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SianOiseau Archive

View 6 posts and 2,351 comments by SianOiseau on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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0

Well, most flat-earthers probably won't get over their delusion and it might be the same with incels, but I hold hope for guys like this. People can get better.
/r/AllPillDebate09/11/23 08:14 PM
0

This subreddit has a wide representation of incel community and there are dedicated forums to it. Incels have their own lingo as well.
/r/AllPillDebate09/11/23 08:13 PM
5

Lower IQ is a positive indicator of having higher n-count both for men and women, at least partially because they struggle with delayed gratification. But I'm not sure what IQ has to do with my comment in the first place. High IQ doesn't mean you necessarily have your shit together.
/r/AllPillDebate09/11/23 08:13 PM
3

Because it's a crab bucket. It would be different if you tried to help each other, but from what I've seen it's just the way to get further in your despair.
/r/AllPillDebate09/11/23 08:12 PM
1

I have no idea what you're talking about tbh.
/r/AllPillDebate09/11/23 08:11 PM
0

Whether it will or not, it will help them to leave incel communities which is a win in itself.
/r/AllPillDebate09/11/23 08:06 PM
-2

No, I mean general adulting and taking care of your mental health.
/r/AllPillDebate09/11/23 08:03 PM
-1

No, you didn't get my point - if they manage to get their shit together...they most likely will be over the blackpill overall or at least over incels communities and their vitriol.
/r/AllPillDebate09/11/23 08:02 PM
2

A lot of men wouldn't be here if they could do the first point in the first place.
/r/AllPillDebate09/11/23 07:28 PM
5

Reread my question - that's now what I've asked. I asked specifically where good men are in the other user's view. I do not experience any lack of them, I was curious to see his response as we were having a discussion. Blackpillers are hardly good partners to date. You might claim they were good prior they got blackpilled, but if a person falls for internet scam that deep, there's some underlying issue within them.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/23 07:23 PM
3

The SIPP is a large-scale sample survey of the civilian, noninstitutionalized population of the United States fielded by the U.S. Census. SIPP data requires specialized software and weighting to account for the fact that it uses a multistage stratified sample of the U.S., but when analyzed correctly gives information for a representative sample of the U.S. population, so these results apply to the U.S. as a whole. To do the analysis, I matched husbands and wives who were married and living toget…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/23 07:04 PM
5

Yeah, church isn't a good answer here. There are enough assholes in church and I'm not religious. A good partner is someone who treats you well. I'm not sure you can point at a certain subculture or place and say "hey, there are a lot of good partners", it's something you have to vet for. I can give some common traits among women I know who treat their partners well - they're from middle-higher middle social class, educated, generally do not have "messy dating life", they usually have good relat…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/23 07:01 PM
1

I think almost half of marriage now have either partners with similar income or a woman outearning her partner, so it isn't that rare.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/23 06:50 PM
5

I'm sorry, what do your rumblings have anything to do with my comment?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/23 06:47 PM
4

See, it's very contextual. Why do you expect I could provide a precise answer to a rather general question?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/23 06:46 PM
7

There's another study: https://muse.jhu.edu/article/630326/pdf Showing that higher earning wives do not have higher divorce rates, but it's an older one. The ifs one seems to be...an article and not a study though, is there anything more to read on it? I wonder whether they controlled for unemployment. Husbands' unemployment can rise their risks of divorce, but I'd argue that unemployment is very different to just earning less.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/23 06:45 PM
1

Well, where are good men in your view?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/23 06:37 PM
2

...out there? Some are in relationships, some are seeking, some prefer to stay single.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/23 06:32 PM
0

We probably disagree on the ratio of good to bad partners among women, but I'm not sure how we could qualify that objectively.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/23 06:13 PM
2

Why would I go on a date with someone who I felt zero attraction to? I waited for some time and went out with a guy who I did feel interest to.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/23 06:13 PM
2

Sure, you don't get to know each other to the level where you can trust them fully, but it helps to avoid taken men, men with messy dating history etc. When you know people who know this person, they can warn you if something is off. I met my husband in university - we'd hanged out in a group before, I'd seen him interacting with other people and generally there was nothing "off" about him.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/23 06:11 PM
4

It's the same with men asking where all the good women are - the people asking should take a look at their dating life. There are enough good partners of both genders, if you keep dating shit, maybe you should stop being a fly.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/23 06:00 PM
3

I'm a clinger, so when we're sleeping I get as close to my husband as I can. But I also heat up when I sleep so he gets too hot from me body warmth and he tries to move...I get cold and move closer and so far and so on until he doesn't have any space to go and the rest of the bed is behind my back lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/23 05:58 PM
1

It's not that men tend to lose more - it's a higher-earning partner tends to lose more. It's more often men though, but it's not that higher-earning women get spared.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/23 05:56 PM
2

People are forced to be more pragmatic later on the road, but it works both ways. Whatever men here say - a lot of men do not want to marry or date a woman who will be heavily financially dependent on them or who doesn't have her shit together and can't take care of herself and her close ones.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/23 03:50 PM
2

Sure? I'm not sure what it has to do with my comment.
/r/AllPillDebate09/11/23 03:50 PM
3

Not really. It lets you to have an idea about a person's life before you even go out with them and it's easier to avoid cheaters, married men etc. I've never dated casually, so it's not that I've needed a huge number of people to go out with. This sub is notorious about downvoting, don't pay it any attention.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/23 01:46 PM
2

I can feel any romantic attraction only to people I know somewhat and have emotional connection with. So cold approaching is just a waste of time for me. You also keep missing the difference between getting to know someone and asking them out immediately you introduced yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/11/23 01:44 PM
2

As I've said it really depends on your social circle. If you do significantly less than most people around you, it might be an issue and I understand why you feel like you're falling behind. But most people around you make around the same amount or less and they still date, your issue is probably something else.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/23 11:07 PM
7

It depends on your place of living and social circle, but I really doubt your dating issues are tied to finance. There are lots of men who make far less than you do and who still date.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/23 11:04 PM
6

It's a mix of things. Social changes take time to get hold. Yeah, women have been financially independent for some time, it doesn't mean there wasn't the pressure both on men and women to pursue long-term relationships, marriage and to have kids sooner or later. Social medias have affected our society a lot and now we have first generations of people raised on social medias and struggling with real life social interactions. Further individualization and alienization of society - we have less com…
/r/AllPillDebate08/11/23 11:03 PM
0

I could deal with temporary unemployment or low income as long as it was, well, temporary. If we're talking about some "permanent" situation, I wouldn't date a man who was making significantly lower than average for the city I'm living in. I want to have kids, most likely I'll have to help my mother and some relatives in the future - realistically I cannot support a whole family on my own at least on an acceptable for me level of comfort. So around 60k would be a low cut I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/23 10:56 PM
11

I'll repost my old comment. It depends on the context. My husband makes less money than I do and there were periods of time when he was unemployed. I'm fine with it. I value him for more than money and if I had to choose between him having extremely long hours and not seeing me that often and him having a nice office job with less hours but lower salary too, I'd pick the latter without any doubts. It gets a bit tricky if I had to date now though. My husband and I met as teens, we both were broke…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/23 09:57 PM
–

I'm being charitable here hoping that some edgy male users here are teens. But on a serious note - there have been at least several men around 17-19.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/23 05:58 PM
3

There's a scale of "strangeness". A man who approached you on the street - a total stranger. You friend's friend who you met before he asked you out - an acquittance. Going out with your colleague or person you're studying with is safer too.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/23 05:57 PM
–

Nah, male and female teens are somewhat alike here, both groups are trying to be edgy.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/23 04:15 PM
–

No, it's one thing to find delusional takes amusing and another to see suicidal people trying to threaten strangers with their suicide.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/23 04:02 PM
–

She's a teenager and shouldn't be here in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/23 04:02 PM
1

People are judgmental by nature, it isn't really the question of reason imv.
/r/AllPillDebate08/11/23 03:33 PM
1

Well, as I've said - people are entitled to their preferences. Others still can judge them for it, you see both men and women judged for theirs, but in the end of the day you can't be forced to date someone you don't like, so it's on you to stick to your preferences and standards.
/r/AllPillDebate08/11/23 03:29 PM
–

Btw, are you the same user who has been creating alts with the same request "find/give me a gf or I'll kill myself"? I chatted with him and he demanded my personal info at some point, the way you're writing is really similar to his.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/11/23 03:07 PM
1

It does depend on one's reasoning for having this preference, sure. There are enough people who think that sex makes women dirty...but they don't mind making women dirty themselves. Or that casual sex/premarital sex is morally wrong, but they engage into it themselves. As I've said - most men here have issues with dating as it is. Realistically I don't think they'd hold on to standards that are hard to fulfil if they got a gf.
/r/AllPillDebate08/11/23 03:04 PM
-2

More intelligent people might be more cautious around sex and have more stable relationships, hence less partners.
/r/AllPillDebate08/11/23 02:46 PM
1

Most men here struggle with dating as it, putting filters that are not really realistic for your age group doesn't help. If you believe that premarital sex is morally wrong, you shouldn't engage into it.
/r/AllPillDebate08/11/23 02:42 PM
–

Have never had casual. I think being on a similar level is the most comfortable position - neither partner has a reason to be insecure.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/23 11:24 PM
–

Tyrannical regime and national generational trauma.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/23 11:23 PM
–

Today this guy is angry about...normal bodily feature? Nothing new.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/23 11:22 PM
–

What do you mean by "socially taken care of"? There's a reason why women prefer to go out with their friends and women tend to look out for each other. There's also a reason for women to be mindful about their drinks and not letting their glasses just stand without anyone watching them.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/23 11:21 PM
3

The standards are...pretty similar, no? Both men and women's standards for being "instagramm" pretty aren't realistic and achieved mostly by genetics and filters.
/r/AllPillDebate07/11/23 11:19 PM
4

I know a few families like that - some are fine, some are struggling due to dysfunctionality of one/both partners. Overall I wouldn't say it's much different to issues of a gender reversed situations. A partner earning more can feel underappreciated, being used for money and bitterness about their spouse's lower income if they don't make enough for their lifestyle and the partner making less often feels inadequate and not always copes with it in a healthy way. Content couples generally view thei…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/23 09:57 PM
2

When you go to a person to greet and introduce yourself because you gonna spend a lot of time together doing something, that's not cold approaching. Cold approaching is approaching a stranger to flirt with them and ask them out. Do you see the difference? I have a few friends from the uni and I know a few couples that started out there. A lot of people dated partners outside of our university though and all my cousins have met their husbands not in a college.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/23 06:10 PM
2

I met my husband at college and he went volunteering with me in an animal shelter. I wouldn't advise DND or broad games as they tend to have more men than women, but you could try animal shelters, dance/drawing/cooking/photography/pottery classes and language courses. All language courses I've attended and taught had mostly women and quite a lot of young women as well. The caveat you don't go to their places just to date - you expand your social circle. Trying to hit on every woman during a clas…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/23 05:47 PM
2

The OP complains about expectations put on men to perform - men can stop performing if they wish so. Just as women can do the same.
/r/AllPillDebate07/11/23 05:32 PM
2

So can men.
/r/AllPillDebate07/11/23 05:10 PM
1

There are, you just don't see them as expectations because you think they're justified. There's a general expectation put on people (both men and women) to satisfy their partner, but some take it to an extreme and disregard their partner's well-being and pleasure in the process. An expectation put on women is to take care of contraception. Some men feel they shouldn't need to wear condoms when women can take pills, but they have no idea about all side effects from hormonal contraception.
/r/AllPillDebate07/11/23 04:05 PM
-1

Men and women's sexuality works somewhat differently. Men have higher libido and find more women sexually attractive, they will always look at other women. Women have lower libido and it's mostly reactive. We just have to deal with it. See, you expect things and even when I haven't said anything about "bj appointment" or "can't shave", but just pointed out that there's pressure and expectations on women, you get ballistic.
/r/AllPillDebate07/11/23 02:53 PM
4

To put it short - it's okay. You're entitled to your standards as long as you're fine with staying single forever. Some people will be angry, but there are always people displeased with something. I'm not going to engage with your further if you keep using insults btw.
/r/AllPillDebate07/11/23 01:45 PM
2

Men expect women to give bj and some are very insistent about anal. Certain men expect women to have sex even when they aren't in the mood and for a lot of men the idea of "creating a mood" is ridiculous because they're always ready to go. Doesn't work like this for a lot of women. Some more sane criticism towards women is that they sometimes don't know what they like, they don't communicate enough, they don't show their men what they like etc. Starfishing, bad bj, not being pretty enough or hav…
/r/AllPillDebate07/11/23 01:43 PM
-1

Nah, if you're okay with staying single, it's okay. You might be a hypocrite if you aren't a virgin yourself and it can be not realistic for your situation, but it's still okay as long as you're fine with staying single forever.
/r/AllPillDebate07/11/23 01:40 PM
2

Volunteering, interests/hobby groups - places where you go regularly not just to meet people.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/23 01:35 PM
0

Totally normal for teens.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/23 02:56 AM
5

None, but I guess you'll say that "you're a woman". My husband was very straightforward too though. He left his gf before he even approached me, he asked me out and then started calling me his girlfriend everywhere lol. He'd call and text me every evening even if we went out the same day. It didn't take a long time to start talking about some traumatic events in our lives...basically get did the opposite of TRP. Sure, his goal wasn't to sleep around, so it isn't the way to go if you just want se…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/11/23 02:46 AM
6

Same deal with me. Not being receptive to cold approaching doesn't mean you never talk to strangers - you get to know people you work/study with, you meet new people through your friends or relatives, you go to social events and meet people there etc. You don't go on a date with a person you've just met.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/23 10:45 PM
10

No, not really. I'd never date a stranger, so it isn't something practical and it isn't as validating as it can seem. It's mostly uncomfortable, sometimes annoying or concerning.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/23 09:50 PM
–

Have a good day, penis-haver.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/23 06:53 PM
–

I try to stick to unsweetened.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/23 06:48 PM
–

What soy milk do you prefer?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/23 06:47 PM
–

People have decided to call this plant-based liquid milk and I'm fine with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/23 06:47 PM
8

Considering that both marriage and divorce rates go down, I'd assume that there will be less married couples, but the ones who do marry will have longer-lasting marriages. I think if you take your time and marry a person who you are well compatible with, you have better chances for a fulfilling long-lasting marriage compared to couples who were rushed into marriage because they didn't really have much choice or were afraid to be the last in the stock.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/23 05:44 PM
–

Nope, it gives me cramps + acne.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/23 05:11 PM
–

Almonds take too much water to grow unfortunately.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/23 05:10 PM
–

Working out helps to feel better, so it isn't just for keeping fit.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/23 05:07 PM
–

I've read that cashew milk is the kind of non-dairy milk, but I don't really like the taste. Oat milk is better. Although, yeah, cashew milk has a milder taste.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/23 05:05 PM
1

Insults are largely legal.
/r/AllPillDebate06/11/23 01:46 PM
1

Lots of people still do it.
/r/AllPillDebate06/11/23 01:37 PM
8

Collins dictionary: If you describe someone as clingy, you mean that they become very attached to people and depend on them too much. An adult is supposed to be able to take care of themselves and do not rely on their partner to the degree they are not capable of having their own life.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/23 02:27 AM
1

We've discussed it. From one hand, men are expected to be more stoic, from the other, women are considered more emotional/irrational hence their worries and concerns can be dismissed.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/11/23 02:25 AM
1

So people do insult women online all the time.
/r/AllPillDebate06/11/23 02:24 AM
2

People want to marry compatible partners, not someone who wants to fill a role of a wife/husband with them so they'd have to force themselves to play a character foreign to them. I'm not traditional and got married pretty early just because I got lucky and met a compatible partner as a teen. Sure, we both had to grow and change certain things, but fundamental values and traits are the same and we accept them. If he wanted to make me a trad SAHM, we wouldn't work out.
/r/AllPillDebate05/11/23 05:41 PM
1

Sorry?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/23 04:03 PM
1

Internet can be largely anonymous and inside one's friends group people often joke morbid and not "socially accepted" jokes and insult others.
/r/AllPillDebate05/11/23 04:03 PM
2

I'm not sure it's really gendered - it's a pretty common complain from women as well. There's no point in communicating when the other party isn't interested either listening or improving the situation.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/23 04:02 PM
1

No, it's still her responsibility to express her needs and listen to his. Just as it works the same vice versa. My point was more about how even when we try to do so, we don't always succeed and it's okay. It's learning.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/23 03:26 PM
11

It's a bit confusing, but I'd guess it's a lack of efforts one put in their marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/11/23 12:14 AM
7

There are similar studies with similar results. I have some saved somewhere and if I find it, I'll link it too.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/23 11:42 PM
–

Good to hear that, it's important to have at least some positive examples in your life.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/23 11:41 PM
–

Sorry to hear that. What are your relationships with your female relatives?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/23 11:32 PM
–

I'm really glad you got better.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/23 11:31 PM
–

Dude, do you think pissing is helpful? Also considering there are 3.95 billion of women in the world 0.1% out of this number is 3950000. That's a lot of piss to take.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/23 11:30 PM
–

My point was to bring some positive about men and women interacting in a platonic way, but it clearly goes against the grain with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/23 11:29 PM
–

What's wrong with the thread?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/23 11:14 PM
–

I'm sorry for them and I can see how it can make one rather...hostile towards the other gender. I wonder whether reading about more positive experience could be helpful for them if they can get over being suspicious or jealous.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/23 11:14 PM
10

So do I. It saves time!
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/23 11:12 PM
–

There was a very heart-warming thread on askMen about platonic female friends. Men talked how they got supported, listened to, cheered up, helped when they had suicidal plans, got gifts and company, food, hand-made gifts etc. PPD men, what is the best thing your female friend has done for you?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/23 10:48 PM
–

Healthy weight or on a leaner side. I like them skinny tbh. So starting from skinny and going to more "male gaze" with more muscle mass. If he has some muscle mass, some fat is fine too as long as it isn't anywhere close to "beer tummy".
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/23 10:23 PM
-1

There are enough people of both genders who insult others - both men and women. There are also enough gendered insults and insults targeting men/women's insecurities...so I'm not sure what your point is. In relationship both partners should be mindful and treat each other well.
/r/AllPillDebate04/11/23 09:51 PM
–

Tbh by "bad body" I assumed someone heavily overweight and that's a deal breaker for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/23 09:48 PM
17

It is kind of amusing tbh.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/23 09:47 PM
17

Your example is an example of rather poor communication on her side. Either she didn't realize the underlying reason for her low libido (it might be health issues, a lack of attraction, stress etc), his help wasn't enough or he made it seem like she "owned" him sex in exchange of his help, but in either case she hasn't expressed herself clearly (and chances are high he hasn't done it either). Improving your communication can be a hard task for both partners and open communication works only if b…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/23 09:42 PM
79

I'll repost my old post again: Most commonly cited divorce reasons: lack of commitment (75%), infidelity (59.6%), too much conflict (57.7%), getting married too young (45.1%), financial problems (36.7%), substance abuse (34.6%), domestic violence (23.5%), health problems (18.2%), lack of support from family (17.3%), religious differences (13.3%), little or not premarital education (13.3). If we look at reasons that were cited by both partners, it's lack of commitment (70%), too much conflict (53…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/23 09:37 PM
–

Never thought you'd use anime gifs. The more you know about people.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/23 09:35 PM
–

B. I'm short myself, so it's not a big deal.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/23 08:32 PM
–

Husband has gone to the gym, so I've made egg-fried rice with garlic shrimps for us to eat when he comes back. But it's already ready, he's not come yet and I'm hungry.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/23 08:31 PM
0

It also doesn't mean that they necessarily have a female perpetrator - so it's pretty much a speculation at this point. No, when we look at the percentages, women who were victimized purely by other women have a lower rate than heterosexual/bi women victimized by men.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/23 05:56 PM
0

Divorce - yes, DV - not exactly. They have the highest victimization rates and 1/3 of the victims was victimized at least by one man. 2/3 had only female perpetrators and in percent there are less of them than bi or heterosexual victims.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/23 04:39 PM
1

I congratulate you on divorcing him. Hope you're doing much better now.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/11/23 04:37 PM
7

I would not take "one family law professional" over the study. Yes, lesbians have higher divorce rates, but they also stereotypically jump into marriage much sooner than other couples, so it might be the reason for it. The reasons cited of adultery and substance abuse by women are also due to men's mental health being ignored or being in a sexless marriage. That's an interesting way although unoriginal to put blame on women. The articles show that rare alimony is in case of short marriages like …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/23 10:59 PM
8

As I've said in the comment - there's no a clear cut who is to blame for divorces, both parties can and do contribute to it.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/23 10:47 PM
36

I'll just copy my post on the topic: There seems to be a strong belief among manospherian men that women are to blame for the high number of divorces these days, as they initiate most of them. They overlook that initiating divorce is different from causing it or they think that women should bear whatever the issue they have within their marriage for the sake of marriage itself. It would be more reasonable to think that both men and women can be at fault for failing their relationships, most like…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/23 06:20 PM
2

Yep. I think if you don't want to provide your partner with legal security, it says a lot about your relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/23 06:10 PM
1

Well, there are women who repeatedly date abusive men or just "fuck boys". Do you think most men are abusive or do pumping and dumping?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/23 06:05 PM
–

I used to drink husband's protein shake which did bring a little bit of a difference, but I lost everything on the road. You might want to look into more calory-dense food as well, like nuts/peanut or almond butter etc. Although if you have any issues with gallbladder I would advise against fatty food.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/23 12:11 AM
–

Do you do yoga? What kind?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/23 12:09 AM
–

I'm eating less than 2000 probably and I do some jumping stuff. Should buy some almond butter just in case.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/23 12:09 AM
–

Nah, it's a shadow of the Russian language for me. Although now I've come up with another word for "crazy" in Russian which is used more casually and is less suspicious. I think saying that she was abusive and mentally ill is fair and gives more description than "crazy".
/r/PurplePillDebate02/11/23 12:08 AM
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"Crazy" is closer to mentally ill in Russian. Deliriously mentally ill.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 11:40 PM
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I should get another opinion but they were talking about permanent changes.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 11:39 PM
2

Blue pill, left-leaning. I'm not much into politics because it was pretty pointless in my homecountry and I feel that I have to educate myself on this topic. Generally I'm pro help from the state, higher taxes for the rich and big businesses, strong regulations for businesses. Socially I'm pro-choice, pro-LGBTQ+, environmentalist, feminist, egalitarian. So I have pretty strong views on social issues and a lot of of my views on gender relations and sex stem from them. I wouldn't date a man who wa…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 11:39 PM
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Thanks for advice!
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 11:33 PM
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Fine by me.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 11:33 PM
–

Does yoga really help with it? I thought it was more about scratching.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 11:33 PM
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I had an eye procedure and the doctor said I shouldn't really do heavy lifting. I asked about the max weight and they said 10 kg but I think it's "out of the air" number.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 11:32 PM
–

Do 15-20 minutes really burn a lot of calories?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 11:29 PM
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Can I use my own weight to a degree?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 11:28 PM
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Very basic, but I don't really post photos online. Like 1 in 10 years.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 11:28 PM
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Just get a bit more toned.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 11:12 PM
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Don't have any equipment here and I was advised against lifting anything heavier than 10 kilo.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 11:11 PM
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I'm trying, but I'm more curious about getting more toned.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 10:54 PM
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I'm not trying to lose any weight.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 10:54 PM
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If I do some cardio 15-20 minutes a day, will it bring any visual changes? I'm underweight.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 10:51 PM
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Red flag. If all his exes are crazy - "let him free", you don't want either to be labeled as his other crazy ex, deal with his crazy exes or get cheated on because he's clearly attracted to crazy women. I could deal with 1-2 bad exes, but probably not crazy ones. But this adjective is rather extreme in Russian.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 10:20 PM
4

