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PercentageDazzling41 Archive

View 0 posts and 239 comments by PercentageDazzling41 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

Yeah, the «women conditioned men into submission» part is propaganda, but I can see how someone gets there. A lot of boys grow up hearing «be nice, be respectful, be chivalrous» and then become men and realize those things don’t automatically earn attraction or respect. Sometimes being overly accommodating even gets you labeled a «simp» or gets you taken advantage of. That disconnect is real. The mistake is turning it into a conspiracy instead of recognizing that boys are often given a very inco…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/08/26 07:06 PM

I think you're still making this far more individual than what I'm talking about. Nowhere did I say women are responsible for teaching adult men social skills. I'm asking why so many people are reaching adulthood missing the same basic social information in the first place. That's a systemic question. Parents socialize children. Schools socialize children. Peer groups socialize children. Society reinforces norms constantly. Certain things are supposed to be learned through years of interaction, …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/26 05:57 AM
3

What no, I don't need lube for that. Like spraying creeky door hinges with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/26 05:39 AM
1

Saying «I don’t need to prove my masculinity» and then immediately citing how many women you’ve made cum is kind of hilarious. You didn’t transcend the framework. You just picked a metric where you feel like you’re winning. And none of that stops someone from disrespecting you or perceiving you as emasculated. «I don’t care» changes your reaction to it. It doesn’t erase the social perception.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/26 01:30 AM

Who said anything about requiring women to put in labor first? I don't think social skills work like a normal «right answer / wrong answer» subject where you can just read the manual and suddenly know how to function socially. A lot of it is intuitive. Pattern recognition. Timing. Reading tone. Knowing what matters before you even know why it matters. Books can explain pieces of that after the fact, but they're usually explaining something that assumes a bunch of preliminary social knowledge alr…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/26 01:27 AM

I think you're misunderstanding what I'm saying. I'm not saying «you're wrong because you can't understand other perspectives.» That would actually be closer to the ad hominem you're accusing me of. I'm saying your argument itself keeps assuming that other people operate the way you do. «Just Google it.» «Be your own honest evaluator.» «If you've learned anything outside of formal education, you're capable.» Okay. Capable ≠ equally equipped. People don't know what they don't know. They might not…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 09:03 PM

I think this entire argument is being shaped by your own understanding of intimacy. You keep saying your definition is just «the definition.» It isn't. Intimacy being deep closeness is the definition. «If you can easily walk away, it wasn't real intimacy» is something you're adding to it. Those aren't the same thing. You can be deeply close to someone • know them intimately • share vulnerability • genuinely care about them, and still be capable of walking away if the relationship stops working. …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 09:01 PM
2

You can believe whatever you want internally. That doesn’t give you control over how other people perceive you. Confidence can stop you from feeling emasculated. It cannot magically undo emasculation in someone else’s eyes. Once a social perception is established, «I know who I am» doesn’t automatically rewrite it.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 06:47 PM
7

Idk what you're talking about reddit has some of the most solid advice. It was on reddit where I learned WD-40 is not a lubricant. I think someones looks might be too inherently subjective for good advice.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 04:23 PM
1

It's fundamentally impossible to maintain the perception of masculinity without caring what people think when it's inherently subtractive. Requiring active avoidance of traits labeled as feminine or weak. The idea that you can is a performative paradox.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 04:16 PM
3

Being supportive to others isn't an obligation. If you're not able, don't do it. You really pick & choose which people around you to support based on their gender?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 04:11 PM
1

With how precarious masculinity you always have to prove it somehow. Or prevent it from being snatched away.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 04:05 PM
1

Whole lot of mischaracterization. Intimacy is a deep sense of closeness. There is no real intimacy if it's so easy to walk away. This is the value I was referring to. Not trickery. Why do you seek so desperately to have sex with people who are a detriment to your life? I'm not sure how you got there from "It is very easy for me to walk away from people if they become a detriment to my life" Ridiculous strawman I made up Based on your view on intimacy I would assume that you believe intimacy and …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/26 02:37 AM
1

The issue comes when a man isn't trying yet is still unlikable. This is when "just be yourself" advice is useless & harmful. It's one thing to be able to relax enough to get out your head. Another thing to lack the social knowledge to interpret things correctly and have a positive interaction. I'm most relaxed when I feel competent in my social skills. Would be completely stressed when I had no idea what was going on.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 05:06 AM
1

Lol, an encyclopedia, are you serious? Maybe you have trouble understanding things outside your perspective. I will admit seeing things from a reduced mindset really tests the limits of my cognitive empathy. Like how I would see things if my IQ was lower. Or when giving nutrional advice to someone that doesn't read nutrition labels.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 05:00 AM
0

That's you're personal value, not a universal standard. It is very easy for me to walk away from people if they become a detriment to my life. Family & friends that decided not to respect me are mere memories. I could never let how long I've known someone be the main reason I continue to interact with them. There are people that have known each other for years and never achieve a deep connection. Having an intimate connection is all about intention, not how much time elapsed. Women are perfectly…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 02:30 AM
1

Mutual understanding & respect is begging to you? Sheesh. You know where to find information on black issues. But why would I expect a non black person to do that?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 02:07 AM
6

I don't think that makes it bad advice for them. It just means they have to accomplish smaller, highly related sub-goals first. Like you can't run before you can walk. But that doesn't make the desire to run a bad goal. It's important to use any and all motivation for improvement where ever it may come from. If man wants to get jacked to pull more women, what's the harm? Even if it doesn't result in more women at least dude is now physically stronger and healthier. It costs nothing to say "maybe…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 01:42 AM
0

My attitude was never "had sex, doesn't matter." Sex just isn't inherently that important to me or automatically tied to commitment. Usually the desire to have sex is mutual, and honestly I've often been with women who wanted it more than I did. I never have been nor will I ever be fake intimate. My openness & depth to intimacy doesn't change with attachment. I also don't think you can necessarily tell from the outcome whether a man "used" a woman for sex or genuinely liked her but eventually re…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 01:34 AM
1

And this is coming from someone who is extremely autodidactic. I taught myself programming in multiple languages, Linux, command-line work, server administration, plumbing, carpentry, electrical work. I even learned how to train a Belgian Malinois from basically zero because I had to. So no, I'm not saying people can't teach themselves. I'm saying "just Google it" is not a serious answer. People have different strengths, time, energy, and starting points. And becoming a "better person" is especi…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 01:19 AM
1

How can you say that when you don't even know what "the way they want" actually is? I think you're misunderstanding how support works. I don't exactly get to opt out of caring about racial issues either. I'm Black. But that still doesn't mean strangers owe my movement unconditional support, especially while being told their criticism doesn't matter. And "you'll benefit from feminism" isn't really an answer. Benefit how? In actual words, not some vague metaphor. What specifically is feminism doin…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 01:09 AM
2

You've been bamboozled into thinking you're the problem. Your not, they are. What a terrible group of people to call friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 12:50 AM
1

Yeah that's messed up but the solution isn't to keep you a secret. The solution was for that guy to tell his friends not to disrespect you like that. The solution was for his friends to mind their business & not be so rude. Even the most attractive people are not immune to harsh critism.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 08:48 PM
1

Lol, realistically, only someone who's already somewhat competent with home repairs is even going to consider touching that. Ask your mom or sister to handle a structural repair and see how far "just Google it" gets them. You're seriously underestimating how much background knowledge it takes just to know what to search for. Most people aren't autodidacts. They learn through school, guidance, and experience. And social skills are even harder because they don't exist in isolation like home repair…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 08:25 PM
1

It's weird how women can be fine with a man considered conventionally unattractive but a man can't do the same with a woman. Men have to gracefully accept being called medium ugly while just calling a woman average will get you crucified.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 08:07 PM
2

You seem like a perfectly rational person. As such it wouldn't be fair to call anything you said stupid or ignorant. I honestly believe these misunderstandings are caused by the systems we all live under. Patrichary, oligarchy, capitalism. I don't think these things are so complex we can't figure them out on our own. Yet, so many people are completely puzzled. Men & women aren't so different yet many women don't believe men like & need things like reassurance, emotional safety, and feeling heard…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 06:42 PM
1

