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Professional-Peak935 Archive

View 3 posts and 108 comments by Professional-Peak935 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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24

Brother, I am so sorry. I wish I knew what to say that could help even a little.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/23 08:09 PM
2

Anecdotally, my father went from earning $80k to earning $20k just to spite my mom, and the courts did not care. They lowered his child support despite his earning potential. I have heard, however, that many a judge will make you pay regardless.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/23 08:06 PM
1

https://dalenabosch.com/what-is-a-cheating-spouse-entitled-to-in-divorce/ Alimony, Division of Assets, and Child Custody If you have an extramarital affair, it can significantly impact your divorce proceedings. In many states, adultery is grounds for divorce, so if your spouse cheats, you may be able to use that to improve your bargaining position. So, the answer to questions like, “Do you still get half if you cheated?” or “Does the wife get alimony if she cheated?” Not necessarily. Additionall…
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/23 07:38 PM
1

Who is your cell carrier?
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/23 07:28 PM
1

No, and again, that link does not prove otherwise.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/23 07:00 PM
2

I understand that. I wasn't able to have discretion when I found out. I drove straight home and threw her text logs in her face and took the kids and left.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/23 06:59 PM
1

That simply is not true, and that link doesn't prove otherwise. The fact of the matter is, the end result of the divorce is up to the discretion of the judge. if you google "Does cheating affect alimony?" you will get a bunch of blog posts by law firms claiming that it can in many states.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/23 06:58 PM
3

You should not leave them at all. I repeat, do not leave that house. Do not move. If you're convinced she cheated, file for divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/23 06:43 PM
1

Burn it down, dude. There will be fire no matter what. Be the one who controls it.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/23 06:42 PM
1

The new guy only matter if you are in a fault state and you can show it was prior to separation/the cause of your divorce Not true. Affairs can affect alimony and asset distribution, as well as anything else the judge want it to affect.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/23 06:41 PM
1

"Fault" only matters when justifying the divorce. But affairs can still be used by the judge to justify lower alimony and asset distribution.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/23 06:40 PM
2

Everyone I've talked to about it has assure me it's extremely common. My boss says everyone who works here has been through it, and at his age, he doesn't know anyone who hasn't.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/23 06:38 PM
2

True. As badly as I want to know the extent of the cheating, it would ruin me.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/23 06:37 PM
1

I'm so sorry you're hurting. Have you considered marital counselling? I know it doesn't work for everyone, but a third party will help her understand your needs and these fears of the cheating.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/23 06:33 PM
1

Yeah that money is gone. Sorry, mate. Try to get written or recorded (if legal where you live) evidence that she agreed to pay you back then sue her in small claims.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/23 06:29 PM
1

Cheaters deserve the worms.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/23 03:33 PM
2

I'm so sorry. That is unforgivable that your wife would do this. How is she allowed to move and take your son? My wife moved three hours away and she's about to become a weekend mom because of it...
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/23 03:31 PM
2

I get that. People do grow apart and develop unreconcilable differences. I don't think biblical marriage anticipated how badly we would deteriorate the concept of marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/23 03:08 PM
1

I do it too. I'm still in love with my wife. I miss her so much.
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/23 09:36 PM
9

The person she was is dead. Missing them is just mourning a death.
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/23 08:29 PM
3

Throw it away when you're ready.
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/23 08:15 PM
1

Sex without begging? Is there such a thing?
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/23 06:35 PM
1

Right that just sucks. She should have to incur the penalty, too. Or a court order should exempt the penalty.
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/23 06:32 PM
2

Women will claw desperately for anything they think will help their case no matter how low or evil it is. Mine subpoenaed my military discipline records. Literally nonsense shit that happened ten years ago that amounted to nothing. "Look, your honor! He got put in time out in kindergarten! He is a bad person! Give me all his money!"
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/23 04:18 PM
3

Okay, think for a second. You're gonna get to court and the judge is going to see that this situation is already in place, you're already paying her, you're clearly fine with her not working because you're giving her money. Cut her off right now. She can work. Women always do this shit. They think work is for men and sitting at home and being spoiled is what they're supposed to do. Stop feeding the problem, dude. She will take advantage of you until you stop letting her. Take your daughter from …
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/23 04:14 PM
1

Why are you paying her at all? Did the court order you to?
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/23 03:19 PM
2