Agree. On a practical level getting married after you've been living together for years doesn't really change anything. I can't relate to the religious part as I'm not really religious myself. I was raised Buddhist and Buddhism is extremely chill about marriage and gender relations (besides sexual relationships being advised against lol).
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 10:17 PM
6

On an individual level neither men or women need the other gender. They can live without sex or romantic relationships at least in the context of living in a functioning society. There seem to be far more vocal needy men though who complain and claim that their lives are not complete without a woman and that they have no motivation to do or achieve anything because they don't have a partner. You might want to argue with them more than with women.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 09:50 PM
5

It's cool and more women should try it out. They also should be careful with who they pick and they should know that approaching or asking out doesn't mean they have to have sex soon.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 06:29 PM
21

I think "commit" can mean "having exclusive relationship". It doesn't have to be marriage. Marriage itself is more about confirming the committment and a legal way to make the state see you as one family unit - with all advantages and disadvantages of it. My husband and I married because it made sense to us - we'd been living together for a few years, we were planning to move to another city together and potentially get a mortgage together. We're together, because we love each other and we make …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 05:22 PM
1

I wanna bring this up but he claims he’s still emotionally dealing with finally accepting that he’s been controlling, financially/emotionally/physically abusive, and used sexual coercion to get what he wanted since our kid was 2 months old. Divorce and the sooner the better. He will NOT learn or change his ways, in fact, he keeps gaslighting her into putting his needs over hers. Fuck him and I hope she has a job.
/r/AllPillDebate01/11/23 01:52 PM
1

"it's over/it's never started/cope/r*pe/-max" etc.
/r/AllPillDebate01/11/23 01:43 PM
10

People are molded by their social media. There is content for tradcons/conservatives and whatnot. The majority of people don't read much besides their social media scrolling. In general is a good caveat - I'm from Russia and from an Asian region. Pretty coderivative background outside of my close family, but I'm liberal and far more liberal than my relatives.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 02:58 AM
46

Or maybe people should date and seek partners compatible to them. It's not wonder that conservatives have better time dating other conservatives and vice versa.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 01:23 AM
3

These men are a minority of men and they date a minority of women. If you're mostly surrounded by men and women like that, I think it's the issue of your social circle and maybe your social surrounding overall. This behavior is more common in certain communities.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 12:52 AM
6

You do not question it - you just hate them. Hating and questioning are 2 different things. You have to take a look at what kind of people you hang out or attract. It might be your social circle or a broader issue. For example, if I stayed in a village where I grew up, I'd have pretty screwed view on men and women as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 12:51 AM
3

I think it was this study. Note that they have a mixed sample and I can't find a part comparing the genders.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/11/23 12:49 AM
3

No.
/r/AllPillDebate31/10/23 09:39 PM
14

Men go for female bullies as much as women go for male bullies. Like attracts like.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/23 09:37 PM
9

Answering your question - there was a study showing that school bullies of both genders tend to have higher n-count than non-bullies. From what I've seen in real life they often tend to date simile partners or partners with very poor self-esteem and no boundaries. It does not mean that the majority of men or women are attracted to bullies.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/23 09:14 PM
2

It's ironic coming from incels who all use the same lingo.
/r/AllPillDebate31/10/23 08:05 PM
1

Maybe around 40%? Sometimes the percent is higher, sometimes it's lower. I can just ask whether he wants to fuck or I can deep kiss him or flaunt in front of him half naked. In the morning it can be just intense cuddling. Whatever it is, it works as a charm. It isn't 50/50 because sometimes I just don't have time to initiate - when the moment is right he's often the first one to "lit the candle". If he stopped initiating, I'd ask if something was wrong, but we wouldn't be on a dry streak.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/23 07:58 PM
29

It's curious that you question women's behavior and not behavior of men who have been bullying you. No, not all men are evil and will bully or mock you. These guys have never grown up, they peaked at high school and not they're trying hard to recreate the experience. They're insecure in their masculinity and themselves - otherwise they wouldn't need to mock others to show off. There are men who do not behave this way and who do not need this kind of act to make people listen to them. You might w…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/23 07:55 PM
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https://www.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/17abzpm/i_believe_men_struggle_so_much_in_dating_because/
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/23 05:37 PM
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We do, I'm not sure why you don't see it.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/23 05:17 PM
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Beards if they can grow them. I'm not sure that this amount of countering will look good in real life though - most likely it will be very noticeable.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/23 04:59 PM
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I think it tells more about his social circle than about women in general. The same is true in reverse too.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/23 02:54 PM
1

Women have much higher chances to be approached. Still you have to meet people, put yourself out there etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/23 02:47 PM
5

Trauma bonding doesn't necessarily mean love. Two people who had pretty normal lives with regular problems and issues can meet, fall in love and then develop love out of it. Two teens can meet, fall in love and grow into love with time. Love is about dedication and friendship built over time, these things do not require some extraordinary hardships to flourish.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/23 02:00 PM
2

Sorry you're going through it. I am not sure what kind of help you could get though. Dating is something you learn on practice, other people can't really teach you that.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/23 01:57 PM
3

Dating issues do not end on finding a partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/23 01:56 PM
1

If you don't talk much and keep to yourself, there are not that many chances others will put efforts into getting to know you.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/23 01:51 PM
3

You're enough for yourself and you're comfortable with yourself, it's great. It doesn't necessarily make you enough for other people though.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/23 01:50 PM
3

Society is profressive-ish in terms of women's gender role, but it doesn't come with certain disadvantages as well. You're expected to juggle work and family life while doing more chores and childcare than your partner. I'd say the push for normalizing sex work in harming women long-term, but I know a lot of people would disagree here and I go against the current feminism wave.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/23 01:47 PM
3

It depends on a platform. Women often get advised to take a step back, get a break from relationships, go on therapy etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/23 01:43 PM
6

There are enough disadvantages for both genders. Men still work longer hours while women spend more time on chores and childcare, sex is expected to happen sooner than later and a lot of women feel pressured to "hurry up" in this regard, men generally expect far more in terms of sex than they used due to porn normalizing certain sex acts etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 10:22 PM
8

A woman who struggles with relationships has to work on herself as well. Just thinking that you're enough isn't really enough, you need to figure out what your issue is.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 10:20 PM
5

I think most couples have a mix of beliefs and few are strictly egalitarian or traditional, which fits the current transitioning time.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 09:28 PM
5

Not to be rude, but if you struggle with finding a partner, why do you think you should enough as you are?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 09:09 PM
11

There's quite a lot of content about how it's women's fault that men aren't manly enough and how to strive a man needs a traditional/submissive/feminine woman. Outside of online content there are enough men who feel more masculine/secure/fulfilled in relationships and they expect to be treated in a certain way in order to "feel like a man". I don't get either things tbh. I'm a woman because I have this body and I was raised this way. I don't need a man to validate me being a woman nor I feel the…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 08:54 PM
11

Yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 04:23 PM
27

...I have male friends? I'm friends with them because I like their company and enjoy spending time with them, not because I am or was looking for a husband. I'm not a big fan of "energy" thing, I like pretty much the same things in my male friends that I like in female friends - shared sense of humor, being an interesting conversationalist, having common hobbies and interests, the ability to be open, caring and genuine in relationships etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 03:55 PM
4

/r/AllPillDebate30/10/23 01:50 PM
11

That's not really what disinterest means. Wanting ill on someone is pretty much being interested...in a bad way.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 01:37 PM
20

Do you think being disinterested equates to hate?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 01:37 PM
1

Most statistics show lower risks of sexual assaults. What's the question?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 12:37 PM
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I have no idea what it is, but going from the name I assumed it has some waffles lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 01:54 AM
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The best place is something cozy, romantic and quiet enough to talk. Fast food chains generally do not fit either of the points.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 01:54 AM
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From the list - I think coffee/ice cream dates, bowling, movie theaters and sport events if you're into them are perfectly fine. But I'm not from the US, so I might be missing some context with the names of food chains. Assuming they're all about fast food, that would be a no from me. I'd offer something else.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 01:53 AM
0

There are not enough bodypositivity-related resources for men and it's seen as more acceptable to shame men in this context, I agree. I've been seeing more voices speaking against it, so I hope it'll change in foreseeable future. On another note, even though bodypositivity for women is pretty popular and widely accepted, there are still lots of negative content and comments about women's bodies. Anonymity brings the worst in people and social medias have been only making it worse.
/r/AllPillDebate30/10/23 01:51 AM
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I don't get what is wrong with coffee dates tbh. It might be stereotypical, but it doesn't mean it's bad.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 01:51 AM
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Yeah, I don't get why people would want to have a date in a fast food chain. Just...why?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 01:50 AM
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I'm not well aware about fast food chains, so maybe I miss something. What do you find unreasonable in the list?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 01:05 AM
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Places (some) women refuse to go on a date. Tbh I don't think it's that unreasonable with the exception for coffee/ice cream dates, bowling, a bar just for drinks (if you both drink alcohol and comfortable doing so on the first date), maybe waffle house (have no idea of the quality or ambiance) and sport events depending on one's tastes. Food chains are just...not really romantic. It's okay if you're on a budget and you're teens or if you're both real fans of these places but otherwise it's just…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 12:53 AM
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"About time". Sorry, it wasn't really clear from my first comment lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 12:47 AM
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About time. I really love this movie, the main character is an awkward virgin who a) can take no as an answer, b) is determined in a good way (the woman is clearly interested in him, but due to outside circumstances he had to try again) and c) he's shown to be a great husband, father, son and brother. Also his family is goals and my husband and I always get emotional when we watch it.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 12:38 AM
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Mods got tired from deleting men's comments under Q4Ws.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 12:36 AM
75

I don't think women hate shy or socially awkward people. They just don't gravitate to them or make it any easier for these men to date them. It is not hate though, it's just being...disinterested.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 12:21 AM
0

There's halo effect, but it works for both genders. But there's also the opposite of it - we see hard-working, kind people as prettier than they are.
/r/AllPillDebate30/10/23 12:20 AM
1

There are not enough bodypositivity-related resources for men and it's seen as more acceptable to shame men in this context, I agree. I've been seeing more voices speaking against it, so I hope it'll change in foreseeable future. On another note, even though bodypositivity for women is pretty popular and widely accepted, there are still lots of negative content and comments about women's bodies. Anonymity brings the worst in people and social medias have been only making it worse.
/r/AllPillDebate30/10/23 12:19 AM
4

Not really. I haven't seen a lot of "they go only for jerks" scenarios outside of troubled people dating other trouble people independent of their gender.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/10/23 12:17 AM
0

Who were the women? Where did you meet them?
/r/AllPillDebate29/10/23 08:34 PM
–

I'm glad you've survived your drug intake! How was it?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/23 07:25 PM
–

Not gonna lie I think boys and men trying to create an impression of being "alpha male" online are funnier.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/23 07:25 PM
-3

People think that bodyshaming is okay when the target is a "bad person". Which sucks. They don't realize that this kind of language and insults affect other people sharing these traits. But generally people go for low-hanging insults - it's weight, n-count and being single for women and dicks for men. Also to be fair I've seen a lot of people voicing the same thing during the scandal - bodyshaming isn't okay and it harms others. You shouldn't base your worldview on social medias. Do you know how…
/r/AllPillDebate29/10/23 07:21 PM
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I think it's a strategy (not necessarily conscious) to make women insecure so these men could date these women/better women. Or it's just sour grape.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/23 07:17 PM
0

I'm really curious where you've managed to met so many women discussing small dicks.
/r/AllPillDebate29/10/23 07:16 PM
-5

I don't think the first 2 are normalized. They're pretty common, sure, but a lot of people realize that it's poor taste and it's body shaming which isn't okay for any gender. On the other note, I've never really seen or heard people discussing these things in real life, these are mostly online things. You can easily find insults directed at your social group/ethnicity/gender/mocking some traits you have in social medias, it's part of the reasons why you should filter what content you're consumin…
/r/AllPillDebate29/10/23 06:08 PM
–

Yesterday in a park we overheard some guys discussing another girl walking past as "meh". Husband said they weren't on her level anyway lol. The girl was pretty - tall, sport-ish figure, just no hairstyle or makeup because she was going running. The guys were average but maybe slightly on a shorter side.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/23 06:04 PM
3

Pill communities do have more people on the spectrum. It shouldn't be used as an insult, but it does explain certain behavioral patterns and a vast difference in experience.
/r/AllPillDebate28/10/23 02:14 PM
1

Men have lower risks of getting sexually harassed or assaulted. I do think that women get more help in these situations.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/10/23 01:57 PM
1

You have to seek people who are open to getting to know others. By default most do not care about strangers, but under the right context it might work.
/r/AllPillDebate28/10/23 01:56 PM
1

I'm curious who rages about their personality here.
/r/AllPillDebate27/10/23 01:54 AM
1

I'm not talking about being saints, but about being logically consistent.
/r/AllPillDebate27/10/23 01:53 AM
–

Can you provide a link for your claim? It was quite a long time ago, but the last time I've checked the stats, the difference was rather small, but it might be the conviction rate, so I'm not sure. Talking about female leaders in the past when women generally had less rights than men doesn't show the current situation. If you want to talk about the past, we can talking about men's violence rates in the past as well. Again, can you give me the link? Tbh I haven't seen stats on this specific topic…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/23 07:01 PM
0

Again, you can find someone sexually attractive...and like spending time with them platonically because you like their personality and you have things in common. I'm not sure why you think these things are exclusive.
/r/AllPillDebate26/10/23 06:58 PM
3

Whether being a stay at home parent or not depends on how many kids you have, their ages and their health. If you don't have kids and you're a "stay at home spouse", you have very easy workload, you just cook and clean for 2 people. But if you have a toddler, a newborn and a primary school child, your partner working in an office most likely have it easier. If you have even one child with special needs...yeah, office is probably easier (depending on the condition). Outside of workload I think it…
/r/AllPillDebate26/10/23 05:59 PM
1

It's an example of black pillers being bad at debates and you keep proving my point.
/r/AllPillDebate26/10/23 05:49 PM
1

Change "platonically attractive" to "enjoying their company/lining them platonically". How you like your friends basically.
/r/AllPillDebate26/10/23 05:49 PM
1

If we agree that these things are not exclusive, I think claiming that men have female friends only because they want to bang them is false. Probably few men would refuse from an easy lay with a person whose company they already enjoy, but it doesn't prove that they all have ulterior motives in their friendships. I have a few male friends, but I don't really hang out with them that often, we all live in different parts of the world now. I used to hang out with one of them before, but as he's my …
/r/AllPillDebate26/10/23 05:48 PM
1

It really depends on your definitions of blue, red and black pills. I don't agree with neither black or red pills, so by definition I'm blue. I do think appearance plays an important role in dating though, people should do sport and they have better chances if they hit the gym etc. A lot of things are common sense and black/red don't have author rights on that.
/r/AllPillDebate26/10/23 05:46 PM
2

Do you think "find sexually attractive" and "find platonically attractive" exclude each other?
/r/AllPillDebate26/10/23 04:26 PM
2

Where did I say someone should care about it?
/r/AllPillDebate26/10/23 04:25 PM
1

Do you think insults are morally just?
/r/AllPillDebate26/10/23 04:24 PM
-3

Thanks for providing an example.
/r/AllPillDebate26/10/23 03:46 PM
3

All my male friends have been married for years and have kids. They're also older than I am, so it's more "younger sister - older brother" relationships. As we're all married, your proposal isn't something that I'd risk experimenting with. Also you can have sex or find a person sexually appealing...and be friends without having any sex. Having attraction to a person doesn't mean you don't like them platonically.
/r/AllPillDebate26/10/23 02:58 PM
1

Do you have friends? I have friends of both genders, I've never thought it was a controversial topic. We like each other's company, we share a lot of interests and we just like spending time together. You could call it using each other, but in this sense every human interaction is about "using" each other whether as a mean to get companionship or something else.
/r/AllPillDebate26/10/23 02:53 PM
1

I don't often get any replies with links to studies. Just personal beliefs based on whatever social media content they've been consuming.
/r/AllPillDebate26/10/23 02:50 PM
-7

Well, I can say the reverse. Here I often get insults just for being a woman.
/r/AllPillDebate26/10/23 02:49 PM
-10

It's pretty much the same with blackpillers here. Strawmanning, cherry-picking, sample bias, insults etc.
/r/AllPillDebate26/10/23 01:57 PM
1

Social skills affect how people perceive you. If you can't talk to people, they just have no chances to get to know you.
/r/AllPillDebate26/10/23 01:55 PM
–

As I've said - the caveat here is if you view abortions as murders. I don't. Women abuse kids slightly at higher rates than men which is surprising because women have much more access to children. There are more single mothers, more female teachers, which would lead to much higher abuse rates if basic probability was the same for both genders. I haven't seen any statistics on elderly abuse that was split by genders and there are not enough female leaders to talk about wars in modern times. The U…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/10/23 01:53 PM
–

If he gets matches but can't get a date, the issue is probably in his texting. His main issue is using a dating app though.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/23 10:43 PM
–

It seems there was a rise in abortion rates in 2020, but the overall trend goes downside which is a good thing. When men do what? If men could get pregnant, they could abort their pregnancies too, I'm sorry you're missing out?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/23 10:35 PM
1

Where did you get that statistics? the abortion rate was 11.2 abortions per 1,000 women aged 15–44 years https://www.cdc.gov/reproductivehealth/data_stats/abortion.htm Also the "for people that view abortions as killing" is a major caveat.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/23 08:56 PM
1

I don't think everything has to be reduced to personal choices, we can and we should address these issues on multiple levels - we can push for changes and raise awareness on a scale of society and we can do our best personally. Incels seem to reduce the topic to "it's over, give up" or fantasies about the state falling apart and women "getting what they deserve" and neither approach is productive.
/r/AllPillDebate25/10/23 06:31 PM
–

Not into sport so have no idea what you're talking. Also nowadays spouses can have pretty much the same responsibilities outside of childbirth.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/23 06:01 PM
–

I'm sorry, what?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/23 05:25 PM
1

These things do make a difference for one's dating life. It isn't a fool-proof method, sure, but it gives you better chances. Or rather it's the groundwork that you can base other things on.
/r/AllPillDebate25/10/23 05:25 PM
-2

What's the real reason in your view?
/r/AllPillDebate25/10/23 05:24 PM
–

As I've said - works pretty well for couples I know and for my husband and I.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/23 04:39 PM
1

You should.
/r/AllPillDebate25/10/23 04:38 PM
–

I've seen enough egalitarian relationships working pretty neatly. My own marriage too.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/23 04:36 PM
–

I think you'd be okay with all of it as long as the genders were reversed except for the second maybe.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/23 04:16 PM
–

Your partner can't, shouldn't and most likely doesn't want to be your sole source of companionship and human connection. You need other people in your life that you can reach to and rely on besides your partner. People want to feel special and they want to feel you like and love them. Not that you're desperate to use anyone willing enough to use as a placeholder or a plug for your hole. A lot of people also don't want to feel this kind of pressure on themselves and be your main source of joy. It…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/23 04:13 PM
2

The state of your mental health is a more critical problem than your appearance. You do need therapy, but if you're vehemently against getting professional help you need or it isn't accessible for you right now, you should start with changes you can realistically afford and implement right now. Start with your sleep schedule. Not getting enough sleep sets your brain on fire and makes all issues you're going through much worse and it worsens your spiraling into obsessive thoughts as well. Check y…
/r/AllPillDebate25/10/23 04:05 PM
-9

Take a break from any pill communities and concentrate on aspects of your life that you can change and make better. When you keep consuming content that makes you angry, jealous and hateful, it's no wonder you struggle with these feelings. It's the same as eating hamburgers and drinking coke all the time and complaining that you can't lose weight.
/r/AllPillDebate25/10/23 03:58 PM
1

By "better" I've meant "makes you feel better". Your mental health and well-being depend greatly on things I wrote and, yes, these things are net positive. Do you really want to argue that a good sleep schedule or having friends are not net positive? Most things are contextual and a lot of things in our lives depend on the environment, family, our health etc. It does not mean you have absolutely no power and you cannot improve or make your situation better at all. There are still things that are…
/r/AllPillDebate25/10/23 03:56 PM
1

The vast majority of people probably does have a social circle and they meet people more naturally. But if you struggle with socializing, you have to put extra efforts into it.
/r/AllPillDebate25/10/23 03:52 PM
1

I think both partners should be interesting in romancing and enticing each other. It can become tedious if only one partner is expected to initiate all the time. But I'm not sure I get your first paragraph tbh, can you rephrase it?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/23 03:51 PM
1

Incel community could be of help if you met offline and were actually doing anything else besides...everything you see here.
/r/AllPillDebate25/10/23 02:46 PM
-1

Some people have easier time socializing and connecting with others, just as some people have better mental or physical health. If it isn't true for you, you have to put more efforts.
/r/AllPillDebate25/10/23 01:57 PM
2

We have more different responsibilities, but now at least we can get paid for our work and choose what we do. Imv it's objectively better than having no say in the matter.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/23 01:55 PM
1

The solution would be seek a partner who actively participated in both things, but people seem to fail at it.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/23 01:54 PM
-1

Objectively it does make a difference. Your lifestyle has a great affect on your well-being and being isolated and lonely is bad for your mental health.
/r/AllPillDebate25/10/23 01:53 PM
1

Shitty on her part and isn't worth the time imv.
/r/AllPillDebate25/10/23 01:52 PM
1

Take care of your mental health: sleep, diet, sport and therapy/meds if it's needed. Taking a break from social medias as well. Improve your social skills: initiate small talks as often as you can, talk to people around you and try to listen to them and remember what they're telling you so you could talk again with them etc. Put yourself out there. Go volunteering, go to some meetups, join church, whatever suits you better. In case of autistic spectrum there are therapists working specifically w…
/r/AllPillDebate25/10/23 01:36 AM
1

What's your issue with math?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/10/23 01:28 AM
2

That's icky, yeah.
/r/AllPillDebate25/10/23 01:28 AM
1

I'm using the word similar to the one he used in his post.
/r/AllPillDebate25/10/23 01:27 AM
4

"Don't want to go on a date" != the date was bad. But it's shitty anyway and I'm sorry for the poster. From one hand, she might have not wanted to go out at all. The issue isn't in him rather than she was just not in the mood. From the other hand, if she didn't want to go out with him, I have no idea why she'd agree to. Anyway, people overshare online and we forgot that we do not have to or need to share everything with everyone.
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 10:52 PM
1

Tbh I haven't met any users who claim to have a healthy social life and no mental issues/problems.
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 09:05 PM
1

It's what I've seen from multiple discussions here and that's what is stated in multiple posts and comments.
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 07:54 PM
1

You have it better than a lot of men here, good for you.
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 07:53 PM
-3

Do you want to deny OP's words that he doesn't see "normies" as people? Do you think it's "more humanizing"?
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 07:36 PM
1

It helps a person not be isolated in their online spaces. You get out, go out somewhere together, do things together. Generally have a good time - it's good for your mental health. You have people who care for you and who support you, you have people who you care for and all of it is good for one's life-being.
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 07:05 PM
0

I'm not saying that nothing is true, although some things clearly are false, but most things are heavily exaggerated and from interacting with men here it seems a lot of them are highly isolated - no friends, no people close to them they talk to on a regular basis etc.
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 07:03 PM
1

That...is not enough data to marry someone. Even with arranged marriages people date for some time before they decide to marry or not. People exaggerate their reactions. We say that we could eat a horse, but it's clearly not the reality. You might be surprised, but men don't rush into marriage either. Dating and cohabitating prior marriage helps to see whether you're compatible and can make it work or not. Also the guy is in his 30s, he's clearly taking his time.
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 07:02 PM
0

