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Shoddy-Cherry-490 Archive

View 0 posts and 284 comments by Shoddy-Cherry-490 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

So I guess this thread is how you get all the prude pilled people to self-identify!
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 01:20 PM
1

I am not sure how much men perpetuate it even intentionally vs it just being instincts taking over.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 04:18 PM
4

Sex can definitely be a curse for men. We are so preoccupied with getting laid, it must be hard for those who really have a hard time connecting with women and thus might realize that sex is just one mode of connecting!
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 04:16 PM
1

Do you find that kind of man harder to come by nowadays? Single income households are kind of a thing of the past especially in high-cost of living cities.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/26 10:43 PM
3

Let me clarify then, while you are able to live comfortably with your own income & assets, you'd like to level up with a long term boyfriend or husband?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/26 08:08 PM
7

Why do you need a man to provide? I am not against traditional gender roles btw, but the reality has shifted significantly in recent years, has it not?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/26 07:37 PM
8

Why is that a matter of incompatibility?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/26 07:11 PM
6

Manage your expectations and pick better men.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/26 08:28 PM
10

This is a good point. While OP’s points are well made, they really paint casual sex as this monster thrusted upon women by the much derided patriarchy. In fact, sex, including the more casual variety, is supposed to be fun for everyone. It’s not supposed to be perfect. It’s not supposed to be like porn and it’s definitely also not this sanctified thing that the church will have you believe it is.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/26 05:59 PM
2

A lot less time, effort and money goes into getting laid when you are in a relationship like an order of magnitude at least.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/26 05:51 PM
–

What makes you think that?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/26 06:29 PM
9

Is that so? What country is this?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/26 04:49 AM
14

What Orwellian novel are you reading? I have never met a single man or woman who opined about or much less tried to influence my choice in women that I date or hook up with. But i admit I am curious about this outlandish, dystopian world. Where is this happening? Can you invite me to that party please because I find it hard to believe until I actually see it!
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/26 04:10 AM
–

I hope you have heard of the age of enlightenment, humanism, the call for "liberty, equality and fraternity" and all the many other aspects that form the foundations of modern western secular society.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/26 08:13 AM
0

Not sure why you get stuck on that issue to be honest. People hold all sorts of views, explicit and implicit ones that based on context can be deeply problematic. But sometimes it’s just a form of innocent tribalism, sometimes it’s just a manifestation of unresolved victimhood, sometimes it’s just people not knowing better.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 01:43 PM
0

So I think there is a very significant difference between being genuinely antisemitic on the one hand and simply espousing a or multiple views that are arguably antisemitic on the other hand. In my opinion, the latter can be excused with ignorance on the subject matter while the former is more profoundly troubling. And no, if I rejected people who otherwise present themselves as honorable human beings simply because they hold opinions that I found problematic or ignorant, well I would have to re…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 06:50 AM
0

It would help to narrow down what you mean by "not messing up". You are obviously not talking about tripping over your shoe laces or getting the arithmetic on your tip wrong. I am sure what OP really means is not "getting filtered out" because you said the wrong thing, you didn't say something political that irked her or you said something that unbeknownst to you triggered something within her, or you prematurely escalated the conversation sexually because you misread a cue or perhaps you didn't…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 05:56 AM
3

The self righteousness and the arrogance of some of these gal here is hard to fathom. I get that OP’s take is a bit controversial and someone could reasonably question if he is just peddling tired cliches. But clearly he is hitting a raw nerve with many of them leading to one attack on his person after another. It’s quite sad really how poisoned debate culture has become with tribal loyalty.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 01:43 AM
-5

I didn't want to go as far as that and call her a liar, but coming to think of it - I think you are spot on.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 07:32 AM
-3

Yes ma’am. In fact I double checked the definition before hitting “reply”!
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 02:42 AM
-4

That’s some conceited shit to say… smh
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 02:37 AM
14

You are funny, but I don’t think that’s how it works.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 05:35 PM
14

I think you have inadvertently misrepresented the 2 ideas you base your argument on. 1) “Women’s dating advice is useless”: A woman’s perspective can be incredibly useful, but ultimately it will always be the woman’s perspective, in other words the experience of getting far too much attention from the opposite gender won’t be all that useful for men who are trying to generate more attention for themselves. Women and men ultimately deal with very different problem sets in dating. 2) “Women only g…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 05:12 PM
0

My first instinct about women who hold out for sex is usually that they are a bit prude, not necessarily that they are dishonest or exploitative. I mean you point out that you are American and yes indeed, that tracks with my experience about Americans and their often regressive attitudes about sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/26 05:00 PM
9

Yes, but realize that women who only want sex are often still cautious about broadcasting that.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 03:02 AM
2

Not really. The fact that men get sexually more aroused by the potential of a novel sexual mate (or novel sexual experience) does not mean novel sexual mates are required to get aroused.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/26 06:35 AM
1

Not sure if what you describe is a scientifically-supported phenomenon, but it sure sounds reasonable to me!
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/26 12:06 AM
4

There is the Coolidge Effect and that is really all there is to this “need for variety.” And in fact it’s not so much that “men need variety” as much as it that the prospect of sexual novelty excites men in ways that it doesn’t excite women. Whether one acts on that impulse is a different matter of course.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/26 08:56 PM
–

Thank you for summarizing our exchange. Would you care to answer any of my questions now or will you continue to put words in my mouth?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/26 03:15 AM
–

Did I say that? What percentage of the people you have dated were liars and cheats?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/26 11:50 PM
–

Do you think it’s a very typical experience?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/26 11:46 PM
–

Care to elaborate? You seem to have a particularly negative experience of life whereas most people seem to be doing just fine.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/26 05:55 PM
–

Your arguments are all in the abstract. Do you have any first or second hand experience for the claims you make?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/26 03:17 PM
2

I get it, but sometimes these opinions about sex here get so convoluted and shoehorned, it really makes you wonder if these people even know what they are talking about or whether they are just pushing some abstract narrative that has no basis in real life experience. I know Reddit is all about anonymity, but it really does make a difference if you are talking to a bitter old spinster or someone with a normal “healthy” sex life.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/26 06:16 PM
–

I have to ask: when did you last have sex?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/26 03:36 PM
6

I get the sense she doesn’t like horny men… 🤣
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/26 01:37 PM
3

Wait, was she talking about horny men?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/26 01:34 PM
1

Yes, of course I was projecting! I thought I made that pretty clear. As for the rest of your response, I feel like that was meant for other people. I will say one thing though: I always assume that most people on Reddit, certainly this subreddit, are from the US. I am from Europe myself and I am routinely amused by the puritanical attitudes about sex in this country. Feeling shame for hooking up? Getting shamed for hooking up? What year do we live in? How can people seriously be so tightly wound…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/26 11:30 PM
1

I hear you and I appreciate your earnest answer! To be honest, your answer is very revealing about one of the big gender divides relating to physical intimacy. Whereas the vast majority of men will be genuinely elated about this kind of experience, there is definitely a tendency for women to experience feelings of doubt and regret, even shame arising from such hook ups! And while your answer doesn’t insinuate anything about your encounter being anything but consensual, it doesn’t take much to en…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/26 09:54 AM
1

Why wasn’t it your “proudest moment”? It would be unusual to hear a guy say that. But why the insinuation that you regretted it afterwards?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/26 12:56 AM
1

It’s a question I ask frequently. So no worries. It seems like sex is not important for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/26 02:43 PM
1

But what is your logic?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/26 01:44 PM
1

Why? Is it a religious thing?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/26 12:33 PM
1

So first of all, I honestly try not judge. People need to do whatever makes them happy and if no sex before marriage is your thing, good for you. But objectively speaking, I just don't get this kind of "pedestalizing of sex".
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/26 04:19 AM
1

Does it bother you if people call this kind of mindset prude?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/02/26 02:45 AM
–

The biological function of men and women in reproduction is pretty clear. Women have a limited supply of egg cells and ovulate only once a month. Pregnancy is an even more enormous investment of time (9 months) and resources (the woman’s life can literally be at risk), meaning she must be extremely careful, deliberate and selective about who she has intercourse with. Whereas for men, we produce sperm in such abundant supply with such little cost to our time or resources that we ought to feel enc…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/26 02:06 PM
1

In my experience, this entire clash of genders seems pretty foreign to most of them. Most people I know have fairly mainstream traditional values, espouse more traditional gender roles and are generally more concerned about making a better life for themselves than participating in identity politics. I have met those girls who are desperate enough for a better lifestyle that they absolutely don't mind getting their boobs and asses done to attract a wealthier men. Others are more focused on advanc…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/26 03:28 AM
1

No...I am saying you are most likely not the type of woman I am talking about. The woman who tends to expect the provider in a man tends to have more traditional gender roles. But really, in America...a lot of the same women that expect the provider also want to tear down the patriarchy even where it doesn't exist. Coming to think about it...maybe your standards are also just double standards. You say you have Colombian parents. I am inclined to think that you didn't grow up there. So you talkin…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/26 02:33 AM
0

