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P_L_U_R_E Archive

View 2 posts and 113 comments by P_L_U_R_E on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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24

Rape is 2 minutes of sex with someone you don't really want to have sex with. As a RAINN hotline volunteer who has heard the stories of countless rape victims, I know of thousands of men and women who would disagree with your trivialized definition.
/r/MensRights10/06/13 08:11 PM
1

This is a great question. I would think yes, it is very similar. If you enter into the relationship with a strict understanding that you are to be on birth control, I would actually say it goes right along with robbing her (if the case is a woman who fails to use BC as agreed upon) victim of "his freedom of choice and makes herself the overlord of what should be his autonomy, in every possible way." Now whether or not this should be considered rape is an entirely different thing.
/r/MensRights06/06/13 04:02 PM
1

Wow, I guess that shouldn't surprise me. That's why we didn't have cable TV when my siblings and I were young, and why I also won't have a TV when I have young kids.
/r/MensRights06/06/13 02:05 PM
40

Because they are trained from early childhood to "tough everything out," men are more likely to internalize their emotional responses to being raped. Having always been told they are not permitted to acknowledge and seek relief from the experience of vulnerability, self-doubt, hurt, anxiety, or fear, they cannot simply flip an emotional switch and begin explaining these responses to others. Having been trained to present themselves as strong, capable, and confident, they cannot simply reverse th…
/r/MensRights05/06/13 03:47 PM
8

Any time. I'm a feminist, but I do it occasionally as I am genuinely interested in certain topics and trying to understand them as the members of this sub do. It's nice to get real, civilized responses and especially suggestions for further reading. I read/watch all the links and suggestions I get when I come here. So thanks to everyone who responded :) Edit for the extra word.
/r/MensRights04/06/13 07:17 PM
9

Gotcha, thanks for the recommendation, I'll definitely look up Sommers.
/r/MensRights04/06/13 04:26 PM
3

Thank you for the response :)
/r/MensRights04/06/13 04:09 PM
48

Someone please do correct me if I'm wrong but isn't the 1 in 4 statistic based on surveys of women, not of actual reported rapes? I mean it's no secret that rape is a generally under reported crime and so it doesn't work as well to rely on actual reports. Very quickly I looked and it seems it is based on a National Institute of Justice CDC survey (from the late 90's, mind you) and it seems it was in fact a survey. Not that this information couldn't be false, but doesn't that make the conclusion …
/r/MensRights04/06/13 02:59 PM
1

Yeah I read this and was immediately facepalming because I've never heard a feminist say something so stupid personally, and if I did I would probably laugh out loud. Then I saw it was fake and now I feel better.
/r/MensRights29/05/13 10:27 PM
5

Lots of good info here, thanks.
/r/MensRights29/05/13 10:21 PM
2

Yeah I see what you're saying. It's pretty unfortunate but you're right. I'll bet it helps if you've been in the situation before. My ex and I had to learn that the hard way but I think we're both much more established and sure of what we would do if ever in the situation again. I still think people should be able to have a mature conversation about it and I definitely think "testing" your SO is the worst way of trying to figure it out.
/r/MensRights23/05/13 05:14 PM
6

Signed and shared!
/r/MensRights23/05/13 02:29 PM
10

I've never understood the whole idea of "testing" your partner. If you can't be mature enough to communicate your feelings about these issues to the point that you have to fake a pregnancy scare in order to know your SO's "true" feelings, you shouldn't be in a relationship. If you know the person you're with is anti-abortion (or any other number of positions on other issues) and you aren't, it's probably not going to work out. That's something you could establish rather quickly in an open and ho…
/r/MensRights23/05/13 02:23 PM
2

I would be very interested in having a level-headed, rational discussion with you, if you'd like. I promise there are feminists who allow debate, I am one. If you're really serious, I'm available.
/r/MensRights02/05/13 10:00 PM
3