That's the issue though. A lot of people don't even realize when they're reinforcing patriarchy. Men and women can both reproduce gender norms they were taught without consciously choosing them. You can't expect people to reject something they haven't even learned to recognize yet. That's why understanding has to come before blame. Currently there's no reason for a man to embrace feminism. The latest wave of feminism is hardly intersectional at all, primarily focused on equality exclusively for …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 06:15 PM
1

I think the answer is to give men some of that same systemic grace too. Women are shaped by how they're raised, but men are too. That doesn't remove responsibility, it just means we should try to understand both sides. Without mutual understanding, mutual empathy is impossible to build.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 05:56 PM
1

I think the way you're trying to simplify this is lazy. You're compressing a problem with 20 different working parts into one sentence and then calling that "actionable advice." "Learn social skills." Okay... which ones? Emotional regulation? Reading body language? Conversation skills? Social awareness? Confidence? Flirting? Knowing when someone is uncomfortable? Knowing when to escalate? Those are all separate skills that can have separate problems and separate solutions. It's like telling some…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 05:43 PM
1

I think mononormativity puts way too much pressure on every connection to become a relationship. Men absorb most of that pressure because it's seen as something men withhold or decide. Desire can exist without commitment. Commitment rarely exists without desire. A good date that goes nowhere wasn't automatically a waste. Good sex that doesn't turn into a relationship wasn't automatically a waste either. Calling it a "waste of time" is basically saying everything we did together meant nothing unl…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 05:38 PM
1

That's categorically false. It's the most attractive thing hearing a woman be self-confident and not constantly compare themselve to others. Not the "I'm a 10" bs. Just being able to separate looks from identity. It's so painful being with an attractive woman who thinks they're ugly. No amount of reassurance can fill that void. Eventually I start to believe them.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 04:52 PM
0

I'm bewildered you decided to compare making dinner to how to be a decent human being. You don't need to understand anything about culinary to make a meal. Can just blindly follow the directions from a 30 min YT video and get good results. Try doing the same thing with people and you'll just appear as fake or insincere. Not to mention the hours of emotional intelligence training required. You can be a decent, or even good person—and still be unlikable.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 03:35 AM
8

"Cum dumpster" is crazy. I think there's too many men not getting laid for this to be true. And incels tend to say a lot of fallacious shit. I'm usually grateful when a woman I want to sleep with—also wants to sleep with me. Unless she's literally throwing herself at me or lacks self worth. I think the issue is men don't need attachment to have sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 02:13 AM
7

I tend to drop women that think this way. If you don't believe in yourself, why should I? There's always going to be someone "better" in some way.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 01:58 AM
10

To disagree with no explanation is absolutely pointless. Very strange way to communicate.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 01:48 AM
6

Then do it to win the argument. Online discussions are not one-on-one conversations. I personally learn a lot combing through knowledgeable debates. I think explaining your position to change someone's mind is one of the worst reasons for doing so. Everybody can't be correct. It's your choice to be a defeatist.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 01:46 AM
17

I don't understand how men will allegedly fuck anything with legs while simultaneously only choosing the youngest, skinniest, prettiest, and bubbliest of women across the land. I promise it's social media and diabolically clever marketing. Creating a problem out of thin air to drive sales for plastic surgery and cosmetics. It's insidious how effective it is. To the point where you suspect it's men, not them.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 12:04 AM
2

It absolutely isn't. It's as useless as "be good".
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 01:42 PM
1

"I was raised to be a servant to men" is an explanation for why you entered the dynamic. It doesn't magically erase your agency once you recognize it. Men are socialized into patriarchal roles too, yet we're still expected to examine them and change. That standard should apply universally. If you're consciously compensating for a man's refusal to contribute and maintaining the arrangement, complicity is a perfectly relevant concept. You don't have to be the person who created a gender norm to pa…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 01:41 PM
1

Calling every relationship that doesn’t end in marriage a “waste of time” is basically mononormative, outcome-based thinking. It treats relationships like they only have value if they successfully complete the relationship escalator. A connection can still have social, sexual, emotional, or developmental value even if it ends. Termination doesn’t retroactively make the relationship meaningless.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 07:08 AM
1

People generally become more generous when their generosity is recognized rather than treated as an obligation. And heterosexual dating has several traditional expectations placed on men that are particularly vulnerable to being treated as obligations rather than generosity. With that said I hard disagree about reciprocity coming later. There's no good reason to do so as appreciation itself is already a form of reciprocity. Calling it a "dance" conveniently obfuscates the actual expectations—not…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 07:01 AM
6

There's tons of advice that can significantly increase a man's chances. "Be decent" just isn't pragmatic or actionable.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 06:36 AM
2

It's like women lose all agency when it comes to marriage. How do you get to the point of marrying someone who doesn't do any chores. And stay married to that person?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 06:43 PM
1

That’s the part I reject. Anything that doesn’t end in a relationship gets reframed as “wasting her time,” as if dating is a contract where a man owes you a relationship if you invest enough time. He doesn’t. Dating is literally the process of finding out whether someone is a long-term fit. Sometimes the answer is no. That’s not manipulation. That’s not theft. Women are not owed a relationship just because they wanted one.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 06:38 PM
2

Yup, you'd have to be morally bankrupt to believe that.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 04:50 AM
1

I wouldn't expect a rapist to have a strong moral compass. Or any criminal for that matter.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 04:32 AM
-1

Ime you can be honest, be upfront, and they will still be upset if you don't pick them. It takes time to determine if they're a good long term partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 04:31 AM
0

I’m genuinely fascinated by how you think calling it a “preference” magically removes the entitlement. Those categories aren’t opposites. You literally said “men should provide monetarily.” That is an expectation about what men should provide you because they’re men. “I won’t force him” doesn’t change that. And saying “I never said he owes me” while simultaneously saying men should pay is just pretending context and implication don’t exist.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 04:27 AM
0

This isn’t me “projecting beliefs” onto you. It’s literally just understanding the definition of entitlement and being intellectually honest about how your own standard fits it. Saying “no it doesn’t” over and over isn’t an argument. And the “men should provide because women bear reproductive responsibilities” thing is at least an argument, but it still doesn’t explain why a man you’re merely dating already owes you money before any reproductive burden even exists. I like how I'm suddenly I’m “d…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 11:36 PM
0

I think it's because of hypocognition. There is no language to describe the things women pleasure. A woman would have to explain it from scratch. Which is exhausting.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 11:31 PM
0

It’s not that black & white. You can like someone, enjoy the connection, sleep with them, and still know they’re not someone you want long-term. Sex doesn’t automatically require attachment. And “just find women who want casual sex” acts like that pool is huge. It isn’t. Mononormativity is still the overwhelming default.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 11:29 PM
0

Your own definition kills your argument. Entitlement is the belief that you’re inherently deserving of a privilege, benefit, or special treatment. You literally expect a man to provide you a financial benefit because he’s the man, then judge him as insufficiently “generous” if he doesn’t. Then you keep using comparisons that actually prove my point. Wanting someone who can cook or clean isn’t entitlement. Believing a woman should cook and clean for you because she’s a woman absolutely is. Wantin…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:13 PM
0

Some women miss that their attitude directly affects how generous a man feels like being. Not wanting to be obligated to pay doesn’t mean he isn’t generous. If he’s socially pressured to pay or else be judged, you can hardly call that generosity. That’s like calling a woman generous for cooking and cleaning because she feels it’s her duty as a woman. And “what do you bring to the table?” is a completely valid question. The phrase itself has just been poisoned by obnoxious internet discourse. Peo…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:04 PM
1

Entitlement isn't expecting anything from a partner. It's expecting a benefit based on category rather than exchange. You expect men to pay because they're men, not because of anything he specifically gave you. If I expected a woman to cook simply because she's a woman—and cut her for refusing, that's entitled too. Same structure, same problem. You're both bringing your time and company to the same table. So what makes his side of it also require paying? If the presence is mutual, either you thi…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 04:31 PM
-1

