ReallyBigMomma Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
11	If people can say that the reason the suicide rate among transexuals is so high because of the way society treats them. Then its perfectly acceptable to apply the same logic to suicide among men What would support look like? As a gay man of color, I am always reminded how vulnerable my communities are to suicide and that's great. but even then, the support feels very flat most of the time -- or at least online or by general friends. ("Do self care!" "It's ok to cry!" "go to therapy!") But having had depression and attempted suicide in the past, this support feels phony. Sometimes, friends or even people we are dating can't deliver the mental health support we need -- whether its becau…	/r/MensRights	28/02/19 06:41 PM
-1	If people can say that the reason the suicide rate among transexuals is so high because of the way society treats them. Then its perfectly acceptable to apply the same logic to suicide among men I think sex is often misrepresented as being a clean binary. Radiolab did a pretty cool podcast on the topic of sex and gender and discussed the history of how we've determined biological sex. Nothing seems to work completely, whether its having by genitalia, x/y chromosomes, estrogen/testosterone -- there are a lot of cases of people being in between, too variable to be consistent. This is also evidenced in sex determination tests done for the Olympics. https://www.wnycstudios.org/story/gonads-…	/r/MensRights	28/02/19 06:23 PM
2	Why is it that the only positive traits in a man are the feminine ones? How is being stoic, tough, and strong wrong? It's strawmanning like hell. Both sides do it, and it's really frustrating because it's distracting folks from addressing real change in people's lives.	/r/MensRights	05/02/19 06:01 PM
1	Why is it that the only positive traits in a man are the feminine ones? How is being stoic, tough, and strong wrong? That's interesting! I didn't know this and it makes for such an succinct reframing.	/r/MensRights	05/02/19 06:00 PM
1	Why is it that the only positive traits in a man are the feminine ones? How is being stoic, tough, and strong wrong? Oh I agree that these behaviors aren't inherently masculine or feminine and should be referred to in a less gendered fashion if we are to achieve any sort of equitable standard. But I think that when people talk about "toxic masculinity" they are talking about these negative behaviors insofar that we still live in a society that largely genders our behaviors, whether we want to or not. "Toxic masculinity" teeters between being just damaging behavior and expected behavior for men, but it comes do…	/r/MensRights	05/02/19 05:59 PM
61	Why is it that the only positive traits in a man are the feminine ones? How is being stoic, tough, and strong wrong? Idk. I feel like those traits are rewarded in most spaces, especially outside of tumblr. I mean, Tumblr is in no way representative of most society. Anyway, when it comes to feminine traits being celebrated, i think it's important to distinguish how they are celebrated and why. If a boy crying is seen as good because it means that they feel comfortable expressing emotion, that's great. But if it means they are clinically depressed and not getting the help they might need, not so much. The same t…	/r/MensRights	04/02/19 07:36 PM
2	Got called an "Incel", "frail man", and "sexist" for disliking the Gillette ad I kind of like the ad? Growing up as a nerdy gay kid, I related to the boy crying, being chased by other boys -- being bullied for not fitting into the definition of boyhood/manhood. I think that the ad is trying to recenter what it means to be honorable and good as a man. The #metoo made the ad feel bifurcated -- without it, this could've easily been an ad to address some of the negative social pressures that guys face. Also ironic that you're called an incel given the subject matter in it.	/r/MensRights	15/01/19 10:57 PM
3	"If you think you were raped, then you were raped". This is the advice given to women on TwoXChromosomes As a guy who was sexually coerced into having sex by another guy when I was younger, this is something I struggle with. On one hand, I spent years doubting if what I experienced was "enough" to warrant the psychic pain; on the other, I acknowledged that what I experienced was not categorically the same as violent rape. This kinda stuff speaks to validating my memories and feelings; and that has been the first step to unraveling the mess and improving. But when my now partner asked me if I ever w…	/r/MensRights	25/11/18 01:34 AM
3	white woman calls cops on black child she says touched her butt I'd venture to say there's a layer of racism. Lots of young black children are often treated as adults, as evidenced by instances of grown adults or police using physical force on preteens or even kids.	/r/MensRights	12/10/18 10:05 PM
2	Well done: Swiss parliament votes to extend definition of rape to male victims This should be highlighted. Thanks for writing this out.	/r/MensRights	02/10/18 12:30 AM
0	Why you can't win with a college feminist.... Seems like identity politics. Both parties are talking about the same issues and probably can agree on many things but it’s the labels that they end up bickering about? Personally I identify as a feminist insofar that it’s a political tag to signal my interest in gender equality. MRA is way too politicized and carries too much baggage in most spaces to use be a viable label for me.	/r/MensRights	20/09/18 08:12 PM
1	On Gender Double Standards And Male Strippers Sexual abuse is a really broad term, but i suppose so -- from gay/bi men and straight women. From the straight men that explicitly shared their identity, they've been respectful, if not encouraging. But I can't say I've come across many straight guys at all-men/mixed gender gay bars.	/r/MensRights	18/04/18 10:01 PM
6	On Gender Double Standards And Male Strippers I work as a gogo dancer at gay bars. I have danced on and off for about 2 years now, dancing at bars/clubs with all sorts of demographics. It's overall been a good way of making extra money to meet rent and all, but there have been many instances where challenges (like body shaming/pressures, harassment, sexual solicitation) arose, usually in more mixed-gender venues. I understand that part of the job is selling sex (looking like someone's ideal, playing to their desires, etc) but I have always …	/r/MensRights	18/04/18 08:04 PM
24	Suspended male student files suit against Yale for gender discrimination. The lawsuit contends that two female students conspired to falsely accuse him of groping them. Lawyers argue that b/c of 'gender bias,' the school 'failed to conduct a thorough and impartial investigation.' This happened to me in my undergrad at a liberal arts school. I may not agree with everything in this sub, but when someone's due process is mishandled by political pandering to popular feminism, like mine was, i can't help but to get pissed.	/r/MensRights	02/02/18 03:25 PM
3	Privilege Men make up the majority of the homeless population and are statistically more vulnerable/at risk of substance abuse/mental health disorders. Women are statistically more vulnerable to battery and rape. It's not a pretty picture either way, especially when there are limited resources going around.	/r/MensRights	22/01/18 07:56 PM
1	Why can't men wear shorts in the workpalce or in bars, women wear short skirts and shorts in these places My assumption was that this is related to women entering the workforce and being required to dress pretty, to look like proper women as they entered a new sector of society. Now that we have instituted gender discrimination laws in the workplace, this reasoning isn't viable but haven't been "rolled back," per sey. I always thought men's office wear was primarily meant to be professional and neutral. And while the 3-piece suit is still a valued norm in many workplaces, I don't think that's across…	/r/MensRights	29/12/17 06:41 PM
1	Accused students presumed guilty at three in four top colleges, survey finds Basically -- per the reigning perspective, any sex while under the influence is non-consensual but the penetrator is still accountable for their actions, as if it doesn't take two to tango. I get that there are cases where someone can get really violent or forceful when under the influence, but I think men are stereotyped to be the dominant, active player in sex too often. In my case, i was a gay man found to be enact violent, BDSM fantasies on my lesbian friend while under the influence of acid…	/r/MensRights	07/09/17 06:20 PM
1	Rich model: "‘You can be homeless and still have white privilege" I work in the non-profit sector providing services to many clients who are homeless in the West coast of the US. Many of our non-white homeless clients face barriers that our white clients do not when trying to engage in services. Some are more controllable than others, like racial bias among staff evident in their service delivery. Others are more institutional and would take more work, such as lack of language accessibility. I tried combing through some articles that investigated into racial b…	/r/MensRights	06/09/17 10:41 PM
-4	Rich model: "‘You can be homeless and still have white privilege" White privilege and class privilege are sometimes related but should not be conflated to be one of the same. It's a slippery slope once you start looking at white homeless persons or lower-income, white folk, say, in the Apalachians; these groups do not enjoy the same lifestyle that the left stereotypes of white Americans but that does not mean that they cannot benefit from being white when receiving services at a local non-profit or shelters. Practically speaking, I think that white privilege a…	/r/MensRights	06/09/17 09:34 PM
32	Accused students presumed guilty at three in four top colleges, survey finds This applied to me about 3 years ago. Suspended for nonconsensual sexual contact for an incident that the victim regretted on whim and pressure of her super feminist friends. We try to hold courts of law as neutral as possible, but colleges have many reasons to have a bias (admissions, board members, trustees, etc) and those influences negatively impact the impartiality present (or not) in their reviews. I went to a fairly liberal school and considered it to be ahead of the curve on most issues …	/r/MensRights	06/09/17 08:57 PM
13	It's not just us. 'Dunkirk' critics mocked for slamming the movie's cast. Have we hit a watershed moment? That would be pretty refreshing among war films! We don't need to "colorbend" history especially since history has been diverse and presently diluted.	/r/MensRights	03/08/17 04:16 PM
1	Father's Day cards banned in Scottish schools - Telegraph I never liked mothers/fathers day. Growing up raised by a single mother, I always made my fathers day crafts dedicated to my mom -- and some peers were weird about that. I think the days should be seen as "parent/gaurdian" day, or something. To give an opportunity to the child to express their gratitude to the adult who they feel fills that role best.	/r/MensRights	10/07/17 06:40 PM
1	Feminist thoughts regarding MRAs Inb4: Address racial and lgbt intersections here guys. Y'all lack this a lot and can definitely benefit from looking at different issues through a more nuanced lens rather than conforming to the same narratives of men and women. Kek	/r/MensRights	27/06/16 08:43 AM
-2	Hundreds of policewomen fail fitness tests I don't know if people arguing against fitness tests return to biological difference as a legitimate grounds for claiming unegalitarian standards, but it would be interesting to see if the same situation occurs in other male-dominated careers, like the military.	/r/MensRights	15/02/14 02:45 PM
5	Just a reminder that white males commit suicide at a massively disproportionate rate than other groups (e.g. Over 10x more than black women). Take care y'all, watch out for the warning signs of your f Based off this it appears you are right. Though I don't know how they exactly counted American Natives.	/r/MensRights	24/02/13 11:47 PM
1	I think young men should grow up exposed to stories like this (Comic) Nice guy syndrome makes me cringe all the damn time.	/r/MensRights	09/11/12 04:12 PM
1	Woman beats up a male religious leader in Iran - feminists/manginas cheer her on. What if the shoe was on the other foot? The government condemns short, tight and colorful coats and loosely tied head-scarves, and routinely organizes police patrols to enforce the Islamic dress code. Public surveillance increases in summer when some women opt for flimsier clothing. We have the right to disagree with other's expectations and also the knowledge that we can safely exercise this right; where as in this case, the social and governmental institutions probably rob Iranian women of that safety. You're taking your privileges …	/r/MensRights	21/09/12 03:43 PM