Hah awesome! Subscribed :)
/r/MensRights03/04/13 12:51 AM
0

That's because there are no feminists there.
/r/MensRights03/04/13 12:45 AM
3

Actual feminists do allow it; however, /r/feminism is not feminist.
/r/MensRights03/04/13 12:30 AM
2

Open discussion reveals the mods for what they really are, and that is definitely not feminist. That's why they censor everything. If you want a real feminist opinion, head over to /r/feminisms or /r/TwoXChromosomes.
/r/MensRights03/04/13 12:29 AM
-7

/r/wherearethefeminists
/r/MensRights03/04/13 12:18 AM
4

/r/wherearethefeminists
/r/MensRights03/04/13 12:18 AM
-1

They pretty much ban anyone who disagrees with their incorrect make-believe feminism, especially actual feminists FTFY
/r/MensRights03/04/13 12:14 AM
4

You should actually start this. A sub was started to point out all the inconsistencies and mod fails in /r/feminism, and is made up almost entirely of real feminists who have also been banned from that joke of a sub.
/r/MensRights03/04/13 12:12 AM
38

They particularly enjoy banning actual feminists who call out their shit. /r/feminism is the biggest joke on reddit.
/r/MensRights03/04/13 12:10 AM
9

I would hope no one actually believes /r/feminism has any feminists. The real ones have all been banned.
/r/MensRights03/04/13 12:09 AM
4

This is true. There is, in fact, an entire sub dedicated to pointing out the horrible modding and failure that /r/feminism is. /r/feminism is anything but feminist.
/r/MensRights03/04/13 12:05 AM
6

Anecdotal. My apartment is far and beyond cleaner (not to mention neater) than any male peer of mine.
/r/MensRights26/03/13 03:33 PM
3

Yeah all I could think was, where are these young men who want to clean, and why isn't my roommate one of them?!
/r/MensRights26/03/13 03:31 PM
1

Agreed. None of this hit me as, "wow that's so outside typical feminist thought!" This is feminism as I was raised on, that I studied, and that I continue to support. Female sexual agency has been and continues to be a central issue. Like you, I've also had sex I've regretted and have been raped, the difference is strikingly clear, and feminism has helped me to see that.
/r/MensRights25/03/13 03:33 PM
3

Its like saying to your girlfriend "Yea I'd love to fuck that girl working at the jewelry counter" My boyfriend says stuff like this to me all the time. I think it's hot. Especially if I agree. Doesn't bother either of us one bit. I think it just depends on the relationship.
/r/MensRights25/03/13 02:47 PM
3

I was involved in a similar venture as OP. One thing I would recommend is to talk to the health services department or whoever handles the sex-ed and resources on campus and evaluate what services are being offered to men, especially in the realm of reproductive health. Our uni had almost none, other than free condoms. We took this information along with data from another campus organization who surveyed students about various issues from drinking to sexual assault and found that a lot more men …
/r/MensRights20/03/13 04:20 PM
20

Very interesting, I have a similar experience as a woman in a severely male-dominated industry. I get a lot of pressure from male co-workers as to who I'm dating, when I will marry, when I plan to have kids, etc. There are many field men that refuse to take instructions from me, and will take them only from my male subordinates. I am called "aggressive" when outspoken at meetings while my male coworkers are just being "leaders." That being said, like you, I have more positive experiences with me…
/r/MensRights18/03/13 08:48 PM
38

As a female who posts things just like that all the time, the "she is probably hot so I'd go for it!" comments are the absolute worst, IMO. It just normalizes and reinforces the false perception that men must always want sex, especially teenage boys, lest you be stigmatized and your sexuality/masculinity questioned. Every time I see one of these I die a little on the inside.
/r/MensRights18/03/13 04:18 PM
13

RAINN volunteer here. We find that people who call us overwhelmingly prefer to be called "survivor" than "victim." It gives them a sense of empowerment, like being raped or assaulted is something they can overcome, rather than something that will haunt them for the rest of their lives.
/r/MensRights12/03/13 06:26 PM
1

