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Snevitje Archive

View 0 posts and 73 comments by Snevitje on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

I don't let doors fall shut in people's faces, either. It's just being decent. I'm not a fan of enforcing gender roles, that's all.
/r/MensRights14/12/15 02:10 PM
1

Well you did. I don't know why you said it either. Men open doors for women. That's just something we do in western society. I don't know why in the world you would complain about that as a trans woman. Those instances are men accepting you as a woman. So you should feel happy about that. But I wouldn't complain about that! I don't think anyone of any gender owes me any traditionalist gallantry, but yes, it's affirming. I said "raped and mugged" to point out that, if those things happen, then su…
/r/MensRights14/12/15 01:49 PM
1

Uh, yes you did mention opening doors for you and you edited it out of your comment... I honestly can't remember that, nor why I would mention it. People don't seem to be opening doors for me any more or any less than they used to. It's not something that would bother me. And maybe some whites have joked about you (can't imagine them doing it to your face, though) and I do not believe any whites screamed at you or threatened you. Unless you were walking around a trailer park or something. Ordina…
/r/MensRights14/12/15 01:37 PM
1

Eh, you really don't have to live in the middle of a civil war to be assaulted. Not that I'm all that worried myself, but it's a common enough experience. It doesn't have to be a daily occurrence in order to be bad. Not going to get into the race stuff. :/ Never mentioned doors being held open or anything like that... by "special kind of unwelcome attention" I meant people joking about you, screaming at you, threatening you, etc.
/r/MensRights14/12/15 01:21 PM
4

Not going to get all activisty on them and cement the idea of us as domineering intruders. As if I'd even want to go where they'd fear and/or despise me depending on whether I've had a surgery that should change nothing about how scary or despicable I am... if being trans has taught me anything it's that I don't like gender-exlusive stuff. Even if I'm not the one excluded.
/r/MensRights13/12/15 01:56 PM
1

I'm not sure what you're trying to tell me. Race didn't even enter into it and is no concern in my daily life. I listed a subjective feeling of greater safety (compared to women's) as a possible benefit of being a man. You're a little bigger and stronger... you're not taught to be afraid to the same extent... and I assume it's less traumatic/intrusive to get mugged than sexually assaulted - not that one of those only happens to men and the other only to women. This can backfire in the sense that…
/r/MensRights12/12/15 11:20 AM
6

I'm never sure if my transness lets me see this stuff more objectively or if it really just skews my perceptions completely. For example, I was so uncomfortable when I was still living as a(n awkward) man that even the benefits felt like subtle put-downs - a way of saying "you're a man, after all, and yes, we all perceive you as one". Not that I can think of all that many benefits besides not worrying too much about sexual assault and generally feeling safer (even in light of homo-/transphobic h…
/r/MensRights11/12/15 11:34 PM
3

Opposite of trans, also in chemistry and ancient Rome. (Gallia cisalpina, Gallia transalpina depending on which side of the alps it was on)
/r/MensRights26/10/15 02:48 PM
6

Not sure there is a better word than cis, which is literally just the opposite of trans. Heterosexual isn't, and obviously trans people can be hetero-, homo-, and whateversexual. Anyway - all terms are made up. I suppose not all are made up specifically to support a viewpoint. I'm willing to bet that heterosexual gained traction because people were missing a neutral antonym to homosexual, one that didn't contrast it with "normal" (which seems to carry connotations of "correct" or "healthy" to a …
/r/MensRights04/10/15 04:11 PM
13

Reverse stealing: smuggling wares onto a store's shelves...
/r/MensRights17/09/15 08:23 PM
1

Feeling like you're on display and having your appearance judged, possibly by intimidating people you won't trust not to take further liberties. That'd be my educated(-ish) guess. (It's not happened to me; just other sorts of comments. And compliments I didn't consider catcalling.)
/r/MensRights17/09/15 06:17 PM
3