A lot of them are very isolated and are either have spectrum or some mental health issues that screw with the way they interact with people and the way they see the world. Some of them are also just very young and have already fallen into the blackpill hole. I knew a few men who chronically struggle with dating and even can image some of them posting on platforms like that. They do fit the categories I've listed above - isolated, troubled, have spectrum etc.
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 07:00 PM
-1

As I've said in my other comment - one of the biggest problems in this subreddit is a lack of real life experience. People base their worldview on a snippet of negative experience they have and online content, lots and lots of online content that algorithms give them.
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 06:09 PM
1

Some people settle, sure. Dead bedrooms do not happen to the majority of relationships though and most couples have lots of sex in the beginning of relationships which gets lower with time. It's...normal. Life happens, your body doesn't produce as much hormones as it does in the infatuation stage, you get other priorities. You still have sex regularly and you still find each other attractive, it's just not constant lust. I'm really curious where you see these girls because it isn't something I'v…
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 05:50 PM
-4

u/ropecelling, is this kind of "more humanizing views" you were talking about? Extreme worldviews generally do not help to accept, humanize or be more tolerant towards others.
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 05:43 PM
1

There are high libido women and there are women who get higher libido in the beginning of relationships. There are also couples with relationship issues, health problems, kids that cause lower sex frequency.
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 05:41 PM
1

There are some high libido women out there, but it isn't a given that they'd be compatible in other areas.
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 05:23 PM
2

Depends on his preferences really. If sex frequency isn't something he wants to compromise on, he should seek a partner who has a similar libido.
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 05:11 PM
19

I'm surprised how many people view inherit parts of relationships as tedious chores and things they have to "just go through with". For women it's usually sex, for men it's more often romance, dates and just spending quality time together. I guess they do enjoy other parts of their relationships or they just don't know any better so they put up with it. It probably happens because a) low compatibility, b) viewing relationships as a mean to get something (sex/money/kids/whatever) and c) long-exis…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/23 04:35 PM
–

If you'd counted the replies to my post, you'd have seen that your experience doesn't 100% match the experience of other men. There are men who get help and support from women. Generally there are men who have positive experience with women.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/23 03:54 PM
77

Nope, we have it better than any other generation prior to us. It doesn't mean there aren't any things we should work on or issues with need solve. Moreover, people will always find things to complain about - it's the way our brains work, we tend to notice negative things more easily than positives and it's one of the ways we keep ourselves alive. I wouldn't say that current society is hostile to women. A better word would be toxic and isolating, but it's everyone's issue, not just women. We're …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/23 03:52 PM
–

I'll keep repeating that no, your experience here does not account for all relationships/women out there. There are women who do help, support and share responsibilities with their partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/23 03:34 PM
1

Some pills make you lose libido or make it harder to get an orgasm, but not all of them have these side effects and not all people get this side effect.
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 03:06 PM
0

I usually try to clarify what the other person is talking about instead of making assumptions. But personal attacks and refusal to engage in conversation in response are very common here, so I'm not surprised.
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 03:04 PM
-4

As I've said in my other comment a lack of experience and negative experience do not help to "humanize" another group. How does society dehumanizie incels? Also I'm not complaining here, I'm arguing with the OP's point. It depends on a person. Some have tried their best and failed, some haven't even tried. Sticking to online communities isn't a healthy coping mechanism and most men here would benefit from taking a break from pill communities. What stops incels from having offline friends?
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 02:59 PM
0

I'm talking about the OP's point. No, negative experience and a lack of experience do not help people to better understand another group or "humanize" them.
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 02:55 PM
1

Do you really think most people would be okay marrying a stranger they commented online? When you see comments from men online saying they'd marry this or that girl, do you think that if she just appeared in front of them they would really take her to the courthouse to marry? Attraction is relevant, attraction depends on more things than just appearance and sometimes person's smell/mannerism/voice/the way they talk can kill or create attraction. For marriage there are even more things to conside…
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 02:54 PM
-4

Well, a lack of experience is experience on its own, sure. It doesn't help you to "humanize" another group though. I think one of the biggest issues with discussions here is men's lack of experience of communicating with people in real life - both men and women. Lots of guys seem to be completely isolated and/or they perceive every social situation through their black lens and it's just...destructive for any kind of connection with others.
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 02:37 PM
-4

My main point is that not all women who posted these comments would actually date him beyond the first/second date. Some will, sure, but some won't, because it's hard to estimate attraction without really meeting a person.
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 02:34 PM
-8

Okay, do you think that everything people post online is true and they always behave the same way in real life as they do online?
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 02:09 PM
1

Can you link the stats? I've seen the stats from pew, but the number was lower. Also I'm not sure what I'm wrong about - I was talking about blue-collar workers, not just people in general.
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 02:05 PM
–

Depends on the context. I wouldn't want him to share graphic details of our sex life, but discussing sex/dating is okay-ish. Also public/community discussion is different to chatting with someone privately.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/23 02:03 PM
-18

Different people can have different sexuality. Also these comments do not mean that any of these women would really date this man. To figure out whether they're compatible or not or whether there's any sexual chemistry or not they'd have to meet him in person first.
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 01:57 PM
-7

I'd argue that because incels largely do not have much connections or experience with women, they tend to objectify them more to the point where you think women are completely different to men, they villainize them to the greatest evil in the world and/or they view women primarily as a mean to get what they want - sex/intimacy/validation etc. Another point is that everyone who isn't red or black-pilled is blue-pilled by definition. There are people with lots of different beliefs around genders a…
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 01:55 PM
1

As I've elaborated in my other comment - with the same stats and family as I have now, I'd have low chances of becoming homeless/getting suicidal etc. But I do think that both men and women have issues, neither gender has it good.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/10/23 12:34 PM
3

I don't need to be asked to express my opinion.
/r/AllPillDebate24/10/23 04:22 AM
1

I'm sorry you go through it. What do you do?
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 11:39 PM
2

Yes, but I don't think the OP will get the idea.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/23 10:48 PM
5

There's a difference between changing your mind and lying about your intentions from the beginning. And yes, men (and women) can be manipulative in order to get what they want.
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 10:37 PM
1

Can you give examples of this leading you're talking about? My husband and I are egalitarian and pretty much nothing you're talking about here is applicable to us. We both work, we do chores, no, we do not subscribe to "happy wife happy life", we both can make mistake, admit it and apologize. We make decisions together, neither has to shoulder the load on their own.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/23 10:35 PM
5

The major caveat in OP's logic is that most people do not know about others' dick sizes.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/23 10:04 PM
1

Men still have to initiate more often than not and they're generally expected to pay for dates, although there are women who approach and women who split/share/pay in turns for dates. Outside of religious communities people do not expect a man to ask his partner's parents for permission to marry her or be "the leader", most couples have 2 working partners and in almost half of marriages men are not main/sole breadwinners. Most women are not SAHMs either. There are still more men in politics, but…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/23 10:04 PM
4

Once again, the OP's point is majorly about how other people perceive you. I do think that a lot of men worry about their penis sizes and men who are below average have it harder than men who are above average. It isn't the part I was arguing with.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/23 09:58 PM
2

He talks about people in general. People in general do not care about other people's dicks.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/23 09:43 PM
1

Some people do discuss details like this, but I doubt they use it as their main or major point in forming opinion about something. Also I doubt sharing penis sizes is that common. People can discuss sex without giving too much details.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/23 09:42 PM
1

His point is based on a wrong premise.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/23 09:40 PM
1

That's a lot of text without much substance. Can you give examples of women submitting to men and explain why these examples can't be flipped?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/23 09:26 PM
10

It might surprise you, but most people go around with their lives without thinking on penises of others. I know only my husband's size and I have no reason to be curious, know or judge penises of all other men I know because, well, I'm not going to have sex with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/23 09:24 PM
-1

To be fair these days there are just less blue-collar workers as well. Not sure how it would affect on their dating life.
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 09:21 PM
1

If I remember correctly, divorce rates are higher among couples with lower income. Financial issues are taxing on relationships.
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 09:19 PM
1

Ah, no, sorry, I was talking about the post to whose comment I originally replied. It seems he thinks that only physically demanding jobs are "REAL", so I wonder how many incels perform this kind of jobs in the first place.
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 09:18 PM
1

I think I haven't expressed myself clearly - the OP talks about jobs being real and it seems he thinks that only physically demanding jobs are real or only jobs that are stereotypically male jobs. I'm curious how many incels hold physically taxing occupations.
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 09:17 PM
-13

It's a common stereotype that blue-collar men do not struggle with dating. Tbh I don't know any man performing some physically hard labor that is also chronically single. But personal experience is very limiting and I don't think there's any stats on the topic.
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 07:56 PM
1

Ah, got it. I think NEETs are overrepresented in incels communities, but I doubt that the majority of incels don't have any job, they do have to live somewhere and eat something. But my main point was that if the OP puts very strong filters on what a REAL job is, the majority of incels probably don't have a real job by his own standards either.
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 07:53 PM
1

What occupation do you prefer more?
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 07:52 PM
1

Well, I don't have much besides personal experience. I don't think there's much statistics on incels and the last poll about one's occupation didn't get much traction. It's reasonable to think that NEETs are overrepresented among incels at least according to their own words, but the majority has to work.
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 07:52 PM
-6

From what I've read it doesn't seem that there are a lot of incels performing hard labor jobs. There are some with low-paying jobs but no plumbers/electricians etc.
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 06:59 PM
-15

I wonder whether there's any difference between the 2 groups.
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 06:58 PM
1

I guess your parents were farmers? Mother and father?
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 06:56 PM
-2

Can you elaborate?
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 06:54 PM
-25

I'm always curious how many incels do have these REAL jobs they're talking about. From what I've seen blue-collared men do not struggle with dating, they have partners and families.
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 06:15 PM
-1

You can always stay single and quite often it's a better option.
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 06:14 PM
0

You cannot date a person who refuses to date you, so yeah, everyone chooses.
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 06:06 PM
1

It's interesting to see some men here claim that men have no power, no authority and no choice in their relationships with women and then see a man claiming that women submit to men everyday. Answering your question - some do, but all of these things are not black and white, there's gradation. A woman from a 3d country has far less resources to help herself if she gets abused by her spouse.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/23 06:05 PM
5

If you don't want to and you still can provide the basics for yourself, it's fine. The current system doesn't really work for a lot of people and maybe "silent protests" will do something in the long run, although I really doubt it. I'd still advise to find things you enjoy and seek some offline community to keep connections with people. Humans are social creatures, we need to feel as a part of community.
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 05:24 PM
6

I'm really curious why he decided to do the test 24 years later. I feel sorry both for him and his son, it's an awful situation to be in and I wouldn't wish it on anyone.
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 05:07 PM
-1

I really doubt that 90% of women you know personally have done what you're describing unless you have a very peculiar social circle. The average n-count both for men and women is still pretty low.
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 05:05 PM
0

The group that experiences issues has to push for the change. You can't force women to be better partners, but you can choose who you date. It works the other way as well. I do think women should initiate more and split the costs of dates, that's what I did, but I can't make all other women do the same.
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 05:05 PM
1

I'm explaining that it isn't something I feel defensive about or something I feel the need to lie about - I'm an observer in this situation and I don't really see what you're describing in my social circle. That's why I'm asking what kind of women you're talking about. Are these women you know personally?
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 04:46 PM
-2

Don't make it personal. This whole situation isn't something I have first-hand experience or even something I've witnessed in real life.
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 04:42 PM
1

What kind of women are you talking about? Are they your friends/family? I don't have any personal ground here considering I've never even had casual sex. I'm talking about what I see around me though and it's vastly different to what you're describing.
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 04:40 PM
-1

Well, men should stop dating these women. Complaining alone won't solve much.
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 04:16 PM
-4

Courtship exists in religious societies, but secular people usually engage in "dating" and "getting to know each other". We usually do not call it courtship. The obsession with Chad treatment is interesting. I think that a) yes, some men get casual sex easier because of their appearance and demeanor, it doesn't necessarily mean these men are assholes, some of them are great men that are pleasant to spend time with and b) it's very contextual. Some people will have sex the first night because the…
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 04:15 PM
3

Yep. I view sex as something that you shouldn't buy or sell, but share with a person you're in love with or at least feel strong physical attraction to. Monetizing it kills libido.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/23 03:00 PM
2

Good, it gets boring after a day.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/23 02:58 PM
3

I wouldn't want to have kids with a man who had to pay me to sleep with him, the idea itself disgusts me.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/23 02:55 PM
-13

What courtship are you talking about and what's demeaning about it?
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 02:54 PM
3

I think people should choose for themselves. I think this kind of relationships has too many red flags and it isn't something I'd engage in. But I can see that unfortunately for some women it's one of few chances to get out of the situation they're in. It's depressing, but it is what it is.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/23 02:49 PM
1

Well, incels are significant enough threat for the state to keep the watch on them. Indoctrination of the youth is another worrying factor.
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 01:50 PM
0

The rate is different.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/23 01:47 PM
4

If I get the same stats as I have now, I'd have pretty low chances of becoming homeless, jailed or suicidal. The risk of getting drafted is real though, but it's less certain than getting pregnant and having to go through birth if you want to have biological children. To clarify I don't think either gender has it good. We all have our own issues.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/23 01:47 PM
4

Men have lower risks, but they also get less help if they do get sexually assaulted. It's the deal I'd take over having higher risks and more help in case it does happen. Neither is ideal of course.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/23 01:44 PM
7

It creates a fertile ground for abuse and mistreatment in general. Not all couples with imbalanced power have these things, but seeking this type of relationship intentionally can indicate that a person is seeking someone vulnerable to abuse.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/23 01:43 PM
1

I'm curious what the stereotype it is.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/10/23 01:42 PM
6

Crime rates have been all time low and women have the most opportunities compared to the times before. What are you talking about? Btw this is kind of attitude people are talking about when they call incels violence and say that incels should be on the watch.
/r/AllPillDebate23/10/23 12:41 AM
5

I've never had casual sex so I can't share any personal experience here, but I think women who do use this strategy want to confirm to a more traditional and still very common worldview of women sleeping early with a man being too easy and not worthy of long-term relationships. You can see it as being insecure or manipulative, but it is a result of slut-shaming and men parroting the idea that a woman shouldn't "spread her legs too easily".
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/23 11:40 PM
16

Pursuing relationship dynamic where you have all the power and your partner depends on you for multiple reasons is...concerning, but you can date abroad without having weird power play and I don't think that going abroad to date is inherently bad. I'm also from a country that is somewhat known for its "brides" and I find the idea of looking for a woman from a foreign and more traditional culture without getting to know this culture and living in this country for awhile rather naïve and potential…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/23 11:38 PM
20

There are 2 possibilities: These women do not want to have an LTR. You are not a good option for an LTR. Good enough for sex, not good enough for relationships. Most likely it's the mix of the 2. Some are not interested in LTRs at the moment and some don't see dating you long-term. I'm from the "annoying women making men wait for sex", because I need time to feel attraction and feel secure with a person. There's nothing really I can do about it, but from what I've read most women are not demi an…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/23 11:33 PM
10

That's a tradeoff, sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/23 11:29 PM
2

You must have missed gimpgirl on PPD then and multiple arguments between PPD women and her. There's also lacuty woman or smth, although I think it's a man larping. I've been debating with a woman today and, well, I'm a woman myself and I've also argued with the OP of "men bring nothing to the table" and generally I manage to get into debates with women pretty often, the difference is that they usually stay civil and we can find a common ground. Having said that and to address your main point, no…
/r/AllPillDebate22/10/23 10:18 PM
9

Testicles do no bleed or cramp each month.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/23 10:06 PM
24

I think if I have any say for choosing the stats for my next life, I could try out living as a man. Most likely I would not want to deal with periods, period pain, pregnancy and giving birth again. It would also save me from attempts of sexual assault and from going through sexual harassment. I do like being a woman though - it's the only experience I know and I've grown close to my current body and the way people perceive me. I have husband who likes me as I am now and who probably would not da…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/23 10:00 PM
-1

You see relationships as a job for men, hence I've asked why you'd want one if you have this attitude. How many men do you know who get FWB like that on a regular basis? I used to know a guy who had no issues getting casual sex, but it usually was ONSs and he wasn't...very happy about some of them. Lol. I see your point, I don't think we should continue that, the delusion is way too deep here. I will say that I've never been able to feel attraction on the spot and have never had casual sex parti…
/r/AllPillDebate22/10/23 08:53 PM
1

My main question here is why people stick to apps when these apps clearly don't work for them. They suck for most people, why the hell do they keep using them? And everything else is really hard if even possible to prove, it mostly lies in one's perception, bias and social circle.
/r/AllPillDebate22/10/23 08:38 PM
4

Stalkers do not love the objects of their desires, they know what they're doing is harmful, but they keep doing it. Quite often they're also violent and they do attack the person they're stalking. It is not love, it's obsession. Bodycount is more about social standards and expecations imv, but in reality both genders care about n-counts to a certain degree. Men have more freedom here because sex isn't seen as something "tainting" them. which from my point of view doesn't sound romantic That's so…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/23 08:34 PM
1

Exactly. I don't really see these kind of relationships often in real life and I don't even know that many women who are/were actively into casual dating scene. Most couples I know have people who dated mostly/only exclusively and monogamously.
/r/AllPillDebate22/10/23 07:41 PM
1

It's more on him to decide really. It isn't something I would advise to get into, as it's a fertile ground to breed resentment, but I also really doubt how often it really happens and there's a whole range between what you're describing and what the OP describing. Thinking in absolutes doesn't help. Most women aren't into casual sex scene and they don't really want to get into LTRs with men they are not attracted to. Also being FWB with one person and wanting something more from the other is val…
/r/AllPillDebate22/10/23 07:35 PM
-2

I don't buy the idea that there are men who get this kind of treatment on a regular basis. There are some women who can behave like this but they're a minority and it mostly depends on women's psychology, libido and well-being rather than on a man. Why strive for relationship if you see it purely as a job?
/r/AllPillDebate22/10/23 07:32 PM
3

It works this ways for both genders. Society has been defining what masculinity is just as much as it's defined what femininity is. Yes, men on averaged enjoyed more rights than women, but it's been changed for quite some time at least in the Western countries. There's still a strong push on both genders to confirm to their gender role and I'd argue men experience more of it because they don't have anything close to feminism.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/23 07:30 PM
1

Yep, another side of the issue here is that after some time this kind of girl will be seen as clingy, annoying and desperate. The OP might enjoy it for some time, but in the long-run this behavior is neither sustainable or something you can build stable relationship on.
/r/AllPillDebate22/10/23 07:27 PM
1

I think you can have a healthy outlook on relationship and be content with what you have as long as you have realistic expectations. I don't get the idea of pining for unattainable and getting bitter over it.
/r/AllPillDebate22/10/23 06:13 PM
-1

Women disproportionally have reactive desire. We usually get all horny in the beginning of relationships due to the rush of hormones, but in long-term relationships the tsunami gets into a steady stream. You also get comfortable the more time you spend together and the more you get to know each other. Keep being nervous isn't a good sign. What I don't get is...why torture yourself with unrealistic expectations? In the same way you could imagine how you're one of the richest people out there havi…
/r/AllPillDebate22/10/23 05:59 PM
5

There's a lot of negative content about men and extremely negative content in the lines of "kill all men" gets reposted and shared because it's, well, ridiculous, but enough people try to justify it. If we call manifestation of misogyny exhibited by women internalized misogyny, I see no reason why we wouldn't call toxic masculinity internalized misandry. Both things are results of internalizing gender roles and how you should police yourself and others to conform to their gender role.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/23 05:55 PM
6

I think in the context of western countries we should discuss misandry and misogyny together. Feminism does a pretty poor job differentiating between itself and "kill all men" attitude which gives people pushing against women's rights a very easy target. Also it's wrong to see misogyny and misandry as something done entirely by the other gender, both are perpetuated by both genders. What we call toxic masculinity is a type of misandry and we do have to address women's role in it. I'm not saying …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/23 04:54 PM
10

My stance is that misandry and misogyny affect each other and we can't get rid of one without addressing the other. Yes, they have different outcomes, but at least if we're talking about western countries, these outcomes are still interconnected. We could all benefit from helping men not to become another statistics in crime/addiction/homelessness rates.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/23 04:00 PM
1

We don't really have enough information about social structure in prehistoric times to speculate about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/23 03:25 PM
0

That's not what I've said. Also beggars can't be choosers.
/r/AllPillDebate22/10/23 03:22 PM
14

I don't think that playing the tug of war trying to decide who has it worse is productive for either group. It would be more productive to remember that each issue fuels another. Neither misogyny or misandry exist in their own bubble perpetuated only by one gender. Both things are the wrongdoings (although usually not intentional) of both genders. Concentrating on seeking the middle ground and addressing both genders' issues would lessen everyone's load. For example, men clearly need mental heal…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/23 03:14 PM
0

Does anything of it contradicts the idea that most men are partnered and have friends? Young men seem to be disproportionally single, but it shouldn't stop them from having friends.
/r/AllPillDebate22/10/23 02:59 PM
1

There are studies showing it does help people, so it's good that it's not up to you I guess. What alternative would you suggest?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/23 02:54 PM
1

It's an interesting topic - some instances of women's failings are getting ignored or rushed under the rug, while in other cases even when it isn't their wrong-doing they get blamed for certain actions. I'd guess the difference lies in the gender role - as long as it's something around kids women are held more accountable than men. But domestic abuse with a female perpetrator goes against the idea of a man being in an active strong role and it flips to be his wrongdoing although it's objectively…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/23 02:54 PM
1

I'd like to see stats on it. There are far less single fathers to start with, I'd be surprised to see that the number of women not paying child support is greater than the number of men. You could use the same logic - some men's rooms look awful. Most women prefer to have female roommates and I'd guess a lot of men would prefer to live with a female roommate if they had a choice, but I might be wrong here. There are certain qualities and behavior that is more common among women rather than men t…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/23 02:50 PM
1

Neither gender has a bias purely for existing. But there are biases based on gender roles and our stereotypes of men and women. Men are considered to be more rational, for example.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/10/23 02:45 PM
–

Can you elaborate?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 06:59 PM
–

Nah, women creating trashy content "short men aren't men" etc. are trashy themselves and I wouldn't defend them. It's different to having a preference though. Just as you can have a preference for n-counts without being judgmental about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 06:51 PM
–

By default we all have this power at least to a certain extent - we all can leave our relationships if we're mistreated. Of course, if we don't talk about abusive relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 06:50 PM
–

It's good to clarify what the other person means before engaging in a discussion.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 06:47 PM
–

How does posting about your bf height equate to judging men for their insecurity? "My partner is xx' " isn't judgmental by itself, even saying "I prefer to date men taller than xx' " isn't judgmental. Insulting people who don't pass your preferences is judgmental.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 06:46 PM
-10

Okay, if we use this chart, I'd say that most men I know are somewhere between 4 and 7 which makes sense as most people are close to being average. They have friends, family and most have partners who care for them. They also care for their loved ones and they write to their friends even if it's just sending some memes. They go out with their girlfriends/wives and with their friends, they have family celebrations etc. Having no friends and being isolated is not the norm, it's the consequences of…
/r/AllPillDebate21/10/23 06:45 PM
–

What do you mean by having power/leverage?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 06:40 PM
–

It's more about shitting on other women in the attempt to deal with your issues/insecurities/get male attention. I think you want to talk about hypocrisy of having height standards and not liking other people calling you a dwarf, but it's hypocrisy only if you yourself call short people names.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 06:38 PM
–

Don't date trashy women.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 06:36 PM
–