This is called the "No true Scotsman" fallacy. Just like with feminism, you're defining what you believe is necessary or central to labeling yourself a Christian then when that universal claim is faced with a counterexample, you exclude it. And in fact, "believing in God" is not the foundation to being a Christian, a belief in Jesus Christ as your savior is. Though believing in God is undoubtedly a tenet of Christianity, it is certainly not the criteria by which they proclaim to be Christian. Si…
/r/MensRights12/03/13 03:25 PM
0

I thought this article was really interesting. I liked that her point is really that the onus is on women: "That means that as a man gets more successful, he is better liked by men and women, and as a woman gets more successful, she is less liked by men and women," Sandberg explains. "But I want to be clear: I am not saying that men are too self-confident. That's not the problem. The problem is that women aren't self-confident enough." Basically what's holding women back is not men, or other wom…
/r/MensRights11/03/13 06:17 PM
30

November 19th.
/r/MensRights08/03/13 05:35 PM
29

Happy early International Men's Day! (November 19)
/r/MensRights08/03/13 03:36 PM
3

See but I don't think that's entirely fair. That's like saying to a Christian who supports gay rights, "well you're not really a Christian, then. You're someone who thinks what you believe is Christianity."
/r/MensRights08/03/13 06:22 AM
51

Awesome! I took a similar class in college called "Race, Class, Sex & Sexuality" which was taught by a feminist professor. Once a week someone would give a presentation on marginalized groups and I chose male rape victims. My professor loved it. My class, which had only 3 men, also very much enjoyed the topic. I often hear people's bad experiences in classes like these, so it's very refreshing to hear that someone had a positive experience much like my own was :)
/r/MensRights08/03/13 12:02 AM
1

Except he chose to get married. Those kids have zero choice in any of this.
/r/MensRights28/02/13 08:19 PM
3

You're right, I'll look for the details after work. I think I may even have a copy of the study somewhere :)
/r/MensRights26/02/13 08:44 PM
12

This isn't just a men's issue, this issue is a human rights issue and these woman deserve much much worse they then get. Agreed! I think it's so interesting that for most people (in my experience), someone who falsely accuses another person of lying about rape is considered a horrible victim-blamer, but someone who falsely accuses another person of being a rapist is "better safe than sorry." To me, false accusations, whether they be that a person is a rapist or a person is lying about being rape…
/r/MensRights26/02/13 07:28 PM
6

This study found that women who had been victimized before were seven times more likely to be raped again. It's older, so obviously and unfortunately little to no mention is made of men. Considering that a big factor is speculated to be the reactions of other people after a rape, I'm really curious if this stands true for men as well, considering men typically won't report at all and probably have fewer reactions from family, friends, law enforcement, etc.
/r/MensRights26/02/13 07:17 PM
2

Understandable. I'm just curious about this stuff, and especially people's personal experiences with it so thanks for sharing.
/r/MensRights24/02/13 04:56 AM
1

And here you are, telling me "Hey nothing's wrong with having only half of the parental support you need growing up". Actually no, I didn't, I was simply asking your opinion. I see that happens to be that two parents are better than one, I got you. I personally also grew up without both parents, and I was fine with it. You weren't. It's anecdotal. Whoever choses to take a parent from their child shouldn't have one in the first place. What if they do so because the other parent is abusive? Is sin…
/r/MensRights24/02/13 04:44 AM
1

But why? Do you think kids are better off with two parents? Do they have to be opposite gender? I have a good friend who is raising his daughter single by choice, and he does a fantastic job.
/r/MensRights24/02/13 04:17 AM
0

