing height and weight? I am 5” above average, so I suppose male equivalent would be 6’2”. My BMI is 20. For someone that height it’s apparently 160, which seems pretty low to me, I don’t understand that. Visually a man that tall probably has to weigh 190-210 to look more like my build I would think… Some men that height and weight I am attracted to, and some I am not. This is not nearly enough info lmao. There is a wide range between ugly to beautiful that could ha…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/26 12:32 AM
8

But you are divorced with kids, why wouldn’t you want to date women divorced with kids instead of forever single women and then saying that’s why you need to date younger? Especially since you find kids so fulfulling and think people without kids are miserable, wouldn’t you automatically look for women who have kids then? Men who have never married are not any happier than women who haven’t. It’s a lonely world out there. I think it’s rare for divorced women to “have all her needs met” by an ex …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 06:06 AM
11

Most of the divorced women I know are doing a lot better than the divorced men. A lot of times they were just saddled with extra work by being married, now they get custody 50/50 and that means they have 50% more time, plus only have to clean up after kids and not an man-child on top of it. They pick better men now than when they were younger so they have better sex lives. The men are looking for step mothers to offload their childcare to and having a hard time finding women signing up for that.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 04:47 AM
2

Nah, it doesn’t matter how attracted I am to you, if you have political beliefs that I shouldn’t have equal rights to men, that law abiding people should be deported because of their skin color, and that it’s acceptable to elect a convicted criminal who tried to overthrow the government as a president, we just aren’t gonna be compatible. I absolutely need someone with the same values as me or I won’t be able to merge my life with them!! And if we don’t have anything in common - what are we gonna…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 04:27 AM
4

I don’t know that he’s extra attractive, but he is taller than average and he used to be in good shape (he’s gotten chubby now). He is charismatic and manipulative which can help with getting what he wants.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/26 10:50 PM
7

My brother hasn’t been single since he was 16 I think. He always has a relationship, but there is usually a lot of drama in them. He is married to his second wife now, someone he was dating even when married to the first wife.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/26 07:50 PM
1

But that is just false, it’s not a requirement to have a marriage in order to sue someone for custody or child support. Disputes with your partner are just as possible even if you weren’t married. And even if you were married the government is only going to get involved if you have a dispute. Why would you assume there will be no disputes with your partner if you don’t marry them?? If you have a custody dispute and sue someone or the sue you, you go to court - regardless of your marital status, …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/26 04:15 AM
1

That sounds frustrating. Are these women you meet in real life and they think the reason is obvious? Do you think it’s about how you look or a demeanor issue? Do you have any male friends you could ask? If you have an attribute that women assume is obvious to you that is undesirable, but that you didn’t know was so, probably men would be willing to tell you what it is. Are these women you meet on Reddit? Perhaps it’s things you said to them that they found unattractive, more unattractive than be…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 11:50 PM
1

So why would you think I know the mind of some random woman I haven’t ever spoke to any more than you? You think all women share the same thoughts or something? Do you know the thoughts of all the men in the world?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 08:16 PM
1

I would need to know you to make any judgements on your “league”. And I would need to be able to read the mind of whoever said something to you to speak to why they said it or what they meant by it.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 08:14 PM
1

Like I said, perhaps she was referring to another attribute of yours. Clothing and fitness are not the only thing affecting attraction! (I know some ugly people who dress nice and are fit, I also know some people who are pretty but I am not attracted to them for reasons like their demeanor, a lot of things can go into attraction.) And also - I have NO CLUE what someone else was thinking when they spoke to you. You’d have to ask THEM why they said something - why would I have any idea why someone…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 08:10 PM
1

It was clearly just an example, obviously I don’t know you so my example was made up. You’d have to give me way more information if you wanted me to somehow know why someone else told you something! Why do you think I would know anything about that???
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 08:08 PM
1

One of the reasons you gave that marriage meant you didn’t love your partner, was that then the government would be involved in child custody. But that’s completely false, they can get involved without marriage and not be involved with it, so it’s just a false statement. Me pointing out the evidence you made up for your point is false, is in fact relevant to the point.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 08:06 PM
2

It requires one person to sue whether you are married or not. So sure, it requires the consent of one person to sue the other. Does not require your consent if the other parent sues you. And whether you were previously married to that person has nothing to do with it, it’s the same either way. You cannot protect yourself from lawsuits by not getting married lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 04:15 PM
1

You haven't heard about marriage vows? The words 'till death do us part' don't ring a bell? Some people choose to say vows, and some choose to say those words. There is no “contract signed” with that though, at least I haven’t seen one. People could say those vows with or without marriage, that’s a personal choice you make to speak it. We didn’t speak anything like that. But what contract are you referring to that has that and that you think I signed??? It does if you don't get in a relationship…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 10:37 AM
3

If two people genuinely love each other, why would they feel the need to sign a contract about it vowing to love each other until death? I didn’t sign a contract that says anything about vowing to love each other until death. What contract are you referring to? It's absurd. The divorce rate is also evidence of marriage being a substitute for love. What logic goes from point A to point B here? The idea of marriage is also pretty dumb because why would you sign a contract that essentially involves…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 09:43 AM
4

How so? A young beautiful woman does not have a league of old bald men, and saying that obvious fact doesn’t mean she doesn’t have a league at all….
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 05:58 AM
3

I have no idea, I know nothing about you or conversations you have had with other people. Perhaps you have some other attribute someone was referring to, as an example if you are 60 and trying to get with an overweight 20 year old, she may say you are not attractive enough for her and be accurate in that she is not in the same league, even if you are fit and she is not. Being fit or fat are not the only qualities a person has.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 05:56 AM
2

No, it means there is inequality in the dating market that makes things easier for women and harder for men. The market is what defines what is equal. You are judging two people who are equal on the market as being not equal because you find old bald men hotter than beautiful young women. The average person does not think that, and the market does not reflect that. That’s purely your personal taste. Because men aren't looking for mail order brides because it's socially taboo. If they did, women …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 05:50 AM
2

This would depend on your personality and interests! My husband and I met in a movie making group, for example. If you have no interest in that, then that makes no sense, but if you do, then yeah. It means go meet people who have similar interests. The more people you meet, the more opportunities you have to meet someone to date. Even if they aren’t in the group, friends you make will invite you to events they host or things they do, and you will meet more people then. Social networks expand exp…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 01:44 AM
18

He doesn’t even think it should be a looks match - he claimed a 40 year old fat bald man is equivalent to a beautiful 30 year old woman lmao
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 01:36 AM
6

Almost all women in the developed world are dating men out of their league Huh? That just means you aren’t judging league accurately. Your league is what you can get on average. So if all women are getting it, that’s literally what dating in your league is. In the developed world, women don't realize how much power they have over men Power to do what? and that the 100 millionth most attractive man in never dating the 100 millionth most attractive women if you were to ask them to rank each other …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 01:34 AM
17

My husband is 8 years older than me and I was 23 when we started dating. I would have rejected him for his age as it was a method I used to filter out guys on a dating app. We were friends for a few years and then grew closer, and his age didn’t really matter to me anymore when he asked me out. Like I didn’t need a filter if I already know the guy. Dating sites had a lot of men and needed some method of narrowing it down.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/26 03:12 AM
–

You didn’t really change any meaning here. You still describe how you see sex as transactional: after sometime I’ll be wondering how I ended up in this situation taking care of someone else and I don’t even get sex. So you have an expectation that you should pay bills and “provide 24/7 around the clock” for someone and then get sex in return. Normal people don’t expect to be paying someone else’s bills at all, not that they would pay someone’s bills and then get sex for it. I think you should on…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/26 10:51 PM
6

Hardly any 18 year old women want kids, they want to do it in their 30s. More women want kids at 30 than 18, I assure you.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/26 05:18 AM
4

And so do some women! My point was if you expect women to have their shit together by 18, the least you should do is have it together by 21. I don’t know many women ready to have kids or where that would at all be a good idea. Many haven’t even graduated high school yet! If you don’t have it together until you’re 35, there is nothing wrong with dating women in their 30s, like most men who are that age do.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/26 05:13 AM
7

If that is what you want so bad, why did you wait until you were 35?? My mother and my grandmother and my great grandmother all had kids after 30, so I don’t understand your idea that women are only fertile between 18-25. But if you did feel that way, you probably should have made it a top priority to find a partner and become a dad when you were 18-28. (Most relationships have a 0-3 year age difference.) Also I don’t think it’s true at all the majority of women 18-24 want to become mothers lol.…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/26 03:36 AM
21

I mean it was just an example of how a narrower amount of options could result in better options. A lot of people meet their spouse in school. Dating someone you meet online doesn’t make them more likely to move with you after you finish school, so I don’t know what that has to do with anything. And obviously if you move you could date people where you move to?? It was just an example of a situation where less options could improve chances. It wasn’t advice to stalk students in another town you …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/26 07:52 AM
4

It was just an example of how narrowing down the options could help. Obviously not all people go to college, this example wasn’t suggesting I think 100% of women do and they should all only date men who do, and everyone else is not allowed to date, lmao. I’m saying if a woman does go to school, she could date men she meets there rather than online and it would probably be more likely to be a compatible match.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/26 07:42 AM
45

I think it can, depending on how you filtered down to get less suitors. For example, I think only dating men you go to college with, and not online or bars, would narrow it down to at least men who are pursuing schooling and similar age, which could be higher quality than the population at large.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/26 12:24 AM
1

What exactly happens with marriage that you think would change something so much? Before my husband and I married, we owned a house together, we owned cars together, we owned pets together, we shared a bank account, our schedule was all tied together as we commuted to work together, we hung out with our friends together. After we married, that all stayed just as entwined, the only noticeable change was our health insurance cost went down, we got a tax break, and I was allowed to fund a spousal I…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/26 02:32 AM
1

Nah, I’ve never liked it. I’m always “ok” with it if the guy accepts my no, no matter what he looks like. But I have never liked it, it’s just not my kind of thing. I don’t like being approached by strangers for any reason, it is always just uncomfortable for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/02/26 10:13 AM
1

Yea I have a curvy body shape that a lot of men are into.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/26 02:09 AM
2

Huh? Like I said what else would a stranger know about me??
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 04:06 PM
3

What else would a stranger know about me? But in honesty there’s a lot of men who just need to know your female and they be ready. I’ve had guys hit on me when bundled up in winter coat and hat and scarf. I have two female employees who talk to customers a lot and we have had to ban some customers due to harassment and weird infatuation - and those guys didn’t even know what the women looked like! The male employee has never had a single problem like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 10:36 AM
18

I don’t like being approached by strangers. If it’s respectful it’s not a “problem” but doesn’t mean I have to like it.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/26 11:27 PM
–

Yes I think you are absolutely correct. I didn’t have success with online dating but met my husband organically.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/26 11:17 PM
–

Yes, guys would lie a lot chatting online in an attempt to get sex! Meeting a guy at school unplanned they didn’t tend to do that. Also a lot of guys didn’t date online at all at that time, so these selection was maybe limited, like my current husband has never been on a dating site.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/26 04:07 PM
–

Nah, common interests have typically been my priority. And online dating was a bit different back then, pics would sometimes be exchanged only after talking even! The nutty guy was not more attractive than the others. Not sure why some guys here have this idea that hot guys are bad and ugly guys are good, I have never experienced any such pattern.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/26 04:04 PM
–

That was over a span of like 8 years, and going on a lot of online dates. And really only ONE was totally insane, the rest just weren’t my preference. Like I have actually met multiple women who had men tell them they were married on a date, and they still chose to keep dating them! So it’s not a deal breaker for everyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/26 11:28 AM
–

This was in Seattle ~20 years ago. Online dating. Never had any dates like that when I dated men I met organically!
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/26 11:25 AM
–

I did leave! Most insane date ever. I think it might have been some PUA tactic? (Those “pickup artists” giving crazy advice to men were starting to get popular then, I met multiple guys doing things like “negging” or being weirdly sexually forward).
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/26 11:25 AM
28

I found you can filter out a LOT of issues on date 1. For example, I have been on many dates where they were rude to the waitress, that is an immediate disqualifier for me. Other fun examples I have: telling me they are married asking if I would suck their dick under the table talking about their “crazy ex” and mentioning she has a restraining order against him trying to order dinner for me, especially fun as he wanted to order me meat and I’m a lifelong veg having no interest in what I am sayin…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/26 03:10 AM
5

If sex is important then you should find someone who also values it the same way and desires a similar frequency. It’s a compatibility thing. Each relationship can have its own expectations. I don’t view sex as transactional but if there’s no sex why is there an expectation of me fully providing everything? Uh, the second half of your sentence contradicts the first half. Having an expectation of “providing everything” in exchange for having sex is the definition of “viewing sex as transactional”…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/26 05:36 AM
1

Different things. A couple just didn’t seem to know a clit existed and wouldn’t give it any attention. One would finish right away and go to sleep without me having any chance of finishing. Another had a problem getting hard but refused to speak to me about it, and all he wanted to do was to receive oral from me and no other activities. One guy had too many gross requests.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/26 05:12 AM
6

There’s men I wanted very badly, but who were just terrible in bed, so I had to choose not to be with them anymore as a good sex life is important to me. I have been with a few guys I tried to help them get better but it didn’t work. Some people just aren’t compatible with me, even if I wanted them to be.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/26 10:29 AM
1

I have never been catcalled by a someone I am interested in though. It’s such a turnoff and because it’s often aggressive, I immediately am just in fear. Them sharing a gender with other people I am into doesn’t really change anything.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 02:12 AM
3

A blind person can experience all physical characteristics. There is not some bodies we can see but that isn’t physically there and therefore not detectable by touch as well…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 02:09 AM
2

Beards. A nice firm, hairy chest. Big hairy forearms. Deep manly voice. Wide shoulders.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/26 04:02 AM
2

The phrase is actually “consent to sex isn’t consent to pregnancy” - it’s not about parenthood, but bodily autonomy. I don’t believe this right should be for women only. Men ALSO don’t consent to having a fetus growing in them just because they had sex, and should be allowed to remove it. I certainly don’t believe this right should be gendered - any pregnant people of any gender, race, or age should be allowed to decide if another person can be in their body or not. I don’t believe people have a…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/26 03:56 AM
2

For me the tax benefits were not that “slight” at all. I also was able to add my husband to my health insurance, which is very expensive otherwise. There is also a full legal framework for joint assets. Additionally even some of the benefits that you can technically get other ways (like next of kin, shared assets) are still real benefits, it’s much easier to get the whole marriage package in one day than go through the million legal steps just to avoid marriage for no reason. It is not and shoul…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/26 08:37 PM
3

Marriage has legal benefits, “tradition” is not the only reason to get married. I grew up in USA and had no expectation that I should have to change my name to be married, just as my mother (who also grew up here) didn’t change hers 45 years ago.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/26 07:53 PM
12

Yes and I married him. Actually I think I have probably made more than all the men I’ve dated, although most of my dating history I was dating other students and none of us were making much at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/26 02:38 AM
–

You said one woman gave you ultimatums before you even met! She was transparent and you still chose to see her and complain to us about her preferences. But a lot of compatibility things don’t become apparent on day 1 - it’s literally the point of dating, so you can get to know someone and then learn if they are compatible. Someone super into porn should find someone who gives ultimatums about it incompatible and move on when they find that out. There are some into porn and women fine with men w…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 08:53 PM
–

It’s not a double standard to want someone who is sexually compatible. You are the one with the weird standard in that you want women to still fuck you even though you aren’t sexually compatible.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 08:22 PM
–

Just date women who are okay with porn if it’s so important to you. Porn and sex toys aren’t the same thing though. The comparison to women’s sex toys is men’s sex toys. The comparison to men watching porn is women watching it. Porn involves real people, and lusting for real people is a bit different than enjoying the sensations toys bring. Men I have dated enjoyed toys as much as me, because sexual compatibility is important to me so I passed on men who didn’t like them. If something is importa…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 08:20 PM
1

Extremely controlling to think you should have exclusive “visual access” to a woman. She should just stay indoors forever? I even saw you say everyone should wear long shirts and pants even swimming in the ocean lol. Most women would probably pass on men this extreme. I personally want to live my life in clothes I want to wear and not be so uptight, and I would only want a man similar. Clothes can be fun, like maybe I want to look hot when on a date with my man so he will want to have sex later,…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/26 10:16 PM
2

More or less, Yes. I'd tweak your statement to say they don't actually want to orgasm, they have more important goals for the sexual encounter than their own climax. I understand that's not how YOU think, but try to imagine how OTHER women think. Most other women agree with me, they DO want to orgasm during sex. Got any links of women talking about how they had a one night stand with a goal of no orgasm, but instead to “lock the guy down”? Why do they think bad sex would make a guy want to be wi…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 07:33 PM
0

So your theory is that women don’t orgasm as much in casual encounters because they don’t actually want sex but have ulterior motives, and are completely distracted by that and not pursuing enjoyment? Lol The real answer is: sex is an intimate activity and therefore is better when there is strong love feelings and less anxiety. True for both genders, you can see men orgasm more too in a relationship. It is also likely a stronger effect for women since being comfortable and safe with a guy will u…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 06:15 PM
3

Yep, different people reach it at different times.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/26 06:26 AM
6

For me personally, I can’t “really like” someone I just met, as I don’t know them at all yet. So the statement could be true as in, on the first date that occurs after reaching the point of really liking someone, I’d want to sleep with him. But often “first date” is also “first meeting” so I just wouldn’t be at the stage of “really like” yet.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/26 12:00 AM
15

Those are about groceries and household expenses. The article in your OP is about investments. Keep in mind you can’t add percentages from different groups together like you are trying to. Everyone has grocery expenses. Most people don’t invest.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/26 10:52 PM
4

And the vast majority of women are NOT promiscuous either. It’s not something all women are doing and men are being left out of. Women are not joining harems. Most people pair up. I don’t think women have become more promiscuous in the last 10 years - studies show everyone has become LESS. People are partying less and having less casual sex. Both genders are having less hookups. I never said men and women are the same. I said if an activity is something we think is a bad activity, it’s bad for b…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/26 05:46 PM
1

Okay, so if something is easy, that doesn’t automatically make it bad, does it? Are you saying you think anything easy DOES make it bad and we should judge people for it and encourage them not to do it? If I enjoy reading, and don’t find it complicated at all - that’s bad for me to do? If I can get to sleep easily, does that make it bad? We should encourage only people who have a hard time sleeping to sleep, and shame anyone who can do it easily? I presume if you get off easily to a certain sex …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/26 02:05 AM
1

Where did I say anything about judging people for their innate abilities? I don’t think I mentioned that at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/26 01:22 AM
2

Yes, my man was too shy to go on a dating site and date strangers. He didn’t see women as aliens and be unable to even speak to them while still being able to speak to men. That sounds really extreme, how would I even ever get to meet a guy like that? Sounds like he’s legit scared of women. My man wouldn’t be meeting stranger men online either. We met organically and I invited him into my friend group, in which we naturally grew closer together. That couldn’t have happened if he was too scared t…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/26 05:49 PM
5

How on earth is it bad for society if women do an activity (with men), but not bad if the men do it (with women)? That doesn’t even make any sense - they are both doing it together! If that’s not what you mean, then sounds like you should reply to OP and argue your position that we should shame everyone for it and that is not “completely different” if a man does it like OP claims. I am arguing with his point that we should shame only women because it’s bad if women do it since it’s easy, and eas…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/26 05:41 PM
-1

My man was a 30 year old virgin when we got together. I have a thing for shy guys. Shyness is one thing, however being unable to even have a conversation with me would be a problem. It’s especially odd if he can converse with men, but not women. How does he even hold down a job?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/26 07:01 AM
24

The double standard exists for men and women for a reason. For the average guy, hooking up with an average girl is NOT an easy feat, whereas a girl can pretty much hook up with soooo many guys compared to her "looks match". This key difference is why women being "sluts" is inherently a bad thing, and a guy being a "slut" is completely different because that man must have some KEY trait that DRAWS women to him since naturally they are far more selective. You say this difference is WHY it’s bad, b…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/25 07:04 AM
1

It obviously hasn’t been working though, it just wastes everyone’s time and makes more women leave the apps, leaving even fewer options.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/25 05:48 AM
3

But the blue ones won’t match. Women are looking for compatible people. If he wants to change his preferences to more align with blue pebbles, then he needs to update his profile to match those and pick blue ones. If his profile says he doesn’t want kids but he tries to match with women who do and who don’t, the ones do want kids aren’t going to match with him.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/25 05:34 AM
0

If a man doesn't get matches, how is being MORE selective supposed to help? This advice has never made sense to me. Because women are trying to match with men they think might be compatible. If you just message all the women you can find, and not just ones you would actually be compatible with, those women won’t go out with you - they are looking for men who read their profile and seem to have a compatible profile. If you actually pick women who are compatible to begin with, and not leave all th…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/25 04:37 AM
–

If you want a bunch of casual partners, then yes you have to be open to partying and having a good time casually with a bunch of people. This isn’t “saying something about women”, it’s saying something about casual sex. If you are a homebody then casual sex is probably not your ideal setup, find another homebody and pair up together instead. If you think partnering with one person means you are a “beta loser” but partying with multiple people means “self destruction” the what the hell kind of se…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/25 02:47 PM
–

No, no one has ever even asked how many people I’ve slept with.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/25 05:06 PM
–

It’s not even required in all states. I’ve never taken one before, and I’m 42 and have had my license since I was 15. In the state I got my first license, it wasn’t required if I took a Driver’s Ed course. And in the state I live in, it’s not required to renew the license.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/25 03:16 AM
–

I’ll give some examples of when I’ve felt like this, so maybe you can gain some understanding. Hit it off with a dude at a party, we enjoyed talking and then making out. I wanted a mutually fun hookup. He puts a condom on, enters me, and finishes in about 10 seconds. I did not have any orgasms. He goes to sleep. Did I consent? Yes. Did I feel used? Also yes. You say “you used each others bodies” but in fact I was not allowed to use his body at all, he didn’t let me ride him or anything, he ended…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/12/25 09:35 PM
2

“Hitting on” him how? I am having trouble imagining a scenario where I would be somehow watching a woman talk to him, but not part of the conversation. If you mean like we were sitting at a bar and a woman came up and asked him out, I’d probably just have a surprised look on my face that a woman would do that. Don’t think I’d “react” much more than that.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/25 06:32 PM
2

The “depends on what he says” was in response to “what is your reaction”. I never desire men to approach me - and my reaction to men who do will depend on what he is doing or saying. Not seeing what is confusing about that? If a man “approaches” me by cornering me in the bus shelter and staring at my chest intently, then saying “you’re so hot!” my reaction might be to try to get out of the bus shelter so I don’t feel cornered. But if a man “approaches” me by asking if I want a drink when I’m at …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/25 06:16 PM
12

Depends on what he says and where we are. If someone m asks me out, I usually just say something like no thank you. Sometimes they are persistent, I’ve had guys be like “but why” and I’ll say I’m married and they go “so?” That’s pretty annoying. And some guys get offended if I bring up that I am taken, it’s weird. So I try to refuse by saying as little as possible unless it seems like saying more might help me to exit the situation.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/25 10:35 AM
29

I personally don’t want to be approached by random men I don’t know. It’s okay if I am, it’s not like I’m gonna kill a dude who does or something, and as long as he asks respectively and then respects my “no” I won’t think bad of him. I just don’t actively desire it. I’m in a happy relationship and not looking for another. When I was young and single I was more okay with it in places for socializing with other people my age, like the arcade, bowling alley, bars, music events, and especially if i…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/25 05:43 AM
6

Yes, that is also creepy as hell! Doesn’t seem to be what this post is about though. And it’s not as common. Every woman I know has gotten sexual attention starting as a child, only a few men got it from women as children, more often boys get sexual attention by adult men actually. You can see in men’s popular porn being teenagers, which is not a popular category for women’s porn/erotica, and how often men go on about how much they value “youth” even to the point of insisting it’s a universal ma…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 09:58 PM
17

People who make fun of older guys interested in younger women can't help implying that She can do better than you, suggesting logically that Younger women have more options because they are more desirable. I don't see any way out of this one. Literally no one is claiming age gaps are bad because young women are undesirable by men, lol. We totally know men desire them as young as possible, we have all been little girls before and know men start trying to be sexual with us by 11 or 12. It’s known …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 05:36 PM
2

He would probably be down for a threesome with another woman, but not another man, which is what I was talking about. I think he would enjoy it if we put stuff online haha. I’m just not as into that. Even if we did that it wouldn’t be OF, just amateur porn or something. As like I said, OF involves chatting with the guys sexually, that’s gross and not worth the minimum wage or whatever.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 12:44 AM
2

No, I wouldn’t do that, as I have agreed to monogamy and am happy being monogamous. Doesn’t mean it grosses me out. If he was into having a threesome or something I’d be okay with it and not grossed out if it was with a man I was sexually attracted to. He doesn’t want that, though, so neither do I (I would only want to do things we both are interested in). My man would actually be fine with me doing OF, though (not with other men but with him or myself he would be fine, he is kind of into exhibi…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/25 11:42 PM
2

No, I’ve had sex with other men before my husband and wasn’t grossed out. Would be hard to have done any dating if he was the only person in the world I would be able to have sex with. Yeah if I did it with my husband I wouldn’t be grossed out, but it would feel quite exposing to have such intimate moments public. I don’t think it’s humiliating specifically, I just am not living in a place sex work is “celebrated” or whatever and it’s considered kinda low class. And also, like I said, I’d be emb…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/25 10:20 PM
3

Not sure, I’ve never done it before. I think I’d be embarrassed to do it and thinking my family might see it or something. I’d feel grossed out if I had to have sex with men I didn’t want to, or talk about sex with gross men. Doubt I’d feel “guilty” though, guilty of what? There’s a lot of things I would be uncomfortable doing, therefore I don’t do them. I’d be embarrassed even to do something like acting or newscasting or something, I am just too shy for being so seen I suppose. Why WOULD I do …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/25 09:44 PM
3

I don’t have time to do it, it sounds like a lot of work, and I make way more money with my time in other ways. It doesn’t really interest me. Why WOULD I do it is the real question. I heard a big part of it is chatting/engaging with the men, that sounds gross and isn’t how I want to spend my time. I’m in my 40s, seems like that’s not a group going to make much money on OF, men seem to prefer teenagers for their porn. I’m pretty reserved, I wouldn’t be able to do it with my face exposed, I’d wor…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/25 06:59 PM
11

Women have so much more opportunities to easily opt out of commitment, whether its no fault divorce, abortion, I mean society literally pushes women to pursue careers, become financially independent, so they don't have to rely on a man and they can always have one foot out the door. Men also benefit from no fault divorce, abortion, and being financially independent… I am so confused, are you saying men are encouraged to be financially dependent on women?? Society doesn't allow women to be held t…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/25 09:54 PM
–

Really? I didn’t get married for that long, we just had no need for marriage before. Once we were older and had shared assets, a need for shared insurance, tax breaks, etc, we felt it would be of benefit to get married.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/25 10:56 PM
2

I think this is one of the more interesting divides between men and women. You’re not insulting him, you’re telling him something he doesn’t know. Are you seriously suggesting men don’t know when their own body is extremely fat, like only women have the ability to use mirrors or what? This is just not believable, I’m sorry. As a man, the problem with just hearing I don’t have interest in you is You feel cursed by the world because you don’t have any explicit reasons why it shouldn’t happen, it j…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/25 01:42 AM
1

I did say I just didn’t have romantic feelings for him. Why insult him on top of it. It seemed it would be obvious, do obese men really not know that isn’t attractive??
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 08:24 PM
–

The stats on growing ideological divide between men and women shows men's ideals have relatively remained the same yet women are increasingly becoming radical, yet all the discussion is about "young men being radicalized"... exposes a clear agenda pushed by society I don’t think women wanting equal rights and not gender-based roles is that radical. Men should also change to get with the times, trying to have an ideology that doesn’t work with the current economy seems like a problem. women in re…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 08:18 PM
4

I have no problem with friends developing feelings. I have had two relationships that started that way, including my husband. And I’ve had other friends who developed feelings that I declined. But I’ve also absolutely had men who were just pretending. It’s two different things. Example of a man just pretending: when I turn him down and say I am not romantically interested, he got mad at me and called me a whore, willing to fuck <other guy I dated> but not him, and he had put in so much time and …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 05:34 PM
8

Men have the same reproductive rights. They also aren’t banned from doing what they want with their reproductive organs anywhere, whereas women have laws preventing what they can do with their uterus in many places. And being able to control where sperm goes sounds much cooler than how we can’t control ovulation, I wish I could control it. Even if you think “being treated like a man” meant I couldn’t terminate my own pregnancy (which I disagree, I think men still have a right to end their pregna…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 05:42 AM
11

