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OilJust4498 Archive

View 0 posts and 236 comments by OilJust4498 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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–

>It's not misogynist >criticise a woman
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/24 02:28 AM
–

I do both, IRL is important but there's no reason you can't supplement your IRL work with OLD.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/24 02:27 AM
–

The most important thing to remember is patience. I am a 37 a year old virgin whose been trying to get a date for the past 20 years now and in just the past 5 years I've made tremendous progress on this. Through my self improving and now working OLD apps I've made serious strides towards getting a gf and it seems I may soon be seeing the fruits of my labor. In just the past couple years I've had two women agree to go out with me via OLD (though these ultimately fell through). So, yes, it may be …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/24 01:40 AM
2

Thank you for the positivity, it feels like in the past 5 years I've made more progress and am closing in on success than I had in my first 16 years of trying to get a date (I'm 37). I think if I keep working it I could land a date, and maybe even a girl/get laid by the time I'm 40.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/24 01:35 AM
1

This might be a stupid thing to say but try multiple dating apps Yes but the important thing to remember with the apps is patience I started using OLD 5 years ago and, via swiping right 100 times a day, I've managed to get a few dozen matches and even got 2 women to agree to go out with me back in 2022 (though both backed out unfortunately), this is success I wouldn't have had if I wasn't willing to work at it. Had I given up after the first few weeks I would have had 0 matches and 0 conversatio…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/24 01:30 AM
1

Everyone I know has had an "all men/women are awful" moment breakups suck I can't relate.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/24 01:27 AM
–

I understand why some might be averse but my point is that, like anything good in life, it takes hard work and dedication. To be honest I'm not the most attractive man and I was able to get a yes in only 3 years, if you're an average guy, and you're willing to work it you could easily get a yes within a year (maybe a little longer if you swipe left some). When I finally get a date it's going to feel good after all my hard work pays off.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/24 12:39 AM
–

>I'm sorry this has been your experience. You misunderstand, I don't mean this as a negative. What I am trying to say is that you have to work it. If I had just given up after a few weeks I would be at 0 matches 0 conversations, as it is now I've had two women agree to go out with me and I'm pretty darn close to my first date. So It just takes time and patience.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 11:46 PM
–

Honestly from my experience the best way to get results from the apps is patience and hard work. I started using OLD 5 years ago and, via swiping right 100 times a day, I've managed to get a few dozen matches and even got 2 women to agree to go out with me back in 2022 (though both backed out unfortunately), this is success I wouldn't have had if I wasn't willing to work at it. Had I given up after the first few weeks I would have had 0 matches and 0 conversations. If I stay with it a few years …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 11:25 PM
–

>No it isn't misogynistic. It comes from the idea a woman is less valuable for being sexually promiscuous, I would see such a notion as steeped in misogyny as it values a women's worth around her sexual history.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 11:22 PM
1

man to get validationman to get validation Do good deeds So what do you recommend a man try to get validation online ? Who cares about online validation.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 11:18 PM
–

>I reject men who are teachers, is that misandry? No you the two are unrelated.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 09:33 PM
–

I would be with a stripper, honestly I think denying a women simply because of her profession is stepped in misogynist. What she does for a living has nothing to do with what she'd be like as a girlfriend and as long as shes willing to date me I'd be willing to date her.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 08:10 PM
–

While I wouldn't be happy about it if a woman wanted me to sacrifice my friends, interests, hobbies, their individuality for a relationship I would. Beggars can't be choosers after all.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 07:46 PM
–

What I meant was I know you didn't mean to be misogynistic when you asked the question (since your flair says woman) however it is misogynistic to view one type of woman as more desirable than another, both are good and valid.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 07:44 PM
2

I was researching new methods I could try to get a girlfriend and I discovered womens prisons/pen pal systems. Has anybody tried this method yet? I'm a 37 year old virgin so I'm really up for anything. You do have to wait for them to be released but at least I could try to plant the seeds of a future relationship along with my use of OLD, cold and warm approaching.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 06:32 PM
4

jacked off to portraiture busts
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 05:55 PM
–

No offense but this wanting women to be a certain way seems like misogyny, a woman can be or act however she wants and still be 'valued' and 'feminine' to borrow your terms.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 05:50 PM
2

Self improvement is very important but I think it's only half the battle. You should be constantly working to improve yourself whilst also lowering your standards. It would be foolish for me to pass up a woman who would be willing to date me simply because she didn't meet some arbitrary checklist. So I say improve yourself, gym, career, social skills and the like while also lowering your standards, do both and you will increase your chances of success. In the past two years I've had two women of…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 05:42 PM
–

>"Dating Classes" in school I think I've heard of this before
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 03:06 PM
1

Why, what do you think you're going to get? If I keep at it a few more years probably a date, if I'm even more persistent and willing to work it perhaps I will even get a girlfriend or lose my virginity. It may take 10 more days it may take 10 more years, I just have to be persistent.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 04:21 AM
1

Lowering standards is important, I have been lowering my standards for about 15 of the past 20 years I've been trying to date and it's finally starting to yield me some success. I believe if I keep working it I will soon land a date. So yes, don't just reject someone because they don't meet an arbitrary checklist, after all beggars can't be choosers.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 04:17 AM
1

Whatever she wants, a woman can be anything she sets her mind to, married or otherwise. If she wants to be a Doctor that's fine or if she wants to sit in bed all day and do literally nothing except eat and sleep that's fine too. My goal would be to make her happy and to support her.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 04:04 AM
1

If we're in a relationship theres presumably a desire to make the other person happy. Her not cheating on me would make me happy so presumably if I explain this to her she will stop. If not I would try to get to the route of the matter to find out perhaps if theres something she's missing with me and try to fix it so she no longer feels the need to cheat. If not than perhaps I could offer her financial compensation to convince her to stop like €200 a week or something. After a few months of this…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 03:18 AM
1

will they stay with their partner if they start sleeping around? Speaking personally as a 37 year old virgin, while I wouldn't be happy about it if I ever got a gf and she cheated I probably wouldn't leave her for it (why quit after finally getting into a relationship over something non physical) Instead I would voice my displeasure of her actions and encourage her to change or find ways to better myself to discourage her from cheating. I would however leave if she was abusive towards children, …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 03:05 AM
1

Honestly I think we just got so used to being puppets of authoritarian regimes for so long that we don't know how to be democratic. We were puppets of the Communists, than the Nazis, than the Communists again. After seventy years of authoritarian rule it's become hard for the older generation to adjust to the idea of non-corrupt, non-riged elections
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 02:47 AM
–

No offense but it sounds like you're spending too much time on social media. I've never heard of any of the stuff you've mentioned in your post and I'm not even sure what a Bachelor Joker is. Perhaps the types of people who've heard of this stuff (which I'm guessing are young or chronically online) are more likely to give you a vitriolic reaction than the average man.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 01:28 AM
2

Watching the way random Americans on this subreddit talks about politics has convinced me that being from Eastern Europe isn't so bad after all.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 01:16 AM
–

>Before I (19, male) >19 Opinion disregarded.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/24 12:22 AM
–

I would be happy with either though I guess I'd prefer the former since I wouldn't like it if on the off chance the later ended up cheating on with the men she liked (I don't like cheating in relationships). If she did I would not be happy and would let her know she hurt me and ask her to stop cheating. But again as a 37 year old virgin whose never been in a relationship I would be happy with either, either one would be a step above the none I have now.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 11:52 PM
3

