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Quodpot Archive

View 0 posts and 155 comments by Quodpot on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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39

Lmao, I lived abroad for a while and was a bit of a hippie too (I showered daily and had a job tho), and I basically didn't date at all for a whole year because most of the guys I met were like this One of them freeloaded off my friend for like 4 months, living in her apt, letting her take him out all the time, etc etc. And in the end he stole like $700 from her (which was like a whole month of living expenses where we were) and fucked off back to the UK. Also, the entire time he was picking on …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 08:44 PM
76

She also told him where she lives over the argument he fabricated so she would show him on the map. This story literally makes my skin crawl
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 09:25 PM
3

?????? I thought that was a thing that TV/movies made up. What a sad way to live, that really sucks for your grandma and other women who feel like they need to do this
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 06:08 PM
45

Idk, I hooked up with a salsa teacher one time after a night of dancing and like ... It definitely seemed like those skills translated. YMMV obviously
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 07:07 PM
8

I agree with you, but like ... It's NPR. This sort of bias is par for course for them. I used to listen a lot of their podcasts, but stopped because I found myself just getting increasingly annoyed with their milquetoast liberalism. They remind me of men who use the label "feminist" to cover for their shitty actions and get women to put their guard down around them. My ex was one of those guys and would put on NPR 24/7 - I hardly ever listened to music for the 3 years we were together. No joke, …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/21 01:14 AM
8

I'm Asian-American as well and tbh, I've been fetishized by men of every race. I remember my Colombian neighbor (in his 50s 🤮) telling me he "liked exotic women" and offering to paint me nude (he was a professional artist but still. I was the same age as his daughter!) eweweweweww. I don't really factor race/ethnicity into my vetting process anymore. I used to think that MoC would treat me better, but apparently fetishizing Asian women is basically universal Not directly related to my above poin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 09:31 PM
21

Listen to Petals for Armor by Hayley Williams. It's a beautiful and deeply reflectful, kinda experimental (but still accessible) album from the lead singer of Paramore. I've always kind of looked up to Hayley like an older sister, and seeing her glow up post-Chad Gilbert while recovering from my own pickme days, it just came out at the perfect point in my life, during quarantine. Have cried so much over this album. Give it a shot, anyone looking for some healing during these times (and enjoys th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/21 01:49 AM
5

Ughhhhh I once "dated" (lmao) a Turkish scrote who was basically 4 and 5 on this list combined, PLUS he wanted to be poly lolol. He was basically homeless despite his college degree, and I let him mooch off of me for like 3 months while he destroyed my apartment and my life, before he fucked off back home where his mom and grandmother dote on him and do everything for him. He was 22 and balding and literally NEVER showered, it was horrible Also I once had a layover in Istanbul, where I had a ter…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 07:06 AM
14

Can anyone explain why they do this? I got a couple similar messages in quarantine from dudes I used to hook up with during my pickme days. One of them was in a different country. I just don't get it
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/21 09:53 PM
1

I'm not planning to get married or have kids 🤷‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 05:51 PM
5

Wtf is this brainwashed bullshit. Fuck "submitting" to anyone, this is a terrible take
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/21 07:49 AM
6

Yeah the slurs are fking disgusting. But I bought a GME stock because fuck hedge funds, and I'm perfectly fine with losing the money. I don't really expect anything to come of it anyway. What I really want to know is how to get into investing for real. I want to help my mom invest in index funds and build for retirement for both of us
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/21 07:25 AM
2

If I want to get into investing for real, are there good resources out there to teach myself? Tbh I actually did buy one stock of GME due to this whole fiasco, but I don't expect it to make me rich or anything. I ended up investing slightly more into a couple other companies that seem more stable and not overinflated
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/21 07:21 AM
6

Omg I'm sorry but I'm sooo curious! Can you message me too?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/20 09:10 AM
11

I had a huge argument the other day with 3 scrotes and a disgusting pickme that piled on me for defending other women who date outside our race (I am Asian, for reference). Calling me "mEnTaLlY cOlOnIzEd" while the shit they were saying is the same dehumanizing shit that other races say about Asian women. Yet somehow it's okay coming from them? They couldn't see how they were contributing to the oppression of not only the women in the community, but themselves too. The projection was fucking cra…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 09:59 PM
8