..I also forgot that the Western woman will likely shame you for just being a man, being white and really being at all! Trust me, I have met plenty of people from Latin America..it’s a veeery different culture and education, career and all that are not the issue!
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/26 12:41 AM
2

I don't think high standards are the issue at all, it's the pervasiveness of double standards that are problematic, it's the idea that the Western woman wants your career AND she wants you to pay for her lavish lifestyle, and don't you dare to think that sex is on the table unless of course and only if she wants it.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/26 07:21 PM
3

It’s very disheartening to read how little people understand issues like privacy and moral hazard. To not see the problem with a space that invites and encourages public shaming without any recourse or oversight. Some of these groups have several hundred thousand members but it’s just waved through as harmless gossip! When exactly did our society devolve into this state of tribal protectionism? Sigh… she probably means well too…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/26 04:21 AM
5

There is one generic such group for that has 11k members for the entire US. Allegedly, the women's groups collectively have 10 million members. Either is absolutely terrible, but order of magnitude the 2 are just not comparable.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 08:41 PM
2

It's lovely that you can provide a link to Wikipedia. I am from East Germany. I have relatives who were informants for the Stasi. My uncle was among the protestors that first stormed the local Stasi headquarters in the fall of 1989, his photographs were widely published at the time. Forgive me, but I am pretty sure I know a lot more about the Stasi than you do from your cursory google search. And just to save you some time, AWDTSG currently reports 10 million members across 250+ groups, easily m…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 07:36 PM
1

Sure there is a limit to what some of these numbers mean in practice, but you are missing my point a little bit. But let's play a little thought experiment with these numbers. A decently looking woman looking for casual sex, I'd expect her to generate at least a thousand matches within let's say a week (you can google these numbers...hundreds of matches per day, a thousand matches in a week is pretty typical for a girl). Men are much more open to opportunities for casual sex. Again, a quick goog…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 06:30 PM
5

And clearly you are the one who knows very little about both! So please, I'd encourage you to inform yourself first...and for the moment, let's leave it at that.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 05:54 PM
13

You gotta be kidding me. Before the New York group was taken down, it had some 200k members. Imagine your picture, your name and some very raunchy, probably most unflattering part of your dating life getting blasted to over 200k people. I am in a couple of those groups and I guarantee you it's a f'n cesspool. And you should see those threads where a woman jumps in to provide a contrary viewpoint to the manhaters... a group of hungry pitbulls has nothing on some of these scorned women. You know, …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 05:22 PM
1

I'd say those number track pretty well with my personal experience, although 1% "short term fun" seems lower than what I would expect...I live in NYC though. And just to clarify, when I quoted "5%", i was indeed referring to the percentage of women in the "short term fun" category, i.e. women solely looking for a hook up. From my experience, I would draw a pretty distinct line between "short term fun" and the other two similar categories (long term, open to short term; still figuring out). While…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 05:15 PM
9

Hahahah! Is it really a place to protect women or is it more likely a place to slander men's reputation without the accused even knowing about it never mind having any way to tell their side or dare I say defend themselves? Where I am from (East Germany) we had a different name for that. We called it the Stasi...
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 04:44 PM
0

Percentage-wise, it’s a small minority of women that explicitly go for short term fun.. maybe 5 %. And yeah true. She is probably better off with the experienced player type, assuming he’s not the type to see her only as something to masturbate into! But to your point, I think for women explicitly looking for casual sex, dating apps are incredibly convenient actually! In fact, it’s been view for some time now that dating apps work very well only 2 groups: 1) women interested in casual encounters…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 03:33 PM
0

Yes, but as a girl you are really putting yourself out there to some unwanted solicitations if you are that direct about wanting or at least being open to a hook up. Honestly, I don’t envy the woman’s role on dating apps. On the surface they appear to have a lot of options, but the filtering process is actually a ton of work and the risk of landing an experienced and manipulative player type is higher than you think!
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 03:06 PM
4

Because I have hooked up with girls who said “no hookups” on multiple occasions. I get it. Some girls actually mean that, but many others just say it to filter for the guys they might be open to hook up with!
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 03:00 PM
9

Hahaha… this is one of these internet debates not based in reality. We all know these tinder profiles that say “no hookup” and with all due respect, half of the girls that put that in their profile mean to say “no hookup unless i think you are hot!” The point is women can be just as conceded as men when it comes to dating so this whole “just be straight forward” is a bunch of BS!
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 02:30 PM
0

You underestimate the fallacy of too many options.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 02:07 PM
17

Like posting details about their date from a year ago in forums like “AWDTSG”?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 02:03 PM
2

When I talk with women in romantic situations, one question I like to ask is where they stand on the sequence of commitment and intimacy, i.e. which comes first. While commitment is a common answer, it’s not nearly as universal as you might expect - it’s about half/half really. In other words, there are plenty of women for whom physical chemistry is very important and who would therefore put that quite a bit lower on the pyramid.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 01:53 PM
2

Yeah good points.. the whole supply and demand dynamic creates a lot of misunderstandings between the sexes. For example, women only stand to benefit from being straightforward and honest as they filter through suitors (the equivalent of a highly priced, exclusive good in a market of high demand) where as men have to be very cautious in what they say and how they position themselves when pursuing a woman (the equivalent of being the best deal out there in a market of abundant supply). Yet, women…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 03:58 AM
1

That's what I thought you would say...presumably that's sex with the same partner, right? Because as we also know, casual sex pretty often is mediocre sex and mediocre sex isn't particularly desirable for women where as for men mediocre sex is typically good enough to get the job done. I know this is a bit of a tangent, but what I am getting at is that also the experience of sex is different for men and women. For men, it's just much more a baseline thing. A guy only needs to see someone hot; on…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 03:44 AM
1

What guarantees great sex?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 02:23 AM
3

I know...and believe me, men know this just as well...you know that sex with a woman isn't something you pick up in the grocery store. But then why do we all act like this isn't true. Why do men and women recede into their bubbles of where instead of talking about our needs with each other, we just point the finger at each other (e.g. misogyny and hypergamy).
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/26 08:25 PM
1

And just look at the comments. People (women) will be so quick to point out that no, sex is not as critical to survival as eating, drinking or breathing (like no shit, Sherlock!), rather than engaging in the issue at hand. It's quite unfortunate really...
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/26 07:08 PM
9

To say it’s a physical need akin to eating and drinking is clearly a mischaracterization because it invokes images of sexual starvation leading to death which are patently false. But sexuality is simply a much more basic driver/motivator/predictor for male behavior than it is for women. If you think of human behavior as an operating system optimized for the bodies we inhabit, sex is a far more dominant and basic behavioral routine for men than it is for women. So in terms of the hierarchy pyrami…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/26 05:39 PM
12

Not only do I think you are right, but I think this maybe the single most important conversation men and women need to have. I am baffled by the fact that even though we collectively all sense and know this discrepancy to be true, men and women continuously refuse to accept that this is the case: that for men, sexuality is a far more basic motivator for behavior than it is for women. I am generalizing here, but (many) men will spend unfathomable amounts of time, effort and resources and risk los…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/26 05:30 PM
-1

What exactly does “our bodies” mean?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/26 11:17 PM
1

The real problem here is that women get so hung up about men’s unwavering, ever-present desire to get laid. Every time I hear a woman complain how the guy just wants sex I think to myself “No shit Sherlock! Men are horny, lustful creatures!” The ironic thing is if men weren’t constantly pre-occupied with women (and by that I mean having sex with women), how do we imagine humans would ever couple up? Do the ladies really think that men obsess over women just so we can give away our time and money…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/26 07:00 PM
7

I have a pretty good idea what a 21 year old woman looks like. Lol
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 03:23 AM
2

Miss… I believe you dropped a handkerchief…ooooh…never mind! It’s just a dirty old Kleenex with a used condom. Yikes! I’ll just toss it in the trash.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/26 04:38 PM
7

Some time ago, I watched a survey in which women were asked what they disliked the most about dating men and one of the most common responses what that men lead on women, that men are not honest about their intentions. My hypothesis is that the dynamics of dating (abundance of choice for women, scarcity for men) make for a scenario in which women communicate specifically for the purpose of filtering out potential partners whereas men communicate with the aim of closing the deal!
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/26 02:36 AM
17

The relative cost & benefits of communication transparency, specifically with regard to dating intentions, value projection and perceived opportunity costs!
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/26 12:28 AM
7

I think he is getting an accredited certificate probably from DeVry University.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/26 12:41 AM
3

Last time I checked the Catholic Church, “home” to 1.4 billion souls, still does not recognize divorce and I am pretty sure they aren’t to chipper about pre-marital sex either.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/12/25 04:44 PM
2

I mean OP could also just watch some porn and stroke one out. That should help with this blue ball rage!
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/25 01:43 AM
2

I have found that this is a cultural issue, i.e. an American issue. When I worked in Europe, my colleagues and I would openly talk about what kind of money we were all being paid and even if our benefits were consistent. Then I came to America and I got the sense that this was not only discouraged by some employers, employees often seemed to think that there was some kind of advantage in not having your peers know how much you made.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/12/25 03:06 PM
1