Me, who is 161 cm (5'3"): "uhh... well this is awkward"
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 11:01 PM
1

Exactly my point, all that stuff is just superficial. As long as she is A) Of Age B) single and C) a woman who is willing to date me I would be more than willing to date her. I couldn't care about what she looks like or anything like that, her being interested in me makes her attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 10:14 PM
1

That's fine, you're welcome to have your own preferences, I was just saying from me personally I would never turn down any woman willing to go on a date with me simply because- as a beggar, I'm in no position to be a chooser and if she can overlook my flaws I would be more than happy to overlook any of hers and give her the same chance shes giving me.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 09:26 PM
2

I've been single with friends for 37 years, now I would like try having a girlfriend. The idea of me turning a woman down because they have a limp, or a mole, or don't meet some height/weight measurement I prefer just seems somewhat misogynistic to me, like your only valuing a woman's appearance. As long as she is willing to date me I would happily date her, beggars can't be choosers after all.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 08:14 PM
1

No, I am looking for a girlfriend. However I recognize beggars can't be choosers. While a man is welcome to turn down anybody for any arbitrary reasons he'd like he doesn't have the right to complain when he finds yourself single.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 07:42 PM
1

My goal is to get a girlfriend, as such things like 'Physical Attraction' are completely irrelevant. If you're willing to be with me that's good enough for me. Besides what they look like has nothing to do with what they're like as a person.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 07:28 PM
0

>Do you have a type? If yes, what is it? I do not. Appearance is just superficial. It says nothing about what the person is like underneath. Speaking as a 37 never old whose never been on a date before I would be willing to be anyone who would be willing to be with me. The fact they're willing to date me would make a woman attractive, not any of that superficial appearance nonsense.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 07:08 PM
1

I agree with you cheating is bad.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 06:57 PM
1

>No, a lack of sex isn't an excuse for cheating. Nothing is an excuse for cheating really, I agree one should never cheat, if my partner ever cheat I would definitely be hurt and would be telling her as much/asking her not to do it again.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 06:48 PM
1

>Cheaters suck. You communicate with your partner. I agree if my partner cheated on me I would be upset, I would tell her as much and you can believe I would be working very hard to convince her not to do it again.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 06:44 PM
1

>I encourage men to cheat instead of communicating about sex and putting undue pressure on their wives. So don't accuse me of that. I disagree I think cheating is horrible and I would never do it, if my partner cheated on me (this is hypothetical I've never been in a relationship) I would be upset and would tell her as much as tell her I would like for her not to do it again. If she kept cheating on me I would be very hurt and would work to convince her not to.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 06:42 PM
1

I understand and of course nobody should be forced to be in a relationship they don't want to be. I'm just saying for me personally the many valuable benefits and relationship experience I get from being in a relationship, abusive or otherwise, outweigh any of the negative. If nothing else even if the relationship fails to improve and I have to end it I would still have something I could point to in order to clear the virgin red flag, "Incel? No I was with her before". Which means that while the…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 05:28 PM
1

Even if it's a fake experience though it is still some practice, he knows how a woman might respond to certain prompts and can adjust accordingly all without having to engage in prostitution, the later would harm his chances given how high of a red flag it might be. I don't think OF should completely usurp talking to women IRL (I mean the goal is to get a real life girlfriend after all, but it can certainly supplement it for extra practice time).
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 05:25 PM
5

Thank you for the positivity, we need more of that on this sub. The good thing is the feeling of success when I finally get a girlfriend after 20 years of hard work will be something
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 05:22 PM
1

Well I guess it's sort of subjective, I'm just speaking from my own POV, having been in the search for a date for a little over 20 years from the outside once I finally get into a relationship I would try to rectify it before just quitting outright. While I wouldn't stick around if it was some serious life threatening stuff (because no relationship is worth your life) if I'm unable to fix the relationship I would at least get the social proofs from being in a relationship (being able to clear th…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 05:19 PM
5

I wouldn't say a success story per say but it's definitely more than I had prior and a step in the right direction.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 05:16 PM
5

One thing I do find strange about American politics is the 'electoral college'. No ones ever been able to properly explain it to me but from my understanding basically when your vote it's really just more of a suggestion but this shadowy force called the electoral college makes the final decision. I don't know they have to make Democracy so complex some times.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 04:42 PM
-2

For me personally, as a 37 year old virgin whose never been in a relationship, I couldn't fathom ever voluntarily ending a relationship for anything short of suffering life threatening levels of abuse (no girlfriend is worth your life), I mean after 20 years of trying to get into a relationship I wouldn't want to finally end the first one I got into without trying to make it better. But everyone is different and depending on your personal situation and what you want out of life, than of course y…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 04:29 PM
4

Thank you, we need more positivity on the sub, too many people are quick to anger and get very hot under the collar. I've seen a lot of people unfortunately direct their anger towards you lately so, on behalf of the people on the sub trying to foster a politer sub, I wanted to offer some words of encouragement not to quit and to keep going.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 04:24 PM
1

I agree with you about the advantages of only fans, through OF one can have contact with tons of women in a provocative setting, which helps with getting the experience and confidence needed to do the same IRL without having to visit a prostitute, the later of which might actually hurt a man's quest to get a date since some women would view seeing a prostitute as a red flag.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 04:21 PM
6

>A person that doesn’t believe of self improvement cant comprehend people who actually want to find themselves. Self improvement is very important but I think it's only half the battle. You should be constantly working to improve yourself whilst also lowering your standards. It would be foolish for me to pass up a woman who would be willing to date me simply because she didn't meet some arbitrary checklist. So I say improve yourself, gym, career, social skills and the like while also lowering yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 04:15 PM
8

As an Eastern European I find the intensity of American's political views very interesting. In this part of the world, where half of the countries are listed as by the UN as 'flawed democracies', it's like "Election? Who cares they're all corrupt anyways". As a 37 year old virgin if I finally got with a woman and she happened to be very passionate about her party I'd probably just switch my vote for her. I mean really who cares, they're just different shades of corrupt here.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 04:11 PM
3

I have enjoyed utilizing this subreddit. Unfortunately I must return to work on Sunday after a few weeks off and my ability to utilize this sub should decrees after that. I have learned a lot here I hope to utilize in my quest to get a date.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 03:40 AM
1

Have you also seen the backlash when men discover their wives may vote for a different candidate? I'm an Eastern European, your political system always seems very strange to me, here, where like half the countries are listed by the UN as 'flawed democracies' it's like, "Election? Who cares they're all corrupt anyways" It's odd how passionate Americans are about team blue vs team red. Regardless for me personally, as a 37 year old virgin whose been trying to get a date for more than 20 years, I c…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 03:27 AM
7

Do not let this perturb you, if anything it should give you hope. I admit I'm on the lesser attractive side and I've managed to get like 15 conversations (as in she responded more than once) since I started in 2019. That's one every 4 months, and 2 yes's. You're young and if you're a decent enough guy, and just swipe right you could easily get a woman to agree to a date within the first year or two, a bit longer if you swipe left on some women. The thing to remember is just to do your swipes eac…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 02:34 AM
1

Appreciate the offer (and kind words) but unfortunately I'm from the Baltics in Eastern Europe, though I've been through O'hare before.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 01:33 AM
7

lol I'm saying the opposite, I'm saying I'm really close right now to a date, if I fail for another 13 years, and the tech rapidly advanced, than maybe I'd consider an alternative. Until then it's human or nothing.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 12:33 AM
11

