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Ok_Common_2867 Archive

View 1 post and 121 comments by Ok_Common_2867 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
17

Ok_Common_2867/r/askMRP26/08/25 08:25 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
2

Nice work this week. A great leader has a great vision. A place everyone wants to go. He does a good job of casting it and getting everyone on board -- many people will deal with a real asshole if they like where they believe it takes them (see the personas of Steve Jobs and Elon Musk). He doesn't look back to see if anyone is following him, because he doesn't care (he is his own judge). One of the hard parts for me was that I saw myself different almost right away, but everyone just saw the old…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/07/26 03:37 PM
1

Ok. But what are you going to do about it? For example, are you taking accountability for your own life and that of your family? I’m not talking about apologizing, I’m asking about a mindset where you own your own shit and all of hers too. Or do you do things like resent her when she wants to do something that fucks shit up, even though you went along?
/r/MarriedRedPill15/07/26 12:02 PM
2

she gets mad when I request or tell her what to do She doesn't trust you to lead. What did you do to deserve that? Posting here is a good sign of personal leadership, but are you doing enough? Do you lead yourself well? Many people decide they want to be the boss because they don't think the boss is doing a good job. I wish I remember who here said it, but it was true for me. As soon as I starting demonstrating that I was a leader that everyone in the family wanted to follow, things turned aroun…
/r/MarriedRedPill14/07/26 10:05 PM
1

Engage with her again. Don't bring elephant in the room(your kiss) and there is a good chance she will respond. Then just game her a bit and tell her to meet you. Good idea. I'm thinking I'll wait about a week and then invite her to do something fun like a concert.
/r/MarriedRedPill15/05/26 03:03 AM
1

Exactly the kind of clarity that keeps me coming back. Thank you.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/05/26 03:06 PM
4

You aren’t from around here are you?
/r/askMRP12/05/26 11:54 PM
1

OYS 24 (last OYS) 50yo 5’9” 161 lbs 15% bf, Married for 20+, 3 kids. My mission is to lead myself first. To build things that solve problems with strength and clarity. I act with integrity and intent, creating value for others by choice, not obligation. Physical: Lifted 4 times, after skipping Monday. My current program has me going for maxes this week. Feeling optimistic I’ll hit a number of PRs. Plan to lift all five days, going for a PR on every exercise. Mindset: Feeling lost this week. I’m …
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/26 10:34 PM
1

They just want leadership, and by all accounts in your OYS, you suck at it. This exactly! u/Direct_Charity_2575 Leadership is the single greatest skills a man can have. First you lead yourself, then you lead others. You might consider adding leadership to your vision, as well as your weekly OYS posts to ensure you make progress every week on being the leader your family needs.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/26 10:06 PM
1

If there is anything I learned the hard way it was to STFU. Seriously. Anything I said just made it worse. In fact all of this stuff is difficult to internalize and even trying it out just ended up with me being incongruent. If I were able to talk to my old self, I'd tell him to read as much as he can, post here for 6 months before trying to implement anything.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/26 09:49 PM
2

Four OYS posts and not a mention of game? Do you even try to turn your wife on, or do you just expect her to get turned on the second you want sex?
/r/MarriedRedPill12/05/26 09:41 PM
1

100% correct. But now I know what I want and she isn’t it. But plow horses keep plowing because that’s what they’ve always done. Am I using my anger as an excuse to not do what I know needs to be done? Or is the anger truly clouding my judgement? I’ll just work through my anger for now.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/03/26 03:55 PM
1

that means she has to police her emotions around you, that means she can't be vulnerable with you. If you realised that she was comfort testing you, why didn't you comfort her instead of proving that her feelings are invalid. Her feelings are irrational because she is a bloody woman. Why didn't you capitalise on those feelings to create sexual tension? You are 100% correct, I don't know how to respond to comfort tests in a way that makes it so she can feel vulnerable around me. I don't know how …
/r/MarriedRedPill25/03/26 03:25 PM
-1

OYS 23 49yo 5’9” 167 lbs 18% bf, Married for 20+, 3 kids. My mission is to lead myself first. To build things that solve problems with strength and clarity. I act with integrity and intent, creating value for others by choice, not obligation. Current goal: Let go of my anger Physical: Weight is trending down, which is counter to my lifting efforts. A month ago I found out I had high cholesterol and I’ve found it more difficult to eat enough. This week I’ll purposely find foods with high calories…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/03/26 08:36 PM
1

Yep, I fucked this up and I own it. Next time I will just put it in her month, and then fuck her.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/03/26 04:03 PM
1

She takes you for granted, she knows you won't leave because you aren't able to lead, you have no friends and no game. No one wants to follow a leader who isn't accountable, and your words are all excuses for why it isn't your fault. You mention what she says, but not how you respond. I'd guess is you still DEER and generally engage with her like a women (heterosexual women, don't like to fuck other women). You didn't own your shit in your OYS, you have no plan to get better. You came here years…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/03/26 03:57 PM
1