I said acceptable, not accessible. Girl space is still accessible to be sure, after all, a man can be a stay-at-home dad or a nurse. The issue is that it is still less acceptable to move into girl space, versus moving into boy space. I actually don't believe girl space is any less accessible than boy space, I just have issues with the acceptability of girl space, particularly for men in pink-collar jobs.
/r/MensRights24/02/13 03:00 AM
0

both spheres have positive and negative stereotypes associated with them. Certainly they do, and those were good examples. It still remains, though, that boy space is far and above more acceptable than girl space. Girls who want to be engineers? Great! Girls that want to wear pants and play sports? Awesome! Boys that want to become nurses or stay-at-home dads... ehhhh okay I guess. Being a "pussy" is an insult. Being a "man" or "growing some balls" is not.
/r/MensRights23/02/13 05:53 PM
1

So he said it, how does that somehow leap to the conclusion that this idea comes from his mom? Or that it is permanently damaging? When I was that young I thought "boys are mean" too, because they actually were mean to me. If he's acting outside the accepted sphere of his gender, as I did, I can't imagine boys, or kids in general, are very nice to him. the idea of the men-as-social-pathology paradigm (i.e., 'men are evil') is one of the primary things this subreddit and the Men's Rights movement…
/r/MensRights23/02/13 05:50 PM
0

I guess I meant it doesn't bother me that my parents weren't around as a kid. People will be shocked to hear that we never had "family dinners" but I never saw anything wrong with it. In fact, I would have hated family dinners. We were all too busy. Paternity suits is a tough subject. I see it as, if a man doesn't want kids, he shouldn't have sex. If he doesn't want kids with a particular woman, he shouldn't have sex with her. The same goes for women. If you are absolutely sure you do not want a…
/r/MensRights23/02/13 05:44 PM
1

Well I came exactly from one of those homes, with two working parents and not much time for "family time" and I feel like I turned out fine. Of course, I wish more parents could spend time with their kids but that's not always the case, unfortunately.
/r/MensRights23/02/13 08:26 AM
0

Yes, I have seen this recently when I have (rarely) seen this come up in arguments. It makes a lot of sense. "Girl space" is seen as weaker, not as valid as a choice as moving to "boy space." It's detrimental for so many reasons.
/r/MensRights23/02/13 08:21 AM
1

I totally agree.
/r/MensRights23/02/13 08:19 AM
1

Let's not take things out of context, shall we? But here is what I sadly realized: Within modern girl power, there seems to be a message that girls are better than boys. Boys are BAD. Boys are MEAN. Boys are silly, weak, stupid, clueless, rough. This is a worldview that the author opposes, not at all something she supports or tells her son... in fact it's quite the opposite, so I don't see what you're talking about.
/r/MensRights23/02/13 08:19 AM
1

She went through IVF via a donor. She planned on being a single mom from the time she decided to get pregnant, apparently.
/r/MensRights23/02/13 08:16 AM
5

Well, some women. It's not nearly as accepted as, say, "tomboys" but why shouldn't it be?
/r/MensRights23/02/13 08:15 AM
0

I have a friend who is a single dad by choice. Sure he didn't "squirt mini-humans" but what's the problem with that? I see none, seeing as he's a fantastic dad.
/r/MensRights23/02/13 08:13 AM
-1

Why is it bad to be a single parent by choice?
/r/MensRights23/02/13 08:12 AM
6

Very interesting, that makes a good deal of sense. I have an uncle who is raising two kids with his partner and it never occurred to me that they may be limiting their daughter by not exposing her to a female role model. I only ever thought about the awkwardness when she hits puberty. I think I probably never thought about it because it's so easy for girls to be in boy space but not vice versa. Still, it may be a good idea for her to have a woman in her life. I dislike the notion of raising a bo…
/r/MensRights23/02/13 12:30 AM
6

What "men are evil" thing?
/r/MensRights23/02/13 12:22 AM
7

Thanks for the reply! Just for reference, she's not a lesbian but a single mom by choice. I find this really interesting, why do you think kids need same-gendered role models? I can think of a few reasons now, like fitting in (father's day, etc.), sex/sexuality and puberty advice, that kind of thing. I'm very curious to hear your opinion.
/r/MensRights22/02/13 11:23 PM
3