As I said I've made significant progress towards getting a date over the past five years and I feel like I'm really within striking range. I starting using OLD 5 years ago and, via swiping right 100 times a day, I've managed to get a few dozen matches and even got 2 women to agree to go out with me back in 2022 (though both backed out unfortunately) I wouldn't want to give up before 40 (I'm 37 now) or probably not even before 50. If I got to 50 still without a GF than I might consider alternativ…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 12:26 AM
1

I have to go back to work on Sunday after some time off.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 12:23 AM
23

I don't know how effective they are or will be. For me personally I am a 37 year old virgin, I would like, and will keep trying, to get a date with a real woman, and I've made real progress in recent years towards getting a date, so I do think I'll have a real breakthrough within the next few years. But if I don't by the time I'm 50, and the technology has progressed enough then sure, I'd definitely check it out.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/24 12:03 AM
1

A lot of women might be intimidated if you approach them in a 1 on 1 setting which is important for men, such as myself to remember. In the past when cold approaching women I always try to do my best to make myself as non threatening as possible to lower any potential fear she has to increase the likelihood of a positive response (offer a weak handshake, be in a crowded place, that sort of stuff). I've yet to succeed in getting a date cold approaching but I've been rejected nicer this way than b…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/24 11:45 PM
3

>I would be creeped out if a guy approached me on my own This is important for men, such as myself to remember. In the past when cold approaching women I always try to do my best to make myself as non threatening as possible to lower any potential fear she has to increase the likelihood of a positive response (offer a weak handshake, be in a crowded place, that sort of stuff). I've yet to succeed in getting a date cold approaching but I've been rejected nicer this way than before I took this stu…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/24 11:43 PM
1

Every now and then I breath into a mirror and check for condensation to verify I'm alive.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/24 11:14 PM
0

>Someone who does nice things for people without expecting anything in return except respect. I disagree you shouldn't do nice things for people and expect respect in return. You should just do nice things with or without respect being given,
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/24 10:38 PM
1

why not date a fat girl instead of a fit one because the fit one wont go with you to mc donalds or cook you fatty pizza at home Fat= more of her to love. I'm tired of of this anti chubby women propaganda being spewed.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/24 10:37 PM
4

>Good guy = a guy who isn't trying to game, lie, or rizz his way into my pants. This is very important. It's necessary to tell the truth, even when it's inconvenient. I believe, even when it hurts you, you should be completely honesty because if you lie and that lie is revealed it will do more harm than good. For example I am a 37 year old virgin and I'd never shy away from admitting it to anyone, because if I lie and the lie is revealed I've deceived somebody into a relationship and that's bad.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/24 10:34 PM
1

This is true, self improvement is very important. However I think it's just half the battle. You should be constantly working to improve yourself whilst also lowering your standards. It would be foolish for me to pass up a woman who would be willing to date me simply because she didn't meet some arbitrary checklist. So I say improve yourself, gym, career, social skills and the like while also lowering your standards, do both and you will increase your chances of success. In the past two years I'…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/24 10:31 PM
5

It seems I'm becoming known in the community, perhaps a bit polarizing. The black pill people like me for being a 5'3 37 year old virgin, the blue pill people like me for refusing to quit despite the little success I've had. And at the same time the black people pill dislike me for refusing to quit and the blue pill people think I'm bad for my lack of success. Nobody really knows what to make of me.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/24 10:04 PM
7

>You meet the perfect woman You can stop right there. I would take almost any women. The perfect woman? Thank who cares about her ex, that shit is in the past, Hell it could be in the present and while I wouldn't like it I'd probably tolerate it, especially if she was the perfect.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/24 10:02 PM
10

>Do you get that a lot? Only here
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/24 10:46 AM
3

>So whats stopping you dedicating a quarter of your week trying to date? should I be embarrassed to tell you I already do? It depends on how you count self improvement time (daily exercise for example) as trying to get a date. If you count self improve time than it's probably 50% of my non working non asleep hours. >Something seems off, but also feels like you haven’t been trying hard enough. I do wonder if seem the advent on my use of Online dating 5 years ago I've taken my foot off the Gas rec…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/24 04:26 AM
1

Hard to say for certain but I'm working on it. I did go on a date 11 years ago but that was more of a friend thing with someone I knew than a proper 'date-date'. Like I said in my previous post though I think it's going to turn around for me in the next few years, I already got 2 women to agree to go out with me in 2022 via tinder (though they backed out beforehand) so you can see progress is definitely being made.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/24 02:59 AM
1

I guess you could say that. I've never been on a real date before, I did go on like a somewhat friend date 11 years ago but that was more of a friend thing than a proper 'Date-Date'. Since I started using tinder 5 years ago I did manage to get 2 women to agree to go out with me back in 2022 (though both ultimatley backed out) and honestly I feel like if I keep using it for a few more years I may finally be sucessfully as I've gotten over a dozen matches since I started in 2019.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/24 01:39 AM
11

If I had the answers I wouldn't have been trying for over 20 years. I think it's going to happen soon though, I've been using OLD for 5 years now and, by swiping right a hundred times a day, I've managed to get a few dozen matches and even got a couple women to agree to go on a date with me 2 years ago (though both backed out) I think if I keep working it for a few more years I shall land a date.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/24 01:37 AM
1

161 cm (5'3) here, I'd have to crank my neck up to see both of you.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/24 01:28 AM
10

I suppose that's true if you divorce, though in a relationship you have the advantage of pulling together 2 peoples incomes at once, which should help.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/24 01:14 AM
1

I'm sorry to hear about that. I admit I'm guilty of cold approaching, I used to do it a lot more when I was younger though now that I've gotten older (I'm 37) and with recent world events (covid) I've begun transitioning towards other methods like OLD and warm approaching, though I'll still approach women like 4 times a year, however now realizing how upsetting it can be for some women I think I'll put a final stop to it. Besides I've had more success in OLD. I've been using tinder for 5 years a…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/24 01:13 AM
14

I try to exercise regularly that should hopefully help with my long term health.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/24 01:01 AM
25

I am a 5'3 guy, I don't know about being THE 5'3" guy
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/24 12:59 AM
2

https://preview.redd.it/890mw3k6o6yd1.png?width=960&format=png&auto=webp&s=981a62ec97cc405b404567f2c4e480e8be359425
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/24 12:19 AM
61

I am a 37 year old virgin whose been trying to get a date for over 20 years now. If sex was a need I would have died ages ago.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/24 12:18 AM
1

what did you lose?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 11:37 PM
2

Excuses to not have self improvement. This is very important to do, but it's half the battle. You should be constantly working to improve yourself whilst also lowering your standards. It would be foolish for me to pass up a woman who would be willing to date me simply because she didn't meet some arbitrary checklist. So I say improve yourself, gym, career, social skills and the like while also lowering your standards, do both and you will increase your chances of success. In the past two years I…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 11:35 PM
3

unpopular opinion from a man but I believe, even when it hurts you, you should be completely honesty because if you lie and that lie is revealed it will do more harm than good. For example I am a 37 year old virgin and I'd never shy away from admitting it to anyone, because if I lie and the lie is revealed I've deceived somebody into a relationship and that's bad.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 10:41 PM
1

I don't think it's the same as rape or sexual assault, but it's really shitty nevertheless I agree with this, I believe, even when it hurts you you should be completely honesty because if you lie and that lie is revealed it will do more harm than good. For example I am a 37 year old virgin and I'd never shy away from admitting it to anyone, because if I lie and the lie is revealed I've deceived somebody into a relationship and that's bad.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 10:40 PM
2

to a 22 year old virgin Me, a 37 year old virgin: "22? Those are rookie numbers you gotta pump those numbers up!"
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 10:37 PM
1

