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PuzzleheadedRow9896 Archive

View 0 posts and 1,014 comments by PuzzleheadedRow9896 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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–

I'm not disagreeing that's likely, I'm saying, they'd only come back if the person they met up with didn't work out. And predicting who wouldn't work out is incredibly difficult. As much as who would work out. Again, I know people who have current partners from the app they met within the last year. Obviously it hasn't ended in marriage yet, but, luck. Why would some people be finding a person they can last with and others aren't. Luck.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 03:10 AM
–

An algorithm just connects folks, they're still strangers who have to talk and meet up and date. My brother would have met his wife, hmmm mathing. 2018 maybe? My friend it would have been 2023. Again, they can't control if the people actually hit it off. That's where luck enters.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 02:27 AM
–

I'm not disagreeing you can to some extent guess, dude. I'm saying it's pretty hard to control for and give someone the one or not. To go back to my example, my brother went on about 20 dates before he met his now wife. My best friend went on two before meeting her husband. There's no clear rhyme nor reason. It's luck.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 01:52 AM
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I'm guessing it's all the penis puns this lends itself to? I've never had a problem with a boys bathroom, boy scouts, men's leagues of any kind, male sports, whatever. The armed forces. The only way I would oppose it is if it is a place somehow connected to the halls of power or promotion. And my opposition wouldn't do much, honestly. I think this is just cringe because of the thing it's about. And the penis puns. Both. If you had a man only yoga retreat that'd be cool. I support a boy's night. …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 01:37 AM
–

I don't think any algorithms could account for if two people actually hit it off or not is what I'm gesturing at.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 01:32 AM
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Same. Maybe the did confront me. I so rarely check PMs.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 09:34 PM
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Life without such choices is quite a dubious proposition in terms of positivity. Things are quite desperate if the best you can say is "I'm not dead or in a ditch". Gratitude for this is useful for emotional optimism, but not so much genuine I'm blessed. I hardly think not thinking you should have to wed or fuck for them is entitlement. I live in a place immigrants come to and I gotta tell you....nope. Frankly, most move here and ruin it and take it for granted in ways people born into it never …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 06:30 PM
–

I am not claiming they were servants. I'm claiming they could not at varying degrees freely choose their dating and romantic lives...and that it is a good thing they can now. And I find the hint that they should be thankful for what they did get because the other option was death or destitution to be....suspicious at best. Is it real gratitude if you couldn't choose anything else is a real question. Are they thankful...or is this more groveling attempts to ingratiate yourself with a system and p…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 05:02 PM
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I know. Like, yikes. Mistrust and talking about it doesn't mean I think y'all belong in cages.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 03:31 PM
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Have never seen churches overruling anything. They were generally part of the mechanism of control. And most often men were picking who they wanted and seeking approval...not by talking to the girl if you catch my drift.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 03:29 PM
–

Hard disagree. Entitlement is about feeling like you are owed something. The fact he manages not to have even darker feelings or to hold back from acting them doesn't change the first emotion from being entitlement...it's just a question how deep and dark that gets.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 03:11 PM
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Damn. Does this happen instantly? My husband is about five years off 40. I can't wait. I also can't figure out why all the 40 year olds I knew when I was 20 were poor or middle class. Is this a new patch?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 02:39 PM
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I agree men have experienced this as well, although rarely related to romance and sex. Women's sexuality and commitment was seen as property of men or their only good worth trading. Which sources would you like me to use...because all the ones I've studied suggest parental permission and feudal lords decided who women could wed...thus all the Shakespeare plays about using trickery on men to get a match your parents would not have accepted.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 02:38 PM
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Bisexual is separate from being men or women. It's like being, I dunno a nerd or a jock. It comes with a set of characteristics and generalize behaviors. How those are carried out and exhibited will be influenced by other things like say gender. Yes, generally regardless of gender they will be more messy. How may differ, but chaos and mess will be attached. Beyond chaos and mess how someone deals with chaos and mess will be influenced by gender and how they perceive bisexuality will also be infl…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 02:34 PM
–

Half aren't failing in the more recent generations. That half stat is generally misleading. Not sure where your evidence the person who initiated the failure is the one who benefits most is coming from either. I don't think we need an alternative. We just need people not rushing into things and more preparation for marriage without cohersion to get married.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 02:29 PM
–

Both my grandmothers married from necessity....that's regularly been a thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 01:21 PM
–

Yes, absolutely. Men like hot and aren't as turned off by messy. So this is sensible. They always think that threesome is gonna happen. Men and women have different sexuality and risk taking tendencies. So no, you would not expect to see a woman chasing a threesome with some hot bi baddies.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 01:20 PM
–

If you wish to appeal to legal code, I don't think we'll have much to say. The historical and literary record is replete with examples of arranged marriages, forced marriages, and women being given to men as property. Following that era, the social and financial pressures forced women to marry men they were not interested in and in many cases barely tolerated simply to survive. It was really by my mother's era women had the freedom to truly choose a partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 12:59 PM
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Question: are all 40 year olds rich in this fantasy you've made up? I'm pretending like it matters. Most 20 year old women aren't attracted to most 40 year olds men. When I was 20, they were considered gross and creepy in the overwhelming 99% of cases.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 12:55 PM
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I never tried to date another woman or a bi woman, so nothing I'm about to say is special to gay or bi men: The way LGBT people have been forced to live their lives up until say the last 20 years and even persisting still tends to create what I personally would consider higher degrees of confusion, sexual degeneracy (being into comically weird shit off putting to most people, especially women), secrecy, and mistrust. Young people are already messy and stupid. Being even half gay increases the me…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 12:50 PM
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Women also didn't have to trust because no one really cared if she trusted because she was property. I personally like the freedom I had to choose. I'm sorry if people struggle to communicate their trustworthiness to each other in a world where women don't have to do as they're told.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 12:19 PM
–

Believing people should be equal under the government is not the same as thinking people should be equally under you in cowgirl. I'm not even a progressive and I recognize this.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 12:15 PM
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Not at all, only some kinds of disagreement would be evidence of the pathology. It would also really help if non traumatized men were to be in agreement with the red pill philosophy to a strong degree. There are almost only men drawn to it after painful experiences. Nearly exclusively. As in I haven't met the healthy among you...but it did is the problem. There isn't a leader of the red pill framework who doesn't begin from their place of trauma. And that is going to badly bias the outcome of ob…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 12:10 PM
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Lmao. Me advocating self defense is not the same as advocating truly draconian tyranny and near enslavement of men. Nor is me advocating taking the risk suicidal men pose to their families seriously by sharing information and asking questions in order to prevent loss of life the same as basically suggesting men be placed in gimp suits. I do not believe men belong in camps and I also don't believe this indicates I don't believe they can be dangerous and should be at times treated as such. I'm all…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 11:57 AM
9

Wait...you actually want women to react to the reality of how some men have generically treated us despite not being able to instantly terminator style sense which men are safe and unsafe? I mean if you insist...ahem. I think men should rounded up into camps have their willies caged and have to wear handcuffs, feet cuffs, and a shock collar to leave their houses. They can have a cute little key around their necks that a woman can unlock if she feels safe enough. Let's advocate about this, circle…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 03:27 AM
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That's most of the battle and I hope you find it again!!
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 03:16 AM
–

I think that's gonna really depend what you're looking for.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 02:32 AM
0

They wouldn't recognize it because it is the thing they are protecting their payche from dealing with. I'm not describing what red pill is exactly. I'm describing essentially the presuppositions and framework that informs the understanding of dating. The pattern reading software. I agree truth is separate from why...I do not agree this is like economics in that sense. I understand red pillers think so. I would argue they think so because this is part of their urge towards controlling the things …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 01:29 AM
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Mostly just introspection on what wasn't working, what caused the demise of things, lots and lots of podcasts, giving up, meeting the right person, and then working like the dickens not to repeat previous fatal errors. If you mean meeting folks: just did my thing and let fate carry me to my husband so we shared commonalities of some degree. Actually, hilariously, he's both the person I've shared the most commonalities with and the least hobbies and focused interests.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 01:16 AM
4

The personality hire has always existed.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 07:46 PM
2

I don't need to virtue signal. I'm married and I'm no one. I'm telling you why the mockery is there and why it has nothing to do with a man revealing his feelings.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 06:41 PM
1

I'm pretty good at reading nervous to talk to me and hiding something sneaky (goes with the territory of teaching middle school). So no, some nerves would be fine. Although if he had honey goat cheese that would help a lot.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 05:25 PM
1

Signs of homelessness or a general sense of unease in him. I mean so long as we're in a public place, I don't love pepper jack, but I'd chat a few moments and see if he's chill. Especially if he made the offer well.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 05:16 PM
1

Am I already in the park? Are they scary looking? What kind of cheese and berries?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 05:13 PM
7

I love when men present my mockery of their facade of stoicism and control as me shaming their feelings. When the feelings are in the room with us I will treat their vulnerability gently. As long as I am being asked to indulge their mask of superior control, the mockery remains and is for their own good as much as mine. They need to know the only person they're fooling is themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 02:59 PM
3

Art is a buffer and offers deniability and separation and I'm already over it. It's often a way to avoid things and weirdly not be vulnerable. Also, y'all ain't Phil Collins. Most of y'all couldn't write a couplet about how you feel and what's really motivating you with any genuine degree of honesty. O.o did you just agree with me after spending all this time pretending not to agree with me that red pill is just men processing trauma while pretending to be engaged in science? I know. Thanks. Gla…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 10:53 AM
4

Vocaloid. No, they aren't. They're just less overt in their brokenness. I understand it isn't Marilyn Manson obvious, it's like Kurt Cobain obvious. No you don't because you are not stupid, sir. You realize these things are unrelated and that really none of this is about what you say. It's about your fears of a relationship souring or going badly and what that could entail. But you aren't interested in confronting those feelings. Which is why I say men don't talk about their feelings really. If …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 10:44 AM
6

Great words.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 10:37 AM
1

I'd like and subscribe.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 10:36 AM
5

Honestly, I'd tell red pill men to date an aardvark in a Hatsuna Miku cosplay if I thought they'd do it because that too would be better than the negativity spiral they're in. Ahh yes, I forgot that the science shows it is best not to have things in common with your partner. Because the entire purpose of relationships is to avoid giving leverage to anyone. It's actually exceedingly strange people think the opposite. You've turned me right around. See I thought me and my cat both enjoying a nap a…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 04:33 AM
7

Uh huh. Sure it is. That's why men spend so much time sharing their "field reports" about "female behavior" that seems to have shockingly little to do with getting laid and an enormously strange amount of listing grievances, traumas, damages, mistreatments, injustices, and sorrows. Now, I've never tried to bed a woman, but I can't say a tirade about how someone has been mistreated by women seems like a tactic I'd try. Maybe I'm just old fashioned tho, I'd probably compliment her eyes first and l…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 04:17 AM
1

Every day, I wake up and learn what a force of nature I am from PPD merely from being born a woman. I'm causing the collapse of society, all moral values, the cost of living crisis, male loneliness, a replacement rate crisis, and bad men to remain in the gene pool. All in a day's work. Feels pretty good to know I'm doing my part. But no, women did not cause the cost of living crisis. Wealthy elite types playing chutes and ladders with the economy and global political stage did. Prices would not …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 04:06 AM
3

Eh, it's not necessarily true they're making it that way. Bad luck is entirely possible. My brother found his wife there and my BFF met her husband. But my other BFF has gone through the jungles of dating apps and just seems genuinely cursed despite looking for her husband and being pretty reasonable as far as I've ever seen. I think people don't account for bad luck enough with online dating. Knowing how to use it won't fix fate being a bit of a damn sweet time taker.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:56 AM
2

It is true. We attend almost anything involving a good cheese plate. Especially if there's fruit too and perhaps some adorable little crackers? I mean, I've attended some extremely boring work affairs, but if the cheese plate was good, I endured. Why not a picnic in the park? Especially if there was a whimsical blanket to sit on!?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:52 AM
10

I feel like the point of the red pill is for men to deal with their traumas and emotions without having to say effeminate things like "working through trauma" or "dealing with my emotions" or using the f word (feelings). Instead they turn those things into a conspiracy theory that they must "think their way through" using facts, logic, statistics, analysis, science, and philosophy. You know. Traditionally masculine things which women don't really do because they don't match their shoes very well…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 02:45 AM
4

They were in the past, dude. Women having choice over pregnancy is a relatively novel idea caused by science more than some actual change in our biology. And no, I won't cease the comparison because the comparison is about being biologically suited to something. Not a political autonomy. If you wish to go there, men too have choice. They just cannot remain a member in good standing with that nation if they don't fight.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/26 12:40 PM
4

Both.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/26 12:37 PM
5

To be fair to them, they do advocate for this inclusion. Frankly to a frustrating point to anyone that actually believes in biological realities like men being physically more suited for certain gigs by not a small mile. War and child birth are those weird areas where you can't really shake the fact each gender is significantly the correct answer to the problem. Men can't have the babies so life is already stacked in their favor pretty significantly. Women can technically fight in war, but we're…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/26 04:36 AM
11

I think there's an accuracy here to some extent and I think a lot of the pain we see on this front is coming from bad or absent parents, a lack of mentor figures, and a lack of platonic love between men and a refusal to bask in platonic love from women if erotic love is unavailable. But, I also think a lot of people jump from being loved for mere existence to confusion and outrage and not being selected for erotic or romantic companionship. And the problem is that both include a survival and att…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/26 04:31 AM
2

Agreed. And frankly, we're even more obnoxiously in love when we're alone.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/26 04:21 AM
–

I'm sure you have and I'm so sorry that happened to you. It wasn't a few for us. I've gone through around 98% of this list most with different guys, most multiple times. It's not a few weird uncomfortable moments. Frankly, it's more like a few comfortable moments honestly. It's weirder to be comfortable around men who want sex with you than the opposite because a significant amount of them do this shit. I'm sorry you think this not happening is an ideal world or fantasy or soap box. Again, kinda…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/26 12:09 AM
4

I thought you might say that. Why are you saying this? Is it because you feel it to deeply be true and know it will please her to hear it and finally the time has arrived you can say it? Not an example of telling her what she wants to hear when I say it like that is it. Because you want to say it. You've wanted to say it. Now you can. Lovely. Her enjoying it is secondary to speaking the truth. Or are you saying it because you know she wants to hear it and you want to fuck her and this is a step …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 11:43 PM
–

They would not say she didn't want sex with them when they tell events. They would say she had to be seduced, persuaded, set at ease, or any other number of weird rephrasings of "I pressured her". And then with the forgotten from the record part. She said yes, so she was always open to it so I didn't pressure her, she could have said no, etc. So well known is this that Always Sunny has a fabulous scene on it. But again, here you are saying the no must be emphatic, a common tactic to apologize fo…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 11:31 PM
3

I'll put it back to you: give me an example in which you could do this and it would not be a lie.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 11:25 PM
7

My husband was paying for me when we were just friends hanging out and I had to all but beg him to let me buy him dinner one time and the whole time he looked like how I imagine most men look if you asked to chop their dick off. I was baking so much bread to say thank you that it honestly would have been easier for him to let me buy. During dating, absolutely not. Our arrangement became that he bought meals when we were out and I paid for and cooked meals for us once or twice a week at home and …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 11:09 PM
8

If someone is approaching relationships with a fuck you, bitch, pay me attitude...I can only assume they are not seeking anything long term...or healthy. Now, if your advice to men is to look for some kind of reciprocated affection then I whole heartedly agree. But if this is just bean counting dollars and cents...well, as your therapist, are you sure you want a relationship at all? Like seriously, it's allowed to not be cut out for this whole love thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 11:06 PM
–

It's complicated. I think those stats accurately reflected my experience of men. Clearly, not every man is doing all of those things or even any of those things. But most men have a script and mindset at the start (we're talking say starting at maybe 15 to 16) that you kind of need to trick or pressure women into bed and so long as they eventually say yes, everything before that is forgotten from the record. Now, many grow out of this, largely, I expect because women receive them so poorly for t…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 10:27 PM
1

I don't think this is all men. I'm married to a man that never did any of this. If I thought men couldn't be different, I wouldn't criticize it the same. I think the fact you're mentioning men who don't even ask women out actually bolsters the case. Why don't they beyond personal demons? Because the only script they know is the one they know makes women uncomfortable and treats them like someone to be tricked and they don't wanna do that. The other is fearing her saying no so they don't take the…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 10:14 PM
1

Maybe because we say stuff like this rather than showing there is hope to get over it.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 10:04 PM
2

You're talking about a con artist. Talk about the average dating experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 09:00 PM
2

I don't disagree with your philosophy entirely, but, it could be years of friendship then something sparked and that person doesn't have good discipline over their feelings and wants.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 08:56 PM
3

They're schrodingers types. They both bring up the siren call of pussy as a force which shapes the universe and then despise when women suggests this makes them bullshit artists and users. So they bring up like money. Like most of us are out here method acting to get that free Chinese Buffet or cup of coffee.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 06:05 PM
1

It doesn't go both ways that much because most of you don't really have anything of value especially when young. Most of us ain't using a man for that Applebee's dinner or a drink. Juice wouldn't be worth the squeeze. I agree watch who a woman is at the beginning, but, women ain't putting on a front near so much as men because there's really no reason to. What do y'all have we really want like men want sex? And again, most men. Don't pretend you're all Elon Musk and Timothee Chalemet together. Y…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 06:02 PM
3

It sounds like you're inventing interpretations of the author methodology in order to pretend men ain't doing manipulative shit. Which I get, but is outlandish. I find repeatedly asked for sex to be pretty clear. You asking her to come over on different days when you're dating is not nearly the same and we all know it. She kept seeing you, which indicates interest. I think you're at the heart of this so let me make it clear: that behavior is not benign. Men see it as benign because of their agen…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 05:55 PM
3

Where would you put this in the survey of actions, cuz I ain't seeing it. But maybe I missed it. I don't think many of the guys are thinking "i massaged a knot out of the neck of my girlfriend and then her mood shifted". It doesn't make any sense that they are thinking this. What you did was loving and not with the intent to get sex unless I'm misunderstanding you. And again, pre established relationship. This didn't seem to be about pre established relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 05:46 PM
4

He made it seem like they were friends and then feelings happened.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 05:26 PM
2

Sure, that could be.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 05:26 PM
0

I've had both of these happen. More of these than the others, honestly. And I've had lots of dudes catch feelings for me. Turns out, when both people value the friendship a lot is possible that seems unusual to people who don't strongly value the friendship.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 05:26 PM
5

You guys are in a pre existing relationship, very different than anything being discussed. And this example is very different than anything being discussed.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 05:24 PM
0

What about option D: He gracefully accepts the rejection, takes some time to let the feelings fade, and then you go on to be bestest buddies. Or even option E: there is some mutual feelings, but you both agree it's not a good idea to pursue anything and then after some time go on to be bestest buddies.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 05:06 PM
3

Simped for the wrong girl. I've done it for the wrong man too. Lmao. OK. So your made up bullshit. It ain't over compensating if it's real genuine glee at each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 05:04 PM
3

Cool. You coerced women into relationships with you. Call it what it is at least. You can't get a woman to freely consent to you. And I'm imagining that coercion has played a role in the ending of things in these relationships. Wrong is wrong. You saying touch grass because your coercion worked is nonsense. No one says lying doesn't work. It's wrong is the point.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 04:31 PM
2

Simping is a stepping stone to love. They're typically difficult to distinguish outside of longevity and commitment. Says whom? At worst it annoys others.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 04:29 PM
6

If you're talking to them with the goal to manipulate no into yes, you are doing something gross and inappropriate. This game you're playing where you basically suggest all behavior is above board because they never said get lost even though you know that would be rude and inappropriate for them to do is ridiculous and you do know that. But, if men wish to insist on this line of reasoning, women can become that cruel and obnoxious as a baseline. If that's the only way to avoid manipulative sex p…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 04:28 PM
3

You said it so well. No one makes my face shine like my husband and vice versa. And keeping me that way keeps him shining and vice versa.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 04:04 PM
3

And yet they have not is what I'm saying. It isn't ridiculous at all. People who loudly love their person are not ridiculous.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 04:03 PM
7

You need to finish your sentence "for the express purpose of manipulating someone to have sex with you". Stop acting like this is just an attempt to be socially accepted or even desired. This is about being manipulative.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 04:02 PM
4

Sure, but never after I expressly expressed that I did not want their help and never to manipulate me into doing something for their benefit.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 03:43 PM
8

You said people would make fun of ladies for admitting they simp for their man. I'm saying they don't. It's a mutual thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 01:19 PM
6

This can happen to anyone, but I will say, if a man shows no interest in nor indication of generosity. care giving, providing, or looking after when you're just dating and especially if nothing sexual has happened...lady, why would you think getting pregnant is gonna change that. When you're dating and haven't given sex at all, that's his best self, friends. You are seeing who he thinks his best self is. If his best self is a 50/50, never opens the door for you, totally transactional, I just wan…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 12:32 PM
21

O.o I shouldn't be surprised, but everything under 2 is coercive and unacceptable. It's not ambiguous or flirting. And 1 is very clearly indicating lying. A significant amount of 3 is coercion, what the fuck. Almost none of that is acceptable with the exception of focusing on a stranger. .< this isn't making men look better that you think a lot of this is just flirting or proving status. No wonder y'all never understand how many bad men there are. If a man is trying to isolate me and won't stop …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 12:22 PM
–

Not a problem. Won't change. Could change.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 12:14 PM
6

There's no problem happening. These people deserve each other. And I say I'm obsessed with my partner in front of anyone. I don't get roasted. You need to find better circles cuz it sounds like you're surrounded by weak and nasty people.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/07/26 12:14 PM
1

Most of standing up is verbal, not physical. It's saying something is wrong. Most evil people are cowards, very few are any more physically capable than the weaklings. Just expressing something is unacceptable would be plenty. I know, I'm a woman and stand up for folks regularly.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 09:56 PM
5

Proximity is the greatest predictor of relationships. He was in proximity more. He worked to be and was welcomed to be. So yes, sort of. To be fair, it seems likely if she was accepting this behavior she fancied him more.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 08:01 PM
1

They're unsafe for others by fostering an environment where they'd rather shrink from or ignore the bad behavior of their peers than stand up.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 07:57 PM
1

Puts the room in proper order, I suppose. Bad men should feel unsafe and men who are weak and would cover for bad me should feel unsafe. It allows the women to all feel safe.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 05:39 PM
2

I'm not sure if you entirely get the premise of the quote. The idea is everyone should be able to defend what is important and right even if they then spend their time in gardens. Because it is better to be a warrior in a garden than a gardener in a war. I understand many many people regardless of gender are tired of feeling like the ability to have warrior qualities are too heavily prioritized, but it's generically because if you don't have warrior qualities your other qualities are too easily …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 03:45 AM
1

I have, respectfully. And it's extremely pleasant to be around.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 01:58 AM
1

Good men would feel fine. The other kind wouldn't. We want the other kind feeling unsafe. We don't need generic terror in the heart of all men.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 01:47 AM
1

Nah, it can be a quiet power over the room and that is very clearly wielded by those who are unkind or outright immoral.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 01:34 AM
5

I do not equate this with being aggressive nor violent to be clear. Warrior in a garden.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 11:02 PM
3

We like it if other men feel unsafe. Not other women.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 08:36 PM
6

I see no benefit and never have. I have no interest in strange men which eliminates cold approach entirely. As for men I sort of know, I make my interests pretty clear, but I'm not interested a man that cannot nut up and ask me out himself. And I've dated the autistic dweebiest of dweebs. They managed to have courage for one moment in their lives to ask me out. This eliminates me warm approaching. I need not mention safety nor anything else as valid as that may be. It simply does not align with …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 03:19 PM
1

Isn't it nice when all of us can come together and agree someone is nuts? What if your husband tells you to befriend a woman, pet, child, and him?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 04:01 AM
0

I'm gonna speak in video games because: I don't tell the healer they should be taking point cuz it's not what they're built for nor is it likely to yield the outcomes they want. I also don't ask a dps why they ain't healing or a tank to do more damage. Both of these roles bring something EQUALLY valuable to the team and outcome. But I like winning. Is it fun sometimes to be a jerk off and play a healer like a DPS? Sure. But I wouldn't recommend it because I know that's not how the game is best p…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 03:33 AM
2

For sure, I'm just saying I'd defend those women too as not necessarily vapid. They're just feminine and interested in traditionally girly shit.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 07:39 PM
12

Just to be fair, I have a master's degree, purple belt in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, and have engaged in two highly successful careers, read a multitude of books including most of the English Language Greats, can play an instrument, am an excellent cook complimented by proper chefs, and have many other hobbies. And I enjoy some reality television shows and many with my husband as well...I despise the attitude that enjoying reality television is frivolous bullshit for basic bitches lacking in depth. Th…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 04:18 PM
16

Humor us and mention um.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 03:58 PM
10

No, I mean they think that's what men mean. Put more bluntly, when I hear a man say this...he usually means she's not interested in his highly specific quasi autistic ramblings on a niche subject.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 03:57 PM
28

No, it's what we think of when a man complains women don't wanna have deep conversations. 😅
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 02:45 PM
15

Info: give me examples of what you consider to be a deep conversation and what you consider to be very basic.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 02:43 PM
5

They don't say anything. And people usually say something when they see something as praiseworthy. See, the man doing this stuff. Again, men have a lower threshold to be considered good parents. And look, like I'm so far past this even being a problem I'd tackle, but when we can't even admit this, like, then I do wanna fight about it. I've seen men on this very forum giving themselves flowers for being better at holidays and cleaning than the women they divorced. And then you ask a few questions…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 04:53 AM
5

I'm sorry, I just don't agree. People act like dads are saints for doing basic parent shit. A dad comes to get his kid sick from school and everyone is wowed. A dad takes his kid to something important to the kid, like say a batting cage if the kid likes baseball, and everyone's jaw drops how thoughtful he is. This isn't about being a terrible parent. Again, the standard to be good is lower for men.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 04:28 AM
1

Mothers are humans. They can be disappointing. Animals never disappoint.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 03:49 AM
4

I've never seen a woman praised as a great mom just for watching her kids. Maybe this happens somewhere else, but I'm calling bullshit on that. Also, the nice guy thing makes me think you're not understanding the flavor here. A nice guy isn't that exceptional. When we say a woman is nice, it's usually being said about like, nearly Mother Theresa. Someone that remembers every birthday, every minor life event, drives people to appointments, goes out of their way to help people they hardly know. Wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 03:22 AM
1

Doubt it. Firefly would still be with us. Like I said originally, y'all have dogs and mothers that love you. It's not in my nature to make dogs weep.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 03:08 AM
2

Don't sell yourself short, dude. You deserve to do something few humans have ever done by seeing space first. If you can't see the cosmos and go where no one has gone before, you're better off alive. It sucks, I know, but hold yourself to a higher standard, your therapist knows best. Center of the sun or living here on earth.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 01:04 AM
4

Venting? I'm talking about men hiring sugar babies. If complaining got you to the sun I'd already be there. Or, hypothetically, I am using "hyperbole". A word which here means extreme language for dramatic effect.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/26 08:04 PM
4

It would take as long to explain that as to explain why sugar babies also need to be launched. But again, betterment of the social fabric and moral fiber.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/26 08:01 PM
4

Well, what do you wish their origin story was? Kidnapped by the cartel? I think you get my point about attractiveness. They see this as a portal to getting a tall hot rich man who is very clear about why they're together and doesn't want a real connection. He wants a hot woman that can be bought and presented without the moral hang up of prostitution. Don't call it a threat, call it wishful thinking.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/26 07:59 PM
17

How dare hookers develop standards! What is the world coming to?! Won't someone think of the ugly rich men.... Look, my vague understanding of sugar dating is that these women don't really want to be prostitutes as such. If they did, they'd just do that, right? They want a relationship which has pretty explicit expectations about the exchange of money for attention (sexual not definite). And the more that various you tubers have normalized this and typically described the guys as "cute", the mor…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/26 06:57 PM
0

Cold approach is not what is meant by asking someone out. As I constantly tell people here, this is uncommon across time and space including current day. Proximity is the greatest predictor of connection. Warm approach is far and away the most common method of interactions that lead to dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/26 03:30 PM
1

I mean, someone you'd count on, someone you enjoy talking to regardless of romance, someone you share interests with, someone you know decently well. I'd think one on one is more bff terrain or everyone else has left the call and you're both still going. Group settings obviously. It's gonna look different ways to different people obviously. I guess here's the test. If you were with a friend who didn't know this girl and you ran into her at say the grocery store with that friend and she came up t…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 11:47 PM
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Increased neuroticism and increased vulnerability to danger. Some also just love the drama it allows to unfold
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 11:35 PM
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Welcome to your report, dude.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 04:35 PM
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I'm a married woman, dude. I think calling it priest maxxing is funny? Cuz it is. What tools? I'm explaining what I see as explaining why there seemed to be more attractive men in the past...cuz the unattractive ones were more likely to be dead or priests.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 04:29 PM
1

As a teacher, we are witnessing the same degree of learned helplessness in our students every single day. To the point we're starting to teach problem solving skills like you would not believe. It's lack of fathers, it's a school system where you cannot fail, and mothers that don't let go because that's their man. They're victims walking in certain ways. Of course, they need to grab life by the balls, but they're taught this way.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 04:27 PM
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I mean in the past: Homosexuality Neurotypicality (Would have been more likely to priest max and this would have yielded a respected and important position in society celebrating chastity). War kills all types obviously, but if what we understand about looks holds any accuracy, it seems more likely better looking men would be in leadership positions rendering them mildly safer. Poverty was also more of a death sentence and obviously health and attractiveness have always been linked. Low morality…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 04:13 PM
1

E girls? But animated? I dunno. It's stupid, but lots of things are that I'm still fine with existing. I think my only problem would be if boys are watching. But grown ass men, do as ye will.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 01:51 PM
1

Observation of traits and actions. Any trait or action deployed at the right place, at the right time, in the right way is virtue. The opposite is vice. In the case of men's rights. I would say it is vice to endure injustice quietly.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 01:49 PM
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Men who today struggle with attracting a woman for a whole variety of reasons.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 01:47 PM
6

Cemented makes it sound like you had a hunch. I'm mostly trying to understand to what degree it was reasonable for her to think it was going that direction. It's never truly reasonable for a dude to think an entirely platonic relationship may end in romance if enough nice behavior from him occurs. It is reasonable if dating to think a man introducing you round to his family and close friends is growing in commitment and headed towards marriage. Whether you personally see those actions as such or…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 02:50 AM
2

Yes. Multiple times. My husband and I dating for the first few years was like watching stray cats learn to trust a human again.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 02:43 AM
7

My only question: did she know you intended to never marry?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 02:21 AM
1

Every relationship I have ever seen? It may make more sense until you account for how much men seem to hate shopping. They find it emotionally taxing to the nines. Don't ask me to explain it. I'm just living with it and every woman I know and have ever known is. My grandfather ran a fucking grocery store and his wife still had to shop for everything. Doubtful. 35k is a livable wage especially if she's willing to go live with parents or shack up with someone else which most of us are and wouldn't…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 07:23 PM
3

I am the main cook. Cleaning products well, his family were hoarders so god knows when we'll have to buy those. I have more clorox wipes than I know what to do with 🤣 But, no, usually if the person who does that task isn't the shopper, they tell the shopper to get it. Different skills. My husband is the wearer of his clothing and I still buy them and then return it if he hates it. Not being mean...but are you relationshipped and dividing tasks? Cuz it's pretty rare not to have a main shopper and…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 06:46 PM
5

I think women are very durable to certain things and men to others. And a thing men endure better than women is unfairness perceived or not even real. Men do better to things that typically trigger neurosis.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 05:48 PM
4

I think it's just leadership style actually. They follow one big leader. Watch a room of women, sure there's some queen bees, but it's a much more communal process in which everyone is heard and all problems are sort of taken into account and seen as equally deserving of solution. Again, infant care. You can't tell an infant to endure. You naturally become more likely to solve even the most petty or specific of problems. And I'm not saying men's problems are for the record. But if you think a po…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 04:54 PM
15

I don't think it's an accident the biggest men's rights activists have in many cases been women. Men are extremely talented maintainers of status quo. (Which for the record is good when that's a good place. No one maintains paradise like my husband. I'm the idiot seeing flaws, potential, problems, and wondering if our bathroom would be better if it had some sort of waterfall water feature with pond lillies - it would). We're also better at organizing and coordinating in terms of teamwork. You ha…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 03:43 PM
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My first thought for hook up was 2 billion dollars in cash in a suitcase for me. And he has to be easy on the eyes. For relationship: my husband.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 01:47 PM
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I'm in my 30s. I'm not infantalizing anyone. I'm aware I know a lot less about spotting bullshitters and predators than someone nearing 50. And a 20 year old knows less than me. Paying bills got nothing to do with it. That's your focus because you're weirdly refusing to expand beyond mundane adult responsibilities. I know quite a bit. My husband has done it and somehow managed to date during that time. I was raising my kid brother so I know my own story about how family responsibilities can impa…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 01:38 PM
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There is evidence of men like yourself continuing to create themselves, yes. Those men still outrank those women in life experience, a point you continue to ignore in favor of focusing on dating/sexual experience rather than a holistic view. That has always been a controversial age difference outside of say the Regency era. No, it isn't and I think you need to admit you don't know based on your zero experience, don't you. Life experience is the far more relevant element to avoiding predatory dyn…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 01:02 PM
6

The majority of house hold spending is on groceries, household items, clothing, etc. Traditionally the woman is spending this because well...I'm not actually sure. My husband hates shopping so I can only guess most husbands hate these tasks. I don't mind so much so I do it. Most of the bills are also the companies I chose due to cheapness or some other factor. I also run our Roth IRAs and decide how much is invested each week. In turn, one could probably suggest I do 85% of our financial decisio…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 12:22 PM
1