Bleaching your eyebrows…That sounds wild. Interestingly, I think eyebrows might be one of those things that women are a lot more attuned to than men, i.e. men don’t notice and don’t really care. Having said that even a girl wearing sweatpants, an oversize hoodie and with a baseball hat might exude sex appeal. A cute face even without make up might do it and that is indeed hard to hide. Either way sex sells and in today‘s hyper competitive attention economy, it‘s not going to get any easier in th…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/25 09:04 PM
1

This is entirely understandable, but begs some questions. Men’s sex drive is primarily visual, so it follows to reason that your appearance, specifically the way you present yourself in the world should have a measurable impact on the amount of attention you receive. Do you concern yourself with your appearance in terms of downplaying your natural attractiveness to men?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/25 07:24 PM
2

It sounds to me what this awkwardly worded post is really trying to say is that you should utilize the freedom you have as a young person to experiment sexually and try out different things rather than being preoccupied with finding your life partner/being a good partner to someone else. And I think that would actually be sage advice not even because being sexually experienced is a reasonable life goal, but because in today’s world everything just takes a bit, especially that “finding your place…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/25 06:37 PM
1

You know, it's just sex...
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/25 05:13 PM
3

It's a limited set of categories for sure and as far as I understand, actually getting hit up for a date or number on the street or in a grocery store is a fairly rare occurrence. It does happen though and many women don't mind.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/25 07:41 PM
12

So you may not personally like being approached in public, but your information here is just wrong. Public venues like bars & clubs have been places to make romantic connections for decades and really in large part, it's understood that the existence of those places also serves that purpose. Having said that, you are not wrong that people make romantic connections in other ways, but this is a case of both things can be true, right? <image>
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/25 07:10 PM
4

Same. If not for posts like this, I wouldn’t be aware that such content actually exists.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/25 01:50 AM
-1

Exactly my thoughts. But I guess it's a good thing making it easier for those of us who treat women like actual human beings.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/25 04:29 AM
6

You should spend a week in Copenhagen. It seems like every playground I (father of a toddler based in the US) went to, dads were in 2/3 majority!
/r/PurplePillDebate23/09/25 04:57 PM
2

Exactly! Those who get hundreds or thousands of potential matches have to filter aggressively while those who get a handful of matches have to navigate those filters carefully!
/r/PurplePillDebate17/09/25 05:47 AM
1

I guess I am a likable person… other than that, you really gotta ask them.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/25 07:44 PM
1

Are you asking me specifically? If you are, I would probably just refer you to the women I have been with, not that I would cause that’s a bit weird. 🤣
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/25 06:47 PM
1

I don’t actually see the question in your comment. Obviously both men and women have a choice in who they sleep with.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/25 05:44 PM
1

Casual sex can be a lot of different things, so instead of setting up a false dichotomy, we should clarify that we are referring to sex outside of a committed, long term relationship. There are plenty of good reasons why casual sex can be beneficial for both men and women: 1) Novelty is fun and exciting: Meeting a person for the first time can be quite exciting and so is getting intimate with them. While novelty might be a bigger thing for men psychologically, I think for women it can be just as…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/09/25 01:01 PM
2

At the end of the day all laws and social conventions are consensus-based. If society was fine with 15 year olds being considered adults, then we wouldn't have this conversation. Having said that, of course there is a line, beyond which things get murky very fast, which is probably why nowadays, we have a more substantial age buffer. A 14 year old girl was considered ripe and ready for marriage a few hundred years ago. It's unthinkable to 99% of us nowadays. I think 18 is a perfectly acceptable …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 03:52 PM
7

Precisely! Keep in mind that OKCupid, at least back in 2009, wasn’t an “app” like tinder at all where you would have to match with someone before being able to initiate a conversation. In fact, it was a web-based portal, where you could filter for people in your area and then essentially reach out to them by what we now call “sliding into their DMs”! Swiping and matching didn’t become a thing until 2012/13 when tinder was launched. So really OP needs to do a much better job than posting stuff th…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/09/25 03:13 AM
1

People engage in all sorts of risky behavior and at the end of the day that seems like a very personal choice. And don’t get me wrong. I am not endorsing such behavior. But I think here you are kind of missing the point. The male sex drive is very primal and doesn’t require any mental gymnastics to be activated. And once aroused, many men, normal men to be frank, will find it hard to resist temptation simply because it’s in our nature to be ready for the kill. The irony is that the one thing tha…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/25 01:10 AM
0

Opportunity and the fact that there are things you can’t get within a relationship. Sexual novelty, for example, is a big thing for men. Getting that within the confines of a relationship is very difficult to impossible.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 07:58 PM
13

People on this subreddit often really miss the mark on the depth of companionship you get from another human being that you are in a relationship with and that you share a life with. There is this often-cited statistic that 90 to 95 % of the time spent together between a parent and a child is concentrated from age 0 to 18. In other words, the relationships you have with family, i.e. your partner and/or your children are just so much deeper than you will ever have with friends or, once you have a…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 06:42 PM
-1

Bravo! This has to be one of the best posts I have read on this subreddit. Generally I find this particular subreddit oscillates between very reasonable posts (like your own) and the batshit crazy. However, it's one of the few places people actually seem to engage in dialogue. To be clear, I applaud your post even though there are things I disagree with. I generally agree with you that these "gender wars" have been with us for a long time and that since the advent of social media, this particula…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/09/25 04:09 AM
–

True that!
/r/PurplePillDebate05/09/25 05:01 AM
2

I know Virginia is anything but the deep south. But still...that seems outlandish to me, even if yes it matches some experiences I made when I first moved to the US in the late 90s.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 01:07 PM
1

Looking at the answers here, I think you are right that there is a bit miscommunication here. The term “sexual variety” is often used when really what we are talking about is “sexual novelty”, in other words men’s propensity to be aroused by women they have not slept with… “fresh booty” so to speak. Undoubtedly, the interest sexual novelty can include an interest in sexual variety, but not necessarily. This phenomenon also has a name of course, the Coolidge Effect and from what I have read, it’s…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 11:55 AM
1

As I just wrote in my other comment...I think a lot of what OP describes is particular to the American experience. I am also from Europe (Germany) and dating/coupling is really quite different there. In the US, I really have gotten the sense that gender roles, attitudes about sex, etc. are often quite outdated and typically saturated with a puritanical/Christian morality. There is a lot of decorum to dating in the US and more importantly, I feel Americans also live in what I would describe as an…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 05:40 AM
3

Ah the South...not exactly the heart of Dixie, but damn! What you and OP are describing is like stepping back in history a good 50 to 75 years. I mean when I came to the US (the West), it was striking how much more old fashioned many Americans still were and even today are, especially about gender roles. I will say that a lot of what I see written in this subreddit seems to be particularly colored by the cultural peculiarities of America. Everything from fairly antiquated gender roles to strange…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/09/25 05:26 AM
3

..and this was in the Westen hemisphere??
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 08:25 PM
3

I really just want to know where on earth you lived between the year 1995 and 2005 that you felt “pressured” to be a in a relationship with a guy that you weren’t attracted to? America is the land of hyperbole no doubt, but to insinuate that women in the 90s and 2000s didn’t have agency in their personal relationships is as someone else put it… not in line with reality!
/r/PurplePillDebate03/09/25 06:54 PM
3

Well I am certainly not advocating for "leading on" girls. But I will say don't expect guys to be upfront about their intentions either, which typically is that most guys are hesitant to commit. That's the kind of harsh truth girls just don't want to hear, but ultimately should know to be the case.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/25 07:24 PM
5

It really shouldn't be that hard and to be blunt with you, for "normal guys" it really isn't that hard either.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/25 05:31 PM
10

Agree with both of you and the previous comment and I am as critical of hypergamous women as anyone. But trying to rationalize this perverted sense of entitlement with this pseudo-intellectual drives is just nauseating. The bottom line is if you want to find yourself a gal, go out and get yourself one. And if you are unable to do so, perhaps you have bigger fish to fry.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/25 05:29 PM
6

It’s an old sales trick. You tell the girl what she wants to hear. Amazingly some girls still need to learn that life isn’t a Disney fairy tale and that her Prince Charming is also just a lustful horndog looking to get a release. Maybe the real solution is more sex education, including psychological aspects of sexuality.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/08/25 10:38 AM
2

I don't know OP's friends, but I'd bet it's mostly just banter. Few guys I know would really give a damn if their mate is sleeping with a bunch of women or if he is doing the exclusivity.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/25 05:22 PM
4

I can't say the other takes are unreasonable because at least these ladies are all being honest. But your take seems to be the only one grounded in actual reality. For a woman to believe that there isn't an unspoken debt incurred when a guy pays for dinner (maybe not the first one, but surely the second or third) is just foolish. And as you said, it's ultimately a meaningless token of financial/materialistic generosity. It's meaningless for one because financial generosity in the context of a lo…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 07:10 PM
1

I just wanted clarification on your position, which you really haven't provided, but I guess that's not to be expected... have a good day!
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 06:03 PM
5

