RCougar Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
10	Girl reported me to HR for using F-word. What do I do? Your mistake is not reporting her after every incident. I would never let a coworker yell at me in the office in front of people without reporting it.	/r/MensRights	01/07/26 01:16 PM
3	Moved from the U.S. to Australia for my wife’s family. Now she wants a divorce. Do I stay for my son or go home? Put off divorce as long as possible and move back to the US with your kid. Until you are in the court system there are no custody restrictions. If you can get back into the US with the child and file for divorce here you and the child will be better off. Preferably a state with 50/50 default custody. Make sure you know where all the documents are for your kid and your wife doesn’t. If not the change that immediately. Women normal think about divorce for over a year before mentioning it. Moving t…	/r/Divorce_Men	01/07/26 01:09 PM
7	Separation puts dad at risk of losing house? Might even want to text a friend that you are worried she might falsely claim domestic violence to get you out of the house. Even state she has threatened to do so if you don’t leave. Also that you would never resort to violence because it would put time with your children at risk. Having some items in a text makes it easier to show it time stamped and proves your thought prior to ending up in court.	/r/Divorce_Men	29/06/26 06:14 PM
20	Do I tattle on my ex wife and her paramour? (After divorce is final) Actions need to have consequences otherwise nothing ever changes. Morally I’d inform the business and the wife after everything has cleared and wait another month or so. People will tell you to just let it go, but those people don’t report crimes they see because it’s none of their business. If you want the world to be a better place you have to be a part of that change. It’s important that afterwards you need to let go of that anger and not be rude to your child’s mother. Just be respectful and…	/r/Divorce_Men	22/06/26 05:47 PM
2	Judge’s Pretrial Recommendation in My Illinois Divorce Feels Extremely Unequal – Am I Missing Something? He means for child custody. Not division. Pre trial has no impact because you can appeal unfair distributions which looks bad on the judge.	/r/Divorce_Men	20/06/26 11:30 PM
1	Wife forcing vasectomy A genuine question would be why doesn’t he want to do it. The moment you imply potential answers in the question it shows you are making judgements. You don’t normally bring up being scared or pride till someone says they aren’t sure why. It’s a shaming tactic.	/r/Divorce_Men	16/06/26 08:00 PM
1	Wife forcing vasectomy Except nothing I said was false nor did you state anything to prove it false. It’s an unneeded surgery. An outpatient procedure doesn’t change that it’s still surgery. I didn’t say it was major surgery with days in the hospital. You can manage the pain still admits to it being painful. It does sometimes fail and you either need to get it done again or might get someone pregnant. All of these are facts. I watched my best friend get it done twice and he was miserable for about 5 days each time bef…	/r/Divorce_Men	16/06/26 03:05 PM
3	Wife forcing vasectomy Happy for you, but your story doesn’t help. Chances are dating a single mother will go bad for most men.	/r/Divorce_Men	16/06/26 01:56 PM
2	Wife forcing vasectomy Are you an idiot? A hysterectomy is not the female version of the surgery. Getting tubes tied is pretty easy for her to get with less recovery issues.	/r/Divorce_Men	16/06/26 01:54 PM
-2	Wife forcing vasectomy He doesn’t want to be a manchild like you	/r/Divorce_Men	16/06/26 01:51 PM
-1	Wife forcing vasectomy It’s an unneeded surgery that involves a lot of pain and recovery. It also doesn’t always work. Plus she’s a few years from now longer being able to get pregnant probably. Seems like she might be jealous that she entering her infertile years and he doesn’t have any. I would refuse and tell her if it bothers her that much then how about getting her tubes tied.	/r/Divorce_Men	16/06/26 01:48 PM
-7	Wife forcing vasectomy How about it’s an unneeded surgery that involves a lot of pain and recovery. It also doesn’t always work. Plus she’s a few years from now longer being able to get pregnant probably.	/r/Divorce_Men	16/06/26 01:46 PM
1	Enraged. She can’t serve you herself. She has to use a qualified person and if they can’t you normally need to pay the fee to have an officer try. Otherwise a judge won’t normally grant the publication option. This process takes months and depending on the state you might not even be able to live at the same address for the case to go through. Talk to an attorney immediately and file an appeal and motions against her for abuse of the court through fraud.	/r/Divorce_Men	15/06/26 04:05 PM