It does not strike me as reasonable to compare a (with love and sympathy) outlandish and unusual case like yourself, a man who has both knowingly and unknowingly sabatoged your life at nearly every conceivable level with that of developmentally normal women. You may just as well summon up the scenario of a cult victim or kidnapee to somehow outline women not thinking of power imbalances. Like yeah, no shit we don't consider this power imbalance, it's extremely rare and self-inflicted. After a ce…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 12:10 PM
1

Dude, I think you're playing a lot of seeming word games to avoid the judgement I am putting in. Lots of women are fine dating men who are abusive or physically violent. They do it all the time and don't make a moral judgement. I'm making a moral judgement. I'm making a moral judgement with all of these. It's not eye color to me. It's not like eh...hope he likes cats. These things MAKE them bad or good. No one who is lazy or unhelpful is good for someone else. They aren't a good fit for anyone. …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 09:09 PM
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I do and could do all these things at the age of 18 when I began to date. Strangely, men mostly wanted me for sex which continued arguably until their mid 20s. And yes, it filled me and fills me with contempt. All the women I know for the record could do these things. They aren't difficult. Servile things really. Go fish! Men just wanting sex is in them and it's trashy.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 01:20 PM
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I'll tell you the reason in 95% of cases. Ready: They aren't ready yet. Having kids and family is the end of freedom, pure individuality, pure adventure, and youth. And they don't wanna give that up. Careers just support the ability to live life on your own terms. Kids and families not so much. They don't need a mirror. They know the reason. You disagree with this reasoning is all...interestingly while coming from the gender which does not gestate, die, and raise the babies nor often get trapped…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 01:18 PM
0

It did not. No one really made moves in our case. It was that organic.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 01:11 PM
1

Yeah, and I'm telling you that is happening. There are better and worse people when it comes to everything including relationships. It isn't "my preference" a man not beat me or abuse me or talk badly about me or be lazy and not help. Those are standards and failure to meet them makes you bad. It isn't my preference they be a hot piece of ass. Failure to meet this makes them a bad choice for romance and sex because that's a standard. A preference is like having brown eyes.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 01:10 PM
5

I do not disagree...but, also, how else will they grow up if that's mentally and communicatively where they are at unless someone talks to them like their development is arrested in Middle school (which it is for a lot of them).
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 03:48 AM
2

I think you're assuming everyone has standards for entry and I'm here to tell you...most don't or those standards are so low you know, most people aren't doing anything to meet them beside get out of bed in the morning. I think you see this dynamic play out a lot with folks who go "you're unworthy bye bye" and people that are like "no wait, stay pls, why you no give attention". And I think, although you seem to not have really defined these terms well, you are against people looking at others as…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 03:01 AM
0

You're assuming he chased me. It was more oddly organic and back and forth than that. We were just in proximity a lot and hung out a lot. It was just mutual magnetic pull.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 02:57 AM
1

Not sure about that, but maybe
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 12:51 AM
3

Yes and no? I think there were fewer undesirable men because they were dead quick, monastery maxing, or excommunicated. I also think the flipside of some of what is good in progressive values is lending itself to disagreeable boys never being forced to grow up and knock their baby bullshit off. But clearly as a macro, men aren't as often selling women like cattle into marriage or forcing themselves on a random peasant girl and many relatively speaking see women as equals and friends as much as s…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 11:58 PM
8

Couldn't it be said I am the arbiter of my own skull sized kingdom of what is and isn't good aka a standard? I am the authority of my reality. If you wish to partake in my reality, you meet the standards?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 11:55 PM
4

I also wouldn't mind if nothing ever started helps. If you asked me, I thought it was gonna be a Jo March type living for the adventure of life. The fact I found my husband and that plan altered somewhat is as surprising to me as anyone. 😅 I recommend an "if it happens it happens" attitude to everyone for basically everything except owning a cat. Make sure the cat happens.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 11:50 PM
7

I don't lie and I don't accept lying. If I don't wish to answer, I make that plain and accept the same. And if the other person does not accept this we are not meant to connect either platonically nor romantically. If those things matter to you, that's acceptable. Find someone who it also matters to.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 05:40 PM
1

Ok. I'm fine with that too.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 05:34 PM
1

This is highly context dependent and no, none of this will ever imply our statements are not of lasting value, mood based, emotional, or caused by the man controlling her emotional state. The only situation I've ever seen no turn to yes in would be when a man barely knows a woman, asks her out, and she says no. However, they persist in being in the same social circles, get to know each other much better, she learns she fancies the man she has come to know, starts flirting, and then he asks her o…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 01:52 PM
2

Not a response to anything I said. Thank goodness my response reaches beyond you, huh?!
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 01:45 PM
3

I couldn't really say. I mean, the shy awkward type is already a type. I can't say I particularly had a type within that type exactly. I guess I didn't try shy awkward loners that don't play video games and aren't nerds....but I've also never met a shy awkward type that wasn't somewhere on the geek to nerd spectrum. If your hobby is carpentry or something, the forced interactions with Home Depot alone cure you of shyness.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 01:44 PM
12

It feels weird to do, but I am a middle school teacher, so, I often explain things which are obvious to adults in kid friendly ways.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 01:41 PM
37

So long as you don't conflate this with women never being interested in men, I'm with you. A strange man who is beautiful is like a painting. I think "oh pretty, that's really cool" and then I keep walking. There is nothing in my brain that says "go talk to him" because he almost isn't real in that way. But a man I know who is attractive, my brain tends to wonder about kissing him because he's real. It's kind of similar to like a stick of gum. If a random guy offered me that, the answer is no th…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 03:54 AM
2

No, but I wouldn't think it was abusive. I'd just break up. Not caring isn't abusive, it's just selfish or aloof or ignorant.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 07:18 PM
11

I'm gonna say it: both my brothers are shy and awkward and one is married the other is pretty young and still dating. It's pretty rare if your only problem is shy and awkward you can't find someone. They plucked up the courage and both managed.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 06:26 PM
8

Critiquing Taylor Swift as a character is fine. It's always fine if it's a character. The question is why are you critiquing real people who you really know? What's the goal? What's the benefit? What is being achieved? Cuz I've never seen anyone say this that wasn't a snide mean little devil being shitty to a hurt person because they're relishing in their pain and demise...so...never is my answer and that's being a bad person? But if you can present to me a case where it is not that and it is ac…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 06:19 PM
2

O_O It sounds like you've had some wife or girlfriend situation, huh? I've never thought my man not asking me about my day was emotional abuse. At most, if it was consistent, I'd think he didn't give a shit.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 06:16 PM
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Yeah, I believe you. I know more about most of my male friends than anyone else in their life and there's no sex involved. I can only imagine the shit underneath the shit I know. It's wild. Like, let it out fellas. It can't stay in. And if the person you tell doesn't take it how you pictured, doesn't mean stop talking.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 06:14 PM
2

Damn. That's horrid. I'm so sorry for him and you and what he did to you and what was done to him. But yeah, look, I can be irritated or upset with men all day too. But this is clearly extreme pain they're in. This isn't like someone overreacting to being called a slur. This is like, no one talks like this that isn't experiencing a pretty consistent pain or extreme trauma.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 05:07 PM
9

I'm sorry we've dated the sameish man and for sort of the same reasons (I didn't have alcoholism, but, being religiously indoctrinated and sexually assaulted creates more or less the same result). Yeah, they all reached out at some point to remind me of their existence. The last one I'd just gotten married so when I told him so I think that ended him ever bothering me again. But yeah, this rehab scheme for awkward men just isn't real. It's their fantasy, but it isn't real.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 05:04 PM
12

Oh sir madam, I'm stupid. I did this relationship 4 times. Please do not assume me to be someone who learns my lessons easily. I took if you're gonna be dumb you better be tough as a mission statement in dating. I've witnessed it happening at least 20 more.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 05:01 PM
12

None of these men were crazy incel deep end types. I wish they were. These were mildly awkward guys. Rehabilitation is not viable through the scenario you are suggesting.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 05:00 PM
41

Having been that angelic girl...nope. nein. Neit. Let me tell you what really happens. They become cripplingly insecure about losing you and their relative unworthiness. 2. They resent you for your perceived angelic superiority and their inferiority. 3. They grow in their controlling behavior. They become borderline emotionally abusive in terms of their consistent degradation, attacks, verbal cruelty, insults, and finding fault. Everything is about making sure you're beneath them and that you kn…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 03:44 PM
2

You don't wish to speak, I'm agreeing you are not useful to speak to due to a projecting, assuming, inability to read, and lack of emotional intelligence. Clearly, you have some trauma here around people saying that line. I'm sorry you haven't resolved it and let it destroy conversations. I was suggesting almost everyone has experienced people making them feel unattractive in a consistent way. That's what I'm not unique meant. I was suggesting this is not about seeking pity, but rather explainin…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 03:36 PM
2

I think everyone experiences and probably most of us have done it to someone else. And the thing you're supposed to learn is to not do it.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 03:15 PM
2

Reading comprehension not your thing either. I said I was not unique. Let's do better, sweetie on all the fronts.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 03:09 PM
1

Your replies come off as emotionally incompetent so it is probably best we do not speak.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 03:06 PM
3

Agreed. I also wish more of their hurt turned to compassion for others.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 03:04 PM
2

These women have all had other options. It may shock you, but they actually adore these men. Love is more complex than people here think. Hotter women want hotter men. The politics isn't the point, just like it wasn't for the bridge trolls. I'm not surprised. Dating happens even ones you realize aren't a perfect match. Not shocking to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 02:31 PM
6

Pain motivates us all differently. Those men are becoming that extreme due to the pain never finding an outlet. I'm not pretending I'm unique, yes, men are often awful to all sorts of women of all sorts of sizes and walks. The threats and stalking and harassment are the anger. They're also the cry for help. This is vengeance. Vengeance is caused by pain which is then made anger which if there's no outlet becomes rage and vengeance. I'm not condoning this behavior either. I'm saying they aren't o…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 01:53 PM
11

You confuse not wanting to mother someone with not wanting to nurture. And I present to you the difference: a child, especially a baby is entirely dependent upon you. It lives and dies based on your nurturing, it requires your attention body and soul to persist and exist. Which is beautiful because it is genuinely helpless without you and should be. The need is genuine. I'm sorry if any person did not experience the all sacrificing love of a mother. Genuinely, that sucks. But it is not the place…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 01:47 PM
18

It's not offense. It's hurt. Different emotional frames sort of. I'm a skinny minny flat chested gal. And let me tell you, men may say they just like the ones they get to touch, but from 16-22 that was not the messaging I received. Men constantly made fun of me for being a boy, a skeleton, a pancake, I must have an eating disorder (I didn't, I was always a healthy weight, just a more naturally elfish body type). Guys who were interested in me got made fun of or teased for it and there were some …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 12:58 PM
3

About as attractive as the men they're dating. Slightly prettier at best. By my estimation, the dough boys are with dough girls the emo twinks are with emo twinkettes. I find none of them attractive. But importantly, I don't have to. They like each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 12:48 PM
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Given you don't even have the energy to write your own hateful rant, I am not surprised the process of finding the love of your life seems like a burdensome humiliation ritual. Is there anything worth the effort to you?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 11:38 AM
–

She has a song with Robert Smith from the Cure. And the people that got me into Love Island were men. This isn't about what is actually critically interesting nor artistic. He isn't looking like one. He is one. A significant amount of men here are so myopic and insulated in their ivory towers with just a dash of misogyny they literally cannot fathom dating someone that likes things they don't. The idea of actually taking an interest in what women popularly like is that verboten to them. And we w…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 11:33 AM
0

I basically agree although I want to say as a young woman you don't quite have this categorized insight down pat yet. You just have an internal dread near some men and not others. You have a feeling you could ask them your middle name and they wouldn't know even if you'd just told. Now, is this a perfect system ever? No. But you are onto something. I think the problem for let's say desperate and inexperienced men is they really do just want to date and fuck...it has yet to become deeper.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 03:41 AM
1

2 & 3 interspersed with us giggling at whatever we had on television whenever we started.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 03:31 AM
1

Yeah, I think fundamentally you have to imagine most women walk around being indirect and not saying what they think directly...like all day long. And it's exhausting and it's caused by not trusting nor respecting the people around us in very different ways. The fact we talk to our beloved men more directly is the sign we often trust and respect them and are at peace. Men by contrast have a tendency (at least that I perceive) of walking around all day saying exactly what they think directly. So …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 03:29 AM
1

I think the lingering small asks thing is just relationship stuff, honestly. You're describing what is essentially a bid for attention - take care of me being the particular brand. I can agree this is a more feminine bid style. But, my experience is men are just as likely to bid for attention, but they sort of do what I call the "look at something cool I did and praise me". And this doesn't seem like an imposition to men in the same vein in part because all the woman is being asked to do is come…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 02:59 AM
13

Nope. Interacting can change that, but just pure gawking. Nope. And usually I don't imagine sex. I imagine a kiss or wanting to see their smile.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 12:21 AM
1

That has not been my experience, I think men are just more prone to seeing this as an unreasonable imposition than women are likely to. I also think men leave things go more generally (I'm a bad example on this, I'm the more chaotic and easy going one between me and my husband so I'm leaving things go more often). The script you mention is basically: hur dur I ignorant stupid man cannot see overflowing trash and children in need of food. Enter nagging woman who demands this be fixed immediately.…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 12:19 AM
3

I kinda think this is an improvement. I mean divorce is down drastically among Millenials, we're taking longer to find our person, but it's successful when we do. That's not a bad thing. And, those who don't find someone tend to find fulfillment in other ways. Which is great too. I don't truly think things have gotten more extreme, I think it's just more normal to discuss and for tribes to keep to themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 11:07 PM
1

The problem here is you're not independent if you're in a cohabitation style romance. You have that up for other benefits. If it's not worth it to you, don't obviously, but, yeah. I think is the root of the problem, your time IS now loomed upon. And trust me, this is something as a married woman who is naturally pretty wild and independent, I'm still working on and getting used to.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 08:22 PM
2

Periods are wild. It's not your fault you don't have one. Before mine the smell of onions and fish is revolting to me. Guess what my favorite foods are the other 3 weeks a month. Yeah, fish and onions. I go from eating about 3 meals to 5. And as a healthy eater I suddenly crave like absolute bottom of the barrel garbage and it tastes like heaven to me. A Lunchables near my period is like caviar of the highest order. I also despise chocolate...except during my period. Suddenly I feel like I may c…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 08:12 PM
1

Scientists study all kind of things that are fucking stupid. My best friend is a top scientist at Columbia labs. He'll be the first to tell you the amount of wasted stupid research happening because it's one peculiar, but important researcher's interest.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 08:09 PM
15

All the most liberal women I know, and I know some real doozies, are married or in relationships with equally liberal men who I, uh, as a conservative woman married to a conservative man, would not describe as masculine in the slightest 🤣 They're all big doughie boys or emo twinks. I'm more masculine in temperament and hobbies than them and I'm a 5 foot tall youthful extremely feminine looking gal. The reality is, you just weren't their person. And that's ok.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 06:51 PM
5

Ok.... Just so long as we're done letting the abusers and rapists off the hook. And so long as we no longer have any sympathy ever under any circumstances for men that cannot attract women. And no more for autistic people either. That's out the window. And if they complain, no more voting!
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 01:15 PM
1

When I ask for something I give the expectation and time frame. "Hey, if you get the chance, it would really help me if you do x" = this isn't a set in stone demand and you have all day to accomplish it. Compare this with: "could you take out the trash?" = right now and this is phrased as a request, but it's really not one. All requests or demands being turned down depend on the how and the why. You can say no if you have a good reason to be saying no like that you're working on other things or …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 01:13 PM
2

I can be pro eating oreos (I am) and also think if you ate 600 in a sitting or exclusively ate only oreos that this is outrageous behavior and not what my pro oreo stance was originally about when I thought of it. And, I can also continue to be pro oreos and not want oreos banned or heavily regulated even while Bonnie Oreo and Clavicoreo roam the Earth taking the Oreo thing way too far. See the thing is, eating ores is natural. And eating too many ores or only oreos may also be natural. Someone …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 05:13 AM
1

Losers back home aren't looking for genuine desire...they're looking for a financial, cultural, and social imbalance to exploit...which they wouldn't need if they were genuinely desirable in the slightest.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 04:05 AM
1

I pick outfits every day and all the women I know do. I also watch many a movie sometimes I like them, sometimes I don't. Dinner, I get through the trial of having a thing I want or a thing I want every day multiple times a day. And I've maintained consistent fitness and diet while trying some variations... Perhaps you think curiosity or trying things out is a bad thing. For me, I knew what I wanted: the love of my life. Finding him took a little monkeying re specing, and trying things out. But …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 04:04 AM
2

Oh no, they discovered Katinka. Pack it in, ladies. The men finally have the touchstone proof we....only learn to give good blow jobs for espionage. Frankly....I wish this was true. This would be much much cooler. I changed my mind, light the flame of Gondor. The council of cunts must meet and consider a new agreement not to give blow jobs outside of espionage.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 03:39 AM
1

No. I would not use it here or there. I would not use it anywhere. I do not like dating apps. I do not like them, Sam I Am.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 03:36 AM
2

It really depends on so much of the why and how cut the family ties are. And how much even gone they messed their kid up. I'm thinking of guys I knew that had parents who were heroin addicts, guys who came from outrageous dysfunctional wealth, some that came from really really, I mean crazy messy divorces, not garden variety divorce, the kind Shakespeare would have written his tragedies about if they'd been happening in his time. And people that come from cultures wildly different than my own. A…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 03:34 AM
1

It is when there's a pre established activity people are there for that you don't give a shit about. And it especially is when it gets in the way of the activity (which for people that don't give a shit it almost always does). Men always think it's about not being hot enough because somehow that's easier to deal with than a lack of social skills and being a poser.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 02:32 AM
1

Seduction is by definition active and aware. It's not just being attractive or pleasant.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 01:57 AM
2

Guess I'll go tell my husband to stop seducing me all the time because it's my job....you don't happen to have a video as to how I could learn seduction because my only real seductive move is to wear his shirt and cheeky panties...and what if that stops working?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 01:26 AM
10

All the guys I didn't want to date, but was friends with fit one or more of the following: Were ugly Were very self destructive Had tedious personality elements that made them good for a few hours at most of interaction Came from families I wouldn't have joined for the world Had no real prospects Values didn't match They were funny and flirting, I just wasn't going there with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 01:22 AM
1

I met my husband through hobby. A hobby we were both super into. We also talked during downtime or social times. I'm not against the genders sharing hobbies or space. But I've been on the end of guys that aren't there from even mild curiosity and they're just pests and most of the women (not all, note, there are women who don't care about the hobby either) just want the men out of our hair because it's just gross behavior and disrespectful. And, I've never seen it lead these men to success. Sure…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 12:16 AM
2

O o there's so much in this post I can't even. I can not even. Here's hoping there's some sort of watch lists for such as you.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 11:58 PM
1

I've only ever dated dudes just living their lives and me just living my life. You know who is obnoxious and I generally avoid and recommend other women avoid: Men who come to hobbies and activities to date. It's super obvious, very difficult to hide, and egregious. It is not bad advice to say live your life unless the way you live your life does not include the opportunity to meet people of the opposite gender. But the next step is not to just join hobbies with girls. It's to examine your inter…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 07:04 PM
0

As someone that dated guys I wasn't attracted to, it wasn't for comfort nor stability: it was curiosity, and then hope that attraction would develop. And I need to emphasize, this was caused chiefly by a religious background which heavily diminished female desire. This is not most women. Most women are horrified rightly when I tell them of this.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 06:08 PM
1

Take it from someone happily married...and I'm the low standard dirty disorganized chaos goblin: If you approach your relationship as if your standards are separate and should thus default to a "do it yourself cuz I'm fine" mindset you are unloving, selfish, and resisting the call to be better and act for the benefit of the person you claim to love and the connection you claim to want. I work like the dickens to make sure my husband is happy cohabitating. And in return he does his best not too b…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 05:46 PM
-2

I think you can be a little more fair: A lot aren't complaining about 6 months, but typically decades or more of this. 2. Yes, women as a whole are the more resilient gender starting literally in utero and moving forward. And this is pretty well documented. A lot of these dudes have autism of some stripe so, you know I think we can have a little sympathy that they essentially have brain damage on exactly the emotional regulation topic. Women have been taught this whereas well, most boys and men …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 02:59 AM
2

Validation is one of the easiest and stupidest things to find and it's everywhere online. Who is validating you and what is the validated thing is massive. And if you're finding validation from men who compare moving a box to sex, that should worry you.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 02:52 AM
2

Uh huh. But the other men there is. It lets them feel vindicated on nonsense. I'm wondering at this point if you can read, honestly. I am telling you don't go down this bullshit victim path, which implies you haven't yet, but that you're on the brink. No, I'm saying you are comparing apples to aardvarks. Is what healthy? Asking people to do things and then judging them based on their answer and values? Yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 12:34 AM
2

It's not respected because it's non-existent on that front, dude. Someone asking you to do something which requires your body is not disrespectful, someone being upset you didn't is not disrespectful, and other people agreeing you're kind of an ass for how you decide to use your body and the values that inform it is also not disrespectful. Yes, I am sure men here are seeking a kind of victimhood that in no way pertains to someone that barely knows them asking them to lift water onto the grocery …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 11:57 PM
2

Yeah, I know, I addressed this. Her interest in you is almost entirely irrelevant to your mindset. Your mindset is very transactional and selfish. It's not entitlement to think you should help random people you kind of know do things that are relatively easy to do. It's just a different mindset. And look, I do not exempt anyone from this. I'm all of 105 pounds and I've helped people move house. Sure, I'm not the most for heavy lifting, but I can pack, I can unpack, and I can carry medium to smal…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 11:51 PM
2

Yeah, I mean, I can't tell you how many people my husband and I have helped independently and together that weren't very close to us, we hardly knew, or we didn't know just because it seemed like the right or a nice thing to do. And I'm not even saying go super out of your way and become a saint. But like, if you had nothing going on the day this random girl needed help that you kinda knew from a few dates, knew isn't gonna murder you, why not show up just for the lark of it. Do something nice f…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 11:46 PM
20

I'm a squat little idiot female and I've helped multiple people move house in my community. It's just a nice thing to do and you kind of hope the universe pays you back someday one way or another.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 07:34 PM
3

I think you're way overcomplicating it on several fronts: Firstly, to compare being asked to help someone move to sex is just not intellectually honest. It's something I've helped people with and would help most people I knew at all even slightly well or saw some kind of future connection with. Sex is just a different ball game entirely and I think we all know it and every time men bring up lifting a case of water or a dresser with the same "how dare I be used for my body" tone, I personally rol…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 07:32 PM
5

There's such a thing for sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 01:43 PM
3

I assume you're being silly or really dislike plastic surgery. She's clearly quite hot and good looking. I can't imagine comparing that dude to her.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 01:43 PM
4

He's just not anything to turn your head as the OP seems to suggest. He's meh.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 11:35 PM
8

I wouldn't call him handsome. I'd say kinda generic black man, slightly below average even. He seems decently well spoken, can't say I found him particularly socially intelligent or he'd know most women don't do "playtime" and yes, I am saying that word with derision.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 07:19 PM
0

Editorial you, honestly.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 07:11 PM
2

AHHAHHHHA! Ok. Sorry, I'm used to people being horrified that 12-13 year olds are interested in dating and romance stuff. So I was like...no this is quite normal at their age and it's a good time to start talking about this stuff because a lot of the boys especially don't realize they can now harm their female friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 05:09 PM
9

Most 12-13 year olds are hitting puberty and care about dating and how the opposite sex sees them to an increasing extent. And they all want to grow up and be adults. It's actually pretty normal and natural. They're all having their first little girlfriends and boyfriends. Some of the precocious and bad home situations will consider early sexuality stuff, and the unchosen develop complexes starting at that point They also are importantly at an age where gender dimorphism is causing them to have …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 04:00 PM
5

If it feels uncomfortable for you to do, there's really about two reasons: You have some anxiety you are working through and good for you, but also that's all in your head. And it's good you're working on it because that's the only way out. The other person is not keen to your advances and you are being pushy in order to either follow the social script or try to get what you want. And you should feel uncomfortable because the social script assumes she's interested and pushing for what you want a…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 03:50 PM
8

I'd start sooner than high school. My middle schoolers are caring about this stuff by 7th grade.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 03:42 PM
1

It's kind of hard to determine because you're making a value judgement about the impact of words. . Cheating is basically a known value of evil. But you know words can lead to violence, self harm, suicide, lost hope, creating a culture of hatred or fear, etc. It can also create a culture of hopelessness. And it's like, well in isolation it's unlikely to be as impactful, but also not impossible that's gonna be someone's 13th reason. But together, you know it can do quite dark things. Like, I most…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 04:13 AM
–

I can't say I've met many women who see their husbands as a lower standard...or that feel in their aging dating their standards are going down. Quite the opposite.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 04:05 AM
22

I'm happily married now, but before I met my husband: Appearance, character, how shallow their masculinity was. Their demands were...frightening and outlandish. Their boundaries seemed almost designed to drive away connection, but then they seemed shocked when I got to scooting. The provider thing never entered my head. What was I expecting? Good looks, charming, depth, security, and someone that cared about my comfort and prioritized maintaining the connection and joy and treating me well. I do…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 04:02 AM
4

Let's put it this way: everything depends what you value. It is entirely possible to live on one income even now and do the home maker provider thing... But you will likely almost never ever eat out, your meals will be simple, you'll have to work a lot of hours, you'll have to be very very wise with your spending. And for some people that's what they value and want especially if kids are in the mix. But, most of us want a vacation, eating out semi regularly, buying dumb shit, working 40-50 hours…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 03:06 AM
–

Ok. I guess we just don't see this the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 01:08 AM
2

Maybe. Again, I'm big on don't explain with malice what you can with stupidity.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 05:53 PM
4

I think it's that and a lot of people are young, dumb, not ready for that kind of full on commitment, having fun, being reckless. And so much of this damage can be solved by clearer communication, but, guess what young dumb people are also bad at. And thus, I think everyone needs to take this only as serious as it requires to learn the important lessons.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 03:41 PM
–

I hate to say this because I think a lot of men just disagree in their bones, but there's just seasons of life where the conditions are what they are. You're both working a lot, newborns, disconnection, the spark is a little lost, etc. You can't just work your way through some of these, you just need to endure without building resentments and it seems like a lot of men can't just let that season of life go without trying to fight it tooth and nail in ways that permanently damages the connection.…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 03:40 PM
–

It really doesn't unless you're maintaining two minds that women should both be excited for random indiscriminate male advances unless you care about them. And yeah, the only reason you'd take that mild disgust badly is if you were a little steeped in some kind of wonky thought process sometimes referenced under toxic masculinity or one too many manosphere podcasts. Because clearly you all prefer it when it comes to your mother or sister. You are being a creep and it's ok to feel ashamed about b…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 02:15 PM
–

Or, and this is just a game theory: Sex sometimes is a chore, especially if your partner is often asking for sex when you're tired, overstimulated, having a bad day, etc. (I adore sex with my partner, but I've had chore sex once and had to swear never again because it was that bad and he takes being turned down very well. I can't imagine how this goes for the guys that don't. It's not a chore if you don't make it one for her.) So that's why you hear about it. Not cuz there's some Nice Girls out …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 02:09 PM
–

I cannot imagine it is any worse than dating a gender with an in built indiscriminate lust. I also think it's very strange if men did not want women to feel this way that our brothers, uncles, fathers, and really any man whom genuinely cares for us warns us off men and tells us how dangerous they are and that they do not really care for us and just want to fuck us and use us..... It's almost like you want women to have mild disgust for men....but only if you care about us.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 01:11 PM
0

It's difficult to like strangers when you fear them. Simple as.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 01:04 PM
1

Yes, and I'm saying they aren't because they cannot build nor sustain the connection.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 01:02 PM
2

Not at all, it's not even really a relationship. You're basically saying realistically don't expect anything from your partner. Like...then they would never become my partner. Yeah, again, if they can barely clear bottom of the barrel almost definitive to connection elements they won't be a partner, let alone appreciated. The gay guys I know, and I've known my share, wouldn't even accept this low a standard.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 03:57 AM
1

Yeah, which is funny because it assumes a lot of us were fucking as teenagers...which I can't say nearly describes most of us. Frankly, I suspect if women were fully honest, you'd find more of them having their first sexual experiences in the latter half of college. So they're basically angry they didn't get the few precocious teenagers.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 03:54 AM
3

Wait, you think it's realistic to expect to watch porn, have few if any romantic expectations, live in strange ways, and few labor expectations.... Cuz I gotta tell ya, sure, gay guys may be cool with porn, but otherwise they aren't out here spending much time with lackluster, low romance, weird living men. And labor, don't even get me started. They hold their men to way higher standards than we do cuz they have no room in their heart for carrying a dead weight man. And no, you can't compare bar…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 03:50 AM
7

I'm sorry, but I've seen way too much of women (myself included) care taking men in ways that lead to the demise of their dreams, joy, career, and leaves them closer to the walking dead than if they spattered themselves in dirt and fake blood. Women sacrifice themselves all the time for the men in their lives. And love men who are not ambitious and capable regularly. This is an unhealthy dynamic no matter how you slice it and speaking of, plenty of men love their women as more than puppies to be…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 03:35 AM
–

No, it's not. You just don't like it. Tbf, this doesn't work on all of us, but some number are clearly impressed. For most of us, it's just a perk. And why? Cuz that's an easy lifestyle to want to be part of.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 02:09 AM
4

90% at least?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 02:07 AM
–

All the women I have ever known always knew they wanted marriage and kids someday with the right man. Some weren't ready for that to start given educational demands or career ambitions or such. But they always knew someday, if you catch my drift. I don't think there's a lot of women who are like waking up at 30 suddenly going "wait, I've suddenly decided I do want kids and a husband". I'm sure it happens, don't get me wrong. But I think it's far more likely that's the age everyone feels stable a…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 02:06 AM
–

O_O Ew. you got some fucked up shit in there, huh? I'm not a child and I don't look like a child. A child does not have this ass and never did. Yeah, it is. I dunno what to tell you. My father is 6'3, my brothers are 6'2 and 6'1 and 6'2. I got the short end of the gene pool on that one. Your understanding of genetics is interesting.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 04:07 PM
–

Yeah, I wasn't even gonna go there although I totally agree with you. Why put down how other women interact with the rules of their society? I'm fine with women who marry for materialistic reasons and hopefully find some kind of affection later. I'm also fine with women who marry for affection and hope the materialistic reality matches up. But it does amuse me how often men idealize a non-wester woman as more submissive or likely to accept a raw deal when I've known so many of them and it's like…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 04:05 PM
3

Personally, I think everyone could do with a bit more of a Spartan attitude including women. But, that wouldn't be male exclusive. I can't tell you as a strong woman how often listening to women around me just leads to the biggest internal eye-roll. Women used to defend our households, raise children, set a standard of strength and grit that regardless of if dad was alive, dead, or MIA outlined for children that acts of will are better than weeping. You wanted to cry, you kept it in bed with you…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 04:02 PM
–

Yes, I did in fact get that impression from reading what you wrote. Either that or you were a middle schooler. Which is totally fine. But, one does wonder if your time is being well spent to suggest western women are worse when you haven't you know, been around that many of us to compare. Do they take the ramblings of the bitter and insane seriously in your country because I thought it was fairly universal to ignore those types regardless of gender.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 03:52 PM
–

Lmao. He's the shortest man I've ever been with. Your girl had all the 6+ foot dudes chasing and ready to marry. I ain't here to be bragging, but I'm considered extremely good-looking by the majority of people with girl next door bubbly vibes on top. Don't get me wrong, I think I lucked out extremely with my husband, but not because of our height difference. That never even entered my mind. The men in my family are very very tall, I just so happened to take after my mother's side on that front (…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 03:48 PM
–

We wish all the Western men well in their journey to finding their non western queen and living with her abroad. Just be sure not to add water or bring her back home where she may suddenly catch our Western values and standards. Do I actually think we're worse. No, that's what you'd see here in the west too if the men here could manage to take the bitter goggles off. I'm 5 foot, my husband is 5'8. We're both, I would say, similarly very attractive people, but if you had to break it down, I have …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 02:23 PM
2

Are you unaware what relative means? God bless and good luck. Hope that works out for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 12:20 AM
11

It's like seeing my parents' marriage in a paragraph. Like aren't you bored of the misery enough to repair yet? It has been 40 years!!!!
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 10:43 PM
2

I mean that if there's a violent crime it's overwhelmingly likely it is a man committing it. And the fact you as a man are experiencing violence from men suggests that there is a problem with men committing violence. Now imagine, you were a woman, you'd be even more fucked and it sounds like you've been through it. *** I know you're not. So have a good day. But when the divorce or the "I'm just not interesting in settling down" comes, remember me. I told you why. Maybe you can tell her about the…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 10:16 PM
2

So you're agreeing that you were assaulted by men and did not deserve it and are a man...cool, we agree. *** Because every single woman I know regardless of culture or socioeconomic status or political affiliation has stories like mine and none of the men do. So a person within a relationship has expectations of what you should be doing...great. I'm talking about people outside of my relationship thinking I should be my husband's personal assistant, cook, maid, and office manager. But even if we…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 08:53 PM
8

I'm a huge proponent of getting married, I'm not a huge proponent of staying in financially abusive relationships in which the image given to children is dysfunction and a lack of accountability. This isn't even about my happiness is the great thing, this is about the survival and thriving of my children. But, I would say happiness is important. My husband is the greatest thing that happened to me in my life, full stop. He makes it all better every day in big and small ways. But if he was making…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 05:33 PM
2

Text more often with deeper questions and then ask me out and then we keep asking each other out and making excuses to be together until eventually that magnetic thing happens where you kiss or hold hands at like the same time. And then if that keeps happening eventually we're direct about our feelings and what we want the relationship to be. And that's a pretty natural progression to me. As far as losing interest: cruelty to those beneath him or undeserving...mismatched values, sudden and extre…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 05:22 PM
–

