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Oli_love90 Archive

View 0 posts and 1,847 comments by Oli_love90 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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6

“When men want to go Dutch on dates, the simple practical way is to pay on the first date, then demand she pay on the second, and they alternate”
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/26 05:42 AM
11

Instead of just communicating, you can just come in with a whole strategy on how to “demand” payment next time. Sounds much better than your suggestion /s.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 11:05 PM
–

As you said, it could be both because this is a purely personal question. I don’t think most men are good, but only so if you’re worthy in their eyes (but that’s my POV solely based on my own experiences). There’s no poll out for a definitive answer, so maybe this perception doesn’t matter?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 10:11 PM
–

Fr, anything we do, anyway we dress, speak, act, do or don’t do, it’s always something. Sheesh.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 05:09 AM
–

The majority of humans will have children. This will never change. You do not need to express this take when the majority already agree with you. To keep trying to convince the very small minority - including people who are involuntarily single and infertile - that their lives are unfulfilled is a weird exercise. It’s so exhausting to hear this take. People who choose not to be mothers or go with the conventional family unit are told in many different ways how unimportant they are. That’s why th…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 05:07 AM
6

I agree and it’s always been weird to me that it’s implied EVERYONE will be a parent. In the history of the world everyone did not have kids so why the pressure now to do the impossible?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 05:27 PM
9

I think you’re too tuned into the “feel good” single women discourse. Single women who are unable to secure the relationship they want (not voluntarily single) turn inward. “What am I doing wrong?” “Am I really Ugly?” “Where do I go to meet men?”. They will rarely think they’re “too good” for guys. I feel like men talk as if women are handed a binder of men who actually like them and we flip through it with revulsion. We do not know, nor have met our actual alternatives. We are not insta rejecti…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 05:25 PM
3

It’s actually startling how men here think most women exist.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 05:13 PM
–

How is this related to the examples I stated? Is it not disheartening to hear men express disgust in a woman’s physical form over and over again and then have to gleefully try to date?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 04:16 PM
1

Regarding pretty privilege, I agree. There are so many guys on dating apps that lay back while women do the heavy lifting of conversation. Why do you think you’re such a beautiful catch that you have to do 0 work to talk to another person?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 03:57 PM
1

If you’re dating with the intention of a relationship, it’s weird to me that men would not want to Atleast slim the profile.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 03:55 PM
–

Men consistently express disgust towards women. If you have body hair, if you have cellulite or any fat, they’re disgusted by the variation in vaginas. If you’re an ugly women it’s visible disgust when interacting. Periods are topics on constant ire. Saggy boobs. Natural aging is often considered disgusting. If you’ve slept with too many men in their opinion you’re disgusting. I know you can only speak from your perspective but men absolutely hold a mild disgust towards women, but somehow ya’ll …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 03:47 PM
6

Same! I was thinking the same thing reading this too, lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 05:30 AM
4

I know MY answer, but that’s not the universal answer. It’s not some grand scheme amongst women.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 03:12 AM
15

That’s such an odd question. Because something is true for some doesn’t make it true for all. So why does it matter?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 08:28 PM
10

No, there’s an answer from SOME women. That means jack shit.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 08:15 PM
42

Lol, are we all really still stuck in this discourse? If you think women are boring bums that bring nothing, you do not have to date. Dating is not mandatory. This question is null and void because as humans with various wants and likes there will never be a satisfying answer. All this question does is allow for men or women to argue personal preferences. Okay? Maybe the question you ask yourself if what qualities am I looking for? Then vet from there.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 08:10 PM
6

Can’t that be argued with browsing the internet? Get off your phone! Go learn a skill! 😄 It takes so little to comment and engage, most people spend a negligible amount of time here and interact here just as much as they do with any subreddit they’re in. It’s ridiculous to look down on and also assume people aren’t actually living lives outside of this because you see engagement in the sub. I hope you find somewhere more helpful to be OP.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 04:48 PM
-1

It’s not an ideology, it’s just a way to exist. A few women endorsing its benefits doesn’t mean that majority of women who live this way consider it a doctrine to live by. Throughout human history there’s been a negligible cohort of women who remained single and childfree. It’ll never replace the nuclear family structure.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 10:03 PM
13

The villanization and weirdo allegations towards people who choose to remain single/childfree is honestly disheartening. You’re looked at so negatively, accused of living this way out of spite or pitied all for simply existing. Personally I hope that single and childless men never get the hate that single childless women do. I hope we can just exist happily on the fringes with little scrutiny.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 05:56 PM
3

I notice the same thing here too. The issue described has some validity then they veer into some version of “…and this is why women are completely to blame dooming us men to pure suffering at their hands”.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 05:35 PM
–

It’s so odd how this situation activated red pill lol. He spoke to her crazy, actively hindered her healing after her stroke, is extremely domineering. Now we’re supposed to be surprised she left when her kids were grown, she’s financially set, and healthy enough? How much should women endure from a partner before it’s okay to give up on a relationship? Because guys seem to think if it’s not physical abuse then she has no excuse. This is not a situation that proves that women don’t truly love me…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 02:34 AM
13

Fr, apparently these guys are EVERYWHERE patrolling for average women to take advantage of. So where are they??
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 08:27 PM
12

Oh dear, I always find that ya’ll have a general idea that could be workable and they hard left turn into “women bad” as your conclusions. The average woman is not landing chad for casual or serious relationships. I don’t know why you all seem to be convinced this is a thing. Similar to hot women, hot men by and large ignore or step over us to get to the hot ones. They’re not desperately hooking up with women they find ugly. I don’t know why you all will not let go of the idea that most women an…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 08:23 PM
7

I’m lost as to why you think I’d call out a random women rather than ignore her comment or downvote. Do you call out every person on the internet you disagree with?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 06:51 PM
8

The issue isn’t gendered though - Men will tell women to choose better or scold them for not instantly identifying red flags. If a woman is single it’s because she’s too picky, she can’t keep a man. My point is that in the game of dating this is a common thing used to make the victim of the action look stupid for simply trusting someone authentically likes them.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 06:49 PM
2

I’ll check it out because as you can see, I am not being very kind to myself.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 01:26 AM
12

Makes sense to me. A lot of convo regarding dating doesn’t include the forever single gals. The “just got out of a relationship so they’re taking a break” are the loudest voices. The truly single women who desire partnership are rarely commiserating and sharing memes online. They feel like something is wrong with them so issues with the dating scene are secondary. I know for me, I felt socially anxious, kinda ugly then eventually too old. I’m not happy about it but I’m likely to never attempt da…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/26 08:13 AM
10

OP, I’m sorry but this is a RIDICULOUS statement.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 04:32 PM
17

As usual, these scenarios are missing context and details. How is nerdy guy approaching? What’s the vibe of the place? How old is everyone? Why does nerdy guy present a threat in this case? Is he walking up to her in an alleyway? To answer the main question, women dislike male attention for MANY reasons. This is one of those “based on my personal experience” questions. It could range from my own self esteem issues, a bad day, weird approach from the man, taken, not wanting to be oogled, bad envi…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 01:54 AM
10

Ya’ll are aware average men are also capable of being bad partners? Why is it always six ft bad boy or wholesome good guy?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 04:13 AM
26

Consistent clubbing? Hyper sexualization? Interesting. What other factors do you think entail women’s self empowerment?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 04:11 AM
39

Exactly, painting paw paw as this lovelorn old fool who just wanted true love is so odd. Who’s to say he loved her either??
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 08:44 PM
1

I hear that all the time [insert extreme case found someone!] yet I’ve been single for 10 years. It’s possible that some women don’t have options because they’re unremarkable and easy to ignore.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 11:02 PM
2

I think it’s either attractive women get flooded with guys who are not a match or just seeking casual because they’re hot and therefore write off the experience as no good men. Whereas unattractive or old women get matches who aren’t excited to match with them so they also feel like there’s no good men on there for them either.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 09:10 PM
6

My personal theory is that there are women who have similar complaints (barely any likes, conversations not progressing into into dates) but they’re older or undesirable in someway so their experiences are removed from the conversation. But I really think that it’s rare to find a good match for both men and women on the apps. If you do, it’s sheer luck.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 08:56 PM
7

Personally yes (I’m aware it’s not normal or okay). I feel that as humans we try way too hard and I prefer stagnant over this constant self improvement we strive for throughout our lifetime.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 03:26 PM
7

I’m attracted to that. But the issue is that these men are likely indoors, not seeking anything - similar to me or they met their partner in high school or something when you didn’t have to be an exciting human to date. Tbh it’s frustrating that people are constantly doing too much, I’m truly okay with a boring life. If that was the norm, then I still don’t think more men would be partnered up. There’s a lot of factors outside of personality that’s stopping people from coupling up.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 01:11 PM
1

Unfortunately, a content life doesn’t get much engagement online. Think of anything positive - new job, love my partner so much, something genuinely exciting - few comments. Conflict, confusion, fucked up stories get the feedback because it’s exciting. No one is coming to the internet to talk about their happy relationship, they don’t need to be the opposing voice to the negativity. So all that’s left are the wild tales, the gender wars, the people seeking community in their negative feelings be…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 07:38 AM
6

I think this is the only answer that makes sense here. Rates of “forever single” adults have not increased substantially. People are still partnering up at the same rate.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 06:09 PM
7

I think your general belief is bordering on incorrect. Most women do not want to cycle through endless men and have sex freely all the time. The amount of experience women have both sexually an relationship-wise is being vastly overestimated. Majority of women date a few people before they finally find their person. Some like FWB and casual arrangements - but not dozens of men. This hoe phase you all seem to think most women have isn’t a thing. You are basing your thoughts on how you think women…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 03:52 AM
2

Why do you think they are? I feel the same just curious of a guys perspective.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 07:47 PM
–

I’d be SO nervous if my entire financial life was basically at the whim of someone else.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 01:51 AM
–

I think society would proceed as is. Lol. Unless the capitalist overlords somehow decide to make life affordable on one income, then it wouldn’t matter how “happy and healthy” citizens are.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 01:15 AM
1

You all really over estimate how much attention all women have access to. - Some women CANNOT AT ALL get male attention easily. They would likely turn to ai bfs. - Some women have been hurt physically or emotionally by men, they would like turn to ai bfs. - Some women are older and isolated, they would likely turn to ai bfs. You find it bizarre and reach the odd conclusion that the “male body is unappealing” because you leap over the truth to continue the narrative that all women can easily find…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 11:50 PM
3

Exactly and all these guys here agreeing as if this is okay is honestly concerning.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 07:00 PM
5

Why do ya’ll always jump to the extreme here? It’s so weird. Why would your mind jump to 30 partners? “ I tried that sex act with one ex, I didn’t like it, I don’t want to do it again”. Is this not logical to you?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 06:56 PM
6

Placing “taking women out to eat” on the same level as “get naked and have sex” here is so weird to me. They’re not comparable experiences.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 06:45 PM
9

I get what you’re saying. I guess I personally find it weird because if I’m down bad, I just don’t see why I would point and laugh at someone else. To celebrate that we’re both miserable, sad, whatever is a level of mean I don’t have in me. But that’s just me.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 04:49 AM
19

Ah of course you assume I’m in my feelings, lol. I swear, guys here cannot talk to a woman without accusing her of being hysterical. I’m telling you in plain words that it’s already happening. You just want people to treat this women more cruelly to make yourself feel better.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 03:49 AM
25

It’s not a reach though. The reason you made this post was purely to be cruel. This is not new information for both perpetually single women nor the men who gleefully make fun of them so what’s the point? You say they should be recognized as losers, okay what does that look like? More posts like this? It’s okay to admit you get excited that women get their “deserved punishment” for not existing in the way you want them to.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 03:34 AM
1

These are a lot of the same factors that keep men single too.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 03:31 AM
4

Women who don’t go out much. Dont post on social or do the apps. Don’t have many friends. Shy, awkward, mentally unstable. There’s many ways in which you don’t have options.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 03:23 AM
30

It’s so interesting to read these types of rants. Women who end up single when they do not want to be already know. Everybody reinforces how much of a failure they are. They already know something is off. Just because you all haven’t gotten around to making fun of them yet doesn’t mean they don’t know. But I firmly think it’s weird to have this much vitriol towards a pretty small portion of the population.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 03:16 AM
–

In my perspective no, I truly do not think everyone can be in a relationship. Does that mean I won’t self improve physically and mentally, of course not. But I don’t think anything will increase my chances. Especially as I get older.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 05:58 PM
10

Women don’t hate men en masse though, for every woman who says they don’t like a man, there’s like 20 women who are all about men. Luckily and unluckily we get to see everyone’s opinions. Some women simply do not like how men move in the world. That’s literally always been a thing, I guess ya’ll are just now discovering that? Did you think ALL women adored men before the internet? If a handful of women who express their disdain makes you want to hate all women then there’s truly nothing anyone c…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 05:49 PM
–

Maybe like a handful like 2-5 every once in a while. I only reject obvious red flags or empty profiles. I will engage with matches. Yep - I live in a big city, I’m always in social situations. I don’t get approached at all, no matter what though.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 05:40 PM
–

Oof, your tone is judgemental, lol. For me, it’s no one’s interested. I haven’t dated in years and it’s not because I wasn’t looking just no one’s interested. But it’s always been that way so it’s not a new issue. Lack of genuine interest, guys are obviously power swiping and not truly interested. So I end up futility carrying the convo with a man who’s not interested. Older, therefore less singles. I’m surrounded by couples and babies. Even if I could generate some interest there’s no one aroun…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 05:31 PM
–

It’s so bold to speak on women when you’re not one nor understand. I would never feel confident enough to speak on men like this lol. I think for the most part, you’re seeing women who actually do struggle talking about their dating issues. So while other women may not have issues such as attracting people, genuine interest, no sexual attention, being invisible - you’re still hearing the truth. It’s so weird how the guys here struggle to believe that there’s a subset of women who genuinely have …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 04:32 PM
6

Women are not celebrated for being single, especially past a certain age. It’s pity, it’s questions, it’s “post wall” “spinster” “cat lady”. If you don’t have kids, you’re deemed bitter and accused of hating kids. No, we’re not celebrated. It’s wild to me that you think so. Since coupling is default, when anyone is single it’s always questioned. No matter who you are people will always be a little uncomfortable because you’re single.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 05:54 PM
1

Nah, STDs, pregnancy, yeast infections,BV are still on the table. A stable FWB would be ideal though.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/26 02:01 PM
1

Whose complaining? Im stating the fact that nothing is effortless.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 11:27 PM
2

It’s one sided when you’re choosing uninterested people. To use the friend analogy - when you tried to befriend to popular kid they either ignored you or made you jump through hoops for their approval. It’s cruel but that’s how dating is working now. A bunch of guys are desperately pursing women who don’t like them and wondering why it feels one sided.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 11:26 PM
1

Just because it’s a common tactic for ya’ll to target ugly women with false flattery doesn’t make it’s a welcome thing for us. That probably works because they think you’re interested - what a success to be duped by a man who doesn’t like you! Great win! You seem to want to use your lived experience to question mine and speak for the women you know. I’m glad you’re confident in your delusion. Also, no need to be rude. Calm down love.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 07:15 PM
2

How do you know women believe they’re the prize? You can’t use your own biases as proof.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 06:46 PM
6

“Idk how many get in this sub and deny it or try to downplay it…” So that means you don’t want anyone to debate your dubious view then? You want to live in “all women’s intentions are bad and it’s true because I want it to be!” land.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 06:42 PM
1

I’m undesirable and no, I wouldn’t appreciate that approach at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 05:58 PM
0

Yuck. Ya’ll are exhausting.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 05:57 PM
1

It’s so weird to me because all of human connection is effort. To keep friends. To get along with coworkers. To talk to neighbors. To maintain family connections. This is all effort. Why would getting the attention of a stranger in order to date or have sex with them be effortless?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 05:54 PM
2

Exactly, this post just shows how there’s a default view of women here that’s VERY negative.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 05:48 PM
–

Well here, any woman who they don’t find attractive NEEDS to be treated like shit. It’s a core staple of the really great guys here.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 12:51 PM
–

“They cared when those men started saying things about women that made people uncomfortable” Yes, this makes sense though? For example, If femcels had strategies on how to terrorize men, theories on men’s biology, techniques on how to squeeze money out of men, loud talking heads advocating for harming men mentally and physically, weird pseudo science and other cruel things outside of self improvement, there would be similar conversation. When fringe groups remain quiet and commiserate amongst th…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 11:17 PM
-1

Guys here are so stuck on the conclusion “women=bad” that you contort everything to squeeze into the narrative. The truth is dating is harder because of both men and women, people ignore or can’t find the perfect options for them, humans treat others badly in dating no matter who they are, good men and women don’t always put themselves out there or have friends to hook them up so dating is harder. There has to be some accountability on your end instead of blaming dating woes solely on women’s “p…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/26 05:41 PM
6

I don’t think it’s a failure to understand it’s that they don’t care. They don’t have to birth children, undergo abortions, suffer the side effects of the pill, go through the paid of iud, feel the effects of yeast infections or BV, the subtle pain of rough sex, tearing, etc. so ofc to them it’s like if I was a woman I’d sleep around everywhere because they just don’t care even though women have been telling them about these side effects.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/26 06:52 PM
24

What’s your algorithm looking like? I’m so curious because I don’t see these women proclaiming their worth and demanding from men en masse like this. I’m apt to believe it’s not “a lot of women”. Just like I can’t use this sub as evidence that men ain’t shit I don’t see why your tailored feed can be used to make this point valid. Did you poll real women? Did you go to subs and interact with posts from various women? Then the idea that women are delusional is severely misinformed and intertwined …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/26 04:12 PM
3

What being bombarded with incompatible matches who swipe right on anything tells the average women is that now she has to dig through piles of guys who don’t like her at all. Now she’s left with half assed intro messages, disrespectfully sexual messages and lazy conversation. If a hot man swipes right on me, I’m aware it’s total bullshit. Why would that make her feel like she has access to guys out of her league? Guys weirdly think that matches are flattering even though plenty of women tell the…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/26 01:29 AM
6

I think this type of mis understanding of women that’s super annoying to me. Guys here use some odd form of logic to “analyze” women then act confused or defensive when they’re told this is not how women think at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/26 04:55 PM
6

Guys aren’t noticing anything, they’re intentionally putting on blinders. Average women don’t have access to those men, average women are plain and often ignored. It’s interesting how rp preaches so much yet misunderstands women totally.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/26 04:49 PM
3

Most women completely understand that they will have a very hard time dating in their 30s/40s. Idk why guys here seem to think women are completely divorced from reality. Where do you see women gleefully talking about how awesome it is to date as you get older??
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 04:19 PM
35

The women who is on camera ranting about guys with abs and good paying jobs isn’t the average woman. So, you seem to have no idea what the average women’s perception is or even what the average woman looks like.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/26 04:04 PM
63

I’ve seen this shy girl lament online and men do not at all reacting kindly. They make fun of her, ask her about the men she must have rejected, if she’s older they make fun of her age, lord forbid she’s not super attractive and the comments are brutal. It’s disingenuous to paint men as altruistic and women as not with this example.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/26 08:39 AM
9

Exactly, I’ll never understand the obsession with single women (whether by choice or not) you’re not going to date them so why hyper analyze their choices?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/26 06:54 PM
8

Absolutely not hurt nor do I think it’s an inherently wrong reaction from guys. Dating and dealing with others can often be disheartening and breed disillusionment. Not every can keep trying, failing and remain chipper and hopeful. But I don’t see women noting intimidation in this case, more often they’re either like “okay don’t date” or if it’s followed by inflammatory rhetoric you’ll get very different responses.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 03:00 PM
25

I know! Like okay, women over [insert whatever age you think is old] still exist. Tf do you want us to do with this information? Why do you keep telling us?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 04:16 AM
1

Throughout history there has been small pockets of women who are forever alone, but no one paid them any mind. Everyone is more online and way more comfortable posting online. I don’t think there’s a rise of these types of women and more that they make themselves more visible to everyone else.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/26 06:25 PM
–

I agree here. As a below average women you get all these “false matches” that obviously don’t like your or are out of your league. You filter through those guys then have some half assed conversations and wonder how to filter through matches that shouldn’t have been there in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 02:51 PM
–

You’re operating in semantics and it’s obviously not going anywhere. You’re totally correct. Everything you’ve said is valid.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 11:56 AM
–

I’d also love to understand where this prevailing thought is that most women are engaged in or even want a FWB situation.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 11:47 AM
–

“Because she doesn’t like him” in response to deeply personal reasons paints her as both bad and wrong. Which are both pillars of determining morality. While deeming women with low self esteem as poor choices certainly falls deeply into moral judgement.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 11:44 AM
–

Take accountability friend.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 11:30 AM
–

They absolutely do though.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 11:29 AM
–

Your specific situations don’t really cancel out a single thing I’ve said. If anything they exhibit how little you all know and understand women and how much jealousy you feel for men who are better at courting than you.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 11:27 AM
–

It must be sad to paint women as the villains in your dating story.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 11:25 AM
–

This is so incorrect, I truly hope most guys disregard it. As usual here, anything a woman does is always perceived as a slight to men rather than anything else. Maybe she doesn’t want to rush into something as personal as sex. Maybe she has low self esteem. Maybe she’s just not that type of passionate. Maybe a million different things you decided to ignore because you have a flippant attitude regarding physical intimacy. It’s really like you all see a couple of movie where a woman is ripping hi…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 11:15 AM
–

As I was reading, I was like what about literally every single other sex act? Oral (giving and receiving) has never been my favorite, there’s no deeper reason it’s just (as you said) not my cup of tea.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 03:35 PM
–

Wouldn’t the birth rate increase in those other countries? Who’s to say these grateful wives will want to move to the U.S.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 09:46 PM
45

Of course not. It’s takes a lot of guts to talk to a stranger and even more so to hit on them. What I need guys to realize is that some people are simply mean. It’s not about you earnestly hitting on them or not meeting their attractive threshold. Some people are jerks and it’s unfortunate you interacted with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 01:05 AM
1

I know you don’t technically mean all women but there is a small handful that is very unsuccessful so they can atleast somewhat relate to dating feeling demoralizing.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/26 07:18 AM
14

Honestly, every woman wants to hear the magic words “eh, you’ll do”.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/26 01:06 AM
8

I mainly hate that men will trash older women because they prefer younger women. They’ll use cruel language, needlessly compare, keep repeating how much hotter 20 yr olds are, tell you you’re bitter and jealous, tell you after 30 you’re unwanted - everything to make you feel like you are a mistake for aging. Then when there’s all different types of people expressing discomfort for age gaps they’ll immediately blame those pesky nasty older women and hypothesize nonsense about them.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/26 12:55 AM
6

No one deserves a human. It’s not great to think that you’ll get a partner by being a good human. That seems “fair” but it’s unrealistic and that’s not how life works.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 08:36 PM
1

Exactly, that’s why I don’t even bother talking to friends about dating. When people find someone to be with in h.s or college they don’t get how demoralizing dating is
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 04:50 PM
1

Makes total sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 12:19 AM
5

Okay, so I’ve acknowledged how miserable dating is. Now one woman is aware but that doesn’t change anything really nor will it make others realize or OP feel better. This is what I meant in my comment.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 08:09 PM
3

I did show empathy, just not the sickly sweet way you seem to want. Our personalities are different maybe you need a kinder touch and I hope you find that in someone else.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 05:25 PM
6

I’m waiting for OP to engage and he hasn’t. If he does then I can understand if he’s looking for empathy in the form of relating, empathy in the form of “sorry to hear that” or none that an internet stranger can offer.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 04:20 PM
2

Exactly, I don’t even go to my friends about my dating woes because I know how I’ll come across after complaining 100x. We all would love endless fountains of empathy but we have to realize other people are not there to absorb your negative energy over and over again.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 02:33 PM
4

Exactly, Empathy is delivered in the form of “here’s some advice” which they don’t want. “that sucks, help me understand” which they don’t want. “I’m in a similar boat! Let’s talk!” which they really don’t want.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 02:18 PM
4

They keep doing it because everyone is different and you’re on the internet with different ideas doe that negate other takes on dating? I hear your points but I feel that guys can never accept that some women also struggle in dating and FEEL similar to them is a root cause of why we can’t see eye to eye on empathy. We’re met with “but we’re trying harder! You’ll never get it!” Instead of “okay, we’re both struggling in some way and that’s hard”
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 02:11 PM
28

When women actually talk to each other, not some empowering online video, some story about how much men suck, not bullshit feel good nonsense - just talking to each other like human beings we get down to what we are doing wrong too. You are not privy because that’s a vulnerable conversation between women. Outside of everything you said. OP is noting that he is struggling to even date. You are extrapolating a little too far into full relationship dynamics. I’m at the first simple step - find a hu…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 05:17 AM
16

Nope, we’re told our issues don’t exist or they’re not as bad as men’s therefore totally dismissing them.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 03:21 AM
67

When you talk to these women what is your ideal response? When I lament to my friends about my dating woes they say something close to “That sucks, I’m sorry”. Generally, when people complain about being undateable that’s the best response you’ll get. How much emotional depth are you expecting? Do you want them to leap into action and make something happen for you? They won’t. I feel like you’re looking for a level of sympathy that doesn’t really exist. Maybe that’s why you feel so let down in g…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 03:16 AM
3

Omg, you’re so right. Women caused all your insecurities. Women are the reason you feel bad.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 09:06 PM
2

Insecurities could be internal, or triggered by the people you hand around with or the content you ingest.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 07:21 PM
6

Because people use your insecurities against you. I remember being called four eyes and feeling bad even though wearing glasses isn’t even bad. Also, what’s the context? Were the insults used in a heated conversation? Were they used after the other party was insulted?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 04:51 PM
-1

But there are women who don’t care, there are women who are also virgins, there are women who don’t use sexuality as an insult. I’m not going to deny that it may be harder to find but they do exist.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 04:48 PM
0

Okay, well then I’m not “they”. The “some” may feel the way I do, which is none of the above.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 04:42 PM
14

Why would a woman care about how much casual sex you’ve had before them? That’s so odd to me. Edit to add: casual since everyone is vehemently telling me women care.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 04:07 PM
5

I don’t know if you’re responding to me, but I was saying that there are women who exist who are struggling.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 12:07 AM
3

No more than women, but it may be true that humans in general may.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 12:05 AM
7

Me too! I’m tired of the erasure!
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/26 07:17 PM
7

Exactly, and yet they act altruistic as if they’re so open and kind to all types of women. Idk why men cannot just admit they’re picky too.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/26 07:15 PM
7

It’s happens, you guys just won’t acknowledge women’s experience because you believe it doesn’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/26 07:09 PM
11

Exactly, they insist that men will “accept anything! We’re so not picky!” Yet wont acknowledge when women say that’s not true. I’ve shared my experience too and gotten the same “you must be so ugly lolz” response. Lack of accountability, really.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/26 07:08 PM
–

His point was so dumb, he deleted his whole account, lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/26 06:14 PM
–

The fact that the responses to you are jumping over hoops and deeply invested in “whataboutism” just shows to me that guys here truly think porn is 100% okay, which is sad.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/26 06:08 PM
–

I wish I could upvote you a hundred times. The pervasive myth here that all women are sleeping around with chads stains almost every single point trying to be made.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/26 06:05 PM
–

Not only is this an absurd, it doesn’t even work in comparison. The complaint about porn, which is widely available to everyone is that the act of sex is unrealistic. Sex in porn is choreographed, unrealistic and often painful. Pleasure and closeness is not the goal and limits are pushed for a better scene. Porn has given tons of people very bad perceptions of what actual sex is like. It has nothing to do with women’s attractiveness. Although the fact that you think that’s the main issue speaks …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/26 06:02 PM
2

I don’t explicitly say “I’m paying” but I do that move to pay thing. It would be nice to be paid for and I greatly appreciate it, but I get that’s not how every man dates. I will say that sometimes I think when guys pay they’re more interested but idk. If they offer to pay, I thank them and accept. I’ve never offered to pay for a first date but for 2nd/3rd I may cover them. If it’s a lowkey thing like coffee, I would absolutely cover it. And I like gifting so I’m okay paying for things for peopl…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/26 05:18 PM
7

I DO NOT think it’s weak and gross for a real man. It’s good that men want to please their partner like that. It’s purely personal, I get uncomfortable with anyone’s face near my crotch. So I can’t enjoy the moment.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/26 01:36 PM
16

In my experience it’s always offered but frankly I dislike it immensely. So I decline. Usually they’re bummed about it! Which is surprising to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/26 04:59 AM
6

Unfortunately I feel like there will never be a consensus on approaching so it is a risk and I don’t think men are overthinking it. Sure, you may run into a kind woman who is either interested or kindly rejects you but there’s women who are just nasty. Who wants to possibly subject themselves to that when they’re being vulnerable? But I agree in general with your thoughts. It’s absolutely in the “how” one approaches rather than just a blanket rule to not approach.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/26 04:55 AM
4

This is way too situation specific to have a definite answer. Have the women in John’s family gone through or witnessed a situation in which being a sahm turned out badly? Maybe they’re coming from a place of concern? It is scary to be financially reliant on another person. Is John’s family aware of his financial standing? If so, maybe they’re confused as to how the situation would work and feel sorry that they may be getting themselves into financial distress. Maybe John’s family knows in this …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/26 04:38 AM
5