You keep confusing “I’m allowed to have this standard” with “therefore the standard can’t be entitled.” Those are completely different claims. Entitlement doesn’t require you to force anybody. “I expect men to pay for me, and if they don’t, they’re disqualified” is still an expectation that another person provide you a one-sided benefit. You’re absolutely free to walk away. Freedom to enforce a standard does not make the standard fair. That’s the entire point you keep dodging. Calling it a “pref…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 11:02 AM
0

You’re still just relabeling it. “I prefer someone who cooks” is about what they bring to a relationship. “You must pay for me to qualify” is a one-sided financial expectation. Being happily married doesn’t make the logic any less entitled. "I’m happily married" is such a weird response to a fairness critique. The question was never whether the arrangement benefits you. It was whether the expectation is fair to the person expected to pay. Other people exist. And criticizing that isn’t “hate.” Ha…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 10:44 AM
1

That comparison is fallacious. “I want to be attracted to my partner” describes compatibility. “Pay my share or get rejected” assigns someone else an obligation. Calling both “preferences” doesn’t magically make them equivalent.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 07:15 AM
2

Calling someone’s refusal to meet an entitled expectation "incompatibility" is just sanitizing entitlement.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 06:46 AM
4

From a woman’s perspective, it’s “incompatibility.” From a man’s, when the same one-sided standard is widespread, it starts to feel like an entry fee. Different preferences can make two people incompatible, but calling the demand itself “incompatibility” glosses over the entitlement of expecting someone else to fund your participation.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 02:48 AM
3

Traditional here just means the man has to pay for a shared experience. Which isn't inherently bad. Becomes bad when there are social consequences for not adhering to to rigid, one-sided expectations. Some men's acceptance of it doesn't make it any less of an obligation.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 10:40 PM
-1

I think this is exactly what OP is talking about based on his 2nd paragraph: "Letting women pay for themselves on the other hand is a great filtering system because you find out almost immediately if you're dealing with a self centered/entitled woman..." What I was getting at was the mechanism underneath the entitlement, not saying appreciation has to come after some huge display of effort. And I probably wouldn’t make it completely binary. There is a middle state where something just becomes no…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 10:32 PM
1

I did conflate standards and expectations, but here it’s basically a distinction without a difference. Either way, the man still has to meet them. And the part I think gets skipped is reciprocity. If you’re asking someone to accept children, less flexibility, more responsibility, and unusually high requirements, what are you bringing that makes that tradeoff worthwhile for him? Not even financially. Maybe you’re extremely supportive, an amazing cook, affectionate, peaceful to be around, financia…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 10:25 PM
2

I don't think that's true at all. The barrier to sex is just a lot lower for men. When looking at things long term it evens out. There's also this assumption where women always have the most amazing personality that gets snuck into these type of conversations. Minimum: “I'm attracted to her, we have sexual chemistry, she's pleasant enough.” Ideal: “She's extremely attractive, we have amazing sex, she's hilarious, intelligent, affectionate, trustworthy, shares my interests, and I could talk to he…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 10:20 PM
2

To me that sounds like saying «Women should vet for men that don't beat them.» It's like yeah, or we could be better people.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 10:07 PM
2

It's not really about the money. For me, a woman being willing to split the bill says she doesn't feel entitled to blindly benefit from gender norms. Like, we both wanted to be here. Why is one person automatically financially responsible for it? And if you frame it as consideration instead, that matters. A woman actually caring about how much a man is spending on her, even when caring costs her something, is the kind of thing men remember. I think what you gave off was more hyper-independence t…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 09:54 PM
1

They're never talking about the same woman. There are single mothers with extremely high standards & expectations while refusing to accept how their children can be burdensome. There are single mothers with low standards & take full accountability. Somehow they only hear the loudest and forgot single moms used to be considered easy. Personally I think it's messed to up to put single mothers on a podcast and aggressively try to debate them into admitting how their kids & baby father(s) can be a b…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 09:16 PM
2

There’s an asymmetry in how we judge which traits someone values most. A man can value both personality and physical attraction, but if physical traits rank higher, he’s treated as shallow or morally suspect. It’s not an absence of value for personality. The issue is that personality isn’t being valued more. And even within physical attraction, valuing a woman’s body is often treated as less legitimate than valuing her face, even though a body can be beautiful too.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 08:00 PM
1

No one is forcing women to provide that value. You could choose not to do it. Gender roles are not law.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 04:23 PM
2

All women have to do is acknowledge the extra burden men take on by having to initiate. A smidgen of appreciation instead of entitlement.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 04:17 PM
3

Miami is different. If you have a yacht, then it's warranted.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 04:13 PM
1

The mistake is thinking you need to be the perfect little social butterfly to attract women, you don't. Just be somebody likeable. I don't think you'd only be friends with people that are outgoing, confident, charismatic, and witty. Fun to be around is usually enough. Live a life that you feel good enough about to pull other people into. Be outgoing because you like to go out. Be confident because you're competent. Be witty because you like wit. Be interesting, and show interest in others. Be ha…
/r/seduction03/08/26 06:10 PM

I'm saying I think your self-worth is part of the reason why you didn't need/want those things.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:22 PM

My cousin goes for free drinks & validation. I think self-worth plays a role.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:17 PM
5

It's definitely subconscious. Most women can't even think about this being a bias clearly because of cognitive dissonance is so strong. To understand what makes the preference biphobic is to unpack their attraction to masculinity. Currently heterosexuality and masculinity are fused. It's a lot to unpack if you've never thought about your preferences in depth.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 04:12 PM
1

Women approaching men will solve some of the modern dating issues. It's a bit entitled to expect things you're unwilling to do yourself. Not you personally, but there's very little empathy for the extra labor required upfront from men. To the degree where if a man doesn't initiate, nothing happens. If things were more reciprocal there'd also be more mutual understanding. The biggest advantage women have from my perspective is that they won't be assumed to be a violent criminal. And don't have to…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 03:48 PM
1

There's a credibility gap where men are denied the nuance of platonic physical appreciation.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/26 08:38 PM
6

For most men, any form of visual interest is immediately collapsed into both categories because that is the only way our interest is ever validated or acknowledged.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/26 08:29 PM

That's a defeatist attitude and not true. Besides, it has utility. Not only is this an extension of feminist critical theory through the use of counterfactual thought analysis. But, counter-normative thinking in general is good for driving critical thinking.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/25 06:50 PM

That's why I would ruminate on how different relationships could be if things like the Madonna-whore complex didn't exist and modesty wasn't weaponized.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/25 11:45 PM
7

I like to imagine what life would be like if women didn't have to exercise so much caution around sex. Or weren't punished socially for acting lustfully.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/25 08:39 AM

I think this is woman's biggest flaw today. They'll victimize themselves for more reasons than they should. And society justifies tf out of it. Attractive women will blame the fact that they're attractive why men only want to sleep with them. It's never because their personality might be impossible to deal with for an extended period of time. Women will go as far as to consider becoming uglier or less attractive as their big solution. I don't think attractive women who make great partners stay o…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/25 02:15 AM
1

Women want men to have higher emotional intelligence. Women are not accepting the way men communicate nor how they express themselves. Women not accepting a man's disinterest in down pillows and similar nonsense. Women not allowing men to look at other women at all. Online or offline.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/25 12:49 AM
1

Having a negative reaction doesn't automatically mean they want to be in a one sided relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/25 12:40 AM

I think most issues would be solved if there was more mutual empathy and mutual understanding. Like yeah it sucks when a guy mistakes a woman being nice as hitting on them. But most of the time being nice looks identical to a woman who is interested. I don't think the empathy you're imposing goes nearly deep enough to form any understanding.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/25 01:15 AM
1

Yeah that's kind of the point. Why does how I feel need to benefit the woman? Unknowingly being undesired vs knowingly is objectively better. Especially when it comes to arbitrary things like height, race, and wealth. And at least I'd be able to cross that bridge if and when I get there.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 06:56 PM

It's more neutral because they could be someone I'd want to date, but I'd never find out. I don't think anyone feels good about hearing exclusionary hard requirements as preferences.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 06:40 PM