No one wants to be seen as average by their partner or see their partner as average. And, I don't think women just "assume they have it". Although, let's be fair, we kinda do "just have it" comparatively. You can't give dick away. Everything we do is a reflection of who we are. You planning a lame date and her judging you for it and looking pretty. I mean, if you were trying to impress someone and you failed...that's what we call a failure usually. You can think of yourself any way you want, the…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 04:06 AM
1

I'd ask those women, honestly. I think being the penetrated one alters a lot of this, if I'm being honest. One of you is creating the force and friction and angle, etc. The other is having those things created for them.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 03:20 AM
6

A bad argument doesn't make something untrue, merely poorly argued. People confuse good arguments with truth far too often. I am a cypher wrapped inside an enigma with a mirror glaze.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 03:17 AM
3

There's a difference between discerning for flaws and hunting for them so you can dismiss having to consider if something is true or not. And I would say anyone who is likely to sling the word fallacious is the latter, not the former. After all, as I've suggested, it does not influence the actual truth factor. So if someone is concerned with truth, fallacies are essentially irrelevant. So the only reason someone would bring them up if we're debating truth is if they are not concerned with truth …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 02:12 AM
1

I heard similar as a little girl or was told I was being unreasonable, crazy, difficult, etc. I think it's actually extremely common for parents to minimize emotions or try to shut them down regardless of gender. And, if we can cut parents a small slack for this....well, anyone who has been near a kid can admit they are trash pandas with their emotions. The worst. Not saying it's the totally right approach, but if you've never gone day in and day out with kids throwing fits over the stupidest th…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 01:45 AM
10

Problematically, this is irrelevant. Fallacious reasoning doesn't impact the capital t truth element of any statement. It only renders it logically unsound. Which if you care about debate format or believe debate format is the best way to arrive at the truth is relevant.... But I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say most of us don't care about debate format. And I'll go a step further towards peril and say debate may, indeed, be among the worst ways to arrive at the truth of any given matter. A…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 01:33 AM
2

You know there's more violence to fear than intimate partner violence, right? Dating is the context of a lot of murder between people who are not domestically attached...and lord knows how much more would happen if women didn't fear actually speaking and acting their minds. Probably a lot more, but instead when men intimidate and threaten us or are imposing, we typically fawn.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 09:52 PM
2

Uh huh. I don't think you think that's a good faith response, sir. Men experience violence from other men is their problem in the overwhelming majority of cases. If your point is everyone should fear men, you'll get no debate from me. But I don't think you thought that was what I meant. Oh yawn, another stat bro. Let me put it to you like this, stat vulture: no one has ever thought any man I dated should be prompting me to buy my mother a birthday present. Or expected him to host a blessed thing…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 09:50 PM
1

Preaching
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 09:43 PM
14

The relative lack of danger The relative respect received The relative lack of expectations by extended family The relative treatment of emotions as valid indicators of distress The reduced married and family life expectations The reduced appearance expectations (admittedly this is changing). The real lack of unpleasant sexual expectations. The reduced amount of double binds, I suppose. Pregnancy.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 05:42 PM
–

Hard pass and an ew. I'm 32 and if god forbid something happened to my husband, I'm not sure I'd still want to date a single dad and it's still much more likely than not given my age. I may choose single over someone else's mess.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 05:35 PM
6

It's fun. Speaking as a native to male spaces myself, it also often exposure therapy cures you of any of the associated pain, which is nice and feels very liberating. I used to hang out in a group of fellas where I had a disability, another dude was hit by a truck and in a wheelchair, two had autism. We'd mock each other relentlessly for our disability, but it came from a really good place of love and acceptance. For some of us the first We'd got in our life. Because we knew other people thought…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 12:17 PM
5

I encourage warm approach or being a regular so that you're striking up a conversation with someone you kind of know or have kind of seen around and someone that has given indication they're interested. I'm also a personal fan of out loud commentary that invites others to converse with you or offers an opening basically. This takes practice, and you may fuck it up a lot. Deal with the consequences of fucking up. That's life and it's the only way to get better. Personally, if you're in a bar with…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 04:31 AM
3

I mean, I basically think you clocked a lot of men here that they don't want to socialize out of highly insular low effort comfort zones... But, I will say I was not a big bar nor club goer outside of some random intervals mostly caused by loving my siblings and friends. I think the more accurate version of this is that you need to be leaving your house to go to a fun group activity which attracts both genders and being a regular places where you could talk to others. And the problem is that sch…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 04:07 AM
–

Most people at bars are there to socialize and form community. The drinking is the excuse. Form a relationship and the overwhelming majority will fall of the map and into a relationship and then a more intimate circle. In other words, and look, I didn't date that many bar goers, I chose men destroying their lives with video games and atheist reddits, but I was friends with many bar goers, they aren't lifers to the bar. They're searching for something and when they find it they leave the bar. No …
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 03:45 AM
1

I think so, a big part of it is they talk about class and beauty, not being hot or sexy so much. The way they talk is more "I want to run away to Rome with you and paint you like a French girl" than "I'm thinking about you and my dick in the same room". And they seem so at ease and pleasant and concerned.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 03:42 AM
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Ok. I mean, I am married to a ten, so, I guess I can't disagree.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 02:33 AM
–

Ok, I can tell you I've seen some of my guy friends show up on dating profiles and they look terrible and I know they're handsome fellas irl. But if you insist you know better, let's assume you do.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 01:35 AM
–

...that's why they hold out, cuz most profiles do nothing for um. But in person lots more guys look good. Ok. Take issue with it. No one would be taking pity if he's good at chatter and making the place more fun for everyone. It's not even a lot of work.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 01:28 AM
–

Strange to assume you have to drink to be a barfly.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 01:26 AM
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Yeah, you can kind of tell when they're hugging the bartender and are on a first name basis with the staff. Plus, out of loyalty to a brother and a BFF, I've been a regular before. I'm the girl reading a novel in a bar to designated drive some other fools home. And when those days ended for me, I've known guys that frequented bars as friends outside of it. Don't get me wrong, some were fuckheads for sure, but a lot were just wild boys making some mistakes, but really good dudes deep down. I'm ol…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 09:23 PM
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Depends on the bar, I guess. Some are just cool hang outs and communities with trivia and so forth. I'm not a huge bar goer myself, but when I was dragged there by various loyalties in my personal life I had preferences for some that were more like a pub. Decent food, atmosphere where you can hang out, talk, play some games, etc. I met some guys that way that I'd have considered dating if they asked.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 07:46 PM
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I've always liked bartenders. It attracts cool people surprisingly with good stories and solid people reading skills. If they said someone was a chill customer I'd have taken it seriously as a rec. We just have to agree to disagree about looks. Mannerisms can ruin a person, but not how they look.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 07:43 PM
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The standards don't change...most men just look better in person and women are more attracted to a man in motion than a lifeless photograph. To say nothing of the fact most men suck at taking and picking good photos of themselves. Thus I do in fact recommend going out to meet folks, cold approach is terrible tho. Become a bar fly, a regular. Someone everyone including the bartender knows is a good time and pleasant. Makes it easier to talk to folks for more than that 30 seconds.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 07:30 PM
1

It's not evil. Just short sighted, foolish, and typically informed by deep emotional trauma that you will end up taking out on the people you love both ironically and tragically. And thus people appropriately avoid folks with this as their main stated goal.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 07:27 PM
1

SA shaped some elements of my sexuality certainly. Outside of that, my husband was my only partner so it's difficult to say. I feel like I like what I like and he does what I like and vice versa. If he were to god forbid not be with me anymore, I don't think I'd massively alter if I was with someone else? I imagine it would look different and the chemistry would be different...but I don't super imagine I'd suddenly be like, well, I'm not into that or time to try that
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 12:22 PM
1

This would be why I wasn't having sex. I also don't think it's that hard to figure out. If he's cool seeing you date other guys and cool watching you go, he doesn't care.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 12:15 PM
4

Anger is not a primary emotion. These men fear women and secondarily feel a sense of sadness brought on by this. And yes, I do actually think if they had the same reproductive and sexual power minus our discernment, they would settle down young and have children while also fucking a lot of hoes. Which, for the record, women really aren't doing statistically speaking. And while it may surprise you...it turns out women are also doing what is best for men. The divorce stat is at an all time low wit…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 04:41 AM
0

The only "situationships" I have personally experienced were during the early stages of courting where I was prepared to name the thing and make a commitment and they (generally due to a lack of sex as a first problem) were often playing games, being vague, randomly not communicating, doing the hot and cold thing, etc. As for why I was tolerant of it...well, yes, I did fancy them. I also tended to know them so their behavior seemed to make a lot of sense based on what I knew, and yes, I did thin…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 04:32 AM
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Here's another thought, a woman telling you what she wants is her telling you what to do even if you're making the choice. After all, if I tell my husband I don't know, just pick for me and he does...well he did what I told him. Telling me would be if he told me I don't know what I want and he'll just pick. And if he did that, I think I may just lock him out of the house with the 95 degrees and the mosquitos for a night. Similarly, if I tell you that I'd like to have a cute outfit picked for me …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 03:19 AM
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While I agree there's a at least surface level of similar hurt and pain...I don't think an objective consideration of these two scenarios yields them as similarly damaging. Yes, both are mourning a lost fantasy life. As someone else mentioned, would you rather be sexually assaulted or stolen from? I know the answer before I ask. More bluntly, would you rather a man (yes it has to be a man so you can include the concept of penetration, disease, and let's pretend pregnancy, and the sense of icky) …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 02:39 AM
2

Seriously, the most charmed I've ever in a million years been was by significantly older Italian and Arab Men. Gods alive. They are ugly as the day is long most of them, but I feel like they talk long enough even I may end up in some sort of May December situation trying to explain to my very angry parents why really I'm the one robbing the geriatric ward. Most of them aren't low status, they're popular community pillars given the being aces at social interactions. But boy do they have the gift …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 02:29 AM
3

Actually, I did have the option, but I wanted an extra attack in combat so I didn't use my feat for that.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 01:21 AM
2

Wouldn't give a fuck. My husband takes the stupidest photos of himself 😅 he looks like such a goon and they're terrible angles. They make him look so much less handsome than he is irl.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 11:42 PM
1

I do not think those are the men drawing ire. I could be wrong, but that has not been my impression. I'm now confused. You mean women looking for men with better jobs? I feel like you're jumping around a lot and I'm struggling to follow. I think anyone can hold out for anything they want and some wants are easier to fulfill than others, some are a bit contradictory, and basically you can criticize just about anything as unreasonable, but the person can still want it.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 11:18 PM
–

Seriously, I can get through about half a Caleb Hammer podcast just trying to shape these caterpillars into something divinely inspired.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 09:16 PM
5

It is not. Girls have their own methods of avoidance certainly, but they are more agreeable or likely to give you lip service effort. I think I'd put a lot of weight on socialization, but I'd probably place a healthy amount on biology as well. Yes, I think schools are structured to natural disadvantages. Boys are more disagreeable, seem to be more easily motivated by short term pleasure, have more social contaminants going for them on that front, and school is very stationary and not so much han…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 09:13 PM
4

I think they have been taught by culture that being a man is not listening to a woman. Especially an alpha man. Especially a leader of men. I don't think they're being childish assholes within that cultural context. They do have to knock it the fuck off if they want good relationships with women, but this isn't precisely immaturity.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 09:04 PM
5

I am not providing data for the observation boys are harder to deal with in the school system...because it is an observation. Not one any educator I know disagrees with, but I'm fine if you dismiss me under unfounded anecdote. I am giving an insight, people are free to dismiss it and I wish them well.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 09:02 PM
1

I couldn't say. I think most of the rage at men over single mothers is the truly monstrous way they talk about them. There's a very mature way to say you don't want to date a single parent...most men on the internet aren't even in the same stadium as that way of speaking. Well, I mean, off the top of my head since I'm not sure how we got here: people have to work. They don't have to have romantic interludes. But if you mean from the employer's perspective, having employed people in a past life: …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 09:01 PM
3

I'm not interested in having a vulturish stats debate in this particular case. I am sharing my insight as someone who has taught children all of all ages. If you wish to dismiss this as pure anecdote, I am fine with that and it will make no difference to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 08:57 PM
3

So, I agree when you get married, you are a single unit and everyone pulls together for the best outcome. With that said, the math is still real that if I didn't exist, my husband still works more hours and still has all the same domestic tasks, right? Same for me. But here's the problem. I work less hours and make the same as my husband. And I have the same amount of domestic chores as him needing done. But I have more time. So I do more of the domestic chores. Cuz I love him. Obviously. But if…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 06:17 PM
–

Oh it's me, your bare faced lady friends with many bare faced lady. I say this with so much love, but unless she looks like a drag queen, men can't spot make up or self-care. Us bare faced ladies usually have a skincare routine that would knock your socks right off the "all natural" and hair removal routines to go with it and hair routines. My eyebrows are like the sistine chapel of effort, my hair itself, the Mona Lisa, and my skincare is the Eras Tour. This is about as unnatural as you can get…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 06:08 PM
1

It depends why the man is saying it. I don't think she's a dirty used up whore. If anything, my advice comes from a place of "step fathers and men not biologically related to the child are the most likely to be their sexual abusers". So my first problem isn't with her ultimately. I have other problems about poor judgement. I don't see how jobs enter this picture. If anything, I would tell such a woman to focus on her career and pull her family out of this by her own strength of will. You hope we…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 05:42 PM
6

I am not discussing grades. I'm discussing the ability to problem solve, critical thinking, and the ability to use disagreeability in task avoidance. See my comment to someone else.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 05:40 PM
9

So, in school there are many small tasks which are not at all interesting nor dopamine inducing. They are necessary, but boring. Boys will pretend to be helpless or may even genuinely feel that way in the face of these kinds of problems. Think having a pencil or figuring out what they're meant to be doing or a step in a task they could figure out, but it wouldn't be fun. In turn, they will quite naturally when prompted with it, go right for I don't know. Note, these are boys who can use you tube…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 05:39 PM
6

It could, but, I'm more specifically addressing a sort of helplessness towards tasks perceived as uninteresting and then when you attempt to address this behavior they're so aggressive, disagreeable, and difficult that there's a tendency to give up and just let them slide, get in a power struggle, or they genuinely run out the clock so to speak simply by being stubborn.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 05:32 PM
–

My man has jack shit to his name. I'm the one from means and financial intelligence. 🤣 My grandparents have hit the dying era and he's making out like a bandit between fishing gear, an extremely expensive lawnmower, and the list goes on. All of his are dead and he has some photos. I'm the one with the pension. Lmao. Y'all gotta stop your "we don't care who she is and what her job is" thing. Making Y'all date scrubs.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 02:09 PM
11

The more I teach, the more I see learned helplessness is particularly ingrained in boys because they are such maelstroms to deal with.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 01:58 PM
4

Relationships are long and people act somewhat differently as they get to know each other compared to when they're say 6 months settling into a relationship. He's mended since then and listens well, but there was a rough patch for sure and it was lucky I'd learned from previous relationships how to finally handle it without it wrecking the connection. I give good directions and offer resources with any advice I'm genuinely giving in my life. I think you are underrating the degree to which men do…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 01:18 PM
6

I don't think you can misunderstand almost every man you've ever met. This is a common theme and it is one most women experience consistently.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 12:56 PM
13

I listed many things they like. Just extrapolate from the dislike and you get what they like. But it sounds much worse if I say it that way, but I can do it for you: Men like women to be their admiring inferiors in almost every possible way and also like them to never need anything except to the degree it serves his ego without challenging it.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 04:52 AM
11

Those women learned from other men and assume you are the same. Took me awhile to realize my husband wasn't. Or you are the same, I don't know you. But if I had a nickel for every man that told me he was totally capable of handling me "reading him" and "being honest", I'd have at least a good milkshake worth of change. I mean, it's difficult to entirely articulate, but they're not good at listening to anyone unless they've determined near immediate gratification or value is happening...and they'…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 04:49 AM
3

I was being silly as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 04:03 AM
11

It has been my considered experience people never think this is the case and think I am wrong until they see it happening before their very eyes or think back with an open mind. And certainly, if they are a man, they never think it true of themselves, which is fine. But this has been my experience of men across sub cultures and ages. My husband isn't like this, partially why I married him. He has the same listening problem as most men, but he learned pretty quick when I let him fall on his face …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 04:02 AM
6

Don't listen to her, Ange, I did it and it has been awesome so far. Keep those standards high, expect great things from your fiance and give him great things!!! Go down with the ship a true queen of America.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 03:45 AM
16

I don't dislike men. The majority of my friends over time have been and are men. My husband is wonderful as are most of the men in my life. Broadly speaking: Boobs Ass Pussy Face Attached to a woman that is overly willing, easily accessed, agreeable, quiet, impressed by them, less competent, capable, and smart than them, but willing to dumbly nurture them and run all the elements of their life they do not like, but also unavailable enough other men can't have her while admiring her. And she shou…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 03:40 AM
1

Thank you!! I think a lot of us gals here would marry each other. I'm not gonna lie, I'd marry a lot of the women here platonically. That one professor martial artist nerd lady scientist is pretty cool here. This is why I can never take this question seriously. It's more interesting to ask people why someone wouldn't want to marry them. Just to see the self awareness.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 02:43 AM
13

My husband, yes. Outside of him, not really, no. I hate to say it, but I never needed to go looking. You are drowned in what men like, expect, and want from a pretty young age at least where I am from. And I can't say it was ever difficult to figure out even if I wasn't getting told it constantly and shown it constantly. Such is the fate of the second sex. Men have to ask and observe because they are not forced to learn so much and they're more disagreeable. Frankly, I don't think most try to di…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 02:40 AM
2

I'm a "whichever parent is most concerned with and capable of giving children a good lauch into life" type of person. And I always firmly hope that is both parents and that they can work out a good arrangement for the kids and their individual schedules. I also firmly think if you could not make it work with the other parent, it is time for lots of therapy and soul searching before you repeat this mistake and inflict more harm on your children and others. I also generically believe it is a very …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 02:21 AM
3

I unpopularly agree. I did not live with my husband prior to marriage. We took vacations together, so I knew I could wake up next to him. Where there struggles when we first moved in and compromises and learning? Yes. Are they still happening? Yes. The question of marriage is incredibly simple and not at all easy: do you vow to work with, change with, and compromise with this person come hell or high water? People who need to move in before marriage (and note, my brother was one of these for a v…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 06:12 PM
1

I mean a kid basically. Like that 16 to 24 range, most people haven't blossomed. They aren't anything. They're a long shot bet. And if you're on the wrong side of that 25+ you're failed to launch city. Even if you have a decent job, etc. You're now a bad bet. You may be mature at life, but you've got no relationship experience and there's 90% of the time a reason for that. And you aren't evil, but someone has to be a little silly to give you a shot because you're not a good bet. I didn't say not…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 02:33 AM
5

Lmao. Modern medicine doesn't come close to clearing pregnancy complications and it kills many of us to this day. Most women experience difficult pregnancies, pregnancy itself is difficult. I can't even with you. Divorce doesn't fall out of the sky and 50% hasn't been an accurate statistic in ages. It's an unfounded fear. Do better. And have the happiest 4th of July too!
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 02:26 AM
5

I'm confused. Your girlfriend broke up with you because she didn't want to be your first girlfriend? Isn't it too late for that if she's your girlfriend? I don't know how old you are, but I'm 32 and married. I started dating at 17 almost 18. I met my husband at 25 and we got married when I was 30. So I do have some perspective that's a little aged. The problem with dating anyone (guy or girl) who hasn't arrived is that you don't know who they're going to really become because nothing is set in s…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 06:49 PM
6

I think everyone is pretty equally allowed to distrust everyone especially on an individual scale. I'm constantly shocked by how much men won't distrust women and protect themselves or that when they do it's nuclear options instead of much lighter options. If you mean in internet arguments for fun...I dunno. I haven't been overwhelmed by the good faith of men here. And I also haven't been overwhelmed by the good faith of women here, we just happen to agree more often generically. As for projecti…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 06:32 PM
-1

I want to be treated differently than others because I'm his wife, girlfriend, beloved. How that happens may at times be dictated by being a woman (for example, being babied on my period). But the special treatment ain't cuz I'm a woman mostly. It's cuz I'm his lady. And he gets it too whether he's aware or not. If other men had pulled this shit my exs did they would not have been getting kissy face love bug empathy, a shin kick would be more appropriate.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 02:04 PM
1

Oh, I said that to hurt him in this scenario. He's supposed to feel small and emasculated because he went looking to and now I'm doubling down on his stupidity.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 01:59 PM
–

O.o you know she can choose to have it. So if you knew she was taken and you can easily confirm this and didn't notify the other dude, just as liable. Lmao. Yeah, women are the ones dodging responsibility for children and helping victims. That's us. I'm starting to change my mind since you won't consistently apply this and say there's no crime here. Immorality, sure, but crime. Nope!
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 05:33 AM
–

Most know. And if they do, why can't we prosecute and fine them too for participating in the paternity fraud? Whenever you fuck, you know it can end in kids. It's not yesteryear. You can look people up on social media and know if they're taken in the majority of cases.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 05:19 AM
–

Yeah, that's what I'm saying. You got me. I'm not discussing with someone who has zero good faith to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 04:28 AM
–

Clearly, I am talking about the bio dad. If you had an ounce of good faith you would know that. And he's sleeping with a taken woman presumably otherwise there's really no crime here beyond a woman what, not figuring out who the dad was using concrete thinking. Not a punishable one. If we start punishing that, I think most men will be in prison.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 04:28 AM
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That ain't the dad chief. That's the whole thing, right? It's not the same thing because mom is getting sent away while the dad the kid normally would end up with isn't the father and is being removed. No other crime fits this and doesn't include a realistic element of violence or easily repeated offense. Even calling it a crime is a little weird, but I'm going there with ya.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 04:01 AM
–

I don't think you believe that or you haven't heard of rape, murder, or torture then rape and murder. And kidnapping is there. Ritual abuse is there. This is bad, but it's so far from the most evil thing you can do that I'd go so far as to say it's not even top ten material.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 03:26 AM
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I said fines were fine. I don't see how prison makes sense or fits the crime in the first place and in the second, there's kids who need guardians. I don't think most women know they're committing paternity fraud as such. I imagine most cheat and then just kind of cross their fingers about it. Which is absolutely wrong, but not some big evil thing deserving of jail time. Again, fine it, make her pay the wrong man back, but making a child suffer like this is bad and not necessary.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 03:15 AM
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I'm cool with fines, but jail is ludicrous. Someone has to care for the child and finding the real dad ain't that easy. This is just fucking kids over for having a shitty mom and dad.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 02:41 AM
0

I don't think this is a must. 18-22 men can be much and offer much, many choose not to unfortunately..
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 02:40 AM
–

Yes, I do. And no, I don't particularly see this as entitlement. If I can help another person including men at low to light risk to myself, I do. And if say a child was in danger, I'd go up to high risk because that's where my capability is at. Men simply have more physical capability.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 02:39 AM
2

I mean, I'm married, but: I'm cute I'm fit I'm beautiful Good job Good finances Excellent cook Funny Interesting hobbies Have life goals Very positive can do attitude Never met a cat I didn't like Excellent taste in blankets Superior knowledge of health insurance Emotionally intelligent and solid Zero drama 16. From a solid, but slightly crazy family of decent means. Extremely respected in both my small communities and the local community. I'm 32 and I look 20 cuz of that vampire blood. You can …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 02:35 AM
7

I'm only accepting us calling them Losers Back Home. If you go somewhere because you truly love and value that culture, or end up adventuring, or military, bless you and the life and wife you find. But dudes going abroad purely to exploit their wealth and country of origin you deserve to have your life turned upside down when she figures it out or conned by one that already has.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 02:32 AM
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I've dated the most shy awkward men, they had simply relegated their aggression to the realm of words and ideas. And they'd say shit that would make you wish they'd just slapped you so that walking away would be easier. All men have a drive towards aggression and dominance. Some of them learn to control and wield it appropriately, I would not count on the shy awkward guy to be that. Unknown quantities are more volatile than known ones and much harder to avoid or mitigate until it's too late.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 05:55 PM
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Did most of these women know that their man was a prolific serial whateverer? Were these women also engaged in the prolific serial whateverering? Most didn't know. The ones that knew were doing it too. As for your rapist...he served his time, do you suspect he told that woman "and I'll do it again" or do you think he said he was redeemed? I'm going to tell you what I think is really going on beyond what I've already highlighted: an aggressive man is a known quantity. And women know all men are s…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 03:22 PM
1

I'll do you one better: They aren't necessarily unattractive nor broke, they're just isolating themselves or extremely awkward. Also, what lesliecarbone said.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 03:17 PM
1

While I'm certainly a proponent of waiting to have sex, I don't think sex influences the overall finding of a steady man, it simply eliminates dealing with the unsteady ones to a slightly higher degree. Your friend's problem isn't that she has sex with them, it is that her choices in the first place sound poor and then by offering sex easily, those men are less likely to eliminate themselves. But I've only had sex with one dude, and dated many many others from all different walks of life. Most w…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 03:16 PM
2

I'm a woman, and I like Taylor Swift, but, as my husband and I have discussed previously: we'd go to almost anyone's wedding. Love is so joyful to see and experience, it reminds you of your own special day, you get to eat and drink with people who are all in a good mood and look sexy. Why not? And you get the added benefit of making your girl happy? This is a no brainer.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 02:10 AM
1

Just because I've been watching landman: every romantic relationship you'll have will be a failure, until your last one Is this your last one? Cuz if it's not the last one, fuck it, try shit and figure out who you are what you really want.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 02:07 AM
0

Yeah. That's not enough. All the other kids do that shit and spend 8 hours a day together in a very particular environment with a very different set of rules. A few hours at chess club or sports or camp will not solve this. Your kid will have mild social retardation for life if you're lucky and likely endure incredibly difficult periods of isolation and be an easy mark for predatory and manipulative types forever. It can still be a fine choice, but there are very real costs you will never have t…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 12:34 AM
1

Speaking as a non religious homeschooler, it's bad and parents can pretend there's clubs or hobbies or sports and the neighbors, but you don't get the crash course in socialization they do, and they quickly find you weird, have better friends because they spend 8 hours a day together, and you're lonely and isolated anyway and spend most of your college years making up for this while still ending up socially retarded for the rest of your life in certain ways. It may still be worth it, but I'm not…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 12:31 AM
2

Do you care about loyalty in that way? Personally, the moment a dude asks me to open a relationship regardless of reasons, the relationship is over. But, I'm me. I don't care if you're in Alcatraz for ten years. Use your hand or lose me. If you don't feel that way, then you can go for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 12:25 AM
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I have, multiple times. I don't think it worked out. But I also don't think most guys are ugly. I just had a type there for a minute.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 12:21 AM
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I'm generically what they call an optimist and a hopeless romantic, so on those grounds alone I must protest. Secondly, I just don't agree really. If Clavicular and his ilk prove anything, it's that looks aren't the only thing that matters because most of them are perfectly fine looking young men who by all appearances should have been more than able to succeed with women. Their problems run a little deeper and I'm not saying that as some gotcha they're pure evil. Frankly, when I look at them, I…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 11:24 PM
3

I've only had men bring up sex once and again, he was a weirdo. Many men do discuss their dating woes, same as women, but it isn't sex centric. It's more like, you know dating woes centric: finding the right person, learning how and when to compromise, is this acceptable treatment, etc. But most of them it really isn't different than women. Family shit, friend shit, job shit, self-esteem, ego.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 07:30 PM
2

She sounds like a bad person? It also sounds like there was trouble in paradise already and that for whatever reason, as lovely as your friend is, he didn't make her feel seen and special despite his best efforts. Probably, it sounds like she's chasing thrills and highs and that's not something your friend was maintaining. (Not blaming, she sounds like a nightmare). The other guy did for whatever reason. It's likely if she dated him the thrill would expire eventually. Because this is a problem i…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 04:56 PM
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O.o have you wondered if you've got a type?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 04:51 PM
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I think the first is good, but semi generic and obvious. I also personally just find it dark spirited and evil in a way I cannot really abide. I think the second one is much more messy, but much more ambitious and artistic in how it depicts mental illness, how society exploits the pain of criminals and their victims, and it just doesn't let up at all in a way that makes the ending a surprise and slam dunk for me. Again, it's certainly more messy, but using musical numbers to show being divorced …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 02:07 AM
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Then I've got no outs left for you other than you just can't read a scene or a movie.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 09:28 PM
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I don't care if you talked about things or not, dude. If you see that scene as seduction your film IQ isn't very high and I wish you luck. Apparently you've done something for four decades badly. Many such cases. People like you couldn't comprehend the art to destroy it. I astonish many. It's a fantastic film. Either that or you need to watch it again, maybe you just don't remember what you watched.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 08:55 PM
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It was a copy and paste, dude. Enjoy the report for just being a dick needlessly.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 07:17 PM
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O_O I've got nothing. I'm going to put this scene here for anyone that thinks this is seduction: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G56TRBUNkq4 If a man can't see this as rape, I've got nothing, I hope they lock him up and throw away the key because it is so obnoxiously clear that it is Lynch's intent to depict not even a coercive rape scene, just a rape scene. It is not showing an "in love" girl be seduced, it's showing a terrified victim.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 07:16 PM
1

Yes. Yes. No, I don't think I'd be happier as a man, but I'm a very happily married woman and my husband is not gay so....You know if he was a woman and I was a man, I guess maybe I'd be happier in certain ways? But I do actually enjoy being a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 07:01 PM
–

While Sailor is changing their car's oil, Lula waits for him in the motel room. Peru enters the room, deduces Lula's pregnancy and proceeds to intimidate, grope and violently coerce her into asking him for sex; when she finally does, he mockingly reveals his threats to be a bluff) and leaves. This traumatizes Lula, who was previously raped as a child. I don't know how anyone saw seduction in that scene, but you're making me think now that maybe they won't get what they are meant to from that sce…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 07:00 PM
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Agreed. I watch it once a year near Christmas and it is just the most gorgeous and lush film and so thoughtful and beautiful. It makes me glad to be alive.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 06:58 PM
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I agree. But, I don't think Pride & Prejudice or Little Women are on that list
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 06:39 PM
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Probably is since I'm just seeing flirting since I don't think he thinks he's in actual danger. He's just presenting himself as daring. Could be, I didn't see it here. Maybe because I don't see it as very coercive. A dude does that to me and I have no interest, I call his bluff. It's just too over the top to read as an actual threat. Doesn't everyone? The whole point is that he's a lunatic who can be saved by the transformative power of love.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 06:38 PM
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It's a fake threat, lots of flirting contains fake threats and shocking the other person. Threatening to hurt others is pretty different than threatening to hurt yourself? Sure, but we're talking about his intentions, not the consequences of potential realities. If he believes he ain't slipping cuz he's strong as an ox, he's not making a real threat. He can still be stupid or short-sighted, but he's not making a real threat. I mean, he is trying to get her to go on a date with him, sure. By flir…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 03:58 PM
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The movies are all (both have been made many times) pretty bang on to the books. I mean, this would be a criticism these art pieces make, which is that things aimed at men are presumed to be universal in appeal while things aimed at women are not presumed to be universal in appeal despite the fact they are universal in appeal. Men watch slice of life anime all the time that wishes it was as good as either of these. But they think that's somehow different because Japanese. I don't think these thi…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 03:50 PM
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Again, I thought the whole point was that he knows she's gonna say yes and he's showing off how strong he is. It wasn't believable to me that he was genuinely mentally unwell enough to kill himself over a girl. It's a display of strength and passion. I don't see coercion because he doesn't seem like he's really gonna do it to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 03:44 PM
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They're classic literature...yes, commonly aimed at women, but Austen and Alcott are considered excellent for all genders to read. My father loves both as do my brothers
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 03:38 PM
3

Vindictive, sure, not true, hardly.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 03:11 PM
5

Lmao. If we're close enough that he's doing this shit to me, I already know his bad sides. It isn't slander if it's true. And it'll br true.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 02:01 PM
3

I actually generically despise the entire filtering standards concept if I'm being honest. This isn't really how dating works unless you're terribly jaded or autistic. We're social and romantic creatures. We're either drawn together and kept together by discovered compatibilities and feelings or we aren't. If you aren't connecting, you aren't connecting. This isn't some issue of "I said my standard was x and he or she is y". That really isn't happening. People feel genuinely repelled by differen…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 02:00 PM
0

The definition of hypergamy is dating across and up social hierarchies (often economic being primary). Men here focus almost exclusively on the up part. They are angry there is no down part. If they used the entire definition, I would largely agree this happens, but there are exceptions when a man is exceptional. Most of these men are putting the wrong effort in, they aren't putting zero effort in. They're not working smarter and eventually they won't work harder either.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 01:50 PM
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Little Women and pride and prejudice being feminist is a real stretch on the definition of feminisn...and if they were, both would likely fit "the good kind".
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 01:45 PM
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So basically, you did not read my list because it pretty much grabs from across the spectrum of cinema. I have two David Lynch films here for godsakes. I was trying to figure out how to explain having a Jackie Chan film, but I couldn't quite articulate it. I don't think more than maybe two of these films could even be truly accused of pandering to feminism. And only one would be at all a fair accusation.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 01:44 PM
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But it isn't fun or cool so it did not appear on my list.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 01:40 PM
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I'll have to watch that myself!
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 01:39 PM
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I feel like in the Notebook he doesn't mean he'll commit suicide. It is teasing and flirtation and showing off. But maybe I'm missing that being real 🤣
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 01:38 PM
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Love many of these recommendations. Especially the When Harry Met Sally. I feel like that is a truly iconic rom com with so much to say.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 01:37 PM
13

