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OCBOA704 Archive

View 1 post and 55 comments by OCBOA704 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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6

OCBOA704/r/askMRP31/05/22 07:21 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
2

OYS #9 Age: 49 Married: 18 Years Children: 2 sons Ht/Wt: 5'9", 228 (from 280) BF%: 34.5% (BIA scale, from 42+%) Lifts (AMRAP): OHP 92.5 (x8), BP 120 (x9), SQ 180 (x7), DL 165 (x6) Read: NMMNG (X2), MMSLP (X2), MAP, WOTSM, SGM, WISNIFG Reading: The Happiness Trap Mission: Placeholder: Be a high value man with options. Absence: It's been about 6 weeks since my last OYS. Lifting and Diet: In my last OYS, I wrote about how I was struggling with lifting. My lifts were not only stalled, but decreasing…
/r/MarriedRedPill02/08/22 08:07 PM
1

Diet I've posted this in the past, my goal 2150 which is a 500 calorie deficit from my TDEE of 2650. That said, my TDEE calculation must not be entirely correct. I've been consistently losing ~1.75 lbs./week which would indicate an actual deficit closer to 875. I've been dieting consistently since mid-February. However, I didn't consistently meal prep until last week. Breakfast is egg muffins. Lunch has been chicken, rice, and steamed vegetables. Dinner doesn't get prepped. ​ Dude, we're all dea…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/06/22 05:00 PM
2

I did manage to learn something from the good advice I got from my post in the retard section.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/06/22 04:30 PM
2

What is your opinion of Digital Minimalism? Social media, online distractions, doomscrolling, and FOMO are all huge problems of mine.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/06/22 04:45 PM
2

OYS #9 Age: 49 Married: 18 Years Children: 2 sons Ht/Wt: 5'9", 236 (from 280) BF%: 35.7% (BIA scale, from 42+%) Lifts (AMRAP): OHP 85 (x10), BP 115 (x10), SQ 170 (x7), DL 165 (x6) Read: NMMNG (X2), MMSLP (X2), MAP, WOTSM, SGM, WISNIFG Mission: Placeholder: Be a high value man with options. Lifting, Regression, & Injuries: I'm struggling with lifting. Last week I de-loaded my deadlift per GSLP. I reduced the weight 15% from 195 to 165. I'm not seeing progression. I'm seeing regression. A month ag…
/r/MarriedRedPill21/06/22 03:54 PM
0

I took it off the table. The sick part was the biggest component of my statement. She caught bronchitis on our camping trip and has been hacking up a lung for two weeks. There was nothing even remotely attractive about it.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/06/22 08:06 PM
1

OYS #8 Age: 49 Married: 18 Years Children: 2 sons Ht/Wt: 5'9", 236 (from 280) BF%: 35.7% (BIA scale, from 42+%) Lifts (AMRAP): OHP 97.5 (x5), BP 122.5 (x6), SQ 185 (x5), DL 195 (x4) Read: NMMNG (X2), MMSLP (X2), MAP, WOTSM, SGM, WISNIFG Reading: Re-read NMMNG sections on covert contracts. Mission: Placeholder: Be a high value man with options. Restarting: I had a little bit of an epiphany after my last OYS and retard section post. I've been LARPing. Other than lifting, dieting, and a little bit …
/r/MarriedRedPill14/06/22 05:28 PM
2

Thank you for your help all. There's significant overlap in the comments, so I'll address them here instead of individually. It was a covert contract. I don't know why I'm so blind to this, but EVERYONE agrees. I'll re-read the sections of NMMNG and look out for them in the future. I handled it poorly. No disagreement there. The sad commentary is I handled it better than I normally would have. If nothing else, next time I'll STFU. I should have made better use of my time. I read while she was go…
/r/askMRP01/06/22 06:53 PM
1

Thank you for your comments.
/r/askMRP01/06/22 06:19 PM
1

FWIW, that was a I'm fucked because I have a lot of work to do. Not an I'm fucked because I'm a victim.
/r/askMRP01/06/22 06:19 PM
1

Where was your ATV when you got back? At the campsite in the middle of Bumfuck, Idaho. There was no problem there. ​ Good call, your instinct was correct this is rule 9 material. Perhaps spend some time considering why you keep getting rule 9'd... There's no doubt I'm deep in my wife's frame. I admitted to that in my OYS #1. It was also somewhat of a misunderstanding of Rule 9 on my part. In both cases (one threat, one actual ban), I thought I was describing growth in relation to her actions. My…
/r/askMRP01/06/22 06:15 PM
1