People don’t care about my feelings. Everyone thinks women are overreacting to everything, even doctors don’t care about our feelings and will even claim actual physical ailments are just our feelings! My family does expect me to be a provider, though. People are not nice to me all the time, I’ve even had men I thought were nice try to assault me - which is extremely mean, they were pretending until I was in a vulnerable position. I asked my partner and he hasn’t noticed anyone being mean to him…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 05:16 AM
3

Women who say that are saying that’s what’s needed to date them specifically, and will choose not to date men who don’t do that. If you only want to go out with women who are prostitutes, then you should only see prostitutes, you are free to say no to dates just like women are. I’m sure women who aren’t your type will leave you alone if you are clear in your profile you want women who will exchange sex for a meal. Don’t try to make a claim that all women have to be prostitutes for a cheap meal b…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/25 09:54 PM
13

You are not obligated to pay. It’s a dating behavior some people like, you are free to only date women who don’t expect it. If you do decide to pay for a date - you aren’t purchasing sex, you are purchasing dinner or a movie or whatever you actually purchased. If you want to purchase sex, you should pay someone who is selling sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/25 05:49 PM
3

I currently work for a huge corporation AND own a business, and have had my own businesses since I was 15. I know many other women that own businesses, including many in my own family. Many of the successful women I know have kids too, it’s not mutually exclusive, just like it isn’t for men. I’m actually unusual at my work for not having kids, I know a bunch of high level women with kids, so they certainly promote women with kids. I also have actually worked for some of the places you listed lol…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/25 05:46 AM
2

Yes the sex with my husband is much better. Being in love and bonded long term plus being sexually compatible is the best.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/25 04:51 PM
4

Attraction was there, sexual compatibility was there. Compatibility in other areas was lacking. Sex can be good even if we didn’t have similar plans in how we wanted to spend our lives and so weren’t compatible for a long term relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/25 07:01 AM
23

I’ve had relationships that didn’t last long because it was just the sex that was good. Might have lasted longer than it should have, but eventually no matter how good the sex is, you want to do other things and be compatible in other areas.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/25 12:49 AM
–

Just shove all that stuff about taking dick in your ass or in your mouth as some sort of sacrifice you do for him out door because I've done all that and its fun if you are actually attracted to the partner. Well, seems you proved the claim that women don’t face pressure to perform wrong! And showed how it can be a lot worse, expecting the woman to do painful things and even blaming her if she finds it painful. You are literally doing it now lol. Exactly how shitty men pressure women to perform,…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/25 04:08 AM
2

Try stuffing a dick in your mouth or in your ass when it doesn’t fit, or bending in weird ways, or having sex when you aren’t aroused enough. Men have had no problem rubbing or licking my clit so if it’s that hard for you, maybe you need to do some stretching or something. Men that have sucked in bed didn’t even try, it’s not that it was hard, they just want us to get off with zero clit attention (even telling us it’s abnormal to need it, one more pressure women face). Being pressured to PERFORM…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/25 07:42 AM
0

I’m explaining the thing that women face pressure to do, in response to the claim men face much more pressure to perform during sex. Anal is something men are obsessed with much more than me, I assure you, that’s why I was faced with them pressuring me to perform it! I find it insane for men to claim the pressure to rub the clit during sex is somehow so much worse than the pressure women face to get choked with dick or have anal or other painful sex acts.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/25 06:59 AM
3

Have you ever tried deepthroating or receiving anal???? Maybe it’s easy for you, but it’s not remotely easy for me. Maybe as a man your ass is bigger and that’s why you find it so easy. I can’t grow my mouth any bigger. Cock rings and working out increase stamina, not sure why you think that isn’t changeable. Learning how to stimulate the clit is gonna get you much farther than penis length.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/25 05:57 AM
3

Are you kidding??? Men will literally show their gfs porn to get them to try to do things they see, they will pressure for difficult-to-do things like anal and deepthroating, they will call women prudes and starfish if they aren’t good in bed.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/25 03:41 AM
1

Yes of course. If they didn’t have toys before dating me, they did after, as I would buy them some or we’d go to the store and pick out some together. My husband has bought me toys and I have bought him toys, and we have a lot we bought together. It’s great to add some fun in the bedroom!
/r/PurplePillDebate28/11/25 09:52 PM
1

First link just says “looks standards are greater for casual sex” Uh… that’s not saying she hates her husband isn’t the best and was just a safe option or that he is chosen for his money and job…. Second link says a man might spend more money dating than on a hooker. That’s ALSO not saying anything about hating her husband isn’t the best and being chosen for his money and job…. Are these just random links to a user you don’t like??? I don’t really see any connection here.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/25 04:18 PM
4

(like even here there are so many bluepill women who say that they hate their husband wasn't the best guy she dated and was just the safe option or that he is just chosen for his money and job. What?? You saw many blue pill women here say that? Can you link me to some? Lastly how can you marry someone you don't love and spend your whole life with him , sleep with him and have children with him while secretly resenting him?? Yeah that sounds nuts to me. But isn’t that more of a conservative thing…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/25 08:35 AM
1

Did you read the final paragraph? 200 men fighting over 20 women means the limited number of attractive ones will go with someone more attractive than you. How do you figure you have the same chances fighting against 199 other men for 20 as for 5? PLUS many move over to Jar C (not being single anymore at all) within a day or two since they were just there temporarily, and will get good offers to join Jar C quickly.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/25 05:17 PM
7

No, you are talking to a man. …and?? Look I’ll try to simplify it. Let’s say you have two jars of jelly beans. 10% of the beans in both the jars are green. Jar A has 200 total jelly beans in it, and Jar B has 50. This means there are 20 green jelly beans in Jar A, but only 5 in Jar B! Even though the percent of green beans is the same, there are more in one jar than the other. Now imagine you are fighting with 199 other people for jelly beans. You could go for Jar A and each person could get one…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/25 10:01 AM
11

Seems like you are having a misunderstanding of how math works. They can’t because there are not many women interested in casual sex. Even ones who are it’s usually just when they are single, often they prefer being in a relationship but just aren’t at that time and are horny. Hot women can find relationships easier and will spend less time single. If 85 women are looking for a relationship and 15 are looking for casual, the chance of finding someone in the 85 group that you find hot is higher t…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/25 06:37 AM
9

Out of women who have casual sex and relationships, the standards for casual sex are lower than for a relationship. The reason it can be harder for men to find casual sex than a relationship is that there is much less women looking for casual sex. It’s a numbers issue of the amount of women open to it at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/25 06:02 AM
2

Yeah it’s fuckin weird, right? It’s especially hard if the elbows cause pain and suffering due to a defect and needed surgery to alter them, and that defect is the part they had a fetish for. No point in me getting with a man who was only very interested in me because of a fetish he had for something that I knew I would have to remove. So men who were they types to ask me out on sight alone were a solid sign of an elbow fetishist that would not be supportive of me fixing the problem when I could…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/25 10:25 AM
6

Well I straight up said I was rejected! I never said anything was men’s fault? Some men even told me why, like because I was “too tall”, or “too forward”. But also I have had shy men who were friends or boyfriends tell me they messed up chances with women in the past because they panicked when pursued. This is not me “just discovering” anything, the last time I asked a man out like 25 years ago. I am just saying asking men out didn’t result in any better chances than letting men ask me out. Noth…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/25 04:52 AM
4

It’s just never worked for me. Most men just aren’t my type, but a lot of men have a fetish for a part of my body. I needed to filter men out before I could date them, I didn’t have time or energy to date every man attracted to a body part to find it out. Men approaching me in bars were just usually men who I could rule out within a single conversation. I had better luck with a narrower group already pre-filtered more to my interests - like men online who had descriptive bios with similar intere…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/25 12:50 AM
5

That’s probably why I am not really into men who cold approach at bars. They tend to just like my body, and chances they are compatible personality wise is slim, since I’m kind of weird. Men who approach when there is already some commonality in personality, like having some shared friends, chatting in class/work and hitting it off, in a hobby group - those are the kind I dated.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/25 12:04 AM
3

I’m DO want the men to ask me out though, as I said all my boyfriends are the ones who asked me out. Just not a cold approach in a bar, it’s not really my thing. Men I went to school with or met in hobby groups were more my style. Men who ask girls out can still want to commit, and asking men out does not increase the chances they will want a long term relationship. I don’t think there is any connection between commitment and who asked who out…?? Plenty of men will ask women out because they jus…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/25 11:56 PM
2

I would never date a man who cold approached me in the bar. You are talking about psychology of CEOs here and I was talking about psychology of actual shy men. Wanting to mate is a normal behavior 99% of humans have - not just aggressive ones, and certainly not just ones who want to be CEOs. Shy men will gain the courage to ask out a girl they like if they like her enough - it is just objectively false that only “aggressive” men will do this. It’s also a decent filter for women to make sure guys…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/25 11:03 PM
16

What is your evidence that “only the most aggressive men” pursue women?? I haven’t found that to be the case, personally. I have a thing for shy nerdy guys, and have had multiple boyfriends that fit that - and all of them asked me out. The men of this type that I asked out all said no. Actually this type of guy seems to get quite scared if I pursue them too directly, asking them out! It’s much better to just let them get comfortable with me and naturally get the courage up to ask me out, rather …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/25 10:09 PM
2

My brother is actually way more confident than I am. Hell, he had multiple girlfriends and a wife at the same time, I never would have even thought to suggest having that to men I was with, lol. So if I was him, I’d be as confident as he is!
/r/PurplePillDebate15/11/25 07:55 AM
3

Then you can’t just “walk out the door”, you have an expensive shared asset, and each of you is actually responsible for the mortgage even if the other stops paying. It’s the same as what I was saying where my partner and I owned the house 50/50 before marriage, so no one “signed away half the wealth” since we each already owned half!
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/25 05:30 PM
5

No one except my parents has ever offered to have me live in a house “for free”. And even they made me work on the ranch and watch my younger sibling! I AM a boss, and I’ve worked hard so my man and I can live comfortably, I don’t see why it would make me single… My husband has no problem with me earning money in to pay our bills lol. We are childfree so we dont have to worry about children. But when we were considering if we wanted them it was logical to us that he would quit his job if we did,…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 11:18 PM
3

So you each own your own house? Most Americans can’t afford that.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 11:08 PM
17

Right, if not, she is literally a slave. This is why laws for sharing assets with marriage even if one person doesn’t work for outside income even exist.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 08:08 AM
16

Most people marry someone with past partners… I don’t think most men think they are “purchasing goods” though lol. Strange way to think of marriage these days - did you purchase her from her father for 3 goats? My man did not put a ring on anything and there are no kids (and will not be). He isn’t married because society pressured him, hell we had family say we should years before we did and ignored them. We decided together like adults, and by then we already owned a house together and were liv…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 06:27 AM
1

I make a lot more than my partner. I haven’t noticed the advantages you mention. I was not ever in an abusive relationship so can’t speak to that one. But I haven’t felt I have “more power and control of the relationship”. When/how would this power be used exactly? Also he does half the chores, so it hasn’t been the case he does more of that. I don’t think there’s been disadvantages to him by “society” due to him not fulfilling society’s role, but he’s very introverted and his friends also earn …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/25 11:55 PM
2

Men are still net tax payers, and women are net beneficiaries. This is an effective transfer of wealth from men to women via taxes and welfare. Source? Mostly children and disabled people are getting welfare. Plenty of men are disabled. Men also fill up the majority of our prisons, which cost taxpayers way more than the $300/yr for SNAP to feed poor people. Who is we? I don't remember agreeing to this. Do you understand how voting works? It doesn’t mean 100% of people have to agree. It means the…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/25 12:54 AM
2

Both single fathers and single mothers are tax beneficiaries. I only compared men to women to illustrate the hypocrisy that feminists ask for equal rights, yet when it comes to taxation, demand the net transfer of wealth from men to women, which goes against the egalitarianism so proudly preached by feminists. But that’s not what you illustrated at all. You just illustrated that all adults pay for all children, nothing about transferring wealth from men to women. Children are not “women” and adu…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/25 07:39 PM
4

Why are you comparing “average single man” to “average single mother”? Shouldn’t you be comparing “average single father”? And include how much child support men owe but don’t pay, causing the children to need government assistance? Both parents are responsible if a child needs that, not just women. Women who aren’t mothers also have to have their tax dollars spent on other people’s children, this isn’t somehow paid with a man-only tax. People who earn more pay for food assistance for poor child…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/25 07:53 AM
6

It may be true that it is quite normal for men to objectify women sexually, or be more sexually focused on objects. But it doesn’t make it any easier to learn that as a woman no matter how normal it is for men. It can be heartbreaking to believe in romantic ideas of being in love with a best friend and finding out they are just into you because they have a fetish for a specific body part you have, which I guess is when women might feel the “ick”.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/25 09:43 AM
21

Seems like you don’t really understand what women usually mean with these terms. When a man "objectifies" you, he thinks your face and body is attractive. That doesn't mean he's minimizing you to your face and body over your personhood. No, that is not what it means. Finding someone attractive is not objectifying them. Here’s an example of when I have felt objectified, you can clearly see the man is valuing only my body: I meet a guy on a bus, he flirts with me, we exchange socials. I’m excited …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/25 12:17 AM
1

I mean I was looking for a lifelong partner, so I didn’t think it was casual. One I dated for years. It’s just none developed into the lifelong thing I wanted until the final relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/25 07:14 PM
1

I dunno, I never purposely went looking for another relationship as fast as I could or something. It’s just I’d be single and then guys would be asking me out, so I would go out, and then I’d enjoy being with a guy so I’d go out again and then it becomes a relationship within a few months. So the same as how the first relationship started, wasn’t scared of anything, it was just how relationships worked for me after I became an adult. None of the relationships except the last were ever far along …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/25 05:57 PM
3

Sometimes sex can create a feeling of closeness and love that feels like it is mutual but it isn’t. And it can be really exciting to think the sex was going to continue happening, and maybe even develop into something more, but then the other person says no they don’t want to do it again. I’ve known people of both genders experience this, and some people wait until there is a real closeness before having sex for that reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/25 12:24 AM
1

Huh? I never said anything about criminal behavior only being inherited from men. I said mental illness and anti-social behavior could be inherited - from both parents. There have been plenty of studies to show mental illness is hereditary. Somehow I doubt skin color is that related to mental illness or anti social behavior. That is another inherited thing, but why would you think the gene causing reduced melanin production is also a gene that somehow causes less mental illness? Because this gen…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/25 12:20 AM
3

Why do you think it’s the single mother causing violent rapists, and not bad genes? Maybe the kind of father who abandons his kids has genetics correlating to violence, or maybe the mother left because he was violent. Or maybe the mother has a bad mental illness and that’s why the dad left. Do you have evidence that of a violent dad stays with the family, the son is less likely to be violent than if that dad left?? It just sounds unlikely to me, you are probably just seeing genetic inheritance w…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/25 09:39 PM
26

I met someone who did this. It wasn’t at all about not being able to find a man or being ugly, she is asexual and had no desire to be with a man or woman in that way. But she desired to be a mother. Families come in all kinds of ways, there are lots of single mothers, I don’t see that her reason is worse than the person I know who just has shitty taste in men and decided to keep an accidental pregnancy and her boyfriend accused her of being a whore and ran out on her. Both of them are actually g…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/25 03:42 PM
1

I enjoy hanging out with people I like, or getting to know people I think I might like, and doing something fun with them. It can be exciting to get to know someone and learning we have compatibilities and might want to have more dates. What I'm looking for is what in the whole process do you get out of it? Describe feelings. Emotions. What is rewarding about it? Well for the first date with my husband, he took me on a day trip to another city, which is a fun trip to make people do sometimes in …
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/25 08:05 AM
–

The probabilities didn’t matter to me, I would only want someone I am compatible with, or not have a relationship at all. There are a lot of people on this planet, even if only a small percentage of guys are suitable that’s still millions of people. Hell, just the normal requirements of an age range and being single makes it a small percentage. A bad relationship sounds terrible to me, much worse than being single. At least while single I could still find a partner eventually, why would I take m…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/25 07:15 AM
2

You don’t really mention many things I actually care about when dating. I tend to care about if the guy is chill, we have shared interests, have good chemistry, and he is intelligent enough to have good convos about fun things like science, space, and tech. You haven’t said what any of these guys interests actually are, so I don’t have enough info. Anyone who I don’t have good sex with I have to rule out, that’s a deal breaker. Wanting kids is also a deal breaker. Having kids is not great, altho…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/25 12:43 AM
0

Most women I know have slept with or hooked up with a 6 ft+ shredded guy at some point in their lives. Really?? How do you know that? Statistically, most women don’t hook up at all. And not many men are 6ft and shredded. So seems like you hang out in a very rare crowd that includes women who hook up with 6 ft shredded guys… but also includes a lot of men who are virgins?? AND these women TALK to you about their hookups??? This is all very unlikely, statistically speaking. I can’t say I’ve even m…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/25 12:24 AM
5

I see men working out wearing less than any women. No one cares. What made you think people wouldn’t like it, did you try wearing something and had people complain? This is a wild claim when if women tried to go shirtless like men do all the time, it would be actually illegal…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/25 08:51 PM
2

No, because I don’t hear comments by people anymore. It’s like looking normal after having a disfigurement that caused everyone to stare. No one stares now, or if they do, it’s like a look at my boobs like a good one, like “nice boobs”, not a “wtf” look. Honestly one of the most amazing things was after surgery going to the mall and realizing no one was looking at me, at all. I was just a normal person in the mall, not a freak. Life changing. I truly didn’t realize how much better it would be ps…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/25 02:17 AM
2

Very. My first bikini was at age 36 after surgery! No swimsuits in my size/shape before that. And I def had people staring at me (and harassment) before even in a swim shirt. Now I can go in a bikini and people don’t stare cuz I’m more normal shaped plus I’m old. It’s great. I think my body shape was more attracting things like that than my clothing choice. Clothing doesn’t prevent assholes from being assholes, unfortunately.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/25 01:57 AM
5

I’ve gone out in more revealing clothes and did not get harassed more. For example, clubbing, going to the beach, scantily clad bike ride events, work events where we have to wear fancy dresses that showed my body, it was never increased in those times. If I go in public, there is a small percentage of men who harass me, and they don’t become nicer just because I wear clothing men here think is somehow protective. Even in a full winter coat and hat/hood. Literally the only thing that has ever de…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 09:42 PM
3

First of all, that is false that they don’t get harassed, women in those countries face some of the highest rates of sexual harassment and assault in the world. So men you know specifically target women not wearing hijabs for abuse, so you think wearing a hijab actually protects women? Do you wear hijab to protect yourself from men too?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 05:00 PM
11

Helmets protect your brain because they encase it and take the damage instead of your head. Clothing doesn’t stop anyone from sexually harassing you, because how could it?? Can you share some links to clothing that would protect a woman from men the way a helmet protects brains?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 09:58 AM
15

The most common outfit I’ve been wearing when harassed was professional clothes while commuting to work. That’s because sexual harassment is much more about opportunity, not the clothing a woman wears. Also just to acknowledge I've never harassed a woman for what shes wearing or otherwise, but I know it obviously goes on with creeps out there. If you haven’t done it before, how exactly do you “know it obviously” that creeps choose to pick on women based on their outfit choice? Data doesn’t back …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 09:53 AM
–

Some people are manipulated easier, are more gullible, or have their own problems, age is obviously not the only factor.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/25 04:40 PM
–

Younger women often don’t recognize the red flags. They don’t know what red flags are since they don’t have experience seeing them. You can see this in the relationship subs, younger women asking about things and completely missing the terrible red flags and putting up with shit. Older women have experience and see it from farther away. It’s not about options, it’s about life experience to recognize patterns.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/25 03:10 PM
–

I absolutely am aroused by some men individually, but I guess not to “men” as a group, since that group is quite a wide range and varying! I only date and have sex with men who I am attracted to. Often it’s not the visuals specifically that are the most arousing part for me- it’s their presence around me, their scent (very important), the way their chest hair feels on my cheeks, the way their fingers feel touching me, the way my body feels their body when we hug…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 11:11 PM
39

I am in a friend group where most of the women make more money than the men (so they aren’t “providers”), none are in the army, they work around equal hours, and some of them are pretty emotional. They just don’t care that red pill types think they are cucks or whatever, they live in a liberal area and it’s literally no problem at all. I can’t speak to Ukraine, but if you are in the US there are plenty of cities you can live where you won’t be forced to conform to a gender role.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 07:00 AM
–

They were angry if I rejected them and expected me to act the way a tool would, not a person, and told me they thought that because of my body shape. Like being mad if your toaster doesn’t toast.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/25 08:12 AM
–

I’m saying society sexualized them, not something an individual man does. Attraction is just being attracted to someone, you can obviously still treat someone as a full human while being attracted to them. Objectification is when you see someone as an object for your use. It’s quite easy to tell, imagine how you treat a male friend compared to how you treat a toaster. Men who say things like “look I didn’t go on a date to talk about books” while staring at my boobs or who get angry at me for not…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/25 06:36 AM
–

I am not sure what you mean. By over sexualized I mean making something out to be all about sex that isn’t necessarily sexual, boobs in reality don’t automatically mean bigger = more sexual, yet that is often how it’s portrayed and perceived in our culture.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/25 05:56 AM
1

I think men have varied tastes. But society (both men and women) seems to sexualize large boobs and women who have them to a high degree. I don’t think something being over sexualized means all men prefer that thing. Some men do and some don’t. Also some men specifically don’t want to date women they are very attracted to for some reason. They will even say women with certain body shapes are for having sex with but not for dating. (There was a post on this sub earlier this week by a man expressi…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/25 07:16 AM
8

Big things might just be more noticeable. And sometimes unusual things attract fetishes. You could ask the same question about big boobs. Most men say they like all size boobs, yet big boobs seem to be extra sexualized and fetishized.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 05:49 AM
3

My husband and I just don’t have time or money for kids, nor are we so into them it would be worth the time and money. Not everyone has the same interests. If I had lots of freetime and money I probably would have considered it. When everyone needs to have multiple jobs (seriously everyone I know has a side gig or two) where is there time to do it? And for what reason anyway? I can’t see any benefit to having kids, it’s only good if that is your interest or hobby. I have no interest in babies so…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/25 11:57 PM
14

You blamed what after your failure? What did you try to do to change your circumstances? Did you move to a bigger city? Did you hang out in places where women similar to you hang out? Do you actually like women who would like men like you or would you be suspicious of them since you find yourself unlikable? Are you saying you blamed women after your failure? Developing a strategy of scaring more women off doesn’t really sound that helpful if your problem is women not liking you.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/25 05:43 AM
13

Lots of men want to be smarter than the women they date. Moving to a city helped me a lot or find more of a variety of men, making it easier to find men who were into me. I now live away from the city with my husband, but when young I think being where there is more young people really can help. I live in fear from men just because of my past experiences. Stats aren’t lies, it’s best to be careful and cautious. It’s not just women, my husband gives his young adult female relatives tasers as gift…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/25 05:28 AM
22

It probably would have if I had decided to blame men for it and make weird standards for dates based on insecurity instead of working on changing my circumstances.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/25 05:22 AM
35

Short guy goes out into the world, hits on some girls, gets brutally rejected (they laugh in his face, call him short, say he's not a real man, etc). This man then is then later insecure about his height, rightfully so. Then bluepillers only solution is to say "just don't be insecure". It’s not the act of being insecure at all that is the problem. It’s the taking it out on women and coming to strange conclusions about women because of it. I don’t care about dating a short guy, but I wouldn’t dat…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/25 01:19 AM
–

If men's concern about women's sexual history signals male insecurity, lack of sex appeal & inexperience; why can't you just marry highly experienced, sexually gifted & secure men? We do.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 11:57 PM
3

And you would have had an even better one if your parents talked it out, lived in a culture and society where they realized how their conflicts affect their children. Huh? I think maybe you misunderstood. My parents did not divorce. You can not “talk it out” to cure mental illness. I am saying I would have been better if they divorced and I didn’t have to live with my psycho mother. Having both parents as part of a good household, where conflict is resolved (or effort is put there) is something …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/25 03:40 AM
4

But the most important thing is a difficult life is still better than one where there is divorce - the challenges are part of life, we need to overcome them, not abandon the marriage. This is just false. My life would have been vastly improved if my dad divorced my mom and took me away from her. I have panic attacks to this day from things she did to me 40 years ago. (All completely legal things to do to children, btw, not legally domestic abuse, but still terrible things and extremely traumatiz…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/25 03:17 AM
1

The reason men have it better is because when things go bad, they usually aren’t getting drugged, raped, or beaten. When things go bad in dating for women, it can be terrifying. Have you ever been drugged by someone so they could forcibly penetrate your body? I have just never heard any complaint by men as scary as when I was drugged by a man and he attempted to assault me, luckily I didn’t drink enough of the drug and was able to come to and push him off me, it was still terrifying as fuck and …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/25 01:34 AM
3

One common analogy is "don't ask a fish how to catch a fish, ask a fisherman". The most common objections to it are that fish don't want to be caught, and that it implies a predatory relationship between fisherman and fish. I actually don’t think this is a flaw in the analogy at all, I think people who make this analogy actually do see women this way. They see themselves as a hunter or predator, and women as the prey to catch. You can ask them questions and this view comes out in other ways, not…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/25 05:41 AM
–

Yes, we didn’t have a wedding, we don’t follow gender roles (we just do what we are good at on an individual level not based on our gender), we are childfree, I work in a male-dominated tech job, I make most of the money, he does more of the cleaning, he cooks half the time, we don’t have a religion…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/25 06:54 PM
1

lol, but I never spoke of him in the past tense?? When you say you are married in English, you don’t say “I marry” to mean you are still married. I suppose it’s the wedding that happened in the past? Anyway we have a marriage far from any kind patriarchal standard, rest assured. I would never have tied myself to a man expecting me to be subservient, religious, or to follow “gender roles”. We are equal partners in the marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/25 05:36 PM
1

Strange assumption. I was obviously talking about why I married him, divorce wasn’t mentioned.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/25 04:24 PM
1

Huh? Nothing is implying we aren’t still married here. I married him in the past, and we still are. English doesn’t work the way you are suggesting where if you are still married you change the tense to “I will marry him”, that means you plan to do so, if you are already married you say “I married him”.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/25 04:19 PM
2

I’d say 25 or so it’s “weird”. But so what? A lot of people are weird. I’ve been weird my entire life, my parents raised me very unusually for an American. Nothing wrong with being weird. My husband never went on a date until he was 30, that’s weird, and he’s great.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/25 03:48 AM
4

I never wanted marriage, specifically. But I wanted a partner, and when I found one, it was worth it to me to get married to them because of the legal benefits. We didn’t get married for a 12 years, then we started needing some of those benefits and so did it. By then I trusted him a lot to like not run off with my money or other crazy things, we owned a house together and I had a lot of good experiences to trust him. I would never get married without being together awhile to gain trust.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/25 08:01 PM
2

I couldn’t tell you, maybe you have to go to a specific subreddit about weddings? I went to the courthouse in a t-shirt and shorts and the photos are all selfies we took together.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/25 08:46 AM
2

I always wanted an egalitarian relationship and it was very important to me. My husband and I split everything 50/50 for the first 12 years together. Then I started making a lot more and wanted to upgrade our lifestyle with that money, so started paying a much higher percent over time. We have always split chores 50/50 as well, or based on free time. Currently we pool all our money together and pay all the bills from it and everything is shared. Age difference wasn’t a big deal for me if it wasn…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/25 02:12 AM
2

Yep like I said I have liked bosses before. And also like I said, two people who hang out together for any reason, including work, can hit it off and fall in love. That’s just human interaction. I probably wouldn’t fall for a “bossy” boss or coworker as I don’t get on with that type of person well anyway. I have one male employee, he’s much older than me, no idea if he’s attracted to me, I don’t even know if he’s straight or gay, if he’s straight then it’s possible. Not sure why that would matte…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 11:04 PM
2

Sure, at that point the relationship changes. My relationship with my husband started as a classmate/coworker, then went to friend, then went to dating, then marriage. I have become friends with bosses before, and depending on the situation see no reason it couldn’t go from that to dating as well. When two people meet each other due to any reason, they can hit it off and want to get together. I don’t see how that means it’s being “bossed around” that is causing that to happen. If my husband was …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 09:44 PM
3

In my personal experience, none, but I am in an egalitarian marriage, so I didn’t marry one of these guys expecting to be my boss or expecting “submission”. I would never even think to compare my relationship with my husband to my relationship with my employees, it’s completely different. My husband is my lover, best friend, and life partner, we work together to make a nice life and we hang out together because we enjoy it. My employees are just people I pay to do work I need done for my busines…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 05:20 PM
5

Not really. They know much more about shipping product than I do, and I don’t tell them how to do their job. I only tell them about processes I need them to do for technical systems I’ve put in place, most of which I have confirmed with them it will work for their process before I even start. But they don’t “submit”, if I told them to do something that was wrong for our customers they just explain to me that they shouldn’t do that and why. I am paying them because they are good at their job and …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 06:35 AM
1