26	Enraged. Those two paragraphs make no sense. A default judgment occurs when you don’t respond to being served, but you make reference to being in front of the judge. Default judgments can be reversed if you were not served, but you need to file with the court quickly and have evidence of where you were. Billing at the mailing address that you were actively paying is normally enough.This type of default also takes months, because judges will make them try to serve you for at least 60 to 90 days before the…	/r/Divorce_Men	13/06/26 01:57 AM
1	Total payout during divorce The rarity of this happening in reserve makes your argument trivial. Sucks for it to happen to anyone, but most women won’t marry a man in that situation. It says a lot about you if you made that choice.	/r/Divorce_Men	07/06/26 02:47 AM
12	Financial slavery Your country is broken. Leave and find success elsewhere. Preferably where Canada can’t come after your income.	/r/Divorce_Men	17/03/26 03:05 PM
5	She downgraded What is wrong with you? Many women do this after divorce. Especially if they are controlling because they figure the downgrade will let them assume the alpha role.	/r/Divorce_Men	29/01/26 10:47 PM
4	Second Divorce This sounds like feminist propaganda!	/r/Divorce_Men	21/01/26 03:28 PM
5	Co-sleeping with children Wear sleeping shorts and just lie to her. Never give her any information to use against you. She’s going to use extreme language to use against you. Just tell her you sleep in your shorts. Don’t mention anything about underwear, you never know how a judge might take that. Make sure you have beds for them and document that you put them to bed in them. Take pictures of them in their own beds. If they end up in your bed that is fine, but don’t mention it to her at all. Never put anything in write t…	/r/Divorce_Men	21/01/26 02:39 PM
2	Paying alimony after job loss If she was making twice your salary and you were not paying alimony before then you will not have to unless you agree to it, especially if you were already divorced. If this happened during the divorce then you need the court to input her income at what she was earning and ignore the job loss. This is commonly done to deal with primary breadwinners who make more but quit or get fired to avoid alimony. The concept is that they are capable of making that much again. Even if they go from 6 figures …	/r/Divorce_Men	09/01/26 03:16 PM
2	Am I wrong to divorce simply because I’m not “feeling it” anymore? No kids OP is a moron who doesn’t understand that a marriage requires effort to maintain. This sounds like the same excuse many women give to end their marriages. Stop chasing tingles and be a man that leads in the marriage.	/r/Divorce_Men	08/12/25 03:58 PM
7	Lawyer told me in a divorce I’d be financially wrecked. Wife is emotionally gone. Any dads survive getting hit with this reality? Move out of California and file for divorce in another state. It’s your only hope of getting a better outcome.	/r/Divorce_Men	04/12/25 04:28 PM
28	New studies indicate why women hate men and it is very telling. Most women I’ve met have no idea what emotional intelligence is. Emotional stability is a huge part of it.	/r/Divorce_Men	28/09/25 05:03 AM
4	Trying to fit 2 families together It will be especially hard to remove her afterwards with an adult special needs child in the house. Depending on the situation with the child you could be putting your children at risk. I wouldn’t do it, but if you do have a rent agreement made and charge her rent. She’ll be a tenant and you can use the law to remove her if needed.	/r/Divorce_Men	01/09/25 07:12 PM
3	Is $25k for Retirement Reasonable? Is that $25k above the split. What is the total in all retirement accounts minus what was in the accounts prior to getting married. Her argument doesn’t matter at all and is a poor argument in court if you argue against it. The court will normally split the retirement (minus premarital balance) between each of you. She chose not to work and that is on her in the courts eyes, but if you contributed to your 401k while she wasn’t working that could force some to be transferred to her. What we need …	/r/Divorce_Men	23/08/25 11:01 PM
2	Naive about custody? I sure was.. Just a heads up, but many of us don’t. This is why values and political beliefs matter in a relationship. My daughter has been taught if she ever pulls what her mother did to me what to consequences will be. She agrees what her mother tried to do was awful and no child should ever have to go through that. Everyone needs to remember not to let what happens to us become learned behavior in the next generation.	/r/Divorce_Men	17/08/25 09:37 AM
4	Dating If you tell women you never want to get married again this should be expected. Very few will be okay with this idea even after you explain your good reasoning. They want to get married normally and you are crushing that dream. I normally tell women that I would never rush into marriage with being someone for a long time and only with a prenup. If they say they were hoping to have children and how can that happen in a reasonable amount of time if we end up waiting 7 or 10 years then you just say …	/r/Divorce_Men	09/08/25 01:28 PM
7	I feel like I’m being punished Assets will be split 50/50 but offset by liabilities. If you can’t reciprocate get her to have to file for bankruptcy before the divorce is finalized it will freeze the divorce split until after the bankruptcy resolves. Don’t pay anything for her that you aren’t required to. If she starts missing payments she will be taken to court by the banks and that will force her to file. In the future don’t tolerate bad behavior.	/r/Divorce_Men	15/07/25 10:19 PM
5	Shocking trends with women and divorce You understand partners care for each other. It’s not mothering to take care of a partner. Everyone I’ve been with always appreciated it when I did it for them. If you can’t reciprocate you should expect to be left. You clearly don’t understand the purpose of marriage and relationships. What do you think people get married?	/r/Divorce_Men	15/07/25 10:06 PM
0	She texted me You have to kill me to get ride of me . Try to get recording of them. You can use them in some courts. Keep a journal about what’s in the recordings with the dates and times. If the recordings aren’t allowed then you can use the journal as evidence. Handwritten is better than typing if you can make sure it is legible. The man up shaming language is about convincing you to do what they want. They will be harsh because they are planning to push you out and have nothing to lose by upsetting you. This is how some people act when they stop…	/r/Divorce_Men	29/06/25 02:04 PM
1	She texted me You have to kill me to get ride of me . It sounds like she’s already talked to a lawyer. Unless you have in writing about the open relationship I would assume it’s a trick to get evidence she can claim you committed adultery. Even with an agreement for an open relationship some Judges will not care and you don’t want to give her permission to start replacing you. If she pulls funds to pay off marital debt then the court will not care. The issue is she will probably target premarital debt or passing the funds to relatives to hold. If y…	/r/Divorce_Men	29/06/25 01:51 PM
7	She texted me You have to kill me to get ride of me . The longer you are married the more she will owe you. Don’t get a job no matter what when she says. If the marriage got you citizenship then she is very responsible for you in a way more complicated way then a standard marriage situation. Keep notes of every time she makes threats with events dated. Be the primary caregiver for your kids and don’t give up any of the responsibility to anyone. If she works super late send text messages asking when she’ll be home and never delete any of these messa…	/r/Divorce_Men	28/06/25 05:53 PM
6	Daughter always wants to be at her moms house If they don’t spend any time together it really won’t sadly. This feels like the beginning of parental alienation and would only get worse with less time. Parental alienation can become a permanent mindset. I know plenty of daughters that don’t have a relationship with their father. I’ve dated quite a few. I have a 10 year old and she wants to sleep over as many nights as she can. She has animals at her Mom’s, none at my place because I’m allergic. I live in a condo, but she is okay sleeping any…	/r/Divorce_Men	20/06/25 10:44 PM
0	I am fucking sick and tired of these court of whores. The fact that you mention involving the school, before bringing up that he needs to make these requests in writing/email to the ex shows a lack of awareness for how courts work. If she doesn’t want to coparent you need proof of that. He needs her to confirm saying there is no homework and if she says there is none at the exchange he needs to send that in an email to his ex and have her confirm. If she doesn’t reply the courts will view that in his favor. Why would you recommend he put in extra w…	/r/Divorce_Men	20/06/25 01:02 PM