They all ride motorcycles. It doesn't interest her at all. If anything she thinks it makes getting together challenging for the hobbies we all share (like camping).
/r/askMRP01/06/22 06:04 PM
-1

... and I will be for many more months.
/r/MarriedRedPill01/06/22 12:55 AM
4

Just keep grinding to build the person you want to be. All of the extraneous shit is just that: extra. Don’t waste mental energy even thinking about it. Thank you so very much. This is exactly what I needed to hear. Every word I write here (and on my OYS) is for one of three reasons: 1) Seeking external validation. I either wanted someone to tell me that I was right to be angry or to tell me I did a great job at not acting butthurt. 2) Avoiding getting called out. Thank you to u/Ubermensch33 for…
/r/askMRP01/06/22 12:02 AM
1

Since there were were three friends that went on the ride with her, I'm not sure I have to tell you what I would have done. I can tell you what I did... I didn't say shit to them. Even after it came up on another ride a couple of days later ("too bad you didn't make the last ride"). I have a huge scarcity mentality when it comes to friendship. Coincidentally, this was linked to another post today. I was angry because I'm insecure about my status among my friends. This conversation on my last OYS…
/r/askMRP31/05/22 10:51 PM
-1

I've always had big covert contract problems, particularly when it comes to sex. Maybe I'm just blind to it when it comes to this, but I really don't think so. Her reaction to this (from the OP) would indicate it wasn't covert as well: I also told her that I must not have made myself clear the night before about planning to take an ATV ride Coincidentally, I re-read the NMMNG sections on covert contracts when I was waiting for her.
/r/askMRP31/05/22 09:17 PM
-1

I took it in the way it was intended. My wife fits the "muddy girl" camouflage aesthetic. We would never be able to have a side-by-side because she would always want to drive.
/r/askMRP31/05/22 09:07 PM
-1

You are absolutely right about this: Just think about how much ego that is - that you CAME BACK AFTER 2 WEEKS TO MAKE SURE I KNEW you were doing the work. How little frame you have. You asked me what evidence I had. There it was. Two weeks ago, my answer would have been pretty good. Today it looks stupid. ​ I have a tougher time with this: I understand it's annoying when guys call you fat over and over again and you can only do so much about it. On my OYS #1 or 2, I can understand. If I was obli…
/r/MarriedRedPill31/05/22 09:00 PM
-4

If it wasn't said explicitly, it's a covert contract and you only have yourself to blame for that. I see what you are saying, but I don't entirely agree. ATV rides were a lot of the purpose of the trip. Even loading the ATV makes it pretty overt that if the weather is nice enough, we are going to ride. ​ And then when she got back you rewarded her with verbal intercourse and told her explicitly that she got to you... I've wasted too much time trying to figure out if it was purposeful or just inc…
/r/askMRP31/05/22 08:22 PM
0

She certainly does like that.
/r/askMRP31/05/22 08:04 PM
1

How is your relationship with your daughter? I noticed you haven't talked about it in a few weeks.
/r/MarriedRedPill31/05/22 08:03 PM
1

bf unknown (getting wildly variable values using Navy method day to day, need a better method) Short of a DEXA scan, any method is going to vary wildly. My BIA scale (which is a decent one) can swing 3% in any given day. Either use a 7 day average or only look at the trend.
/r/MarriedRedPill31/05/22 07:36 PM
0

I caught a 2 week ban, but wanted to reply to this. Here is your evidence: OYS #1 Ht/Wt: 5'9", 254 (from 280) OYS #6 Ht/Wt: 5'9", 243 (from 280)
/r/MarriedRedPill31/05/22 07:29 PM
1

OYS #7 Age: 49 Married: 18 Years Children: 2 sons Ht/Wt: 5'9", 241 (from 280) BF%: 33.9% (BIA scale, from 42+%) Lifts (AMRAP): OHP 90 (x7), BP 120 (x8), SQ 175 (x6), DL 185 (x6) Read: NMMNG (X2), MMSLP (X2), MAP, WOTSM, SGM, WISNIFG Reading: Haven't read shit since my last OYS. Mission: Placeholder: Be a high value man with options. Rule 10: I'm back after a Rule 10 violation, so it's been two weeks. Health / Attractiveness: I lifted 3 of 3 planned days both weeks. I hit a squat PR on Thursday. …
/r/MarriedRedPill31/05/22 07:23 PM
1