Not as good as raw, but I'm not sure why people prioritize "feels good" over health.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 06:34 PM
–

She's a minor and she's most likely influenced by adults around her. Even if it makes her feel special, it's still detrimental for her health.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 06:33 PM
–

I think we should prioritize our partners but not to the expense of our own well-being. Everything is good in moderation. I'm happy to cook whatever he wants, but not when I'm sick or exhausted. He's happy to get my snacks or cook what I want, but, again, not when he's sick or exhausted etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 06:00 PM
–

I know and I'm fine with it. I already have enough restrictions in my diet. I do my best to get sugar from not highly processed food though.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 05:57 PM
–

No 11 years old has a "happy" pregnancy, what the hell. At this age it isn't the question of "happy", it's the question of health and there are all sorts of risks tied to being pregnant at this age.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 05:53 PM
1

Yeah, that would be a dealbreaker. I doubt I'd enjoy always being the initiator and I like having some variety and experiments in our bedroom. I doubt we could do it if he wasn't interested in sex in the first place. I'd have no issues with lower frequency as long as he was initiating half of the times though and still wanted to try different things out though. Let's say...every other day is ideal, but I could leave with once a week if the session was long and intensive enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 04:58 PM
1

It's hard to differentiate between one's bias and pure experience, sure. No, I'm saying that people whose experience goes against common stereotypes often feel inadequate. I get this feeling too - Russian stereotypes about gender roles made me feel rather...ridiculous and it took some time to figure out that it wasn't "me" issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 04:55 PM
2

I agree - men and women have different privileges and issues often coming from their privileges. Neither gender has it all good.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 04:53 PM
1

Why do you think men performed these tasks on their own and women did never perform them in the first place?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 04:52 PM
1

Thanks for a thoughtful reply!
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 03:59 PM
1

I am not really sure about it. Men do gossip and men do try to destroy someone through gossips. One doesn't need WAW effect to start rumors.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 03:58 PM
1

As I've said - I don't think people really check the stats or form their opinion based on the statistics. There's a stereotype that women are more nurturing, less dangerous and more caring and whatnot. It follows gender roles and a lot of people get confirmation of this stereotype from their lives experience. Of course, people who have opposite experience feel alienated.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 03:56 PM
1

If you think men used to be the only one doing heavy labor task, you should read about farming, for example. Or how society kept running when most men went to the war.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 03:54 PM
2

Thank you
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 03:49 PM
1

What do you mean by gynocentric? In manosphere it usually means that society caters to women more than men, but I don't think it's true. Society is biased both towards men and women just in different aspects.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 03:49 PM
2

Basically women are seen as better people and expected to behave like better people. I remember a Russian story about a father abandoning his child in an airport...everything asked where the mother was and how she had allowed it to happen.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 03:46 PM
1

Humans are social creatures. We've managed to survive and evolve because we can cooperate, both men and women need to be a part of society for their well-being.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 03:45 PM
0

He can't fulfil his basic needs because he can't connect with people. CBT could help to develop the skills needed.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/10/23 03:44 PM
3

So...no, you didn't guess correctly.
/r/AllPillDebate20/10/23 10:07 PM
5

Eh, men engaging into these things as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/23 10:06 PM
2

I don't think the rates of death penalty matter in the discussion of crime committing rates. As long as a person is convicted for the crime, they're a part of stats independent of the length or severity of their sentence.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/23 10:04 PM
3

You're welcome :)
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/23 10:02 PM
2

Thank you :)
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/23 10:02 PM
3

What is social violence?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/23 10:01 PM
7

That's why I wrote that we can argue how reasonable or fair it is. It makes sense to say that women are better at certain aspects, it becomes problematic when we overgeneralize. Less pain? I remember reading about something opposite of it - i.e. women get less pain medication because they're seen as too emotional and that they're overreacting.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/23 10:00 PM
2

He's a bit taller than average, but when we met he was very skinny.
/r/AllPillDebate20/10/23 09:57 PM
2

Eugenics is mostly about the state deciding who breeds and who doesn't. Personal choices have little to do with it.
/r/AllPillDebate20/10/23 09:57 PM
2

Can you give me some examples of women seeing men they are not attracted as "less than human"? How is it shown practically?
/r/AllPillDebate20/10/23 09:57 PM
1

I get it, but I think relying that heavily on other people's perception is a bad way to deal with your insecurity.
/r/AllPillDebate20/10/23 09:22 PM
8

Yes, I am a woman and I'm not sure what the first paragraph has to do with my post. I was talking about random strangers living with you and, well, when you cohabitate you are not strangers anymore. It also isn't just the safety issue, I think sharing your place with a woman is easier than with a man. Oh, you're pro-life. I'm not going to discuss this under this context, I don't think it's productive. I do think that preventing a birth of an unwanted child is better than forcing a woman to keep …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/23 09:21 PM
2

I'll check out the studies, thanks! Do you think it affects murder sentences? It isn't a crime that is easy to "wave off" and I think men score much higher in this regard anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/23 09:08 PM
6

It depends on what kind of traits and behavior we're talking about. Objectively women do commit far less violent crimes and perform most of childcare, care for the sick and elderly. Saying that women are less violent and more nurturing isn't sexist imv.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/23 09:04 PM
2

Does it work this way for you? Do you see women you are not attracted as "less than human"? I'm not attracted to almost all people around me with the exception for my husband. I still see them as human beings.
/r/AllPillDebate20/10/23 05:45 PM
1

I like being complimented about my personality rather than appearance, although both type of compliments are nice. I like when people acknowledge my efforts to take care of them and validate that I'm a good spouse/friend etc. For some reason my FiL gives the best compliments, he said I'm iron-willed and he's absolutely fascinated with my mother and wrote about it to my husband saying that he did the right choice and I'm a lot like my mother which is true.
/r/AllPillDebate20/10/23 05:42 PM
3

Considering that I've ever dated only my husband, that's far less than 20% of men lol.
/r/AllPillDebate20/10/23 05:39 PM
0

Eugenics is about "improving genetic quality of nation", hence the filtering of people who can and cannot breed. Personal choices based on this reasoning can be called eugenics, but most people don't really do it and just go for partners they find attractive.
/r/AllPillDebate20/10/23 05:38 PM
1

What do you mean by dehumanization? Also no, personal choices are not eugenics.
/r/AllPillDebate20/10/23 05:24 PM
87

Women are wonderful effect has been studied for quite some time. It seems we ascribe better traits and behavior to women, although we could argue how reasonable and fair it is. I'd say that seeing women as less threatening is valid considering violent crimes statistics. If I had to choose between living with a random woman or a man, I'd pick a woman like most other people really. Women are still seen as more nurturing and caring and I'd guess it's true to a certain degree, but I'm not sure how w…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/23 05:19 PM
1

if (person != husband && personIsFlirting) { return(rejection); }
/r/AllPillDebate20/10/23 06:13 AM
-5

What do youean by being chivalrous and who's really expecting that?
/r/AllPillDebate20/10/23 05:59 AM
5

People have to seek compatible partners, yes. It's surprising that it has to be spelt out, but it seems there are too many people who think they can make it work by trying to change their partner. From what I've seen most people seek aox of traditional and modern gender roles. Most coupled I know are on an egalitarian side: both partners work, both do chores, both have the decisive power in their relationship. Women still tend to do slightly more chores and childcare and men do most of car maint…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/10/23 05:57 AM
4

It's a really recent study and it doesn't seem you can access full text online which is a pity, because you do have to read the methodology before you jump to conclusions.
/r/AllPillDebate19/10/23 10:00 PM
1

On a personal note, I work from home and barely post any photos online. I get occasional "hey, pretty", but not that often and I just block them. I don't think any of my male friends have some unrequested feelings for me - they're on the older side and married for years. It's more "older brother" kind of relationships. Most women I know closely don't find having orbiters pleasant and they cut them off. If you've rejected a man, there's a reason for it and having someone bugging you with flirting…
/r/AllPillDebate19/10/23 09:57 PM
0

I guess it depends on just how many people she meets regularly. If one's occupation or hobbies don't involve meeting a bunch of new people all the time, you probably don't have many/any orbiters. Especially if you're not that active on social medias/don't post much photos/your pages are closed for strangers etc.
/r/AllPillDebate19/10/23 09:53 PM
-6

I guess my "football teams" are invisible. On a serious note though - no. Some women just reduce/cut contact with people who have unrequested feelings for them, and you greatly overestimate how desperate and thirsty men are.
/r/AllPillDebate19/10/23 09:39 PM
–

Probably.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/23 09:11 PM
–

Did you get your kids tested? Also continuing your logic people should buy goods from trusted stores in the first place. Most people don't go and get their product tested anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/23 09:09 PM
–

The state already has all the power for this kind of abuse anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/23 09:04 PM
–

To add to the paternity test discussion. I'd support mandatory paternity tests if they went with a universal DNA database. It would make easier to find criminals, find real fathers (and relatives in case of need) and would be a huge help to researches working with DNA. Realistically most likely we won't see it implemented. It isn't something the state greatly benefits from and if some men have doubts, they can seek the test on their own. I get both sides - from one hand, yes, men don't have this…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/23 08:00 PM
2

You should read some of his posts and comments here. He needs therapy, but as many other troubled and isolated men, he loathes the idea of it and probably won't reach for the help he needs. One of the worst traits of mental health issues - they stop you from reaching out and make it much much harder for you to seek help.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/23 07:53 PM
2

Appearance does matter and Halo effect is real. Other things also come to play and there's the opposite effect of Halo, when we see kind and hard-working people as more attractive than they are.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/23 07:01 PM
4

You don't realize how a proper experiment has to be conducted, what sample bias is or what cherry-picking is. I guess there's no point in continuing this discussion. Btw I've never used a dating app nor most women I know. You get a specific subset of women on apps, but you refuse to acknowledge it.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/23 03:59 PM
4

Being misogynistic doesn't mean you'll lose your job really.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/23 02:55 PM
7

Have you ever tried therapy? It seems you generally feel alienated from people and have hard time understanding them, I wonder whether you might have a spectrum or something in these lines. From what I've read even ADHD can make you feel surrounded by aliens and not your humanfolk. People react negatively to your questions because these posts usually are loaded with negative assumptions about the topic. I remember your previous posts - they do show a total lack of understanding the topic and a n…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/23 01:54 PM
4

You need to get out of echo chambers. Stop consuming content around dating, sex and genders for some time. Take a break. You need a new social circle and most likely you need therapy. Obsession isn't okay and it seems you struggle with intrusive thoughts. Is therapy available to you? What do you do for a living now? People generally don't care about others and PPD isn't the right place to get sympathy. There's a user telling others that he hoped their pets were suffering before they died. Nobody…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/23 01:50 PM
5

He views women's sexuality and libido through a lens of "men's libido is the norm". So if women have lower libido - women don't desire sex hence all sex is transactional according to his posts. If women get uneasy when strange men approach them - women probably think men are morally wrong to try to date them, he doesn't understand why women date men at all etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/23 01:47 PM
6

Some women don't give a fuck, some delude themselves to think these guys are "joking". Some of them were baits themselves. There's also the question of just how many women stopped replying - but people pay attention only to the ones who didn't. There's also a large subset of women who just don't use dating apps.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/23 01:37 PM
2

Thank you. Although I can be mean and rude at times as well, but I think adding unnecessarily hostility doesn't really help anyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/10/23 01:35 PM
3

Size difference sucks lol Now I just order most things online, fuck it. Uniqlo doesn't have xxs in store and it's discrimination.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/23 10:21 PM
13

How are you doing these days? Generally. Have you got new friends, new social circle? Re-intergrating into society is hard and it seems you need help doing it. Are there any communities or help you could reach for? If we go with batshit crazy people online, everyone should hate everyone. You have no idea what kind of messages women get on reddit and we just do our best trying to remember that no, not everyone is like that and there are sane and pleasant men out there. Anonymity just brings the w…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/23 09:59 PM
76

People usually tell on themselves and the more you get to know a person, the higher are the chances that they'll let it slip sooner or later. We can also get clues from the way you behave, what kind of humor you prefer etc. People with low social skills and poor masking can be very obvious in their emotions as well. I don't really believe the argument "you struggle at dating because you hate women" though. Yeah, there are enough men who have very low opinion about women but who still can get dat…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/23 09:57 PM
0

Toxic mascilinity is about men hurting themselves and others, including their fellow men.
/r/AllPillDebate18/10/23 08:01 PM
2

Creating a test that checks uniformly different type of intelligence makes sense - if you put more tasks for spatial intelligence, men will score higher, but if you put more tasks for verbal intelligence, women will score higher. Neither test would be objective and claiming that one gender is more intelligent than the other would be wrong. It is a meta-analysis which is more objective than an individual study. I'm not sure whether there's an analysis for studies including only adults.
/r/AllPillDebate18/10/23 05:14 PM
2

Here's meta-analysis Forty-eight studies, encompassing 78 samples, included data for the FSIQ. The estimated mean effect size was significant but practically negligible, with slightly higher scores in males than in females, d = 0.09, 95%CI [0.04, 0.14], p < 0.001. ... Concerning the first aim, we investigated the effect on the FSIQ. We found that there is a male advantage which, albeit statistically significant, is negligible in terms of magnitude (equivalent to a difference of 1.395 IQ points) …
/r/AllPillDebate18/10/23 04:36 PM
2

The last time I've checked there were different results, so no.
/r/AllPillDebate18/10/23 04:23 PM
1

Nah, thanks, I'm good.
/r/AllPillDebate18/10/23 02:02 PM
1

I think it's mostly the poverty issue and in some cases the cultural problem. No one wants to live in a poor neighborhood with all issues linked to it. On another note, I also wouldn't want to live in a neighborhood where all women were covering their hair due to religious reasons because I'd stand out as a beacon.
/r/AllPillDebate18/10/23 01:55 PM
2

The stats say that a group of people commit more crimes, people see it in real life, people are going to act accordingly. I think it becomes racist/sexist if you mistreat these people out of your convictions. But taking precautions for your own safety != mistreatment.
/r/AllPillDebate18/10/23 01:46 PM
-1

It's still gonna be about men. It's not that one race is more violent than the other, men are more violent than women.
/r/AllPillDebate18/10/23 01:44 PM
–

Exactly. It's important to find a compatible partner and if one keeps dating shitty men/women, they should take a long look at their vetting process or who they find attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/23 01:43 PM
-1

Can you elaborate?
/r/AllPillDebate18/10/23 01:31 PM
–

Please, cite the part you're talking about.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/23 01:28 AM
-1

Even when you take race into play it's still mostly about gender. Men commit more crimes (the minority of them, sure), men have higher rates for violent crimes (again, the minority of them commits these crimes) and men are largely the group who attacks and assaults women (yeah, the minority of men). Women have to take precautions, because, yes, you can't know whether this random man or man you don't know well is a part of this minority or not. Most men understand it.
/r/AllPillDebate18/10/23 01:25 AM
–

On average most couples have 2 working partners and on average men work longer hours while women spend more hours on chores and childcare. You might want to check the links before your reply.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/23 01:21 AM
9

I want my partner to have a white collar job, so he'd have less risks to get injured or develop job-related health issues in the future. Realistically I have more chances to find someone who is compatible with me and who shares my interests if I concentrate on people with a degree. Of course, it's a rude stereotype and I'm sure there are enough blue-collar workers who are egalitarian, liberal, environmentally conscious and like art and literature, but I haven't met any of them. It's a question o…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/23 01:19 AM
–

I am a woman and the stats for the US are here: https://www.bls.gov/news.release/pdf/atus.pdf https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2023/04/13/in-a-growing-share-of-u-s-marriages-husbands-and-wives-earn-about-the-same/
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/23 01:13 AM
–

Where are you from if you're comfortable sharing? Statistically in the US (and stats from some European countries are pretty similar) men work longer hours while women do more around the house. I haven't checked this source, but pew research did show that even accounting for work, chores and childcare men spend slightly less time on their responsibilities compared to women. It doesn't mean men don't bring anything to the table though. The link also shows that slightly more than half marriages st…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/23 01:13 AM
2

Tbh I've never seen behavior like this. I have seen some points in my high school couple, but the guy wasn't "Chad" by any means and he was just purely abusive. She was tolerating it because a) she was young and b) she was from a rather unfortunate family.
/r/AllPillDebate18/10/23 12:40 AM
–

Just no. Men do bring things to the table, just as women do. Men work longer hours, while women spend more hours on childcare and chores, there are men capable of performing emotional labor and be equal spouses and parents. There are also more traditionally-minded men who can perform their traditional gender role and women interested in it. Claiming that either gender doesn't provide anything to the table is delusional and shows the quality of people you're around or the quality of partners you'…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/23 12:22 AM
1

We don't overuse it.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/10/23 12:18 AM
2

Healthy relationships should be able to navigate a situation like that. Husband and I have the rule that we both can ask each other to reduce the communication with a certain person/cut contact for a good reason. Partner comes first.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 09:54 PM
8

Open hatred is better than unrequested love. Hidden hatred under the mask of friendship can be much worse imv.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 09:52 PM
1

It can happen, but I think it's easier to notice a man with ulterior motives.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 09:50 PM
2

Better a man in love because there are less chances he will fuck you up when you the least expect it. Taking aside stalkers, psychos etc. If he's really in love with me and just wants me to be happy, it's better to deal with than a woman who pretends to be my friend but hates my guts for some reason. The typical fall out here would be him confessing, getting rejected and cutting the ties. Unfortunate, but manageable. Getting into a fight with my supposed close female friends is worse experience.…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 08:59 PM
1

You think you know. There are a lot of couples who don't fit your notion, but you write them off as "BB" although you don't know their situation. Basically your theories are unfalsifiable because lots of it is based on the idea that "you know better".
/r/AllPillDebate17/10/23 04:47 PM
-1

Well, you guys aren't women and haven't lived life as a woman, but you're very secure in your idea that you know how women live.
/r/AllPillDebate17/10/23 04:40 PM
1

I think we have a bit different definition for "competitors". Negotiation is different to competition.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 04:38 PM
–

Therapy works. Louder for people in the back please. I'm glad you're in this space and I'm pissed with your biological father.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 04:37 PM
–

Men proposing to have open relationships and getting butthurt later will never stop to amuse me.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 04:36 PM
–

Lol. It kind of explains some men reaching out to complain about their gf/ex, but they get advice and "oh, I have to go do this and that thing with my husband".
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 04:35 PM
–

I think it's okay to feel confused. From what I read having your abusers being dead...is an interesting experience. It can be freeing, it can reopen old traumas. Having your old abuser getting severely ill is also confusing and there's a mix of what you're supposed to feel under normal circumstance (if they weren't abusive) and what you do feel. Even a lack of any feelings can be confusing.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 04:30 PM
–

Congrats!
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 04:20 PM
0

a) I always wanted to see how the logic behind some unhinged claims works. It's fascinating to see someone delusional to this level and it makes you want to figure out how they make it work in their brain. b) If everyone who disagrees leaves this subdreddit, it will become just another echo chamber. It is an echo chamber already, but I think it's good to bring not black-pilled points. c) I see some young boys posting here and I try to warn them against the black-pill community. They're getting i…
/r/AllPillDebate17/10/23 04:18 PM
–

*Some women will Also not that women who were parts of harem back then had much choice. Or that people outside of elites had much choice. The emperor wants your daughter to be his 300th mistress - the emperor gets his 300th mistress and maybe he'll kill her in 3 month, who knows.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 04:16 PM
–

Stay safe and try to do something to reduce your stress. This piece of shit isn't worth the stress he's putting your through.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 04:13 PM
–

That's kind of how couples operate, no? If the decision affects both of you, you both should have the voice in the making of it. It's also a common excuse to get out of whatever you don't really want to do lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 04:11 PM
–

What? The style itself is tacky. I'll try to find something appealing - maybe this or that one. Haven't read the books, just talking about the covers.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 03:51 PM
-2

Tbh I don't think you would call my school crush or my husband Chads, you have standards higher than most women do.
/r/AllPillDebate17/10/23 03:48 PM
-3

Eh, it depends. I did and do some things from the list just as many women I know. I don't see anything wrong with "double texting" or paying for dates or being consistent with gifts etc. I wouldn't be enthusiastic about a man who didn't reciprocate then and people who do fall for it are responsible for their own actions. You have to keep your boundaries and self-respect.
/r/AllPillDebate17/10/23 02:01 PM
–

Tbh most romance novels covers are pure trash lol. They are fucking tacky. I have no idea why they do it, these covers bring zero allure or enticement, they're honestly unpleasant to look at.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 01:50 PM
–

I wonder why you get ghosted after sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 01:44 PM
19

"High standards" - standards that leave you with a smaller/narrower dating pool that is usual for your social subgroup. What these standards are greatly depends on a person. Someone doesn't want to date anyone looking less stunning that ig models or Hollywood actors, some put more emphasizes on financial aspect, some don't settle on communication skills etc. Personally I know my standards leave me with basically 2-3 options spread in 10 years, because a) it's hard for me to feel sexual attractio…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 01:38 PM
2

Men really don't want to acknowledge than female AI robots would mean having some male AI robots as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 12:45 PM
1

Competitors in a working environment - sure. But not competitors in dating unless we're talking about bi/lesbian women.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 12:44 PM
3

I think some people are better cut out for LTRs than others. Feeling the need to try out different relationships even if your first one is very good probably is an indicator of it. Some grow out of it, some don't. Although I tend to believe that people who need to "get it out of their system" just aren't created for LTRs.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 12:43 PM
1

Both male and female. Look at Japanese/Korean band fans, some of them are just over the board. Or look at men buying bath water lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 12:39 PM
1

It will affect both men and women.
/r/AllPillDebate17/10/23 05:13 AM
3

There probably would be different models and lines, doesn't mean women would go for the most expensive ones.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/10/23 04:33 AM
1

Quite long enough, but they're closer than before. Much closer than AI robot girlfriends and stuff.
/r/AllPillDebate17/10/23 04:31 AM
–

Depression doesn't have an articulated reason to manifest itself, sometimes people's biochemistry just fucks them up.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 09:58 PM
6

Realistically everyone will get fucked up. Our economy will have to adjust and change in order to accommodate a sudden surplus of unemployed people.
/r/AllPillDebate16/10/23 09:56 PM
1

It's the question of money for companies and when it's about income, they move pretty fast. But it's better for people if automation takes a long time.
/r/AllPillDebate16/10/23 09:55 PM
7

A lot of women would forgo both things for an understanding, caring and supportive partner...who also could look like any actor or book/movie character.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 09:54 PM
–

For now it's mostly sci-fi scenario, not something I'd bet my money on.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 08:30 PM
19

If we take the premise seriously, there would be AI male robots as well, so it's not that women wouldn't have a choice. They'd go for ideal and perfect robots too, with a subset of both men and women opting out for something more real. The question is whether this subset will be the majority or minority. If women's standards are as unrealistic as guys here claim them to be, why wouldn't women jump on opportunity to have an ideal boyfriend? With an advanced enough AI a robot bf could tick all the…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 08:28 PM
–

Under the premise that AI and robots are that advanced, I think economy would work differently. Lots of jobs would get automated anyway. UBI might be a possible solution to the crises.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 08:26 PM
–

If we take the idea that this AI can imitate a person but be perfect, yeah, both genders would use a robot.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 08:24 PM
–

Why? If women's standards are as unrealistic as guys here claim them to be, why wouldn't women jump on opportunity to have an ideal boyfriend? With an advanced enough AI a robot bf could tick all the ticks, your know.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 08:22 PM
–

If we take the premise seriously, there would be AI male robots as well, so it's not that women wouldn't have a choice. They'd go for ideal and perfect robots too, with a subset of both men and women opting out for something more real. The question is whether this subset will be the majority or minority.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 08:17 PM
1