Whoa, a damn good question. I had to look up the difference between the two questions because I never needed to make the distinction. Thank you for that. "Are these the same?" expects confirmation of identity. "Are these not different?" expects evidence of any distinguishing features.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 06:27 PM

Is it always to be given a chance? Like I don't like hearing someone's dating preferences that excludes me for arbitrary reasons. Not because I want a chance with them but feeling excluded sucks.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 06:21 PM

Doesn't have to be a projection. The chances of meeting someone while abroad without having to do anything are much higher for women. Living in Miami, when I was on tinder I'd also see a good amount of women on vacation on there.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 06:15 PM

They say that specifically? I could be wrong but I usually just hear "looking for love". Women seem to value attachment much more than men. & I don't think those passport boy marriages are real or have a foundation in reciprocity.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 06:09 PM

I doubt any dude that can get women will be tuning into Fresh & Fit regularly. No that's still too much.. Any dude that loves his mom.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 06:01 PM

Not justifying either side but how's it different from women doing the same thing for different reasons.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 05:56 PM

I think they're angry for that very reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 05:54 PM

Lol "Abracadabra".
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 05:52 PM

High body count is like any other red flag. Doesn't mean anything on its own but can be an indication of a troubled mind. Have to have a certain amount of respect for women or have met a level headed woman with a high body count to see the nuance. & how fucked is it to tell someone they're gonna die alone
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 05:47 PM

They hate them, themselves, and society. Not being able to sleep with someone sucks.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 05:39 PM

Honestly, it’s impossible to say for sure. Women can be pretty good at self-preservation, even if it sometimes makes things more complicated than they need to be. If the idea is to make body count a non-issue, quietly sweeping it under the rug probably isn't doing anyone any favors. But hey, with all the double standards floating around, it’s not like the caution comes from nowhere.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 05:37 PM
4

Just looking like you weigh less pales in comparison to how the weight is distributed most of the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/25 03:57 PM
14

Feels a bit disengenious. Shapewear can make a major difference. & then with everything being high waisted which does well to conceal belly fat.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/25 03:35 PM

I feel like it's because since they get objectified so often, by harping on a dude's muscles, they would be doing the same. That or they met too many muscular assholes and can no longer seperate muscles from jerks. Cuz I notice they start to make it a binary choice between muscles and personality.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/25 01:56 AM

Wtf no, there definitely is a clear path. You learn social skills, useful emotional intelligence like active listening, conflict resolution, and how to communicate and converse, understand how validation works. Then learn the riskier stuff to create sexual tension to ensure you never get friendzoned.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/25 01:52 AM

Men are extremely gay towards one another. When my boy fitted the fuck out, or Xtra caked up, I won't rest until he's made fully aware.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/25 01:44 AM

Who is telling women that—they need to be stopped. Women tend to ignore the reciprocal nature of commitment. Viewing it as something they receive, not that it is something that should be mutually desired. It's delusional when the majority of women prefer to have attachment.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/25 01:40 AM
1

Yeah, I don't understand how they don't see the same as sex. Women will crusify any man that feels entitled to sex but men aren't granted the same respect when it comes to committing.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/25 11:23 PM
0

Is that how most people see 'hypergamy'? I see it failed attempts/settling. The women who improve themselves instead of blaming others are likely happily dating up, making their partner happy in the process. Until women stop feeling entitled to commitment, this will never stop. If a man doesn't commit but in her mind he was supposed to—not because she's fantastic to be with. But because she feels she deserves it, leads to this mindset.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/09/25 11:17 PM
1

It's all usually bad advice. Good advice has to be understood by the other person for it to be useful. I don't think most women understand the male experience, nor men's communication styles enough for this. Also is challenging to explain things that are only known intuitively.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 02:22 PM
7

It's more than just looks because a lot of women fall into the avoidant/non challant trap. If an attractive dude starts acting too anxious or simpy, they'll flip and become the avoidant one.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/25 04:17 PM
1

The opinions of incompetent people are worthless. Of course it came out of nowhere, they were too inept to notice. Denigration might just cause aggression. Deep disappointment on their ineptitude could work even better.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 02:56 AM
1

No I understand what it means. There are many different ways to weaponize incompetence and I was tunnel visioned on "pretending not to know how". It's hard for me to imagine someone being so spineless. Shameless enough to be okay as incompetent, and okay with not contributing when needed. Now that I think of it, I know someone that would do that. But I'd denigrate the fuck out of them, involving everyone he knows. I hate incompetence.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/25 08:46 PM
2

If they knew how to do it, women wouldn't complain about weaponized incompetence. Also why serve even if it's expected? If I don't feel like cooking and my gf expects me to, nobody will eat. We will be fasting.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/25 04:49 PM
6

Yes brilliant. This is what I feel is the case but could not put it in words so eloquently. Extending this logic to prove it further is why a lot of women with only fans have mental break downs. They start feeling good about all the attention, but aren't honest with themselves that it's mostly from being objectified.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/25 01:25 PM
1

Men want that because there is confusion to what women's standards actually are. Even though a lot of women online are disappointed with men.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/25 01:16 PM
1

This is solely men's problem. Humans typically take the path of least resistance. So if she can get everything she wants by just existing, I can't blame her. Women don't really pride themselves on those things.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/25 12:53 PM
17

I'm kind of tired of the most incompetent men being used in these examples. My mom taught me how to eat healthy and make doctor's appointments since before I was 18. In most of my relationships, I did most of the cooking because I have a full kitchen and cooking for one extra person is trivial. Surely there are more men who know how to sustain themselves without a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/25 12:50 PM
1

It can be compared relatively. Most of the time it's non desperate women being compared to very desperate men anyways.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/09/25 07:26 PM

Yes, and of those levels men and women are usually not compared equally.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/25 01:19 PM

I have little doubt there is a male loneliness epidemic. I'm 31 and run my own business from home. If I didn't already have friends I'd be lost. Without classmates or colleagues you have to put in significant effort to find communities where people are open to making friends. The rate at which I lose friends is far greater than gaining friends. Easier to find a gf on hinge than make new male friends. Socializing online and porn cannot and will never suffice for the real thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/25 05:00 AM
1

I don't think women are capable of telling men in a straightforward way what attracts them, especially related to desire. In cases where a guy has a lot of good qualities but doesn't create that romantic pull. Coming off as safe and friendly rather than charged and romantic. Things like being very warm, but not flirty will get a guy friend zoned. Feelings around desire and excitement rarely get intellectualized past "the vibes were right". So I think it's because of women's typical communication…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/25 04:47 AM
1

Wdym look past shape wear. Shape wear can instantly make a woman more attractive. I feel like to make the comparison fair at least compare desperate men with desperate women. There are women who don't like being alone.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 10:09 PM
1

Not at all. No one needs to remind them because it should be a non-negotiable boundary that does not need to be communicated. Just like nobody needs to remind men not to hit women. If you want to you could, but they're likely lacking something crucial to feel comfortable acting that way.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/08/25 03:08 AM
1

Yes that's obvious, but how well should depend on them. That doesn't mean treating them bad was an option. I'd assume you treat her well, beyond the bare minimum every human gets. If there is no reciprocity or appreciation for how you treat her then you're simping.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 05:35 AM
1

It absolutely can be negotiated. Simply wearing poorly fitting clothes can make a man or women look significantly worse. The positive effects are disproportionately execerbated for women with stuff like shape wear and super high waisted pants. Must be reversed for men because a poorly groomed man can have detrimental effects.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 05:22 AM
2

It's highly context dependent. Are you treating her very well simply because she exists. Paying for everything is fine if you're not bankrupting yourself in the process. Texting back immediately 24/7 looks bad. There has to be a period of time during the day where you're not on your phone. Or feel okay not responding because the convo died naturally.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 05:16 AM
1

Weird, perhaps. It'd be accepting and supporting what all kids will come to want. If a girl honestly asks their dad how to get a boy to like her I'd hope that father doesn't dismiss her as she felt comfortable to ask such a question. Anyone with confidence and social competency should also be more attractive to the opposite sex. Things like initiating and escalating interest, or flirting and romantic banter would have to be learned through experience. But general social skills and EQ set the sta…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 05:08 AM
1