You label yourself fat and lazy and reference “lack of leadership” a few times. While no doubt objectively true... Oh, it's objectively true: Ht/Wt: 5'9", 243 (from 280) BF%: 35.5% (BIA scale, from 42+%) ​ ...it seems like either an attempt to get ahead of being called out ... This is what it is. Every response to my first few OYS was about what a fat fuck I am. I know I'm a fat fuck, so let me go ahead and cut you off at the pass. I'm grinding hard at it, but 100 lbs doesn't come off overnight.…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/05/22 11:52 PM
1

I have had HUGE problems with covert contracts in the past. I thought I was largely over them. That said, you're right. Maybe not so much on the smooth mornings. He's been wanting to improve. I have held him back using the excuse of "lack of trust". On the sex, you're absolutely right. Fixing the logistics doesn't fix the underlying problems. I was going to initiate tonight. My wife is coming off shark week. I lack outcome independence, and I was setting myself up for butthurt. Thank you.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/05/22 08:55 PM
1

My youngest son (16) is seemingly incapable of getting himself to bed at a decent hour or getting himself up in the morning. To expand on this. It's been allowed to happen because of my laziness and lack of leadership. Not my lack of ability.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/05/22 06:17 PM
1

You are delusional, dude. I'm not so deluded to not understand that I'm fat and unattractive. Which are the biggest hinderance to me getting laid more. That said, sleeping arrangements in my home are a huge logistical problem. I can get laid in a hotel. I can get laid in our camper, and I can get laid when my son is gone for the night (almost never). I wrote in my OYS #5 about a quickie when my son was in the shower and about a BJ in this OYS. They were quick and more importantly quiet. The drun…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/05/22 06:04 PM
2

OYS #6 Age: 49 Married: 18 Years Children: 2 sons Ht/Wt: 5'9", 243 (from 280) BF%: 35.5% (BIA scale, from 42+%) Lifts (AMRAP): BP 105 (x12), OHP 85 (x9), SQ 160 (x7), DL 145 (x10) Read: NMMNG (X2), MMSLP (X2), MAP, WOTSM, SGM, WISNIFG Reading: Haven't read shit this week. Watched some WhineMorePlease's OYS videos. Mission: Placeholder: Be a high value man with options. Rule 9: I'm back from a Rule 9 violation after having been warned about it the previous week. I had it coming. Mindset: Two week…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/05/22 03:41 PM
2

I've got a family obligation. Will it stay up on YouTube after it's over, or does it need to be watched live?
/r/MarriedRedPill03/05/22 10:02 PM
1

OYS #5 Age: 49 Married: 18 Years Children: 2 sons Ht/Wt: 5'9", 245 (from 280) BF%: 36.4% (BIA scale, from 42+%) Lifts: BP 90 (x13), SQ 130 (x10), DL 110 (x9) Read: NMMNG (X2), MMSLP (X2), MAP, WOTSM, SGM, WISNIFG Reading: NMMNG with BFA's, Lots of top posts this week. Mission: Placeholder: Be a high value man with options. Health / Attractiveness: I've slipped a little on my diet this week. I had an average deficit of 460 calories/day below my goal of 500. This was caused exclusively by a night …
/r/MarriedRedPill03/05/22 03:51 PM
2

HEALTH: Went to the doctor to get a sleep study ordered. I'm pissed as hell that I might have sleep apnea. I don't want a fucking machine on my face but I'm sick of shitty sleep that fucks up my ability to perform in all areas of life. I've posted this a few times (including in this thread), but CPAP has absolutely changed my life. It's expansive. Wearing the mask sucks. Cleaning shit daily/weekly sucks. Not stopping breathing literally 55 times an hour (in my case) is fucking awesome. Not havin…
/r/MarriedRedPill01/05/22 07:07 PM
1

I think I just overdid it. I had been doing a PPL (lifting MWF) from r/fitness. I alternated between deadlifting 1X5 and bent over rows 5x5 on pull day (basically once every other week for both). On leg day I squatted 5X5 and Romanian deadlifted 3X12. After having taken 3 weeks off, I switched to a upper/lower split. On Tuesday, I deadlifted 3x6 (@175 lbs, 10 lbs off my previous weight) and Romanian deadlifted 3X12. On Thursday I bent over rowed 3x8, and on Friday I squatted 4x8. It was just too…
/r/MarriedRedPill28/04/22 04:19 PM
1