I am sure I did not make decisions the same as some of my ancestors, and yes due to technology. Like my husband has never been highly motivated to make a lot money, I didn’t care as I can make money with technology by making apps, and I can choose to not have kids at all which are a large expense. Whereas my mother didn’t really think she could do anything else and wanted to be a stay at home mom and have a man make money. Not sure that makes my husband a “bad boy” though. And honestly we picked…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 04:38 AM
14

Right? My boss expects me to not be if anything. Like she wants me to take charge, find the tasks that need doing, get shit done, and lead the younger members. I wonder what kind of job OP has that he has to be so submissive?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/25 05:49 AM
9

I’ve never had a job requiring me to be submissive?? My company pays my boss to manage people, so that’s what she does, they pay me to make software, so that’s what I do. I haven’t done any submitting, if anything it’s the opposite - they want me to take charge, create tasks that need done, and lead the lower experienced team members. I am also a boss for my own business, because I had capital to purchase the business and inventory. My employees don’t submit to me, we have an agreement where I u…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/25 04:45 AM
8

35 yo single man is better off than a 35 yo single female 35 single man: At the height of his career. Really? Not sure this is common. Men I know reaching the height of their career are around 45-50. What do you consider the “height”? Paid off all his debt. Totally not common, not in US. Most men haven’t even taken the huge amount of debt they will in their lives yet (most single men cannot buy a house by 35). Still good looking if he takes care of himself. Same as the woman. And most people don…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 06:34 AM
–

What do you mean? What people?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 05:37 AM
1

I just find the idea that millions of people see you makes to be humiliating in general, whether you have a great body or no. So being an actor is humiliating to you. I have a feeling people who enjoy acting don’t find it humiliating. That’s kind of just your personal thing, you don’t sound compatible to date people who enjoy acting. Also do you just not watch movies? It doesn’t sound fun to me to watch people get humiliated for 2 hours straight. I know it’s acting, but the kissing and boob suck…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 10:19 PM
–

My husband and I just don’t find rings comfortable.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 10:09 PM
1

I don’t get why that’s humiliating. Actresses are usually beautiful and have great boobs. And, uh… they don’t show the genitals in romantic scenes of movies I’ve seen. What movies are you talking about?? Well the parameters of a relationship are decided by the people in them, so if acting in a romantic scene is cheating to you then don’t date actresses who does romantic scenes. I don’t consider acting to be the same as doing something for real, so to me it’s not cheating. Like it’s not like a re…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 09:01 PM
2

Why though? Why would my relationship have or match the chore split of your relationship?? We prefer cook together, and take turns leading/assisting. We like it that way and you haven’t provided a single reason it shouldn’t be done how people in the actual relationship want it. We also don’t even wear rings so I certainly don’t agree it’s a man’s job to buy a ring, either. I obviously want him to lift things he can that I can’t, but it’s because he can, and I can’t. I also do things I can that h…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 06:31 AM
2

Well I guess I meant if I was an actress who wanted to do those scenes. I don’t even want to do any scenes personally so I’m putting myself in an actress shoes, seems like most have at least some romantic scenes (like kissing which you mentioned), and I don’t really see what is “humiliating” about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 06:08 AM
2

If I was an actress, I would only date people okay with me acting. Why would I date someone who had a problem with that if it was part of my job? This is like me as a software engineer dating an Amish man who was anti tech and had a problem with me using technology. It’s just incompatible people.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 02:52 AM
2

it makes me wonder why famous rich actresses agree to do something which would be very humiliating in any other context? I.e. appearing naked and having the whole world seeing it and seeing you have pretend sex. Why would it be humiliating? This seems to be an assumption to your whole question but I don’t really understand. I don't understand it, and if I was a woman, I would nEVER do it, and i would never let my wife do something like that. I would never be with a man who think he can “let” me …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 03:40 PM
6

I am married to someone who started as a friend, and I have dated other friends before, and I have also rejected friends who asked me out. I can tell you what the major difference was between the friends I wanted to sleep with and the friends I didn’t: they weren’t attractive, and I was not ever desperate enough to want to sleep with unattractive men. Like my husband weighed 180lbs when we got together. A friend I rejected looked like he weighed 400lbs. If you had two friends who wanted to fuck …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 05:15 PM
0

If you think hot women in impoverished countries willing to marry ugly men are not in it for money, I have a bridge to sell you…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/25 04:57 PM
2

I mean I am out of the pool too so it’s net equal minus one woman and minus one man. And he has never used a dating site or app in his life so not even sure he was really ever in the pool in question anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 04:26 PM
0

Exactly my point. Women here aren’t as willing to behave in the way passport guys want even for money.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 03:26 PM
1

Less men I don’t want doesn’t affect me in a negative way, it’s a positive. I already have a hot man, but even if I didn’t and was still using dating sites, less spam by the kinds of men I don’t like is a huge positive, there’s always way more men wanting to fuck than I even could, and less undesirable men in the pool makes it less work to filter them out. And most people know how to use birth control and abortions so “creating more single moms” is quite preventable, I’m not a mom at all and I’v…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 03:22 PM
1

Women got the vote in 1920 due to a majority vote to change the constitution, so not sure I agree with you that the majority disagreed with the cause of giving women the right to vote! I used it as an example as it was an example of someone in the past having an opinion that marriage wasn’t so amazing.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 03:56 AM
0

Their complaint is literally that they can’t easily buy women here, so they have to go to other countries to do it. If they actually could buy women without the inconvenience of going to another country they would be doing that rather than complaining they are unable to find any for purchase here.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 10:23 PM
3

I mean I am not seeking them out to say things to them. They seek women out (like in this post) and accuse women of being used up whores or whatever and how we will all regret it when they go seek a pure virgin willing to be a slave in some other country, then we reply like “gross”.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 10:21 PM
3

Women just think it’s pathetic and exploitive. We don’t want the unwanted men who have mail order brides or passport bro or whatever, so the idea we are upset we aren’t getting them or are jealous of some poor soul from a third world country is kind of delusional. It certainly does not lower my “SMV” for some dude I don’t like running to another country to buy a woman. Seriously how even would it affect me? I just feel sorry for the women in those countries and the state of the world that this k…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 09:23 PM
1

It’s a huge assumption Not for me it isn’t. I have known people from previous generations. My great grandma was born in 1906. And my grandmothers in 1920s. They told me how amazing it was I had so much choice in how I lived my life, how I made my own money. They told me how things were when they were young. My great grandma divorced in the 60s when it started to become easier to do. Like if we asked our grandmothers, or those of us whose parents are from traditional societies if we asked our mot…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/25 10:20 AM
–

Which rights are referring to that would “go back”? Women had some more rights in the 80s and 90s than they do now in US, although they do have some now that they didn’t before. For example, in the 80s and 90s all American women had the right to end their pregnancies, now they only have that in some states. But they didn’t have the right to marry other women or be free from rape from their husbands in all states before, now they all have those rights. So do you think things will change so they w…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 03:48 AM
12

When I have spontaneous desire it really is spontaneous, not in response to anything, including not in response to my partner “being attractive”. Like I’ll wake up at 2am super horny. Of course I go to my active sex partner when I get horny, I wouldn’t be with him if I didn’t want him! But the desire is truly spontaneous, not in response to him. Responsive desire is more when he does something really sweet that makes my heart flutter or touches me a lot giving me affection and making me feel thi…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 06:15 PM
12

When I’ve done competitive games I have found boys and men would underestimate me because of my gender, which was to my advantage as they don’t try as hard then. I’ve accepted help from men that I don’t believe would be offered it to me if I was a man.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/25 07:22 AM
2

I’m so confused with your logic. Are you saying if a woman sleeps with a man once that means she has “feral attraction” to a guy. But if she sleeps with him more times and wants to continue sleeping with him in the future and even falls in love with him and possibly wants to have his babies… that means she’s not attracted to him??? Have you ever been in love? Especially in the beginning, that is more likely to be the “feral attraction” where you can’t keep your hands off each other and just thin…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/25 08:56 PM
1

doing freaky sex stuff like pegging and BDSM If he isn’t doing this with me we probably wouldn’t be in a relationship to begin with, regardless of if he did it before or not. I seek out sexually compatible men who want to do kinky things with me in bed. What they did or didn’t do before doesn’t satisfy me in my relationship now, I care how they are now with me. As to the getting with multiple women that’s fine, a lot of people do that when new to sex and then want to settle with one partner, so …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/25 05:16 PM
10

I have just always had a yearning for it. I remember as a kid I couldn’t wait to have my own man like my mom had my dad. She could snuggle with a man in bed every night, I couldn’t wait to be an adult and have that for myself. Once I was a teenager and actually experienced being in a relationship, I wanted it even more. I have never had the same level of intimacy with “close friends”. Really only girls will get very close with me without it becoming sexual, but then they are never as intimate as…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/25 04:48 PM
1

I literally just never recorded the “count” as it was happening, 20-25 years ago, so of course I don’t “remember” it now as I never had it remembered to begin with. How many friends did you eat lunch with from the ages of 18-23? Are you young? Maybe you don’t realize that things you never even thought to think of don’t exist in your head for recall for 20 years. No one asked me this until I was on this sub. Maybe if I had been asked when the sexual encounters were fresh in my memory I could have…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 04:50 PM
3

How much do women actually care about sexual compatibility? It’s very important for me. If I am going to only be getting sexually satisfied from one man, then I want sexual satisfaction from him. use sex as a bargaining chip to get commitment ("I don't do casual sex", "I only have sex with my bf", etc), Some women don’t like casual sex, just like some men don’t. Doesn’t mean it’s a “bargaining chip”. Maybe these women want the men who insist they would never want a woman who has casual sex? and …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 10:44 AM
2

The number isn’t even high, I just didn’t record it, and it’s been 2 decades since the number changed. My point was just when would someone even ask in order to be honest with an answer, I just don’t think most people ask. It’s like saying “be honest about the number of friends you’ve driven in your car”, and then the reply is “ok, but I’ve never even been asked that question…”
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 10:20 AM
2

My point is I had no incentive to keep a logbook of sexual encounters, and so didn’t. And no one ever asked, so even in hindsight, there was no need to keep a log book so I have no regrets. I don’t think it makes me narcissistic or entitled to not keep track of something like that, or to state the fact no one has ever asked so no one ever expected me to keep track either.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 11:51 PM
2

A cute face and shared interests mostly. And depends on what you mean by “first move”. Some of them I flirted with first. Some guys I asked out on a date but they said no, so all the men I dated they asked me out, but some I told them I liked them or flirted first.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 09:52 PM
5

Like I said, some people I just click with. They all had their own unique things I liked or found interesting, were cute, smart, and had some shared interests with me.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 07:06 PM
2

Okay, but I think a fat woman can check her weight number on a scale, so if someone does ask she could check, she doesn’t need to keep notes any time it changes. It’s obvious when a woman is fat, anyway, you wouldn’t need to ask her for a number lol. But curiously men I’ve met online have asked me my weight and rejected me for being fat, and I’m not even close, they just don’t understand what tall women weigh! (Guess they thought I photoshopped my pictures?) I’ve had men ask about my sexual hist…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 03:53 PM
3

Occasionally. Like 2 in High School (dated 1), 2-3 in college (dated 2 and am now married to one, we met at an internship but went to college together), 3-4 at work after that. Also did online dating and had a couple boyfriends from that before I met my spouse.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 03:46 PM
0

I’ve never had anyone even ask.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 07:25 AM
1

This is why a “count” is silly. I personally just didn’t keep count. And no one has ever asked for my “number”. Some people have asked “have you had sex before” or “when did you first start having sex” as the closest questions, I pretty much just counted my first experience with intercourse for that, although I think that’s subjective too, but I hadn’t really done any other kind of sex before that anyway. Other questions I have gotten are like “have you ever done <sex act> before”, which I could…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 07:25 AM
9

I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone at any of those locations you listed that I actually got to know in any way to know if I like them. I’ve mostly dated men I met at school and work. When we have common interests and they are attractive to me I am interested in dating them if I’m single. I haven’t been single for many years, but I’ve met an occasional man over the years I would have been interested in dating if I was. The counter to that is why do most men not do it for you when it comes to you …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/25 05:04 AM
10

Are you under the impression that a woman dressing conservatively prevents men from being attracted to them or giving sexual attention??? Are you suggesting that you harass women who are dressed a certain way, but leave conservative women alone, and you think all other men have that rule too? Or that you just aren’t attracted to women who dress conservatively and think all other men aren’t either?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/25 01:17 AM
3

What’s the reason straight women wear makeup and get plastic surgery? The reason I do anything is almost never because it’s something men want, they don’t really factor into most of my actions. Im not sure what other women’s reasons are, but personally, I got plastic surgery because I was unhappy with a body part and wanted it altered so I could be more comfortable with it. It had nothing to do with men at all. It’s a well known fact how much MOST men hate makeup and plastic surgery on women. Uh…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/25 12:00 AM
1

Not always. I’ve spent hours playing in other ways.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/25 03:02 PM
1

I never “offer sex” because it’s not something I have I can offer to another person. It’s an activity I do with someone. We both do it together, equally, because we both enjoy it.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/25 08:38 PM
1

At the end of the day, sex has VERY limited options. It all ultimately boils down to “penis in hole” at the end of the day. Lmao, this kind of thinking is exactly what I meant. The best sex I’ve ever had is with men who don’t think this - in other words are more creative and fun.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/25 08:08 AM
33

Maybe 2%. The average woman prefers an average size dick. Now men, maybe 90% are, men love and obsess about big dicks.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/25 09:58 AM
2

Both, but the relationships were not long or just at the beginning, when the sex is bad I tend to not want to have a relationship with them. More of it was when I was young and first dating, I didn’t really know what to look for as well or couldn’t filter out incompatibility as quick. One night stands did seem to be mostly bad, yeah, because even when I was having casual sex when the sex was good it wouldn’t just be for “one night”… Some of my casual sex partners were quite good, but the best is…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/25 07:24 AM
6

I think there is often pressure on women to not come off as too sexual or too active when it comes to sex. I’ve had men complain to me that I am too “direct” in our sexual encounters, and apparently that’s not sexy (although some men love it). We see sex in movies as the man on top usually, and we hear about “men bad at sex” so get the idea it’s men’s job. I’ve also heard men say what you are saying, that women expect men to read their minds - and I had a problem when I first started having sex …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/25 02:24 AM
10

Yeah, I agree. Men tend to find “bad sex” still alright, they still cum even. But bad sex for women often means no orgasms at all, and can even be quite painful.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/25 12:33 AM
31

I saw other women mention this too - some guys are convinced if their ex likes it, all women do. And maybe we just don’t know it yet, or worse, that we have to “push through the pain” and then it will be good. Wtf?!
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/25 11:54 PM
7

Yes. It’s like anything really, like what is a good teacher - the ones who pay no attention, are only halfway present, don’t give a fuck about anything, don’t try to learn how to improve, and don’t put in effort - or the teacher who is really passionate about their work, pays full attention to you, cares what you think, spends time learning on how to be better, and puts in extra effort? So it’s not just sex, these same qualities can make you better than others at your job or school.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/25 11:51 PM
113

For me this has been true. It is absolutely not about dick size, it’s more about whether the man even cares to try or not and actually wants to learn and pay attention, as well as having some creativity for things to try. Sometimes it might just be a lack of practice and they will get better. And I think this is not just men, btw, from what men have told me I kind of think lots of girls are also not great at sex. People from cultures that have a lot of repression also seem to have problems as th…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/25 11:36 PM
7

I don’t understand because it’s well known the porn industry is very exploitive to women. Okay, so NOT “pro feminist” then… I don’t like paying for porn as a result because I want the money to go to the performer. If I pay for porn for a onlyfans girl that money goes to her. Only a small amount of it, just like if you pay for any other porn. The way porn industry works is guys run it and pay the women in the videos for just that video. Yep, and onlyfans works similarly, guys run onlyfans and pay…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/25 04:12 AM
1

Of course it can - things like plastic surgery, personal trainers, and tailored clothes cost money, and can definitely increase actual attractiveness. Careers bring money, that’s the cool thing about them.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 05:48 PM
3

I would rather just adopt if he doesn’t want our biological children. And also some of my opinion on this would be which characteristics of mine he didn’t like, and why he thinks his characteristics are so much better and more worthwhile of reproducing, it sounds like some kind eugenics, and likely racist. Depending on the answers to this I might not want to be with him at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/25 06:05 PM
1

Sorry, that wasn’t clear - I meant most casual sex that is had is by single people, and only why they are single and then they stop so it’s not a lifelong thing, not that most people have casual sex. I believe most people just have relationship sex and casual sex is less common. I really doubt most men who are having sex with someone they love would not rather be fucking a stranger (and having to find a new person every time they are horny instead of having someone in their bed already). Sex wit…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/25 09:53 PM
1

Would you date a man who uses marijuana at least once a month? Yes, as long as it wasn’t causing him problems. Would you date a man who considers himself to be a devout christian? No. Would you date a man who dislikes physical exercise? Probably not, I prefer more fit men and I enjoy hiking and kayaking. Would you date a man who doesn't believe that gay marriage should be legal? No. Would you date a man who believes that abortion should be illegal? No. Would you date a man who watches porn at le…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/25 03:15 AM
0

Yep, like I said, there is no “should”, and finding compatible dating partners is possible. I agree dates should just be split or alternate, and have always offered to pay my share for all dates I was invited too. But I have found many people want to do the etiquette they were taught - which just applies to the first date, not “all dates”.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/25 03:24 AM
9

When women are asked what they would do if they woke up in a man's body, they will usually never say anything like working longer hours at more dangerous jobs or physically defending strangers (women) or being a father. You think it’s women that want men to work dangerous jobs??? Usually it’s the men who want to do it, because it gets danger pay, women often are trying to get their men to take less risks, not more. Also most women want their men home with them more, not working longer hours, aga…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/25 02:51 AM
-3

There might be a few reasons he wants to pay. I don’t think he “should” if he doesn’t want to. But many men want to pay because social etiquette says the one who does the asking pays the first date, so he might be a polite man and offer to pay if he did the asking. Maybe the woman is a polite woman too and she will then pay for the second date. Of course once in a relationship you can just take turns or split it. I even know married couples who keep their money separate and split every check. Th…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/25 02:38 AM
10

Whether “most men” are not safe to be around probably depends on the location. I wouldn’t feel safe around most men in a Taliban nation, for example, but in Seattle most men are probably safe. I do believe misogyny is quite common and probably the majority (>50%) of men have misogynistic beliefs, but again, location can filter it somewhat. But the proportion is only part of the equation - it only takes one to get hurt. Even in a very safe location, I’ve had men drug me, try to assault me, and st…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 06:58 PM
2

You think I should live off a man’s average income even if I worked hard to get an above average income myself?? The whole point of me working to make a good life for myself is so I can have that lifestyle lmao. All the more reason I wouldn’t do your method and that egalitarianism is superior. I’m currently living in a house we own together on an island with an ocean view, due to my hard work paying off. I was able to take risks in my career in part because he didn’t, because at least we had his…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/25 07:44 PM
5

Look where? I wasn’t dating to find an income, I was dating to find a romantic partner. It’s easier to use jobs for income than to date for income. And you didn’t address the fact that income isn’t static. Sure I could find an older man already in his career making 60k when I made 30k as a student, then when my career takes off and I make 150k, what then? Throughout my relationship there have been times my man made more and times I made more, luckily I wasn’t with him for his income so it didn’t…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/25 05:34 PM
3

Why do some women seek Egalitarian marriages instead of partial or full Financial dependence on a man? In the end I am the only one responsible for myself. I wanted a comfortable life and so worked to make it for myself. Waiting to find a man I could then be dependent on wouldn’t make much sense, instead I searched for someone who could be an equal partner to work towards shared goals together. If a woman can rely on a partner to cover most expenses, what drives the choice to split things equall…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/25 05:13 PM
1

Like I said, I have experienced it both online and off. Very ugly dudes have messaged me insane sexual messages on dating sites. I think you don’t realize how much confidence some guys have. Or maybe they don’t expect results and just enjoy sending the messages. Even on this very sub, where I have no intention of dating anyone, I have gotten messages from men and then when I get into the conversation they send me their unattractive pictures and ask if I want to come suck their dick.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/25 05:48 PM
1

Wow, really? So you think ugly old crack heads with no teeth telling young attractive women in the street they want to milk her udders works for them sometimes? I always just assumed these guys were nuts, or enjoyed making women uncomfortable. How come more guys don’t go trying that more if it works?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/25 04:28 PM
2

I wasn’t complaining. But in this case they were not saying my boobs were nice, they were saying they were with me despite of not having the nicest boobs (or despite me being so tall), because of my personality. I can tolerate that, I know my body isn’t perfect. (And I got surgery on my boobs eventually.) But then aside from the title the rest of the post is a whole other thing, I wouldn’t be in a relationship like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/25 04:23 PM
4

Yeah but they say they don’t desire them, not that they just couldn’t get them before. And they don’t typically date women with my body type because they don’t desire that. Not all men prefer big boobs. Anyway, it wasn’t just boobs, been told the same for my height (I’m tall) or my hair (I have wild hair). I’ve seen these boyfriends pick porn with petite women with small boobs, which just isn’t my body type at all. But I have a personality that tends to attract some dudes where they don’t mind I…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/25 05:48 PM
0

I’ve gotten messages like that from incredibly ugly guys. I’ve had ugly guys say things like that to me in person. I’m always shocked and wonder if it works for anyone. I don’t think the fact they do it is evidence it works, it certainly never has for me. Some men have a lot more confidence than you would think.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/25 05:41 PM
13

Do you actually talk to men about getting pegged when they aren’t in the mood on one night stands?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/25 05:25 PM
7

As to the title, I’ve had almost all my boyfriends tell me that, actually. Sometimes more specific like “I am usually into small boobs, but I just clicked with you”, and indeed their past girlfriends all had small boobs. That’s okay for me. But in the body of the post you change it up, like they don’t find me attractive, they just like what I do for them, that he is doing the bare minimum, that he doesn’t fulfill my needs. I wouldn’t be in a relationship like that, it doesn’t matter what he said…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/25 05:21 PM
9

It's interesting how women living in western countries have had some of the most privileged upbringings in the world thanks to the empathy of western men. Western women fought for the same privileges western men had, snd now we have a nice civilization. along with being treated extremely well in the dating, much better than they would be in third world countries Yes it is quite a bit nicer being able to go on a date and not get stoned to death for it. However, it would be nicer still to be treat…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/25 09:29 PM
9

Um, some places in the world would stone me to death. Don’t think I’m going to find a man there! Also plenty of places in US I would not be popular among men, like most guys in the Bible Belt do not want a nerdy girl who makes way more money than them and has no interest in cleaning up after them or having kids. I can’t think of a single man I know who had a house before having a girlfriend, that is not an actual requirement…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/25 06:22 PM
1

What do you mean by “offer”? I am not sure if I am just the weird one who has been in mixed gender friend groups forever or what, but unless you are sucking your friends dick I don’t see why the gender would make much difference. Both my partner and I do activities we enjoy with friends who also enjoy those activities, their gender never really even comes into it… And I don’t think anyone is “offering” anything except company.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/25 02:14 AM
2

But I haven’t noticed any effects at all that I can think of. So what effects did you mean? And how long does it take to see them? You said more than 7 years OP has, is it more than 20 too?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 04:54 PM
3

How much time does it take to see these effects? I last had casual sex 20 years ago and still haven’t noticed any STDs or pregnancies or any other effects from it…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 04:47 PM
7

My mom cries to me all the time that she has no friends, she misses her family that died, she regrets marrying my dad, and she’s lonely. Marriage doesn’t guarantee not feeling that way. She also wishes her life was like golden girls.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/25 05:36 PM
16

Where I live I’m as free as men are. Why would I want to be less free? Right, for centuries men have been insisting “tomorrow’s the day you’re gonna wish you were a slave just to not be alone!” and they’ve all been wrong, but you’re correct when you say it. I’d rather die fighting than willingly become a slave just because men have been complaining for centuries. Most men in first world countries don’t want women to be slaves either and will also fight to stop anyone who tries to enslave us. You…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/25 07:31 AM
24

Men have been telling women they would regret being feminists because they’d end up alone with their cats since the suffrage movement. It’s been generations already, I doubt it’s now finally “in decades”. It’s like how all those religious people who think the end of days will be in their lifetime, for thousands of years… I remember when I was young and men told me I would end up a sad lonely 40 year old if I tried to hold out for the kind of man I wanted, and that “in decades” all the women like…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/25 07:19 AM
5

That’s strange. Do they leave work and go pee somewhere else?? lol. Mine had tampons in there too, which everyone thought was great. No one had a problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/25 05:56 PM
5

I’ve had gender neutral bathrooms at some of my jobs and it was not an issue at all. There is no need for bathrooms to be gendered. I don’t really care if I was “close” to the last person who sat on the toilet or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/25 03:30 PM
5

What do you mean what would I want him to do? I don’t have desires for some kind of male robot who does what I command. I just want people to be themselves, and if we hit it off, great. My husband was a 30 year old virgin when we started dating. I don’t really know how he “handled his emotions” tbh. Presumably how anyone else handles their emotions? Exercise, therapy, a diary… 30 year olds should probably know how to handle their own emotions, being a virgin doesn’t change that. Same with all th…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/25 08:52 PM
1

I never once said consent to sex is consent to parenthood. I said each person can choose what to do with their own body parts and cells inside their body. No one is exempt. This is perfectly reasonable. You are the one claiming biology is so unfair to men because they don’t have eggs in their body, that we need to make some kind of laws to make it biology not have a “double standard”. You haven’t yet said what the law is that would fix this injustice to men. The fact you think that women having …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 09:07 AM
1

Women know that as well. But they still can abort a child despite knowing that pregnancy could happen. We can’t force women to do or not do abortion. Thus we can’t use the argument “you know where is sperm going”. Why not? Women know where their eggs are going, and can choose to expel it out of their body or not. Men know where their sperm is going and can choose to expel it or not. I don’t see why we can’t use that argument? Everyone is allowed to control their own body. Women know if they grow…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 05:59 PM
-3

Double standards in reproductive coercion apply when men don’t want responsibilities of a parent they have no say. But women who have no intention to be mothers can abort. A biological difference is not a double standard. Standards are ideas humans hold. We can’t change our thoughts and grant men the ability to be pregnant. Because body autonomy. That is not legally granted everywhere If there were no double standards abortion would be allowed only if women were raped or stealthed. Huh? Then men…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 12:34 PM
0

Reproductive coercion is wrong. Women’s body autonomy is a part of the problem. I think, we can mostly agree on supporting women’s rights for abortion, but there is a caveat. Women and feminists who dismiss/victim blame baby-trapped men use exactly same argumentation as prolifers who are against rights of women. “If you don’t want kid, you had to use rubber, now it is your fault”. Double standards are very irritating. How is it a double standard? If you don’t want a kid and don’t do anything abo…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 10:59 AM
4

I’m 42. I’m married, if I had to date again I’d probably be open to +/- 10 years. As to why, those are the age ranges of people I tend to make friends with and relate to I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 05:19 AM
7

What does that mean? I thought dating women was supposedly a huge expensive hassle for men? What’s convenient about being with someone you don’t like? Or marrying them, thus legally tying finances together? Do you mean when the women cook and clean for them it’s convenient? I always split those tasks fairly with men so it’s never been a concern that they are just with me for that.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/25 08:09 AM
7

Why would he be with me if he didn’t want to be? And how would I know? If he was telling me how he wished I was someone else I would be pretty upset about that. If he had a crush on someone else and was lying to me she was a friend that would be upsetting too. If he secretly wished he married Natalie Portman, I’d live.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/25 07:12 AM
5

I doubt I was my husband’s first crush, he was 30 when we got together. Why would being the “first” matter? Why would that mean I’m a “silver medal”? You think whoever someone saw first makes them the best at something??
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/25 02:41 AM
1

Your OP claims bigger is better to an extant of 10”, not the unlimited amount men apparently think. I’m saying thinking that is an example of how men are more obsessed with dick size than women because even the women who like big dicks think that’s insane.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 08:22 AM
2

My point is “big ones” usually means on the bigger end of average, and men are over here wanting to double their dick size. Lmao.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 07:45 AM
1

Women watch the porn available, but men make it for men as those are the most of the paying customers. Men are the ones thinking 10” is what most women want and wishing they had 12” dicks. That’s so much more extreme than most women preferring average +/- half an inch.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 07:23 AM
4

Yep. Liking big dicks, as in like 6” and more about the girth than length, and being so obsessed with them as to writing posts about it, talking about how girls prefer 10”, creating all the porn for men to have huge dicks, making up crazy stories about how big dicks permanently alter female bodies, etc, are pretty different.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 06:43 AM
3