Depends what you mean by good. If the good turns into simping where you're overly flexible with things like boundaries. Also guaranteed to happen if you have anxious attachment and she is avoidant.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 04:43 AM
2

What if a guy spent some money to get properly styled and learn how to dress well. & groomed effectively.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 04:34 AM
1

Clearly I was talking about how men are not owed sex even in marriage. Obviously a woman is owed commitment after a man agrees to commit. Why are you doing this? While male sexual entitlement can contribute to a culture that enables or normalizes marital rape, the two should not be conflated because entitlement is an attitude or belief system, whereas marital rape is an actionable violation of a partner’s autonomy and consent.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 04:11 AM
1

I don't know if you're being intellectually dishonest or just misunderstanding the contextual difference.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 03:56 AM
1

I hear what you're saying but there's significant overlap. Many of the most sought-after soft skills in professional settings double as traits that positively influence romantic attraction. Both contexts require the ability to form trust, build strong relationships, contribute positively to a group, and manage conflict or stress gracefully. These are universal traits that foster healthy, mutually beneficial interactions, whether at work or in romantic life. If by trying to avoid their baby boy f…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 03:54 AM
1

What would that change? The phrase already has a valid core meaning: Commitment from a man is not something women are automatically entitled to receive simply because of their actions, involvement, or relationship with him. If you can understand from context they're saying it in bad faith, you should also be able to imagine how it could be used in good faith. The issue is seeing past your bias.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 03:35 AM
2

In my experience most moms are excited to meet their sons girlfriends. Some single moms are jealous of other girls, but that's less common. The issue isn't the age of the advice, which is usually specific to chivalry, but that what women are attracted to hasn't changed all that much. Its practicality & usefulness is also similarly useless to men. Yes specifically on how to be attractive. Any human can indirectly learn to be more attractive by improving confidence, social skills, humor, and most …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/08/25 12:47 AM
4

What in the world? I'd think my mom wants me to be able to get a girlfriend, not to get laid. It's quite easy to seperate romance from physical attraction. And it'd be kinda weird to only consider one without the other. Selfishly framing it as "whether your penis gets action" is invalidating because it dismisses the deeper emotional, psychological, and personal meaning that sex may hold for many people, reducing a potentially intimate, vulnerable experience to a narrow, impersonal physical outco…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 10:12 PM
1

No one needs to remind them lmao. That kind of thinking always comes from a place of pure selfishness, no matter what the situation is. If you can’t communicate what you want while also genuinely respecting the other person’s boundaries and perspective, you’re just being entitled—plain and simple. This is exactly where sayings like “men aren’t owed sex” or “women aren’t owed commitment” come from. At the core, it’s about empathy and respect for each other as individuals. If you can’t see that, y…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 09:15 PM
1

What are you talking about??? It's a valid statement that can be poisoned by someone saying it in bad faith. There's nothing a woman can do that will entitle her commitment. Commitment & sex are based in reciprocity. Even slightly giving off the impression sex is owed, feeling like an obligation is a massive turn off. It's the same for commitment. It's because of cultural norms why women aren't faced with pressure to commit.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 09:01 PM
0

I don't think context matters. If a woman doesn't want to have sex, she doesn't have to. It also applies in marriages. Or a guy who is nice and therefore expects sex, not necessarily becoming unhinged.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 06:27 PM
2

It's not hypocritical because they definitely do deal with more emotionally laborious things. I don't think women liking/needing a lot of emotional support or even validation is comparable to men treating women as their therapist. My issue is women act as if they can't say no and view trauma dumping as a conscious, malicious thing men do. "I'm not your therapist" or "this is too much for me" should suffice.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:58 PM
3

Now you sound just like the women claiming men don't like women for arbitrary reasons. It seems like a lot of women are used to avoidant men who don't share much. I don't think most of them are doing it consciously assuming their needs are met. Either way if you call out a woman for being a poor listener or unempathetic it's an easy fix if they care.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:47 PM
0

They're sort of justified in that because it is harder for women. My friend was telling me how she got openly groped while wearing a bikini at a festival. I've never been groped in my life. It's tough to have mutual empathy after trauma inducing events like that happen. In the same vein I find women who believe they're owed commitment when "Men are not owed sex" vexing. Both are true, and both should be reciprocal. Yet a man who justifiably has doubts is never met with reassurance or understandi…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:38 PM
11

Why is that though? My mommy, being the first woman I interact with in life, should at least be able to give practical advice. In theory, if I take my moms advice in say middle school, and it works out. I'd likely never be swayed by red pill ideology.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:23 PM
11

I think they learn that from women. It's the type of advice my mom would give. And most women tend to be self preserving, leaving out traits they like that could make them look bad. It always ends up sounding like "be nice, be kind, have emotional intelligence". I'd also assume SA plays a role in this as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/08/25 05:02 PM
1

It is annoying how much women can complain about being approached while not making it any easier. It's not men's fault a woman who's interested, and a woman just being nice looks nearly identical. It'll likely be that way for a while as the legitimate danger they face creates an "us vs them" mentality. Mutual empathy is scarce.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/25 09:49 PM
1

I'd argue the women on reddit would skew towards being introverted. There are women that enjoy talking to strangers.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/08/25 04:15 PM
5

I don't think the days of "just be nice" days ever existed. Women have always falsely alluded to being treated nicely as what they want most. And those men are more successful with women likely due to benevolent sexism, not misogyny.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/08/25 03:36 PM
6

This is true but you'd be hard pressed to find women who feel confident enough to portray them as equal publicly. "Yeah he stays at my place and doesn't pay any bills but..."
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 01:54 AM
2

I don't think that will ever happen until we remove the veil of uncertainty.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 01:49 AM
1

Why did that make you defensive and throw insults? People trying to convince themselves of something do exist. & there would be no way to prove you are or aren't one of them through facts. You could say basing an opinion on feelings which is completely valid. Feelings can provide valuable insights. Or basing an opinion on conjecture and cynicism. Saying I feel to me just means, they could be wrong. Especially since if he was right you'd likely never confirm that. Also it's probably really rare t…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 01:39 AM
1

That's some heavy confirmation bias. There are tons of women that end up adopting an "I can fix him" mindset. Or start doing things they probably shouldn't in an attempt to get out the "fuck zone" and gain commitment. The novelty of someone being highly desired doesn't wear off if you're constantly reminded of it every time you both step outside. Most women would not have the ego/self-esteem to just ignore that pressure from other women. There are also dudes, including Chads, that are just drawn…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 01:21 AM
2

As someone who spent a long time cultivating those things, I find the things women ask for get out of control when it's not grounded in reciprocity or empathy. To expect high EQ, good conflict resolution, and superb communication skills. While being a poor communicator yourself. Possibly unwilling to understand a different communication style, or simply struggles to set basic boundaries. Can feel unfair.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/25 01:00 AM
1

You literally can't Uber eats Korean BBQ or a hot pot. The point is to cook the unlimited food. Brother I never go to crowded places. I'll get anxious and can't hear shit when there's too many ppl. All restaurants have slow hours depending on the time and day of the week. I can't even go to sports bars because the myriad of massive TV's everywhere distracting me.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 06:29 PM
1

At all? Not even a hot pot or Korean BBQ spot?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/25 03:01 PM
2

That's a god awful way to go about it. IDK since when people stopped enjoying going out on dates. Like any place with food, liquor, and potentially good conversation should be a good time. Of course they're going to "interview" you, how else do you get to know someone. Perfect opportunity to flex who you are. It should largely be the exact same experience minus her feeling uncomfortable. Also why are you so comfortable inviting strangers into your home?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/25 08:16 PM
1

IDK maybe we could all just mix macho masculinity with vulnerability. I personally dislike seeing myself & other men in a sad pitiful state. So just get angry. "You know what? I'm sick & tired of being single"
/r/MensRights08/08/25 07:58 PM
12