I'm fine with it. For me, if a dude is ready to go that far to discover my sexual past (as nearly non existent as it was), I've got nothing to hide and I'm not ashamed of anything I've done. I consider that it either means he won't continue dating me, so that's a win for me because this guy is all kinds of invasive and paranoid. Sometimes when God closes a window he keeps the flies away. Or, he's going to try to hold some element over my head to get something. And if that's the case, well, I've …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 04:16 AM
2

If I had been less open minded about dating autism, my life would have been much better on nearly every front. Same for dating ugly weird guys. It turns out, the under the hood is not better and getting to know someone just entangles you, but not strongly enough to actually tolerate their crappy behavior they cannot help. So based on this is it fair for me to insist ugly weird autistic men take accountability for not being apple pie to date? And maybe they can work on being more open minded abou…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 03:56 AM
22

Big Fish - I'd hope they'd think about legacy and how a great legacy is often built on helping others for legitimately no real reason. Learning how to tell their own big fish story. And something about not being afraid because you get to tell your ending. Oh, and a solid representation of how most women wish to be "selected" by a man. Meet Joe Black - I'm not sure there's anything this movie doesn't touch on. It's practically a treatise on both love and dying. I guess I would hope they'd take aw…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 02:49 AM
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Can't say this thought ever crossed my mind. I'm gonna guess you watch too much anime and maybe hentai.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 09:34 PM
13

I try to and I think in some cases, yes. In others, I'm sure no. Often, I'm not necessarily trying to change these men in particular, I'm playing for the audience especially younger people who read these threads to drive them away or help them see this is not a perspective based on rational thinking. This is someone else's trauma spiral. Don't make it yours because the girl you liked in middle school chose someone else.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 07:36 PM
2

"Dude, your dad totally murdered your mom"
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 07:10 PM
1

If ya keep using the language of reward and punishment, you are not different than the men you hate, you're just choosing to emulate the supposedly successful part. But you too, do not see women as people with agency and diversity. You see a trophy you didn't get.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 07:01 PM
2

No, I meant a genre aimed at women. I think it's a surprise hit with women more than aimed at them.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 03:51 PM
3

You're right xD For me having a dude threaten to kill himself over me was painful.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 03:50 PM
5

Wasn't it written by and directed by a man? I haven't seen many girls lionizing it nor is horror generally a female centric genre. I could be wrong, but it seemed aimed at men to me. You don't need to pathologize men like this to women...we actually deal with them usually starting at pretty young ages. The first time a guy threatened to kill himself if I didn't date him I was 12 and he was 14. Like, I don't need help here.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 01:46 PM
3

Yeah, so will you. I'd bet on her, if she even exists since I doubt with this attitude you're easily finding a woman fine with this.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 01:13 PM
10

Yeah, it's wild. Especially for me because I did date pathetic sad sack nice boys and not Chads until my husband. They were the worst. Why aren't they apologizing to me based on their twisted logic.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 12:00 PM
3

You chose war. She's just fighting it. And my experience is the women tend to win this particular war one way or another. Kids grow up. And when they realize why they're growing up without an intact household, they tend to rightly blame the dad in this case...especially since it's not like you're going to stop being an anxious nut job in the mean time.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 11:59 AM
23

Marital rape did regularly include the man violently holding her down, actually. We have it included in plenty of artistic accounts and it was a well established norm. And I love my husband. He's never had to hold me down or ask me to think of the motherland. Wonder if these things could be related?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 11:57 AM
1

I think this applies to many of them, but not the majority. I think the majority want zero emotional entanglements at all and to always be in a position of cool detachment and dominance. I think this is because almost everything they say here is a trauma response.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 11:53 AM
15

There's also this bizarre "take accountability to me" element. Like they want you to explain yourself to them and apologize to them, and make right to them....even tho they're a literal stranger on the internet. It's just sadistic intent dressed up with no place to go.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 11:47 AM
1

Lmao. We agree. My side of the street is clean. He can spend the rest of his days fighting me for access to my kid because mommy isn't letting her kiddo near a crazy person that prioritizes his anxious demons over the people he's sworn to love, honor, and has no reason to distrust. Cuz if he'd betray me like that, he'd betray the a baby in a heartbeat.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 11:44 AM
1

There's only really one part here. You don't think they're talking about women. That's all they do. Literally, all they do. They are angry women are occupying what they see as a masculine role as the expense of what they deem to be the feminine role, child rearing.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 11:42 AM
4

O.o yeah, I'm getting why they're saying this. Deprogram? Really, dude. You don't want a person. You want someone to play a predetermined part based on anxieties about how a relationship you haven't even had yet could go wrong and catastrophic thinking... With that said good luck, hope you find her.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 11:40 AM
2

I don't believe so no. There rarely is some unique reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 11:27 AM
0

I'm glad you're a good "dad". But I do not buy what you are saying.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 11:26 AM
1

They wouldn't be the man in OPs description would they? I've known almost assuredly more nerds than you. I don't hate them, I just know their problems extremely well, particularly the ones that want to be someone's fixer upper. Oh oh, pick me, I knew. I knewd it. I'm a knower. I rolled very low and I still knewd it because my skill bonus is that high and I wear a ring of knowing things.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 04:02 AM
2

Usually they get rejected and then go on a mini non violent (if you're lucky) warpath trying to destroy your social life and paint you out as a villain for not returning their love. Some get arrested for stalking, breaking, and entering or attempted assault. The ones that do the latter usually get restraining orders and therapy. The ones that do the former generally eventually move on and do it all over again or if they're lucky grow to realize women will not make them whole and hopefully find s…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 03:59 AM
10

...oh honey, because that's what lonely and insecure men do. They obsess about just one who they invent as this savior figure that through her love and only her love he would be made whole. Almost every woman I know has been through this...at least once. I'm personally at about 3 myself.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 03:48 AM
1

Lucky it's not a constant consideration. It's a contextual consideration. You know, alone at night being a big part of this. When alone in non public spaces particularly in an intimate situation.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 03:44 AM
-1

You're on thin ice here, dude: Clearly, I do not think this preventative measure is causing terribly much harm compared to your serial killer scenario. Clearly, I also believe that there are many more suicidal men who harm others than serial killers. If I had good reason to believe 10% of men were serial killers and 33% talk about it in depth, but haven't quite killed yet, I'd have to strongly entertain some utilitarianism especially since serial killers creep me the absolute fuck out. And no, w…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 03:04 AM
4

No, it's more like, and look, I'd say this to a lady too and have to my one lady friends, like, it seems like you've made up this casting call essentially for the woman who will be your partner, and in some ways it's good to know what you want your life to be and look like... But in others you're removing room for an actual person to come along because life isn't a movie, it's life. It's meant to be more fluid and you meet someone and something that never clicked before clicks. And I don't think…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 02:43 AM
15

Like all Contrapasso based stories...the message is not for the victims, it's for the victimizers. Dante's Inferno was not a warning for the people harmed by sinners, it was for sinners. Women, I mean most women anyway, know the unattractive loser can be a rapist, and if they don't, it's not long before they will find out. Obsession isn't for the girls, at least I don't think so. Obsession is for the boys. That's why all the horror inflicted is on the obsessive male character. Yes, we as women c…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 01:57 AM
-1

I'm done talking to people that ad hominem me and misconstrue what I'm saying and then bringing in nonsense on other topics. My request has been very valid. This is a preventative procedure. So I want to see the stats on prevention. This is a preventative procedure being claimed to cause damage. I want to see the stats on damage. I do not currently accept the anecdotal remarks of a single man who is already mentally unwell and also DID NOT KILL HIMSELF OR HE COULD NOT HAVE GIVEN THE REMARK as st…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 01:52 AM
2

I think, with so much kindness, they should get over it because if you're reading the same list and you have a sympathetic heart, that would overwhelm the offense by miles because you're hearing women say they're afraid to be murdered, raped, etc. Like, just don't get on the elevator or walk on that side of the street. We're talking about giving women panic attacks so you don't have to feel compared to the worst of the worst....It's just not generous nor kind.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 01:41 AM
10

I'm just guessing since I wasn't there to know why those people said that: It typically sounds like you're putting the cart before the horse in the sense some of these things seem like something you decide with someone else rather than decide and then find a woman who fits the part. But I'm just guessing that's what they're about? I couldn't say for certain. And then I actually look at your list and I suspect they're telling you that if wishes were horses we'd all ride around. Cuz that list is l…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 01:38 AM
1

Nerds don't let you build a man outta him. Lmao. They wouldn't be in that state if they could listen to, respect, and desire to please other people truly. Women will be stuck alone if their goal is to actually make a love match, not play fixer upper with a guy who the HGTV guys wouldn't touch with a ten foot pole.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 01:34 AM
1

Like all metaphors, this one eventually breaks down...I think this one does quicker than most honestly, but, I understand it helps people who haven't realized dating is not entirely a just close your eyes and wish upon a star process.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 01:32 AM
7

I was raised without survival instincts like many women. I was protected and cherished. And it was presumed I would somehow remain forever a chaste little girl unbewitched by men and having a sexuality at all was shamed...all while I was also raised and taught to be as appealing and pleasant by and for men as possible which is a lot like raising a lamb for the slaughter and forgetting to mention a slaughter and also expecting the lamb to "figure out how to avoid a slaughter". So yes, when I beca…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 01:31 AM
11

So when women go to work it's at the expense of the children....but when men go to work....well that's *check notes* actually no, I've got nothing it just says "remember, men work = good, women work = bad".
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 01:21 AM
1

I'd love to spend more time with my husband, but he works and I have the summer off and he likes alone time to work on his car. So here I am doing my own stuff and raising heck here.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 01:16 AM
–

Girls clothing rarely comes at all modest anymore. It's a real problem when shopping for clothing for little girls and young girls. I've listened to many mothers and fathers bemoan this struggle especially if they don't have tomboys on their hands who want to wear basketball shorts and baggy t-shirts.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 01:15 AM
3

My adaption will include a divorce. That's how I'd get over this man telling me he doesn't trust me after everything we've been through and done together. It will be uncanny how I will let him go. And my feelings will die down...for him and I will remember why I was hurt. I'm like a vault on this. I still remember the shit he did to hurt me since we met, but lucky for him, that was all forgivable. This wouldn't be. But go ahead, let's fuck around and find out. And lest you wonder, I've never tho…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 01:14 AM
2

I have not experienced a lot of compassion, empathy, nor sympathy from men in some very specific arenas which are mentioned in this post. I'm not saying zero, but it is rare, especially when men and boys are young. But, I don't want to say none because when I have felt it, it was very life altering.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 01:07 AM
1

I think most men have a terribly unhealthy relationship with women and sex...and it is a significant explanation why they get so little of both, fail to maintain long-term connections, and struggle with their own inner monologues.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 01:03 AM
1

It seems so, yes. It's the only explanation that is sensible based on their worldview. And trying to tell them it's not fucking about them has not gone over well because that's how self-obsessed they are.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 01:02 AM
-2

I have yet to see strong evidence of harm compared to the variety they are attempting to prevent. And again, unless you show me stats or anecdotes on how many have been prevented, I am not interested in a biased and overly emotional reading of this nor your attempt to ad hominem me with this irrational "guess you don't care" line of pathetic nonsense.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 01:01 AM
11

It arrives when they have daughters or girlfriends. A lot of these men don't. So there is an element in them which is wounded and living an arrested development. And if we give minor credit, some of the kindest strangers I've ever met were men. Including one I particularly remember seeing me sitting crying on a bench at night in university (I was waiting for a ride). We came over and stayed about 15 feet away and asked me if I was ok or if he should call someone, maybe the police or something or…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 11:49 AM
–

Assuming this is true, hasn't been my limited experience...periods. There's some days it's just like unstoppably dripping and even pulling your pants down or changing your tampon gets blood somewhere you can't even fathom or guess. And then you go to chuck it and there's no bag in the little thing or worse no receptacle and now you're holding a bloody thing and you're fucked because it has to go somewhere so you can put a new one in or on and pull your pants up to get it to hopefully a garbage c…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 11:43 AM
–

As a funny woman, it has been my experience men don't take jokes at their expense very well either. Has a woman ever threatened to punch you in the face for a good zinger? Cuz a man threatened to punch me in the face for a witty remark he didn't cotton to. And he's far from the only man I've detected to be a spot dangerous when the joke wasn't for them. See, my experience is that the reason women aren't taking your jokes is that they aren't very funny. See funny is kind of universally powerful i…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 03:54 AM
–

I understand people think this and in some cases for good reason. My impression is that the sex goes because all the other pillars are in jeopardy, not the other way around. That's in part why if sex is the only thing dissipating and everything else is truly fine, which it absolutely can be, the marriage will persist. The marriage fails to persist when other elements go and then sex, which was the last bastion goes.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 03:27 AM
11

O.o I think the messaging is almost literally the title of the movie, dude. It's a warning against these one-sided unrequited obsessions men of a certain variety tend to have towards women. It takes you through what is a relatable desire (senpai notice) and shows you the results of forcing senpai to notice you. It makes the audience deal with how often male fantasy is disconnected from the desires and interests of the object of his obsession. And then in turn it reverses the obsession by having …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 03:20 AM
4

Dude, I'm married. I'm not in the dating game anymore, I've moved on to hero mode. The men in my life are a diverse bunch and I'm not saying this applies to anyone else's. But one is living in such an intense arrested development due to bad parents that he's not even trying to date. The other is so in his own head and way and admittedly a little lazy and behind on getting a job that that he spends ages trying to work up to talk to a girl and then bails almost the moment they don't just fall all …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 02:59 AM
3

The only time I think of lonely broken men outside of debating here when bored is the dudes in my life that are sad and lonely. And I don't laugh about it, I try to help, but it's insanely difficult to do so.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 01:54 AM
–

I do not doubt it: again, it's a great battleground for everything else.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 01:00 AM
–

I don't think it will if their commitment is based on more than sex or if they otherwise hold each other in positive regard. I think most of the fights over sex are between people who use sex as a battleground for everything else wrong in their marriage or a lack of anything else right.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 11:25 PM
–

I partially agree with you in the sense it is is unwise to marry someone you wouldn't want regular sex with....BUUUUUT and it is a big but: Women's hormones change and so do relationships. Where once two people were young, in love, with all the time in the world, time turns those flames to embers as children come into the picture, careers, ailing family members, community commitments, bitterness, resentment, menopause, damage from those children, and so on. I think if one were to say it is foolh…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 11:18 PM
6

Haven't heard of it. My best friend is a dude and I have many other dude friends. The only time they're excluded is from girl only shit. And they're welcome to be vulnerable and have emotional intimacy within boundaries of what is appropriate given that I'm married and not their person.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 09:56 PM
1

If you're an idiot in a toxic relationship, sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 09:28 PM
3

Yes, you can. I worked at a hot line. They collect such data typically. Good, let's do that too.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 09:27 PM
-1

I do not see your point, good sir. The research isn't fraudulent unless I missed something. It says 1/10 admit to previously physical violence and the other 33% admit to emotional abuse. I would justify this policy under the 1/10 alone. Yes, many of those men are being abused physically back...that does not change their potential to become violent does it? If anything it suggests they will see solid justification for their violence. (Which for the record, I would understand. If my husband slappe…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 06:25 PM
10

I get asked it every time I go for a medical check-up of any kind including peeing to find out if I have a bladder infection. Frankly, I always joke with them that the bladder infection isn't that bad.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 06:20 PM
3

I'm not Aussie. I would be pulling from the stats I found with a quick google which included the National Center for Medicine and National Institute of Justice. I do not assume Americans and Aussies are terribly distinct. Again, HOW MANY LIVES WERE SAVED BY THIS POLICY is a real question you cannot ignore. You yourself are willing to acknowledge something like 1/10 men are becoming physically violent. 10%. And all it takes to kill someone or injure them permanently is a kick, a punch, or a slap …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 06:17 PM
2

How many have been prevented by this program is a real question, dude. You have not solved the unsolvable, you've more or less said "that's an appalling problem, but what can be done!?".
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 06:04 PM
–

Sure, but more juniors total will die by the pure nature of this thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 06:02 PM
1

Look, this is what we call a no-win situation, right? Suicidal men do often present a risk to those around them. This isn't hearsay or cruelty, it's simply facts and tragic facts at that because often this includes children (not that murdering women isn't tragic, but I think we can all agree murdering children is significantly worse). The problem is that you don't know when you're dealing with a man who is only a risk to himself (not that a man killing himself doesn't harm others. Obviously it i…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 05:28 PM
1

I don't even see apathy is the problem. Apathy would be a profound lack of care or concern. That doesn't seem to be present, what I see is people trying and failing to connect well. But they do want to. The want is genuine, it just fizzles or flops.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 04:14 PM
–

You're missing one detail here....who died in WW2 besides the minorities, political enemies, immigrants, etc. The discontented men. And who made up a significant majority of the people fighting to stop them....disaffected poor men. And who was still a significant majority of the minorities, political enemies, immigrants, etc. Men. Yes, it leads to horrors for everyone women included. I don't think anyone is denying that. But women will always have a greater safety from death because they can be …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 04:12 PM
2

I'm speaking purely about how I interact in debate spaces. Real life is a different place entirely. Again, intentions can influence perspectives on true, fair, and solvable, so I'm not ignoring them, but, they aren't something I would choose to litigate unless there's really no other meat on the bone. And they won't throw me off if I believe the message is accurate. By way of example, I think the overwhelming majority of feminists that I see online are highly if not exclusively motivated by some…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 03:58 PM
3

I'm intrigued you see what I said as excuses rather than a pretty pointed observation about the downer nature of men in social settings that results in them being invited fewer places. If your point is men are victims of their own nature...I mean, I agree. Most people are their own worst enemy from giving into their own natural inclinations.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 03:11 PM
4

Thank you. I'm hoping someone got my T.S. Elliot reference.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 03:09 PM
2

Both specific observable behaviors and vibes/outcomes-based thing. Both highly contextual and a reliable toolbox. I evaluate them purely on demonstrated social skills and then I evaluate other factors to arrive at a conclusion. Per example, my extremely autistic cousin has good social skills for an extremely autistic person. If I evaluated him like everyone else, he'd come up weird, but sweet. I also account for the environment and others surrounding them. Clearly, my standards shift based on wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 03:08 PM
1

I can't say I ever consistently treated anyone like shit. Just being honest here. Even as relationships dissolved, I would say things didn't get bad until the last month or so of any friendship or relationship. And, I'm ashamed in one of those cases how nasty I got because it wasn't fair or appropriate. But no, this isn't the norm to treat people who are not "the one" like shit. Most people give decent to good behavior. If that's not your experience, you're in the wrong room.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 02:43 PM
3

I'm only interested in what they are saying is true, fair, and solvable realistically without harming others. Why they say something only interests me in so far as it effects the other aspects or my own personal glee.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 02:39 PM
3

Yeah, was gonna say. Very straight laced and methodical women without much patience for nonsense.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 01:31 PM
4

Minutes to months, governor. No one said women do it all themselves. But the impressive and hard part certainly.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 01:30 PM
1

Fair enough. Again, you are having anxiety which is fine. But that's not a healthy thing, right?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 01:28 PM
2

I'm not arguing. I'm sharing with the class. Can't say I've sat um down in this place, no. Just tended to observe.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 01:25 PM
14

Y'all gossip all the time. You just dismiss it as you'd say it to their face too. But god men talk shit all the time. You love to yap. You just don't love it when women do it. That's all. It's a bunch of rules for thee and not for me bullshit when it comes to men and gossip. Men tell shit all the time to other men and even to women. You just resent and fear it when it's woman to woman. And you should. Gossip is how women have traditionally controlled social structures and we're very good at it. …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 05:01 AM
14

Saying I think it makes it sound like I'm the original on this. Which I'm not. This observation has been made by people much more brilliant than me. I simply observe how it plays out over and over again. It also isn't the exclusive reason men fear women. There's lots of others. But yes, women's ability to have and birth children causes significant terror in men in many ways. My favorite is that it's responsible for so much of the men built civilization rhetoric and women just exist rhetoric. It …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 04:49 AM
10

They are. They want women to behave, think, and act like men which is categorically impossible. And not only that, but they then can't them to absorb all male behavior (much of which men themselves will admit is intolerably dehumanizing and cruel) without even giving an irritated look or being avoidant or ignoring them. I don't see men changing how women behave, frankly, they cannot apparently plan a picnic and invite people and that's much less of an undertaking. They can't even do something ba…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 04:41 AM
5

Speaking as someone running a practical confessional for men since I was about the age of 7. Nope. Big fat nope. Y'all need to talk and quite badly. And about the stuff women do naturally. You've just been socialized that it is unsafe (by each other) and thus you almost exclusively do it to whatever women or girls are around you provided you perceive them as safe. And much, I mean a significant pie slice of the rage you see from men towards women is for either not giving them emotional safety in…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 04:21 AM
9

You'd think. No, men fear death. And one of the classic responses to a fear of death (look at art) is to surround yourself with life firstly and secondly to seek immortality. What is more filled with life than women? Nothing. We literally create it and contain it. We also have a tendency towards being the more joyful, optimistic, nurturing, cultivating, and alive gender (thus the manic pixie trope). And then obviously pregnancy, we are the most obvious symbol of life truimphing over death outsid…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 03:55 AM
8

Uh uh. Nope, say it right: Men make it a pain in the ass and unpleasant to hang out with them. And thus women naturally eventually get the message that men do not like hanging out or will not foster it. And thus, women eventually avoid it. After all, clearly I could not know this if I hadn't tried inviting men places or had them places to hang out. So I must have done it at some point to develop this opinion. But...and this is key...if men weren't making it difficult and we're fun and fostered i…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 03:47 AM
-1

I think that differs man to man, but just some examples off the top of my head I see a lot: Being irrelevant Being obsolete Having to form an independent identity Not being good enough Other men being better Never mastering Death
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 03:45 AM
3

I used to frequent HealthyGamerGG and someone was crossposting or mentioned this place. I've been in online communities my whole life that were predominantly men and grew up under a very conservative father. I was about the right age when Gamer Gate hit and the old red pill which was more about men's mental health and rights hit. I was predisposed towards sympathy for men given my upbringing and old chronically online nature so it struck a bit of a cord with me to care about things like the cour…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 03:13 AM
5

It's fear deeper down than jealousy. It seems like jealousy, but they're actually afraid of us.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 03:04 AM
7

Artificial Wombs Not Invented - Men Most Affected Can't make this shit up.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 03:02 AM
14

I ignore most people, honestly. And I don't invite most people places because most people suck. Everyone wants a village, but no one wants to be a villager. And the reason I don't invite men most places is they're such a pain in the ass to hang out with. More even than women. Which men would say no? Most. Certainly nearly 100% of the men complaining they can't get a woman's attention. And if they didn't, they'd be a stick in the mud about everything. They'd complain and make that sour depressed …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 02:59 AM
3

What HR ladies has he met? All the ones I've met are like 50 and happily married or happily divorced. And not the kind of woman anyone makes a town bicycle out of. I don't think they even let slut material women be in HR because I worked in the school for HR at university. And none of those women had even slut potential.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 02:50 AM
1

It's a clear indicator of some kind of interest and some kind of courage at least exceeding those who did not. If your goal is to argue with women an approach is not a sign of genuine individual interest you won't get disagreement from us. It wouldn't be from the shy guy either in our world. They aren't most attuned to social cues is the thing or they wouldn't struggle. One guy doesn't care. The other cares so much their eyes swim and they can't get a read. One may be socially attuned, but is ch…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 02:48 AM
2

As I'm now telling everyone: if yoj mention corporations or consumers we aren't thinking in the same realm and that's ok. I wish you all the luck in the world understanding individual intimate interactions like they're the fucking economy.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 02:39 AM
2

I answered someone else on this. Reward is interpretive and in this case interpreters are unreliable. You can take any action and interpret it as rewarding if you're fucked up enough. The reality is, no one is giving you a consequence. No one is punishing. And no one is rewarding. You choose to interpret these behaviors in whatever way you want in order to protect your ego.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 02:38 AM
2

I genuinely think this is either intrusive thoughts or them purposefully self harming due to a huge amount of self loathing. And I think they're afraid to try and this helps them not have to.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 02:36 AM
1

I'm not having difficult, friend. I'm telling you that we understand this very differently and the fact you're citing businesses and the fucking economy is the sign we are looking at different things. Women are not a mega corporation nor consumer society. I swear to fucking God the worst thing that ever happened to dating was people analyzing it like it's the fucking economy. Women are individuals with individual tastes and reactions which can then be broadly categorized and then are interpreted…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 02:33 AM
10

That wasn't even close to my twenties. Not. Even. Close. And all I encountered was dudes who just wanted sex and worse felt the need to lie to get it. I've fucked one man willingly. I think you have no idea what reality is and are hurting yourself with lies and a minority perspective on a minority of women.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 08:34 PM
2

It's not narcissisms to enjoy bouncing off others and giving and getting attention. And no, he's an adult, when he doesn't get his way, he just seeks new spheres or ways to get what he'd like to get and give. You guys need to stop confusing rewards and consequences in this way. Rewards and consequences are considered and meditated. We all move towards what feels good and avoid what feels bad. That doesn't mean there is a rewarder and a consequence giver unless they are being thoughtful, which mo…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 07:54 PM
5

Behavioral modification is consistent and involves replacing behaviors you don't want with behaviors you do want through understanding what motivates the behavior and then finding a replacement that fulfills the motivation without being destructive. Women are not doing this to men for several reasons: We are not acting as a group. We don't hold meetings to discuss men's behavior, their motivations, and how we can best alter it so we get what we want. We are not seeking to replace any behaviors. …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 07:50 PM
6

I would say he's unlikely to, but there are women who will pursue. ...there are men who just talk to lots of people including women, dude. I'm married to one. He's a social butterfly. The only thing he's aiming for is socialization and attention. You want one thing from women and can only imagine talking to them for the one thing. Stop projecting that onto all other men.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 07:40 PM
4

I'm a teacher, I understand behavioral modification is real. Your problem is that women choose men and men choose women. It's mutual. And clearly, men who refuse to act in ways women (and I do mean individual women) choose are not responding to what you call the incentive structure...or are going after the wrong women. It's not a reward. It's women picking what they want. We are not sitting here going "100 points to gryffindor". We're going, I like this man embodying these likable traits. Again,…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 07:00 PM
1

Their stupidity and ability to deny women's agency does not change reality. I too can live in denial.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 06:55 PM
1

This isn't that complicated...women are not rewarding anything. We're not a prize to be won nor some weird Gordon Ramsay top chef judge. Not all, but most of us want a man who will make the first move. We're not interested in the man who can't bite this bullet. Everyone fears or dislikes rejection. We are only interested in men that can act anyway. We want men with confidence. We want men who can come across as daring or charming. We want men who can feel uncomfortable and act anyway. We are sel…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 06:04 PM
2

If you're in a public space in the morning, afternoon, or twilight and they do not appear actively engaged with something...you can absolutely compliment a shirt or Keychain. I do it all the time to everyone and I'm married. Maybe it becomes a conversation, maybe you just make someone's day with a nice compliment which is still a great thing to do. Compliment everyone all the time. It makes the world nicer. And luckily, there's still many places to go where you can form social circles that allow…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 05:32 PM
–

O.O the fucking audacity. This is what the mafia used to be for. I'm not saying that violaence is the answer, but in this case it's at least worth a consideration. People that cheat with friends of their partner and thay their kids know got to the lowest layer of hell and kept going.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 04:04 AM
–

Yeah. And look, you can say a lot of things, that my mom isn't compatible with him, is difficult to tolerate, all of it. But doesn't love him ain't on the list. She's bad at it probably, but she loves him despite it all. And it's extremely likely that if he wasn't married to an ivy league NP, he'd be dead today. The irony of his life: the thing he resents her for most is going to school to be a nurse. And she's never once thrown that fact in his face. Not once. Even at his worst, and post covid …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 04:02 AM
–

You're forgetting all the men who murder their pregnant wives or wives period. I'm just saying, the fact we're forced to dignify this is a sign of the audience.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 03:56 AM
4

Women can compete for men. I've seen them. It never works out. Just like it doesn't for men. If you've got to compete, that isn't for you. Arguably they were never in it by your worldview. They didn't fail to compete, they were never in the running at all. I'd just say they were never meant to find someone or their someone is still out there.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 03:03 AM
4

Sure, but they got a day on a boat. It's playing the lottery with a guaranteed party attached. It's not delusion so much as betting. Sure, that's being a rich dude. Yeah, there is, unfortunately. People are dumb. Disappointment sure. I'm disappointed when my scratch offs my gran gives me at Christmas don't win five bucks. This isn't delusion, it's just normal disappointment.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 03:00 AM
5

I couldn't even begin to hazard a guess because my brain notices how a man's personality influences his movements, appearance, and expressions so much.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 02:17 AM
–

I'll just say my parents are the definition of unhappily married and if you had to run the math, most people would agree my father is the villain while my mother is just an imperfect victim. (I wouldn't agree, but, it's not entirely an unfair read). When he got COVID-19 she pretty much snatched him from the jaws of death, barely. And it was learned likely a massive heart condition was in part responsible for how bad things got. And why does he have the condition, well, being fat and eating the d…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 02:15 AM
–

I think it's a mistake a lot of people make with attachment theory to think it's immediately playing a role. My best understanding of attachment theory is that it describes how people behave in well...attached relationships. Not dating, not getting to know each other, but how you operate once you are emotionally entangled with someone. The problem with modern dating is that we've invented more and more ways for people to be barely or lightly emotionally attached for longer and longer periods of …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 02:09 AM
1

It's not a competition because I refuse to compete. Something is either for me or it isn't. And while I may be able to alter the course of someone's interests, I don't want to because I want it to be for me without requiring me to act out of character. To the right person, you stand out without having to compete because they see what is great about you without others having to be lower. There was no competition for my husband or any other guy I chose to date. They were at least at that time, sin…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 02:05 AM
2

I can't say if they're shoving them in your face actually, which would be cruel...or if it just feels that way. Either way, if that's where you're at, it is reasonable to separate from that situation and try to find a healthy way to talk that through or at least get it outside of you and channel it elsewhere.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 02:03 AM
2

Couple of ways, honestly. Realize no one is thinking about you or your actions as much as you are because you don't matter to them to that degree. Recognize the catastrophic thinking you are likely utilizing and that like all catastrophic thinking, just because the first few steps sound reasonable doesn't mean the end conclusion is. Look at likely your childhood and how your parents raised you for the smoking gun for why you act and feel this way. Forgive them, forgive yourself for developing th…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 02:02 AM
5

I mean, it's not as delusional as it sounds if that's the territory, right? All it takes is this guy to catch feelings or be having a low moment and boom, they've got something going, which is more likely than you'd think. And if not, they get to say they bagged a rich guy for a minute. There's just not a lot of downsides to the situation you're proposing is the problem. It's not delusion so much as a lack of long-term focus.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 01:59 AM
11

I'm going to leave aside your usual "women communicate indirectly, irrationally, and with feelings" because frankly, I'm just too direct, rational, and calculated to entertain such nonsense from someone who can't handle someone saying something politically tense and gets upset. Not very cool-headed of you. I think you aren't really on the money about women as a whole category. I'm sure this describes some number of women, apparently the ones you're observing for a start. I don't think it describ…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 08:52 PM
–

When I was young, I did not have a solid set of standards and expectations because I was learning the field. And I'm lucky I was smart enough to not just move in or wife up. Not everyone comes from my circumstances, so they have to learn the hard way and are way too entangled to just easily up and cut ties. This is true for both genders for the record. And many think they can ask and they shall receive. People aren't like that. Behavioral modification has taught us that people only change throug…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 08:05 PM
10

How many women do you think are actually on boats with six foot tall gorgeous men that they aren't monogamously dating and aren't the equals of? Cuz I gotta tell you, I don't think there's many such cases. And most women may not be great at reading their own level, but they can read another woman's easily and most of us know if our friends are getting used for sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 07:56 PM
4

I would have said boring, awkward, or tedious as the most likely cause. Which I do kinda consider to be a bad personality at least on flirt blush and then kind of taxing to deal with if I did find some gem-quality underneath that. I think men undervalue how much a lot of this comes from selfishness of a really boring kind. Not like a build a gold statue to me kind. But a self-obsessed anxiety kind. And this can lead to darkness, but more often it just means everyone else has to carry your ass an…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 07:51 PM
5

I mean, I think it's comparing themselves to men is part of it (and this is in part why men think it's worth it). It's pretty easy to think it's worth it when you ain't risking death, changing your biology forever, and doing things to your body people including your husband may go on to call "ugly, fat, or wrecked". They imagine what it would be like to be a man, which is to say you get all those good things you mentioned with zero of the downsides. The second is that apparently, it's not as str…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 07:47 PM
5

My experience is that it goes more or less like this: There is a given environment which by design forces socialization of some kind usually via partnered activity. We call this a third space usually. So, sports, crafts, skills, discussions, whatever. People join this activity and like a middle school dance they tend to initially group up or partner with their same gender and form relationships. A couple things are responsible for the intermingling of the genders: Pre-existing family or communit…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 06:22 PM
5

I'm married, I don't need to go anywhere. I figured out how to navigate finding a wonderful man without giving into the flock of seagulls. No need to get spicy, I'm suggesting there's a historical perspective which suggests there have been many shifts and attitudes towards how courting is done and when it is appropriate for strangers or unknowns of opposite genders to mix and meet. And this in turn suggests there will always be some level of system and rules about it with varying degrees of stri…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 03:52 PM
4

Don't navigate. just be friends. Ask to be fixed up with a single friend. Enjoy the journey. Keep looking.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 03:22 PM
5

I've been approached almost exclusively while shopping, don't ask me why. It's never when I look my best and I don't think my torn between saving money and getting a healthy option face is particularly attractive. And I don't think my "could this elderly lady count out 76 cents of change in nickels and pennies face" is anything short of pained. And I do still loathe it. But I admit, I'm not gen z so maybe they feel differently about it. I was never open to a cold approach. I don't think the conc…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 03:16 PM
6