OYS 22 49yo 5’9” 169 lbs 18% bf, Married for 20+, 3 kids. My mission is to lead myself first. To build things that solve problems with strength and clarity. I act with integrity and intent, creating value for others by choice, not obligation. Current goal: Let go of my anger Physical: Lifted 5 days. 1 day of snowboarding. Sets with progress this week: Curl 20lb x 15. Leg press 280x12. DB Fly 30lb x 14. This will be week 3 of this routine, optimistic I’ll show progress in more than just 3 sets. R…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/03/26 11:19 AM
1

Thanks for pointing out that I am still angry. It's hard for me to accept, but I appreciate you hitting me over the head with it. I own it. I'll spend the rest of the week recognizing when I'm doing things because of this anger, accepting it, then choosing to move on from it.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/03/26 04:52 PM
1

Your feelings don't fucking matter. What you do and say does. 100% agree. But tell me, when was the last time masturbating about your feelings worked? I'm reflecting on my actions to determine why I did what I did. Mental masturbation is a favorite pastime of mine, but you are right that it doesn't help. Understanding I was being a dick to her last thanksgiving because I was grieving my own failures, helped me process that grief, though. So that would be the last time that I can think of.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/03/26 11:16 PM
2

I don't know you or your wife, how could I know? I think it's a question worth asking. I got the idea from others here, then read it in the book from the moderator u/RStonePT that says "She Doesn’t Get Sole Custody Of Your Libido. She Gets First Crack At It." He does a better job of explaining why the question is worth considering than I do in the book Praxeology Vol 2: Dread
/r/MarriedRedPill12/03/26 11:05 PM
1

Thanks for the ego shield perspective, I'll give that a lot of consideration. Yes, I have my values written down. I've had them documented and my missions statement since I first read 7 Habits of highly effective people in 2019. I have read past WISNIFG, I only list what I'm currently reading, not what I've read. Here is what I've read (only including relationship and MRP books) in the past 15 months since I discovered RP. NMMNG x2, MAP, Rational Male year one (and other years), Sixteen Commandm…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/03/26 07:40 PM
1

That makes sense. I'll reflect more on why I choose those words ,that seem incongruous with my feelings. Considering which is the truth. You didn't explain how your anger was resolved, you just say it went away. Unresolved anger turns into contempt. I thought I was over the anger phase in September. Around thanksgiving, I blew up at her and told her "get the fuck out of my bed, you fucking bitch." The next day I had to confront my actions and accept I was still angry -- I didn't say anything to …
/r/MarriedRedPill12/03/26 06:35 PM
0

I had some opportunities to cheat but didn't. It was all just mental masturbation. I need to fix my sex life with my wife or leave her. All this messaging girls I know or downloading dating apps is just a way for me to avoid that confrontation and avoid problems. What if cheating was the one thing that would actually fix your sex life with your wife? Could you do it? Would you stay with her then?
/r/MarriedRedPill12/03/26 05:23 PM
1

Thanks. I reflected on his comment more, after I wrote this, and now see where my hamstering about losing control during sex was because I was totally in her frame. I do not feel angry and even after re-reading what I wrote and looking for words that indicate that I expressed anger or frustration at my wife. I don't understand why he thinks I'm angry.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/03/26 05:07 PM
1

You are of course right. I realized when i was angry, that I was grieving. My years wasted as a beta bitch. Time when I failed to lead myself and my family and sat in my shit for so long. Inaction haunts me, wondering if I'm too scared to do what I need to do.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/03/26 12:38 AM
0

Dude, the problem ain't her, it's you. You're still unattractive. Stop all this nonsense and start working to become a captain she can trust. I couldn't agree more that the problem is me. And I totally see what you doing there mocking me for thinking the grass is greener. You aren't wrong. This whole process has me wondering if I even like her. If she were gone tomorrow, would I be better off? Am I attached to her or the life we have built? This is about more than sex, it's about who I'm going t…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/03/26 08:32 PM
1

Appreciate the feedback, can you tell me what I wrote that made you write "how deep in her frame and anger you are" so I can reflect on it more?
/r/MarriedRedPill10/03/26 08:18 PM
1

Thanks for your help. I lift 5 days a week because I like the routine of starting my day at the gym. I snowboard because it's fun (I MTB when there is no snow). I use the smith machine because when I get injured, it takes me so long to recover, which prevents me from making progress.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/03/26 08:16 PM
0

Yes, you are right I did. I appreciate any feedback I get, negative or positive.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/03/26 08:12 PM
0