How can one demand women to approach? get an Attraction sign a la Chris Chan
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 07:36 PM
1

A friendly chat, theres not really too much room on Tinder to get creative I would see if you can get an action shot of you actually building one. That'd be more interesting I think Ok I'll add a picture and let it run for a few months and see what happens.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 05:28 PM
1

Do you mean what photos? Generally they are of myself in various locations and situations, I've asked friends about photos and have gotten their help in choosing them. If you mean written stuff than just a short description of me, what I do and what I'm looking for. I don't think it would help (because it's very niche and is largely done by men) but if you really want me to I can put photos of these models ships in my profile just to see what happens
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 05:10 PM
2

Yeah but he isn't wrong about big women though
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 04:49 PM
1

No.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 04:42 PM
1

The first option seems the most appealing. I already knew my parents but only grew to 161 cm (5'3) in the first scenario I can keep my parents and add 5 inches.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 04:42 PM
2

>Don't let a woman be fat Relevant: https://tenor.com/view/what-can-skinny-women-do-gif-19510615
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 04:39 PM
2

With online dating it's important to remember to put the work in for success. I got tinder 5 years ago and, through swiping right 100 times a day I managed to get a few dozen matches and even got 2 women to agree to go out with me, those these dates ultimately never happened. The point is I would not have been able to have this level of success being willing to put in the work. It's not hard you just have to remember to do your swipes every day and update your photo every few years.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 04:30 PM
1

Model ship building is pretty cool too! Have you ever shown people your work? Yes, I've shown my friend and people who've been over to my place.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 04:26 PM
1

I don't know I think I may have success here in the Baltics soon. I recently started using Online Dating about 5 years ago and with a grand strategy of swiping right 100 times I day I've managed to get a few dozen matches and even got two women to agree to go out with me a couple years ago (though these dates never materialized) so I think if I keep with it I may have some success within the next few years. >You will also be seen as taller probably Me, who is 161 cm (5'3"): "eh, I don't know abo…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 04:24 PM
2

"Give me 1,000 dollars"- t. Furio Giunta "....1,000 more?"- Plato
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 04:08 PM
1

I'm for eastern europe, we're about 20 years behind the curve on everything
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 07:17 AM
5

Keep in mind I am a 37 year old virgin so I guess my perception on what is acceptable may be warped a bit. Of course I am just speaking for myself when I say I would date any woman willing to date me, so long as she is not currently in a relation (I don't like cheating), you're situation may enable you to be a bit stricter. While I personally would I don't think anybody should be forced to date someone they don't like physically or otherwise.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 07:07 AM
5

Respectfully I disagree, I guess maybe you could extrapolate if someone is very overweight they don't work out or take car of themselves but beyond that appearances are just superficial. For example good people can be really tall or really short, they can be so skinny or fat, black or white. Same is true for bad people. I am a 37 year old virgin, if I was to start turning people away because of how they looked the few opportunities I have with women would quickly diminish. But again, I'm just sp…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 07:03 AM
1

While I'd never turn down anyone for their appearances alone I do agree with you that in extreme being overweight could be a turn off (like if you're 400+ pounds) but I think a few curves in the right places are really attractive. I see the way some of these models makes themselves so skinny and it's like, "What can she not afford food?" So there can also be extreme in the opposite direction of being so skinny it's unappealing.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 06:49 AM
6

Well I guess it's a matter of how you look at it. I've never had a girlfriend before so somebody being willing to go out with me would certainly be intriguing, like who is she, I want to know more about her, that kind of stuff. Things like height, weight, pretty/ugly, who cares about that nonsense. It's all superficial, it says nothing about how she is underneath. I try not to judge the book by its cover
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 06:46 AM
4

Well I guess everyones different about that/has a different situation. As I said at the top of my post I'm only speaking for myself. I will say though while you're welcome to turn down whoever you want if you're turning away good women for some dumb superficial reasons like how she looks (which has nothing to do with what shes like) than you have no right to complain when you find yourself single.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 06:43 AM
10

From browsing this subreddit I have gotten the opinion that a lot of people think men don't like larger women. Speaking for myself personally I quite like larger women. To quote the famed philosopher, t. Furio Giunta: "I like a woman you can grab onto something". Though really all that stuff like skinny vs fat, tall vs short, pretty vs ugly, is just superficial. It says nothing about what the person is like underneath. I would be willing to be anyone who would be willing to be with me. The fact …
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 05:30 AM
3

lol I feel called out.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 05:25 AM
1

What sort of skills/hobbies do you have that you actually enjoy doing? Which one do you think you'd say you have a strong passion for? Which do you think you could talk about with some degree of excitement? I really don't want to give away too much personal info but I enjoy exercising, I enjoy it as much as I enjoy the health benefits of it (I always feel good after I'm done) I enjoy music, I like to travel in fact my job involves traveling extensively and as an extension I like to learn languag…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 12:10 AM
1

Thank you for your kind words, I know you're looking out for my best interests when you say that. The good news is most women are good so it's unlikely that, if I ever got into a relationship, it would be abusive, and if it was and I found out I really hated it I could always just leave.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 12:01 AM
1

Well, I guess it's all a matter of preferences. For me personally I would be accepting of such a relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/24 11:34 PM
2

if you don't struggle with dating I've never been on a date
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/24 10:52 PM
2

https://preview.redd.it/le8t7u273zxd1.png?width=960&format=png&auto=webp&s=3953430c53dac2ca0623d7f2e4041a48307a653e
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/24 10:49 PM
2

maybe he's just 5'3 Me, who is 161 cm (5'3"): "I feel attacked"
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/24 10:47 PM
1

I feel that, especially when you get sick for like a week or two and once you come back you find you lost significant progress and can't run or lift as far/much as you used to.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/24 10:43 PM
1

That's still an abusive relationship. She's making you pay for decent treatment That was just an example, if I can turn the negative relationship into a positive I don't see why I wouldn't. If I get a girlfriend who is a decent person and it only costs me say €50 a month why would I?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/24 10:40 PM
1

Where are you from/do you still live there? For privacy reasons I don't want say exactly which one but I'll give you a hint on the region- when I was born in the 80s my country had "Soviet Socialist Republic" in the name. Objectively, terrible terrible advice. Do not lower your standards. You deserve better. Thank you for the kind words, even if I don't agree with what your saying I do appreciate the positive sentiment. Of those skills, which ones do you desire? Well it's a lot of life skills wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/24 10:39 PM
1

They aren't there with a woman who doesn't respect you Even if theres no benefit I could still find enjoyment in acting like a good boyfriend should, treating her tenderly and with respect, that could be fun. but by you choosing an abusive relationship Well I guess I'd hope less woman would be put off by my being with an abusive woman than by me being a virgin at 37. One person cannot fix a relationship alone I would try to make her a better person by acting good and loving, perhaps if that fail…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/24 07:27 PM
1

I'm asking if you ever asked followup questions, like if she shared a hobby and you responded inquisitively asking about how long she's done it, or maybe found some common interest in it. I'm asking if you remember any aspects about the women who you've conversed with. It's a bit telling that you don't seem to remember the conversations, but I want to get a gauge on exactly how they are, to see if maybe there are things you can improve on or at least determine an underlying cause. I'm sorry I di…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/24 07:27 PM
6