I think it’s case by case. Personally, I wouldn’t consider it a red flag. It’s possible to be living a normal life but just not have many romantic opportunities. I just find people are so judgmental about how others live, so much so that we’re all so full of shame for simply trying to navigate our first times on earth.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/26 04:12 AM
2

Yeh like I’m bummed about it but by 30, either you’ve reached a level of acceptance (which can be negative or positive) or you’ve just exited a relationship. Either way you figure it out because you have to.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/26 01:08 AM
5

I stopped dating completely and don’t pursue men. So I already know I’m different from the norm, so take my opinion with a grain of salt. I agree with you, the main reasons I feel pressure is because I’m surrounded by couples. I’m one of the only single people I know. Everyone contains themselves into a relationship so it’s hard not to feel lonely. Financially it’s also hard to forgo relationships - life is designed for two. Third is just biology, I’m straight.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 04:32 AM
7

But how do you know this? How do you know they just struggled with dating? Mental health issues? Had a bad relationship that they’re healing from? How do you know they didn’t just get out of a relationship? Try to have kids and couldn’t? Sad because someone died? dealing with illness? So many things can make someone emotionally broken yet guys seem to only come up with she boss babed too close to the sun now she sad.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 04:11 AM
12

My guess is that guys like this ask questions that push your buttons until you’re in your feelings. “Married? No? Why not? Still single? NO kids? Don’t you like kids? Must be hard?”
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 03:48 AM
13

Yeah yeah, but the only real issues women could possibly be sad about is if they have no man and kids. Obviously! /s But really you make a wonderful point, so many things are happening personally, professionally, health wise, relationships, financially in your 30s you have to deal with and now guys are confused as to why we may not be happy outside of worrying about if they like us or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 03:43 AM
15

Guys here do this thing where they say mean shit but either backed up by dubious studies or coded language then when called out go “woooooow super emotional huh!!” The inability to accept accountability for words here is staggering.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 03:36 AM
21

I think maybe you feel as though you’re well intentioned but this very much has the exact energy of posts that make fun of single women over 35. Maybe youre not laughing at us but you are being patronizing.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 03:30 AM
27

So you are not dating women closer to your age for the exact reason women here think lol. This is another post of a pill guy laughing at us, it’s okay to admit and you know it’s not going to “get better”. We’ve heard it all, men treat us like crap then call us bitter, society shits on us if we don’t have kids, everyone keeps wondering why we’re not younger, then constantly telling us how much better younger women are - ofc you’re going to encounter some women who are beat down by the rhetoric. I…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 03:01 AM
–

There’s tons of acknowledgment that there’s a wide spectrum of attractiveness. You’re just not part of those conversations. The women who struggle with being approached already know they’re not attractive, a few tik toks of attractive young women saying they’re intimidating doesn’t change anything, like at all. Unattractive women already know. As a certified ugly who has struggled so much with dating I gave up, I don’t turn to the internet for advice neither do other women in my own situation. S…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 07:30 PM
6

It’s been wild to witness. Anytime guys here are asked to clarify points they have made here They’re like “huh what?! I personally don’t get it and apparently have never read any other posts here so you’re stupid and misandrist”. The lack of accountability here is exhausting.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 05:21 PM
–

Wow, you truly understand how western women think. We are devastated when men we are not interested in (nor they us) fly to different countries to date. I know I’ve lost so much sleep thinking about men like you, who unnecessarily compare random women via a detailed list based on an imaginary grievance instead of just quietly living your best life. Now that I know you prefer not to date western women, idk what I’m going to do with myself!
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/26 07:13 PM
–

Women don’t minimize the amount of women who end up alone to feed the strong independent narrative but Men are really having a lot of fun upholding that false narrative. Plenty of women share their regrets throughout the internet, with friends and family or keep it to themselves. We just don’t broadcast it to men because guys have consistently shown that all they’ll do towards single women is scrutinize and judge.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/26 03:55 PM
–

I always read it as they’re as happy as they can be in the moment. Those who want relationships but are single feel bad about it but they’re trying to still live a decent life. Those who don’t want a relationship are also trying to carve out what happy is that’s divorced from “find man = instant happiness” I think if you’d look past your own bias towards single women you’ll see a ton of nuanced takes on how women feel being single. I’ve seen a spectrum of feelings towards singleness throughout t…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/26 03:47 PM
–

This rings so true. I don’t ever talk about singleness out loud.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/26 03:37 PM
3

And I think you’re applying behavior to all women when it was the few you dealt with.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/26 06:21 PM
3

Why label this as a debate if your emotions are in the way? No one can debate how you feel. I hope you feel better OP!
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/26 06:04 PM
2

Men literally don’t even see the women they’re not attracted to. So they don’t even understand what you’re saying and go to extremes to avoid accountability in their words. Over and over here it’s “men are desperate!” “We think all women are attractive!” “We can’t get a date!”, absolutely untrue.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/26 05:22 PM
5

You said earlier you’ve been on 2 dates that have made you feel this way. That’s not a big enough sample size for you to apply this to dating a whole. My guess is that your general snippy tone and belief that all women are a certain way is eliciting these responses rather than your opinion having some truth to it.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/26 05:07 PM
12

Are you seeing the misogyny too? Because I’m confused. Everyday guys get in here and spout cruel things about almost every type of women under the guise of truth. Even scrolling just now I saw tons of topics regarding women, where is “the misandry” you speak of? This feels like you’re labeling a few women criticizing men as misandry because you don’t like what they’re saying rather than it being an actual issue your sons will have to face.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/26 06:41 PM
–

“Older (30+) embittered, less desirable” and “jealousy” is also a narrative ya’ll refuse to drop as well. You’re applying negative traits and silly ideas to older women only because you don’t desire them. Full stop. What’s sad actually is men’s obsession with making both younger and older women feel bad about aging.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/26 04:46 PM
-3

The guys here really think women have a dating playbook and are highly skilled in manipulation. We’re all just trying to live life for the fist time.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/26 06:37 PM
15

I wish you’d noted that she wasnt good to you because this makes total sense why you’d response that way.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/26 03:40 AM
3

NGL I’m guilty of thinking similar. I hope I’m not the annoying older coworker in like a few decades.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/26 03:39 AM
26

Job related age discrimination happens to most older workers, male or female. Unfortunately older workers are undervalued and a lot are especially struggling in this job market. But yep, we get it you guys, old women are icky and you’re happy when you get to witness anything that makes them feel bad (apparently even your own family) because you dislike women. I know, for you it’s a shame they don’t just die instead of aging, right OP, lol! Instead of relishing in an older women’s misery you know…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/26 02:16 AM
9

So far, the men who have approached me have majority been kind, so yes I would like men to approach me. I do think the meet cute is dead though. One of the reasons is the general distrust between strangers. People are super prickly. Even I’ve had interactions and I’m like “tf is up with that person?”
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 01:22 AM
10

I often find here that men’s version of “critique” is interpolating information to come up with the same conclusion “men suffer because women bad”. Then women are argued down with gotchas because you’ve already made your mind up, you’re just trying to find people to agree with you. Feminist subs are not there for this type of argument. It would be like me going to a crochet subreddit, finding a study about how watercolor is more relaxing. Then arguing with commenters and mods when they tell me i…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/26 07:21 PM
8

Yep, absolutely would.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/26 01:49 AM
1

This is exactly how I feel, thank you. When you’ve been existing in this low state the confidence, energy and excitement just aren’t there.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/26 04:13 AM
1

I know! We can relate more than they think!
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/26 04:12 AM
1

Thats a good question, I think it is important. Unfortunately society is set up for couples. No, I don’t think a woman like me would be considered exotic or desirable in any other country so it’s never crossed my mind. My thing is that if I couldn’t land one when i was younger, me landing one when I’m older would be a ridiculous notion.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/26 08:13 PM
–

So my initial point stands. Men are incapable of relating to women so they constantly question them until they get an answer they can use as a “gotcha” to validate their own views as you’ve exhibited here.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/26 05:59 AM
3

I appreciate it you taking the time to address each reason. Thank you :) As far a socialness. My hobbies are pretty solitary too. And I think I’m just at the point where I’m older and I really don’t have the energy to seek out social groups.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/26 05:40 AM
–

I’m not in the 99% though and struggle terribly with dating or I wouldn’t be single for years. I noted above I’m not talking about happily single women or women who can easily hop from relationship to relationship. While I don’t face the same issues exact issues as men why don’t you think I can relate to feeling lonely, undateable, low self esteem and everything that comes from being involuntarily single? Isn’t this a space in which we can relate?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/26 05:39 AM
–

Working, improving my skills, trying to get healthier, get better financially, therapy for metal health. Enjoy my lil hobbies. I’m focused on setting myself up as well as I can for a future alone and trying not to feel too down. If I’m going to be miserable I need to atleast be as comfortable as I can be.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/26 05:36 AM
–

Not all humans pair up and forever single women have existed forever no matter what you believe. I also wish guys would stop trying to push online dating and weird Reddit posts as evidence of desirability. This completely derails genuine and productive conversations.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/26 04:01 AM
–

I totally agree with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/26 03:08 AM
–

So why not relate to the minority who identify as femcels instead of denying they exist of constantly challenging their lived experiences?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/26 02:47 AM
–

Really good point, it really is rare to hear from the content single man in discussions regarding relationship dynamics. I don’t believe any relationship minded topics are on my side. I actually need to avoid these topics because they’re not helpful. I think the omission is mainly 1 and 2 happens when all these unhappy single women don’t share their experiences.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 11:36 PM
3

Literally all my answers have been measured and consistent. Not sure who you’re talking about but it’s not me.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 10:24 PM
–

They could but they choose not to. It’s too ingrained that “all women can find someone” so it immediately shuts down the conversation between men and women about the difficulties in dating (especially if you’re neurotypical).
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 10:22 PM
–

In this dream reality of yours, women who work and pay taxes, do they also have to be prostitutes as well?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 09:36 PM
–

I’d just noted on a previous post that I am a forever single and I see this often throughout the conversation. These happily single women are ones that got out of long term relationships or choose to be single (usually not for long). The subset of women who are not single by choice are largely removed from the conversation for 2 reasons I think. 1. No one cares, theyre not hurting anyone and at worst they’re sulking but otherwise harmless. They already know their flaws and trying to exist as har…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 08:34 PM
8

I don’t think women here face criticism, it’s actually insults under the guise of discussion and debate. Guys here interlace what could be valid criticism with spite, which immediately turns the topic contentious. Women are called all type of nicknames, Incorrect talking points are parroted and assumptions about women run rampant. If you disagree (either with personal anecdotes or facts)then they pivot and move goal posts or even insult.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 05:05 PM
5

I don’t know their intent of course but none of them resulted in a date or went further than a bit of back and forth so yes, none of them wanted to date me. Yes, I unmatched because I don’t like desperate swipes and I prefer not to have to do the work of figuring out if a man likes me when he should have been more thoughtful as he swiped. Again, online dating metrics do not make my point moot, I guess it solidifies that dating is different for men and women which…is not really what I was pointin…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 04:12 PM
11

Personal: low self esteem, low signaling, emotionally unavailable, depressed, I’m older now so for me it’s a wrap (for others I know that’s not true so I only speak for myself here) Environment: I hate being in social spaces, I have few friends and little opportunity to find other singles. Physical: I’m sure I could lose weight.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 04:06 PM
9

Oo! Dating apps gotcha! You’re so right men fall to my feet! You and I both know guys swipe desperately and indiscriminately. Using “likes” as metric to test if I’m actually undateable is a moot point. Try to actually engage with me in good faith rather than trying to prove your incorrect point. It’s so weird that you guys can’t seem to believe any women can be single. You all know not everyone finds someone right? You know there are women men don’t want right??
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 03:29 PM
14

As usual ya’ll get progressively ruder anytime a woman here admits she’s undateable. It’s really weird and ya’ll should figure out why this makes you so catty.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 03:25 PM
10

The fact that you’re so convinced women like me don’t exist in larger numbers is so funny. Yep! Every single women on planet earth gets into a relationship! What a lovely worldview.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 02:42 PM
26

Thank you. All these comments prove how little guys want to relate to women so all they do is call me ugly and throw out stupid little jabs.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 02:40 PM
10

I just think you’re twisting yourself up to fit your own narrative and paint me as a feminist villain which I’m truly not here to really engage with. You’ve made a point, you haven’t really understood mine, so we’ll leave it at that.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 02:36 PM
13

In my original comment I noted that I was not the majority and I’m going to be alone. So this doesn’t apply to me. You must know there’s women who can’t get this attention you think all women get right?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 02:33 PM
19

Feminists made it very clear through media, studies, rally’s, conversations what they wanted out of life and men. You and I are at the tail end of decades worth of feminism so it makes sense that it looks simply like guys simply decided to listen to women. What’s lacking with these calls for empathy is beyond basic human empathy, which majority of people already exhibit - what more are you asking for specifically. ya’ll are not doing the work to tell us what you’re thinking then getting annoyed …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 09:52 AM
13

Yeahhh, I’d hoped that I wouldn’t be one but…here we are lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 09:43 AM
24

A million and one reasons that I accept. I just noted my singleness to emphasize the point that I get how it feels to have long dry spells, feeling undesirable, rejection, lack of abundance, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 09:33 AM
8

Well no, another man answered you with his personal thoughts - not a woman, so that doesn’t justify your point at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 09:30 AM
30

Nope - average, lovely curves, long hair, smells good, dress well - all that. The implication that you have to be ugly/fat to be alone is actually insane. There’s a faction of incredibly average women who are simply alone. Do you think everyone finds someone?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 09:29 AM
55

I mean as a woman who falls outside of norm for most women, I do understand. It’s likely I’ll never be in a relationship and it’s a hard reality to accept. That being said, every time a guy brings up how women should empathize with them, they can’t seem to answer how or why How do you think we can get billions of women to collectively empathize, and what does that look like? If you ask the women who are less fortunate in love to empathize, would this help? Why would you ask for women’s opinion i…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 08:58 AM
16

Fr, just a random shot at childless women as usual. We’re just so awful and terrible.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/26 05:42 AM
–

The less effort the better amirite ladies?!
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/26 03:25 PM
0

This is the general advice throughout the internet though so to give it a negative twist to adhere to your POV is just going to hurt your own feelings. People who truly struggle with dating already know this is bullshit said by people who stumbled into their partners easily and never really had to try. As with all advice, take it with a grain of salt and extract only what you can feasible do or deem valuable. But try not to twist it because you feel a type of way.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/26 07:00 PM
3

I know it’s not the point but I’m likely not as attractive as you and I think your perspective is totally valid.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/26 11:47 AM
2

I just know what I look like, and it’s not great.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/26 02:35 AM
8

In my opinion, not at all. Not even sympathize. It’s a VERY unique experience when no one is interested in you.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/26 01:45 AM
14

9 yrs 👑 lol. I’m not attractive and stay inside. I think the less interest you have the less confidence you have to keep trying so I’m not going to try ever again. I can comprehend because that’s my situation
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/26 01:31 AM
33

“Being motivated to help alleviate it” is the main sticking point in these conversations between men and women about dating. Women can’t move together to make dating reform. Dating is personal to each human not a law or policy that can be reworked. So once we pat you on the back after a compassionate conversation what then? Would you feel better? Additionally the fact that men can’t seem to accept that a lot of women have a few similar lived realities in dating as men do cuts off compassionate c…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 06:01 PM
1

I totally agree. Idk why commenters here act like everyone ends up partnered. Throughout history there have been lifetime singles so yes some people are not meant to find a partner. I’m so confused by the comments arguing against this. People who had an easy time finding a relationship often will never understand those who can’t. I do wish people would stop othering single people as if they’re a whole different species and accept that they’re not weird, dangerous or pathetic.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/26 10:07 PM
2

It’s so odd to me that guys here “other” single women so much. Apparently getting married or being in a relationship instantly changes your chemistry and you’ll be a okay forever. There should be a name for the phenomena of men perceiving older women as bad simply because they don’t see as attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/25 10:00 AM
1

That’s why the conversation of single women here will never be productive. Guys here seem to not believe that some of these older single women were never in demand. They didn’t have options. They will vehemently disagree this is even a thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/25 09:48 AM
11

Wonderfully said, thank you! Stacey ain’t worried about my ugly ass, lol!
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/25 09:22 PM
9

This is such an interesting retrofitting of history to your skewed ideology. The cope here is super impressive. The fact that you’re using Mad Men as an accurate portrayal is telling, it would be like using vintage ads as hard proof how everyone lived. 1960s monogamy was not fair, sexually exclusive or driven by driven by hot to hot mating. Historically, Alpha men always had mistresses, sex workers, etc. Hot women locking down top men is a TV fantasy - these hot men always tried to sleep with wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/25 08:35 PM
3

“mid” women are bad. If a hot women wanted these things she’s fine and she deserves it. But if she’s Mid?! She really shouldn’t even have been born honestly.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/25 08:01 PM
11

Ugh, curse those mids. They’re the cause of all of life’s suffering.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/25 07:52 PM
–

It’s so interesting to see how men and women perceive what is essentially self esteem. When a women who isn’t conventionally attractive either receives compliments or likes how they look, guys are baffled. It really seems as though guys want “ugly” women to feel bad for existing. Very interesting. Most women have a very clear picture of what they look like. So when they embrace their looks and accentuate their best features, a hint of confidence comes with that. We already know we don’t look lik…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/25 03:19 AM
3

Ngl - very interesting perspective. I appreciate you sharing your thoughts.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 03:27 AM
5

Every once in a while, guys remember an additional group of women to all of a sudden analyze and chastise.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 12:55 AM
6

I find that being single for so long , you don’t really envision a relationship. It feels like something that happens for others.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 12:54 AM
5

In your opinion what would this achieve for both the single women and the people critiquing?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/25 12:53 AM
6

These women have always existed and have been largely ignored. Honestly, I hope we don’t normalize bringing attention to this demographic because they’ve had a lifetime of pity and snide comments. They don’t need more. As a forever single women my only hope is that I can live my life miserably peaceful without being the subject of a think piece.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/12/25 07:50 PM
14

I get what you’re saying. John really can’t afford to swipe selectively considering there’s no general agreement that every other guy will.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/25 07:03 AM
49

When you swipe on every woman, even the ones you don’t want to date that doesn’t guarantee more matches so why do it? It’s a bit delusional to use the apps this way. All you’re doing is flooding women with false likes. Now they have to dig through a bunch of men who aren’t interested. This then tires out both men and women and creates another layer of disillusion. Why do men think they’ll ever have tons of likes? That not even how dating works for most humans.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/25 03:48 AM
3

I didn’t get into it because I didn’t want to go into a “woe is me” soliloquy. But yeah, there are many specific things.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/25 08:41 PM
6

Nope! Just living and existing. But I recognize that I have qualities that are off-putting and I also do not put myself out there. Im not saying your friends don’t have good qualities so maybe they are just not in the right places to meet people they vibe with.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/25 07:31 PM
7

I’m a pretty decent looking human with a good traits. Yet I’m undateable. What I don’t do is question men’s standards. It’s obvious I’m lacking something or I’m not meeting people I relate to. I can imagine that could be the situation with your friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/25 07:17 PM
11

I agree here, most people who have decided to not continue dating do so quietly. We’re so distracted by the loud minority who are filming or posting about remaining single. Most forever singles are just existing without yelling it to the world.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/25 05:12 PM
–

Very true, it’s okay to acknowledge that unfortunately race does play into interpersonal dynamics.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/25 04:43 PM
–

Oh totally.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/25 04:28 PM
–

I mean OP’s experience isn’t the standard. So hey.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/25 04:28 PM
–

I mean, you don’t need to argue my lived experience because you don’t get it. It’s odd that you’re reacting this strongly.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/25 04:27 PM
–

Dating is vastly different for various races. I’ve found that I can’t relate to a ton of experiences here specifically because of those differences.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/25 03:58 PM
–

I wish this was the case for me. My introverted, fairly boring self is truly failing at dating. I feel like this also strongly depends on where you live and who you are and how attractive/young you are. For example, I live in a huge city, full of interesting people - so a level of social is highly expected. Additionally, as a BW I’m expected to be a certain way which is not introverted. I’m also older so the odds are truly not in my favor. I think you’re also not taking into account what their g…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/25 02:21 PM
–

I hate to agree and be nihilistic but I feel this way too. That’s why I’m so frustrated with the societal badge of failure of you don’t get married or have kids. That’s just not something everyone can achieve due to various circumstances. I see myself as undateable for a variety of reasons and my lack of success solidifies this. If I can veer into religion for a sec - even biblical text mentions single people as being whole so I wish we’d remove the stigma of being alone and not instantly being …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/25 03:41 AM
2

Oof, I’d hate for some guy to pity me so much that he does this. I hope you don’t do this often and just treat everyone normally.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/25 09:33 PM
15

There’s always been a faction of people that remain single for various reasons. This is believable.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/12/25 09:48 PM
6

It’s so interesting how this type of argument points to the relationship dynamics of the past. Most people reading this or even on this forum were not part of the generation that fought to work outside the home. We literally do not know the world in which women didn’t work. So to point to the past and be like “haha well ya’ll wanted this huh?” Is weird to me. At this point in time there’s no going back and unless you have a solution on how yo survive on one income - it’s illogical to blame us fo…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/25 08:14 AM
–

That’s the thing with this subreddit. I have to remember a lot of these don’t apply to me as a BW.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 10:30 PM
–

The general issue with women being employed is the most confusing to me. Were we supposed to wait around in our parents homes until a guy scoops us up to pay for the rest of our lives? How many men are a okay with that today? Ofc women have to have jobs.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 10:17 PM
6

Honestly? That’s fair I agree. I’ve never been one to dismiss how important relationships are so I personally don’t get others who do.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 03:23 PM
13

It’s exhausting women over a certain age, making younger women nervous about aging and making guys think older women somehow all become angry the minute they age and thus treat older women worse. All over really bad line of thought I wish we’d all move on from.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/25 11:45 PM
25

Anytime ya’ll bring up this claim I find you can’t help but add “old and bitter”. This is how I know that the argument is in bad faith. You already perceive women over a certain age this way and want to find evidence to support your POV. I say this as an unhappy, older single woman - you’re ascribing negative traits to human being just trying to exist. They’re not gaming the system to trick men - why would being single make one so much more cunning and conniving than women in relationships?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/25 11:05 PM
14

This is what I’m struggling to understand as well. Ya’ll either don’t want these women, they’re too “old” or they’re not in the dating pool. They shouldn’t even be on these guys minds but here’s yet another post. It’s okay for women to exist single. Sheesh.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/12/25 10:47 PM
2

You’re speaking so confidently, where are you getting your data from? How many dates have you been on?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/25 06:24 PM
–

As I was reading it, I was also noting that women face these things so much as well. Society is cruel to those who can’t/don’t want to follow the “main” path.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/25 07:43 PM
–

I remember watching media when I was younger in the 00s and the women were obsessed with men. There were wacky adventures for men, tons of love stories, “hottest celebrity guys”, girls in h.s crushing over a guy walking in slow motion. It was always a confusing representation to me because very few girls irl really had that energy. I feel like media had people fooled. Overall, I don’t think women are less attracted but they’re not overall excited by the idea of men. Certain men? Sure. But not gu…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/25 05:02 PM
–

OP, what’s you’re describing is very easy to find and quite normal. Most women are not super closed off. Maybe because you’re religious this feels exciting and new but it’s pretty common. So common that it’s not really considered a kink. When you say you’re open to kinks, most people would envision something more adventurous. You don’t need to explicitly ask for this on an app. This is more something you’ll figure out in conversation. You should also make it clear that you’re waiting until marri…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/25 04:35 AM
2

I just think comparing the dating experiences of attractive women to all men skews the data. Average and below women often have very different experiences in dating than a beautiful woman. If we allow nuance for men’s experience why are we only pointing to the top 10% of women when comparing?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/25 07:16 AM
9

Exactly. When men talk about women here they onlyconsider young attractive women.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/25 02:03 AM
1

Let’s assume men have various reasons why they would not say yes - already in a relationship, too old/too young, not interested, etc. With that reasoning in mind, it makes more sense that you’d get more no’s then yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/25 10:45 PM
0

The idea women will generally get many more yeses than no’s if they arbritraily went around asking men out. Pure fantasy.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/25 08:47 PM
0

The world you exist in must be fun, OP.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/25 07:33 PM
14

Ehhhhh…this whole thread is women actually telling you how they think and feel and you rebutting with how you think they feel.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/25 05:55 PM
1

No, it’s male fantasy that this would happen. 9/10 times men will not be interested, but there’s an odd bubble going on here.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/25 05:50 PM
11

Dating intention-less is what makes dating messy and annoying for those who actually know what they’re looking for. Whether you want casual or serious you need to understand and be able to state your own goals. Instead you’re leaving the other party to guess for you and have the complete responsibility of knowing you’re incompatible. That’s unreasonable. The “haha idk! Let’s see how this goes!” is reckless for most long term planning.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/25 05:56 PM
6

For some specific women absolutely. But most this is not reality.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/25 09:19 PM
15

This is a myth that I wish we’d stop perpetuating - Majority of women do not have scores of men desperately wanting to date them. Stop using this to invalidate actual comments from actual women.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/25 08:48 PM
53

“Winning being single”. Lol. There’s no deep villain story when women are single. There is no game. some women just cant find anyone and gave up, others just got out relationships, some are truly happy single. The ebb and flow of life happened and everyone is doing the best they can.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/25 06:34 PM
–

I think it’s 3 things: the fact that in order to find a compatible man, you have to encounter the ones who are not and it’s not always a pleasant experience. In the past we weren’t as exposed to incompatible men. Men en masse are not entirely desirable and never were. We’re seeking out one partner - it doesn’t make sense to me that we’d find majority of men desirable. Were grew up seeing the men in our friends and families lives treating them badly. Now we see an internet full of horrible relati…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/25 05:49 PM
3

Depends on who: Social media? Absolutely clocked plus some decent advice and anecdotes from strangers. Friends and family? When asked, they will. I’ve had candid convos with those people in my life and they’ve highlighted some of my flaws and expectations. I usually appreciate it. That being said normal women don’t usually have unrealistic standards. Idk why ya’ll don’t believe life humbles everyone real quick. Especially if you’re below average.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/25 05:35 AM
3

Well no? Your criticism is backed up by dubious personal anecdotes, your personal perspective of the world. That’s not valid societal grievance, that’s literally just your opinion.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/25 07:10 PM
3

I think this wonderfully touches on a core issue in criticism. Most critsicm of women from men is essentially “whining” about women they don’t like rather than women’s behavior as a whole. I’d actually try to listen if it wasn’t majority thinly veiled insults at women they find unattractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/25 06:59 PM
7

I mean - in what way can we really disprove this for you? Theres no mass study on the promiscuity of women nor is there a true barometer of what promiscuous means to every man. 5 partners? 10? 15? Unless you want to throw out a survey then no one can confirm how common this is. No one can talk you off the ledge of your own frankly, wild assumptions. But, out of millions of women it’s safe to assume that a major portion feel similarly to you - you have the hard job (like the rest of us) of findin…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/11/25 02:11 AM
24

Id like to point out the societal rather than the personal as well. I think a main sticking point is that we’re less social and more isolated, more distracted, stressed. The quiet, awkward or not naturally forward don’t have easy ways to connect as they may have in the past. Right now, apps are a popular way to meet but for a lot of men that’s not a system that could work nor would it have worked for the men in the past either. Essentially I’m saying that while there are personal issues that cou…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/25 07:35 PM
5

Yes! It’s very common here for guys with few cordial female relationships in their lives to demonize women for existing in ways they don’t personally like. This is yet another example of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/25 01:34 PM
3

Well it’s not all feminists, just because women don’t really like the behavior of the men they’ve dealt with doesn’t mean they’re feminists. What you’re seeing is not a new hate fest, it’s what various women have always believed but now have the chance to express along with others who agree with them. Men to this day are still treating women badly, we see open admission here all the time. Throughout the internet men blame women for their dating woes, call for stripping of rights, expound on mani…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/25 06:28 PM
1

Good at conversation, engaging, charming. A match is only the start of actually courting someone.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/25 04:09 PM
2

Friend, in my comment to you I noted that these men were shooting down and should have left me alone. Indicating that I already acknowledged they were out of my league. I know you’re chomping at the bit to hurt a women’s feelings but you’re arguing a point I just made.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/25 02:51 PM
2

You don’t know how I utilized the apps or what I was looking for. Guys have to stop presuming they know how average women move. Even with minimal matches these average men are not optimizing their matches. They’re swiping on everyone and barely making good conversation with the women they match with.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/25 02:37 PM
3

Ah, you have talking points that are unshakeable in the face of someone telling you the exact experience. Well, you’re right, my lived experience is wrong, congrats.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/25 02:34 PM
5

These were men who matched with me, so they were shooting down and should have left me alone then. Either way, plenty of other women report the same things. Men have to take accountability and admit that they don’t utilize online dating apps well enough to optimize their own matches.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/25 01:59 PM
5

I always forget that anytime they complain about dating dynamics it’s because they’re comparing the experiences of average to below average men to pretty 20 something year olds instead of the average woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/25 01:57 PM
18