OYS 21 49yo 5’9” 169 lbs 18% bf, Married for 20+, 3 kids. My mission is to lead myself first. To build things that solve problems with strength and clarity. I act with integrity and intent, creating value for others by choice, not obligation. Current goal: Outcome independence — last fail 2/19/26 Physical: Lifted five days, 5 hours snowboarding. Started a new routine, this week was mostly setting baselines. Close grip push-up 95x16, pin-loaded leg press 280x10, Smith machine good morning 125x11,…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/03/26 12:13 PM
3

can I have something I don´t know? No, you don't have frame if you don't understand it. Your definition is not wrong, but it is incomplete. It is a complicated concept that isn't that easily communicated. I'd suggest the book Praxeology Vol 1:Frame by u/RStonePT
/r/MarriedRedPill06/03/26 12:35 AM
2

You are seriously pathetic. Your first sentence of your first OYS is trying to excuse yourself from what you know is required. No one cares. Write what you have done, what you have learned and what you plan to do. Here, I'll help you (even though it's a lost cause). This week I will practice bench press, squat and dead lifts without any weight, just focusing on form and reps. Write a first draft of my mission.
/r/MarriedRedPill05/03/26 08:48 PM
1

I can try incorporating other behaviors to further build my frame. You don't try to further build frame. You practice assertive responses that make it easy for you to avoid entering someone else's frame. It is an important shift in perspective. Practice one of these a week (ideally with someone other than your fiancé.) Fogging, Amused Mastery, Agree & Amplify, Broken Record, Negative Inquiry, & Negative Assertion. (most of the these are from WISNIFG).
/r/MarriedRedPill05/03/26 08:32 PM
1

Understood, no more conjecture.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/03/26 10:14 PM
1

The app I use to track automatically calculates highlights. It’s easy to pull that number from the highlights.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/03/26 02:40 PM
0

Haha, no. Not exactly. It was actually 25 lbs for 12 reps which is equivalent to 38 lbs 1RM.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/03/26 02:31 PM
1

OYS 20 49yo 5’9” 169 lbs 18% bf, Married for 20+, 3 kids. My mission is to lead myself first. To build things that solve problems with strength and clarity. I act with integrity and intent, creating value for others by choice, not obligation. Current goal: Outcome independence Physical: Lifted 3 days, two days I didn’t make it to the gym as planned. Only one notable improvement to hammer curl 38 lb 1RM. Starting a new routine this week (5-days) as I continue to bulk in March. Then a 4-week cut i…
/r/MarriedRedPill03/03/26 12:45 PM
1

It's called congruency. You were flirting, then she shit tested you and your whole vibe changed from flirting to STFU, just because of her words? If you responded to shit test in a flirty way, then it would have been better. If you are not congruent, then you will not generate attraction, no matter how many shit tests you pass. You are spot on. I felt this when it happened, but it helps to understand why now. Why say anything, just disengage if you want. But no, you NEED to tell her that she is …
/r/MarriedRedPill25/02/26 12:40 AM
1

She can argue whether she's into it, or whether you should care. Out loud and in her own head. No one can argue about what works for you or doesn't. You're the one who determines that. This applies to every statement you make to her, inside or outside the bedroom. Good point. It is always amazing how much you guys pick up from my choice of words.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/02/26 11:28 PM
1

This reads less like a statement and more like a question. Great read, definitely hits close to home.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/02/26 11:26 PM
1

What if I told you, Neo, that this is just another test to see if you get butthurt about "desire"? Who controls the sex then? Can you read between the lines and figure out what I'm pointing out? No doubt it was just a test. You are pointing out that she doesn't feel reactive desire because, in my mind, she controls the sex. She is grasping at the little control she has. But she needs me to be in control to feel desire. "This isn't working for me." Nice! I like that a lot. The focus on me and wha…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/02/26 04:33 PM
2

OYS 19 49yo 5’9” 169 lbs 18% bf, Married for 20+, 3 kids. My mission is to lead myself first. To build things that solve problems with strength and clarity. I act with integrity and intent, creating value for others by choice, not obligation. Current goal: Outcome independence Physical: Lifted five days, de-load week (same routine, but less weight and no sets to failure). No bike ride. Read: WISNIFG, spent the week practicing fogging. Moving on to next skill to practice each for a week. Family: …
/r/MarriedRedPill24/02/26 01:25 PM
1

Yes the progress is consistent. I am planning to ask about my T level when I see the Dr this week.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/02/26 08:52 PM
27

First, this should be in r/askMRP You are the problem man. You have oneitis, anger issues, all the issues. She doesn't love you for the same reason no women would. You need to fix yourself before you have any hope of being with anyone. Stop talking, seriously STFU -- the first step to getting out of a hole is to stop digging. Go to the GYM today and almost every day for the foreseeable future. Read everything in the sidebar, but add Praxeology vol 1: frame as the first course prerequisites.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/02/26 05:18 PM
1

it is all done because she is afraid of losing this man You completely missed it man. You literally are so blue pill, you can't even understand Red Pill. Let me spell it out for you, RP believes anxiety is needed for women to feel desire. Like all women, always. RP is not about intimacy, it is about sex. I know, you find that confusing. That's because you don't know that the definition of intimacy is "close familiarity or friendship; closeness." Intimacy without sex is called the "friend zone," …
/r/askMRP20/02/26 09:46 PM
2

