Ok-Cicada5911 Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
6	Her vehicle loan shows up on my credit report		Ok-Cicada5911	/r/Divorce_Men	07/03/24 06:02 PM

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
1	What are some easy or simple hobbies you took on to be more social or productive? Software engineer.	/r/Divorce_Men	18/03/24 09:53 PM
1	What are some easy or simple hobbies you took on to be more social or productive? I've been connecting with former coworkers or old friends and chasing their hobbies. Kind of tackles the "social" part. One surfs. Been doing that every other week. It's just the two of us and friendly hellos to other surfers. Another friend mountain bikes. Been doing that here or there. That's a larger community of about a dozen people. I ride a motorcycle. There are groups around but I'm not a fan of riding with randoms. Not really interested in no gear squid riding. Track days are more respon…	/r/Divorce_Men	18/03/24 01:22 PM
6	Sitting sick at home Pretty par for the course. Healing is non-linear. Try to shake it off. If you feel you can't recover, seek therapy. Get it diagnosed as depression. This will help mentally and with courts/work. I was at 0-50% at work for a long time. Long time. Counted in months if not years. I couldn't get away with it at my previous job. It was sprint driven with epics and stories. We'd report in daily and tally successes every two weeks. I took 6 weeks short-term disability, went back, wasn't much better. I v…	/r/Divorce_Men	14/03/24 03:26 PM
5	Divorce at 47 with depression Hold onto hope. I'm over 50. I've been diagnosed with a mood disorder but despite it, I am "high functioning." I do pretty well at work. My divorce hit me like a ton of bricks. Anxiety is often paired with depression. I learned to see both depression and anxiety as "a temporary trick of the mind." If you can survive until tomorrow, you'll be fine. If you can't make it to tomorrow, jump on cardio. (I went from 270lb to 180lb). Meditation is good as a emotional control tool. Journaling is good for…	/r/Divorce_Men	08/03/24 03:45 PM
2	Temporarily Suspended STBX cell service Mileage may very, but in my case, it took four or five attempts for AT&T to get it right. Time was counted in hours. I had a choice between an AI script and a human script reader. The AT&T website was hit or miss. 50% of the time it crashed. AT&T made a new account but it got entangled with the old one. It didn't help that my ex was livid about the sun rising. She offered no cooperation and actually went with "what will upset him the most" games. The accounts were entangled in weird ways. They s…	/r/Divorce_Men	26/02/24 04:40 PM
2	Temporarily Suspended STBX cell service Phones are like key rings these days. My phone number serves as 2FA/MFA for any number of VPN, RDP, and SSO work accounts in additional to all sorts of personal accounts. As a general rule, workplace interference upsets judges here quite a bit. I'd actually recommend going out of your way to separate accounts without affecting hers at all. Document what you're doing and why. It's a somewhat rare request for phone companies and it doesn't always go as well as it should.	/r/Divorce_Men	26/02/24 05:03 AM
2	It’s over! Congrats!! Similar experience. And I remember the feeling. It ranks pretty damn high. Birth of my children. My college graduation. Finally getting term sheets. Soak in the good vibes brother.	/r/Divorce_Men	23/02/24 07:26 PM
5	Ex doesn’t want to file Similar experience. She moved out, lawyered up. Her lawyer sent an official looking letter on really nice bond paper. "I'm a lawyer and I am representing Mrs. X in the dissolution of your marriage." Then ... nothing. Six months later I actually filed. I didn't take her words at face value. I thought the silence was soul searching or something. Nope, she was out reinventing herself. She was lazy in marriage, even lazier in divorce. As far as reputation amongst friends and family, you will be the …	/r/Divorce_Men	23/02/24 07:18 PM
5	How you guys fucked up in your marriages? I cannot comment on pending litigation. :) I gained weight, went from 185 to 270. She ballooned from 105 to 200. I kept re-drawing new lines in the sand. I should have stood my ground, divorced a decade earlier. I stayed in the marriage for the kids. I put too much pressure on her to get a real career. She hovered at $50k. Lots of stress for her and me both. I bought a house very late in life. I didn't invest my money well. I didn't stop her from spending trivially (at her worst, $2000 in one mo…	/r/Divorce_Men	21/02/24 04:50 PM
2	What made you not lose your mind? How did you cope? Taking it slowly helps. I worried about everything at once. Took a while, but I was able to reframe that / prioritize and worry about one (fixable) thing at a time. Thinking along the lines of what was spared helps. My children are healthy. I'm healthy. People face much worse challenges ...	/r/Divorce_Men	21/02/24 03:40 PM
4	Her new BF Ego and a sense of ownership are red flags. No one uses WordPerfect any more. Amateur websites are written by amatures. Looking up court documents on a court document website isn't difficult. It's almost like it was designed for that purpose. You need to find a new hobby.	/r/Divorce_Men	15/02/24 09:44 PM
1	Thoughts on my situation? Am I in a good position? Considering the equity buyout is also a support buyout, have your lawyer run a present value calculation. He/She should have an idea of what monthly support will look like and be able to roughly predict what that lifecycle of support will ultimately produce N years down the line in today's dollars. If that dollar amount plus 50% of the shared equity is bigger than 45k, you have a bargaining chip. Doesn't mean you have to use it if it's not your thing. But it will add leverage elsewhere in the ne…	/r/Divorce_Men	14/02/24 11:54 PM
24	Why do women like to see us suffer even when they are the ones that chose to leave ? Most women know their role in the divorce, that it's a significant role, and that they behaved poorly many many many times. They know how they contributed to the divorce. Angry women hide it all and deny it. They are well aware they are glossing over a mountain of facts. This unbalances them mentally. A lot of anger is born of just mishandling the truth. Women who are taking advantage know that one human should never be indentured to another. It's criminal. Yet they openly support servitude unde…	/r/Divorce_Men	30/01/24 04:00 PM
3	How to stop looking back So she just drove off a cliff in a game of chicken. Do you think it'll end better by pointing her to another cliff?	/r/Divorce_Men	20/12/23 11:28 PM