Take this how you will, but people can change. I personally don't advocate throwing away marriages for anything other than abuse or infidelity. Tell her you need marital counselling because you're not sure you can go on with things if you can't both find some common ground. If she refuses, I guess I consider that abuse. But I think you owe it to the sanctity of marriage to fight for the person you married.
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/23 03:19 PM
3

Don't listen to a word the new lawyer says, and don't give her anything she wants. This is a game of tug-of-war and you have to pull back as hard as you can just to keep your half. The new lawyer wants to scare you into settling fast. That means the ex is scared. Trust your lawyer and take it to trial if you have to. That's what I'm doing. The extension thing is very common. They want to give you time to screw up and get too tired to fight. Live like a monk these next few months. Focus on yourse…
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/23 02:43 PM
15

I threw it in a fit of rage and it broke in two. My daughter found the pieces later and put them one on top of the other and said, "Look, Daddy, now it's a rainbow!" which to me, as a Christian, is symbolic of beauty that comes after destruction and that God keeps His promises.
/r/Divorce_Men27/06/23 09:39 PM
1

That's stupid.
/r/Divorce_Men27/06/23 08:58 PM
1

Why would you not just do the subtraction...? Give her 60k and keep the 190k...
/r/Divorce_Men27/06/23 08:44 PM
2

You're gonna learn pretty quick that she is scheming behind your back and you're trying to play nice. You are now at war and she is the enemy. Get a lawyer ASAP, get those in-laws the fuck out of your house. "Says she'll go after spousal support if..." she is going to do that anyway. She now wants to erase your existence but keep your income. She wants to bleed you dry. Don't convince yourself you are the exception and can have an amicable divorce. She wants to see you fail because she is bettin…
/r/Divorce_Men27/06/23 08:43 PM
1

Eh, maybe not. Wife has joint residency of the home even if she weren't on the deed or mortgage. Cops might not do anything.
/r/Divorce_Men27/06/23 08:40 PM
6

I want more than that, but yeah, that's what hurts the most right now.
/r/Divorce_Men27/06/23 08:38 PM
9

I'm so happy to hear she is miserable.
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/23 08:51 PM
5

Yet, even knowing that, I just spent that last hour outside by the dumpster at my work screaming and crying. It has been a year since she left me but I'm still a mess. I refuse to let it go. I don't want to be happy without her.
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/23 04:49 PM
2

I did for about six months after she left. I only stopped when I realized she enjoyed it.
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/23 03:53 PM
17

She will believe that until her world comes crashing down. People who cheat are narcissists. They believe only their happiness matters, and they will lie and hurt other people to make that happen. That never works out for them. My dad had an affair with my mom's best friend. They got married. He spent the next ten years in a shit house with 9 of us kids, four from her marriage she wrecked. He filed bankruptcy and lost everything. My step mom got fat and gross. My dad ultimately ended up getting …
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/23 03:52 PM
27

The grass is never greener. Women put on a front and pretend that life is great, but cheaters ALWAYS lose. They are never actually happier. Don't let the devil lie to you like that.
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/23 03:36 PM
2

I started bawling today for no reason. It felt like I was having a heart attack just knowing that my girl is gone. The love of my life and the perfect woman for me will never love me again. I don't think I'll ever get over her.
/r/Divorce_Men23/06/23 08:33 PM
4

Killed myself.
/r/Divorce_Men23/06/23 07:16 PM
1

It's insanely hard not to. I still want my wife to come back more than anything in the world. I don't want my kids to grow up the way I did, being carted across the state every week. I miss my wife terribly, and I'm beside myself that she would throw her entire family away like this, so lashing out is all I can even think to do.
/r/Divorce_Men23/06/23 05:58 PM
3

She did not contribute a dime during the marriage at all, but stayed at home with the kids for about 3 years. The down payment was "marital property." My oldest will be starting kindergarten next August.
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 10:20 PM
2

You may be in shock, or maybe you already mourned the death of the marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 06:02 PM
1

I take my kids to a doctor and she takes them to another.
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/23 05:34 PM
1

I did not, but if you think you can agree on things amicably, that's the cheaper option. My ex and I were never going to agree on anything, so mediation wasn't an option. Ironically, she begged me to let her cancel the divorce and go through mediation instead after the judge didn't give her anything she wanted.
/r/Divorce_Men21/06/23 08:05 PM
1