>How tall are you? 161 cm (5'3") >How much can you bench? No idea, I mostly just do free weights (arm curl type stuff) >How much money do you make? In American dollars like 60,000 I think (€55,000 in my own country), I'm from the Baltics so a buck can take you a lot further here (things are cheaper)
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/24 06:00 PM
0

>Why the fuck are you not seeking women who have passions and hobbies? Speaking as a 37 year old whose never been in a relationship I think one must cast a wide net if they want to catch anything and from my vantage point what someone does or doesn't do in their free time isn't really something I can afford to be picky on.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/24 05:20 PM
2

>•he drove a cargo van lol in my country (I'm from the Baltics) he'd been pretty normal. I swear everybody drives those stupid sprinter vans.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/24 05:12 PM
12

>most people date when they’re young dumb and reckless. Me, a 37 year old whose never been on a date: "Now they tell me".
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/24 05:09 PM
1

It might sound silly, but I want you to really dig deep for the answer here. Are these conversations very general, or are they playful? Is there flirting? Is there any lol or jokes formed? Or is it just "what do you do on the weekends?" "I go hiking" "that's cool" Could you be a bit more specific? I guess both, it's hard for me to really say how the conversations went, it would depend on the woman. Okay but...you're still lacking a relationship. Is it not worth trying a different mindset? That's…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/24 05:07 PM
1

Okay that's kind of what I'm asking. What "other stuff" could possibly come from a relationship with someone who doesn't respect you? We could spend time together, psychological reasons, it's hard to describe the benefits on a relationship since I've never been in a relationship before, but I know they're there. Social proof also doesn't bring as much clout as you think, especially if it's so obviously abusive. There are a lot of people in my age range who would be adverse to being with a virgin…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/24 05:03 PM
1

>As a woman, a man living his life solely to be attractive to women in unattractive lol. lol why do I feel called out
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/24 04:39 PM
1

sounds really neat, one thing I feel like I would be worried about is bumping heads together (after all your only centimeters apart) do you have to be careful when your making out not to move forward?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/24 04:49 AM
2

curiosity
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/24 04:48 AM
2

Congratulations, it sounds like you're having a good time. If you don't mind me asking, what is it like to kiss a woman romantically? I never have so I'm always really curious about the experience, for some reason I feel like it'd be all wet and slimy (cause lips= saliva)
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/24 03:53 AM
4

Just friendship in general. It may be different for women (I wouldn't know I'm not a woman). >I am 21 so I haven’t experienced this to that extent yet. I don't mean to sound doom and gloom, if you and your friends are willing to put in the work you can definitely find time to hang out together, it just takes a bit more planning (and patience) than when you are in school. For me at least I generally have to call a few days ahead of time to confer on schedules before planning anything with anymore…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/24 03:21 AM
6

Friends are nice, the only trouble is maintaining friendships when you get to be over 30 (I'm 37) is difficult as everyone's free time becomes more scarce, it's hard to find time to get together and getting together with more than one friend at once? It's basically a pipe dream.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/24 03:14 AM
3

I don’t see a woman being in her mid 30s as a negative I agree I am 37 and if I didn't try asking out women over 30 it would be very weird...
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/24 02:50 AM
3

England, Canada, and Spain 3rd world Me, whose from Eastern Europe, "Well... this is awkward".
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/24 09:50 PM
3

If it works for you and your spouse that's good, I was just speaking for myself personally. I've never been in a relationship before so I'm kind of speaking in hypotheticals but for me personally I would like both to be working, but of course if she wanted to not work or needed to be a stay at home mom than I would do that as well, it would just depend on what she wanted.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/24 08:47 PM
1

Do you talk about hobbies? Share a joke? Or is it just "how are you, how was your day, let's meet up on thursday Yes, I make general conversation about hobbies and the like when appropriate before trying to get the date. By raising your standards, you are forced to actually think about the kind of relationship you want, and subsequently work towards it. Casting a net so wide so that it includes anyone and everyone allows you to be stagnant, to wait around until something else happens. By realizi…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/24 07:11 PM
1

What value do you get from that though? Theres not much value in that particular aspect of the relationship, it's more stuff you'd endure to get to the other stuff. Not to mention the social proof you will get from having had a girlfriend, which will help me in future relationship pursuits. Perhaps this is an issue where we have to agree to disagree? The common advice people give about relationships is to leave them if you have to ifght hard for your partner's affection. This would be that kind …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/24 07:06 PM
1

I've heard this sentiment before but I'm not sure I agree (though I appreciate your positive words) I think if one is struggling to get into a relationship they would be unwise not to lower their standards whilst trying to self improve, one must give themselves as many opportunities as possible. Besides is a single mother really settling? It's all superficial anyways, doesn't mean much about how she is underneath
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/24 05:47 PM
9

>With wider social circle you get more opportunities to be flirty as well. That's true you have to cast a wide net if you want to catch anything. More people in your circle I think means more opportunities
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/24 05:02 PM
1

>Men say they can still love their wives and cheat. Big nope. Speaking personally, as a 37 year old virgin whose never been in a relationship, I would never cheat and while I wouldn't be happy with my hypothetical partner for cheating on me I would still be willing to be with her. After all if she's willing to be in a relationship with me (which has yet to happen) than she's got to be worth fighting for right? Instead of just tossing her aside like a piece of trash I would try to work through he…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/24 04:22 PM
2

As a 37 year old virgin I would be very happy to get into a relationship, single mom or not. The fact she's willing to be with me makes her instantly attractive to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/24 04:14 PM
1

Being a girlfriend isn't showing respect I know the OP kind of implied she didn't respect or value me. But that doesn't mean I wouldn't value her or our time together even if she was being mean and slapping, verbally berating, or cheating on me. Besides it's possible that by being nice and providing her with a loving environment I might convince her to change her ways, or at least lessen the abuse.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/24 04:12 PM
1

This is...very little. For me it's a real uptick a real uptick from when I started 2003 to 2021, it's a sign I may get a date soon (within a few more years) if I keep employing OLD with my irl stuff. I still try in real life too, I used to cold approach though that has largely fizzled out over the past several years (now I probably cold approach less than 4 times a year) and warm approach whenever I can. Okay cool. So with about a dozen matches, what sort of conversations were you having? Maybe …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/24 04:09 PM
1

Hmmm I'm still confused. I understand that you see the same benefits of relationships whether they are abusive or no That may be my English second language at work, I'm not saying they have the same level of benefit, just that they both have some benefits. A non-abusive relationship has more but they both, I think, have some. Do you want those so much you would suffer abuse to make them happen? Not to any extremes, no, but I think I'd put up with some of the more minor stuff (slapping, verbal ab…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/24 04:00 PM
3

American politics seems so wild, you can tell someones an American by how devoted they are to their political ideology, I'm from Eastern Europe and here it's like 'election? who cares they're all corrupt anyways'.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/24 02:41 AM
1

Thank you for your perspective, before I say anything I should probably clarify that I'm just speaking for me personally and what I personally would be alright with. I think that abuse, generally is a horrible thing, and that you should never, and I do mean never, put your hands on a woman. If you have been through, or somebody you know has, than I'm sorry. I guess I should probably clarify that I would only be OK with some minor things, I do agree with you that emotional abuse is really scary, …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/24 12:35 AM
25

If she wanted me to than I would, but ideally I think both people should be working equally, that way they can have more money, which should make life easier for both of them.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/24 12:17 AM
1