Sure context matters. A drink paid for by a “total stranger” at a bar for the opportunity to have a chat with you, a chat from which you could excuse yourself before you have even finished the drink, is different than a “total stranger” asking you out to dinner, one that you cannot reasonably excuse yourself from after the appetizer.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 05:45 PM
7

Let me be more clear for you then: Yes! You should care about the person that (a) you chose to spend time with and that (b) chose to spend time with and money for your enjoyment.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 05:37 PM
15

If you don’t care about the person who you chose to spend time with and who is paying for your dinner, don’t you think you are wasting his time and money?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 05:13 PM
6

I came across a similar post the other day where my gut reaction was exactly the same. These types of insecurities are not overcome with rational arguments. Like the saying goes, if you can’t stand the heat, don’t get a job in a kitchen.. until maybe one day you come to realization how foolish that all is.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/25 01:13 AM
1

Have you dated in the anglosphere, specifically the US? Gender roles here are still old-fashioned compared to Europe, but of course, they are not 1950s old-fashioned.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/25 02:44 PM
–

From this account about your life of the past 2 years, I really just hope the relationship of 6 months included regular fornication. But to reiterate another comment on this thread, if you are already making out with girls regularly, that should invariably lead to sex, not always, but certainly every now and then. Unless of course you are a terrible kisser!
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/25 02:39 PM
–

So when it rains, I am supposed to close the window?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/25 02:34 PM
1

Just another way in which society is clearly running towards self-immolation… smh!
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/25 10:08 PM
2

As I said before, I think generally speaking you are onto something - i.e. why men find casual sex more rewarding than relationship sex. But I think your argument is a bit shoddy. I think you are trying too hard to put it into the framework of marketing & sales and I think along the way you are missing some of the actual points here. But if I am reading you correctly, you are really trying to say that for men, the dating game indeed is very much like a game, with winners and loser, risks and rew…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/25 03:07 PM
3

This could have been an interesting argument, but it’s pretty thin on any salient points and pretty thick on pseudo-economics. Most importantly you probably missed the one big and generally accepted argument in your favor probably because you have never heard of it: the Coolidge Effect! The Coolidge Effect, which has been widely observed among male member of many species of animals, is probably the strongest argument why men are consistently drawn new sexual mates, i.e. why the idea of novelty i…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/07/25 02:33 PM
4

Big time. All this transactionalism is BS and in the end you are only short-changing yourself if you are hanging around people for the wrong reasons.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/25 04:26 PM
–

Fair question. I definitely find them easy on the eye! But my friendship with them goes far deeper than any sexual attraction I feel for them. I will add one thing and that may explain how I can be friends with attractive women: I have never pursued anyone romantically or even sexually who I consider a friend. So I exclusively date only outside that circle. But even for that pool of women, I tend to be quite picky actually. If I don’t feel any significant sexual chemistry, I pretty much stop my …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/25 01:45 PM
–

I have amazing women friends. And because some of my lady friends are also quite hot, sometimes I will steal them to skip the line at a club, although admittedly it’s been a while!
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/25 12:51 PM
–

It was actually a question, but never mind. I get that for some it’s just a trigger. Have a nice day!
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/25 12:48 PM
–

Between men feeling entitled to get laid and women feeling entitled for commitment, what’s the difference?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/25 12:42 PM
1

That's what I thought you were saying. It's ultimately just a weird ego thing..."making her wait" to make himself feel better. Ironically, I think the girls on this thread who are swooning over this pseudo gallantry really ought to know better. Deep down they know he'd just be filtered out with that kind of behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/25 06:41 PM
2

So if I am understanding you correctly you are saying that the idea of making her wait is entirely self-serving with no real consideration for developing or exploring the relationship itself?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/25 04:59 PM
1

Listen you do whatever you want and whatever works for you. And frankly, there is nothing radical about waiting a couple of dates before initiating anything physical. That really wasn't my point anyway. What I find noteworthy in a lot of these comment is (a) just how hung up people get about sex - like it's holy grail of the relationship - and (b) how much wishful thinking is being expressed. Ultimately you have to keep in mind that women are constantly filtering out. They may say oh what a grea…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/25 03:31 AM
–

Well said!
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/25 01:59 AM
-1

Wow! Didn’t expect Madame Esquire to struggle with what I thought was a straightforward comment. Where exactly did I say that 30-60 days of sexual abstinence is tantamount to the lifestyle of a monk or nun? But hey sometimes we just misunderstand, so let me paraphrase my earlier comment as to eliminate any ambiguity here: if I don’t see anything wrong with sexual abstinence as a personal choice in a way, shape or form, why would it bother me if someone feels the need to be sexually abstinent for…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/25 01:53 AM
0

An actual answer. I appreciate it! In my opinion hard rules about sex, as when it happens are a bunch of BS. Sometimes it can be the same night, other times it can take a month or more. It's all a matter of chemistry and the specifics of the moment. As for communication about sex, I wish women were as open as you seem to suggest you are. In my experience, I can have such conversations primarily only with European women. Many American women seem easily put off by the subject, misinterpreting it a…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 04:18 PM
-5

People chose to live as nuns and monks and I don't see anything wrong with that. So why would I care if people chose to pair up with sexuality and sexual compatibility being of lesser or even no importance. Whatever makes you happy! Doesn't change my thoughts on sexual repression.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 04:10 PM
-4

You think you are pretty clever, huh? But all snarkiness aside, I am actually genuinely curious how your conversation about intimacy typically goes. You label yourself a "promiscuous woman" so I gather you are pretty matter-of-fact about sex and I would assume that you don't mind if the guy broaches the subject. In my experience, people who are "shy" to engage in intimacy see "sexualized" conversation as a big red flag or even a reason for panic I think. And I don't blame the women. In many cult…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 03:56 PM
-5

I know am going to catch some flag for this, but "physically comfortable" sounds about as sexually repressed as anything I have ever heard. It's like watching an Asian romcom where they hold hands and the whole rooms starts giggling.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 03:46 PM
-1

I am genuinely curious. How does your conversation about physical intimacy usually go? I am always reminded of this bit by Larry David, granted it's more directly about the subject of consent... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZDrymMvc31k
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 03:42 PM
1

Granted nobody wants to be treated like a piece of meat, but what if the guy just simply won't escalate and let sexual tension just dissipate into the ether? Do you really see yourself hanging out with a guy for a month or two without any kind of physical intimacy (other than making out)?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 03:24 PM
13

Someone got dumped for a guy with actual personality. Sucks for you! Go get yourself some of your own personality!
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 01:53 PM
1

Very interesting comment. And while I’d add the caveat that women in Latin America can often be extremely jealous and possessive because of how some men philander in that part of the world, I would nonetheless absolutely agree that much of the debate about dating and gender roles in the US is still very much colored by a profound and pervasive sexual repression that has its roots in the puritan morality of the people that settled this country.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 01:08 PM
1

Not to sound judgmental to the OP here, but I think the reasons you provide are 100x more sounds than the issue of reputational damage! I think that’s ultimately why women are not drawn to casual flings nearly at the same level as men and why even sexually active women take their time to get to know (i.e. vet) the guy!
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 12:55 PM
1

...for sure!
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 04:37 AM
8

That just sounds nuts to me. Sex (both in casual or committed situations) should be something to be enjoyed, not something to be feared for potential social repercussions. Your comment saddens me frankly!
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 04:36 AM
4

I see...Europe is not a homogenous place either I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 04:33 AM
43

When I read posts like this, I can't help but think that Europeans and Americans really are quite a bit different. I am astounded how your comment is so incredibly saturated with the Puritan legacy of America. Casual sex could be so simple: just 2 consenting adults wanting to enjoy each other's company without judgement or any risk for reputational damage.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/25 04:00 AM
3

Inhibition: Other than alcohol this seems to be a question about her willingness to engage in “risky” behavior. Especially as a guy, I think the skill is to be able to escalate sexually while also making her feel secure in being with you. Neuroticism (or the lack thereof): This is an interesting one. In my mind what makes it fun to be around outgoing people is that they really engage with you. Like a good sales man they will make you feel better about yourself at least in the moment. It’s that c…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/25 03:12 PM
1

🤣 you got it!
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 04:02 PM
1

For sure. I have dating experience primarily in Europe and the US, but also to a limited degree in South America and South East Asia. I would ignore the latter 2 because the dynamic as a white (European) man in those places is just so markedly different. So my experience there is really not relevant I think. Between Europe and the US, however, the dating experience has always seemed strikingly different to me. In the US, dating seems a lot more formal, rooted in fairly traditional gender roles (…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 04:01 PM
1

Precisely! I think with regard to acceptance/interest for casual sex among women, you will probably see a pretty sharp curve with far more women at the younger age (before 25) than at older age (above 25) engaging in that type of behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 01:18 PM
3

Interesting, but I’d caution with a couple of points here. In terms of population, Norway is half the size of NYC, so I wonder just from a data point alone, how relevant any comparisons between the US and Norway even are, i.e. it’s Oslo and a bunch of small towns and villages. Secondly, I am not really talking about prevalence of hook up culture or even people’s propensity for casual sex. Why? Well because in the US that actually varies A TON depending on whether you find yourself in highly urba…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 01:14 PM
23