Yeah, there's an extremely toxic subreddit for hapas that, when I heard about it, thought would be a good place to find support and talk about issues we have to deal with, but NOPE. All incels. It was disappointing and kinda scary ngl
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 09:38 PM
2

WHAT. As someone who cares about my skin and changes my pillowcase at least once or twice a week, I can't imagine sleeping on this wtf. I don't want to imagine what the rest of the house is like 😭😭😭
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/20 07:37 PM
5

Beautifully put. I've been into tarot as a form of self discovery lately and that cup metaphor reminds me of the Ace of Cups card. It depicts a full goblet with water flowing into and out of it, which to me symbolizes abundance and self care /self focus. In its reverse position (if you pull it upside down) it's focused outward, like working on relationships with others, but in the upright position it's focused inward, on self work
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 07:19 PM
4

Watch Westworld, it's pretty much this exact plot
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/20 05:55 PM
2

I do this. If I need to burp or fart when he's around, I just do it (politely), but I don't try to hide it or anything. Like, if you're trying to find a life partner, they need to be okay with you being a regular human being. I refuse to be uncomfortable in my own home
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 08:25 PM
9

Eww. Mulan was my hero growing up and it kinda bums me out that this is what they did with her. Then again, none of the live-action remakes are even halfway decent (I saw the Aladdin one and it sucked) I read an article the other day about how the original animated version had a lot of things that made it a movie specifically geared at Asian-Americans, since certain things like cutting her hair and Mushu the dragon as comic relief, resonated more with a Western audience (and apparently the origi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 07:39 PM
2

I'm really interested in reading about this, if you ever feel like sharing
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 10:29 PM
11

When I went to visit my ex in Spain, I immediately could tell he'd been cheating on me with this Italian girl from the moment I saw her, lol. Her whole expression immediately changed as soon as I walked in the room, and she was rude to me for the whole week I was there, before I decided I would be better off solo traveling and bought myself a bus ticket to another city. He claimed he didn't cheat, at least not physically, but the emotional cheating was enough as far as I was concerned
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 04:59 PM
10

I fully believe and trust in my intuition, because I've regretted it every time I've ignored my gut instinct. I don't care if people think it's not a real thing
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 04:42 PM
6

I once went out with a guy who had like 5000 hours (not exaggerating) on DOTA (not sure how long the time span was, probably around 5 years). I know because he showed me his account. AND he told me he's not even good at it - straight up said this to me, kind of laughing/joking about himself. 1000 hours on a game per year and he still sucks at it. What a fucking waste of time and energy. I was so turned off by that (plus his room was disgusting)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 07:06 PM
5

Everytime I move, I give away most of my stuff to my friends, or I donate it. Most of it is very gently used or often brand new (I'm into skincare and sometimes I just change my mind about things but am too lazy to return them)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/20 05:18 PM
15

It sucks that there is no respect for teachers in America. When I taught abroad I loved it, and even the problem kids I could handle. Parents worked with me and listened to my suggestions and even took me and my partner at the time out for dinner (with the whole class and all the parents there too, it was really sweet!)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 05:10 PM
15

.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/20 05:30 AM
6

Some books that have helped me: Why Does He Do That, The Art of Loving, The Four Agreements, The Bullet Journal Method, Thinking Fast and Slow, Wild (by Cheryl Strayed), Will I Ever Be Good Enough: Healing the Daughts of Narcissistic Mothers (may or may not apply to you) Also pretty much any book that makes me think and empathize with other people/characters. It gets me to notice where I disagree or agree with their perspective, which helps me tease out my own responses to things. I ask myself w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 07:59 PM
3

Yes, I actually respect that he's kept his gray hair. And it seems like he treats her right!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 07:23 PM
3

Following
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 07:18 PM
3

Read more
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 07:10 PM
3

What mythology is that from? Mermaids are a Greek myth right?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 03:27 PM
3

Swishing your mouth with water mixed with a bit of baking soda also helps neutralize the acid from throwing up
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 02:55 PM
2

Well I'm interested in what you find, if you care to share! I did always wonder why men are so obsessed with that book
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 10:22 PM
61

YES. Everyone should wear sunscreen, including men, including people with darker skin tones (who are less likely to get skin cancer overall, but if they do, it is usually caught at very advanced stages) I hung out a few months ago with this guy I knew from college, and aside from the libertarian, anti-vax views he had developed in the past 2 years I hadn't seen him, he also spends a ton of time in the sun without any sunscreen and it SHOWS. He's 24 and has a ton of wrinkles and skin damage. Plus…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 08:51 PM
9