I think where you're sort of failing is that most of us "cute girls" don't just have one dude we're close with or male best friend. Like, when I look back on the eras of my life there were usually 3-5 guys I was thick as thieves with, 3-5 I was quite friendly with, and 3-5 kind of on the outskirts (they were friends of friends of mine). But it didn't stop there, I had generally 2 extremely close girlfriends, 3-5 good lady friends, and then 3-5 friends of friends. And although it quite surprises …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 02:25 PM
–

I think, and look, I don't know you, but you may want to consider that some part of you did mean to judge her harshly. I think you're giving yourself a bit too much credit on that front that you were a good guy who really tried and she just sucked. Cuz you keep saying things about her are fine, but clearly you don't think they're fine. Like that she likes money and is good at math, not passionate about her field or prospects. You don't actually think this is fine. You want to, but you don't. And…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 04:16 AM
–

Not in a harsh way, but it sounds to me like that girl didn't feel comfortable sharing and probably felt judged by you and inadequate. Not saying you were overtly cruel to her, but if I can pick up you didn't think very much of her, it seems likely she picked it up too. I will say very early in dating, I learned most men were not interested in my stuff and worse felt very comfortable mocking and deriding it as if anything they were into were so much better than what I was. And they do that to yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 04:04 AM
1

Oh, so they have time on unemployment then. We aren't instantly getting rid of people. How long would you give them? Old people do a lot of childcare tho and community service.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 02:49 AM
1

Sure, but clearly I was focused on both mild ethical benefit and tax reduction. We can also throw out anyone jobless, right?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 01:43 AM
1

That wouldn't make for a more ethical society in at least two of those cases...and assuming you embrace a semi western Canon on virtue, mercy and redemption would preclude the third. Again, I'm pro life, but I think this is a dumb argument against supporting pro choice to say "what about my unfucked penis?!"
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 01:25 AM
–

I don't think it's that thought out most of the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 01:23 AM
0

No wukkas.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 10:14 PM
0

I answered that. You either bought it or you didn't. The benefit you get is you live in a more free and less unethical society and less of your tax dollars get eaten up.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 10:08 PM
3

They aren't in relationships and want to be? And cuz I'm their friend and this is a pretty glaring hypocrisy likely holding them back from actually finding someone which is what both want badly.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 10:07 PM
1

I've answered both. Different women and no, women aren't the initial advocates for inclusion in women's spaces.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 10:06 PM
–

Yeah, it's a lot to put on anyone. And none of it is romantic nor sexy.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 10:05 PM
6

I'm American, this is absolutely an American thing. I have two girlfriends that are significantly overweight. Both don't want to date overweight men. And I'm still after a year trying to figure out how to even say something about this because it is such a touchy subject.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 04:38 PM
1

I think everyone is born lonely, they just don't have the words for it for a very long time. And then people figure out how to cope with it and hopefully, eventually, make peace with it. And finding your person certainly does help, I won't pretend otherwise, but even in the happiest relationship, there will be times you feel disconnected or misunderstood. And you may even feel tired and like you don't want to do the work to bridge that gap.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 03:07 PM
3

Yes, you still saw this as something that you could do something to change. I'm glad you felt that and that it worked out for you. Sincerely. But this ain't the mindset most people who know they could find someone mediocre. I'd found good people, I was myself, etc. There wasn't something left for me to do and if you don't think what you want is likely to be out there you don't spin the wheel more. And my advice would have been live in platonic joy with your bestie and community.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 01:09 PM
1

Yes, but even your phrasing of fight suggests you ain't at the mindset I'm talking about. Prior to meeting my husband I thought I'd be alone and live in platonic joy with my BFF. Because I'd realized all the unappealing and barely there options that were most likely weren't real options and I did not expect to meet someone who wasn't that. And I did not see this as something that could be overcome because it was more fact of reality.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 12:44 PM
5

No, they are. You see a train still. They don't. I've been this person, I stopped seeing trains, I just saw further heart break, exhaustion, and time wasted I could have better spent alone. You can't change your mind in the way you're suggesting. Once you see reality you see it.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 12:38 PM
4

One may consider that if you know you don't have an easy way out, growing comfortable and joyful would be a significant priority. I don't think the temporary is the true factor here, being honest. It's genuinely just a mindset difference towards connection and relationships being desirable, but not the dictator of your life. I also think you're not understanding the mindset of the person who may have a handful of unattractive options or an ok option here and there....once you've been down these …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 12:34 PM
2

I was speaking of woefully unattractive ones. And women don't agree who this majority is.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 12:26 PM
2

Again, different camps. I didn't push for it. And, you have to admit, if it is a transwoman as original advocate for this inclusion...it wasn't women who initiated the shared space, right?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 12:25 PM
1

I'm speaking on a large scale. Sure, it wouldn't matter for some minority of men either way. But for the men being held back by acting the fool and making women uncomfortable with their idolization, it would absolutely be the difference. And there's a lot more of them than even the unattractive ones. And that's to say nothing of the fact that by not having this image and entitlement to sex, well, they wouldn't be so goddamm aggressive and pushy, which pushes away more than it brings in. And, eve…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 04:40 AM
5

What? I'm so confused how my point is invalid. Men don't almost ever treat each other as people which makes them miserable. Men don't almost ever treat women as people which makes them miserable. Women treat women as people generally and are doing fine. (Obviously, some competition elements, but it's more subversive and managed). Women treat men as people once they've determined they're safe. So how is my point that men should treat women as people which would ironically lead to more positive ou…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 03:15 AM
2

Yeah, I dunno. It feels the same as like if a woman says homelessness isn't a problem because it mostly effects men the worst...completely ignoring all the tweaker hut tent cities and lack of safety cuz men bad. Like do the math, sweetheart.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 03:09 AM
6

Didn't famous short white king Jean Luc Picard say every link in a chain that binds someone else is a problem for every free creature. I'm paraphrasing, but, the skin in the game is the need for a moral universe. If you need better than that, it's your tax dollars. And I'm pro life, so I'm against this, but, if you believe women should have this sovereignty, then not defending it cuz ain't effecting you is a stupid argument.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 02:40 AM
8

I don't think men treat each other like people either, just in a different way. They treat them as competition. That's just a different way not to see someone as a person. I agree, the need to protect ourselves forces us to approach men with weariness and wariness, but, once safety is assured generally we do.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 02:37 AM
1

Congratulations! May you both live to see 1,000 reasons to rejoice together.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 02:19 AM
9

They would treat women like people, not pernicious and flakey gatekeepers of heaven who must be wined, dined, lied to, and intimidated into giving up the key. Which hilariously would likely lead to a lot more sex and relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 01:41 AM
2

I mean, not great, I would say obviously. I think the first it was a relationship based on curiosity, and I think some of his lashing out can likely retrospectively be explained by it being obvious I wasn't very attracted to nor interested in him and that we'd just been two people who liked the same weird shit. Pretty much ditto to that for the second, except I think he was genuinely a bad person, the first wasn't. He was a decent dude, we just made zero sense together. The third I think was als…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 01:35 AM
–

I think most do end up dating nobody for a long time.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 01:25 AM
17

So, I agree women are not magical goddesses and sex is not supernatural. And I agree if men understood this, many issues would be solved. I don't agree men would gain power back in the dating market necessarily because well, that's the whole problem. The dating market isn't meant to be about power because love, companionship and good stuff like that isn't meant to be about power. And the problem isn't men being nice to women any more than there's a problem with women being nice to men. The probl…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 01:23 AM
–

I'm not sure what turning them on has to to do with this, honestly. The most full of shit and charming men I've met were rarely terribly attractive and most were terribly average in almost every discernable department. One may suspect that was the reason they talked so big and said all the right things. A man who is all the right things rarely has to say so and a man who is quite attractive well, the woman will do all the work for him by lying to herself. He won't have to. So no, I wouldn't reco…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 12:58 AM
1

My first three boyfriends fit the same mold: nerdy, book-smart, lazy, a bit full of shit, but largely incapable of anything beyond intellectual malice and light verbal abuse. I was not physically attracted to them, but stupidly assumed that may someday arrive and I was curious about dating or lonely and they were generally good friends I shared many hobbies and interests with. The only three guys who I quasi dated, but never got anywhere near official with all fit the same mold: stupid, but fun,…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 12:28 AM
–

Yes, especially as you age and meet a few full of shit charmers or dudes that are gonna make it big any day now.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 12:13 AM
1

I feel bad for anyone being strung along and deceived? I've gotten in some real arguments with lady friends for doing a softer version of this.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 07:23 PM
5

I am painting with a broad brush. My experience of gay communities is that their definition of monogamy includes way more than two people way more often than a monogamous straight couple does. I'm aware this does not apply to all. But they're bringing in thirds or fucking people together consistently at crazy rates.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 05:08 PM
2

Wouldn't the digital age make faking confidence easier than ever before? Look, I understand that there are anxious generations rising up, a loss of third spaces, and a loss of social opportunities....but there's also an ability to present an entirely fake or fake it until you make it version of yourself to the world and then all you have to do is stay quiet enough you don't dismiss this character you've pretended to play successfully. I don't think people are necessarily less confident, I think …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 05:07 PM
7

I'm not convinced they're more compatible, I'm convinced their definition of a relationship is so wildly different than a monogamous one that their dysfunction and incompatibility looks way different to the point straight people struggle to detect it instantly while I imagine someone from that community would clock it instantly.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 05:03 PM
10

In my first three months of being a teacher, a boy dropped his pants at me in school...sexual harassment is alive and well in the new generation of boys. A fellow female teacher was also dealing with an entire class of boys repeating the most unkind and inappropriate elements of Andrew Tate and Fresh and Fit and Whatever podcast talking points at her and the other girls. And I teach in one of the top districts in my state with a majority white, followed by Asian demographic. I truly cannot imagi…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 04:52 PM
1

My suspicion is that these are different women and that each of these is a nuanced and complicated topic. Personally, I don't have a problem with a father taking his daughters into a ladies room provided he's had a woman check that the coast is clear or seek permission from the other women there or had his daughters (if old enough) check that it is empty. I understand if other women don't feel this way or have had experiences that make this extremely difficult for them. I have myself. However, t…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 03:19 PM
3

As a teacher, I agree. I really think a class taught by happily married couples and psychologists would go far to helping people do better in such a tough area of life. And again, I really hope it didn't like this came off as a men bad or exclusively men bad. They're just more likely to struggle with this because their same-sex relationships generally feature more things which are corrosive to a certain sort of intimate partnership or lack for these things.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 07:14 PM
2

We may be misunderstanding each other, but the man doesn't directly because he doesn't want to seem desperate typically and for good reason. And because asking is pretty antithetical to asking. If you mean me and my husband...I do often ask directly for things I want, but I also come from a background where needing things was treated as being inconvenient and met with sighs and delays. And sometimes that still comes out in my relationship with me not wanting to be an inconvenience to the person …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 07:10 PM
1

I'm married. I found someone to reciprocate my care and consideration who is pleased with the arrangement. I'm advising from the place of someone who has experienced the inexperienced man and knows first-hand why it doesn't work out well. And once you're a certain age, you just don't want to tolerate it anymore.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 06:57 PM
2

I'm confused, what would be getting asked directly?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 06:56 PM
6

Calling attention to anything changes everything. By calling attention to it, you want attention on it. This pressures another person and typically makes them feel uncomfortable because you're asking them to manage a thing which is not theirs to manage. Why would you call a woman's attention to it if you did not want her to do something. It's like if I casually mention around my husband my windshield hasn't been rainexed in awhile. There's nothing fucking casual about that, I want him to clean i…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 05:10 PM
3

I'm so sorry that happened. I think it's super common and it sucks. I had some learning the hard way to do myself.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 05:06 PM
4

It's not when it's based on either a shared value (abstinence), is sensible (you're both young and between the ages of say 14-22), or is based on some kind of sexual trauma. Every guy I've dated except for my husband had to be taught how to be in a relationship at all. My husband (the experienced one), had to be taught how to be in one with me and not bring his bad habits from the others to ours. And to be fair, I had to stop some of my own bad habits to be with him. It's not the same as being a…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 05:04 PM
4

You can't think this seriously applies to sex. Watch: "Maybe we should have a foursome where two dudes fuck you and I watch" "No, that isn't something I want to do." "We could just give it a try". Or more on the subject: just add in the phrase - but you did it with your ex girlfriend. Don't you love me as much? The no was a full sentence. If you can't understand and appreciate that after 15 years of marriage and children, you are deeply selfish or stupid. Either way, bye bye.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 04:15 PM
11

I think mature adults are not eager for romantic connections because they recognize this is something which takes time to cultivate, represents a huge paradigm shift for life, and that this process is hard and requires a lot of compromises. They want a romantic connection with the right person at the right time in the right way. And, they recognize finding this is unlikely and that the most likely outcome is either wasting their time or heartache. They are not like a golden retriever puppy about…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 02:42 PM
8

Different women.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 12:26 PM
2

Because before that you're at most pretty to look at in an abstract impersonal way? It's like asking me why my affection for cats depends on if they're purring, rubbing all over my legs, letting me hold them and tell them what darling beauties they are...cuz before that they were any old cute stray cat looking at me that I don't know. How else would it work?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 12:24 PM
3

Cluttered counters are efficiency. I've heard it all today. And I'm like the dude, if I can't see shit I forget it. But I don't call this limitation efficiency. The entire house should appeal to both of you and you each get exclusive spaces. Why is it another way...could it be because she's doing everything and a man is goofing off in one room?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 12:20 PM
0

Yeah, different situation for sure. My husband and I really were just good friends for the first years we knew each other. I don't think either of us really thought we'd date. I thought he was hilarious, adventurous, and streetwise. He thought I was sweet, kind, and book smart. Even we we first started dating, I don't think either of us thought it would last because we came from such different life experiences. Fate is a strange place. But yeah, if he was doing that shit, I'd have sent him to th…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 04:23 AM
0

It was 8 years ago and he wasn't my husband and he was not trying to upset me, he was trying to get pain off his chest to the first kind ear he met in his entire sorry life up to that point.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 03:59 AM
11

Chaos like refusing to fuck and love broke useless men...and solutions like uhhh government mandated girlfriends? Chaos like not even being close to leading in war, rape, murder, theft, and drug abuse and solutions like uh...trying to control the other men doing those things? Chaos like leading in all areas of charity and non-profit work and solutions like actually put down murdering, war, rape, and theft a second time that's how good men are at that compared to women. It should be said twice. L…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 03:57 AM
4

So all the single mothers looking after kids men pumped out...not making that man's life possible for him to live easier? And don't even mention child support since we know how often that goes paid and we also know the mother is also financially supporting the child. Or all the harrowed wives we know work jobs while the husband is a derelict at home not even watching the children or running a house? I think you're just playing word games here, dude. Technically anyone can be fine if you lower th…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 03:53 AM
9

Would you also agree that many, if not most of the relationships where one person is holding it all together and is what keeps everything going is the woman? Cuz I can't say with maybe two exceptions, I have ever seen men be the ones who are keeping it all going. I've see men do fine without a woman, sure. But I can't say I've more than maybe twice seen men carrying the entire team to use video game lingo. And I think that's where the majority of this narrative is coming from. Which is to say...…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 03:39 AM
12

I swear women are taught to people please see hard that they can't hear the part where a man is whining you won't make yourself sexually uncomfortable, distressed, and agonized so they can get what they want. And then that they so often dare to compare it to trying food. Like, I ain't eating bugs either and I'm never eating certain things again. You're allowed to say no even if it disappoints someone else. Even if they leave.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 03:32 AM
6

The entire measure of character and morals is how you deal with bad feelings. Yeah, cuz he's not the same person and I don't want to inflict things on him he wouldn't enjoy so I can compete with a woman he broke up with. Sure. But your partner also shouldn't be stupid enough to prod for it. No, she was unloving to then use it against you. It was bad behavior. Last I checked, two wrongs doesn't make a right and we are who we choose to be, not who others invite us to be from their poor choices. No…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 03:05 AM
8

Totally. I can't imagine hearing someone say "I don't wanna do sexual thing" and thinking "but what about me?"
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 02:57 AM
7

I'm not a freak. I didn't. I am the unwilling recipient of having gigantic blue eyes, a fawn-like appearance, and an understanding vibe that makes everyone tell me their secrets within minutes or hours of meeting me. And when I met my husband, he was pretty rough up and tormented with no intentions of dating anyone again for a long time. We were good friend for a year and it was like a catholic confessional. When someone "slips up" and reveals something, you get the choice how to respond and dea…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 02:25 AM
-2

My husband has told me all the shit he did with and for girls prior to me. Some of which is absolutely unhinged. And I didn't ask or pry, I was his dumping ground. I don't hold it against him ever. Not ever. Because I love him and that was the past and he was a different person. Stop making excuses for it being human to be selfish and comparative. It's also human to rise above such evil and love. Y'all gotta stop treating your weakness and demons Iike a given.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 02:12 AM
13

I think generally it comes up when dudes pressure for sex and require an explanation why their girl doesn't want to "at least try it". Not that this is a problem for me, but this is why I recommend women don't treat their holes like they're open for negotiation. No is a full sentence. I do not want to is a full sentence. You don't have to justify why you don't want any sexual experience. If he even whispers something about being adventurous or trying something once, you get up, gather your thing…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 01:56 AM
5

I don't think it's different between the genders, honestly. Red flags are red flags. At most the vocab varies. I think better advice for men is something like: Boobs and pussy aren't special, not even the ones you can touch. Not even repeatedly. It is not manly to endure the insane storms of a woman just because she's hot. It's foolish, short-sighted, and selling your peace of mind and dignity for cheaper than the devil would give you.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 01:50 AM
1

Feminism as a conceit just allows women to behave as aggressively disagreeable and selfish as an average man. The alternative path that it seems rational based on that to recommend to men is to allow them to behave just as submissively agreeable and martyred as an average woman and call it uhh Meninism? And I think successful men are already doing this to be fair...but yes, it does include opening up and talking about your feelings probably. And if you try at this for a few well more than a few …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 11:48 PM
2

You're not using your brain. If they see lonely as suffering and a relationship as their only means to end it....what might they do to maintain it - be controlling, be abusive.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 09:58 PM
3

I think you know this positioning is not a fair one, but let's pretend otherwise. Whomst dates gang members...people who come out of that same community and don't have a problem with gang activity. It's basically a job to them. It's like me saying my husband is a supervisor. So beyond the job, there is a man, and yes, they'd rather their man was not a red flag of the stripe we have both apparently agreed is above. Now think about abusive men. No one really wants to be with them. That's why we ca…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 07:26 PM
2

So what I said in more words basically - a series of entirely crimson flags with no upsides? I actually hadn't even considered the one where they want you to be their unpaid therapist meant to fix their inner demons, but now that you mention it, add it to the list. I'm at 7 and I haven't even begun to scratch the surface of this.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 06:51 PM
2

At least initially, yes. Put it back to yourself, why would a reasonable and rational person care so much about a connection with a stranger? What is broken in such a person that they are behaving like this?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 06:42 PM
–

My husband's crush that I support. She's 55 and we both just watch top chef and talk about how gorgeous she is.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 03:47 PM
3

This isn't difficult to understand. When I want to understand people, I ask myself a question: what's the worst reason they could have for the actions they take. (Yes, much of human wisdom is found in GoT). This is just off the top of my head: He's lovebombing so he can rape, murder, or entrap me in an abusive relationship (let's admit unlikely, but not remotely impossible). He's an insecure lunatic seeking validation in the form of a romantic relationship and will live and die on my attention o…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 03:38 PM
3

They weren't argumentative. They were selfish, but in an aloof and childish way. Not in a "I've noticed your needs and chosen to ignore them" way. They almost seemed to not realize I had them.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 02:37 PM
7

Interesting. In my experience they were spineless, low-effort, passive, effeminate, selfish, and thoughtless. I didn't necessarily encounter low agreeableness or highly manipulative behavior. Basically, we agree it suggests bad things, just not which
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 01:20 PM
0

Biological differences? Cultural scripts?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 01:17 PM
1

You might. I wouldn't.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 10:52 AM
1

I'm not thinking of men who would be able to collect data of this kind. That suggests a level of abundance far higher than they are likely to get even with hard work and good boundaries. I'm thinking of the struggling dudes who may be lucky to get one or two girls interested ever.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 04:18 AM
1

Agreed. And I think he has a lot of good info for folks struggling with anxiety, autism, and depression. I don't disagree with the overall have boundaries and standards message by any means. Nothing to do with fucking at all. I just think the not paying especially on low cost dates is going to read as a lack of interest, lack of positive generosity, and lack of investment. I'm not saying cut your dick off and have no standards. I'm saying (before I married), I reached a point in dating where if …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 03:47 AM
5

I didn't strongly disagree with anything here... At most, I can see the demand to go dutch really curbing things in certain cultures and cities because it's just that prominent. Doesn't mean I'm saying go crazy and pay for expensive shit. But buying a cup of coffee or an ice cream or a slice of pizza won't make dick cheaper and it could really be a boon for a lot of guys. And I clap and cheer for the HealthyGamerGG rec.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 02:52 AM
1

O.o are you new here? I don't believe this dude. If anything I'd mock and deride him. But he believes this of himself. Also, the phrase pick meisha needs to die. It sounds so stupid I want to describe it using the r word, but most of them wouldn't come up with anything so stupid.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 02:47 AM
5

Literally just math with mild morality attached. Say you want a bisexual baddie who wants girl banging threesomes MFF and you're the stud in the middle. But the girl you're with doesn't want that. We say find someone else. You say, yeah, but there aren't women lining up for me in the first place. Now, aside from the eye roll all onlookers feel when you say that, find someone else is the only other answer. Cuz what's the other answer, you "negotiate" this woman into accepting something she doesn'…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 02:45 AM
1

I'd add a third category, which is the guy who needs others (a girlfriend) in order to develop positive traits or have a reason to exhibit them. Eg, the guy who would be generous to a girlfriend, but doesn't want to for randoms
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 01:18 AM
24

It's a pretty case by case basis for me and issue by issue thing? Like, of course I have sympathy for anyone struggling with genuine mental illness apparently like yourself and my best guy friend. Unfortunately, you know the answer isn't just medication, but included therapy as well. And I think often men (for a lot of very good reasons and some not so good reasons) sort of refuse to explore treatment options. And a lot of their problems would ultimately require pushing through it, although they…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 05:58 PM
7

This already exists, it's called switching your tinder to international. I'm against what you're describing because it's human trafficking with extra steps as someone else has said. I'm more interested in it if we better define what dating means. If you mean will go on upwards of say 3 dates with a dude and is not required to nor incentivized by any structure to have sex with him, then I'd at least entertain it. Especially if you're equally willing to include the same visa structure for men. And…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 04:21 PM
2

Yes, clearly I believe some people have so much weighing against them that short of a nat 20, they ain't pulling themselves up by their boot straps. That's true in every meritocracy. (You can't ignore the system that hard). This isn't a game breaking revelation. But MOST can succeed if they're willing to make a lot of sacrifices and expend a lot of effort. And to be clear, I'm not saying they should do that. It's likely not even the best option. I look at my heavily heavily autistic cousin. Coul…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 04:18 PM
-2

Dating is a meritocracy, it might be the only one left, honestly. And most people can succeed within some definition of success. I think morality is a pretty broad concept and the people who think like that heavily prioritize comfort, fitting in, and enjoyable interactions as a moral good. Basically, you are morally bad to them. But why care if you don't share their morality. Muslims think I'm morally bad and that's water off a duck.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 04:52 AM
7

You go for that. I'd never sign on and I'd tell my daughters not to and every woman who listens. Sex is way more volatile, valuable, and so forth than money. You want hookers, go buy um.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 04:25 AM
8

Then both systems are working. You're the one that wants to change things. I get it now. You want sex and to not have to even give up money. Greedy greedy.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 04:21 AM
5

That sucks, I'm sorry. It would still equate to having a bad personality, just one caused by a disability.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 04:20 AM
9

You Crack me up like there's some real threat here. 🤣 You know women have y'all over a barrel. If you'll show up and pay for dates until you fuck, waste all that time and money to get sex from someone you don't like and are deceiving so you can ghost, shame on y'all and may God have mercy on your soul. We'll survive the heartbreak just fine. I personally avoided it altogether by never putting out. I was a tar pit for fuckbois. Your little revenge fantasy is so made up. You're mad cuz you pay and…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 03:45 AM
1

Not a feminist really, but a lot don't support trans identities, a lot don't support sex workers, many feel there's too much focus on diversity or too little, many feel there needs to be more international focus or less, and many feel feminism is really just giving women permission to be as awful and selfish as men rather than actually upholding the power and beauty of womanhood. If you're asking me personally...I think the last one is right on the money
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 03:29 AM
10

I do believe that. And I am not baffled by abusive partners. I think what it may hurt lonely men to understand is that even abusive shitty people can have good sides and good personalities. I mean logically it seems unlikely they go to the first date and just start swinging, right? Sounds insane. But maybe they're charming thoughtful and adoring...and then one day they start swinging. And by then the woman is hooked or terrified. If you want to know how they could improve, I mean, can you tell m…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 03:27 AM
5

I'm someone that believes in old school men's rights. But I gotta admit, I get why feminists don't hold much space for men. I have to imagine it's somewhat like being an African Child Soldier listening to say an upper middle class white kid complain that his parents are getting divorced. Except if the white kid complaining was also from generations of African Warlords that create and terrorize child soldiers. Like, some of this goes back to when you lose privilege it feels like oppression conver…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 03:22 AM
6

I forward the preference argument all the time. Yes, good. You understand. She doesn't owe you sex and you don't have to pay. Pick the women who do first date sex for a second date. Don't pick the ones who don't. Do this enough and maybe it will influence culture. (I doubt it, but, you get to try). That's all a certain sunset of women are doing here. He pays or no second date. No wukkas. We've done it enough men basically know if they want to progress things they should pay.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 03:18 AM
-1

He thinks she didn't pay financially and dollars are the only way to pay. But the reality is, a woman compromises her safety to show up, if we accept biological clocks, her time is more valuable, and men gain in reputation from dating while women lose it, even just one date is a hit to her reputation for an unknown while his increases even incrementally. Yes, a man generally paid money...but he was safe, his time is less valuable, and he got a reputation all boost... If you ask me, I'd love to p…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 03:07 AM
–

I was reporting statistics more than personal opinion. I have ideas why this plays out in reality, but, I have seen this play out in reality way more often than the opposite.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 03:03 AM
2

I think there's space between this weird marshmallow doing dates to be nice and doing them with the exclusive goal of romance or especially the exclusive goal of sex. Sure, let's call it what it is. You're paying for a lottery ticket in the form of time with a person. Like most lottery tickets, it's not going anywhere because people are just too different or not right place right time. I tend to look down on men who are unable to see beyond there narrow vision and fail to say find a friend from …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 10:19 PM
6

I'm going to say something controversial: only a man could believe competence isn't moral. But it clearly is. Incompetence puts pressure on everyone else to care for you, look after you, educate you, and as an adult is almost always a result of either laziness, selfishness, or foolishness. The only people I've met that are incompetent without it coming from a moral place are children or the mentally handicapped or sometimes the physically handicapped. Now, does being incompetent make you as evil…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 10:12 PM
3

Too long, didn't read it all. But, this is pretty simple: respect is earned. Strangers or folks you barely know have yet to earn that respect. Thus, they've yet to earn a degree of honesty which requires someone to put themselves in peril or discomfort. The fact someone will not do this for you should not cause you lifelong anything. Silence is a no. That is all you need. You don't need a why. Why is extra. I go out of my way for friends, family. I give full honesty to them. I'm not even fully h…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 10:08 PM
1

Yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 04:14 AM
–

Yes, that's probably true. It's not good to be used for sex in either case.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 04:47 PM
2

I won't do it because I've done it. I think it's often (NOT ALWAYS) a soft landing into being gay, I always felt like they were more attracted to men, and I felt like they always wanted more sexual adventure and debauchery than I would. I also felt like he was more comfortable with dishonesty than I wanted because he was used to hiding a part of himself. And I was dating young. If I was dating at my current age, I would absolutely take diseases seriously given the risky attitude men have towards…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 03:31 PM
–

If she has severe autism, unmedicated bipolar, and depression, I would agree. Have you met any of these in the wild? My cousin has severe autism, he's more or less mentally retarded. Yes, it would be exploitative for a normal person to try to hit that. My best friend had unmedicated bipolar. He was a lunatic during manic episodes. He'd pierce everything on his body, buy crazy shit, and wander the streets unable to remember how to get home. Yes, anyone tapping that would be a bad person if they c…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 01:53 PM
0

I think they care slightly sooner, but I largely agree. And I think they care about proxies more than guys like a guy who has a car for example.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 04:56 AM
2

Some men care sometimes. I think it's probably extremely accurate to say young men (16 to 24) don't care very much if at all. Because they're young, dumb, and not thinking about a life partner, a mortgage or anything so bright. Obviously, not all, but I don't think this is typical. And that's fine. The only reason young women think about this at all is because of pregnancy, a consumer culture that links love with spending potential, and parental involvement being more focused on the ambition of …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 04:22 AM
–

So my husband is well endowed, and I'm gonna tell you a secret: that mf is good with his hands and the hands are vital. If he wasn't good with his hands, his downstairs kitting would not be sealing any deals. I think the reality is a lot of men aren't ready to confront the fact that their dick is unlikely to play the starring role in our complete sexual pleasure. It's great, it's good, but the design ain't all there to really drive towards wild. You being less well endowed is not what will limit…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 02:07 AM
5

I don't remember a menstrual party. I do remember being shamed constantly for having a period by males in my life. Treating it as dirty, gross, or a sign I was no longer to be treated as a rational reasonable agent...even tho unlike my brothers and father my puberty never caused aggression nor violence. But sure. We can have a party for y'all too if you think it's necessary.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/26 02:44 PM
16

Me and a coworker had this conversation the other day that people should sort of learn to do the best parts of autistic dating. Like if there's no spark, just say it. If you're not interested in them or what they're talking about show it or say it. Stop wasting months and months being tied up in knots trying to control things for someone you're not even sure you want.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/26 01:12 PM
9

No? My suspicion, and I don't know you, is that your girlfriend felt, wrongly or rightly, that you were a stage five clinger or dysfunctional without her. And that's not healthy ultimately. If I died, God forbid, I want to think my husband will continue on and have a pleasant life. And there are times I worry for him especially socially because he doesn't water other bonds as much as he should. And I could see a discussion someday, where I figure out how to say to him that I'm over the moon for …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/26 04:01 AM
12

I rely on my husband. Emotionally, I need him in the sense that the thought of not having him due to death or divorce makes me want to lay under a bed just crying and waiting for the part where reality reshaped to be different. But if you asked me in like a true survival or such sense if I needed him....well no. And I am glad I can function quite fine without him and that I have him around based on deep mutual want. I've had the dude that seemed to need me and it was icky. Only pets and children…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/26 02:37 AM
10

If we go by laws of the jungle, that's perfectly fine. Women will simply have to begin having the men that make us unsafe done away with. And lest you think we would fail in that, it's doubtful as we would be able to rely on the help of the men we select to favor. That's what unelected men always seem to forget when they say this stuff 🙄
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 06:54 PM
1

No, he doesn't. Read it again.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 06:50 PM
3

Well, I think we can safely conclude the rage over sugar babies and OF by the manosphere will be concluded after this meeting of the minds. I'm a woman, but no, I couldn't be paid for this. Yicky.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 03:38 AM
1

It's time to raise those standards, henny
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 03:31 AM
2

They metabolize alcohol even worse so if you were Asian and she wasn't, you wouldn't sober up faster. Then again, you're both stupid. But if you know you could have said no, you should have.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 10:26 PM
2

I still think it's often under valued as a trait.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 04:11 PM
0

I think it's funny men think they do in most cases. But hey, why do your research when having to use your imagination would be the consequences (the horror).
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 04:00 PM
1

Preaching to the choir.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 01:19 PM
1

We are not. Being Asian would be your only possible out. She's drunk. Her initiating is irrelevant. Say no.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 01:19 PM
0

I'd take that sooner too.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 01:17 PM
0

Statistics. I don't watch.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 01:17 PM
3

Everyone has freedom is the balance. I don't need equal outcomes. And I know people like that. Most are fucking miserable.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 01:16 PM
-1

Not to me. I don't think it should be easy to find the one even for a season or a reason. It would fit my worldview. It ranged quite a bit between looks and personality.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 01:15 PM
2

I uh. Was not using a legal term knowingly. I was saying two people in jeopardy.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 01:14 PM
1

It has never been nice to me to be wanted by a man I did not want in return. If anything, it made me feel more lonely, more isolated, and more like I would not find love. I'm glad if you find a silver lining in it, but I'd rather 7 years between options. It would be safer, easier, and would not make me feel like I'm only attractive to men who are gross. It's almost like different people are different. And trying to go by gender is not the best division.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 02:26 AM
1

I think it's just a woeful lack of education and women like yourself not being forthright in their disgust to their partner. In all of my relationships the men quit porn after seeing my reaction and hearing me talk about the ages most girls begin etc. It wasn't hot or sexy anymore because I took away that. And not in a prudish I'm just not cool with sex way, but in a "this is human drugging and trafficking of children and you feed it rather than use your imagination" way. If you're not cool with…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 02:24 AM
13

When your thumb loves a type of video very very much, a special thing happens...
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 02:16 AM
8

If you're both drunk this is what we call double jeopardy which means everyone is stupid, but no one is evil unless there's some evidence of pre meditation or drugging. The caveat to this is that generally speaking men can drink more than women and also, as far as I know, metabolize it better. So if he sobered up and she didn't before the sex happened, he's got no out. There's also likely no convicting him without signs of force. If only one party has been drinking, the one that did not drink is…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 02:13 AM
23