I happen to like cervix stimulation so like men with long fingers or dicks or willing to use toys . 9-10” is absolutely insane. No idea where you are thinking that’s the upper limit where it starts to hurt. 7” starts hurting me, and like I said I like cervix stimulation… anything more than that just doesn’t get to go all the way in. Vaginas aren’t as long as you think they are. Men are way more obsessed with penis size than women. The reason women use things like “small dick” as insults is becau…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/25 11:25 PM
1

Why are mismatched libidos a problem if sex is not that important and you would rather be single than in a bad relationship? Because if he is asexual and I am highly sexual, then that would be a bad relationship for me as it wouldn’t be fulfilling for me in the ways I need it to be, and I’d rather be single than in a bad relationship. You both enjoy being around each other, get along well, love each other, make wholesome little gestures etc. But there is basically no sex because he is borderline…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/25 05:39 AM
3

As a millennial, I wouldn’t date someone who lived off their parents and didn’t know what they want. I’m not a teenager, I’m middle aged… and I don’t want to be meeting the parents everytime I go over for a sexy night, or be with someone who lives like a teenager. I don’t even understand how you would be confused about this.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/25 12:10 AM
1

Well you ask about $1 million first, and don’t mention $1 billion in those comments that I could see. What would the point of having $1 billion even be if I couldn’t even support my family or do anything good with it?? I’d still have to watch family members struggle while I have that? That’s terrible. And since I help my parents out, I would have to just stop just as I was getting rich, which sounds really cruel. My mother in law might lose her house because I’d have to shut down my and my husba…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/25 03:31 PM
2

$1 million is not enough to even quit working. You’re in the comments talking about “private jets” and “mansions” and “loads of money” lmao. In reality I’d be able to pay off my mortgage (and it’s not a mansion) and other debts and that’s it, and would obviously still have to work to cover the cost of living. It would be really dumb for me as I probably would have to pay more than half that amount to my husband if I divorced him, and what would happen with our business? So I’d be trading debt an…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/25 03:21 PM
1

I think it was to say it’s just as rare while dating to meet someone you could be friends with as it would be to meet someone who makes that? Except you are right that it’s not like people know anyways. Whereas it would be easy to determine if someone was nerdy, often they do wear shirts saying it or other obvious indicators. Hell, my husband and I met in college doing some pretty nerdy things, so it was fairly obvious we had common interests.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/25 04:45 AM
1

Why do you think none of that is possible??? Can you explain your reasoning? I know way more nerdy women than men who make 300k, and they aren’t hard to find. I do all these things with my husband. We love watching anime together, reading the same sci fi books, and playing co-op games together. We are each other’s best friend. You can be friends with your spouse…?? We also do “serious” things together, like buy a house, invest our money, and even start a business together. You haven’t really exp…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/25 03:58 AM
7

I don’t want this to sound like a full-throated defense of porn or anything, but I don’t think it’s fair that we demonize men, especially young men, for watching copious amounts of porn as if they really have a choice. Why don’t they have a choice? Who is forcing men to watch “copious amounts of porn”?? Buuuut...that leaves a large swath of men alone and horny. Why can’t they masturbate? Do you really think “copious amounts of porn” will help them with this??? what option(s) do they have when mo…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/25 03:12 AM
1

Most people I know are high earning couples. None of them did the woman take more time off work… wild you can claim it ALWAYS happens. Not sure if it’s just where you live or something, but where I am it almost never happens in professional couples. I can’t even think of a single high earning woman who took more time off than the maternity leave.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/25 03:58 PM
6

Dread what exactly? My husband and I are past child bearing age, getting this age just has us more convinced than ever it was the right decision.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 04:57 AM
7

Having a life partner is not remotely the same as hooking up. I fail to even understand your confusion, honestly… have you never been in love?? My husband and I chose not to have kids, but we both wanted a long term relationship. We fell in love, became each other’s next of kin and merged families. We partnered up together to tackle all life throws at you, and to plan for our future. We care for each other when we are sick, care for our family when they are in need, and support each other throug…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 02:42 AM
4

I feel like I’d be open to it if I clicked with someone and had chemistry. But I’ve known a few trans men and they haven’t been attractive to me, I guess not as masculine appearing as I’m into, even when they totally pass as men. Also I really like dick, not sure they would be into me if I wasn’t into pleasing them how they might want, or that we would really be sexually compatible, but I wouldn’t be against dating to find out if it was someone I was attracted to.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 11:16 PM
2

If she doesn’t take care of herself she isn’t going to look hot like how men like. Are you saying you get dates by picking up homeless women on the street corner? I don’t think that’s the norm. Most people have to provide for themselves to live. And most men like things like long healthy hair, which don’t happen without a woman providing for herself. Whether men bother to explicitly look for it or not doesn’t matter, it’s still a responsibility, which is what you asked about.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 02:35 PM
3

Women are not looking for that in a husband either. These are just normal adult responsibilities we get before even looking for a spouse. Everyone has to provide for themselves and their family.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 02:08 PM
2

It’s clear that men have the responsibility to protect provide make money. So my questions are, what responsibilities do women have to men? The same as men. Individual couples can also arrange their own expected responsibilities based on their individual situation and needs.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 06:39 AM
7

Depends on the reason. If he wants to wait until marriage, absolutely not, I’m not merging my life and finances before even knowing if we are sexually compatible. And if we were dating and there was not any sexual contact happening and he isn’t responsive to me (it’s unclear what you mean by “he’s never made a move”), I wouldn’t be asking for sex, I would consider it that we just don’t have sexual chemistry.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/25 06:39 PM
1

I said nothing about “pump and dumping”...?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/25 02:42 AM
19

What planet is this on? Women live life on easy mode. You have been endlessly spoiled and coddled from birth; Is there a rule all women have parents who spoiled them??? I suffered from child abuse, myself, until I ran away from home. the entirety of western society is built to spoil you, protect you, and shield you from any consequences of your own actions. No one helped me escape, in fact police would bring me back so it took a few tries - it was literally illegal for me to decide I didn’t want…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/25 03:41 AM
1

My favorite first date was the one with my husband. He took me to a nearby city for a day trip, we went to the zoo and then a huge bookstore, where we picked out some sci fi books. I think I liked it so much because it seemed to highlight that we enjoyed the same things, both liking animals and books and sci fi. He held my hand when walking, and it was electric. It was nearly 20 years ago and I still get butterfly feelings when I think about that day. We were already friends though, don’t think …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/25 04:55 PM
5

What do women even offer? Companionship, a teammate, a family, a co-earner, etc. Same things as men. Men are supposed to protect and provide for women. They are? Never had any man offer that to me or do those things. In modern sense this means give them attention, energy, and wealth. Both people in a relationship tend to give these things to each other. I don’t think it’s very common to have a relationship where the woman totally ignores the man, giving him no attention, while he gives her a bun…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/25 04:24 PM
4

Sure, one can make one’s 40s and 50s be great, but they’ll never be as great as the late teens and the 20s. Never??? Please. My teen years were terrible, probably the worst years of my life. My 40s have been the best years of my life thus far. I had nothing and no one in the beginning, and everything was a struggle. I worked hard to make a great life for myself and now I have everything I worked for.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/25 03:56 PM
6

Yep. Tipping doesn’t actually help customer service as much as employers just requiring good performance to have the job. But this seems scripted, tbh, I don’t think she’s a waitress.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/25 02:03 AM
10

Are you under the impression that in places where there isn’t tipping, everyone provides shitty customer service???
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/25 01:44 AM
–

I’ve never had one, but the smell is just terrible, like canned dog food, don’t think I could get a bite down.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/25 05:21 PM
1

Government DNA testing is already backed up multiple years just to test DNA for actual crimes. You think they will get to DNA testing no one even wants in a timely fashion? And pay for it?? Just get a test if you want or need one. Literally nothing is stopping you.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/25 05:17 PM
1

What? What would being blind have to do with anything? You’re saying I was rejected because they couldn’t see something? Sorry, I don’t really get what you are trying to say. Humans face rejection, it’s a part of life.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/25 08:30 PM
0

Being rejected is being rejected, whether it happens before or after sex. Having sex with a man who is doesn’t like you doesn’t really make a rejection feel any better. I have been rejected by men I was interested in for multiple reasons, and the majority of rejections happened with no sex involved.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/25 07:51 PM
2

Can’t imagine I would ever marry someone who I hadn’t already experienced a few months of hardship with to know they won’t bail over a small thing like that. The idea that I don’t “contribute equally” would never be true in my situation. For one, in my career when we get laid off (which is NOT “quitting your job”) we get 3-6 months severance, so I would still be bringing money in. Two, I would have money saved up or could borrow money to cover 3 months, or could easily do some contracting work t…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/25 06:45 PM
8

Yes. From what the younger women I know say, it sounds like they still have to face things like rejection (anyone dating faces this), being new to relationships and making mistakes, having trouble finding men who want the same things or have the same values, risks of men being rapists or stalkers, risks of pregnancy and STIs…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 02:59 AM
0

Your preferences are that you don’t care about her actual personality at all, she should be pretty and thin, and not talk much… I think what is off putting is not that it is “low preferences” but that it doesn’t much sound like you have a preference for a person at all. People generally want relationships to have compatible values, goals, interests, etc. Your preferences sound more like for a doll or something.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 02:55 AM
1

What I think is really happening here is women say this to rationalize their own unwillingness to date men they see as “beneath them.” They don’t like dating lower class men but don’t want to say it so they frame it in this weird and unproven way that pins it on the man. I am a successful woman and I associate with many others. This insecurity by men is extremely common, most of us have had this issue crop up. It has nothing to do with “unwillingness to date” these men, because the problem usual…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 05:01 AM
6

If you have actually decided one day to stop caring about consent, being verbally abusive, etc, then you really weren’t much of a good person. Also, becoming fit always gives you more options, it was probably that than the fact you decided to become a rapist or whatever makes you “not good” nowadays.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 09:55 AM
11

Do you actually have any evidence that “scrawny” or “low t” men are less likely to rape or be abusive? I just don’t think that’s true. I’m not sure why this idea persists here that the more attractive a man is the worse he will behave, it’s not based on reality at all. Some of the most abusive men I’ve encountered were short scrawny men. They were insecure, and that insecurity led them to lash out. I will never forget coming home to my apartment to see my roommate being dragged across the floor …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 02:55 AM
12

Sure. But no good reason he has to tell the mother if there is no evidence of any kind to suggest cheating. Anyone who cared about her feelings but wanted a test to confirm for sure would just do it quietly and not need to insult her about it. Address your anxiety on your own without destroying the relationship with no evidence of cheating. If it comes back negative, THEN you can tell her, if not, then hopefully you gain a bit of trust at that point so you don’t run your entire life with anxiety…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/25 09:20 PM
8

I would assume he was planning to have me sign my consent and then rape me as soon as he was on top of me. I would get away as fast as possible.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/25 12:29 AM
1

Both people get a trip to the zoo. Neither one is getting something from the other - it’s a shared experience. No one is giving anything to the other, neither one loses something they had to give to the other… The whole point is to just spend time together.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 10:45 PM
1

I love being best friends with my husband. It hasn’t meant him abandoning friends, it just means I am now in the friend group so I’m invited as well. The friend group has various people not participate in some activities based on if they enjoy it - I usually pass on the car shows, a few people always skip the camping, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 09:11 PM
3

“Giving” or “getting” sex makes no sense to me. Sex is an activity we are doing together. It’s like saying I was “getting a zoo” when I go to the zoo with someone. No, no one is giving or getting - we are “spending time at the zoo together”. I enjoy having sex with a romantic partner, I have never “given sex” to anyone or “gotten sex” from anyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 08:49 PM
–

it’s natural for someone not to care as much about their partner if they have tons of other options What?? Are you saying attractive people can’t love??? That’s absurd.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 04:27 PM
2

I only have sex if I want to sex, it’s never been about “giving access”, that just sounds gross to me. I am not totally sure what you mean by “trials and challenges” but I can’t recall anything like that ever being a part of my sex life. I suppose there are lots of different kinks out there, though. The question is, what does the boyfriend/husband material guy gain from you in the early stages of dating that should convince a guy to prefer it over being a hookup material? Why would I need to con…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 07:40 AM
–

What good does it do you if someone is attracted to you, but you’re an ex?? That means they aren’t with you anymore. You want people lusting after you without even knowing it or experiencing it? Like you get off thinking about your ex, imagining they are lusting after you while sleeping with another man? I mean whatever floats your boat, but no, I don’t understand that, and I imagine that more men would prefer to be having sex than masturbating to their ex.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 02:45 AM
–

Yeah, I worked really hard to get where I am, but I am negative a million dollars lol. It’s not really mine, it’s the banks, if I lose my job and can’t find another of the same salary, I won’t be able to keep the nice house (where I live), and the cheap one is in an area I hate where I have to have my car stolen immediately if I forget the club and hear gun shots at night. It’s actually a lot of anxiety, people get laid off at my job all the time, and getting another one of that salary might be …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 02:41 AM
–

Not really. Why would a man want to be considered “toxic”? And why would he want to be an ex?? I would assume most men who like a woman and want to be with her don’t want to be her ex.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 01:51 AM
–

$680k and $500k. I owe $800k of that and will be paying it off until I’m 70.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/25 01:45 AM
4

I once had a man who I worked with do something like this. It was kind of creepy, like he had made a whole relationship up in his mind. He confessed his love and “broke up” with me at the same time. That’s nuts, most people at least ask someone out first! A few months later a manager came and asked me if I had seen anything inappropriate with that guy, because apparently some other people had reported him and they were collecting more evidence to get rid of him. I turned over screenshots (that I…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/25 04:55 PM
1

If marriage has fidelity as a marital duty, then if it doesn’t have sex as a marital duty it’s a net scam to men and to people with higher libido. We don’t consider fidelity a “marital duty” - it’s just an agreement between us that we want to be monogamous because that’s what we both prefer. It’s somehow a chore or painful to not fuck other people. I have the higher libido and it doesn’t seem like any kind of scam to me - we both agree we want sexual exclusivity. We consider sex an important and…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/02/25 04:07 AM
1

Idk about that, considering we have prostitution. I said “most women”. You think most women are prostitutes?? Most women are actually disgusted at the thought of doing that. It’s a minority that want to do this. The incentive just has to be worth enough in this case provision, stability, etc. What does “stability” mean here? Most women know how to get provisions themselves, and in fact know it’s much better to NOT rely 100% on anyone else. Yes, but the idea of a stable family with a dutiful husb…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/25 06:25 AM
1

No idea. Maybe some women in some cultures feel immense pressure to marry someone, so they just do it as soon as they have a chance, rather than picking someone compatible. I think religious communities probably have a lot of that pressure, and they tend to marry younger before they realize it’s a bad idea (and the men are also young and apparently think it’s normal for women to be nauseated at the site of them). But in progressive communities like I was raised, women tend to marry men they actu…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 07:11 PM
-1

Most women wouldn’t even be willing to have sex with a man they aren’t attracted to. The thought nauseates most of us. I just don’t believe it’s that common for women to be pretending they are attracted to someone just to have half the bills paid, when a roommate would do that too and not require even having to see them naked.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 06:57 PM
2

Very few men are offering that, majority of women have to work and pay bills even if they have a man, it’s just some help in sharing bills. Women could get a roommate and accomplish the same thing, without having to sacrifice a good sex life. I don’t think most women who enjoy sex would give it up just for a roommate.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 05:24 PM
6

Women get pregnant and men don’t. Women also tend to get left doing more of the childcare. Women also tend to be less likely to still want sex when exhausted, I know I’ve seen most men seem to get bursts of energy just from horniness that I have never had. Also men tend to have a higher libido on average as it is. That doesn’t mean women don’t like sex just because they don’t always want it as often or don’t want it when they are exhausted from nursing their baby. Anyway plenty of women end up i…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 03:16 AM
4

Probably the same reasons there are so many women that happens to. No, it’s not because women purposely picked men bad in bed to extract their sperm, or whatever it is you think they are getting, which they think is worth never having good sex again just to get. A lot of times people get older and more out of shape so they aren’t as attractive anymore, or they stop doing the things their partner enjoys that builds the feelings of intimacy, or they have kids and are feeling exhausted, or things s…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 02:32 AM
2

That looks like a lot of comments saying attractiveness was the only qualifier for casual sex, which makes sense, that’s probably the qualifier for men when having casual sex too. But that isn’t related to anything I said at all?? Can you crop or highlight which “all these women” you are talking about who said they purposely forgot good sex to marry men they don’t like? And what it is they are getting making it “worth it” to never have good sex? Most women want a husband who is very good in bed,…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 02:22 AM
5

I doubt it’s common. Most women like sex and want a partner they love and desire who is good in bed. Not sure what we would even get out of pretending we liked someone if we actually didn’t, what would the incentive even be? Do you frequently date women you pretend to like in order to get bad sex you don’t enjoy for some reason??
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 01:40 AM
5

Why would women purposely forgo good sex for the rest of their lives if they enjoyed it? What exactly is it you think we are getting worth that?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 01:33 AM
4

How do you know what was in my vows?? I prefer if my partner doesn’t want to be with me, that he isn’t. We didn’t say anything in our vows that would mean we have to stay together even if we aren’t happy.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/25 05:12 PM
1

That’s not true, I clearly said eating dinner also. Both were the same benefits women get, my point was the “benefits” are the same. It’s really just a day to schedule a date on, something that should be happening anyway, not some major deal. Can you explain why you think dinner is a benefit to women but not to men? They aren’t absorbing calories? Do they benefit from dinner on other days, or is it just this one that they somehow can’t use?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/25 03:40 PM
1

My man and I have always used our joint account for dates. So I disagree with the premise “it’s always the man paying”. Lots of couples have joint accounts like this. Since marriage we share all the money, so we are both paying for any gifts or any restaurants we go to. I’m not saying women don’t buy men gifts in exchange but what I am saying is that if they didn’t a guy wouldn’t lose sleep over it and she knows that but if a guy chose to skip Valentine’s Day she’ll definitely remember that and …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/25 11:39 PM
10

Some people like huge boobs, which cause health problems. Some people like the underweight look, a clear indication of being unhealthy.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/25 11:21 PM
–

What?? Why would it mean that? I pay all the bills presently, my husband doesn’t “submit” to me. So I don’t think this “has to” happen at all, and see no logical connection to why it would.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 06:39 AM
–

Oh, that is even worse then, it means not splitting based on income earned but just living at what the man can afford 60% of, regardless of the actual situation?? I didn’t put all this effort into earning money just so I could hoard it away until my husband dies or something.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 04:12 AM
–

Even if I “agreed”, how exactly would one arrange such a thing?? I can’t just snap my fingers and have us earn a certain amount. Would I give income away to make sure it lines up 60/40?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 04:03 AM
8

To conservative men maybe, progressive men generally like that I am and even expect me to be responsible and manage the functionality of my uterus to not make any unplanned children. Not sure how “being responsible” is “taking no responsibility” to you, it’s weird backwards logic. And luckily I have not ever murdered any children, my own or anyone else’s, so it’s not really a concern if men aren’t into that, I would hope they aren’t, neither am I!
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/25 05:04 AM
8

It is not legal anywhere in US to kill children, so you are correct you don’t get to do that here, for sex frequency reasons or any others. Whether I change the chemistry of my own body to alter how my uterus functions is up to me, for any reason I want. No children are involved. Not sure why you are bringing up how often I have sex, that doesn’t seem relevant, children don’t somehow become involved in my medical decisions just by me having sex at some given frequency, and I should allowed to ma…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/25 04:58 AM
7

Murdering children is illegal and I have no desire to change that, nor have I seen any proposed laws by anyone in US to do so, so that’s just a false statement. How I manage my uterus and menstrual cycles, whether I allow eggs to develop in it, and medical decisions I make about myself and my reproductive system are all things conservatives don’t want to allow me to control, and they have made plenty of declarations expressing that.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/25 03:54 AM
17

Absolutely not. In US where I live, conservatives want to take my rights to my own body, to make medical decisions, and to divorce, and want to force everyone to be their religion, which I am not, and to take away the right of some of my friends to marry or to even exist. Many don’t think women should work, or only in certain fields. Why would I date someone who wants to make my life worse??
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/25 05:04 PM
5

So exactly what marriage benefit are you suggesting family courts give more of to women exactly? Custody disputes happen with or without marriage in US, marriage isn’t required and not marrying doesn’t protect from having to deal with that.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/25 07:51 AM
5

Alimony is pretty rare, so probably not, and neither will she. And yes, in my state 50/50 custody is the default. 50% of the house would also be common, one person may buy the other out or they sell. Anyway not a single thing you listed was a “benefit of marriage that only women have”. They were all about how to divide things up after divorce, or even just after a break up - custody agreements happen whether married or not, division of shared property would happen whether married or not. And non…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/25 07:48 AM
6

As far as I’m aware, my husband gets the exact same legal benefits I do... Which legal benefit are you thinking of that only applies to women?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/25 06:58 AM
2

Yes I’m absolutely saying it’s a viable option, most business owners aren’t successful their first attempt! Most 18 year olds who get married don’t succeed in that either! Yet you think that’s a viable option? It takes a few tries to work for yourself, just like learning anything new does. I am successful now (I actually have a job AND own a business), but I didn’t make a ton of money with my first business at 15. The cool thing about it is it doesn’t matter, you can try again! You can go get a …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/25 04:03 PM
2

I absolutely prefer contributing to society by working on a team to make something used by millions of people daily over scrubbing toilets and changing diapers just to make future workers/cogs. Even better is the fact I have a choice what I want to work on all day, if I don’t like it or am bored with it, I can get another job. You can’t just get rid of kids you are tired of and try something new. If wiping baby asses was really that much better than every other job available, men would be beggin…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/25 03:48 PM
2

I didn’t say anyone could succeed. I didn’t even say mine succeeded. I said if someone doesn’t want to be a “wage slave” that they have other options they could try, whereas before only men had that other option. Most people don’t mind just getting a job, so that’s what most people do. It doesn’t have to be a “startup”, either, just being self employed is easier, people do it all the time and there is so many easy options these days, like all the kinds of gig work, Etsy, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/25 03:39 PM
6

You said work women did for money was “restricted to certain kinds of work” in your argument for how women could avoid “wage slaving”. So sounded like you think this “certain kind of work” is excluded? Seamstress was a common job women were allowed to have.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/25 04:38 AM
9

Can you explain the “huge difference” between working for a man, and working for a man?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/25 04:36 AM
5

No one has a choice to find a way to get money if they want to live and especially if they want a family. Women are not and never were excluded from this. Finding a man to work for isn’t different than finding a man or woman to work for. I started my first business at 15. I don’t see why someone couldn’t do it at 18 if they wanted to. Just take something you can make and sell it. Humans have been doing it for thousands of years.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/25 04:34 AM
10

Most people have to do some work to survive. Most women never had a choice of being a “slave” for money or not, everyone has to be, because food and shelter cost money. Being a slave for a husband who is a slave for a business owner, or being a slave for a business owner isn’t that different. But having the choice of what you get to do as a job is nice. And having the option of being the business owner is a pretty big deal.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/25 04:19 AM
10

So if I code as a woman, that’s being a “wage slave”, but if I was sewing, that wouldn’t be?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/25 04:12 AM
6

I took an option of owning a business rather than “wage slave”, being legally allowed to own a business as a woman obviously helps with that. So I think other women could choose that as well, much more so now than ever before. You are saying if a woman “wants a family” that means she should find a husband willing to be a “wage slave”, but that doesn’t seem very fair to me. What if a man “doesn’t want to be a cog and wants a family”?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/25 04:11 AM
7

But they are so expensive. Pulling out isn’t even that hard and would still result in just a small chance for pregnancy (and almost no chance when a man is not young). I have a hard time believing someone is paying $800/mo for an abortion every menstrual cycle rather than just pulling out for free or using birth control that is like $20/mo. I mean, I guess there are lots of dumb people out there, but surely this is extremely rare, a few whack jobs out of billions doesn’t really make it a “thing …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/25 03:57 PM
11

I’ve had men straight up tell me. Like, “Oh actually I have a girlfriend, I just really wanted to smash so said you could be my girlfriend”.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/25 05:43 AM
–

Why do you think women never think twice about our desire?? Most of us absolutely think twice and then some about sexual desires. And suppress it to go to school and work and everything else. You mention that since puberty men have to suppress it. Well, women don’t actually have to wait until puberty to experience a climax, and so I have been suppressing my sexual desire since I was around 6, when I first discovered orgasms.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/25 04:29 PM
20

Most women don’t, either. And yet the argument many men here give is if she ever did it with another guy, she should be doing it with her current one, even if she doesn’t want anything inserted in her ass.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 02:00 AM
17

Do you really think that the rights and freedoms you hold would not be challenged by some enemy that doesn’t hold them? What does that have to do with whether I pick a man out of desperation or actually liking him? Are you saying enemies never attack countries where women don’t have freedom? No one ever attacks places like Afghanistan or Iran? When there is an attack but you don’t have people of your same beliefs to defend you and your ideas, would you be ok? and say we did all we could. I don’t…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 04:44 PM
1

Why won’t your man stimulate your clit during sex? There are also some toys you guys could try that stimulate your clit during penetration.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/25 04:14 PM
2

Can you explain this to me and why even in a situation where a man is clearly in love with a woman, it is still considered that he just “wanted to get into her pants”? I’ve had a few men I was friends either confess their interest in me over the years, including my husband. It’s just not true that ANYTIME this happens everyone assumes they just wanted sex. What is true is many many men really do just want sex, and don’t like a woman much (sometimes don’t like any women much), but will pretend to…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/25 05:39 PM
2

Ok but what if half the time it’s one person and the other half it’s the other person? Who is the leader then?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/25 06:09 AM
13

There is NO third option where you are both perfectly equal, and in reality does not exist either. What do you mean in reality it doesn’t exist? “Equal” meaning what? Like, sure my man is better at some things and I’m better at others. We treat each other as equals because we have agreed to a partnership and don’t believe either one of us is superior than the other. You are claiming it’s false and one of us IS superior? How are you judging this? The way we see it we both have an equal status in …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/25 09:43 PM
9

No. The gender pay gap is small.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/25 04:56 PM
–

The one implicit standard I find really strange is to want an objectively highly attractive person and want to be treated with a deep love. Generally those people have a lot of options so you won’t be treated that well since you’re a statistic to them Are you saying attractive people can’t love?? Give me a break.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/25 04:55 PM
11

Why does someone need to make sacrifices for a relationship, especially with no kids?? I don’t think my partner or I have sacrificed anything. What kind of sacrifices are you expecting?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/25 04:06 AM
–

If she’s telling him she is in love with someone else, or loved someone else more, or something like that… he should leave her. I don’t really get what you think “husband material” is “paying” exactly. But if you feel like you have to “pay” for love or affection that doesn’t sound right either and you should probably look for someone that it doesn’t feel like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 04:51 PM
–

How on earth would he know how “passionate” she was with someone else??
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 04:06 PM
4

So? That doesn’t make not having children somehow be neglecting children. You can’t neglect children that don’t exist. Of course the way women prevent creating children is different than the way men prevent creating children, because our reproductive systems are entirely different. Biology being different doesn’t change the definition of “abandoning and neglecting children”. Nor does it mean doing the responsible thing and using the technology you have available to you to control your own reprod…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/25 10:40 PM
9

Getting an abortion is not “dodging responsibility”, it’s literally doing the responsible thing and fixing a mistake before it balloons into a major problem. Not having children is not “abandoning or neglecting children”…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/25 09:16 PM
2

My husband and I have college degrees and have white collar jobs. I work in tech, I make enough money now (not childbearing years anymore) to be a sole earner, but he never has. He’s a hard worker and yet never was able to make enough to afford a whole family on his own, what exactly is so “easy” about it? A college degree is not at all a guarantee you can afford to be the sole earner for an entire family. Everyone I know with a college degree and children has both parents working so they can af…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/25 09:26 PM
3

You claim it’s “easier” but never mention how on earth it could be easier to get a job that can afford a whole family as the sole earner. I don’t think that’s that easy at all, I say that as someone who can only just now, in my 40s, afford such a thing… It’s FAR easier to find two jobs that can collectively afford that than a single one, especially in the age window people generally want to have kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/25 07:15 PM
21

Have you ever been penetrated against your will?? Have you ever had someone use your body to create a whole new human life inside you against your will and worried if you could or should end that new life? Rape IS different from other kinds of assault. It just is.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/01/25 07:22 PM
10

For women they are too! No one has to get married if they don’t think they have any incentive to do so. But I don’t see how it’s gendered. For my marriage we get a sizable tax break by merging our money, but we both would lose half of the merged money if we divorced. But even before we were married we owned a house together, so the risk would have been there even without marrying. It’s the merging assets that is risky, and it is risky to anyone doing it, it’s not gendered. I didn’t get any magic…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/01/25 04:52 AM
25