I actually like David Foster Wallace - his essay "Consider the Lobster" is a great philosophical read. Infinite Jest is just one of those books people have lying around to try and prove how smart they are
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 07:10 PM
3

Oh, how come with Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance? My arrogant faux-intellectual ex loved that book, that one and Cutting for Stone. I never read either one though, they seemed like books that were meant for men to relate to
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 07:04 PM
2

I lived with a German esl teacher for a little while and she told me that every class she teaches with older students, she gets constantly asked about Hitler. She was really sweet, I felt bad she had to deal with that
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 07:02 PM
3

I got halfway through Haunted and put it down because each chapter was supposed to be written by a different character, yet it all sounded obviously written by the same person. The characters were unlikable, and the book was just trying way too hard to be eDgY with the gore and sex. I also hated that it was faux-deep, like something written by a teenager
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 06:38 PM
2

Aww, so wholesome!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 05:02 AM
19

I still do OLD sporadically out of boredom, but one of my new rules is that if a guy isn't holding up his half of the convo, I will just unmatch. Or if I ask questions, try to engage, etc. and then they only talk about themselves Like what's the point of putting in effort for people like this? I'm not pressed at all about finding someone, so putting in more effort just isn't worth it
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/20 05:32 PM
3

Reminds me of a guy who tried hitting on me in a class in college. He asked me what I was doing for the holidays, then immediately followed it up with "Have you considered taking out your nose ring? You'd be so much prettier without it" I was like 🙄 But I already didn't like him before he even approached me, because of the way he was rude/condescending to our really wise and kind of awesome econ professor. There was one other woman in that class, and her and I would just make eye contact every t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/20 05:19 AM
2

Thanks for the book suggestion! I just started it and it's really interesting already
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 02:32 AM
2

It's definitely more of a subconscious thing in the vast majority of people. Never said it was an active hatred - although active hatred can also obviously be found in a lot of cases, as a basic Google search would show you I'm not going to read all that, but I will say that I disagree that these kind of arguments are "barking up the wrong tree" and honestly it's pretty narrow-minded of you to think that way, especially considering that most of the history of women is forgotten. I just started a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 02:26 AM
6

I don't see these ideas as mutually exclusive. Humans are complicated
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/20 12:54 AM
4

I never understood why people say "hate sex" is a thing. If I hate someone, why would I want to have sex with them? Idgi. Even if someone is physically attractive, if they have a shitty personality it's a complete turn off to me
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/20 06:46 AM
4

Yes, I've given up hope on finding a man while living in New England. Dating will have to wait til I can move to LA
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 01:39 AM
9

How do you duck out of a date when a guy has clearly lied about his height or appearance? Sometimes they show up and look nothing like their photos so it's like an immediate 'no'. I've used the bathroom excuse before, but even that means I have to stick around and waste my time for a bit
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 01:38 AM
9

Yeah, I usually swipe left on dudes who look like they spend too much time at the gym and/or have shirtless pics
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 09:47 PM
31

Okay, the dog bouquet is soo cute and thoughtful! I've met literally ONE guy irl who actually goes out of his way to do stuff like this for his girlfriend. You could tell how much he really loved her not just from the presents, but the way he talked about her and looked out for her. Like, he was trying to set me and her up for a friend date because he liked me and thought we would get along, lol Knowing him helps me hold out hope I still might meet a decent man one day
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 09:27 PM
3

Yes leaving is difficult, but staying away is harder by far. I am going through a similar feeling right now, trying to stay away from someone who hurt me before Take care of yourself OP. Even on days you feel really sad, just remember things will get easier. And tbh, breaking up does get easier the more times you do it. Take it from me, a wizened 20 something
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 07:20 AM
3

I haven't really come across guys like this on Hinge in the States. I base it in one of two bigger cities near me though, not my actual local area. Fuck that, lmao
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 07:06 AM
4

I'm an extrovert, but I'm pretty used to it actually. Solo traveling made me a lot braver and more perceptive, I think. I'm used to eating alone, I bring my journal or kindle and try to stay off my phone too lol. Or I'll have big headphones and sit against a wall, which is maybe a bit paranoid, but they're basically noise canceling and I don't want to be followed by someone I didn't notice because of them. While I was solo traveling, I met a lot of really cool women just from paying attention to…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 07:03 AM
9