...ick. :/
/r/MensRights14/09/15 08:26 PM
3

I'd probably prefer to leave it blank as well, or say "use whatever pronouns you see fit, but at your own risk :D". At the same time - I remember that when I first spoke to my "trans doctor", he asked me how I'd like to be addressed. I didn't have the self-confidence or -esteem to answer that, but it was the best feeling I had had in a very long time. As for a classroom/college sort of setting, I guess just saying "Feel free to let us know now or in private if we get it wrong and it bothers you.…
/r/MensRights01/09/15 11:43 AM
2

It might have been meant well enough as a step toward a safe and omni-accepting environment. Obviously, not everyone feels secure enough in themselves to be put on the spot like that. Now that I'm "full-time" and "out" (and have been for years) I don't usually have to make those statements; before, I would still have found it hope-crushing to have to point it out.
/r/MensRights31/08/15 10:12 PM
5

Yeah. I wouldn't have come out as trans to an entire class; I generally let people work it out themselves (by eventually looking unignorably different). The alternative, in this case, would have been to actively announce myself with the "hated" name and pronouns instead. Joy.
/r/MensRights31/08/15 08:24 PM
3

It doesn't seem to matter what you post - just where you post it, and that it's scored 3+ (i.e. that it very superficially fits in)
/r/MensRights30/07/15 03:27 AM
1

I'd say parts of culture/society are indeed suggesting that women's value lies to a good degree in beauty. I share this insecurity; I just feel that, as much as I like to point out idiocy, it's ultimately up to me not to let it tyrannize me. Jessica Valenti seems to be very susceptible to social pressure (or social pressure she believes exists) - didn't she say she feels she needs to wear makeup and high heels? But I didn't grow up as a girl and probably experience these things from a somewhat d…
/r/MensRights21/07/15 10:27 AM
4

If you believe that all attractive women are catcalled, then not being catcalled anymore kinda means you're not attractive anymore... ...to men who catcall, who shouldn't be the arbiters of what matters if you despise catcalling. Still, I can empathize with the sentiment to some degree. I'm so used to the idea that all women are sexually harassed that not getting sexually harassed seems to imply that I don't "pass" or don't "count" (trans person here)*. Does that mean I want to be sexually haras…
/r/MensRights20/07/15 04:17 PM
3

I guess it can function as a quiet female pride symbol of some sort, or possibly a counterpart to men 'displaying' their (clothed) genitalia via spread-out postures...? Reading through designer's website isn't helping much so far, except that the design doesn't actually seem to be meant to fight 'manspreading' directly. So what it signifies to the world at large beyond "I'm not ashamed, no matter how little space I may be taking up right now"... I'm not sure.
/r/MensRights19/07/15 11:37 AM
6

What's a suggestive purse design supposed to accomplish (in terms of fighting 'manspreading')? I don't get it.
/r/MensRights19/07/15 11:06 AM
2

Both forms are perfectly cromulent.
/r/MensRights12/07/15 09:06 PM
2

I guess if you're promoting masculinity, it could be called "masculinism"... but not as an analogous term to feminism.
/r/MensRights26/06/15 07:56 AM
6

Then it should be masculism. Masculinism would correspond to femininism, not feminism. :) I don't have the etymology of feminism on hand but Latin femina, not feminina, means woman. Either way: surely meninism is just a joke term...? (Please?)
/r/MensRights25/06/15 08:14 PM
1

And there's just not much that magic going on in day-to-day Middle Earth compared to fantasy video games with their battlemages and overabundant magical artifacts. I'm not saying LOTR should've had a bunch of action heroines or spell-slinging sorceresses, Éowyn notwithstanding. I doubt that would've worked within Tolkien's world-view. It's just that I'd have liked it if more female characters had been involved in or at least affected by it all, behind the scenes or not. The main viewpoint charac…
/r/MensRights01/05/15 10:36 AM
5