The whole concept of intuition is flawed. Going based on vibes just isn't good enough. It's essentially relying on body language, non verbals, and anything they can't intellectualize and explain. Rare individuals skilled enough can manipulate their body language. Then the worst thing about intuition is people never acknowledge when their intuition was wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/25 07:27 PM
2

Have you tried asking moral or ethical questions? I feel like a good hypethetical can be very informative.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/25 02:43 AM
1

I guess I'm confused now what everyone's perspectives are. I always assumed a "Chad" would exhibit most of the qualities women like. With safety, feeling comfortable, and being valued as prerequisites. Very attractive & desirable men are much less likely to commit to one woman. Different from a "fuckboi". Although simply not committing could get you labeled as a fuckboi anyways. You could hear it from the bitterness of some women when they rant about how a mid ugly guy with a great personality i…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 08:23 PM
1

Completely agree
/r/seduction06/08/25 02:36 AM
1

I don't think any one trait will get you far in life on its own. Replace kind with funny, honest, or loyal. If all you're known for is being kind expecting to get far in life just off that is a wild expectation. Nice > Kind > Compassionate.
/r/seduction05/08/25 05:33 PM
1

Wow I really appreciate you writing that in all caps. Really validated my attempt at shared perspective cuz it's the first time putting that in words. Hmmm maybe instead of coining another ___sexuality we could fully quantify it being a spectrum? Like you're half demi, or a quarter demi. Or would be more accurate to say you're attracted to physical intangibles. Because that makes a lot of sense to me. You can physically see it, but it's representation is what's important. A bit different from tr…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/25 04:06 PM
1

You've told me everything I needed to know. Thank you for your honesty.
/r/seduction05/08/25 03:44 AM
1

Oh I see the confusion. Whether or not it’s verbalized I still disagree. That’s a very juvenile way to handle conflict. Why would that thought come up when the disagreement has nothing to do with sex. And there was no motive for sex at that moment. I don’t think it’s healthy to start taking away things your partner likes as a means of punishment. I could understand if later on, the argument caused some emotional disconnect but to think of that during the argument completely unprompted is vindict…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/25 08:06 PM
1

Okay so I'm understanding you correctly. You're just being disengenious. What makes you think I want to be correct? I get laid because I was able to figure out what actually works. & why would I need to choose one when both can be the outcome. Do you care more about the quality of the advice, or the person giving it?
/r/seduction04/08/25 06:44 PM
2

I think when categorizing it correctly as a form of asexuality really puts the term demisexual into perspective. As a very hetero person I find it easier to understand by negatively framing physical attraction. If you've ever experienced talking to someone with your ideal body type, but their personality was so off putting they stopped being attractive regardless. Then reverse it, and amplify that feeling 100x.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/25 06:31 PM
1

She shouldn't have said that at all. It's an attempt to get their way by removing sex as a bargaining chip. It'll be like if she did something I didn't like, and audaciously to get her to do what I want I say "OK well no more cunnilingus". That is not the same as not being in the mental space to have sex or be intimate. That's a broad assumption because it entirely depends on what is said during the disagreement not the disagreement itself. It doesn't happen as often because women tend not to sa…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/25 06:18 PM
5

Lol "introjecting insecurity" how assumptious. I may have overblown the connotations because: "Literally correcting a genuine female take. Classic redditing." Sounds synonymous to "mansplaining".
/r/seduction02/08/25 06:58 PM
4

That is completely not true or misunderstood. No man with a health amount of self esteem will want to have sex with a woman who is emasculating or blatantly disrespectful. If they do still, likely they lost all respect for her and are hatefucking as a means of domination not pleasure. The threshold for what constitutes as bedroom killing behaviors is just lower for women. Tell a guy his dick is small or compare them unfavorably to other guys and see if he still wants to have sex. Plus men are mo…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/25 06:51 PM
5

Wholeheartedly disagree. If I tell somebody they need to work on their emotional intelligence that’s almost meaningless due to the lack of specificity. “Be a better human being” is even worse because how does someone realistically set out to achieve that. Part of giving good advice is understanding how your target audience will interpret/receive it. Using language they will understand. And ideally, immediately actionable. Therefore I find it audacious for you to blindly imply I’m being sexist or…
/r/seduction02/08/25 05:41 PM
8

For fucks sake I wanted to give my critical opinions without a million disclaimers. Is it not possible that women can explain things, especially things intuitive to them like feelings, in a way men might not understand or be helpful? What she said wasn’t wrong but I feel requires more nuance to be useful for men. Do you disagree with my “corrections”?
/r/seduction02/08/25 05:24 PM
1

They want to but femenism seems to have steered into hatred. Promoting the removal of men rather than reformation. I can kind of relate because as a black person it's mentally challenging to both care for and condemn a group of people with the potential to cause harm or oppression.
/r/MensRights02/08/25 05:22 PM
5

Is too ambiguous. Not all things/hobbies will be considered interesting by women. "Decent human being" accounts for a plethora of characteristics and skills that could be expanded into multiple lists with sublists. Most notably: Self-awareness Self-regulation Empathy Effective communication Empathetic listening Conflict resolution "prove you can stay sober once in a while." Is this an issue for most men?
/r/seduction02/08/25 05:46 AM
2

But why? I feel like that's an extremely harsh pre judgment. Being demisexual is a real thing, the word just gets used incorrectly. I said demisexual specifically because it doesn't make sense why after asking a woman what she's into physically. To completely ignore the question and immediately start listing off intangibles. Or when some women say they like beer bellies. It's why I said some women talk as if they're demisexual, not that they actually are. Being demisexual is akin to being asexua…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/25 02:59 AM
10

To play devil's advocate a lot of women online talk as if they are strictly demisexual.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/25 01:30 AM
1

It's all related. Intimacy is a necessity for a healthy human. The simplest, easiest, and most socially acceptable route for men to get that is from women. Biphobia in women heightens men's aversion to close male friendships.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/25 02:41 PM
1

I can’t even fathom the former being more scary than the latter. I think I’ve finally cracked the code. “Congrats on the glutes”. Might be the way to compliment a woman’s ass sincerely out of appreciation. Haven’t tested it out in the field yet but my homegirls gave it green light.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 02:12 AM
1

That's a good point. I hadn't considered myself special to hear such things. So if I'm now understanding correctly it's not the verbal interaction itself at all. But the very real and potentially unavoidable SA risks? Conceptually I understood this, but empathetizing with the feeling of helplessness, and proximity were the missing puzzle pieces. If it happened to most of your female friends what would make you different. Likewise if 8/10 of my male friends got beat up for no reason, unprovoked, …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/25 05:27 AM
2

Can really just replace badboy with "sexually attracted to". I feel "badboy" is too much of an obfuscation in these examples. Simply acting in ways completely opposite to what lands you in the friend zone is exactly what pushes you into the bad boy zone. Usually the biggest detractor, assuming she doesn't find you completely unattractive, is how much she respects you. badboy cums too fast "my body made him lose control which is kinda hot" I have zero doubt this doesn't happen if her momentum get…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/25 04:07 AM
1

Ever notice how specific some women's preferences are? Like, you'll overhear a group chatting and someone says, “I only like guys with that one exact kind of stubble,” and the next thing you know, the list of turn-offs is a wild grab bag of oddly specific pet peeves—right down to “getting the ick from a grown man drinking through a straw” Let’s play with an example: Imagine we divided all guys into Myers-Briggs personality archetypes (don’t worry, I know no one actually does this for real). To m…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/25 03:42 AM
1

Women usually leave out the important parts that cause them arousal & excitement.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/25 01:50 AM
1

It's all too coincidental my homegirl just tells me about a very recent SA experience while driving for Lyft. I acknowledge that chances of someone pulling their dick out while driving them home. Trying get them inside their place, are exponentially lower for me than are for women. So I see where you're coming from. Luckily nothing happed though I realize even if she pepper sprayed the dude or killed him. That's a fucked up thing to have to through. I didn't gain empathy from experiencing simila…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/25 11:48 PM
2