Idk, one of my exes is British, and he was cheap as hell. I paid for every dinner, coffee and vacation and he had the audacity to ask me for more too I actually began to date American guys again while abroad because I got sick of paying for everything with the mostly European (specifically English) or Australian dudes I was dating. Aside from other Americans, only the South Africans also picked up the bill regularly This was just my experience as an ESL teacher though. My impression is that most…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 02:42 AM
6

Yes, I'm tired of doing this. I'm honestly just fed up
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 02:29 AM
15

WHOA. This is some amazing insight right here, goddamn. I just started reading The Four Agreements and this is basically what it said in the first chapter, as well. Very helpful for an emotional situation I'm currently dealing with
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 02:26 AM
1

"I like the Office"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 03:19 AM
3

Whaat?? Terrible advice. Honestly, my girlfriends, my mom, and Maya Angelou have given me way better and more useful advice about relationships than any therapist ever has
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/20 08:47 PM
5

I want to become a life coach! I met a lady who does it full time while I was abroad, and she really asked me thoughtful questions and gave me a lot of insightful things to tease apart in my life. She didn't condescend to me, unlike therapists I have had in the past. I just get a bit put off by life coaching sometimes because so much of it seems like a gimmick, but she was so genuine and nice. I want to do that for other women too, it's very empowering
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/20 08:41 PM
52

Omg ewww. Can you imagine being one of those kids and finding out you were born just because your dad has a pregnancy fetish? 🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 05:39 PM
3

YEP. Last boyfriend was basically a virgin when we met - I thought we could work on it, but he just stayed completely lazy and never put any effort in. He was awkward as hell and didn't even seem to care to learn or communicate at all. Told me his last girlfriend could come from PIV only, so he never had to do anything to get her off. LMAO. Waste of my time
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 12:27 AM
1

What gives that impression? Genuinely curious. I don't know much about Grimes or Elon (aside from the obvious things), but I like some of her music and was a bit surprised when I heard they were having a kid
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 12:17 AM
2

Ooh, thanks for the tip! I didn't know that and came across a dude like this the other day
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 10:41 PM
8

Thank you for this, lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 10:29 PM
8

Disney Dad. Those kids may think he's fun now, but they will resent him when they grow up
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 10:21 PM
6

The AUDACITY
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 02:29 AM
14

Omg thank you for clearing up this mystery - I never understood why some guys were like that. I can't believe it took me this long to realize! Lmao
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 07:16 PM
1

I bet she's a lot older than him too
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 07:15 PM
5

omg you dodged a bullet. Glad you trusted your gut on this one! Be really careful now though, he might start stalking you. For future reference, you can make a Google Voice account which will give you a throwaway number
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/20 04:00 AM
48

One of my friends of 6 years did this to me. Literally just used me as a hookup. I guess it's my fault for being enough of a fool to believe that he would treat me better just because we were friends
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/20 02:31 AM
9

Same. The only way a partner can actually finish me off is if I'm already like 90% of the way there because of the headspace I'm in. Has never happened with anyone I wasn't really into on an emotional level (though some of the time, I have been able to get there with hookups who I've been really attracted to and had really deep and meaningful conversation with)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 05:09 AM
7

I think she ultimately had to move to the UK to get away from all of it
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/20 09:30 PM
36

Military and police are an automatic NO for me. I went on a couple dates with an Army grunt before (decided to give him a 2nd chance because I felt bad, when my gut instinct told me no after the first one. Never again 🤦‍♀️). He was probably one of the dumbest and trashiest people I've ever met. It turned out he could barely read, and thought the earth was 3000 years old (did not bring that up on the first date, obviously). He referred to women as "bitches" and after I ghosted him, I saw him post…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/07/20 06:53 PM
2

Link? What do you mean?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/20 04:33 AM
2

Well, just to clarify: saying something like 'female friends' is okay since the word is being used properly as an adjective, vs. using it like a noun, which is how incels say it. I had a woman get upset at me for describing my girlfriends one time as 'female friends'
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/20 11:13 PM
72

JuSt sOmEtHiNg tO tHiNk AbOuT
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/06/20 06:45 AM
1