It used to bother me that there weren't more - and more substantial - female characters in The Lord of the Rings. It almost seemed as if the population of Middle Earth was 90% male. And then it bothered me that people were so quick to make the affectionate but platonic love and loyalty between Frodo and Sam out to be gay or homoerotic. Because that just wasn't in the text - and men should be "allowed" to form (and deemed capable of forming) deep friendships without requiring sexual attraction. "…
/r/MensRights01/05/15 08:44 AM
1

No, women starting them isn't the first, second or even ninth thing that comes to mind when I think about wars, and not without reason. We don't even have to invoke evolutionary psychology or established power structures or testosterone or anything at all to realize that many more men than women are in the position to start wars - although I doubt women, being human, are somehow innately incapable of it any more than they're incapable of, say, rocket science. A bit of non-historian amateur googl…
/r/MensRights19/04/15 08:23 PM
1

I'm sure most wars are declared by men (and be it simply because most of the power-havers are men). How many wars have you declared, though, or any of the men you know, or the 18+-year-olds who got and still get conscripted into them under threat of imprisonment or execution? What Clinton said seems... heartless to me - or bordering on the nonsensical, especially given how the quote goes on. The women who survive their killed male relatives, as horrible as their lives might be, are the primary v…
/r/MensRights19/04/15 03:54 AM
2

But even if that were true (as in always true), it still wouldn't mean all the men carted off to die in them or else get imprisoned or even executed for cowardice or desertion were therefore instigators of war or even just in a position to instigate war. Every donkey is a mammal, but most mammals aren't donkeys - that sort of thing...
/r/MensRights19/04/15 03:46 AM
1

It's just weird when an entire string of posts attracts repeated downvotes long after the discussion has died down... and you can't even really tell why. (Granted, this isn't a trans forum, but the trans stuff wasn't all that prominent in my first comment. And yes, I overthink everything...)
/r/MensRights15/04/15 09:16 PM
1

I didn't think it was you...
/r/MensRights15/04/15 08:44 PM
1

Someone here seems to be hating me.
/r/MensRights15/04/15 08:30 PM
7

Cuz they're for doing hard manual labour in
/r/MensRights12/04/15 07:16 PM
1

Oh, I'm doing the regular transition thing, have been for a couple years. Imperfect though it may be, I'm at least less miserable than before. I'm very certain about what I want and about what I absolutely can't stand to be!... I'm just less certain that that means anything with regard to what I am. Sigh! Right now I'm trying not to take this stuff so awfully seriously. (But I do usually take things seriously.)
/r/MensRights12/04/15 06:04 PM
1

Are you translucent? That can be a bit of a giveaway
/r/MensRights12/04/15 05:10 PM
0

I hope it works out for you. :) I never really consciously tried to prove myself as a man, although I can't say I "grew up girly", either. To be honest, I'm not sure I am or could be "woman enough"... But then, just being a decent person seems like full-time work already.
/r/MensRights12/04/15 05:04 PM
1

Eh, I wouldn't exactly choose heels if I was going to walk an uninterrupted joyless mile in them. Or if I had to waitress in them... or was made to wear them under any other circumstances. They should be fun - and optional. But that's an argument against sexist dress codes (where they exist) more than gender violence, isn't it? Am I overthinking this, taking it it too literally? The shoes are likely just symbolic. I suppose it's meant to teach men what it's like to feel vulnerable. Obviously you…
/r/MensRights12/04/15 02:56 PM
16

I guess the heels are just symbolic... an exercise in feeling vulnerable in a fairly specifically female way. Whether it's a great idea to do it that way is another question.
/r/MensRights12/04/15 02:53 PM
7

Probably the claim that more men than women are victims of crime.
/r/MensRights13/03/15 05:44 PM
5

This whole idea of treating individuals primarily as representatives of some monolithic and homogenous birth-accident demographic in which all members are 'privileged' or 'oppressed' or 'powerful' and all non-members are the opposite really fucking grates against my sensibilities. Maybe because I'm trans and used to not quite fitting in here or there. But probably not only. I get it that it assorted politicians and policy-makers can't always look at everyone individually and, say, police may hav…
/r/MensRights06/02/15 11:46 AM
3