Twin studies are quite compelling.
/r/MensRights22/02/13 11:14 PM
0

She's a single mom by choice, no dad in the picture or ever was.
/r/MensRights22/02/13 11:14 PM
40

She's a single mom by choice.
/r/MensRights22/02/13 11:10 PM
11

I'm just curious, but do you believe that gay couples can adequately raise children? I only ask because this idea that children need same-gendered role models in their lives is something I never thought about.
/r/MensRights22/02/13 11:07 PM
23

There are also a lot of double standards when it comes to proclaiming, "girls can do anything!" I have seen parents celebrate that their daughters play with trucks or pick out boxers as underpants. Look! See! Nothing holding this girl back! This sort of celebration does not happen when a boy picks up a doll or Dora undies. I've been seeing a lot more of this lately and I LOVE IT. I'm so glad we are finally looking at "girl space" and "boy space" and recognizing that while girls have been increas…
/r/MensRights22/02/13 11:01 PM
1

That's really good to hear, seriously thank you :) I too enjoy level headed conversations, especially when I learn something new! Have a great weekend!
/r/MensRights22/02/13 10:07 PM
1

Yeah that sounds completely fair to me.
/r/MensRights22/02/13 09:56 PM
0

Yeah I agree that he should be putting in as much as the exes, which should be about average. I can speak from experience though, it is a strange feeling when you're living like an average family and your father is out living like a millionaire. It didn't screw me up or anything, but it was weird growing up.
/r/MensRights22/02/13 09:31 PM
0

That means that the exes should be contributing as well. To the child support? I mean, seeing as he's not paying anything, I can only assume the exes are contributing all the child support. I think child support should be based on what's necessary for the kids, not his income or his potential income. It absolutely should. But that gets tricky, I realize. Some people have a certain standard of living and others don't. So who gets to decide which standard of living the children should have? It's t…
/r/MensRights22/02/13 08:59 PM
4

Those with money can afford to protect it and keep it to themselves, those without have it taken by force. This is exactly true. "If you have the capital, you don't do the punishment" as they say. It's why guys like the one in the article can get away with this kind of stuff, but people earning a living wage can not.
/r/MensRights22/02/13 08:38 PM
-2

Someone in here pointed out that often the reason the amount is now this high is due to fees and costs for not paying the first (and second, third...) time. If he was making $500,000 to $600,000 a year, $120K for your kids doesn't seem that unreasonable to me...
/r/MensRights22/02/13 08:35 PM
-3

I see bankrupting yourself because you can't afford to have kids as selfish. Not saying that's what this guy did because I don't have the whole story. But seriously, people need to cut it out with the having kids they can't pay for. Birth control is everywhere people, use it.
/r/MensRights22/02/13 08:05 PM
0

Yeah I see that now, sorry I was confused by your typo. I don't think he's a deadbeat. Or, at least, I don't have enough information to know that. But I also don't have enough to know that, like you were saying, he wanted custody or any of that. We have about as much evidence of him being a stand-up father otherwise as we do that he is a deadbeat.
/r/MensRights22/02/13 07:44 PM
-5

No you didn't... Do you know this man PURPOSELY left his wives? But I do see it was probably a typo. But how do we know that he wanted custody? I didn't see that in the article...
/r/MensRights22/02/13 07:32 PM
-8

I don't know if he's an asshole and never said he was... because I don't know the whole story. You say he purposely left his wives, and kids? I did not know that, but I don't know how it changes anything. Personally, yes, if I had children to support I would absolutely forfeit everything I had for them, even if I could not see them. They are still my children, after all. And even if I wanted to be selfish and leave them, they need to be supported monetarily by someone. To refuse would be the ult…
/r/MensRights22/02/13 07:26 PM
-17