It has led to more balanced romantic and social dynamics. The fact men may not have predicted this meant they could no longer exploit women's economic disadvantages in order to succeed sexually doesn't seem to be a bug, which is to say: No, I do not believe men supporting this had anything to do with their peens. I think it was the right thing to do and women were not going to let it go. There is no disagreement here. This is equality. I don't care if it doesn't feel equitable to unchosen men or…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 02:08 AM
2

I'm not a hook up girl. But I made out with some stupid choices. I need you to know from the bottom of my feet and hoo hoo that my husband is by far the hottest man I've ever dated. He's the entire top ten.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/26 10:28 PM
0

I feel bad for his plans being ruined and apparently my natural reaction to feeling bad for someone is to say sorry whether I caused them to feel bad or not. He'll tell me I didn't do anything either.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/26 02:45 AM
6

I've told my husband I was sorry about rain before interrupting his plans. I like rain, but I do not control it. And yet I say sorry for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/26 01:18 AM
–

I'm so confused. You've discovered women have social calibration...yes. I also don't swear around my parents and my grandparents I try not to even kiss my husband around out of respectfulness. Mature people know what is appropriate based on circumstances and factors.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/26 11:36 PM
9

As a teacher, confirming 3. Again, especially as a middle school teacher I do not believe fuck um is ever an acceptable answer.... But there's days I'm at my absolute last marble trying to figure out how some of these boys could care any less. I mean genuinely if they actually filled in random answers they'd score higher. If they wrote literally even one sentence for the paper I'd have to give them more points. Like, I have led this horse to water, I have done everything to get it to drink possi…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/26 04:30 AM
3

Easy example: Talking to a childhood friend that's struggling to find a man and wants to end up a SAHM. She happens to be complaining about shoveling snow for her business because of a whole situation with a landlord who has cancer. I know she's next door to a construction team and I happen to know the boss of the operation (older married fella, really nice gentleman). I'm like, go next door, look cute, bat your eyelashes and ask him if he'd have some of his guys shovel for you when it snows. He…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/26 03:35 AM
3

Not at all. I mean he was the first man to listen to my opinions, hear my reasoning, realize it was smart or wise, and then follow through. And the tiffs we have are when it seems like we're agreed on a course of action and then he doesn't follow through. It's also intriguing to me that the moment you heard of a man following through on what was outlined you saw it as slavery...but said you thought you'd be open to an arrangement where a woman tells you the mark and then is semi patient about yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 08:44 PM
3

Could be. I can't say. I married my husband in part because he was the first man to actually enact my advice and do what I wanted and relatively when I said it. And at least half of our tiffs (and they're rare) are a result of him not doing so or not in a timely fashion.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 08:39 PM
3

I think a lot of men think this and I don't think they're lying. But I think very organically they will come to resent her not wanting the "natural" or "authentic" him and expecting him to change. Thus the cruelty or the need to lie to yourself. And also, she will be impatient with this process very likely if it's not shaping up quick. It's just a bad thing. But yes, I do think some men want this in their brains. They just should be careful what they wish for and all that jazz. You're inventing …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 08:31 PM
2

I only ever tell men to date uglier girls to get a better chance at dating anyone. Unlike morons here, I do not believe behavior is skin-deep. Only desperation.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 08:15 PM
6

Women have never seen an ugly truth they can't bend if they like the guy enough. Women often want a man who acts like a man, but refuse to pay that off by acknowledging his manliness and feeding his ego. Put more bluntly, they want a peacock that ruffles out his feathers, but they absolutely refuse to go "wow, what great feathers you have" or "wow, it'd be so nice if you showed me those feathers". And this is mostly because they think it would make them somehow lesser or inferior. And it's destr…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 08:14 PM
3

We have a broad intention for our lives and journey. The initial step is to vibe and keep vibing until we figure out if this dude fits that or not. The only other approach I've seen is women with a plan on how to make any guy fit that mold with enough lying to themselves or cruelty to the man. I've been both. The correct answer is to vibe and have a final place you'd like to end up and see if that dude fits or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 08:12 PM
2

Most of the people I've dated had few if any girlfriends before me....they were also the least eager to please me and told me the most what I would like and what girls in general liked....and that's among the reasons why I never fucked them. If you can't make out well, why would I think you can fuck well? My husband by comparison had girlfriends before me and didn't struggle to get women interested...he was also the most concerned with what I liked or wanted...never once told me and his assumpti…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 08:10 PM
2

I'm so glad you're finally using the correct definition of hypergamy. With that said, I think as a woman who married down in social class, I may have some useful insight to offer. Note, my husband is distinctly from the lower class, while I'm distinctly from the upper middle class although, I admittedly grew up for the early years of my life lower middle class bordering on lower class. My mother was the one who got educated and pulled our family from that mess, so clearly, I have an image of the…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 12:40 PM
5

True. And when I said I wasn't gay, they'd usually laugh and apologize (I had a dramatically short haircut in college because I'd destroyed my hair with bleach and dye) and I've always loved a flannel, so they'd say they got the wrong impression. And then they'd either tuck tail and run or actually just wanna hang out and be friendly/friends because "I seemed like a cool person in class". Can you even imagine the average man noticing someone in class and liking their vibe enough to stay open to …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 02:16 AM
2

No, but I love questions like this naturally. I think it gives great insight to what someone thinks and values. Like I don't think it's an accident my husband and I are married and also both from very different angles valued the punk movement a great deal and had embraced some of the philosophy as a core element of our identity.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 11:59 PM
2

I wouldn't storm out necessarily, but I would know it wasn't meant to be and end it so as not to waste anyone's time. I actually waver on if I think Femme Fatales are real or something men make up to justify their own fantasies and longings. Cleopatra being an example of this tbh.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 11:58 PM
–

I can't say I've ever talked shit about a gal friend's appearance within our friend group. Maybe to my mother, but usually about a friend I was worried about and torn how to talk to about something. But other stuff, yeah. I dunno, once you're close enough with some folks, the relationship is kinda decided and you love each other. But that doesn't stop you being annoyed by them. It's kind of like family in that way. It's all in the family.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 09:52 PM
2

Wasn't Epstein on the books trafficking like....children and teenagers? I'd hardly call this women.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 08:18 PM
7

Spouses are humans, they're going to make mistakes, have bad days, get lazy, give themselves a break at the wrong time, etc. And they're going to nag. It's not a clear sign anyone is a bad spouse to have these kind of tiffs here and there. It's a bad sign when you think of your spouse as nagging and they think of you as someone that needs it for sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 07:01 PM
26

Why isn't he helping care for the baby? I love my husband relaxing in about 95% of circumstances. Usually, I'm right there with him because we both work and both love our home. But there are certainly times for both of us that things are being ignored that shouldn't and it's stressing someone out. Things need to be done and it'll get done eventually is an excuse for one person never doing anything. Ask me how I know (my parents marriage). If life is so stressful you're almost never helping, you …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 01:58 PM
2

The terms of monogamy are complete loyalty through good times and bad. That is the vow. Guaranteed sex when you want it mostly is not in the vows. Doesn't appear. Y'all think these things are equally promised, but they aren't. You think it's implied, but it isn't. If you aren't happy with your sex life and feel that is grounds to break the marriage, divorce. Cheating isn't on the table as an allowed answer based on your promises.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 11:44 AM
1

The award is for going above and beyond that balls ass below hell standard by also not making anyone uncomfortable with their staring or being gross and annoying with their sexuality to the point our media doesn't make other people feel unsafe. You know, the standard men refuse to meet because it's just too hard.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 09:41 PM
2

This is a great quote. I gotta remember this.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 07:25 PM
7

I really don't need there to be some give or take here to fix a lot of problems. Alter education to offer more hands on education and physical opportunities for everyone especially at young ages. Actively encourage and incentivize men to enter teaching and other mentorship professions. Do greater research into therapeutic methods for men. Create and research shelters for homeless and mentally ill men that are capable of accounting for the greater degrees of aggression and violence men who are un…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 06:59 PM
1

They were probably assuming you aren't ugly. If you are, maybe lead with that as the problem. If you are ugly, your only hail mary shot is having a heart of gold, being hygienic, and treating a woman like a human. So it still wasn't the wrong answer. Dude, you know I dunked with this point, go home. If you're suddenly hot and think it's fair that the only requirement to dating is to have a heart of gold, you date a bridge troll. If you acknowledge there's more to it than that, you shouldn't sudd…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 06:49 PM
6

Everyone who does evil does so because of beliefs. They aren't deceived, they're making a choice ultimately.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 04:41 PM
10

I'm a woman and if I saw a dude even get a few sentences into this, I'd walk over and drag you away and tell him to get lost if he follows. And I'd absolutely report him for it to his university. I don't give a damn. No, he is not right. He's a bitter creep blaming a mental disability for his refusal to adapt.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 04:28 PM
0

I mean, if you want to be debated on this point: Why are you salty that being physically attractive is a significant component to sexual or romantic relationships? No, you are not reasonable to think that now you should sneer at all those fools who didn't want you when you were ugly. You were ugly. If you want to prove yourself better than them, you date a bridge troll with a heart of gold. Don't want to do that? EXACTLY.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 04:04 PM
2

Yes, it's unmet emotional needs and narrative goals they have for themselves. Eh, I'm not that prescriptive about what a romantic partner is "meant" to do. I think you can argue especially after a certain point this is unhealthy, but, I don't think it's necessarily there if it's only happening on a low level. I think you raise a valid concern about there not being a solid end-game here. I think they aren't thinking that far ahead which isn't super abnormal. I think a lot of this is subconscious …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 04:02 PM
2

Thank you.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 01:57 PM
6

I think you're sort of onto something in the sense this space contains these two separate men and there is a seeming dissonance in an ideology that can contain both. But it is generally different men wanting different things. The man seeking the mommy is likely dealing with a parental wound or absence...mommy issues so to speak. Although he would never overtly say it, he views himself as an abandoned child in need of love and nurturing and is seeking a woman to provide that which he did not rece…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 12:39 PM
1

I clearly, and I mean clearly stated this was true. I said I could tell the difference even. And my experience is a lot more men are in the "for selfish reasons" camp than the "selfless reasons" camp. But yes, I agree there are a lot of guys like this.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 11:55 PM
1

I generally don't find animations sexy, I know not all women are like me, but I think this is a significant part of the problem. I'd also mention, we'd have to go searching for this niche and that's pretty different than the you almost can't avoid it of male pornography. I also think the idea female sexuality isn't suppressed is uh...well it's interesting to say the very least because that hasn't been my or almost any other woman's experience...thus the entire concept of a slut walk (which I'm n…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 11:53 PM
2

Ahh yes, the usual, so long as they're meeting low minimums of not being a rapist or a sex pest, let's pretend everything is fine. Getting a big fat nope from me. If that's control, women everywhere deserve some sort of award.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 10:32 PM
0

I never recommend the cold approach for a reason. The answer to this is to be the guy you kind of already know she likes. As in, you know she has a crush on you or likes you back. Go for the done deal. All of the problems (or at least 75%) are stemming from dudes going after women who range from absolute strangers to uncertain friends. Sure, I kind of get that. But again, your cautiousness isn't about us, and that's the problem if that makes sense. I can tell when a dude is nervous to make me fe…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 07:17 PM
2

Society gets to decide what to value is my point. It's deciding it values exploitation and thus male sexuality is what is upheld. If something else was valued like harmony, you might find male sexuality was the thing starved and female was the thing which made all the money. And this is basically the argument about patriarchal theory happening. By valuing males, maleness, and placing primarily men in positions of power, you're getting this thing which exploits basically everyone including men. I…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 04:46 PM
2

I'm asking for something shot from a female perspective, appealing to the female perspective, and not containing things that disgust the female perspective. If you're suggesting this doesn't align well with capitalism the way male porn does, good job, you figured out capitalism is a very patriarchal thing I guess? Yes, it is easy to give people things if you're willing to exploit others...but then why are men so comfortable with exploitation is another fair question, right? I think you think you…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 04:25 PM
3

I am a women, and if I thought that had existed, at least pre-marriage, I woulda been into. It does, in creepy ways that are still for men. I'd be looking for non-voyeuristic porn in which I genuinely believed those people wanted to be doing that and were not doing so for survival nor money....haven't seen that yet and I've seen some of the supposedly "romantic" porn.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 04:14 PM
2

Let's say story and context were a key factor of female sexuality....you could make porn containing these things. You'd basically just copy an erotic novel where there's lots of tense moments and longing and relationship development and then you'd do their sex scenes with people who god forbid actually want to fuck and aren't faking their attachment....but this doesn't happen...because female pleasure is still not the point under what I presume feminists would call patriarchy.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 04:03 PM
-2

It was age dependent, but based on my experience it is the most likely explanation. I'm not backwards guessing, I'm guessing forwards from my personal experience. Again, I told you that I can only go based on the person in front of me why he's struggling now. I cannot relitigate the past. That's why I said age was a factor at all. Coming to anywhere online and saying "explain my whole miserable life to me" is insanity and a sign of obsession. Because they are for him...that doesn't mean they are…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 03:59 PM
1

Oh sure, but it's the internet, they have very little to go on. They're giving their best guess based on their interactions with men. Where it's basically like: he wasn't cute to me or seemed like he had some dark shit in there I didn't wanna deal with. I think some of the inability in courtship has roots in things one could deem moral. Which is a bigger conversation, but my experience of dudes who absolutely cannot flirt and are super awkward is that they tend to be kind of neurotically self-ob…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 02:50 PM
-4

I think you seem to think I'm doing some magic trick. It's not. I give him an ocular pat down and if he's ugly in a really objective way, I know it. If he's not and he's just not for me, I assume that probably isn't it. It doesn't take much talking to a dude to detect the other stuff. Yes, again, sometimes it's just attraction. Sometimes it is moral failing. Different dudes. I've seen both and rejected both. You basically have a problem that there are different dudes and you're getting different…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 02:40 PM
4

He is!
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 02:28 PM
3

It comes from a place of deep love and finding my husband precious...and also probably childhood trauma causing fear of that precious thing abandoning me. I'm not pretending otherwise. But, I also think a lot of people are probably like me. They love their romantic partner, fear losing them, and feel they must be perfect in order to keep them happy, and it's hard to be perfect and available all the time so they long for the freedom of no one needing anything.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 02:18 PM
5

It's not amoral and it's not fully moralized? It's somewhere between these two points. And we all know it. I always say life makes sense and so do people. When I meet these stable good dudes you mention, I instantly know why he's not getting me. Sometimes it is he's not my physical cup of tea. And sometimes it really is that I can sense an underlying bitterness or trauma or hatred I'm not interested in being the one to heal. Sometimes it is that he has a lifestyle with no room for me in it. Some…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 02:14 PM
8

I'm happily married, but I entirely get what they mean. You need to imagine I now have someone else (whom I love) that I have to run almost every minor and major decision, event, socialization, and thought by. And I was and am a pretty independent person by nature, it doesn't come naturally to me. It never did. I was the kid who forgot to tell mom things or thought I did or it never even occurred to me to mention and who resented all the oversight. That streak didn't suddenly disappear because I…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 02:03 PM
3

You are arguing with someone who is just thinking of their school bullies that got girls they liked and still with the binary and uncomplicated framework of a middle-high school brain. It's kind of pointless. It's also extremely likely the fact they've held onto this framework points at a form of neurodivergence which makes it incredibly difficult for them to accept people are more complicated than this binary-black & white framework. I know the bullies in our school right now, I'm an adult who …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 11:29 AM
1

Open that the goals and path in life to be more than what you would select for yourself at first choice. Yeah, I think if you fail enough or can't, time to pivot. Edit: just so you know, I don't consider this to be coping. A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 11:45 PM
2

I think all month celebrations are stupid. So on that basis, this one is also stupid. So is pride. So is black history or white history or any history month. It's all stupid. But if those things get to be stupid and in mh face, why not this. What kind of oreos may I expect during nuclear family month? Will McDonalds have a special McFlurry?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 11:43 PM
3

I always hated cold approach. Somehow men have this magical ability to pick the day you feel your worst, look your worst, and have the most going on to try to chat you up at the grocery store or the dollar store or a book store.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 11:39 PM
1

No, but I understand why people go down that sad path and feel like it's legitimate. I began to confront that possibility before meeting my husband and was at peace with it. I found my friends treated me in the ways I wanted, my family while imperfect to the max was solid, I love animals and nature quite a bit, I had a meaningful community, and my hobbies brought me a lot of joy. Life felt like it contained many adventures to be had. So I began to think there was a good possibility I may have to…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 11:37 PM
5

Like many women, I wish this worked. I wish there's something I could wear or do that would prevent objectification, sexualization, or make the content of my character that the content of my blouse. But I've read enough literature to know men will drool over an ankle if the rest is covered. I know that I can literally be in a professional pantsuit that isn't fitted with a bare face and not be taken seriously or have the only thing complimented be my smile. Modesty does not solve this, it just co…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 06:54 PM
–

No one should be given 100% unchecked power ever. Whatever else you wrote is the rambling of your inner demons.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 03:58 PM
2

I do recommend looking for a good relationship, but you should be looking for someone you click with because they are correct a bad relationship is worse than no relationship. And no, you don't have to like being single just because it's better than hell.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 03:55 PM
2

Interesting. I'll have to think about that. I can't say I expected this behavior when I started teaching and yet it was there. They're kids, they're not yet sophisticated in their criminality or bad behavior. It's turned out to be true in nearly 100% of cases. The kids tell on each other like crazy and confirm things. I've yet to see a false accusation. I'm sure you do. I'm not convinced it's real is the problem. School favors those who are quiet and do their work. This so happens to come more e…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 11:22 AM
15

Most people know this. The men here who speak like this feel they will never find that someone or that if they did, she wouldn't want that. So they talk like big Ole grinches. I wouldn't argue with their feelings that this is somehow acceptable. This is just what bitterness and fear does to people
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 01:48 AM
0

You know that in individual reality there is no dating market, right? Like the whole concept of one is applying like an economic or financial model of understanding to a thing which is not at all like that. There aren't pools. There are no bottlenecks. There isn't strategies. There's no onr has ice power and another has earth power. And there's no competition for entry thing. There's two individuals either picking each other or not picking each other. Or one individual saying yes and another say…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 11:15 PM
2

I wouldn't laugh. I'd tell him to leave and save himself. I'd believe approach everything as if he's telling me the truth. My inner belief is a different place than what I enact.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 10:29 PM
-1

I haven't. I'm not discriminatory in action, my inner voice and opinion I do not utter nor enact is.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 10:28 PM
0

I don't disagree. I'm more suggesting a lot of this feels like it gives too much credit and also thinks people are being prescriptive.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 10:27 PM
1

I think when you're below average, man or woman, things will be worse to very terrible for you. It is true the woman will be more desired and the men more rejected. It is not accurate to say these women are being desired in good ways that they enjoy except possibly by other women (and even that could be fairly debated). This leaves kind of a moot point ultimately. Sure, women will be invited more often to be used, abused, and dehumanized. That's not a desirable invitation. Men will receive less …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 06:25 PM
5

I think it's not that thought out, honestly. It's the stereotypes of the genders plus some real life experiences of them. I teach middle school. I believe in sex differences and I invite anyone who doesn't to come shadow me for a week. For me, that whole Louie CK joke about men fuck shit up and women are fucked up is like a daily occurrence. If you tell me a boy vandalized the bathroom and hit someone, I basically believe you without any real doubt. I have to act as if I doubt it for fairness an…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 05:08 PM
1

I'm not ignoring it, I'm saying stop depicting these struggles like this is average. It's OK to be abnormal, you'd still be someone I'd want to help. But part of what is holding this back is acting like this is something normal when anyone reading it knows that's just not true. I'm in no way assuming this is some choice made. I assume most of the men being described are neurodivergent and/or suffering from trauma. But you can't help them if they're insisting this is the norm because those aren't…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 04:58 PM
–

Everyone is the hero of their own story or the wronged victim villain, it is true.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 08:56 PM
2

And you shout like a child. And you cannot read all the times I've explained some very simply things to you....kind of like how they can't too, right? Wait has this just been you looking in the mirror and screaming the whole time? I'm not going back to Rugrats with you, it's above your level and I'm understanding that now. Wow, you're so smart and amazing, it's a total shock that you haven't succeeded in life yet with so much knowledge. It's probably all the other stupid people's fault, right?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 08:54 PM
1

It wasn't selective and you either know it or you're incapable of doing better than this. You deserve what you get from life by your own worldview...I'm sure you're happily relationshipped from all your wisdom...right?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 08:36 PM
2

And yet you have not learned the ability to imagine others complexly yet. And you are right, why should I think I have the magical cheat code to fix you. I don't. I just have the power to piss you off because I'm right, you don't know things you don't know, you're ignorant, and from that ignorance you accidentally practice both cruelty and hypocrisy. I shall leave you to all the kettles you deserve, Pot.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 08:35 PM
1

Children are abusers is basically your stance then. This is more than hard to deal with and you would know that if you'd done it.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 06:51 PM
5

If I'm pointed I'm a bitch. If I demonstrate knowledge in excess of a man I'm being a know it all or too much. If I'm angry or upset I'm menstruating or overly emotional. I'm supposed to look pretty and put together all the time. I'm supposed to absorb a man's bad behavior and I react, my reaction is the problem. I'm supposed to just forgive a man even if he's never said sorry because I know he wishes he hadn't done that and is sorry. I'm supposed to remember special events for people I do not c…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 04:49 PM
2

Answer only this: would you extend that to how I perceive adults? Am I being delusional about adults and trying to maintain their perfection? Am I being willfully ignorant to assume that not everyone is awful? Am I being willfully ignorant to assume some people are having bad days?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 04:46 PM
–

While we're keeping things to ourselves, I'd have kept an inability to identify with child characters to myself as well given that your entire argument rests on the ability to extrapolate information which is not literal. I'm a girl, kettle. There's adults and there's kids in Rugrats, the kids are archetypes much more than they are babies. The show was not for little babies, it was for elementary and middle schoolers. The children are not dealing with baby problems, they're babies dealing with a…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 04:31 PM
–

I must be so blessed I inspired a Lilith post. Either that or I really pissed you off when I clocked you for not knowing shit about what raising a kid is like and called you ignorant. Let me add to it. You're a kettle calling the pot black. I didn't have kids at 12, Lilith. My parents did when they didn't have the time to raise a baby. So I got the pleasure. And no, I didn't have any idea and most people older than me don't. When I watched Rugrats, I identified with the Rugrats because I was fuc…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 02:14 PM
–

32 & 36 married. He makes about 4,000 more than me. We share finances 100%. And I basically run them. We save for retirement, own our home, pay our bills, no debt currently. We go on vacations sometimes and do stay cations when the budget needs it. We have separate credit cards mostly because we haven't combined yet due to him liking his and me liking mine. No children yet.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 01:00 PM
1

We are extremely close and love each other very much. There are elements of raising a child so young and for so long that are a blessing. It is one of the greatest accomplishments and joys I will ever have. It also robbed me of my own childhood and young adulthood. I wouldn't change it even if I could because someone had to do it and he's worth that sacrifice to me. But calling it anything short of an enormous sacrifice grinds my gears. I won't stand by and let anyone pretend that raising kids i…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 12:31 PM
–

Yeah, I kind of figured some would say that. Which sucks because it's the evil answer. And it won't ever be acceptable to me. But. At least we tried to be open to options.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 02:51 AM
13

It's still trying to lift more than it can.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 07:10 PM
2

I was not talking about rape. Try to speak in good faith.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 06:11 PM
21

Sympathize is doing a lot of heavy lifting in that sentence.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 06:02 PM
29

She'll make friends is the difference and women will take her in. Why don't men do the same?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 05:59 PM
4

We disagree clearly. Until you've been in those trenches, you don't get what that is like. You have an idea. You have an image. You have not toiled it and do not know what it takes.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 05:49 PM
125

You did not describe the average man is your problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 05:48 PM
6

You can't prepare for it. That's my point.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 05:29 PM
5

It wasn't a few hours. Both my parents worked. It was from 5am until 7pm every day. I didn't say I baby sat. I said I raised a child. You need to stop.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 05:29 PM
3

You are blessed!
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 05:26 PM
10

The mere fact you compare it to babysitting tells me you don't know what you're yelling about. You being a sociopath explains a lot to me. Carry on!
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 04:21 PM
10

Just say you think men are awful and you hate them, Lil. It'd be quicker. Doctors don't understand this stuff yet, so I think we can give men a break.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 04:01 PM
5

I'm saying this as someone that has raised a child, you don't know. No one does until it is happening to you. It's like you telling me anyone can predict a concentration camp is awful, sure. But the degree and nuance of how is not something you can predict nor understand.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 04:00 PM
2

You're the man OP is right about. And I wish you well with that. I practically raised my little brother starting at 12. I'm not soft, I'm just not ignorant of the cost of children.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 03:09 PM
33

I like, half agree with your premise, but the part where we diverge is that I think let's assume the majority of men actually do love their wives and find companionship with them. They're probably bad at loving her and probably imperfect people, but I do not assume most of them are lying or using cutesy language in the way you suggest. I think what happens here much more realistically has little to do with men at least in some cases: Women's bodies change hormonally quite a bit especially if the…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 11:49 AM
3

I think saying most young people have a strategy is giving them far far too much credit. Eons too much credit. I think most young men are like excited puppies about young women. It's all shiny and exciting. Anything that gives them attention of any kind is the greatest ever. There's no pokemon strategy to this. It's also why they're so devastated whenever any of them rejects him. Puppies don't take no very well either. I do not say this to dismiss their poor behavior, but rather to explain it do…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 11:32 AM
1

In this case, I'm thinking of drug offenses, some assaults, some theft, and in some cases possession of weapons.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 11:29 AM
1

I don't think they think it is...that's the problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 10:25 AM
2

I had to Google and still didn't get very much. Safe to say this woman isn't moving that many units or discourse.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 01:21 AM
7

And yet, the correct advice. It's like back during twilight. Loving it or hating it, you're someone that cares about Twilight and obsessed about it. And that's pretty chill if you liked it. But if you hate something and yet that's all you do is talk about...grrrrlll why you so obsessed with him. Let it go as best you can. Aim for apathy. Go your own way.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 01:18 AM
7

I have a visible disability related to walking and I get up for the elderly, pregnant, or more disabled folks...and I'm very thankful and pleasant to the people who get up for me when I'm the weakest link.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 07:15 PM
0

I'm sorry, I'm just not interested in summoning up old ghosts, not even for the loudest voice about this on reddit. I have really said all I intend to say on this subject. Most of these relationships are not secret and yet the women report being equally damaged if not more so. They could have redirected it by preventing people like that being near me, possibly by denting their head as would be appropriate. And no, I can't say I received support at any point ever following it except from other pe…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 07:02 PM
1

Dude, I'm sorry I'm not proving your narrative. The man had known me since I was 8 and making inappropriate remarks since then. He waited until I was 18. I'd been groomed. Turns out when age is just a number, a lot of people like barely legal or illegal girls. And a lot of men think this is basically ok cuz she's 18. Your standard does not work. It just leads to pain for young women for absolutely no discernable benefit to them. It should be shamed, it should nearly be criminalized, and we shoul…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 05:38 PM
1

My situation was not a partnered one and it was a well guarded secret, like many including people of these kind of ages. So no, no one was wise to it to tell me and the people that were had the "age is just a number" attitude you are sporting.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 05:08 PM
1

Body positivity's movement is currently failing for women and was women led. I think men can also lead a body positivity movement and I think it will also fail, but I'm open to it. I think the dating element is more possible for sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 04:36 PM
9

Red-pill seems to change every single day. It used to be about how to show interest in a woman that they would enjoy....now it's about the opposite? How the world does turn. Why do you think one has that reputation problem? Cuz I know. The language used is way different in such a way that suggests a kind of aggressive disgusted hostility....while the other suggests a defensive hostility...HMMMMMMMM Why do we treat holding a sword as worse than holding a shield as a society?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 01:38 PM
2

I don't want them teaching about that and in my experience, this is fairly overblown at least in my local districts. There's some focus on diversity in literature, but nothing that would really count as hugely agenda pushing. Lgbt is a lot of buzzwording over nothing, I haven't seen any of this kind of diversity anywhere in the curriculums I've read or taught. Mostly, there's safe space stickers everywhere. There's a big difference between saying the gays exist and should be respected and the bl…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 01:26 PM
2

I don't think the reason men here give for not wanting to date a single mother is really the real reason. Sure, there's some validity to the disgust response, but it's not what's really holding them back at least in my opinion having been on the other side of this with single dads trying to date me in a few cases: They're young. You're only young once. You want to have fun. You want to do crazy stuff and stay out all hours of the day and do what you want when you want. You don't want to have to …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 01:24 PM
0

I mean, children are learning from everyone around them all the time. Clearly, parents are likely to play a huge role in this provided they aren't absent. Teachers would generally be the next closest influence. I wasn't inherently thinking of these things because children are going to replicate their parental dynamic and I don't really think school should be teaching about dating anything outside of teaching respect and consent via politeness (stuff like keep your hands to yourself and respect n…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 01:17 PM
1

Other women to women and men to women by behaving poorly at times?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 01:01 PM
1

I wish it could, but no, the age-gap relationship thing is a really unique flavor of being used and manipulated. Every bad relationship can mess you up, but this does the deeper damage than usual. It takes almost a decade to unpack the why, how, and how to avoid.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 12:13 PM
-1

What if women don't need to oppose feminism, they need to support men's rights and social safety net and advocate for them based on loving their fathers, husbands, brothers, uncles, and sons? I could fix so many of the problems I find here without touching feminism: Research and create effective mental health resources for men designed around men. Create effective education for boys designed around boys. Put fathers and male mentor figures in the home and in school especially at the ages when yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 11:34 AM
1

Yes. I've since told young women these things and seen them change. I can see the spell breaking if they're caught early enough in the process. The ones truly partnered up, no, I've seen it take years of being used and abused before they end things and then it takes a few years for them to figure out what the fuck happened to them. But even in these cases, it's where the cracks that will eventually break them out of it begin.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 11:30 AM
1

In my limited experience of observation: they survive better than the relationships which lack respect directed towards the man. I don't think they're happy, but I think they last and are at least mildly fulfilling for those involved. I do not think I would want a relationship in which I did not respect and feel affection for a man. Yeah, they are. None of those things are respect. They are affection + consideration. Again, if your mother or father could be found doing them for you when you were…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 11:25 AM
1

...I said I was like the women in his life - the non western ones. I just so happen to be western so I'm also not what he's describing and it was not motivated by respect... I was an illustrative example for both things not being true. Yes, that is a great thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 11:04 AM
1

I'm a school teacher. I've had students listen already. Shit, by the time I was 22, I'd already helped some younger women. It's not perfect, but it does work.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 11:01 AM
0

Who would you like to teach them and what does that include teaching them, and how do you think it would help?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 11:00 AM
10

scratches head You know a cougar is a predator right and it is almost always said with derision. With that said, I was a young woman preyed on by an older man and creeped on by many others. And God do I wish there had been women around to shame them or protect me at my youngest, most trusting, and stupid. I wish someone had been around to make the case to me and explain the things I needed to hear about old creepy predators and myself. What might my life have been if I just had seen a bunch of w…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 02:49 AM
3

No. Just no. No. Nein. This should remain between you, your hand/s, the good people at Jergens, and the puff tissue box.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 02:13 AM
15

I'm always curious which accommodations you would like to see made for men?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 02:11 AM
0

Does he actually love her back?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 01:45 AM
1

These are men so desperate to believe they merit respect from women that they'll see it anywhere they can. Like did your mommy respect you when she cut the crusts off your sandwich? When she bought you a beyblade? No, she didn't. These are actions of love, not of respect.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 01:22 AM
0

I'm sorry you don't understand illustrative examples, man. Those actions are affectionate ones, not respectful ones. And you'd know this if you'd been respected and thus had experienced the respect flavor.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 01:20 AM
2

I'm the main cook of our house and yes, I buy him things although we share finances so it's not a money thing. No, I think a man is insane to think the above are acts of respect. It's like asking me if I think ketchup and mustard can go on a hot dog. Yes, but I don't point at the yellow stuff and call it ketchup. See my ketchup and mustard metaphor. Women are not cooking or buying shit out of respect. Those actions are not demonstrating respect. These are affectionate acts. It is not my perspect…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 01:18 AM
19

With all the respect there is to be had for LBH, you are not describing respect, you're describing at best affection. I know because I've always cooked and given gifts to the men I was romancing. It's affectionate. The only man I've dated that I respected was my husband. The others I saw as almost child-like. I adored them or liked them, but respected...no lmao. I did not esteem their qualities or admire them. If you're asking me to guess why you are seeing this difference in affection: because …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 05:03 PM
–

I was speaking to who I was speaking to that is, I believe, married and happy with his partner. If that isn't you, go back. ....feminism is pretty much just letting women do the producer role. Society still does not value social reproduction and feminism really doesn't fight for it to as much as it could beyond platitudes.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 04:32 PM
–

Women complaining are inherently not the same group as women succeeding tho...right?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 01:10 PM
2

I think most people who cheat fit into two semi-overlapping categories: People who cheat because of whim. This is to say, they don't hate their partner, they love their partner, they'd never want to hurt their partner, but the moment struck and they made the wrong choice. Miserable people who hate their partner and/or themselves and are looking for an out or another way to self-harm/self-destruct. From this, I determine the underlying cause to be something like poor self-control or poor problem …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 12:44 PM
–

So, I have mixed thoughts on this. I think why you do things matters. And I think why people do things is often contradictory and complex. And I think the outcomes matter too. I think if you're doing anything with your appearance whether it's heels, lifts, wigs, make-up, booty this, or cosmetic surgery that, the absolute best case scenario is that you're doing this simply because you like how it looks, it reflects your inner vision of yourself, and it brings you joy. I think the worst case scena…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 12:31 PM
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I understand you find this contradictory, and I understand your perspective. Here's what I'm trying to clarify then: People can only speak about the matches they are interested in having or they are dealing with. Everything else may as well not exist. If you told me 75 year old men wanted a committed relationship with me at 24, this would be a non-sequitur. If you told me snail goo covered convicts did, same thing. Yes, these are men, but they are not in my dating pool and what is more, I do not…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 12:03 PM
3