Is it impossible to consider circumstances like mental health, suicidality, self-harm or abuse history regardless of the offender's gender?
/r/MensRights30/01/15 06:03 AM
1

Well... some trans people are visibly trans or at least visibly different and will draw unwanted attention whichever bathroom they choose. The weaponized stereotype of the pervy, creepy, cross-dressing male predator doesn't help (who wants to be seen as that?). And then there's some people's contempt for what they will interpret as effeminate homosexuality. And even if you blend in perfectly well, co-workers or fellow students might still report the 'transgression'. Et cetera... so many stupid w…
/r/MensRights27/01/15 01:33 PM
2

I think the proper analogous term to "feminism" would have to be "masculism", not "masculinism". "Masculinism" would be like "femininism". Unlike "masculine", "feminine" happens to have two "in" in a row. And "meninism"... now that's just nonsense :p
/r/MensRights30/12/14 01:50 AM
4

Well, I'm just trying to help you understand (although, again, I can't speak for everyone)
/r/MensRights20/09/14 05:59 PM
5

I can only really speak for myself here, but the last thing I can voluntarily attempt to become, or to be without resisting, is what I least want to be. I could call it self-acceptance, but in the end it'd still be resigning myself to being what I loathe. I've tried (and not by becoming all manly and shit; I know better than to think that's a requirement). I think most trans people have tried. Some go down some f'd up roads in their attempts to live with what they've been given.
/r/MensRights20/09/14 05:46 PM
8

Thanks for your answers! Don't worry about not answering enough; I know I wrote a lot and am hardly the only respondent. However - I am trying to be as objective as I can be. I can state, pretty plainly, that there are a lot of benefits to being a woman that I just don't have now. Yeah... we're transitioning in opposite directions but both have a sense of men being treated worse, at least in some ways as far as I am concerned. I might be more ambivalent about it thanks in part to female friends'…
/r/MensRights20/09/14 04:36 PM
15

(Edit: Most of this probably makes only half as much sense if I don't state in advance that I'm MTF. So: MTF here) This is something I basically only know "from online", though it wouldn't surprise me if it was fairly common in real life. Have you got any flak specifically for being a trans man who's insufficiently convinced of male privilege? Do you think you live in a particularly macho area? I'm interested in how much of your experience of strictly enforced/demanded masculinity comes down to …
/r/MensRights20/09/14 03:25 PM
1

I'm sure confidence is a part of it, but sometimes your face or body just don't cooperate with what your confidence would project. I almost think I pass only because I hide behind the furniture (speaking figuratively... mostly). Not that that doesn't also draw attention... In the end, though, it's about an intense discomfort with all of the "gendery" aspects of my appearance... not about passing per se. It's just that passing would be a natural side-effect of the desired solution ;)
/r/MensRights11/09/14 03:00 PM
1

I wasn't actively trying to appear more typically masculine than I was, there just wasn't much I thought I could do about the issue. And my interest were essentially escapist, artistic and nerdy; nothing macho, nothing girly either. I had a hapless escape attempt in goth culture, an excuse to (cautiously) appear more feminine, but in the end I couldn't "medicate" my gender issues via some sort of (cautiously...) transgressive performance. My body was increasingly betraying me. I outright denied …
/r/MensRights11/09/14 04:20 AM
1

If I could've stopped the guy-act at any moment and basically just washed the 'wrong' anatomy, face & voice out of my hair along with people's 'wrong' perceptions of me... I probably wouldn't have been that miserable about the way I was born. Just saying it must have been more of an experiment to her, not some sort of curse. Even if it did feel wrong.
/r/MensRights09/09/14 11:11 PM
1