No. The husband is oblivious that this other dude is trying to lord it over him in this literal dick measuring contest. I've met and dated men like this before. They are literally oblivious, or they are intimidated by the guy's false show of confidence and either way, say nothing. Not the kind of man anyone needs, whatever the reason. This is actually a huge breach of trust by him. Imagining this situation in reverse, I would get confrontational if a woman tried to pull this sort of disrespectfu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/20 08:03 AM
3

I finally finished from a ons for the first time last month and I'm not joking, it was the first time I ever finished from a hookup. We had sex twice and my friend literally made me cum more times than 2/3rds of my exes and every past hookup combined. I was kind of shocked tbh. I thought there was something wrong with me/my body for literal YEARS before this experience
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/20 08:00 AM
2

The best sex I've ever had has been with guys who barely ever talk about it (except in the context of us discussing expectations, likes/dislikes, etc.) Someone who treats sex like a game dehumanize their partners, and if someone is less than human in a person's mind, the automatic response is to not care about them or their experience. It's complete selfishness and leads to shitty sex, among other issues
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/20 07:40 AM
2

One of my friends said his mother told him this same thing about cooking, hahaha. People will tell you they love the food no matter what, but how many of them come back for seconds?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/20 07:34 AM
7

Not just embarrassing her, but himself as well since he was just STANDING there, letting this dude say whatever disrespectful thing he wanted to his wife in front of everyone. Why didn't he say something when the guy even asked the question in the first place? In what universe is it okay to ask someone something like that, even if their spouse isn't standing RIGHT there? What kind of friends are these? My male friends would never speak this disrespectfully about me or any other woman, because if…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/20 07:30 AM
3

He tried to pull a power move and it just completely backfired, lmfao 😂 Saying this shit not only in front of ALL their friends, but her husband as well. What a fucking loser, thought he could pressure her into going along with it. Glad she knocked him down a couple pegs, sounds like he sorely needed it He's still pretty young at least - maybe he'll be more humble after this humiliating experience. Fucked up that the husband didn't even recognize this dude trying to embarrass him and his wife an…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/20 07:29 AM
8

Lmaoooo, saying "nice dress" is a mistake vs. saying "seeing the way that dress squeezes your breasts together makes me want to throw you over this table"? I want to laugh and cry at the same time. I feel sorry for any woman who has to cross paths with this selfish piece of shit. What a terrifying thing to say to someone you've literally just met. And he's telling OTHER people to do this shit to women as well. Just WTF all around
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/20 07:17 AM
3

I do this too! I started when one of my old roommates said (about a non-dating topic) to picture someone I admire/think is brave and strong in the situation I'm facing. Then imagine what I think they would do and do that thing
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/20 07:10 AM
4

I'm willing to bet there are tons of thirsty men who lurk that sub because they think it'll be easier to pick up women who are in dead bedroom situations
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/20 07:07 AM
3

She's hoping that he'll be excited one of these times by this offer, because we're all so societally brainwashed to believe that men are complete animals and want sex 24/7. She wants to be wanted so badly. I feel sad for her, she must be young. I think this has happened to a lot of us
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/20 07:06 AM
5

Thanks! I don't see it yet, but sometimes reddit on my phone is a bit fucky. I'll message you back when I get onto my laptop in the morning ☺️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/20 05:22 AM
6

It's me. I needed to hear this, lol. Been in my feelings about a boy who ghosted me in 2018, last time I was living/working in the States. Since I've been home, he's started liking my Insta posts now and again and watching my stories. After he ghosted me. And I still think about him sometimes and kinda miss him. Sigh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/20 05:05 AM
3

Hey there! This seems super interesting. If your mom ever feels up to it, I would love to get a very informal reading! My mom is Taiwanese but very anti-superstition, so it's a part of my Asian heritage I don't really know much about
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/20 05:02 AM
7

Do you have any of the philosopher's names? I'm interested to read more
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/20 04:03 PM
6

Anyone who says shit like that, it's a huge red flag. Auto block and delete
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/20 08:13 AM
12

Uhh why would she even ask his permission to begin with
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/20 10:31 PM
2

Thanks for the info!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/20 02:47 AM
10