Why “especially for men”? Is there something you think women only are getting out of a relationship? My man and I each get a partnership in life. We can get more done together than alone. For example, we bought our first house together and neither could have done it alone. It’s also just enjoyable to have a solid companion over the years… we like each other and enjoy being together. We get some legal benefits with marriage, like a tax break when merging incomes, family health insurance from empl…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/01/25 03:04 AM
1

Some women will claim that to go out and have alot of sex with alot different men, experiment etc. is liberation and perfectly fine. But then some of these same women will also act like a man so much as talking to, looking at or touching them the wrong way is a violation of their sacred chastity. It’s not about “chastity”, it’s about consent. I want to be touched only by people I have consented to touching me. That’s not contradictory in any way.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/24 06:38 PM
1

Lust is sexual desire. It isn’t rooted in warm feelings for a special person, it is more of a general attraction for a type of human (sexual orientation). One could say it’s impersonal. Why do you declare this as a universal experience of lust? I have never in my life felt lust in an impersonal way, or for someone I don’t know at least a little. Maybe not everyone experiences it the same as you? For me lust feels like a strong sexual desire for a specific person. When I’m in love with someone, m…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/24 10:12 PM
6

I think average sized boobs are not concealed in a t-shirt. More than half of the women on the planet have boobs average size or bigger.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/24 01:57 AM
7

I just wanted an example of clothing that results in men not sexualizing breasts, because the post was clearly assuming it is a thing, but I think it doesn’t exist. That’s not about me, it’s about anyone with boobs men like, and relevant to the post that was clearly assuming it exists and women are choosing to wear something that isn’t that. You claim a t-shirt does it - I’m saying it certainly does not, men absolutely sexualize boobs even in t-shirts. Not just me, ask any women with boobs men h…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/12/24 10:01 PM
6

I really don’t think my experience of having boobs and men sexualizing them is unique! You think my boobs are the only boobs in the world men like? Lmao. They aren’t even that amazing as far as boobs come, they just aren’t small, but a ton of women have big boobs, it’s not unique.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/12/24 09:38 PM
7

I wear jeans and a tshirt pretty much every day. I assure you, it does NOT prevent men from looking at me sexually or sexualizing my breasts. Perhaps I’m not wearing the right fit though? Where would I find these “clothes that fit” but aren’t form fitting around the boobs? Even the baggiest of t-shirts would just hang off my boobs, and then look like a huge tent everywhere else (and would be “clothes that don’t fit” not ones that do!). Plus if it’s too big of a size it won’t even stay on the sho…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/12/24 07:01 PM
7

Comparing how Women view Straight Men to how Straight Men view Gay Men is an Incorrect Comparison. There is this idea that Straight Women view Straight Men similar to how Straight Men view Gay Men. You are misunderstanding. We view straight male harassers the same way as men might view gay male harassers. However this comparison is Incorrect. First as a Straight Male I am not attracted to Men at all. Is this implying that Women do not find Men Attractive at all? If you fix your subset from “stra…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/12/24 06:41 AM
7

Most guys also enjoy it more if it’s not just their penis entering a vagina but never touching another part of the woman. Men complain about things like “starfish sex” but usually if a woman is getting orgasms, she is gonna be squirmy and excited, not laying there like a dead fish. I have heard some women don’t cum from PIV but also insist on doing nothing else, at that point it’s probably bad for both people. Anytime someone has a lot of sexual hang ups and doesn’t want to try anything it is no…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/12/24 08:57 PM
7

And let’s stop pretending women don’t know how society will react to revealing clothing. It’s not shocking. It’s not some grand mystery. If you wear something provocative in a world where breasts are sexualized, people will treat it that way. So you are saying there is non “provocative” clothing that will result in people not treating it that way? Can you please share a link to this cool clothing that people won’t sexualize breasts in??
/r/PurplePillDebate24/12/24 07:18 PM
–

at most a bachelor’s gets you 20 dollars an hour What??? That’s minimum wage in my city… I’m in a field that generally requires a bachelor’s, starting positions are more like $75/hr, not 20!
/r/PurplePillDebate24/12/24 04:21 PM
–

Your link didn’t say only women can use those and that men aren’t allowed to. In fact the very first sentence explicitly says “where people (typically mothers) can leave babies”, meaning it’s not always mothers. I do support the right of men to use the same public services for newborns that women have. These boxes are typically used for babies in which the father has already abandoned them, otherwise the father would have the baby and it wouldn’t be in a box. When these boxes are used, the fathe…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/24 03:07 AM
–

Where does that happen that men automatically assume legal and fiscal responsibility at the point of conception? In US at least, men are not responsible for anything legally or financially until the child legally exists. They don’t have to pay for any of the pregnancy related costs or anything, and they don’t have any legal responsibility of the fetus. Once a child exists, both parents who contributed their DNA are responsible for it. Until then, the only options to both are controlling their ow…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/24 02:00 AM
1

Some men were suggesting a pre-feminist ‘arranged marriage’ type of thing. Okay, so that’s a no on security. What does this even have to do with security?? Women and girls aren’t actually feeling very secure in areas their parents marry them off to someone they don’t love. I don’t think it should be legal to choose a partner for someone else. Let’s try liberation then. I talked to a woman via DM over on ARAD who’s been fucking her friend’s 50-something dad since she was 16 (she’s now 23). She li…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/24 04:11 AM
0

How? I’ve explained multiple time. All the same ways you said the gov would be involved with divorce, if you do those things with someone but don’t get married, they can still sue you, thus involving a court. How is this even an argument in support of marriage? It’s not. I don’t care if you get married or not. It’s an argument pointing out your flawed thinking - that not marrying will protect you from the government being involved in your relationship. My point is that is totally false - people …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 04:54 PM
1

It’s idiotic to want legal benefits from objectively corrupt institutions like government. You get the “benefits” in exchange for getting them involved in your relationship. They would be involved anyway. Anyone can sue, divorce isn’t the only suing you can have happen. Not marrying someone won’t prevent them from suing you for the same reasons they would if needing a divorce. Some people’s jobs also do that. Right, I have a great job and it gives my husband health insurance. But not if he isn’t…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 12:27 PM
1

If two people genuinely love each other (which is very rare), they wont feel the need to get married. How does loving each other prevent the need for any legal benefits? Love doesn’t give my husband health insurance, but marriage did. Are you saying we should pay thousands of dollars more than we need to because we love each other? Them loving each other would be enough “Enough” for what? Since we were planning on being together many years, we wanted the legal benefits, love doesn’t get us any o…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 11:34 AM
9

Make the rich people support the elderly population, rather than young people, so we don’t require infinite population growth. Also it should be that robots and AI doing more work has everyone working less, and have more time for having a family. We would need to change how some of our economy is functioning where it requires every family have 80+ working hours a week just to survive. Maybe a universal income funded by taxes on companies. Right now we literally have unions forcing companies to n…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/24 08:47 PM
–

I guess the same way you would expect women to ever take you serious? Personally I’ve never had any problem with men not understanding that people can have sex when single and dating and also have relationships, because they usually do both those things as well and consider it pretty normal.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/24 01:44 AM
1

Lots of people won’t date vegans, trust me. It’s probably a bigger filter than sleeping with 3 more people than average, the second of which no one has ever even asked me about. Perhaps it’s regional, if everyone you know marries their first boyfriend or girlfriend, that is probably unusual in my area, where it’s considered pretty normal to have an average amount of sex partners before finding a partner, and 10 is much closer to the average of 7 than 1, seems like your area is not very represent…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/24 04:56 AM
1

And what would you expect to be different due to that? Your question is so weird. I didn’t eat meat with any men, is my life the opposite end of the spectrum? What’s life like when you eat animals with so many people? Do you still have a family and friends?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/24 12:55 AM
6

You said “slept with 10-15 people in their 20s”… that’s not the other end of the spectrum. I did that in my teens and 20s, and have also been in long term relationships most of my adult life. Actually I’ve been in the same long term relationship most of my adult life - since I was 23, and I’m 41 now. I had casual sex during times I didn’t have a boyfriend, it’s not like you have to choose casual sex forever and never accept a second date if you sleep with someone once.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/12/24 06:35 PM
18

What actually happens to women later in life who slept with 10-15+ people in their 20s regarding social perception, friend circles, romantic life, and family life? Well I did that in my teens and 20s. I am in my 40s now. I don’t think my life now has any relation to me having sex two decades ago, and I’m not sure what you mean by “what happens” but I can describe my life somewhat…. I have been with my husband 18 years, my friend circle is comprised mostly of friends from college and work. Many o…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/12/24 06:26 PM
7

Ask how he can think that while knowing me and our group of friends. Like is he suggesting I have a job due to “pro-female DEI”?? Is he saying my “modern feminism” is “too far”, and if so, in what way exactly? I’d generally ask a lot of questions. Questions can usually reveal the holes in logic, and lets them be revealed by himself, so he would believe it more when he thinks he came to the conclusion, rather than me saying it. I’ve had a couple male friends who expressed some manosphere stuff to…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/24 04:38 PM
–

As a Woman, If You Want a Man to Commit, Maybe Commit to Cooking and Cleaning Why, though? I wouldn’t want a man who wants me as a maid. I prefer to have a man who is my best friend, who wants to be with me because he likes me. Alright, ladies, I’m just going to say it: if we want men to be loyal, stable, and ready to commit, we have to ask ourselves—what are we bringing to the table? I contribute to our joint lives as much as a man would. Not sure why I would have to also be a maid. He can hire…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/12/24 04:14 PM
4

“Tasked with” by who? If I am president, I would delegate this task I apparently made myself but for some reason has weird rules, my assistant can route this to the correct people for a proper research group and can return with the answers.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/24 02:14 AM
0

I like shy men, I think it’s cute. My husband is pretty shy. But if a man is too shy to ask me out, I probably wouldn’t even know he is into me and nothing would come of it. My husband and I were friends first, so I guess at that point he felt more comfortable with me and was able to ask me out.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/24 07:36 AM
0

No. I like money because it can get me things I want, allow me to live where I want, and I can afford to do fun things I want, so I have been quite motivated to earn it. But I have never felt sexually aroused by it.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/24 03:51 AM
6

What?? You didn’t ask any of that. You asked why we adhere to beauty standards on media, that are all made by men. My answer is because whose beauty standards would we follow otherwise??? I am following the beauty standards of our culture, and not even checking who came up with the original idea. Most women are not getting surgery, they just dress and style and groom themselves as to the popular standards. We aren’t even allowed to just “wear our own skin” in US, clothing is required.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/24 05:10 PM
4

So you think women who hate men should not follow the standards of beauty of the country they live in to have a normal life, and should find a job out of sight that doesn’t care about those standards?? And my question at first was about my job, not “a” job. My point was to show you why people follow cultural beauty and looks standards, and that it was pretty irrelevant whose idea some standard originated with.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/24 04:51 PM
3

Okay so you think you would still get the job as a server and get the exact same tips if you showed up like this? https://images.app.goo.gl/VfQKFheYPopiM5n17
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/24 04:04 PM
1

Does feminine and masculine exist in your mind? I mean I guess both do, sure, I tend to score like 50/50 on those online tests about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/24 06:17 AM
18

Look, I don’t hate men… but what beauty standards are you suggesting women who do adhere to instead?? I literally just dress as appropriate for the culture I’m in, I’m not really thinking about where beauty standards originated. Who even cares where they originated? Most people don’t want to look like a weirdo, we want to fit in with our society. If I dressed in the culture of some obscure lesbian tribe with totally different standards of beauty rather than an American, would I still get hired o…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/24 06:13 AM
2

I said nothing about having it easy. I’m saying men may not have get easy casual sex, but that isn’t the only thing in the world. There are things they do get that women don’t. Right now I’m in a ton of pain due to cramps and painful boobs purely due to being female, something I have to experience nearly every 3 weeks, so maybe I’m not so sympathetic to the idea that men have it so terrible because they “don’t get to hookup a ton”.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/24 10:06 AM
2

Eh, I certainly think he is attractive, but it’s likely just chances with low numbers. He has asked out two women and they both said yes. It was people he knew, not cold approaches, which can also increase chances. We were friends for a few years already when he asked me out, and we had been growing closer recently at the time, it was apparent there was chemistry.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/24 07:39 AM
3

I see. Well that’s not how it happened at all. In fact, the times my man asked someone out they said yes, he just didn’t do it much, for some reason the last time he did before me was many years.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/24 06:54 AM
1

He is older than me and had many more life experiences than me. Not having a bunch of casual sex is not really the only experiences in life. I didn’t have a “full range of options”, only a small subset of men are interested in me. I don’t know what you mean “until it’s time for serious dating”. My man didn’t date much until he asked someone out - it was him to who decided he wanted to ask, so I guess he felt “it was time for serious dating”? He was free to ask women out any time before, and I do…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/24 06:33 AM
1

My man isn’t traditionally masculine, he also succeeded in finding me as much as I succeeded in finding him. I’m not sure what you mean “experiencing the full range of lifestyles”. Men asked me out because of my body and they wanted to have sex with me, but really only certain kinds of men actually wanted to date me. I know many men here are jealous women have men wanting to masturbate with our bodies, but it’s really not all that. I had some casual sex when young and learned I wasn’t really int…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/24 05:59 AM
7

I feel like women can be a lot more and not “get their femininity questioned”. Especially in a post women’s liberation world. As a woman who has never fit into our culture’s box for “femininity”, I disagree. I’ve been getting shit for not fitting it since I was a little kid. However, the view on men and the traditional masculine role has not changed. People still say stuff, “Oh you’re just not man enough for that.” I have never heard the opposite of that. Probably because you aren’t a woman? I’v…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/24 04:24 AM
3

I’m all for people starting businesses and taking control of their own destiny, you should certainly try it. And I feel you about having options in the capitalist world, I don’t know I would choose capitalism as an economy if I had the choice, but I live in a capitalist world, and thus have competed in that to get myself the best options I could. I work for a huge corporation and own a small business and have a working partner - gives me lots of options.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/24 05:47 AM
8

I see. Not gonna help me, not only did I start the business after marriage, my husband owns 49% of the business outright lol. Of course you can reinvest the money back to the business with expenses to not have profit, but then you also don’t have profit to spend on personal things like housing… Sometimes people trying to win some battle with the ex end up cutting off the nose to spite the face. My husband’s ex employer basically tanked the business to be making minimum money so he wouldn’t have …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/24 05:35 AM
10

Great idea. Not sure what it has to do with women, but any gender who is smart and hard working could consider it. My husband and I recently purchased a business from a family member, it’s a LOT of work. Alimony is rare these days and generally avoidable by getting with an equally hard working partner. I’m not sure how having a business would prevent it though, I know a couple people who have to give half their business profits to their ex spouse. It’s better to just get have a working spouse an…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/24 05:08 AM
4

I know for my relationship the consequences to either of us leaving would be the same. We’d have to sell the house or buy the other one out on their half, we’d have to decide if we could still run our business together which would be a huge consequence, we’d have the social consequences with our families (his family is also mine now, it would be really hard to lose a whole family), we would lose the cost savings of living in one household… And I sure don’t see how a DM from a rando would be any …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/24 03:39 AM
5

Men can want whatever they want. They may not find anyone to fulfill their desire though. Personally, I have no interest in being a “mother” to an adult man that isn’t my actual child, nor would I want him to be my “father”, I already have a dad. I also wouldn’t desire sex with someone I’m a mothering, it’s probably ingrained to not sexually desire people you are parenting, so mothering anyone is an immediate sexual desire killer for most people. I also have zero interest in being a whore or in …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/24 12:16 AM
1

The same benefits that I get from male friends… Someone to play games with, hike with, see movies with, talk with, go out to eat with, go to events with, etc. We also watch each other’s pets, assist each other with anything. Female friends seem more likely to give handmade gifts and discuss relationships and sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/24 01:48 AM
8

Let’s say that you’ve been dating a guy for a while and you’re planning on getting married soon. He’s pretty reserved with you regarding intimacy, affection, and romance in general. He gives you light kisses sometimes, but never any intense make-out sessions or anything like that. He’ll cuddle you if you ask for it, but he’s generally not a huge fan. At night, he prefers to sleep in a separate bed rather than with you, because he finds it uncomfortable to touch for extended periods of time. He b…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/24 03:04 AM
1

Depends on the reason he has?? And, if you use them for “business”, he will manage your account himself, not giving you access. Lol so he is gonna learn their API and how to code? And how would I not have access if I have access to my own code? Pretty sure this against any employer I’ve had’s rules, I wouldn’t be allowed to share access with anyone, much less give access and somehow remove my own access. It might actually be illegal in some situations… He’d be free to manage our shared business’…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/24 05:08 AM
1

It probably depends on my age. When I met my husband we were poor college students and I had no income expectations. What mattered to me was financial compatibility. So how does he spend and manage his money? My husband was frugal, and always researched purchases to get the best product, rent, etc for the money. He rented a place with roommates similar to the place I was renting with roommates. And he didn’t gamble, he didn’t have car loans, his only debt was a student loan. That was compatible …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/11/24 08:30 PM
1

I didn’t know how to cook when I got with my partner. Not all of us were taught this growing up. Luckily he didn’t care and he didn’t know how either. We learned together and now cook a tasty dinner together most nights, and we also like to cook for our family members when we visit them. It was really nice to be able to develop and grow together with my partner, not everyone has to know everything by the time they start dating (which starts happening in teenage years for many people). I found th…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/24 08:58 PM
3

No, but it’s very uncomfortable for me to go without a bra so I wouldn’t really feel like it’s an option for me. I’d probably rather men have to cover their tits up, seeing all the men mowing their lawns with their tits flopping around isn’t a highlight of my summer days. But at the beach what is the difference between the string bikini that is allowed to be worn, and covering the nipples up? Tits are already out. I don’t see the problem with beaches in Europe where the women just wear a bikini …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/24 08:51 PM
2

I expect some looking even with a top on. That’s why my first question was what the magical clothing was OP was suggesting existed that would “signal” I don’t want men looking. Honestly the topless beach I went to had zero staring. Yet when I meet men fully clothed I often catch them staring at my chest. I think context is probably more important than clothing. Many men actually would prefer if men would cover their chests, I’m not sure men like that it’s different. There is really no need for i…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/24 08:12 PM
3

What kind of work have you done? Question sounds rude, I’m not judging, just so I can apply it to my perspective in the convo. I’m a software engineer. Before my career took off I have also had various office jobs, like data entry (which I enjoyed automating), video editing, graphic designer, and scientific illustration. My point isn’t that SAHP doesn’t go beyond the 3-4 year mark, just that the trend of the role gets easier from that point, that if I was to concede that the responsibilities up …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/24 08:09 PM
8

A fleshlight isn’t a “wearable” item. It doesn’t go inside a body, and would probably be unsafe to do. I am not into painful or unsafe sexual activities. Now if a guy asks me to wear a strap on because he is needing a bit more stimulation, I’m certainly up for that. Other good toys to increase stimulation are vibrating cock rings, those little vibrators that are made to fit in/on the woman during penetration, using a dildo for double penetration, or butt plugs (if the man wears a butt plug durin…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/24 04:32 PM
10

Women’s clothing choices often signal the type of attention they expect, whether amplifying or minimizing their breasts. I’m not sure I understand here. Can you give me a sample of a “clothing choice” that “minimizes breasts” and signals expecting no kind of sexual attention? The claim that breasts are “neutral” also falls apart in transgender healthcare. For trans women, breast augmentation affirms femininity, while trans men often seek removal to align with masculinity. Breasts can’t be both n…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/24 04:12 PM
6

I can’t rely go in to the job part without prying, so I won’t intrude. I love my job, you could ask questions if you want. Sure, but we’re still condensing all the criticisms of the role to a small bracket of the timeline of parenting. If I could be told I have to work my butt off for 3-4 years and then live the rest in relative ease, I’d take it. Kids take longer than that to raise. My friend has 3 kids and has been busy with young kids for 15 years, the youngest is now attending school. Not su…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/24 09:16 AM
11

Yes, but what you described is a very small bracket of time of a child’s childhood, where everything you just explained stops happening, which is where the majority of the SAHP responsibilities are. 6 years isn’t “very small” amount of time, and with multiple kids it could be much longer you have have kids under 6. I’m not sure how you’ve never had a job like that before but kudos to you. I just never applied to a job that I thought I would be miserable doing. I like to stay busy, there are plen…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/24 08:34 AM
15

Yes, I think having no adult interaction and listening to crying, screaming, and baby talk all day, and cleaning actual shit and vomit up, having a baby bite at your nipple for hours on end, having kids demand things of you all day and night… I think it’s hard. I’ve never had a job that was like that before. Even day care workers get breaks and other adult interaction, and I wouldn’t work that job anyway. I would make sure to have a job that isn’t as awful, there is a huge choice so it’s pretty …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/24 07:27 AM
15

For me, doing something boring, monotonous, day in and day out, and especially with no adult interaction is hard to tolerate. Kids make it even harder, they are screaming all the time (even in happiness) they are demanding… for the first few years of their lives they need you for EVERYTHING you have to wipe their asses and feed them… sounds boring and exhausting, and loud. I just much prefer to spend my time learning things and making things. Spending time in ways that make me unhappy I call “ha…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/24 07:10 AM
1

I make like 300k at my day job. And I do prefer working for myself but I also like the money… So I guess that’s why I’m doing both for now. Big tech just pays so much more than my business, although we have plans for growth, so maybe one day, or at least I’ll be able to retire early and still have my own business. Luckily I’m on a team I’m not at beck and call 24/7, but just loosely 9-5 and they usually give me work I enjoy. Of course last week they offshored the entire groups project and I have…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/24 02:03 AM
1

Well I work a high paying job and have my own business, but I have never had kids, and I think it is much better than being bored, plus I get rewarded well for my efforts. I guess I just don’t like cleaning and childcare, I wouldn’t work as a nanny or a maid either, I’d be bored out of my mind doing that for a whole year.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/24 01:27 AM
7

I had to filter them by something. I didn’t have time to spend all day chatting with all the men I match with if I didn’t filter down the list. My understanding is male to female ratio on dating apps is heavily skewed with more men. It wasn’t all about looks, I also filtered by things said in the bio, traits listed (parenthood status, religion, etc), activities shown in the pictures, age, location…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/24 09:58 PM
2

Yeah I was purely responding to the statement that it’s crazy to think being a SAH parent 24/7 is “harder” than a job. I don’t think “hardness” should really be what matters - it should be time. My partner and I split chores with the goal to both have equal free time. Of course if one person’s task is more exhausting that can play into it as well, since they need to rest more from that, things like a very physical job or having to breastfeed every hour, but overall I think each person should get…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/24 08:50 AM
-1

That’s not quite right, it’s worse for me to do because it’s so monotonous and boring that it’s painful to do. So it’s not “better” - I don’t get how “too boring” is better. It’s harder for me to tolerate spending my time that way, not “harder” in that it requires more brain power or something. Am I the only one who can’t stand to do boring things? I don’t get why this is a hard concept. I can think of a million things I’d rather spend my time doing than cleaning, and my job is way more fun.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/24 06:46 AM
3

you’re crazy if you think being a 24/7 parent is harder than going to work. For me it’s not about what is physically easier to do - it’s about being way more boring The fact it is easier is actually a downside to me, I enjoy a challenge much more than boring tasks that are the same day and day out. My job is hard - in that I had to learn a ton of shit and compete with others for the job, and regularly get hard problems I am expected to solve. But I enjoy solving hard problems. I don’t enjoy clea…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/24 03:59 AM
–

If he’s willing to shave his balls, I’m willing to shave my pubes. He needs to understand it may not be hairless 100% of the time, it’s just not practical, but I’ll maintain it regularly. I don’t want him to shave me, I’d be worried about getting injuries or irritations, I have very sensitive skin and need to shave just right. I remove my armpit hair regardless, I also wouldn’t want a man doing that for me. And I don’t think a man would have any idea how to wash my hair correctly, I’ll skip that…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/11/24 02:45 AM
13

I am legally married. I’m just not married by your made-up definition, which is pretty irrelevant for everything outside this post. Eating vegan being called masculine is a new one for me, but sure. Who cares if I’m “masculine” anyway? Why do you keep bringing it up? Are you trying to compliment me or insult me? Since you think only masculine people are logical it sounds like a compliment… so, thanks? It’s served me quite well to be myself and live my life how I like.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/24 05:37 PM
10

But you told me earlier my marriage didn’t “count”, because he didn’t “publicly proposition” me? So sounds like with your definition I am “Nevmars” (which sounds like it means I’ve never been to mars lol).
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/24 04:49 PM
12

Sure. I don’t know your made up words dude.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/24 04:36 PM
28

If he’s the man of my dreams, then I would eagerly await the delicious homemade vegan breakfast in bed he is about to cook.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/24 10:00 PM
–

What I’ve noticed with gay people who come out later is that for women, since men do most of the asking, they were asked out starting as teenagers, before they admitted to themselves they were gay. They just said yes to offers, even though they didn’t feel a strong sexual attraction. They may even say yes to marriage without it, our culture doesn’t really emphasize a belief that women should be having strong sexual feelings, so they may think it’s normal to not have that. But for men, they ask w…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/24 06:56 PM
7

“Educated” people still don’t need to do it. You learn it in school and most people will never need it again. When you haven’t done something in a decade you don’t really remember how to do it, but it doesn’t matter because if the occasion happens that you do need it, you can look it up how to do it. I do multiplication in my head all the time in a real world setting, not sure why you think that one wouldn’t be used…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/24 05:39 PM
12

Do you think he is going to live forever? He accepted the Christian nationalist’s pick for VP. And he is already past his expected lifespan, and he isn’t healthy.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/24 05:25 PM
2

I think a lot of men are spending more time on porn than you think. There’s even a whole industry around treating porn addiction.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/24 02:09 AM
1

A lot of men spend a lot of time with porn and money on onlyfans. They are apparently supporting the entire porn industry, which is not a small thing. That just doesn’t sound like they are grossed out to spend resources and time on it. Even when having a woman who “isn’t like that” as a wife they continue to spend time and money on women who supposedly “gross them out”.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 10:45 PM
4

They arent grossed out by her body or by having sex with her. Theyre grossed out by the thought of committing their time and resources to her. But they use their resources on sex workers all the time…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 08:54 PM
6

If the men are sleeping with women who they are grossed out by then that is a whole other problem than insecurity, yeah. Maybe a sex addiction or something? Can’t understand why anyone would be having sex with someone who they think is gross.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 08:06 PM
3

Only he gets to decide if he wants to change his thought patterns, it’s why women should just leave if they are dating a man with this type of insecurity, not try to change the man. There are plenty of men who aren’t plagued by this anxiety and they will be easier to date.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 08:02 PM
0

No amount of calling men insecure is going to solve anything in terms of them being turned off by a woman’s count. When people say this the goal is usually not to make men who are turned off by that stop being turned off by that. It’s to point out that only insecure men are having this problem, it’s just describing them, not expecting them to change. When you date men you can see the pattern clearly. Some men just don’t care, they aren’t agonizing over it or thinking about it at all. They tend t…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 07:24 PM
–

Yeah, selective service based on gender is not fair. It tends to be men, not women, who insist women can’t serve in the military. Drafts should just be abolished altogether if possible, and if not, should be gender neutral. Getting an abortion is being accountable. It’s literally paying the cost for getting pregnant accidentally. Not sure what more cost needs to be paid for someone to be considered accountable.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 07:33 AM
–

If abortion didn’t exist then there would be more unplanned births. Using the technology we have to prevent unwanted children is responsible. There are of course ways to be even MORE responsible, like using multiple forms of birth control. But that doesn’t make doing the last option not be the responsible decision when faced with that.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 12:18 AM
–

It’s not too late if it’s not too late for an abortion. Most abortions are by women who have kids and don’t feel they have time or resources for another, it’s being responsible. More responsible than the men who didn’t wear a condom even though that is the last chance for their options in creating a new human.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 12:15 AM
–

Getting an abortion is taking accountability for your actions…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 12:12 AM
–

What do you mean by “used and abused”? Someone favoring women doesn’t mean women have more rights. Men are favored in my industry and get paid higher, it’s not like there aren’t areas that favor men. Anyway I do agree with you those examples you gave should be more equal.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/24 10:20 PM
–

The modern woman has been given all the rights of men and then some What rights do “modern women” have that men don’t? Most women will say something along the lines of “the options in men are terrible or every guy I date is a liar.” Nobody wants to pay full price for a used game and women’s value does go down with every man they let use and abuse them. When dating I felt a lot of guys were not compatible with me. Attitudes like yours, that men “pay” for women or that I can be bought, or that wom…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/24 10:12 PM
3