Well that escalated quickly. I can't help but wonder why he didn't pay the child support, then. If his life is more important than his kids, he shouldn't have had kids. I was a kid in this situation once, it's not fun.
/r/MensRights22/02/13 07:19 PM
-18

The worst part is the only one losing in this situation, are his three children...
/r/MensRights22/02/13 06:59 PM
70

This why the phrase "It is expensive to be poor" makes so much sense.
/r/MensRights22/02/13 06:58 PM
18

Wow, so sad. A good reminder of the consequences of victim blaming.
/r/MensRights30/01/13 05:12 PM
10

When he explained he was changing his name due to marriage, he was told 'that only works for women,'" he said. As a Floridian and a woman who does not plan to change my name, this double standard pisses me off to no end. Why is it so unthinkable that a man would want to change his last name? The fact that in my own state, my husband could be accused of fraud for taking my name is bullshit.
/r/MensRights29/01/13 05:43 PM
5

Well firstly, five years probation for statutory rape is bullshit. But I have to say, isn't saying "a handslap compared to what a male teacher would have gotten" kind of relative? I mean, I've known of many male teachers who slept with their students and not only did they never see a day in court, but the schools (one of them mine) covered the whole thing up. It just doesn't seem to me that we can definitively compare them when it's so relative. Maybe it's just me. That woman should be in jail t…
/r/MensRights23/01/13 09:28 PM
2

My uni had one of these. It didn't get torn down though. Another popular one that semester was a "write something you never want to hear again" wall. I wrote: "circumcision has health benefits" T'was not too well received, but no one tore down the wall over it.
/r/MensRights23/01/13 08:29 PM
1

Especially by females and feminists. What tangible evidence is there of this? I mean I could sit here and say, from experience, that being a female computer engineer is "one of the most discriminated against professional people in the world" but I know that would be completely anecdotal, and also not true. My observation And my observation has been just the opposite. I grew up hearing constantly that we need more men in traditionally female jobs. I didn't hear much of the opposite (we need more …
/r/MensRights23/01/13 03:53 PM
-1

Switch to private school! Where the female teachers are fired for so much as having a pregnancy scare before marriage and the male teachers are having full blown relationships with their students! My school sucked...
/r/MensRights22/01/13 08:33 PM
0

Well feminists also point out the discrepancy of men in pink collar jobs and encourage not only men in those jobs but the acceptance of men who choose to do those jobs. So I think they have a problem with any field having big gender differences.
/r/MensRights22/01/13 08:30 PM
3

I don't think anyone is arguing that having ovaries over testicles makes you somehow less inclined to computers, and therefore we must encourage those with the biological lack of interest in a subject to pursue that subject via extra credit, what have you. I think the problem is a social issue not a biological one. Women aren't encouraged to be "good at computers" the way men are, so the goal is to be more encouraging as a way of bending the social stigma. Anyway that's just my take, I still thi…
/r/MensRights22/01/13 08:28 PM
1

My school is a very small private school! No one who spoke up or participated in D-Day was labeled a misogynist! Our gender studies department was all about it, and NOW who put on the vagina monologues was more than willing to limit the activities to a part of campus with no complaint or labeling anyone anything. All I'm saying is you never know, but if you decide to do nothing, you can guarantee nothing will change.
/r/MensRights20/12/12 03:05 PM
9

You should at least try! What if Rosa Parks had thought, "eh it's not worth it I'll just move to the back"? Also comes to mind: "you miss 100% of the chances you don't take"
/r/MensRights19/12/12 09:20 PM
10

Have you told your administration about it? I ask because my university limited V-Day celebrations, advertisements, etc. to a specific area of campus after some students (mostly female) complained. We did it with no hesitation. I am saddened that these people were not allowed to continue their P-Day spoof, but to be completely fair it doesn't sound like they did much planning or notifying of the administration first. Even V-Day and the Vagina Monologues requires much notice and planning so that …
/r/MensRights19/12/12 09:14 PM
1