Yes, I'm always willing to hear more, since your tag indicates you are a woman I would find your perspective very useful too since it would allow me to hear from the 'other side' and get a viewpoint I dont always get (if that makes sense)
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 10:56 PM
1

>If I may, what happened to these dates that caused them to fall off? It's hard to say for certain, one didn't show and one broke it off citing prior engagements before ghosting me. Whatever the real reason is impossible to say with any certainty, so I don't dwell on it. After all this was a lot of attention in such a short time (2 just in 1 single calendar year) so it was really more of an excitement than a let down. In fact I'm sort of still riding the wave now, thinking that greater fortune m…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 10:24 PM
1

What things do you think she would do to make you really, truly appreciate her? It's a purely hypothetical situation so it's hard to say, if she didn't respect me or treat me with dignity I would guess not much outside of being my girlfriend. Honestly dude you need to raise your standards for yourself. That's awful. Thank you for the kind words! While that wouldn't of course be the ideal situation it would be one I would be happy to settle for. After all beggars can't be choosers. And it's not l…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 10:20 PM
1

I didn't say it was fair just that I would be willing to live with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 10:09 PM
1

Would you get a stripper of the opposite sex at your bachelor party/hens right? No, I wouldn't want to be unfaithful and would see that as being unfaithful Would you let your partner get one at his/hers? (Stripper of their opposite sex) Yes, while I wouldn't like it I wouldn't want to upset her or cause her to leave so I would express the fact I don't like it before moving on Would you let your partner attend a friends bachelor party or hens night of a friend bit featuring a stripper of the oppo…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 09:16 PM
2

Thank you for the kind words. The good news is most women are good people so if I ever get into a relationship it's probably going to be a good one.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 08:02 PM
1

>Have you ever been on a date? I went on kind of date 11 years ago in 2013, though it was more a friend thing, than a proper "date-date" > And if no, what's been the reason? Have you tried and had no luck, or do you mostly avoid it altogether? Yes, I have been on the grind trying to get a gf for a little over 20 years now. I've had a bit of recent success actually in that about five years I started using on line dating, and that has really opened things up for me. I swipe right 100 times a day a…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 07:50 PM
1

>Again, how?? A relationship where a partner isn't treating you with dignity or respect is gonna be one where it would be difficult to find intimate moments worth learning from. difficult, but not impossible. She might not be willing to accept my romantic advances too often (and I certainly wouldn't want to overdue it) but on the off occasion she is willing than I would learn from that. Besides just sex there would be other things I can practice like bringing her flowers or rubbing her feet, or …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 07:11 PM
1

>You've never been in a relationship, so your perspective is a bit flawed. You are right about this, it's possible that once I get into a relationship I'd quickly find out it's not good for me and bail. It's hard to know without actually going on a date. >How? Conversing with her? If she really teats you with no dignity or respect, do you think she'd tell you why? I'd hope so, she did enter into a relationship with me so perhaps she would be willing to tell me the areas I can improve upon to get…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 07:04 PM
1

What I mean is I can learn about stuff I don't know about that is important to maintaining a relationship, both how to do things intimately and just how to do things in general in a romantic relationship. My assumption is, since we are in a relationship, we would have intimate and romantic moments. Even if, for example she's not treating me with respect and is cheating on me that does not necessarily mean she wouldn't be intimate with me from time to time nor would it mean she wouldn't do other …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 06:07 PM
1

That is an interesting perspective. For me personally I think that as long as we're not getting into dangerous life and death territory (no gf is worth your life) or she's not breaking my bones or causing other serious bodily harm I suppose it would be fine, especially if I'm able to make some progress in reducing her disrespectfulness and abuse. If I'm not or if she starts to escalate things than yeah I would definitely have to put things on pause and consider if the relationship is really wort…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 05:42 PM
2

You bring up a very good point, some of the stuff I learn could be the wrong stuff. I guess I would just be taking a chance then that, despite learning bad stuff, perhaps I would pick up some useful pointers I could apply to future relationships (assuming I have to give up this one), and it's possible I guess that a 'good partner' might be willing to overlook some of this stuff. Though I thank you for this new perspective, I didn't stop to consider not all learning is good learning, some is the …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 05:35 PM
1

I understand now though I think this is an area I'll have to disagree with you on. I would like to be in a relationship and have never been in one, as such if I can, to borrow your expression, 'make the dog less likely to bite me' that would be excellent, and I would be very happy in such a relationship, I don't see why it should have to be less fun.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 05:04 PM
1

I am sorry English is not my native language can you expand on what you mean so I can understand.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 04:54 PM
1

Thank you for your kind words, though I guess this is an issue where we have to agree to disagree. Personally speaking seeking things like 'respect' and 'dignity' seem to be a bit too high standards for me (at least for my situation), though I understand why others might value them and consider not getting them deal breakers. I'd never been in a relationship before so I really can't 100% say for certain if such a situation would be a bad deal or not though I would certainly like to try it out. B…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 04:46 PM
1

what I mean by this is I will get some experience with handling certain aspects of relationships I've never had before. I would learn how to do things that I don't have any experience doing now both in terms of physical intimacy stuff and just general romantic things. I don't know if I worded that right (English is not my first language) but you get the idea.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 04:07 PM
2

>No relationship is worth a lack of respect and dignity, I promise you. I don't necessarily agree with this, I mean as long as she's not committing acts of life threatening abuse I don't see any reason not to try and fix the relationship. It's possible that I could be able to figure out why shy does not respect me or value my dignity and than I can work on fixing those reasons. Besides if it doesn't work out than the longer I'm in the relationship before it ends the more experience I can get tow…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 04:03 PM
0

I guess it's kind of subjective. For me personally I'm 37 and haven't been in a relationship before so it would seem kind of a rash decision to throw away the first one I get over something like a 'lack of respect'. I mean if a lack of respect doesn't involve extreme life threatening physical abuse than I see no reason not to try and work on it. Besides even if things don't work out I will get valuable relationship experience which I can apply to other relationships and will clear the virgin red…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 03:57 PM
0

>If you aren't getting respect, empathy, or dignity from your partner, don’t offer that in the relationship. Build a relationship around other aspects like having fun. Despite what a lot of the other commenters are saying I actually agree with this. I'm 37 and have never been in a relationship before so I wouldn't want to leave and jeopardize the first one I've been in over things like a lack of respect and dignity. Instead of fun though I would work on finding ways to fix the relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 03:47 PM
2

Relevant: https://tenor.com/view/what-can-skinny-women-do-gif-19510615 As a 37 year old virgin I would just be happy to get a date. Besides all that superficial stuff: height, weight, appearance etc, is just that- superficial, doesn't say anything about what shes like on the inside, personally speaking if I really had to choice I like a woman with a little extra meet on the bone.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 03:42 PM
2

There are some advantages to being short. You have enoguh leg room on the airplance You're last to get rained on That's all I can think of at the moment.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 01:58 AM
3

I can’t imagine sleeping with, dating, or being married/committed to someone I wasn’t attractive to and attracted to. I personally disagree, as a 37 year old virgin I would just be happy to get a date. Besides all that superficial stuff: height, weight, appearance etc, is just that- superficial, doesn't say anything about what shes like on the inside. She could be the ugliest person ever and if she was willing to go out with me that would instantly make her attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 01:57 AM
3

161 cm (5'3") here Do you struggle with the airline seats?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/24 01:54 AM
2

Mr. Soprano is not a murderer, he is a hard working family man who works in waste management, owns a strip club, and has never done anything wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/24 08:45 PM
1

hello fellow eastern European (Baltics states here) из какой части россии ты?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/24 08:44 PM
2