There'll be a transitioning phase with laws being changed to accommodate the automation.
/r/AllPillDebate16/10/23 08:14 PM
11

Tbh I don't think I've ever met a man or a woman with all of these qualities. It's quite a combo and it isn't that statistically likely. There are enough average men and women who do date though. Like people who you wouldn't take a second look of. I know a guy who is very...quiet, on a shorter side and below average looking. He also earns significantly less than his wife does and he's less educated. They've been married for some time and have a kid. She's overweight, but I'd say she's more attra…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 07:52 PM
–

All my male friends are somewhat older and have been married for ages. They've known me since I was a teenagers, so it's more "older brother - younger sister" relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 07:00 PM
–

Not out fault men are thirsty. But also there are far less women who have the same level of social issues lots of guys struggle with.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 06:47 PM
–

Imagine being asked the same question again and again. When you posted the answer everywhere already. You gonna lose it sooner or later.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 06:46 PM
14

Lots of jobs will be automated in the future. Truck drivers are mostly men and they most likely are on the list to be automated. The same goes to taxi drivers, train drivers, farmers to a degree etc. It's gonna be hell of a time to live in and I'm curious how we gonna work around it. UBI might be the solution to the millions of people getting unemployed.
/r/AllPillDebate16/10/23 06:41 PM
–

I'm curious whether the boys will face any legal repercussion for it. They and their parent should really.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 06:35 PM
2

Both things matter. Being short or having unfortunate facial features does make one's dating life harder and in some cases just stops them from getting any action whatsoever. We just tend to disagree where the bar is and how many people are stopped purely due to their looks. Most people are average and close to average - we can go outside and see enough of them dating and forming families. So basically if one average-looking man can date and the other can't, they must have some difference beyond…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 05:22 PM
0

I don't think it's that common really, deadbedroom happens in a minority of marriages and most people do not want or plan to settle for someone they feel zero attraction to.
/r/AllPillDebate16/10/23 05:19 PM
1

It's a pretty random number - I suppose if we made this much, we could not only live comfortably themselves, but also have kids and provide for both of our families.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 05:17 PM
–

I think a man will be less likely offended about it, but if you fuck on a regular basis, chances are high he will develop feelings and will want something more. As long as you don't lol. At least that's what I've read online.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 01:34 AM
–

It depends on one's social circle and age group. The older you get, the more options check one or several categories listed. I don't think these standards are high btw. Just as wanting a man who's not overweight, isn't a baby daddy or high body-count/virgin (depending on one's preferences) aren't high standards either.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 01:33 AM
2

As long as she can make it clear to him that she doesn't feel any romantic or sexual attraction to him and they're both fine with it...It's a shitty situation, but if they're both willing to make it work, they both could benefit from it. Although I'm not sure they can realistically cope with having sex with no attraction on her part. On a side note, I'd be worried about cohabitating with a man while having small children in the household.
/r/AllPillDebate16/10/23 01:18 AM
2

I don't. I make more money doing what I do than I'd do as a cleaner or nanny (most common jobs for women in our position), but I don't work full-time because I also study.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 01:08 AM
5

As I've said - ideal doesn't exist. I don't think there's either man or woman who would check all the things I've listed and it would be foolish to expect to date someone like this.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 12:39 AM
3

As I've said ideal isn't realistic. Where in my original comment did you find anything it being realistic? Realistically I want my husband and I to get to the point where we together make around 100k. It would provide a comfortable lifestyle and we could have a baby. So far we live below poverty line due to reasons outside of our control and I'm fine with it. I know it's temporary.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 12:38 AM
2

Well, there was miscommunication - I thought you were talking about some mythical path where men used to kill each other for sex. I also think there's another miscommunication as well. Women earn degrees and make money not because they think it makes them more attractive for men, most of us do it because we want to have a good quality of life and be able to provide for themselves, take care of our parents and spouses and kids in the future. We do it because we have to. A good share also does it …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 12:37 AM
1

I live in a multinational city now, so it's a mix of nationalities. There are a lot of Asians, so I see men who are not 6' dating pretty often.
/r/AllPillDebate16/10/23 12:07 AM
4

I'd date a woman without any issues.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 12:07 AM
3

We're talking about ideal, aren't we? I'd prefer to make 170k myself as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/10/23 12:06 AM
–

Chats are even more glitchy.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/23 08:11 PM
1

Where do you live? It might be a cultural difference, but I see lots of teens dating and no, lots of them are not >6 feet.
/r/AllPillDebate15/10/23 08:11 PM
–

Well, he did find his audience. He also might have rigged the algorithm and he was fucking everywhere. I was getting his videos and I'm a feminist.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/23 08:10 PM
5

"Ideal" doesn't really exist, does it? I'm not sure how many people pounder over this idea either as it isn't exactly healthy. I'm gonna write a little fantasy just because you've asked about it, but I'm not sure what the point is here. An ideal man is a man who is 100% compatible with me and who ticks all the preferences and kinks I have. So he's egalitarian, liberal, pro-LGBTQ+ (a part of it really, he's bi and demi), pro-choice, very environmentally conscious, likes cooking and baking, has id…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/23 08:05 PM
2

Sorry, that part should have been *it doesn't contradict the idea that These days women are catching up. Among young generations women outearn their counterparts if I remember correctly and there are more women getting higher education. Also you've started talking about men killing each other for sex which isn't really 2023 thing. No. Men outperform women due to a bunch of reasons, you can't tie everything to pursuit of sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/23 07:55 PM
2

...At what point did men kill each other for sexual access and not because they were protecting resources or there were religious disagreements or something else? There's a difference in behavior linked to biological reasons, sure. It doesn't mean that men outperformed women greatly due to the social structure that was built in a certain way. Edit: *it doesn't contradict the idea that
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/23 07:03 PM
8

Men outperform women in certain areas due to a mix of biological and social reasons and both gender roles affect each other. Women are expected to do more childcare and chores because men work longer hours. Men are expected to work longer hours, because women shoulder more childcare and chores. But it seems neither gender is okay with the status quo and we need to be explicit with our expectations in order to find a partner compatible to us. Gender roles and gender stereotypes are still strong, …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/23 06:22 PM
1

I have to put efforts into forming a new social circle due to relocation. Women generally put more efforts into their social bonds. Whatever can work for you. A general advice here is volunteering, joining communities you're interested it (starting with language courses and ending with churches) and generally being more sociable and attending more social events trying to meet more people.
/r/AllPillDebate15/10/23 04:56 PM
1

Ughh...I wouldn't date a man who was talking about other women as "ran through" anyway.
/r/AllPillDebate15/10/23 04:53 PM
1

I am not excusing racism, racism is a well-known issue outside of blackpill community.
/r/AllPillDebate15/10/23 04:51 PM
1

Each day the delusions here get wilder and wilder. Go outside, there are lots of men around 5'10 (and somewhat shorter too) in relationships.
/r/AllPillDebate15/10/23 04:00 PM
-2

Most people date and marry partners with similar level of experience. Couples with mismatched experience are rarer than you think.
/r/AllPillDebate15/10/23 05:12 AM
-2

As I've said I don't agree with your perception here.
/r/AllPillDebate15/10/23 04:54 AM
-4

Hoodwinked? I don't share your perception here. Most couples do fall in love at least in the beginning of their relationships and few are formed purely for practical reasons.
/r/AllPillDebate15/10/23 04:35 AM
–

*Some women. Hateful and inflammatory videos get the most engagement, Tate was popular at some point, it doesn't mean most men are misogynistic.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/23 04:18 AM
–

Yeah, too many teens.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/23 03:30 AM
1

I'm sorry, but I'm going to take it with a bit grain of salt. A lot of men here seem not to only have no social circle, but also have a rather shitty lifestyle overall. There's also learned helplessness which makes you give half-assed attempts to improve your situation only for you to fail (because no real effort was put) anddrown your further. It's hard to deal with it on its own.
/r/AllPillDebate15/10/23 03:29 AM
–

He should live in a cave and cease his attempts at pretending to be a civilized person.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/23 03:28 AM
–

Quite a lot. An attractive man can lose all his points if he's dirty and sloppy. An average/somewhat below average can improve greatly with time and effort put into his appearance. There are also people who aren't pretty visually but they have a style and confidence in them that attracts people.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/23 03:27 AM
–

I was mostly joking, considering I'm in my late 20s. I do use FB for the book club, it's mostly women in their 20s and 30s too.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/23 03:22 AM
1

a) 600k likes don't show that the majority of women agree with the point. b) Likes can be bought. c) If you keep using insults, I'm not going to engage any further.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/23 03:21 AM
5

Both men and women are justified to be upset if/when they realise their partners have led them on or lied about their feelings and intentions. Is it really hard science? I don't think that the majority of LTRs form under the given premise though. People tend to date partners with similar experience.
/r/AllPillDebate15/10/23 03:19 AM
–

I think starting with universal health care, including mental health care, would be a more reasonable move.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/23 03:08 AM
–

I'm an old grandma and I follow FB reading club group. So when I'm bored, I scroll reels. I think they got divorced? Or in the process of it because I don't think there's coming back from it.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/23 03:06 AM
–

Thanks!
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/23 02:02 AM
1

For starters, they need a long break from any kind of social medias and pill-related content. They should develop healthy lifestyle: yes, your sleep schedule, a lack of exercise and shitty diet can make you feel more depressed. They should get help for their mental health, whether it's therapy or at least some CBT exercises they can do themselves. They need offline friends. They also should figure out what their preferences really are and whether their fear and disgust towards women with experie…
/r/AllPillDebate15/10/23 02:02 AM
–

It seems we need some intervention program for struggling teens, but I'm not sure what the right approach would be here.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/23 01:19 AM
–

I've seen a similar video with a woman cleaning up after a few weeks of her husband not doing anything around the house while she was working as a nurse + studying. An awful sight really.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/23 01:11 AM
–

The woman in the post stopped cleaning the second floor at all and her husband has never cleaned it in 10 months. This is vile.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/23 12:15 AM
–

Thanks!
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/23 12:11 AM
–

I'm curious how the hell it happens. Have they not cohabitated prior marriage? I've read some stories about men suddenly/gradually stopping doing any chores after having kids and it looks like a fucking baby trap in reverse. I'm blessed with a man whose cleaning standards are higher than mine and who does chores on a regular basis without me reminding him at all. But I'd also say it's pretty common and among my cousins no one has married a man who's utterly messy/doesn't do his fair share.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/10/23 12:05 AM
1

And spaces like this make these conditions worse. It isn't surprising that people with mental issues are drawn to them, it's similar to eating disorder sufferers creating forums encouraging each other to starve.
/r/AllPillDebate15/10/23 12:02 AM
1

Has it ever happened to you? What have you done?
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 11:57 PM
1

If he's stopped putting any efforts into dating, yeah, he refuses to date.
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 11:56 PM
0

Intrusive thoughts/anxiety disorder.
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 11:56 PM
1

We can always compare ourselves with more fortunate people, whether they're prettier or wealthier than we are. But if these thoughts are stopping you from living your life and make you resign from whole parts of life, they're intrusive thoughts that you have to learn to control. It isn't the norm, it's a mental health issue. You won't get a better life by refusing to date because some people have a better dating experience. Just as a person won't become wealthier if they stop trying to get out o…
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 11:40 PM
1

Most people work 5 days. Working 7 days is a struggle though, why are you gonna work without any days-off?
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 11:38 PM
1

Wasn't the number around 40% last time? Apps don't work for you, why stick to them?
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 11:38 PM
1

The last time I checked the stats "online" was around 40%? And online includes more apps than just olds.
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 11:37 PM
1

Also this, yep.
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 11:36 PM
–

Period + cold with coughing and sneezing is a combo from hell. But husband brought me some pizza and cookies, so I'll live.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/23 11:31 PM
–

It will get banned sooner or later. I do wonder how we could help men drawn to spaces like this, because it's a wild mix of body dismorphia, loneliness, learned helplessness and most likely a bunch of other mental health issues. Some seem to be purely psychopathic, but it might be just edgy teens trying to impress others.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/23 11:26 PM
1

Don't get me wrong, it's okay and human to be insecure. You can't let your insecurities stop you from living your life though. If you give up now, it will be only harder to pick up the slack later on the road.
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 11:24 PM
-4

More than half couples meet offline. The number is probably lower after covid, but apps don't work for the vast majority of people, so I wouldn't use them as a bar of "not attractive enough". You have some deep-running insecurities which get worse due to the content you're consuming online. You're similar to a girl avoiding socialization because "she's fat" although she might be objectively in a healthy weight.
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 11:22 PM
1

Do you have any days-off? What do you do for a living? Apps don't work for most men. Men keep using them because they don't want to put extra effort and they don't want to/are afraid of working on their social circle.
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 11:21 PM
–

Some people are shitty and are waaay too tied to gender roles and their expectations of them.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/23 11:19 PM
-5

You're way to young to be giving up on dating really. As I've said, you should give up on pill communities. Delete all social medias, stop watching YouTube, go as offline as you can. Expand your social circle, go the gym, improve your health, join some hobby groups etc. You're young, you're supposed to live your life now, not rot online.
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 11:18 PM
–

It's bunch of mentally ill teenagers and adults trying to dump each other further into black pill and despair. A depressing sight.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/23 11:17 PM
–

I'm sorry you're going through it and I'm glad you have the partner you can rely on. It makes life much better.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/23 11:14 PM
-4

How old are you?
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 11:13 PM
-4

Why do you keep going on apps when they don't work for you? Filtering people for height is shallow, but apps are designed to make dating and vetting as shallow as possible. You should stop trying the method that clearly doesn't work for you and work on your social circle. Warm approaches are the best approaches. The median n-count for women is around 4-7, I don't remember for sure. Most women are not riding cock carousel, they have a few LTRs and maybe try casual once or twice.
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 11:12 PM
-6

What you should give up is blackpill spaces and communities. It's a bucket of crabs, they want everyone to fee miserable. You feel they "get" you - they do get you in the same sense sect members "get" vulnerable people and make them feel understood and heard. 5'10 men date, it isn't over. It's over if you think so. My husband is between 5'10 and 5'11, he's the only person I've ever dated and I do see other women checking him out. Your height is average, it might make dating harder for you than i…
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 10:11 PM
-7

Some of you do have cuck fetish, don't you? It doesn't seem that any mentally healthy person would dedicate this amount of their time to humiliating fantasies. Anyway, most dating people have some prior experience to dating their spouse, both men and women. There's also a subset of couples who met early and have zero/close to zero experience dating anyone else, it's not that common, but it does happen.
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 10:04 PM
1

Quite a lot of people here parrot that though.
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 09:57 PM
-1

Everyone who doesn't fully agree with black or red pill is blue by definition, but lots of blue pullers do know about halo effect and admit that appearance matters. It's just not the only thing that does and I'm saying it as a person who wears zero makeup these days.
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 08:56 PM
–

*Some people Most men and women don't think this way, but some cheaters of both sexes try to make excuse like this.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/23 08:51 PM
1

Driving. Not people who'd most likely notice or hear her.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/23 06:02 PM
1

I'd guess there's a stronger link between a man calling himself an incel and his attractiveness level, but even then it isn't universal. Lots of you have body dysmorphia.
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 01:56 AM
2

Not really.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/23 01:32 AM
1

It starts with popular and filters for things you engage with.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/10/23 01:32 AM
1

Depends on your social circle really.
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 12:12 AM
1

I think they could finally stop "the oldest profession" from existence which is great.
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 12:11 AM
0

Considering that most men and women do date, I don't think women's preferences are that complex. If at some point imitating human interactions is going to be possible, the hardest thing would be going around the idea that robots aren't real humans and can't feel love.
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 12:10 AM
-1

I'd imagine that self-learning AI theoretically could be better at romance than real people. It's the question of complexity and just how long time it will take to create one.
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 12:06 AM
0

It's surprising that people are so concentrated on sex part, when we could just...stop doing chores lol.
/r/AllPillDebate14/10/23 12:04 AM
3

You can imitate your content being popular by buying bots.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/23 11:29 PM
1

Well, in an ideal world no one would have to die to start with.
/r/AllPillDebate13/10/23 11:29 PM
0

We also could come further and say that in a perfect world people wouldn't really be people - just soul entities in perpetual bliss.
/r/AllPillDebate13/10/23 11:17 PM
1

Yeah, if it can shoulder most chores and maybe even some childcare, I can see even married couples using one. It can be a "sexless" droid as well in order not to make things weird.
/r/AllPillDebate13/10/23 11:16 PM
-4

Also in an ideal world people wouldn't cope with their issues creating false narratives to soothe themselves.
/r/AllPillDebate13/10/23 10:49 PM
9

The other night I got out of my second job at dusk. I had to stand between two large parked cars while waiting for an opening to cross the street. I've read it as being a parking lot, but I guess it might have been just the road.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/23 10:48 PM
-2

In a perfect world everyone would be socially capable, 100% healthy, have enough money to live on and be attractive, wouldn't they? We don't live in an ideal world though.
/r/AllPillDebate13/10/23 10:43 PM
5

It depends both on your actions and on the way the other person interprets them. From one hand, I'm not sure I'd call him a creep personally, but I would be a bit disturbed in the moment. A strange man approaching you in a place with no other people around and no proper escape route isn't a good sign. From the other hand, I think he could have thought about her perspective and how approaching someone on a parking lot isn't really the best move.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/23 10:05 PM
-4

It isn't the answer really.
/r/AllPillDebate13/10/23 10:00 PM
2

Not really. You can cuddle without any sexual tension. I'm a very touchy person and I like hugging, cuddling, just touching my friends. When we had sleepovers, we'd give massage or just caress each other's backs/arms talking. Ughhhh...I miss it.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/23 09:46 PM
2

Neither of us are lesbians, both bi and she hadn't figured it out at that moment. I think she was as surprised as I was, considering all the context (Russia, she's from a religious family, I was dating already). On another note, I cuddled with my 100% heterosexual friends as well. At school my friends and I would play snowballs, come to my place, change clothes and warm under the same blanket cuddling. When I used to live with my friend in a studio, we'd sometimes sleep in the same bed and she d…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/23 09:37 PM
1

Thank you :) I'm sorry to hear you're depressed. On a flip-side, lower effectiveness doesn't mean lonely men shouldn't try therapy.
/r/AllPillDebate13/10/23 09:36 PM
-3

You can travel. Realistically if you're sure there's no way for you to find a person interested in having sex with you, paying might be your only option. I don't support prostitution or prostitutes' clients, but being realistic it is still an option for lots of men.
/r/AllPillDebate13/10/23 09:13 PM
-4

Where does "should" come from?
/r/AllPillDebate13/10/23 09:12 PM
0

I'm married, so it's not that I need a substitute for a romantic partner. I can imagine my single friends using one though. One doesn't need/want long-term relationships due to time required to maintain one, so maybe having a "bf" in her closet to have fun with wouldn't be a bad idea for her.
/r/AllPillDebate13/10/23 09:10 PM
5

First of all, all people use both direct and indirect communication. With flirting women more heavily rely on indirect signs, but there are women who do ask men out and who are pretty direct in their signals. I'd guess it's more common among older women - you tend to be less afraid of rejection and ridicule. 2 times I was approached by women were somewhat different. One just randomly confessed me and I was...really confused, and with the other we were lying together in bed cuddling when I sudden…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/23 09:03 PM
1

Sorry, but I'm not going to take a claim without source seriously. I've read some articles talking about therapy isn't that effective for men compared to women, but there are many reasons under it including the attitude towards therapy for men overall.
/r/AllPillDebate13/10/23 08:56 PM
2

If I remember correctly Tate also was rigging the algorithm and he isn't the only one doing it.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/23 08:55 PM
67

One day people will learn that whatever content algorithms are showing them in social media isn't a reliable or correct representation of reality. But not today. Social media show you content you interact with the most. They don't show you random content, they don't show you content you ignore. They show you what makes you want to engage, so when you get one video of a woman proclaiming her traditional views and comment under it or even just scroll the comments, the algorithm is going to show yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/10/23 01:20 AM
-1

Is it...a kink of something?
/r/AllPillDebate12/10/23 10:58 PM
–

I'm curious what helped you?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/23 09:51 PM
-1

...Why? Most people are monogamous and prefer monogamous units. Polygamy was practiced not because women wanted it, but because it served men's imperative - get many pretty women to have sex with and have as many kids as possible. Of course, it was available only to the elites and they didn't care about anyone else.
/r/AllPillDebate12/10/23 09:12 PM
–

I'd say it's closer to trying to find this one product you are not allergic to. Compatibility is hard and finding a partner you're compatible with sometimes feels like a miracle.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/23 09:10 PM
–

So I felt like shit yesterday because of the cold. Again. Second in just more than a month and both times were brought by husband and his buddy going to the gym. I thought sport was supposed to improve one's immunity.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/10/23 09:09 PM
2

Top universities probably get lots of students with similar GPA. I know that unis account for volunteering and all, not sure about the start-up thing. And, yes, it's racism. Racism is widely known and accepted in the "normies" community though, we all know it's an issue.
/r/AllPillDebate12/10/23 09:08 PM
-1

Improve your appearance and social skills as much as you can and maybe try to seek someone with similar fetishes (if you have any). It is a harder fit as there are far less women interested in pure casual than there are men and competition is harder. People are not promised that they'll get whatever they want though, it's life.
/r/AllPillDebate12/10/23 06:24 PM
1

Yeah, that's why I said it depends on one's definition. From what I've seen here it seems for a lot of people BB = any relationships unless you're a Chad. I can see why men might not want to have relationships you're describing, but I also can see how enough of struggling men wouldn't mind settling for this kind of family either. But I also doubt it happens that often, after all, people prefer to date and marry partners they are attracted to. It's harder for women to have sex without attraction …
/r/AllPillDebate12/10/23 05:43 PM
1

It depends on one's definition of BB. Men here seem to think that unless you're a Chad, all your relationships are build on money exchange to sex which is very extreme imv. You can be not "666" and have a partner attracted to you and interested in building a life together.
/r/AllPillDebate12/10/23 05:13 PM
1

Of course, my point doesn't describe everyone. Lots of men here fit it though. What is your reasoning?
/r/AllPillDebate12/10/23 04:43 PM
1

To be fair nothing I've listed is easy. Changing the way your brain works is hard. Solving your issues is hard. Getting in shape is hard. Even sticking to a regular healthy sleep schedule can be hard. We still have to do it.
/r/AllPillDebate12/10/23 04:41 PM
1

Can you link a source for that? I've seen some studies showing that men generally benefit less from therapy, but haven't seen anything on lonely men in particular.
/r/AllPillDebate12/10/23 04:39 PM
1

I'm explaining the reasoning behind the attitude. The OP's got my point.
/r/AllPillDebate12/10/23 04:26 PM
1

You are fighting against your environment, hormones and your brain. Our brains and bodies are lazy. They don't want to do anything unless it's pleasant or is closely related to immediate survival. Changing the way you eat and behave is changing the way your body and brain work, so they fight you. Stayin in environment that has led you to obesity isn't helping either. If you have mental health issues, they also load your cart. All in all, you need changes in your attitude and your lifestyle. You …
/r/AllPillDebate12/10/23 04:07 PM
-4

What's the issue then?
/r/AllPillDebate12/10/23 04:01 PM
-3

Most men who date don't really want to get married ASAP, they want to date around. I'd guess the fact that most people who wait till marriage are religious plays a greater role here. You have lower risks of divorce if you're from a community that forbids to seek one in the first place. Join Mormons or Fundamentalists, but not sure you'd like their lifestyle.
/r/AllPillDebate12/10/23 01:58 PM
5