Hey, big favor, could you help me find this tweet? I can't find anything about "white males" and I looked through all his articles. Please help! I really want to use the comments in a blog I'm writing today!
/r/MensRights18/12/12 03:39 PM
1

That's not men in general who are leaning toward that. Well we can't objectively prove this one way or the other can we? I mean from my own personal experience, I know of only one guy who likes "curvy" women, and he gets ridiculed from all of our friends for it all the time. The men I know constantly say things about their girlfriends like "if she gains even two pounds, I swear I'm done" and like to put down the women we know who weigh more than 120lbs or so ("[girl-friend] wouldn't go jogging i…
/r/MensRights18/12/12 12:53 AM
1

Michael Moore is a self-righteous, obtuse prick. He's like a bad fetish for the shallow liberal sheep, so that's not shocking. Thanks for the response though, I'm wondering if anyone credible has been spewing bullshit like that? I'd love to get some links to these blogs too (if you have a chance), my searching has been futile.
/r/MensRights18/12/12 12:45 AM
2

Thanks, this is exactly what I was going to say. I was like, I'm quite certain "rape culture" was not coined by feminists! But yes, in any event, this is the origin, and it has been since adopted and used by many different groups including feminists.
/r/MensRights18/12/12 12:33 AM
1

Oh I understand, I was just speaking about my own experience. That's really very unfortunate that you know people who are willing to treat rape culture in such a way. Rape is trivialized for both men and women, albeit in different ways. It's all part of rape culture.
/r/MensRights17/12/12 11:35 PM
3

Quite honestly, this is the first time I've been informed that rape culture is about women. I guess I would have expected that from the feminists not the MRAs! When I first heard the term "rape culture" it was in the exact context as above: referring to men who are told they can't be raped. Interesting.
/r/MensRights17/12/12 11:27 PM
0

Interesting take, my experience is just a bit different from yours. My sister is pansexual in practice but identifies as androgynous in gender. She has had relationships with many transgendered people who feel certain proclivities toward one gender or another, for some that includes in sex also, and so they choose to physically transition. For others it doesn't include their sex organs (i.e. her ex is MtF living as a gay woman but who doesn't plan to operate), and for some, like my sister, gende…
/r/MensRights17/12/12 10:46 PM
6

I thought that a societal pattern of trivializing both victims and aggressors is rape culture? Every definition I've seen harps on the trivialization of rape as one of if not the biggest factor. That's all rape culture is, ways in which we trivialize, normalize or minimize rape. Telling men they can't be raped because men always want sex does exactly that.
/r/MensRights17/12/12 10:21 PM
9

Honest question: what about male victims? Does this imply that men who aren't taken seriously when reporting rape because of the attitude that "men always want sex and if he doesn't he's gay" doesn't exist?
/r/MensRights17/12/12 09:57 PM
2

The "most popular kid" in class was our class president who was also our valedictorian, got a perfect ACT score and was president of the drama club, not even close to being a jock of any kind. The most hated kid in school? The douchebag captain of the baseball team. He couldn't even get a date to prom, and we are not a small school.
/r/MensRights17/12/12 09:29 PM
-1

You may very well be right, just as women may actually prefer "nerds" to "jocks" but unfortunately that's not the public perception. The media will still portray women as always picking the jock or the bad boy over the nerd, and will continue to show that men prefer skinnier women. An article from Men's Health from a week ago cites men as preferring women with narrow hips, small feet and long legs. The girl in the article's photo is not what I would consider "heavy." I think we should be just as…
/r/MensRights17/12/12 09:18 PM
-1

Wait, who exactly is "blaming the fact that he was male"? Edit: I'm serious, that's super fucked up, can anyone give me an answer please?!
/r/MensRights17/12/12 09:07 PM
-1