Do your friends let me stop you right there
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/24 08:38 PM
1

I am sorry this is happening to you. For me personally I recognize beggars can't be choosers and, even if I didn't approve of your lifestyle or something you were doing to me I wouldn't ask you to change because, as I previously stated, beggars can't be choosers and if you knew what you were doing when you entered the relationship
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/24 08:34 PM
1

>Have you tried any surgery yet I am 161 cm (5'3") so I've considered height surgery before but it doesn't seem safe and effective. >If you havent piqued a womans interest enough to date you in over 20 years its brutally over I don't know about this, I starting using on line dating about five years ago and by swiping right a hundred times a day every day I was able to get a few dozen matches, a few conversations, and I was even able to get a couple women to agree to go out with me 2 years ago (t…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/24 08:29 PM
5

I would be horrified, nobody should ever strike a woman so seeing a video of one I love being harmed would be deeply shocking and upsetting. I would try to comfort her as best I could and make sure she's OK.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/24 07:05 AM
1

>But if there's an added element like >He's approaching everyone lol I feel attacked on this one.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/24 12:50 AM
2

>or East Europe I am from the Baltics...
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/24 12:39 AM
2

>Average lifetime count is 4-7 Me, a 37 year old virgin, "uh.... well this is awkward".
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/24 06:00 PM
12

Sorry English is not my native language, I mean the fact she is approaching first means shes willing to out with me, which is huge. I've managed to get 2 women to agree to go out with me before (actually only a couple years ago) but these fell through due to logistical reasons so another one would always be big. Despite my lack of success I do think it will happen within the next five years or so, I just have to keep working at it, and if she approached me first that would be big.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/24 04:50 PM
21

I would view that as good. I'm 37 and have been (unsuccessfully) making the first move for over 20 years now, it would be nice to have someone else do it for once, not to mention it would mean shes willing to go out with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/24 04:28 PM
3

For me personally, as a 37 year old virgin, things like 'attractiveness' really don't matter much. I'm in no position to be picky (beggars can't be choosers) so I cast a wide net.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/24 04:06 PM
1

that it what I do, one must cast a wide net if you want to catch something
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/24 04:03 PM
5

>Do you think that maybe a tot different attitude, and chang what you are doing might make some difference? I think yes, despite the lack of success thus far I do think that by changing my approach and tackling the problem from different angles I'm on the right track. For example about five years ago I started using online dating and, after swiping right 100 times a day for a few years, I was able to get a few dozen matches and a couple years ago I even got 2 women to agree to go on a date with …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/24 06:04 AM
0

very true, I am 37 and I am just as dumb as when I was 17
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/24 04:08 AM
19

>If it doesn't work you can always try something else. This is very true. I am 37 and while I've yet to get into a relationship I've been asking women out for a little over 20 years now I can't imagine still using the same tactics and adhering to the same advice I'd received in 2003. You have to try out different strategies, test them like a scientist to see how effective they are, and if they don't yield any results drop them and move onto something else. Not to mention as you get older you go …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/24 04:06 AM
7

>When I was 20, just barely before I lost my virginity, I had a dreadful sense that I was behind in life 37 year old virgin here, while I don't think it's over for me just yet I definitely get that, 'I'm behind' thinking as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/24 12:32 AM
1

Really? I would have assumed it would have been much higher than 60% given this is reddit
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/24 10:03 PM
1

I am 37 and can say from personal experience it was never hot
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/24 10:01 PM
3

>Cold approach sucks. I agree, I'm 37 and have been both cold and approaching for about 20 years now, I can say from my firsthand experience that while I've never gotten a date either way (well I did get a 'friend-date' thing once about 11 years ago from warm approaching) I can say that people were far less receptive to cold approaching than to warm approaching
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/24 09:51 PM
3

I guess so, theres not really much I can do about it though, just have to keep trying. I don't know why but I do have a feeling things migth turn around for me soon (within the next couple years)
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/24 09:31 PM
10

>A man being an adult virgin is a warning sign that there's something wrong with you. Something wrong with you means that you're weak in some regard(s). Women are not attracted to weak men. That is unfortunate, I am a 37 year old virgin and while I knew women probably didn't view it favorably I was surprised after I started viewing this sub to see just how universally unfavorable it is viewed. Theres not really much I can do with this information it's just surprising to know.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/24 09:11 PM
11

I am a 37 year old virgin, I don't really see a reason to lie about it though most even if women don't find it attractive they don't seem to think you're immoral for it and it doesn't seem right to start a relationship on a lie (especially if they figure out the lie later)
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/24 08:31 PM
1

>Why not seek someone with more education and intelligence as your partner I've never had a partner >Why not seek partners who earns more than you? I do, just as a seek women who earn less. I don't understand the opposition some people have to more money, it probably makes life easier? >Why not seek taller, more ambitious, more accomplished, etc? I do, just as I seek women who aren't taller, are less ambitious, and are less accomplished. I find the first bit (taller) kind of funny though, I'm 16…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/24 07:00 PM
7

>The mode is 0 for sure lol, as a 37 year old virgin I'm happy to see my people are fairly represented
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/24 05:54 PM
18

>N-count: >Male|8.826612903 🧢
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/24 05:19 PM
–

>that majority of men are dating, in education, engaging in sex, marrying, working, moving out. It’s only a small percentage of men that aren’t. That’s the main reason why people fail to sympathize with incels simply because most haven’t gone through that harsh reality Me, a 37 year old virgin: "I am the 1%"
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/24 04:40 PM
1

>"Safe" is relative I mena I see a lot of people on crutches when I look into it online and I wouldn't want that, but I do think it would be nice to have some extra centimeters, if nothing else than to reach higher places, combine these with shoe lifts and you know maybe I could really get up there.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/24 04:37 PM
3

Yes, I do meet my standards of simply existing and being of age.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/24 04:25 PM
3

Perhaps, I'm 161 cm (5'3") so if some sort of surgery ever existed for this (and was safe and effective) I would do it.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/24 06:03 AM
1

I'm still trying to figure out how to do the first part
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/24 02:45 AM
1

*Checks flair* Me, a 37 year old virgin, "26? You gotta pump those numbers up. Those are rookie numbers"
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/24 02:44 AM
1

My dating age range is about 21 to 26 and if any man that old is still a virgin its a huge turnoff. *Laughs in 37 year old virgin*
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/24 02:38 AM
2

21-22 is dicey, yellow flag but not a dealbreaker. but after that, it’s a no from me. Me, a 37 year old virgin: "Well, this is awkward".
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/24 02:37 AM
1

Really? I'm your neighbor (from the Baltics) and I haven't notice this online.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/24 02:35 AM
4

I agree, she can be however she wants to be, so long as she is just there.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/24 08:40 PM
2

>4 foot 11 guy I'm 161 cm, I get this 100%
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/24 08:36 PM
9

I can't speak for other places, but I'm from Croatia and I can assure you you'd be disappointed with us. I am from the Balkans and I agree.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/24 05:31 PM
2

I don't understand why theres such an opposition to this, it's a rule he and his wife have for their marriage, if it works for them good for them, you're allowed to have limits and boundaries in a relationship for you and your partner. And if they're both fine with it then so what?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/24 05:23 PM
1

I am 161 cm (5'3") it is a bit disconcerting to see what some people are labeling as the cutoff for short
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/24 08:41 PM
8