Yeah, it's an overused term, but I think culture and the internet have made narcissistic tendencies more prevalent in today's generations. I think, especially here in America, people are becoming more selfish and defensive than before.
/r/Divorce_Men21/06/23 08:02 PM
5

My ex abandoned our kids with me when she left. Told me she didn't want anything to do with this family anymore now that she had her affair partner (who obviously didn't end up staying.) I told her that's fine by me and that I'll have my attorney draw up the appropriate forms for child support. She laughed and said, "women don't have to pay child support." I'm still laughing about that.
/r/Divorce_Men21/06/23 08:00 PM
1

Mine demanded a new judge and tried to reverse the divorce halfway through because the judge didn't give her what she wanted. Can you imagine if they could just keep demanding new judges until they get what they want?
/r/Divorce_Men21/06/23 05:20 PM
1

We are one day into it now, and already i can tell its bothering the kids Well yeah, they're one day into a massive change. They will adapt.
/r/Divorce_Men21/06/23 05:18 PM
2

I take Lexapro. It helps me a ton.
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/23 09:22 PM
3

I've seen a lot this week surprisingly.
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/23 09:21 PM
2

I...wouldn't think so? That doesn't sound like it should be any of her business unless the judge says so.
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/23 06:59 PM
1

Definitely. I dream of finding a red pigtailed girl who teaches horseback riding lessons.
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/23 06:55 PM
11

You've declared war. She is now your enemy. Prepare to have everything you do scrutinized and used against you. Stop drinking. Don't talk to women at all. Don't text and drive. Don't do anything that could possibly cause your life to look anything but stable for the kids. Especially when it comes to her mother. That will likely cause problems, depending on some other factors. Mother-In-Law now hates you too, without the past love to remember. She might try to keep the kids from you if she's watc…
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/23 06:51 PM
5

Let them know what you want and what you expect your ex to use against you (everything.) Do not convince yourself that this will be an amicable divorce. Prepare yourself for the worst, and hope for the best.
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/23 06:45 PM
2

click your name in the top right, user settings, message and chat setting, who can message me.
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/23 05:27 PM
1

I tried to message you but I think you have it turned off.
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/23 05:00 PM
1

Alternatively, I'll never marry a woman who doesn't at least work. My ex refused to get a job at all.
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/23 04:52 PM
1

Possibly. In one hand, I knew she was going to do this too, so I quickly moved everything into another account so she couldn't. I got away with it because I was the sole breadwinner and solely responsible for handling all finances and bills. If she stole that money to run off and use it to survive like I thought she'd do, she'd have bankrupted me with debt. On the other hand, yours is denying you marital financials that you're entitled to. I would make a spreadsheet and have the math automated s…
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/23 04:33 PM
23

I feel you. The enchantment and purity I felt toward the world when I had my wife and kids here with me was the best thing I ever felt. Now they're gone and so is the luster of life. The veil is gone and I see now that life is just a series of hardships with a few good times thrown in. Marriage today is not what marriage was intended to be. It is not what the Bible says it should be, and the government has taken something spiritual and made it transactional.
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/23 04:04 PM
3

Her duty as a wife was to bring you comfort. It isn't your comfort that caused her to leave, it was her displeasure with your comfort. Women do not like to see men comfortable. They feel eternally deserving of being chased. They have an intrinsic need to feel like they deserve better than what they have. You and I are the same age, and going through the same thing right now. Feel free to reach out if you need a friend. I sure do.
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/23 04:00 PM
1

4 and 2. She left back in July the day I caught her in the affair. Part of the problem is I have PTSD from some shit in the military, and this is a stressor that has reawakened some triggers and irrational responses. I have nightmares every night about her. Woke up crying this morning because of a particularly bad one.
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/23 03:40 PM
1

Next Sunday, but it kills me every week to give them to her. I don't want this life.
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/23 09:35 PM
1

Hey our wives must have read the same playbook. Women always think they're entitled to everything and more in the divorce. Once they decide they want the divorce, they view you as a tax-free, passive income source.
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/23 05:55 PM
1

I'd venture to say that no court would issue that subpoena. That would be absurd. You're allowed to look at legal porn all you want. You're allowed to have bizarre hobbies or religious views if you want. The court doesn't give a shit about your personal life unless it truly affects the children somehow. Unless you're showing it to them or masturbating while they're alone in a swimming pool or some shit, I don't think there is an issue.
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/23 05:53 PM
1