This implies that all men are incredibly desperate. Which feels like you’re painting a pathetic brush for guys here. In my experience online dating, guys don’t jump at the chance to engage with women as you’re describing here. It’s barely filled out profiles, short answers, palpable disinterest, not planning dates, ghosting. It’s not an arena of men who are enamored and interested in you. Remember that you are also seeing tons of wonderful options - average women don’t always stand out to you ei…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/25 06:00 PM
11

I mean…a bio is usually just a short blurb. If it’s terrible effort to read and then swipe then you either need a break or maybe online dating isn’t for you. Reading a bio or taking a good look at the photos after you’ve matched is still exerting effort. You’re actually meant to take a bit of time to sort through people whether or not that results in a match. It’s time consuming (and sometimes demoralizing) but how much less effort do you really think connection this way should take? This line o…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/25 08:37 PM
2

It usually because they’re desperate, it was a dare/prank or they’re purposefully trying to be mean. Very rarely because they actually like you.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/25 08:29 PM
-1

Guys here constantly say things amounting to “just be skinny and guys will love you! Otherwise you must be deformed!” It’s just simply not true, yet they will not admit that it takes way more than that to be an attractive prospect. It also doesn’t take into account that guys have varying tastes or even race, personality or anything else. This lie perpetuates so strongly here that it’s often used to dismiss any woman’s legitimate dating points.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/25 08:21 PM
5

I think also not seeing the face of rejection is also great too.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/25 06:10 PM
-4

If that was the case I’d be drowning in attention. Guys hate to admit that being attractive to them requires a lot more than they’d like to admit.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/25 06:10 PM
-5

As usual there’s the constant idea that women aren’t rejected and just do the rejecting. If you’re an unattractive women they’re all bad, but dating events are even worse. It’s just a matter of where you feel better confirming you’re undesirable. At least on apps you don’t have to see your much better competition.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/25 05:28 PM
2

It’s not an opportunity because it’s never for a good reason. They should stick within their own league.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/25 02:59 PM
13

This is truly the best answer. Guys here act as though women don’t have a truly accurate view on how they look and how men treat unconventionally attractive women all the time. It’s more likely than not they’re approaching an unattractive women for bad reasons.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/25 02:58 PM
2

I think theyve built up these women I their minds as enemies so they want to strike out. They seem to believe these women rejected a ton of nice guys, have similar traits to women who’ve rejected them or these women periceve themselves as better than them. They’re angry at the imaginary persona they’ve imprinted onto these women. As an older single woman whom no guy has ever truly been interested in and accepted a life alone- it would be great if these guys who continually complain about women l…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/25 09:53 PM
7

To me, it’s fine for a first date especially if you’re just meeting from the apps. But hearing guys admit that they put forth low effort if you’re not hot does bum me out a bit. Unrelated but related, when I hear guys various dating strategies it solidifies why I should never date again.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 02:14 PM
–

I wish this was a more nuanced take because some women really are not relationship material. But, instead it seems to be the ramblings of yet another guy who just snapped out of the “women are wonderful effect” by ingesting copious amounts of social media bullshit. Have you been in a relationship? Have you observed normal relationships? Have you at all heard from average women? Because this reeks of someone who hasn’t and is just lashing out using things they’re heard rather than experienced The…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 02:43 AM
7

I don’t think it’s a matter of good enough/worthy. If that was necessary for relationships then selfish assholes wouldn’t be married. But, I do think a lot of guys don’t really know how to treat/interact with women and they have demands that a women needs to orbit their lives and abandon hers - it makes it hard to date. In my dating history, guys have been so unkind and frustrating to deal with - that’s one of the reasons I opted out.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 12:25 AM
–

I felt the same when I was semi successfully getting dates, people are alright. Even in my daily life I don’t really find people particularly interesting. I figure it’s a me issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 05:21 PM
–

For reference I’m older and very alright looking. I’m also a woman of color which this sub doesn’t even factor into their conversations. Rarely. Maybe once or twice every couple years lol, never. Majority of people I know are in relationships and have been in relationships for years. If I really try to woo some guy who’s not interested but horny, probably. Never. I don’t doubt I’ll be single forever.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 05:18 PM
9

Yes! Ill never get why these guys with see a women they don’t like peacefully existing and just want to torment her? Like leave us be!
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 07:16 AM
13

I know men believe they’re wonderful actors and all women are charmed by their acts but desperation is very obvious. Especially to women who you consider “below average” because men like you keep trying to get away with things like this. You’re okay breaking these women because you think nothing of them. It’s unfortunate but obviously a lot of guys seem to agree with you so…go ahead OP.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 07:10 AM
13

IMO it’s bad when anyone does it.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 07:04 AM
14

I don’t have to point out to you that this is cruel since you gleefully already know that. So I’ll question your tactics Do you believe you can keep up the charade convincingly enough? Usually if you don’t like someone it’s obvious even if they are desperate. As far the empathy you need for any good relationship: Does your morality factor in or is it absent because you think she’s beneath you? Do you consider the drawbacks for the human woman being used and discarded?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 06:47 AM
8

I think it’s treated as paranoia because guys are freaking themselves out over a situation that hasn’t happened yet. These guys are rarely in relationships, not married, going on coffee dates and terrified of the idea of being asked for a $20 by their partner. That’s paranoid and an incredibly negative view on women. Women are not en masse rubbing their hands together trying to take your money. We’re all working, most relationships evenly split household bills. Since you have experience being ta…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/25 06:17 PM
6

I also find that if their theory is wrong and it’s not for a man’s attention, then the next theory is that women are doing something to be spiteful instead. We can’t just be existing, lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/25 09:37 PM
3

Most likely a woman is wearing said outfit because they love how they look. They know it flatters them and when you find an outfit that accentuates your body it feels good to wear it. If I had a body I really liked, I’d be wearing sexy things and I’m totally single and not looking. You find it odd because generally guys are not really trying to look cute/hot unless it’s to directly impress usually a girl or some fancy event in which they have to.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/25 09:36 PM
12

What about the other women willing to have sex? Why string this one along?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/25 02:46 AM
11

I figured so, why else seek out someone to treat them badly.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/25 02:21 AM
29

Why not leave her alone and focused on the women you actually want? It seems needlessly cruel when you have plenty of other women to pursue.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/25 01:31 AM
14

Because obviously women at 35 are icky and apparently if they’re not married they should be thanos snapped out of existence when they hit 30.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/25 01:24 AM
7

NO shame for women?? There’s such, constant, normalized shame that it seems you think it hasn’t always been there.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/25 08:32 PM
2

I kind of agree here but we tend to underestimate that there’s a heavy societal expectations to getting married. We also shame women who aren’t married as well, they’re sad, broken, bitter, etc. so I can see why women glorify making it to the alter. Shame, marketing and pressure have had a heavy hand in building up this mentality.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 06:43 PM
3

In seeing OP’s answers it’s super obvious that he can’t perceive actual human women. He’ll use weird examples to directly defy your lived experience or try to shut you down with the same ol talking points. I’ve had very similar experiences to you, I get it.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 01:31 PM
15

I honestly wish seeing your enemies live badly helped, but you’ll just be laughing in your own misery. You’ll just be angry, more likely to lash out on terrible ways that will directly mess with your life. How will that improve your mental health?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/25 09:45 PM
58

How often do you guys feel like you’ll be put in a position to help/defend random women? Why do you feel as though you’re even equipped to do so? If I’m in danger, you’re probably in danger too, lol, you’re not jack reacher or some highly trained assassin. When have you actually shown empathy towards women’s issues? I’m a little confused at how you think you’re currently helping out societally. The only thing struggling men can really do is live as best as they can (not happily, but as best as t…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/09/25 08:54 PM
6

I’m sure you don’t like every single women you’ve ever met. Therefore you are actively choosing who you swipe yes on, which woman you may talk to irl, who you hit on(if you chose to do so).
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/25 02:57 AM
26

I think there’s this mindset that men don’t choose at all, they’re at the mercy of women in dating. Which is not true. Men chose and often it’s not personality based. If anything both men and women are filtering out their equivalents and being overly selective. If apps are the most common way of dating then that’s where the frustration is coming from. People are utilizing the apps which so rarely work and lead to hopelessness in dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 03:18 PM
5

Granted I don’t think rings should be tons of money but you do know there’s a difference between costume jewelry and real jewelry, right? It’s not about the cost - it’s about longevity. A fake diamond ring will not last through the daily wear and tear of existing for 30+ years. Would you trust a $20 work boot to last 10+ years? A $10 sneaker for 5+ yrs? $5 headphones? You have general understanding these won’t last why would a piece of jewelry be different? I think this is an interesting look in…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/25 03:09 AM
1

Same! I just assume they’re being generally decent and move on with my day. It would be delusional for me to think guys are constantly flirting.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/25 07:19 AM
31

In terms of something that offers you effortless pleasure, having a nice meal or indulging in something decadent is top tier. If sex feels like a chore or more effort than it’s worth to her then I can see her perspective. But that doesn’t make it a nice thing to tell your partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/25 05:28 PM
0

Guys have made it clear what their preferences are. There’s an entire N count thread because it’s a huge topic. There are multiple podcasts, posts, books, movies etc. centered around your ideal preferences. Most women try their best to adhere to the male sexual preference. Trust me, we know. It’s been validated by society as well. Women who fall outside of the sexual preference are well aware. What I think you’re seeing is a rejection of (a) how the message is communicated (b) men applying their…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 05:14 PM
3

It’s truly fascinating, they’ll take algorithm tailored content from OF models and skinny young women as if it’s the truth for all women. Yet wont simply look around when they go outside.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/25 06:17 PM
11

Absolutely not, lol. You’re going to treat that woman like shit whether you’re conscious of it or not. Guys who do this think they’re pulling a fast one and the woman doesn’t know she’s the rock bottom choice - but your disdain for her is painfully obvious in little ways. I think it’s cruel to use a woman you don’t like physically as a desperate placeholder and it’ll mess with her mental health.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/25 04:48 PM
11

I…no the vagina is not very stretched out indefinitely after having a kid. Friend, what type of education do you have that makes you believe this?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/25 01:47 AM
–

Yeh like but normal women are not doing all that. The level of time, skill and expense is not something that most women are going to do.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 06:53 PM
–

I think it’s so funny guys have the impression that simple makeup can transform you like a drag queen. Lol. Most women just look like 10% better than they would naturally.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 05:58 PM
1

Just an outing with someone (I hope) you really like. I think that’s the point of a date in general - just time spent.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 03:42 PM
1

While financial struggles are a major issue, i was more referring to people who simply just don’t find it easy to either get into a relationship or find someone who is interested. This could be regardless of financial status. If you are broke and find it hard to find a partner, making money will make you a little more desirable but it won’t address the core of why you cannot find a relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/25 06:20 PM
2

I feel the exact same - I get people are trying to be nice but I’m not delusional about my situation.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/25 05:03 PM
14

Okay so this is my personal opinion here - I think it’s person dependent rather than a general rule. If you’ve struggled through your whole life and now you’re older and still single- it’s not looking too good. I think your mindset is already too deep in the “it won’t happen” and it probably won’t. I’ve always had difficulty dating and attracting so as I’m in my 30s and I still can’t - I’ve reached the point of no return, it’s over for me. But if you’re someone who just got out of a relationship…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/25 02:44 AM
3

Specifically to point 4. Your lack of understanding of how women analyze themselves and their environments is so interesting to me. Lol. It’s just indicates how much guys “other”women when they don’t see them as human.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/25 08:31 PM
2

No one was interested. I got like 1-2 likes that netted out to nothing (conversation dropped off, not compatible, no follow up convo). At speed dating no one chose me.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/25 10:48 PM
3

Early 30s
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/25 03:20 PM
5

Not offensive at all, I absolutely have that aura. I am seeking out help. I really appreciate your advice.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/25 04:06 AM
8

I do but it’s a wrap for me. I just couldn’t even imagine dating at this point. BUT I’m not totally isolating myself. I will join hobby groups when I find them, still friendly to others when I’m outside, and ofc still maintaining how I look. But I’m like 99% certain I wont find anyone. I live in a huge city, full of pretty, fun and interesting people, there are so many better options.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/25 01:42 AM
10

Totally gonna sound woe is me but I figure my perspective is worth sharing. I’m not open to being partnered. I’ve tried online dating, speed dating, etc. and failed miserably. Honestly wrecked my self esteem so I’m not seeking anything. Being socially awkward, few friends, getting older - this doesn’t bode well for me and is one of many reasons I’m single. I’m looking for a very boring life. Which I understand is not appealing. But other than that I don’t think I have an impossible laundry list …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/25 12:40 AM
2

Exactly - idk where this myth of constant attention for all women IRL comes from. The average woman is generally not incredibly noticeable so they just don’t get influx of attention. Very few unless you’re always dressed in a unique way.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/25 04:47 PM
6

If I’m only talking online then I’ll never know lol. Sometimes I throw out a like to a really cute guy but I already understand the odds are not in my favor.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/25 12:43 AM
15

It’s always so interesting how guys think women operate on dating apps. I only swipe on “attainable” men. I never go for men hotter than me. Why would I do that? The core issue with online dating was never women going after all the hot men. No matter what a guy looks like that doesn’t factor in compatibility, if they’re interested in you, dry conversations, creepy interactions, mis matched interests, etc. That makes the process of vetting tiring and demoralizing - that’s mainly what makes online…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/25 11:27 PM
–

I only come here for the debates and sometimes the opinions shared here make me feel bad, so I keep coming back!
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 07:02 AM
1

Idk if either of these solution would make these guys feel heard or cared for. Neither a sex worker nor AI care about you so keeping up with the delusion that they do may make these guys emotional well being even worse off. I also don’t think this will help with the general issue that we’re lonely societally. While guys are suffering a lot everyone is more isolated - these solutions would make the problem worse.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/25 07:58 PM
2

I appreciate that, I’m still trying to do fun or useful things here and there.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/25 12:50 AM
4

Im sorry for your experience. I think that’s a huge factor - It’s self loathing mixed with anger/sadness too.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 07:03 PM
1

Thank you - I always joke to my friends that if that happens they should play the lottery because apparently miracles come true lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 03:41 PM
10

How did I waste your time when you went from 0-60 under my comment?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 12:12 PM
5

:(
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 09:33 AM
29

I’m honored to bond in our shared misery.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 09:25 AM
11

I ain’t say all that lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 09:22 AM
20

That’s the running script here, if a woman has any dating issues she’s not just a regular human navigating life instead she’s getting what she deserved.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 07:41 AM
18

Ive had 1 real relationship. Tried apps and speed dating - one or no likes weekly (none of those convos evolved into dates for various reasons) and no men chose me back at speed dating events. Trust me, I’ve tried.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 07:38 AM
33

Throughout my life, I’ve felt very little interest from men, so essentially I felt like there was no real option but to not place my focus on them. Now I’m older and find it futile to even try - so I guess it was an unintentional decentering. Because of that it doesn’t feel like I made a bold choice to not date or whatever, it just is what it is.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 06:59 AM
1

A lot of guys here outright dismiss the notion of women being rejected as if it’s just a “you” thing and can’t be possible for a lot of women. “Undesirable” women feel similar angst and sadness being consistently overlooked.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/25 04:34 AM
2

I mean this is purely anecdotal but I’m not single by choice. No guy is interested, been like this for years, it’s totally possible to be this type of single as a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/25 04:31 AM
1

Is this meant to be an advice based sub though? I thought it was basically just a discussion forum. If you have strongly held beliefs about dating, it’s likely nothing here will change your POV. We all interact with things that either reinforce our beliefs or make us react but rarely challenge our thinking enough to change perspective. You may want too much from PPD.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/25 12:31 PM
1

I’m single after 30 and didn’t reject a single person - all I’m saying is that you all have a such a specific idea of what women encounter in dating that you simply cannot imagine exceptions.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/25 08:54 PM
2

I agree with you. You have to be incredibly sociable - to an unsustainable level to even kind of meet someone. You get all this advice to go outside 24/7 by all these people who didn’t have to do all that. Not everyone has that energy or magnetic pull to land someone easily in social spaces. If you’re just a quiet, normal, maybe boring person it’s doesn’t feel like there are too many opportunities.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/25 07:31 PM
4

How many women do you truly think have this experience? I’m always confused by guys thinking that all women have the experience of attractive, young women.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/25 07:08 PM
4

That’s what always cracks me up about guys listing off all these things they have to do. You know all you’re doing is half assedly messaging women.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/25 07:06 PM
–

Just to highlight one piece of this - I’m always a little confused by the notion that women work in an office job as a direct “f you” to men. Why is this constantly brought up as if we’re substituting a family structure with office work to find fulfillment…we’re simply working. What is the ideal realistic alternative here - are men en masse okay with supporting women financially forever to ensure society doesn’t fall apart?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 11:02 AM
1

Was there a breakdown on why women won’t engage? I think it’s less to do with how they look than what’s on their profiles.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 12:17 AM
2

I’ve seen so many women acknowledge that the apps are not it - I think you should seek out women’s honest feelings on the apps, they’re not having a good time either. But I think there’s this (incorrect) idea that apps are fun, validation centers for women. While we often acknowledge it sucks for a vast majority of men, we also have to realize it’s not a great system for most.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 12:06 AM
3

I second this. for reference, I live in a HCOL area and most of the people I know with houses are married. It’s heavily understood that both their incomes went into the house and on a single income it’s rare to have a house. Most single individuals have roommates, live in slightly inconvenient/far places, or live with family. The very rare (and wealthy) single people have houses and apartments. I also agree that even though most of these people are not home owners they still have enough money to…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/25 11:01 PM
3

I hate to say this but I tend to agree. I find myself skipping over people in love in the comments section (especially here). They often haven’t been recently active in the dating market, don’t get what it’s like to struggle to date, or are judge-mental because they don’t get that love is not as easy to find for others as it was for them. They assume the main reason anyone could have a hard time dating is only due them being bad people. Again I agree, it’s unhelpful to most of the conversations …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/25 04:09 AM
4

SOME women will, some won’t. That’s just the definitive truth about this. There’s this really odd desire for all women to have a collective decision as if we get together and elect a board to decide how we all think. Throughout this thread you’ll see some women say yep while others don’t - is that enough acknowledgment? You can see that women agree with you, so now that you have that confirmation, will you also acknowledge the women’s often valid complaints as well?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 10:46 PM
2

Okay!
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 08:18 PM
1

LMAO. You’re the worst my friend. I hope whomever you raise is better than you.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 08:08 PM
3

It’s so funny to end this by lamenting about real women when he just described a movie protagonists flashback of his wife and kids. Real relationships are not endless days of rolling around in a field.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 07:20 PM
5

I feel like this is totally personal based on your own biases and misunderstanding of what someone is seeking in a conversation. I’m sure there are tons of reasonable answers from women and that you’ve dismissed to align with your conclusion here. Secondly those people who supposedly want to offer “solutions” can’t read the room. They come on too strong, are borderline mean or try to insert their “solutions” in spaces that they know they’re not welcome in. Then proceed to formulate half baked op…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 05:24 PM
41

I gave up, for two reasons and neither were because my options were terrible. 1 - I myself feel undatebale. Both physically and mentally i don’t think I’m a good candidate. In my experience dating that has been proven to be true, no man has been interested so essentially the market is telling me I’m not in it. 2 - the effort expended has not been worth it. I’ve tried the apps, dating irl, all the meet cute advice and nothing works. I’m an introverted person with a small friend group who likes be…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/25 05:41 PM
–

But if it’s brought on by mainly stimulating/pleasuring the genitals isn’t that the textbook definition of an orgasm?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/25 12:33 AM
–

What would you refer to what we currently call an orgasm for women? A muscle spasm? Lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/25 12:23 AM
10

When people date, they use their standards to pick partners. That’s as honest as one can get. How much more honest and upfront do you want people to be? I don’t think societally we’re not trying to condition people to date differently but it’s just an attempt to not publicly criticize those who fall outside these parameters.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/25 01:54 AM
11

I also feel like they don’t really consider the POC women who also don’t have these supposed advantages.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/25 04:15 PM
1

Really?! I’m surprised. 👀time to snoop a bit.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/25 04:13 PM
1

Easy to find - okay, there’s a community for everything on Reddit. But incel content is much more prevalent. You can easily stumble upon it in more places throughout the internet. Mainly because others repost to garner various reactions. To act as if there’s the same visibility in the content to boil down my points as “man hating” is simplistic analysis of my comment. I expressed my own difficulty dating and being an older lady, didn’t negatively speak upon men yet you’re telling me I dislike me…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/25 02:51 PM
2

I feel similar. But I think a lot of the modern push is in response to finding ways to accept your single situation without completely withdrawing, it’s a platitude to keep a positive mindset. But it’s often misguided affirmations that don’t take into account those who know they’ll be alone for the long run. I know I’ll never be in a relationship and I welcome not enduring decades of loneliness.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/25 08:00 PM
1

I’m sorry that your health is not doing well. I hope you have pain management that’s helping you out. Although I don’t deal with the same things as you, I have a very similar perspective. Aging, no matter if you’re single or partnered seems incredibly prolonged and dreadful. I don’t understand the obsession with a long life as well. Not to sound even darker but if my singleness takes years off my life then I’d prefer that over a long life guessing what diseases are taking over , slowly deteriora…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/25 07:56 PM
1

What is the fence subreddit? I curious to see what their rhetoric looks like
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/25 05:07 PM
0

If I want to discuss being forever alone with the women why would I want men there??
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/25 04:49 PM
1

FDS has not been active on Reddit for years. Even when it was, it was mocked. I scrolled through 2x for a long time. I think guys often forget that spaces in which women are discussing their issues - they’re not asking for men’s perspective so of course they’re going to be more hostile. It would be like walking over to a table of strangers, stealing their fries and then offering your opinion on the topic they were discussing. I honestly wish incels had a space in which they can discuss their iss…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/25 04:48 PM
2

Besides hurting your feelings, does femcel shit consistently have a call to action to hurt men? I feel like guys consistently ignore how extreme incel shit can get vs. some women being like “ugh I hate all men!”
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/25 04:35 PM
3

But when we look at the reasons why the incels hit got banned - it was usually for violent rhetoric. Femcels you’ll find a handful of wild takes everyone brushed off but for the most part it’s just a bunch of women who are talking about generally tame, easily ignorable topics.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/25 04:32 PM
10

Incel content is more readily available because there are countless posts from these guys that range from embarrassing to harmful. Of course they’re going to get backlash. Unless I truly look for femcel content it’s not widely available. If femcels were out here demanding government issued husbands then I’d understand. But that doesn’t mean that older single women aren’t already mad fun of. I think your 4th point holds some truth. As someone who doesn’t label myself but basically could be a femc…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/25 03:31 AM
9

Gain sexual access to a woman = access to a woman’s body so yes that’s what the commenter above is referring to. The issue guys here are presenting is that they cannot have sex easily. Why is that an issue?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/25 01:10 PM
31

I can acknowledge but I simply can’t empathize with men who complain that sexual access to a woman’s body. Men and women will never reach an understanding here because the risks sex pose often outweigh the benefits for woman. Knowing these risks, I can’t easily empathize.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/25 12:36 AM
198

I mean…is it supposed to be really easy to have sex with anyone? Do you not anticipate it would take a bit of extra effort? It’s not asking someone for gum - you’re trying to gain access to someone’s naked body and engage in something that’s intensely intimate. I get that some people do not view sex as special but majority do and can’t be convinced by getting a free drink and a quick chat by a random guy.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 05:55 PM
5

I think single women are consistently made fun of throughout history and this is just another evolution. Holier than thou people (often in relationships) and angry guys need someone to be make mean comments about. So the people who generated this realized the consistent engagement it got and kept churning it out. The mystery to me is if money isn’t being made from these posts, why keep making them? I guess general assholery?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/25 03:18 AM
1

From a purely logical POV - it makes sense that standards scale with QOL. You’re most likely around different people at different parts of your life who are meeting your new standards. Additionally if you, yourself have a certain quality of life - why wouldn’t you want a partner that could maintain that or help make it even better? I think guys often operate on just physical attributes so of course that standard doesn’t shift or change no matter what stage of life they’re at.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/25 04:49 PM
–

Fr, the sharing vibrators made me cringe lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/25 12:14 PM
8

I feel like you should add something about personality to this list. I guess that could be bundled into 4. A huge part of being with someone is how compatible your personalities are. But otherwise - If the goal is for the average man to completely turn off and remove any chance of getting with the average woman then this seems perfect, lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 04:53 PM
1

It’s like me being like “my favorite fruit is mango” and you’re like “well don’t you like all fruits?!” What’s the point of me needing to acknowledge that? Why do I have to justify my perspective to adhere to what you specifically want to hear? I already owned my truth by writing it out and posting it? I’m struggling to understand if what I said is true, and I just didn’t mention men’s experiences - what is your issue exactly?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/25 08:32 AM
1

You invalidated what I said by telling me this place is toxic regardless of the gender. I am aware, but since I am a woman, I am only speaking to what women go through. Therefore my comment will not represent the full PPD population, and that is a okay. Additionally, congrats on getting laid.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/25 08:16 AM
3

OP was specifically talking about women and I answered. My experience here doesn’t invalidate yours or any men here, I was chiming in to a relevant topic. But you telling me “so what? It happens to everyone!” Is exactly what I meant. It’s like guys here are so focused on how down bad they are, that they can’t even relate to women or like you, try to invalidate their comments.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/25 07:53 AM
7

Just a few questions to better understand the guys here: So you feel the same here when you try to bring up your issues? Instead of engaging with me, you decided to basically do the exact thing I mentioned, why do you feel like that was necessary?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 10:35 PM
65

Maybe the women here don’t say that but I’ve seen women admit they’re undateable all over Reddit. The thing about this sub is that it’s proven to be a hostile place for women’s thoughts and opinions. Anytime I’ve admitted that I don’t date because no one really wants me I always get pushback “you just want Chad!” “Open the app get 100 likes!” “Not true!” “You’ve rejected a bunch of nice guys!” “[something mean about me being ugly]” “All women get attention!” If a woman feels bad about being FA -…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 05:40 AM
6

At this point the age gap needs its own thread like the body count one. We get it guys, you want to only have sex with young women.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/25 05:35 PM
2

Because this discourse constantly ignores the nuances of single women. Guys seem to believe that the main reason an older women is still on the dating scene. It’s a generally harmful narrative that contributes to the ongoing gender wars.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 04:36 AM
2

Im sure some women do, but disproportionately people seem to have a lot of smoke for older women.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 04:33 AM
7

The perspective on older women here is honestly really disappointing. You all lament while throwing out unecessary barbs. “Before life humbles her” “Post-crisis” “what’s left of her” come on. These are simply women who have aged - all of a sudden they’re inundated with only negative traits. You can wax poetic but you’re firmly anchored in the idea that most, if not all women fucked on random exciting dick before they “settle” for you. Which negates all valid the reasons she could still be single…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/25 06:59 PM
2

For SOME women coffee dates are not good enough. Maybe they don’t like coffee/tea? Maybe they’re tired of going on coffee dates and want something more exciting? As humans there are many factors that determine why we do/don’t like things outside of money so for that to be a logical conclusion for you is interesting. If anything I feel like this would make it easier to gauge compatibility with some women. If you like coffee dates and she will never accept one then maybe ya’ll are not for each oth…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/25 06:22 PM
2

Why do ya’ll act like the average men are all these wonderfully altruistic humans who all mainly want long term relationships? Believe it or not tons of men see women as disposable means to easy sex, not just the top 10%. I feel like you turned the dial all the way from the woman are wonderful effect to the men are wonderful effect.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/25 11:15 AM
3

They are, they just insist on trying to convince everyone they’re altruistic in their attraction. You’re picky if you really sit and think about what you want and how many women meet that criteria.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/25 08:42 PM
1

For me it was just being facetious - which I believe we are allowed to do online? Is it against the purple pill debate rules? but it’s great there is statistical evidence!
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/25 08:40 PM
1

Idk why ya’ll gotta rely on insults because you don’t understand nuance in comments or general human conversation. It’s not a real stat you dolt, it’s a sarcastic statement. I know it’s hard to understand when someone is being facetious but you’ll get there champ!
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/25 11:48 AM
2

I wish that guys would truly grasp how few women they actually find attractive instead of trying to claim women are sooo very picky. If they wanted to be honest, it would absolutely be 3% of women (maybe 3.5% if we want to be generous).
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/25 11:27 AM
5

Very rarely. Attraction is also how someone carries themselves. I haven’t run into too many guys who carry themselves in an attractive way. I get what she’s saying when she talks to guys that she just doesn’t feel it. If you’re a pretty woman they’re barely trying to talk to you outside of flirting and innuendo. If you’re conventionally unattractive they’re flippant. Both of which are terribly unattractive. None of this means I haven’t seen cute men out and about though. The presence of a hot hu…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/25 11:23 AM
1

Hedonistic is a bit more negative than just enjoyable. It’s defined as “ engaged in the pursuit of pleasure ; sensually self indulgent”. That’s entirely untrue of majority of humans without kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 02:05 PM
6

I honestly feel like the simple answer is just to find a happy way to survive. The way I’ve observed is humans seem to need others or your mental and physical health take a toll. So we seek companionship - mainly in a spouse since societally we’re meant to be part of a union.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/25 11:52 PM
8

Why do you feel that we’re meant to “chase” anything? We exist with no clear mission or goal besides the ones you make up for yourself or societally want to hit. Logically makes no sense to cast judgement when you don’t know what the ultimate goal even is.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/25 11:44 PM
17

