TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

OpticaScientiae Archive

View 1 post and 43 comments by OpticaScientiae on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
20

Spousal Support / AlimonyOpticaScientiae/r/Divorce_Men03/01/26 08:20 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

Right? Her budget without alimony also showed she would end up with about $2000 extra each month, even after accounting for savings. So he has no demonstrated need, which is legally required in my state. But I suppose I'd have to appeal at this point and hope for an appeals court to interpret the law as is written.
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/26 04:29 PM
7

I don't have kids, luckily. I pay $3400/mo in alimony, despite my ex being imputed at $200k per year income.
/r/Divorce_Men19/07/26 07:07 PM
1

That might be fine then, depending on what the court orders. In my case, automatic orders required that I pay all her legal fees, but I was able to do so.
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/26 08:31 PM
1

Depending on the jurisdiction, he might have to keep paying for her, or at least all of her legal fees if she isn’t working.
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/26 06:49 PM
3

I found imputation to not work. The vocational evaluator concluded my ex should be immediately capable of $130k and listed dozens of roles she’s qualified for that pay $200k. Ex claimed best she could do is $60k and the judge said $80k. There isn’t a formula for alimony in my state anyway and she didn’t need any money based on her living expenses, but I still now have to pay $3500/mo.
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/26 12:06 AM
2

Or the partner decides to stop contributing out of nowhere. That's what happened in my case and now I'm out millions.
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/26 04:58 PM
2

That's not always the case. My spouse stopping working just because she doesn't like to work was one of the reasons for my divorce, but it still took me a year to file after trying to convince her to get a job again.
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/26 03:54 PM
2

I agree with OP in the case where nobody took years off of work due to having kids and both people are capable of comfortably supporting themselves financially. In those cases, I don’t believe alimony should be awarded.
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/26 07:22 PM
1

I hope that's how it works here. I suspect you're right, but my lawyer couldn't give a clear answer because it comes down to what the judge rules or what the settlement agreement says. Luckily my ex isn't going too crazy with the legal fees yet, so I'm not too worried. It's medical expenses that are piling up that I wish I wasn't on the hook for paying out of marital assets.
/r/Divorce_Men16/05/26 05:42 PM
1

Could be. In my state, all money prior to finalization of the divorce is marital, regardless of the separation date.
/r/Divorce_Men16/05/26 03:02 PM
1

Legal fees come out of marital assets, so that's probably what he means when he says he's paying for her lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men16/05/26 04:30 AM
1

I'm in the US, but I started in September and we've gotten nowhere. I think the timeline simply depends on how flexible both people are. I've given dozens of proposals, but my wife hasn't budged on anything ever.
/r/Divorce_Men17/04/26 04:37 PM
3

Dude, she's entitled to half of the marital assets in every state in the country. The fact you tried to take away her money from her and got garnished as a response is the consequences of your lawyer's terrible advice.
/r/Divorce_Men17/04/26 01:09 AM
0

Should have had a better lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men16/04/26 11:55 PM
6

Yeah OP's advice is terrible. Some states immediately issue automatic temporary orders once the petition is filed that prevents you from cutting any of the money.
/r/Divorce_Men16/04/26 11:52 PM
7

There’s a lot to say, but the one that is top of mind at the moment is how much she hated me for having professional success.
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/26 05:52 PM
1

Some states have automatic temporary orders that block this immediately upon filing. Sure, you can avoid filing, but that also means things drag on forever if one party isn’t cooperative.
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/26 07:42 PM
1

Stop using AI. With that out of the way, some of your points are fine and some make no sense. One person having access to funds doesn't matter when the other person can get temporary orders opening access with a rubber stamp. Who pays for the other person's defense doesn't matter because temporary orders often force the higher earner to pay all legal fees for the lower earner. So I don't understand how either of these points are leverage. You can't force a non-employed spouse to get employed bec…
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/26 06:28 PM
2

No, you sound insane. You don't even want to hang out with your own son? WTF is wrong with you?
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/26 12:44 AM
2

I wish I could get mediation moving that quickly. If the documents have been exchanged, definitely review them and start thinking of scenarios you would want to propose so you can be ready to discuss strategy in your next meeting with your lawyer. And if you suspect financial details are missing, let the lawyer know ASAP.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/26 04:43 AM
2

The challenge is getting to an agreement where alimony is less than the spouse was spending during the marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/26 06:03 AM
1