I'd be a bit more specific. Whereas for a majority of men, the idea of easily available casual sex is an absolutely dream-come-true-scenario, for the majority of women, casual sex just does not carry that same level of appeal. But there is a relatively small percentage of women who love casual sex. And one group to not be underestimated is younger, college-aged women who definitely view high school and college as a time frame to spread your wings. The other caveat I would throw in is that this p…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/25 07:37 AM
2

Do you delay having sex?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/25 07:41 PM
2

I don’t think the work itself is a problem at all and I am certainly not concerned about any moral issues. But I think there are some very practical concerns. The real question is how do you feel about dating someone who has videos of herself getting railed and jizzed on all over the internet basically into perpetuity (or vice versa if you are dating a guy who did porn). What are you going to tell your kids when they learn that mommy’s or daddy’s most private moments are all over the web? The ot…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/25 02:53 PM
6

When push comes to shove, who‘s your daddy!? Regardless, people like OP actually taking the time to verbalize such strange ideas is indeed amusing and entertaining!
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/25 05:20 PM
6

Well yeah! 😆
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 03:14 PM
54

What irritates me is that you wouldn’t give them your honest views. Why?? That seems about as passive aggressive as anything I have ever read! Funny enough you don’t even disagree that online dating provides two different sources of frustration to men and women respectively. Beyond that I don’t think it even matters who wins the argument. At the end of the day, you just have to recognize that there are only 2 small groups of people that are served well by online dating apps: 1) women who don’t m…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/25 01:14 PM
3

Your question rests on the assumption that attraction works the same for men and women. Most data we have says otherwise. A woman’s desire is a lot less visual than a man’s desire. Emotional bonding and a feeling of safety is far more important for women than it is for men. The fact that you don’t even address the subject of safety and emotional connection goes to show how unimportant those things are for men.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/25 01:30 PM
3

I think this is a very simplistic way of looking at the dating market and the people who are in it. For example, if you look at single women who are looking to find long term partners vs. single women who are looking for just a good time. For the latter women, the contemporary dating market, i.e. online dating, is basically a candy land of opportunities, whereas a woman looking to find a serious partner will invariably have to spend a LOT of time filtering. So the question of who has it easier i…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/25 05:04 AM
2

What amuses me is that at the front of the line of pictures, you always get the one that a) shows the most skin or b) shows her with her hot friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/25 05:31 PM
3

Because women have no agency whatsoever.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/25 10:41 AM
0

Oh dear… did you get it out of your system? Good!
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/25 11:14 AM
0

More like holding your cards close to your chest and keeping your options open. It’s a reality if you like it or not. At the end of the day it’s not about who is morally in the right or wrong. But it’s about getting to a place that works for both parties.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/25 07:43 PM
2

That’s a very good point! There is a total asymmetry between men and women when it comes to the question of how upfront one should be about one’s intentions. While for women it makes sense to state your intentions clearly and unambiguously as a means of filtering from what is most likely a large pool of potential mates, for men it’s a far more delicate balance between obviously being as honest as you can be without getting filtered out unnecessarily just because you gave what is perceived as the…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/25 05:30 AM
7

So my first answer was a bit snippish, wasn't it? Well, I'd like to think that i can do better. Holding a door open to a woman (any woman be it your grandma, your girlfriend or any random person who identifies as a woman), buying your girlfriend flowers, buying her little gifts here and there, maybe even making a little something for her if you are the creative type, inviting and treating her to dinner, generally being attentive to your romantic interest. In other words all those things we think…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/25 05:15 PM
3

Speak for yourself! Or actually don’t because you are just too funny!
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/25 04:39 PM
5

Who are you kidding? Princess treatment is NOT holding the door open for a girl or buying her some flowers! Hilarious!!
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/25 04:21 PM
5

Women's expectations in 2025: Be given the same career opportunities as men to be able to accumulate their own funds and assets Be given the princess treatment, i.e. a luxury lifestyle funded by by their male partner Be given love and devotion irrespective of their fading physical beauty Not all women have all these expectations and many accept that the princess treatment is irreconcilable with contemporary feminist notions of financial equality (1). More importantly though, women who want the p…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/25 02:55 PM
28

Spot on! These posts are such BS. The world is full of winners and those who don’t win. If you want better chances at being with women, be a winner! And to be very clear about it, if you have to choose between changing yourself or hoping that everyone else around you will change for your benefit, the choice should be pretty simple.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 01:03 PM
2

Seriously! What is this man trying to prove? I mean at some point it’s not even about the question who handles the bill but do you respect the boundaries and decisions of the person sitting opposite of you? I am a bit over the question who pays for dates anyway. Needless to say it’s a very much a cultural thing and the phrase “going Dutch” exists for a reason because Northern Europeans tend to be quite a bit more egalitarian and pragmatic about these issues than Americans, where traditional deco…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/25 03:21 PM
1

Maybe it's just my impression, but this seem like a pretty loaded question. First of all, the period of time from when a couple starts dating to the point where marriage is proposed/agreed upon varies A LOT! Google says the average period is 4.9 years. Anecdotally, we all know couples that tied the knot within months and others who might date over a decade. Then, frankly there is the alternative of a domestic partnership over marriage, which is becoming a lot more commonplace in western societie…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/25 06:31 PM
3

This sounds pretty representative. All my female friends that seem socially well-adjusted have never had problems getting into and staying in relationships. Of the ones that are single, it seems to be either by choice or a mix of personal and cultural factors hindering them from meeting men both in real life and certainly in an online dating environment. We are talking about very introverted personalities as well as women from culturally quite conservative backgrounds - both seemingly manifestin…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/25 04:49 PM
–

Isn’t this a bit like saying it’s not worth having friends of another ethnicity, friends who practice another religion or really anyone who is different from you and who you have nothing to gain from. Honestly, this has to be dumbest shit I have read on here.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/25 10:51 PM
2

I think you really need to distinguish between physical attractiveness and overall attractiveness. Physical attractiveness - this might be a bit more rare, but sure quite a few women might appear physically more child like in their youth (quite skinny for example) and may develop more of a feminine figure in their late 20s or 30s. Adding a bit of body fat in the right places can make a huge difference. And of course we are not talking about those individuals who basically didn’t take care of the…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/25 04:55 AM
–

Amen to that. I can understand that as men, we have a pretty high “baseline” horniness. But ultimately to really get into it, nothing is more of a turn off than a sexual partner who does not reciprocate your enthusiasm. So men just going at it with someone who clearly isn’t into it has always been hard to fathom for me. In other words, to me the whole sexual assault, rape thing is not only reprehensible from how it victimizes people, but an utterly grotesque emulation of what sex is supposed to …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/25 12:23 AM
2

I am going to disagree with you and recommend you engage with people living in real destitution.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/25 06:50 AM
2

Mental health issues implies trauma. The point is compared to people who really live with existential problems, these are all just first world inconveniences!
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/25 06:16 AM
2

That's a tough one. One of the life lessons I learned some time ago that normal does not really exist. Take for example the notion of a "normal" person. When I was in grad school, I lived in university housing. After a while, everyone - certainly all the women (no offense) - seemed kind a batshit crazy to me and one of my best friends. They all either seemed super jealous, antisocial, generally bitchy or worst really conniving. There was one girl though in our house who seemed just so grounded, …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/25 03:43 AM
4

You are correct, partnerships cannot compensate for shortcomings in your own personal life. In fact the better you are as an independent, functional human being, the better your odds are of being in a successful relationship. But my point is a different one, to live a full life of meaning also involves having relationships, intimate and platonic ones with other human beings. Relationships don’t have to last forever or they can last a lifetime. Relationships can fail, relationships can flourish. …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/25 12:08 AM
2

What passes for “trauma” nowadays is certainly debatable. My grandparents witnessed indescribable death and destruction, yet were able to raise 3 fairly well-adjusted children on the one side and 7 equally well-adjusted children on the other side of the family.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/25 11:59 PM
8

I think being able to have “normal” relationships with men/women is definitely a big part of being a psychologically and socially well adjusted member of society.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/25 08:05 PM
-1

I think men and women can complain all they want and until the paint peels off the walls, but you are not going to change the basic dimorphism in human sexual behavior. Men will always instinctively pursue sexual opportunities and will cast a wider net to do so while women, on the receiving end of pursuit, will always be the ones filtering potential mates. Those are our roles in human mating behavior and procreation.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/25 02:01 PM
1

How about just seeing people for who they are - individuals with both positive and negative traits. A lot of people, both men and women, respond to kindness. Maybe try that instead of throwing every woman under the bus like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/25 05:01 PM
1

And you find this to be a revelation?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/25 05:05 AM
1

My point is that perhaps you are not asking the right questions. Are men aroused more easily and more frequently? Yes. And now? I will grant you that there are those who have a hard time accepting this aspect of men’s sexuality and instead prefer stamping men as moral degenerates for our lustful ways. But beyond that, I think the usefulness of your question is quite limited. Or to be more blunt, you are asking the wrong question! After all women do get sexually aroused and not only at the sight …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/25 03:52 AM
1