Could be... although she could've "transitioned" within a few heartbeats whereas actual trans people are comparatively stuck (or looking at tedious, costly and often imperfect legal, medical and cosmetic procedures). It might have felt like chickening out, of course, so she bit the bullet and soldiered on. (Like a man. Ha.) It seemed to come to a climax when she was alone among angry, troubled men on that retreat thingie and asked one of them to ceremonially cut her... there must have been a lot…
/r/MensRights09/09/14 07:35 PM
1

Read the actual book a little while ago after somebody (from here, I think) recommended it to me. She visits a number of very male-centric environs and "cliques" that were foreign to me as well. Strip clubs, a monastery, some sort of mythic-therapeutic men's retreat, the dating scene... in the process she definitely gains greater sympathy for men than she had started out with, but I wonder how representative those guys were, and if she didn't just exchange a somewhat hostile cliché for a more be…
/r/MensRights09/09/14 01:50 PM
3

I guess that really is how the word is typically used and understood. But then they probably don't have "typically a man" in their definitions for electrician, astronaut, plumber, genius, etc.
/r/MensRights06/09/14 03:36 PM
3

Hasn't it been suspended rather than abolished? It's still part of the constitutional law (Grundgestz), at any rate. I imagine they could reinstate military and civilian service as the same male-exclusive obligation it's always been. Still, lucky everyone who would have been affected by it.
/r/MensRights08/08/14 01:45 PM
3

When/where I grew up, military service was mandatory for men aged 18+. Conscripts weren't sent into combat, but they did have to do their time in the army. Or else. I remember hearing that this wasn't unfair to men "because women had babies instead"... as if the state sent them to baby-having barracks against their will and punished them if they refused! The "men are stronger" argument doesn't really make sense to me either. Conscientuous objectors otherwise fit for military duty still had to se…
/r/MensRights05/08/14 04:15 PM
5

It might be an inborn neurological intersex condition in some cases and more psychological in others (or a combination thereof). All I can tell you is it doesn't go away, hurts like fuck, doesn't respond well to reparative therapy, and isn't by choice. (I'm considerably more reserved when it comes to making statements about what it means with regard to the nature of gender.) Transsexualism is listed in the DSM as well as the ICD under various terms like transsexualism, gender identity disorder a…
/r/MensRights03/08/14 03:40 PM
3

That whole part was confusing, and I didn't get the impression she knows very much about transsexualism. Her main quibble seemed to be with people identifying as genders other than male and female. Some trans people do identify as neither male or female, many just want to be acknowledged as "just another man/woman" (albeit one with a birth defect and uncommon history). She then went on to explain trans people as intersexed, with "messed up" hormones or chromosomes, or "hidden" ovaries or testes.…
/r/MensRights03/08/14 03:34 PM
2

I'm more or less invisible, it seems. I've never experienced cat-calling outside of movies. There seems to be a cultural difference there. To me cat-calling just doesn't bring to mind people who'll respect your dignity or boundaries. I'd probably try -- but fail -- to interpret it as a frank, genuine and non-ironic compliment. But even positive attention can be intimidating if you don't know how to read it or what else to expect. "You're gorgeous!" is verbal and fairly unambiguous; a wolf-whistl…
/r/MensRights02/08/14 03:15 PM
2

"Dear well-meaning SWMs: you're not the Borg. Speak of what you, personally, have done, of what you may have been spared, of what you may have failed to acknowledge or take seriously because it's simply never affected you. And maybe, just maybe, consider that you haven't prenatally soaked up some great collective guilt through your penis. I'm sorry you seem to feel ashamed of traits you didn't choose." That's what I'd like to tell them. But I'm not that far below them on that purported orientati…
/r/MensRights31/07/14 09:22 AM
2

Well, yes, women are usually considered non-player characters in this sort of violence, and it's usually perpetrated by men. But when man A gets killed by some man X he's never met in some conflict he hasn't started, their biological similarities don't make him complicit in his own murder. It doesn't mean he's a more ignorable victim, just that sexism isn't a one way street.
/r/MensRights17/06/14 12:49 PM
3