- Why do you think men cater to women? I don’t think that. - Why are women more in demand? Men tend to be hornier than women, on average. Women tend to be choosier. - Why are men over-supplied? Same reason. - Do you think the latter two are social or biological? Probably both. - Why haven’t men tried to balance that out yet? I mean maybe they have, they make porn and stuff, they made dating apps. - Do you think women are better humans than men overall? No. - Do you think women are inherently mor…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/24 08:24 PM
5

So, you have a habit of jumping in cars and hotels before knowing if the man is even considering being with you for marriage, yes? Yes, I have driven in cars with people without knowing if they want to marry me. I personally haven’t ever stayed at any hotels with a man except coworkers (in different rooms, no idea on their interest of marriage), my husband, and family members (who I presume didn’t want to marry me). Is it smart or not smart to jump into bed with random men who can overpower you?…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/24 04:08 AM
5

Oh, so risk being alone with a man, supposedly to have sex before making sure he is even interested in marrying you first? Yes, living with someone before marriage would involve being alone, having sex, eating dinner, watching tv, whatever… Are you seriously suggesting people should be MARRYING before spending time alone together??? 🤣 Putting yourself in the position of being *aped by a man by being alone with him before making sure he is even interested in marrying you first? Are you suggesting…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/24 12:55 AM
2

Is it also a “bad idea” to have sex before you know if you can live together? No, you should probably make sure you are sexually compatible before signing a lease or buying a house together! Are you suggesting women should sign a legal contract that merges assets with someone before even dating?! It is about commitment. Logically, once sex happens, and the women becomes pregnant, or the possibility she may get pregnant, without any legal contracts (aka marriage) between the two, 100% of the burd…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/11/24 09:30 PM
3

It’s a bad idea to get married before you know if you can even live together. You haven’t shown the connection to why being able to carry a baby would somehow inverse the logic of “don’t sign legal contracts without knowing everything”. My claim is that logic applies to everyone, I’m waiting for your logical explanation of why that isn’t true.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/11/24 08:57 PM
–

Are you asking if we hope we will breakup? Or like if women who had kids with past partners are hoping to have more kids? My past relationships didn’t work out because of incompatibilities and/or young age. I never even reached the stage of living together with any of them except my husband. So it’s not actually possible for my current relationship to have the same “outcome” of “never got serious” when I am married so it far surpassed that.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/11/24 07:26 PM
5

What does any of that have to do with making legal decisions hastily? That isn’t good for anyone, and nothing you mentioned has any relation to that. How would having a uterus mean you should hastily jump into legal contracts without all the information? Please explain the logical connections.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/11/24 07:07 PM
10

Edit: It would be logical for a woman to marry a man before moving in together. However, it would be logical for the man NOT to marry the woman before moving in together. Huh? Why would the same thing be logical for a man but not a woman? It doesn’t sound logical to me at all to marry someone before even knowing if you can live together! The logical thing for everyone is obviously to not jump into legal arrangements too hastily.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/11/24 08:00 AM
15

What is foting?? Did you mean “footing”? I still don’t get it. Like walking? I am a software engineer and work with women daily who use logic to decide how to make things that you likely use every day. Women are the primary ones doing family planning, taking birth control to limit their family size based on decisions from logic, going against biological urges to reproduce as much as possible. Men much more often want to skip the condom just to get a bit more sexual pleasure, despite it being muc…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 08:20 PM
1

Yes I work with some software engineers under 29. But I don’t think I know any engineering managers under 29. The men I was talking about were over that age though, the young guys mostly have girlfriends or are dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 02:32 AM
1

Software engineers or engineer managers.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 01:34 AM
2

I know a few men who earn a lot, but can’t keep relationships. To me it seems like they have mental illness or autism. For example, I have a family friend I’ve known for 30 years who can’t look me in the eyes, girls want to date him cuz he is attractive and makes good money, but they end up leaving because they can’t handle his quirks. I also know a few men who earn a lot but have no dates. They don’t seem to be trying, though, they don’t ask anyone out, don’t use dating sites, don’t desire marr…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/24 10:49 PM
1

No, I’m saying changing my clothing doesn’t stop men from giving me unwanted attention. That there are no attention-proof clothes that ward off men who want to harass women on the bus. Your OP asked why women complain about men giving them unwanted attention if they could just not dress provocatively - meaning they could stop the attention by wearing something specific, so why complain about it... right? I’m answering that we complain because that’s not true, there isn’t magical clothing that st…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/24 10:55 AM
1

I am saying the time I was harassed regularly - commuting to work - I was not revealing any “flesh”. I would wear revealing stuff to clubs and very rarely get harassed. So it’s false that showing more skin gets more unwanted attention. My clothing doesn’t change men’s behavior. I don’t care about men looking at me and wanting sex, I just don’t want them to bother me about it. If they want to bother me about it, my clothing has never stopped them. I asked for an example of “attention-proof” cloth…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/24 10:25 AM
1

Nah, that definitely doesn’t stop male attention at all. I was never showing any “flesh” except my face and hands in all my years commuting, and I got plenty of unwanted sexual attention. This is some wild-ass wishful thinking that men don’t think about fucking women unless they are “revealing flesh” lmao.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/24 10:11 AM
–

Lmao what??? Is this some kind of bait to get me talking about big dick…?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/24 08:11 AM
2

I never said “a lot of guys”, that really depends on what you mean by “a lot”. I would call it an average amount, lol. if it sits well with him idk... cuz not a lot of guys can be happy about the fact that some guy had his girl as a slut for one night, nor be okay with it without any second thought. Only on Reddit have I seen men as obsessed with this. In real life it has literally never been a problem for me that I have had casual sex and is considered normal where I live. My husband didn’t wai…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/24 03:53 AM
1

Sure, but he knows I’m his slut, so not “some other guys”. I just don’t think he spends much time thinking about what I was doing two decades ago.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/24 03:13 AM
2

I’d sleep with a man because I was single and horny, and sex is fun. I would NOT fuck a man I didn’t want to, for any reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/24 02:29 AM
2

There is no idea of me being some other guys slut - that’s in YOUR head, and not based on any kind of reality. The only ppl who I’ve seen being cool with it are cuck, that’s why I figured he had esteem issues or some thing. It’s not like I’m going out fucking other men while he’s at home thinking about it. I am just talking about having had sex before we even met, decades ago. Idk I guess some ppl’s definition of normal life is a history of relationships not sleeping around with random dudes, bu…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/24 01:26 AM
3

You misread. I said I care about more than just dick. In other words, I like his other qualities also.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/24 01:17 AM
6

Not sure where you are gathering any of that? OP brought up casual sex in a Q4W and that is the reason I thought about it. I last had casual sex 20 years ago and it wasn’t anything amazing, as I also clarified to OP that his assumption casual sex is always “amazing sex” is false. If I wanted to keep having casual sex instead of being with one man I could have just done that.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/24 01:16 AM
3

Why does that come in to mind? Because he doesn’t mind that I lived a normal life before I met him it means he has low self esteem? Or if he’s not plagued with anxiety like OP has it means that I am treating him bad?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/24 01:13 AM
15

Huh? Why would I want a relationship with a man I don’t want sex with?? And if I didn’t want sex with him, why would I even do “duty sex” twice a year? What is it you think I would get out of that?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/24 05:48 AM
8

Maintaining a formal relationship requires far more resources (time, logistical, financial, monetary) than maintaining informal/casual/ONS. And for most men in formal relationships, the frequency of sex decreases. I’m sorry, you are saying MOST men can get more sex from one night stands than from a girlfriend??? Everything men have been saying here is that most men can’t get casual sex at all! Have you posted here at all about how men here are lying and actually most men can get a new casual sex…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/24 05:46 AM
16

My husband was a virgin, and I’ve had casual sex before. I can’t say he ever wondered any of those things, I doubt it. He’s able to tell I view sex in a compatible way to him as we’ve talked about it. He knows he hasn’t had casual sex because he’s too shy for that, and he also knows I’m not shy, and he doesn’t find that to be an incompatible trait. To be fair, he never “asked a woman to marry him”, so maybe he wasn’t plagued with the same anxiety about doing that. If a man is dating a woman whos…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/24 01:33 AM
–

Nope, I haven’t noticed that at all. Some of the creepiest “audience” I’ve had is on the bus/train/walk to work in business-casual clothing. One of the creepiest occasions when someone followed me home, I was wearing a huge winter coat. Whereas I’ve gone to clubs in short skirts and crop tops and never had any problem with the “audience” at all. Do you think only “bad men” are attracted to certain types of clothing?? Or that men who harass women only do it to women in certain clothing items? Wha…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/11/24 05:52 PM
12

This has been my experience as well. Women don’t date a man they wouldn’t sleep with. Both men and women have casual sex with people they wouldn’t have a relationship with, if they are the type to have casual sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/11/24 05:41 PM
–

Any time men post the question here about why women certain clothes, when they claim to not want unwanted attention, I get excited to see their examples of “attention-proof” clothes women can wear. But I usually don’t get any! Only one guy gave me some examples - and it was a stick straight woman in pants and a blazer. I don’t think guys realize that not all women can put on some clothes and then magically look like the model. Most of the unwanted attention I’ve experienced was commuting to work…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/11/24 05:25 PM
11

I mean, the weather is always suitable when tights/leggings are a thing. Ok I’ll answer I guess since I do enjoy wearing a short skirt. I think I look good in it. That’s why. That’s the answer. Don’t men enjoy wearing clothes they think they look good in? As to unwanted attention, I haven’t noticed that change based on my clothes. I have gotten the most unwanted attention by far just commuting to work, in business-casual clothes. There doesn’t appear to be “unwanted attention proof clothes”. If …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/11/24 05:09 PM
21

Do you have an example of what kind of clothing you find “provocative”? I have no idea what kind of clothing that means, exactly. Plenty of people have seemed to think my body is provocative, and I’m not sure there is a way to hide it aside from some very ugly clothing. Another point that is confusing. That ladies on here complain they don’t like it when men are attracted to them just for their bodies. So again why dress proactively? I wouldn’t date a man who only likes me for my body.I’m not su…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/11/24 09:59 AM
1

His roommate.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/24 05:30 PM
–

Alimony is awarded in only 10% of divorces, it is not the norm. Family court is about child support, which you don’t even need to be married for much less have a no fault divorce. Everyone should be able to leave a marriage if they want to, it doesn’t matter who is at fault.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/24 03:42 AM
-1

No, why would I rather a man lie to me to be “compatible”??? What? I would prefer if he is actually compatible. A man who buys sex views sex as something that can be purchased, as something men buy or take from women, which is not aligned in my views of sex. I prefer to date people who see sex the same way as me. Lying would also make someone incompatible. I would discover their views on sex other ways - it’s not like men who view sex that way all actually use an escort, it’s just a flag someone…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/24 06:48 PM
0

I don’t care at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/11/24 05:58 AM
2

What kind of “problem” do you mean? Like not wanting to date them? I don’t care if someone wants to be a sex worker, but I wouldn’t date men who used those services because they wouldn’t be compatible with me. I also would never date a man who was religious, but I don’t think religion should be illegal.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/24 10:21 PM
3

Well that doesn’t sound like 50/50 to me. I’m guessing there is more to the story that you did so badly in court. Even without no fault divorce you could have done just as badly. Let’s say it was what OP wanted and cheaters get nothing at all. And say she cheated and also accused you of cheating, and you weren’t able to prove she was, but her lawyer managed to convince the judge you were. The fact is lawsuits can go bad for any party, it’s not the fault of no fault divorce.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/24 05:33 PM
4

I don’t see how you could convince me something I experience daily doesn’t exist. Maybe you just haven’t fallen in love yet? You not experiencing it doesn’t mean no one else has. The closest thing any of us get to love is the consistent help in life from our family. My husband and his family are also part of my family. My husband is my closest family. Anything outside family is typically highly conditional. My blood relatives haven’t given me any unconditional love. But my husband has never dema…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/24 10:32 AM
2

If one person is doing all the work and the other is doing none, they should initiate the divorce themselves, not just keep letting them mooch until they decide to divorce and take half. Most couples don’t work like that, one person might be getting work outside the home and the other doing things like childcare, but that’s not “not working”. Splitting tasks like this is literally the reason marital assets are joint, not just all owned by the one doing work outside the home, it’s assumed to be a…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/24 10:12 AM
5

Wait, so if someone cheats, the other person gets to take all their money? What kind of proof are you thinking would be accepted? If someone provides a photo of a couple together in a house, is that enough to have them lose all their money? Seems like this would either get massively taken advantage of, or the burden of proof would be too difficult and expensive to get. Makes more sense to me to just have each person take their half of the joint money if someone wants to leave. It’s generally und…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/24 03:53 AM
–

For my husband’s bday this year I took him and his two best friends and their SOs on a sailboat tour.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/24 05:16 PM
4

Sure, your description came off that you were unable to work or go to school due to anxiety, living with parents while going to school is not the same thing. You can meet other women in your school that are similar to yourself, I highly doubt women going to school are only dating men who have a degree already.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/24 06:31 PM
3

Most people want partners on their level and with shared goals. If you are unable to work or go to school, college educated women are probably not on the same level and have different goals than you. I don’t even know where you meet them or why you would be considering them as good matches for yourself. I work with a lot of educated (including self educated) women. I haven’t seen them have trouble finding men, myself, I can’t even think of one who is single. Many are with men in the same industr…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/24 05:56 PM
3

You probably can’t get with a woman who has a degree and a good career if you are unable to live as an adult. You might have better luck with a similarly abled woman as yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/24 05:29 PM
–

If a man can’t find a way to have that fun because he isn’t attractive enough and he wants to have that fun, then what is the issue then if he has to pay to find it? I don’t have an issue, he can do what he wants. He just is probably not compatible with me so I wouldn’t date him. I don’t tend to have sex with men not attractive enough to have sex, nor with men who think I’m giving them something for free or who buy or sell sex. Do you assume that all men paying for sex think poorly of the women …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/24 05:01 AM
–

It’s not about the “ease of access” it’s about the idea that sex is something men buy from women. That’s just not compatible with my views. If a man was purchasing men to play games with him instead of having friends I would also find it a red flag. Most men wouldn’t want to date a woman who sold sex, either, you should compare to that, not casual sex, which most people don’t care about.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/24 04:00 AM
–

Do you really think that the views on sex of men who have a lot of sex and the men who use prostitutes are really that different? Not necessarily, anyone can have the views I would filter out, but buying sex would be a strong sign they have it. Plenty of other men have incompatible views as well, I never said those would be the ONLY men I filter out! If so, how? They have the idea that sex is something paid for by men and sold by women, rather than a fun activity two people enjoy doing together.…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/24 03:55 AM
–

What additional information? Hooking up and buying sex are not the same thing. For me it’s the purchasing sex part I have a problem with, not the number of times he’s done it. If he hooked up that’s fine, and then it matters more if he only wants that or if he’s looking for a relationship, and if I want to be with him for a hookup or a relationship, and whether we are aligned in our desires. But I wouldn’t want to date a man who sees prostitutes, it’s just not compatible with my views.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/24 03:48 AM
–

I most likely wouldn’t be compatible with men who purchase sex. It’s not really about the number of times he did something, it’s about his views on sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/24 03:31 AM
0

The length of time wasn’t really my point. My point was “passionate sex” has always involved intense pleasure for both people, with the high emotions involved and strong desire to please each other. It becomes a feedback loop of pleasure. But from your definition here then your “routine sex” example sounds the most passionate…? Also sounds like you just aren’t into the kind of sex I am at all, so your definition of “passionate sex” sounds kinda boring, tbh, and if the guy is orgasming and I’m no…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/24 01:53 AM
0

I guess all the sex I’ve had that I would describe as “passionate” has involved multiple orgasms. We weren’t using the phrase “loving sex”, it was “passionate sex”. Sure I might have a quickie or just me giving pleasure to my partner (like oral or a handjob) that is loving sex but I didn’t orgasm - but those just don’t resonate with the phrase “passionate sex” to me. My most passionate sex has been things like pleasuring each other all night until the sun comes up, getting so lost in it we didn’…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/24 01:35 AM
2

“Passion” to me means fueled by love, so I don’t understand at all how I would have “passionate sex” with someone I don’t know well or am not comfortable with. Also I don’t think I would ever describe something as “passionate sex” if I didn’t even orgasm!!
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/24 01:17 AM
3

Why do you assume if you are pursuing a career in your 20s you can’t date? I have a career and started dating my husband at 23. All the “career women” I work with are not single (I can’t even think of one who is), and most of the older women have kids, so seems quite possible to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/24 07:45 PM
20

You never see men put two women side by side, tell them to fight to the death, and pick the winner and his mate. You never see women do that to men, either…??? I mean… do you?? Where do you live? Is there an app for this?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 02:32 AM
4

But not all men or women are the same. Lots of women don’t date friends, haven’t you seen all the complaints from men about the “friend zone”? And lots of men want a partner who is a friend, and I preferred to date men who are aligned with me on that.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 10:40 PM
7

My longest two relationships (one is my marriage) started as friends. So I’ve managed fine to find men who feel the way I do. I might have had a better “success rate” with strangers if you mean “men saying yes”, but I’ve never had a desire to be with a stranger before, so it just wouldn’t happen as I would never desire to ask one out… “Success” for me means dating someone I want to date - not just random strangers I have no interest in.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 08:29 PM
14

Q4W: Do you think it’s understandable if a guy is celibate simply because he doesn’t like his gender role in dating? Sure. I don’t care at all if someone else wants to date or have sex or not, they should do what is best for themselves. Women have been rejecting all their gender specific roles and expectations, or at least they fought for the opportunity to do so. Yep, my husband and I don’t follow the typical gender roles at all. But the pursuer/pursued dynamic still exists in heterosexual dati…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 06:58 PM
1

All I am saying is that the more men move up, the more options they get. But that’s false. Men at the top of the ladder are not seeing women at the bottom of the ladder as options! Do you see top men dating ugly mean antisocial women? No? They have filtered them out just as you are accusing women of doing. I know many, many successful women who have nobody, because they simply want somebody above them. Men want someone above them too, they just pick different traits than women do. Who are these …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/24 10:08 PM
1

Where did I say anything about a woman’s financial status?? You said as a man improved, he increased his options. I disagreed and said men who were successful were not dating women who are ugly, mean, anti social, etc. My point is the options IMPROVE, not increase in count because most men do have standards. So you are saying hot rich men frequently date ugly old asexual anti social women? You are just listing traits different genders like. You’ve decided the ones men tend to have more of, like …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/24 09:49 PM
1

So you are saying men are naturally superior than women because they are taller? Therefore an average woman who is with an average man is automatically with “someone superior to themselves to submit to”? So doesn’t this mean men naturally want someone superior to them to submit to also? Since they want someone “curvier, fuller head of hair, more in touch with their emotions, more nurturing, better at maintaining social networks”? The more she goes up on this pyramid, the less options are availab…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/24 09:34 AM
8

Here’s the blunt take: in this view, women are all about the financial stability that marriage brings. It’s not about romance or connection — For them, marriage is like a safety net that secures a comfortable lifestyle without having to stress about money. You think when women get married, they don’t have to stress about money? Are you saying marriage makes a couple rich automatically or something? Our mortgage did not disappear when we got married. How do I get this benefit?? When they marry so…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/24 11:31 PM
2

Yes of course that’s how I would describe it as that’s what I saw happen and what tons of people have been convicted and are in jail for… I didn’t even describe Kamala at all so I’m not sure what you are saying that my description of her is biased? The two party system is truly ridiculous. What happens if one party dies? We have a one party system? Yeah it’s insane.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/24 06:34 AM
1

Most people learn that one person can’t speak for everyone of a group, especially such a huge group as half the population, when they are young. When people answer questions like “what do women want?” it would be unanswerable if we just took that to mean “what do all women want?”, so in English it’s understood to mean the asker is looking for an idea of what some women want. So women will answer for themselves, and it’s assumed the listener will understand the woman is not saying women are alien…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/24 10:59 PM
16

Tons of men here have even insisted up and down to me that any man who claims to want something different, then he must be lying to me. Lots of them really think men are a monolith and anyone claiming to be different is a liar, as apparently also all men are.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/24 10:52 PM
4

You don’t think childfree couples shouldn’t live together or what? Who should buy the house we live in? My husband and I have so much shared stuff I can’t even see how we would have kept it separate. Even just our car - whose car would it be if we didn’t share anything? What on earth would kids have to do with sharing finances?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/24 05:52 PM
2

Because it’s kind of fucked up. Only modern country in the world to use the electoral college system. A person’s vote is actually worth a lot more in the unpopulated states than in the ones people tend to actually live in. Also the Republican states like to draw their districts to take advantage of how the representatives get elected as well - they draw a ”district” that has like 40% of an area that tends to vote Dem, and 60% with Rep voting so as to just cancel the 40% out - whereas if they dre…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/24 03:45 AM
12

I mean, one candidate is a convicted felon, with a history of being a conman, and last time he was president and lost an election he led an insurrection trying to overthrow the capital. The other is the possible first woman president the country has ever had. How would those two options not be a big deal to Americans?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/24 02:37 AM
7

I wouldn’t lie about it, and I couldn’t expect my partner to lie. I presume we might talk about it after dating a bit. My husband did not tell me I was his first until we were having sex for like 2 weeks. But he didn’t lie - I didn’t ask. To tell me, he asked when I lost my virginity, and I didn’t lie. No one has ever asked for my “number”, if that’s what you mean. I didn’t keep track of it, so wouldn’t be able to answer more than a guess. More common are questions about what each other likes in…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/24 03:58 PM
3

Are you saying like… women don’t go to college and instead just fuck men, but men go to college and get a good job… and then women who fucked men can’t get a job, so look for a man who has a job so they can mooch off of him? And you think this is a common scenario? I have to say, having sex has never prevented me from pursuing school or work. I was able to pursue my career and enjoy a good sex life. I don’t even see why you think it would get in the way. If anything, school and work make it easi…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/24 03:46 PM
0

I think a lot of men are arguing for the case: Its almost injustice when the woman gets to do whatever and still gets bailed out, so her entire life she gets rewarded for being selfish. What does it mean for the woman to get “bailed out”? Bailed out of what? And the guy might not know what is happening because he was forced to build himself up in other ways earlier on due to less options. Why would building yourself up result in “not knowing what is happening”? Are you saying self improvement ma…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/24 10:35 AM
13

I mean, I don’t think it’s hereditary, and if it is, we’d be just as likely to get the gene from our fathers as our mothers. So if one parent was “dominant” and the other is “submissive” then it depends which gene is dominant or recessive - if they are both the same type then it’s a 50/50 chance for either one.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/24 02:43 AM
17

Men pass just as many of their genes to their daughters as to their sons… so if they pass on their “dominant genes” then that would make dominant daughters…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/24 02:39 AM
3

My husband did this - he was just about to turn 31. I was very shocked. He told me like 2 weeks after we started sleeping together. I was just surprised, that’s how I reacted. I wasn’t upset he didn’t tell me beforehand - I can totally understand why he didn’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/24 06:16 PM
1

plays video games watches anime This is a positive, not a red flag. Unless they are doing it 24/7 or something. Or maybe if it’s only really bad anime they are into. But watching anime together and playing games together are things I enjoy doing with my partner. follows thirst trap cosplayers and models through social media Just following is probably fine. I don’t care about porn. But if he actually thinks he has a relationship with them, or messages them, that’s a red flag. likes violent movies…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/24 06:08 PM
5

I’m all for egalitarian. But worrying about $5 seems cheap, yeah, like nickel and dining.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/24 02:00 AM
3

I didn’t opt out of a second date necessarily, just would be cautious and need to learn more info. It just comes off as cheap.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/24 12:11 AM
13

I don’t mind splitting the bill and probably prefer it even. But $10??? I would have a probably already offered to pay the whole thing myself! It’s so small it doesn’t seem worth the effort of splitting the check. This guy probably would come off as too cheap for me. I would have just covered the whole bill myself so he didn’t have to lose $5 since it seems like he needs the money, and assumed he was seriously in debt. I’d also be on the lookout for if he was interested in me because of my incom…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/24 06:30 PM
1

Not in the slightest.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/24 03:51 PM
2

I had a friend do this once. She was young and always tended to be a bit gullible her whole life. He told her they were separated/divorcing, but it was obvious to me that wasn’t true. I tried to convince her but she didn’t listen to me. He also told her he wasn’t sleeping with his wife anymore (because they were separated) but that became an obvious lie when both my friend and the wife became pregnant the same week. She finally came to her senses at that point, got an abortion, and dumped him. I…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/24 06:25 PM
44

Yes, doing stuff with a man’s butt I am not into if they have an unattractive ass. Like, I can be attracted to a man as a whole even if his ass is really hairy, and have normal sex. But if he wants me to use my strap on with him, he needs to groom things better down there, clear up any butt acne, etc. And having a cute butt will help, it will make me desire to stick something in it. Also with oral, if his cum tastes nasty or his belly is so big it’s in the way, or he is so hairy I am breathing i…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/24 10:38 PM
2

Even if you adjust for hours worked, women still get paid less than men. I’m under the impression the wage gap is closing, though. It’s even smaller if you adjust for education and job experience, in addition to hours: For example, in 2020, women earned 82.3% of men’s median earnings for all workers working 35 hours or more per week. However, for those working 40 hours per week, women earned 87.4% of men’s median earnings. This means that controlling for hours worked alone reduced the pay gap by…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/24 07:29 PM
4

I haven’t seen wage gap referring to women not working - it’s always been about the wage when working.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/24 07:11 PM
4

Are you talking about people married with children? If a woman is doing the childcare it’s not like the man is paying for her and it’s some privilege - she’s working as well. Childcare is expensive, you have to consider she’s at least working for that amount that would have to be paid out if she didn’t do it. That’s not a man paying her bills - that’s a couple dividing their time up in a way that makes sense for them financially, the bills and children are shared and they are both putting effort…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/24 06:16 PM
2

Anyone doing illegal activity is at risk of being robbed or raped or other bad things and not being able to go to the police for help without also admitting to the illegal activity. It’s dangerous and not worth the small amount of money it makes. (Not worth risking it for some sex either.) Sex workers don’t make that much, not enough to be rich, you have been lied to if they are telling you they are getting rich from it. It’s certainly not enough to risk jail. My legal job where I have no risk o…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/24 03:45 PM
6

I get you don’t, but there are many countries it’s illegal in, not just US. It’s not really worth risking going to jail or getting raped or robbed on the job to be a street prostitute.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/24 06:21 AM
24

Like to pay her bills? I don’t think that’s a normal relationship... And OP listed a bunch of things like sugar babies and porn. He even responded to me about how great prostitution was, he didn’t claim that wasn’t what he was talking about at all. He is jealous he can’t be a prostitute (he even complained that even if he accepted male customers they want a certain dick size).
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/24 03:28 AM
4

USA
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/24 02:55 AM
16

Women being sex workers is easy life What?? It grosses me out. And sex I don’t want hurts. I don’t enjoy being grossed out or in pain and would not consider having to do those as an easy life. Also many men won’t want to have a relationship with a sex worker, so it would limit my options for having a loving relationship and enjoyable sex, which is the kind of life I actually want. I dont know why feminist dont admit it, sex workers earn x3, x5, x10 or more than the “aVeRage” salary in any countr…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/24 02:42 AM
15

It’s just a profession. Where’s the privilege? There’s a lot of precessions I can’t do. It’s not really that helpful that one prostitution might not be on that list. I’m sure you have stuff on your list you can do that I can’t. There is no way to make it that all humans have the ability to do the same profession. You have whatever abilities you have that are in demand, and I have mine. Prostitution would not make me nearly as much money compared to my actual profession or any of the others I con…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/24 12:34 AM
61

I guess we just don’t think the ability to be a prostitute is somehow any kind of benefit. It just sounds like a bad job to me. There are a lot of jobs I can’t do because I don’t have the body for it, this just sounds like something many men can’t do for that reason, although if you are open to male customers you still could sell sex as a man.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/24 11:51 PM
5

I’m an egalitarian. I expect my partner to also be so, and to contribute in the ways he can. We can divide up any work needing to be done based on our abilities and preferences, or split things 50/50 if neither of us prefers it or excels at it. This would be different for every man, as not all men have the same skills and preferences.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/24 05:19 PM
3

You asked if “high libido women are horny independently of how men look” - high libido women are often spontaneously horny, just like high libido men. So the answer is yes, we can get horny totally independent of men and what they look like. For me it was horniness that made me seek out attractive men. So just seems like you have the directionality wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/24 03:05 AM
2

Yes, I get horny even if I don’t see a single man. Now who I go to relieve the horniness would only be men I find attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/24 02:51 AM
2

If they don’t even care enough to even make an attempt to know it, it apparently isn’t that much of an issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/24 06:10 PM
2

Lose interest when? I’m saying no one ever even asked or knew.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/24 05:05 PM
2

Then it sounds like it’s not really a big deal after all, and they don’t care that much, not even enough to try to find it out.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/24 04:49 PM
3