This is true. Consequently, femininity is in large extent determined by what men "want" (or are taught to "want"). But we have made big leaps in encouraging women not to fall prey to the gender conditioning that leads them to eating disorders and other destructive behavior. I don't think it's unrealistic to do the same for men. People are not saying, "tell me when you've found a solution to men's preference for the skinny model over the chubby girl" in response to conquering women's body issues.…
/r/MensRights17/12/12 08:53 PM
1

Private school? It really wasn't any different from a normal school, but the "nerds" were the most popular kids in class. The shunned students were always the ones with low grades, sometimes they were also athletes. It just wasn't that black and white. Do people really go to schools like that?
/r/MensRights17/12/12 08:42 PM
1

This is so relative. I don't know any women who "prefer the high school jock over the docile nerd."
/r/MensRights17/12/12 06:49 PM
1

There's really no denying that men tend to be more violent. The sheer statistics of male perpetrated crimes tells us that. I just don't believe it should be encourages (via gender conditioning) that violence is a way to "prove" or reaffirm your masculinity.
/r/MensRights17/12/12 06:28 PM
0

Oh! This makes more sense. The standard gender roles do have deep roots in biology, I know that. I'm talking along the lines of being born "a man" or "a woman." I just don't believe that's the case. I think a man can be born "male" but identify female, complete with all the biologically "standard" traits that being "female" implies.
/r/MensRights17/12/12 06:13 PM
1

I never said "men are conditioned to be violent" because I don't believe that to be the case. I don't know if men are "biologically more violent and aggressive than women" because I have never studied or seen a study showing this to be true. All I said is that masculinity is too often linked to violence. As in, you have to be violent to prove your masculinity. Just think about it. Is it "acceptable" to walk away from a fight? Not usually. Backing down from a fight or violent situation is likely …
/r/MensRights17/12/12 06:03 PM
-2

I don't know about a "blank slate hypothesis" but I base my belief that you are not born with a gender on my experiences talking to transgendered people. These are people who were born with one set of sex organs but identify with the "opposite" gender. I don't believe sex and gender are the same thing. You can be born male (sex) but identify as a woman (gender). Does that make sense?
/r/MensRights17/12/12 05:52 PM
0

I was thinking of trans people as well, as all of the ones I know felt the pressure to conform to their gender to a greater extreme than their non-trans peers, but it's interesting to note that the FtM trans people I know say it wasn't unacceptable as a kid to be a "tomboy" versus the MtF trans people I know who were relentlessly ridiculed for doing anything outside "acceptable" boy territory. It's more important to show them that just because they don't fit the model to a T doesn't mean they ar…
/r/MensRights17/12/12 05:42 PM
0

I just don't think genders are inherently distinct, or have any inherent traits. I think gender is a hodgepodge of things, among them, a personal choice. I don't believe you are born with a gender, only a sex, so for me I think of "identifying with your gender" as something I would want to be gender neutral so as not to put pressure on, for instance, boys who want to play with dolls. I could be misunderstanding what you mean about being able to identify with your gender though :/
/r/MensRights17/12/12 05:26 PM
0

This is interesting. I think you're right about "traditionally masculine" traits being moved to "gender neutral" but I've never actually seen that as a bad thing. The bad thing I see is the willingness of society to move "traditionally masculine" traits to a gender neutral grey area that makes it acceptable for a person of any gender to conform to or have those traits, but not vice versa. As in, girls are encouraged to be "traditionally masculine" but boys are still not allowed to be feminine (y…
/r/MensRights17/12/12 05:13 PM
0

Why is violence and harboring serious weapons considered a manly trait? The media is portraying masculinity as something only attained through feeling masculine with a gun(s). Makes me sad. My 2 cents: masculinity is a pre-defined gender role to which young men are excepted to conform. The pressure to be "masculine" or a "manly man" is especially detrimental when masculinity is linked to violence. Boys are bombarded with images of guns, war, and violence and simultaneously expected to constantly…
/r/MensRights17/12/12 04:58 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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