You need to lose 70 more. Until you've lost the first 50 of those, focusing on that over anything else will always be your best ROI. I appreciate this. Much has been said to me about lifting goals. It's hard to focus on those when I've got so much fat to cut first.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/04/22 03:33 PM
1

Figure out if I have sleep apnea. Not getting great sleeps. Might need a new mattress. Poor sleep is a major issue with energy levels. If you snore and especially if you wake up gasping for breath, don't delay getting an at-home sleep study done. They are pretty painless and relatively inexpensive (<$1000 in my case). One of the two major CPAP manufacturers issued a recall for millions of machines last year. As a result, waits for machines have been really long. Getting my sleep apnea treated ha…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/22 08:51 PM
1

You aren't hurting your back because you lift heavy, you are hurting your back because you are overweight and weak. I think you should focus more on your training. Agreed on all counts. I mentioned last week or the week before how I've been floundering and half-assing since November. I started taking training seriously at my OYS #2 using a routine I wasn't ready for which led to the injury. Since then, I've switched to GSLP which seems better suited. I've got 25 years of sitting on my fat ass to…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/22 08:15 PM
1

I clearly have a deep wife focus. I tried (maybe poorly) to own up to that fact. The point of my post was that my need for external validation and lack of outcome independence was bad and something I needed to work on.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/22 07:42 PM
1

I rounded up on my age. I turn 49 next month. So I've got a year plus which should be more than enough time to shed the weight and strengthen.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/04/22 05:58 PM
3

OYS #4 Age: 49 Married: 18 Years Children: 2 sons Ht/Wt: 5'9", 247 (from 280) BF%: 36.2% (BIA scale, from 42+%) Lifts: BP 85 (x16), SQ 110 (x10), DL 100 (x9) Read: NMMNG (X2), MMSLP (X2), MAP, WOTSM, SGM, WISNIFG Reading: NMMNG with BFA's Mission: Placeholder: Be a high value man with options. Health / Attractiveness: My diet continues to go well. I had an average calorie deficit of 567 calories (goal 500). I changed my lifting program last week to Phrak's Greyskull LP. I like the well-defined w…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/04/22 03:18 PM
1

Was this directed to me?
/r/MarriedRedPill21/04/22 06:53 PM
1

I'm really struggling to come up with an ultimate goal for lifting. There are really two reasons. First, I've got 60-70 lbs of fat to lose first. Strength and weightlifting goals seem subordinate to that. It's like asking someone with $200K in credit card debt how much of a down payment they are going to put on a vacation home. Second is I was born with a birth defect (Poland's Syndrome). Along with some skeletal deformities, I'm missing the lower 2/3 of one pectoral muscle. While I have full fu…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/04/22 04:41 PM
1

It is worth mentioning. It's terrible, we all agree Do you have an opinion on bio impedance scales? ​ What's your lifting program? I'm changing my lifting program tonight to Phrak's Greyskull LP. I've been half-assing the r/fitness PPL since mid-November. However, I never really felt like I was getting enough volume with it. Last week I decided to try an upper/lower split. I worked hard, and had the opposite problem. Squatting, bent over rows, RDLs, and greatly increased deadlifts volume (4x6 vs…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/04/22 10:52 PM
1

Paging ImpatientZen, looks like redside_up and I have a challenger. I don't get the reference, but I can imagine. ​ > BF%: Fat as fuck. First we measure it, then we fix it. Calculate it for next week. Oh, I've calculated it - 37% (Navy). It's so far out of the reference range, it's not worth mentioning. As I said last week, I'm starting in a deep hole that's going to take a long time to dig myself out of. ​ What's your TDEE? TDEE is 2,748. I've been eating an average of 2,227 calories since mid-…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/04/22 10:29 PM
1

FINANCES Failing this completely too. I strongly recommend YNAB. Since August, I've used it to pay down ~$25K in debt. There's a free 34 day trial. After that it's not inexpensive ($15/month, cheaper on an annual basis). I would forgo piano lessons for YNAB instead. For that price, you and your wife could both use it (and keep a joint budget, and two separate budgets if you wanted). It's more of a system with software that supports it. There's quite a learning curve, but they have excellent help…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/04/22 06:11 PM
1

OYS #3 Age: 49 Married: 18 Years Children: 2 sons Ht/Wt: 5'9", 252 (from 280) BF%: Fat as fuck. Lifts: BP 105 (x8), SQ 125 (x8), DL 175 (x5) Read: NMMNG (X2), MMSLP (X2), MAP, WOTSM, SGM Reading: WISNIFG Mission: I'm still defining my mission. In the meantime I'll use u/RStonePT's temporary mission suggestion from here: Be a high value man with options. Health / Attractiveness: My diet is going well. I have a goal of maintaining an average daily deficit of 500 calories per day. Last week I avera…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/04/22 04:00 PM
1