You guys are ignoring that a man's and a woman's sex drive is simply very different. A man's sex drive, i.e. a man's ability to be sexually aroused, is kind of like a single lever where as a woman's sex drive has several levers that all need to be pointed in the same direction for her to get aroused. For that reason, comparing women and men in terms of who is the hornier sex is really beside the point. Frankly it's also useless. But yes, because a man's sex drive is like a single lever, men get …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/25 02:29 AM
1

It's nice to see when someone gets it.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/25 01:49 AM
11

Here is perhaps a better way to put it. In terms of both goals for dating and invariably sex, women tend to maximize for quality whereas men tend to maximize for quantity. It follows that a man’s and woman’s libido are expressed differently. For men, sex drive is a bit more of a baseline thing: arousal is quick and frequent, visual stimuli (actual or imagined) is really all that is required. For a woman, her sex drive is regulated by a more complex set of factors: visual stimuli, olfactory stimu…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 04:07 PM
1

This question is hilarious because indeed, this type of behavior is so antithetical to what it means to be a man. But yeah men and women just don't understand each other half the time it seems.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 05:42 AM
0

It depends. Cheating can take on so many different forms and even the definition of what constitutes cheating will vary and with the negative consequences. Frankly even the cultural context needs to be considered. Needless to say many Americans have a bit of a puritan outlook on life, i.e. infidelity tends to be portrayed as a black and white matter. I would argue that in other cultures such indiscretions are tolerated a lot more and therefore the behavior will perhaps be more commonplace even i…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 06:56 AM
4

While pretty incoherent, this all sounds like a very sad love life. Maybe go out and try to connect with the person first. Regardless of whether you are looking for casual or more serious relations, you'd be surprised the things you can learn about life.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/25 06:54 PM
1

Interesting topic, but ironically, I think the question is a bit misleading. So there is clearly a range here when it comes to operating with honesty - From one extreme end, - brutal honesty - where you lay it all out upfront without reservations to the other extreme end - intentional deceit - where your stated intentions are diametrically different from your actual intentions, and of course, in between a million shades of grey! Where you ultimately fall into this spectrum will depend both as mu…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/25 07:33 PM
1

🤣 Thought a straight dude wrote that and it surely reads very different!
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/25 12:27 AM
1

Has the original poster ever had NSA sex? It seems like they have not. The number 1 rule is not pushing women for casual sex. For the vast majority of women, that is the number 1 red flag. So the less you push, the more you are likely to actually get it.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/25 05:12 PM
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I don't understand why some women routinely become such brainless ideologues about this subject. "Equal pay" is not a thing you pick out from a buffet only when it suits you! And if your issue is financial security during and after pregnancy, the answer isn't to revert to the 1950s nuclear family (do women really want that???), but to be in place where parental leave is adequately funded!
/r/PurplePillDebate12/02/25 02:39 PM
1

For sure!
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 07:22 PM
1

What a fascinating graph! Family, church and the primary/secondary school were the primary avenues, replaced by college, the network of friends and coworkers, to be replaced by social venues and of course social media. I bet social venues have also taken a major hit since the pandemic.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 06:18 AM
6

It sure seems like men get shamed quite a bit for promiscuity nowadays.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/25 05:03 AM
2

I don't think this has anything to do with being an "alpha" type.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/25 04:48 AM
18

I think one of the bigger issues that men deal with that can lead to mental health issues is the idea that a man's self-worth is still largely measured in terms of achievements/accomplishments. A big part of male socialization from a young age is to be competitive, to fight for your place in the sun and to earn your place in the world. Will Smith's movie "Pursuit of Happiness" is the perfect representation of this particular notion of masculinity - i.e. you have to do whatever it takes to win in…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/25 06:08 PM
3

Indeed! Herein lies the big confusion in modern day gender roles. But let’s also be honest, there is a large number of women who don’t mind at all being the main income earner and who don’t feel the need to be looked after financially by men. Is it nearly enough women who have woken up to this modern reality that with their newly attained privileges also come new responsibilities? Most certainly not! A man without a decent-earning job is still often considered a failure and money too often is st…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/25 03:50 PM
8

Couldn’t agree more. I would go even further. Americans have a neck for turning social gatherings into these mini showcase events, where everyone seemingly goes into sales mode and presents a certain side of themselves, resulting in this constant social juggling. Americans always ask what you do for work at least in part to size up your paycheck and generally get a sense where you are on the pegging order of life. A lot of Americans frankly really have a hard time being themselves. Combine this …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/12/24 08:19 AM
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This really makes me want to watch that movie again. It's one of my favorites, but I can see where you are coming from. It's from 1999 and it certainly isn't shy about serving up certain cliches.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/12/24 02:56 AM
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I apologize for going off on a bit of a tangent here, but your question really sparked this train of thought and I also think it's related to the question you ask. At the level of an individual at least, I wonder if conservative environments are actually more conducive to advancement and empowerment of women. There are plenty of examples from around the world of women becoming national leaders in very conservative countries or at least within conservative political parties. From conservative lea…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/12/24 06:25 AM
2

As i said in my other response. I completely agree that ultimately most successful relationships are between people who share certain fundamentals…like if you are more on the intellectual side or more the physically active side. Values, interests, overall outlook on life. So I am not arguing for the “opposites attract” thing. What I am disagreeing with is this “check list” thinking, that someone needs to be all these different things to keep up with me. That’s super sad and frankly says somethin…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/24 09:18 PM
5

Listen, most successful relationships are ultimately between men and women who share interests, values and who have a similar outlook on life. I get that. But the way you are talking about, it sure sounds like the same sort of check list thinking men criticize women for. Rather than saying, you don’t match my profile, wouldn’t you be interested in what someone else can bring to the table in terms of life experience, interests, views?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/24 09:10 PM
11

I hate to be contrarian here. But what you describe is someone who would be better of talking to a mirror or a chatbot than other people, i.e. someone pretty self-absorbed. And honestly that’s a problem you evidently find with both men and women. This notion that a person needs to check off a certain list of requirements…how sad! In my opinion the point of meeting new people is finding out about them, having a curiosity for their lives rather than needing a sounding board for your own life. If t…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/12/24 05:46 PM
7

Good post. There is this strange inflection point where this whole “modern man” space turns from generally good life advise on how to be a better man to a set of pretty bad ideas about masculine fatalism and a kind of false victimhood. We should always strive to be better, but don’t do it just so you get to bang Mary-Jane. Do it so you find a good purpose in life, so you can feel good about your life choices. And part of that is accepting that some men have always had it easier getting laid, get…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/24 05:40 PM
12

As a guy, of course anything that gets me off will do the job. But first time sex is rarely the best sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/24 07:26 AM
1

And I tend to do prefer the approach of “better the devil you know than the devil you don’t”, even though yes, there are situations where I would also advise to stick with a binary choice, i.e. cut the cancer!
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/24 02:58 PM
1

I think that is the point here. You can disagree in principle with your friend about the morality of their behavior without making an overt gesture about your own morality, i.e. cutting the friend out of your circle or otherwise ostracizing the "mistress".
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/24 02:09 AM
1

But are you cutting out your friend because you have discovered she is sleeping with a married man? To me that's a little bit like the Vegan who can no longer have meat-eating friends because they tacitly indulge in behavior that is cruel to animal's welfare.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/24 02:06 AM
4

What a sensible comment! As a European, I am always astounded at the overt display of these very puritanical mores among Americans. Not to sound Anti-American, but social ethics aren't exactly a hallmark of US culture and when compared to other cultures around the globe often take a backseat to a prevalent transactional mentality, i.e. dog-eat-dog world. Especially in matters of fidelity it seems a bit ironic to be so judgmental because I get the sense that a lot cheaters make pretty informed ch…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/24 06:51 PM
36

I think for women that are open to non-committed encounters, online dating works almost perfectly. But among the female friends that I’d consider “sex positive” like that, I’d say almost all of them will still be pretty selective. And that selection process takes time. They will aim for the most attractive guys, but as one would expect, those in particular can be hard to pin down.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/24 04:49 PM
0

I still don’t really get your point. I mean I understand that we need to be attracted to our partners. But I don’t think that’s what “standards” about. That’s more about things like how we dress, the career choices we make, the academic credentials we bring, our financial situation, the way we act in certain situations. Again a lot of that seems a bit superficial in the context of dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/24 09:51 AM
0

I am honestly not understanding how this relates to my point. Not saying that it’s your mistake.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/24 03:47 AM
2

Precisely! Get to know a person, find out what he or she is about, his/her life experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/24 12:59 AM
0

"High standards" to me sounds more like a check list an HR person would compare your resume to than the idea of a set of "preferences". Of course, we all either prefer in-n-out or shake shack, brown eyes or blue eyes, big butts or big boobs, women with college degrees or long finger nails. And some of us dabble in all of it because we are also curious to get to know the person inside that body. Funny enough HR people run into same issue all the time. Your ultimately somewhat arbitrary "standards…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/24 07:03 PM
3