If they don’t care enough to even know, then it’s not really a big deal and doesn’t sound like “they only care for dating/marriage”. If you “cared about something for dating/marriage”, would you really not even ask about it before asking to marry someone? I care about sexual compatibility in a relationship, and I absolutely found out about it before marrying anyone. If men cared about this for relationships, they would try to find it out.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/24 04:48 PM
2

It hasn’t even seemed to matter to most men for dating and marriage either. I’ve never even had a single man ever even ask.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/24 04:37 PM
6

I haven’t dated in 18 years and hope I never have to again, although I enjoy being in a relationship a lot, so would most likely still do it if I ever found myself single again. I just don’t let men bring me drinks. Multiple “friends” were with me when it happened, not only did they not notice anything, they didn’t even believe me when I told them what happened. I didn’t drink enough I think, so was able to kind of wake up and push him off me and escape when he led me off. I ran out of the room …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/24 10:10 AM
14

Dating was not “incredibly fun” for me, and I can’t understand how you wouldn’t get that not everyone is into it. I’m an introvert, hanging out with strangers is uncomfortable for me, and doubly so for strangers trying to get in my pants. Also the time a guy drugged my drink and attempted to rape me was the most terrifying experience of my life.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/24 07:31 PM
22

If men want to be in a relationship with a 5 or 9, they will treat them very similar once they are in it, same amount of love and values. But in your OP you also seemed to be stating women’s problem is they think men will treat them like a 9 even if they are a 5: they get tired of getting used and rejected […] women are in a perpetual cycle of wanting to believe her sexual market value matches her relationship market value. So which is it, men won’t treat them different, or women are dumb for th…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/24 06:12 PM
1

Kids don’t help deal with how to split things when there is a split…?? We are married, so yes we have a legal contract. One of the reasons we got married. When we bought our first house we weren’t married yet, but we were both on the deed and would have just split it 50/50 if we needed to sell, as we paid into it 50/50.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/24 03:06 PM
1

I wasn’t old when I moved in with my partner and we started having some shared finances. We didn’t even know if we wanted kids or not at that time, we obviously wanted to test out sharing finances before bringing kids into the picture! Eventually we were able to buy a house together that we couldn’t have done alone. I don’t see why kids have anything to do with sharing finances, if anything you’d want to make sure you are on the same page with finances before even considering kids. It can be hel…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/24 09:39 AM
9

They don’t want consequences for their wild years, they want to hit the reset button and find “home” when the bad boy starts looking more like a dead end than a thrilling ride. What kind of “consequences” are you expecting women should have for having “wild years”? But when you choose mystery and danger you loose your home. Thats the point. Your life gets torpedoed.Your old life moves on without you. You choose a different path, you don’t have the privileges and benefits of having “home” anymore…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/24 03:43 AM
1

Are you asking why couples with no children would share finances?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/24 12:14 AM
22

Handsome and faithful. If I need money I can make it myself. There isn’t really a point in having a husband who is ugly or a cheater, that’s not something I can somehow get on my own.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/24 08:50 PM
1

My friend’s kids are great and not that young, we would be fine. My brother’s kids are difficult and one is a newborn, there are multiple mothers and many other family members so it’s unlikely I’d ever have them though.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/24 05:18 AM
–

My stance of actually recommending it to someone would probably not change, I can’t say why I would recommend that to any men. I think purchasing the use of someone’s body is a bit gross, but I also think eating animals is gross and wouldn’t recommend anyone eat it. I don’t really think my preferences or recommendations really matter to anyone though. No one has ever asked me for a recommendation on seeing sex workers… or on eating meat.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/24 09:27 PM
–

If it’s illegal I wouldn’t recommend it to more men, no.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/24 07:25 PM
12

Not really. I’m more jealous men don’t have to deal with all the trouble the female reproductive system brings. There’s skills I have that I am better at than the average person, and it doesn’t really bother me many people are better than me at things like opening jars or throwing balls.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/24 04:02 PM
2

I have promised my best friend that if something happened to her and her husband that I would take care of her kids. I also would try to take in my brother’s kids if something were to happen to him and their mothers. Outside of someone I know needing help, I probably would not consider it. And I certainly wouldn’t be a stay at home mom if I did end up needing to care for children.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/24 06:43 AM
5

First option. I have no desire for kids so I can’t pick the second. The way you frame it is odd: it’s not clear why it needs to mean she is “selfish” or “not caring about the men she is with”. Or that the second option would be “selfless”. I presume you think men who have careers instead of homeschooling their kids are selfish as well? Me homeschooling kids is probably a bad idea and would be selfish to do something like that. I was abused by my mother and have mental illness from it, and wouldn…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/24 02:33 AM
3

I don’t think passion is an “alpha man” thing. I’ve seen passion among many different kinds of men. Also it’s totally possible to have both. My man is pretty stable (not sure if this means mentally or financially or what, but I guess he’s both). But he is also quite kinky and passionate in bed. Never even considered it should be either/or - like you can only experience passion and excitement if you are mentally unstable??? I don’t think that’s normal. I have mental illness and I don’t think it’s…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/24 04:03 PM
–

Is that “pursuing women out of your league and spending money on them despite getting no dates”? I guess I wouldn’t think just going to a strip club is necessarily pursuing them for dating or sex, unless you really are trying to get them to date you or fuck you.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/24 06:58 AM
–

well buying stuff to give them or spending it on whatever in hopes that will make them have sex with you is not really any more appealing.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/24 06:53 AM
–

So are the ladies who you don’t open a door for fucking you now? They get so turned on by opening their own door they just go to the first man they see or something? When you don’t give up a seat to an old lady on the bus, she asks you back to her place after?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/24 06:39 AM
–

If he seriously told me “I used to give money to girls much hotter than you in hopes they would fuck me and it didn’t even work!” then yeah that would be an ick. Just sounds pathetic, and also I’m not really interested in men who like to buy sex, especially not dumb ones who don’t even buy it from the people selling it so are just giving money away. If he was just asking women out that were super hot that wouldn’t bother me.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/24 06:32 AM
–

“Value” for what exactly? Was there some way to cash in on whatever that value was? I didn’t spend any of this value I supposedly had as far as I know, so not sure how helpful it was to begin with. Personally my net worth and expendable money has gone up as I’ve gotten older, not down, and I’m not sure what value I would need outside of the real value we use in this society.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/24 06:27 AM
–

How would I know? I have no idea what the “league” of women was that my husband pursued before me.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/24 06:22 AM
1

No, I mean that sure I miss it sometimes. I don’t actually want to have sex with anyone else. You can miss something occasionally but not go and do it. Also it’s pretty normal to occasionally miss being younger and doing whatever you were doing then when you are middle age. I don’t actually want to go back in time as I’m quite happy with the life I’ve built, but I can enjoy the memories sometimes.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/24 09:06 AM
1

Sometimes. Overall I tend to prefer a comfortable routine over spontaneity and variety though. (With everything, not just sex.) We also try to change things up now and then and try something new, or get a new toy.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/24 05:14 AM
1

Variety. Sex with each person is pretty different, which can be interesting.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/24 03:14 AM
5

Sure, but I wouldn’t describe the intimacy with a stranger as “more raw and intimate” compared with intimacy of someone you are deeply in love with like OP was. I didn’t say it wasn’t possible to be intimate with a stranger at all, just that I didn’t see it as more intimate than love.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/24 10:06 PM
4

Best casual was one of my last casual, was mainly because we were both just open with each other about it being casual and everything was chill. Most of my casual was neutral. Sex can’t really get that amazing when casual, because it’s casual. It lacks the intensity that happens when in love. The bad casual experiences were when men didn’t respect boundaries or didn’t care about my pleasure at all. Finally how is your best LTR sexual experience different from the casual experiences? How would yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/24 08:04 PM
3

If I’m not feeling it at that moment. I need to feel a connection and also feel horny. I might like a guy but not have gotten to that point where I want sex. There also could be any number of random reasons, like I’m on my period, we haven’t had intimate make out time yet, I need to get up early the next morning. Usually I want to after a few dates, but it’s not a set in stone thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/24 05:50 AM
5

I’ve always just had sex with partners when we both are wanting to do it.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/24 03:36 PM
2

I think society has always been a few smart people and a lot more normal intelligence ones. We need a lot of people who will just follow a leader, do boring work, etc. We only need a smaller percentage of people who are inventors and thinkers. Think of a small tribe. A couple people might come up with new weapons, then all the hunters can use it and get better results. The person designing it might be more near sighted, and not hunt well, but can see small details well. The hunters may have more…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/24 04:04 PM
1

I don’t get the “should”. Each couple should do what works best for them. One of our couple friends have their own bedroom, another one they have their own house. But my husband and I don’t need our own bedroom or house as we prefer to share one. This is just personal preference, not everyone has your preferences. Sharing a room didn’t involve giving up our favorite color…??? We have always made sure to have our own space we can “own”, it hasn’t always been a whole room though (depends where we …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/24 04:53 PM
1

Yes because I already do. I don’t walk around the city with them though, I have a taser for that.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/24 03:19 AM
1

No, I don’t have any reason to suspect he’s cheating.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/24 09:11 PM
–

Yeah I’m in the PNW and it’s not an issue at all to find fit progressive men. Also statistically in the US conservatives are more likely to be obese…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/24 04:29 PM
5

If my husband told me he suspected me of cheating on him and getting pregnant by another man, I’d be hurt because the truth would be that I didn’t cheat. I would have thought the trust was built already for us to get married. Ladies, Imagine if the roles were reversed. Imagine a world where a man could magically implant his side chick’s embryo into his unsuspecting wife. Would women stand by and say, “Oh, just trust your husband; he’d never do that to you”? Hell no. They’d demand safeguards, the…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/24 01:53 AM
2

I claimed maturity being on good decision making. Yep. You also claimed men make the bad decision to cheat more than women. So you are saying men are less mature, right? Check the stats about how much percentage of men are actually sexual criminals, the number is really low so majority isn’t. Women still choose bad men It usually isn’t obvious. The decision is more about staying or leaving when you find out. Emotions are strange things, people grow attached. That’s why getting abused is not abou…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/24 08:18 PM
2

Because abuse has nothing to do with maturity. You keep claiming it does, but have not provided any evidence of such. Women are more likely to be abused because they are weaker than men and so easier to abuse. Victims are often from a more vulnerable group of people. It’s not about maturity at all. Now your example of men cheating more than women, despite the consequences of divorce (so making a bad decision) might be more related to maturity.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/24 05:19 PM
2

Maturity has nothing to do with getting abused. My dad is far more mature than my mother, yet she is the abusive one. There is no connection to being an abuse victim and maturity that I am aware of and you haven’t provided any information countering that. I am not understanding at all on how men cheating more somehow shows they are more mature than women? Or that cheating more is better decision making?? Cheating often results in divorce, which is something that a lot of men here complain about,…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/24 03:50 PM
10

Not really, he was almost 40 when he married my mom, he had a PhD and owned a house and had already been married once... I feel like that should be mature enough. And tons of other people are in abusive relationships, it’s not even remotely something that only happens to young people. If women reach max maturity faster - that still doesn’t mean “young women” who are falling for manipulation have reached it. They can be more mature than men their age but still not fully mature. I haven’t seen any…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/24 08:05 AM
20

It’s “more mature compared to men their age” - not “maximum possible maturity”. Young men also fall for manipulative women. And people of all ages and genders can be in abusive relationships, I’m not sure it’s a maturity thing. My dad is nearly 80 and is very mature and intelligent - yet he’s in an abusive relationship. Emotions are an odd thing, anyone can grow attached to someone and want to stay with them even if they are abusive. It’s probably much more about your childhood and the kind of r…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/24 07:33 AM
1

There are just no contracts with even normal employment. Nothing is signed, except maybe an employee signing a handbook saying they agree to the policies, or signing an offer letter agreeing to the offer (which can be retracted at any time). Employees are free to quit at any time for any reason, and employers are free to fire them at any time for any reason with the exception of some reasons protected by the government - like pregnancy or sexual orientation.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/24 04:45 PM
2

In US employment contracts are very rare.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/24 03:33 PM
11

To the point I’m struggling to think of reasons not to. Really? You couldn’t think of a single one? I never found any reasons to have them. What are the reasons to have kids? Some reasons I don’t: pregnancy sounds terrifying and painful giving birth sounds terrifying and painful kids are a ton of work kids cost a lot of money kids take a bunch of time you don’t know what you will get - might be a healthy baby, might be someone with disabilities that you have to care for the rest of your life, or…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/09/24 03:22 PM
6

The real trouble in the Western world is that men have to compete for women with the government. How? I thought of all the reasons I enjoy having my partner and don’t see any way to get any of that from the government? Are you talking the US gov or some other country? The US government at least does not offer being my life partner, give me companionship, or give me orgasms. And without any reward for it. I get paid for my work. I think in capitalism that’s supposed to be the reward? What kind of…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/24 05:14 PM
11

Yes, I am obviously not in a platonic relationship with my husband. Why on earth would I even date someone if I wasn’t attracted to them? Do you date people you aren’t actually attracted to?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/24 02:19 AM
18

Yes I am very attracted to him and want to fuck him all the time. I wouldn’t have even gone out with him if I wasn’t! I have never in my life been attracted enough to a man to want to fuck him without knowing at least some of his personality, so I am not really sure what you mean by “raw sexual attraction” if it is somehow not including personality traits at all. The traits I find sexually attractive are a mix of physical and personality traits, and includes things like their scent, and I’ve nev…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/24 11:30 PM
2

I don’t think my partner and I have any “rules” that are different for male or female friends. Having boundaries doesn’t mean you aren’t friends, though. What do you think bi people do - do they have no friends?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/24 04:34 PM
10

Aren’t you the guy who thinks “women hate sex” and “the clitoris doesn’t cause orgasms”?? You’re the only one saying that shit, I’ve never seen a single woman here say women don’t want sex in relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/24 04:13 AM
9

We don’t have kids. He didn’t make enough to save for retirement. You think I should retire with extra money and not let him retire at all, since he didn’t contribute half to the retirement fund? That seems silly. I am hoping to retire much sooner than 67 and I work hard to get what I want. I share that wealth with my partner because I love him and he’s my partner, and part of the reason I worked hard was so we could both retire comfortably together.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/24 11:43 PM
7

Exactly! I actually put in the work in part because of him, because I wanted to enjoy the benefits together.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/24 11:20 PM
8

I’m upper middle class. I save plenty even while living within my own means, I don’t need to live as if I am low income to save money. I don’t have any desire to work as hard as I have over the years, but continue to live as if I didn’t and just hoard extra money for no purpose. I worked hard to be able to do things I want to with my partner and live how I want and to be able to retire and for my partner to be able to also. I bought us a house we can spend the rest of our lives in and have retir…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/24 11:17 PM
1

Children aren’t necessary for society to continue Uhh… 🤔
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/24 11:02 PM
6

I wouldn’t be able to live the lifestyle I do if I expected my lower earning partner to pay half of everything. Part of the reason I worked so hard is to have more of the lifestyle I want. Not doing that would be like cutting off my nose to spite my face.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/24 10:43 PM
6

I don’t want any kids. I have already reached my 40s without kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/24 10:37 PM
1

If all the women quit doing any work, there would be a huge mass of unsupervised children. Are the police men and nuclear engineer men going to be taking crying babies with them to do their job? As well there would be a huge number of sick people and others who need caretakers completely without care. Would these nuclear engineers be caring for their elderly father and their crying baby and their screaming toddler while doing their job?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/09/24 08:57 AM
9

I think you may want to learn about sentences in English. It really helps people to be able to read anything you say if you write in the same language, maybe your native language is different and you need a bit more practice, just look up sentence structure English - it will help you a lot. I’ll attempt to parse it as best as I can. Child free women Okay? This “sentence” seems to have no subject. Is this missing a question mark and you are asking what a child free woman is? It’s a woman who does…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/24 08:57 AM
11

So I guess as a childfree woman there’s no wall?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/24 07:51 AM
1

That was OPs suggestion to “filter the best ones” from “thousands of matches”. I was questioning that was really “easy”. It wasn’t my suggestion to do it. So take it up with OP. In reality, people who have thousands of matches probably ignore most of them. A lot of men complain about women doing that too, though.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/24 03:51 PM
1

As long as you accept the risks that comes with it then go right ahead The point was I can’t get the man’s risk from it, I will always have a woman’s risk, as a woman. The claim was “paying for a date” was harder than “not being able to fuck on a date for fear of getting raped”. I think it is harder to not have sex when I actually want to, or to do it and risk my safety and pregnancy, than to pay for dinner. You asked for techniques or methods to filter, vet, and protect yourself like it’s hard …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/24 04:51 AM
11

Women who had a promiscuous past, filled with ONS, FWB, short term relationships, etc., who eventually decided to settle down and find an LTR. If you’re being completely honest, is the guy you settled down with not at the top of the list sexually vs the guys you pulled in the past? He is unequivocally at the top of the list. That’s why I am still with him and didn’t need to keep dating. When you think of your best sexual experiences ever, is it usually someone from your promiscuous phase? Nope. …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/24 01:44 AM
1

That’s what I did as well, but OP claims women get thousands of matches. How long would all that take you if you had thousands?! I just don’t get how he thinks having thousands of profiles to read and men to talk to would be easier than paying for a date. That sounds tiring to me, paying for a date is just going to work at my job I already would be doing.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/24 01:12 AM
3

OP claims women get thousands of dates by just logging on. They are gonna go out with every one to filter them? Wouldn’t that take a really long time? And being in public for dates means no sex. Sex is one of the more fun parts of dating! This makes it difficult as often I would actually want sex with a date, but not do it for safety reasons. Same with no alcohol- I’m pretty nervous on a date, alcohol helps. Not doing it makes dating harder, for me. I don’t even like alcohol much, but it’s prett…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/24 01:08 AM
17

If I had hundreds/thousands of matches, I’d just filter out the best ones How, exactly? I’ve never had thousands of matches, and it still took me a long time to filter. You have to read every profile, then have some conversations… it’s not an instant thing. It would take weeks to actually filter thousands unless you are just researching and chatting with men 24/7. What techniques do you use to filter the men who want only sex but say they want a relationship from the ones who actually want a rel…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/24 12:43 PM
–

You were oppressed by men. You said so yourself. I never said you personally oppressed anyone. The oppressors are men. It’s a societal concept, not about you individually, although of course you individually experience the consequences of such a system - being oppressed by the patriarchs.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/24 04:43 PM
–

Every woman is a gold digger… Oh yeah? So when do I get my gold? It should be said, without a doubt, that men don’t care what his dates / LTR prospect income is. Really? So you never hear any men complaining about having to pay alimony then, right? Maybe you happen to live in a low cost of living area (or with rich men) and assume all men are the same everywhere? Where I live men absolutely care about their girlfriend’s income because they couldn’t actually afford to live with someone who wanted…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/24 04:39 PM
–

Men are the oppressors. It’s not like I named the concept, glad it seems like you understand it better now though.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/24 03:54 PM
–

I’m sorry your country did that to you. However, your evidence that men are not oppressing people enmasse is that men insist on not allowing women in the military and on starting wars and forcing their male citizens go fight? It sounds like you are just describing part of patriarchy, not something that is evidence against it at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/24 07:23 PM
1

And? That doesn’t mean the patriarchy doesn’t exist. Men being violent to people to get what they want is likely a big part of why it exists.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/24 07:13 PM
3

Just as often as my husband does.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/24 03:46 PM
0

Many places, like Israel, require both men and women to serve in the military.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/24 03:39 PM
6

How often do you have to worry about getting raped, impregnated, and not being allowed to end your pregnancy due to your governments laws forbidding it?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/24 03:37 PM
2

If that’s the entire truth I wouldn’t care.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/24 04:38 PM
1

I’m pretty sure everyone already knew we were fucking before we got married, lol. Yep, those other two are purposes of marriage. Also don’t forget in US you can get access to healthcare from your spouse’s job.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/24 06:42 AM
3

You’re saying these guys are actually super hot and I think they are average looking? If I was single I wouldn’t date any of them, all but one guy was too fat for my tastes, but average American their 40s is fat. If that’s what’s considered really hot now then tastes have changed a lot.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/24 08:04 PM
0

They were average I’m pretty sure. They have average looking girlfriends/wives too. Honestly I wouldn’t even date any of them if I was single (most were too fat for my tastes, average American in their 40s is fat though, I just wouldn’t date average men I guess).
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/24 07:58 PM
1

But I did NOT ask them anything that’s what I’m saying. I asked them nothing and just made an offhand comment like “and we all know it’s hard for men on apps” or something. They could have said nothing and moved on from it. But they all instead seemed surprised and piped up to disagree with me about it. There would have been no need to “admit they struggled with women” or anything like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/24 06:22 PM
2

I mean they didn’t have to say anything at all, I made some offhand comment about it being hard and they seemed generally surprised at it. I don’t think men with wives and girlfriends (who they met online) were worried about being perceived as being incels. They also were friends of my husbands for many years, we knew their ex girlfriends, whereas they also knew my husband didn’t have exes before me (and he was 30 when we started dating), so I just don’t think anyone was worried about me suddenl…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/24 04:30 PM
6

Yes I even mentioned it might just be different for older people, maybe even the ratio isn’t as bad for people in their 40s... I feel like women in their 20s might not need dating apps at all, but in their 40s it’s different as there aren’t as many social hangouts with single people they are going to.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/24 04:13 PM
2

You know I had this same idea… but have you talked about this with anyone irl who are using dating apps?? Because I am wondering if this page is skewing our perception on the current state of dating apps? I was talking with a group of people the other day and I mentioned something about dating apps being hard for men and all the couples were like “what are you talking about? We met online”. I was like “aren’t their way more men than women?” And a guy was like “maybe some, but you just gotta have…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/24 02:40 PM
2

I would personally be worried about what happened to my parents happening to me if we relied on just one income. That’s why I don’t do that. It’s just not ideal for one person to throw their whole career out and rely totally on someone else. It’s additional risk to have rigid gender roles. We were discussing the man working and the other “not having to worry”. Things like the economy are absolutely in scope of that. We don’t live in some kind of utopia where everyone is guaranteed employment sui…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/24 04:08 PM
4

I didn’t say anything about her complaining? I said it wasn’t true you wouldn’t have to worry about finances. She absolutely was worrying about finances when he lost his job, when their house was getting foreclosed on, when they had to declare bankruptcy. She did all the childcare and the children were teenagers (I was actually moved out already, I’m the oldest) by this point - so she put in the work for her role. He paid all the bills when he could, but then a recession happened, no fault of th…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/24 03:06 PM
4

Nope, he didn’t forbid it, they both preferred gender roles. But when there was a recession and he lost his well paying job, she couldn’t get one either despite having a master’s degree, having not worked for over a decade. You unfortunately just aren’t a competitive employee if you become a housewife. She was able to get a couple shitty min wage jobs, but nothing to replace his highly educated one. The result was they lost their house (that they had been paying into for a decade already).
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/24 02:59 PM
0

As a woman, you encounter plenty of dudes of both types during your lifetime. The first sounds a lot more feminist, and egalitarian, but would it be a stretch to say that the second type of man wins you out a lot more often? Definitely not. Traditional men don’t expect you to not work while they do everything, not sure where you got that idea. Instead they expect you to be their maid and nanny and cook and house/calendar manager, and to let them make all the important decisions. Whereas egalitar…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/24 02:49 PM
6

My parents followed those gender roles. I can assure you, it is absolutely NOT the case that when only one person works, the other “never has to worry about finances”. In fact, there is a lot more worrying about it when only one adult is working rather than both, especially when things like recessions happen! Having two means if one person loses their job, the family doesn’t lose 100% of their income.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/08/24 02:27 PM
6

At the end of the day, raising kids should be the purpose of marriage otherwise why marry at all? Why “should” it? You don’t get to declare the purpose of my marriage. We are married because we are best friends and life partners, we don’t need kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/24 02:42 PM
–

There is an ingredient in it that if they get enough will poison them. Small dogs don’t need much, bigger dogs need more. Dark chocolate has much more of it. I’ve seen them get sick, especially little dogs, and have a friend whose dog died getting into her chocolate stash. Sugar isn’t good for them either. Plenty of appropriate treats at pet stores they will love just as much and aren’t poisonous, don’t give chocolate to dogs.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/24 01:47 AM
1

Yeah I didn’t get that one at all. I guess some men think women are only attracted to their hookups, and they get with husbands purely in a sexworker capacity…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/24 05:04 PM
0

No, the option to sue is good for me, I’m not OP, I was just pointing out it still is an issue despite being illegal. That company lost their entire dev team in my city due to their stupidness, but they are a huge international company and it didn’t phase them at all. They just started abusing workers in Texas instead. Fines weren’t even an issue for them anyway - I saw them get fines for all kinds of things as well as abandon multi million dollar projects (after they were finished and paid for)…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/24 04:52 PM
2

I know a few women who have had lawsuits over this. Many women don’t suspect it so don’t ask around what their coworkers are getting paid so never file suit, or don’t want to go through the trouble or have enough proof. I just left a company when I found out they were paying the women less, rather than sue - which cost the people I know who did it a lot of time and money, and not all of them were won. Plenty of employers break laws to save/make money. Hell, my aunt won a lawsuit for this against…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/24 04:08 PM
2

The posts claimed because men pay more taxes, it means they are forced to support women, and that men get no benefit from tax funded government programs.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/24 03:58 PM
1

But even if that were true in my situation (it’s certainly not), it’s not like I waited for marriage to have sex with my husband!
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/24 03:52 PM
1

do you not see, that from the man’s perspective, the casual sex guys got for “free” what husband had to “pay full price for?” No, I don’t see at all. Can you explain? Both my husband and my hookups got sex in exchange for sex, none of them paid me...
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/24 10:44 AM
3

So you are saying women want sexless marriages? Nothing you quoted was an answer to why women would want sexless marriages. You are saying they want marriage of any kind but they proposed to all their ONS but were rejected for being too ugly, so they decided to accept getting married with a man they aren’t even attracted to and so plan to not have sex with? Why would a woman want that? I just don’t think that’s very common. I suspect the women who have this rare problem of being able to fuck hot…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/24 09:54 PM
8

And these women below your league you were fucking out of desperation were begging you to marry them? But you wouldn’t because they liked porn style sex? It’s pretty weird to want to do something sexually that you would be horrified if a woman also wanted it. Essentially you are saying you would never want to marry a woman who is sexually compatible? So when you have sex, you purposely pick ugly women as you feel you won’t get too attached to them or something? This sounds like a complex you per…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/24 09:41 PM
12

When I was young and having casual sex, I absolutely could not fuck guys “higher smv” than myself. The hotness of men I had casual sex with and the ones I had relationships with was about the same. Where does this idea come from?? Your league is what you can get. If you are fucking someone - that is what your smv gets you. I think the relationship league they call “rmv”. I’ve also never once begged a casual partner for marriage and gotten turned down, I didn’t want to marry a single one of them …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/24 04:32 PM
3

I like video games. I don’t like gender roles and I don’t like the assumption that women don’t like video games. Some do and some don’t, just like any hobby. I like a man who wants to play games with me so being into video games is preferable. But also who doesn’t have an addiction or compulsion problem with it and does other things with me as well. Some gamers do it for 8 hours a day and that doesn’t leave enough time to do other things so it’s too extreme for me. This goes for any hobby unless…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/24 01:28 AM
3

Can men and women be “just” friends” Yep, I have always had male friends, and everyone else in my social circle has friends of both genders, so it seems to be quite possible. How do you feel about your SO having friends of the opposite sex? Friends with ex’s? Friends with former FWBs? Fine with me. We were friends before we dated and so have a shared friend group, and we pretty much share all our friends today.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/24 09:38 PM
–

Q4 Egalitarian minded or feminist women: If there were no men or we lived in a female-led culture, do you think you can run the society, keep the civilization alive and gather the qualifications that are expected from men (also be creative and stuff to enhance the life experience)? Sure, I think women can be creative, and can learn anything men can. Since women are looked down upon in some traditional views, i'm asking if you can be interesting, decent and capable as men are? Yes as far as I can…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/24 03:45 PM
17

What do you mean by “environment” here?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/24 03:07 PM
0

That’s why I asked if it was a generational change. Could be cultural too, maybe my employer is less likely to hire people into bad boys or something. Anyway I saw zero evidence in the OP, not sure why I can’t reply to an anecdotal hypothesis with an anecdote of my own and a question if OP thinks it’s a generational thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/24 07:44 PM
5

Who said anything about treating someone differently? Marriage is a legal arrangement, and there are financial implications. You aren’t treating everyone equally in regard to that unless you are marrying everyone you meet? It’s just not very smart to sign something merging finances with someone while not caring about their contribution. Would you start caring when divorce happens and she takes her half? What about if she can’t pay her bills when dating - will you just pay them for her? Assume yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/24 03:38 PM
7