All three of mine were different.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/02/26 04:17 PM
2

I have three kids, this is a bad plan. This could go on for a very long time. I'd consider maybe "only waking up a few times" instead of "through the night."
/r/MarriedRedPill20/02/26 12:46 AM
1

It was a slow week for game. Last weekend I went to a friend's 50th birthday party (with my wife). It was an entire weekend of events. I flirted with all the girls. had a great time and so did they. I also game my wife every day, and approach women when I am out. Just wasn't out this particular week.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/26 06:40 PM
1

I need to aggressively STFU and start making THAT the reflex Truer words were never spoken. Seriously, you'd be 1000x better off losing your tongue right now. Don't try to apply ANYTHING you have learned STFU. I also am working on developing frame. I don’t know what books are best for this Praxeology Volume 1: Frame. Why it isn't the first book in the sidebar is beyond me.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/26 12:22 AM
1

OYS 18 49yo 5’9” 168 lbs 18% bf, Married for 20+, 3 kids. My mission is to lead myself first. To build things that solve problems with strength and clarity. I act with integrity and intent, creating value for others by choice, not obligation. Physical: Lifted four days, MTB ride (1hr). Bent-over Row 145lb 1-RM, Dumbbell bench 72lb 1-RM, Pull-down 158lb 1-RM, Smith squat 251ls 1-RM, Dumbbell press 49lb 1-RM. It has been 13 months since I started lifted (first time ever in my life) and I find prog…
/r/MarriedRedPill18/02/26 12:05 AM
1

"Married Red Pill: Sexual strategy for men in marriage or long term relationships" It seems you have missed the point of this subreddit. It isn't a relationship forum.
/r/MarriedRedPill14/02/26 01:08 AM
1

Seriously, though, if sex is great, why are here?
/r/MarriedRedPill13/02/26 03:13 AM
5

One thing that has worked for me is to notice something about them that I like and then tell them. Not physical. Shoes, jewelry, tattoos, etc. I practice by walking around trying to find the most interesting thing about everyone I see. That way when I do see someone I want to approach, I already have figured out what to say.
/r/seduction18/10/25 08:11 PM
8

Yeah, and more than anything else, there is nothing more pathetic than a man without frame trying to run dread. Unfortunately I learned that the hard way myself.
/r/askMRP15/10/25 04:24 PM
34

This isn’t about her. You got oneitis really bad. Get your shit together. STFU until you have frame and then start the dread. There is nothing unique about your experience. All of us beta bitches are the same. Lift, read, STFU. She’ll come back or she won’t, what matters is you fix yourself.
/r/askMRP14/10/25 12:19 PM
1

I agree with everything you said except the order can matter. I have the common problems of impatience and rushing to apply things I've learned. Maybe if step one was to not only STFU, but finish reading at bare minimum before trying to apply anything. Ultimately, we are all here to swap our experiences, in case they can help others. My experience is stepping on my dick a number of times, only to realize many more have made the same mistakes as I did. Appreciate you taking the time to respond. I…
/r/askMRP13/10/25 07:59 PM
1

One example is a girl had more than a few piercings in her ear. So I said, oh I like your earrings, how many piercings do you have? Then she proudly counted them all. Then I said, are you sure you’re telling me about them all (inferring her clit was pierced)? She laughed and said yes she was. The flirting went up from there.
/r/seduction11/10/25 02:25 PM
1

There’s a lot of great content I plan to keep reading as much as I can. The absence and the order is what I question. I made a lot of mistakes while I was reading them. Those mistakes were covered in Rian’s book and in a much more concise way. Maybe I would’ve made the same mistakes either way, who knows?
/r/askMRP09/10/25 03:29 AM
0

Women look for relationships and men look for sex, and somehow, sometimes, they end up together for a long time. When a man doesn’t want a relationship, it really just means he doesn’t want one with you. Sure, there are exceptions, but the majority of men don’t have commitment issues.
/r/seduction27/09/25 11:53 AM
1

Check out the book Sex God Method by Daniel Rose. It covers the problem you mention and many others.
/r/seduction24/09/25 10:09 PM
8

You are not over reacting and you didn’t fuck up. The perfect girl would not need external validation, exactly what you said.
/r/askMRP21/09/25 05:37 AM
3

It certainly feels like they wanted me to learn a lot of lessons the hard way when they were already in that book
/r/askMRP02/09/25 06:38 PM
1