God, this is what I needed to hear right now. The only feedback I've gotten otherwise is from my mom, who thinks I'm being a bitch for not being more 'understanding' 🙄 It literally takes 2 minutes to send a text
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/20 08:28 PM
1

Idk anything about him except his name and the way he dresses
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/20 04:04 PM
1

Where did you read about that? I'm interested in what contemporaries had to say about the situation
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/20 10:24 AM
3

Not even a relationship, I ended a friendship over my so-called "friend" screaming this at me in front of a bunch of people. If a bf said that to me, even in private, I would be absolutely 100% done
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/20 10:03 AM
1

I thought you said Marilyn Manson at first and I thought that was pretty cool of him, but this is nice too
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/20 09:48 AM
5

I'm in this situation with one of my friends rn. We're finally both single at the same time for the first time in the 6 years we've known each other. I kind of thought that when we met up again, maybe something more serious would happen (since we have always had really deep and stimulating conversations, I thought things were a bit deeper), but nope. He doesn't want to be 'distracted' from work, and he's 'too busy' to message me during the day (as if it takes more than a minute to send off a tex…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/20 09:39 AM
16

When I lived with my ex in college, we had an off-campus apartment for a while with 2 bedrooms. After a few months, we decided we were going to sublet one out. Well, one day I think I was either out somewhere or possibly even in the shower (??) when my bf at the time had a guy come to look at the room. I didn't get to interact with him, obviously. After he left, my ex was just like, "Yup, I told that guy he's going to move in next week, on the same day I leave town for 5 days (my ex was about to…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/20 08:57 AM
33

The invention of agriculture
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/20 08:26 AM
6

I had to Google who that is, but the stuff that came up about that James Sears guy was fucking gross. Out of morbid curiosity, can I ask what "techniques" he used to try and pick you up? He sounds like a huge creep
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/20 08:55 AM
5

Catherine of Aragon was Henry's first wife, and according to Wikipedia, she was actually older than him - she was 24 and he was 19 when they got married. I think you're referring to Anne of Cleves: the first time they met Henry disguised himself as a courtier (according to the whole courtly love tradition, she was supposed to still be able to recognize him as her 'true love'/the king despite the commoners clothing), but Anne didn't recognize him, even after he grabbed her and kissed her, until h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/20 08:35 AM
17

Yeah. A guy I had hooked up with once asked if he could kiss me in the rain. I was so turned off and annoyed by this (in addition to his awkward/desperate pursuit of me for the whole week post-hookup, which I had realized was a mistake almost immediately after it happened) that I just said "No, sorry" and walked away. I found it SO irritating and cringey that he would think that was something I would find romantic. I did feel kinda bad for him - I don't think he was a bad guy at all, he was just…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/20 08:14 AM
6

My ex and I used to use each other's phones almost interchangeably. Whichever one was closest, we'd just use for Facebook, text messages, calls. I never felt weird about it or like I had a reason to snoop, and I don't think he ever did it to me either
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/20 11:48 PM
50

I'm Asian too, and my guess is possibly that Asian girls tend to be more sheltered, so we choose guys that are maybe not so great for us due to naivety. Vice versa, trashy loser men go for us because we seem naive or inexperienced. I've definitely been with more than a couple losers due to this before I got more life experience
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/20 04:10 AM
1

https://youtu.be/zW1uN0SjKPY
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/20 10:45 PM
26

Reminds me of a book I read in college called "Can the Subaltern Speak". The book is about colonialism (specifically in India), but one of the main points is that the oppressed actually can't speak/have freedom of speech, because there is no communication if the oppressor refuses to listen. It's like that old joke question - if a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/20 10:44 AM
2

15 and 17 is a bigger difference than 19 and 21, which is a bigger difference than 28 and 30. It's not about the literal number of years, it's about the life experience.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/20 09:29 AM
1

WOW, thank you so much!! Will try this after the next grocery shop and let you know how it goes!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/20 03:10 AM
11

Omg girl please share! I've tried and failed to make good masala SO many times, idk how I keep fucking up the spices
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/20 06:16 AM
35

Men who hire sex workers show how they truly feel about women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/20 09:07 AM
3

Sounds like Harvest Moon! I'm in.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/20 08:59 AM
9

If you Google it, there are sites that can restore deleted comments. When I want to delete one of my comments, I edit it to remove all the words, then delete it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/20 11:13 PM
3