My husband is confident, I would say more so than most men. Although, I admit, I don't think that's very difficult given that as you've suggested, most people are not confident and I would say most men are especially not in our generation. Is he more confident than I am? No, I would not say so. I'd say equally confident to me and if pushed, I'd say we're confident in very different ways and lacking in confidence in very different ways. And if you really pushed me to give a binary answer, I'd hav…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 11:54 AM
1

I think men are more willing to compromise and go without it because they believe they are better suited to endure what happens when you're dealing with an insecure or low-confidence person. (Which in certain ways is true and in others is woefully misguided and causing them extreme emotional damages.) I don't think it is low on their list of desirable traits at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 11:45 AM
1

Oh, I totally agree with you. But, I'm saying even if we assume this is coming from some sort of frail place, the frail place isn't insecurity, it's decision fatigue and caring plenty about others.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 11:41 AM
9

I love that deciding dinner is a confidence issue in your world. Cracked me up. It's about decision fatigue combined with wanting to be sure others are pleased. What do you think I did when I was single? Wander in the woods hoping to find a confident man to tell me to get sushi? I know what I want and like and when I don't I still manage to find something I enjoy. Confident people like themselves or believe in themselves. They make you believe their bullshit. That's why women like them. And thei…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 03:23 AM
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I'm not seeing the contradiction...one seems to explain the other. Most men are incompatible, creepy, or come off as if they'd like casual sex that becomes a committed relationship. Women experience this and then complain about it. Or, and this is a, in some ways kinder explanation: those men aren't desirable at all for a relationship or anything so that's why no matches.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 03:11 AM
2

I'm not a sides person, I'm an issues person and I'm generally guided by being torn between what is gentle and kind to hurt people and what is true and protective. It's a hard path to try to live between these things because it's basically a series of ethical dilemmas with no clear right answer.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 06:55 PM
3

It's a sad state of affairs. And women do break our rules from time to time especially when young. And sometimes it goes beautifully....often it doesn't.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 04:54 PM
1

I actually suspect this would more or less work because the energetic ambitious guys would have lots they were pursuing that would keep them from the sort of dismal attitude of the mediocre, apathetic, and boring dudes. I think women depending on their personality would greatly suffer under this due to being torn between people pleasing someone boring and being energetic and ambitious themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 02:41 PM
5

What would this look like in your mind? Because in my mind I did want a husband so I had to date. So I took precautions: Make sure multiple people know who I'm going out with, when, where, and how long it will reasonably last. Don't go out with strangers or cold approaches, actually know the person. Drive yourself and leave by yourself. Casually mention having a psychotically obsessed mother who will kill them at least once during the date and an Uncle that will bury them on the farmland homeste…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 11:56 AM
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I'm confused what you mean. I'm saying those are a great thing to do early on to introduce yourself if you're living a creative and exciting life.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 10:19 AM
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Seriously, some of the best mates I've had through various seasons of life could have been argued to have begun as quasi dates. Yeah, the romance didn't work, but we had a blast together enough to keep hanging out as friends for years after. Fond memories.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 03:03 AM
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Dating is about being yourself, but, there are better and worse ways to introduce yourself so to speak. My first date with my now husband, we got pizza, which is his favorite food and it was very kind of thrown together last minute, but super fun and cute mostly because they kicked us out we'd been there so long. The second date, he took me offroading for several hours and then we got ice cream. I'd never been, but was interested and it was a huge part of his life that certainly impressed me and…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 03:00 AM
7

No, it doesn't. You think women are masking something or hiding something. I'm saying it's all there. Men in these spaces have redefined hypergamy from describing how women mate across and up social hierarchies to "any time a woman wants good things from a man it's hypergamy and they have to hide it by talking about feelings". They aren't hiding it. You need a conspiracy because of your insane redefinition. No woman is hiding she wants a hot, financially stable guy who is fun and kind to her, bu…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 01:22 AM
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Never did casual sex per say, but all of the making out with a guy I wouldn't in a million years take seriously never included alcohol, it included the death of a beloved childhood pet and a breaking point dealing as the go between in my parents crumbling marriage and learning my father hadn't been super faithful to my mother. That's why I say it's always drugs, alcohol, or trauma.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 12:21 AM
5

When you're the gender that houses and births at great personal sacrifice and peril a child which is in the species born helpless and in need of great care for approximately the first 3 years of life.... Wanting someone who is capable of more than taking care of you, well-liked by the community, powerful, and capable of intimidation is self-care and love. I won't even bother to defend attractive, yeah, women want a guy they wanna fuck. Now that's hypergamy too? I'm beginning to think hypergamy i…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 12:15 AM
5

We disagree. If you would agree to pick one you wouldn't be having these problems. If you would agree to be a gay bestie you'd be fine. If you'd agree to quickly fuck dudes, you'd be fine. Your problem is combining too many contradictory things at once.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 05:49 PM
6

No, I'm denying that's what is causing your situation. Not that it exists. It's just not what is getting you.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 05:40 PM
5

Why do you think this is and what do you think could be done to change this?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 05:37 PM
9

I don't think it is. It's gay dudes believing strictly in let's fuck why don't you want to fuck, gay dudes fuck let's fuck. And for women, it's that you're acting like a girl and looking like one, so we assume you're gay. Doesn't really come from gender roles so much as that's what everyone thinks femboys are. Straight femboys have to be rarer than rare. You're a unicorn, people don't get it.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 05:34 PM
11

So, I'll bite the bullet. Your problem likely with a significant amount of this, and I am not saying this to be hateful or bigoted or racist, it's pretty much statistical fact, is that you're Indian...and worse you're apparently a mild cliche of one. For whatever reason, you just aren't that appealing a prospect to women from other cultures and the women from your culture unless they're very traditional want to date a white dude. So your perspective is gonna kinda be skewed from what most men ar…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 05:32 PM
2

I believe I am doing human flaws with a feminine skin. It's like a video game. I want the pink one applied to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 05:23 PM
7

I'm not saying you're not. I'm saying you don't fit in an easy box for others. You're a feminine dude, so girls are naturally assuming gay and then you try to date them which throws them off because that isn't their box for effeminate dude. In queer male spaces, they're used to generically a more quick ride to pound town and when this is rejected, they're behaving awfully because you don't fit their box of an effeminate dude. This is the consequences of not neatly fitting into how the thing you …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 05:22 PM
4

I wouldn't want to be compared to a man and I don't hate men. It's that I'm a girl and I want my flaws to be feminine too. Wanting to be perceived as what you are isn't necessarily caused by hate. And even if it was...is your goal to communicate or not?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 04:44 PM
7

They act a lot like people. Saying they're acting like women is a covert insult to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 04:24 PM
3

This is a problem of the human condition...you're just on a male centric sub so you're getting the men's end of it. Go to a female sub and you're going to see the same thing. It's people under-valuing others while over-valuing themselves while thinking they're the only ones with problems and refusing to allow others to have them. Everyone needs a mirror and everyone hates to look in them.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 04:16 PM
7

I think this cuts both ways is the problem. I know so many women who are their own worst enemy on the dating front. They make themselves almost impossible to love by the men they'd actually like a relationship with. This is just the human condition to complain about being your own worst enemy. And, I think we can have compassion for people doing this while also trying to give them helpful critique.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 04:13 PM
6

I look at it like this: humans like things which they understand and fit in expectations and binaries they like based on their culture and the wider mainstream culture. Humans generically dislike and fear that which is other. The more otherized you are, the more you are being tolerated to barely tolerated which is what you're referencing as performance. You are not being enjoyed or desired. This is true regardless of the space. Conservative spaces have expectations. Progressive spaces do as well…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 04:11 PM
2

I would conjecture the reason they have not succeeded where others do is not caused by their weight, but likely personality or more generic ugliness. Either way, the people telling them it's their weight aren't on the money.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 04:03 PM
1

But they aren't is the problem. I have many fat women friends, most are dating or marrying fit men...
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 02:37 PM
5

I didn't understand and I'm asking you to expand upon your explanation.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 02:18 PM
2

His jaw is doing everything. He's not doing nothing. The thing he's doing is maintaining a gorgeousness good enough to be all the other shit. And, if we're being frank, he's a hugely hard working actor with multiple hobbies...so he's also kind of succeeding at all the other stuff. He's probably a better woman than I am too. He's not half-assing anything or he wouldn't be where he is.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 01:44 PM
1

Sexual assault and not enjoying sex are different things, and I think you know that. Again, good faith. Most men believe they aren't assaulting anyone (and this is accurate) and they believe women are enjoying that sex because women are faking it convincingly. They also believe the dangers of pregnancy and STDs will fall on both of you equally. So when they propose sex, they think it is an equal proposition. IS this accurate? NO. But we can understand why they think so and the answer is to educa…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 01:43 PM
4

I'm not seeing how this connects. Could you explain this more for me?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 01:38 PM
1

That's cuz his jawline pulls his weight. It seems like your idea of pulling weight is "women have some reason to stay in a relationship with you".
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 01:37 PM
7

Multiple things can be true. It can be true heavy beauty standards are put on women and that she's meeting some or none of them and that those standards are still a burden. Yes, men give them those relationships. Again, this seems like a problem with your team, not women. It's not really entitlement if you can actually do it. It'd be like telling someone who can dunk in 90% of cases that they're entitled to dunking...like, no, they just do it so much that it's rare they don't. Same for fat chick…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 01:36 PM
1

Well think in good faith for a second. They think the sex is mutually gratifying...because women aren't telling them it isn't. They think it's equally safe, because women aren't telling them it isn't until recently and they tend to deal with risk better. They think they're bringing companionship and romance, which a lot are so big ups to that. Ok, so clearly men are capable of a good committed and shared burden relationship. I think any man more or less is. SO if a man isn't meeting this standar…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 01:23 PM
3

Women want either, dude. I know women. Most of the women I know just want someone to love who will carry their weight.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 01:18 PM
1

You know that means women mating across and up social hierarchies.....right? Women don't date down as often (although this is necessarily changing). So women are having trouble finding men equal to them is your point?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 01:14 PM
26

I don't think this is that hard: why do women outside the "traditional beauty norms" still have access to sex. Yes, thank you, it's because those men are desperate for sex and will accept just about anyone, even women they don't like and will devalue and disrespect the moment they finish jizzing. Imagine the entitlement of I should be able to jizz in you and also loathe you for not being everything I want. And then you're saying the women who are non-traditionally beautiful are entitled for thin…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 01:12 PM
4

You know men ultimately have to select you, right? My husband selected me as much as I selected him. The fact many men would select more women than the opposite doesn't change this binary fact. Yes, more men would select me. That's kind of irrelevant if I would select none of them which was the case. If anything, it becomes the noise that gets in the way of finding someone you would select or worse, trauma that makes it hard for you to trust the men you would select. I think some of this is just…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 01:06 PM
1

I don't think men see themselves as bringing less to the table. I also don't think women dating good men see those men as bringing less to the table inherently. But I think this is very relationship focused and I think it's unfair to suggest within relationships one is bringing more or less and if they are, you should leave and find someone you don't feel like going tit for tat with because they're meeting your standards. In some ways, I would say this is a responsibility gap issue for a lot of …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 12:56 PM
1

This is a very complex thing, but no, society isn't assuming people should be comatose. It's assuming that people will be self-interested and self-destructive, and that you need to create incentive structures that push people to behave well. The original post is predicated on this, otherwise, why aren't men just working and shutting up? Are they lazy or something? I'm taking the original post in good faith that it is reasonable for men to want things like family, sex, and respect apparently from…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 12:47 PM
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I know, that's why I didn't report it. I figured you were just being a little silly while making a point. My saying everyone here is fuckin nerds was kind of similarly light in tone. Like, we're on a men feel like they're failing sub. The venn diagram of that sub and people that watch the boys is a circle.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 12:37 PM
1

Women can do the work, so that also isn't leverage? And men cannot have babies? It's also not about leverage. It's about admitting ALL of the work required to run a society. Anyone can do all of the work, except having kids that is female exclusive. Yes, they can. They also aren't generally male exclusive? I think you're misunderstanding me, dude. Yes, basically anyone can do social reproduction with some caveats. The point is we don't call it work or reward it as work or respect it as work beca…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 11:18 AM
1

You are doing social reproduction, sir. Good. Men of previous generations and some of the current one didn't. And without it being done, the system would, indeed, collapse. Yes, as the video suggests, calling what women traditionally did sources of joy and fulfillment was the way not to pay them for what is work. Yes, I do. And I love him dearly, but love in a committed relationship is not always a joy or fulfillment because I too am a selfish and flawed person who does not always wish to listen…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 10:04 AM
1

I haven't heard this trending and I'm pretty keyed into being a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 01:45 AM
2

I'm really trying to see this as worse and I need it explained. These women clearly heavily dislike especially sex with men and the violence some men commit and others dismiss. But I I'm not seeing any calls to like, control them, exploit them, or abuse them... Like it seems strange to compare these things to me. It's like the worst thing you find women on average doing is suggesting men are beastly and therefore should basically be avoided. I'm not a fan, but, that's just not so bad as suggesti…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 01:44 AM
1

I mean I feel things, like I feel like all of this is small potatoes compared to describing the desire to adopt a girl child so you can be sure your wife is a virgin. Or you know, Andrew Tate describing in detail how to use sex to mentally abuse women. Or you know, Fresh and Fit telling men to try to go after young women so they can get one sided monogamy and control their wives. You know it just feels like one of these things is actually damaging and the other is...mean at worst?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 11:28 PM
2

https://youtu.be/FkuW7uKG6l8?si=psazXmrOi7agefUM
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 11:25 PM
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All the men I know have a diversity of hobbies....
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 10:16 PM
0

I mean, two of those just look like women saying they're the choosers and are choosing no one because men suck. I'm not seeing that being very bad? The other, I assume is a joke, but I can agree a very poor taste one that reveals real contempt that is ugly.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 10:12 PM
2

I went and looked and I really didn't see anything that bad. Maybe I didn't scroll down enough, but it mostly seemed like women glad they aren't fucking men or being in relationships with them. Sprinkled in was news stories about awful things men have done.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 10:02 PM
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No you aren't allowed to break the law because I'm rolling my eyes and acting arrogant? Also, bold of you to assume any of you are Billy Butcher when all the evidence is to the contrary. You're all big fuckin nerds or you wouldn't be here. It was one of the most popular shows of the last 3-5 years so even if you weren't all big fuckin nerds, you'd still probably know who the lead draw in character of the show was. He was pretty big as a gif reaction across reddit for awhile.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 09:55 PM
2

I agree with your take that it's a good vibe check...the problem is that a lot of the music coming out of female pop artists has both I love him I love him and I want to murder him vibes in it. I think this may have always been more or less the common feeling about hetero relationships from the female perspective. I'm a big pop listener and I can't say it has changed much since I was 10 or so. Maybe the only big alteration is men's music getting slightly nicer?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 09:51 PM
0

I'll take a gander, but are there calls for violence and manipulating men to do awful things they hate? I was giving an example.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 09:45 PM
1

I mean, I suppose I could see that perspective if women weren't in committed relationships with them. You know kind of like how girls love their horses.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 09:45 PM
6

I'm not saying women's echo chambers can't be bad places for toxicity and reinforcing biases...I'm just curious for real examples of this. Chappell Roan is a lesbian, so I think she gets a free pass to be spreading negativity about men stealing her bisexual girl crushes. Charlie XCX is well, a bratty figure built on saying controversial things and doing them so again, the men thing isn't her brand. Sabrina Carpenter is the only one you kind of can go in this direction with, but she's also intens…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 07:14 PM
10

Yeah.... I also laugh to encourage people to keep talking or because I recognize they were joking and trying to be funny so it's polite to do. Basically, I don't think someone laughing is the best metric to judge someone being funny.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 04:07 AM
10

I laugh a lot. Not always because something or someone is funny. I'm a nervous laugher. A lot of women are like me.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 03:32 AM
1

A good deed is its own reward. You're allowed to want greater rewards, but the moment you stop wanting to be good cuz the rewards weren't there, you're a bad person.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/26 11:43 PM
2

Not what I said at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/26 12:55 PM
10

Yes, because individuals dating is the same as companies and society? Come on, I'm a libertarian and even I think this is a stupid comparison.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/26 03:37 AM
8

Seriously. My husband had to get a tuxedo for our wedding and decorate. Love him to pieces, but I think maybe men should pipe the fuck down on their experience organizational skills cuz my husband is the only man who ever organized a date better than picking a pizza place. And nothing to ever even marginally compare to the wedding. Shit, I've done more work setting up our ROTH IRAs than he did planning our first date for pizza.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/26 03:13 AM
8

To clear this up as a random blonde Russian influencer queen said (yes, all great wisdom is said by blonde Russian doll-like women in fabulous bathrobes). I do not expect a man to pay, I always have my own money. But I will continue to date the man that will. I do not expect a man to plan and organize an experience, I will simply choose the man that will. I do not expect a man to perform or prove his value. I will simply choose the man that does. And look, I'm here for you boys, I understand And…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/26 03:10 AM
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Interestingly, I feel like most of the women I know who did find a man, it happened when they stopped buying at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/26 02:54 AM
5

I saw them as people. People I didn’t want sex nor long term romantic companionship with nor financial partnership. Although I despise the metaphor. When you apply for sex, you need to bring qualifications. If you don't have the qualifications, you don't get the contract. When you apply to be a romantic partner, you're also applying to be an emotional and financial partner and potential child-rearing partner. If you don't have the qualifications, you don't get the rose. That doesn't mean you are…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/26 02:31 AM
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Not even gonna bother since I'm not a feminist and the tone of engagement tells me you aren't coming in good faith. Enjoy your report for ad hom. Work on good faith engagement in discussion.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/26 02:20 AM
6

Not a Marxist. I pull ideas and concepts I think usefully explain reality. I think this one usefully explains a certain dynamic between men and women of particularly bygone eras. Having raised siblings at a young age because of some elements of this dynamic run amok, I do not see simply having children or lots of them as the best metric.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/26 02:17 AM
6

Every society eventually has a women's rights movement. It bothers me too. So women don't endure this scam forever. Longer than they should, sure. But not forever.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 07:36 PM
9

The incentive to produce is the pay and benefits employers give. Men are basically upset there's no longer the extra fringe benefit of a slave class doing their social reproduction on top of this. There's no icing on their cake anymore. Women are now able to essentially determine their cost, and they're determining it ain't something you get cuz employed. *** Their employers pay them. That is what they are entitled to. Not family, women, nor social reproduction. If they don't like this, leave th…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 07:07 PM
21

My husband hears I had a bad day at work and brings me home my favorite slushy sometimes and then gives me a foot rub and makes us both up a buldak ramen with spam. I love him. He's a great partner. We're rarely asking for someone to take over and renovate Constantinople. We usually just want to know someone is in it with us and cares enough to make a real effort to make things a little easier.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 06:56 PM
7

I see most of this as empty threats by someone trying to trick me and my gender into thinking we have to wind back the clock to benefit them at our own expense. But I'm unphased, the majority of men adapted to a more equitable scam. The ones who refuse will withdraw their support and society will survive without them as it has always done.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 06:51 PM
3

It's pretty long for a definition.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 06:48 PM
9

Again, clearly, we're not going to fold on this. It's not a bluff nor is it a fantasy. We're forcing the issue and we're prepared for society to fail. We're not going back to the bottom rung of the scam. We're willing to settle into the producer rung with light social reproduction to serve ourselves. If society fails, it fails. And I don't really believe it will fail for the record. I believe we will continue to evolve and adapt and that the men panicking are doing so because they're an evolutio…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 05:21 PM
8

It is no longer devalued as something women are inherently meant to be doing and thus rejecting something inappropriately. In turn, they must value and show respect for anything they receive in this domain rather presume it is something their mere biology entitles them to. It turns their attention to the real enemy, which is wealthy elites, which is who is typically refuse to pay for social reproduction and scamming men and all producers.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 05:12 PM
3

Number of children is a useless metric. End of discussion.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 05:02 PM
10

I did at the end, silly goose.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 05:01 PM
14

Women get to decide what is in their self-interest. If they don't feel children are included in that, it is their decision. All society can do is figure out how to change that math for them if indeed it is agreed children are vital. It is interesting only the men (the ones who do not have the children nor do the bulk of the work raising them) believe they are mutually beneficial and in everybody's interests. It's also interesting that women (who both physically sacrifice their bodies for them an…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 05:01 PM
17

My sum up: Women realize they are being exploited and disrespected for free labor by both men and the wealthy elites exploting men and stop accepting this treatment and choose instead to be paid for their labor by becoming producers. This leaves a natural vacuum in the shape of the free labor they used to provide that is still highly necessary. Men, the primary benefactors of this free labor are upset because they used to be exploited, but receive free labor benefits. They are beginning to quest…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 04:56 PM
8

As I told someone else, you can't say no one told you the problem anymore. Now you understand the scam at least, you are allowed to deny it or disagree. All the women I know in egalitarian relationships, myself included are having children currently. The ones who are not are dealing with infertility or in some rare cases never wanted them at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 04:47 PM
6

If you want a simple one: Compensate women for having and rearing children. Lionize motherhood the same way we lionize a great inventor. The only women I know regularly handing out sex (myself included) are either in egalitarian relationships, are girl bosses (so not dominated), or are being compensated poorly by the government to be mothers. Do I have evidence that bad boys don't always win everything? I'm not married to one and no one I know is. I am addressing that. Your problem is caused by …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 04:34 PM
5

If no one has the children, what happens? If women don't have sex with men apparently it all goes to shit as is the premise of the original post. So apparently, someone does need to do this job or society falls apart? Society doesn't function if women refuse to do the social reproduction...but it doesn't deserve compensation? I don't think you have a sensible or honest position here, sir. If you accept the premise of the original post, you are forced to admit women's social reproduction is vital…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 04:28 PM
8

I'm aware. But, on the bright side, now they can never say no one told them about the scam and the solution.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 04:08 PM
2

Hey, fair enough. I don't need you to believe me.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 04:07 PM
6

I did not call for more egalitarian men necessarily, it is among the options to share the burden of both social reproduction and production and respect both as valuable. Why does this lead to more sex for men, because sex is a element of social reproduction (biproduct may be a better word). If social reproduction is compensated and respected, women will do it more. They stopped because they figured out the scam. They are running out of wives to beat, this entire complaint is that men are not rec…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 04:06 PM
6

I mean, my understanding is you have those things already, so clearly you succeeded within the current so called hellscape. If you're asking how does this help the men who are not succeeding in the hellscape: if social reproduction (the traditionally feminine role) was appropriately compensated and respected, it seems likely they would go back to doing it. And social reproduction is inherently about supporting a family, a provider, and likely sex. The problem currently is no one wants to do soci…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 04:02 PM
16

They are both people's children and the future of society. What has happened with this job being disrespected and devalued? Women stop doing it altogether which is self-interest which makes way more sense than suggesting cleaning or child-rearing is. Now, instead, women choose to do something valued and self-interested - work. And who is complaining about this arrangement? Not women is the answer. It's men. Women need not sacrifice for society if there is no respect nor pay. They can just do wha…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 04:00 PM
2

I wish. I really wish. I've been playing magic the gathering for 25+ years. Ask me how many dudes that can barely untap their lands are trying to teach me the game or tell me what's a good card. My favorite is a guy that knows I'm an excellent chef and then asks for cooking advice only to start telling me how to do something extremely basic.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 02:29 PM
54

I think you may get a lot of insight into this from "A Man Plagiarized My Work" by Philosophy Tube. To give you my understanding of the TL:DR: You are correct, society (wealthy elites) run a scam in which they basically define manhood as production (doing shit for society much of what you outline) and everything they do, they call work. However, built into a man's ability to do work is a whole is something called social reproduction, which is all of the labor which allows work to happen (think y…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 02:24 PM
5

I sort of agree that Red Pill operates on some faulty presuppositions, I just don't agree with you what those are. I think its greatest flaws begin in their perceptions of women and their sexuality. Frankly, they kind of feel like they've been made up by a middle school boy who only ever studied them behind glass and had to wear an eye patch and an ear plug. By way of example: Most women are not and never really have been that interested in casual sex. This is a fraction of a fraction of a minor…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 12:36 PM
2

I'm happy for us to return to a religious atmosphere which teaches people they will be rewarded in an eternal afterlife for their good deeds here on the earth. And perhaps we can give out a good boy cookie too.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 11:23 AM
0

They aren't. They are using character to mean how fun are you.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 11:22 AM
5

It's not extreme at all what I'm suggesting. You used the word harassed, I basically agree on a small level that is what it is if the attention is unwanted. What I'm pointing at is that the way you're framing this to us is basically something like "I have this end goal (getting a girlfriend) and in order to achieve this goal, I'm willing to make others (women) suffer for entirely my benefit. And that's just how it has to be". This is a pretty callous way to approach life and problems. It also se…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 02:53 AM
3

I'm not responding to the individual, I'm responding to the situation of being harassed by men. He is just one of many. Similar to how in your world men are responding to their need to find a woman by harassing all women. He doesn't care about the individual and neither do I in this scenario.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 02:15 AM
0

Haven't seen it. But ok. Guess we have different experiences.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 01:46 AM
1

I've communicated with my husband. Sometimes people are selfish anyway. But when he's selfish I don't get off... Maybe there should just be admittance an orgasm gap occurs and it's caused by bad behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 01:46 AM
5

Let's pretend this is true: Am I finally allowed to react like I'm being harassed? Can I show overt disgust? Can I say weird cruel shit. Can I loudly exclaim a man is making me uncomfortable? May I basically react like Homelander to every unwanted approach which is all of them because I'm married?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 01:44 AM
1

I'm sorry, but no they dont on the mansplain front. I've been enduring that my whole life. Men with no business talking in every hobby or community I've ever been in zero in and start explaining the most insufferable and basic ass shit to a woman. And I get it, they're trying to impress her and start a conversation. But it is an annoyance no man has ever had to endure. They would never want to nor dare talk to a random man like this. Nerd communities are the absolute worst and gym communities ar…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 01:39 AM
1

My husband has massively more experience than me... << and he's not getting me to the promised land every single time. His batting average is like 90%. Being fair, 5% of that is hormonal or anxiety driven. Although, tbf, he likely wanted the sex and I likely didn't feel like turning him down because I fancy him so much and wax hopeful it might actually go well. But that leaves 5% where I'll say it, I think he gets kind of lazy or overly excited and his ego is a little too involved to fully hear …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 01:28 AM
2

There is unless you're here to say it's all looks: Is he fun? Does he make me laugh? Do I feel safe around him? Does he make me feel special? Is he pleasant to me and others? Is he likable? Can he charm me? Is he clever? This is character and frankly, it is also a part of being nice. And honestly, there is a minor moral component to ensuring others feel comfortable around you. Sure, you can be a good man despite being the equivalent of the awkward and uninvited spirit of death in a corner, I'm n…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 01:22 AM
1

Not a feminist, also don't think most feminists are talking about this. Also don't think men are gaslit that being fun is a pretty huge factor here.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 01:15 AM
0

I just said morality was not a decisive factor...put your dick away.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 01:14 AM
1

Ok, not been my experience, but, I'm assuming you're going to reference some baby fever or biological clock?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 01:13 AM
3

We do in other ways, you know, prison, jail, people not wanting to be associated with immoral types, generic shaming, myth, school, cultural norms implanted during childhood. I think there's enough there, I don't think access to women and their favor needs to be on the list. Historically, the most "moral" were celibate for a reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 01:12 AM
5

I answered someone else this, so you basically get the same: Good is doing a lot of heavy lifting here, but none of it is really about morality for the most part. It's about being fun, interesting, a solid emotional partner, not boring, tedious, unpleasant, or ill-tempered. Basically, stop being a sex pest and have an actually pleasant interaction. I've never asked any struggling men those questions. Maybe red pillers ask those questions, but I highly doubt your seasoned feminists or almost any …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 07:04 PM
-1

I think men misunderstand this critique very often when they confuse morality with entertainment. They are boring or tedious or disagreeable or unpleasant. The way it is said, I agree, typically makes them think it is about being a bad person. But, most of them are likely morally ambiguous. Neither notably good nor notably bad. Lacking much of a moral compass.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 06:43 PM
2

For what are they paying money? A good, a service?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 04:30 PM
3

O_O What are you even referencing? And I'm the ridiculous one, stretch before you reach sir.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 04:18 PM
4

They paid. If they didn't pay they're the same as sub women. But if they paid, they're in charge. Money means you're the person with the power. This is fairly simple.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 03:55 PM
12

I think you win the too much internet for the day award, dude. Unless you can find me mainstream feminists calling for this outside of the context of Row Vs. Wade in which they do not mean it, they are trying to highlight the discomfort we feel with controlling men's bodies, I mean someone who genuinely thinks we should do this that's a feminist and well respected.... Too Much Internet.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 03:25 PM
20

I largely agree, but I do want to say two things: This applies less and less the older you are. By that stage people have been hurt more so they're more guarded with their true feelings and desires generally. This isn't a sign they don't like you, it's a sign they know where that has gotten them in the past and are trying to make a new choice. Women (generally) are going to be more guarded sooner due to dealing with childhood creepiness and societal messaging about not showing too much interest …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 02:41 PM
13

The problem is that people who think like this see being good as something which should be rewarded (I blame school) rather than something which is right in and of itself regardless of reward. So when good behavior doesn't get them everything they wish for, it seems like a systemic and moral wrong rather than what has always been and always will be. Being good is about being good. Not getting a reward.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 02:38 PM
10

The person paying has the power, homie. It's his fantasy. He's the burger king. Sub women ain't generally paying for this, that's a pretty big difference don't you think? And subs can say what they want, they're under a dom's power no matter what they may preach. That's why abuse is so fucking common in those dynamics. Matches are like wishes, they're only useful if they come true, which they rarely do because most people aren't matches. I'm lucky I found my guy after enduring a lot of pain from…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 02:28 PM
1

We can take this outside, cuz I will fight on this hill xD
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 02:19 PM
14

Soft Power and Power Power are different. Power Power is taken without the consent of the person controlled. Soft Power requires the consent of the person controlled. The power you are attributing to women is the "siren call" so to speak and while I totally believe based on the arts and humanities alone this is a very real pull and draw over men....it requires men's consent on a certain level. Whereas the opposite is not true. And, if we follow what we understand of these myths....well, it doesn…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 12:56 PM
0

Women do get hated on for being feminine. We're routinely mocked for it in fact. It's so bad most of us have a tomboy phase at some point, try not to be like other girls, abhor the color pink for really no good reason, and spend an inordinate amount of our youth worried we're being girly or trying to be rational. All of our feminine interests are treated as frivolous or petty. All of our music is derided and people claim our favorite artists wouldn't be successful if they weren't so feminine/pre…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 12:43 PM
6

Someone will still have to raise those children, and in my experience...a lot of dads don't do the leg work. They want to guest star in their kid's show more than being main cast. I'm guessing a robot can also do that tho in your world. For me, I'd be thrilled not to have to put my body through pregnancy. Don't threaten me with a good time.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 12:12 PM
1

It's actually, sadly, often the opposite among young men especially...they only respect each other and will not enact so much violence particularly if they perceive the young man correcting them as "leaderly". They'll just take the correction. And then as they age, the threat of violence goes down while some of this dynamic persists because they've either come to respect women or they've somewhat cemented into their lack of respect for women. Now, do I agree with your assessment that if you're a…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 11:37 AM
1

Is it possible like me....those men just don't care much about a politician or a sports star especially who isn't their favorite? Even if they like the sport. If Charles Oliveres or Thug Rose aren't fighting I'm not that interested in the UFC fight. And due to their age, they're focused on forming an identity and for the moment that mostly includes figuring masculinity out because most young people spend a lot of time on what it means to be a man or woman. I can agree there's the bias you're men…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 10:32 AM
1

Young people are young people in part because they're so limited and yet full of potential for growth. If most of what you spend your time doing is working on how you look and you're 18, you haven't had much time on earth to become other things so at that age almost everyone isn't as multi faceted as they will become. It's the same reason young men tend to be like their one hobby. Young people are very one note. What I'm saying is.. they ain't reducing very much.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 10:26 AM
5

I'm not a feminist and can't say I had much interest in it (getting an English degree will make you hate it even more because it's like the only lense anyone will discuss a story through). I think you do somewhat correctly highlight a very real problem young women deal with mostly from young men. And there's a flipping to this, many young women spend so much time cultivating beauty they forget to really throw many points at anything else that makes it easy for men to talk to them when young beca…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 02:52 AM
7

I'm married, dude. I couldn't run our house without my husband and Lord knows he couldn't run it without me. And look, I'll support you too: what happened to 3?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 01:30 AM
3

The seeing beautiful woman is more about style than anything else. The amount of put together women that you find yourself admiring especially after 25+ is great. It's not sexual. Naked women are safer to look at. There's no primal fear response or imposition in a naked woman. I don't often hear the language of sexuality in women's commentary. Envy, sure. Admiration, yeah. But eroticism, not so much. Y'all need to sit down and accept that women aren't gay, you're just being unappealing. And you …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 01:28 AM
–

One of my brothers and my childhood bestie met their spouses through online dating. No one thinks it's entirely bad. In my opinion, it really depends on the apps you choose, the type of effort you put in, your self-awareness, your location, and how clear and open you are about your goals and communicating that. One of these things not being aligned is the likely cause of so many of the problems. Sure, there's problems with pictures not being the best medium to trigger female attraction which mea…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 01:23 AM
–

The answer, if one is even needed against feminism, is true men's rights activism. Seeking a social safety net for men that fall on hard times, mental health services for men possibly by men, addressing a fatherlessness crisis, rehabilitation efforts, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 10:02 PM
1