Most likely he applied to a bunch of top universities and the competition there is severe, his stats are not outstanding compared to the rest of candidates and at this point it's just a matter of luck. And probably racism.
/r/AllPillDebate12/10/23 01:55 PM
1

I think it greatly depends on your social circle. People in secure relationships tend to hang out together and vice versa.
/r/AllPillDebate12/10/23 01:44 PM
1

Everyone? Most people still date. It's got messier than it used to be, sure. Also I think dating issues are worse in the US.
/r/AllPillDebate12/10/23 01:41 PM
1

Dating isn't that bad on average, most people date, so they probably do get something valuable out of it.
/r/AllPillDebate12/10/23 12:51 PM
0

It is a double-edged sword. From one hand, a lot of mental issues isolate a person and give them a sense of hopelessness, delusion and learned helplessness. From the other, you can't force a person to change their life and seek help. People outside can help only if a person wants to be helped and is receptive to it. But then again not everyone has people interested in helping them as well. If your parents and friends aren't much of a help, you have only yourself.
/r/AllPillDebate12/10/23 02:55 AM
-2

Most issues can't be solved with one therapy session, you need multiple and constant practice of what you're learning. You have to change the way you think and react to the world, there's a strong link between emotions, thoughts and behaviour. Changing one you can change the others. "Losers" have to change the attitude and work on aspects they're lacking. Thinking you're a loser isn't productive, you have to learn to be kind to yourself and accept your situation in order to be able to change it.
/r/AllPillDebate12/10/23 01:34 AM
-7

Most of the guys here need professional help for their mental health.
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 10:44 PM
-7

It's the sour grape thing. A lot of these men can't get anyone to date, so they choose to sooth themselves with the idea that women are awful and they don't want to date such awful people anyways.
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 09:58 PM
–

You're fine with her sleeping around?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/23 06:57 PM
–

So it's either a woman prioritizing your preferences over hers or a woman without a self-control.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/23 06:56 PM
4

I think not believing in marriage usually comes with being financially independent and not treating property that isn't yours or legally co-owned as yours.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/23 06:51 PM
–

Again, she can be into you and still don't want to have casual sex. Do you mean "she should prioritize my preference over hers" by this phrase?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/23 06:51 PM
–

A woman can like you more and still not be into casual sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/23 06:43 PM
–

What does "high interest" mean? It's great to know your preferences - if people were more honest about their intentions, everyone would save so much time and efforts.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/23 06:34 PM
–

If you're pretty enough, I guess you can get a sugar mommy?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/23 06:30 PM
–

Most couples have 2 working partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/23 06:27 PM
1

There's little point in talking about instinctual behavior when most of our lives are built around myths.
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 06:14 PM
1

Primary childcare activities include time spent providing physical care; playing with children; Tbh I'd assume that playing sport with a kid is still primary childcare.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/23 06:13 PM
–

Some believe that they can get better, some are desperate.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/23 06:10 PM
-1

YouTube videos aren't a good evidence. You can share the links used in the videos if you want, I'm not fishing them out of the videos.
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 06:09 PM
1

You can sum up the points if you want.
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 06:08 PM
–

To the recent conversation how men fool themselves by thinking that bringing in money is the only thing they have to do. Of course, it's a two-way street and I'm sure there are women as aloof as this male character.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/23 05:36 PM
–

I want to spend time with them, so I seek their company whenever I can and I touch them as often as it's appropriate. I also just ask them out.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/23 05:35 PM
0

I'm also not wasting my time on blackpill content. I'm okay with reading, but watching takes too much time.
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 05:33 PM
1

Great! So cooking is a chore, while sport is a leisure activity. I do agree with this differentiation though.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/23 04:40 PM
5

I don't think men have it easier - we all have our own issues and in terms of getting and receiving help for mental health problems men probably do have it harder. There's still the shaming around mental health issues and men tend not to seek professional medical help even when they clearly need it.
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 04:06 PM
9

Well, she's facing a deserved backslash.
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 04:04 PM
1

I'd like to see a proof of this claim.
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 04:03 PM
1

Not really? I've tried a few times, but it rarely leads to anything. People just don't read the links, even their own links.
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 04:03 PM
-2

No, I'm not feeding black pill channels.
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 04:03 PM
1

Is it a debate sub? I haven't really seen much debates here, it's mostly venting, complaining and insults.
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 02:57 PM
–

I'd guess having few crushes would make them stronger and not weaker tbh.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/23 02:56 PM
1

People date close to their socioeconomic level, it's true both for men and women.
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 02:56 PM
0

It's not that I'm trying to refute his points - I don't think it will change anything as guys here are way too deep into the pill, but I am curious just how this mentality works. It isn't something I've seen a lot in real life.
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 01:57 PM
–

I was friendzoned at school. We were friends and we stayed friends after my confession, so everything was fine. We kept being close till graduation and apparently everyone thought we were dating, because we'd go on walks and do favors for each other. We were not dating though. I got over it relatively quickly and was just enjoying his company. He called me a few years ago - he needed some legal advice from my mother. I was happy to hear that he was doing well and he got married.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/23 01:54 PM
1

Ah, we can't really argue for that just by looking at chimpanzee - humans have more complex social structure and stronger bonds between partners.
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 01:51 PM
1

Depends on a person's financial situation I guess. A woman who makes enough money herself has more options close to her socioeconomic level, why would she deliberately choose to date someone broke? Broke people usually do date other broke people.
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 01:50 PM
1

Because these are usually different women? Sure, I wouldn't advise to date a girl who has rejected you in the past, but I see no harm in people having standards. If you can attract women now and couldn't before, good for you to improve your situation. Some men do want to marry and have kids, so...it is what it is.
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 01:49 PM
-2

Can you give me some stats on a "sub-8 male"?
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 01:48 PM
1

Yes and no. A lot of women would avoid dating/taking a guy seriously knowing he's totally broke - it's a bad basis for building a family. It doesn't mean they can't love him - they choose not to develop this kind of feelings.
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 12:53 PM
0

Depends on his goals really. If he wants to have a family and kids, marriage is a good basis for that. If he wants to sleep around, he's free to do so as well. He also can find women with a similar socioeconomic level if he's worried about gold diggers.
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 12:53 PM
-12

I'm genuinely curious with the idea of creating victimhood and your entire persona around it. Like...why? Sure, some women do the same, but I don't get it either.
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 12:46 PM
1

It doesn't mean they don't affect our behavior or that we should abandon them. What's exactly your point?
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 12:41 PM
1

I'd be curious to see a proof for this claim. Have you read the methodology?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/23 12:41 PM
5

Men aren't necessarily bad people. Uncaring and unsupportive men AND women are bad partners though and it's fair to call them out on it.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/23 03:25 AM
–

So...you've expressed your personal preference, cool. What kind of response do you want to get here?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/10/23 03:12 AM
0

As I've said our behaviour is a mix of biological and social reasoning. We can't be fully compared to chimpanzee who have no capacity to create and adhere to the concepts of morals or consent.
/r/AllPillDebate11/10/23 03:09 AM
1

I assume it's an article and there's no study under it with a more detailed methodology? I wonder whether they included or excluded unemployed people, as the study I've linked is talking about full-time employed men. If you included unemployed men into the stats, I think it will change the result.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 10:32 PM
11

I don't think you can objectively measure that. Imv cheating is cheating and it doesn't matter whether he loved her or not - he violated the trust, it's the end.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 09:44 PM
1

They compared the generations from this timeframe: We find that wives’ relative earnings were positively associated with the risk of divorce among couples married in the late 1960s and 1970s, and that this was especially true for wives who outearned their husbands, but this was no longer the case for couples married in the 1990s. Change was concentrated among middle-earning husbands and those without college degrees, a finding consistent with the economic squeeze of the middle class over this pe…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 09:40 PM
0

The difference in the generations use for both studies. I've noted it in the original comment, again, if you'd read more carefully, you'd have noticed it. My link leads to an article including the link to the original study. You aren't reading carefully again.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 08:53 PM
0

It uses a bit younger range of couples. I'm not sure there are any newer studies. When we compare working hours + chores + childcare, men do less than women. If you were more careful, you'd see that it's an article linking to a study.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 07:58 PM
–

Why? You could reach your target way by healthy changes, although it would take more time. Why are you in such a hurry?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 07:43 PM
–

They say you gain weight back when you stick to strict diets. It's better to make sustainable long-term changes.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 06:50 PM
–

Nah, she's risking to get an STD and she's being an idiot staying with a cheater.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 06:24 PM
–

Isn't that a healthy BMI? You probably could improve your overall well-being and mental health by sticking to a healthier diet with higher calorie intake but still a bit lower than you need.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 06:23 PM
2

You can work on your mental health and improve your well-being. You can also work on your social skills and learn how to form and keep bonds with others at least to a certain degree. You can also just give up and keep being angry with everyone, I guess. You can compare it to chronic illnesses if you want - yeah, we can't cure diabetes, it doesn't mean you should stop taking insulin and minding your diet.
/r/AllPillDebate10/10/23 06:22 PM
4

I think quite a good share of mammals have pretty specific mating rituals. Females have a pick and males have to work to impress them. Sometimes it depends on their appearance - how bright the feathers are or behavior and skills - the strongest lion/the best song/the best nest. Another thing is that humans are rather complicated animals. Cerebral cortex made lots of new interactions available for us, no other species has achieved this level of social coordination and the ability to create and ch…
/r/AllPillDebate10/10/23 06:20 PM
–

That sounds like a total mess. Do you really want to participate in it? Also why won't she break up with his cheating ass? She doesn't have to lower herself to his level.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 06:13 PM
–

If you're comfortable, what's your BMI? Do you really need to have that restrictive diet?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 06:12 PM
4

It seems as a miserable way to lead your life. On a practical level I think it isn't conductive to have relationship that feels like a job more often than not. There will be rough times, you will both have sleep deprivation with a newborn, someone will get sick, sometimes you or he will have to take a slack or support each other etc. If you're totally dispassionate about your partner and don't enjoy their company even at the best of time, what are you going to do during the low periods? Also...h…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 05:42 PM
–

These things can work to resolve your stress. They don't resolve your issue. But working on your emotions and on your issues are often 2 different things, because our stressors aren't what they used to be and our bodies still treat our problems like they used to in prehistoric times without recognizing that sometimes making a call is the equivalent of successfully escaping a lion.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 05:35 PM
–

Crying, venting and ranting are all fine as long as a person actually moves on. If they get stuck, they probably should try therapy. The way we process emotions is different to the way we solve issues - if your boss told you off, just correcting the mistake doesn't reduce your stress levels, you need to let it out. Physical activity is great for that, but it doesn't work for everyone. Crying and complaining to someone can help too, as well as just getting long hugs.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 04:55 PM
–

It depends on your issues to start with. Internet strangers don't have nearly enough info for this kind of advice, so they go for general advice. If it's your communication skills - put yourself out more and try talk to people more. If you have issues talking to people, start with small talks with cashiers, talk to your neighbors, rekindle old friendships etc. If you can get friends and dates, but can't keep them, maybe you don't initiate enough or you come as uncaring or it's the opposite and y…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 04:23 PM
–

Every? No. Most can get in relationships and a large portion can get a person they do like.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 04:19 PM
2

Women usually take a bunch of precautions to stay safe. Some behave recklessly, sure, it doesn't mean we all have no worries about staying safe though.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 04:05 PM
6

That's a very interesting example of one's perception being so skewed that they read absolutely not what is written. I'm talking about minors and disabled men because a healthy man below my height is going be stronger anyway. Also disabled men and minors are men. I prefer not to use the phrases "real men/women", as they reinforce gender roles.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 03:57 PM
2

Women usually use pepper sprays and they take a bunch of other precautions. Not carrying a gun doesn't mean you don't take care of your safety.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 02:48 PM
14

Sure. They are still stronger than I am. The OP is talking about physical strength and even if a man is shorter than I am realistically he's still gonna be stronger. So it's either minors or men with disabilities.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 02:46 PM
4

Lots of countries don't allow open carry.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 02:02 PM
7

For starters, it depends on the year of the study - a study using a more recent sample didn't find out a difference in divorce rates between couples with breadwinning wives and not. Putting that aside we do know that even among egalitarian couples women tend to spend more time on household chores and childcare and that men get stressed when their wives make more than 40%. Summing it up it would make sense that breadwinning wives tend to get less support than their male counterparts which theoret…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 01:44 PM
21

I'm 5'2 and weigh less than 100 lbs. Thanks, but I am not going to target men with physical disability or minors, so I could have a physical advantage over my partner. Taking precautions and dating inside my social circle helped me to avoid getting into troubles during dates. All cases of sexual harassment were done not by anyone I was dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 01:33 PM
-2

Thanks :)
/r/AllPillDebate10/10/23 04:34 AM
1

Sometimes attraction can be built over time and quite often women don't initiate even when they are attracted to you. Outdated dating norms still hold strong because there's little incentive to change them on both sides. Men don't want to lose by not approaching (because someone else will approach), women don't have to approach because usually they have enough options and there are some chances that a guy she likes will do the first move himself. Romance in relationships is important and should …
/r/AllPillDebate10/10/23 04:23 AM
1

It's pretty common in comixes, but to be fair most of them are written by Asian authors and I'd guess their cultures are still more into traditional gender roles. It's the same with Korean dramas. But I can come up with 2 other romance books! "Sugar queen" - basically a mailman, although a lawyer in the past. Something about garden by the same author - one lead is an artist and uni professor, the other is a farmer. Tbh I don't read romance that often, but there are works without common tropes wh…
/r/AllPillDebate10/10/23 04:11 AM
1

Maybe because there are enough people who do have pretty good experience with women. People generally are better to others when they like them and vice versa.
/r/AllPillDebate10/10/23 03:59 AM
3

Not initiating at all is weird, but I can see how the ratio of initiations can be skewed just because men tend to have higher libido and women more often have responsive desire.
/r/AllPillDebate10/10/23 03:44 AM
1

Interdependent. We both rely on each other and these days heavier than we used to due to relocation. We both could live on our own if we had to, but it would be much harde, we'd both be much longer and the quality of our lives would be much lower.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/10/23 02:48 AM
1

But it isn't due to the female lead, there are usually some issues that both of them have to overcome tied to something deeper than their relationship.
/r/AllPillDebate10/10/23 02:44 AM
1

I'm not sure it's about respect - it's the mix of biology and culture.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/23 03:56 PM
2

It would be nice if women's bodies were less sexualized, but it doesn't seem that we're getting desensitized to nudity. I wish I could go outside without a bra, but I don't want to have men stare at me. In the same way I wouldn't go out with my breast open to see for everyone, because I don't want to get stares.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/23 03:00 PM
3

Women and men generally bring similar things to the table - partnership, companionship and love. Some lack in certain areas, some stick to each other out of convenience, but this is a general combination. The details can differ, some couples have a male breadwinner while his partner is busy with the household and kids, others split responsibilities more evenly. Some people love showering their partner with gifts, while others prefer showing their live through service etc. On a personal level in …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/23 02:55 PM
2

Both partners are expected to care for and support each other. It becomes an issue if one of them doesn't have any other ways to cope with their stress and negative feelings or can't function as an adult without the other managing them. For my husband and I quality time is the time we take to do something together and talk. It isn't necessary venting - we usually try to concentrate on positive things during our dates.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/23 02:47 PM
1

Eh...in Jane Eyre the dude's troubles were because he lied about his insane wife. In a few comixes I'm reading their issues are mostly from their position - he's the duke, he has to go to the war/he goes hunting/some familial responsibility or trauma.
/r/AllPillDebate09/10/23 02:18 PM
4

The OP sucks at communicating and compromising himself according to his examples. It's...ironic.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/23 02:15 PM
2

Eh, the idea that she puts herself on a line is pretty common too. Male lead gets into trouble, she goes a great length to save him. They often have a quest they're doing together as well. I agree that there's a lack of female duchess or princess going for a peasant though.
/r/AllPillDebate09/10/23 01:44 AM
1

There must be some kind of issue and problem in a plot that gets people invested. It's usually a mix of internal and external issues. You might want to check webtoon comix - from what I've seen lots of them have both Mary Sue and Marty Sues, i.e. yeah, a male lead is crown prince/duke/the most popular guy in college, but a female lead usually is supper pretty, has great personality, often is a lost daughter of some mystic/royal creature etc. Currently there seems to be a liking of male leads who…
/r/AllPillDebate09/10/23 01:27 AM
-4

You have to figure out what actually stops you from dating - social skills, a lack of social life and actually approaching women, appearance, mental health etc. Just applying random advice most likely won't help.
/r/AllPillDebate09/10/23 01:19 AM
12

Around half of couples have partners who either earn similar amount of money or women ourearning her partner. I'm not sure how many couples have "her money" situation, but it isn't something I've really seen in real life outside of more traditional relationship where he pays the bill and she pays her "nails" while also working significantly less. If you don't enjoy spending time with your partner, you probably should break up, yeah.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/23 12:53 AM
10

Splitting seems to be less common in the US, but lots of long-term/married couples have shared budget, don't they? Also if you view dates as women bitching time, the issue might either in your attitude or your vetting. Spending time with your partner is supposed to be pleasant.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/23 12:41 AM
14

When you split or when you already have a shared budget, it isn't a "free meal". It's a quality time and your partner not listening to your wishes at all is a bad sign.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/23 12:30 AM
15

I think it says more about women you're around and women you're dating. On average women tend to be more agreeable than men, so it would make sense that they go on compromises more often as well. There are people who struggle with compromising on both genders, but some compromise way too often and get bitter over time about it, while others can't compromise at all and sometimes they view it as being "weak". In TRP terms it's "losing frame" I guess. On a personal level I'd say both my husband and…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/23 11:48 PM
3

In British English it is usual to spell this word blonde when writing about a woman or girl and blond when writing about a man or boy, although the spelling blonde is sometimes used for men and boys too. In American English the spelling blond is often preferred for either sex. Blonde may be used to describe a woman’s hair, but many people dislike the noun ‘a blonde’ as a way of referring to a woman, as it suggests the most important thing about her is her hair colour and is often used to imply a…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/23 10:43 PM
2

Thank you :) I was from the phone, so looking for a link wasn't comfortable.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/23 10:41 PM
–

Foremothers and forefathers often had to sacrifice their personal interests for the sake of the group they were advocating. Most social movements were ostracized and illegal at some point
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/23 08:35 PM
0

From my experience and experience of people around me: college, work, through social events (they do actually happen, people get married, they have parties, birthdays etc), through friends and relatives, through social medias but it's "friend of a friend" situation. If you're lonely, I'd advise to form a new friend group. I'm in the process of it myself, although for me it's about friends and not dating.
/r/AllPillDebate08/10/23 08:33 PM
–

You can't really have sex standing without a man keeping an awkward position.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/23 08:30 PM
–

Men don't seem to be able to put ingroup interests among their own. At least for now it seems men aren't ready to push for men's rights if it causes them to lose dating options.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/23 07:20 PM
–

I don't know anyone who used an app or got on a date from an app. Have never used one myself.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/23 07:19 PM
0

You don't realize that dating someone and building your life with someone who you are not compatible with can be worse than being single. There are both men and women in miserable marriages, people usually don't want to end up like them.
/r/AllPillDebate08/10/23 07:17 PM
–

I don't have a height requirement and most women I know want someone taller than they are, but they don't have a set number. The US seem to be more height-obsessed.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/23 07:16 PM
–

Eh, it's fair. Big height difference makes kissing and sex somewhat awkward. But there are also not that many 5'2 men to start with and not dating them doesn't equate to treating them as garbage. I do feel sorry for people struggling due to their visual features.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/23 07:11 PM
-2

Compatibility is a thing. If you don't mind settling for anyone willing to date you, it doesn't mean most people are okay with it.
/r/AllPillDebate08/10/23 07:04 PM
1

It's not what I meant - some men complain that they pay more taxes while women get more benefits, I'm curious how many male NEETs are there and whether it will change the ratio of tax payers in the future.
/r/AllPillDebate08/10/23 07:04 PM
–

Nothing you've said justifies cheating.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/23 07:03 PM
–

Couldn't you gender reverse it? In reality most people are average-ish. Neither utterly good or bad. Cheating isn't justified even if your partner is shitty, leave them first.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/23 06:00 PM
-1

As I've said women have a lot of options for casual sex. Not that many option for an LTR, as compatibility plays an important role here.
/r/AllPillDebate08/10/23 05:59 PM
8

There are and were lots of offensive stereotypes about women. Blond stupid girl or blond, stupid and mean girl, a bitchy wife who's always displeased with her partner, a gold digger, an evil stepmother, a crazy cat lady, a psycho ex, stupid groupies etc. Considering exactly bad stereotypes about wives - they're neurotic, unpleasant to be around, bitchy, nagging, "let themselves go" etc. Stereotypes and tropes are built on some real life representation, so we could at least somewhat relate to the…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/23 05:58 PM
-10

I think it depends heavily on your social circle and cultural background. Not that many people are into casual scene and on average both men and women have less sex than they used to.
/r/AllPillDebate08/10/23 04:23 PM
-10

On average women have lower libido than men, there are less chances that a random encounter will lead to an orgasm and we carry worse risks. So it makes sense we don't seek sex as much as we could considering the options. That's casual sex. Sure, there are lots of options for that, but I'm not sure how many women really seek casual. No one in my immediate social circle is into casual dating scene.
/r/AllPillDebate08/10/23 04:09 PM
-11

Your mistake is to think that women behave exactly like you would in this situation and you overestimate the amount of options women have. We don't consider empty "hey, beautiful" comments or DMs as options - cold approaches generally aren't successful and just aren't safe. Some women are fine with it, but I don't think the majority is. We also don't get hit on "everywhere we go", it happens, sure, but the quantity greatly depends on one's appearance and culture. In reality there are so few opti…
/r/AllPillDebate08/10/23 03:59 PM
-2

I'm curious about their numbers and whether there are enough of them to affect the tax ratio.
/r/AllPillDebate08/10/23 03:02 PM
2

Not really. "Less than human" can mean a variety of things.
/r/AllPillDebate08/10/23 02:59 PM
-1

I wouldn't say "eliminated", but I'm curious what their long-term plan is. Their parents will die sooner or later, who will feed them at that point? Their parents also can get sick or require help from them first.
/r/AllPillDebate08/10/23 02:48 PM
0

Dear, you're young. Keep going to the gym, pay attention to your studies and grades, think hard what kind of job you want to have. Fix your jaw. Also try to have fun - do you have friends? Hobbies? What do you do in your free time? Try to stay away from places like this and people who tell you that it's over. It's the crab bucket - they want everyone to be as miserable as they are and the worst thing is that lots of them don't have to be this miserable in the first place. They could get better, …
/r/AllPillDebate08/10/23 02:47 PM
7

We have general stats for marriage duration, divorce rates and dead bedroom situations - most couples don't really struggle as much as some people here believe. But I haven't seen a lot of specific studies about couples with different/similar income levels. There's one showing that men prefer to make around 60% of total income and if their partner makes more that get nervous, but if they have to make more/all themselves they also get even more stressed. And another showing that couples with wome…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/23 02:28 PM
7

Yes. I don't subscribe neither to black or red pill, hence I'm blue. The issue with the blue pill is that it's very diverse and it doesn't have one set of rules. There are mainstream ideas but individuals can differ greatly.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/23 04:57 AM
16

*Some bluepillers agree with it. If I remember correctly currently ~45% couples either have similar incomes or a woman earning more, so it isn't that rare situation for men and women. I think there was a recent pew research on the topic. Also I'd assume that among couples where men are primary breadwinners a good share of them do love each other and enjoy their lives together. Just as the rest of the couples. Fulfilling your duties or your responsibilities generally doesn't make your life meanin…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/23 04:38 AM
-2