I used to feel flattered when I was like 17 - 20ish, but it gets old really fast. I just don't care anymore. I already know I'm hot
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/20 01:16 AM
7

It kinda sucks to be a person who's into geeky shit but not poly, lol. I had a group I played board games with who I never suspected of it, but lo and behold, in the end they turned out to be poly too lmao
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/20 01:01 AM
4

Childish af. Dude did you a favor by exposing his bullshit early on so you don't have to waste anymore time on him
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/20 11:44 PM
3

Same. I've stripped fully nude in female-only hostel rooms before (with other women who didn't care. It was filled with Scandinavians, haha). Idgaf if other women are looking at me, even if they're lesbians
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/20 11:15 PM
1

I'm DD and I'm like 50/50 on wearing bras. I like them when they fit well and I'm going somewhere where I want to show off a bit, but if it's hot out and I don't give a fuck about how I look, I don't bother and it's perfectly comfortable that way too
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/20 11:12 PM
6

I'm 32DD and depending on the shirt, I go braless pretty often, especially in the summer! You just have to get used to the feeling cause it does feel very exposed at first, haha
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/20 11:09 PM
17

I went topless at the beach in Spain and holy shit, it felt sooooo nice omg. I wish people in America would chill tf out with the fundamentalism. My body is my house, it doesn't need to be constantly sexualized
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/20 11:08 PM
11

Since I've been in quarantine, I've: Gotten back into sketching Worked on my skincare and have started to see results Started eating better and lost 10lbs Exercised Discovered a ton of new music I love and started making my own tracks in Fruity Loops Gotten back in touch with old friends Fixed my relationship with my mom Journaled regularly Began to work out longterm goals for myself I'm feeling pretty good about everything at the moment (:
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/20 03:08 AM
2

I would play the shit out of that game!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/20 08:15 AM
2

I don't mind people asking me where I'm from as long as they don't badger me further once I've already told them my home city in the States. And as long as they don't ask where I'm "really" from. That's what I meant in my last post. Tbf, my white friends get asked this question too - the city I'm from has a lot of universities and people move here from all over for school, so it's a pretty common question. It just depends on how they ask But yeah a good amount of them do weed themselves out by a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/20 02:51 AM
21

My first partner HATED cuddling and any form of affection that wasn't sex. When we broke up, he literally said to me that there are no men who enjoy that stuff
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/20 02:42 AM
16

Same. I'm an extremely touchy person with people I love, and it always made me feel so shitty to put in all the effort of giving my boyfriend's good head rubs and massages (not to mention head) and either not have it reciprocated at all, or to have it reciprocated in an extremely half-hearted way for like 5 minutes with complaints if I tried to give any direction
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/20 02:41 AM
1

I would take that as a red flag too. Tbh, most people I meet in general either don't mention it until later on in a conversation, which I don't mind if the vibe is good (and as long as it's not one of the first things they say) or don't say anything until I bring it up. If I mention I lived in Vietnam last year, a lot of people will ask if I speak Vietnamese, but I know what they're actually getting at 😒 I don't really get defensive about it though unless it's the first question out of someone's…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/20 02:14 AM
4

I agree. I purposely never mention anything about my race the first time I meet someone I might be interested in, just to see if they'll mention it (I'm Asian-American too). If my race is one of the first things they mention/ask about - in any capacity - that's a huge red flag to me
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/20 10:51 PM
2

I'm Asian-American and my experience has been that most guys don't fetishize me for my race (although I have come across it before, but it's usually really obvious pretty fast). I've exclusively dated outside my race (not just white guys, but also Black and Latino. I'm open to dating all races though), and none of them had had Asian girlfriends before me except one Mexican--American dude who I dumped after like 2 weeks when I realized. They were mostly toxic for other reasons though, lol. Then a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/20 10:42 PM
3

Not even just online, but irl as well. This is why many spaces are now women-only
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/20 10:37 PM
13

I hate the whole smear campaign about "BeRnIe BrOs", that was such bullshit. Most of the people I knew who supported him, including myself, were women. Several of them ran events and became local representatives for him at our university during his first run The DNC would rather see Trump elected than have Bernie as president and that's been obvious since 2016
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/20 09:43 PM
15

I remember. So many people lack critical thinking 🤦‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/20 09:15 PM
3

WHAT, lmao. What a dumb fucking line
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/20 01:25 AM
2

