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Redstonefreedom Archive

View 0 posts and 47 comments by Redstonefreedom on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

I simply disagree with how much you seem to think the human decision-making process is logical, conscious, and fully-aware. I guess that's where we guess differently.
/r/RedPillWomen26/06/24 12:02 PM
2

I think as the least-intuitive partial answer, not "fetishizing" honesty, so to speak. Mild rejoicing, OK, but not really basing my "how good am I doing" on the merits of honesty as a sinful thing. Rather, "how good am I doing" on the merits on how open & honest of communication & synchronization am I realizing here? I think that helps. It at least makes it fun, or motivating, to realize you're not playing a zero-sum game, but actually a productive one. Also I think honesty should be more viewed…
/r/RedPillWomen26/06/24 09:44 AM
3

You also have the opportunity to spin that into a positive (for yourself and to abide by the maxim), to be clear -- "I like to contribute on more of the chores since I work less." It also is a perfectly rationale transformation of internal narrative to make. You take what is ultimately a spontaneous desire to contribute, & ideal of fairness, & frame it more accurately as a collaborative, & not antagonistic/negotiatory, dynamic of the relationship.
/r/RedPillWomen26/06/24 09:04 AM
2

"In this case, I'm almost certain his ex wasn't fine with it" I would implore you to not do exactly what this thread has cautioned against -- overly confident assertion of knowing the specific cause of a specific situation, of which you actually have absolutely no first-hand experience over. In fact, in this run of telephone, it's now third-hand for you since it is second-hand for OP. Now, sure, don't take what she said at face value. That's a prudent thing to do. But even worse would be making …
/r/RedPillWomen26/06/24 08:53 AM
2

I think your creative interpretation of the hairdresser's study unfortunately is untenable. It then begs the question -- why are they only trying to make hot women hotter, and not their other, uglier clients? The only reason I could think of would be "because they tend to think for the uglier clients that there's no hope in putting any effort in", which, though hilarious, I think is too absurd to take seriously. Maybe you have a different take or different assessment of my own, though!
/r/RedPillWomen26/06/24 08:38 AM
1

❤️
/r/RedPillWomen26/06/24 08:31 AM
2

Haha I really do adore your apparent perspective -- genuine enthusiasm, kindness, a hearty helping of nuance in a birds-eye tour, and a judicious re-framing of Terra Firma priorities. Anyways. As for some interesting-but-probably-unimportant nuance. I'm a couple decades out from an unwavering commitment to radical honesty in all my interpersonal relationships. A deep commitment, too -- no false representations, glaring omissions, obviously no cheating. (To be clear that I'm not an idiot, I don't…
/r/RedPillWomen26/06/24 08:29 AM
2

Haha no it's not a bad word at all! I wasn't criticizing rather, chewing on it myself. I think a good way to avoid having to do the gymnastics would be something like saying ".... covert (unintentional or otherwise)" and the conversation would handle the kind of superposition it needs to without excessive verbosity. I quite appreciate your use of the word actually.
/r/RedPillWomen26/06/24 07:41 AM
4

strongly suggested she move on Yea this is the critical flaw. imo advice should never give hard suggestions like that. It's arrogant to assume you know the life of the person living it better than that very person. It's certainly bad advice but it's impossible as always to know how intentional the friend is as she gives it. She should consider what life she wants to live, see & weigh the inherent tradeoff between money now / quality-time later that this relationship carries, and decide softly. M…
/r/RedPillWomen26/06/24 05:14 AM
2

I guess succinctly, a good general piece of advice would be this: If you want advice, you need to find people who are good (even transparent & vocal about) at firewalling their biases when giving advice. That includes: 1: selfish intent, conscious or otherwise 2: specific personal biases 3: generic cognitive biases (e.g. what you've brought up in this thread) These people can be a diamond in the rough so it's worth expending the effort to hold onto them once you've found them.
/r/RedPillWomen26/06/24 04:59 AM
3

You've hit the nail on the head. Even if you find people who are more successful & even more emotionally intelligent than you are, they just can't even be brought up to speed efficiently to understand all the context. And the tone -- we are rarely skilled at reiterating tone. A truly good advisor will know this, and qualify their advice with: "but of course you know better than I do, so ultimately you need to be the one to decide. But at least those are my thoughts to think about. It could be X,…
/r/RedPillWomen26/06/24 04:52 AM
2

One more note on your comment is on the hairdresser thing -- I don't like the word "covert", here, as I think it confuses the phenomenon from what it's truly like. I think with how little we tend to examine our own feelings, resentment can easily form from insecurity ("this person makes me feel insecure therefore they're trying to do so"), and then that resentment manifests in anti-social behavior. I really AM curious how much conscious intention is inherent in those statistics. I know it's ulti…
/r/RedPillWomen26/06/24 04:47 AM
3

All humans can, and do, a lot of unconscious (& likely evolutionarily evolved & promoted) behaviors which are anti-social, selfish, and ultimately net-negative for their communities. I find our language is pretty limited for talking about these phenomena sensibly. Even just the word "manipulation" is tricky. It requires intent. But I've seen some extended family members who are not at all introspective, in fact they have significant mental disabilities, and they still are capable of highly manip…
/r/RedPillWomen26/06/24 04:40 AM
1

Jesus Christ, what a loser of a guy.
/r/RedPillWomen13/02/24 11:44 AM
3

Lmao yea, you're on the money about the potency of the gentleman thing. No idea why it's so potent but it is.
/r/RedPillWomen22/09/23 05:11 PM
-3

He didn't "straight to her face" say "I am testing how much disrespect you'll tolerate"; if you choose to deliberately misconstrue someone's words whatever your reason may be, don't be surprised when their actions don't line up with your predictions. If you conflate social play with disrespect, you'll never understand billions of friendships that are mutually understood by billions of friends.
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/23 04:37 AM
0

I feel like you're reading too much into it due to, as you acknowledged, previous negative experience. My family dynamic is such that we are always messing with each other (all women FYI), and I have never experienced passive aggression from my family. (In fact, I really didn't understand it nor how to deal with it the first relationship I had) Nor would I say it comes from a place of insecurity for anyone; they all aren't terribly secure but not in a masked kind of way, but rather just a transp…
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/23 04:31 AM
11

As a guy, compliment him regularly and after a while he'll compliment back, probably. I've had plenty of behavioral changes because a girlfriend does something nice and I'm like "well gee, that's really swell" and wanting to be swell too, myself.
/r/RedPillWomen25/08/23 10:33 AM
2

As a guy, I had to give up video games years ago. Depends on your personality type, but they just CONSUME your time if you have a tendency to deep dive. I once had this dream that I'd be able to automatically track & audit my time closely enough to allow me to "play" video games without becoming obsessed, but I've since given up.
/r/RedPillWomen24/08/23 06:40 PM
0

Oh my god this is so incisive. Kudos for opening my mind.
/r/RedPillWomen19/04/23 09:23 PM
1

I think it’s fine to stalk social media now while you can’t pick up on queues otherwise and are quickly looking for more info to help learn about how people act & are, but don’t make it an obsession. And don’t invade privacy. Once you do you’ll start seeing ghosts and anyways create a problem. (If the “it’s unethical” argument doesn’t work for you, there’s a selfish one)
/r/RedPillWomen18/04/23 10:20 PM
1

I would suggest you keep an open mind about that belief. It’s a damn shame when such prejudices keep us from genuine, platonic human connection. When I was a kid I used to have mostly female friends and when puberty muddied the pot of subtext on all sides, even though I knew how to keep it in my pants from early on, it’s like hybrid gender relationships just became impossible. And I definitely lamented the feminine perspective from friends. Just consider the fact that your age group is just bare…
/r/RedPillWomen18/04/23 10:17 PM
4

Yea Jesus Christ that guy is a loser. Stay the fuck away. But a guy having genuine & close relationships with girls isn’t correlated with this kind of behavior. In fact I’d say it’s anti correlated. Instead, they tend to be superficial “back burner”-esque relationships, and those are obviously indicative of persona non grata.
/r/RedPillWomen18/04/23 10:09 PM
6

To give clarity, I mean that if a guy friend of mine were to post something like that, and we were hanging out, and I saw it, I’d say “dude wtf? Why would you post that on social media? So fucking weird, man.” and depending on his reaction would drop him as a friend if he doesn’t see how lacking in dignity it is. “Like come on dude, you’re going to use tactics that a high schooler would feel weird with?” Friends with the opposite sex is 100x less of a red flag than that social media behavior. It…
/r/RedPillWomen18/04/23 10:01 PM
3

No, it’s definitely ick, as a self-respecting guy. I’m hesitant to even air my “adventures” to friends, let alone on social media. IMO such talk trivializes otherwise sincere romantic connection. It’s childish & immature. You’re young and should take the time you have to find someone who is appreciably mature. Date more actively and you’ll more quickly be able to “pick out the ick” as you gain more experience; I’m sure there are other signs in his behavior that correspond to him being that kind …
/r/RedPillWomen18/04/23 09:56 PM
1

I'm not an anti-/feminist, and I'm actually a guy. But I have to say, I've been subbed here since I started dating as an adult, and the impact it's had on my relationships is huge. The transparency and optimistic honesty here is so valuable for being able to treat women with respect & kindness & support. It has had such a healthy boost in the harmony & reciprocality I've since experienced in all my relationships. RedPill is a cesspool of machiavellianism, as is feminism, but this community gives…
/r/RedPillWomen26/03/23 07:13 PM
3

If he's asking you to give up your earning power in order to support his, you are entitled to 50% of the power in those spending decisions. There's no need that you should give up your financial independence just because you'll be taking care of the "home" part of the partnership. I would get all of this in a prenup so there is no ambiguity. Now, if you simply want to be able to work and earn your own money for the sense of fulfillment it often provides, and it's a hard-need for you, communicate…
/r/RedPillWomen10/02/22 06:51 AM
7

You’re free to do as you’d like & should be empowered to do so, but be careful with “which is not and they are hurting themselves”. This kind of arrogance of being right is the same one that leads them to pressure you against not doing the things you want to do. You aren’t any more right than they are, and that kind of “my way is better than yours” attitude will run you into issues, especially as you seek to gain acceptance for your way as the minority.
/r/RedPillWomen19/09/20 12:57 AM
5

History was literally defined by men who, out of intense discomfort for where they are, took on tremendous risk just to seek adventure & self-betterment.... that's not to say that women don't want those same things too, but it's to say that your perspective is just pure speculation which you've convinced yourself is based on something substantive.
/r/RedPillWomen11/08/20 12:54 AM
1

Ah, when you said “They sleep around and don’t think twice about it”, that phrase (sleeping around), and maybe I’m wrong, implies cheating. It especially seemed like that since we (in this thread) were talking about “masturbation & its effects on your relationship”. I agree women should be able to shamelessly fulfill their sex drive... to a point. I’ll first qualify by saying that they should make sure it is less a matter of validation, because becoming addicted to external validation can lead t…
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/20 08:59 PM
20

“Men sleep around and don’t think twice about it” ... yeaaaa as a dude, definitely going to contradict you on that. Maybe some guys... but no one I am friends with would shamelessly cheat. Never heard it myself, wouldn’t accept it ethically if I did.
/r/RedPillWomen25/07/20 03:23 AM
7

Yea I agree if she doesn’t want the kink, and he won’t admit he did it or does it again, then there’s no possibility for conversation, and she should walk. He obviously feels shame, but she has no way of knowing whether it is because of a harmless dynamic-kink, or a festering deep-rooted desire. Really sorry to hear about your situation BTW, I read some of your comments & it’s pretty terrible for you to have to go through. ❤️
/r/RedPillWomen24/07/20 12:06 PM
58

Alright your situation is about as fucked up as it gets, but I would say there’s a pretty big difference between a father who is actively fantasizing about his puberty-age daughter with his wife as role play, and a dude who said “mommy” during sex. The story OP shared could be a harmless & impersonal kink. But your (soon to be ex) husband is about as harmful & personal as it gets. In Spanish for example they say “mamacita”, “mamichula”, “papasito” etc. in a sexualized way very regularly, and I c…
/r/RedPillWomen24/07/20 11:56 AM
3

Perspective as a dude: just wear your confidence. Give ‘em the old Smokey eyes that say: “I know you want me and you know I know”. You don’t even have to take your clothes off, or do a dance, although if you feel like you can rock it, go for it. I’d say it’s all in the eyes. And it won’t be hard to convince yourself he finds you attractive because... well I’m sure you know that by now since he’s your boyfriend 😅
/r/RedPillWomen08/07/20 12:54 AM
7

I’m a guy. Yea, cultivate yourself. Of course! But the “play hard to get” advice is a bit childish. Having sex, even as early as on the first date, does not kill desire for me. I can tell when a woman is artificially regulating her desired actions, and it’s not attractive. Being a “free spirit”, or maybe more accurately described as having your feeling in harmony with your actions (waiting if you want to wait, throwing yourself at the guy if you want to throw yourself at the guy) is attractive. …
/r/RedPillWomen08/06/20 09:41 PM
17

As a guy who has read/watched a lot of TRP but prefers this community, I would understand her hesitation. Honestly, TRP can be a really toxic perspective. There’s a lot of truth there but it’s just drowned in spite at times, depending where & when. I remember the feeling of wanting to look away, in the aim of self-preservation in the sense that: “ugh I get it, but I don’t want to see the world through this lens.” Especially not all the time. And it’s not something you can just turn off. If you c…
/r/RedPillWomen24/05/20 02:15 PM
3

Amazing quote, past-me could’ve used that several years ago.
/r/RedPillWomen10/05/20 11:09 PM
6

This is an aphorism that always bugs me when it gets bandied about, that “you shouldn’t care what other people think about you”, as if it frees you from the shackles of society with a single quip. I agree with you, it is an inextricable part of our social existence, how others view us. These phrasings are always so empty because they lack nuance, and I think people as well are susceptible to wavering between arguing for and against the dichotomies, because these abstract discussions are void of …
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/20 07:13 PM
4

My take on this as a guy... If you’re worried the guy will send the photos around, the fact he’d do that should be your main worry. That’s actually a great internal signal you’re with the wrong guy! As a software developer, sending around nude photos securely is pretty difficult. Not impossible if you’re using e2e encryption, but if it starts to sync around like with something like iCloud... yes, harder to keep a handle on it. But there are so many nude photos out there, unless you’re a celeb, y…
/r/RedPillWomen09/05/20 06:55 PM
1

First off, if that’s an exact quote, that’s a really disrespectful & immature thing to say to your loved one. If it were patently false (eg you had told him you were only with one other guy), then it would be playful facetiousness, but if that’s not the case, it’s just an inconsiderate (not necessarily intentionally malicious, but still) jab at a possible insecurity. Not OK. With that said, he may be insecure himself and is managing that insecurity irresponsibly/immaturely. I’ve been cheated on …
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/20 03:23 AM
1

That scene ends perfectly with the serial killer (not the main character) quote... I can’t tell if the guys realize they’re likewise dehumanizing women in the same way as the quote that Patrick Bateman brings up, or they fail to catch the irony, but the uneasy look shared is so well framed.
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/20 02:44 AM
1

As a guy, no, I’ve never said anything of that sort. Well, I’ve said someone looks tired, but I think that was a weird outlier for you to include anyways. That’s really not “critical”, it’s just commenting on how someone appears in terms of their well being. I feel like this is very normal, no? When I’ve missed some sleep, I constantly get badgered for looking tired the next day. But besides that, no, I don’t myself and have never seen any friend of mine say anything so uncalled for. You’re surr…
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/20 01:03 AM
2

I don’t mean to be callous, but your insecurity is the only worrying sign from what you have shared. For one, how long has he known this best friend? I imagine maybe a decade at least. Would you really consider it a failure on your part to build a relationship because his old friendship is more important than a four-month old relationship? And also, how do you know he wasn’t saying “this new girlfriend I have is pretty great, I’m very happy with her” to his friend when he went to visit? I doubt …
/r/RedPillWomen07/11/19 02:42 AM
3

Yes, I think your takeaway is the clearest one to have -- that you should ask for help more, directly. To be clear, it sounds like you have a very healthy relationship as-is, but that you perhaps would like to change the dynamic a bit. I am in a similar way where I like to take care of my partner the more she takes care of me, and that includes when she asks for help. I think the difference between the masculine & feminine instinct for nurturing comes down to being direct; both sides have a nurt…
/r/RedPillWomen24/08/19 03:54 PM
2

I think there’s a few things that have been missed for consideration. For one, as much as you are vetting him, if he is a self-respecting guy, he is also vetting you. Especially if you guys are discussing marriage. If you’ve gotten this far, your drive for self-sufficiency & education is probably a huge component on why he liked & respects you. Another factor is that your parents probably have a distorted view on how to weigh actions of a partner, since the social contract has changed so much ov…
/r/RedPillWomen24/08/19 02:11 PM
1

Hahaha, that will win the ladies over, just start flashing them your pecker! Truly a prodigal PUA in the making.
/r/TheRedPill26/04/17 10:07 PM
1

You're an immature idiot. You don't deserve to attract women because you have an incredibly unattractive personality. They themselves have no idea what it is, and the dumb females obviously dont. This is arrogant & pretentious. Arrogance is a pathetic substitute for confidence. If I were a woman, I wouldn't care if you looked like Neil Caffrey -- if you talked like this, I'd find the closest cab and get the hell away.
/r/TheRedPill26/04/17 05:58 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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