What do you mean by "less than human"?
/r/AllPillDebate08/10/23 03:05 AM
15

When strangers meet or when people don't know each other too well, they usually want to make a good impression and avoid any unnecessary confrontation. Why would you argue about your views with a stranger without a good reason for that? We have ppd for that. How often do you just start debated with people you don't know well in real life unless it has a practical reason under it. It's pleasant to give compliments and there are usually things you can pick that you do like. Going to different vaca…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/23 02:56 AM
2

If male friends can't come up with the answer, it might be beneficial to hear a woman's opinion.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/23 01:03 AM
–

As I've said - just as this man had his right to approach her, she had the right to film and post it. It's the risk both are taking. You might not see it as a good enough reason, but it isn't up to you to decide for another person whether they post something or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/23 11:37 PM
1

Older men shouldn't approach girls who look like minors.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/23 11:17 PM
-1

There's no unconditional love. Even parents love their children because they're their children and it's possible for a child to behave in a way that makes them unlovable. We love pets because they're cute and make us happy. Generally we need some impulse to feel a certain way and feeling love without a condition for it usually isn't possible. Having said that it doesn't mean that you "buy" love unless you think that having certain traits or treating your partner in a certain way is the equivalen…
/r/AllPillDebate07/10/23 11:14 PM
5

If he doesn't have female friends to ask advice, it's probably something about his way of behaving/communicating with women overall.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/23 11:02 PM
1

And I'm talking about the OP.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/23 11:01 PM
12

Considering the states preferences and reality, it's pretty known that what people claim to value and what kind of people they date don't always correlate and it's true both for men and women. There are some links about it if you're curious: one and two. Relating to everything else I think what men find attractive in other men doesn't necessarily translate into what women find attractive. Although I'd say it's pretty to see a man similar to your friend in the second point - usually when a person…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/23 10:08 PM
1

Tbh I have no idea what you're complaining about here.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/23 10:00 PM
3

Is it really better? He diminishes her libido by doing so.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/23 09:59 PM
2

It's better to beg then watch porn. Especially for unattractive men like me. I just don't want to, or need to, beg a woman for help in any way at all. I think you've mistyped in one of your comments.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/23 09:03 PM
0

I'd guess it depends on one's ethnicity in the first place. We relocated and we got to know lots of people of our ethnicity in this country, what I've noticed is that most people date inside their ethnicity even when people know the language and hang out with natives. I've also seen women from more traditional cultures who emigrated...the young ones who got education tend not to date men from their own culture because they don't want to confirm it.
/r/AllPillDebate07/10/23 07:46 PM
8

Well, if you're okay with having sex your partner doesn't want, keep on. Just be ready to the point where she stops doing it whatsoever and/or break up with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/23 07:36 PM
2

So did anyone find this man? To share experience and maybe to keep discussing it as I'd assume a lot of people watching her live were commenting about it a lot.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/23 07:36 PM
16

It doesn't work as "she gets turned on", it can work on some in a "she can tolerate his penis for a few minutes to shut him up" way. Of course, it diminishes one's chances to have enjoyable and wanted sex and it's the road to dead bedroom and breaking up.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/23 06:50 PM
-1

Because their worldview is built on the idea of extrapolating extremes to the norm and claiming it isn't their issue, but the issue of all/most men.
/r/AllPillDebate07/10/23 06:12 PM
2

In any way, he had the right to approach her, she had the right to film and share. She wasn't even showing his face or filming exactly this interaction on purpose - he interrupted her as she was already filming. We don't know this dude name or face, so I don't think he personally got any backslash. So...what's the issue exactly?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/23 06:08 PM
1

In any way, he had the right to approach her, she had the right to film and share. She wasn't even showing his face or filming exactly this interaction on purpose - he interrupted her as she was already filming. We don't know this dude name or face, so I don't think he personally got any backslash. So...what's the issue exactly?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/23 06:08 PM
4

Tbh I like preparing gifts more than receiving them, I just like the process. Preparing for celebration, thinking what they need or might like, all of it feels like the beginning of celebration already. I like practical and sentimental gifts, but I hate anything utterly useless. So kitchen appliance that I wanted for a long time is infinitely times better than a plush toy or bouquet. I'd appreciate a book that I was looking at for a long time or a fancy sketchbook as well. Basically it should be…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/23 06:06 PM
19

We discussed this video already, didn't we? She looks like a minor (she's 18, yes, but he couldn't know that and her sitting in a library doesn't mean she's not a minor), while a man is in his 30s. It is a part of the video and in reality he was bugging her for a longer time when she already told him there was miscommunication and she didn't expect him to sit right next to her. She's visibly uncomfortable from the moment he sat next to her. He left only when she told him she's on live. The man s…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/23 02:54 PM
1

He believes that being nice and having sex with a man is enough, but he doesn't realize that most men aren't that desperate and that healthy and stable relationship can't be built only on one partner putting all the effort. Being way too deep into the pill he probably doesn't and won't be able to comprehend it even if he had multiple examples of it in front of his eyes. Seeing this level of indoctrination is both unsettling and curious. It's like talking to a flat-erther who is very sure in his …
/r/AllPillDebate07/10/23 02:37 PM
2

I don't think cheating depends that much on a way you treat your partner. Vetting for someone with strong and consistent morals and consistent behaviour is more important here. There's saying in Russian "however much you feed the wolf, it's looking towards forest anyway", i.e. you can't change another person's behaviour just by being nice to them.
/r/AllPillDebate07/10/23 05:07 AM
1

That...eh...doesn't how it works really. Men who are good functioning partners want to date women who are good functioning partners as well. Also women have to get education, work, do sport and generally be functioning members of society to survive and have a decent quality of life. It might be shocking but a lot of women also take care of others so they have dependents who they provide for in some or other form.
/r/AllPillDebate07/10/23 04:45 AM
2

I'm curious how health issues can be linked to any of these "reasons". You can be very reasonable and still accidentally break your leg or end up with cancer. Your close one can get sick, they can lose their job, you can lose your job, a war can start, your state can be a threat for you, an insane person can attack you, you might be born in poverty or you might be abused as a minor etc. The level of delusion here is really curious. I wonder how you manage to operate in real world.
/r/AllPillDebate07/10/23 04:33 AM
–

It is about being practical. If a good share if men struggle with dating and forming romantic relationships, they could form friendships and get support and emotional intimacy this way. Of course, they also can just don't do anything about it if that's their choice.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/10/23 03:18 AM
0

If you're sure it's your appearance, it would make sense to improve it as much as you can. I don't think most incels are that ugly though, from what I've seen they struggle with social skills more often than not.
/r/AllPillDebate06/10/23 01:35 PM
1

Plastic surgery and hair treatment are things.
/r/AllPillDebate06/10/23 01:10 PM
-1

Is there anything you could do to improve your appearance?
/r/AllPillDebate06/10/23 12:18 PM
-1

A bunch of them gets married early and inside their religious community.
/r/AllPillDebate06/10/23 03:22 AM
-2

Yes, a lot of women prefer to stay single over having relationships that are not net-positive. It doesn't mean only Chads date, as lots of normally looking guys date and can be good partners. Some women (and men) also just aren't cut out for dating and either stick with casual or stay celibate because they don't feel this kind of desire.
/r/AllPillDebate06/10/23 03:22 AM
-1

If there are no people close to you, who are willing to be truthful/honest/helpful, maybe you should take a good look at your social circle. Also maybe a therapist or a couch would help with figuring out the answer.
/r/AllPillDebate06/10/23 03:14 AM
1

Interesting, I haven't thought about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/10/23 12:39 AM
-1

I guess...I'm a man with the exception for owning place and a car, but to be fair I know lots of men without these things including my husband. So I'm a man without a car just as most other women I know.
/r/AllPillDebate05/10/23 10:59 PM
3

Oh, bless your heart. It would be wonderful if sexual harassment didn't exist.
/r/AllPillDebate05/10/23 10:56 PM
2

And I'm saying they're wrong. Women experience a bunch of issues shared with men and some more gendered issues like the amount of sexual harassment and violence directed at them or the risk of pregnancy and all the negative outcomes of one.
/r/AllPillDebate05/10/23 10:51 PM
1

If issues aren't gender exclusive, it doesn't mean these issues don't make one's life harder.
/r/AllPillDebate05/10/23 10:34 PM
1

Do you think during the war women have no problems? Or in general do you think have no issues with jobs, health, their close ones and their problems, finance etc? Women don't become victims of crime, women don't get cheated on or lied to, women don't get fired, they don't develop cancer or even catch flu etc. If you can't feel sympathy or empathy for women's issues, it doesn't stop these things from being issues and problems.
/r/AllPillDebate05/10/23 10:18 PM
-1

Sorry, I've edited my comment to give a more concise reply.
/r/AllPillDebate05/10/23 10:03 PM
-1

Dating isn't the only thing people can struggle with and getting dates isn't the only dating issue either. Finance, dating, marriage, kids, health physical and mental, career and employment, health and well-being of your close ones, all of it can cause some serious issues for a person whatever their gender is. There's war out there happening right now. Men are dying, some women are fleeing with kids and family members, some stay and perform necessary labor, for example, lots of medical professio…
/r/AllPillDebate05/10/23 09:59 PM
-2

These are platitudes and they're pretty useless. Practical advice is to find out why you're struggling and improve in this particular area. Internet strangers who don't know you well can't really pinpoint what your issues are, so it would be better to ask your friends or family members who will be honest and truthful.
/r/AllPillDebate05/10/23 09:58 PM
-6

So...both male and female incels are delusional. I'm not surprised.
/r/AllPillDebate05/10/23 09:56 PM
10

Eh, no, and I don't think marriage is the right place to practice it and find out that you actually can't. Sex without attraction must be awful.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/23 12:49 PM
10

Feelings are a necessary part of marriage. I also can't feel sexual attraction without any feelings and connection involved and I wouldn't want to be trapped in relationship where I didn't want to have sex with my spouse.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/23 12:43 PM
–

If she wants to have sex, why the hell is it a reward for him? Viewing sex as a reward or prize isjust sad.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/23 04:19 AM
–

Oatmeal with oatmilk, blueberries and banana, 2 cups of coffee, granola bar (maybe 2, not sure), an apple, fried salmon with rice, a price of dark chocolate. That was not enough and I was hungry.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/23 04:17 AM
4

Then all the cases I've listed fall under protection umbrella imv.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/23 02:40 AM
-1

Lol, I see your point of view.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/23 02:39 AM
1

Not in a college, but I do see lots of different ages in different age groups in relationships.
/r/AllPillDebate05/10/23 02:38 AM
1

Well, he's Asian and he's kind of big. Was really skinny when we met though.
/r/AllPillDebate05/10/23 02:34 AM
–

The job I quitted on the first day - animator for kids in a "professions town". Basically a huge part of a shopping center turned into a street with different rooms for different professions. It. Was. Loud. The music wouldn't shut up and from time to time you'd get a fake firefighters' car going with all the sounds. I can't stand loud noises. Oh, also I've played a fairy for kids on an event lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/23 01:02 AM
0

So...what is yours?
/r/AllPillDebate05/10/23 01:01 AM
-1

Some people can't even feel the attraction from the first sight. It's never happened to me and I know some people like this, both men and women.
/r/AllPillDebate05/10/23 01:00 AM
4

Do you count only physical protection? I offered my friend to couch surf because I knew his household was abusive. My cousin just called the police when she saw that a guy was getting beaten up on the street. At school girls would stop boys from bullying one guy who was always getting pinches/slaps etc. In a global sense of the word I helped my husband to stay safe by relocating in a hurry and spending most of our savings on it. Left everything and everyone. Tbh I haven't seen a lot of examples …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/23 01:00 AM
3

Eh, it's on them. I am not going to finance other women's exploitation.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/23 12:52 AM
–

Yeah, I can imagine that even splitting it 50/50 leaves both of you with little time to spare.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/23 12:51 AM
2

It could, but as I've said women just don't really have to. I think with more shift in our attitude towards gender roles, we could see the change.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/10/23 12:51 AM
1

Do you really see only men like this dating?
/r/AllPillDebate05/10/23 12:50 AM
0

Past is a predictor for the future, but it isn't given that you or they won't change. Things can always change, both to the better and worse. You can stick so you could at least check and give yourself a chance.
/r/AllPillDebate05/10/23 12:33 AM
-4

How many women really have these things listen in their bios?
/r/AllPillDebate05/10/23 12:32 AM
3

Cool, but women generally just don't have to do it.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 11:28 PM
3

There are women who are okay with it, but they might be a minority.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 11:23 PM
-3

Well, I suspect some of them are still at school.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 11:19 PM
-1

The thing is there are quite a lot of men who fit the definition. I failed to develop any attraction to them though. I can appreciate the appearance but it doesn't make me want to date them.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 11:19 PM
–

Good for you. Do you keep in touch with your ex-wife? Does she take kids or weekends? How old are your kids? Single parenthood is not a joke and it does eat up most of your time and money.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 11:11 PM
-6

Okay, I've never been into guys who were above 6ft. Husband is just a bit shorter, sure, but my school crush was around 5'7 I guess. It's not that I'm resentful towards "Chads" - I've never approached them or been in relationships with them to get any bad experience. My husband is attractive, but not 6ft and he's Asian which is a big no for guys here.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 11:03 PM
-12

Not really, because you guys can't agree on it.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 11:01 PM
-4

Suicidal ideation is a good reason to get on therapy. It can take time to find the right therapist and approach for yourself, but it's worthy it. Also, please, don't be in a hurry to die. Things can change, you never know where you find yourself in 10 or 20 years.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 10:50 PM
-7

What's your definition of a Chad?
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 10:49 PM
22

No? The risks are too high and I don't think someone else could pick a partner for me better than I can.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 10:48 PM
1

I think you wanted to reply to the OP, as it isn't my claim.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 10:34 PM
1

If she knows and she's okay with teaching a bit, she can be patient with him.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 10:32 PM
–

I'd say women generally are far more involved into their close ones' problems and lives overall. I.e. if my friend has a serious issue, I'm going to hear them out and offer ways to solve it and my help as much as I can. I offered several friends to couch surf, I lent them money, I searched for apartments and jobs with them etc. It's the same with my mother and our family and her friends - if she can help practically, she will. If she's worried about someone's well-being and she can offer advice,…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 10:06 PM
5

I am not sure that advice can help people who don't want to take actions. A big number of young men don't approach women, what kind of help do they need?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 09:59 PM
0

Did you want to post it as a main comment?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 09:58 PM
0

Some men are. It isn't really gendered, both genders can exploit and use each other. I clearly don't think my partner is ugly. I'm not sure my friend thought her ex was ugly either, she admitted he had "peculiar appearance", but she didn't call him ugly. I think he was...below average.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 09:57 PM
1

Sorry, your comment got under other replies. I usually reply to all replies sooner or later though.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 09:53 PM
1

You can increase your chances by not limiting your dating pool to a small number of women. You still have low chances, because there must be some reasons why you've been struggling with dating in the first place.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 09:53 PM
0

Eh, I'm not sure that it's because men are scarier. There's just less touch-able appeal imv. I don't feel anything looking at shirtless men.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 09:52 PM
3

It depends on a woman and whether she knows that he has no experience or not.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 09:51 PM
2

From what I've seen in the drawing community, both men and women tend to draw women more than men. Also I think the amount of art around women's bodies and beauty do influence our attitude towards it.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 08:59 PM
0

You have an interesting way to read other's comments. Men tell white lies too btw. It's pretty much the norm of human communication and people on the spectrum often struggle with communication because they can't recognize or practice it.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 08:58 PM
–

Are you into BDSM at all?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 07:12 PM
3

I am...not sure about it. I think we're conditioned to find women more attractive just because there's so much emphasis on women's appearance and women's body. Most art depicting people in an appealing and attractive way shows women. I like drawing and I generally enjoy drawing women, there's also more materials to study for drawing women and more artists of both genders drawing women. I'm demi so I don't feel sexual attraction to strangers, but women more often make me want to touch them becaus…
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 06:36 PM
2

I'm not happy - I'm talking about the statistics and probability. If you struggle with dating and attracting anyone, limiting your dating pool to very narrow sample isn't the wisest decision. You can stick to your preference, but there's little advice around it.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 06:32 PM
–

Sorry for being intrusive, but it's really curious. Can you get off only from spanking, i.e. without touching yourself?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 06:27 PM
–

They forget the most important part - why would anyone settle for a partner who wasn't treating them well? The reasons why people do that are more important than their partners' reasoning.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 05:11 PM
–

Being spanked or spanking yourself? Also is it your main way to get off?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 05:10 PM
5

My husband: He has determination. If he decided to do something, he'll put all his efforts into it. He's intelligent and he has passions of his own. I like listening to him talking about certain interests of his that I don't really share/dive in that deep. He's good at bed and he values my pleasure. I get my climax every time we have sex and sometimes not just once. He has good communication skills. He can get along with most people. He has the ability to self-reflect and be introspective. He ca…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 05:07 PM
–

Sometimes.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 04:58 PM
–

What's your fetish?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 04:56 PM
–

Tbh I see this mistake mostly from men here. "Women aren't empathetic to male struggles" often means "they don't agree with me".
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 04:55 PM
5

Interesting, a lack of textbook is a new concept for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 04:49 PM
1

Is it hard to find textbooks that were written prior the popularization of gender studies?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 04:38 PM
1

I'll repost a part of the Russian article about DT traits. I'm not the author. The link between attractive facial features and DT traits is weak and partial, there is only limited confirmation for the link with narcissism, but not for Machiavellianism or psychopathy. Shiramizu V. K. M. et al. 2019 Most studies use self-reports to form pools of individuals with DT traits, i.e. in the testing set they include photos of the people identified as carriers of the DT traits according to their results t…
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 04:37 PM
21

The difference is that there are less women advocating for cuffing men to reduce their physical strength than there are men who advocate for subjugating women. So the response is widely different. When some women propose some extreme actions, they do get ridiculed. I wonder whether you see everything contradicting your own point of view as "ideology based". When men complain that they're lonely, they get better responses than when they complain about a lack of sex. Of course, there's the issue o…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 04:12 PM
2

People are bad at being supportive. Women don't get better responses from men either, we all have to learn to actively listen and be supportive and caring.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 04:07 PM
1

It's the same with ugly - don't use the word ugly and don't do it unprompted. I'm not sure why it's hard to understand. Also as I've said in the beginning there are "romance goggles". You tend to see your partner prettier than they are.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 04:06 PM
1

Have I ever said anything about low esteem? I think she just thought he was a good possible partner but it didn't turn out great when she got to know him closer and spent more time with him. They are not compatible and the dude has to go a long way on therapy before he could hold a health LTR. She didn't lie, as she asked for advice considering it because she had zero experience and didn't know what was normal and not. It was not normal at all.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 04:05 PM
0

Have no idea about his penis, but sex wasn't good at all. He's also on a shorter side, average/below-average face and broke. And mental issues. He looked...okay-ish from the start, but it got ugly pretty fast.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 03:56 PM
1

I was talking more in lines "do I look fat". Lying why you're dating someone is different from not calling your partner ugly.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 03:55 PM
27

It is a part of the reason. In manosphere and among incels there are quite a lot of men claiming that women's rights are detrimental to them or to society overall and they should be taken away. Rhetoric like this generally puts people on guard and sometimes we can associate less extreme takes and views with the same outcome. Some men claim they just want to be heard and sympathized with...but is it really helpful to their lack of sex/casual sex? Isn't it just the first step to get some kind of s…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 03:52 PM
1

Noo, by resources I mean resources in general. She helped him financially, helped him to cope with his mental issues and generally he started heavily relying on her. Nah, she'd been single for years prior to that. I guess she's gonna stay single for quite some time again as this experience was...overwhelmingly unpleasant.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 02:55 PM
0

Human communication includes lots of white lies, being always totally honest isn't viable. You should be honest about important things and you shouldn't lie just for your own benefit. But as I've said unpromptedly saying that your partner is ugly is just rude.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 02:53 PM
-2

Eh, the dude got more resources from my friend than vice versa. I'm not sure why she dated him in the first place.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 02:49 PM
0

Unpromptedly saying "you know, I find you ugly" is just rude imv. Comments about appearance should be either positive or asked for.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 01:58 PM
2

I think there are some heavy "romantic" goggles. If you're fond of your partner, you find them more attractive than other people do. My friend dated a guy who was a bit...lower on appearance, but I don't think she's ever told him that. Why go out of your way to upset a person who you love?
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 01:42 PM
1

It seems that they do want to date...but they don't know how and they don't want to approach.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 01:40 PM
1

Changes in social norms + higher isolation and anxiety levels in young people.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 12:46 PM
1

It is a highjacked term, it also used to mean the emotional labor service workers have to perform for customers. Men themselves complain about being "emotional tampons" for women, but this role isn't really gendered, both genders do it. It becomes a problem if it's unregulated and a person doesn't have any other coping mechanisms. Pouring every grievance onto your partner gets overbearing very fast.
/r/AllPillDebate04/10/23 12:45 PM
1

I'm sorry?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/10/23 12:43 PM
1

An individual doesn't really care about evolutional success of their species. Men approach not because they don't want humans to extinct, but because they want to date and have sex.
/r/AllPillDebate03/10/23 08:03 PM
1

We're returning to the same conversation we already had - it's on men to solve men's issues. Women can help and be allies, but women won't initiate the changes or form the movement for men. Just as heterosexual people didn't form LGBTQ+ movement or men didn't form feminism. It sucks, but it is what it is. The group who experiences issues has to push for changes. It seems there are not enough men willing to do the job though. They don't want to risk their social standing and their livelihood for …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/23 06:17 PM
1

It does root from our general attitude towards people's emotions and then it gets worse due to gender roles. Women talk about men not being able to be caring/supportive pretty often. Also the stereotype that men are uncaring and deaf to women's issue is pretty common too.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/23 06:14 PM
1

Emotional labor is a very poor term. It was supposed to contain both emotional and mental labor. I.e. taking care of your close ones' mental well-being and managing and micromanaging the household. Some examples: listening to him vent into you all the time because he doesn't have ways to deal with his negative emotions, remembering about everyone's schedules and deadlines, being the only one who remembers and does grocery shopping, reminding your husband to pick up the kid from school because he…
/r/AllPillDebate03/10/23 06:11 PM
1

Vicious circle as I've said. Neither gender can solve the issue on their own - women can't just change the way they view men's vulnerability over night, there should be some practice in real life. Men can't change over night either.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/23 06:07 PM
1

Sometimes. Sometimes it leads to things I've mentioned.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/23 06:04 PM
1

It doesn't have to be this way, but I also don't think that people are cut out for life-long monogamy either. Some can make it work, but probably not most people.
/r/AllPillDebate03/10/23 06:02 PM
0

Oh, the answer is simple - men do it because they want to date. No one forces them, they can stop doing these things as long as they're okay with the outcome.
/r/AllPillDebate03/10/23 06:01 PM
1

As I've said I think both sides are part of the issue, plus, there's a third side - how we generally treat emotions and how most people can't really tolerate others' vulnerability and be there for them. I think it's social expectations. The stereotype that women are more emotional and men are stoic "rocks" is still very common.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/23 06:00 PM
1

I think both sides have things to work on - men have to learn healthy ways to deal with their emotions and be open about it, women have to learn to accept men's emotions. Everyone has to learn to deal with their emotions and emotions of others as well, as I wouldn't say that men are that great with accepting women's vulnerability either. On their own women don't have much motivation to change their ways nor they'll get much practice. Men on their own will struggle with finding a partner who can …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/23 05:58 PM
1

I think it's a cycle - there's the expectation that men are supposed to be "rocks" and it affects both men and women. Men tend not to develop healthy coping mechanisms and women don't treat men's attempt fairly reinforcing the cycle.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/23 05:55 PM
–