Does the exfoliation help prevent ingrowns? Which one do you use? I'm taking notes, lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/20 11:39 PM
5

I recently found that sub and finally ordered some properly fitting bras, I was soo happy. Unfortunately I've heard of weirdos messaging girls on there and asking for pics to "help them figure out their measurements" 🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/20 11:32 PM
1

Same here. I've at least had some decent conversation through Hinge since it seems easier to weed out losers. I match with so many guys on Tinder who never message me, or just send me low effort shit like 'hi'. There are also more unicorn hunters on Tinder
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/20 09:04 PM
1

Unfortunately I'm stuck doing basic admin work right now, as that's all that's on my resume since I started working 5 years ago. I'm trying to get into a more creative field, possibly working in social media or something, but I'm still working on building a portfolio
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/20 09:01 PM
1

Do you have any tips for finding a job in a new city when you don't live there yet? That's been the biggest obstacle to moving for me
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/20 10:31 AM
4

You have to tell us the canoe story now, lol. It sounds like something from a sitcom 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/20 07:48 AM
6

I've seen this type toooo many times when I was abroad, lol. They're corny af. Kinda sucks if those interests are what you're actually into though :/ Like I'm really into art and music, being outside, traveling and doing all that hippy yoga shit (I actually bathe and have a handle on my life/finances though), so I'm not interested in dating guys in 'traditional' careers like finance, law, engineering, etc. There are a ton of guys in those careers where I live and 99% of them are either boring as…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/20 07:47 AM
11

Oh, are you teaching in Vietnam? I just got back last month from working in Hanoi! My first job there was working with high school kids applying to university in the States (editing essays and tutoring SATs) and the kids were so hardworking and ambitious, it was really cool to see. Definitely the best job I ever had, it felt so empowering to help young women grow and improve themselves (:
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/04/20 11:09 AM
14

I'm pretty conventionally attractive and I almost exclusively get hit on by weird old dudes or egotistical losers. A lot of normal guys get intimidated or think they I get hit on a lot, so they don't even try
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/04/20 11:29 PM
3

Oh that's a good idea!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/04/20 08:58 PM
4

That was it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/04/20 06:04 PM
48

YES, I used to do the same shit and had anxious attachments to men I dated. After doing a lot of self reflection and reading the book about it (will have to look up title, I'm too sleepy rn), I can now recognize the pattern and choose to not date avoidant guys. I also realized that I was subconsciously emulating my parents' toxic relationship and seeking out men who were emotionally distant like my dad. Ugh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/04/20 07:05 AM
29

An emotionally available father figure, lmao. But hey, admitting it is the first step to recovery
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/04/20 07:01 AM
10

This. HVM don't care as much about appearance and will value you for your personality and intelligence. Attractiveness is jut a bonus to them
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/04/20 06:55 AM
15

Why? Isn't this sub about empowering women and helping them? We exclude conventionally attractive women just for being attractive now?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/04/20 02:54 AM
15

For real tho
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/04/20 02:20 AM
15

Yep. My last boyfriend started off wanting to split everything 50/50, which over time morphed into ME paying for everything for both of us, including rent, expensive safety equipment for our motorbikes and taking us on multiple vacations (+ little things like coffee, lunch, drinks, etc. that I never kept track of because I loved him and I like being generous). I cannot think of even a single time when he paid for me that he didn't then hold against me later on. He then had the AUDACITY to kick m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/04/20 02:17 AM
2

Omg what a fucking nightmare of a human being. Sorry you had to deal with that guy, I can totally understand why that would make you cautious!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/04/20 08:28 AM
3

Okay I get why you feel this way, especially since I saw firsthand the way some white men behave in Asia and the way a lot of white guys talk about us/treat us (both here and abroad). When I lived in SEA, I was shocked at just how blatantly predatory a lot of men there were. My experience hasn't been the same, but I'm also very opinionated and vocal about how I feel about being Asian, so usually the trash tends to take itself out. I'm also from the States and have always dated stoner hippy guys …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/04/20 06:38 AM
13

I watched it and holy shit this guy is off his fucking rocker. He has creepy dead eyes and talks like a sociopath
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/04/20 06:20 AM
1

I finally made some real friends and we talk like this, hahaha. It's refreshing af after years of having only male friends
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/04/20 12:06 AM
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