Whatever happened to dating people rather than resumes? But listen, people have a way of sorting themselves out pretty effectively. So I don’t know if there is a need to invoke this notion of high standards, whatever tf means anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/24 06:41 PM
1

Here is an aspect of this that I feel is often ignored. Generally speaking, men are expected to be the assertive gender and the pursuer of women. But once in a relationship, it is expected that they are tame and domesticated. Considering that few men are born with such assertive personalities and that most men need to cultivate them instead over many years, I have always found it a bit puzzling that women then expect men to cast aside or at least tame that wild side, which indeed is what often a…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/09/24 05:16 PM
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This sounds more like you are talking about the specificity of your sexual needs rather than the “sexual plausibility” of attractive men you encounter. I guess this goes to highlight the differences in sex drive between men and women - sex (or sexual gratification) for men being more a baseline need like food or sleep whereas for women it just tends to be a lot more specific and intertwined with emotional well-being.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/08/24 10:32 PM
2

Have you lived in Europe? I have and I can tell you that when it comes to dating, the dynamics are quite different. Of course, I am not saying that this problem doesn't exist there too, but just not nearly at the same level as it does here.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/24 03:37 AM
6

It's noteworthy that to a significant extent, the current state of things seems to be a particularly American problem, one that is also found in regions of the planet that model themselves after American culture. I am not talking about domestic violence here. But in terms of dating, Europeans, for example, seem to follow and approach that is not nearly as "codified" as it is in North America. It generally more a thing that happens as a kind of extension of social circles and it's also a lot less…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/24 03:22 AM
14

It's a meme, but I think the idea that men have a tendency to maximize their dating approach for quantity over quality certainly has merit.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/24 03:44 AM
1

Ok I thought a bit more about this. My point is that in your assumptions (that men can be single just like women) you are implying that apples are the same as oranges. The motivations for men and women to pursue a relationship in the first place is really somewhat different. Men's desires are more physical in nature, closely tied to testosterone and other hormones that fuel a man's sex drive and that generally speaking make men laser focused on pursuing women. Women's needs are more psychosocial…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/24 05:27 PM
1

But that’s my point. What ultimately motivates men to pursue women? To pursue relationships with women? Fundamentally it’s a man’s generally much higher sex drive, is it not? While there are many complex benefits to coupling up for both men and women, the main difference between the sexes is the instinctual motivation to pursue intercourse, which is qualitatively stronger and more frequent in men.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/24 02:42 PM
1

I’m curious about the way you phrase your question. Aren’t you really asking what dating would look like if men across the board had a much lower sex drive and therefore weren’t inherently motivated to pursue women? I don’t think being single is as big of an issue for men. While men undoubtedly also have needs with regard to emotional intimacy and security, I don’t think it’s the primary driver in men’s pursuit of women.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/24 08:17 AM
1

I think to some extent this is a particularly American issue...one that can admittedly also be found in other cultures. By this I mean tabooing candid conversations about sexuality. Indeed you will find that many European women will be far more comfortable talking about the subject even on a first date assuming of course, you are not approaching the subject like a teenage horn dog but with the respect and dignity it deserves. Conversely, I have had conversation with women from some cultural circ…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/24 07:15 PM
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Women tend to maximize for quality whereas men tend to maximize for quantity. I am not sure why we have such a hard time accepting this basic truth and why instead of trying to empathize for each others proclivities we instead pass judgement.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/24 06:29 AM
1

You seem to be dead set on tying lower marriage rates on women demanding to marry up. I think the lack of marriage is much more complicated and tied to the rise and acceptance of divorce, new social norms, in the US specifically, huge incarceration rates. The trend for women who require the man earn more is down though, not up. I am not actually. I agree with you for sure!
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/24 12:58 AM
2

Correct me if I am wrong, but it seems to me that you are claiming that marriage statistics in the US, particularly with regard to educated men and women, disproves the notion that hypergamy, i.e. that women seek men of greater achievement level, is a real thing? Am I mistaken? My point is that these stats do not refute the ideas around hypergamy (as I loosely defined it)for a number of reasons: 1) The percentage of men and women getting married overall is down. 2) More educated men and women ar…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/24 12:29 AM
2

But overall, where is the rate of married people (men and women) trending? Down, right? My point is that both arguments can be true at the same time: 1) Hypergamy as a vestige of traditional gender roles is negatively impacting the number of people (women and men) getting married. 2) Educated women are most likely to get married. For one, many women with higher degrees of education are more likely to hold more progressive views and therefore wouldn’t necessarily hold traditional views on gender …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 08:29 PM
2

The conventional wisdom seems to be that hypergamy is a cultural relic just the same way common manifestations of the patriarchy continue to linger. But I think hypergamy can also be explained in terms of biological drives. In other words, it makes perfect sense that women tend to maximize for quality in mating especially when they are faced with counterparts who tend to maximize for quantity!
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 06:53 PM
2

And that is the increasingly smaller cohort of people who are getting married.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/24 06:48 PM
7

The problem isn’t money! The problem is that a lot of women in America seem to operate on the “have their cake and eat it too” principle (which admittedly is a weird saying). In short, women in this country in particular are very comfortable with the expanded opportunities they have gained from feminism and gender equality but they also do not want to give up the privileges that traditional gender roles afford them. Hypergamy makes perfect sense in a context where men are the breadwinners. But o…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/24 02:56 AM
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Taken straight from wikipedia's page on sex differences in crime: "According to the Bureau of Justice Statistics, males experienced higher victimization rates than females for all types of violent crime except rape or other sexual assault." But at the end of the day, the victim of crime, be it a man, woman, child, elderly, disabled, etc, is probably the last person who cares about what column in the crime statistic they fall into.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/24 05:20 AM
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I think we need to stop blaming men and women for our basic instinctive tendencies, which is for men to seek a greater quantity of female partners while for women it’s the quality of the male partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/24 07:40 AM
0

Generally speaking, your observation is correct. But it’s not necessarily because men’s and women’s instincts for procreation are all that different. It’s more a matter of sexual desire expressing itself quite differently between the 2 sexes. For men, the goal of sex is to achieve a climax and ejaculate, which is why even a 30s quickie can be satisfactory albeit a bit embarrassing. And due to the nature men’s reproductive system, men are ready for the act pretty much 24/7. Why do we then expect …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/24 02:50 PM
3

Here is a common one that I think is at least somewhat controversial. Being straightforward and transparent about your intentions. It’s not that this advise is wrong or bad, but it needs to be understood with significant qualifications/limitations. This advise is often given by women with virtually unlimited choices ostensibly with the idea in mind that more clarity would allow them to filter through their choices more readily. For men with naturally less abundant choices, it’s important to unde…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/24 10:14 PM
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Ok…and what is your point again?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/24 02:55 AM
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Huh! What you call virtue signaling is what I call having an life. If you are moving to Thailand or Colombia as a 40+ yo purely to score pussy, without any interest in the culture, the language, the people you are a pretty sad moron! But hey it’s your right to live as moronic a life as you can conjure!
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/24 07:53 PM
4

Good point. You should venture to other places for the right reasons, not just to increase your odds of getting laid. Personally I have always enjoyed meeting women from other countries & cultures. Especially when traveling to those places, you get a glimpse into the culture that is much deeper than if you only visit as a tourist. Learning about the history of a place learning about the traditions people practice is absolutely fantastic.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/24 06:34 PM
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I wonder if we need to deconstruct misandry as well as misogyny a bit more instead of blanket labelling entire cohorts of people with it. Especially the term misogyny has perhaps been too widely applied in recent years. Among heterosexual people at least, I would surmise that only a fraction of men and women feel genuine contempt for the opposite gender, while the majority really feel something in between a sense of curiosity to strong attraction to outright need for a member of the opposite gen…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/24 06:03 PM
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You either live in the country side or a big enough rock of some kind…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/24 10:11 PM
1

Every now and then an enterprising young man like yourself comes around and thinks they can rewrite the rules of the game! The Deal What everyone else thinks!
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/24 04:37 PM
1

That may be and women are getting pregnant later, but I guarantee you those mother instincts are very strong! The other thing you need to consider is that with men becoming less important in women’s lives, i.e. with women having the choice between being single or in a fwb relationship, a surprisingly large number are closing staying single! Why? Because the kind of sexual needs you describe are far less imperative and pervasive to women than they are to men!
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/24 03:51 PM
2

But it’s a fact of life… getting pregnant in your late 30’s or early 40’s is far riskier both for the baby and the mother! And at least as of today, we don’t really have sufficient social structures to help young women in particular take care of babies and have a career.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/24 02:14 PM
17

Very true! Having that many choices seems incredible on the surface only. And while it definitely beats having no options, it’s very exhausting to filter through that many options. And of course the real downside is that when presented with that many choices, you are ultimately drawn to the options everyone else is drawn too, which usually tend to be the candidates who are keenly aware of their smv!
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/24 02:02 PM
5