1	Found Photos of Teenage Son Drinking in Exwife’s Basement. What Do I Do? Agree with getting full custody, but I think you are way off on talking to ex-wife. That is just giving her advance notice about what he plans to do. He needs to involve the authorities so that he has evidence he can use in court. The ex-wife is clearly not a reasonable person given his story.	/r/Divorce_Men	19/06/25 01:32 PM
2	Would you remarry and have more children in your 40's? When did you start seeing everything go wrong? I have a 10 year old and I’m curious when the signs started to show.	/r/Divorce_Men	18/06/25 12:40 PM
2	Would you remarry and have more children in your 40's? And sadly many of the ones that can solve their own problems will ditch the man they are with after planning and taking advantage of them as much as possible. Not all of course. The good ones will help you build a legacy, but sadly it seems like more than 25% of them won’t.	/r/Divorce_Men	18/06/25 12:38 PM
2	Would you remarry and have more children in your 40's? I’m glad you know about making sure she gets that $1 in the will.	/r/Divorce_Men	18/06/25 02:04 AM
7	Would you remarry and have more children in your 40's? I wouldn’t remarry and have the woman be a stay at home mom. After seeing my ex wife, sisters, neighbors and friends raise kids I truly don’t think any one sex is better at it. My daughter learns more from me than her mother. If I were to remarry I would be happy to have more kids, but I would expect her to worker and contribute. I rarely find women who help with the burdens of life rather than add to them.	/r/Divorce_Men	18/06/25 02:02 AM
1	Why do some dads stop trying after the divorce? Genuinely curious, I’m 19 and still waiting on mine You never know what happened between your mother and father during the divorce. One comment my ex through at me during our divorce was that my daughter wasn’t mine so I shouldn’t be fighting for custody of a 3 year old. I rushed to get a DNA test and luckily she was lying. If she wasn’t I probably would have had my name removed from the birth certificate in court. It’s easier to walk awhile and lead an easier life than be reminded of the pain. I’m glad my daughter is mine and she’s about to turn…	/r/Divorce_Men	09/06/25 12:46 AM
1	Lawyers in NJ Alimony for 10 years marriage demanding permanent alimony now? Yep, a SAHM is very different from this situation and what you did was honorable to help her.	/r/Divorce_Men	02/05/25 06:43 PM
1	Lawyers in NJ Alimony for 10 years marriage demanding permanent alimony now? That lawyer knows he doesn’t have an argument to get that award for your ex. He is trying to leverage the threat of it to get a better agreement or settlement out of you. It’s a very common tactic and they always talk like what they state is fact. Your lawyer will make states like it could happen to get you to settle and avoid court. If you ex and her lawyer don’t quickly start making reasonable offers then you need to push going straight to court. Lawyers will waste time just to get more money …	/r/Divorce_Men	02/05/25 06:42 PM
1	Lawyers in NJ Alimony for 10 years marriage demanding permanent alimony now? That is if the spouse can’t work and there is still limitations based on statutes. If a judge goes outside of what’s allowed then they risk appeal which they hate. If it is a fault based divorce then they can divide more assets to the party that was wronged but they cant punish with lifetime alimony.	/r/Divorce_Men	02/05/25 06:35 PM
5	Lawyers in NJ Alimony for 10 years marriage demanding permanent alimony now? The judge won’t order permanent alimony. It does even exist in NJ anymore. When it did you had to be married for 20 years in NJ to qualify for it. Sounds like your lawyer may be trying to get you to settle, because the lawyer doesn’t want this to go to court. Your incomes are both over $100k and a judge won’t like ordering alimony on it. If he does it won’t be $30k a year and the most it would last is 5 years. If your ex is demanding more it is most likely because the standard amount she would g…	/r/Divorce_Men	02/05/25 03:28 AM
8	Resentment Process, Walkaway Wife Don’t date people who have issues with resentment. It’s a huge red flag. If you date long enough before getting married and practice saying no to her you’ll find out pretty quickly. I dated someone that kept a tally of every wrong she felt occurred. She asked what I was going to do to fix it and when I told her nothing and I’m done with this relationship she started screaming at the top of her lungs. I’ve never seen anyone do this and I have kids. My 10 years old daughter would never think to ac…	/r/Divorce_Men	23/04/25 08:50 PM
3	Is Alimony permanent? Did she work at all? If she was a stay at home mom or wife she might be entitled to a permanent part of that pension if she was married to you while you served. Military pensions have some specific rules to them. If she demands it from the judge he will give her a percentage of your pension and that isn’t considered alimony. It’s like getting half of someone’s 401k, but she gets it on the back end when it pays out. It’s normally a calculation like if you were in for 20 years and married for 15 o…	/r/Divorce_Men	23/04/25 08:17 PM
9	Ex wife admits she is marrying new guy because he is a good dad Your story sounds like a nightmare to most men. A child shouldn’t have a father replacement. You are making a lot of assumptions that this was the best for your children.	/r/Divorce_Men	05/04/25 12:53 PM
3	Estranged wife says “other parents” don’t want a man in the house during a sleepover. I understand and I know that at times you are forced to deal with your ex’s behavior with the children. My daughter caught my ex telling lies multiple times and I would try to separate the action from the person so I could teach the moral lesson. The number of times I’ve had to say “that was wrong people shouldn’t lie, but Mommy is frustrated/angry/sad but she still loves you” started to make me angry with myself. Eventually my daughter realized and had a really frank conversation with me about …	/r/Divorce_Men	03/04/25 02:34 AM
6	Estranged wife says “other parents” don’t want a man in the house during a sleepover. Sounds like you have a good plan. Be involved (which you are) and be the better parent. My ex did the weight gain to 300+ and her whole family makes jokes about me being an example of what not being a good man is in front of my daughter for the last 5 years. I didn’t say anything negative about the ex in front of my daughter and encouraged my daughter to help her mother get healthy. The end result is my daughter is very aware of her mother being the problem and this is coming from a 10 year old.…	/r/Divorce_Men	02/04/25 04:22 PM
7	Estranged wife says “other parents” don’t want a man in the house during a sleepover. So many things wrong here. First I would call the guy and ask him if that is real and if he says yes I would tell him you don’t want him around your daughter to see his reaction. My guess is he’ll say the wife told him to send it. Second is I have a 10 year old daughter and a 2 bedroom condo. She’s had friends over for sleepovers many times over the years. I’m not remarried and no woman loves with me except my daughter. None of the parents ever had issues with their daughters sleeping over. Make…	/r/Divorce_Men	02/04/25 03:00 PM
2	When men say they don't care how much she makes Yes! I made the mistake of displacing myself when I got married. Her family wasn’t supportive and always thought I should have a job over 90 minutes away. My little girl actually hates them for the comments they make and loves my side of the family for not making comments at all about her mother. This also resulted in her wanting to try my hobbies and enjoying them. It pays to have proper boundaries and not being a demanding nag.	/r/Divorce_Men	20/03/25 01:15 PM
6	When men say they don't care how much she makes You are correct. You also get a lifestyle increase or can save for retirement faster. Just make sure both are on the same page. Two people making 120k is more than one person making that. The issue is childcare if you have kids. It’s a short term cost that goes away after a few years and if one of you work from home. This can cause stress issues though. I worked from home and my jealous ex didn’t like it. She filed for divorce and claimed I didn’t parent and was lazy deadbeat. She wanted the hou…	/r/Divorce_Men	20/03/25 12:14 PM
1	Attorney dropped me 2 months before final hearing. I’m in MD, so I don’t know any contacts in your state. I only found out about the Attorney Grievance Commission, because the Accounting firm I worked for does their yearly audit and I was assigned to it for 3 years. I always felt like the commission doesn’t do enough to inform the public of it’s existence.	/r/Divorce_Men	10/03/25 04:50 AM
6	It’s the little joys of being divorced Hate to say it but those cookies are horrible for you. Over the years they have pushed to make the cookies so processed that the amount of added chemicals now is insane. Good for you getting to eat whatever you want though! Edit: apparently I hit a nerve with someone. It was literally just on Joe Rogan how the cookies were toxic. Not trying to insult anyone or approve the ex’s behavior. I just like keeping people informed. https://nypost.com/2025/02/28/lifestyle/girl-scout-cookies-found-with-tox…	/r/Divorce_Men	09/03/25 01:27 PM
2	Attorney dropped me 2 months before final hearing. A female attorney can be a good counter to a spouse being aggressive with claims of domestic violence. You need to vet them properly though. Most attorneys promise the world upfront even though they can’t deliver. The best attorney I had was a woman who was the child of divorce and had her mother try to use parental alienation on her to destroy her relationship with her father. She was so jaded over it that she went into family law and only represents men now.	/r/Divorce_Men	09/03/25 08:45 AM
4	Attorney dropped me 2 months before final hearing. Make sure you report this attorney to your state’s attorney grievance commission, if it has one. Keep evidence they were not responding timely and potentially hurting your case while wasting the retainer. The commission in my state investigates and pursues punishment against the attorney. I would force your attorney to put things in writing to hold them accountable. An attorney that only talks by phone will use them to claim you were informed. You should follow up a call with a complaint by emai…	/r/Divorce_Men	09/03/25 08:41 AM
10	Is it me, or do they just seem to be bipolar? This sounds more like BPD. I’m glad you are free of it. Don’t get pulled back in.	/r/Divorce_Men	08/03/25 03:32 PM
2	Preliminary protection order in effect. Facing bogus charge for domestic assault and battery. Secure townhouse rental now? The fact that she trusts you with the kids still and communicates to you about them undermines a protective order she asked for. I’ve seen this argument used in court and it works. Get a lawyer and get temp spousal support started immediately so you have access to funds.	/r/Divorce_Men	05/03/25 02:27 PM
2	Question on divorce settlement If inheritance is used and fully tracked it normally isn’t a part of the split. You mean 14 years max of alimony in most areas. Only a few do lifetime alimony like CA. If you agree to a settlement with no Alimony then the court won’t order it.	/r/Divorce_Men	05/03/25 01:49 PM
18	LinkedIn request from ex She probably wants to track any employment changes so that she knows when to take you back to court to increase child support or something like that.	/r/Divorce_Men	20/02/25 02:10 AM
5	I became too rich to divorce and I feel trapped. If you mixed the inheritance in a bank account that your paycheck is deposited in then you have already commingled funds. You need to separate it and have though records of the inheritance. Separate finances don’t mean anything since all my earned from a job is considered earned by both and a marital asset. Definitely consult an attorney about the state requirements to prove it is not a marital asset.	/r/Divorce_Men	17/01/25 01:38 AM
1	Assaulted by step father Take the recording and get a restraining order against him and potentially your wife that moved him in against your will.	/r/Divorce_Men	06/11/24 12:37 PM
1	Soon to be divorce dad. Could use some honest advice. Thanks He said his spouse is a nurse so alimony is probably not an issue unless he’s making millions every year.	/r/Divorce_Men	17/10/24 07:34 AM
3	I make double what she does, I pay no support @ 50/50 custody I’m fairly sure that child support is not retroactive after a divorce is completed if child custody was included in it. It can definitely be modified going forward, but retroactive is only when nothing is in place and you first go to court or if child custody was never addressed at all.	/r/Divorce_Men	30/08/24 02:23 PM
2	Suing Ex for emotional distress? Get a lawyer and change the locks. If she has a restraining order, but shows up at your place then you can use that to get the restraining order removed. Get a copy of that police report showing you called in and call every time she does it. Make sure you reference that she has a restraining order and showed up at your place. You are calling to protect yourself and for evidence to use in court that she isn’t threatened by you. Film all interactions to protect yourself from false claims.	/r/Divorce_Men	12/06/24 12:46 PM
2	SAH Wife wants Divorce and wants to move the kids out of state You get to put on your argument first and that sets the tone for the case. It’s an advantage unless the person filing is just going to lie. Once proven a liar you are just screwed.	/r/Divorce_Men	03/06/24 05:17 AM
10	SAH Wife wants Divorce and wants to move the kids out of state File the divorce immediately in Texas and get an order that they stay in Texas. There is no way to avoid child support. She can promise and even file an order saying no child support, but child support can be order with a request to the court. She can even claim you didn’t pay and get retro child support. Texas also has limits on child support. If she wants a divorce it is time to stop caring about her. Never let her move out of state or she can file for divorce in that state and you are screwed…	/r/Divorce_Men	03/06/24 05:13 AM
2	Technically not married, but in need of advice.. I agree that’s the safest route to go. He could track any money given, but sometimes that doesn’t matter in court so best to get the order. It will be less than what he’s doing and it will force her to get out. He should charge her rent after the order is in. Actions have consequences and no free rides allowed.	/r/Divorce_Men	11/03/24 01:29 AM
2	Technically not married, but in need of advice.. It doesn’t give her any leverage since they aren’t married. If he moves back in and she files a TRO they might make her leave since it’s his house. The rules are weird when you aren’t married and she doesn’t have a lease or rental agreement. It’s like a guest filing a TRO while visiting. The court will say she has to leave because it’s his property only by ownership. Your other points are great and he should give her nothing and keep receipts for everything he buys for the kids. Definitely save …	/r/Divorce_Men	09/03/24 10:20 PM
7	Very curious on thoughts on this, my ex took off with my daughter at end of October Pull kid out of school and enroll back in the school near you. File for divorce with a new lawyer who won’t play games and won’t waste as much money. Don’t let her establish everything where she is. Enroll the child before you go to court and have the judge sign off on removing mother’s ability to change schools. If you move too slow you are going to get screwed in a custody case. Mother is already planning to go to court but delaying to show the child is established in a new school. No more mis…	/r/Divorce_Men	11/01/24 12:37 PM
3	My wife filed divorce, Should I take some of her asset? The moment the divorce is final you with see even more hate from that family. They are playing “nice” just to get you to comply. I promise they are already undermining you and parental alienation will be a problem. Nothing you do will protect your daughter from how she is treated while with the other half of the family. Document everything and go after your half of the assets. Anyone using comments about being a man is just shaming you, brainwashed or doesn’t have a clue what they are talking ab…	/r/Divorce_Men	08/01/24 05:35 PM
5	Unfaithful ex wife stalling on house sale due to not wanting to sell This is a horrible idea. You would get less money on the sale, hurt your own credit and potentially set yourself up for getting less than half if she takes you to court over it. You have to take her to court and get legal control of the sale along with her removal from the house. You might even convince the judge to allow you a large % of the sale proceeds.	/r/Divorce_Men	06/01/24 06:55 PM
7	Wife asked me to move out this morning… If the house if your biggest asset, then it is also the biggest leverage you have in negotiating. If you move out then you lose that leverage and it will be used against you in court as abandonment. It will give her power for control child support and asset distribution. You should not move out for any reason and will probably have to force the sale of the house in divorce. If she was worried about the children she wouldn't ask you to move out so get that thought out of your mind. Having a fathe…	/r/Divorce_Men	05/01/24 11:29 AM
2	Wife wants me to move out for the month of January, anything I should be concerned about from a legal perspective? Based on mother’s history would you agree he should go for the restraining order now?	/r/Divorce_Men	26/12/23 12:53 AM
10	Wife wants me to move out for the month of January, anything I should be concerned about from a legal perspective? You are being set up to protect herself and gain child custody advantage. If you have to leave you take your child because you feel like the mother isn’t safe for the child to be around. Then you get a court order to remove the mother and move back in. I recommend you skip moving out and get the court to remove the mother and force her into rehab. Never trust any in-laws.	/r/Divorce_Men	26/12/23 12:52 AM
4	Wife wants me to move out for the month of January, anything I should be concerned about from a legal perspective? You are being set up to protect herself and gain child custody advantage. If you have to leave you take your child because you feel like the mother isn’t safe for the child to be around. Then you get a court order to remove the mother and move back in. I recommend you skip moving out and get the court to remove the mother and force her into rehab. Never trust any in-laws.	/r/Divorce_Men	26/12/23 12:52 AM