I think if you view a life without children as automatically hedonistic then idk if anyones answer could make sense to you. I find it odd that you think without kids people will only chase money and things. That they’re worth so little that they can only find pleasure in temporary things and be useful for meaningless sex. Just banished to a lifetime of nothing as if it hasn’t taken all types of humans to make up a society. As some who will not have a family - It’s actually kinda sad that anyone …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/25 11:30 PM
3

I already know I’m not good at interpersonal relationships but I really do not get matching then not talking. Just unmatch! When you get dry replies, do you keep trying for a bit or give up and move on?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/25 12:30 AM
2

Low effort conversations is my main issue. I get a match and try to chat - often it feels like annoying a very disinterested stranger. After so many of these interactions it’s just demoralizing. I think the women who are consistently on and off just get tired, leave and then try again after they forget how bad the experience was.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/25 12:08 AM
1

I don’t approach. I’m not super ugly but certainly not attractive enough to be that confident. I would prefer if he asked me out. To me it’s shows he’s actually interested. I like when a guy suggests a place and we can go back and forth from there. Im a big foodie and live in a large city so I welcome any new place suggested - even something as simple as coffee. I offer. It’s a pleasant surprise if they do pay. I’ve rarely had guys pay for me on dates. Absolute no - as you noted, to his house. A…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/25 03:58 PM
3

Sometimes I wonder what reality people here are referring to because I have literally never seen “sex recommendations” amongst people. What is this sex network of skilled operatives everyone seems to know about?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/25 01:21 AM
1

Most people don’t hang out with promiscuous people, just like you. It’s extremely rare to be in a friend group that passes around recommended men. I’ve actually never heard of this dynamic being common.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/25 01:19 AM
–

The way it was described was desperate enough to do her. I think the heat of passion type casual sex is fine (not for me personally, but I get it) vs. “I can’t find anyone else so that women I barely like over there will do”.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/25 12:15 AM
–

This is not rape OP. I don’t think you understand that women rarely get pleasure out of casual sex. Their partner doesn’t care to make sure they’re satisfied or it’s awkward because it’s the first time - therefore women are likely to be used to get off rather than be part of a mutually fulfilling moment. Why try to talk at women if you don’t fundamentally understand what sex is like for women?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/25 07:02 PM
–

But you didn’t mention romance at all. You only said being able to have sex anytime is a privilege. Sex and romance are not automatically tied together.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/25 06:55 PM
–

I just don’t see how having a random stranger have sex with you then discard you could possible mean loneliness is not a female issue. Women can be lonely without friends, family and genuine romantic connection. The way ya’ll reduce women to just sexual things is wild.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/25 06:52 PM
–

I feel like this is a bit of confirmation bias. It seems as though you are not dating with intention so you’re not being mindful about what you seek. Why do you keep attracting women who expect these things of you? What is common about these particular women that you keep going back to? I often find that when you just “hey they’re cute” or “eh, whatever I guess I’ll date” you gravitate towards people that don’t really work for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 02:06 AM
19

To YOU that’s toxic but nothing you listed is inherently harmful rhetoric. Shes splitting bills with you and hasn’t demanded you pay for anything - so at most she probably agrees that women can want to be wined and dined but knows she will not be treated that way. I also hate to break it to you that a good portion of women see age gap relationships as a least a little weird, we’ve always thought this, social media had nothing to do with it. You are not that much older than her - so that age gap …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 04:59 AM
1

It’s unfortunate it sort of derailed your main point. I completely understood what you were you’re coming from. I wish there could be more support so we can all better understand how to navigate being in this type of situation while seeing literally everyone else find romantic success.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/25 10:50 PM
1

Op I understand what you’re saying. I’m painfully awkward, pretty shy and have been single for years. Dating apps don’t work, being outside doesn’t work, no one pays me any attention and I’m not enough. I will likely never find anyone. It is what it is and it’s my own reality. But, I disagree we’re as disadvantaged as men. You’re also going to have a hard time making this claim both among men who can’t fathom these types of women and women who don’t get this type of experience. I think this is a…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/25 09:29 PM
10

Wait…you sincerely think people don’t say the same thing about women?!?! There’s entire terms for women who are single in their 30s - Cat lady. Spinster. Leftover Women. People automatically assume you’re mentally unstable. They deride you for not having kids. They remind you your time is up and your wrinkles are showing. There have been countless posts here discussing how terrible women are if they happen to be single and over 25. OP where do you exist?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/25 08:26 PM
26

I mean…yes. Lol. I don’t think a lot of straight guys consider how much straight women have to consider before being sexual with reckless abandon. One major consideration is pregnancy, something homosexual people never have to consider. Birth control can fail. Worrying for weeks if you’re pregnant with some random dudes child is nerve wracking. Abortions are still major procedures most want to avoid. None of this worry is worth the often mediocre sex that comes with a casual hookup.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/25 07:39 PM
5

It’s also a bit annoying that “dear god! Any sex will do!!!” narrative is prevalent. Do these guys not at all want good sex? Sex with someone who they’re actually interested in? Sex with connection?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/25 04:53 PM
4

You’re not meant to get as much engagement as you want though. The only reason women get so many likes is because of your “swipe on everything” method. If guys were just as discerning as women have to be, we’d get A LOT less likes and hopefully better intro messages. I think this suicide swipe is also actually driving women away from the apps. We all know these are not interested men, and now we have to wade through a bunch of guys who would have never matched with us had they lingered on our pr…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/25 04:44 PM
–

Isn’t the usual end result we’re told is that women will end up alone? Is that so bad, especially considering that’s there’s more women than men?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/25 02:53 AM
6

Often here, I feel like people are coming from their hypothetical of how much they would enjoy casual sex. In reality it’s often awkward, sometimes unfulfilling, tiring. I couldn’t imagine having that much fun constantly trying to find new people to have sex with.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/25 09:27 PM
1

This is a really great point. To the orgasm gap - why would I seek out an experience that will most likely be mediocre?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/25 09:21 PM
4

I haven’t dated in like a couple years but when I did, I messaged almost every guy I liked. If I knew he was out of my league and wouldn’t talk to me, I’d just send a like. Yep, most are either a friendly greeting or related to their profile. I’m not super proactive usually. I tend to respond to the men that have already liked me since I’m a little insecure and need that confirmation before communicating.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/25 11:49 PM
6

I think it’s a little bit of 1. When I was online dating I’d throw a couple likes to men who were out of my league. You never know if (for whatever reason) you’ll connect. If not, oh well - nothing is going to happen. I don’t think it’s 2 or 3. If you have something that could be considered unappealing (fat, ugly, sometimes certain ethnicity) you usually do not find ways to open yourself up to ridicule or rejection. Nor do you want a guy to pity match with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/25 11:02 PM
10

The cope from guys on this thread is crazy. This is how I know this sub isn’t rooted in reality.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 05:36 PM
3

The general issue is that as you get older, people want stability. Unfortunately, a part time position does not offer that, there would be a constant financial burden on the both of them. If he continues to have this part time job then that means no retirement savings, no dinners, no vacations, no insurance - just survival. It’s rare to find a partner that wants to take on the financial burden for someone else indefinitely. If he was younger maybe that would be okay but going into your 30s, 40s,…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 05:29 PM
–

This. I’ve been romantically unsuccessfully my entire life so it’s not as I feel like those particular life milestones were within reach. You exist with an unhappiness that has lingered for your entire life that it’s just normal.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/25 12:53 AM
3

You make total sense and I appreciate your perspective and starting this conversation.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 08:33 PM
7

Is there going to be a significant cohort of single women? In most data I’ve seen recently there’s a percentage shift upwards not a major increase. I make up the portion who is unhappily forever single - but the thing is, I’ve always been unhappy. Being single is just the icing on the cake of an already terrible life. I say this because the impression that women who are older and single =automatically repressing unhappiness just doesn’t ring true. The general vibe is If you were already struggli…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 07:47 PM
–

Did you or I have any say in how the world we were born into is shaped? Why, in a system formed by prior humans would any of the long standing systems we have today be the fault of only women?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 06:29 PM
–

I agree here. I think the pressure put upon men for this frankly unimportant day is ridiculous.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 06:26 PM
–

For Valentine’s Day in particular, it would be extreme to admit that women are the cruel master forcing men to buy them gifts. I’m not speaking on anything else.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 06:25 PM
–

Sure. Valentine’s Day is not a commercial holiday. The history of the day has been erased and your perspective is correct.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 06:23 PM
–

Okay. You’ve escaped the matrix and have pure thought. Congrats.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 06:22 PM
–

I hope you figure out a successful way to actually talk to people. You have a terribly patronizing attitude and love to minimize others - but that’s expected of a day old troll. Be well, love.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 06:20 PM
–

Nope - not what I said. We are all influenced by society in some way, big or small - all of us.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 08:58 AM
–

You keep trying to get me to admit to your POV by constantly questioning me. I’ve explained myself and you did too - you’re not getting my point, yet I get yours but disagree. Now you’re asking if I have real life experience simply because I’m presenting a different point? I’m not understanding why you feel the need to do so. You are taking jabs which is frankly petty and childish of you. Often some commenters like to respond to posts in a bubble to discredit how the sub views women. This is one…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 08:48 AM
–

Yep - you too! I know we love to believe that no outside force influences anything we do but alas.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 08:40 AM
–

Please refrain from little jabs. It’s not needed to get your point across. Thanks! Some women do, why? Because they may see others getting that treatment, maybe they see an ad, maybe they want something. But what is influencing people to buy specifically on that day? Capitalist marketing. I’m speaking generally using this post and my collective information gained from being part of this sub. Plenty of comments do this. I sometimes use a topic to fold into a larger idea.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 07:23 AM
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Except we’re all conditioned by society to do things. You do a lot of things because society says you should. How do you know most women are demanding their partner buy them little trinkets? Could it just be everyone feels the pressure to adhere to this holiday? I’m trying to make the point that not every grievance in society is solely because of women.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 06:36 AM
–

Often posts like this rally against women as if we made the current system we live in. We were all most likely born after tradition just like ya’ll. It feels like you’re railing against us, as if we have to uproot society. Valentine’s Day has evolved into a purely consumer holiday fueled by companies like Hallmark. We all love to believe advertising doesn’t work but it’s absolutely influenced a lot of aspects of society. Starting with simply giving flowers in the 17th century. Due to capitalism,…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 03:46 AM
–

The after Valentine’s Day chocolate sales are always pretty good too!
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 03:33 AM
–

GIFTS?! Slow down princess!!
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 03:32 AM
2

I appreciate the breakdown. While I disagree on some of these are reasonable, it’s helpful to have a male perspective.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/25 03:55 AM
0

Like I noted. What men want may seem simple to you but to some women it’s not easy to “give it to them”.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/25 10:16 AM
1

How does the male perspective see it?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/25 10:15 AM
20

I think you already correctly defined what it means to not change for a man. Generally, it means to not lose yourself in trying to fit his idea of a “dream girl”. It doesn’t mean don’t evolve to be a better partner and human. Unbeknownst to men, we have been told how to appeal to men from a young age so when being told not to change we’re essentially trying not to “people please” even more than we already are. I find that some women push back on the expectations from men because to be real with …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/25 01:54 AM
5

I think you make really valid points. Also when all your friends are in a relationship and you’re single - you’re back to being pretty lonely. Even the best of friends splinter between single and in a relationship. But I think people saying “have a friend group!” are trying to work within your parameters in an unhelpful way. Basically - can’t find a romantic relationship? Maybe focus on developing friendships! Truth is - if you desire a romantic relationship but can’t find one, you can only make…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/25 02:23 AM
4

Wait, why are you harping on the term “out of your league”? It’s just a turn of phrase that most people already know. Do you get this upset at other colloquialisms?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/25 01:46 PM
4

I feel like ya’ll are expecting cited evidence to back up personal observations. Or, often I see one study twisted to either fit a certain narrative or misquoted to uphold a specific perspective. What you’re interpreting as “seeking validation” is literally just some woman sharing her experience, not knowing that you already have a very specific view of women.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/25 01:56 AM
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Okay so now we’re using a handful of people to fully represent all women? This doesn’t really negate that other women actually read bios and you still should have a good dating app profile anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/25 03:55 PM
0

But humans are reactive. If I telll you “all men are stupid”, you would already disengage because that’s a ludicrous statement. That’s how it comes across sometimes when guys criticize women. Why would I think you have anything truthful to say if you start off with a bombastic criticism?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/25 10:57 PM
2

I find that online, it’s usually the tone rather than the content. Often, when I see criticism about women that I identify as hating - it’s unnecessarily harsh, steeped in some sort of myth or a positive sentiment followed by putting down other women.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/25 08:15 PM
3

The intial experience isn’t euphoric and most realistic women are not so flattered that they all of a sudden believe they’re hot shit. I don’t understand why the overwhelming idea is “women being picky means they think they’re special”. You should be picky too? Why would you believe that you’re compatible with everyone?? The real reason women don’t like the app is being flooded with disinterested matches from men who swiped desperately and obviously do not like you, are immediately sexual, “hey”…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 10:26 PM
22

Hypergamy is not a main factor in why women are single though. Most likely they are opting out because dating is terrible, they are hurt or most likely would have been alone for various personal reasons. Already, I think your perspective on why women choose to be alone is a bit shakey. What I don’t get is your questions -Everyone lives constantly with the threat that their rights and freedoms will be challenged. Whenever this danger comes - we’ll all be in trouble, not just single women. Do you …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 12:46 PM
13

Well, to men it’s the same. They just don’t seem to clock that they too don’t find many women instantly attractive either. Women do assess attractiveness by getting to know men on a deeper level. That’s essentially the point of dating, to better understand personality. Women constantly give men whom they’re not instantly attracted to chances. If we realistically even look at how women swipe it’s often based on profile content. For a personal anecdote - when I swipe. I assess pictures then read t…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/25 11:09 PM
3

I am an average, older women. If I get likes there’s no follow up, I’m often part of the “desperate swipe to find a match” group. Not every woman gets attention. This is a life fact.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/25 09:19 PM
4

Filter lol. It’s wild how much attention ya’ll think women get.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/25 05:11 PM
6

I figure but I also wish that guys would just leave me alone if they don’t at all want to put in any effort right?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/25 04:46 PM
5

Fr, I always see posts here listing all these nice things that guys have to do when dating. Yet have rarely witnessed it irl.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/25 04:11 PM
6

I too don’t seem to understand how this question would have clarified my intial point? I’m saying that women were not presented with 2 choices upon birth - pursue higher education or forgo and be guaranteed support before and after they’re married. So why do you think we “put ourselves” into a bind?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/25 03:25 AM
3

As far as I understand, no.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/25 03:09 AM
6

Women en masse were not presented with 2 choices to either go to college to spite men or become a wife and mother. From high school BOTH men and women are told to pursue higher education. We did not “put ourselves” in this scenario, we were all told it would make life better for whatever future we decided.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/25 02:47 AM
11

This is the question I have too. All these companies are determined to implement ai to greatly reduce their workforce. If we believe that’s possible what happens with all these millions of people? What possibility do they have at a decent life?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/25 01:03 AM
–

It’s okay if you don’t! Just don’t call me an inferior product :(
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/24 03:49 AM
26

Exactly, they’ll coat their “truths” with mean little nicknames and cruel comments. It’s not informative, it’s just to lash out.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/24 04:11 AM
59

Apparently if you make it past 30 and are still single/didnt just die on your bday you’re inferior.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/24 12:47 AM
184

Yes, we get it. We know. But I’ve noticed that on top of telling women that no one wants them after 30, you throw out insults like “inferior product” (which was the term used before this was edited) or “undesirable” There was absolutely no need to even do that here. Why can’t guys make this point without adding an insult? Why are ya’ll so mad at women who simply just aged? It’s so unnecessarily hurtful, especially to women who may already be upset with aging.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/24 12:44 AM
–

Your honesty is working. But, you’re going to have a hard time finding women who are seeking anything short term. It’s going to take longer to get what you want. The ones trying to change your mind probably like you and hope that you would be open to long term instead.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/24 02:53 AM
2

I’m not into anything with an attractive stranger I don’t know this man! Lol. I’d argue that is it is about physical fulfillment but in different ways. Personally, I think women who don’t mind casual sex would be averse because of the likelihood the sex is bad. Bad sex is a waste of time and effort to reach absolutely no physical fulfillment. If good looks=automatic orgasms, maybe an attractive stranger would be ideal, but they don’t. (Of course there’s so many other risks but for now, I’m honin…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/24 05:19 PM
1

Yes - Of course! Most women have, at one point or another found the place. I’ve done that especially if it’s a place I’ve been wanting to try, it’s a favorite or I have good memories. Most women have paid - especially in this economy or if it’s a simple coffee date.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/24 07:14 PM
1

You’re throwing out this scenario as if dating is not a mutual effort, I’ve found places, ive carried conversation. Ya’ll go out with women who barely like you and complain as if your scenario is the truth. It’s not. You obviously don’t like the company of women and your inexperience is showing - it’s okay to be honest with yourself!
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/24 06:56 PM
-1

If you’re viewing simply hanging out with someone to determine further compatibility like this massive burden then I think dating is not for you. The only thing that’s ensured when you hang out with someone is that you hung out with someone. What more do you want? Her to do magic?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/24 06:09 PM
5

Personally yes. So - I’m someone who lives in a big city so I dress up when I go out, I’m also socialized to have random conversations and be generally open to strangers. Even with all this under my belt, I still have not been able to prompt interest. Of course I could be throwing off vibes I’m not aware of, but I also feel I have not run into many men who are actually interested.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/24 02:11 AM
4

I appreciate your perspective. But I do agree with her comment. Guys are not eagerly waiting for me to chat with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/24 01:53 AM
9

Yes! You’ve explained it so well. I feel like guys here have a strange impression that just by walking outside most women warrant attention and will get it when that’s just not the case. In my experience as a generally unremarkable person, men have shown absolutely very little interest.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/24 10:34 PM
2

On the men’s side a lot of comments just seem to turn it back around on women. Where’s all that accountability we’re always required to have?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/24 08:04 PM
14

You’re totally right. Im resigned, I’m no longer trying. But, I was not complaining about my circumstance rather explaining how it came to be. In rereading my statement it doesn’t read as a complaint, I already know what more I can do and admitted I’m not going to for various reasons. Rather I’m explaining that it’s frustrating for guys to assume the sole reasons a woman is single is because she’s rejecting gender roles or thinks she’s above her suitors rather than other factors.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/24 07:44 PM
14

I’m not going to speak on other women, so this is a personal anecdote. Personally, I am single because I’m boring, I don’t do much - I’m not outside, have 2 friends, I’m quiet and a little fucked up. I’m very average looking. When you don’t go outside much, life passes you by. That’s what happened to me. Externally, besides 2 minor relationships. Absolutely no one had shown interest in me. My entire life I’ve been around people already in relationships, I haven’t met another single person in dam…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/24 06:49 PM
19

Thank you for this. I find that there’s a lot of “oh! You silly little boss babes are now alone! Ya’ll missed all those opportunities to be housewives to great men but ya didn’t do it!! Gotcha!” I’m in a similar boat as you, it just didn’t happen. There’s no “independent woman, I hate men narrative” - just bad luck and maybe low self esteem and now I’m old and it doesn’t feel like it’s going to happen.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/24 03:09 PM
-1

Exactly. Very few women are out here judging men on this metric. I wish there was a new study so guys stop latching onto this one.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 01:19 PM
3

Marriage is often practical though. In the U.S. especially there are certain tax benefits, you can put your spouse on your insurance, and a million other benefits im forgetting. It’s not “sane” but a lot of things we do in modern society are willfully against anything “natural”. People often get married to begin to share those benefits not necessarily because they’re in a teenage love phase. Additionally, there are also prenups to avoid financial pitfalls. Divorces are not always bitter custody …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/24 11:14 AM
6

Yeah, I absolutely agree as an older catless cat lady. I wish guys would stop lumping us in with women who just have high standards and won’t settle for all those amazing guys who are lining up at their door. When you’re awkward,ugly, or mentally ill, dating was never viable and then you find that you’ve aged out and now what was already hard is now impossible.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/24 04:08 PM
–

I can’t get over the general logic here. Since a woman has hooked up she should no longer seek a long term loving relationship - she is no longer worthy of that type of love. She can only hope to hookup forever and ever. So then why are you contributing to “tarnishing” a bunch of women forever?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/24 08:02 AM
33

I think you’re right. generally people tend to want to look good to fit into society. So they’re doing it to feel accepted - which can be interpreted as “doing it for yourself”. But it’s not always meant to be a sign to the opposite sex that I tried specifically to get your attention. That’s where women and men sometimes don’t see eye to eye. If I wear a dress that flatters my figure and I look pretty sexy - it’s most likely to adhere to a trend, accentuate my body to be seen as stylish rather t…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/12/24 08:23 AM
–

I think it’s 2 things. 1 - whomever you’re talking to doesn’t want to put someone down nor were they asking you to. Noting someone’s weight, age, etc. is useless, they know, we know - everyone is aware. There’s no need to remind them that they most likely looked better younger - there’s nothing they can do about it and at worst they’ll feel bad. 2 - we compliment not based on fuckabillity. We do not see our friends and peers in terms of if we’d date them. We are complimenting the effort they too…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/24 06:10 PM
10

I wouldn’t say I hate men but I’m not dating ever, so maybe that’s close. Beauty standards are engrained in society and have been around before many of us were even born. At this point those beauty standards feel more like a societal norm rather than a standard made up by men. For example, even though I most likely will never date and therefore don’t consider how I appear to men, I still deeply consider what looks good on me both because I want to flatter my body and to fit into general society.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/24 07:31 AM
1

Thank you for the teenage woe is I view on life. It’s wild that you’ve taken it this far based on a general simple statement. I don’t need you to preach at me because I think you’re not worth listening to. But thanks! I hope you have a lovely day!
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/24 10:01 PM
3

Great. Thanks for the input.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/24 09:59 PM
3

Don’t tell a grown person to grow up because you have a nihilistic view on life you misinterpret as correct. You’re bordering on being nasty which isn’t necessary in a debate. But considering that you are the type of person who thinks the way you do I’m not surprised you’re moving towards personal insults.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/24 07:38 PM
2

Humanity’s reality is not “be mean to ugly women”. Maybe you base your reality off of some antiquated theory that doesn’t work for today’s society,
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/24 06:35 PM
3

See. This is the issue. It’s not. Being disgusted by strangers because they don’t meet your attractiveness threshold is honestly really messed up.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/24 05:09 PM
3

In regards to OP and the commenter that I responded to - this topic is about how guys act. When it’s brought up that guys treat women they find unattractive badly, everyone is so quick to want to give a handful of examples of girls being mean to their friend that one time. We’re referring to the general phenomenon of a lot of guys treating women badly instead of just generally neutral.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/24 05:07 PM
15

All of this is incredibly true. I feel like the guys here would like everyone to believe that being disgusted by women you don’t find attractive is on the same level as being simply neutral.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/24 01:43 AM
0

Ya’ll have such a skewed perspective on the average woman that paints them as the delusional super villain in your dating story. It’s a little scary how completely incorrect this entire post is, it’s almost like you’ve never actual interacted with a women at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/24 03:48 AM
22

This cannot be serious lol. It’s so interesting that the perception is the only reason a woman is alone is because she didn’t settle for the endless suitors who are knocking down her door. Dating is not as easy as plucking up any man and having him help pay your bills. Like what??
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/24 03:51 AM
0

A rant on the topic of walks for dates. Some people love to do walking dates in nyc because there’s a lot happening but…man do I hate them. Yes, there’s a lot to look at but maneuvering through people while trying to talk, brisk, windy weather, the general aimlessness - is just not my cup of tea. But I digress - personally, I think a major issue that leads to everything she experienced is that there are so many interesting people, of every age in large cities. Most who are dating have the “well …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/24 08:33 PM
1

Could it be that she sensed you weren’t that interested and just stopped “pursuing” you?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/11/24 05:19 PM
1

You don’t - you lower your standards when you realize that you won’t get the woman you want. But that doesn’t mean that you happily lowered them. Guys sadly and with very little effort go for the ugly ones with hopes they’ll sleep with or as a Hail Mary for their self esteem. Guys act a lot like what they accuse women of doing. Those ugly women mainly reject them either because the women have self esteem issues or they can see that these guys are disingenuous and obviously do not like them. Idk …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/24 06:41 PM
1

Men also go for the most attractive women and when that doesn’t work just begrudgingly match with ugly women. Maybe you’re okay with your matches not at all putting in any effort for conversation, making it known you’re not their type and other cues that they’re disinterested. You’re also not giving most woman with a cool personality but average/ugly looks a chance either. But guys seem to think that because they desperately swiped right on every single woman, that’s actually a good metric of “a…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/24 06:26 PM
1

I think it’s comparable for women in that if you don’t take good pictures, you’re ugly and boring and don’t know how to sell yourself due to a static picture and some “interesting” witty quips, you’re also not going to get much out of it either. That’s why women leave the apps a lot, Tons of women are overlooked. The set up doesn’t work for most women on either level either.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/24 07:54 PM
4

Okay…does that mean that I can’t share my experiences? Enlighten me on why you felt the need to disregard me to what? We’ve both been disrespected, now what?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/11/24 07:51 AM
12

Yeah that’s happened to me. I was cordial with a guy in a bar, absolutely no intentions just being social and he loudly exclaimed to his friends “yeh, I would never go out with a black girl”. I wasn’t devastated but it was incredibly unnecessary.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 08:59 PM
5

I don’t mean like actively “oh no I’m in danger” uncomfortable but a “I really don’t want to be in the conversation” thing. That’s happened to me in my attempts to flirt so I’m very aware when I get that energy. I do openly compliment both men and women but it’s very platonic.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 08:57 PM
3

Well, I don’t approach - I can objectively say that I’m not attractive so I don’t bother. Not sure what my attractive level is and at this point I don’t have the energy to figure it out. If I was younger I’d try though.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 08:48 PM
1

So the goal is not only to quarantine (which is already an effective because these groups are shamed and often less desired) but for them to completely disappear, like die?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 12:37 PM
13

Haha I appreciate it, I know that sounds depressing af but I just wanted to throw my perspective out there.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 07:29 AM
1

So these women are pushed out of the herd but why bully them also? For example, guys will see a woman opt out of dating and still come for them even though they’ve already removed themselves. Or they’ll see a woman they’re not going to date and be cruel. If these women are already out of your herd why then even bother with them?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 07:28 AM
44

For me, it’s that I’m not really attractive so to assume some random guy likes me is laughable. Often guys feels uncomfy when an unattractive women even lightly flirts so I wouldn’t want to put anyone in that position. Additionally everyone out and about seems to be taken so even if I had a wild idea to approach, there’s not point. The only scenario I’d try to reach out first is the apps but that would still be after we matched. But I wouldn’t continue to try if the conversation is dry and often…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/24 06:52 AM
–

I think there’s an implication here that the friend in question is delusional and doesn’t already know what the issue is. Speaking personally, most women already have a good grasp on their flaws, both physical and mental - especially as we get older. Often we know not to double down. Our friend knows she’s “fat/insecure/weird/ugly/etc…” there’s no need to point it out. We already know they’re either working on it or not. We may allude to that being the issue but sometimes we’re more subtle in ou…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 06:06 PM
3

Neutral is well though. We’re all treated neutrally by strangers who “actively ignore”. Meaning they don’t invade your space, they don’t make others uncomfortable, they don’t make weird unecessary comments, etc. That is my version of well. It’s a shame guys have a such a twisted way of viewing something being neutral.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 05:54 PM
0

Society tells certain women they’re perfect. Everyone else. No. The issue here is that guys only envision a very specific women when they go on about how they get special treatment. With lived experience of me, friends and countless women we can tell that’s not the case. Yes - men should treat women as neutral as possible but they do not. Either they romanticize hot women or treat women they don’t find attractive rudely or at worst with pure disgust. Neutral also equals well. You don’t not have …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 03:45 PM
2

The reason society protects women is because of how harsh, and unrelenting men are when it comes to women who are not their type. While I agree that women do this we still need to acknowledge that men are just as vicious. I feel like guys here pretend as if they treat women well - yall don’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 03:11 PM
1

This post makes so much sense yet people are doing mental gymanstics in the struggle Olympics to disregard a simple point. Men treat women they’re not attracted to like crap instead of simply being neutral. They go out of their way to be unkind because they think those women shouldn’t even exist to curse their eyesight. It’s weird.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/24 01:41 PM
10

This is an interesting analysis. While there is some truth to this, i don’t think it’s a lot of women. A large percentage of women still get married. I’d argue that those who have opted out of dating now just have a platform for their thoughts that can reach a wide me audience than just immediate family and friends, but the amount of single women is not drastically increasing. While I think slightly more women will remain single (both happily and unhappily), I don’t think it’s a huge societal sh…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/24 06:47 PM
1

Because being single for a bit until you find someone you absolutely like is unthinkable. It’s wild that these guys don’t realize that finding someone you like in a sea of women you don’t like won’t be easy and may take a very long time.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/24 05:55 PM
2

Due to your promiscuity and bad ways you’re going to do what the good virgin girls don’t…age!! Ah so scurrry!!
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/24 05:50 PM
1

It’s the illusion that they refuse to drop that all women want 6 ft, 6 figure, 6 pack abs. But instead of considering that maybe they’re should go for a normal woman they insist this is the metric all women subscribe to.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/24 05:48 PM
5