Exactly
/r/seduction14/08/25 11:57 PM
1

I know you are 100% correct. My concern is that I'm passed the point of no return. This quote from The Way of the Superior Man hit hard: "Once she feels your neediness, once she feels that you need her more than she needs you, she will never trust your masculine core." I'm confident I could start over and fuck, I know she'd find happiness again too (fucking someone else). I'm not confident I can get her to trust my masculine core again. Either way, enough mental masturbation. I've decided to not…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/25 11:31 PM
1

if you want to fuck, go fuck. the fuck does your wife have to do with any of this? I assume you mean to fuck someone else besides my wife while married. I have considered this, I decided it is not in-line with my values -- I'm my own judge. Maybe that makes me a pussy, but I own this decision.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/25 11:19 PM
1

Are you really resetting everyday? Not yet, I read about it last week but haven't implemented it yet. More below. Sounds more likely that your butthurt is so burdensome it’s easier to consider divorce than going and fucking someone else. Not that you should or shouldn’t. Just worth noticing. You aren't wrong. I've thought about fucking someone else, but I'm my own judge and I decided that fucking someone else while in a closed marriage is not in-line with my values. Are you so uncomfortable in y…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/25 11:13 PM
1

Thanks, that looks promising. I'll switch to that plan.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/25 10:58 PM
1

Are you seriously considering divorce, or just hamstering? WTF do you actually want? I want to be a man who fucks. I am willing to next my wife if that is what it takes. I’m focused on myself but I’m not putting all my eggs in one basket. I’m also preparing for divorce, including figuring out what I need to do before I can file and what I would do right after. For now, you're just a drunk captain trying to decide which way to steer the ship. Agreed, so I won’t make a decision now. And I’ll try n…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/08/25 02:54 AM
1

Yep. You’re right. I’ve been doing 3 sets of as many pull-ups as I can 3 days a week for two months and I can only do four. I made the mistake of cutting for a month which set back my goal. I’m going to learn from my mistakes and keeping working until I hit my goal. I’ve googled, watched YouTube and used AI to create a specific plan to reach this goal, but will keep searching for the best plan until I’m there.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/25 10:20 PM
1

I wrote that because I recognized my failure. I did enjoy the hike and the camping. I also want to get better, and still have a lot to learn. There is a lot of great content on the sidebar, so I’ll continue to read it over and over. I also appreciate when others share links to content that is specific to my mistake — lots of great posts aren’t in the sidebar. That’s also why I read through all the other OYS posts each week. I appreciate you taking the time to read and help.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/25 10:13 PM
1

You are right. Why doesn't matter. Thank you.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/25 06:58 PM
1

You right, I forgot my weight and BF this week. I edited my notes to ensure I don't forget in the future. I edited my post to reflect it for others, but it is 160lb 18% BF I've been banned a few times recently, so erroring on the side of not sharing. I did read my post carefully to ensure I wasn't "whinge, piss, and moan about your wife." I'd really appreciate it if you could share what makes it lazy or passive, though.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/25 06:19 PM
1

OYS #16 49yo 5’9” 160 lb 18% BF Married for 20+, 3 kids. My mission is to lead myself first. To build things with technology that solve problems. To enjoy time in nature on my bike. I act with integrity and intent, creating value for others by choice, not obligation. Action plan: To be able to do 8 pull-ups and bench my own weight. Physical: Lifted 3 days. BP 115 x 13 (PR), got back to RDL of 185x8. 4 pull-ups. Still feeling light headed sometimes, going to push through until my follow up with D…
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/25 04:18 PM
1

Of course you are right. My gut reaction to this is she isn't worth it, but I need to consider this more. Thank you.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/08/25 04:13 PM
2

I like to go to the gym early in the morning. So I go to bed early. I typically initiate within an hour of that. Watching documentaries on TV is part of my sleep routine. I do initiate every night, typically. The only time I feel butt hurt is on day three or four of no’s. But in the last few weeks, I’ve gotten a lot better at not clinging to that outcome either.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/08/25 01:39 PM
1

anything your really passionate about? this reads like a woke political speech I’m really passionate about new technology and mountain biking. I spend most of my efforts on my passions. I own a technology company. so what, most people are bp. how did you lead? Leading conversations and making everyone laugh. Planning rides, getting buy in about them from everyone, then creating the route and navigating for the group. Making decisions for the group when there was indecision on what to do. Connect…
/r/MarriedRedPill09/08/25 09:46 PM
1

that's a goal not a plan. Action plan is a reference to "The Mindful Action Plan," These are the red items for me. are you taking creatine? I was taken it at the time, stopped per the doctor's advice. Like you, the Dr mentioned the possibility of being dehydrated. I plan to discuss it with him during my follow up before taking it again. Are you saying that the rejections were nice and gentle so your ego wasn't hurt? Or are you saying your are happy with how you handled it? I'm saying I'm happy w…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/08/25 07:34 PM
1