Sometimes people can't cry. I haven't been able to since I was a child due to all of the abuse I had to live through.
/r/Divorce_Men27/01/26 07:16 PM
1

We’ll definitely do that since it’s required in CO. We tried a collaborative divorce mediator where no lawyers represent us and that went nowhere simply because my spouse refused to budge on anything, no matter what I offered. So then I got a lawyer and filed, but mine also doesn’t really know what to expect since there aren’t any formulaic rules for high income households.
/r/Divorce_Men22/01/26 04:14 AM
1

In your experience, have you had a case where the state doesn’t have a formula and the SS recipient refuses to budge on extremely unreasonable amounts? Is there basically no way to avoid trial in that case or do you find that mediation with lawyers tends to break through this stalemate?
/r/Divorce_Men22/01/26 04:06 AM
2

Sorry, I shouldn’t have used the term liquid. She’s getting more than a million after we split things equitably. I don’t have another million in anything to give her after that.
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/26 02:59 PM
1

For this high of an amount, I won’t do a lump buyout because they usually aren’t adjustable. And my term would be seven years. I also don’t have anywhere near a million dollars in liquid assets to give her after we split everything.
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/26 01:06 AM
1

CO
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/26 02:36 PM
2

Yeah, but it might not adjust the amount very much considering her profession pays low six figures on average. In mediation, I stated that her field’s median income for our area should be used. She disagreed, of course, but I think it’s reasonable.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/26 02:36 PM
1

This is the biggest thing for me too. At this stage in my career, I want to found a startup or join one and I don't think I'll be able to for at least 7 years now.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/26 02:43 AM
1

I was already in the highest tax bracket, but you're right that much more of my income will be taxed at that rate. Yet another one of Trump's wonderful changes to this country.
/r/Divorce_Men05/01/26 12:02 AM
1

This is very rare, but great that it worked out for you.
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/26 09:41 PM
2

That’s definitely what I’ll push to have happen, but at most, she’d be making 15% of what I do.
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/26 03:50 AM
4

This amount was using the state's calculator based on the highest I earned in the last three years, which was about $900k.
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/26 02:38 AM
2

As long as the alimony is adjustable, you can go to court to request a reduction if extenuating circumstances, like a layoff, impact you. But I'm pretty sure a judge wouldn't allow that if I voluntarily took something like a 30% pay cut to go to another company. And the unknown of exactly how much I have to pay is what's keeping me where I am right now. The other frustrating thing is that my pay varies year to year by multiple hundreds of thousands of dollars purely due to my company's stock per…
/r/Divorce_Men04/01/26 02:37 AM
1

Your understanding is what my lawyer told me. It's not super cut and dry since the court only looks back 3 years and she hasn't worked as a professional in that time period, but I'm hoping to successfully make the argument that her income should be imputed based on the median salary for her profession in our area. I just wish that similar logic could apply to me and not based on what I actually made in my profession.
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/26 09:47 PM
3

👍🏼
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/26 09:06 PM
4

Respectfully, I’m going to truest my lawyer over a Redditor. If we reach a settlement with a much lower alimony, of course I’ll change jobs. But my state defines earning potential based on the highest income earned in the last three years.
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/26 08:47 PM
2

I'm going through this right now. We don't hate each other. We don't fight. But the process is going super slowly because my spouse has no incentive to cooperate because as long as we're in the middle of it, she doesn't have to work and I have to pay for everything, including her legal expenses. I'm running out of patience, but even the timelines from the court are super long.
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/25 05:01 AM
1

To simply reach an agreement. Nothing else. They don't care about fairness, just that you will reach an agreement that a judge will accept.
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/25 05:02 AM
1

What state are you in? This is the logic I'm trying to apply, but the mediator is trying to say we have to use the formula in Colorado, even though the statute clearly states that the formula cannot be used for incomes above a certain amount.
/r/Divorce_Men15/11/25 12:10 AM
2

This is a wild comment. Maybe OP wants to be a good parent and not subject his children to indoctrination.
/r/Divorce_Men02/11/25 11:57 PM
5

The decision to separate for me was amicable and we both want the best for each other in the future. But for the divorce process itself, spouse agreed to a collaborative divorce but refuses to budge on anything and it’ll likely have to go to trial now. Someone got in her ear to convince her she deserves $23,000 per month in alimony.
/r/Divorce_Men01/11/25 07:51 PM
2

That can be prohibitively expensive for people. Also this can make it difficult to retain the home later.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/25 04:20 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter