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Sagecerulli Archive

View 0 posts and 33 comments by Sagecerulli on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

I'm so glad! Wishing you the best of luck
/r/ExRedPill18/04/25 02:34 AM
1

Maybe check out these guys? Life After Hate (The website is trying to reach people who are more extreme than you are describing ... but the same principles may apply). Also remember that we are tiny little humans who were meant to live in small communities living in a vast technological world that's full of confusing information designed to play on our deepest fears and desires. It can happen to anyone.
/r/ExRedPill15/04/25 03:24 AM
2

Also tbh, your empathetic comments on this sub and your really nuanced, self-aware question suggest to me anyone would be lucky to date you . . . the most important thing is that you keep those things alive! I hope that therapy helps, and if you do have OCD (or even if you don't) I've foudn the r/OCDRecovery subreddit helpful.
/r/ExRedPill15/04/25 03:20 AM
2

First, I'm so sorry, breakups are rough. Second, take your time to mourn & heal. Lean on friends and family, if you feel safe + comfortable doing so, and if you're up for it (once you've gotten some emotional distance), maybe reflect back on the relationship, what worked well, what you've learned about yourself, etc. When I was in middle school I had a pretty heartbreaking friendship breakup, and my mom told me: "this is just like breaking up with a romantic partner. You can feel sad and also lo…
/r/ExRedPill15/04/25 03:16 AM
1

That sounds really rough, and I'm so sorry. *As a woman* I'll say that looks do somewhat matter ... but at least for me, I usually start seeing people I'm attracted to as beautiful/attractive after I have an emotional connection with them. And the looks that matter aren't always (or ever) 6-pack abs; they can be other things -- like gentle eyes, or the way that a person's face lights up when they are excited. Maybe this makes me demisexual & I'm a minority, but I think a lot of women are less im…
/r/ExRedPill15/04/25 02:52 AM
1

I also think that Romance isn't the genre to look at for realistic representations of relationships (a lot of women read romance, but a lot of women hate it. There's a lot of different analysis about what drives these tropes, but it's not all just this is what women perceive as romantic). One "romance" book/movie to try might be It Ends with Us by Colleen Hoover. It does portray a doting romantic relationship, but more importantly problematizes all of the questionable tropes of the romance genre…
/r/ExRedPill15/04/25 02:42 AM
1

Hmmmm just thought I'd point out that just because "woman believe that about wolves" doesn't mean it's true . . . actually, most women know close to nothing about wolves . . . And just because the BBC once said a thing in a documentary doesn't mean it's true. Most topics of animal behavior are contested among experts (who are themselves subject to bias and egotism) ... and documentaries often just show the perspectives of a few experts. Also, your entire point about wolf hunting is completely no…
/r/ExRedPill01/02/25 08:32 PM
3

Remember that the more people hear something repeated, the more likely they are to begin believing it. (This is basically how propaganda works). So get off those pages as fast as you can.
/r/ExRedPill22/01/25 12:58 AM
1

I'm in a monogamous relationship, but I've never really been able to understand this fear. Where does it come from? What really are you afraid of? What would be so awful if she was unfaithful? I ask not because people should be unfaithful, but because I think sometimes the way that men view this issue makes it seem like they think of women as property. Or like pets that will run away the second the leash comes off. Which is I think how RedPill works -- it essentially tells you that your woman ca…
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 10:38 AM
1

So I read that post and I don't really think that's her accepting that she "settled" for her husband -- it seems more like a mid-life crisis. Or maybe a deeper mental health issue. I think people of all sexes and genders can just be terrible. But remember that when you see these things, you're fitting them into a narrative the RedPill has given you. These are tiny, tiny data points that strung together probably mean nothing, but behind them you see this big RedPill mural and you can't help but f…
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 10:30 AM
1

If you want to read like hard-core feminist thought, then Virginia Wolfe, Simone de Bouvoir, and Sylvia Plath. If you want YouTube videos, I love Contrapoints. Obviously her video on incels is good, but I think her videos on Shame and Twilight also have important things to say. If you want fantasy, Lord of the Rings. Tolkien's male characters have a beautiful and frankly quite attractive masculinity thats not celebrated enough today. I'd recommend the books over the movies, even though they can …
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 10:23 AM
1

Gah, that sounds really hard. I'm sorry. I'm also very short and in middle school my "friends" would try to pick me up. I hated it. But I am a woman, so it's less bad dating wise. Personally, I never understood the aversion to dating shorter men. I'd date a shorter man -- but I've yet to find a man shorter than me, so that doesn't count for much :) But about attractiveness . . . different women experience this differently. And yes, 'conventional attractiveness' can matter. But I'm not sure it ma…
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 10:04 AM
1

I feel like social groups are the way to go. I am *a woman* and can understand being a little put off by an approach on the street. Some of my friends have tried dating apps, with very limited success, and the whole thing feels really dehumanizing. The happiest couples I know are the ones who met over shared interests -- because then you can build up from a friendship. My bf and I met playing D&D. My grandmother met her husband when they were both grading the SATs (don't ask lol). My cousin met …
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 09:50 AM
1

TBH my bf was in a similar situation . . . and now we've been together for almost two years, and its amazing! I wouldn't want him to change. I love that he's friends with other women bc he's very used to a more female communication style, which has helped our relationship. I'm a little mixed on if many women actually care that much about muscles. To me it seems like more of a status thing between men, but I'm not sure. To his credit, my bf has done a lot to become more comfortable talking to peo…
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 09:43 AM
1

Hmmmm sounds like these weren't the most healthy relationships? You're right about what good communication would look like. But also depends on the backgrounds of the women. Have they ever been taught that its ok to speak directly to their needs? Not all people are. Also, have they tried the direct communication, and it didn't work? Sometimes when people feel they're not being heard with words, they'll try to make an emotional impact with their actions.
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 09:29 AM
1

I'd be wary of claims of things being "biologically driven." I think you're using the term as in "genetically driven" and thus immutable. Things can be "biologically driven" without being immutable. Like the average U.S. homicide rate used to be much higher, and that was probably in part due to biologically driven emotions (anger, grief, etc.) that led people to violence. But today many people still have those emotions and aren't led to violence. As for whether women's behavior is "biological" .…
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 09:26 AM
1

I'd watch Contrapoints' video on Incels (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fD2briZ6fB0), and her videos on Envy (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aPhrTOg1RUk) and Twilight (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bqloPw5wp48&t=5292s). They are fun and entertaining but also make some very good points. Also check out the YouTube channel Cinematherapy -- its just a great channel, and also does a lot of unpacking of relationships. Spend more time outside the internet interacting with real people, and notice wh…
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 09:03 AM
1

What social groups are you hanging around? In my experience, women are averse to feeling used. And the 'just trying to get laid' vibe can feel a lot like getting used.
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 08:41 AM
1

Just a note on divorce rates -- women couldn't hold a credit card in their own name in the U.S. before 1970. So 55 years ago. So today's 70 year olds came of age in a culture where women had little financial independence, in households where their mothers had little financial independence. This alone definitely changes norms around marriage. Early in her life my great-grandmother was in a really abusive relationship and tried to leave, but it was basically impossible because she had no independe…
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 08:39 AM
2

I think this comparison is made really well in the Cinematherapy video on "Megamind," if anyone wants to check it out: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OjpxlBRbhXs
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 08:30 AM
1

Ok this is so interesting because it brings up that question of what is "traditional." I study ancient history (among other things), and frankly I see . . . not much of a through line? Like you mention flowers as "traditionally feminine stuff," but in literally the oldest written book in the English language (Beowulf), the very masculine hero is constantly called "a flower of manhood." Similarly the Monarch Butterfly was named after the King of England, and he didn't seem to feel emasculated by …
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 08:24 AM
1

It might be true that "most men are going to emulate him" -- but you don't have to be that man. You might be surprised what the influence of just one dissident can do. And frankly, it would probably make you more appealing. How do you know that all of these women find him attractive? Have they told you so in private, or just giggled together in the halls? Often talking about attractive boys/discussing crushes is a bonding activity for girls. It can have as much to do with their relationships to …
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 08:14 AM
1

Also a lot of hypergamy theory seems to over-correct on mate choice (counter to older evolutionary theory, which just kind of . . . forgot . . . that females have initiative?) Even if historically females did mate disproportionately with higher class/status males, this doesn't necessarily reflect "innate" female desire. First, because conquering armies didn't exactly ask permission before pillaging and r*ping cities or taking women as sex-slaves (naturally, higher-ranking men in the armies would…
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 07:35 AM
2

There's actually a pretty good explanation for this further down ... I'll copy and paste it here (thanks u/RedPillDetox ). ALSO -- there's a reason that statistics is jokingly called "lying with numbers." One statistic without context proves nothing. "Because twice as many women don't reproduce for every man, simply put. There was a neolithic Y chromossome bottleneck which TRP uses and abuses to try to prove hypergamy is a natural phenomenon but this has been debunked: https://news.stanford.edu/…
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 07:16 AM
1

What's the red-pill definition of hypergamy? I'm kind of confused . . .
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 07:00 AM
1

So . . . should we go all Genghis Khan and decide that "the greatest happiness is to scatter your enemy, to drive him before you, to see his cities reduced to ashes, to see those who love him shrouded in tears, and to gather into your bosom his wives and daughters" ? Or should we remember that "Those who are not looking for happiness are the most likely to find it, because those who are searching forget that the surest way to be happy is to seek happiness for others"? Both quotes from alpha male…
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 06:57 AM
1

Ok, so, biology student here. First, there's actually not an "alpha" in every single animal, or even all mammals. Mammals like polar bears tend to be solitary, only interacting to mate (and in the case of a female, to raise her cubs). Same with Komodo dragons, pelagic fish, and even Orangutans (which are much more closely related to humans than fish). Second (and I've read conflicting things about this), some early studies proving the existence of "alpha wolves" for example, were very faulty. Ma…
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 06:57 AM
1

Also, I should probably say that when I met my current boyfriend (we're coming up on two years!) he was pretty close to red-pilled. He wanted a relationship so badly. He thought about status all the time. He'd read so much advice on how to be attractive (wear red, walk slowly -- I'm pretty sure this is false, btw), how to "pick" a girlfriend using a spreadsheet and math calculations (RED FLAG! BEING TREATED LIKE PROPERTY! RED FLAG!), etc. A lot of evopsych stuff. Over the course of our friendshi…
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 06:03 AM
1

I really appreciate your thoughtful comment -- AND I have to disagree with some of it. As I think, as is pretty obvious from Worried-Lychee4907's comment above, women actually are affected by the red-pill. It effects our dating pool, and the way men treat us ... and eventually it starts to effect our vision of ourselves. And frankly, I think it makes women less trusting of men, and thus less likely to initiate a relationship. I think there's also an important piece of "womanhood" and women's dat…
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 06:02 AM
1

Gah, dating as an older woman sounds horrible. Hang in there tho -- my grandmother got remarried in her seventies after 3 children, a divorce, and another 10 - year relationship. And I'm not sure I've ever seen two people love each other the way she and her husband loved each other. Sadly she's passed away now, but I still hold onto that memory (and now I have three grandfathers!) "Losing value" -- feh. Some of our most meaningful relationships can come later in life.
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 04:04 AM
1

Also lmao, I don't think many women today dream of being "wifed up." The women who come on podcasts to rate male attractiveness aren't exactly a representative sample . . . nor, it seems, would they actually be good girlfriends.
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 03:55 AM
1

I think the real takeaway here is that more than 80% of women are not on dating apps. And those that are often aren't looking for real relationships -- they're either looking to "meet people" or goofing off with the friends who set up their profile.
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 03:51 AM
1

If you want to understand "female nature" (which I think is a good goal), I think you'd have more luck with books written by women -- books like Jane Eyre ("Do you think I am an automaton? -- a machine without feelings? . . . I am not talking to you now through the medium of custom, conventionalities, nor even of mortal flesh: it is my spirit that addresses your spirit!"), anything by Ursula K. Le Guin, George Elliot, Yaa Gyasi, Octavia Butler, Audre Lord ("how the days went/while you were bloom…
/r/ExRedPill21/01/25 03:45 AM
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