OYS #15 49yo 5’9” Married for 20+, 3 kids. Here is my last OYS. This is my first OYS since my 30 day ban, I continued to write my OYS and keep it in my personal log to analyze it. So my number sequence will reflect that that the gap. My mindset has been very stable, no longer feel torn, things are getting easier. Realized that I was obsessed with sex after reading this, committed to not tollerate that in myself anymore. My mission is to lead myself first. To build things that solve problems with…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/08/25 03:10 AM
1

OYS #10 49yo 5’9” 160lb. Married for 20+, 3 kids. My mission is to serve others by using my passion for learning and building to solve problems. I lead with integrity, friendliness, and trust, impacting as many lives as I can in ways that matter. Action plan: To be able to do 8 pull-ups and bench my own weight. Go 30 days without: DEERing, Failing fitness tests, Losing my frame or using overt dread Physical:Bench press: 12x115. Leg press 12x365. RDL 12x185. 3-pull ups Lifted 5 days, finally incr…
/r/MarriedRedPill01/07/25 12:59 PM
1

If you take a picture with your shirt off and upload it to ChatGPT, it can also give you an estimate. I found that more accurate than the navy method. A bathroom scale is also an option. This makes it easy to track over time -- although, it's still not the accurate.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/06/25 02:12 PM
1

We don’t want any more kids, and although MMSLP has outlined some potential issues around a vasectomy, I am willing to go through with it. Atol is not a doctor. At least go see one that does the procedure, ask all your questions, and then decide based on the advice of a qualified medical professional. Personally, I got one. It hasn't impacted my libido at all. Physically I don't notice a single side effect from it (other than a week of sore balls). Horn's comment on frame is one I hadn't conside…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/06/25 02:00 PM
2

she always envisioned herself being with a man with a certain look which is basically opposite to how I look Are these things ones that you have any control over? Or are they things like height?
/r/askMRP26/06/25 09:16 PM
2

Doesn't matter if you nuked it or not, what you do now is the same: STFU, lift, read the sidebar. If you work on yourself and she stays, great for you. If you work on yourself and she leaves, great for you. You focus on yourself and gaming her, the relationship is hers to fix. You obviously realize how big of a mistake you made. Trying to talk more about it will only reduce your value in her eyes. There is no way to talk yourself out of this situation. Only actions matter now.
/r/askMRP26/06/25 06:29 PM
6

Never use “dread”. It should always be a natural consequence of your actions when you live according to your values.
/r/askMRP26/06/25 12:50 PM
1

Social: I realized I need to take the lead in this area more. I have been much better at reaching out and making plans, but also counting attending events setup by others as victories. Ha! I did have a few good events last week, the only one I planed was a road trip with my adult daughter. We had a great time. This week I’m going to arrange a night out with a few friends and a cheap date night with my wife. I’m also going to find someone to ride with this weekend. Sex: Twice, initiated five time…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/06/25 03:17 PM
1

OYS #9 49yo 5’9” 164lb. Married for 20+, 3 kids. My mission is to serve others by using my passion for learning and building to solve problems. I lead with integrity, friendliness, and trust, impacting as many lives as I can in ways that matter. Action plan: To be able to do 8 pull-ups and bench my own weight. Go 30 days without: DEERing, Failing fitness tests, Losing my frame or using overt dread Physical: Bench press: 11x115. Lat pulldown: 12x120. Leg press 12x355. Romanian deadlift 4x205. 3-p…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/06/25 03:15 PM
1

OYS #8 49yo 5’9” 165lb. Married for 20+, 3 kids. My mission is to serve others by using my passion for learning and building to solve problems. I lead with integrity, friendliness, and trust, impacting as many lives as I can in ways that matter. Action plan: To be able to do 8 pull-ups and bench my own weight. Go 30 days without: DEERing, Failing fitness tests, Losing my frame or using overt dread Physical: Bench press: 11x115. Lat pulldown: 12x120. Leg press 10x355. Romanian deadlift 4x205. 3-p…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/06/25 03:05 PM
10

It is not heartless to ensure your needs are met and not being taken advantage of. She has your balls, you need to take them back. High value attractive men don’t get pissy when they don’t get laid. They don’t resent bitches for taking advantage of them (they don’t tolerate such behavior at all). She doesn’t respect you.
/r/askMRP24/06/25 11:44 AM
1

Sex: 2-3, both sessions were excellent. Went into the week feeling like I didn’t care if I ever f her again. I went along most the week giving her nothing left to do but fuck me. On Thursday night I was walking out the door to get a beer with a buddy and told her where I was going, she confronted me, demanding to know what was wrong. I replied “nothing” and she pushed, I replied over and over again with either “I’m not having this conversation” or “I’ve got nothing to say.” Got called everything…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/06/25 04:05 PM
1