I am 161 cm (like 5'3" in American units), if I wasn't willing to date women taller than me I wouldn't be willing to date any
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/24 08:38 PM
2

>Cons: The pain, rage, and shame men feel for not meeting women's standards remains the same. I don't necessarily think you are right about this for option one, I am 37 years old and I have been asking women out for about twenty years now without success (that's longer than some people here have been alive) and I can tell you personally I don't really feel "pain" or "rage" and especially not shame from it (if I wasn't ashamed I wouldn't freely admit to being a virgin). To be honest I don't reall…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/24 08:15 PM
1

why would you? If you're somebody who doesn't have many options, such as myself, going out with somebody you don't find attractive is a no brainer, after all it's quite possible you could become attractive to them over time so it's not wise to let something superficial like attraction hold you back. This is just my opinion though, speaking as a 37 year old virgin, if you're someone who has more romantic options available it's possible this restriction won't apply to you.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/24 06:49 PM
2

just because some people don’t grow wiser doesn’t mean it’s a common thing I agree I am 37 and I am just as stupid as when I was 17
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/24 06:37 PM
1

These options don't exist for guys like me, so being too picky isn't a relevant factor. Absolutely agree got to cast as wide as a net as we can and hope something bites.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/24 07:41 AM
7

>These options don't exist for guys like me, so being too picky isn't a relevant factor. Absolutely agree got to cast as wide as a net as we can and hope something bites.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/24 07:41 AM
1

Thank you for your kind words, while I would be OK with an abusive relationship that is not life threatening (beggars can't be choosers after all) I would definitely prefer one that not abusive. The good news is that most women are generally good people who are not abusive so theres not too much need to worry as if I ever get into a relationship it is likely to not be an abusive one, which is good.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/24 12:19 AM
1

Oh, dude, it’s just depressing. I'm sorry if I depressed you, English is not my native language so my word choice might not have been the best How old are you? 37
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/24 11:27 PM
1

I really do not think that abusive relationship is "valuable relationships experience". The part where I'm being abused probably isn't valuable, but there would probably be other things I could learn from and apply into future relationships. Besides it also would give me some social proofs, there are a lot of people who see being a virgin as a potential red flag, by having some prior relationship experience (even if bad) I could still point to it to indicate I am not a virgin. Being a good perso…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/24 06:08 PM
1

I suppose it's all subjective, if the abuse is really rough and dangerous than probably not but if it's not too severe I think it would be worth at least trying out in order to get into a relationship. Besides if it's become too intense I can always leave and have valuable relationship experience which I can apply to other relationships in the future and will give me a bit of social proof to show others that I can get into a relationship and am not a virgin. Not to mention it's possible that by …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/24 05:21 PM
1

That does not seem to be the case, at least to me, I am 37 and unfortunately I have not had such attention before, though perhaps there are steps I need to take I'm not aware of to get this kind of woman to go for me?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/24 04:44 PM
1

If anything becomes more popular it will probably be more online services because men get their fix and women avoid the dangers of these undesirable men’s backlash when it sinks in that those women were only nice to them for money. I agree with you, online services are definitely a great way for sexless men to have some romantic contact with women without the moral or safety concerns that goes along with prostitution. I've been doing it for over a year now and it's great as it allows me the abil…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/24 03:40 AM
2

I don't know, I'm 37 and never been in a relationship so I just think it would be nice to be an option, safe or otherwise
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/24 10:41 PM
1

I have been using the apps for probably five or so years now and, with an amazing and brilliant strategy of swiping right 100 times a day, I've managed to get probably a few dozen matches over though the actual number of those who responded is significantly lower, still I actually managed to get two women to agree to meet for a date a couple years ago though the dates unfortunately never materialized. So I suppose for matches would be good as it would give me more opportunities. Not to mention m…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/24 09:35 PM
2

I understand the point you are making however it would seem like, since we are unable to control what others do, matching with more women is the best step for a man to take. I mean if, say 1 in 80 women would ever match with you, than it would smart to swipe right on at least eighty woman so you're statically likely to get one. Personally I think, given the many difficulties with online dating, it shouldn't be the only thing men try but rather one of several things they try. I try dating women i…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/24 06:16 PM
3

Not in Europe where the ratio apparently is nearly 50/50. I'm European, so I speak from that perspective. what part of Europe are you from? I'm from the shitty part (one of the former SSR countries) and I can tell you firsthand that the apps swing heavily male in their total userbase, which is why I think it shouldn't be the only tool men use to approach women but rather another option outside of irl.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/24 04:36 PM
3

but I think it is made far worse by so many men swiping right on everyone If men were more selective, they'd likely experience less rejection on the apps If a man is having trouble using a dating website or app shouldn't he be more inclusive on who he tries to match with? Not swiping right is leaving a potential match on the table and if he's struggle with the app can he really afford to do that? Besides it's not like anyone will know rather or not he swiped right on everyone or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/24 04:34 PM
1

I would be happy if my partner earned more than me, whose going to complain about more money coming in? That has to make our live easier
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/24 06:52 AM
1

yes I agree, that's why I said 'lol' in my original answer, though I guess that particular question wasn't really applicable to me. It's also why my answers a bit vague, having not been in a relationship before I'm not 100% sure what to expect from a woman romantically so I figure I would be best served to leave that up to her and not risk saying or expecting something untactful After all, my goal with dating the past couple decades (I'm 37) has just been to get into the relationship, not so muc…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/24 06:00 AM
1

no, though not for lack of trying.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/24 05:11 AM
2

How would you like to be romanced? What big or little gestures would you view as romantic towards you? However she would want is fine, what's important is the fact she went out of her way to do something special, the thought put into however she decided to be romantic is the most important thing Has any woman ever been romantic towards you? lol, no Do you only view grand gestures as romance or could little gestures also be romantic? Small things are nice too, in fact it's probably easier for her…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/24 04:50 AM
1

I agree with you, it is important that we continue to self improve, though after more than a decade of the self improving I must admit it gets a bit tiring (and it feels as though I may have a limit), still I think it's important to also widens my net to encompass as many potential dates as possible. I understand what you mean about being alone, it can be very fulfilling if you that's your sort of thing, however after 20 years of asking women out and being single I would like to try out being in…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/24 03:25 AM
1

I mean that's still something though isn't it? I'm 37 virgin and I figure at this point I really can't afford to be picky with a lot of those superficial things like having children or, to borrow your words, being ugly. I mean to get to this stage and be single I must not be too highly valued of a catch myself so I'm not really in any position to be choosy.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/24 02:19 AM
1

I have to disagree, I think beggars can't be choosers and if you want to catch anything you need to cast as wide a net as you can.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/24 08:15 PM
1

more of her to love
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/24 08:14 PM
23

Only 10% of men are virgins at 24 so your perspective is in the minority. Me, a 37 year old virgin: "uh.... well this is awkward".
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/24 08:45 PM
12

Honestly at this point in my life (37 years old) without any romantic success just being interested in me would be a pretty big turn on
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/24 05:52 PM
1

Thank you, English is not my native language so I wasn't sure I was understanding, now I understand using the tripod to record the weightlifting to check your form.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/24 06:20 AM
1

I'm not familiar with weightlifting terminology what does a tripod mean/do in this situation?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/24 05:37 AM
6

I don't know about everyone else but when you get to be a 37 year old virgin, as I am, you tend to cast as wide a net as you can, as a result, while it's certainly not desirable traits for a woman to have, you really can't be picky about things like this.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/24 04:42 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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