You are ignoring women’s biological clock. Women turn 30 and “panic” about having children. Nobody really wants a kid with a fwb. Having children is far too expensive and intrusive for that kind of lifestyle. What you are describing is a male fantasy!
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/24 01:48 PM
5

Well let’s be honest, younger women these days are definitely more used to getting than giving. Wouldn’t you say? In the dating market, the onus is on the guy to make the first step. If you are going out for dinner, it’s expected that either the guy pays or that perhaps the bill is split. But nobody would ever expect the woman to pay, even if she makes double. And even in higher education and the job market, women are actively being courted to close the gender gap. None of this should be underst…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/24 08:08 PM
3

Y'all want what you can't have. But in reality, relationships (casual or committed) shouldn't be about your personal needs first, but about being willing to engage the other person openly and without prejudice.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/24 06:03 PM
2

It really depends. Some women get pretty pissed if you don't respond to their sexual advances and will turn to the next dude in line. Other women go nuts cause but will actually start obsessing over you. Either way, holding back on your sexual urges is definitely the better default mode for men. But that's different from outright stating that.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/24 06:47 AM
2

Definitely! 🥳
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/24 11:53 PM
2

Definitely! 🥳
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/24 11:53 PM
1

And I gather this is a big reason why there is so much dissatisfaction among women and which is why many women are perfectly cool with defaming men, for example in “Are we dating the same guy?” groups that have sprung up all over Facebook!
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/24 11:00 PM
6

Interesting observation. What seems like a contradiction at face value is actually perfectly rational when you look at this economically, i.e. in terms of supply and demand . Opportunities for sex are not rare for women. Quite the opposite, propositions for sex are so common for women that sex is often a bargaining chip to obtain other concessions from man, i.e. the notion of making the man work for it. Generally speaking, women are the prize, the trophy to be won by men. The only time this scri…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/24 08:56 PM
5

Chris Williamson discussed this point in an episode of his podcast with Mary Eberstadt. Essentially, the argument goes that women and men have fewer reasons to chose to live together in partnerships now that gender roles have become a matter of choice rather than set by societal norms. For example, the argument goes that traditional general roles created a pretty normative division of labor between men and women (who is the provider and who is the caretaker for example) that really made men and …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/24 06:01 AM
1

I couldn't agree more. It really seems the gender wars have reached another level in recent years. I subscribe to the idea that the poor gender relations are not necessarily a result of the break down of old gender roles, but that we haven't been able to replace them with anything particularly good. There is an interesting line of argument that birth control and the sexual revolution (among a whole host of developments) have fundamentally altered the dynamics between men and women - not necessar…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/24 04:00 AM
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Grow up girl! That’s not the same thing at all. Have you ever been to a nude or topless beach? No probably not! Maybe it’s just me being European, but the prudishness in this country is not something I will ever get used to!
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/24 08:30 AM
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All you can say to those ladies is grow up! If the trust in your man is so fragile that have a problem with him watching porn, that's on you and that's going to be major issue moving forward. Just imagine your guy has an attractive female coworker? Perhaps they even get along...are you going to be cool with that?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/24 07:01 AM
3

Actually I have never had a problem getting more than sufficient matches. So I can empathize with the overabundance problem to some degree even though a lot of women will probably seek commitment far sooner than I am comfortable with. But I was curious if FOMO in online dating is a thing for women too! I definitely think it’s a real thing for men.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/24 10:24 AM
6

When a woman goes on a dating app, she gets 100 matches. It’s impossible to give each guy a chance. This is a key statement for me. When you have 100s of suitors waiting around the corner, do you ever feel genuine fomo? Is there ever, at least in initial stage, a sense of risk involved for the girl. Does a girl think to herself "I better impress this guy and I better not mess this up"? Do girls react differently if they see a real hottie in their line up, like one of those real catches? I rememb…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/24 04:37 AM
3

I'd be really curious to learn what field you are in?! I have only once come across a situation, for example, where a female interviewee was in my view excluded because the hiring person thought the woman would be a risk to the project because of family planning concerns. Funny enough the person hiring was a very liberal (member of the green party) gay man.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/02/24 11:01 PM
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My heart goes out to you ☺️I know as a man that probably doesn’t mean much to you!
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/24 11:49 PM
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I am really sorry that you loath men that much!
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/24 11:33 PM
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It seems a bit audacious that women who are alive today are now assuming to speak on behalf of all women who have lived throughout history! With all due respect and even in consideration of the fact that in the abstract, we can have that conversation, the notion that I can put the human suffering of all of my ancestors on my flag is just total baloney. For one, beyond my grand parents’ generation, I don’t really have any good idea what my ancestors thought and felt. It’s quite possible that the …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/24 03:27 PM
-14

200,000 years of victimhood? lol…have we reached a new level of victimhood fetishization?!
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/24 09:14 AM
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She was a wannabe-artist and authored her own wikipedia entry.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/24 06:10 AM
1

I would wager that the best sex is during the honeymoon phase of a relationship. In the first couple of years (time frames vary of course), when the novelty and primal excitement hasn’t worn off yet but you also know what you are working with. Beyond that honeymoon phase, it requires a certain amount of effort and lots of communication to keep things interesting to keep the desire fueled! Unfortunately, it’s easier to fall into stale patterns that can make the sex a lot less exciting. As for cas…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/24 05:34 PM
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Indeed, it's somewhat counterintuitive. But I guess it's just difficult to shame people with nuance and granularity.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/24 09:10 PM
3

It’s worth noting that extramarital affairs are particularly stigmatized in the US, a legacy of American‘s puritanical ways that is evident in the responses to this thread. In Europe, for example, extramarital transgression at least seem to be talked about more openly and in places like southern Europe and other parts of the world, there is almost a tacit acceptance that men will eventually sway from their marital vows. For example I recall the opinion that an extramarital make-out session reall…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/24 04:10 PM
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You are right. As a society-writ-large, we definitely fetishize youth (in women) just like we also fetishize wealth and power (particularly with men). But I would be curious to know who exactly does the fetishizing here? For example, do you think the majority of middle-aged men on dating apps specifically set their target range to 18 to 20? Or is it perhaps 18 to 25...or is probably 18 to 40 or more likely even 25 to 40? In other words, I am 100% positive that men try to go for the youngest and …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/24 06:31 PM
1

Beauty standards are heavily influenced by cultural norms too. Hairstyle, skin tone, treatment of body hair, adornments to the body (tattoos, jewelry) and fashion sensibilities are heavily influenced by cultural factors. But I guarantee you the one thing you certainly won’t find anywhere is young women making themselves look like 60 year old women. Also you got your theory of hypergamy wrong. Women are not selecting for the “best” genes, but for social status - it’s primarily explained with acce…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/24 01:52 PM
1

It's pretty simple actually! Women's attractiveness (negatively) correlates pretty closely with age! A woman's peak sexual market value is between 18 to 25. Without almost any exception, beauty products and other means to improve appearance are designed to make a woman look closer to her peak physical age, i.e. how she looked in her prime. I mean do we need to spell it out...supple skin, wrinkle-free face, perky mammarian glands. Men and women only have that in that age group. If hypergamy wasn'…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/24 06:45 AM
1

Generally speaking, men are wired to approach mating opportunistically while women are wired to be selective. And what seems like a bug is actually a feature in an evolutionary sense
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/24 09:04 AM
1

Look up this topic in women only groups, for example the infamous "Are we dating the same guy" groups. The answer is typically a resounding: "yes, the guy should pay for everything." But the bigger issue here is that the custom of men footing an expensive dinner bill ultimately sets up a potentially very uncomfortable transactional situation in which it's quite unclear what is expected in return for this "generosity". Some guys are happy with just the company, others (the majority I'd bet) expec…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/24 05:09 AM
1

Your post will surely illicit a lot of backlash and understandably so. But I think what you are really getting at is the Coolidge effect and how it affects men in particular. According to the Coolidge effect, men in particular will be instinctually driven to seek out new sexual partners, for one because the sexual arousal for the old partner wears off over time while at the same time novelty will lead to greater arousal. Now consider the fact that we live in a society where cheating is deemed im…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/24 04:45 AM
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Women are not against casual sex per se, i.e. women who say they require commitment from a man before engaging intercourse are often more flexible than they claim. Indeed as others have pointed out in this thread, for the right guy, women will drop any requirement for commitment. The real issue could perhaps be described in terms of supply & demand. For average women, the following is true: Great supply of opportunities for sex means the value of any given opportunity to have sex is lower. Becau…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/24 10:07 AM
1

Meeting people in the wild has always been a bit daunting. But no I don’t think it’s changed so much. We are still all human beings with an innate proclivity for social interaction. I think you would be amazed how open people are to striking up a conversation in public.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/24 09:46 AM
7

In online dating sure! Good pictures matter. But overall, male attractiveness is a more complex interplay of looks and charisma.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/23 02:28 AM
23

Pretty simple: Men don't rely on social cues nearly as much as women do to make dating choices. And vice versa, physical attributes aren't as central and critical to women as they are for men. This is all evolutionary biology 101!
/r/PurplePillDebate28/12/23 11:36 PM
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