That is not what no-fault divorce means. Judges can still be swayed due to marital misconduct.
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/23 05:51 PM
2

I took my kids to an overly expensive burger and milkshake place, then had to give them back to mom. I cried the whole drive home.
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/23 05:50 PM
3

If you file for divorce, YOU can withdraw the petition. In my state, at least, this is not the case. Once it has been initiated and the respondent has filed a response to the petition, the divorce is moving forward. My ex realized after the first hearing that she got a shit attorney and the judge did not like her, so she begged me to let her cancel the trial and go to mediation. Laughable, since I'm set to win everything.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/23 09:01 PM
1

That last part is hilarious. My ex had her attorney file the petition, but I wish I'd have thought of that.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/23 08:59 PM
1

I think they told my ex that too, and it bit her in the ass. The judge saw that I was trying to fight for my marriage and did not want the divorce. She understood that it was, truly, irrevocably broken due to her cheating, but that I was devastated by it, and she took pity on me.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/23 08:58 PM
2

I wasn't joking. Having kids has been magical and amazing, but knowing they're gonna go through the same thing I did all through my childhood, my heart breaks. I wish I could have them without sharing them with her.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/23 08:27 PM
1

Adopt.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/23 08:06 PM
1

It's a marital debt. She is on the hook for it, too. If you have to sell it, wait for the court to order the sale and she'll have to pay for half the loss.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/23 06:15 PM
6

Yeah this. I think it's hard, especially for teens, to view you as a human being rather than a tool for them to use. Kids are selfish and egocentric. You're a human being who deserves to pursue your happiness, too.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/23 06:13 PM
1

You won't get closure. You will, however, get stronger than the need for it.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/23 06:02 PM
3

You're fine. When they're older they will understand.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/23 05:20 PM
1

I don't think you've set yourself up well here. Unless you're a monster of a body builder and she's a pathetic little dwarf, call the cops when she abuses you. Cops deal with psycho women too. They won't think poorly of you or take you away for calling. If you report a crime, they legally have to intervene. While she's in jail that night, change the locks, get a lawyer the next day, file for restraining order and divorce. It sounds rash but it will likely work out best for you in the end. As for…
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/23 04:38 PM
2

Fault is only necessary in some states to actually initiate the divorce. Some states won't let you get divorced for no reason, so you have to be able to prove who is at fault. No-fault states just let you get divorced for any reason or none at all. But the judge can still order whatever they want. If you can prove your wife had an affair, you may get out of paying alimony. My lawyer didn't mention it either, likely so I didn't get my hopes up, but we were only married for 7 years, so she didn't …
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/23 03:23 PM
2

"At-fault" is commonly confused. Even in a "No-Fault" state, marital misconduct can impact alimony and division of assets.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/23 08:20 PM
1

Got mine done at 27. The VA loves to snip you when you're on disability, lol. Cheaper in the long run. I was definitely sore though.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/23 07:13 PM
2

So now she's very private and always keeps her phone with her even after stating that she wants me in her life and will never lie to me again. She is cheating on you. Women who horde their phone are cheating.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/23 07:11 PM
1

PARENTAL ANNIHILATION! 😂
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/23 07:08 PM
1

Yeah me too. That sounds amazing.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/23 07:07 PM
1

Last night my four year old and my two year old were sitting on the couch watching TV and my two year old leaned over and hugged his sister and told her he loved her so much. That might not sound like it has anything to do with me, but I know how my parents divorce affected me, so to see them so loving and happy and feel safe in my home made me feel like I'm doing something right.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/23 07:05 PM
1

I look forward to the desperate pleas from my cheating ex and the chance to remind her how badly she hurt me. Accountability is so hard for women.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/23 07:03 PM
1

I do too. A year later and I still have constant nightmares about her moving back in and demanding I let her keep seeing her AP, or catching them in my bed, or actually killing him and knowing I'm going to prison for the rest of my life. I have diagnosed PTSD from some military shit, but this is the recent stressor that triggers my symptoms. They prescribed me Prazosin for the nightmares, but it doesn't help much.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/23 07:02 PM
1

My ex was addicted to online shopping and watching facebook reels and tiktoks. We could be having a very important conversation and she'd interrupt me to shove a cat video in my face and then wouldn't understand why I'd get mad or walk away. I was practically raising another kid at that point. But, of course, it was my "attitude" and "manipulation" that made her leave, and not her depression and the affair she had.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/23 06:59 PM
1