For me, never. I’m like “oh they’re cute” or “ they look great (meaning the fashion is on point or their hair looks nice or whatever) but that doesn’t will me to interact with them. 2 things with me - (1) I don’t flirt with people who haven’t given me any very obvious signs. If we’re not engaged in conversation already then he’s not interested. (2) I’m not attractive nor that remarkable myself - so I just assume the default that no one is interested, especially some attractive guy - so why bothe…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/24 02:33 PM
-1

Idk much about the Korean original movement but I noted on another sub that this is just like a bad American reboot or a beloved foreign show. It’s a badly put together talking point with no clear idea on why it was even “remade” here. I think your analysis here is spot on - it’s just frustrating that women who already decided to quietly decenter men or remain single for whatever reason are swept up into yet another thing that brings more criticism to their lives.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/24 09:41 PM
–

This is one of the posts I actually agree with here lol. It’s not going to catch on. The women who are for it were already engaging in that type of lifestyle and there are some women who absolutely need sex and relationships who really can’t hold out for long. For now it’s a good idea since tensions are high but I really don’t think it’s be a substantial movement.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/24 02:10 AM
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This is one of the posts I actually agree with here lol. It’s not going to catch on. The women who are for it were already engaging in that type of lifestyle and there are some women who absolutely need sex and relationships who really can’t hold out for long. For now it’s a good idea since tensions are high but I really don’t think it’s be a substantial movement.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/24 01:39 AM
13

I think you’re maybe a victim of a very specific algorithm because I really do not think there’s a lot of complaining on this topic. At this point in society most humans realize that if they were in danger, it’s rare to be helped. That’s why when someone does help, the victim is usually very grateful. While I agree you are not obligated to step in to protect anyone - I just don’t think the main reason should be “oh maybe she’s a feminist” - that’s just…weird. If you had said something like “well…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/24 09:45 PM
1

You realize you don’t have to pursue women you so obviously don’t like right? It’s like you assume those post wall single mothers will be happily waiting around for a man who hates them.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/24 02:35 AM
7

3 thoughts come to me with this You noted that life has tradeoffs - why do you think that women don’t already understand? We’ve been told since birth about what our lives should be and often told how much of a failure we are if we don’t become a wife. I can’t help but feel like this is yet another analysis purely to punch down on “post wall women”. A lot of women don’t even want it all. They instead focus their energy towards what they seek. For example a woman can have a job, but not necessaril…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/24 06:41 PM
1

I’m baffled as to how you guys love to twist anything women here say? What is the general issue with reevaluating how you approach? My intial point was that a “hello” may get you ignored. But a * hello, how are you? * hey, [quick reference to the matches profile] * hey, how was your weekend? * hey [insert any human formality know to man]” * hey! [compliment] Could work better and move the conversation forward. Why is this very basic statement being picked apart?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 06:40 PM
1

I acknowledged that saying hello is fine, but adding something quick is also basic conversation. For example, to a coworker “hey, how are you?” “How was your weekend?”. Same applies to strangers. That’s not sweeping someone off their feet or a whole paragraph. I feel like you misunderstood me entirely.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 06:36 PM
1

You noted a specific scenario in which you would message first. My response is very basic. It’s how almost everyone navigates the apps. It’s just communication. I cited that I wasn’t attractive so no, I can’t sit and wait. I usually do what I just said. Scan their profile and start with whatever I see. If there’s nothing then sometimes I don’t match because I don’t know what to say or I try out a generic, friendly greeting that is certainly a little more than just “hello”. Apparently I don’t des…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 06:00 PM
1

Wanting more than just “hi” isn’t picky. Lmao. I really thought you wanted actual feedback but alas - I should have just not engaged like OP. She clocked you, so well.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 04:44 PM
1

Sure, a simple “hello” is customary but most likely will get you ignored. I’m only speaking as a not super attractive women and when I sift through matches the “heys” usually get passed on unless there’s something that catches my interest on their profile. I usually like something a little more specific to my profile. For example if I mention movies start off with something related. That shows me that you didn’t just swipe yes on every girl, that you actually atleast skimmed my profile and actua…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 04:20 PM
4

I think we all live in our own online bubbles. Since I’m hopelessly single, my algorithm feeds me women who are struggling with dating all trying to find ways to be better. They’re working out, trying to fix their communication, figuring out ways to best appeal to men, doing things to “think like a wife”. Especially if you’re a woman who’s been single for a long time, people will tell you everything that you’re doing wrong or need to fix. We don’t need the advice - it’s already in plain sight wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/24 05:28 PM
9

I know we hate personal examples here but I don’t know any other type of woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/24 11:37 PM
6

Guys here live in universe where they think their single income could support whatever young woman they’re lusting after. If a woman has a job suddenly she’s a “girl boss” and not just an adult with a job. By having a job she’s not fulfilling her inborn woman duties and wasting her time. So of course you very logically saying that most humans need to make money to live independently is triggering and now you’re inundated with insults and what ifs. You made sense, this just isn’t the place,
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/24 08:09 PM
9

If a women simply has a job to survive, is not accepting government help or help from some guy in her life - what are they being handed?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/24 08:03 PM
1

I always have to remind myself that the guys here are only thinking about certain women when they say all these things because the mindset here regarding women’s dating success is so foreign to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/24 02:40 AM
2

Everytime this topic I brought up, I find the replies from guys so fascinating. This is absolutely true, but ya’ll bend over backwards with invalid points to disprove lived experiences. Seems like the empathy guys want from women is not something they’re willing to give to women who are struggling.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/24 02:34 AM
1

Why are the categories so rigid? Can we throw in a third category featuring the huge swath of women who are somewhere in between? They work just to get by but their goals are family and there’s a household partnership? Or what about the women who just have a job but they’re certainly not boss babes?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/24 02:26 AM
2

Idk if this would fall in any category but idk who’s taken, nor do I feel like figuring it out. If you’re a minority woman you have to quickly determine if you’re even his type otherwise they could be really nasty to you.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/24 06:37 PM
1

This is such an interesting perspective from a guy who thinks all women are desired. For average/ugly women we already know where we stand and have realistic expectations. So to use women’s expectations as a major factor why dating sucks just feels really false. If anything a major issue I’ve encountered is that the average men as so upset they have to date average/ugly women then end up treating them like crap. Why constantly use the experiences of very attractive, skinny, wanted women to dicta…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/24 08:19 PM
–

This is an interesting dichotomy. Theyre simultaneously trying to tell women over 30 to pack it up and never date again yet turn around and make fun of them when they chose to do just that. Guys seem to want women to blip off the earth if they’re single after 30.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/24 12:10 AM
6

It’s interesting to see the denial after countless posts lamenting about older women both in and out of the dating pool. Parts of OPs statement is 100% true so this fake pearl clutching is silly. For all the call of accountability - I see none here.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/24 04:43 PM
4

I feel similar - I haven’t had good interactions with guys so I can’t even begin to imagine what a positive role they could possibly have in my life. It’s great that some women get to experience such kindness but it’s very foreign to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/24 04:37 AM
1

I agree with you. In the few times I’ve been approached they were respectful, friendly and just as nervous as I was (I’m insanely awkward so figuring out how to talk to someone is always a gamble). I think the vocal minority are not clarifying their stance well enough. Women usually do not like to be approached when they indicate clear signs they want to be alone (head phones, deep in a book) or from obviously creepy or overly drunk guys. A casual flirty conversation is not an awful experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/24 09:20 PM
1

There’s a forever alone women forum, I’ve seen countless posts from women across various forums lamenting about being single and weird, there are YouTube videos about femcels, even documentaries. They’re not as common because people will gleefully make fun of a bunch of “unattractive women” often making them keep their loneliness to themselves. It’s incredibly odd for you to believe these women don’t exist. I’m literally saying I’m one of them and there are billions of people on earth. You don’t…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/24 06:29 AM
2

Right -I keep forgetting the mindset here. That’s why there’s such an insistence that women that don’t have male attention even exist.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/24 12:18 AM
1

I mean I’m technically a femcel. I’m boring and weird, not super attractive. To deny that they exist is just the same willful ignorance you accuse women of. Everyone will not have a partner - it’s possible for women to be alone and undesired.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/24 12:07 AM
2

I mean there are a lot of maladjusted women, saying they’re a minority is skewing your data. You just don’t see them so you think they’re not a factor. I’d argue that women are not en masse looking down on men or have unrealistic expectations. It’s simply just hard to find each other with all these faux choices in the way. For both parties it’s like the market is flooded with either apartments out of your price range or completely unlivable spots and you’re just trying to find a reasonable place…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/24 10:13 PM
1

This sub loves to ignore women who are ugly, awkward, or generally undesirable. It’s not always some haughty woman looking down upon her options. The illusion of choice is quickly broken, and plenty of women have already accepted the reality that they either have no choice, cannot find who likes them back or just give up the search because they don’t feel like a catch. The incorrect mindset ya’ll have towards women is at the crux of most debates here.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/24 10:03 PM
3

It’s very interesting how convinced people are that sex robots are going to be fully able to supplement for a relationship in our lifetimes. Currently robots to actually help people do tasks has been hit or miss since robots have yet to capture organic movements or road blocks to be of assistance. At most we’ll see advanced flesh-lights or those full body sex dolls but not this beautiful ai powered humanoid sex bot that OP seems to want.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/24 01:56 AM
11

I don’t mean to not put yourself out there. I’m saying that advice is not always helpful. OP mentioned that one can go out every night for 5 years and meet no one or you could meet someone getting out of a taxi. I’m just emphasizing that to be in the same room as someone who actually wants to date you is very much luck rather than exposure.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/24 02:00 PM
50

I truly believe luck is a major factor as well. This is why I really don’t think many people in relationships can give advice on how to get into one. They will always have stories of meeting g someone at work, through friends, at a club or grocery shopping and chalk it up to them “putting themselves out there”. But in reality it was lucky that they happened to be in the same room as someone who thought you were attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/24 09:17 AM
–

Men are so rarely empathetic towards lonely women. Most vehemently deny she can even feel as lonely as them, totally downplay their feelings or try to make her feel bad for being alone.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/24 07:30 PM
2

Yep! That’s why I take everything here with a grain of salt. Obviously only a certain type of women is being referenced here.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/24 05:01 AM
2

Do you still have the gf?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/24 01:21 AM
–

Single mixers are the final “well maybe this will work” for desperate single women. Wym?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/24 05:56 PM
-1

I mean, at 40 would I want an ice cream or coffee date? Not really. Maybe as a younger person, thats nice but as you get older it is considered low effort. Ice cream/coffee requires little to no thought unless there’s a specific tie (favorite ice cream shop, I love this place, etc.) In life there are so many interesting experiences you can suggest. People are looking for others who have some sort of zeal for life and actual excitement to get to know them. Just shrugging your shoulders and being …
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/24 06:24 PM
–

Oh I know, but I was just highlighting the issues that some women do have when it comes to dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/24 08:02 PM
–

Oh Sorry! I meant no point in me responding to the post** I appreciate your responses. You’re not invalidating at all. To explain a little - it’s my own insecurities mixed with the fact that I’m unattractive. I am black. So that stops me from dating in general.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/24 07:59 PM
–

Exactly. I get there’s no point in responding here since it’s hard to shake others perception but I hope at-least some other woman relates.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/24 05:54 PM
–

OP said it doesn’t suck for women at all. I know it sucks more for men. But that doesn’t mean it’s great for women.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/24 05:30 PM
–

I when I was on the apps, the likes were a okay but it was obvious they were pity swipes (guys who swipe right on everyone). I don’t know how to sell myself, I don’t take good pics. I had very little success. Irl, there’s no interest. I’ve never been approached nor do I expect it anyway. This is a reality for a lot of ugly/average women.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/24 05:27 PM
–

The online dating market is crap because everyone is being rejected over and over again. That burns people out, wrecks their self esteem and makes dating a chore rather than a fun experience. If you are not very attractive, take good pics, have a classic “hey I’m fun” bio - you’re not going to have a good time. This applies for both women and men. This dream world where ya’ll think all women have tons of valid options just waiting at their door for them to say yes is not living in reality.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/24 02:54 AM
3

Me: Women are not loose because they’re single after a certain age You (for some reason): “lulz wats your body count huh? Huh? Random person tell me! Har har, see you won’t tell me, you lose!” If you have a valid rebuttal besides thinking you owned me real good or trolling or whatever this is please bring it forth otherwise I don’t see what you have to gain here.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/24 03:14 AM
3

You’re on some bullshit trying to bait me into a totally different conversation because you have the maturity of a child. You’re the issue and you’re a fool for believing this. I hate having conversations with humans like you, it’s frustrating to believe people like you are out here.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/24 03:01 AM
3

Nah, that’s not the point we’re trying to make here and I’m bored of guys trying to bait women into a back a forth here. It’s an absolutely silly perspective to think that just because you’re single past a certain age you’re busy being dicked down. That’s weird af.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/24 02:58 AM
3

If you really think the majority single women in their 30s has been with A LOT of men then you’re beyond reasoning.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/24 02:56 AM
0

I wish guys would stop generalizing that single women in their 30s have slept around. It’s a really insidious myth based on literally nothing but guys imaginations.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/24 10:21 PM
0

We have a silent social contract & “life subscription” in the form of forever taxes. Essentially we’re already born into a system in which it’s a given that we are granted a bit of respect to continue existing relatively normally (of course there’s a lot of nuance but I’m taking general) So unless you’re going to withdraw yourself from society, arguably respect is all that’s asked of you. You don’t need to love, you don’t need to maintain friendships, you don’t need to put in the effort to court…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/24 12:07 AM
5

However those are not the only ones getting this type of hate. Even women who admit they struggle due to their own struggles, self esteem or mental illness are catching strays and comments are always packed with guys gleefully making fun of her.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/24 02:28 AM
2

I totally agree with you. I’m sorry - I didn’t mean to silence you at all. I think in this sub especially it’s disheartening as the generally lonely single women to read how downright cruel these guys are. Idk what this sub was in the past but for now it’s an echo chamber.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/24 02:21 AM
5

As usual whenever the idea that a woman has issues in dating in brought up here, OP is talked down, the commenters prove her point and yet again they’re villanized. This thread is the perfect example of what you’re saying OP. Women are not even allowed to be flawed or human in anyway. Personally, I think women shouldnt even bring up single women in this sub. It’s just another place for the internet to shit on them for simply existing.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/24 01:56 AM
3

Ya’ll really have oddly skewed perspective on like everything having to do with women. The general disdain you have for women who are outside of your “attraction lenses” just exudes from this post. Anyway - we know that’s not a positive phrase. We know it means men think so little of us that they’d gladly use women they are not attracted to as temporary horny relief but actually treat the ones they like better. That’s the point of the phrase, so that women think critically before falling for som…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/24 09:39 PM
5

Maybe you are a caring lover and nice person but a lot of guys who have ONS barely give a fuck. Therefore the experience is as she explained. I don’t think she’s saying a lot of women feel this way but it’s not entirely impossible that this is a valid experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/24 09:09 PM
3

I generally agree with you OP. The risks often outweigh the benefits when it comes to causal sex. I generally don’t consider it’s a privilege that some guy who barely likes me wants to offer me mediocre sex and I get to worry about STDs, pregnancy, BV and general unpleasantness. When sex is great that awesome but a lot of sex simply isn’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/24 09:05 PM
–

Omg thank you!! I now fully understand the concept, thanks for explaining to me. I would have been lost otherwise.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/24 05:53 AM
–

Yep, that’s true as well. That still doesn’t disprove my point that not all women can get into LTR easily nor solve me being single.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/24 11:45 PM
–

Sure, that’s true, also other issues. But what’s not true is the narrative that every. single. woman can easily get into a relationship and if they can’t or don’t want to they’re below average. But that’s not gonna work here.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/24 11:16 PM
–

Yes, it is me. So wouldn’t that mean that it’s not easy for all average women then?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/24 10:58 PM
–

I wish I lived in this reality when I haven’t been single for years and guys are so excited to be in an LTR with me.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/24 08:22 PM
–

From an average POC women - No. While it’s true I get matches, they consist of: guys who swiped right on every women and are not interested in me, low effort asks for sex, going nowhere conversations and men who are mad they could only match with me. If I want to tank my self esteem during a rare moment I think love is still out there I hop on the apps.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/24 08:21 PM
–

Idk how you see the cumulative comments and this is your conclusion. Countless women here have stated they enjoy safe sex within a relationship. If anything I’ve seen more women here say they don’t really do casual.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/24 08:17 PM
5

I feel like women already know that as they age there’s less interest AND more people are already coupled up…So what’s the point of this post? what do you suggest to those who have already aged? Is this just to warn young women to…not age? How do you “move accordingly” when it comes to aging? I think a lot of women already listen to men so either they opt out of dating after a certain age or just keep on trying.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/24 08:12 PM
–

This is why I have no issue with filters on apps. If people really don’t want someone fat, or POC or whatever it’s best they don’t even have the chance to interact.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/24 06:11 PM
7

I would LOVE to eliminate the desire. I feel as if I will never find someone, I’ve felt it since I was a kid so it would be great to not desire something I obviously cannot attain.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/24 12:18 AM
–

Can we add the women who aren’t dating/choose to be single to the mix? That could also be throwing off the ratio.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/24 06:01 PM
5

Also I’ve seen guys admit that they would just sleep with women they didn’t find attractive just to “scratch the itch” so even if I approach there’s no guarantee that he’ll be honest about actually being interested. What’s the point?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/24 03:30 AM
–

Every topic is traced back to “well it’s women’s fault because they’re ugly/old/entitled”. Or that there’s a constant call for women to take “accountability” for whatever a mean women did to them in the past. The vitriol that they spew to any women they think is unattractive, heavy emphasis on single moms. This is a male space and sometimes women chime in. It’s fascinating though, that’s what makes me check in.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/24 08:44 PM
1

Within your equation where would you factor in the percentage of humans that’s don’t view sex as transactional? That’s a large variable to this equation. I hate to view it this way, but what about the cost ratio? A dinner is not the same price as access to a human body in most cases. Unless you’re shelling out $200-$1000 (or more) for this meal you’re not paying the equivalent for any sexual activities.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/24 08:03 PM
4

Yehhhh to me, breaking dow relationships like this is such a scary way to think about human beings. To make something that should involve emotions so rigid and scientific is wild.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/24 08:00 PM
–

I hear what you’re saying, I see the people around me seemingly having consistent loving relationships with sex, intimacy, whatever and it feels very out of reach.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/24 09:07 PM
–

Thank you!! This is a great breakdown.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/24 07:48 PM
–

I wish that wasn’t so ingrained in these people’s mindsets. But if you only view women a certain way it may be impossible for them to get it.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/24 07:45 PM
–

Well no, women can’t get a relationship as easy as sex. If that was the case then I’d be married. I’ve been single for years so I can absolutely imagine literally no one being interested. I anticipate an entire life without that, it sucks but that’s just how it will be. “I should be able to have sex at any point even if I put in no effort because some woman should automatically locate me, and hand me all the things I need from them” that’s how this sounds anytime I hear it, that’s why this point…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/24 07:42 PM
1

How does this concept factor in cultural, regional, general differences? Just different versions of the same looking man?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/24 06:33 PM
16

I wish people realized how much luck it takes to meet someone you’re compatible with. We take it for granted because most people find relationships but it really is purely luck.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/24 06:26 PM
2

Right, it’s hard out here. I don’t even date anymore.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/24 03:08 AM
0

Expand on what’s unreasonable about my summary of his points. At the root of this is “women over 30 are not valuable”, correct? What more can be expanded from that POV?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/24 08:38 PM
–

I’m not saying guys should stop but pretending to be nice, caring, romantic men but only for those they deem “valuable” just feels wrong to me. But I don’t date so essentially doesn’t affect me.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/24 07:50 PM
6

Just yesterday multiple people here argued that women past 30 offer absolutely nothing and are no longer worthy of love. So if age immediately disqualifies you, then honestly what is the point?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/24 06:37 PM
12

Right, it’s up to him to properly vet women instead of using those on the path to “the worthy perfect one”
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/24 06:30 PM
3

I’m not shaming you, I’m simplifying your points and you’re doubling down. I get it. Godspeed.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/24 02:36 AM
4

I mean I’ve already clocked you as someone who devalues humans who naturally age. I already think you and people who think like this are bad people. But I’ve learned you have to always atleast hear other people out even if you don’t respect them. So, you said your piece. You don’t care. Coolio.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/24 02:16 AM
4

Yep, they should give up because love is no longer possible with age. Totally got it.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/24 02:10 AM
3

Okay so women who are 30+ should never expect anyone to love or like them for the rest of their lifespan. Noted.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/24 12:57 AM
3

Makes total sense. My comment was in reaction to this post and others that give the impression that women are automatically worthless if they dare to age.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/24 12:34 AM
2

Alright, so you agree that women over 30 are worthless. Gotcha. Thanks for your input.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/24 11:39 PM
1

Okay so you agree with OP’s general point that that millions of women above 30 have aged out of being loved or even liked and only worth settling for. Well, do you.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/24 10:33 PM
0

I’m in agreement with you, i understand it’s a general fact that men do go for younger women. My overall point was that this sub treats women over 30 as if they lose everything and morph into swamp witches who are undateable.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/24 10:31 PM
2

Where did OP mention childbearing? Did OP not specifically ask about 30-40 years olds? Reading is fundamental.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/24 10:09 PM
-1

Okay so if biology is so black and white none of the millions of women past 30 would date, find anyone, men would divorce them the minute they turn 30 because we can’t help our biology right? Also OP is specifically talking about 30-40 year olds. We already know ya’ll are obsessed with young women to the point that ya’ll will use every study to prove that it’s impossible for women in her 30s to actually be liked.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/24 10:08 PM
12

It’s wild how ya’ll see women over 30 as totally worthless. Women in their 30s/40s are not just sad things to settle for if you can’t get increasingly younger women.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/24 08:58 PM
4

I’m not going to go into details because I don’t want this to turn into “bash all men”. For me guys have been generally dismissive, mean & rude. This is why I disagree with the sentiment that “if women saw themselves as men see them, they would have a much more positive view of themselves”. Seeing the thoughts shared on this sub aligns with the way I’ve been treated.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/24 08:10 AM
2

I would hope not but generally dealing with men doesn’t help either.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/24 07:51 AM
11

Imo this sub enlightens me that men are not as accepting as we think they are. If anything I have a less positive view on men from my time here.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/24 06:09 AM
2

Hm, like 3? In my 30s and ehhhhh 4/5.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/24 09:34 PM
3

TEN?? I couldn’t even fathom that.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/24 07:13 PM
9

Why is it such a common belief every woman has plentiful suitors? I’m often baffled by this because no one has ever actively pursued me much less tons of men. Do you account for those women when you make such odd blanket statements?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/24 06:50 PM
2

It’s always two extremes here because guys can’t fathom a normal reason that a woman can be single or unable to find someone.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/24 06:47 PM
2

I’m in my 30s too and most people are simply taken. I’ve only met a handful of single people over the last couple years. I don’t think that it’s all standards to blame. If we’re talking the apps, 30 yr women are not as devoted to using them as they would if they were younger so they’re not on as faithfully.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/24 01:24 AM
2

Right, I believe in any census there’s no “dating, coupled but unmarried” option. You’re either married or single. I’m interested in this as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/24 02:06 AM
18

Right, I observed this too.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/24 06:06 PM
2

Yes and I’m asking - what does being taken seriously look like? Just simply saying “yep this is a thing, thanks for pointing it out?” Reading through OP’s post- I’m genuinely curious as to what HE feels would be the next steps. I would’ve liked HIS thoughts.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/24 03:00 PM
18

Okay, so let’s say we take this seriously. What does the male sexlessness task force do now? Ad campaigns to encourage dating? A push to apps and meet ups? What does solving this look like to you?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/24 11:20 AM
2

I’ve never thought of it this way, lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/24 06:55 PM
2

Personally I wouldn’t really know what to say. Maybe the match felt the same. I hate when people basically engage in ice breakers instead of being organic. But I also think guys are just tired of the apps so they don’t really try to build up a rapport. They want to speed run the act of human interaction.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/24 07:52 PM
1

Generally - but we both know it’s not all women. I’m sharing my personal experience that mirrors a few other women. Stop acting like you don’t get the simple concept of how exhausting dating because you want to prop up your own incorrect belief that it’s impossible for women to struggle in dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/24 05:57 PM
2

Okay so you understand what rejection feels like. Why not commiserate about it instead of being snide and dismissive? This type of attitude is why this internet gender war is ongoing. Oh dear, we should never try to relate to others as a human being!
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/24 09:45 AM
4

Generally I agree that it’s lack of hope but not necessarily based on the belief that good men are hard to find. Dating is simply exhausting because unless you happen to find someone organically that likes you, it’s a numbers game. It’s not fun, it takes up a lot of energy. Additionally you just get really tired of your own form of rejection too, sure good guys are out there but do they want me? Maybe not. Add to that everything involved in dating . Figuring out if someone likes you, boring get …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/24 05:12 AM
2

I mean at this point we all get it, the majority don’t deny it. Maybe a few tik toks and a handful of comments make you think women don’t get it - but We. All. Get. It. What you’re latching onto is the outlier. Majority of women have kids, even as rates decrease - women with kids will always be the majority. I feel like guys are constantly trying to teach a random women over [insert age after 25] some sort of lesson with this weird mock concern that’s so annoying. All you’re doing is essentially…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/24 08:00 PM
–

I think that type of use of the apps gets your hopes up too. I always have to wonder “did he just swipe right on everyone or is he actually interested?”
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/24 10:06 PM
2

I’m so horrified by this thread lol. The thought that a simple dinner/drinks is not just to get to know someone but only sex is absolutely wild. Full access to my body because we went on one date and you shelled out a nominal amount of money? A date (especially if we’re talking online dating) is simply to get to know someone, this is the first time you’re meeting and the expectation is immediate sex? Absolutely insane.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/24 10:48 AM
3

Yep, I’ve always heard that dating is fun but it really isn’t. Exhausting, boring, stressful, disheartening. Hell, It seemed like guys didn’t even want to date me so I just left the market.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/24 05:09 PM
1

This too. I always wonder where these guys live where men are acting like this? Because I’ve seen tons of beautiful women out and about and maybe one guy will ask her out but I never see multiple dudes trip over themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/24 04:47 PM
2

This is what I thought reading this. I’ve never gotten even half of this attention.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/24 12:29 AM
5

I also don’t think guys realize that for the most part women can tell that you’re just not that into them so they reject the guys because surprisingly women would like to date men who actually like them.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/24 11:02 PM
6

Same! What’s the point if there are so many guys like this who begrudgingly settle for ugly women as if someone is forcing them to date?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/24 10:59 PM
7

There’s usually fierce pushback here because this is a rough place to admit you’re struggling as a women and there’s tons of simply mean shit being said here - so women go on the defensive. Theres no pushback to you because people are giving you measured responses in accordance with your stats. But I’m overall curious as to why you feel the need to double down and prove single women are miserable. I’m not sure if you think you’re helping these poor single ladies “know the truth” , but you’re jus…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/24 08:05 PM
8

This is a really good point. It’s always been my own mental issues that have kept me isolated and single, it’s not the other way around.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/24 07:52 PM
24

It’s referred to as a revenge fantasy because those guys only project misery onto women simply because they want to laugh at these women getting their “just dues”. They think women single over a certain age rejected a bunch of perfectly fine men - they never consider the millions of other reasons a women can stay single. It’s all in bad faith. I guess It’s fine to try to prove women are soooo miserable without a man - but I have to question you and your biases. Why are you trying so hard to prov…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/24 07:44 PM
3

I think this is true, it’s disingenuous for guys to pretend as if they think majority of women are attractive. They do not. A lot of guys here act as if women can’t be settled for as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/24 11:42 PM
10

I love that no matter the topic there’s always a slight jab at single women - “haha ya’ll are gonna be old, miserable and single”. You all are so fun. In this society, if there are a portion of men giving up, there are a portion of women as well. Video games, working to just afford your own little space, and accepting you wont find anyone, also appeal to women. Maybe that shift in women opting out of dating along with the guys will even out available options for the ones who want to date.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/24 01:51 AM
6

I think this is exactly what makes me dismiss a lot of the discussions here. A lot of guys are only thinking of a very specific, rare women and using it as a basis for their theories.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/24 08:31 AM
4

Ya’ll are such a study in misunderstanding humans - especially women it’s actually fascinating.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/24 11:11 PM
0

Is there no possibility she just met someone she liked at 38 instead of 22? You meet different types of people all the time. Do you just stop meeting decent people after a certain age or?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/24 10:56 PM
17

I feel the same. I think anyone who thinks older women always just settle because they can’t get any better are not older or they’re just not mature. They can’t fathom the growth you’ll go through in life.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/24 06:23 PM
16

Idk who Chad even is at this point.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/24 10:28 PM
2

No it’s not. If we’re talking the average women, they don’t know enough to fully transform their face so there’s no deception. Covering a blemish, putting on lipstick, emphasizing eyelashes will not suddenly change a women like a filter. You won’t look that much different from your natural state. The only caveat would be if you can do vfx or drag queen level makeup. They know how to really transform their faces because they’re intentionally using techniques to mask or alter what’s already there.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/24 08:03 PM
3

