| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 25 | A reflection from "ELONAIRES" | Recent_Impress_3618 | /r/Divorce_Men | 14/10/25 06:42 AM | |
| 24 | New woman, parallel relationship,anyone else been here? | Recent_Impress_3618 | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/06/26 11:01 PM | |
| 8 | When did you know it was over? | Recent_Impress_3618 | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/02/25 05:28 AM |
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Divorce with kidsYep hearing those lines now, she’s managed to fully turn the daughter against me. | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/07/26 07:07 AM |
| 5 | ShatteredDon’t look at her messages man, who cares, she’s gone, in the past. Move on. Some will say wait for a year to date after you split. I didn’t and it was a good move. | /r/Divorce_Men | 22/07/26 04:30 PM |
| 3 | We always knew it was going to end…. But the end is actually tougher than I thought.At this point too, just a low mood all the time. Coming to terms with how badly I was treated throughout the marriage and getting cleaned out. The loneliness is hard. I’m having difficulties with my teenage kids too and she seems to be doing so much better as she lets them do as they please and blows smoke up their asses. I met a shrink last week about it and his advice was just to keep the body active and the brain busy. He recommended starting each day with a plan. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/07/26 07:44 AM |
| 11 | All this shit show has taught me is what a fkng waste everything really is.One thing you picked up on “being good is pointless”. I find that particularly relevant now that I’m in the midst of a divorce but still having to pick up every single bill. My lawyer says keep paying, don’t touch your 401K etc. I’ve also seen guys pull down the shutters, stop paying the bills, draw down cash from 401K’s and move money to family members without being penalised. Good post, I suppose if I never married I wouldn’t have the three children who no longer talk to me. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/07/26 07:06 AM |
| 7 | All this shit show has taught me is what a fkng waste everything really is.Stay like that | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/07/26 07:01 AM |
| 3 | My wife (32F) told me (44M) she wants to separate — 30 hours after the kids and I joined her in SpainDon’t demean yourself by asking to see her phone, that’s classed as coercion in case you don’t realise. You need to be really careful about these things, limit contact. Don’t argue, she’s made the call don’t challenge. It’s as plain as day what’s happening here, you don’t need to see it on a screen. Next she’ll be heading down the DV, coercive control, Intimidation route. | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/07/26 05:23 AM |
| 6 | My wife (32F) told me (44M) she wants to separate — 30 hours after the kids and I joined her in SpainUnique story on the living apart and then being blindsided. On the whole year out thing she’s now blown it up, the deal is off. A lot of women would just soldier on for the year and address things when home hoping things might get better. It’s obvious she’s met someone else or at least got a taste for freedom. For that reason you need to take a hard position on what’s right for you and your relationship with the children. For me that wouldn’t be in Spain but back in the environment they’re used … | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/07/26 05:10 AM |
| 1 | I could use some help.This is the way, ⬆️ We need this in a sticky. | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/07/26 10:38 PM |
| 3 | Everyone wins except the childrenSummed it up in 5 words. A salutary lesson for those of you reading this thread, as soon as soon to be ex wives start on this path, sell your guns and remove alcohol from the house. | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/07/26 08:31 PM |
| 1 | Family Relationship Centres - Family Dispute ResolutionHard luck man. Do you need a new car? Maybe buy a classic 911 or something that won’t depreciate and you can sell it after the split. | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/07/26 01:54 PM |
| 2 | What to do?My advice, just communicate by WhatsApp regarding the child. Move back into the home. Ignore her and her lawyer until they file, better still, you file. Sounds like it’s gone too for to reconcile. | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/07/26 01:45 PM |
| 4 | Wife Tracking My Activities and Our Travel, Divorce Prep?Just file. | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/07/26 06:11 AM |
| 5 | Going through a nasty divorceDon’t be too hard on yourself. Men go to prison and their wives are waiting on them when they get out. My wife blames me for everything. She’s wrong. | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/07/26 05:43 AM |
| 2 | What led to you/ partner initiating the divorce? Did it happen in stages or spontaneously?Great comment. Sums up my situation. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/07/26 06:09 AM |
| 8 | Home EquityI’m in the same boat, she wants to stay in the family home, she can’t afford to take on the mortgage. She wants me to pay the mortgage and give her my share of the equity in full. She’s digging in but is totally wasting her time, she’s going to be disappointed. It’s a tough world out there as she’s going to find out. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/07/26 09:19 PM |
| 4 | Trying to deal with extreme isolation amid divorceAt 36 you’ll do well. Enjoy your life in Portugal it’s a great country. Get fit, join a 5 a side soccer team, start padel, get on Tinder and start dating. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/07/26 04:04 PM |
| 1 | Divorce Consultancy in USAPost your questions here & Lawyer up. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/07/26 08:50 AM |
| 5 | Had 3 relationships and 1 destroyed my lifeHappening to me at the moment, she’s trying to destroy my reputation, financially and is alienating my late teen children. I have met an amazing caring woman, a widow, owns who her own home and has significant investments. She’s wealthier than I am. Having said that I’ll never be joined financially with another woman, ever. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/07/26 08:47 AM |
| 1 | Pettiness of the spouseI have this blocking the way to my room, making dinner and leaving the mess for me to clean. Hoovering at 11.30pm slapping it off the walls and down on the wooden floor above me. Refusing to pay towards bills. I’m ignoring it. Sit tight, document and look forward to getting out. | /r/Divorce_Men | 03/07/26 01:49 PM |
| 3 | How to show my ex-wife's new boyfriend that he has no authority over my children or me.Determined so 😬 There’s no answer to this. An eye for an eye will make the whole world blind. You’ll suffer the most here, play the long game, be strategic. | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/07/26 07:22 PM |
| 12 | How to show my ex-wife's new boyfriend that he has no authority over my children or me.What a nightmare. I don’t like the way you’re thinking man, you need to calm yourself down. People get killed in these situations. Ignore him. Doesn’t want you on the porch, big deal. Once he doesn’t interfere with your access. | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/07/26 06:52 PM |
| 10 | In retrospect, are you ever just COMPLETELY baffled at how you ignored the red flags?Late 30”s I’m jealous, 56 here at your point in life now. Having said that if the children were small I would have had no life as she without question would have been on a power trip. | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/07/26 10:21 AM |
| 10 | Wife is letting friends know she is considering divorceHad this, a friend of the wife met me and asked me was I still at home? My advice, shut down all conversations other than necessary regarding the children. Continue to pay the bills you’ve always paid. Don’t offer counselling. Don’t try and get things back on track. Contact a lawyer and get it over as soon as possible, these women are never happy. You don’t want to be going into retirement with a toe rag like this. There’s loads of women who’ll value and cherish a good man. | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/07/26 08:53 AM |
| 9 | Spinning the blockWell done, stay away. | /r/Divorce_Men | 29/06/26 11:15 AM |
| 3 | How society treats a divorcee?Personally I don’t care what people think, I’ve both failed and succeeded at lots of things. This won’t be the last failure in my life or theirs. | /r/Divorce_Men | 27/06/26 08:33 PM |
| 3 | Final strawI can relate to this. I’ve met an amazing caring woman. My ex was a hard, controlling ice maiden who only had one pleasure in life, spending my money. | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/06/26 09:45 PM |
| 3 | Preparing myself for the inevitable, seeking adviceHas she ever considered working or trying to make up the shortfall or to improve your family’s situation? My advice, stay unemployed and file. | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/06/26 06:16 AM |
| 2 | Anyone UK based going through divorce?Most UK support groups for men are orientated towards fathers who are hunkered down in the trenches battling high conflict ex wives in rbiased UK family courts. I think you may get support on these groups as they’re all dealing with asset division too. My advice, get the best solicitor you can afford and channel all comms through them. If you’ve no or limited assets walk away. | /r/Divorce_Men | 24/06/26 06:17 PM |
| 1 | Now I know 2I have this, refused to share details of her finances with me but expected me to foot the bill for everything. Secret shopping, despised me and I have well founded suspicions of affairs. Now she’s absolutely toxic as she says she wants a divorce, has sent me a load of legal letters but is refusing to file… anyway I’m filing asap. You’re lucky she moved out. Onward and upwards. | /r/Divorce_Men | 24/06/26 04:05 PM |
| 5 | Do I tattle on my ex wife and her paramour? (After divorce is final)My advice, move on, you know, that’s all that matters. It gave you final closure that a lot of others don’t have. If it wasn’t him it would be someone else. Build your own life now. | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/06/26 10:56 AM |