And yes, a tire change is whetever you want it to be. I'm just saying that in the same way lifting provides many benefits, so can getting your hands dirty. I've discovered that for myself, but it may not be as applicable to as many people. I'm probably the prototypical BP guy. Middle aged, desk job, moderately successful. Physical labor is cathartic. You are right that I don't do enough of it. ​ My point about asking wasn't so much to elicit enough detail to convince an internet stranger, but to…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/04/22 09:58 PM
1

Right now my primary focus has to be to lose fat. I don't know if it's better to cut all the way down to 160-170 then gain muscle from there or cut to 190-200 and do a body recomp. The initial weight loss is going to take 6-12 months. In the meantime, I'm lifting to preserve as much muscle as I can on the way down.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/04/22 06:31 PM
1

What the fuck man? There are no excuses. Do you want to be a fat, unattractive cunt? I agree there are no excuses, which is why I didn't offer any. I've started a new routine and re-committed myself this week. ​ You don't say in you OYS what your goals are and how you are going to achieve them. Let me guess, you don't know? Just because I didn't state goals doesn't mean I don't have any. The goal I just hit was to lose 10% of my body weight (252 lbs.). My previous goal was to hit what I weighed …
/r/MarriedRedPill15/04/22 05:11 PM
1

> Somewhere along the lines I decided there were only 3 criteria for being a "good man" The opposite of crazy is still crazy. Same with this. I didn't convey my thoughts well here. I was trying to make the point that I have believed for a long time that those three criteria were all that were needed to attract a quality woman. It didn't matter how fat, lazy, in debt, or slovenly you were. Clearly that's not the case. ​ > who dated and married a string of shitbags (aside from my father) That soun…
/r/MarriedRedPill15/04/22 04:59 PM
1

I've watched a lot of Rian's stuff. I started watching the NMMNG series, but couldn't get into it. I ultimately decided it was because I had read the book too long ago. I'm currently watching the WISNIFG series and reading the book concurrently. I' really enjoying it.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/04/22 07:05 PM
5

OYS #2 Age: 49 Married: 18 Years Children: 2 sons Ht/Wt: 5'9", 252 (from 280) BF%: Fat as fuck. Lifts: BP 105 (x8), SQ 135 (x8), DL 185 (x5) Read: NMMNG (X2), MMSLP (X2), MAP, WOTSM, SGM Reading: WISNIFG Mission: Stop being a bystander in my own life, and live life as I see fit. Health / Attractiveness: My diet continues to go well. I'm 7 weeks in, and I haven't had too many problems with hunger or cravings. When I've tried to lose weight in the in the past, this is when things start to get chal…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/04/22 03:18 PM
2

Ditch Mint and sign up for YNAB (youneedabudget.com) instead. I tracked every penny I spent in Quicken for almost 20 years. It always told me where my money went, but didn't do anything to help me direct it or change course. Mint is similar (in fact Mint is owned by the same company). YNAB is more of a system with software built around it. In 8 months of using YNAB, I've paid off almost $25K in debt, making quite a bit less than you do. A couple of warnings: 1) The learning curve is steep. There…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/04/22 06:59 PM
1

Sounds to me like you don’t really trust yourself or have a good foundation of self approval/ validation. You need her to overtly approve of your decisions. Even just dropping it isn’t enough, that’s why you had to prod for a bit more proof that she approves. This is absolutely true. Not just with her, but with everybody. I have to largely stay off of social media because anytime I post, I go back obsessively looking for validation.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/04/22 06:20 PM
1

Time to get to work. Will do.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/04/22 06:11 PM
1

OYS #1 Age: 48 Married: 17 Years Children: 2 sons (31 & 16) Weight: 254 (from 280) BF%: Fat as fuck. Lifts: BP 105 (x8), SQ 135 (x8), DL 185 (x5) Read: NMMNG (X2), MMSLP (X2), MAP, WOTSM, SGM Reading: WISNIFG Background: In 2010, after a particularly nasty fight with my wife I googled dead bedrooms, and ultimately found NMMNG. I ordered the book and joined the NMMNG forum. Since then, I've never really committed to change, and I've spent the last 12 years half-assing trying to improve myself. I'…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/04/22 03:08 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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