ROCTB17 Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
1	Looking for some thoughts		ROCTB17	/r/Divorce_Men	01/08/24 12:37 AM

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
8	A small gesture, but it hurts. If you want her back you must first give her exactly what she’s asked for, a life that does not include you or anything tied to your previous relationship. You 100% did the right thing leaving the house this last time, now take the next step and end those visits altogether. She wanted this, give it to her. And suffer in silence. You don’t have to pretend you’re alright but don’t let her see you be weak.	/r/Divorce_Men	24/08/24 12:37 PM
2	Was marriage worth it? Marriage is a non-stop effort of endless compromise, understanding and empathy. And you’ll never have to work harder at anything in your life to even approach your marriage being called successful. Life will try to undermine you in every conceivable way and if you don’t have the experience to battle your way out you’ll be put down right in the middle of the ring. To so many people it’s just this thing you’re supposed to do, but once the shine is gone are you still going to want it?	/r/Divorce_Men	23/08/24 09:28 PM
5	Was marriage worth it? You are way too young to even think about getting married.	/r/Divorce_Men	23/08/24 09:17 PM
3	Looking for some thoughts I love the comparison! God knows I felt like an employee at times.	/r/Divorce_Men	01/08/24 01:27 AM
2	Looking for some thoughts I’ve gone as scorched earth as possible without being an asshole, and that’s mainly because I will not make my child have to live that kind of life. I will always be polite, I just don’t consider her a friend. Our parenting plan doesn’t really require us to have exchanges so it’s possible for little to no contact. Been a couple of days now, maybe she’s finally getting it.	/r/Divorce_Men	01/08/24 01:10 AM
1	Looking for some thoughts When she told me her fiancé was moving in I told her in no uncertain terms I was not her friend and contact should be urgent situations related to our child only. We share custody so there’s no info from daycare or anywhere else that we don’t both have the same access to. It’s just hard to understand at this point when she’s so deeply into something with someone else.	/r/Divorce_Men	01/08/24 01:03 AM
1	Looking for some thoughts Forgot to add getting divorced was her choice.	/r/Divorce_Men	01/08/24 12:52 AM
1	Looking for some thoughts It’s not random, been going on since the day I left.	/r/Divorce_Men	01/08/24 12:51 AM
2	Struggling with STBXW’s glow-up Very normal feelings to have. You’re early in the game though, remember at one point Atlanta was up 28-3. Suffer the pain and let time slowly work its magic, one day at a time. And do yourself one big favor, DO NOT check on her, live in the dark as to what she’s doing.	/r/Divorce_Men	26/07/24 12:31 PM
6	Today would have been 7 years She knows. Trust me.	/r/Divorce_Men	22/07/24 01:03 PM
2	The loneliest Father’s Day If you spend too much time regretting what you don’t have there won’t be any time left to enjoy what you do have. I’m sad for my three year old daughter every single day, but I’ve finally begun making beautiful memories of just the two of us. Going on a short road trip tomorrow and the daddy/daughter time will be priceless.	/r/Divorce_Men	21/06/24 12:05 AM
2	I Can’t Stop Crying Today The temptation to know what’s going on will be overwhelming. We do it hoping we’ll find something to hold onto, but we usually end up finding something quite the opposite. Ignorance is bliss. Accept this. Give her what she’s asked for, you to be out of her life. That doesn’t mean down the road things can’t change, but that time is not now. All you can do is push her farther away and make yourself look weak in the process. Don’t be an asshole and don’t be love sick, be indifferent. Treat her as y…	/r/Divorce_Men	06/06/24 12:30 PM
11	I Can’t Stop Crying Today I want to give you some advice that’s not directly related to your post, and it’s because I remember the pain you’re going through right now. Do not let it control the choices you make regarding your wife. You’re probably holding onto hope right now of getting her back, but for that to happen you must give her what she wants. Don’t beg, don’t plead and don’t try. Let her experience life without you. And better yet make her wonder. If you’re on social media deactivate your accounts. Don’t check u…	/r/Divorce_Men	06/06/24 01:42 AM
-4	What do I do? You’re focusing on the wrong part of this situation, what she did rather than why she did it? Marriages and relationships grow stale and mundane, especially for women. What may have seemed fine to you may have been something she reached a point of no longer being able to deal with. I’m not defending her choices but if your marriage means something to you then go to counseling for the right reasons. Not to learn how to forgive her and trust her again but rather what was wrong in your relationship…	/r/Divorce_Men	23/05/24 12:58 PM
6	My First Real WTF Incident with XW. How would you handle? Let it go. It was your daughter’s decision, don’t put what you want ahead of what she wants. The only issue is you weren’t told in advance, but you had your say there and no matter what excuse your ex gave your message was heard.	/r/Divorce_Men	20/05/24 12:47 AM
1	What is the worst that can happen? Bad move bro, fault or no fault. Take the 50/50 kids thing and run with it. Don’t walk, run. And if you moved out of your house and into a tent run back there too. Get a mediator and let that person be your go between, cheaper than a lawyer. You’ll need one of those too but don’t use them as a me$$enger. You won’t feel this way forever but whatever you agree to and sign can potentially leave you feeling far worse once the dust settles.	/r/Divorce_Men	17/05/24 01:42 PM
3	There's nothing I can do. Not at the moment you can’t. First you have to give her what she thinks she wants and not interfere. Let the process play out. Don’t chase her and don’t chase her away, does that make sense?	/r/Divorce_Men	17/05/24 12:56 AM
3	There's nothing I can do. Don’t give her that satisfaction. Treat her like you would treat anybody else asking you how you’re doing. My approach is I respond if she texts but I seldom if ever initiate.	/r/Divorce_Men	16/05/24 11:01 PM
10	There's nothing I can do. You have to hang on friend and let this happen. It will be unbearable pain at times but with each day that passes you’ll come close and closer to the other side. My advice to you is to suffer quietly as any other way is only going to make it worse. Go for runs or bike rides, anything that gets things flowing in your body and your mind. I have been where you are. You can and you will survive this.	/r/Divorce_Men	16/05/24 11:00 PM
2	Mother's day Terrible situation but this is for your kids. If you’d take a bullet for them which I’m certain you would you can do this. It shows that no matter what she did to you you’re strong enough to rise above and do what is right. Best of luck to you.	/r/Divorce_Men	09/05/24 11:01 PM
5	Mother's day My ex wife is engaged and I just ordered her a large bouquet of flowers and put the names of her three children on the card. Rise above everything and do what teaches your kids the best lesson. Side note, two of her kids are my ex step-kids but I don’t leave them out. We’ve been divorced two years and I haven’t missed sending either of them something for their birthdays, holidays or special occasions, even when money was tight.	/r/Divorce_Men	09/05/24 10:59 PM
2	This is my reality now Completely with you on almost everything. Just crossed the two year mark and I go back and forth between missing her and being angry at her. I have zero interest in dating because I never want to go through this feeling again. I’d rather die alone. My focus now is my three year old daughter and working on myself physically (gym) and mentally (back to school for degree). It’s rough. Keep waiting for the day this situation isn’t my first and last thought each day. If we didn’t share a child I woul…	/r/Divorce_Men	06/05/24 07:39 PM
2	Going too Fast? Best advice I can give you is let it happen. Give her what she thinks she wants, the divorce and her boss and peacefully move on to working on yourself and focusing on your kids. Your attorney will make sure any settlement is fair. Any direct communication right now is only going to create more bad feelings. Let this happen today for a brighter tomorrow. Don’t let anger, resentment and bitterness be the emotions that control your actions.	/r/Divorce_Men	03/04/24 06:03 PM