That makes no sense. You can only waste your own time. An uncertain man guarantees nothing regardless of age. That's your expectation. I also don't know how to feel about relationships having no benefit if there's no attachment/commitment. Personally I find women that think like this the most difficult to commit to. Commitment is not owed to anyone. All expectation & no reassurance committing is the best choice.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/25 02:38 PM
1

Are you 100% sure about that? I only weigh 135lbs and am 5'8". People generally don't get physical when they are clearly in the wrong and there's people around. Might have to rephrase "fuck you" with "you can't talk to me like that" or "that's not appropriate". Fuck you is fighting words and not typically in my vocabulary. Also pepper spray is effective. As are bullets if worst comes to worst. If theoretically all women caried a small firearm and attempted SA lead to they're death or bullet woun…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/25 01:34 AM
1

It's disingenuous to make false equivalencies. You're reframing his specific, event-driven request as a general sign of “insecurity” and lack of trust in her fidelity. Your imposed hypothetical scenario—infidelity without pregnancy—to argue that his trust should be the central issue, regardless of consequences. Infidelity with Pregnancy: This situation introduces a critical variable: a child whose biological parentage is a legitimate and lifelong concern. The man’s request is a direct response t…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/25 01:07 AM
2

It's way more than that. The older you get, the less open minded you become. All I see it doing is amplifying potential issues, leaving less room for error. It could be fine if you both agree on things that could cause dissonance. Or both have exceptional communication skills, good conflict resolution, and willing to compromise. Generational experiences can shape mindsets. It can't be that hard to find a guy that does their four years to gain a bachelors right after high school. Don't most peopl…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/25 12:18 AM
1

Seems more like you're making false analogies to fit your world view. Yes that reads okay to me. I like being complimented on my articulation. And I also like orchestra. If I was asked that IRL I'd give them the benefit of the doubt. Because why would somebody making microaggressions ask a followup like that. It's not odd. I haven't lived the woman experience. But I have lived the male experience and that seems to make me more equipped to deal with stuff like that. I cant control what anyone els…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 10:09 PM
4

That's not the point. I'll spell it out for you. For a woman, there’s a physical, undeniable certainty that the child is hers. She carries the baby, she gives birth. It’s a connection that is proven from the very beginning. For a man, that certainty is based entirely on trust. A paternity test isn’t about checking up on your loyalty. It’s about giving me the same biological peace of mind that you get to have naturally. It quiets a fundamental, biological ‘what if?’ that only a father can feel. W…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 09:24 PM
3

Cheating or cheated? 9 months is a good a mount of time. If I'm looking at this from a secure mindset I'd just feel reassured, happy any and all doubt got cleared up. Then move on. From an insecure mindset, which you're insinuating, the test is less likely to change much. Depending on why they're insecure and how bad the insecurity is. Could still flip it to everyone's benefit if you still love them. Like "OK we can do the test but only if you go to therapy. I've noticed you've been making a lot…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 07:03 PM
4

It's important to differentiate between a man who is inherently insecure and therefore distrustful, and a man who, regardless of his general security, has specific reasons for questioning paternity in a particular situation. What reasons are you willing to accept as legitamate and not "no reason"? Pressure from family members, friends, or hearing about horror stories on social media can prompt a man to consider paternity testing, even if he doesn't have strong personal doubts. You're argument hi…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 06:27 PM
9

That's not a smart way of going about life. Would you have that same mindset when it comes to partners and STDS? Why can't "better safe than sorry" apply here too? What if I’m a terrible judge of character, or she’s just a world-class liar? Plenty of good guys have given the “benefit of the doubt” only to end up funding some other dude’s bloodline. I don't think it's healthy to constantly be looking for signs of the worst scenario. Why would wanting reassurance be met with humiliation if they ha…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 05:54 PM
8

Big bet they'll just respond with invalidation "well you didn't have to carry a child for 9 months".
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 03:29 PM
1

Yes, I'll go through extended periods of not socializing and regress. A lot things involved in socializing are habitual. I always get less funny cuz I'm not actively looking for things to take out of context.
/r/seduction20/07/25 05:37 AM
17

"And wanting a paternity test for no reason also causes drama" God forbid a man wants some reassurance it's actually his child before becoming a complete clown of paternity fraud. How it's not a criminal offense or even just making DNA tests a pre requisite for child support is the real drama.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 05:29 AM
5

You might as well bust out the flow chart. How going half is considered being economical used implies immense bias. Who's using who if we're both broke college students for example. Plus your analysis doesn't include what state your living in, living wage, and average median income. It would be not smart if your goal is min max every relationship based on tangibles. I'm curious the things a 24 year old will have in common with a 32 year old.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 05:04 AM
3

Women have the pussy, they have the power. The opinions of incel men are completely worthless.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 01:53 AM
1

True but there's other ways to achieve that. Would I want others to experience racism as a means to gain empathy? No, I'm not vindictive. I just don't want to experience it. Violence most definitely needs to occur if they thought such disrespect is okay. That's not self control. That's weakness. Lack of self control would be escalating too quickly. Being dehumanized is a form of verbal violence. I'm happy to reciprocate. Yes but the difference is there is no better alternative to express the sam…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/25 07:21 PM
1

We're actually don't agree. We fundamentally disagree on the process. You want men to feel what women felt as a means to achieve equity. It might work for some but I'll get violent well before internalizing disrespect through blatant objectification. "That bitch thought she could dehumanize me". This is already sounding hillarous. Not being able to say "you're so articulate" can't be healed. It's in the connotation. It carries an assumption that being well-spoken is surprising or unusual. There …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/25 05:49 AM

I'd argue men spending that kind of money would pay for prostitutes as an alternative. Not have side chicks.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/25 02:09 AM

Ok first of all taking in opinions from incel men is completely pointless for a topic like this. In my experience with women they do usually want commitment but not for those absolutely ridiculous reasons. Attachment is a huge one. Usually once I start sleeping with a woman, mind you I never lie about my intentions, they start feeling like commitment is owed to them. Time spent starts to lose all it's value/meaning without commitment regardless of the quantity or quality of our dates. I even dat…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/25 02:06 AM
1

I don't think you understood my reply because I mention the difference in power dynamics. That's why I said regardless of intention a man can't compliment a woman's specific body parts. It's already assumed to be out of lust or objectification. Women can literally say "wow your ass is crazy" to each other. Has nothing to do with where the conversation leads because their intentions are pre judged. Give me an example of how I could compliment a woman's ass out of sheer appreciation for the shape.…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/25 08:32 PM
1

Ahh I understand thats part of grand's definition. but with the rise of big bootys I'd just use a different word like magnificent to avoid connoting size. I've really ruminated over this for some time but there are no ways in which a man can show appreciation for a woman's body. Largely in part because women want to look good in ways that are also sexualized. Like say a woman went to the gym to make her butt bigger. In this way strength ≠ sexy the way it does for men. Would women appreciate bein…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/25 05:12 AM
1

My understanding is off the basis that women don't like being objectified. I assume you don't mean sexualized because it would be impossible to stop that. & there's nothing inherently wrong with sexualizing women. Sexual attraction does not have to equal objectification. You can find someone sexually attractive while still respecting their thoughts, feelings, and individuality. Though it feels like sexual attraction, lust, and objectification are demonized proportionally.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 04:35 AM
1

From women in this hypothetical
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 10:03 PM
1

I know, I said that because with consistent sexual interest they'd eventually embrace or get used to it. There won't be guilt and shame after they realize more attention is coming. Neither would there be any reason to be skeptical. They were experiencing cognitive dissonance.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 09:12 PM
3

It won't end well for women. Plus if you think about it it's near impossible to sexualize women in an ego boosting way as a man. Even if you have the best intentions. The vast majority of compliments towards a women's body will not be perceived positively.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 09:05 PM
2

I feel like that part of porn is the most egregiously faked and that fantasy is lost on me.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 08:57 PM
3

The real problem is women mystify tf out of what they actually find attractive. & that sounds like you having an issue adhering to the best out of 10 scale. Could do S tier A tier etc or any other scaling method. You being unable to give your best depiction of an 8/10 man is not the scales fault. It's already a subjective measurement. If 100,000 women say this is what an 8/10 man is, then that's what it is.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 08:50 PM
1

It's hard to compare because of the power differences and/or women are more agreeable. It's far more likely men would just get aggressive if they're not being taken seriously seeing it as disrespect. I personally wouldn't mind being objectified because it changes nothing. It'll fit right in with the other prejudicial experiences I've had. I'm not on a mission to have personal relationships with everyone. Thus most encounters are already superficial by nature, being objectified would just add "sp…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 08:37 PM
1

Anybody would be skeptical if they randomly started receiving sexual attention for the first time. Seduction is a fantastic tool to manipulate men. Eventually the shock will subside and their ego boosted.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 08:11 PM
3

That's just false. Culture plays a major role in shaping what women find attractive, especially regarding body type, specific facial features, and valued personality traits. While some preferences may have a biological or evolutionary basis, most standards of attractiveness are heavily influenced by cultural norms, media, and social values, and can vary dramatically between societies.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 08:06 PM
3

I think it does. The way so many women completely avoid answering a question on what type of men they find physically attractive is suspicious. "lean & athletic or more built?" "The type with emotional intelligence" 😤 This common reaction leads me to believe women don't want to appear as hypocrits and potentially objectify men like how men objectify women.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 07:50 PM
3

Being attractive and having the confidence to tell interested women to fuck off automatically puts you leagues ahead of a lot of men.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/25 03:10 AM
1

How can you assume the women are not picking the same men just because there are more options. Especially when the most attractive men get the most matches on tinder.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/25 03:07 AM

The 6ft thing when the average man is well under that height is pretty discouraging. But I think a good personality is extremely difficult to achieve without putting in massive effort.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/25 02:32 AM
2

That sounds like black culture lol. My successful homegirl would get called "big money" and insecure dudes would feel a type of way when less successful.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/25 02:24 AM
1

I think it's a mixture of women being self preserving, not understanding the male experience, and thinking intuitively. It's very similar to why most women fail boys as single mothers when it comes to courting. I think women are completely capable but unwilling. Anytime there's a tiktok with uncommon advice about women it's met with "stop giving all the secrets".
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/25 02:16 AM
1

I think what you mention is the norm. It sounds reasonable. I'm speculating, but it might be this isn't the case when a guy gets a date through shameful means.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/25 02:04 AM
1

I think this is because women are not oppertunistic, at all. The common sentiment is "because he wants to sleep with me, he should also want to date me". I think it's completely possible to attract with sex then because your personality is so fantastic they'll be compelled to make it exclusive.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/25 01:53 AM
1

It can feel deeply unsatisfying—and even hurtful—to realize someone is interested in you primarily because of what you have achieved or what you can provide, rather than for who you are at your core. This distinction between being valued for outcomes (like your job, money, or status) versus your actual personality traits (like kindness, humor, or integrity) is significant in relationships. I don't think is anyone wants for women to give guys they're not attracted to a chance. It would more ideal…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/25 01:43 AM
2

As my experience has been the same as yours, I thought so too. However, a woman I'm friends with told me about a guy she dated whom she hoped to grow sexually attracted to. As this guy had his shit together. I was outraged. The biggest problem was how she saw absolutely nothing wrong with this. I asked her how he would feel if he knew this? Or how would she feel if a guy she dated didn't find her attractive? No empathy just more justification. I don't think this is unique to her.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 03:29 AM
2

Yes but there is a ton of overlap. And when I said find attractive, I don't just mean willing to sleep with. Happy to sleep with is more accurate. The problem I have is there is no way to talk about a woman's dateability. I think most men want both but it's possible her personality turns them off to the idea. It's always assumed the woman is aleeady relationship material and guys just only see her for her body. This assumption is also based on their own opinion of themself. That could be the cas…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 02:59 AM
2

Unless you're fortunate enough to have someone giving you actually good dating advice. Societal standards are all you have. Who wouldn't want to be more fuckable/dateable.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 02:36 AM
2

The comment got deleted but that's what it sounded like they were describing.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 02:33 AM
2

The main difference is men find a large portion of women attractive. I'd also argue one's attractiveness is easier to change than how much they make.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 02:31 AM
1

The male equivalents to women's standards would be insane.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 02:13 AM
2

You can't talk about most divisive topics in public comfortably. Has more to do with societal norms than the topic itself.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 02:07 AM
1

I strongly believe women don't want to engage in anything remotely similar to the "male gaze" or objectification. The way women will completely avoid the question of "what type of men they find most physically attractive?". To immediately start talking about intangibles is suspect.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 01:59 AM
3

Madonna–whore complex When someone sees women as either saintly and pure or as only sexual, never both.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 01:45 AM
2

If women paid for the dates, I think they'd be less upset.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 01:10 AM
1

Within the first three dates assuming she's also sexually attracted.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 01:07 AM
1

I'd argue it's not even about control. Pride and the understanding of women will take you further.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 12:58 AM
2

I have two main concerns with this topic. First, being labeled as a "good" or "nice" guy isn’t a compliment—it feels more like a backhanded insult. If the most notable thing about someone is that they’re nice, it suggests there’s not much else to their personality. There’s a big difference between being nice and being kind; kindness comes from genuine empathy, while “nice” often just means agreeable or bland. You’d never call a truly funny guy “nice” before you’d call him hilarious. So, when a w…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/25 11:33 AM
1

Maybe micro degree. I've had one dermatologist, and like three doctors. They solve different issues and I don't need to connect with them on a personal level. Mechanic? Either they can do the job or not. The way I hear how my friends have to shop around for therapists is no wear near comparable. And my insurance does not even let you pick. They randomly select someone for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/25 07:30 AM
1

It's really just the nature of texting and social media. It fosters negativite emotions because of how fast and available it makes you. Things can easily get misinterpreted and nobody is going to text well formed sentences enough to minimize that. The best is having a girl that constantly hits you with "!!! I'm gonna call you" after saying something mildly interesting. Also don't follow a girl you're dating on social media. Life's wayyyyyy less stressful.
/r/seduction01/07/25 07:21 AM
2

IDEALLY the stay at home wife uses her free time to start a home business. A self taught & ambitious woman can do damn near anything with enough time and energy.
/r/MensRights29/06/25 10:22 PM
1

Yes, as social norms are collective, not just personal. I have second and third hand experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/25 08:10 AM
1

I believe you in saying that it happens. Hasn't been my experience. Of the shy & awkward girls I've dated I've haven't seen anyone react to them so negatively. Neither my sister. Except maybe niche scenarios like skipping someone in line by accident.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/25 12:46 AM
2

They become so absorbed in how it's mostly men committing all the sexually violent crimes. Start to believe all of the overgeneralizations as truth. Reduced to repeating the same ineffective message or pure misinformation. All empathy becomes lost since men are the direct cause. Any opinions that disagree is just more oppression and upholding the patriarchy. I feel like when it comes to crimes unrelated to women & SA. There's a much clearer distinction between men and criminals. For now while "a…
/r/MensRights27/06/25 09:50 PM
1

Quirky is way too nice of a word to be part of that lineup. "My wife can be such a bitch sometimes" "My wife can be so quirky sometimes" I'ma always think this what they mean. <image>
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 06:47 PM
2

Quirky would be used to describe a socially awkward or aloof woman. Socially awkward Men don't get this courtesy unless they're really attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 03:04 AM
1

I'd argue women are hornier than men. There are just a lot more pre-qualifications and stigmas to get through. Since women can easily get taken advantage of, get pregnant, or die. It is nearly impossible to be aroused whilst also feeling unformfortable. A woman would have to pull a nuke out her purse for a man to reconsider. Then social stigmas & pride. Once you get past all that they're no different from men.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 02:12 AM
4

Most likely involved some combination of these: Angling, Rocking, Shallowing and Pairing. I've been studying why women are so gravely under pleasured by men. The lack of vocabulary was something I never considered. "Inaccessible vocabulary can present substantial barriers to a woman’s ability to accurately describe to a partner what techniques she would like to use, and how she would like them performed [50]. This ambiguity could likewise impede a woman’s individual learning of how to amend exis…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/25 11:30 PM
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