And would you care about alimony and child support when you and the barista divorce? You really wouldn’t mind if a woman said she doesn’t care about anything about you that you care about, and only cared about your hair, say? You wouldn’t worry about going bald? You wouldn’t mind if you worked really hard on something and then when you tell a woman you love about it she says “that’s great honey” in a way that means “I don’t care”? I guess I just like men who are a bit smarter (so not getting int…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/24 03:15 PM
10

When I was 22 I was friends with a nice guy. We’ve now been together 18 years. So seems like in my case, I did want that at 22! Are you saying there is a generational difference and young women today aren’t interested in having a nice partner who is their friend the way they were when I was young? Both the young women on my team at work (21-23) are dating nice men they met in college. I don’t think it’s that unusual to date friendly nice men, even at 22…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/24 02:55 PM
7

I think it’s not exactly the smartest to not care about a woman’s finances, but then want to marry her, combining finances… Then men will complain about their wife spending their money or having to split the money on divorce or having to pay child support. Probably if you are going to legally merge finances with someone - you should care about it?? At least don’t complain about it if you “don’t care”! As well, if a man told me he doesn’t care about my accomplishments and only needs me to be attr…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/24 02:46 PM
8

It seems like men are success + performance objects and some bisexual men said here, as i read today, that they given up on women completely, that men are way better to be partnered with etc. So, there are serious concerns about women's character and nature. If you don't love the men as men love women So you are saying you think women should love men by “giving up on men completely” and having “serious concerns about men’s character and nature”? are you going to let men cast out and found female…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/24 11:32 PM
13

He couldn’t possibly be the same as he is AND be violent, cruel, or untrustworthy. His kindness and chillness are key personality traits of his! One of the things that makes him very compatible with me is that he is very sweet to everyone and doesn’t even raise his voice - I have some trauma from childhood abuse and can’t deal with any yelling or meanness. Also one of my methods of vetting dates was see how they treat waitstaff - not being respectful is a deal breaker for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/24 03:39 AM
–

I’m in that BMI range, but you don’t give me any attention, you always just ignore me. You never even answer a simple question like if you are a healthy (19-21 bmi) man.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/24 07:45 AM
2

I didn’t mean doing something wrong as in immoral. I just meant it was something that can make getting into a relationship an additional challenge. I’m neurodivergent myself and it does have an effect on any social and relationship matters. I haven’t discriminated against anyone, I hire people with mental illnesses or autism.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/24 02:28 AM
–

And those result in divorce being only bad for men? That’s what we are talking about right now.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/24 04:02 PM
-3

I don’t know your friends so I don’t know the answer. Some of my friends were single a long time, and I can answer what they appeared to be doing wrong: not asking anyone out not going anywhere there are women being obese or ugly and asking out hot women who have lots of hot men asking them out mental illness and/or autism No idea if your friends have these same issues, you’d have to observe them.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/24 09:27 AM
–

Women don’t have equal rights in India, and are getting raped and beaten and even murdered at a rate much higher than places like US. So maybe they have made some weird divorce laws there where if she isn’t murdered in an “honor killing” she gets this “maintenance” money… (although your example is again rich people, which isn’t the norm). I really don’t think that makes up for the severe lack of rights and safety she has as a woman in that country enough to claim men are oppressed by divorce.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/24 09:15 AM
–

So there is a substantial pay gap between men and women, and that’s unfair to men?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/24 09:08 AM
22

As a man, if you get married and a woman decides to divorce you, you are fucked. You are going to lose so much shit. Why do you think this is “as a man”? As a woman do I have protection from losing anything in a divorce?? Can you link me the law that is based on gender? Are you just saying only men own “shit” and women own nothing? Personally a divorce would be quite devastating for me, how do I get access to these woman only protections you think we have?? Look at what happened to Brendan Frase…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/24 05:24 AM
10

I am married to a man who was a virgin at 31 when we got together, so I guess yes. He didn’t tell me he was before we had sex, though, he told me about 2 weeks into dating. I do think the reason is relevant. He isn’t an “average man” because 30-40s is not the age average men first have sex. But there are many reasons why it can be the case.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/24 03:42 PM
5

I’m a vegan so I don’t eat chicken or steak. But 2 seconds doesn’t sound right to me, maybe for a microwave meal I guess? It takes us about an hour a day to cook dinner. We don’t really eat microwave meals though, they just don’t taste good to us. Cooking is work for us, if it’s not for you, that’s great, you can cook every day then. We do what works for us, and for us it’s a chore, so we split it up, as that’s how we deal with chores. If you work 80 hours a week I don’t see how you even have an…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/24 08:32 AM
3

Absolutely, it’s not a hard rule for us by any means, if one of us is tired the other will do the chores, or go multiple days in a row if someone is working more, etc. I just mean we want to try to contribute to the chore equally. In the beginning it was mostly just taking turns days we saw each other (and we are out more while dating too) but after years we don’t really keep track or anything, these days I actually cook a bit more days a week while he helps me by cutting things for me (I have i…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/24 07:39 AM
8

Cooking is work, it’s a chore we have to do every day. We’ve been taking turns for many years, it’s just a normal routine now. We don’t even necessarily take exact turns day to day exactly, there are things I like to cook and things he does and based on what we have or who feels like doing it we may cook two days in a row or whatever, and these days I tend to cook 4 days a week and him 3, but he helps me when I cook. But the idea is the same, we try to contribute equally to our meal needs. Me ju…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/24 07:27 AM
20

Seems like a strange tactic to me. Why not just take turns cooking, rather than just not cooking for someone you live with? It’s more work for multiple people to cook than to cook enough for 1 more person. Plus then the other person can cook the next day and you get a break. Not paying bills is crazy, most people can’t afford to do that, it’s not even an option. I haven’t had an issue about being a mommy for my man, but also there isn’t anything I do all of for him like he’s a kid, we either tak…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/24 05:26 AM
14

As someone who was dating 20 years ago, I completely disagree with the assertion that it was taboo 20 years ago. All of my boyfriends then wanted to do it, I didn’t even have to ask.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/24 04:13 AM
1

So you are saying my man is better than me and so we aren’t in an egalitarian relationship? What exactly is it about him that is better? Hypergamy means marrying into a class above your own, which is not the case for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/24 04:06 AM
–

Wow you could run for PM? In US you have to be 35 to be president.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/24 11:22 PM
1

How is my relationship not egalitarian? What is it you think we aren’t doing equally or which one of us do you think isn’t treating the other as an equal?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/24 05:44 AM
1

Why not? We’ve all been friends for 20 years! Individuals in the group see or talk separately sometimes. I don’t really hang out with any friends “privately”, even my best friend, we hang out together with our husbands. But I do chat with ones I’m closer to individually. Are you saying I just don’t have any friends anymore since I’m married to one of my friends and so don’t exclude him from friend activities? Anyway OP doesn’t say anything about “friends you see separately”, he just says you can…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/24 03:31 PM
8

In my friend group we have always just hung out in a mixed gender group, it’s never seemed difficult. Right now my whole group has a long term partner and we always just hang out all together. I’m not falling in love with every friend who is a dude, and I haven’t seen them falling in love with all the girls in the group either.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/24 08:45 PM
11

You said “submissive” and claimed it was easy to be so. I’m asking how that’s easy? Have you tried? And what about not having sex when offered the chance with someone hot while young and single? How often have you turned that down and how easy was it? What is the overanalyzing? These are all very simple questions about your statement that these are easy. I would find it very hard to change my personality and become submissive, I don’t think that’s easy at all. Can you offer any evidence, or even…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 06:19 AM
10

I have a great sexual relationship and we are equal partners, no one has authority over the other. And we have all the fun in bed, not being limited to gender roles of who is allowed to do what position.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 04:28 AM
11

I don’t think OP meant sexually submissive. If “all” women did it - he wouldn’t be saying how women have such a hard time doing it despite it being so easy, he would say all women are already. I’m pretty sure he means like “submit to the man’s authority and he has the final say” not “get penetrated by a dick”.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:19 AM
24

Yet, it seems in my opinion that a women could EASILY become wife/marriage material if she wanted to be. a women who is submissive Why do you think this is easy?? Maybe you are just a more naturally submissive man, so you think that is a trait everyone has and can easily be that way? Not everyone is like you, it would be very hard for me to be “submissive” personally. Can you explain some “easy steps” someone would take to change their personality to be submissive? not promiscuous If you had hot…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/24 03:06 AM
3

So life sucks for a lot of people. I don’t see how making life worse would help that, though, nor do I see how being free is the cause of what makes life miserable. I’m not miserable I can get a job and a bank account just like men - I am unhappy humans have to spend so much of our limited lifetime working just to live in this world. That would be true even if I wasn’t allowed to do it myself, it would just mean I have to starve or become a prostitute if my husband died and I wasn’t able to find…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/24 08:44 PM
–

I’m not clear on what you are saying by “relationships is sex”. Do you mean if there is no sex the relationship isn’t actually a relationship? Or do you mean you don’t want to use the word “sex” and so are using the word “relationship” in place of it, so we should take the question as “what is your goal with sex?” If you mean the first, then my goal was to find a life partner, including an enjoyable sex life, and also an enjoyable friendship. If you mean the second then my goal of sex is a mutua…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/24 08:35 PM
–

Okay well that doesn’t describe my relationship at all, literally the only thing accurate is that I wear pants. So I guess we can go back to my original statement that he likes me and is not faking it. And I think I would know if a man was faking it because I just don’t think most people can hide their disgust for someone and disguise it as love for decades. My question of how would I know was if your claim was true that they were perfectly disguised, but in reality I just don’t think many peopl…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/24 08:02 AM
–

I don’t see the point of asking women if men are secretly hating them but pretending to like them. How would I know? I will say the idea tons of men are these amazing actors pretending to like people they don’t seems pretty wild, and like you have a pretty low view of men. It seems more likely to me that I have been able to accurately tell from my man’s actions that he honestly likes me, is proud to be seen with me, and has not been faking it all this time. High sex drive is not really what I me…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/24 05:43 AM
–

Why would he ask me out if he didn’t like me? Why would he go out in public with me if he was ashamed to be seen with me? And if it’s just about secret opinions of men that don’t affect me in any way, what is OP asking women exactly? I just dated (and married) men who like sex as much as me, so it’s not a problem that I like it. I wouldn’t expect commitment from uptight men as I wouldn’t even want it, I’m fine with only having commitment from a man who likes me. If men are secretly ashamed of me…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/24 03:55 AM
–

What do you count as “promiscuous”?? And why exactly would it mean someone doesn’t take me seriously? Are men taken seriously even when they like to fuck? I’ve had casual sex and never had any boyfriends complain about that tbh, I think the men I dated rather liked that I was generally horny and really into sex. My husband certainly never expressed an issue with “taking me seriously” that I’ve noticed, and he definitely isn’t ashamed to be seen with me, more like the opposite. I guess the answer…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/24 03:19 AM
2

I make way more than my partner. I’ve never once had anyone tell me I was “dating down” or that I “don’t know my own worth”. Who exactly is saying that? Is it conservatives? They are really into gender roles, but not everyone is, I don’t really hang out with people all strict about gender roles as they are judgmental and sexist.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/24 03:03 AM
1

Absolutely none of my past boyfriends or my husband would date a fat woman or a woman who was politically right either, so seems men do have that option to refuse to date people they don’t like. But regardless, egalitarian doesn’t mean “date anyone who wants you even if you don’t like them”... It means I have an egalitarian relationship, where we are both considered equals, rather than one of us being superior to the other, and we have equal say in decisions, rather than having a leader or boss.…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/24 06:14 PM
1

Where was I discriminating anyone? I would only want to be with people I am attracted to, I get along with, and who share morals and values with me. It’s not discrimination for me to not be willing to have a relationship with someone. I would hire people who are politically right or fat, I just wouldn’t marry them. Not being fat and having shared values is not in any way “insane standards”. I am not fat and not politically right, so it seems like fair expectations to me, and they have been met j…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/24 03:11 AM
5

Well I’ve been told by most men that most women are submissive sexually, even if she’s not outside of the bedroom. Femdom is popular with men, and part of going to sexworkers for that is that it’s hard for them to find sexual partners with the same kink. Sex workers do what makes them money, what their customers want, so things popular with men are more likely than things popular with women. I am not submissive outside of the bedroom at all, it’s a kink thing only for me. Outside of that I am to…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/24 04:50 AM
5

What?? Most people say usually women are submissive, this is the first time I ever heard someone claim the opposite lmao. Everything I’ve heard in the kink communities is that it is hard for submissive men to find female doms, because there are more sub men than dom women. Not sure why you are surprised anyway, you don’t know us or anything lol. Although people who do might surprised be also, because he is shy and I am not. I love it, I have a thing for quiet shy guys who are super kinky behind …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/24 04:33 AM
5

No dom/sub is more my kink actually (I’m sub). I like him to boss me around and force intense sensations on me and he likes to do kinky things to me, so it works out well together.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/24 04:25 AM
3

Bought him his dream waterfront house on an island. I do mostly any fetish thing he wants as long as it’s not painful or dangerous. He has some kinks that can be taboo and he felt embarrassed about, but I was always open to them. And he likes some things I can’t even do but we found toys and ways to fantasize together to help fulfill those desired scenarios. I’m sure there are women who have died for their partners in history.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/24 03:32 AM
1

Sure, as long as it’s fair and something we both agree to. If I was to get married to someone else at my age now, I would probably want one. But when I actually got married we just owned our house together and had no other assets of our own, so we didn’t need one. My aunt did one where it only applies if you divorce within a certain time (hers was 5 years I think) which seems like a decent option also if you want to eventually merge everything, but not until you have been together long enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/24 08:40 AM
–

-vacuum I have a robot vacuum, so hardly ever. I will vacuum the dog hair off the stairs occasionally. -mop As needed if there is a spill in the kitchen, pretty rarely otherwise (considering getting a robot mop too) -dust I mean if I see something needing it I might do it… Probably like twice a year? -wash the windows Never, my husband does it. -clean the toilet As needed, maybe a once or twice a week. -clean the mirrors As needed, not often. -clean the bathroom sink As needed, main bathroom may…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/24 03:50 PM
–

Planned parenthood is not allowed to use public funding on abortions, they use donations only. People are allowed to donate to whatever they want, it doesn’t have to be about things that are related to what you think are needs. Planned parenthood uses public funding for other reproductive health services - and people have reproductive organs and need healthcare for them whether they have sex or not. Society also has an interest in keeping the population healthy and preventing the spread of disea…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/24 03:20 PM
3

My man was inexperienced before me and he wasn’t bitter or jaded. I think that might be more a red flag of someone who identifies as an incel than just someone who happens to be inexperienced. We were all inexperienced once.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/24 07:29 AM
7

I love them. I have a thing for hairy men. Long beards get in the way and start to look unkempt, so trimmed is preferred. Even just a 5 o’clock shadow is hot.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/24 06:55 PM
1

Besides a “feeling” beating someone up and caressing them gently are the same!
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/24 07:55 PM
2

Sure, and morals, values, the experience. If you are a sociopath and don’t care about those things then it might seem like no difference. Most people can tell (and yes I suppose this is can feel) the difference between a friend and someone they are paying to be hang out with them. I have no idea how to explain any better to someone who has a mental condition severe enough they don’t get the difference, I would recommend talking to a therapist who specializes in that for better understanding, it’…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/24 04:10 PM
2

Why do men want women who have boobs instead of male chests if that isn’t superior? Men are not superior to women because they are taller. Just as women are not superior to men because they have better functioning mammary glands or wider hips. Straight people tend to be attracted to human’s sexually dimorphic traits. It has nothing to do with superiority.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/24 04:04 PM
2

If I pay someone to go to the theme park with me, that doesn’t feel the same as going with a friend who wants to do it with me and not only doesn’t require me to pay her, but offers to pay for lunch. If you don’t get the difference, you are extremely unusual and possibly have some kind of brain condition making you not experience feelings the same as most humans tend to. Women who require money to have sex with you are not having sex because they sexually desire you or love you, if it comes off …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/24 02:46 AM
2

Not striving for marriage doesn’t necessarily mean “wants to move on”. I never strived for marriage, it’s just legal stuff for me, I did it when it made sense for my situation financially and legally, it wasn’t some kind of life goal I strived for. My partner and I were committed years before marriage, we didn’t need the government for that part. And I certainly wouldn’t want a public proposal that sounds awful, I prefer discussing it like adults and keeping our business private. And not sure ho…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/24 02:22 AM
6

Enthusiastic consent and desire. You valuing married women who have “public proposals” sounds like a personal problem for you, no one else cares about that. If someone did that to me it would just prove they don’t even know me at all, no thanks. I don’t mind being considered low value by men like you who don’t even know the difference between paying someone to pretend they like you and someone actually enjoying time with you, as I would never want a man like that so their opinion is irrelevant. …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/24 11:52 PM
6

I am not doing more just because I am earning more. I work for a giant company that pays more. He runs our small business we own, and before that worked for a small business. Small businesses can’t pay as much as mega corporations, but it’s not like it’s less work. Expecting him to spend his free time cleaning up after me trying to make up for my income somehow sounds like he’d be my maid. I’d rather we spend our free time together, because I enjoy hanging out with him.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/24 05:49 PM
5

I make a lot more and we divide chores up based on time available, not income. Because I want to spend free time with my partner, I don’t want him to be my maid because I earn more.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/24 04:41 PM
5

And expect him to do the chores because he makes less? Men are already made by other men to feel bad if they make less than their partner, you think we should make them feel worse and insist they become maids also even if they work full time?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/24 04:37 PM
5

Two people who can afford a house does not equal enough money for a private plane and pilot lmao.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/24 04:34 PM
3

I was replying to the claim height meant someone is superior because it’s “considered more attractive on average”. I am saying the presence of female breasts is actually a more attractive trait than height on women. I’ve never seen men obsess about height, but quite a few of them are into boobs. Most men wouldn’t want a woman with a male chest instead of boobs, but have no problem with short women.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/24 04:23 PM
4

Ok, but you were acting like I wasn’t being sympathetic to men who treat women as equals and have trouble dating. I see nothing I said that even seemed related to that. And OP is not one of those men, so if anything I wasn’t being sympathetic to a man who doesn’t see women as equals. It’s frustrating to date for a lot of people, for a variety of reasons. It was very hard for me to realize how few men were interested in an egalitarian relationship, or how many men wanted to use my boobs as some k…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 11:59 PM
-1

Where was I being dishonest? I truly don’t believe being taller than someone makes them “superior”. Men who don’t treat women as their equals also have trouble dating. You can find posts by men who have trouble dating about how women don’t like they are conservative, or how no women are into cooking anymore, or how hard it is to find women who don’t “act like men” by enjoying casual sex, or how men can’t find anyone but career women or single moms to date, or about how awful “modern women” are f…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 11:18 PM
18

Having boobs is considered attractive much more than height for women. People being attracted to traits of the opposite gender is just called being straight. If you think male traits are superior, then you think women being straight means they want someone superior. But if you believe those traits are not superior then you wouldn’t see any issue with people wanting someone their equal who is also the opposite gender.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 06:02 PM
21

Why do you think being taller makes you physically superior? I think having functional mammary glands makes you physically superior, sure - it has the ability to feed babies without even needing cups or bowls! How about having a uterus - literally being able to create new human beings. That sounds physically superior to me. Why do men say they want to be superior but then want physically superior beings who have the superior ability to make the next generation and keep the human race going. When…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 05:55 PM
12

How would getting married give you a legacy or prevent you from getting forgotten??? Is my husband supposed to be building a statue of me?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 05:45 PM
46

Why do you think men being taller than women means they are “superior”??? Why do men want women who are “superior” to them by having larger mammary glands?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 05:42 PM
1

This is something I certainly say, as for me, it’s very important, so I’ll say what I mean by it. I mean I want a man who has some shared interests with me so we can enjoy hanging out together. I want a man who is my friend. My husband and I have a lot in common. We met at an internship when we were both in school getting a 3d art degree, so we both had an interest in that. We both like nature and enjoy hiking, camping, kayaking together. We both like sci-fi and enjoy reading books and talking a…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 04:18 PM
4

I mean, if you are a lawyer maybe. But you think doctors are disagreeable? There’s lots of high paying jobs where collaboration is important. I’m like top 5% of earners and my company considers “works well with others” as a mandatory trait.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/24 10:13 PM
3

Most men expect women to give birth. That’s a pretty high expectation in my book, so I disagree completely I don’t have as much pressure - for me earning money is actually a much easier task than being pregnant and birthing and raising multiple children would be. I had trouble finding a man who didn’t have this expectation. My man doesn’t earn high, so both of us were able to find people who didn’t have the typical expectations, it’s possible to be picky and keep searching for the right person i…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/24 10:09 PM
5

Why do you think career women would have different reasons than career men? I have a successful career and my purpose is only to provide a better life for my husband and I, not some kind of status or stuff. Things we enjoy doing cost money and we want to live somewhere safe and enjoyable. We drive a 30 year old car, we don’t care about “showing off”. But we have a house on the water where we can go kayaking and hiking out back, it’s our dream life and was only possible because I worked to get it…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/24 09:25 PM
7

Only the last one was politically left, and he was overweight and uninterested in physical activity. The artist was maybe slightly closer to something acceptable, especially because of being introverted and analytical but “somewhere in the middle” politically in US is not going to be aligned with me, since the “right” in this country right now is so far away from any of my values. Plus being a slob is gross and totally unacceptable, and being 7” shorter than me is probably going to be unattracti…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/24 08:48 PM
7

It’s 100% incompatible with me, I don’t care how many people the group contains.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/24 08:40 PM
3

I mean, my husband appreciates if I do that as well. Especially in my area of expertise, and I appreciate it if he does it in his. And for things neither of us are experts on we want to hear the other’s opinion - we are very aligned with our goals and values so usually if someone disagrees it’s because there is a reason that the other person was missing. We just explain our reasons to each other and then are able to come to an agreement. It’s not being “disagreeable” it’s taking advantage of the…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/24 08:36 PM
19

I have a successful career, and I don’t get the claim we’d have to be “disagreeable” at work??? What? That’s not how it works at all, me being easy to get along with is one of the things brought up as a positive when I get promotions. (Last review I was told how multiple people expressed a desire to work with me as I was pleasant to work with and they are able to learn a lot from me.) When I do disagree it’s usually pushing back on insane requests from non technical people and my boss and team g…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/24 07:22 PM
51

None of these men would be compatible with me and I would be single over any of these guys. Never would I ever get with someone who considered themselves in any way “politically right” and someone overweight who dislikes any kind of exercise wouldn’t be able to do the things I like to do with me, we just wouldn’t have a lifestyle in common and I would not be attracted to them. Those seem to be the only two options you have presented.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/24 07:19 PM
–

Yes, two people I know have died giving birth. Also some who nearly did, my mother included (with my little brother), or who the baby died. And many, many, many who have life-long medical consequences from it. I would say out of women I know who had kids, less had no serious medical issues than who did. Death is one of the possibilities, but there are many more very serious ones that can result from being pregnant and giving birth. But there are tons more - if someone was permanently injured due…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/24 07:00 AM
5

I suppose the majority of people just aren’t compatible with me? Also I found men my age on dating sites when I was dating (17-23) mostly wither wanted casual relationships or they wanted like 5 kids for some reason. And lots of men were very controlling, whereas I have an almost pathological need for autonomy and just wanted a partner, not a father. Also a lot of the things you mentioned, you have to be perfect in the beginning or they drop you and move on, or they judge you for your sexual des…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/24 09:19 PM
7

I don’t? It was very difficult for me, and I highly doubt men have it easier. I hope I never have to date again.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/24 09:01 PM
–

I’m pretty sure they need more disposable humans for their wars, and that it’s not actually about ideology, marriage, or divorce, they need more humans as they are killing off a huge amount. They need enough humans to both keep their economy going and enough extra to keep sending so many to their death. Who in their right mind would want to have a son in Russia right now?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/24 07:25 PM
2

I have no problems with them, it all depends on the situation. If it is anything about income percentage distributions, it does seem to require you know what incomes you will be making in the future, which isn’t something I knew when I got married. I might get one if I had to remarry now, because I’d be coming in with assets already and am already established in my career, but I had no idea when I was younger what I would be making (I never imagined in my life I’d be making what I am tbh) and we…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/24 07:10 PM
5

I agree that should be the “default”, however I want to mention childcare IS a financial contribution, and real life has things happen that aren’t the same for everyone. What if one person is a teacher or something and makes the same amount childcare would cost? Some couples might want to have that person do the childcare directly rather than working a whole job and then spending 100% of that money to have someone else do it. The financial contribution would be equal both ways. Or what if a kid …
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/24 01:10 PM
12

If he likes her and wants a relationship, and she likes him and wants a relationship, they should have one. If either one doesn’t want one, they don’t. I don’t think how average a man is really has any relevance. You also haven’t presented any logical reason he should not have a relationship if he’s found someone he wants one with and she wants it back - how would it benefit him to do the opposite of what he wants to do?? And if he doesn’t want a relationship, obviously he shouldn’t have one. I …
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/24 04:55 AM
10

Well it might have been more common years ago, but also no fault divorce wasn’t as common, so with this post they are just suggesting to do what is already done. It’s 10% of divorces in US and decreasing.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/24 04:08 AM
4

I think you are misunderstanding “be her friend first”. The real advice is more like “get more female friends” - being social and meeting women are how you could meet someone and fall in love organically. It may not even be with the female friend, but she invited you to things where you meet women, or you join a group of friends who have things in common and meet friends of friends. Or maybe you have a real friend (ie you really were both friends, not a strategy for the man to date her) and then…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/24 02:23 AM
40

That would be like 90% of divorces. Alimony is rare.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/24 11:54 PM
4

Really depends on the cause of a dead bedroom. Is it because someone has gotten fat and unattractive? Then they might try to change their diet and work out. Is it because someone is too stressed out and busy to be able to relax? Then maybe the other partner needs to pick up some slack, or the stressed out person needs to change jobs or there needs to be some other change to address the issue. Is it because aging and changing hormones or ED? Maybe there is a medical solution or there needs to be …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/24 05:00 PM
3

I agree. But I think the statistic is about PIV specifically with no clit stimulation. So a statistic that might not be relevant in most real situations.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/24 03:13 AM
7

Right. I’m saying when purple possum is saying most women he had sex with came with PIV sex, that it was cumming “during” rather than exclusively “from”.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/24 02:25 AM
9

I think the number is about women who can cum while getting only PIV but no clitoris stimulation at the same time. Lots of women who cum from PIV sex also have clit activity at the same time (from his pelvis, hands, balls etc).
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/24 01:49 AM
2

I believe it. Doesn’t make my situation “tutorial mode” just because other situations are also hard.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/24 09:30 PM
4

How would carrying a gun help with inappropriate male behavior? I carried a taser, but I wasn’t gonna use it on men just being inappropriate, I’d probably get arrested. It was for if my safety was being threatened. You actually think women should use a gun and murder men who catcall them?? My most common outfit for harassment was just work clothes. Seemed more about opportunity (like being on public transit during commute time) than my outfit.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/24 10:05 PM
2

If you haven’t been in a position where you are harassed all the time to the point you want to hide your body just to get it to stop, I don’t think you are in a place to know how easy it is to go through or be jealous about it. The main thing about me attracting men was highly fetishized, but extremely painful to me, and there was nothing I could do to hide myself enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/24 09:21 PM
24

I tried this in my 20s, had my hair clipped, not even a pixie, just shaved right down, purple hair, baggy clothes, no makeup. It didn’t repel men at all, it just made them ask me if I was a lesbian when I rejected them. And my now husband asked me out. Lol total failure at man repelling.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/24 04:01 PM
1

The criteria are that it’s something we both enjoy doing together?? Obviously he has criteria too for what he would enjoy. Am I paying for sex by meeting the criteria of being clean and attractive and straight and enjoying the same kind of sex? Or we are both just paying each other with sex?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/24 10:34 PM
4

No. We promised to be partners. I don’t just dump someone I love because I get a raise at work. I also don’t suddenly expect them to be a slave cleaning all night because of that. We contribute in the ways we are able, I have a career that pays a lot more in some companies, so I’m able to contribute more financially. I chose to live in a house outside of his price range because that’s where I want to live if I have enough money to do so. He covers a reasonable amount and I cover our increased st…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/24 06:40 PM
9

So if I make 5x what my husband does, he should have to do 5x of the chores to “make it up”? So after we both work 8 hours, if I cook dinner (1 hr), he should clean the house for 5 hours?? Why would I want him to be cleaning all night rather than hanging out with me? I don’t even think him cleaning all night would make up the money in any way. It wouldn’t cost what I make to have a house cleaner... I worked to get this money so we could enjoy our time together, not so he could be a slave trying …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/24 05:51 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter