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Professional-Ad-457 Archive

View 3 posts and 590 comments by Professional-Ad-457 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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46

Hesitates to commit to moving in or marriage because how can he hide it when he’s living with you?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/22 11:35 PM
197

Yeah - it takes them ages to come and they talk about worrying they may have ED. Or they talk about abstaining from masturbation to prevent ED.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/22 11:13 PM
219

Yes this - they snigger and everything is a double entendre. They also have wandering eyes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/22 08:16 PM
555

For ‘crazy’ read ‘drunk’. For ‘boring’ read ‘not an alcoholic’. These guys’ first love is their addictions. When they meet a woman who is also an alcoholic they’ll be telling reddit: ‘She always takes it too far and embarrasses me’ or some other problem that comes with drinking. Alcohol is his only love. They are so down the rabbit hole of self-delusion they have to dress alcoholism up as ‘man goes to the bar’ = crazy & exciting life of non-stop glamour!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/04/22 09:55 PM
121

I was surrounded by family today but felt very lonely because since my divorce my sister and husband never invite me anywhere outside of ‘family’ parties nor do they come to anything I invite them to. E.g. Things I’m invited to: my dad’s bday, xmas, easter day. Things I’m not invited to: friends barbq, new years eve, dinner parties, pub. I suggested an activity for us to do and immediately she’s like ‘we can invite dad too’ because I am no longer a ‘friend’ I am in a ‘family’ box to her. When I …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/04/22 10:35 PM
171

With successful old guys, they get 90% of their self worth from their business acumen. They lead with that when chatting up younger women and think its enough for women to overlook their saggy ass. They want women to judge them for what’s in their wallet because they believe it makes them special. So why wouldn’t these young girls like him…its the opposite of the 50/50 watch out for gold diggas type who have nothing in their wallet and don’t want to be judged for that. They want to be wanted bec…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/04/22 12:28 AM
28

Yes! This has happened a couple of times to me recently. Thanks to FDS I just blocked them. My new rule is that if he starts hot and then after a few dates blows cold, I block. I think often these hot & cold guys have situationships already going on which makes them strapped for time after the initial love-bombing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/22 08:43 PM
40

👍💀⭐️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/04/22 10:32 PM
81

Avoidant attachment style
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/04/22 09:53 AM
13

Plus we can’t make things happen with a man we need to wait for them to ask us - they are turned off if we make the moves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/04/22 11:05 PM
65

They say “If you hadn’t made me so angry I would never have ….”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/04/22 09:45 PM
150

YES! For the love of god lurkers - organise your own dates don’t expect the woman to do it for you
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/04/22 02:56 PM
48

I don’t know how old your son is, but I give mine a budget and my amazon account and let him go wild! I remind my ex to do the same so I’m not involved with buying that loser a present.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/04/22 02:50 PM
118

I make out I think they want to call me via whatsapp so I say something like ‘sure I’d like to speak to you on the phone but instead of whatsapp can you call me through this app? When were you thinking?’ This filters out the ones just there to chat and sends the other 50% into a blind panic as they will have to man up and TALK to a woman! The excuses are tragic
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/04/22 02:46 PM
30

And manipulate. Men really get off on manipulating women and now I can’t unsee that in their interactions with me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/03/22 10:38 PM
115

And she’s cheap sex because she’s happy to stay in and cook for him!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/03/22 10:30 PM
4

💛💛💛💛💛
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/22 05:13 AM
41

I agree with this OP -also don’t give up the hobby! Now he can’t have you he’ll want you all the more so he’ll be pining for you. Great for your ego to constantly bump into a man pining after you😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/22 05:04 AM
91

Yay! FDS cured me too from the ole’ benefit of the doubt. Zero doubts just BLOCK now 💅
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/22 04:50 AM
171

Ugh the male ‘hero’ in Bridgerton 2 is so LV. When they showed the montage of him taking out ladies during the day then angrily using lots of different prostitutes during the night it was a total turn off for me. I’m hate watching the rest of it now. I haven’t read the books (written by a woman) but the screenplay writer, producer & director are all men. Wish only women created entertainment for women. He’s got no redeeming features and the sexy ‘moments’ he has with Kate don’t work because…chea…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/22 04:34 AM
56

Yeah it’s all fun and games until you factor in having kids with them. In my experience even guys who just do weed prioritise it over the relationship. You and your (future) kids will always come second. Same with big drinkers. Also there is often emotional arrested development if they’ve not learnt how to entertain themselves/socialise/relax without their drug of choice. The brain has rewired itself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/22 11:28 AM
46

Can you imagine the mantrums before their bodies adjust to the new hormones 🤦🏼‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/22 09:46 PM
25

Yes me too
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/22 08:04 PM
80

Yes this catches the self-proclaimed ’good guys’ who are only dishonest when they’re ‘forced to be’ - so lame 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/22 08:03 PM
31

‘You’ll never find someone as good as me’ projection.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/22 08:00 PM
62

Another takeaway for me is he finds her on OLD ‘get on the dating apps and not be happy with the results’ i.e. you’re the only one that’s matched with him for a month. He gives you a shot even though you’re not his type. He hasn’t chosen you because he swiped on and messaged everyone and so you appearing in his inbox makes him think you chose him. This is why these guys don’t respect women on there. By matching with him his ego sees it as you chasing him (they forget how many matches we get) and…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/22 07:55 PM
78

This is gold! Integrity is everything in a man and the main thing missing in my exes. What other practical tests of integrity can we think of?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/22 09:52 AM
25

Women are just collateral damage in the service of their dicks
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/03/22 01:12 AM
239

If she dumps him he’d grow a pair and suddenly think marriage is a great idea.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/22 07:48 AM
3

Watched a documentary about Hitler’s sex life (!) on prime and he was well into porn - he had a member of staff who’s job was to get freaking porn reels for him to watch before porn was even a thing! He couldn’t get it up just asked his girlfriends (all in their teens when he met them) to do gross stuff like pee on him or kick him. He was a sado-masochist who killed all his exes (he staged them as suicides).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/22 11:32 PM
26

Oh god the mansplaining monologues about their jobs when they’re trying to chat you up
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/22 10:12 PM
25

Then when chatting up strangers in public doesn’t work they go on online dating and LIE in their biogs about an active social life full of sport and hobbies (and being married)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/22 10:09 PM
10

I agree - I had this glorious sensation of ‘falling’ in love as soon as they put my baby in my arms. Greatest love of my life and 100% unconditional both ways.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/22 09:23 AM
17

Yeah having a child doesn’t put men off!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/22 09:18 AM
14

Pre FDS, I once copy and pasted this lols paragraph to about 50 new guys on bumble which was SUCH an obvious line. It was an involved story about being stopped by a policewoman, because I was driving at the same time as texting a first message to him, and she let me off because his photo was so hot 💀It was basically a joke pick up line. I had pretty much a 100% response rate because the majority thought it was real 🤡There were a couple of butt hurt scrotes who hurled insults at me for ‘lying’. I…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/03/22 08:54 PM
53

Yes! He knew I was about to walk away because he hadn’t asked me to marry him. This way he hoped I’d be a forever girlfriend for another year. I could have opened up a jewellers with the number of engagement rings I’ve been offered AFTER I’ve dumped them. Was devastated at the time but it makes me giggle now..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/22 09:02 PM
184

He got down on bended knee, gave me some roses, whipped out a whopping big diamond ring, and asks me ‘will you get engaged to me IN A YEAR’S TIME?’ Lmao Nope
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/22 02:57 PM
20

Yeah that’s another reason they won’t stop doing it when you ask them - their whole reward system is about receiving looks for the dopamine hit. That’s why they attack you (INSECURE!) when you complain about it to protect their dopamine supply
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/03/22 11:10 PM
70

Video games, weed, nicotine, alcohol.. all addictive. He has no room left in his brain for you. These are all his love affairs and all will come before you because he has rewired his brain. His brain is constantly prompting him to do at least one of these four things and to reject anything (you) that prevents him from doing it. Yes he could reverse the damage but he has to do this for him not you because if its for you his brain will deep down HATE you for it. Ask me how I know.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/22 03:11 PM
30

This couple should not procreate
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/22 09:14 AM
10

The myth told to women was that men had such a hard time at work they needed to be coddled when they arrived home. Now we’ve all got jobs we know first hand how ‘hard’ it is to do your job i.e. not at all unless he’s incompetent. So many lies told to women and even hvm must have colluded with the lies wtf.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/22 09:08 AM
45

You dropped so many hints that you weren’t going to sleep with him and were uncomfortable, that he is either dumb or a rapist. I really hate that ugly pissed look on their face they get when they realise we’re not going to have sex after knowing them the length of a 3 hour dinner. It makes them look evil.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/22 08:53 AM
75

I think the height and d*ck standard triggered them otherwise they wouldn’t have an opinion. The rest of her needs are ‘has a job’ so hardly a unicorn
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/22 08:51 PM
5

At least he fries it - my ex eats frozen chips straight from the freezer
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/22 12:02 AM
8

Geriatric priest with chapped lips lolol💀
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/22 11:55 PM
2

I see you dated my ex!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/22 11:42 PM
49

They used to find a flash of ankle a shocking turn on when it was forbidden for them to see it. Maybe if we all walked around in the summer bare breasted like they do they’d stop finding it sexy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/22 11:16 PM
35

💯% this. They admire themselves for how charming they are (cheaters) how adventurous and cool they are (drugs) what a high libido and how manly they are (porn) how in control they are in relationships (emotional abuse) how suave and james bondy they are (lying and manipulation to get women into bed)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/22 02:17 PM
77

Can we send Putin there too with him? They can boss each other around
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/22 10:10 PM
18

A neighbour kept putting notes on my ex’s car when he legally parked on the road by their house (nowhere else to park - everyone did it - the dude just wrote notes to everyone) and it stressed out my boyf who whined about it every time. One day we saw the neighbour (a stranger but it was a nice civilised neighbourhood and he looked like a nice chap with a cute family!) and I said let’s go and have a chat. My ex went bright white, started stuttering and tried to run away. Then I said I don’t mind…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/22 03:50 PM
68

My theory is it’s the only photo of themselves they have that someone else has taken!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/22 10:50 PM
55

Omg yes OP! If I could hop in a time machine and go back to my younger self - or even me just 2 years ago - this advice would have solved EVERYTHING for me! It’s like I know when I’m disrespected, dump them, tick, tick, but the mistake I used to make is taking them back when they beg & promise to change. Spoiler alert the change is never long term! Never again. Since FDS I have been 1 strike and out with guys.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/22 01:54 PM
59

The men on these apps want to be chased! And my pickmeisha friends do chase them so I can see how they’ve come to expect it. Even when I met guys who pretended to put in some initial effort, after a few dates they’d revert back to expecting me to lead so it would fizzle out on my end. Odd when you consider the stats and how few women they match with. Ultimately I realised that even the ‘nice guys’ are using the apps for hookup sex and their filter is to put in low effort to filter out women with…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/22 10:32 AM
49

My LVX used to rage at me about odd things and it was only with time and no contact that I properly realised I’d been in an abusive relationship. Good you’ve seen it now and decided to leave - you won’t regret it and you won’t tolerate another abuser in the future either.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/22 06:50 PM
73

Also… where’s the loyalty? Tiktok videos slagging off your husband? Fine if he’s an ex but to post this and expect a healthy outcome?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/22 10:37 AM
70

Don’t get what the big deal is about putting away or folding that goes on in laundry. Why did she agree to this non task instead of insisting he is responsible for actual ‘doing the laundry’? ‘Putting away’ takes a couple of secs surely unless I’m doing it wrong. I don’t think this exists as a task in the UK - UK ladies?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/22 10:33 AM
29

My ex doesn’t set foot in my home - I’ve explained boundaries to my son and he accepts it. This is so good for both of us to have this hard rule. If your ex can’t come into your home then neither can his girlfriend. Also try to have boundaries at Christmas- the kids will not have their xmas ruined if you don’t open their stockings as a ‘family’ or whatever. That is just us as parents projecting onto them our own fears. Make new xmas traditions with hard boundaries that never involve him. He must…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/22 05:09 PM
36

This! His wife was listening to the phone call so he ranted to make it believable
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/22 06:53 AM
23

Is he still living in the place you shared together? And you have keys? If so visit when he’s out and look through everything with a fine tooth comb. I found receipts in the bin that tipped me off about his secret bank account. He’ll store all his yearly statements somewhere. Take photos or if he has a scanner use that. Good luck 🤞
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/22 11:53 AM
39

I’ve been wondering…why don’t guys want to find true love & all that good stuff? Is it because they weren’t disneyfied like women are? Because they don’t respect women? Because they don’t want women to discover their bad habits when we get intimate with them? Love hormones are awesome. Sex is more awesome when you’re in love. Why just flit around hoping for (and rarely getting) meaningless sex when they could have decent sex in a relationship?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/22 07:49 PM
196

Yeah it’s fake - ‘Hennessy’ 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/22 09:52 AM
79

By the end I was thinking ‘aw cute they’re both teens it’s first love’, then I checked at the top - he’s 30! Sounds like he’s 14
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/22 07:33 AM
103

I googled “the rules dating book group” because my pickme friends loathe that I strictly use the rules on my dates (even tho my scrotes spoil me & ‘act’ loved up as a result vs their scrotes who just treat them like hookups?!) and I wanted to read other women’s experiences with doing it. This sub popped up in my search & I felt so validated by you-all. I have been radicalised 😂and take zero sh*te from men now because…THEY KNOW 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/02/22 09:05 AM
114

😂made me cackle!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/02/22 08:40 AM
66

You can phone and video call through all the apps here. I used to give out my whatsapp when they asked but got sick of the ‘good morning’ texts, so when they asked me for my whatsapp I instead pretended I thought they meant to call me and said ‘sure would love a phone chat - can you call me or video me on this app?’. They would agree but get all shifty and be busy and book a time in the future then fail to call or be shit shows in other ways. Always thought it odd that they didn’t want to video …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/22 09:52 PM
59

Yeah it’s when they bring them up all the time in casual conversation. HVM would be sensitive and avoid mentioning her. He could also be triangulating you with her to make you jealous but either way it’s a red card.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/22 09:19 PM
36

I worry for them. He’s an unhinged, abusive sociopath and they’ve all exposed him. The threat of going to jail hasn’t stopped him from committing crimes. He knows where they live.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/22 06:45 PM
30

I see you’ve met my brother-in-law
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/22 06:35 AM
55

This does not get offered as a date in the UK…yet. Is it a visit to a charity shop? Because even the pickmeist of pickmes would laugh at a scrote offering this. We do have auction houses - perhaps this is what they mean by thrifting? That also would never be suggested as a date by UK lads but would be less of an offensive offer😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/02/22 06:15 AM
13

Oof that is super creepy wtf
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/02/22 08:38 AM
167

This happened to a pickme friend of mine in the UK a few months ago. She said it was a ‘scam ring’ and the police were involved. She met him on tinder and he was a British CEO of an oil company who travelled all the time, often to be on the rigs with bad phone reception. His socials and work profile checked out. He did all the red flaggy stuff - love bombing, constant texting to create false intimacy, reveals appalling sob backstory on first date to create a bond, first date was COFFEE DATE but …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/22 01:11 AM
35

Yes hard agree with all of this -and also in it’s mildest form, the constant withdrawing when they get too close is emotionally abusive af in and of itself, hurts and rips apart the woman’s self esteem.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/22 07:00 PM
34

They look like brother & sister to me. They’ve got the same face 😯
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/22 06:42 PM
55

Why are LVM so hung up about the phrase ‘positive intent’. They fling it around in every situation as if it miraculously absolves them of all wrongdoing. It’s a red flag for me now when I hear a guy say it. It’s an admission of guilt - he’s got nothing else to defend himself with because he’s guilty.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/22 06:00 PM
54

Prefer a man who’s head wasn’t shaped like humpty dumpty 💀
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/22 02:19 AM
64

Thank you. I felt sick when I read this a few days ago. I had to go back and reread to make sure I’d read it correctly. So embarrassed for the human race at this point.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/22 05:55 AM
4

You could mastermind vigalante stings with earring trackers like on Night Hunter. Swerve jail just chop off their balls! Watched it last week on netflix for a Henry Cavill fix.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/22 11:36 AM
38

💀💛
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/22 11:26 AM
38

Great post. Brought back a ton of memories. I found the best way to deal with this was to sigh heavily, agree with him nicely and suggest we break up. Surprised pikachu face every time. If someone tried this again I hope I would just block them at the first sign of manipulation. No spaghetti sticking here I’m low carb 😎
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/22 11:16 AM
8

Sounds right. He wasn’t the sharpest tool in the box. Asked me to come off the apps on date #1. Asked me to be his girlfriend on date #2. Ever considered working for the FBI as a profiler?😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/22 10:59 AM
35

I dated a navy medic who constantly updated me about his day: Bad night sleep but heading into work lol Busy morning so far lol Popping out for a sandwich lol Taking coffee break lol Just seen my last patient lol 2 hours of PT I’m knackered lol Popping out to supermarket lol On the motorway lol It was exhausting and nothing was ‘lol’ about anything he wrote. He would berate me on the phone about never texting him back. And call me a few times a day to ‘check in’. And non stop texted me while he …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/22 06:37 PM
7

Omg I love this idea 💛
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/22 11:56 AM
8

Happy scrote free birthday babe! You 100% did the right thing! Have a great day 🎂🥳🎉
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/22 11:44 AM
25

An ex sent me a mix he had ‘dJ mixed’ for me on a CD and said ‘that’s the sort of boyfriend I am you can expect more surprises in the post from me’. Never received another postal gift again 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/22 11:35 AM
32

I’m taking comfort in butterflieshurricane’s comment. We can’t verify the source of the post. 99% sure it’s a man larping
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/22 10:44 AM
346

Unbeknownst to me he had stolen my spare key at some point before we broke up. After I dumped him he would come in and take personal items when I was at work until I clocked what was happening and changed the locks 😱. We lived in different parts of a major city but even a year later I would look around nervously because he’d sometimes be standing near my road just to freak me out😱. Came back at 2am one night and I saw this fist smash through the air vent of my window 😱. Called the police, they d…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/22 07:53 AM
136

And he stays up late every night drinking. Lovely.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/22 05:01 PM
25

Yes the exception being guys who have been drinking - then they’re not too cowardly to approach. Seems like the only alternative to OLD is to hang out in bars and hope to attract an alcoholic 😕
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/22 03:47 PM
4

The British media has portrayed Harry as a bungling idiot ‘boy’ all his life. The media has portrayed Meghan as a narc. The media is where the Brits get their opinions from because there is nowhere else they can get an opinion from. That’s why the Brits think she’s a narc and narcs have victims i.e. bungling Harry - so she gets blamed. But the couple don’t do themselves any favours either. For example they’re currently suing the British government because we won’t give them police protection any…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/22 03:59 AM
13

This episode was so funny - thx for the laughs ladies
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/01/22 02:11 PM
25

Neck tattoos and piercings esp. earrings. My cousin had one of those earrings where it was designed to make a gaping hole in his ear lobe over time. I dunno, earrings become their whole personality: ‘look at me I’m so different’.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 10:52 PM
21

Or playing his comfort music incessantly on a top of the range DJ set up - dreams of being a DJ superstar with zero gigs ever got and on the wrong side of forty.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 10:44 PM
11

I second this!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 10:38 PM
11

Or having to watch a load of cricket test matches that go on for days on the TV. It’s just an excuse to abuse alcohol for 48 hours and eat junk food. Has to be watched live.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 10:37 PM
98

So rude too! They go to the bar to get the drinks and spend 20 mins laughing uproariously with the stranger next to them or the barman/woman leaving you sat alone waiting by yourself. If you hear what he laughs about NONE of it is funny, it’s all for show ‘look how loved I am’, even if there is no one else to witness it. Especially irritating when the stranger behind the bar is a woman. ‘I’m just a friendly guy’…gah
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 10:30 PM
133

Most of my long term boyfriends proposed to me when I left them (because they “weren’t sure if they were ready to commit”) but by the time I’d dumped them I was hopping mad and turned them all down 😂My poor dad kept being asked for ‘my hand in marriage’ by men he thought I’d dumped and got very confused! My lvx took the biscuit tho because I’d expressed my boundary multiple times that I wouldn’t move in with a man unless I was engaged. He said the whole ‘not sure I’m ready/confused/what’s the ru…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/22 04:02 PM
24

And you may go to the clinic together but you talk to the doctor separately in private
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/22 07:43 PM
77

For once a reddit post that made me smile☺️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/22 11:26 AM
18

A scrote said his scrotey friend deleted all the apps when he totted up how much he was spending on dates. He started going to a prostitute instead 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/22 02:45 PM
31

Yes and since FDS when they go cold I ignore them, don’t reach out at all, but just know they will send me a sly text in a month, recent examples include: “hope you found what you’re looking for” or “just reaching out if you fancy a chat sometime” or “been thinking of you how is…” I get immense pleasure from these texts because I just ignore/ghost them right back and imagine their surprised pikachu faces when they get a dose of their own medicine lmao. Clowns think they’re so machiavellian and c…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/22 10:56 AM
107

Became moody and angry (continuously at the world rather than aimed at me), stopped listening to me or having friendly conversations, watched disgusting porn daily on his phone conmuting home on the train from work, wanted to watch sport on tv all the time, no sex drive (I didn’t put on much weight just had a baby bump and he suddenly stopped even before I was showing), stopped suggesting fun things to do together, ate/drank so badly he gave himself diabetes. A few years later I found out about …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/22 06:54 PM
172

My ex husband was fantastic on holidays, great to live with, but the moment I was pregnant his mask slipped. I was astonished. Terrifying to think this was deliberate because he thought I was trapped. So sociopathic and apparently so common.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/22 06:01 PM
4

😯… nooooo wtf!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/22 01:23 PM
3

That’s a good come back. I was always stunned that someone could use this line of argument and the debate would be derailed into why good intentions wasn’t an excuse, thus the spotlight was away from his behaviour I was initially upset about. I think he’d use this to gain a few minutes respite from having to own his bad behaviour. If a man says these words again I’ll laugh in his face and immediate block. No more debating or ‘teaching’ a scrote how to be a decent human. They know. Gah😤
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/22 01:10 PM
46

“I had good intentions. I’d planned not to do it..” Apply this to taking drugs, getting fall over drunk, losing his temper at me, coming on to other women, inviting women over to his house, lying, drunk driving, ignoring me when we’re out together, porn, eating a load of junk food (when he was trying to lose weight)..if at some point in the day he’d decided not to do said thing (but oops slipped up in the evening) the fact that he’d had that good thought was meant to absolve him of the need for …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/22 09:48 PM
20

Yes! The family should make an exception for the OP especially if he’s the father figure. Awful family. Bad boyfriend. The OP’s forever girlfriend needs to run 🏃‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/22 02:26 PM
43

I believe that if they have had years of practice at acting sincere with women, (starting with their mother) then there’s no clear signs. That’s why we have to snoop. How they act or write or connect with people when they don’t think we’re looking is the only way to find out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/22 02:04 PM
161

And for lies by omission, the champion clown cup goes to the scrotes who say defensively, ‘I didn’t tell you because I knew you would react like this!’ 🤡🏆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/22 11:30 PM
2

Another belly 💀
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/22 12:23 PM
3

‘They think they’re toying with you like a cat does a mouse’ in terms of dating men on OLD - THIS! The whole hot/cold-negging-trying for instant sex-what are you looking for-omnishambles that is OLD
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/22 12:20 PM
12

It was hot but Carrie watching ruined it! Anyway Carrie would have shouted louder for help instead of watching them do it and peeing in a bottle. The writing sucks. It’s Carrie’s fault that she ended up with pee all over the bed. A bff would have no problem stopping and coming to help.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/21 11:28 AM
28

Gah! To stop him from exploding with rage I learnt to smile sweetly and say ‘it’s not a big deal…but..’ before any criticism. He would visibly relax then I could say what was on my mind. Thus I undermined myself because it was always a big deal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/12/21 06:10 PM
16

Saying something difficult or odd to start a fight at a time when it would make sense for you to be closer e.g. on your birthday or some other celebration or on a romantic weekend away. Or if you’ve been having a lovey dovey few days together. One way to do this is to triangulate you with other women. Anything to squash any ‘closeness’. Always saying ‘what are your plans this weekend’ even though you’re an established couple. There’s no ‘what are our plans this weekend’. Look at what their defau…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/12/21 05:51 PM
578

Breaking news: you can connect with women via social media. Up next: man invents wheel.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/12/21 09:30 AM
52

Dumped him when he confessed to me that he cheated. I was devastated because I loved him so much. He blamed the cocktail of drugs he’d taken 🤡and tried everything to get me back. He is the only guy that cheated on me and was honest enough to volunteer the information and admit it. I told myself that counted for something 🤡. I took him back but my eyes were opened and I saw his flirty ways with other women as less innocent. It gave me PTSD and I was constantly on edge. A year later when he was ve…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/21 10:45 AM
86

We’ve all been there babe 😘
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/21 03:00 PM
135

When a guy writes ‘full disclosure’ he knows he’s being shady
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/21 04:42 PM
78

Hard agree but also it may not be that he doesn’t like YOU, it can also be the case that he is so self-centred he is unable to form a healthy relationship with ANYONE because he is broken. So many screwed up scrotes around. They mess with our self-esteem but we should try not to let them get us down because the truth is no woman will ever make them act right. It’s not personal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/21 01:45 PM
169

He likes camping but has no friends. Wish LVM would ask each other out at this point and leave us alone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/21 02:23 PM
10

I’ve wrapped and put an Alexa voice controlled coffee machine under the tree for me. I’m going to keep it on my bedside table and before I open my eyes in the morning I’ll be able to say ‘Alexa make me a coffee’. No scrotes needed now for that task!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/21 03:04 AM
55

It is tricky. Before covid a few years ago, I went out a lot more socially and met single guys, they knew I was single, but not many asked me out until I put my profile on Match and all the same single guys I knew asked me out online. At the time I thought prob. because they feared rejection in person but could cope through an app?? I had a busy dating life again this summer until I saw the light and gave up OLD. Now guys I meet IRL aren’t asking me out. I agree with everything you’ve written OP…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/12/21 11:32 PM
76

I 💛that you wrote this - mirrors my experience last year to a T of giving my LVX a short-lived second chance. Merry scrote-free Christmas🎄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/12/21 01:00 PM
3

Yes she could have easily called an abulance while keeping meaningful eye contact with Big and held him crying while waiting for it 😂the writers screwed up BIG time as this has caused so much consternation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/12/21 12:53 PM
9

The original series was written by men - I expect this one is too
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/12/21 12:40 PM
302

They have the ‘pretend to respect women to get along’ mask on as default, but feel they are entitled to drop it with someone they’re so intimate with, because it’s hard work lying about your true self 24/7.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/21 11:46 PM
9

After I was vaccinated I did OLD and was going on approx one new date a week. As I absorbed FDS principles more I went on less and less new dates as they all messed up before the first date (usually during the vetting call) and I developed zero tolerance policy so was down to rotation of one due to high standards. Came off OLD a few months ago and finished with the bloke. Since then I’ve met five decent new guys in the wild (through a sport) who’ve made it clear they fancy me, but they’re not as…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/12/21 07:44 AM
13

Thanks 💛inspired me to google some events/shows for 2022
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/12/21 06:57 AM
51

I loved it when one of Carrie’s friends said ‘Why has everyone forgotten he abused her for years?’ during the ‘white scene’ due to Big’s ‘outcome’. I was always Team Aiden. Big was a pig. His only redeeming feature they portrayed throughout the original series was enjoying bad jazz. Listening to records is not a personality. In the first episode of the new series he won’t even go to the piano recital with Carrie. Such a selfish tosser.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/12/21 06:30 AM
65

Sounds like you’ve nailed a good dating strategy! Do you mind me asking what kind of cultural events you attend solo?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/21 11:53 PM
17

I have beard blindness in that if there are a few guys in the room with a beard I can’t tell the difference between them, and if I see them again I won’t recognise them. My brain just filters them out. I think they make good looking guys unattractive.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/21 04:02 AM
12

This 👆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/12/21 08:34 AM
91

When friends have done this for me the man has thought it was all my idea and they expected me to chase! In their minds you have asked them out and they put you in the desperate category.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/12/21 01:52 PM
152

🤦🏼‍♀️this! Women I know using dating apps think: meeting complete stranger off internet for date = have sex. Even car sex! And they all want relationships. A friend of mine who is actually bloody lovely and high value in every other way forgoes the walking part and invites strange men off apps over to her house for ‘drinks’ (at least she doesn’t give them dinner I suppose). Then she sleeps with them and is upset when it doesn’t work out. I believe if this happens to a man once or twice it works …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/12/21 03:30 PM
2

😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/21 11:26 PM
75

So sorry OP - such a frightening experience for you. At the risk of being overly dramatic.. the way he did this so casually, then texted you a casual excuse afterwards, could mean he has done this before and succeeded and will do it again. His text also tries to cover up the strangling so he can say in court he tried to kiss you not strangle you. You should report him. I’m not sure how long ago this happened but he may now be a serial rapist or killer. It’s tip offs from women who survive these …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/21 01:08 PM
105

He has a Y chromosome.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/21 01:26 AM
19

And whose name do the children have?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/21 09:46 PM
12

Love this advice. I interpreted that was to be done when the new boyfriend invites himself over to your place ‘to watch a movie’. I’ve always served popcorn during the movie then when they hint they are feeling peckish I have a little look around the kitchen and boil up hot dogs! It’s because they are used to pickmes preparing 3 course meals that they are so surprised when you don’t. I’m not a fan of waiting on men and no man has ever gone out with me expecting me to be the ‘maid’ part of the mo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/21 09:10 PM
207

When a woman sets boundaries he doesn’t like they call her boundaries ‘childish’. Deflection. Also ‘you’re the only girlfriend who has ever had a problem with X’. He’s lying but both tactics combined makes you question your own boundaries.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/12/21 06:37 PM
25

Lmao I received 15 minute ‘you’re so childish’ tantrums from an ex every time I reminded him of boundaries we’d already agreed on, but he was breaking again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/21 10:46 AM
31

Love that you wrote that 💛
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/21 10:31 AM
53

Yes! It’s a shit test especially when they’re asking you to travel for an hour to drink it with them too! Thank god for FDS - I now see this for what it is. Before I wouldn’t have travelled for a first date but if they’d suggested coffee/drinks in my town I would have said yes. It’s actually quite insulting when you view it through an FDS lens.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/21 10:10 AM
89

Of all the pathetic kinks to be shackled with, golden showers is truly pitiful
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/21 05:39 PM
97

Thanks OP. I agree with everything in this post. I used to really worry is it him or it my trauma? Here’s what I believe now: 1) As we know from this sub the majority of men are LVM so the majority of the time it will be him. Presume it’s him. 2) As we are exposed over and over to traumatic behaviour from different men our bodies become more attuned to detecting it and better at intuiting it early by putting together multiple bits of info/microexpressions/patterns. It also turns up the volume on…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/11/21 01:41 AM
65

Snap! I want a castle in France 🏰
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/21 09:08 PM
130

I wonder if these old dudes on OLD are so used to getting approached by young prostitutes/sugar babies/pay to interact girls on the apps, that their ego gets boosted and they think this means they are in with a chance with all young women that aren’t paying. Like wishful delusional thinking. I saw a catfishing doc and despite incontrovertible evidence he’d been duped for money by a gang who’d stolen the identity of a model, the ugly, really old, married man still thought the gorgeous young woman…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/21 09:07 PM
53

They coined the phrase ‘alls fair in love and war’. They get a prideful feeling, and applause from their bros when they successfully manipulate a woman into bed. They compare it to ‘conquering’ an enemy. If we get hurt it’s just collateral damage. There is no guilt or shame because they don’t feel guilt they feel pride! This is what I could never understand because if I had to lie to a guy in order to get sex I would feel guilt and then shame if he found out I’d lied. Projection on our part make…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/11/21 01:13 PM
31

This is the type of guy who goes to the OLD catalogue to look for his girlfriend. If you turn up look pretty, seem sweet that’s all he wants. A good way to smoke him out is to see how he acts when you’re not on a date night. Does he pick up the phone to interact with you or does he lazily send a text. Does he ask after your sick mother or never bring up this important worry in your life. From my experience this year the guys I met in OLD were this shallow relationship type or they were manipulat…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/11/21 11:59 AM
123

Very astute post OP! I also find it hard not to roll my eyes in social situations after FDS. So many scrotes trying to boost their ego and status by ‘charming’ everyone. I now find the calm, quieter men look so much more confident and more attractive to me at events. I admire them for not needing to desperately scramble around the room. It’s not ‘sociable’ it’s desperation for attention. The last wedding I went to I was sat opposite a man and his beautiful wife where the dude dicn’t stop making …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/11/21 11:37 AM
8

Accurate! And why are so many guys wanting to be the princess? Oestrogen in the drinking water? Such a turn off but it’s epidemic 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/11/21 03:30 AM
46

He’ll just gaslight her by telling her she’s insecure or apologise and just do it again. What she needs is a man who would never do this in the first place because he knows it is disrespectful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/21 07:39 PM
38

I agree it is disrespectful and inappropriate and he does this because he needs female validation. The behaviour will return and it will escalate into coming onto women in front of you. ‘I’m just a friendly guy’ was my LVX’s favourite comeback but staying with him so long shattered my self esteem in the end. He also had a LV friendship group - his best friend lied to his wife a lot and it turned out my LVX lied to me too. He had a harem of dodgy women friends who he ‘gave up’ for me but he culti…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/21 12:45 AM
10

Do you think your close friend or other friends will have told him already? I hope not. You’d better find out. In a perfect world you wouldn’t lie but I wish I had lied more about personal stuff early on in relationships. As you know from reading this sub it is common for LVM to use our personal history against us later on. If he finds out it was a lie, once he’s in love with you, you can simply say that it was a very personal topic that you didn’t want to discuss with a complete stranger so you…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/21 12:23 AM
32

Also scrotes think of us as objects that can be gamified - coaches promise they have the cheat codes to unlock us
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 06:52 PM
31

Oh that’s interesting! I’ve had two dates recently say they thought their wrists were too small! I’m a size 8 UK (usa 4) and an ex told me I was beautiful but ‘had a bit of a tum tum’. I’ve had a bad complex about my stomach ever since then so get exactly how you felt - even tho common sense tells me my stomach is ok just how it is..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 06:48 PM
38

At the end before he gets the chance to initiate a kiss I initiate the goodbye with a brief hug while still talking ‘so great to meet you etc.’ then leave with a quick wave which signals there will be no kiss and then there’s no awkward moment. Also don’t tell him he’s your first date. If he asks about your last relationship say something vague that you’ve prepared. At this point it’s none of his business. Enjoy it - I guarantee you will relax after the first few minutes..unless he’s no fun or s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 06:20 PM
35

I agree - my sister and I discussed hiring a PI to confirm I should divorce my husband but a) like you say, his behaviour was sketchy enough to leave anyway and b) in one afternoon we did our own snooping and investigation and managed to put together our own incontrovertible proof. Ladies we are intelligent enough to outsmart scrotes. Any kit a PI uses like e.g. a car tracker etc. can be bought online for your own DIY job but trust your gut and you won’t even need that. Also as his wife you can …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 05:59 PM
71

This - word for word I’ve had the same experience as you. They do all have the same scrote patterns! Dating with the FDS lens also made me realise that the guys I was meeting on the dating apps were without exception NVM and coming off the apps has decentered men from my now lovely, peaceful life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/21 11:01 PM
4

Creepy 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/21 11:09 AM
26

Yeah even if what his father said is factual, he could have protected you from the hurt of the comment by not disclosing it. Best case he doesn’t consider a future with you (or he would need you to like his family and would never disclose the comment), worst case, it’s the first test for emotional abuse to lower your self esteem. If he simply wanted to ‘share’ his emotional hurt by telling you, as you say: no back bone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/21 10:59 AM
77

Do they gaslight other men in the same way, say at work or in their social group, if they are caught doing something bad? Or is it reserved for relationships? Or maybe they are prepared to risk a relationship with bad behaviour because they don’t value it, but won’t risk upsetting their bros so don’t need to gaslight them? 🧐
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/21 10:44 AM
31

I used to worry about this in new relationships but with hindsight I can look back and see my gut was always right about the men, but their nice guy mask was confusing me - not the other way around. Trust your instincts. Snoop on his phone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/21 12:34 AM
9

And in Aquaman!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/11/21 12:09 AM
127

It’s not you, it’s online dating. They are only there for sex, and they get sex from pickmes. If men turned to online dating to find a relationship, you’d be in hot demand.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/21 08:20 PM
83

Lmao - my hairdresser’s boyfriend told her she had a ‘wizard’s sleeve’ and she clapped back with your response - he didn’t speak to her for a week! If she had got all offended instead of snarking back, guaranteed he would have said CaN’t You tAKe a JOke
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/21 09:36 AM
51

At a theme park this summer I noticed a pattern: men would go on the ride with their kid, I’d be sitting nearby or in the queue with mine, then they would strike up conversation with me in a flirty way and give me all this eye contact during the rides. They act like single dads then when we get off the ride, a final flirty look then they join their wife who was waiting for them obliviously. Once I noticed this I couldn’t unsee it and it made me feel sick as it happened on every single ride. I sw…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/21 04:06 AM
307

Or ‘saying ‘you look nervous’ during a first date. I’m never truly nervous so this is a neg - they should be bending over backwards to put you at ease not pointing out something that will make you more uncomfortable to hear.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/21 03:45 AM
75

Also guys who get fall down drunk at parties or places you go out together and you end up looking after them and helping them get home/into a taxi. Such a turn off - also guys that abandon you when they get to the venue to work the room without a backward glance. Anything could happen to a woman in a space full of drinkers - they have no protective masculine instincts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/21 03:37 AM
50

This really triggered me - I’m seething with anger - just wow. No one has dared say this to me but I’ve been on dates when I know they’re thinking that at the end - when the ‘nice guy’ face mask drops off
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 05:22 PM
52

Omg yes I couldn’t believe this when I saw the trailer!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 01:29 AM
91

I dunno if I’m unfairly prejudiced, but guys who declare they are passionate about or heavily into music.. listening to music is not a personality. If you’re no longer a teenager and put music on super loud for hours at a time to listen to by yourself as your only hobby, its a personality disorder.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/21 04:08 PM
108

Calling it a mushroom makes it sound so gross and warty 🤢🤢🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/21 03:21 PM
76

Why do all guys look up to him? I find it so odd. With the fantasy dinner party guest thing they all want David Attenborough there - even the youngsters who you’d think had never heard of him. I asked my lvx and he said it is because he is a ‘legend’..erm he is a broadcaster who mostly does voiceovers..just why
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/21 01:59 AM
31

If I had done this in all my previous relationships, my longest relationship would have been a few months and my life would have been extremely peaceful
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/21 11:51 AM
2

Thanks! Rose looks just like Kate - PW obviously has a type! It was only when she broke up with PW that he got his act together and proposed. Humiliating to be called Waitey Katie all that time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/21 01:23 AM
17

Any advice on where we should record our passwords? Thx!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/21 01:15 AM
37

Six hours of alcohol, then they both drive home 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/21 08:08 PM
13

snorts😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/21 10:11 AM
59

Another guy on reddit just wanting to brag that he had sex because it never happens for him normally so is a major event: ‘Woo I just spent the night with a 52 yr old…’ It’s pure glee. He’s making up ‘problems’ so he can gloat and carry on thinking about it. Sad as f*#k
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/21 10:07 AM
12

Second this!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/11/21 09:53 AM
81

In the same way that we feel validated and heard by each other which makes our beliefs stronger here at FDS, I wonder if shitty men finding each other on the internet and validating each other’s shitty nonesense is the biggest reason for scrote growth
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/21 06:15 PM
51

I get UTIs if they’re not clean! Even if the guy I’m sleeping with claims he showered just before we met up I will not let him put it in me until he has a shower or washes it in the sink. Tbh it’s never been an issue with my exes they were sweethearts about it. Where dildos have the upper hand is: they don’t cheat!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/21 12:09 PM
6

Tell me more! Have not read anything about this in the uk but our media is censored when it comes to the royal family..so what have you heard?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/21 11:55 AM
47

‘Partying’ in scrotese = going out intentionally to ask as many strangers as possible for sex in the hopes that one says yes
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/21 11:48 AM
18

I swallow - spitting seemed weird to me - it’s already in your mouth! Seemed a bit churlish to reject it and spit. Now, after FDS, I wonder if I swallow because performative femininity states that it is sexier to men and I internalised that early on. The alternative is to pull away when he comes but that’s so messy. I’m toying with the idea of refusing blowjobs altogether in my next relationship because now I think men get off on it because it is humiliating and see it in porn.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/21 11:51 AM
97

When he crossed my boundaries and I dumped him I was told: ‘Don’t throw the baby out with the bath water’ ‘Don’t cut off your nose to spite your face’
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/21 12:08 AM
70

And the tiny interactions they had with different women on the pub crawls. They go into minute detail about how close they were to manipulating some stranger to go home and fuck them. They even brag about their near misses. We are objects.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/21 10:35 AM
29

Or 😏or😉
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/21 10:12 AM
49

My LVX could never understand why I felt sorry for his LV friends. They’d known each other for years yet couldn’t be in each others company (visiting in their own homes on their sofas) without doing lines of coke. Plus all the alcohol and the cigs/weed all night too. They were all on antidepressants but couldn’t connect the dots. My thoughts were, did they see each other as an excuse to do coke or did they do coke so they could bear to see each other? Either way they can’t have liked each other …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/21 10:08 AM
202

Crikey sorry OP that would scare me. Personally because I’m quite jumpy I’d lock the car doors, and listen to him briefly through the closed window (in case he had something legit to tell me) and nod and point in the direction of the lake when he asked, then drive off. Any guy with ‘good intentions’ would not approach a woman on her own in a quiet parking place so he would deserve to be cut off mid sentence. Also because I’m cautious I wouldn’t go back there alone but find somewhere else to walk…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/21 12:37 AM
96

She’s the only woman that’s expressed an interest in having sex with him for years, and he wanted to brag about it without appearing to brag about it
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/11/21 05:54 PM
32

Hard agree and especially look through his text conversations with his best mate. LVX was a whole different person in those conversations - disgusted me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/11/21 02:20 PM
85

Ratio was 7 men to 1 woman at my university and they still had golden penis syndrome
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/11/21 02:12 PM
33

Same. 🤢🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/11/21 02:08 PM
30

In the UK guys would be turned down by some cautious women for dinner and the women would suggest drinks instead so I give them one chance to step up. Drinks and coffee have been normalised in the culture here for a first date. So if I’m asked for drinks by a guy I know in real life I say ‘I don’t do drinks or coffee for a first date. You can ask me on a date though!’ and smile. That’s it, then wait for their reponse. No apologies or giggling just an assertive way of showing them how to please y…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/21 11:36 AM
31

When I was on OLD I put it on my profile in the prompts. Things like the prompt on hinge: “best way to ask me out is…” I wrote: ‘ask me to lunch. The way to my heart is through my stomach’. Guys mostly suggested lunch or dinner. Those that didn’t were obvs not trying to win my heart!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/21 10:43 AM
84

I made a man sleep in the spare bedroom for the rest of the night then dumped him in the morning when he jack hammered for a few minutes then rolled over and tried to go to sleep. It was our first and last time after months of vetting. So disappointed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/21 10:30 AM
42

Thanks for the links. I enjoy playing role playing games (e.g. assassins creed/dragon age 3) on the xbox but only if you have the option of playing as a woman. Apart from obvious reasons like it feels more immersive, by virtue of having a woman as a heroine the writers can’t include creepy sexist dialogue or rapey scenes in the story as a whole. Also the writers make the romance options better to suit a female audience. Cullen Rutherford anyone? Swoon 💛
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/21 10:01 AM
3

They equate intimacy with a loss of independence and constantly try to minimize closeness. If they aren’t self-aware they may not see this in themselves. It can be caused by how they attached to their parental figure as a child or can develop because of other life experiences. They represent about 25% of the population. Because of their condition they keep getting recycled back into the dating world. 75% of men on dating apps are therefore estimated to be avoidant because they do seek connection…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/11/21 12:29 PM
87

He swatted a huge moth. It fell right in front of us with a thud and landed in his very thick rug in front of the sofa where we walked all the time in bare feet. Because it was in the dark rug and not visible he left it there. Me: are you going to leave the dead moth in your rug? Him: yes Me: 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/11/21 04:20 PM
131

When asked what started his obsession with killing and raping women, Ted Bundy said it was consuming porn. He said he soon became obsessed with it and then ‘needed’ to see ‘niche’ porn of violence against women. And this was the 70s so it was only photos in magazines - nothing like as bad as the hardcore films men consume every day. He also claimed every one of his cellmates admitted that they had been addicted to hardcore porn. His girlfriend said he had a limp dick after a few years. That woul…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/21 08:37 PM
60

Watch out for emotionally avoidant men who aren’t narcs but ruin ‘celebration’ occasions because it triggers in him an impulse to distance himself from you. The prospect of a romantic fun night out or weekend away may make you feel closer and warmer towards him but it will make him feel the need to lob in an argument triggering grenade to prevent him from allowing you and him to share too much emotional intimacy. Pointless arguments, him bringing up other women or a side glance at an attractive …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/21 10:44 AM
16

A friend told me that he knows a woman he works with and does the same job as him earns 6k less and he thinks it’s ‘disgusting’. I told him to tell her and he said he won’t because she’s quite ‘vocal’ and would ruffle feathers! They will never give up their power. We will have to take it back.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/10/21 04:59 PM
14

Yep - this
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/10/21 09:03 PM
38

Wouldn’t he have his willy out if it was porn tho? 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/10/21 05:08 PM
8

Went through this exact same thing last year - life so peaceful without that scrote now!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 12:16 PM
23

This, this and this 💛. It wasn’t until I saw a therapist who pointed out ‘they know’ that I realised…they know it’s disrespectful and hurtful! I will always leave at first sign of this too and never argue with them about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 12:08 PM
40

You watch his fingers/screen when he puts his pass code in. Sometimes you may only spot a few numbers but write them down, and eventually you’ll have the entire passcode. Then you just wait till he showers or is snoring 💤
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 11:57 AM
35

An official letter from a solicitor’s firm asking him to leave me alone or I would take further action worked on a stalker ex. Never heard from him again. Suddenly he could perceive consequences from people/institutions he ‘respected’.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/10/21 11:29 AM
40

Classic that she said she has now become an expert on internet scammers: what to look for/why they do it etc. just like each of us has had to become experts on personality disorders or why abusers abuse… all that lovely knowledge- all to work out why scrotes are being so hideous. Such a sad waste of our time. Plus it’s men scamming other men!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/21 11:41 PM
36

Me too - since I quit drinking I can’t tolerate being around drunk men - zero tolerance. And if a guy drinks more than one and drives after a date with me there’s no second date. Lmao when I used to drink I thought guys who didn’t drink would be boring but now tables have turned and there’s nothing more boring than a man with squinty eyes and laughing so hard at his own unfunny jokes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/10/21 09:38 PM
17

🤦🏼‍♀️…the number of times I believed the ‘I’m changing’ line
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/10/21 09:23 PM
3

Thx
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/21 08:56 AM
4

Thx
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/10/21 08:56 AM
9

Any tips what to look for?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/21 10:14 PM
255

I had similar experience to you except the guy agreed to stop. He did stop seeing all his girl friends (tho I never asked him to do this I just asked for better boundaries) but he continued to seek validation from ANY woman in any small way. Guys with girl BFFs are often insecure and need women to bolster their ego. He also was triangulating you early on with them. He wanted a jealous response for his ego to feel secure. You dodged a bullet sis.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/21 01:18 PM
4

I agree - she didn’t say anything that was misogynistic
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/21 11:30 AM
8

Without getting too personal (!) do you kiss men you’re dating after a few dates? And when you do does it - ahem - generally turn you on? I’m asking because I have no desire to sleep with someone until about 3 months in, we’re in love, he’s my boyf etc. but I’ve never considered myself demi. I do enjoy kissing tho. Not every single man I kiss will ‘turn me on’ either but I’ve always considered that as normal too. Often I can like a guy’s personality, think he’s nice to look at but won’t know if …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/21 10:51 AM
81

Thanks for this OP - can you recommend a youtube video that explains how women get trafficked into porn against their will and how they are mistreated? I’m looking for something to watch with my 11 year old son without explicit images. He’s not been exposed to porn yet but we’re discussing it so he’s prepared.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/10/21 10:28 AM
52

I’d like to hear thoughts from other FDSers too. I think not phoning inbetween dates is a sign of being avoidant attachment. And online dating attracts these guys like bees to the honey especially because they can type at a screen rather than have in person / onphone interactions. I came across this behaviour a lot during online dating. Pre FDS I’d mention to them I’d like phone calls and they would start calling, but later show themselves to be emotionally unavailable in other ways during the r…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 09:53 AM
9

I’d book a video call in half an hour before I was due to go out for the night, that way I’d done all my makeup and was making no extra effort for a complete stranger who may chicken out of calling anyway. I do prefer phone calls tho - I can concentrate better on what they say. Most guys don’t get past phone call stage as their LVM behaviour shows up. It’s the best vetting tool I learnt from FDS. Absolutely invaluable!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 09:20 AM
43

This. It’s a hard pill to swallow.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 08:59 AM
110

It happens again the other side too when you get divorced! The marrieds only want to socialise with marrieds! Not your good friends tho 💛
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/21 08:50 AM
31

I asked a solicitor friend to send a stalking ex an official letter from her firm telling him to cease and desist or further action would be taken - never heard a peep from him again
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 04:02 PM
39

Same. The majority of them want to be chased and it’s such a turn off. They’re used to pickmes chasing them so I don’t think they’re even gutted they lost out with me. It’s so odd that these scrawny, bald, old, so-not-in-my-league guys try and low ball me when they get their shot, or experiment with hot and cold treatment to see if that will start me chasing. That’s when I bail. They’re genuinely happier having a pickme. The pickme behaviour does in fact work because they get picked (by LVM).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 11:17 AM
96

Hi - I’ve been with a few women in my life… Hi - I’m a pornsick teenager who’s had zero real life women experience and so I have to encourage other men to neg them about their vaginas, coz I’ve not seen one to neg. Ever. Except in porn. Wish I could see a real one hurr durr muh peen..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 12:38 AM
77

Lmao - yes they all cry like babies with floods of tears and snot running out of their noses! Even when because of the shitty thing they’ve done I should be the one crying! I always think hmmm crocodile tears..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/21 12:59 AM
15

IT guys I’ve dated have been loaded but tight with their money
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 09:42 PM
5

Agree - it’s so boring and hot and hurty when you burn yourself :) also my heart sinks when I’m on a date with a self-proclaimed foody/cook - that’s all they want to talk about
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 11:33 PM
11

On bumble, pickmes lead and organise the men into 50/50 coffee dates, initiate everything so the men expect to be chased on it. If they don’t get sex on a first date the men have exerted no effort and simply go on a date which the next pickme has organised. A phone call that the men are expected to initiate is extra effort for them. A phone call before meeting is also a boundary so it means I’m not the type to have sex on first date, or they are married so its hard to find a time to chat. The gu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 02:51 PM
43

I had to ‘train’ myself to get over major ick first to enjoy it. Just because the mouth is O shaped doesn’t give a man the right to stick it in. I’ve just realised its because of porn they all want it. They secretly look down on us for doing it. They know its icky which is why they get off on it - power and humiliation. Ditto receiving oral sex. Major ick first then it feels good but their fingers would be just as nice. It’s for the man - makes them feel like the great lovers they see on porn. M…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 02:29 PM
7

I have to admit this is how I used bumble (tho I looked a lot less desperate as I swiped). Every guy on there I swiped matched me (because they were doing what this guy did) then I’d follow up with a copy paste greeting but put their name in it, and then reply only to guys that replied with a message that showed they read my profile. I would keep it to batches of 20 convos and maybe get one potential that I fancied and had the right chat. Then he would act like a little princess after a few exch…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 10:39 AM
388

Blowjobs
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 12:40 AM
23

Nothing remarkable- not even his audacity 💀💀
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/21 02:41 PM
28

So doesn’t the law cited in this case mean we could put the whole of the reddit manosphere in prison for 6 months? https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/2003/21/section/127i Here’s the law: (1) A person is guilty of an offence if he— (a) sends by means of a public electronic communications network a message or other matter that is grossly offensive or of an indecent, obscene or menacing character; or (b) causes any such message or matter to be so sent. (2) A person is guilty of an offence if, for…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/21 01:47 PM
23

💛
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/21 12:35 PM
19

Ok thx - feel less jaded now
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/21 12:25 PM
448

He no longer h@tes women but is trolling the internet looking for ways to laugh at women. Dude - you still h@te women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/21 10:58 AM
6

This! I went on 3 dates with a guy who managed to bring up his ‘preventative’ sports massage therapist on every date. She comes to his house every two weeks and clearly he is fantasising about her because he had no reason to bring her up naturally in the conversation and monologue about her each time. I had an ex who brought up his ex casually in conversation on every date. He was still seeing her regularly too as mates. I finished with him because of this but after slinging all the ‘insecure an…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/21 10:48 AM
6

The amount of time they must spend on FDS studying it, combined with the amount of time invested in spoofing it is frightening.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/21 10:29 AM
6

Agree - they sound like spotty teenagers
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/21 10:19 AM
13

This is a HVM proposal for sure and puts some of my proposals to shame..but it makes me laugh that HE posted this. She should have done. He’s virtue bragging about how wonderful and cleverly thought out it all was. No mention of how lovely his girlfriend is - just him wanting applause for his amazing efforts 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/21 09:52 AM
3

Happy bday! Wicked is awesome you will 💛it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/21 09:26 AM
73

This! Or when he said he would be having drinks before we even meet. Disrespectful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/21 09:20 AM
11

Yup - thx! Another realisation about how extremely LV and porn sick my LVX actually was.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/21 12:27 PM
56

If he is a narc, any response, good or bad, will give him what he wants: supply. Block.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/21 12:05 PM
14

Do you know, the ONE thing I get choked up about when I realise that all men are trash and my high standards will never be met, is missing cuddling up on the sofa and watching a horror film with a man 😂 this makes me tear up (then I laugh at myself for crying)..I can’t get a dog/cat because of where I live and my son is too young for horror so: major hole in my life
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/21 08:34 AM
50

This. Do you think it’s because pickmes chase them so their egos are overinflated? And pickmes are abundant?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/21 09:31 PM
2

What’s he got on his shirt? Pieces of fruit and polka dots??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/21 09:22 AM
150

Guys who study any aspect of personality or body language tend to use it to straight up manipulate other people, wheras women study it to understand or get along better with people (for positive not nefarious reasons i.e. to build rapport not to trick them into bed quicker) or to avoid and spot dangerous people.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/21 09:12 AM
2

Thanks - yes only fans is good way of introducing porn as it’s topical and also it avoids having to say the word ‘porn’.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/21 09:04 AM
3

Thanks - yes only fans is good way of introducing porn topic while avoiding having to say the word ‘porn’..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/21 09:01 AM
88

I’ve heard it’s 1000% more addictive because the scrotes feel like they’re actually doing it to a real woman, but the post nut shame is much much worse. Because not many studios are making it, men burn through what is available and ‘good’ pretty quick and have to wait for new releases so end up watching less porn after the first few months of hyperactivity. They also report going off 2d porn as it doesn’t do it for them as much any more. Currently there aren’t that many fetishes catered for eith…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/21 10:47 AM
13

Do you have something to say that worked for you, that you can mention on a first date (or the vetting phone call!!)? Thx!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/21 10:38 AM
37

‘Immature’ is what scrotes call you when they know their behaviour is/was wrong but they’d rather you’d graciously overlook it and give them a second chance 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/21 03:56 PM
8

My friend and her husband are teachers with two kids who live in a boarding school. Because she eats organically and is careful about what they put in their bodies they refuse to get vaccinated. If the whole country had this attitude we would still be in lockdown and millions dying. It’s so utterly selfish. We all took a calculated risk having the vaccine but it was for the greater good. I have more sympathy for conspiracy nutters - at least their reasoning isn’t so selfish. And working in a sch…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/21 11:21 AM
14

Thank you for this post OP 💛
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/21 10:54 AM
20

Same!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 09:32 AM
45

They all want to be chased 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 09:20 AM
64

My LVX did this, accused me of being insecure and my self-esteem plummeted. If you stay with him you will always be hyper alert to every woman in the vicinity to see if he is checking them out and you will never relax. Let’s say he has some strange ‘scanning tic’ that makes him seem like he is checking everyone out but he is only thinking innocent thoughts? You will still suffer from his behaviour, and feel disrespected regardless of his ‘intentions’. I think he is already setting you up for som…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 04:15 PM
110

An ex scrote was worried about ED because he couldn’t always come so I suggested he stopped masturbating and he was SHOCKED by how much of a difference it made to sex for him. Don’t they have the same internet we do? I could always tell when he fell off the wagon after that 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/21 10:04 PM
15

This! 1000 X this!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/21 09:28 AM
112

I agree but I reckon they get rewards from being an ass - a small feeling of power over others, validation from like minded scrotes is also a reward. I expect dopamine is released right before abusive behaviour towards women, to make them abuse so they feel that ‘power over’ women. Even for abuse like lying or gaslighting or stonewalling or cheating. As women if we’re not socialised to believe that ‘power over’ is something to strive for, our brain doesn’t reward it and we find their behaviour i…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/21 01:29 PM
59

Never heard of a clearer example of gaslighting - so sorry he put you through that. Now you will be able to spot gaslighters the first moment they try to pull their BS
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/21 09:42 AM
1

My LVX: I’m adventurous and a risk taker Yeah plenty of adventures on your sofa taking risks by sticking toxic chemicals into your body. That’s it. Zero travel, zero sports, zero hobbies and a boring IT job you hate, then home to your adventurous sofa for video games and drugs🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 10:32 PM
174

I’ve always believed all men cheat (from being cheated on) then I meet someone seemingly decent who is or acts as if they are totally in love with me, proclaim they are in love with me, it’s mutual, love hormones are making me feel great, so I drop my guard and believe in them, in us, have hope, then they cheat on me. Rinse and repeat.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 04:19 PM
35

With a minecraft duvet cover 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/21 01:56 PM
166

“Uncertainty is the rocket fuel of limerence. Fortunately, it is partly within your control to end it. Take the uncertainty away, and you remove hope, remove promise, remove the tantalising possibility that maybe sometime in the future if you can crack the code and seduce LO in just the right way you could be together.” This is from the book you mentioned and it’s true. As soon as I block a guy, I stop obsessing about him because I’ve removed the uncertainty. Your brain relaxes and heaves a sigh…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/21 12:58 AM
39

It is so common. Anyone have any pithy phrases they can suggest after the scrote says ‘you’re being insecure?’
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/09/21 09:44 AM
37

I went on a date with a dude that gave me similar vibes to your experience. Turns out it was his birthday and he just wanted to have lunch with a hot blonde! No intentions of seeing me again. When he sat down his hands were shaking and I thought hmmm alcoholic or punching above his weight??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/21 06:43 AM
102

In the article he links to, it gives away the real homoerotic reason many guys are redpilled: “As for guys – the majority of them will think you’re a fucking superhero for having the courage to talk to random girls and introduce yourself to them. They’ll wonder how the hell you’re able to do something that to them is utterly unfathomable; you’ll seem like a God. As long as you’re being polite about it, most people will revere you for talking to girls.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/21 09:50 AM
1

His best friend’s girlfriend...what a lovely human being - sh*ts on the two people in his life he should be caring for the most
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/21 09:27 AM
7

Powerful last paragraph in this article: ‘Man’s inhumanity to woman is a deep, enduring part of all our lives throughout history, throughout the present, whatever sector or demographic or region you care to examine. No, #notallmen, but always some men and always – especially when the normal restraints are loosened by money, power or fame – more men than you think.’
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/21 09:13 AM
16

So screwed up 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/21 08:38 AM
105

I seethe with anger when I see large family groups gathered for an outdoor eating celebration, like a multigenerational family picnic, and see all the women bustling around preparing food, being ‘busy’ while the men stand or sit in groups with their drinks, chatting and not lifting a finger to help. Even grandma in her nineties is busy serving up food to the lazy-ass men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/21 11:26 PM
8

Cake by the ocean!🍰
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/21 08:31 PM
7

Snap! I went on a date with a handsome well known athlete from bumble recently! I get how you were feeling. I found myself subconsciously showing off a bit on the date but that could be because I really fancied him! I blocked him reluctantly because he started playing hot and cold. I think he uses bumble for sex. I can imagine from his profile that a lot of women would pursue him and sleep with him on the first date then inadvertently become part of his harem. Hope this works out for you but you…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/21 03:44 PM
9

Look Away
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/21 11:04 AM
23

Sky documentary about Steve Tyler and Axl Rose on last night - proof they abused and r*ped underage girls yet the music industry has remained silent.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/09/21 08:28 AM
1

Soo similar - he would even ‘charm’ at shop checkouts with queues of people glaring at him! On a train journey he was messing around with my son and it made a woman across the aisle smile. He noticed and boy did he ramp up the funny nice guy routine abd kept slyly checking to see if she was watching. She was not conventionally attractive but it was the attention he lived for. I was ignored the whole journey and felt very down afterwards, but so strange looking back that I just accepted his whole…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/21 11:17 AM
20

This is the part that makes me mad. All the bumbling, pretending they didn’t know it would hurt, the ‘I had good intentions’ line - and they were just laughing on the other side of their face as we explain why their actions hurt us. Then the ‘but you did xyz’ deflection come back to make us have to defend ourselves and we explain why it’s not the same. They know it’s not. They don’t care. They just want you off the topic so you don’t leave them and then they self-congratulate when you stick arou…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/21 09:16 AM
22

Are they self-aware enough to know they hate their mother figures?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/21 07:55 PM
97

Yes this is such a trap for us! I’ve found the only way to dodge this is to wait until they bring up the ‘exclusive talk’ then sweetly nail them down on the terms and conditions by asking them curious questions about what exclusive means to them. ‘What does that mean to you?’ ‘Are you asking me to be your girlfriend?’ If they squirm and say ‘no’ just ask ‘so what’s the difference between being exclusive and being your girlfriend?’ Act as if you are a bit dumb and innocent if need be. Settle into…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/09/21 01:03 PM
69

Same! Cyclist = fit. Fit = good stamina in bed. They’re projecting. They think it’ll make them look like a good sexual prospect as that’s all they’re looking for in women’s photos 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/21 01:52 PM
146

Walking behind you = red flag. LVX often walked slower behind me when out shopping or out in public and I would notice, apologise, and slow down to walk next to him. He’d smile and say ‘don’t worry walk ahead I don’t mind’. Thought it was a bit odd but I’m quite targeted when shopping so thought he was being all laid back and nice. I also don’t pay much attention to strangers around me, but one day I saw a girl approaching us giving him the serious eye. Turned to him and he was doing it back! He…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/21 01:34 AM
78

Yuck I hate it when guys ask anything about your dating life. It’s so ungentlemanly esp. when they are a complete stranger.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 09:09 AM
28

The book says if we are limerent we should seek out guys who also experience limerence or the relationship won’t work - I’ll just add that to the long checklist then 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/21 05:18 PM
61

Epic episode - I’ve signed up for the conference. I have a question - as a public figure did Gail Dines tell you if she receives similar vitriolic hate mail and if so how does she live with this? Has experience taught her it’s all hot air or does she take security measures everywhere?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/09/21 11:49 AM
61

The new cinderella musical on Prime with Camilla Cabello has her choosing her dreams over marriage with the prince and she said ‘how can I be in love after knowing him for just one night’
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/21 09:28 PM
136

You could crowdfund to find and prosecute this jerk. There would be so much publicity in it if you do it the right way. Also publicity for the law firm that takes it on. The tides are turning. It’s only illegal to post intimate photos of someone online this year because one person took it all the way. There must be some solicitor FDS ladies, journalists, police peeps among us. I’d play my part and do media stuff in my country if we had a plan. His pikachu face would be priceless.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/21 01:01 PM
36

189,538 - we’ll hit 200,000 FDS members soon! 🎉🎈💃🥂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/21 10:13 PM
70

I think sex drives vary from man to man but they all project much more than women do. So a guy with a high sex drive presumes everyone is thinking about shagging all the time just like he does. As OP is attractive he thinks about shagging her so she must be thinking about shagging him. Source: my LVX
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/21 12:59 PM
311

I agree and I think its’s also often to do with needing to hide the depth of their addictions. My LVX said he’d never got married because he was afraid of being suffocated but upon reflection I think he meant he didn’t want to be restricted from being able to have all his addictions, which included porn, alcohol, weed, coke, scratch cards and video games. Oh yeah he was a peach. I know none of you judge, but to be fair to myself he hid all these from me for a long time via the method of LYING 🤥
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/21 11:46 AM
103

Be thankful for nothing on the walls. My LVX ‘decorated’ with colourful holographs/3D pictures of wild animals. The type that move when you do. He was in his forties.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/21 11:33 AM
36

Thx sis - attacker’s pikachu face when he is whipped 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/21 01:06 PM
27

Thanks for this sis - theres also tiny sized wolf spray on this site that ships to my country.. will consider this too - 🤗
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/21 12:39 PM
50

There’s one at the moment that’s been up voted 50 000 times which is a screen shot of a tinder exchange where the guy drops a few corny lines and the woman plays along and invites herself over for sex. All the guys in the comments are going gah gah goo goo over his prowess THE KING..THIS IS HOW TO DO IT ..RESPECT IF ONLY ALL WOMEN WERE LIKE THIS ..MUST BE NICE BEING A GOOD LOOKING GUY but the dude is german and the woman is german and they wouldn’t have a long convo in english like this! It’s so…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/21 12:18 PM
49

What do you carry? I was thinking about buying wasp spray or similar but the cans aren’t practical to carry as they’re really bulky. I’m certain a kn*fe would end up being used back on me so bad idea. I’ve been attacked late at night by men in cities around the world but I’m a fast runner so have always out run them. Now I never go out for walks/runs/cycle by myself in nature where it is even slightly remote. I do get nervous walking back to my car after a night out and choose to park in a safe …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/21 11:08 AM
85

Thanks OP - does anyone know what number 8 refers to? Can you name 1 company which is currently abducting and exploiting men and boys to impregnate, carry and birth babies for rich white people whilst being locked in facilities for 9 months?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/21 11:03 AM
3

Do you not like him to see your car so he can’t judge how much you earn or so he can’t track your license plate?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 12:40 PM
16

I had a similar situation a few years ago. I had a gut feeling he was emotionally avoidant and ended it. I wasn’t in love with him but I think I could have fallen in love if he had been more desperate to see me! When I ended it he sounded upset but then said, ‘I knew it would either work out with us or it wouldn’t’. 🤦🏼‍♀️ Also my LVX started out like this as he was long distance but I was in love with him so I said I wanted to see him more and he immediately started seeing me at least once durin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 09:43 PM
4

Does he call you every day on the phone? Are you falling in love with him?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 08:40 PM
141

This wouldn’t be so bad if all men asked out multiple women a day, then we’d get to choose between them as allegedly nature intended. Instead we only get leered at multiple times a day as they are too cowardly to ask us on a date and the one guy who asks out women and gets all the dates is the sociopath because his ego allows him to take the risk.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 11:28 PM
10

If he’s only texting between dates, would you tell him you prefer calls to texts and give him a chance, or just watch what he does naturally, and dump him if he never calls between dates (because it’s a red flag)?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 10:59 PM
43

Thanks for the post OP good to see it’s not just me this can happen to 🤦🏼‍♀️..so odd. I guess they’re on the hunt for a pickme who will sleep with them but don’t want to close us off as an option just in case. I have such low tolerance for low effort texts now that I don’t bother replying till the evening to skip all the good morning BS. Give me a real man who picks up the phone to genuinely get to know and connect with me. That dude is going to get very very very lucky as I am involuntarily cel…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 07:50 PM
43

..and the women’s greeting instead of ‘hello’ is ‘I’m here if you need to talk’ wheras the males just grunt at each other😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 07:25 PM
426

Being competent and healthy seems to be part of the redpill message already which men ignore because it takes effort. Instead they cling to manipulating and treating women with disrespect because it appeals to them. I think it gives their ego a boost when they successfully manipulate a woman. Also a dopamine boost. Like porn addiction they would need to stop the manipulative behaviour cold turkey for a few years to change the neural pathways of the reward system in their brains. Educating boys t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 12:54 PM
140

It’s because he partakes in threesomes. He is desperate for you and all of reddit to know he is experienced with threesomes which is why he keeps talking about his superior knowledge of boundaries (you can only have a threesome if these magical sex play boundaries are discussed in depth first apparently) and THIS is the woman’s biggest problem. As you, OP, don’t know about these magic sex play boundaries you are disqualified from giving advice 🤡 Pornsick scrote.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 09:38 PM
163

‘Try to understand his world of strain and pressure’. This article suggests that men gaslit their wives into believing work was incredibly hard and so they needed to be pampered when they came home. Now we are in the work place we see through this BS. Mutual pampering or gtfo 💅
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 09:20 PM
65

What about the manlet life-sized toy car behind him on the floor 😂 thought men were visual: choose your background better when you’re having a public tantrum BRO
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 01:23 PM
33

I knew a very NVM who did drugs behind his wife’s back and swore to his wife he wasn’t and this was his excuse phrase for lying: happy wife happy life! So watch out - scrotes take it and twist it to suit themselves
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 08:32 PM
316

Horseshoe-balding 💀💀
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 05:09 PM
76

Agree - 99.99999% of the problems in my life would have never happened if I’d stuck to my guns and not got back with a boyfriend when he started begging (aka gaslighting)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 02:27 PM
10

I have always been cheated on so I went for older guys for same reason. Figured they would have got their wild oat sowing days behind them and be so happy to have a young pretty woman. Still cheated.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 10:22 AM
192

Or when they’ve been asking questions all night so you’ve discussed your netball, cycling, book club, meeting friends, painting, child and work. THEN they say ‘So tell me about yourself how else do you spend your time?’ Dude! How much spare time do you think I have? You just know they’re going through their first date patter and not really listening to you. The OLD equivalent is when their second message is ‘So tell me about yourself what do you do for fun?’ and it is all in your profile. All th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 10:43 PM
11

Why do they accept? I can’t wrap my head around it
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 10:54 AM
6

💀yes! A haircut!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 04:20 PM
54

When I found out about my LVX husband’s clustercheating and told him I wanted a divorce he said, ‘It’s not like I’ve murdered anyone” 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 04:17 PM
24

Me too but I read somewhere on this sub advice that you should say “why would you say that?” when someone negs you. I have used this three times on three different men since and it works so well! They all back track and make up a reason for saying a comment that makes them not sound like a negging asshole! And they don’t then get what strange scrote satisfaction they were looking for to score a point over me. Love this sub 💛
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 03:56 PM
34

When I moved towns 5 years ago I fell in with two high drama high fun women but my boundaries were constantly being pushed and I recognise now that I had to drop my standards to be with them. Found out that one of the women had been clinically diagnosed as a sociopath and the other I’m sure was a narcissist. As soon as I suspected she was a narc I grey rocked it away from them both but honestly the gregarious loud attention-seeking substance abusing ones in the group often have personality disor…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 02:45 PM
23

That photo of him showing off his arm muscles - correct me if I’m wrong but doesn’t redpill/incel promise men they will get women if they get arm muscles and work out? Of course that doesn’t work if you are at the same time a manipulative sh*t towards women. Whatever sub he followed should take the blame for creating these types of men by spreading laughable ideologies. Men are afraid women will laugh at them but these types of men are actually hysterically sad.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 02:32 PM
21

This is a woman’s sub please stop commenting/lurking here
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/21 02:06 AM
328

In the context of dating - no I have never met one. And now that I’m not going to date someone who watches porn, (fds made me really think about this) I don’t think I ever will. But I’m still keeping my fingers crossed 🦄 🦄 🦄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/21 10:57 PM
20

I felt reluctant to share with my LVX my hurt about a sibling’s behaviour, but I didn’t know why. Eventually I confided in him and he made all the right soothing noises. Weeks later during an unrelated argument he brought the situation up ‘and I’m also very concerned about the way you talk about your sibling...’ so cruel and manipulative! I realise now that I held a lot back from him because he could flip his point of view and use it against me to win an unrelated argument. Deflection was his sp…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 10:47 PM
18

The shorts
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 03:51 PM
19

Or the I’m a nice guy version ‘wish you well in your search ☺️’. Here’s an idea, Paul, why not carry on being a nice guy to your target and you might end up in a fulfilling relationship with lots of sex?? But no, Paul fancies himself as a James Bond character with a harem of women around him. Maybe there are pickmes that do give him sex when he stops contact but they must be hard to come by. Or maybe there are loads of them. Would love to know the reality of these average men’s dating lives. Wha…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 01:40 PM
36

This. It’s like they’ve all bought the same $99 dollar internet course on how to manipulate women. As OP said: ‘He might have even gotten some piss poor advice from the manosphere and RP that told him to go no contact for a few days, so that you would miss him, get the perception that he’s someone of high value and subsequently run back to him and get into his bed.’ If you never initiate texts or calls from day one and only respond to them, you will not fall for this bullshit. Simply because if …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 12:44 PM
18

“I’m not a bad person but I do bad things sometimes”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/21 11:50 AM
172

It’s negging. For him to say that he saw how scared and nervous of him you are is impolite and meant to make you feel even more uncomfortable. The last OLD guy who said this to me (as soon as he met me on the first date) followed this up with lots of clumsy wannabe manipulative phrases and behaviour and it became clear through conversation that he thought of women as ‘other’ and a puzzle that needed to be cracked. The vast majority of men we meet through OLD have skewed views of women. I am also…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 12:22 PM
48

Yep - that story about the naked woman tiptoeing after the killer down the corridor while he goes to get a knife still haunts me. It did make his point more powerful to me though and I rely on my intuition about anything (not just men) much more after reading this book.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 10:04 AM
22

Why did he deactivate it? Or do you think he didn’t?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/21 10:22 PM
13

Perhaps estrogen in the water or just plain evolution, is turning us into a species of hermaphrodites, and like the seahorse, males will give birth to the young allowing women to have more time to run the world and do queen stuff. Hooray! And that is why males are gagging to be ‘chased’ by us, bless them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/21 09:49 PM
39

What I’m experiencing is a dinner invite, then they screw up by suggesting it in their town, between our towns or want me to plan the entire evening for them! So many blocked men and no dates for them just like this sad little dude. My finger is hovering over the OLD app delete button.. I’m nearly there..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/21 07:19 PM
27

Bet it’s not even a new cafe..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/21 07:12 PM
58

Let’s do this!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/21 09:32 AM
24

My LVX used to say I shouldn’t be mad at him because he’d had ‘good intentions’ - I thought I needed to teach him how to be a decent human being because he hadn’t got the memos but since we broke up I realise he was playing me all along with his dumb act.. 🤦🏼‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/21 12:00 AM
45

Saying a woman can’t teach a man to be a man supports the patriarchy. Is this a troll post..er...mods?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 02:37 PM
78

Have you noticed how angry (a controlled anger that tries to appear logical) guys get when they’re defending strip clubs? Very emotional. It’s because they know deep down it’s wrong and they are gaslighting themselves it is acceptable to go. The cognitive dissonance upsets them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 08:47 AM
89

‘Breath play’ - it’s murder experimentation ffs
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 08:38 AM
116

To find out his passcode play the long game. Memorise a few numbers at a time when you are able to watch him. Most shady scrotes will try to look innocent by putting the passcode in in front of you super fast rather than hiding the phone while they do it. Remember what you can, write it down and soon enough you’ll be able to put it together. If he has face recognition he will still have to use his passcode from time to time, e.g when it has been turned off or if you put a wrong code in a few tim…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 08:26 AM
49

My LVX gave me all these arguments and would read this sort of shite from other guys to ‘prove’ to himself and me that he was in the right and he was normal. Funnily enough his google searches didn’t produce results which said he was a sex crazed pig
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/21 10:27 AM
7

When I first kissed my LVX husband the world spun on its axis and I felt like I was being sucked through a swirling vortex! No exaggeration. This continued for a couple of years every time we kissed (hasn’t happened before or since with another guy like this with kissing). Our son is a strapping, tall, strong, boy who rarely gets colds or any other illlnesses so I think it was because our immune systems were super compatible i.e our offspring would be healthy so our bodies were extremely attract…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/21 10:21 AM
79

Gross 🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/21 09:32 AM
3

I know that calling people narcissists is said to be overused and ‘only professionals can diagnose it’ but I think there are a lot more people walking around with narcissistic personality disorder than has been previously thought. The number one trait is that they think they can do no wrong so they are never going to reach out for help via therapy. Also in therapy they are impossible to diagnose because they lie. Therefore how can the powers that be accurately report what percentage of the popul…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 08:58 PM
7

Nice one Savannah! 🏆
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/21 11:07 PM
31

It was raining and I had no brolly. Was a few feet from an ATM machine with my card in my hand when a man who was previously behind me on the street sprinted around me and pushed in front of me with no apology. He looked back at me, knew what he’d done but no apology. I don’t know if he was broke or what but he was looking at statements, kept trying the same card over and over, basically he was banking while I stood there waiting. I got soaked. All I needed was to take out a quick bit of cash.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/21 07:22 AM
124

Prob because it was an over reaction and there was no chance of house burning down just a bit of overcooked soup
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/21 12:46 PM
18

I suppose it gives the woman hope so she buys into everything else the coach says = £. Dating advice like that which is given here: ZERO TOLERANCE BLOCK is much harder to accept when you fancy the pants off a man and you want a relationship
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/21 09:35 AM
17

Yes! And we’re fed the belief that they’ve ‘gone into their caves’ or ‘they like you so much they’ve got to withdraw to process it’ or some BS wheras in reality they are consciously trying to manipulate you and will continue to do so in other ways throughout your relationship
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/21 09:32 AM
26

You’ve described my ex. ‘Abuse’ is such a loaded word that it was hard to accept or recognise my LVX abused me, because he had this sunshiney, happy, funny, sweet, loving persona most of the time. He was still trying it on during our last conversation when he was desperate to get me back: “I wouldn’t yell at you if you didn’t make me so angry”. I reckon he’d found a tecnique that worked to shift blame since childhood and he automatically used it to ‘win’ arguments. Many women are socialised to b…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/21 08:48 AM
3

He did it to emote being happy and upbeat about every little thing - you have similar reddit given name to me except yours is cooler. Mine sounds very corporate!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/21 08:33 PM
7

Gold diggers - it’s to ascertain if you have a decent income and money invested in property.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/21 04:40 PM
10

Does your source give the percentages for bumble and hinge?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/21 03:12 PM
17

Same! Also I dated a guy who used this emoji 🕺for everything. For some reason it gave me the creeps. Made me want to 🤮 🤮 🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/21 03:09 PM
20

I went on a date with a guy who worked in IT that said his wife divorced him because he used to work late every night and often wasn’t back till 10pm. They had two kids. He made out like he could see this wasn’t ideal and he had messed up. Then later in our conversation he said he was looking for someone who values ambition because his wife wasn’t ambitious enough to want a career. Dude! How could she have a career without abandoning the kids! He was lucky to have a wife to look after everything…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/21 02:58 PM
40

Obvs you’ve no way of knowing, but if you had to take a stab at what percentage of the guys are addicted to swiping, what would you guess at? I hadn’t thought about this aspect of apps and really there is no point in using them further if most of the men are addicted. You can’t compete with changed neural pathways and dopamine spikes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/21 10:05 PM
133

A guy we’ll call Anthony asked me during the vetting call if I owned my own place or was renting. His voice sort of ‘gentled’ when he asked. I thought it was an intrusive question in the context of our conversation. He asked me on our date how many premium bonds I owned (savings) when it wasn’t relevant. When he saw my car his mask slipped and his face sort of went ugly. My car is fine but it is 10 yrs old. I could buy a sporty fun newer car but I choose to spend money elsewhere and I’m carting …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/21 09:41 PM
168

Hurrr durrr you’re a KING
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/21 02:41 PM
8

Are you glad she did it? I kept quiet yesterday when I wanted to tell a man off (see my post above). Should I have said something? It might have made me feel better because I was so enraged. But, he was itching for a (verbal) fight and I didn’t want to give him one. Plus it might have made things worse for her. Also chances were she could rightly tell me to mind my own business. Plus I’m British 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 04:09 PM
25

In a queue yesterday @ a home store behind me a man was verbally abusing his wife in that disgusting underhand way of deflection, blocking, witholding, condensation, word salad, contempt all over a blind she was trying to get him to approve and collaborate on. I wanted to punch him in the nose and demand he apologise to his wife. He was so ugly compared to her: old, scraggly facial hair, pitted skin, gut and she wasn’t staying for his money if she was shopping at this bargain store! She was so p…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 04:01 PM
34

It’s so they can say ‘well you chose to stay so now you have to accept all my BS.’ They don’t expect you to leave it’s a gamble for them in case you do, but if you leave they think they can just grovel, say they’re a changed man, validate you and you will take them back. And after a few months of best behaviour they know they can just repeat all the same bad behaviour again. Ask me how I know.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 03:48 PM
183

☠️Not scared of puberty! LMAO
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/21 07:52 PM
201

Was having dinner at my LVX’s house, he said something that made my subconscious aware he was about to break yet another promise to me, so I stood up, grabbed my coat and ran out the house to my car. Strangely it wasn’t me running it was my body! When I got home I was bewildered by my reaction as I’m not normally that dramatic and had to work out what triggered it. We were together three years and that was the last time I saw him. Best decision ever. Always trust your legs!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/21 07:45 PM
102

It’s super sad if some bloke is paying for hotel porn when they’ve got free porn in their pocket on their mobile phone! I expect these chains are porn free because no one is buying it rather than because it is more ‘ethical’.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 12:46 PM
7

Ooh maybe...or to stop women having too many children - so they can protect and nuture better the ones they do have
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 10:18 AM
12

My ex called it ‘horny week’! I thought it was just my strange hormones - are most women like this? Thing is it makes no sense because we can’t get pregnant at that point in our cycle so why would mother nature do that to us!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 08:00 AM
8

Sorry you went through this. First of all, we’ve all been there, which is why we’ve gravitated towards this sub. Most of us are still a work in progress. I definitely am! We are all asking ourselves the same questions: how can I stop this happening again and why did I let it happen at all? You feel like your intuition has let you down but if you think back to all the red flags, your intuition was working just fine at the time - it was your mind that pushed the uneasiness (intuitive warning) away…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 09:16 PM
130

We are tiny voice droplets 💧in a sea of pickmes 🌊
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/21 09:09 PM
83

This article should NOT have been about shaming his wife. For those outside of the UK, this newspaper is the most sexist, bigoted, racist paper you can buy here. BBC Radio 1 reported that there was no suggestion that Wayne had done anything inappropriate and blamed the ‘blackmailers’. It is completely inappropriate for a married man to be hanging out with a bunch of young women. Both of these influential media outlets gave the man a free pass and blamed the women. Wtf.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/21 10:58 PM
13

It’s a generic copy paste question meaning they haven’t bothered reading your profile and often is asked by guys who don’t want to meet, just chat. I block delete because they never end up asking you out just waste your time getting female attention from anyone. Also similar is ‘how are you finding this app?’ ‘How’s it going on this app?’etc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/21 11:31 AM
4

There was no justification for Carlisle making any of them vampires - he should have let them die rather than giving them such a miserable existence, but he was lonely and wanted a group of prople to indoctrinate into his vegetarian ways
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/21 09:54 AM
3

See my paragraph above about my ex. He would act outraged that I didn’t trust him but: deflection, denial and telling you you shouldn’t feel the way you do - all these are emotionally abusive attacks to defend himself and manipulate you so he can keep on doing as he pleases.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/21 01:28 AM
7

“Look at his first actions before you schooled him on what you expected and liked. They will tell you who he really is. Everything after is him catering to your preferences for the time being but many low value men revert back. You wouldn’t have to teach a high value man these things at all.” This paragraph is pure gold. I had a very similar sounding ex with both the good and bad points (he even bought me a toy car 🤦🏼‍♀️). He always said things like ‘I’m just a friendly guy’ re. his female frien…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/21 01:15 AM
14

I read the books as an adult to see what all the fuss was about and I could not put them down or do any work until I’d finished all the books! I was shocked and have not experienced this before or since. I stayed up all night and read them all day without stopping and I cannot tell you why. I wonder now if it was because the stakes were so high - she could only be with Edward if she became a vampire and surely the author wouldn’t do that to the heroine - doh! Also I preferred Jacob so was maybe …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 07:07 PM
9

I thought it was a prosthetic! I had to rewind to be sure 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/21 09:25 PM
2

Genius - thx will be stabbing with one in my fist from now on!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/21 09:14 PM
5

You’re right. I wasn’t ok with any of it I was being a pickme. I knew he’d be so outraged and would accuse me of being insecure and not trusting him so I was trying to save face by being cool with him seeing them just not inviting them for dinner. Ho hum you live and learn. It was pre FDS. He was prone to..er..exploding fits of rage so I picked my battles. So validating to hear other women wouldn’t put up with this kind of thing tho, as people around me at the time accused me of being controllin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/21 09:09 PM
1

Thanks - the link didn’t open! Is it because they will grab them and use them on you?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/21 06:10 PM
14

I think that FDS encourages snooping to vet for porn before you’re in a relationship, as men will always lie about porn if they think you’re against it. I have never regretted snooping because I’ve always found something horrendous when my spidey senses have nudged me to snoop. I think finding something concrete helps with finishing with the man and having no regrets. It also stops them from being able to gaslight you and stops you from wondering if you were too harsh when you’ve seen evidence w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/21 04:11 PM
59

To all his exes, my XLVM texts them a picture of their favourite animal on their birthday. He had a little dinner and wine harem going until I told him I was gone because he continued to invite all his exes over for drunken dinners on rotation! One a week! Of course he said this was me being insecure - nope - this was me not willing to be with someone who needed validation and female energy from all these sources that weren’t his girlfriend! Plus getting so drunk with them in the room next to hi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/21 10:42 AM
294

Men should be grateful that any woman has deigned to be naked in bed with them. Instead they are repulsed. Well done for ruining sex, porn sickos.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/21 10:13 AM
25

“Maybe he has phone phobia” “Just go with the flow and don’t care about things so much” “That’s just men for you”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 10:16 PM
18

I parked my car next to my home and got out and this guy appeared and came towards me without saying anything or smiling but looking at me intently. I backed away but he kept coming. I put my keys between my fingers to make a knuckle duster, put my other hand out and shouted, ‘stop why are you coming so close to me stand back’. He said, ‘l’m your neighbour just came to say hello sorry if I startled you’ WTF read the room! He is my neighbour but if a woman is backing away, stop and announce your …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 06:14 PM
148

If he is divorced and admits to cheating in his first marriage, he’s telling you how much respect he has for marriage vows. Believe him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 12:47 PM
10

Or when they want an excuse to feed their drug addiction. Or when they want to pull...the dance thing would be a red flag in itself for me!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 11:18 AM
2

She looks like she’s been taken hostage by a guy wanted by the fashion police!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/21 09:42 PM
19

I agree the shit list works! Also: Think of him doing something ridiculous which is a turn off. E.g. every time I pined for my ex I imagined him poncing around at a party (which is how his ego loved to think of himself - “much loved party boy!” but I imagined him as the only person who was naked (beer gut included) and with a blue ribboned bow tied around his flacid dick (he was so proud of his average willy) puffing on a dummy instead of the joint he’d have hanging out of his mouth as he still …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 05:09 PM
5

Yes - thank you - he IS asking me to convince him and that is why it feels disrespectful. Cldn’t put my finger on why before. I blocked him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 11:24 AM
3

Thanks for replying - it felt dodgy & I wasn’t certain if it was worth persuing because of the back-pedalling but now I have blocked.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 11:22 AM
7

Help! Have LVM fatigue and no longer able to decipher if his last message is direspectful or not. Or too immature..favourite films.. (he’s a grown-ass man and texting not calling to find out about each other)??? Him: It’s done 💪🏼, have a swim for me 😁. Hey, would you like to meet up for a drink in X on Weds or Thurs evening ? Me: Yay well done! I don’t meet for drinks as a first date. You can ask me on a date though! Him: Do you live in X ? How about dinner ? Probably a good idea to find out a b…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 04:36 PM
80

‘I want a female. That’s whats the matter with me. But I don’t know how to do it’: said like every redpilled or LV scrote from the dawn of time. Er..Try being nice and make a consistent effort?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 10:14 AM
24

My LVX husband became depressed and ‘started’ watching disgusting porn to ‘help’ when I had a newborn. I made him go to counselling. He pretended the counselling made him all better. He lied.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 09:48 AM
18

This show is my Guilty with a capital G pleasure but I couldn’t get past episode 2 this year because Katie is such a pickmeisha! I know the show is encouraging this ‘sex positive’ character portrayal and laying it on thick with the editing but the cool girl vibes are just repulsive! I just can’t finish the season.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 09:36 AM
26

Yes it’s a constant need for validation from women to fill the bottomless vacuum in his self-esteem
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/21 04:55 PM
7

From now on I’m going to do what you do and mention on first dates that I prefer calls to texts and see what they do with that. If they don’t call I’ll just ditch them because..boundaries. I thought it was a good test as a sign of being emotionally stunted or being avoidant (according to Attached book it is) but I always have hope as we get to know each other they will graduate to the phone, they don’t, then I’m disappointed because they are either LYING about how much they like me and are spinn…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/21 10:31 AM
25

I agree. It’s such a turn off. Especially when it’s their means of communicating with you outside of dates. It gradually turns my interest off slowly like a tap until the 2 month mark when I’m too annoyed to text back at all. Grow some balls and pick up the phone and woo me! It also shows a lack of care about mate guarding. Texting guys tend to be very self-centred in my experience and actually aren’t that interested in your life outside of how it improves his. If they want to get to know you, t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/21 10:13 PM
8

Yes!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/21 03:52 PM
69

Yeah just more gaslighting - he’s not going to stop for anyone. They never do.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/21 11:52 AM
64

I recently read back my diary from when I was 12 and there were lots of references about vans beeping, gropey hands and men in their 20s at band practice giving me ‘massages’ and talking to me sexually. I remember it all happening but had to double check my age! I was extremely sheltered by my parents too so it could have been a lot worse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 11:50 PM
42

Yes! When 18 year olds send me a message on OLD, my stomach heaves with repulsion when I see their photo - eeew that’s just 8 years older than my son 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 11:42 PM
39

In my OLD profile I make zero mention that I have a child. This is to stop pedophiles from targeting my profile. But it’s important to mention before you meet for the first date IMO. Once we start texting it comes up naturally: ‘went cycling with my son today’ or if they ask me out quickly I make sure I mention it in passing in the vetting phone call. Don’t make a big deal of it though. In real life if a guy is chatting me up I don’t mention my son for the same reason, until they ask me on a dat…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 09:07 PM
23

Yes! I told my LVX that I divorced my husband because he cheated on me. My LVX would get gropey around strange women when drunk and was inappropriately flirty in general and if I pulled him up on it he accused me of being insecure ‘because of my past’. I feel so much rage thinking about the injustice of this even now! When a date asks why I divorced I just say ‘we wanted different things’ but if I ever get a boyfriend (😂😂) I will tell him that I divorced my husband because he was a compulsive li…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/21 01:54 PM
57

A first date scrote asked me if I was the jealous type and I said ‘only if a guy was being inappropriate around other women’ and he told me his ex would accuse him of looking at other women all the time. At that point I knew he had just told on himself. Then he literally told on himself later when he told me him and his best friend loved to ‘people watch’ and would sit somewhere together and give women marks out of 10 as their favourite thing to do 🤢I pointed out this was precisely the behaviour…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/21 09:39 AM
24

High engagement - love that
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/21 09:27 AM
17

And then because you’ve held out and not had sex with them for 3 months, their hormones have had long enough to make them genuinely fall in love with you and they go all googoogaga over you for a few years until their hormones flatten out then they look around for the next woman to get their peepee wet with but meanwhile they see the value of the relationship you’ve built together and decide to cheat on you rather than split up. Then because you are cleverer than them, you find out about the che…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 09:50 PM
25

Me too :(
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 09:18 PM
63

They get a commission if they shift some models when the shop is overstocked. I had similar odd experience buying a TV where he kept persuading me away from my choice but could give me no reason so I googled it afterwards. Also they are told to always upsale - even if a different brand is only £50 more expensive they have to recommend it. He was not trained to cheat on his girlfriend though. That was just natural scrotism.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 06:46 AM
127

Guys in their 40s/50s with their DJ set up on their kitchen table, ‘mixing’ in their OLD photos. Kitchen lighting bouncing off their bald heads. Hard nope. 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 08:56 AM
27

I’m so sorry you’ve been through this. What an A-hole to say he loves you then take it back. I’m trying to dodge a potentially similar bullet so need to ask - did he ever call you? I know you had to ask him to text you, but was he also calling you sometimes? I’ve been on five thoughtful, fun dates over five weeks with a decent bloke. He texts me once a day inbetween but he has never called me. If he wanted to he would. Ok. So I’m dating a guy who doesn’t want to call me. Am I being a pickme for …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 06:54 AM
15

Disgunting 😂 - perfect adjective for scrotes
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/21 11:27 PM
24

I think he was intimating that average men would lie that women were interested in them, and would brag about their success with women, even though they were under 5’10” and only earning 50k. He didn’t say that tho as his emotions kept choking him up so he was babbling. The presenter admitted that he was no longer making 6 figures..do you think he’s also under 5’10”? Might explain his panic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/21 11:24 PM
24

When we were all amoebas in the sea and reproduced by ourselves, evolution thought it a good idea for us to create a male, stronger ‘protecter’ amoeba and thus the male was formed. By us. Unfortunately because it was stronger it could bully the weaker amoeba and this is why we’ve been dominated by them, but when it comes down to it, females invented males! Facts! I told this to my LVX and he almost popped a blood vessel 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/21 10:44 PM
76

And in same breath he says ‘men have honor’ but if he brought an average man on his podcast ‘he would lie’..er lying is dishonourable last time I checked. Fresh and Fit is such a lame name. Sounds like a spanx advert.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/21 10:32 PM
41

Society says that watching sport on the telly IS doing something important. From a young age kids see their fathers making sport the centre of their lives and everyone around them in the family can go to hell/bring them snacks/keep quiet. The reality is that it is a fantastic excuse for the man to sit on his arse and do nothing for an hour and a half and feel self important while he is doing it. I cannot take men seriously who enjoy watching sport. Rant: my LVX husband knew this and did the bait…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/21 10:49 AM
26

Do you find the short scrotes always bring up their height on the first date like they’re pointing it out as a major flaw and had you noticed? It’s such a turn off because it reeks of insecurity. Insecure guys make me very wary. Plus of course I bloody noticed! 🤡I’m 5’4” and honestly not bothered by a guy’s height but bar none every short scrote cockblocks themselves. Now I automatically nope the guys on the apps below 5’10” and it’s their own fault!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/21 12:14 AM
35

Yay well done! I feel good tonight too. A guy who asked me out to dinner suggested we meet somewhere between us (would be 45 minute drive for me). Instead of explaining that I would only meet near my home on first date, I simply unmatched him as soon as he sent the message!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 08:04 PM
12

Thanks this is really good advice I can see that it would have worked for me in lots of negging situations. I tend to ignore their negative comment, pretend I didn’t hear it and keep the conversation moving but afterwards I feel down as I’ve been slightly disrespected and not stuck up for myself. Any semi decent scrote who was purposely negging would immediately be put on the back foot by this question and apologise. If they are a lost cause they would just dig a deeper hole for themselves. This…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 12:50 PM
471

Germaine Greer wrote in the 1970s: "Women have very little idea of how much men hate them." (Female Eunuch)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 12:04 PM
6

Just.........there are no words 😶
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 08:29 AM
35

LMAO: hire a sitter while the father is there! Mind you if I went away for the weekend my LVX husband would go and stay with his sister with our ONE very well behaved child..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 07:54 AM
219

The presenter’s final words: ‘A strong message not to judge anybody’ Title of the FDS post following this one: ‘Vetting men from the first encounter’ 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 12:19 PM
7

Podcast feedback: loving it don’t change a thing! I would love to hear an episode devoted to The Rules dating book. So many younger queens won’t have read it and it is FDS 101. There is also some pickmeisha stuff hidden in there which it would be good to weed out and discuss. This book got me 6 marriage proposals and guys who were crazy about me BUT the problem I had was I was doing the rules on LVM and didn’t vet properly or listen to my intuition. FDS and The Rules combined = sweet spot.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 09:17 AM
18

Guys who arrange the first date with you then keep on suggesting phone calls to chat before the first date. They’re trying to increase the chance that you will sleep with them on first date because you feel like you’ve already started dating them from their keen phone calls and false intimacy. They will ghost you after first date.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/21 10:31 PM
2

What does this mean? Interested as I’m dating a Taurus man. Thx!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/21 10:15 PM
103

I met the author of sex and the city, Candace Bushnell, and she said her real life love story she wrote the book about with Big, ends when he marries the other woman in her twenties. Anything after that in the series is just made up for TV. Goes to show that all of Carrie’s efforts to make LV Big into her husband were for nothing because once a using, abusive scrote always a using, abusive scrote.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 07:06 PM
39

Happy for you honey he sounds lovely. Thanks for such an encouraging, positive post💛
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/21 02:50 AM
27

I refused to do my ex husband’s laundry when we were together and some of my friends thought this was out of order! Ahem! I still ended up doing all my kid’s laundry, the bedding and towels. He also tried to put me in charge of towels. He had a lot of towel related questions he ran past me - which towel is best for the dog..where are the towels.. are these towels clean.. can I have a towel... which towel is mine.. I would just glare at him and say ‘dude I don’t care about towels why are you aski…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 10:41 PM
4

She made that comment about the drunk guy sounding ‘like every man on reddit’ when he joked about her being funny for a woman..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 10:26 PM
1

This. I bought so many psychology books while dating my ex 🤦🏼‍♀️trying to find the right way to explain to him how to be a decent human being. Gah! Tell you what though, I levelled up on how to spot and stop emotional abuse! Thanks scrote!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 09:21 AM
1

Had two 20 year olds do my house clearance for me yesterday and the only topics they talked about were women and booze. Their ‘banter’ was about this obsessively. They were unwitting alcohol addicts who’d bought into drinking culture and talked about women in an objectifying way only. One told me he’d nearly gone home with a girl the night before but at last minute her friend had intervened. I asked if he had her number he said yes but he wasn’t going to text or call her. I asked him why not and…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 09:03 AM
48

I touched up my shower with sealant and a make up brush. Took me 30 mins, cost £3 for the sealant and saved me the £150 the plumber quoted. When I suggested I could do it he hur hurred about it being a skilled job..ha!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/21 11:02 PM
25

Scrote
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/21 10:24 AM
16

😂 same! My LVX husband never ‘let’ me help put furniture together apart from standing around cheerleading, commiserating, listening to him moan and bringing cups of tea. When we split and I had to build all new furniture for myself I loved it! It’s so creative and fun! So easy! So quick! He ordered a desk for my son for my home this weekend, I knew so he could gain access to my home (I have a boundary where I normally don’t invite him in). He said it would be too heavy for me and too complicated…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/21 09:12 AM
10

This. If I need to finish a friendship that can’t be cut off without repercussions, I treat them like they have npd and grey rock them in text and irl if I see them. Be super boring, reply blandly to a text 12 hours later so there’s no instant gratification from texting you. Make out the pandemic has turned you into a hermit even if you’re doing loads of stuff and tell them you’re on a health kick and not drinking so they won’t invite you out!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/21 05:25 PM
92

Personally it annoys me because I imagine him sitting in bed with one hand down his pants copy and pasting it to every stranger he’s chatting to. The only thing worse is ‘good morning beautiful’ or ‘good morning how are you?’ With the question mark he’s wanting you to do emotional labour and entertain him with no effort on his part. It’s so weak and lily-livered. It oozes no imagination no personality wannabe charmer dickhead energy. It actually makes me scream into the void when a scrote has ta…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 09:34 AM
12

So it’s just more Machiavellian scrote mind games..lovely to be female and dating in 2021!
/r/askFDS19/06/21 06:06 PM
2

😎
/r/askFDS19/06/21 05:48 PM
6

I love this! Thanks!
/r/askFDS19/06/21 05:45 PM
6

Yes - I googled trip advisor and found a ton of cool restaurants I’d love to go to. Will block him.
/r/askFDS19/06/21 05:43 PM
3

So you say “I’m just not sure where to go” and leave it at that? Thanks - one to try for future scrotes.
/r/askFDS19/06/21 05:40 PM
16

Yes! So true - I felt flustered and mildly put out after this phone call and this is exactly why!
/r/askFDS19/06/21 05:36 PM
3

Ok - thanks - agreed - it’s low value & low effort.
/r/askFDS19/06/21 05:33 PM
11

I did google the most expensive restaurant and a famous posh British race course came up which made me laugh because it’s a bit like suggesting the Ritz! I would love to go there and I think he is the type that could afford it but you’re right he was off putting so I won’t go out with him.
/r/askFDS19/06/21 05:31 PM
4

Yes - he could be used to women doing the work for him so he sticks to that strategy
/r/askFDS19/06/21 05:25 PM
6

Your 2000 man sounds great - and such a turn on to plan all that for you! I was interested in adding this guy to my rotation as aside from the above he is good looking and personality type I go for but yes he was too abrasive. Thanks!
/r/askFDS19/06/21 05:21 PM
15

Ok - thanks - you’re right!
/r/askFDS19/06/21 05:14 PM
16

Ok - thanks for your response - I agree it was rude - gah!
/r/askFDS19/06/21 05:13 PM
19

Yes - this is why I felt disrespected after the call because he disregarded my opinion. I just didn’t think he’d been rude because I was trying to see it from his point of view but you’re totally right. Thank you!
/r/askFDS19/06/21 05:05 PM
15

So I meant that this is first LV trait he’s shown. Ok - thanks for your response ideas. These are good esp for future phone convos with future men. I’m keen to form a rotation but they keep cockblocking themselves so I only have a rotation of one man.
/r/askFDS19/06/21 04:53 PM
2

“You’re so insecure because of your past. I’m just a friendly guy” 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/06/21 10:22 AM
11

I recently sat next to a stranger at lunch (woman) and had such an enjoyable hour just shooting the shit and talking about anything and everything in a very feminine way and I realised afterwards that THIS is what men love. I felt so calm and fulfilled and heard and relaxed. She laughed at my gentle jokes, I laughed at hers..we helped each other by googling stuff to find solutions to questions that came up..we found common interests. There was no competition or trying to ‘look good’ - just gentl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/06/21 11:06 AM
37

🥱It will be a bunch of porn sick losers talking to bots & prostitutes. No women will go on it...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 10:24 PM
3

A ghost! LMAO 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/06/21 03:37 AM
14

LMAO I read and reread Georgette Heyer (Regency Romance) from age 9+ onwards and my idealised type is definitely sophisticated, preferably older, gentlemanly, posh scrote who dotes on me. To win my heart he happily changes his ways....😂thank you for writing this post - given me some stuff to think about!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/06/21 12:38 AM
3

The first year is the best! Everyone is new and needs to make friends so it is one big social paaaarty! You have so much in common with people on the same course as you and there will be loads of clubs and societies to join. Stay in halls of residence if you can - everyone there will be new and you will make instant friends. Loved my university years. I have kept in touch only with tons of uni friends (not school friends) because I chose them. School friends are simply friends because you happen…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 06:05 PM
11

Unfortunately I take the view that men like this bus pervert are mentally ill and if I shamed him he could punch me or beat me up to shut me up. I have had many experiences like this living in London - often on the tube - I know that nobody would come to my aid if a lunatic started beating me up🙁safest to move away and report the incident if it’s in a place with cameras
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 05:53 PM
13

Hope your boyfriend turns out to be a keeper - got my fingers crossed for you!🤞
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/21 06:13 PM
1

FDS introduced me to the concept of only accepting lunch and dinner dates. I could see the sense in it as this could help filter out guys who are just after sex and don’t necessarily fancy my ‘look’ but will try and shag anyone for as little outlay as possible. But I was dubious that I could get dinner dates because OLD men always suggest coffee or drinks or some ‘activity’ they’re into (or walks but immediate block if they do). I started to enjoy the challenge of negotiating up to lunch or dinn…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/21 05:55 PM
2

I had chronic pain in my left shoulder by my neck. I went on holiday with my sister and it suddenly eased. Every time I was on the phone to the LVX I felt a shooting pain again. He was literally a pain in the neck!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/21 03:42 PM
5

Also the figure given for the percentage of a population being narcissistic is 10% but this has got to be plucked from nowhere. I think it is much, much higher. NPD is said to be impossible to treat because narcissists don’t believe anything is wrong with them. Ergo imagine how many narcissistic men are walking around having never sought out any therapy, so there can never be any way of officially recording their numbers. So much of the behaviour we have all experienced sounds personality disord…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/21 03:33 PM
24

When I read something disgusting like this I feel a surge of anger then I feel a wave of helplessness. This is an extreme example of what every man has said to me about porn. They wldn’t have dared to be so rude but this was all implied. I want to see it now as gaslighting but they all appear to believe that what this scrote is saying is fact. Can it be gaslighting if they believe that porn is actually acceptable and every woman has to suck it up?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/21 12:24 PM
5

Thank you so much I’ll take a look. Really appreciate your help with this 🍰💛
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/21 06:37 PM
10

Can you point me towards a website/book that has the studies about any amount of alcohol being toxic for you please? I haven’t drunk alcohol for 2 years, but recently I’ve been considering having the odd glass again but keeping it to a minimum. I’m in two minds so would really appreciate some data.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/21 12:03 PM
61

Nothing wrong with you it’s just being human. Your attachment system hasn’t got the memo yet. Every time your brain prompts you to make contact, notice the urge and say, ‘that’s my attachment system’ then say ‘I accept this urge to reach out’ and then your attachment system will stop because it has done its job. Sounds bonkers! Stay strong.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 03:08 PM
4

You have to master a poker face that’s for sure. Esp. during covid lockdowns when they were inviting random strangers into their homes for first dates and sleeping with them and they were gutted when they never heard from them again! So much danger: covid/spreading covid/breaking the law/rape/murder/STDs/heartache!! I’ve learnt to bite my tongue.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 09:11 PM
29

😂bad for my ego, good for my soul
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 08:54 PM
27

I currently have a no kissing on first date rule because...covid. Used to always touch lips if I was feeling it and then be asked out again almost 100% of time, but now I’m not kissing, I am not always being chased for a second date. Not sure if this is a positive or a negative.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 08:20 PM
4

Thanks - yes and if they wait till 2nd date to shag, it is normally for a logistical reason like they have met the man halfway between where they both live for the first date so no bed handy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 07:31 PM
2

Good to know
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 07:27 PM
3

Thanks for the articles. 😂Dick and dinner! This would be such a great mindset to have in 2021 scrote-dating if I could stomach it. My friends are all looking for relationships.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 07:26 PM
15

I have only pickmeisha single friends who sleep with every guy they ‘match’ with on the first date or if they meet them out in a bar they will shag them the same night. Is this normal? Is this typical of men’s experience? For reference my friends span 20s/30s and 40s age groups. I have one friend who is cautious but she has psychological hangups around sex. Then there’s me who makes men wait for months before I sleep with them. My friends think I’m crazy. Do you think it’s as high as 50-100% of …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 01:50 PM
51

Yes 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/21 04:43 PM
15

Thank you for reminding me of this
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/21 04:29 PM
14

‘I had good intentions’ 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/21 10:21 AM
2

I say ‘what’s your point’ when they’ve finished. This annoys them. If they gamely repeat or try and explain again, once they’ve finished I say, ‘yes, but what’s your point’😁...and so on..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/21 11:13 PM
29

He kept gaslighting Heidi by saying ‘we could have such a perfect relationship if you stopped calling me out on my bad behaviour. It’s all your fault our relationship isn’t working’ 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/21 08:23 PM
3

YES! I watched this last night and had to fast forward through all that bullshit - I suddenly felt angry and didn’t realise why untill you just articulated it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/21 04:34 PM
3

He was..drugs & porn 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/21 03:34 PM
2

Yes! Thank you! Good workaround - I’m not with that guy anymore but will save this in case I’m ‘lucky’ enough to ever have another boyfriend 😘
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/21 03:34 PM
2

Once a month - yikes. Hmm..I would love to take Wonder Woman’s lasso of truth out on dates with me! It would clear up so many questions!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/21 03:31 PM
12

Thank you for doing this for us 💛
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/21 02:31 PM
2

Do you think that could be a reason for not asking women on a second date? Because they’re confirmed bachelors and go around taking different women out for one dinner with no intention of seeing them again? I’ve had a run of first dates with older men - 40s and 50s - where I’m younger and out of their league lookswise - fun first dates (I haven’t kissed them at the end tho which I wondered could be a factor) then they slow fade or ghost. So demoralising. I would have gone on a second date with t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/21 11:15 PM
5

Do you guys get a racing heart when you snoop? I hate it. Also my LVX said he wldn’t give me access to his phone because I cld then access his bank accounts and that would be irresponsible. With his passcode I could transfer money from his banking app. Any ideas for a comeback to this? It’s actually a valid point if you’re not married to your man or you’re a new couple. Damn their scrote logic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/21 02:18 PM
2

I’m so sorry you went through all that I’m gobsmacked and appalled. There are no words. I want to only go out with a man who will show me his phone and computer from now on but need advice - at what stage in a relationship do you ask to have access to their phone and computer and how do you ask? If they are going to refuse I’d rather know before I sleep with them. Also it would be prudent to check their phone before they agree to transparency then delete all the dodgy stuff. I was thinking of sa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/21 01:45 PM
4

Or they go to them if they’ve got some disgusting kink that they are too ashamed to reveal to you
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/21 01:11 PM
31

Sorry you went through all that especially while you were pregnant - pathetic d*ckhead tosser
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/21 11:30 AM
8

Yup - it will need to be a book, not card at this rate
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/21 11:18 AM
19

Bet he had one tandem parachute jump experience on holiday in 2010 and hasn’t stopped boring everyone about it ever since 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/21 12:38 AM
24

😂😘💛
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/21 12:25 AM
74

I went on date last night with a LVM (first date) and he could have filled out an FDS bingo card. Seriously, we should have FDS sponsored red dabbers and fill out the cards when we get home with a prize for the most full card and most traumatised queen. 1) called women ‘females’ 2) told me he and his best mate constantly ‘people watch’ women by giving them scores out of 10 and comparing notes 3) went on about his ’crazy ex’ 4) told me she was always jealous and accusing him of eyeing up women (s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 11:50 PM
1

Good to know - I’ve tended to fall for very charming LV guys and even they don’t do it even though they pride themselves on being ‘gentlemen’
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 12:12 PM
1

Not just me then!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 12:09 PM
1

💛Queen move!👑
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 12:08 PM
5

Not sure about the car door opening. Has anyone ever had this behaviour consistently from a boyfriend? Don’t get me wrong, I’d love it and find it very respectful (and sexy!) but in the UK the blokes just don’t do this...or do they? Any UK ladies experienced this?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 05:50 PM
1

It feels really good to hear that. All my friends think it’s really bad to snoop and obvs my LVXs have been outraged if I was caught. I also hate doing it, but it’s because experience has taught me that I will find something horrible on their phone! If you went out with someone who you trusted, would you look, even if you had zero suspicion of nefarious behaviour and they were HVM? I think I would for self preservation purposes :(
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 05:33 PM
25

I’ve always had a snooping policy when my intuition tells me something is up. I’ve always found something so although my heart beats really fast and I hate the physical snooping because it is so stressful (normally needs to be done quickly when they’re in the shower or something) I have never regretted doing it. I’ve always discovered lying/cheating/disrespect which I would have been ignorant of otherwise. I don’t tell them I’ve snooped just dump them or bring the issue up some other way. The on…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 01:49 PM
97

My LVX’s dating profile: ‘never smokes’ - yeah mate, apart from the weed you smoke every day come rain or shine. Literally every day. Also ‘into all kinds of artsy stuff’ - he never does, reads, watches or visits anything that cld be remotely considered ‘artsy’ unless he’s talking about the nude photos of himself he once sent me. Lastly: ’into clubbing’ again he never once set foot into a club or expressed a desire to the whole 3 years we were together. And they haven’t opened up again since cov…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 10:05 AM
6

This would be awesome 💛
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/05/21 02:26 PM
102

Thanks sis - yes blocked him
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 11:38 PM
164

I was on a first date last week and the bloke brought up something about Rod Stewart, so conversationally I said, ‘I’ve met Rod Stewart.’ He immediately said nastily, ‘Oh here we go, one of many people you’ve met I expect,’ and rolled his eyes. Actually, yes because of a previous career, but this was the first time I’d mentioned anyone to him. Made me feel small 😕. Thanks to FDS the word ‘neg’ popped into my brain.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 11:22 PM
21

I start very cautiously with new relationships and then when I feel cogitive dissonance and see their manipulations I call them out on it instantly and dump them if they don’t meet my values. They then pretend that they have seen the light, give lame excuses, apologise profusely. I sweetly forgive, take them back and after a short period of time they repeat the same disgusting behaviour, I call them out on it, they apologise, I forgive.....gah!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 03:33 PM
15

All my exes treated me, bought me flowers regularly and paid for trips abroad BUT they all cheated on me eventually or turned out to be LV in other ways. Sigh. Here is how you do it: make them wait for sex (about 3 mths!). If they don’t bring you flowers or treat you before sex they never will so you should just move on. Also light up the first time they bring you flowers and tell them it’s a turn on! Refuse to go on holiday with your boyfriend unless he’s offered to pay for it. Just say you can…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 12:02 PM
10

So when he argues with you he denies, gaslights, word salads and deflects. These are all emotionally abusive manipulative tactics to get power over you. Also bumbling male. I’m so sorry you’re going through this it is so confusing and hurtful when they lie that they don’t understand what they’re doing when they know exactly what they’re doing. My LVX was the same and it took me a long time to realise I was in an emotionally abusive relationship because outside of our arguments he was as sweet as…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 12:07 PM
71

There is a chemical explanation about why this happens and how to counteract it in Men chase women choose by Dawn Masler (FDS approved reading). From what I remember (it was an audiobook so can’t reference!) as soon as they come, their bonding hormone that has been building up as they get to know you, drops right back down to the original level. Ours remains high. However, if you don’t sleep with them for a few months (she suggests 3 minimum) their bonding hormone has time to build and build to …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 11:42 AM
8

My son had the bottle - he has always been the strongest, tallest, healthiest kid in his peer group. He’s 10 and can pick me up. He rarely even gets a cold.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 09:19 AM
-12

As soon as she walks out the door it’ll smudge
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 04:38 PM
25

Say ‘what’s your point?’ a few times and it drives them INSANE 😇
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 04:35 PM
159

This is why I dread asking divorced guys why they split because if they say they broke their marriage vows.. buh bye boy
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 04:03 PM
22

Men who discovered something that suddenly made them part of what they thought of as the ‘cool crowd’ when they were kids and have clung to it ever since because they still think it’s cool now they’re middle aged, and has come to define them e.g. binge drinking, weed, doing hard drugs - all from the comfort of their sofa. My LVX who had barely travelled anywhere or done anything told me he thought he was adventurous and a risk taker - yeah lots of adventures on your sofa mate
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 12:22 PM
30

Is that the book where she tells you to calmly hold your hand up and say ‘stop’ when they start on the word salad and deflecting? This technique really worked on my LVX when he was about to launch into a tirade of nonesense.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 10:57 AM
227

Huh! He basically datecatfished you for date #2 - how embarrassing for him to have to explain it to your friends. Would love to hear his version of this great date
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/21 07:56 PM
17

I would do the same thing to get my LVlazyassedX to help like ‘aw shucks how can I mend/make this? I tried googling it but it looks too complicated for me/it’s so heavy and I’m just a girl..’ and then he would step up, and I’d praise him and tell him how clever he was, but I just lost more and more respect for him because I wanted him to step up without the manipulation (he never did). Now I wonder if men lose respect for us over time when we keep swallowing their manipulation of acting dumb..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 02:11 PM
101

I get the ignoring request for a screener call a lot. In fact they will ghost me rather than chat on the phone even though they apparently want to spend a few hours face to face in my company. Any ideas why they are so against a pre-date call? It baffles me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 01:08 AM
2

I wasn’t a pickme, but I did give a short, bald, ugly man a shot, partly because somewhere in the back of my mind I thought he ought to be loyal. Spoiler alert: he wasn’t loyal. And he thought he was hot.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 09:50 PM
12

😂..more likely that they’ve all got tiny balls and they think I’ll sleep with them because I’m advertising my wares
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 08:00 AM
22

I moved to a village and got to know a large group of people through the local pub. None of the single guys asked me out or flirted with me. They all knew I was single. After a few years of being single, my friend encouraged me to try match.com. Nearly every guy I’d met from that pub contacted me through match and asked me out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 12:14 AM
1

They could type 3 letters into google and get free nudes 🥴
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 10:00 PM
1

Why do you think they aren’t desperately chasing the real women they do match with, and treating them really well, if the majority of their matches are bots and prostitutes?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 07:11 PM
30

My LVX always walked behind me. Two years in, I realised that this enabled him to eye up / make eye contact with random women while out with me 🤢. Disgusting, disrespectful habit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 04:25 PM
5

🏆💛
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 04:16 PM
1

Very astute. You have put into words just what I have been dwelling morosely on the past few days. I’ve got hard to get down to an art form because it works to allow them to fall in love with you but I still end up with scrotes. Don’t suppose you have any solutions..?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 01:35 PM
182

And vape themselves into a weed coma every night
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 04:26 PM
53

But..aw..every man? Bubble bursts💥..even the unicorn man?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 04:47 AM
30

Same - I think I’ve always confused my attachment system screaming at me to ‘watch out’ for attraction! Been reading about attachment theory this year and penny has dropped. Recently a guy I was just getting to know was showing me hot and cold behaviours and testing my boundaries. I didn’t know him enough to be into him but I felt so anxious all the time. Started thinking it was because I had fallen for him then slapped myself (gently!) As soon as I blocked/deleted him, my anxiety evaporated ove…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 04:25 PM
24

I’m in the UK and have only just started dating again since outdoor spaces opened up and like you, have found 99% of men ask me on walk/coffee/drinks. It’s not an easy negotiation to have over text with strangers. However I’m determined to find a unicorn and give men benefit of doubt because like you say all are totally accepted first date options here and some girls would actually turn down a dinner suggestion. I’ve tried upgrading walks by saying ‘would prefer lunch’ but they suggest coffee. T…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 12:24 PM
2

Same. He would always abandon me at his friends’ gatherings. After I explained to him why this annoyed me he told me I was wrong to feel upset but then would make an effort to check in with me occasionally at parties (with gritted teeth) then as he got more drunk through the night he’d forget and I would end up abandoned. I believe he got so much supply from ‘making’ strangers like him that new people were like catnip to him. Especially new women🤢I can hear him now mansplain to me “I’m just a fr…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 09:43 PM
64

Same used to believe it was attraction! And now when I block/delete my anxiety disappears like my whole body is breathing a sigh of relief
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 05:35 PM
432

Notice how the scrotey train guard in high viz just stands by and watches them kick young girls. If he’s a coward - at least he should call for back up. He should get the sack. They were running towards him for help
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 03:04 PM
1

I went on a walk date (purely covid exception!!) with a LVM who moved his whole head neck and body to gawp at every young girl that passed us. In this sense the walk date was a great LVM filter as I might not have found out about this lovely habit until after a few restaurant dates.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 12:18 AM
1

Normally (pre covid) if I fancy a guy on a first date, I make a point of touching him non sexually a few times. Not even flirty, just random thighs touching, a hug when you meet or say goodbye, a pat on his arm if he makes me laugh. I do it so I get asked out again - not for these rapey incel reasons, but it is a deliberate strategy. As I’m not very ‘sexy’ naturally with strangers, I found that a date could be fun, we’d have loads in common but I wouldn’t be asked out again. If however I do the …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 11:10 PM
1

Same. I had a first date last week with a guy that seemed like a gentleman, and when he approached me to greet me I offered my elbow because I’d only been vaccinated a week thereby signalling my desire to have some distance because...covid! At end of lunch as I stood to go, he jumped up and grabbed me around the waist and squeezed me into his body.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 10:39 PM
401

And it wasn’t their fault they gave birth to daughters because sperm dictates the sex of the fertilized egg. Of course the women got blamed for that too..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 11:25 PM
18

I’m no expert but here’s what I’m trying: if they suggest coffee I say I’d prefer a phone call. My reasoning is that they are suggesting coffee as a pre-screen plus I would not meet anyone without talking on the phone first anyway. My intention is that once we have got to ‘know’ each other slightly through chat, they should be willing to invest in lunch with me. I would say ‘lunch is best for me’ if they suggest coffee again. So far though two things are happening: 1) they arrange a time for a c…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 05:55 PM
11

Can I come?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 04:05 PM
15

I would put my hand up and say ‘stop’ ✋when he started word salad - think that tip was from lundy bancroft - he would look surprised then stop talking!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 09:58 PM
99

I was upset had (sad) tears in my eyes and LVX said, ‘OMG you’re so cute’. I always thought it was odd but now the penny drops
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 09:43 PM
1

Just seen my LVX’s profile on Bumble. 70% lies! Including ‘never smokes’ er dude, you smoke weed every evening and ‘socially drinks’ - yes - if by social you mean every evening while you play video games socialising with yourself. Also given himself an extra inch in height.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 12:37 PM
9

Yes how true! Having to constantly explain to my LVX what and why my standards were, with him then gaslighting me back, was such a source of pain. Now I’m certain he was pretending to be a ‘bumbling male’ and knew what he was doing - ugh
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 09:46 AM
39

Mother’s day when I lived with my ex and son: I booked lunch somewhere and received a cheap supermarket plant (I love cut flowers, not a fan of plants - regardless of whether that is logical, my husband knew this). My husband is grumpy as usual all day. Mother’s day now I live with my son: son orders a card and a surprise from my awesome Amazon wish list (on my stored bank card and with a budget!), he brings me breakfast in bed, makes lunch and we eat out somewhere nice. My son is fun, excited a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 09:39 PM
36

You’re so controlling (when you ask them to stop their abusive behaviour or stop hurting you in some way) You’re damaged and paranoid because of your past (when you’ve confided in them about behaviour a previous ex upset you with and they do exactly the same to you and you call them out on it) I’m just a friendly guy and you can’t handle that (when they get drunk and have their hands all over strange women in front of you or you hear them flirting with said women)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 08:46 PM
1

Do you find that the guys that write the elaborate long texts are the ones that are more likely to never ask you on a date..or is that just me ?🤦🏼‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 10:40 AM
2

Good point
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 10:29 AM
33

My LVX told me that all guys think about sex 24/7 and all guys watch porn and all guys walk around looking at every woman in a sexual way and all guys eye up every woman that cross their path and all guys are lying to me if they deny any of the above. He had ADHD and when he started taking medication and his brain adjusted to how a more neurotypical man would think he was (pleasantly) surprised that he didn’t have sex on the brain constantly anymore. Before the pills he was constantly fighting t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 08:58 AM
2

😂it’s because he’s a gaslighting asshole
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 08:38 AM
1

Tosser! My LVX would get annoyed when I got loads of quotes for stuff to be done on the house instead of going with the first one he picked but I saved us x50% more every time!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 08:32 AM
3

When they ask for my number to ‘chat off the app’ I pretend that I think they are asking to talk to me on my phone (with their voice) then suggest we schedule a time to chat on the phone in the app. They then go a bit quiet, then they suggest a time (normally a few days in the future they are suddenly very busy) for a chat and I never hear from them again. I know that if I gave them my number they’d just whatsapp me wanky ‘morning’ and low effort ’how are you’ texts for weeks and never ask me on…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 01:27 AM
6

😂loser fuckboy! I have one named ‘gashole’
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 01:05 AM
5

Same. I really struggle blocking the handsome, successful men especially when a date has gone well and I fancy them, but I am doing it at the first red flag too! We are queening it🏆👑🥇
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 01:02 AM
6

Because of FDS when they suggest meeting I ask for quick phone chat first, they then agree day/time for chat and 99% of them ghost me! I now don’t expect them to call at all at the agreed time so if they do it is a nice surprise! So odd. I get that it’s awkward speaking to a complete stranger but isn’t it more awkward meeting a complete stranger in person on the actual date?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 12:55 AM
5

Yep same - I’m now learning to side with my gut. I still go through all the ‘detective thoughts’ which I guess is my ego but I am then daring myself to side with my gut. My body feels a lot better when I do and press block/delete. I may never have another relationship because I’m deleting everyone but at least if I do he will be emotionally healthy for me 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 12:46 AM
25

I just pointed out to a guy I matched with that he lives 1hr 1/2 away from me and he replied, ‘yes probably a non starter but it’s good to have contact with people and friendships are possible on here too’. I’ve come to realise that 90% of the guys that chat to us have no intention of ever asking out anyone, even if we look and sound like their perfect woman, so it’s not personal just annoying. What’s sad is this guy’s idea of a friendship. I guess they are using us for our female energy and whe…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 12:02 AM
13

Yes and it really hurts but the uncertainty makes it worse. The attachment system starts buzzing when there is a hint and it’s hard to concentrate on anything else until it’s resolved
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 11:47 PM
3

Sometimes my intuition suggests it’s because they are trying to set up dates with other women around mine on the same day (before or after), so they are juggling locations and times and can’t confirm with me until they have all their ducks in a row. Which would correlate with your theory. Bit desperate and sad really. Hard to take any of them seriously
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 10:18 PM
15

Honest question: in handbook it suggests asking in a friendly way ‘how much porn do you watch’ or ‘what type of porn do you watch’ to find out if they watch porn. I plan on asking this in the future and think it is good advice. However, since all guys are going to answer that they watch porn to some degree, should we be dumping them at that point? This is not a question I would ask on first few dates so it would come up after I’d got to know and like them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 10:43 AM
56

And eventually it escalates to them seeking out sex workers or online anonymous perverts to act out their fantasies and you’re cheated on physically as well as mentally
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 10:35 AM
2

Would recommend reading Attached by Heller and Levine for behaviour to look out for
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 10:19 AM
33

I have sworn to myself that I will NEVER again date an avoidant so I have spreadsheets to weed out avoidant men! I go through the questions in the book ‘attached’ that you answer to work out your mate’s attachment style, and save answers on my laptop. Over time with more information to input I should see a bias to acting one way or the other. The author gives clear scores to indicate what type they are depending on points. And they say ‘females aren’t loGiCal’
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 10:05 AM
21

OMG I want one - it’s gorgeous! 😘
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 10:59 PM
10

Yes I wondered about this but crikey it’s so Machiavallian. Seems like every bloke on OLD who asks me out has dark triad traits and is planning his every calculated move while cackling ‘mwahahaha - take that female
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 08:27 PM
5

Moving forward I’ll do this too.😂Will mean I’ll never go on any dates tho. Esp with my other new rule of rejecting all walk/coffee/drinks dates!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 08:16 PM
5

Thx - it’s not decent you’re right. Disappointing tho.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 08:12 PM
4

Sadly that actually makes the most sense
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 08:02 PM
2

😂 Lord works in mysterious ways. I think he wants us in the scrotes’ lives to help them out. My ex scrote has levelled up x 100000000 thanks to me and he has admitted that himself! You’re welcome God but can’t I have a HVM as a reward now pl?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 07:56 PM
3

Never liked baldies, but I now give them a second glance because if they lost their hair in their twenties, it can be a sign of high testosterone, which can mean he has a big dick. According to an FDS post, baldness can also be caused by too much masturbation tho which could be triggered by high testosterone. My ex was bald, had a big dick, was told he had high testosterone (by docs), a high sex drive and was porn sick. Jurie’s out. Chicken or egg...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 02:44 AM
10

🤣 wonky willy
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 02:10 AM
22

Do you think they’re trying to blow hot & cold like a PUA tactic? Or trying to play it cool? Or just frightened little boys all nervous about the date with a new woman? I get this a lot. They set up a day & time for a date, ghost for 3 days (having never missed a day to txt crappy ‘good morning’ txts since we first matched) then call/txt a few hours before we’re meant to be on the date with a venue idea. Meanwhile I have no idea if they are going to ghost me completely & no idea where I’m going …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 02:06 AM
22

😂😂 I heard that same BOOMING voice tell me ‘Don’t marry him,’ when I was cleaning my kitchen at the same time asking God about staying with my ex. I didn’t marry him but always wondered if the voice was my intuition or God himself!!! Re. OP’s question: he lasted 3 years but with FDS knowledge he wldn’t have lasted past the first date with some of the stories he told about himself...all showed his character to be low value which turned out to be correct
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 01:41 AM
2

Thank you for writing this post 💐
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 08:51 PM
4

Have you considered that the men that trigger your anxiety are doing it because they are showing micro bad behaviour that your attachment system is picking up on? And warning you about? E.g. they are slightly disrespectful in some small way (tiny neg or making a ‘joke’ that’s at your expense) or they take longer to confirm the details of the date than they should (hot/cold PUA tactic or signs of an avoidant personality). I find I give men who come across as HV in some ways (they are from similar…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 07:53 PM
9

Proud of you too. Should have trusted my gut and called off my wedding. I’m divorced now (and share custody of child) from a porn sick unfathful loser that I would never have married if I’d known how to listen to myself. You are standing up for you. You know how to listen to yourself and that is a huge skill that needs to be learned and is worth celebrating! Well done honey.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 04:21 PM
34

My cheapskate ex would take me out to restaurants, pay the bill by card and ask me if I could pay the tip because he didn’t have any cash and he wanted it to ‘go to the waitress not the restaurant’. This happened every damn time and always made me feel ick. I felt disappointed because it seemed like a power move to get me to contribute (at least that’s what my intuition told me) and after a while was like he cared more for a waitress than how uncomfortable he made his ‘cherished’ girlfriend feel…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/21 10:09 AM
37

This. And shop assistants - he’d hold up the queue chatting away, laughing like they were comediennes or best friends. He had narc traits and once admitted he always studied strangers and needed to work out how to ‘make’ them like him. To be fair he was embarrassingly friendly to both strange men and women but it was inappropriate and disrespectful when it was women. He’d give me this ‘I’m just a friendly guy’ shtick when he was over-friendly or handsy with women (strangers) in front of me. God …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/21 08:55 AM
12

Same & that’s when I’m logged in
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/21 08:14 AM
15

Yup to all the above plus using manipulations disguised as charm that I completely see through now...’morning’ or ‘nite’ texts that they’re copying & pasting to lots of women at the same time..gushing about how beautiful I am before even meeting me irl..one guy pointed out how cute a baby was at another table and I immediately thought ‘he’s trying to manipulate me by making out he’s the type of guy who likes babies’ - I’m sure my intuition was right on that one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/04/21 03:26 PM
22

I bought a 6 ft soft fluffy rug and its rolled up in my living room propped against the wall still, because when I hug it I feel oxytocin flood my body! Kinda sad.. but it never gaslights me!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/04/21 03:15 PM
14

Apparently meditation even for a few minutes a day, over a period of months reduces the size of the amygdala which reduces the amount of anxiety we experience. Source: men chase, women choose - fds recommended book
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/04/21 10:45 PM
3

My ex scrote had a mouse infestation because he refused to buy commercial mouse traps/poison. He invented his own traps (water bottles that collapse or precarious buckets) because he enjoyed the ‘intellectual challenge’ of trying to outwit them. I was bitten by fleas flying out of the carpet at one point (presumably they lived on the mice). Everybody knows you never ignore mice because they multiply at an alarming rate. He was 46. It was one of the very last straws for me. He was trying to persu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/04/21 10:51 PM
2

😂agreed. It’s a big island with lots of people living on it, but he’s probably offered boat rides to all of them already and now working his way through the mainland.
/r/askFDS19/04/21 01:13 AM
8

Dawn Masler (men chase, women choose author)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/04/21 11:11 PM
3

True - it’s better to think of it as a learning curve - hopefully my intuition will kick in sooner next time & flag a future faker
/r/askFDS16/04/21 08:55 PM
5

Yes all good points but esp. re. not considering safety. I thought he suggested it because I’ve talked to him about my boating history & how I miss it, but even if that was the case he shld have given me an alternative safe option if he was considering me at all. He’s a mildly famous sportsman so I guess lots of women jump into his boat and he expects that to be all the effort he needs to make. NB the Saturday date to meet had been agreed on Monday - it took him a few days to come up with paddle…
/r/askFDS16/04/21 08:47 PM
-1

What do they get out of future faking do you think? And do they feel any guilt about doing it? I can think of reasons why they wld do it e.g. look much older than their pics or dating other girls and can’t fit me in, but seems like a lot of effort and no reward - just results in women being annoyed with them. Or maybe that’s the point :)
/r/askFDS16/04/21 08:26 PM
2

It’s 40 min boat ride. He also talked about option of taking ferry and driving extra hour round trip so he had a car instead and we had more options but he has since gone quiet for 2 days and date is meant to be tomorrow. I guess I shld give him till tonight to plan a good date and cOmUnicAte it to me before chalking him up to another waste of my time. He’s been phoning/txting for about 3 weeks. What is wrong with these odd men - gah!
/r/askFDS16/04/21 07:14 PM
5

I said that I’d prefer to do something like lunch on a first date for safety reasons. He said he’d do some research to see what pubs were open and make a plan, which sounded good, but he has now not txted me for 2 days (unless he does tonight but its 8pm) and our date is meant to be tomorrow so now he’s low value man for keeping me hanging :)Thanks hun guess you’re right - that’s all he was willing to offer.
/r/askFDS16/04/21 07:07 PM
4

Ok thanks - it is a weird date idea! He suggested boat idea initially but I knocked that back for safety reasons. I’ll brace myself for ‘beach walk’ suggestion next...
/r/askFDS16/04/21 07:00 PM
11

I find this too and used to stress out wondering why some women (not many!) seemed to be like this with me but then I read somewhere that out of every 10 people you meet, two will really gel with you and think you’re awesome, two will take an instant dislike to you and 6 will be neutral and not give you much thought either way. I think this happens to everyone, the difference is that when you’re sunny & optimistic you don’t ‘dwell’ on people you dislike and you’re not rude to people you dislike …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/04/21 05:03 PM
23

You must have some extremely interesting insights - can you share some more? Thanks sis!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/04/21 01:24 PM
4

Leave honey. Found out about my fiances porn habit a few weeks before the wedding. Dragged him to emergency couples counselling to explain how strongly I was against it and that I would not marry him if it continued and would divorce him if it did. He promised me he understood and would stop. Over the years it turned into a full blown sex addiction and took over his life and he started cheating with online hookups. No one would ever guess if you met him - and he continued to be loving towards me…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 10:01 PM
14

Me too! Ladies don’t change a thing - the format is perfect and you all make a great team - v entertaining. Loved both episodes - I’ve found my tribe! :)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 04:55 PM
10

My 3yr relationship was mostly really good times but interspersed with him suddenly erupting into fits of inconsolable rage often out of nowhere but at a perceived criticism from me. He would calm down eventually but not apologise just say I made him do it & that he wouldn’t have got so angry if I hadn’t said something in a certain way. I’m so mild mannered and people comment I’m softly spoken (whatever that means) plus being laidback so I tied myself up in knots reading self help books to help …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 11:02 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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