You seem like a really cool person! I love that you mentioned you met your friends as adults. I’m struggling with my current friendships and I really hope I find my tribe.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/24 07:23 AM
11

We keep parroting this but of course it’s not provably true. I wish everyone from both the “women are happy alone!” And “it’s not possible for women to be happy without a man” camp would stop twisting unstable research to back up their claims. Could we generally stop harping on single women at all? The only statements that I could find that are very true are In some relationships, women find they’re being pushed into the caregiver role in which they’re now responsible for the health and well bei…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/24 06:41 PM
4

I second this, people are just kinda half hearted about me, I’m aight. A lot of interest I get is either low effort or very much”eh, you’ll do”. But it would be nice to have someone actively choose me.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 06:32 PM
3

The age range keeps shrinking too! I thought it was atleast 18-25!
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 01:41 AM
7

I think it’s sad that theyre labeling 30 as old enough to pack it up, never expect more from life, all women are elderly. Imagine thinking life is only worth it for 20 years and the other 30-50+ years are just waiting to die?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 01:40 AM
4

I think this entire sub will make women rethink dating overall. The way every single type of woman is spoken about here is depressing as hell.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/24 01:39 AM
15

This is the thing. Its seems like a lot of posters think women get a binder of all the men who have been interested in them - whether or not they ever spoke.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/24 08:04 PM
2

Does this age range like you back? I couldn’t imagine that they do.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/24 09:39 PM
6

Can confirm! I am this women and very single lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/24 08:27 PM
–

I have never understood the “I don’t see likes so message me” thing. Is it just laziness or valid? Also I’ve encountered this as a woman on dating sites. (Even the buy me dinner:some guy 2 years younger than me demanded I be his sugar mama). Dating apps take effort, it’s not just a buffet of people who are perfect for you. You just have to dig and dig…and dig until you find someone who works for you. It’s not easy nor fun. A lot of unstable people, picky people, unpleasant, gravitate because it’…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/24 08:15 PM
15

I think our versions of being horny are too different to be compared (as the people who constantly post want to). We are different version of horny, no more no less. Apples and oranges. The indifference you’re feeling regarding sexuality is a cocktail of things. Societally, if you express your sexuality too much, you’re looked down on, clowned, and shamed. Sometimes guys hide their intentions behind niceties, false commitment, pretending to like you but operating within desperation until you mut…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/24 06:38 PM
10

Lmao - totally sarcastic!!
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/24 04:07 PM
9

Then if you’re neither young nor thin either you don’t exist or you should have found someone earlier, now you’re shit out of luck and destined to be alone because you’re old, icky and too girl bossed.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/24 03:51 PM
6

When you ask then it’s just generalizations of a very specific type of women that doesn’t apply to like the vast majority of other women.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/24 03:46 PM
1

You noting that big cities overstimulate and make you angry and standoffish is my experience too. I cannot date in big cities. I’m the worst version of myself every time I step outside. So it’s 100% true location is the issue. Also in large cities, everything is crowded to the max and let’s be real there are 50 more interesting people than you everywhere you go making it hard to even stand out if you’re just average.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/24 06:42 AM
4

What I am saying is that certain personality types have a hard time. That is just a fact. You are not that type therefore you don’t get it. That’s a okay. You simply don’t relate to this particular sentiment, other people will.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/24 06:20 PM
4

Yes, but I’m saying this applies if you’re someone who is social or draws people in, or if you’re attractive. If you’re quiet or plain, weird or maybe have no friends to go out with, it rarely matters how many places you go - you’re not meeting people.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/24 03:48 PM
7

This is kinda what i mean about people not realizing that that put yourself out there is easier said than done because they don’t know what it’s like to have no interest in them. People usually cluster together and don’t interact with other people, if they do so - it’s rare.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/24 03:45 PM
4

I get it. I was just noting that technically one is “out there” by existing. Plus, let’s not act like people don’t meet their SO at school, work, and common places they visit like grocery stores, cafes, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/24 03:43 PM
3

It wasn’t a joke? It’s okay if you disagree but this back and forth isn’t going to change anything and you’re just going to get snippy based on my opinion Again, happy the advice worked out for you, have a good weekend!
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/24 03:41 PM
4

I understand it, i was just saying that technically we are out there by default. relax. Idk why people jump down your throat for every little thing. this is my opinion/ my experience im glad that “putting yourself out there” worked for you though! Congrats!
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/24 03:37 PM
43

“Just put yourself out there!” It’s usually said by people who easily found someone or get loads of attention. Technically everyone has to be “out there” (work, school, grocery shopping) so that feels worthless to me. Edit: Yes, I know what putting yourself out there means. I was pointing out that by existing you are “out there” as well. Still doesn’t negate the fact that I think it’s worthless advice from people who are lucky or social.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/24 06:39 AM
15

I truly wish I could understand the constant fixation on women over 30 they don’t even want.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/24 07:13 AM
1

I did that swap gender app thing - awful, I looked ugly! So I figure the male version of me would be just as alone and unloved as I am now. I have at some point attracted men and women so I assume I’d have a little romantic interaction but not much. I know I’d be just as introverted.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/24 10:51 PM
2

Idk if you’re looking for personal anecdotes but for me I haven’t actively dated for years. I just…don’t feel like it. In my dating experience it’s always felt like I’m forcing a guy to actually like me so, I’ve decided to just stop trying. While I do desire some type of affection, I just note that maybe that’s not in the cards. I think guys have a perspective that attention is showered upon women no matter what they look like and in my experience that’s just not true. If you’re average, you don…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/24 05:43 PM
2

Honestly, not really! In my experience it’s been way more direct either a BM likes me or they really will not fw me and make it very apparent.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/24 04:41 PM
1

Exactly, why would I be a okay with being the desperate last pick to give half assed attention to?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/24 09:02 AM
2

Oh I know, humans are multifaceted and can have various types but I’m sure there are some women who simply are not your cup of tea. I would hope in those cases that you wouldn’t bother pursuing.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/24 08:52 AM
3

Of course I don’t know you or the dynamic in your past relationship but to me, when you realize a guy’s actual type it’s sort of send you on a quick mental journey “oh! Maybe he doesn’t like me!” And then you’re off on an emotional self esteem journey, lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/24 08:51 AM
6

I kinda agree with you also as a BW. It’s unfortunate when you KNOW you’re not their type. You’re basically a second choice and whether or not they know it they treat you as such. The “oh well she’ll do while i openly lust after that other girl” vibe is strong. Idk if you feel the same but as a BW especially you’re treated as if you’re a taboo option, as if you’re a stepping stone to whatever they actually want to pursue. Anyway - If I’m not someone’s type at all then they shouldn’t bother wasti…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/24 04:46 AM
3

Try again at which part?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/24 03:02 PM
5

For me it’s that I just don’t have the opportunity to meet someone irl. At work, I’m surrounded by only married people. I have a couple of friends who also have a couple of friends - that’s a dead end. I don’t love to go out in general, plus when I do I rarely if ever get hit on or found someone who’s interested. So I figured dating apps would be a good place to find someone atleast interested in dating. To me, they are incredibly awkward and horrible. Forcing conversation with a bunch of vaguel…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/24 07:48 AM
–

In seeing the responses whenever this is brought up, I always see a version of “well women should take accountability for [general issue they think is wrong in dating]” okay, but I struggle with understanding how to do that on a personal level. What can I, as one women do if I’ve already done the work to take accountability? What does it even look like, in a world of a billion women for us all to “take accountability”? That’s why to me this feels like just another opportunity to air out grievanc…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/24 06:14 PM
–

I agree that it’s different than a guy who’s not experienced this, but I think we have to erase the very false idea that women over a certain age have had tons of sex. It’s completely out of line with the reality of most average women.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/24 11:43 PM
–

Right, like I accept that ain’t no one want to date me (I wouldn’t either). I’m fully holding myself accountable.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/24 11:20 PM
–

Or “endlessly make fun of women if they don’t achieve the life I think they should have”. Theres no winning in this game of “accountability”
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/24 10:49 PM
–

Here we go. I ain’t engaging just to go round and round. Have a good weekend!
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/24 09:25 PM
–

That’s fair but I feel like if we constantly try keep making a point about “older women” then we need to start to present very specific people like your example instead of generalizing.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/24 08:54 PM
–

There are at most thousands of upvotes and comments on each of these posts. Let’s not sit here and pretend that this is a the central voice for single women. That would be like pointing to this sub as perfect representation of all single men.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/24 08:51 PM
–

The fact that you think women who have a hard time dating think like this is an example of the complete lack of understanding men have for women in general.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/24 06:12 PM
–

A large percentage of single women are not whining to the internet seeking sympathy. If we move over to real life, old single women are just living. Some are sad they’re single, some are okay and some are still looking - none of them want anyone to bestow pity upon them. In cases like these what does accountability look like?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/24 06:07 PM
–

The responses to your very valid comment prove your point really well. They’re misreading and double speaking to get you to admit something that follows whatever script they have for woman already.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/24 05:57 PM
–

I feel this, also at 0 for years now. Additionally with age the options dwindle naturally. Aint much happening out here.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/24 06:42 AM
0

Why do you think the average woman is capable of doing that level of make up to completely alter their faces? Most throw on foundation, eyeliner and something on the lips - this is not enough to dupe a guy into thinking you’re way hotter than normal. I think you’re overestimating how much makeup skills and time willing to put into makeup the average women has.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/24 04:14 AM
–

Is this possible to measure though? Are you looking for personal accounts from women, that’s the best you’ll get with this type of question. There will always be women who have 0 partners and those who have a lot that’ll skew any data.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/24 04:11 AM
2

I’d argue that women aren’t overly pressed to meet men because men give off the “meh” energy. This a thing Ive struggled with when it comes to dating. Guys will barely show an ounce of excitement to even chat or meet up so the obvious reaction from me is “he’s not interested” so I just go. It seems some guys interpret showing any type of excitement or planning as “working for it” so that either leaves women wondering if he’s even into her or she feels like she has to initiate everything and gues…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/24 03:29 PM
6

I’ve felt this way too. I think it’s also because this type of pill stuff targets literally every type of women with something negative. For example, I’ve seen discourse on how to use/practice on not conventionally attractive women and it does make me pause when it comes to dating because what if someone is doing that to me?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/24 03:21 PM
5

That’s so great that she found her community during this hard time. You’re so good for supporting her!
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/24 01:56 AM
–

I feel the exact same! I also fear that maybe I am also no relationship material and I’ll be so used to either not getting attention or being on my own to recognize an opportunity if it presents itself
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/24 09:11 PM
–

I think that’s how it goes here whenever women express being alone. The times I’ve chimed in with my similar situation to OP, I’ve gotten constantly questioned, talked down to and outright just anger. I like posts like this to know I’m not alone but I don’t think this is the place for them:
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/24 04:22 PM
4

I see your experience but I’m saying that it’s not the only type of 30’s woman. The equivalent to OP’s single man would be a woman who’s been in like 1-3 long term relationships and is now single in her 30’s.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/24 10:39 AM
13

Why do you conflate aging with automatically having a higher body count? I swear, ya’ll have only one archetype in your mind for 30 yr old women. Do you not have coworkers or anyone near you to give you a proper idea of what 30 looks like??
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/24 02:27 AM
3

Ive always thought that if someone just says “hey” then it’s painfully obvious they’re not interested. Which is fine but like then don’t even bother messaging.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/24 04:42 AM
6

I don’t think till ever get a satisfying consensus. That’s because you have a wild misunderstanding of women that you’ll never remedy because quite simply, you are not a woman. I mean, just your flippant dismissal of pregnancy (as if we somehow have a 100% working version of birth control outside of abstinence) gives me the idea that even if 100,000 women responded, you still wouldn’t get it.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/24 08:07 PM
–

I don’t even think it’s delusional women, it’s you thinking they’re delusional by them simply…existing. Somehow im highly doubting that you’ve met countless of these women, hell I haven’t met countless women that age range. In an ideal world, what exactly do you want these 35-40+ women to do once they realize their “value has decreased”? Should they stop dating? Should they curl up into a self conscious ball? Date men who hate them? Stay inside and cast their gaze away from men? I’m always confu…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/24 06:01 AM
–

This is what I’m trying to figure out. If they’re single “haha depressed wine chugging cat lady!” If they’re dating “how dare they, they’re not fertile and young!” If they’re in a relationship “who wants an old lady?” It seems they really want us to just like…die after 30.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/24 05:53 AM
4

Actually being a garbage man is pretty difficult. In NYC the salary ranges from 58-110k and pension. I think when disregarding jobs like this you have to look at who you’re dealing with rather than the status of the job. To me that’s a small minded person to make fun of a job they both know nothing about and probably couldn’t do themselves. That being said, I’m sure there are job that make guys less desirable to women regardless of the benefits (I.e I’ve heard some women automatically say they w…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/24 05:24 PM
8

It’s not trolling. There’s truly no real way to interact successfully with a lot of posters here. Many misunderstand women’s lives at the fundamental level so of course the conversation derails into jabs back and forth. While debating is healthy it’s impossible to debate with guys who can’t grasp that you’re just a human living life as best as you can and not a conniving villain thinking up ways to fuck over men.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/24 04:54 PM
1

This is what I figured would happen. You’ll refuse to read what I wrote then go on to shame me, misunderstand and pick at everything I try to say. It won’t be a debate and you’ll leave super chuffed that you talked down to some women. Feel free to keep coming at me since it makes you feel all warm inside.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/24 06:23 AM
1

You simply don’t seem to understand human relationships, so there’s no point in engaging here.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/24 06:17 AM
2

I didn’t say anything about bad options. Nor have I had many dating options.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/24 06:12 AM
5

No, I’m also have never used them long enough. It’s not that there are no quality choices, it’s just that the bad experiences and failed openers make me give up quickly.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/24 11:53 PM
2

Yep, for plenty of reasons that are too long to list - both mine and others, hasn’t worked for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/24 11:29 PM
3

I’m very single, mainly I’m introverted, weird with very few friends and insecure. So I didn’t go anywhere. It’s entirely possible to not meet any guy this way.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/24 11:02 PM
–

I think this is another “if I was a women, here’s how I’d live” type posts. There are so many women who aren’t fucking around with anyone if it’s not a long term relationship. You’re overestimating how pleasurable and desirable fwb and hookups are. Most women I know either never did it or tried it and didn’t like it. Especially women who remain single as they get older, they may not be happy about it but some have given up because dealing with men is simply not a fun time. I know that’s my exper…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/24 04:38 PM
–

There’s also a subset of women (me included) who simply don’t think they’ll make a good partner for anyone or have very little interest who just don’t try anymore. Granted it may be a small group but that’s still something.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/24 04:29 PM
4

From these responses it’s just feels like guys are operating under pure bitterness. They perceive single women over a certain age as being too picky or as a stand in for whatever girl rejected them, or the girls they pined over who didn’t want them and so they’re like “haha oh look at you! Single and miserable!” They hide behind faux concern or pretending they’re giving advice. I think it’s just guys relishing in women being “unhappy”.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/24 12:54 AM
2

I’d argue that we’re seeing obnoxious behavior never checked society wide, not just women. How many streamers have we seen fuck with people for no reason. Maybe humans are just becoming more maladjusted and rude. I live in a large city and everyone is in their heads living like the main character in a movie. Do you have an example of this type of attitude you get from women irl? How do they act that makes it seem they want you to honor their presence?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/24 01:15 AM
0

I don’t divorce personality and looks though so I’ll never totally 100% be able to answer you. But knowing nothing about him and not being in a bad place myself I think he’s cute. I think we’re not touching on different people’s taste - to me he’s attractive, to someone else he won’t be.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/24 06:49 PM
1

Okay but he’s cute!!
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/24 06:45 PM
0

Enthusiastically - let’s also assume he’s a nice person for this scenario. Personally, I think we’re at the same place on the attractive scale, I feel like I’ve swiped right on a similar looking person.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/24 08:28 AM
1

He would have the same features, but look younger so most likely yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/24 10:07 PM
4

Yes, I don’t know anything about him but personally, I think he’s nice looking.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/24 08:12 PM
4

Yes, but that’s just me. I know it sounds like bullshit but for reference, my celebrity crush is John Oliver.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/24 08:10 PM
4

To your question about finding the second man attractive - There’s no reason why someone wouldn’t find that guy attractive. Ya’ll are aware that other average women exist and find varying men cute? He has a nice smile, nice eyes, a full head of hair. He’s pretty cute to me. Whereas I don’t find the first man attractive. There’s this insidious thought here that women are always acting maliciously. She could simply like him because she has her own taste in men - no ulterior motives, no desperation…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/24 06:37 PM
2

If two people mutually want to have something casual and agree to be whatever to each other…fine. But I’m not going to be alright with someone telling that they like me and behind my back thinking I’m just the best of the worst they can get. I’m not saying it’s hard to figure out that someone isn’t into you, I’m saying that what OP is advocating for is fundamentally mean.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/24 02:50 AM
3

Average/ majority of women do not do this. It’s this insipid thought ya’ll hold onto to justify your cruelty that’s confusing to me. You really believe majority of women do this and even have the ability to do this…mind blowing. “Other people I don’t know have been mean so I’m going to be mean to random people” that’s simply weird.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/24 02:47 AM
19

So you’re advocating for tricking human beings into thinking you like them for “experience” just because you think they’re ugly. On top of this being cruel, this is a terrible way to gain experience. This is like telling someone to get 20 different jobs. You’ll pick up some skills but ultimately you’ve mastered absolutely nothing. Also, if you’re going into these relationships you have to practice being a good partner. You won’t be able to do that since you’d be only pretending to like these wom…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/24 05:55 PM
1

But you are trying to be mean. It’s weird how guys here seem to think most women who are single over 30 had wild years dreaming of being with a 6ft tall prince. Women who feel bad being single over 30 already know this, they feel this. Either they’re still trying to date or have decided to forgo completely. I’ll speak for only myself and whomever agrees. I spent a lot of time indoors and depressed. In that mindset you can’t go out, you can’t make relationships work, I only started figuring shit …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/24 10:20 PM
3

If my friend felt the need to save me, then there’s nothing the guy could really do? That means either I looked over at her or subtly let her know I wanted to leave. If my friend was wrong, I’d do a quick interaction to let them know I’m a okay. At most a guy could just be cordial to me and my friend.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/24 10:08 PM
1

Where does ai fit into these scenarios? While it’s not enough NOW to do certain tasks it will at some point eliminate certain jobs. Maybe that’ll play a major factor in slightly mitigating the fertility crisis in that a population decrease won’t mean millions are out of a job. (Idk that could be dumb) I couldnt imagine the government agreeing to pay anyone a full salary to have kids, there will be just as much opposition as there is support. I can imagine society getting worse because it’s alrea…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/24 06:59 PM
3

I think it’s mainly appreciation? Growing up, I was AWFUL at video games but seeing others who could play was fascinating. Additionally I admire the graphics and visuals too, which lead to an interest in figuring out how it was done. I don’t think it really has anything to do with the game developer himself. It’s more that video games are cool as hell.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/24 10:06 PM
5

It’s more that this is such a constant topic and at this point it just being used to shame women for getting older based on the pre conceived notion that women are boss babing it up and not “picking at the right time”. It’s also that the wall is never brought up for guys here.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/24 12:15 AM
3

They probably did not know about these men. I think we have to stop operating under the assumption that all women have met all their possible choices and rejected them.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/24 07:15 PM
4

Are we considering the women who were always ugly, socially awkward, rarely dated? Those women wouldn’t have the confidence to try to date nor would they be “used”.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/24 05:58 PM
4

“Is probably too used to want to put a ring on it” Questions: Why do you guys always equate aging with being used? Why do you punish women for aging, something they can’t prevent? Why do you guys keep trying to shame and guilt “post wall” women when you say you want to go after younger women anyway?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/24 04:57 PM
1

Some people probably wanted to have kids early but didn’t find their significant other when they were younger. Maybe they were together in their 20s but not financially stable. How do you propose fixing these issues so that people have kids earlier? We all know the downsides of having kids later, people are not willingly saying “you can easily have kids at 38” they’re saying “its still a possibility if you really want children”
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/24 04:51 PM
3

It’s always that these guys either fail to comprehend these types of women or they just make fun of them for being single.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/24 02:22 AM
1

Thank you. We’ve already gone over at length how these women deserve nothing according to these guys. We get it, so don’t date them and just let them live without the constant think pieces about how gross they are.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/24 02:20 AM
3

I’ve seen women all over Reddit admit they’re no prize. Plenty of times I’ve shared here that I ain’t much. Women are talked down or told “ men have it worse” so of course they’re not going to admit it here.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/24 02:14 AM
4

I mean, tons of women already know and feel this. Yet when those same women acknowledge that they’re not worth dating and just opt out they’re pathetic wine drunk cat ladies.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/24 02:11 AM
4

I’m so curious about this too. Some feel sad about their situation, some are okay, some are happy - and they’re all just minding their business and living life. The internal vitriol towards this demographic is really disheartening.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/24 03:24 AM
1

Irl there have been no interactions. On the apps, the guys aren’t bad at all. It’s just not working out, I’m just not good at communicating or keeping guy’s interest. It’s been a lifelong issue - It’s possible for a woman to just not be liked. In my original comment, I already noted I’m not comparing to men, since there’s no way I can. I’m comparing to only other women and sharing my personal experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/03/24 02:25 AM
1

No dates, no suitors, no successful interactions on the apps. Especially as you get older and more people are coupled up it’s even harder, I only know a handful of single people. I’m sure there are a ton of women out there who can say the same thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/24 05:59 AM
1

I have a nice little cocktail of nonsense that keeps me single haha. But I get what you’re saying - we’re all slightly unreliable narrators.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/24 10:20 PM
4

I have. To be completely real with you, I am very boring, not good conversation and have quiet hobbies. I’m not saying I don’t get matches but they’re not interested after trying to start up an convo or they’re not interested at all and pity swiped out of desperation. Physical looks aren’t a major consideration. Online I look mainly at profiles. I don’t think I’m excluding “3-5 range” guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/24 10:14 PM
32

I rarely see women saying they have a “more difficult experience dating than men”. Often times when women express they’re having a hard time they’re not comparing themselves to the male experience - which they of course wouldn’t understand. To your main point, I’m antisocial, awkward, unflirty and not hot enough to offset any of that shit. It makes dating very hard. Guys do indeed have standards. Especially when you’re not pretty they’re not overlooking all that just for a chance to date you. Yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/24 04:10 AM
2

It’s so interesting that you think these guys are being “forced to settle”. Dating has never been “attract hundreds of women!”. It’s always been find a handful you like and choose from there. Online dating has artificially made you see all the options that are out of your league, you wouldn’t have liked in the first place and the handful you like. Social media and our interconnectivity makes everyone think most others are a potential option. Guys are not forced to settle for anyone - they just d…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/24 07:09 PM
3

I agree here. I think because of all the options people think they have endless choices but in reality you really don’t. I’m so tired of dating in this city.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/24 06:25 PM
–

I always wonder, are we really meant to? It’s such a foreign concept to me to possibly be interested in most men I see, that seems exhausting. If we’re meant to be monogamous, it wouldn’t make sense to find a Lot of guys attractive - Wouldn’t you just need to find some attractive?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/24 03:33 AM
2

Just struggle to have sex or relationships too? I thought the term was “Forever Alone”?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/24 03:30 AM
4

Your reading comprehension is bizarre?? James, please invest in therapy - your worldview is skewed
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/24 01:41 AM
4

Being real with you here - I don’t think you realize that you’re coming across badly and it seems as though you may need a therapist? You just said most women (more than a billion women) have nothing to offer but looks and yet you’re calling out someone else while not at all realizing how cruel and skewed your thoughts are. I know a back and forth on the internet won’t change a single thing about how you feel but this is a concerning way to view human beings.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/24 09:41 PM
3

“Spinning ball of agony” is my favorite phrase I’ve learned today. Thank you!
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/24 02:03 AM
4

I feel like these kind of discussions never factor in the women who simply gave up dating. I had a friend who never had an interest, she’s not dating. I’ve given up and am trying to figure out how to afford life as a single person. There’s probably tons of women who’ve done this as well. Yes - there’s tons of stigma around being unmarried. On the internet there’s constant musings about how you ended up this way and why you deserved it. Irl you’re a bit of a weirdo. Even if you’re normal and plea…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/24 03:41 PM
–

All these risks exist with male escorts though? Some are even magnified.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/24 04:00 AM
–

I see what you’re saying, I agree.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/24 11:04 PM
–

Libido has been shown to decrease with age. If someone had kids, even further decrease. If someone is stressed, going through life changes, unhappy with their body, or just living - more of a decrease. If someone is in a sexually or emotionally unfulfilling relationship…yep decrease. Men also experience decreases overtime as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/24 07:04 PM
–

I think you have little hints of truth but as usual here, women’s motivations are always completely misunderstood. Women like good, safe sex. Unfortunately, that’s not a guarantee with any guy. Let’s think of the minor and major consequences of sex for women specifically: bad sex, irritation, disrespect, pain, stds, pregnancy, overall bodily danger. I don’t think a lot of guys realize how any one of these could completely deter even the horniest of women from acting in their desires. If there wa…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/24 05:29 PM
4

I feel the same whenever this is brought up. I really don’t think having families of 5-10 kids is truly the natural rate.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/24 06:03 PM
14

I feel like these guys want so badly to villainize older women for aging. Just like they don’t care what a middle schooler is doing - I don’t care what college aged kids are up to. I have so many bills to pay.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/24 12:58 AM
–

If you’re a pretty woman sure. But not if you’re average- ugly or a minority.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/24 02:14 AM
–

This is exactly how I feel. I am a terrible salesman and absolutely hate taking pictures. In a sea of other women there’s nothing that will draw anyone to me. It makes me feel super down and anxious.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/24 02:13 AM
–

When will we realize that these types of videos are not indicative of women as whole? Influencers, OF models, actual models, general pretty women who use their looks to get ahead can never be an accurate representation. You’d have more luck with random “on the street” interviews that are not staged or scripted. To take on some of your points Disgusing: All the conclusions you reached are within the red pill lense. Even if the average woman is aware of these terms they wouldn’t think like this. S…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/24 09:39 PM
9

That peel an orange vid was an act that couple does probably for clicks. The internet is inundated with people behaving in outrageous ways to capture likes and views. Would a solid, normal relationship make for a spicy discourse in the comments? No. Imo I think we’re at a weird place where content creators - especially those focused on love/sex/relationships - are staging their own little reality tv shows to build outrage and illicit reactions. So, people with no relationship experience look at …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/24 09:09 PM
5

Although I’m a woman, I strongly relate to this comment. (Idk if that’s annoying to say). I think that once you feel unlovable and it seems life confirms it - it’s so hard to tell yourself otherwise.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/24 01:50 AM
7

Next steps would be figuring out how to afford life on my own. I didn’t realize surviving on my own would be this difficult.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/24 02:33 AM
4

This train of thought assumes that (A) ALL older women have tons more experience than you do, which is false. (B) Older women will only factor in sex when dating - another false (C) just by having sex (even once) you know how to sex everyone. Having sex varies per person, just because you had sex does not make it so you totally understand all sexuality. (D) for some reason older women will instantly make fun of you for your lack of experience. Thinking like this just seems like you just don’t wa…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/24 02:30 AM
2

I’ve been trying to comfortable with the idea that I’ll be alone forever. I know it’s going to be this way, but accepting it is incredibly difficult. I think I’d need some type of personal enlightenment or to be at a really comfortable stage in life to fully accept that I’ll be okay alone. If you want to be in a relationship I don’t know if you would be able to embrace the idea entirely.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/23 09:58 PM
1

I feel like I’ve seen so many posts debating the happiness of this demographic. Is it because people want them to admit being unhappy compared to their peers? What would this admission prove - That they should have gotten into a relationship? I think if you live a life in which you’re happy you’ll have more moments of happiness. If you’ve been depressed, lonely or largely unhappy at most points in your life it may just stay that way. Constantly asking this just feels like shaming a small part of…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/23 09:54 PM
8

I think about this as well. Companies are rapidly trying to replace wide swathes of their staff with ai capabilities. Where does that leave millions of people who once had steady employment or are training for employment opportunities that will be gone in the next decade or so? We can argue that jobs will shift and change but we can’t say there will be the same amount of jobs left for everyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/23 08:15 PM
4

I think we have to think about what type of women you’re referring to. I feel like the default in a lot of guy’s mind is skinny and conventionally attractive. If you’re not those - there is no barrage of compliments and validation. There is no endless plethora of choice. Maybe a guy will like you, for the most part no ones that interested unless you have a vibrant personality. So the analogy for an average woman would be that there is a grand, endless buffet somewhere, but you don’t know about i…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/23 06:39 PM
7

I love this take. I also wish we did not make people feel pressured or wrong if they’re not dating/taking longer to find someone.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/23 09:52 PM
1

I just don’t think there will ever be a consensus on who is “worse” since we’ve all had such varied experiences. For example, most of the negative things I’ve experienced in life have included men so I have a weariness around them, I have mainly female friends and relate strongly to other women, Whereas you’ve had a lot of positive experiences.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/23 09:50 PM
–

Neither have I, I’m surprised places like that’s still even exist much less young women go to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/23 07:17 PM
4