0	The things people say to single dads. You should report that asshole. He should be fired since his claims about public parks isn’t correct at all.	/r/Divorce_Men	25/12/23 04:26 AM
3	Recently Separated and My Wife May be Siphoning Money into Secret Account You are not civil and cordial if your wife is lying to you about finances. It’s an illusion that a con artist uses to trick a target. Perception isn’t always reality and you should lock everything down and get an accountant in there to make sure nothing else is going on. You might want a hold on your credit so nothing else can be opened in your name during the divorce.	/r/Divorce_Men	25/12/23 03:22 AM
2	Men who pay Child Support - What do you pay per month? Was it the town she grew up in? I would never recommend moving to her hometown. You want to have the support system. I never understood frame in relationships until after my divorce. Now it’s easy to recognize and maintain. Just wish I didn’t have to learn the hard way.	/r/Divorce_Men	19/12/23 05:08 PM
2	I guess I blew up my life Don’t listen to her. Go back home and never leave again or it will be used against you in court. Work on yourself while living there. If she starts fighting with you it’s time to record those fight. She’s looking out for herself not your best interests.	/r/Divorce_Men	14/12/23 11:26 AM
20	Stay at Home Dad Problems A lawyer should be able to get you spousal support and child support. Don’t leave the house or give anything up. She is not your friend, that is a common tactic to trick a spouse. She’ll probably have to pay for your lawyer. The court doesn’t care able paycheck to paycheck. They will make her buy you out of half of the house if she wants it, they will order half the retirement accounts transferred to you, spousal support will be ordered if she made significantly more than you, and the court will…	/r/Divorce_Men	03/12/23 04:59 AM
1	Divorce with kids is crippling, A death sentence to men. The amount of drama an ex can cause in and out of court is dramatic. Men aren’t taught properly about the impact a bad woman can have on your life. My ex interfered with my daughter learning to eat solid food so she could label her special needs and use it to restrict my time. I got overly involved in treatment and took my little girl to Kennedy Krieger. It took till she was 3 years old, but she finally learned to eat solid food. She’s now 9 and fully understands her mother has issues without me…	/r/Divorce_Men	03/12/23 04:13 AM
4	Divorce with kids is crippling, A death sentence to men. There are a lot of pro se Dad groups on Facebook that can help and I suggest filing for online access to documents for the cases with the court. You can pull up all motions and evidence ever filed on the case. I suggest not signing up for online filing because some courts restrict you to only online filing after that which can get messy. Took awhile to sort because the court didn’t understand why I was doing this instead of my lawyer. I would recommend every Dad do this on their divorce case bec…	/r/Divorce_Men	02/12/23 09:50 PM
2	Divorce with kids is crippling, A death sentence to men. If he gets caught some of these will result in major penalties. I would stick strictly to administrative violation and stay away from the personal/relationship items.	/r/Divorce_Men	02/12/23 06:53 PM
3	Divorce with kids is crippling, A death sentence to men. Make sure you put those communications to your lawyer in writing and demand a response in writing. There were plenty of times I would email a lawyer and receive a call to respond. Lawyers will always protect themselves first so follow up with email recap confirmation and follow up messages in writing when they act dodgy. Email is your friend and if you have to report them to the bar association this is your evidence to show they didn’t provide proper representation.	/r/Divorce_Men	02/12/23 06:49 PM
7	Divorce with kids is crippling, A death sentence to men. Your lawyer is awful. If she doesn’t receive any penalty for her actions then she has no reason to stop. If she knows this is hurting you then she is probably getting exactly what she wants. A common tactic in court is to make everything so costly that the opposing party gives up and she gets everything she wants. I dealt with this drama in my divorce and after the divorce was final and the court became very aware of her actions and dishonesty I switched to pro se. I’ve beaten multiple lawyers s…	/r/Divorce_Men	02/12/23 06:42 PM