OYS #7 49yo 5’9” 160lb. Married for 20+, 3 kids. I’m here to identify reasons I’m unattractive and address them Action plan: To be able to do 8 pull-ups and bench my own weight. Go 30 days without: DEERing, Failing fitness tests, Losing my frame or using overt dread Physical:Bench press: 10x115. Lat pulldown: 12x120. Leg press 10x335. Romanian deadlift 10x185. 3-pull ups Only worked out four days this week, had to do a few airport runs early AM on Friday that got me out of my routine. Wasn’t abl…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/06/25 04:01 PM
1

Always a good read, thanks. That is definitely what I'm currently doing now. When I said I need to decide what I want, I meant long term. I'm not going to give my gifts to some bitch who doesn't want them.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/06/25 02:05 PM
1

Yes. I’m doing the work. Everything that gets to be in my life needs to help me achieve my goals. Otherwise I don’t have time for it.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/06/25 12:54 AM
1

How the fuck do you define a LTR I use LTR instead of wife sometimes when I type. I see now how that can be confusing. solo some shit and figure your world out. What do you mean by this? The only part of my world that I feel like I don't have a handle on is the one that involves intimacy. I don't share my life mission, purpose, etc because I share as little personal information as possible to avoid being doxed.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/06/25 11:05 PM
1

The relationship is her job. Not yours. That is a different way of looking at this. You are 100% right, my job is just to fix myself. A better question is am I letting her get in my way.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/06/25 10:34 PM
1

OYS #6 49yo 5’9” 160lb. Married for 20+, 3 kids. I’m here to identify reasons I’m unattractive and address them Action plan: To be able to do 8 pull-ups and bench my own weight. Go 30 days without: DEERing, Failing fitness tests, Losing my frame or using overt dread Physical: Bench press: 10x115. Lat pulldown: 12x120. Leg press 10x335. Romanian deadlift 10x185. 3-pull ups Only lifted twice this week, was sick in bed for four days. Was able to increase my bench by one rep. Replaced one set of lat…
/r/MarriedRedPill03/06/25 03:56 PM
1

What makes you think you can put gloves on now and get in the ring like a heterosexual man? I came here to admit I lost this time. I let myself respond emotionally to what I felt was a personal attack. I get better by facing the test again. I believe I can put gloves on now because I have entered the ring in the past and have not lost my frame.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/25 03:56 PM
1

Absolutely, a man who can't keep his word to himself is gay. There is still value in places like this OYS weekly thread where other men hold you accountable. For me, most of the benefit is taking the time to write the post, the reflection this causes helps. But knowing there are guys out there like you that will take the time to read what I wrote and help guide me is almost as powerful.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/25 03:44 PM
1

If you truly believe it's a waste of time, own it. Going through the motions for a cause you don't believe in is both stupid and weak. I see what you mean, but I don't truly believe it's a waste of time. You're trapped in cycle of your own making. I accept that I created this cycle. I blame myself for her response. You are absolutely right that our relationship is a reflection on me. How do I break the cycle?
/r/MarriedRedPill29/05/25 03:40 PM
1

That is basically my question. How will I know when I’m ready? I took my failure hard, but then doubled down since I didn’t have a streak to lose.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/05/25 08:53 PM
1

That is helpful. What about times that seem like a good time to practice fogging, AM & AA? I see her as my sparing partner, don't I have to throw punches to learn?
/r/MarriedRedPill27/05/25 07:50 PM
1

Unfortunately reading alone isn't enough to change behavior. I have to put it into practice. I find STFU particularly difficult. I am getting better, but obviously not where I need to be. Appreciate you holding me accountable.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/05/25 04:35 PM
1

Thanks for taking the time to hold me accountable. Learned some hard lessons this week. I read the links you shared.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/05/25 04:25 PM
0

OYS #5 49yo 5’9” 162lb. Married for 20+, 3 kids. I’m here to identify reasons I’m unattractive and address them Action plan: To be able to do 8 pull-ups and bench my own weight. Go 30 days without: DEERing, Failing fitness tests, Losing my frame or using overt dread Physical: Bench press: 9x115. Lat pulldown: 12x120. Leg press 10x335. Romanian deadlift 10x185. Lifted 6 days, added a quick 10min arm workout on day 6th to address weak area (curls and tri extensions, spaced a day apart from compoun…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/05/25 03:24 PM
1

How many days are you going to lift before your next OYS? Post that now, then report back next week to show you can keep a commitment to yourself.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/05/25 08:45 PM
0

Sounds like Rambo and beta-revenge behavior. Who's frame were you in? You might be right. I was definitely in the Rambo phase for a while and this definitely feels different. My intention is to be Rocky, preparing for my fight at the end by working my MAP. I was in my frame. I flirt with every girl now, it's fun. Sometimes it's just changing my tone and the way I look at them.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/05/25 02:24 PM
2

There are lots of internet people like you who are gracious with their time and help the rest of us monkeys improve at our pursuits.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/05/25 09:11 PM
2

Lift! Decide right now when you'll go and for how long each day. Then just do it. If you can't commit to the most important step and then actually do it. Why even post here?
/r/MarriedRedPill20/05/25 04:31 PM
1

OYS #4 49yo 5’9” 161lb. Married for 20+, 3 kids. I’m here to identify reasons I’m unattractive and address them Action plan: To be able to do 8 pull-ups and bench my own weight. Go 30 days without: DEERing, Failing fitness tests, Losing my frame or using overt dread Physical: Bench press: 9x115. Lat pulldown: 10x120. Leg press 12x325. Romanian deadlift 12x135. Great week progressing, added creatine to my supplements, gained 1lb of weight (since I’ve been eating whenever I’m hungry). Read: WISNIF…
/r/MarriedRedPill20/05/25 03:46 PM
1

Facts
/r/MarriedRedPill13/05/25 07:57 PM
1

OYS #3 49yo 5’9” 160lb. Married for 20+, 3 kids. I’m here to identify reasons I’m unattractive and address them Action plan: To be able to do 8 pull-ups and bench my own weight. Go 30 days without: DEERing, Failing fitness tests, Losing my frame or using overt dread. Physical: Shoulder press machine: 10x100. Bench press: 9x105. Lat pulldown: 6x130. Leg press 12x315. Added in Romanian deadlift 19x95. Stalled two weeks in a row in shoulder press machine (I did go up in DB shoulder press, which is …
/r/MarriedRedPill13/05/25 04:35 PM
1

i can guarantee you're going to be banned for rule 9 or rule 10. I understand better where the boundary is now, thank you. if you already know you're going to fire her, why are you waiting? I'm focused on myself, not her. My interpretation of Mindful Action Plan was to address all the red areas before moving on to phase 2.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/05/25 04:32 PM
1

The whole continually looking back thing is the problem. Agreed. I look back to see if she follows because I don't think she'll follow no matter what I do. I hope I'm wrong. I'll continue working on my MAP until I've achieved my goals. I'll remember your point about how pointless it is to look back though. it is your intolerance and rejection or her shit attitude that moves the needle. Her attitude is that it is unreasonable for me to expect to be desired, based on our "season" of life. I will f…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/05/25 02:46 PM
1

There's a covert contract there. You may be right. I didn't think of that before you said it. I went back and tried to find where I read the quote, but I couldn't, which means I probably didn't write it down accurately. It is true that I hope she follows, that isn't going to stop me from going where I'm going.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/05/25 02:03 AM
1

You should be here to make yourself and your world better. Agreed.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/05/25 07:14 PM
1

Thanks for the feedback. I’ll reconsider my goal. Any specific direction is appreciated. Thank you for taking the time to read everything else.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/05/25 06:48 PM
4

I have a very strong inner critic Resolve to stop being critical all together. Literally catch yourself anytime you have a critical thought about yourself or anyone else. What you do to yourself, you'll do to others. Nothing good can come of these negative thoughts, never tolerate it. I know because I was that guy for a long time, had something negative to say about everyone and everything. It took a long time, but I was able to change.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/05/25 03:37 PM
2

I'm hoping this will make me less reactive to things that stress me out. There are lot of different ways to meditate. The biggest benefit for me is to meditate on my own thoughts, it helps me realize how fast the thoughts come and go. It also helps me recognize feelings. These two things together give me space during stressful moments. The space to choose my response. And the space between stimulus and response, allows me to choose who I am going to be.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/05/25 03:29 PM
2

OYS #2 Goal: Be in a long term relationship with a woman who is attracted to me. Action plan: To be able to do 8 pull-ups and bench my own weight. Go 30 days without: DEERing, Failing fitness tests, Losing my frame or using overt dread Physical: Shoulder DB press (machine): 10x100. Bench press: 9x105. Lat pulldown: 11x120. Leg press 11x305. Stalled this week in the compounds lifts, but progressed in other exercises — I assume because I worked in the yard on my two rest days, 20 hours moving rock…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/05/25 03:25 PM
1

OYS #1 49yo 5’9” 162lb. M20+years, 3 kids Goal: Be in a marriage with a woman who is attracted to me. Action plan: To be able to do 8 pull-ups and bench my own weight Go 30 days without: DEERing, Failing fitness tests, Losing my frame or using overt dread Physical: Shoulder DB press (machine): 10x100. Bench press: 10x105. Lat pulldown: 6x120. Leg press 11x305. Second week of new full-body routine, lifting five days /wk, progressed in either reps or weight on every exercise. This week I’m going t…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/04/25 06:43 PM
2

This is a joke right?
/r/askMRP25/04/25 01:01 PM
5

Just think I would have had more success initiating the follow up. In other words, it can work, just not as often.
/r/seduction22/04/25 09:28 PM
2

I've done it, and it has worked (she called and I closed). Not sure it's the best approach, though.
/r/seduction22/04/25 08:52 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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