I think that’s why this forum is so fascinating to me. I haven’t experienced or done any of the supposed activities women engage in. So it’s like peeking into a different world. I think this subreddit especially only accounts for a certain type of person and their experiences.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/23 03:50 PM
1

I also say that you won’t meet a ton of women in instant gratification based environments either. A lot of women have never really online dated and don’t frequent clubs/bars. So you’re not going to meet a wide variety of women. I have the same issue meeting men. I don’t go to those social places and know very few mutual friends with single guy friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/23 12:44 AM
3

Have you seen the posts on this sub regarding older women? You’d swear that older women magically change to miserable toads once they’re over 25.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/23 12:14 AM
7

I’m constantly baffled by ya’ll lives here. Why are you paying for things, all the time for your friends?? I’d only foot the bill for a friend if it was for coffee or a special outing.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/23 07:36 PM
14

I’m pretty lonely - I’m also a little weird, depressed, anxious and mistrusting. I push people away because I feel like I’m such boring drain. Would you want to hang out with that type of person? Much less date them? How great will that relationship be? Guys here seem to signal they’re desperate but average men and friends would not want to deal with this type of person. So yes, women can be lonely too.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/23 03:22 AM
48

I think you’re seeing these videos because you’re training your algorithm to show you these videos. Is there actually an uptick? Will there continue to be? That remains to be seen. Where did you get the 80% statistic? That only ones I could pull up state that 63% of respondents do not regret not having kids. That would track since the rates of childfree women have not changed so far - you noted millennials are not old enough yet to have accurate data there. We have to stop with the idea that the…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/23 09:10 PM
0

I’m sure if you set the age range younger there would still be some matches.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/23 09:17 PM
5

Sorry to be harsh - but I’d be pretty sad to match with someone like you. I hope I don’t run into too many guys who think like this. I get you’re venting, that fine, but man this is just so mean. Idk about other women over 30, but dating already feels daunting, you wish you’d found someone when you were younger but it didn’t work out, you know you look a little older (at 30 it’s not that drastic, come on) On top of all that then there’s just guys who look at you as a “high mileage shitbox”. This…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/23 11:42 AM
1

I think it’s because when someone brings up a topic, everyone else who’s experienced it chimes in. Now you have a big group all commiserating about the same thing. When someone is going through a tough experience they want to talk to people who understand. Maybe the topic is not something they feel like discussing with friends or family - where better than the internet? Additionally misery makes for better stories. Would you rather hear about a wonderful, perfect boyfriend or a weird first date?…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/23 10:23 PM
–

I think a lot of those guys have this imaginary idea that most women date heavily, filled with a false sense of confidence and look down on them. Basically they vilify women based on their untrue idea of how most women exist. Of course if they view women like this then when random women are struggling in dating, sad, lonely they perceive that as their deserved downfall. It’s like they’re seeing their bully live a worse life than them. It’s a weird way of othering women, pretending that we’re all…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/11/23 12:48 AM
2

For women who have jobs - what social programs are they using?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/11/23 06:55 AM
3

I don’t think anyone would argue that we don’t need each other. But this is very much reading as the voice of someone who believes that women are entitled and therefore uncooperative. Within your post you mention: Shitty fathers, Women “masculinizing” their behaviors so they’re taken seriously, Being the object of one’s desire, Sympathy(I’m assuming from men) All of these issues mentioned center themselves around men, with a minor foot note about everything else that could possibly be causing wo…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/11/23 02:24 AM
8

It’s interesting that you touch on realm life human experiences and then devolve back into the classic “hey gals, you’re too independent so we’re not gonna like you anymore and that’s why you’re not okay”. This just feels like yet another post linking. Women’s “desirability” or relationships with men as the ONLY thing we could possibly be concerned about. This line of thinking completely ignores that women, (like all humans) right now have a whole lot of problems independent of finding a man tha…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/23 10:19 PM
2

Personally I don’t understand how one can’t have at-least one of these experiences. I think having no acquaintances at all of the opposite gender is an uncommon experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/11/23 07:57 AM
12

Right - does no one just have co workers they joke with? Female friends in classes that you just talk to throughout the year? Neighbors? Cousins? Sisters? I’m so confused by these takes.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/11/23 07:48 PM
2

I honestly don’t get why this is such a constant point of conversation. Older women won’t just stop existing nor will younger women stop aging so this topic solves nothing while unecessarily shaming women for simply just being a bit older. It’s sad to see so consistently.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/11/23 08:12 PM
-1

This is kind of an impossible ask though? How can I police how other, random women treat men? You could argue that I can start with the women I know but I simply don’t know women who treat men terribly. I think this implies that all women recognize that there’s specific issues between the sexes when in fact they don’t. Even this post, I have no clue what the call to action is.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/23 02:03 AM
2

It’s crazy to me that this sub literally cannot even begin to believe this girl exists. Everytime I see posts like this, I’m like “who are ya’ll even talking about?”
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/23 05:23 AM
38

I like the points made here. I’ll also note here that the rate of childless/childfree women has remained consistent and we won’t see an sharp uptick no matter what the chatter on the internet says. I personally think the population collapse is not necessarily women waking up to the trials and tribulations of motherhood since a lot of people have the “well that won’t happen to me” thought process. I think it has more to do with cost and quality of life. The women who would have wanted to have a l…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/23 07:39 PM
3

When the check comes I just start getting my money out. There’s no big conversation about it. I’ve never been on a date that I couldn’t afford anyway. The waiter doesn’t care, they just see two cards and ask if it’s an even split. But If the guy offers to pay, I really do appreciate that. It just feels like he’s generous. There’s been so many times I’ve paid for friends because I enjoy their company and I appreciate them so that’s how I interpret it. I don’t put it as a strike against him though…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/11/23 05:40 AM
3

Ehhh…This whole post feels like you’re just vilifying “ugly” women because you’re annoyed they’re in your direct vicinity. OP this sounds a little unhinged.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 01:52 AM
26

This is exactly what I was thinking reading this. I don’t know many women who didn’t have a job or go to the school. To be honest, I didn’t consider that “wait around for man to pay for the rest of my life but until then leech off of parents in the meantime” was even an option.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/23 08:08 PM
42

“Dumpster dive” “Scraps” Does no one sincerely see the issue with talking about people like this? Are you really trying to act like you even like women by shitting on them because they may not appeal to you? While I understand your point( Not agree but understand). This basic level of disrespect I see you all have for women who have done nothing but exist without appealing to you bleeds into every interaction you have with women. It’s like an aura that repels. This whole post just feels so aggi.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/10/23 01:50 AM
2

I feel like Ive only know single. I honestly cannot visualize a life with a loving partner, it’s not in the cards for me. I sometimes feel like other people have had these huge milestones(marriage, kids, etc.) and I literally can’t even find a way to start the race. While I’m not entirely troubled being alone as I truly think I’d be a shit partner and I really love being home by myself, my main concern about being alone is cost and sickness. How will I afford suit by myself, who can I rely on to…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/23 02:08 AM
7

Because women can be bad at online dating too or have issues that prevent them from forming bonds. I’m decent looking and perpetually single, but trash at dating apps. I pop back in every once and a while remember how much I suck at it, feel bad about myself and leave. I think here guys don’t seem to realize they too can and do reject women for whatever reason. It’s not women sitting pretty while men grovel at their feet. In my case no one hits on me anywhere and I get very dry convo from guys w…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/23 02:03 AM
4

I know it’s not super insightful but it’s an issue I’m facing as someone who is single and childless.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/23 06:16 PM
11

I think if you’re not using the apps, don’t have friends to hook you up and are generally not out and about, no matter how decent of a person or a good catch you are, you simply won’t find anyone. I think it’s as simple and people just not being as “outside” as they used to be.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/23 06:09 PM
6

I don’t even think it’s possible to argue this point. “Ugly women are the problem” is a cruel and ridiculous take to begin with.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/23 01:46 AM
2

I mean, Yeh, the main reason I leave the apps is because I feel like I don’t measure up. I don’t have a witty one liner or fun pics with friends, I’m painfully average so of course I would approach the apps like “I don’t feel cute/sexy why would anyone else think so” or “he’s just talking to me because he’s down bad, I may as well spare myself this interaction” and just leave.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/23 07:26 PM
7

Women desire good, safe sex So while I do agree that men have higher libidos, I don’t think this is what’s making dating hard. If there was a complete guarantee that I would not get pregnant, get a STD that could forever fuck up my reproductive system, remain safe, and have a consensual good time filled with orgasm - then yes I would seek it out more. But this isn’t the reality. So instead of seeking out a potentially unsafe situation, a lot of women can just easily meet their needs by themselve…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/23 06:48 AM
1

Compliments from men don’t gas me up at all, I know most are lying or just being nice to get to an end goal. I, like most women know exactly what I look like - If anything these empty compliments hurt more than they help. Is a guy actually interested or so desperate they stooped down to my level.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 09:06 PM
1

I hate to continue on this morbid train but I would absolutely opt for assisted suicide. Being old sucks, it only gets worse and why am I holding on? At worst I’ll be a burden who slowly can’t afford my creeping medical bills at best I’ll be healthy but not as useful.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/23 04:37 PM
2

This makes total sense. My response was very much from how I and the women I know feel. So I appreciate seeing this POV.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/23 03:03 AM
2

I’m saying that’s there’s this assumption here that every women is very aware they have suitors. If no one has approached you, nor have you figured out who likes you to approach them then of course you’re gonna be like “well then no one is interested, I’m [insert undesirable thing] so I’m just going to remain alone”. I’m just speaking up for this type of woman who guys here seem to be really keen in telling me don’t exist.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/23 03:01 AM
-1

It’s interesting how we never touch on the women who find it impossible to even get into relationships. The awkward ones, the quiet ones, the not very cute ones, the hurt ones, etc. Let’s think Meg Griffin or Marge Simpsons’s sisters - women like this exist and give up. They already know they will not have stable families even if they desire so and just keep on existing. I know that’s how I feel and I know there’s a healthy percentage of women who feel the same. I’m not sure why this sub insists…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/23 08:31 PM
17

Your mom was and most likely has been hit on in her lifetime. She’s your mom but still an accurate source of what it’s like to be a woman. I would take internet sensationalism with a grain of salt. Most women will not react negatively to a respectful approach no matter what a man looks like. You are not a burden just for talking to someone who you think is pretty, anyone who acts like you are is not a nice person and not a reflection of how most women will act.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/23 08:23 PM
21

Speaking only to the childfree part - Childfree people do and will continue to make up a very small portion of the population. Focusing only on America because I live here - Between 10-19% of Americans report being childfree. That percentage has remained within that area from decades ago, ticking up a bit with every year. So the sudden annoyance towards that demo just feels a little hysterical to me. With 75-80% of Americans most likely having kids (yes, even if some are claiming they don’t want…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/23 08:19 PM
20

I’m guess you’re seeing this mainly on the internet? I think we have to remember you’re seeing a variety of thoughts from thousands, millions of people. If you see 20 videos of women not liking approaches, you’ll find 20 more saying they’re fine with it. There’s no collective “don’t approach us” decision agreed upon by all women at “2023 women decide what they all want” forum. Irl little to no women will tell you a simple approach is wrong and annoying. At most you’ll be told which approaches ar…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/23 08:04 PM
1

I was more thinking that to get to the point of being that desperate would instantly make me question myself rather than move forward.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/23 04:59 PM
2

In my own opinion, I find AI partners to be super weird for a few reasons. I couldn’t imagine “texting” a “perfect man” so he says all the things I want to hear, programmed for me. A computer programmed “hot man” feeding me lies that he loves me is both odd and completely different from my actual life so it would feel desperate to feed into that experience. There’s no overall benefit to chatting with a virtual guy. I barely want to chat with guys already. I think the overall “desperation” of suc…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/23 10:08 PM
2

I have a theory that if you are a single mom, at some point you had a bond with a man that created a child. (Not everyone but this is one theory). So knowing that bond, you’d really want to bond with someone else. Now let’s compare that to a perpetually single women with no kids, never really dated, didn’t have strong, long term relationships - she would have an easier time remaining single as they really don’t have the same insight into “what they’re missing”. But I think the short answer is yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/23 04:28 AM
4

I think it’s absolutely crazy that you even have to say this. Men do not want every single woman they have ever seen, therefore it’s 100% possible to be rejected as a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 05:43 PM
3

Where is the conspiracy? Multiple times here I’ve seen this exact sentiment. “Women don’t like _______ mainly because they’re old and jealous”Have you been here long?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 09:58 PM
11

We do think about it but we don’t sit there devaluing ourselves as much as you all do here. You grow as a human, you have good and bad times, you love yourself in different ways. You don’t just wake up and say to yourself: “I’m old, worthless and disgusting! Young man shan’t love me any longer, I hate younger women!”
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 03:36 PM
94

How do you know who is expressing this thought? It could be a young woman, a teenager, a man in his 50s. This is the internet - unless you’ve looked at everyone’s profiles on every site you don’t know if the main group expressing this is only older women. You have no way of confirming. Irl no one even talks about these amongst themselves often enough to even care, unless an issue similar has affected them personally, I think part of this whole thought is confirmation bias. Often here - we see a …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 12:04 PM
6

I’ve pretty much given up - i.e don’t do the apps, don’t flirt, haven’t met anyone irl. I think it’s a mix of low self esteem, anxiety and depression. A wonderful cocktail that makes even the thought of someone possibly liking me or going on dates wholly unpleasant. I also don’t really think I’m a good catch and not nearly attractive enough to make up for all the other things. So, yep, never dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/09/23 07:39 AM
2

I think it’s just the classic human script to have found someone by your 30s especially if you have kids in mind. So dating in your 30s is harder only because most people are taken. It’s also harder because you’re pretty deep in your job and any free time you have, you usually don’t want to spend it dating. I feel pretty secure after long battles with depression and I know myself so much better so it sucks that it’s harder to date now that I feel ready. Luckily I don’t want kids so I don’t feel …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/23 03:16 PM
1

If we’re thinking purely from a “useful” POV - It takes way longer to build a life on your own. With a partner you have double the resources.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/23 11:08 PM
1

Ah okay- personally I wouldn’t use the height filter even if it was free. For me, height is not something that’s a deal breaker. Right, while I’m not skinny, I wouldn’t skip over it because I don’t want to admit it. It would be one of those “I don’t feel like weighing myself right now, so I’ll leave it blank” type deals.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/23 01:21 AM
5

I didn’t even know there was a height filter - maybe I did see it and wasn’t going to use it, so ignored it. I wouldn’t be against it but I sometimes just knowing the numerical figure of weight is not enough to determine how good/bad someone looks. Maybe they carry their weight in a certain way. Additionally I don’t really think about skinny/fat unless it’s in extremes (I.e someone is 400 lbs) But if you really just wanted only skinny matches then why not - it’s not like everyone gets a notifica…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/23 01:15 AM
5

I have yet to hear a woman admit to doing this irl, so I’d assume it’s a small minority. I’d imagine it’s also so much effort to willfully dupe someone just for a night of dinner and then repeat multiple times a week. I’m too introverted but that sounds like an absolute waste of time and effort for very little payoff. For the women that do it, it’s foul play and frankly I think it’s a stupid thing to do.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/09/23 01:12 AM
3

Sure. But like…I admitted that I actively avoid dating so wouldn’t that already indicate some deeper issue anyway?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/23 04:09 PM
4

Maybe later today you can make a post about ugly men. For now, I’m sharing the perspective specifically from my POV.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/23 09:18 AM
10

I’m not being offensive by not dating or expressing wariness. No need to be hysterical.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/23 09:17 AM
7

The point was not to compare with men, nor do I care to in this conversation. It’s okay for me to commiserate with other women on shared experiences without engaging in the struggle Olympics or devolving into semantics.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/23 08:59 AM
11

Right, like as a not very attractive woman it takes years to unpack the negative interactions I’ve had with men. I can’t even date because of the way I’ve been treated and I haven’t even experienced close to the worst of what guys do. That’s why it’s always baffling to read how guys think all women have these leagues of kind, adoring men.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/09/23 06:48 AM
–

No, I don’t think men should be expected to intervene. It’s unfair pressure on bystanders that could easily get men injured or killed. It’s also unfair to assume these men have the ability to deal with he situation - they’re not police officers and there’s no guarantee they’re even strong enough to fix the issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/23 05:39 PM
5

To OP, apparently all 51% of women are within the age range and type he’s looking for. All other women represent some other percentage.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/23 03:32 PM
3

I don’t necessarily think it’s that women are happier within this dating game. The women I know who are actively dating right now are not really enjoying it. I know for me I absolutely hate dating It’s expensive, tiring, demoralizing and boring and I also have tons of self esteem issues. So I just opted out and accepted my fate. There are other women like me and they just don’t date, live quietly and either keep how they feel to themselves, have therapists or if they complain, they don’t go to f…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/23 03:20 PM
5

Yes, this is what I’m saying. Then narrow down what you’re asking instead of saying the “majority” of the 51% receive this attention. Shockingly within that percentage are women that “don’t matter” to you.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/23 06:28 AM
7

The majority of women are too old/young to use social media, don’t have social media, live in countries where they may not even have access to the internet, ugly, awkward, not interested and so many other factors. You are so obviously specifically talking about a certain age range and type of women- you are talking about the outliers but are convinced it applies to majority of the female population. A better question would be “how is it that women (18-30) in [insert country] has tons of guys cha…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/23 05:53 AM
2

I really feel a little more negative about guys. They can’t acknowledge that women don’t get all the attention they think they do. They have such bitter takes on older women. Even if a women relates to feeling awkward or lonely they spin everything into being her fault or having “too high standards”. It’s really like guys here think women are a whole different species.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/23 05:51 AM
6

It’s so annoying trying to even put this perspective out here in this forum. Guys simply will not concede that these women exist without engaging in the struggle Olympics. Idk why it’s so hard to understand, it further adds to my theory that those women are so invisible to them they simply cant understand.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/23 05:26 AM
4

I often wish when guys make sweeping assumptions like this they’d narrow down what type of women theyre talking about. You note women are 51% of the population but you know good and well you’re not referring to most women, you know they don’t have guys in their DMs. Be more specific in your question.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/09/23 05:18 AM
2

I really like dorky/goofy, and those guys who really love a topic and love to talk about it. I like to listen more than talk so I always appreciate learning something new. I tend to not like aloof or stoic because I have a hard time understanding when people like me so I’d prefer someone whose open about how they feel. Cocky is also not my cup of tea since I’m pretty “humble” (for lack of better word).
/r/PurplePillDebate14/09/23 03:55 AM
2

Essentially no one is stopping you from being able to get someone at or near your attractiveness. If you can’t find, attract, or date someone it’s not as if some invisible force stopped you - it just didn’t happen. Im single as shit but I fully acknowledge that’s on me. To pretend that it’s ALL women acting like they’re too good instead of acknowledging that some will struggle more than others is honestly silly.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/09/23 01:18 AM
1

Women are either already self improving or resigning themselves to being single.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/23 07:34 PM
2

I know we’re forecasting a good amount of people being single, but I wouldn’t consider there to be a “mass singleness crisis”. So far the level of people remaining single and childfree until they die is the exact same level as years past so I don’t think an uptick in singles is a major reason for less children.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/23 07:29 PM
1

So a movie written & directed by men, proves that women are delusional? Additionally you’d know she found him really hot, but he had a pompous attitude so she was trying to be cheeky and do a little mean flirt.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/23 12:54 AM
2

Anecdotally - I’ve never really had anyone interested in me in a club. No drink bought, flirting, nothing - I ain’t the ugliest but I’m unremarkable. While I think your absolutely telling the truth - If you really look around a club is every girl drawing attention?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/23 03:35 AM
8

I think all these guys are too jacked/fit. My type would be more (for lack of better words) average bodies? Like: Skinny: Jay Baruchel Dad bod: Adam Sandler:max_bytes(150000):strip_icc()/061417-celeb-dad-bods-5-957d6da9d331423481b793116f7530b7.jpg)
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/23 09:32 PM
0

I think there are valid points in the second paragraph. It’s true sort of now too - in that you usually need a second income. In many cases that is a man. As a personal anecdote I don’t want to be in a relationship, I’m iffy on how I feel about men and I know that’s gonna suck for me if I ever wanted to make a large purchase like a house.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/23 09:25 PM
3

I think people say this nonsense when they didn’t have to try to get someone to like them. A lot of people happened to be somewhere at the right time, connect with someone out and about or knew someone through work, friends, etc. When you just meet somebody existing of course you’re gonna be like “of course everyone can meet someone this way!” Then you get stupid platitudes like this. In truth it’s a game of chance and not everyone is lucky or is presented the same opportunities.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/09/23 09:13 PM
2

What is the difference?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/23 06:29 PM
1

I’m saying that a lot of times when men talks about older single women they act like they were all rejecting men left and right and that’s why they ended up in whatever situation they were in. Guys think they’re preaching to “promiscuous women” and do not realize that majority of women are not single post wall are not at all those women. They are the quiet ones, the unattractive ones, the shy ones, the mentally ill ones, the ones who had issues dating throughout their entire lives. So what I mea…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/23 10:50 AM
1

I was thinking the same, they all seem really cool. The true question is would they swipe right on me?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/23 10:37 AM
3

I sort of feel like, do we have to justify our existence though? I didn’t get a say in being born now I have to justify why I’m here? To whom and why? Do other animals have to justify why they’re here? Partly I don’t think so because of 3 reasons (1) I’m part of a minority of people who won’t have kids. Yes that number is increasing but we’ll never reach a point in which more people will be childfree/childless.(2) many people before me have passed without leaving a genetic legacy - maybe they co…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/23 10:35 AM
3

I wish I found my person in my 20s because I hate it out here and I’m so TIRED.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/23 10:22 AM
2

“Women have no remorse in rejecting men” This sentence got me because I see this often used as an excuse to be unnecessarily cruel towards women who did not reject you. If a women is 30+ and single it’s not getting a dose of karma or punishment. It’s not even that guys want younger women it’s the constant need to make older women the bad guy or the pathetic defeated villain that’s harmful and annoying.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/23 10:18 AM
1

I think we’re talking about 2 different points - In my very specific example, she is a women who gets no love or attention so although she’d flirt back she’s be under the assumption that he could possibly be interested not just using her as an ego boost. Do you think this man’s behavior is okay? Why are we focusing only on her energy and not him being deceptive?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/23 08:26 PM
1

I’m talking from my own POV which is most likely shared with at-least a few other women. Maybe she’s not desperate but why would any women be interested in a guy who faked being attracted to them to practice flirting?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/23 08:08 PM
2

As a older women whose not really everyone’s cup of tea - please don’t do this. I can speak for some other women - they already know what they look like, they already feel insecure but pulled themselves together to come out. To practice flirting because you’re starved of attention could either end up with you having a desperate women on you the entire night or just ruin the night of someone who just wanted to have a good time. She doesn’t deserve that.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/23 07:06 PM
5

As an insecure woman, I totally agree - 100% would never make the first move, I just assume no one is really interested so why would I boldly forge ahead for some guy to make fun of me for trying?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/23 07:02 PM
7

Yes! They project this “bitter old women” stereotype just because they feel vindicated that a women has “aged” out of attention from 20-something yr old men. They attach this condescending attitude onto older women as if the call isn’t coming from inside the house.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/23 06:59 PM
9

Right, I wish guys here would acknowledge that some women get this attention. It’s not as common or universal as they think. In a world full of other women, and especially places like clubs where there are beautiful women, dressed their best - most women ain’t getting this treatment. I usually just look at those women like “well, I agree she looks wonderful” and just have myself a good night.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/23 06:52 PM
5

It’s many different things: I think it’s the prevalence on the insistence that “18-24” is the only time a woman is valuable and therefore I’ll go for as young as legally possible and anyone past 25 is a eggless husk bitter cat lady” Ant woman hearing that would feel just a little uncomfy. Some women who have experiences of being hit on when they were kids grow up being very against the attention from older men. We’ve also seen countless cases of older men taking advantage of younger women - we a…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/23 04:28 PM
1

I think this would be heavily dependent on how old I am. At 30 - always the 40 yr old. I’d never go for a 20 yr old at my age, no matter what.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/23 04:00 PM
5

I never understood this - in every ad, tv show, movie, other media they show kids being absolute terrors with a harried mom struggling. I get that sometimes raising kids is like that but why is that the only thing they show so often regarding motherhood? How would a girl feel seeing that type of view all the time?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/23 06:30 AM
1

This is a really good point. I’m an only child without many close cousins and always around older relatives. So I was never exposed to young kids until my friends started having them. Even if I wanted kids, I have no family structure nor much experience - that would make me a somewhat shit parent.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/23 06:19 AM
22

Anytime I see articles likes this, I always wonder if this is also a natural reaction to a “baby boom”. Were the amounts of kids born in the past actually “unnaturally” way higher, now making people having 3, less or no kids an issue in sustaining an artificial population boost? For example my grandmother had 7 kids. Those kids went on to have 3-1 kids per person. My aunt was an outlier in this case, also having 7 kids but at that point already this seemed excessive (in western society, not wher…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/23 11:27 PM
-1

“but women do too! Checkmate! Accountability!” If you can’t even admit that there are spaces in which guys say some really obscene things about women then there’s no point engaging further. I’m going to block because I never want to see you again- but feel free to respond if you need to say more, love!
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/23 03:25 AM
-2

Yeh, I figured you’d come back like this as you do. There’s no point so have a lovely night.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/23 03:22 AM
3

I think it all depends. If a girl is being really crass and disrespectful, the comment do tend to roast her. There’s even subreddits like notlikeothergirls which makes fun of those holier than thou women. You’re going to disagree on this one, but guys especially throughout the internet talk about women in such awful ways. I can’t say that I see women match that same energy as often. I think people are just tired of this type of bashing on women so they reject anything that seems like it was infl…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/23 12:38 AM
11

Right - but I think people tend to dismiss someone’s attempt at discussion if it’s (A) presented in an offensive way. (B) only in hypotheticals (C) borne out of inaccurate/unproven information. A. Often people dont think they’re being terrible when they state their opinion but they are. Additionally some people don’t realize there a time and a place to state an opinion. B. For example, If you say you don’t like women with a past, and are already not pursing women with a past. Then essentially yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/23 11:38 PM
7

I think anyone can have any set of standards they please but Ialways wonder: - why do you feel the need to speak them aloud? - You’re already in a relationship so what’s the benefit of telling either those close to you or the internet your standards? Is it in an effort to make other guys adhere to your standards - if so, why? They should develop their own set of standards. - in sharing your standard what do you think will happen? I think you’ll get pushback because realistically there’s no actua…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/23 11:23 PM
5

Do you think majority of women are out having constant casual encounters until they get married? I ask because I know literally zero women like this.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/23 10:29 PM
4

I know for me, I’m an anxious person. So when I’m out around the neighborhood - walking my dog or just walking around - to be quite Frank, I don’t want anyone to talk to me. Not a man or a cute little old lady. I want to get the task done and go back indoors. Being out and about doesn’t always mean that the person really wants to socially engage, I know that’s a hard thing to gauge in other people.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/23 10:28 PM
4

You described this really well - the whole “single women are happiest” feels like the same misinterpretation of the phrase “Jack of all trades”. It’s misquoted without calling back to the source.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/23 05:54 PM
6

I never get this “women get hit on everywhere narrative” I’m never hit on anywhere. Why is this so engrained in guys minds?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/23 05:15 PM
4

Fine, I’ll bite - green, orange, red, yellow, brown.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/23 03:02 AM
4

There is no collective answer to this question.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/23 01:48 AM
5

I think it’s up to each Individual to determine what the woman they want brings to the table. I just don’t think this is a question that could possibly have an answer that’ll cover everyone. That’s why this question is so loaded - the answer varies wildly based on how one perceives life. My answer may work for you but not some other guy. I know this sounds very basic but in relationships whether that be friendship or romantic relationships, I feel that each party should at least bring a level of…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/23 12:39 AM
2

Third - I think guys are so trying to combat the “woman is wonderful” effect in their minds that they other women to an extreme extent. Just like any human, women can be unable to form bonds, not have much family, not date/attract anyone. Not being able to relate to women because you assume they all have it easier and you’re mad about it is weird to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/23 11:12 PM
0

If a guy isn’t atleast slightly enthusiastic to hang out then I always assume he’s not interested and just went on the date because he felt like he had to or I was one of the least appealing options. I think I’m used to people either showing some positive or negative reaction that anything in between is harder to figure out.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/08/23 11:09 PM
3

This is not the best sub if you’re a woman who is, single, old, single mom, older mom, divorced, had a bad childhood, pretty, ugly, have a job, don’t have a job - well anything. I find on particularly shitty days when I feels really bad about myself I have to avoid even checking this sub. I’m so sorry you’re going through your struggles.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/23 10:36 PM
5

I feel the same as you, I don’t understand the “bitter girl boss or beloved mother” as the only 2 options. I’m just existing.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/08/23 10:14 PM
1

I want to date to actually find a guy who’d like to stay in with me. I don’t want to go out but you have to when dating, I wish I could fast forward to comfortable part of the relationship where you didn’t have to go out. I think finding women who are actively staying in is hard, but speaking as one of those women, you’d probably find them online dating, at work, through friends or a quieter events. As an introvert, you just have to grin and bear it but be upfront in saying “hey, I’m introverted…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/08/23 03:28 AM
4