Roommates chronicles: Guys are on a diet. Yesterday they bought some junk food. Me: "I don't think you should get it too often, it's too greasy" Roommate girl: "Why the FUCK did you buy this? You are not going to eat it and don't buy it anymore!" It's interesting to see the difference in communication.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/23 02:00 PM
2

I think both genders do it pretty often, but we tend to face and deal mostly the cases from the opposite gender. Sure, women's low tolerance towards men's vulnerability is part of overall problem. By "awkward" I mean not the right time or place. Like a guy who you've just met tells you his whole dating history and how all his exes were bitches and all women "want just one thing". Or on a group language lesson a guy starts talking about his body dysmorphia issues which he did get some positive re…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/23 12:39 PM
4

Women low tolerance for men's vulnerability is also part of the issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/23 12:38 PM
2

It does happen pretty often, but I think we can't evaluate the difference among genders because we usually don't date our own gender.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/23 12:38 PM
2

It makes sense because things aren't black and white. Hierarchy usually has multiple steps and most people really were subjugated by the ruling class during most of our written history. Peasants weren't equal to the elites, it doesn't make them inherently worse or less valuable and we could argue that they were, in fact, more valuable as they provided most of the labor force.
/r/AllPillDebate03/10/23 12:37 PM
1

I'd marry a divorced man only if I was divorced myself. Otherwise I just don't want to deal with his previous marriage, kids etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/23 12:36 PM
2

There is common sense thing. You usually don't share your traumatic experience with people you've just met, for example.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/23 12:35 PM
4

I think both things true. On average men have harder times openning up partially due to the response they get. Women have harder times accepting vulnerable men partially due to the expectations and narrative in the society as well. It's a vicious circle - men are supposed to be stoic, they're expected to be stoic and we see it as a norm, then when men try to break from toxic behavioral patterns, we don't welcome it because we're used to expectations and patterns hence we reaffirm then.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/23 12:34 PM
0

What do you mean by courting? I've never had casual sex and my husband and I waited for a few months before we started getting intimate. But I'm demi, so I can't really just "jump into bed" with someone.
/r/AllPillDebate03/10/23 01:33 AM
8

It's part of the issue - they bottle up until it pours or causes other relationship problems.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/23 01:30 AM
7

I think the entire stereotype that men trauma-dump stems from men not being able to share their feelings and worries in an appropriate context and way because they don't really practice that and because they see their partner as the only outlet.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/23 12:54 AM
1

I think...it's a pretty popular opinion, no? People look down on polygamous units raising kids.
/r/AllPillDebate03/10/23 12:53 AM
3

Most people were subjugated during most of our written history. Do you think there was some inherit difference between elites and peasants?
/r/AllPillDebate03/10/23 12:52 AM
17

I don't think we can objectively measure that, as it mostly relies on one's personal experience and bias lens. It isn't like that in my personal experience - I've met more men who did a very awkward and not time/context-appropriate trauma-dumping or just couldn't handle their emotions in a productive way than women. I also know more women who can articulate their emotions and concerns in a way appropriate for the situation. But it might be because I know more women closely and due to my social c…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/10/23 12:28 AM
3

It is a way to see it, I guess. Monogamy gives a better structure for society and a better environment to raise kids. We don't have to be patriarchal to be monogamous.
/r/AllPillDebate02/10/23 11:48 PM
10

I wouldn't marry a divorced man in the first place and if he lied about it, it's a valid reason to divorce him. On another note, why would I marry or date a man who wasn't treating me well? It's utterly ridiculous.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/23 11:46 PM
1

What do you mean by losers?
/r/AllPillDebate02/10/23 09:53 PM
2

There are biological differences that bring heavy disadvantages to women - we get pregnant and we're physically weaker. It sets us aside in society prioritizing physical strength and that doesn't have reliable forms of birth control. If you want to return to happier times, you have to reject not just the idea of human rights, but also Industrial Revolution and Agricultural Revolution. People did have much simpler and maybe even happier lives before we accidently prioritized evolutional success o…
/r/AllPillDebate02/10/23 09:35 PM
–

What's the issue?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/23 02:57 PM
–

Racists?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/23 02:57 PM
–

I think it depends more on one's social circle and age group than gender. I've seen women rooting for other women and supporting them and I've seen the opposite as well. It's true for men too. I worked in mostly female collective and it wasn't really like anything you here about it. We got along pretty well, although, sure, we also didn't have to spend much time together considering we were teachers and administrators so most of our days were spent within a classroom with students. From the othe…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/23 01:38 PM
–

Ohh, that's uncomfortable.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/23 01:31 PM
–

It's great to have good in-laws.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/23 01:31 PM
–

FiL wrote to husband that he'd done the right choice and that my mother is a wonderful woman after meeting her. That feels nice. I get along perfectly with his father, I wish I could say the same about his mother, although these days she can't help but appreciate me we started on a very rough ground.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/10/23 12:44 PM
1

Because I was in the place of this girl and I know that it's highly uncomfortable experience. Hopefully we'll have kids one day and I don't want to see adult men approaching minors to be normalized.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 04:49 PM
3

A woman, married, late 20s.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 03:51 PM
2

She still looks like a minor. Men targeting minors are creeps.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 02:50 PM
1

Nope, she looks like she's 16.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 02:35 PM
–

I'm curious about your logic here, can you try to explain it?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 01:54 PM
6

She does look like a minor, she's pretty young to me. Also looking and showing that you're uncomfortable helps to communicate that you are in fact uncomfortable. As I've said she might want to share or she might want to increase her audience, as videos like this get a lot of engagement and views. How many comments are there saying he's a serial killer?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 01:52 PM
–

Sure, but I don't really have the curves that are "in" currently. It doesn't bother me, but these days it is probably a negative feature.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 01:50 PM
–

That might be the case.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 01:43 PM
–

I'm short and still built like a teenager.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 01:43 PM
12

She's acting nervous. She hasn't called police or screamed, she just showed that he was uncomfortable with him. What's wrong with that? She hasn't. The dude's face isn't even in the video, so most likely it won't affect him in the slightest. Just as women should deal with men approaching them, we all should deal with the risks of being filmed in our everyday interactions. One of downsides of the Internet and social medias I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 01:40 PM
–

Okay, it isn't something I've really seen in real life. Why do you think it's happening to you? Why looking at you hurts their ego?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 01:39 PM
–

Both partners decide.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 01:37 PM
–

Sure? Vetting is an important part of the process, but you also might be into "mentally unstable and temperamental" if every girl you're dating is like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 01:33 PM
6

So...he probably is high which isn't something that everyone is comfortable or should be comfortable with. Do you think she's scared for her life? Content like this does bring views and engagement, so maybe she wanted to share, maybe she wants to grow her audience. Women have higher neuroticism level, but so do men who think that women will call police on them for approaching.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 01:31 PM
–

Neither gender "controls" sex. Women have more options, men have less options, but a woman can't just demand sex from a man, both partners have to consent. And you keep ignoring the fact that tossing morals out for money doesn't have to be sex-related.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 01:28 PM
–

I'm sorry, what? Are you staring at random women on the street? We usually don't keep an eye contact with strangers, because it can be misinterpreted as invitation to talk.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 01:25 PM
15

Why shouldn't she be in public? It's okay to be nervous being approached just as it's okay to approach and take your risks. We have no idea how he looked like and he sounds drunk/high.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 01:23 PM
–

More men are willing to have sex with more women, sure. But tossing out morals for money isn't linked solely to sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 01:16 PM
–

What do you mean by it?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 01:09 PM
–

I don't think it's gendered really.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 01:05 PM
–

Good boy!
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 01:04 PM
–

Just admit you've made a mistake lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 01:02 PM
22

She looks like a minor and he sounds drunk. She looks uncomfortable from the start, he's saying "I won't interrupt" by interrupting her. lol. On a side note, she didn't show his face, so...how is he affected by all of it? It's not that he's getting arrested or shamed in face for what he's done. We don't even know how he looks like.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 01:01 PM
–

I think you're mixing 2 users here.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 12:53 PM
–

I assume she wanted to keep cover for kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 12:52 PM
–

"Divorce or open marriage after cheating" Ughh, I hope the dude gets totally fucked up in divorce. Cheaters should suffer.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 04:33 AM
–

Suuure.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 04:32 AM
2

Maybe gold diggers? Especially if they predate on guys who are unaware about the true intentions. Although I'm not sure how many men are that level of naïve. But people generally don't like seeing relationships like this and they sometimes view them as predatory. A more clear equivalent is older women dating much younger guys - people might not mind when it's casual, but if/when it's about marriage and having kids, a woman usually gets called different names.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 04:31 AM
–

That's how people get doxxed.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 04:28 AM
–

I wonder whether there are any support/help groups for people like that. "I'm Amy, I'm 32 and I've never had friends" or something.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/09/23 04:24 AM
2

Most women aren't single mothers. Also can you provide a source for your claim? I'm curious to see just what share of single mother's children ends up as criminals. Also most issues linked to single motherhood are issues of poverty, not just single mothers'. Lots of women live on their own. If you think they're all bankrolled by men, you might have a very interesting social circle around you or most likely you need to reduce the amount of time you spend online. Billionaires and such generally co…
/r/AllPillDebate30/09/23 04:22 AM
1

We're talking about men who do have options.
/r/AllPillDebate30/09/23 04:19 AM
2

They have low stats for crime committing, addictions, being homeless etc. Most of them work, can take care of themselves and others. The tax thing probably can be explained by the bunch of extremely high-earning men who outdo pretty much everyone and by the fact that there are more single mothers than single fathers. They take resources for their kids, as it would cost more for the state to keep orphanages.
/r/AllPillDebate30/09/23 12:06 AM
2

I'd be curious to see any kind of objective support to your claim considering that most women are functioning adults. Just as most men are. What's "awful" about them in your view?
/r/AllPillDebate29/09/23 11:50 PM
4

People tend to use the vocabulary and phrases common in their social group, it's one of the ways to signal that you're a part of this group in the first place. You can it happening it in this sub too, as incels themselves have a bunch of specific jargon: "-maxxing", "cope", "it's over", "rope" etc.
/r/AllPillDebate29/09/23 10:16 PM
8

Putting someone on a pedestal often ends up with you flipping completely and starting hating/devaluing them, because in your view they didn't fulfil your own standards and fantasy, hence they deserve your disgust/hatred. Women are just people - some are great, some are awful, most fall somewhere in-between the extremes.
/r/AllPillDebate29/09/23 10:13 PM
1

What's bare minimum about having a partner? The details depend on one's preferences.
/r/AllPillDebate29/09/23 09:50 PM
1

What is special to you? Also, well, these things are special enough for people to strive for and for others complain how they can't achieve it. It isn't everyone's cup of tea, of course.
/r/AllPillDebate29/09/23 08:33 PM
1

It's an individual thing. If he's on a traditional side and from a traditional community, he shouldn't have any issues with finding a partner unless he has some kind of handicap.
/r/AllPillDebate29/09/23 08:21 PM
–

It depends on the stats, I've seen some studies showing similar rates for men and women. u/Maffioze can probably share the links.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 04:38 PM
1

Depends on a man clearly.
/r/AllPillDebate29/09/23 04:37 PM
-1

If he has enough options, he has options to choose form, doesn't he? It doesn't really matter whether some women scream about it or not, it doesn't change his situation. In the same way a woman who has options doesn't have to listen to men being angry with it.
/r/AllPillDebate29/09/23 04:36 PM
–

Interesting.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 04:15 PM
1

Did you want to reply to someone's comment?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 04:15 PM
1

If a man is on a more traditional side or even just has this preference and he is a HVM, he has some options to choose from.
/r/AllPillDebate29/09/23 04:14 PM
–

Eh...some women do learn to be abusive though. We just don't talk about it as much.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 04:13 PM
–

What about the US and European countries?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 03:49 PM
–

So do we live under patriarchy then?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 03:44 PM
–

Abusers often come from abusive households, so chances are high that yeah, someone did fail him. Abusive behavior and tendencies aren't the norm, people generally don't expose them. You're way too young for all of it and you probably should do more reading first.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 03:37 PM
1

I'm demi, so in order to develop any kind of romantic attraction I need to have emotional connection first. It's a rather rare event (happened around 3 times in my life) and it usually includes being in close proximity to someone with similar interests or someone who has a great passion for something and they just want to share about it and them being able to be vulnerable with me and open up to me. So basically I usually fall for my friends which isn't a very good or practical thing really. Eve…
/r/AllPillDebate29/09/23 03:35 PM
-8

For most women a "HVM" is a man who is a great long-term partner. So if a man is interested in marriage and having kids and he has some good options to choose from, he's getting a good wife and partner. Depending on whether he's more on a traditional or egalitarian side he gets either a homemaker or a working partner sharing responsibilities with him.
/r/AllPillDebate29/09/23 03:18 PM
4

To check this nice funfiction in real life, you'd have to observe relationships of multiple women with average and highly attractive men. It should be the same women as well and they shouldn't be aware about the experiment. I'm really not sure it's possible to fulfil in real life though.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 03:09 PM
–

I'm not calling him to fix the problem, I'm calling him to meet the actor lol. I would never view his offer as something serious, it's 100% a prank, hence it isn't even a problem. Just a fun experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 03:08 PM
–

Did you mean remind you on weekend?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 03:07 PM
–

I'd consider it's a prank and called my husband to look at Henry Cavill and real life and maybe take some pictures. Neither of us are fans of him, but it would be a fun story to tell others.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 03:01 PM
–

Too much sugar.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 02:59 PM
–

I don't think so. You can tell that a person doesn't have much experience if they're very nervous and awkward with the opposite gender, but it doesn't necessarily mean that they're virgins.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 02:59 PM
–

I'm curious whether you'll ever get to counting the comments under my post. You could see that not all men, in fact, operate like you do.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/09/23 02:51 PM
1

Quite a lot of people want to marry. I'm not sure why the stereotype is that men have to be forced into marriage, when I've seen quite a lot of men trying to "catch" their partners into one.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 08:50 PM
2

Tbh depression and anxiety to the point of one being unable to work are serious issues. Sorry for pocking around, but did this shit show happen/started close to her menopause? Hormonal fluctuations often make mental issues harder to deal with. I have no idea how a capable and sane adult can be "talked into" cheating. Oh. So there were examples of "scrubbing clean" prior, she just didn't include you into her scrubbing list. That...doesn't sound healthy really and it sounds like an awful base to b…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 04:25 PM
2

Tbh it sounds like some untreated mental issue. It's really hard to believe that a sane person who has been a good partner for years would turn into that overnight.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 04:15 PM
1

Depends on a virgin and the ages. People usually seek partners with similar beliefs. I've meant problem as "it's on them to try to achieve that". It isn't on women to keep their virginity so a guy could fulfil his kink.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 02:03 PM
1

I think the conclusion here should be different one - don't stick to men (or women) who are insecure.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 02:02 PM
1

Two hermits found each other! It's great that it works for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 02:02 PM
1

Not sure about ditching porn, but there would be far less of it under conservative morals.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 02:01 PM
2

Her justification of her actions makes no sense tbh. How are you doing these days?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 02:00 PM
3

I'm glad that you don't have to communicate with them anymore.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 01:59 PM
1

Dr Laura? As I've said these were common beliefs in the culture I was growing up, but not in my family. Not even in my ethnicity's culture.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 01:58 PM
2

It is. Everyone should take care of themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 01:57 PM
2

It's absolutely awful and it's infuriating that he went away with a fine.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 02:56 AM
2

That is an absolute shit show and I'm sorry you had to go through it. Was she stable prior her decision? How was your marriage overall?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 02:54 AM
1

I have to read more on the topic from a less biased author, but it would make sense that women would reject Christian values to fight for their rights, as Christianity does put women below men.
/r/AllPillDebate28/09/23 01:52 AM
6

What the hell, I am so sorry! I hope you've cut contact with him.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 01:47 AM
7

Well, with the attitude "men don't have to cook or clean", it doesn't lessen the burden really, but if you both contribute equally, yes, it can make things easier.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 01:46 AM
9

Ughh, nothing of it sounds reasonable.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 12:23 AM
2

Why did you divorce? What was the division prior your marriage?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 12:13 AM
3

You don't have to be upset to find insults unacceptable. I'm neither far or promiscuous, but I don't like people using these words as insults anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 12:12 AM
32

You shouldn't make more than your man/be more educated/show that you know more than he does or can do something better than he can Men are providers Men can't be trusted with cooking/cleaning/childcare Women's sole goal and purpose is to get married and have kids Abortion isn't an option Women have sex for men's sake and sex isn't enjoyable for them Men are less emotional/men are more rational Men are more responsible Men can't be victims of sexual violence or domestic abuse "If he hits you, he …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/09/23 12:11 AM
5

People use it with the intention to insult someone. Like "fat" is a neutral word, but lots of people use it as an insult hence it associates with an insult.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 10:57 PM
4

I think it might be more common among younger guys, but I've seen some bragging about their lays, sharing nudes they got etc. It's a low behavior and most people are able to recognize it, but it isn't that rare among young men.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 10:47 PM
1

Maybe you need to read it again.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 10:42 PM
2

People tend to end up with partners with similar experience. Also if men want to sleep around and marry a virgin, it's their problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 10:07 PM
–

Both? More options.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 10:04 PM
–

Sure, but it's an example of cherry picking. You got enough comments from women saying they'd be fine with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 10:03 PM
5

Maybe because these words are used as insults.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 10:02 PM
–

Can you give an example?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 10:00 PM
3

It's different for men and women, it doesn't mean we should praise one group and shame the other. In terms of morality it's the same thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 09:59 PM
–

I like that you ignored my comment saying I'd be okay and that I did subsidize my husband when we weren't married yet.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 09:51 PM
7

I don't view having a preference for n-count as a slutshaming really. You can have a preference and don't call people not fitting it names.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 08:54 PM
–

Sexes could probably remain even with a missing chromosome. But chances are high human species won't survive that long to see the outcome anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 08:53 PM
–

a) It was a joke and b) the dude is talking about chromosomes.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 08:52 PM
–

What do you mean by "ignore"?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 08:51 PM
–

Because Y chromosome has been shrinking for ages now and there are some chances that it will disappear in the future if human kind makes it so long.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 08:26 PM
–

Maybe visit to the doctor is needed.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 08:11 PM
–

The problem with RP advice is that it's a mix of common sense stuff and some toxic shit. RP doesn't have the patent for common sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 08:10 PM
13

That's a wild claim. Lots of men enjoy casual sex, most men enjoy some premarital sex and the opportunity to date and be intimate without marrying your first partner. Very few men would want to return to strict sexual conservatism.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 08:09 PM
8

To current morals. I don't want to "ride the cock carousel", but I find the line of thinking "it's okay for men to sleep around but not for women" just morally and logically inconsistent.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 08:08 PM
23

I'd guess the argument is against praising men for that and shaming women for the same. Ideally we wouldn't really assign any moral value to having sex. Outside of certain context it isn't either praise-worthy or shame-deserving.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 07:07 PM
–

What have you started recently?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 07:02 PM
–

I have the strongest preference here - I'm into my husband's dick, I ain't fucking no other person. On a serious note, I guess if I didn't feel it at all or it was way too big to fit and was hurting all the time, it could be a potential dealbreaker.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 07:01 PM
2

I'd be curious to see any kind of proof to your theory that is more objective than "trust me".
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 06:57 PM
5

If it's your only game, you have no game whatsoever.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 06:03 PM
1

It sounds like he should deal with it on his own then.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 05:47 PM
1

Does he do the organizing himself?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 05:40 PM
1

For a good reason, isn't it?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 05:39 PM
2

I'm glad it worked out for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 05:26 PM
3

I think divorce can make it worse for all parties, but if at least one of the partners decided they wanted a divorce, I'm not sure their marriage is/was worth saving in the first place. I.e. it's a wrong decision, but you can't really do much about it at this point. Couple therapy prior to divorce could be a good measure, but, unfortunately, too many couples don't really discuss their issues and listen to each other, so when one decides to opt out, they're already all burnt out. Some reasons for…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 05:26 PM
3

Female, 25, We have 3 boys and I am pregnant with our 4th child You don't waste your time!
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 05:20 PM
2

I feel inadequate without bringing in money.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 05:20 PM
1

Do you plan on cohabitating?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 05:19 PM
4

It makes sense. I hope it will work out for you in the long run.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 05:04 PM
2

How many kids do you have and plan to have? I'm curious with forever SAHM situation as the time goes on. Would you want to return to work when kids are teenagers?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 05:03 PM
1

Do you think you should take up more tracking stuff?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 05:01 PM
2

It seems you're shouldering the mental load which can be exhausting over time. I hope you'll see some improvement in the future.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 05:00 PM
1

What do you think about hiring a cleaner?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 04:58 PM
3

I'm not satisfied with being a SAHW. Can relate to it. I played this role for a month or two and it drove me crazy.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 04:57 PM
1

How much time do you work and spend on chores and childcare compared to your partner?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 04:56 PM
1

You're more on a traditional side if I remember correctly, aren't you?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 04:56 PM
5

He thinks that women should not, in fact, view push and pull game as a red flag while I disagree with him.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 04:55 PM
1

As a vivid example, the researchers describe a male team member who was perceived as the slacker of the team and the main focus of negative gossip. It turns out that he was uniformly rated physically ugly by the other members of the team. In contrast was another member of the team, who worked so hard that there were discussions of him as a possible contender for the U.S. Olympic team. This guy was rated by everyone on the team as physically attractive. The most interesting thing is that this lar…
/r/AllPillDebate27/09/23 04:54 PM
2

Not really? People marry to make the state and others see and treat them as one family unit. So far marriage is the only thing that can achieve that.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 04:01 PM
18

Pull and push strategy is basically cold and hot game which can work short-term and/or with people who have insecure attachment style. Women who don't fall for this strategy either aren't up to playing the game or they seek secure and stable relationships and both reasons are reasonable imv. On a side note not all people can experience pure raw physical attraction from the go, some need time and get to know each other. I'd guess the majority of women need some time to develop deep attraction, al…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 03:56 PM
2

Find the source for that number.
/r/AllPillDebate27/09/23 03:52 PM
2

That's because the latter number is the number of false paternity rate for couples who actually did the test. The lower number is for general crowd.
/r/AllPillDebate27/09/23 03:00 PM
1

Read the article.
/r/AllPillDebate27/09/23 01:43 PM
0

Which is less than half the cases. Plus, 40% of tests being false still doesn't mean that 40% of suspicions are correct - only that 40% of suspicions strong enough to make one go and take the test were correct.
/r/AllPillDebate27/09/23 01:41 PM
0

Because...they had suspicions. Either they knew about cheating or had a very good reason to suspect that.
/r/AllPillDebate27/09/23 12:44 PM
0

Not really. People who seek tests most likely either a) unsure who the father is (including a woman herself) or b) have very strong reasons to suspect false paternity.
/r/AllPillDebate27/09/23 12:27 PM
1

Sure, they should be freed from their child support.
/r/AllPillDebate27/09/23 12:26 PM
–

I think it's stopped working with all this 3d parties nonsense.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 04:48 AM
1

As long as our lifestyles were compatible - sure, no issues with it. I'd say it's a better variant than him having to bankroll me because I can't afford his level of comfort. It would raise my brow if we didn't move to a shared budget over time and closer to marriage though. But to be fair I didn't go this route with my husband, when we started living together. We were both broke students but I had my rent paid by my mother and had more help from her, later I also started working full-time soone…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 04:38 AM
–

Does reveddit work?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/23 04:30 AM
1

Read the article I've provided.
/r/AllPillDebate27/09/23 04:27 AM
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