| 7 | Wife is wanting a divorceFile first, get out quick, get on with your life. It’s hard but a year down the road and you’ll be rid of her. Don’t even consider what could be behind all this, not worth it. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/06/26 03:20 PM |
| 1 | Blocking my ex wife today was harder then me getting the divorce decree the other day.My wife’s family despised me due to her decade long devaluation of me. I had a life outside the home based around sport which she hated. I was a hands on Dad and paid every bill. I gave her a life where should give up work, spend all her time with our children and basically do what she likes. Her family tired of listening to her droning on for years about how unhappy she was supported her discard of me. She them went for the silver bullet. I blocked her and everyone of her family on social media… | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/06/26 12:15 PM |
| 0 | CodependencyCommon excuse for losing attraction, building resentment and a desire to Pass Go to Collect the Lolly. Did you suggest counselling, oh let me guess she refused? She wanted you gone man, end of. Start living your life. Did you really have to leave the home, she wanted a divorce why didn’t she leave? | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/06/26 07:00 PM |
| 3 | Mediation vs lawyer — what actually worked better for you?On the basis you have an agreeable spouse mediation is the way to go 100%. Anything else lawyer up. | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/06/26 02:21 PM |
| 2 | If you started divorce with a mediator and switched to a lawyer- what was the final straw, and did you regret it?How much are you fighting over? If it’s a decent sum and she’s taking the piss which she is, get a lawyer. You really need to put your best foot forward if there’s child custody involved which there is. In my case my ex frustrated the process, things only start moving when you get a lawyer involved and all comms go on record. | /r/Divorce_Men | 14/06/26 06:34 AM |
| 2 | Light at the end of the tunnel, but fuck I’m sad.50/50 and 10k in fees would be a great result for the majority of us here. Having said that the short marriage should be taken into consideration and nothing awarded to her but you do have a son which complicates things. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/06/26 06:17 AM |
| 1 | New woman, parallel relationship,anyone else been here?Thanks man, great post and explains a lot. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/06/26 04:37 AM |
| 1 | New woman, parallel relationship,anyone else been here?I did, a fair few times. Usually responded some ramblings about arguments with her kids, with her mother etc. Ask her the same question a few days later and it’s a different tale. She wasn’t a good liar and forced a narrative in these scenarios. Analysis of her WhatsApp messages over a period of 6 months and you could set your watch as to the times she’d be unavailable. I would call her at 9.30pm and 10.30pm, then you’d get a message at 10.55pm saying she’s tired, going to bed and good night. Ot… | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/06/26 10:17 PM |
| 4 | New woman, parallel relationship,anyone else been here?Well there’s an update for you all, I called it. Told her something didn’t feel right and wished her the best. Literally over three texts. Strange thing is she just said “sorry if she did something”. I said no and wished her the best. And that’s that, 6 months of trips, meals, expressions of love and great sex. No call from her to seek an explanation or a long probing message. I suppose it reinforces the suspicions I’ve had. Sad 😢 | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/06/26 06:19 PM |
| 3 | New woman, parallel relationship,anyone else been here?Tend to agree with this view. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/06/26 03:22 PM |
| 6 | New woman, parallel relationship,anyone else been here?Don’t know if sharing locations would be considered an intrusion in my country. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/06/26 01:06 AM |
| 3 | New woman, parallel relationship,anyone else been here?Yep. Your story resonates, the excuses start making zero sense. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/06/26 01:05 AM |
| 2 | Wife touts savings while I carry billsIf you’re experiencing hassle with this there’s without question a flawed value system behind her outlook. Major red flag and a sign of what the future holds. If she’s not reasonable and fair in relation to expenses, what will she be fair on? When I took stock of my situation I noticed this level of unreasonableness bled into every aspect of our interactions from what pictures hung on the walls to where I stored my sports equipment to how often my parents saw our children. My situation likely re… | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/06/26 05:24 PM |
| 3 | Wife touts savings while I carry billsExactly my situation here, she hid bank statements, was buying online like a woman possessed and used to get deliveries to the post office or her mother’s. 20k handbag collection and a Range Rover under her arse but has no money. As soon as she filed she reduced her hours. | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/06/26 06:07 AM |
| 14 | Wife touts savings while I carry billsAnd this is where it all goes wrong, what’s yours is hers and what’s hers is hers. Sort it out quickly, get her to split the bills. Whatever is left jointly agree to save or spend taking an allowance each. Any pushback, divorce. I was in this exact position, when I stood my ground on an equitable split she divorced me. This is from a woman who hid payslips and bank statements. | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/06/26 05:42 AM |
| 11 | Good experience with female lawyers?I have an amazing female lawyer, she takes no prisoners and is a straight talker. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/06/26 08:33 PM |
| 8 | How to get over attraction for your exThe way she behaved during the divorce was so vile I could never breathe the same air as her again. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/06/26 08:45 AM |
| 1 | Physical Health Wrecked from Divorce?Watch the B12, it’s really serious, you may need a course of injections and continue this for the rest of your life. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/06/26 06:47 AM |
| 4 | From Happily Married to DivorcedSounds like you’re in a great place, no kids, 50 50. Move quickly. Personally I’d work whatever is needed to get out of the business. Cut all ties. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/06/26 06:13 AM |
| 11 | Trying to understand why some divorces feel sudden to one spouseMen put up with a lot of shite, I certainly did. I would have been still prepared to put up with it had she not pulled the trigger. Now I can see that I was being emotionally and financially abused for decades. I was walking around in the haze of telling myself all marriages are like this, comforted by the mere crumbs she gave me every now and again. My advice to all men is decide what you want in a partner; someone who contributes financially, emotionally and is affectionate. A woman who has yo… | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/05/26 08:41 AM |
| 2 | Putting myself out there on some dating apps recentlyMy female lawyer told me to get on the apps. I’m still cohabitating as to move out will set a precedent. I met a lovely woman, a widow with grown up kids. A totally different outlook to the ex. Someone who knows the value of money and has friends & interests. We’ve been doing a lot of stuff together. She’s been a great support to me. | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/05/26 07:02 AM |
| 2 | Has anyone come across this situation and if so what did you do?Anyway you can entice her to commit those threats to txt or email? A record of her saying this will assist you greatly. | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/05/26 10:39 AM |
| 3 | I can’t believe this is my life! Ex has told my children unbelievable lies!I find it so had to understand false claims of DV. Victim here too. The hatred from her is palpable. A local guy here was dealing with an ex wife who kept pushing and pushing him. His children were in their late teens / early 20’s. He’s now in the Philippines working a business development role for Southeast Asia. Apparently he hasn’t looked back. | /r/Divorce_Men | 22/05/26 12:03 PM |
| 1 | How Can Someone Leave the Marriage and Still Feel Abandoned by You?My ex did something similar. I reckon she’s an avoidant. She’s also a materialistic narcissist. Good riddance, took me a year to realise what I was dealing with and pull the tools together to build again. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/05/26 01:02 AM |
| 3 | 14 hours in 50 DaysI feel YOUR Pain ! Sweet Jesus. My kids are 16 to 20. 100% my ex would have pulled this were they younger. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/05/26 12:16 AM |
| 8 | Some advice for young men (from the mom of a newly divorced young man)I’ve lived all this, good post Mom. Thanks. I won a performance based trip to Hawaii at work, she wouldn’t go because of the children. My cut glass presidents club trophy was allowed to be displayed in the living room for a week before being thrown into a drawer unbeknowns to me. | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/05/26 10:31 PM |
| 1 | Would you remarry her again?I could never, ever go back. The woman despises me. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/05/26 06:18 PM |
| 1 | Looking for tips to guard myself betterIt absolutely wasn’t a mistake and look at the insight you have now. There’s a book called Gatekeepers by Shawn Smith, haven’t read it but as I understand it’s got some good insights on helping to identify compatible partners. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/05/26 09:53 AM |
| 1 | Looking for tips to guard myself betterSounds like you’re going after the wrong type of women. This one screams high maintenance, the cheek of her having an issue with your Dad paying for the meal. A great example of something my wife did, turning something positive to negative. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/05/26 07:00 AM |
| 7 | My wife wants a divorce and she’s the breadwinnerShoe on the other foot here, you’re lucky, most of us getting hosed. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/05/26 05:46 AM |
| 16 | I’m a lesbian and this sub is a breath of fresh airLove this quote “ I see so many women post about how divorce is this big reward for them and it’s a new beginning, as if it’s some weird prize to win in life” I can’t understand it either, there’s no winners in divorce. | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/05/26 09:51 AM |
| 4 | So... About Mother's Day?Let the kids sort something. Remind them, give them some money if needed. You do absolutely nothing to show appreciation. | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/05/26 08:40 AM |
| 5 | Would you block a ex for peaceBlock | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/05/26 06:41 AM |
| 2 | Newly wed now soon to divorceAnd most would say those on the spectrum are more rigid. In my case my ex won’t budge on anything and tries to take advantage. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/05/26 04:53 AM |
| 4 | Newly wed now soon to divorceExercise. It will get endorphins flowing. Listen to music, live radio and podcasts all the time. It will give your mind a rest. Swim in the sea, walk, run, work hard, make money. Your new life begins now, this woman wasn’t for you. It’s fantastic you’re not wasting decades on her like most of us here did. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/05/26 04:48 AM |
| 5 | Need advice . Wife agrees to go our separate ways and live apart for good , but still wants to fuck exclusively .Ehhh, nope ! | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/05/26 08:19 PM |
| 6 | What are positive aspects of being divorced?I’m in a cycling club, mostly male dominated, the tradition has been a 9.00am start for most of the guys due to family commitments. In the winter it can be problematic due to the early morning cold. A bunch of the divorced guys started meeting at 11.30, much more civilised. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/05/26 08:57 AM |
| 13 | Something I Will Not Miss. How About You?Paying for absolutely everything, her paying for nothing and expecting me to pay. I’m out, it’s a game of waiting now for the legals to be sorted. | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/05/26 05:24 PM |
| 1 | Paternity Fraud is Serious and Widespread, But Incidents May Go Unpunished - SaveI agree with everything you’ve said but as a wronged father (and I’m one myself) don’t expect justice of any kind, moral or financial. I will make my son aware of the situation in good time, for his mother on the other hand there will be no price to pay or remorse. | /r/MensRights | 29/01/26 03:03 PM |
| 1 | Paternity Fraud is Serious and Widespread, But Incidents May Go Unpunished - SaveThe interests of the child are prioritised over the wronged father. Suck it up, accept you have been deeply betrayed and move on with your life as best you can. For those seeking recourse, little can be done in most countries or states. The only punishment for the woman is reputational, even the impact of that is questionable as they seem to shrug it off. | /r/MensRights | 29/01/26 11:39 AM |
| 2 | Pull Trigger Soon, Or After Attempting Counseling and Christmas / New Year?Yes it’s now too late for me too. Not that she’s offered. Her BS and the contempt she has shown me has totally ruined any hope of a reconciliation. | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/11/25 12:46 PM |
| 3 | Pull Trigger Soon, Or After Attempting Counseling and Christmas / New Year?Pastor is right, needs to be done properly and not in haste. Get counselling definitely, you need to give it every chance. The impact on the family is horrendous, I would have loved to go to therapy but wife refused many requests. | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/11/25 06:49 AM |
| 1 | Divorce & HolidaysPersonally I’d wait till January, meet lawyers, mentally prepare, get ready for a mid January drop of the D bomb. Who knows you might have a great Christmas with her 😬 I will say one thing, you say she’s doing the right things on paper. Mine didn’t give a shit and denied absolutely everything, wouldn’t attend counselling either, there’s something positive there to in your marriage be reflected upon | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/11/25 09:44 PM |
| 1 | A reflection from "ELONAIRES"There’s element in this relevant to us all. | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/10/25 09:35 PM |
| 3 | Confirmation She Was a NagMine had this saying “I’ll let you get me” or I’ll let you do” the dishes, collect the kids or whatever her whim was. Very demeaning. One day I asked what was with the “I’ll let you” BS, to be fair to her that was the end of it. But not after the silent treatment for a week or so. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/03/25 03:20 PM |
| 2 | Who is she?Good luck Op, seems like you’re doing the right thing. | /r/Divorce_Men | 03/02/25 12:34 AM |
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