I'm not actually. I'm recognizing that they're being allowed to escape the discomfort of learning how to socialize in ways they likely couldn't have in eras past regardless of their circumstances or realities. I'm well aware escapism is typically motivated by the desire to escape uncomfortable reality. And it's starting at extremely young ages. They fail a few times (assuming they ever tried, which many don't because the siren call is introduced at younger and younger ages) and then they give up…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 12:00 PM
28

You shouldn't. I support you! Ra ra! Hold her accountable by not dating her.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 02:40 AM
14

Inside in this case was referencing my mental state actually. Gross man touching me in any way, yikes. Average woman touching me in any way, ehhh, I'll get over it before I die. I respect if you have a different answer to this random dilemma.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 02:38 AM
11

For sure. Like I'll close my eyes and think of England.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 02:37 AM
8

We're so far from the era of Katy Perry making every straight guy think it's ok to ask his gf for a threesome huh?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 02:20 AM
24

Actually, I remember when a question about fucking a gross man or the average woman went around a reddit of straight women, we all agreed the woman because we felt like we could walk that off and still be OK inside. Like gun to our head, gotta be the woman because it's not invasive. Eating shit, hardly. I don't want it and there's no allure, but it's hard to find it nearly so violating.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 02:19 AM
5

You miss the line where I made light of my cleaning skills, bud? It's reality. A personal chef, assistant, and caretaker make way more than most men make. Even if you could convince one person to do all this, their rate would easily be somewhere between 40-60 bucks an hour. At the rate I hung out with my boyfriend, we're talking on the low end like $500+ bucks a week for 15 hours. That would been his entire pay check plus per month.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 08:50 PM
2

For sure. Not disagreeing or pretending this is uniquely masculine. I just think women are less likely to think prostitution could be a solution for this problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 08:47 PM
12

Lmao. My man couldn't ever have afforded my cooking or caretaking. My cleaning maybe, I'm pretty mediocre on that front. Lord, men gotta stop thinking their wallet is that fat.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 06:40 PM
65

I think, you may be vastly underplaying their desire to be seen as attractive...and also underplaying their desire to be loved and *seen* in an intimate and loving capacity for their unique snowflake self. I also imagine you're greatly underestimating the difference in sex with someone who *actually* wants you and someone who is punching a clock (best case scenario), pretending for their very survival (bad case), and human trafficked (worst case). The idea these are virtually the same is well si…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 04:45 PM
7

Let's see, my grandparents on one side met at church in youth group. My grandparents on the other side, he owned the grocery store she shopped at and one of his employees knew her and offered to introduce them. My parents met in school because she was the know it all and he was the new kid so she was showing him around because her last name and his had the same letter. I met my husband at gym group work out and it took time to blossom with just us walking to our cars and chatting before class. O…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 02:44 PM
0

Seeing it every day in the lunch room, phones, Chromebooks, and video games aren't helping a lot of these boys. They're in them all the time instead of learning to socialize, make friends, etc. They'll all sit at the same table, and they're barely talking or if they it's always with a screen intermediary. You compare this to the other boys who are rowdy, talking, teasing, playing little hierarchy games, etc. It's not a surprise that one of these is coming out more socially calibrated and adjuste…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 01:50 PM
–

Wait, you think conservative women have small egos and introspection....have you seen Erika Kirk lately, hunny? Trust me, the whole God is on your side and you're the underdog thing doesn't make for more introspection or small ego stuff. I'm not even a progressive and I can see this isn't a politics caused it thing. The real root of everything is that women are allowed to be financially and socially independent now. This is causing growing pains for men and the late adopters are resisting at the…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 03:54 AM
1

I certainly can. I'm not convinced this is easy to judge for romantic relationships is the problem. It seems very often there's a lid for every pot, even the pots I would have judged without NBA potential so to speak.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 03:07 AM
–

Someone needs to read the Name of the Rose.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 06:33 PM
–

This assumes truth forms a coherent worldview....I don't think there's much evidence nor accuracy to that.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 06:30 PM
–

Science is one way to examine and understand the world. A very useful one at that. It's also unfortunately, not the best tool for every single job nor has it cornered the market on truth for a while variety of reasons I'm sure you're aware of like bias, the natural flawed nature of humanity, and the limits of say the ability to question all peoples while accounting for the above. So yes, we should (and every real scientist will tell you this), focus on the anecdotes of humans living and dead.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 02:58 PM
–

You know if you ask people with a messiah complex questions you also get a coherent worldview. The ability to express yourself coherently and truth are not the same thing sadly. Life is complicated and defies easy answers at every corner.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 02:25 PM
0

What compels you to believe I have no friends or have never known anyone in this industry? Equally, what makes you think my opinions are conservative...you know a lot of progressives also believe porn is an exploitative and predatory industry which should be abolished.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 03:04 AM
–

That's a weird policy. I guess every addict needs another addict to look down on, right?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 03:03 AM
0

I think when the industry is known for being so predatory and exploitative, it should take more than the insistence of an extremely young woman for you to believe she's there of her own well advised free will. But hey, maybe you also believe the Mexican cartel when they say they didn't do it.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 11:24 PM
–

I smoke the healthiest crack on the market. What a pair we'd make!
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 11:22 PM
–

I want someone with a healthy mind sexually. Find a woman that doesn't care.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 12:57 PM
4

I agree, provided he actually just leaves and does not get back together under the condition of getting what he wants...but most of the time that isn't what happens, is it? Most of the time he simply threatens her with leaving repeatedly as a way to control through fear. I also think there should be a caveat that you just leave. No shaming, no cruelty through words or actions, just a very kind, "I think we're different people and this isn't working out for either of us". Nothing belittling becau…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 03:39 AM
–

It's cuz y'all don't get boundaries. Boundaries are rules you keep and responses you give to them not being abided by. Like, you can have a no fat mothers rule and your response to fat mothers approaching you can be "no thanks, I'm not attracted to you". And that would be a boundary. And all of these boundaries can be informed by your masculine preferences and that would be fine. The only problem is when you call these things boundaries when what you really do is say, I don't like fat moms who f…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 01:57 AM
1

There's a lot of evidence therapy as it is practiced today is not geared towards men and emotional self work is just about as vague as you can get. I think most red pill is shoddy, exploitative, and unconcerned with actually improving men's lives. But, the one thing modern day red pill is accurate about, is that we as a society do not provide the same safety net for men that we do for women. And that's a problem. Now, do I think there's accuracy that most women do not need some 6 foot tall finan…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 04:07 PM
–

They do. You aren't talking to normal dudes. Normal dudes just wouldn't want her sharing what she used to do, which I think is pretty normal.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 01:51 PM
9

Using sex for behavior modification is gross, weird, and evil. No thank you. Not in my marriage. My pussy isn't a chore chart and I'm not raising my husband.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 01:48 PM
7

Civilization is allowed to end. Women aren't a gateway to the future or something you "get" like a stray cat. And we can spend money how we damn well please. Just say you don't like women being free agents and then self reflect on that.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 01:46 PM
–

I don't think it's worth arguing with these people. You're not dealing with reasonable people. You're dealing with people with an anxiety demon run rampant. The solution is not to convince them they're being crazy. Some part of them already knows that. You have to figure out what is fueling this crazy, which from what I can gather is a wounded ego of not feeling like an average man.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 01:43 PM
3

I'm gonna say this: nearly 100% of young people are a red flag factory and "bad" in multiple ways. The entire process of growing up and dating is a process of hopefully maturing out of these rough edges, selfishness, cruelty, poor judgement, and all other manner of vices that make one a poor choice for relationships. If women only selected the good men, no men would be selected in most cases.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 01:38 PM
5

You're making me do it. The burden of proof is on folks in your camp to prove they enjoy it and are not being exploited. Just saying, I really don't think they are and it seems statistically probable some of them are enjoying it isn't good enough. Casting aspersions on the character of the anti porn would be a fallacy. But here's the great thing. You can keep watching. And we can keep thinking that makes you kind of vile and refusing to date dudes who watch. And then you can find the women that …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 01:33 PM
0

I feel like I can do this for any of the pills, watch: Blue to Red: Things mostly work out for most people and trying to articulate why requires a strange mixture of luck, nature, and nurture. Good Red to Blue: Men have problems which are a result of sexist systems and deserve care and consideration too. And this does not require mistreating women. Bad Red to Blue: For the men things don't seem to be working out for, more is going to be required to make it work out including adaptions and modifi…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 03:33 AM
1

I wouldn't find it amazing and never would have. I know this may be hard to imagine, but safety is one of the pillars preventing this. The lack of sexual interest in random men, lack of promise of sexual pleasure, and overall mental damage this does to most folks are equally preventing this.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 03:23 AM
0

My brothers and sisters and I are all quite close and have been. Obviously we have our favorite siblings and there were some odd ages in there, but they didn't need partners to be emotionally seen. They also had male friendships. I mean this so well because there's some truth for some men here, but I think those men just have a problem opening up to anyone so they select for shallow friendships.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 03:17 AM
1

Sure, but the how much is the struggle. He probably ate a lot of heat up meals that take nothing, canned goods, ramen, etc. Paper plates are big with men. They ain't ironing or folding, etc. They don't go to the doctor or dentist after mommy stops being the one doing that. And they don't have kids yet. And once they do, they aren't doing the work so they can't imagine the work. I'm not saying this is right, but it makes sense why they think this way.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 05:10 PM
8

This is advice is actually based on what you're saying sort of. If you treat a woman like she's a celebrity, she's going to act like one, which is to say assume you want something from her and would do almost anything to get it within the bounds of being caught, don't really care about her as a person, kind of resent her for her success covertly, that you share nothing important in common, don't really deserve her, and also weirdly feel entitled to her attention because she wouldn't be so big if…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 05:08 PM
1

They don't because you have to imagine they never did it. Most of these men moved from having a mother who did it all for them (mothers, stop. Make your sons do this shit), to living in a bachelor pad where he ate out a lot and wore the same pair of pants 7 days in a row and generally behaving like a barely there bum who works all the time, to wanting to be the provider for a woman. They've never done the job so they cannot imagine it realistically. They're imagining her more or less doing what …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 03:18 PM
–

He'd choose not to is the problem. He's one of those that would just lose a limb and not go to the ER. And he'd choose to be lonely over seeing his friends. I should be clear, almost none of this is difficult for me due to a heavy administration background. It's simply time consuming and I'm glad I married someone that appreciates the contribution over pretending it's just so easy.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 03:14 PM
–

His job is busier than mine by not a small margin, he does all the lawn care, all the chicken care, fixes the house which is in constant need of repair due to being old, deals with the contractors, handles the majority of the laundry, the cleaning is often in his hands, etc. He doesn't claim incompetence or that any of this is unimportant. I'm very pleased with my husband, but that's in part because he gives me credit for handling the "mental load".
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 03:12 PM
1

Sort of, sort of not. Not just any adult can provide for an entire family. That's a lot of work and struggle with the goal the other partner and likely children don't even think about it. And it's not about preventing so much as protecting them from the woes of a work-life. I think the key problem here is that a work-life isn't that bad compared to the more 24/7 nature of SAHM. There's no off the clock for her. She lives where she works. And I think this is the element they don't get because kin…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 02:35 PM
–

Maybe all of this comes easy to you, but my husband will fully admit he doesn't want to do the things I look after for us: Plan all doctor's appointments and follow-ups around both our schedules so I can be there (note, he has never come to my doctor's appointments, but I have to go to his so he feels supported. I don't mind this, but I'd be pretty pissed if he acted like this was petty logistics or not valuable). And handling all reminders. Plan all our social events with all friends and family…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 02:26 PM
1

I think it' how most people live honestly. I think women just feel open to more roles than men do.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 01:31 PM
13

I'm not gonna lie, if I fucked to guarantee my orgasm without it being in doubt, it would almost only happen during ovulation week because everything is so much easier and more sensitive and doesn't really take almost any work. And unlike some of the other weeks where the position of stuff and hormones are different enough the promised land is really hard to get to even with proper help, I'd just know yeah, this is gonna happen. But I'm not sure my husband would appreciate that so amazingly he d…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 01:07 PM
3

I think most women today know this. I also think most men aren't seeking some power, they're seeking identity, a role, a reason to feel consistently valuable and know who they are. Men are generally more black and white concrete thinkers by my reckoning. If you tell them just be loved for who you are and keep her excited and joyful, that's a pretty nebulous fluid thing. It's a hard thing to know you're performing correctly. But make sure the bank account keeps going up and she doesn't have to wo…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 12:59 PM
3

Self depreciating humor works when it's clear you're secure in yourself and confident because that's how people know this isn't fishing for compliments.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 12:46 PM
29

I dunno, I kinda feel bad for anyone who wants something pretty average and can't achieve that even from their own self sabotage. I feel like anyone who wants true love and fails to find it we can all feel generic sympathy for because it's such a human thing. I mean provided they aren't being a jerk about it. Same for like having kids, having a pretty average job path they want. Like, it just sucks if they can't do that thing and my sympathy isn't really limited so why not have it. Like I don't …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 03:21 AM
-2

I'm so sorry that happened to you. I wouldn't be so sure. I have yet to meet an adult abuse victim that wasn't hearing wild shit after having their self esteem destroyed by their abuser. My husband's mother was being emotionally abused by him and he constantly threatened to take the kids away and have her declared insane like her mother. This was after he'd made her feel trapped financially and destroyed her self worth. I wouldn't be shocked if your daddy was in a similar place.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 03:13 AM
6

Let me tell you the story I was told for a counseling minor. She was 23, recently finished education and was in the early years of a solid job. She met him, they were both catholic, so they dated for about a year seriously, no sex, and he was a wonderful boyfriend, her family liked him - good job, active in community, no one would say a bad word. He was a nice guy, his family was lovely. They got engaged for another year, and he was a great fiancé. And then they got married. It started slow, fir…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 02:22 AM
3

Different districts different kids. I spend a lot of time playing defense for both the super smarties and the dumb dumbs because there's a lot of the haves and the have nots. And they both hate each other at the age I'm dealing in.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 02:06 AM
2

Dude, if he cares he'll give it up even if you don't ask. Just tell him what you think of it. I never had to ask my man, he just had to see my disgusted face, hear me talk about human trafficking, most actors starting as kids, how disrespectful it is, and how it makes men sick fucks and he stopped without me ever saying anything directly. If they don't care about your opinion, don't be with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 02:01 AM
2

I dunno how much you're in school, but the slow and dumb kids absolutely frustrate other kids and deal with social repercussions for their learning process. I never deal in dating apps. So, yeah. I dunno. Don't care, I suppose.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 01:42 AM
2

I don't think there's any new ones coming, tbh. I think it's pretty much levelled out at this point with them having all the same expectations as a woman. If anything, I see a swing hopefully back in some areas to make things a little more legally protective for men and hopefully with time better on safety net fronts.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 08:54 PM
3

Huh?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 08:07 PM
6

I'd say don't be with a neurotic partner in response. Loving someone is handling their crazy, not saying "fuck it, I refuse to please you, enjoy what I have to offer and shut up". It's just not how good relationships go.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 05:41 PM
3

Yeah, if they're in a relationship and they're willing to show and explain it. If you showed her how to, yes, I think so because the job is now about more than just task completion, but also loving your neurotic partner enough to have them do it in the way you like it done.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 05:33 PM
2

Yeah, I could see that being true.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 05:21 PM
2

I mean, I agree with you that it sounds like you're in a healthier place now. I don't think is women are wonderful, I think this is both those other women shared an expectation of you trying to please her by doing things her way. I wouldn't want to live in that all the time, but I don't think it's invalid either.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 05:20 PM
10

Yeah, that was my impression as well. I don't know how much I believe this is specific to women, I think it just emerges in different ways for the genders.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 04:36 PM
5

The back shoulders are an often underrated feature.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 04:35 PM
6

I know it. I love my man's arms, chest, smile, his whole face. He's a yum yum
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 04:33 PM
9

Oh boy, this again. When can we ban this nonsense?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 04:27 PM
30

Not that I'm sure, but isn't women are wonderful bias the belief women can do no wrong and are somehow naturally and inherently better and more trustworthy than men? And they're usually complaining about this being applied in ways that protect female abusers or criminals? Otherwise, I kind of agree some of the outrage at this is coming from a feeling of being locked out of wonderful women-land.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 04:24 PM
8

I did not recognize myself in your description and I'm hetero. How can an asexual fake attraction if they aren't being given something to fake. There has to be some script they're following and that script is based on a reality, right? The reality of female attraction which doesn't really sound like what you're saying.... SO if I describe Elvis Impersonation and it sounds like the real Elvis you're telling me this proves Elvis is a fake?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 04:19 PM
18

Or, go with me here: he isn't doing everything right. He may be trying really really hard, but that doesn't mean he's succeeding. He may be doing his best job, but that doesn't mean he's met the mark. He may be trying everything he knows to try, but the correct answer that would get him what he wants is outside of that region. And this is ok. As you point out, it doesn't have to mean he's evil or something, he just may be incompetent despite his best efforts. And I'm saying that as a school teac…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 04:15 PM
7

I uh. What? Your argument is that if a fake fakes well enough they prove the real deal is fake. So like, Elvis Impersonators prove Elvis isn't real in your world if they do it good enough?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 04:11 PM
2

I think the problem here isn't lust, it's that people don't realize the commitment, self-sacrifice, and irritation a long term relationship requires. They want to both be their most feral and independent and constantly altering self and also be in a relationship with another human who they will require to be stagnant and dependent. I genuinely advocate to people to take a good look in the mirror and ask themselves if they're willing to do the things real commitment and relationships require with…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 02:51 PM
1

I should play bingo with you guys. Hitchen's Razor, Bingo. You chose to respond to me. I don't need you to take me seriously. I'm not having some classical debate. I'm having a conversation. Feel free to dismiss me, I'm sure that would make daddy so proud and you can shower and think about owning people online. *** Your brilliance shines so bright, sir. I'm not sure how I manage to cower in your presence. Good to know 5th grade is when this started. It usually does. *** Remember the part where I…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 12:33 PM
6

He's also forgetting many many men present a front that takes a year or more to fall or make promises to change themselves or make big grand designs on their future and end up writing a check they had no intention of cashing.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 11:18 AM
1

I'm not playing this vulture where's the evidence game. There's a lot of breeds of mgtow and most aren't about family court. I respect the ones who are tho. Good for you. I'm a self declared genius too. The evidence is in how they talk and the entire concept of sour grapes. I didn't. Many times. Try your tricks on someone else. Good for you. Maybe go to an Incel forum and do some philosophical research. I have. Not a feminist. What was that about projected motivations? Guess you invented it, but…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 11:15 AM
0

He wasn't typical of what I dated. My experience of young men was that most of them had problems significant enough that if you're a smart young woman with your life together, you would not go there unless you're optimistic or curious due to youth. Oh, nothing so bad as all that. God. I feel for that girl. No, that's how you know my tolerance was low. It was things like smoking, dead end job, terrible family dynamics, no clear vision for life, hanging out with people it sounds like the girl you …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 10:50 AM
2

Not men, men who are entitled to sex and feel enraged when they don't get it can't win so long as that's the thing motivating their actions. Don't drag men into your messy room.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 10:43 AM
–

Yes, you might try it yourself. Just say you want to render women impoverished so they have to fuck unfuckable men. I'd at least respect you for having one virtue. It won't work by the by, the nonprofit safety net doesn't rely on government funding and is primarily aimed at women with children.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 02:32 AM
–

Yawn, another barely veiled threat against women's safety and rights. Sex isn't like shelter or education. Sex is a luxury good, like Nintendo. Shelter is a necessity at least if your winters are like mine and practically all cultures develop shelter alongside the other things you mention. Education similarly is a requirement to pass on knowledge. You really cannot do without it, that's why all cultures develop some form of it. Interestingly, most cultures also develop ways of handling unfuckabl…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 02:18 AM
1

Do you think I'm describing every section of the red pill ever? I'm not. But a lot of mgtow is sour grapes. I acknowledged the people facing tragedy. You just wanted a lame gotcha.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 01:58 AM
1

I don't think so. He, like many men of this age, was rough around the edges with a lot of self destructive tendencies he has since outgrown in large part due to martial arts and me pointing out his behavior was absolutely uncouth and retarded. I think people assume when you meet the one they're perfectly perfect. This wasn't the reality for us. We grew together until we could be together.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 10:13 PM
1

Yes, that seems to be true. I think it may always have been true.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 04:01 PM
1

I'm confused by your question. Maybe you can say it another way? If you're asking me do I think more men than women are looking for a female partner...yeah. Do I think this has something to do with the gays....no? I would agree many women are off the market. And I would agree there are more men than women from my understanding which makes this worse.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 03:49 PM
2

Correct.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 03:40 PM
3

I have a pretty complicated view of a lot of this, honestly. I disagree that most women aren't straight. Most women are straight and not fluid in that. I think many bisexual women are basically straight, but are either behaving for attention or people pleasing as if they like women, but who they actually sleep with and marry without any pressure from a many or society tells the true story. I think a significant portion of lesbians are women that have been extremely traumatized typically by men a…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 03:31 PM
–

I think mostly no because femininity is more fluid.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 02:50 PM
8

I don't think anyone is claiming they're crazy because they can't get laid. If anything, they're claiming they can't get laid because they're crazy. No, they're saying those men are crazy especially because they think pussy is a need. After that, it's all about reading the person, right? Plenty of nice fine dudes are winging about being unable to find love without it being some entitlement thing or crazy. But, if I add them using terms like foid, roastie, talking about 80/20, how women should lo…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 01:36 PM
2

...which wouldn't explain why this is also true of single men. I also wouldn't know that. I'm constantly trying to get my husband to hang out with his buddies or arranging for him to get together with them without me there. Don't blame women because men tend to heavily focus on that one relationship despite ladies trying to get them to develop a true support system.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 11:45 AM
1

Must be a new generation of pick up on the rise. All the ones I know did not do that.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 10:53 AM
1

If perspective shift is a fix for women, surely it would be for men.... I also think you can say women don't have it easier in total while saying they fair better mentally generally. They also reach out and do more to address their problems generally mentally.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 10:52 AM
1

I never said most men are physical abusers. You're wilding or misunderstanding. I don't have an intense revulsion to men I encounter. You're playing.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 10:49 AM
1

I mean, before he got blown up, Andrew Tate was not direct at all. It was not a known thing. And the same is true for red pill pick up artists. They don't say what they're about. No one says I'm negging you to make you work for my affection while making you feel insecure. Can you say there's red flags, sure. But that assumes the women involved know they're red...most don't especially when young. And they aren't the man you're attracted to in most cases, they're a shallow play of him because you …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 02:20 AM
8

Red pill can mean anything from pick up artistry which is manipulative almost by definition to men's rights movements surrounding mental health, parental rights, and social ills plaguing men all the way to someone like Andrew Tate who uh, well let's just say he's on record explaining how to turn women into sex workers and use sexual abuse to control them...which would be manipulative in case that needs saying. Of these, the one I support is the one that kind of has fallen away (the rights activi…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 01:50 AM
1

If you say generation beta I will throw my drink at you.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 01:46 AM
1

I didn't even know that was a generation.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 01:26 AM
3

I don't recall it. Last I checked women try suicide more and men complete it more which kind of seems like nobody won that round in terms of being mentally healthy. I'm fairly sure for various hormonal reasons women are more prone to bipolar and anxiety disorders while for social and biological men are more prone to depression and schizophrenia. Again, kind of seems like no one gets that round. I think ptsd may be higher in men just from the military factor so maybe we give them that. But women …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 01:25 AM
2

The sun never sets on the Oprah Empire.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 11:26 PM
3

A lot more than most people would suspect.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 11:26 PM
1

I think you're using this differently than I am. At base, I think of emotional vulnerability as being an open book emotionally. It's all there on the page to read. Emotional control would be what you're describing for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 11:09 PM
1

They're also open. I'm talking about the person who is so numb to shame and seemingly invulnerable to the point they're telling you deep dark shit about their marriage ending when you've known them for all of an hour.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 10:37 PM
-1

There's a gender war on. The weapons of women: Oprah The weapons of men: actual fucking weapons because men are pretty good at war. Who won? Who is next?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 10:29 PM
1

I would agree in many cases they are connected, but there are those people who just bleed everywhere all the time and overshare.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 10:26 PM
2

I feel like they're both fairly attractive in largely equal measure. I think maybe the only distinction I'd make is that emotional resilience tends to be more attractive short term because it's an easy admiration for those who overcome and I think emotional vulnerability is more attractive and sustaining to the long-term. If I have to choose, I would say emotional vulnerability because a lot of resilient people don't find relationships due to being too hardened, but even the most emotionally ope…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 10:20 PM
–

Bad stats, women are primary caregivers. If men weren't abandoning their children, those stats seem likely to be relatively similar. *** You would be incorrect. According to the Ninjas it's men. Note, when we start to look at types of crime rather than all crime, men emerge as committing the overwhelming majority of violent crimes particularly homicide. *** I dunno, I'd have to talk to the catholic church priests to get some insight. you're cherry picking stats and that means I'm basically done …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 10:02 PM
–

Uuuu I see how you play. All crimes aren't equal. Ask me who commits 90% of homicides worldwide. Who do you think is 80% of violent crimes. I guess if we reclass women who smoke while pregnant maybe those would be rookie numbers by men. Wear your crown, kings. You worked for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 09:05 PM
1

He's alive. Husband is dead. Gotta focus on what can be had, not what is gone
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 06:56 PM
24

You know you can just tell your bros you want a hug, right? Women don't have to be gay for you to go to a baseball game and talk about life with another man.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 06:54 PM
3

Sure. And I think it's kind of a waste of time similar to criticizing women's bodies. Like, be healthy is really your best approach and it's hard to do. I'm still working on how to eat healthy and I'm by all regards skinny. And if someone is fat, like, they know that's not a good state to be in unless they're absolutely delusional. I think they are working hard, just not smart. And while hard work is nice, you know it's still not the right answer. I teach a lot of kids working hard, doesn't mean…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 04:49 PM
4

I have, at no point, commented on men's bodies. Appearance is about much more than the body. I think most men are failing on the shit they can control than the shit they cannot. I wouldn't for example, recommend dressing to the 9s for a date.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 04:41 PM
4

Misandry would be if I believed any of these things were somehow inherent to them. I don't believe not focusing on appearance is inherent to masculinity...it is a choice that is made each and every day. Sometimes I make that choice myself. The same would be said for everything else on this list, good sir. I don't hate men. I say these things because I actually care about their happiness and as far as I can tell, these are the things leading them to the greatest unhappiness and often are feeding …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 04:30 PM
6

In most relationships, honestly. People are going to annoy you or do things you don't like or wish they wouldn't in nearly 100% of relationships. Expressing that all the time will ruin your social life. Picking your battles is important. *** Yes, he will also generally be much less put together. No, I don't include dating apps in any of my thinking. I mean literally grab your average dude and your average lady. Yes, she'll be a bit thicker, she'll also be a finely manicured well dressed specimen…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 02:51 PM
–

Reading comprehension would suggest otherwise. But I appreciate you sharing your perspective.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 02:28 PM
5

Them handling things differently and them having to are different things. I don't think they have to. And I do think men would benefit from being more like women which is not the same as saying just be a woman. Yes, I've heard that research. The question is why. And I can think of reasons why, but none of them strike me as biological realities men are born into. I think they have a lot more to do with socialization and while obviously who cares how you talk, right shoulder or face make it happen…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 02:26 PM
7

I'm happily married. And I'm surrounded by many good men now that I'm in my 30s. But my teens and 20s, I can't say most men were passing any of the thresholds you mentioned with the exception of employment, which isn't what I'd call a high bar to clear. And most of the men I know now are not what I'd call emotionally and socially all there. I mean they're getting by, but I know their wives and girlfriends...I know they ain't seeing the full picture because they're being disagreeable and dense. S…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 02:13 PM
10

Because I am aware the world is not all about me and I would like connections with those people. And I am aware in order to have them I need to control my egotistical urge to believe everything about me is the right way to be and my comfort is the only thing which is important. And that some sacrifice is necessary to get along. *** Notice I said counterpart. So does a fat man look like he cares as much as a fat woman about her appearance? I doubt you think so. Compare likes. I don't think a fit …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 02:06 PM
8

You seem, I'm guessing to be happy and in a stable and happy marriage, so clearly it's working for you whatever you're doing, right? Your only remaining concern would likely be what lessons you are modeling for your children and that's a harder question to have a right answer for, right? Maybe what you're modeling is great. Maybe it will lead to real struggles for your children down the road too numerous to list and same for your wife, right. What I think we can say with certainty is that explos…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 01:58 PM
19

Stop it. This almost sounds like a mission statement to actually improve men's lives in tangible and intangible ways. What you're forgetting is that what men REALLY need is um *checks notes* delusion. Yes, delusion. Not social networks with meaningful support and love. They need uh, I dunno, I stopped reading OP after that because Bill Burr said what he did a decade ago and a lot more funny.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 01:46 PM
5

Bless our heart.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 01:44 PM
7

I didn't say they don't. Read my post and find the words "GREATER EFFORT" - Me about 40m ago.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 01:43 PM
9

I was listing statistical and observed realities. Them being known for it kind of depends who you ask, but I'd suspect if you asked most men even here: Do you think most women put more effort into their appearance than their male counterpart - YES Do you think most women put more thought into their connections with friends, families, and romantic partners - YES Do you think women are quicker to share their emotions - YES Do you think women are more likely to at least pretend to get along - YES
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 01:38 PM
6

Nice try, Coyote. Not falling for it this time.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 01:35 PM
7

Rats. I'm just hoping to run the data centers out of town.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 01:34 PM
44

Shoot, I was hoping this would be about men putting greater effort into their appearance, their relationships, their emotional vulnerability, and their agreeability. I am a foolish gal. The coyote has tricked me again.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 01:02 PM
–

I mean, the mind obviously, but the stranger's body depending on how ugly would throw a wrench in the physical relationship. My disgust and fear response may be a hard thing to conquer.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 12:43 PM
1

Everything is messy and also binary, right? The answer is either yes or no. If you don't think the answer is yes, don't proceed. Ambiguity and uncertainty is a no. It's just a no that lends itself to wishful thinking. It's not misreading, it's choosing an interpretation that offers foolish hope over dealing with the most likely reality. It's extremely rare feelings are being hidden and shyness still shows attraction, that would be an example of knowing your audience. Again, these are the scenari…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 12:40 PM
7

I've been wearing tights and leggings since I was about 8. They're extremely comfortable. I'm sorry if you can't imagine not everything is about sex, but we aren't lying about enjoying how comfortable they are. The reason they aren't generally made for men is that y'all have exterior genitals you can't reallt cover with that kind of pants and I presume would not be comfy. And let's be honest. You claimed boldly that if women dress a way they shouldn't be surprised or angry their man cheats. And …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 02:27 AM
3

Probably A. Although it's sure gonna be weird people know we're married, but don't think I've sealed that deal 🤣
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 01:52 AM
1

I'm married to a good man who received the same message about not being a sex pest as the rest of you and somehow managed, despite that to have relationships and date. Most of my lady friends are also married to good men that somehow managed to thread the needle of not making women uncomfortable and also talking to them. I currently teach middle school and most of the kids are paired up and the ones who aren't are who you'd expect, kids obsessed with video games, very shy and anxious types, or i…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 01:50 AM
1

I think it applies to friends too somewhat unfortunately. Most women dread their dude friend developing feelings. Most dudes seem to be neutral or positive.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 11:54 PM
2

No, I'm clarifying what I've said. If you're talking to girls you know, you should have a pretty solid idea where they stand on you. Dates aren't getting to know people in this particular way. You should know they'd welcome a date with you, which would mean you already know them somewhat.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 11:52 PM
4

Do you see your math. Check your work, sir: No amount of women saying supposedly misandristic things would ever add up to even the scales of male violence. It just can't. Sticks and stones.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 11:51 PM
1

B obviously. A (other than that I apparently agreed to this arrangement) sounds like a nightmare.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 08:46 PM
2

I think there's a big difference here too between hearing what is essentially the private or diaristic confessions of women about their friends asking them out and looking down on men who ask friends out. The new problem is that men are able to ask for advice about this situation online and well...yeah, online you're going to get that diarist element and learn that truly most women hate it. The reason it's not the opposite is most men don't hate it.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 08:43 PM
–

I'm happily married to Chad, thank you very much. I'm sorry the reality that most men aren't appetizing options has been conflated with the idea women aren't actually attracted to men. Perhaps if men would be safer and more attractive....
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 08:40 PM
5

We must have gone to different colleges, because in mine, the common way was sharing classes, having some giggles, and then eventually asking her out after it was pretty clear she was into you. (Obviously, unless drunk and at a house party). It pretty much is if you don't have any reason you know her. And it has never been common, not by any stretch of the imagination. You used to require an introduction to even speak to a lady you didn't know or it was considered rude. That was the most common …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 07:08 PM
5

That may be one of the top most brutal jobs ever. There's a reason none of us recommend it and it's not some covert operation to turn all men lonely. I wouldn't recommend it to anyone I cared about.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 07:02 PM
10

How does that make sense to you? Women say some mean things online is somehow equivalent to the actual damaging and physically awful things men do? You know men say mean stuff online too, right?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 05:09 PM
1

Did it really? When? When is the age in which it was common to bother women you don't know for a date because while I can imagine perhaps it was the 80s, this has not historically been common. Warm approach (aka a done deal) was the most common consent style on the market in almost every decade known to humans. I think this is a made up gripe, just being honest. Nothing changed, women just really shut down on even the slight minority of bullshit there's always been. Cold approach was never commo…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 04:25 PM
–

If you assume the outcome is what matters (either LTR or hook-up) and you're unable to reach the outcome you want, you are struggling in dating. The fact one person has to walk through an abandoned haunted house and the other has to fight zombies in that haunted house is kind of irrelevant. If anything, it's pretty easy to argue fighting zombies is the harder option because you're having your time wasted and held up in what is essentially a time challenge situation. Men don't have to fight zombi…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 04:14 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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