That's risperidone, a neuroleptic. /useless information
/r/MensRights28/05/14 11:48 AM
7

I'm not an MRA, but I'm sympathetic enough to men's issues to read around here and elsewhere. And I've never heard MRAs talk like that. If anything, they want to change the traditionalist role-playing game instead of turning it up to 11. 12. Granted, I'm selective about where I hang out.
/r/MensRights25/05/14 10:57 AM
7

Hm, maybe. At least she didn't make fun of them.
/r/MensRights17/02/14 01:55 PM
4

I'm not sure why you think she shamed them. Surely they agreed to be interviewed and followed around? It seems she mostly just let them talk. (Of course there could always be some heavy, mean-spirited editing involved but I can't tell from watching the documentary.)
/r/MensRights17/02/14 01:47 PM
3

I was certainly attracted to Lego, video games, computers in general, science fiction and fantasy. But those aren't uncommon among my female friends either. I don't know if I really had any tell-tale "trans signs" as a child. I mean, I cried a lot and wasn't very big and strong, but that doesn't exactly make you a girl. It can make you uncomfortable with stereotypical masculinity, of course. But the real gender dysphoria only kicked in when my body started 'mutating' at puberty and everything ab…
/r/MensRights10/02/14 07:29 AM
5

I did come across as gay or effeminate for a while as well as any number of other things people chose to project onto me from manly to feminine and back. It just never really made sense to me and apparently I wasn't fully 'gender trained' one way or another. I've never used a urinal in my life, always crossed my legs a lot and would have felt ridiculous at any time affecting a macho swagger but for a long time it didn't occur to me to think about that in terms of gender. It may have had more to …
/r/MensRights10/02/14 04:26 AM
2

"Self Made Man" I've read a lot about it... I have to say I've never been in "man" situations like the ones she describes. Maybe I should read the book.
/r/MensRights10/02/14 03:32 AM
3

That's right. I can't really talk about most aspects of socio-politico-economic discrimination from a "trans" standpoint because I just don't have the required first-hand experience. Oh, I can look at statistics and see that men get harsher sentences for the same crimes, fewer homeless shelters, less medical research funding, that men actually suffer more violence in public than women, etc., and I can notice the general public's disinterest therein or ignorance thereof and be upset by it, but I …
/r/MensRights10/02/14 03:17 AM
1

Sure, some people might take a perfectly earnest compliment the wrong way. But on the whole I think people should be able to show approval (or to just approve quietly to themselves) with some sensitivity as to what might in fact come across as intimidating in a given situation. And while that is certainly subjective, so was the "I need feminism" sign she held up. It really only addressed her own feelings. I could be wrong, but to me it basically just said, "I shouldn't secretly crave approval mo…
/r/MensRights10/02/14 02:36 AM
7

Welllll... doesn't she have a point insofar as it's not healthy, in the long run, to value external approval over not being harassed? Although I don't think you need to be a feminist to see it that way, nor that it's an experience only women have.
/r/MensRights09/02/14 10:39 PM
19

Interesting read. I've transitioned in the other direction; I'm not sure I've really seen the world "from both sides" (or any side other than my own), but I've likewise developed greater awareness of men's issues in the process, as well as greater skepticism regarding gender-related -isms and ideologies (including the ones that are ostensibly on my side)
/r/MensRights09/02/14 10:24 PM
4

Being considered part of the over-abundant horny rabble probably doesn't feel so great either...
/r/MensRights16/12/13 03:20 PM
5

Either men are deemed overrepresented and need to have their numbers kept down or women are part of the product being sold. Or both. Not sure why anyone would be comfortable with that arrangement. (Though I guess I'd still accept a free drink if I got one)
/r/MensRights16/12/13 11:38 AM
-3

Indeed. I have nothing against sexy video game characters, in principle, but if you want to see objectified men, don't turn to He-Man. Turn to marching armies.
/r/MensRights30/11/13 05:40 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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