Ha. My ex tried a something similar. She left me and moved in with her boyfriend 180 miles away; 3.5 hours by car. Then she stupidly filed for divorce in my town. Courthouse 5 minutes from my house, 3.5 hours for her. Ultra conservative judge. Did not go well for her. Dig your heels in hard. This is your kids home, they need you, you deserve to see them. She does not get to uproot them and take them from you.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/23 06:56 PM
1

Nah, you're just dead wrong. I hope no woman is ever dumb enough to think you are someone worth giving her life to, because you're a disgrace.
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/23 05:55 PM
0

Then you are an immoral man.
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/23 05:07 PM
2

Maybe if you'd recognize that you're not perfect, we'd feel differently. But a ton of us here have been cheated on and are being divorced by our wives, so we don't appreciate hearing from cheaters. You act like you don't deserve this divorce, otherwise you wouldn't be here asking for support. It's wrong for an offender to expect sympathy, and the majority of this thread seems to agree.
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/23 09:57 PM
2

Seriously, and the fact that this guy thinks otherwise and is unwilling to hear it is absurd. You shit the bed, now lie in it.
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/23 09:51 PM
1

Lol, no. You're clearly not mature enough to understand this concept.
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/23 09:50 PM
0

Do any of those things warrant cheating in your mind? I certainly hope not.
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/23 04:04 PM
0

I don't hate him or anything, I just don't agree that he has learned his lesson. He came here to complain about the pain of a divorce that he very much deserves. Would you listen to someone cry about prison life after they commit murder? No, they deserve what they got. It's insulting to us real victims of divorce to pretend like this guy deserves sympathy.
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/23 04:04 PM
18

I am going through a divorce where my wife cheated, and I was a child who grew up in a broken home because my father cheated. I know how it feels to be betrayed like that by someone you loved and thought you could trust. And despite all the shitty things my father has done since then, I hate him the most that he cheated on my mother, since I now know what she went through. And I hate my wife even more because I know what my kids will go through. You need to accept a hard dose of reality that you…
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/23 05:26 PM
3

I'm sick of everyone saying narcissist. People are obsessed with this idea that every bad person they know is a narcissist, as if wanting what's best for you is a personality disorder. Sure, I think the world is more selfish than it used to be, and we see those traits of narcissism more and more, but come on people. That and 'gaslighting.' Holy shit the number of women I see using that term that don't even know what it means. They seem to think it means "telling me something I don't want to hear…
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/23 04:33 PM
7

Good men don't cheat. Just because you forgive yourself doesn't mean what you did is forgivable.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/23 04:31 PM
13

It's like your body is going through the motions, but your soul is just crushed. And you realize you're going to go through the rest of your life on your own - even if you meet someone else, it will never be the same. But the hardest thing - honestly - is going along your day-to-day life while you are just imploding inside. It's crazy. Oh yeah? Imagine how she felt after discovering your affair. Ffs look at all this accountability dodging. You violated your marriage vows. You violated your wife'…
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/23 04:30 PM
2

I hate women.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/23 04:22 PM
1

My attorney says she's confident we'll get a favorable outcome because of Mom's relocation. That's or she knows I'm paying her enough to deserve to hear that.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/23 03:51 PM
1

That's the plan. They're in daycare now at both houses. She refused to work because she refused to let someone else watch the kids, now they are in daycare nearly everyday and she has to work, and she sees them half as often. But of course she acts like this is great for her and she's so happy.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/23 03:50 PM
1

Show the judge you are fighting for the stability and peace in your kids lives that they deserve. Show that you can provide them with those things. Don't attack mom, attack the situation.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/23 03:49 PM
1

No. In my proposed plan, I ask that she be ordered to do all the driving. Currently, I drive one hour and she drives 2.5.
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/23 08:53 PM
1

Right. My kids are super young, so they're not "established" in the schools yet, but I am fighting for Primary. My proposed parenting plan is that she gets every other weekend and she pays me child support. I own a home, a car, have a career, and am established in my community. She lives in a room at her moms house and is borrowing a car from her.
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/23 08:30 PM
1

How did that happen?
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/23 08:13 PM
1

My ex told me she wanted a divorce on a Monday but stayed till Friday. On Tuesday she wanted sex. She tried to use it to claim I raped her, which failed because she couldn't commit to doing it.
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/23 08:04 PM
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