I think it’s partly because guys have said they’d have sex with any girl if they’re desperate enough. So essentially we’re aware that we can be chosen just because some guy is horny and not because they actually like us. It’s not flattering to be told “eh, you’ll do” so it’s not an ego boost.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/23 06:01 PM
2

I feel like guys here are so caught up in being chosen that they don’t consider that they are also choosing themselves. I’m an incredibly introverted and honestly pretty boring - I can throw out a joke here and there but I ain’t that interesting. It’s incredibly detrimental to dating, all of these points hold true from women as well. While some guys may chose to overlook that a woman is boring there still some guys who won’t go out with that boring girl either.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/08/23 06:00 PM
3

I agree - I think since everything is so expensive we all feel the need to be better to earn more. Then we see all these get rich quick schemes and constant visages of fame and fortune. It’s tiring and I wish we could have a new version of Hank Hill that people don’t feel “ashamed” to be. Just hardworking, normal people. When I tried dating I always wanted average dudes, I hate the hustle mentality.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/23 04:58 PM
2

I think they do but of course it varies heavily. That’s why you always hear the anecdote of women being incredibly confused by their friend’s choice in men. And no, I don’t care about a man’s muscles. For me they don’t do much.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/23 01:27 AM
19

Right, maybe OP lives in a hotter state or knows lots of people with pools to collect this data.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/23 07:18 PM
43

I feel like if you’re in a friend group and you’re constantly being asked to pay for Ubers, dinner, always the one being asked to move - they’re taking advantage of you. In my experience, I don’t ask any of my guy friends to do that.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/23 07:16 PM
1

I see what you’re saying but for me that does factor in. I would say like less than 50%.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/23 11:02 PM
1

Depending on the app you can see first messages before you swipe. I wish I could give you an accurate percentage - but since I’m on the apps I can try a 15 min swipe (yes I will talk to guys I match with, this is not just to prove any point)
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/23 10:57 PM
1

This is just me, so idk if Im speaking for majority of other women - empty profiles - certain things in bios (Instagram handle, disrespectful bios, etc.) - age (younger/way older) - lifestyle (I tend to not like police, or people who travel a lot but this varies) - certain first messages. This seems like a long list but it’s a quick process.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/23 10:48 PM
0

I thinks it’s because we don’t only “disqualify” based on looks, there are so many factors that would make me not swipe right.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/23 10:36 PM
2

I think this is kind of spot on, a lot of guys are operating off misconceptions about women, what they look like and how they act so it’s generating bitterness that’s creating animosity. There are just average women, who look perfectly fine just not really super appealing.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/23 10:33 PM
1

I totally agree and this is a really rational view. We’re meant to see the whole person, not a static posed image and a little bio. (Also what if you’re just super unphotogenic or hate writing about yourself?) we’re not mean to scan through people like we’re online shopping and awkwardly try to force conversation with uninterested people. That’s why a lot of people don’t like OLD - it’s just doesn’t feel like a good way to experience others.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/23 05:05 PM
0

Right, that’s hurtful af. Imagine going outside to just live your life and somebody basically uses you as emotional target practice.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/23 01:18 AM
3

I assume youve online dated before? You cant entirely vet someone just by talking to them. They could be totally different in person. Your response is kinda nasty lol, why are we going 0-60? Why the energy?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/23 02:17 AM
1

In terms of your title, i don’t know if that directly ties into standards. It’s more how you met the person, either irl or online. I think coffee dates are okay if you’ve met online - you’re just meeting the person, you have no clue if you’ll click - it’s a good way to get out fast (if needed) and not spend too much for both parties. Then you can move on to another location if you’re having a good time or have a longer date next time. But I agree, I don’t think just coffee dates are ideal if you…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/23 01:53 AM
15

I feel like there’s always this weird thing where if a women is single, especially for a long time - it’s assumed that’s she’s like “I don’t need no man! I’m independent! Girl boss! Hear me roar”. Do the single “independent” women you know proclaim they’ll never need help? Theyre just like normal people who go to the right people for things they don’t know. Why do we need a debate on claiming that single women will need someone to help them? This view is just a random statement that has some mis…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/23 08:11 PM
27

Same, reading through I was like “?! What??”
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/23 04:51 PM
0

I couldn’t imagine so - the wedding industry is a 70 billion dollar industry and marriage is still seen as the pinnacle of relationship. There is a slight decrease but that could just be because most people are feeling the money crunch and not spending as much but not lack of interest. People who are determined to get married most likely don’t think “oh but what if I get divorced?!” Maybe there’s a pre nup for that but when you’re in love that’s not top of mind. We also see that even though wome…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/23 05:36 PM
–

Yep, my mom told me that in the past women didn’t age, it was just pointy boobs and youth - Idk what happened but all of a sudden they all started aging in the recent years
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/23 05:22 AM
5

This is my reality lol. I don’t clock it anymore because it is what it is, but when I was younger it would bother me that no one seemed interested. I don’t ever flirt and just talk to guys on a base level friendly way and move on. I feel undesirable and a little “well damn, I’m not that bad!”. But I don’t really feel animosity towards guys. I feel more annoyance/sadness towards my own self. The constant attention that guys think all women get is baffling to me because I can’t even imagine.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/23 04:52 PM
1

Could it be that people underestimate themselves too? Not thinking you’re good enough, no one will ever like you, putting yourself out there and facing more rejection (than you can handle). Lack of self esteem has totally killed my will to date so I can imagine a good amount of people are in the same boat.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/23 12:42 AM
1

Yep but I wouldn’t make eye contact with everyone in the room. That’s unnecessary.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/23 05:30 AM
1

I would say maybe 1, if I’m lucky 2. I haven’t had any interest in years so I’m aware of how unappealing I am.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/23 12:03 AM
2

This is really insightful info, I appreciate it.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/23 08:44 PM
0

I have seen discourse about BMI and different body types but what I mean is that there’s not an “epidemic” of fat women. Everyone has gotten larger and it’s unfair to just call out women as if it’s a gendered issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/23 10:10 PM
-1

Okay but everyone is fatter. Let’s not pretend there are somehow exponentially more fat women than men.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/23 10:08 PM
-2

there’s an epidemic of fat and slovenly men as well. Americans are all fatter. Why not mention both?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/23 09:25 PM
1

Most women don’t, most settle down with their first or second serious bf. Majority of women don’t want to or have engaged in casual sex. Easy access to casual sex doesn’t mean women engage in it.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/23 06:52 PM
1

I didn’t mean that they were overall indifferent to men just don’t respond as guys would.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/23 06:22 PM
3

Yes. This is the perfect breakdown.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/23 05:24 PM
0

This is a bitter take. Most women are not out here finding themselves and dying to date male models.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/23 05:10 PM
2

To be wanted just for youth is sad to me tbh. Youth automatically fades so after the youth is gone what then? Will they just move on? Guys keep throwing this out there like it’s an easy metric to reach even though we’re all aging.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/23 05:08 PM
1

That’s not what women meant in that thread - they were just saying they don’t notice people not that men have to start “peacocking” to get their attention. The point was all humans are mostly average and women don’t respond to visual stimulus like guys do.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/23 05:06 PM
2

Same! At this point it is what it is.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/23 05:02 PM
3

Literally most of the women here are saying yes and the guys are simply rating the women. Confirmation bias is a hell of a thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/23 05:01 PM
2

I’m a plain Jane myself so my only pool is average Joe and that’s a okay. As long as we vibe, he has a personality that meshes with mine. How well we get along matters way more than looks.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/23 04:56 PM
3

How is everyone looking at you for you to make eye contact with everyone? I live in a big city, you never really need to acknowledge anyone directly so you note other people are around, stay aware of danger but rarely eye contact.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/23 04:51 PM
5

I feel the same, I don’t really notice anyone unless I’m directly interacting with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/23 10:58 PM
2

i think the claim here the men find majority of women attractive absolutely ridiculous. It’s simply not possible to look around and be attracted to majority of the other sex. So that’s way overblown. While I don’t think many guys are truly unattractive , I would consider most men (honestly most humans) neutral. That means they’re neither attractive nor unattractive - they just are.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/23 07:41 PM
–

Maybe he actually thinks she’s attractive?? Maybe she’s he best friend? Maybe he actually thinks of women as humans? Ya’ll have a weird syndrome of thinking everyone views women in the exact same way you do - pretty items to be used.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/23 03:08 PM
–

Most women split bills evenly - even if the man makes more they still live within reasonable means. Maybe wherever you’re from that’s uncommon but US nationwide that’s normal. The complaint comes from guys doing close to nothing. If we’re both in a household where we both make messes and both contribute similar amounts - why must one person be the only person to clean it up?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/23 02:52 AM
1

Granted I never really have to seriously consider having kids but although other people could make it work a lot of people can’t & consistently struggle. Their kids have less tools for success. I’d feel terrible producing another human just to exist terribly. But I think this type of argument will only ring true depending on how you feel about life in general, I have a very negative view on life so of course it makes sense to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/23 10:10 PM
1

Couldn’t it also mean that a percentage of men are also not dating/refusing to settle too? It’s can’t all just desperate men and women being like “oh, not him!”
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/23 07:38 PM
3

This makes me feel better in a weird way - I’m part of the consistent never settled percentage. Haha.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/23 07:33 PM
1

Right, I don’t understand thinking women don’t like or want men - there’s not gonna be a mass migration to singleness.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/23 07:20 PM
5

I’m in the same boat, I’m single and close to your age - so I just don’t see kids happening. But the way the world is, I don’t think I have the adequate resources myself so I couldn’t imagine being able to prepare my kids for all this.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/23 07:16 PM
1

I sometimes chime in with my perspective as an romantically unsuccessful woman but I’m often told that it’s impossible, I must be really really off or ugly or just downvoted. Guys here can’t seem to perceive that just a women whose slightly introverted and a little awkward can just be single.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/23 04:40 PM
1

I think guys here have “othered” women so much and only train their focus on women like IG models they can’t fathom just a normal person.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/23 05:50 AM
–

I sometimes chime in with my perspective as an romantically unsuccessful woman but I’m often told that it’s impossible, I must be really really off or ugly or just downvoted. Guys here can’t seem to perceive that just a women whose slightly introverted and a little awkward can just be single.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/23 05:40 AM
1

It’s so obvious based on what they think the average women wants that they are totally divorced from the normal woman and think their for you pages represent the majority. They really think they don’t ignore the average women.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/23 04:34 AM
1

I hoenstly don’t understand how guys don’t realize that women who wait to get married aren’t swimming in choices but holding out for a man’s idea of a “successful man”. Sometimes it just takes longer to find someone, it’s just life.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/23 04:31 AM
1

Absolutely Man A - for looks: I’m alright looking so I certainly don’t expect a super model. For relationship: I need someone who is into me as much as I am to them, life is rough - having a lover and friend, someone who cares for you, wants to hang out with you, a companion, is ideal.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/23 04:29 AM
1

No - life has a way of not going according to “plan”. It’s takes long to really figure out what you want to do and actually get it done - so this whole “script” we’re meant to follow at each age is b.s. I think her idea of how life should move is too rigid, to me, that’s intensely close minded.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/23 04:19 AM
2

This is a great analysis of those situations.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/23 07:53 PM
–

A. He’s basically telling me “you’re super duper special and those other women are hoes” I hate when guys do the whole Madonna/whore thing - it would be an instant turn off. But I also feel like fucking around is just generally unsafe, lord knows what diseases he could bring back.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/23 01:56 AM
2

I was responding to the commenter so yeh it’s not directly tied to your point.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/23 01:07 AM
1

You’re choosing not to acknowledge my point either so - we’re ships passing in the night, it seems.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/23 12:06 AM
1

The unkindness ya’ll have towards women makes me hope you’re single.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/23 12:06 AM
0

Okay but this didn’t disprove that women are multifaceted humans who live life and do not cease to function without men.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/23 10:22 PM
1

A bunch of weight loss companies would try to shill some shit product with a tagline “your perfect man is waiting! Get into your ideal weight now!”, tons of women would fall for it. Women who couldn’t already date or don’t want to date would just continue on as usual. I don’t think ya’ll realize how many women are really not out here dating or having sex lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/23 04:56 PM
1

I would assume this includes lesbians and poly people so if we factor those lifestyles in it could make sense. But it could just be a statistic that’s misquoted.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/23 04:28 PM
2

That list was just the amalgamation of what I’ve seen here - If you’re truly seeking a non American, skinny, jobless, virginal under 25 women who has experienced nothing that can lead to any type of trauma - yes, you’re only looking for a very very small percentage of women - unless you’re like 18 or something from a small, idyllic town.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/23 04:21 PM
1

I think the pushback is that the answer here especially seems to always be women’s “inflated sense of self” instead of literally any other factors. A lot of women have low self esteem, the world is socially weird right now, dating on both sides is a challenge but I feel like the answer always turns back to “women feel like they deserve hot guy, silly ugly women!”
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/23 03:48 PM
0

She’s answering your question and has already told you she’s single - what do you mean what’s the problem then?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/23 03:42 PM
2

Because they can never imagine that women are multifaceted humans, living life and enjoying the same simple pleasures they do. They think without relationships women cease to function.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/23 03:34 PM
1

I don’t think single women pretend they’re happy - a few women commenting that they’re fine and the same statistic that they’re happier is not proof. We don’t need to dog on single women by saying they’re “pretending to be happy” with “SSRIs, wine and a deluge or affirmation from TV shows and social media” - they’re just living as best as they can. I don’t get the bitterness when we talk about single women and how they’re living, whether it be happily or not - Isn’t everyone just trying their be…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/23 03:30 PM
1

You won’t get a singular answer because women are all different? How is this not obvious? Do you think all billions of us meet together and decide how we’re gonna treat men for the next couple decades?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/23 03:25 PM
21

But in a sense the guys here are signaling that they want a very small subset of women. In A LOT of these posts I wonder if they even want relationships with another human being - no past traumas, no one over 25, not too fat, no kids, no “career women”, no American women, no women whove had sex, etc. Women are told they’re just good for a pump and dump, they’re not useful, they’re bringing nothing but their vaginas. So of course seeing these constant perimeters one can assume they’re only lookin…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/23 11:28 PM
1

Right? It would be extra weird if a woman accepts a 3rd date but doesn’t like the guy. She would be a super weirdo to me
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/23 11:10 PM
6

I honestly thought it was common sense. But from some comments it seems like it’s not. If by a third date you can’t at all figure out if she likes you why not take that as an obvious sign?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/23 10:05 PM
1

I think if they had just normal, everyday women it wouldn’t be entertaining. They want hot women, with high standards, super young to pull in both curious listeners/viewers and raise the sex appeal. So I don’t think those podcast, etc. are representative of a wide majority of women.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/23 10:53 PM
12

I think we fully understand, you won’t stop telling us about it. But if I myself am not promiscuous then what should I really do this that information? You can talk about it together, circle around the topic forever and continue to shame that imaginary promiscuous women you’ll never meet. But to what end? I feel like it only leads to you assuming that most women you meet sleep around a copious amount because they can.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/23 08:07 AM
2

I have, so have friends. It wasn’t great. I think the first time is rarely if ever good because you don’t know each other’s bodies yet.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/23 06:34 PM
5

No - in my opinion having sex with a man who loves you vs. a man who was desperate and needed to have sex with anyone creates two very different experiences. Not saying casual sex can’t be fulfilling but it’s usually not better than if you’d just did yourself in. I would rather be single till the end of time than engage with someone who doesn’t even care what my name is.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/23 06:27 PM
1

The majority of women aren’t on OF, sex work, sugar babies etc. Of the billions of women maybe millions engage in that - not enough for it to be as common as you think. The vast majority of soft sex workers don’t make a sustainable living. For example, people are getting wiser to how little the smaller creators on OF make. Rarely do women continue soft sex work into advanced age - additionally we’ve seen some workers struggling with knowing their videos and pictures widely shared and forever ava…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/23 06:21 PM
9

The fact that anyone could believe this about women is so interesting to me. This just feels like you’re mad/confused by women and choose to “other” them like they’re not human beings. To think the majority of women inflate their egos and no one but ugly and fat women have low self esteem or a healthy view of themselves is a ridiculous view.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/23 06:36 PM
0

It’s great that there are examples of social anxious women successfully dating but as the commenter said - many still struggle. Dating apps when you’re ugly and socially anxious are not a playground of positive socialization - they’re overwhelming experiences that fill you with self hate and doubt. As usual we’re going right back to be women can never struggle because they get just a little more attention than man do.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/23 08:23 AM
1

I agree with this take - I simply don’t think I’m capable of forming a romantics relationship (barely friendships but that’s not the post)somewhat due to the unhealthy relationships I’ve been witness to. So I take it upon myself to acknowledge and work on myself so I’m not hurtful to other but I don’t really think I would be able to date normally, ever. It’s a painful realization to accept.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/23 08:03 AM
15

I’m introverted too so grain of salt - but from what I’ve seen with friends and myself the average would be like 4-8 in a lifetime. Guys here tend to think that that because women have options they want to take those options. For women who like causal sex, the headache it takes to have sex with multiple partners is not worth the often mediocre experience - getting tested, pregnancy scares, dealing with vaginal issues from random men entering your orifice, changing sheets, sifting through bad dat…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/23 07:59 AM
2

I mean there are single women into their 30s/40s who this community would deem “post wall” with dwindling options. I’m sure theyre aware that their dating situation won’t be as fruitful. I think some happily single women are tired of dealing with men or never really dealt with men so they don’t feel like their missing anything by not being in a relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/23 08:59 PM
7

I think guys are just very vocal about what they like. whereas women’s are not out here making pages for their type, making memes comparing types, commenting about their type. Whereas that type of thing from women is pretty rare. I’ve seen tons of diversity in types because I’m in a diverse area. A multicultural highschool and a large city will expose you to so many pairings of unique guys and girls.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/23 08:49 PM
23

I identify with your comment so much. Guys have shown interest but only after all their Bette r options were gone - so instead of being settled for I’ll be by myself which I always know is a loving space. I hate cleaning up and sharing space with anyone so, idk how that’s gonna work if it ever happens.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/23 08:36 PM
4

Yes! I also think people assume that if you can’t get this naturally occurring thing - you’re lacking something that you have to fix or work on rather than just not being in the right place at the right time.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/23 08:31 PM
7

Ah I see what you’re saying. I think the same thing applies - you automatically think “I have my shit together professionally and I’m a nice person, etc I should be able to find someone”.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/23 10:47 PM
2

Maybe they dont really know how to answer in terms of SMV (a term I’d never heard until entering spaces like this), so instead they answer with what they’ve done in their lives and what interests them. It’s honestly a weird question to ask anyone - so it’s a hard to understand what the expected answer is. If someone asked me what I bring to the table I would never think to list out traditional feminine qualities “submissiveness, agreeable, cooking skills, etc.”
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/23 10:08 PM
1

Wasn’t there a study that said that women are also opting out of dating? That would remove a good amount of women out of the pool as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/23 04:04 PM
1

I mean the college bars was just to drive home the point but I’m referring more to a mentality of staying in one spot in your life. At some point most people want to mature - have a family, stability or whatever. They try to date seriously and just to run into older guys who won’t move into that next stage which can be frustrating.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/23 07:06 AM
1

No - it’s not necessarily creepy but usually being an older dude trying to maintain the same life he had at 20, sitting around a bar full of college kids is not great.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/23 01:10 AM
24

The path to obtaining a relationship is absolutely no fun. I can see why anyone would opt out.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/23 11:41 PM
4

I’ve only seen that when a women is trying to seriously date and guys seem to not really be interested in relationships and still want casual even if they’re in their late 30s. It’s more about her frustration than shaming him.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/23 11:35 PM
1

I understand your perspective thank you for sharing your experiences. Knowing this I see how your idea could help other young men who were also taught to see women as totally innocent. I think as long as there’s an additional lesson that “not all women are like this but always look out for (x,y,z) when dating so you don’t get taken advantage of”
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/23 02:39 AM
5

I just don’t think this is the solution for fixing gender relations because majority of women don’t wield their sexuality to negotiate better treatment from men. Sometimes I feel like guys have this notion that all women take a super secret “how to get men to do whatever you want and take their money in the process” course. Women are not cunning foxes and femme fatales. A lot are just bumbling around trying to figure shit out, they don’t know or try to even harness sexuality to coerce men. While…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/23 02:21 AM
3

Same thing here! I’m like “but am I really that bad?”
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/23 03:12 PM
–

This is actually an interesting question to me. Humans add value to each others lives - hence friendships, coworkers, found family, etc. in your day to day life can you really say women are good for nothing but sex because I couldn’t imagine reducing a man down to a body part like that. Do you have female friends, teachers, family?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/23 02:48 AM
1

I wish we’d clear up this misconception here because I’ve seen “she wasted her time in a career and now she’s alone and single” used all the time when we talk about especially single women with jobs. Not all single women who have jobs sacrificed a relationship to have one or hyper focus on career because they don’t have relationships. A lot of the time a job is just a necessary evil to survive.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/23 08:35 AM
9

I thinks it’s offensive because If she’s fat, it’s visible. It’s not like it’s something you can’t see, so asking seems more like you’re being mean. On the apps - If you think she’s hiding her fat with angles then just move on. Also asking for exact pounds is really weird: “how fat are you? I only do 132lb or less”. It would make me think you’d constantly monitor my weight, make comments if I chose to eat bad food or make fun of me if I gained even a pound over your preference. But I think it ma…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/23 03:48 AM
6

It’s really odd, and I feel like they really want older women to care deeply about this topic.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/23 11:38 AM
2

I always wonder this too, like we’re no longer stay at home mom and power suit wearing barren women. Most women have jobs so when does a women with a job become a “career woman”?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/23 10:39 PM
1

Ive seen love, but it’s incredibly rare. Finding someone who cares about you may be easier but still doesn’t really feel possible, especially as you get older. Personally, I think if I was going to find someone who cares/loves me then it would have happened, that fact that it didn’t I wholly believe it never will.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/23 10:30 PM
3

I think you’re being facetious, Mr. V. Have a good one.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/23 09:47 PM
3

Some people believe promiscuity=loose.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/23 08:52 PM
2

I meant like “loose vagina” myth.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/23 08:44 PM
8

Idk because I don’t understand the basis of a lot of the opinions here, but I think: - Maybe they’re nervous that whomever they end up with has a lot of partners and will compare them. - they’re religious or Virgins so they don’t understand any other lifestyle. - Some random myth about looseness. - They’re annoyed women can be successfully promiscuous and they may not be able to be. - trying to shame random women for behavior they don’t like in hopes that’ll convince other women to be less sexua…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/23 11:34 PM
4

In my experience they may be like “Oh! He’s cute!” And throw a few glances his way But never like “dear god, I need to rip his clothes off, he’s so very hot!”. It’s not asexual but not as intense maybe? Idk because I’ve never seen this phenomenon from women irl in my life.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/23 04:28 AM
–

I know you’re talking about older women who share their views online but just make sure you keep in mind that most older women/people don’t pay attention to young people and who they date. I haven’t a clue who old men date or a young lovely women date unless it’s told to me and even then I absolutely don’t care. I feel like we’re constantly assigning negative attitudes to women who are just trying to exist. Painting them as bitter because you think they’re no longer beautiful.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/23 02:20 AM
0

I have rarely met women who LUST after a guy, no matter how hot he is. So I kind of believe that we don’t see hot guys and want to fuck em or masterbate to their visage. That just seems really thirsty and weird to me. I think your definition of attraction is incredibly subjective.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/23 02:16 AM
3

I feel like if you know you’re ugly (or just simply not very attractive) - you already KNOW. There’s very little doubt about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/23 03:10 PM
0

Been there done that, I’m very feminine all the time - never leave the house looking bad. Flirting is a no go for me so oh well.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/23 05:04 AM
1

Lizzo has a really nice face, talented, kind, fun, plays instruments, dresses nicely, won various awards. But she’s thrown into the “low quality” because she’s fat? Honest question, do men value women on any other scale besides outward appearance? Does nothing else they ever do matter? Do you actually like women as humans?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/23 09:11 PM
1

Same, everytime I’m like “oh I’ll try again” it’s drowned out by “but it’ll be like last time which wasn’t great” so I just sit my ass at home, lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/23 09:03 PM
0

What men of a lower level? If you could point me to them out that’d be great because I haven’t had any flirty exchanges with a single guy in years. I don’t know who these women are who have men chatting them up left and right because I’ve barely even talked to a stranger. Make up/clothing are not magic - if you ugly there’s only so much dressing up you can do. You may not think a women is capable of just being plain ugly but that’s your opinion.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/23 08:52 PM
1

I dated a lot for a while. Being not very interesting is absolutely a hindrance since you still have to talk to guys once matched. If the conversation fizzles then there’s no moving forward.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/23 08:47 PM
-1

I’ve looked within, gone to therapy, asked people - no one confirms that I’m super weird, so I’ll believe them. A little awkward, of course (or else I wouldn’t be here). To your last point, I hate dating, I’m home a lot and to be frank I’m not interesting so those are factors.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/23 07:00 PM
0

I don’t know why we combine women who are forever alone and have high standards when starting the conversation about forever alone women. If a women feels forever alone she probably does not think she is worth dating. So no matter how she improves she does not see herself as a viable option. Speaking from my own experience which other woman may share, I have had very little dating success. I acknowledge that I’m decent looking, dress nicely, okay weight, etc. but that has not worked. As a woman …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/23 06:30 PM
0

I find these posts so funny. If it was simply this easy for women, all women would be in a relationship. I consistently struggled and finally gave up while checking off all the minimum requirements, it’s almost like guys have way more standards for what they want in a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/23 07:25 PM
4

This is a very interesting post. While I understand what you’re looking for is hard to find especially as you get older, there’s no need to communicate your preference - at most you’d tell a woman that “you’re waiting until you get married” not that “you’re seeking a virgin”. Usually if you express that you’re waiting it’ll naturally lead to some type of conversations that’ll confirm that they feel the same way you do. Overall, I understand your points but I think where a lot of guys go off trac…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/23 06:57 PM
-1

How is it possible to underestimate their effort, if it takes me effort to work out as well? It takes a lot of discipline to build a work out routine so of course most women who actually have to/want to work out already know. Do you think women don’t need months of consistent working out and eating right to maintain? We’re all human. I think it has more to do with just preference than not knowing how hard a man works. This is just kind of a silly point.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/23 06:37 PM
0

I’m not denying statistics. Ugly women do exist, maybe someone will like them enough to date. But they’re not gonna have drones of men genuinely interested in them like more attractive woman would.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/23 10:28 AM
6

I don’t mean that she is finding & rejecting hotter men - I’m talking women who go weeks, months, years being single with no guy interested.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/23 10:13 AM
7

We all know they’ll get matches - that’s what I meant by a “different set of issues”. But those matches most likely will not work out - conversation could be incompatible, the guy could be nasty/rude, maybe they don’t make it past the first date because she’s boring and ugly in person. But again ya’ll are stuck in your own “woe is I” echo chamber that you can’t even simply admit some women struggle with dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/23 09:34 AM
10

I don’t think there’s any way to actually express to ya’ll that there are women who do not attract any guys. They are just out there single and plain with no interest. There are women who are just weird, awkward or absolutely boring so they can’t even attract guys with personality. The fact that this is hard to believe is why we will never see eye to eye.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/23 09:24 AM
5

What about situations in which no man is offering anything to them?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/23 09:22 AM
16

I see what you’re saying. I really don’t understand women try to act like they have the same dating issues as men - we should just acknowledge we have our own set instead of trying to compare.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/23 03:13 AM
12

But why is it so hard to acknowledge that women who are truly undesirable have a different set of issues that make them femcels? They simply struggle in a different way that you can’t understand just like I don’t fully understand men’s dating issue. Are you mad at everyone who struggles with different issues than you?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/23 03:01 AM
2

Iva had romance and now I’ve been through a long period without it. While I understand romance is not the be all, end all I do feel unhappiness not having it. I think it’s a mixture of that feeling super unattainable: “oh, so…no one wants to date me?” And wanting to feel like someone actually sees value in loving me: “I would love that kindness and love from another person”.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/23 02:43 AM
6

This is why her relationship is failing, she’s using a land line
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/23 02:37 AM
2

So why ya’ll struggling so much?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/23 05:55 PM
11

Yes, this is my exact feeling. Why would I be with someone who barely likes me when I can just not expose myself to that.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/23 05:28 PM
16

There was a post a while ago asking about “ugly girls experience” and tons of women replied. Some of us know we’re ugly, thank you. It’s ya’ll living in this illusion that the only girl that’s attractive is skinny and white yet every women can somehow have an army of suitors.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/23 05:14 PM
–

The issue I always have here is that you guys will not let go of this myth or even fathom a life that’s different from yours. I am living proof that not all women are able to obtain relationships and there are others just like me. Apparently men are not all okay with any ol woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/23 06:34 PM
–

Point 1 - there are women who are ugly, socially inept, women men won’t even look at. It’s crazy to me that guys can’t perceive at truly desperate women with no options. In regard to point 2 - Men pretend they have no options either because they’re also going for hot women so wouldnt it stand to reason a lot of guys are rejecting certain women? So it’s possible for women to be desperately single.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/23 05:33 PM
1

Makes total sense, thanks!
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/23 05:22 PM
1

How would you want women to help men get access to sex?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/23 04:35 PM
0

I hate to say this but biology, I’m straight therefore i find men attractive. I can’t pinpoint anything in particular though.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/23 11:56 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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