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SnooChipmunks8506 Archive

View 3 posts and 262 comments by SnooChipmunks8506 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Lols. That doesn’t work here. It’s there for everyone to read it. Nice response though. You give the vibe of a boy hiding under his blanket while trying to talk tough.
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/26 04:41 PM
1

I just repeated what you said, back to you. So… that’s on you, bro
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/26 03:20 AM
3

Not jumping on your back for asking alternative questions, I am pointing out your dismissive and disrespectful attitude. Why are you acting this way? Sacred?
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/26 12:20 PM
4

Who cares why? It is his choice on what he does, why insult him for not wanting an optional surgery?
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/26 12:08 PM
5

Same happened to me too. I did it and that same day my (ex) wife started mocking me about being a “little bitch,”I regretted getting it, but I regretted giving her that control of my life even more. I had it reversed after my divorce and for whatever it is, feel a ton better about it.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/26 12:07 PM
3

Don’t worry, that’s going to happen. They will get married and her mask will fall off, then he will start to realize all the lies about her being the victim.
/r/Divorce_Men13/05/26 11:03 AM
3

On top of that he now knows of the debt and if he doesn’t act quickly, will be liable to help pay it off.
/r/Divorce_Men07/05/26 01:29 AM
5

This is my HC divorce except for #7.
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/26 11:25 AM
2

No need to worry, you’re welcome here. We’ve all come here to get help in one way or another. Sorry about everything going on. It’s hard to face the accusations when you know that they’re lies. I remember feeling so lost when it happened with me. The best solution isn’t defending yourself, it’s documenting everything and letting the lawyers fight about the splitting of assets. The accusations don’t hurt me 8 years later, but they are still being thrown around.
/r/Divorce_Men29/03/26 07:01 PM
1

Update! One month.
/r/Divorce_Men29/03/26 06:56 PM
1

That is a certain type of evil.
/r/Divorce_Men19/03/26 01:59 AM
31

I am the same. Women get treated amazing even when there is evidence of them being absolute monsters. What broke me was hearing all of the excuses as to why it was ok for her to cheat on me and abuse the kids. It came from her family, my family, the family pastor, even to one point the school counselor for my oldest told me that no one should ever judge a mother by their actions. Only one parental therapist told her that she was wrong and that her manipulation was destroying the children’s menta…
/r/Divorce_Men18/03/26 10:15 AM
3

You can’t ever MAKE someone happy. Something about horses and water. I have the same issue, my ex was mad that I remarried 5 years after the divorce (and her cheating on me) because it “disrespected her choice” to keep my last name. She shrouded it around the “stability for the kids.” 10 years after the divorce, she changes her name back to her maiden name and then tells the kids she did it because she wanted to symbolize the removal of oppression from her life. I never said anything about it. W…
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/26 12:06 AM
5

It is the herd mentality. If one does it and all the others see it, they will all do it. Long term consequences don’t matter to the herd because the actions are emotional and feelings based.
/r/Divorce_Men05/03/26 12:51 AM
9

This kills me. I am sorry you went through all of this because she prioritized “happy mom” above the needs and concerns of everyone else. Hard work and struggle brings long term happiness, but if that struggle and work is framed as wrong and evil, then it doesn’t truly provide the same satisfaction. In a sense, she robbed her children of their innocence, and stole both of your golden years of happiness and companionship. I wonder if your ex has hit the stage where she realizes that she will be a…
/r/Divorce_Men05/03/26 12:01 AM
5

This advice isn’t petty revenge. She has been lying to you for a very long time. She is going to try to take as much from you as possible. She will try to tear everything apart. You need to be the protector of your home.
/r/Divorce_Men01/03/26 04:22 PM
1

I am doing well. It was rough in the beginning until I realized that everything she was doing was absolutely intentional. After that, her tactics got really easy to spot.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/26 01:33 PM
1

I don’t know about yours but mine cheated on me for years. I started filing for divorce and moved out of the house. That is when she stated doing all of the horrible things, hack my email, trackers on my car, death threats, lying, breaking and entering, and all the emotional damage that goes with it. At one point she was asking my oldest what she thought would make me want to kill myself. 9 years later and the only thing that has changed is that she has a long criminal history and that the polic…
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/26 02:14 PM
2

The age old advice of looking at her parents’ relationship should be written on stone. Mine said the exact same thing. Talked about how her mom lied about everything and was the reason her dad killed himself. After I moved out, she did the same things too. At one point she admitted that she was trying to get me to kill myself.
/r/Divorce_Men17/01/26 10:19 PM
2

This is a hard lesson to learn, but a good one to learn quickly. She isn’t concerned about what is the best for the kids, she cares about controlling you and using them to do it. It takes time and you are going to forget some of the stuff she does that is horrible, but critical you keep track so you can make sure the kids are safe and healthy. Document her actions as she continues to do these things.
/r/Divorce_Men12/01/26 11:08 AM
3

The system is crazy. There is no accountability for their horrible behavior but the courts can impute income at will and bankrupt someone who is doing everything right. Going through my divorce changed my political views and beliefs. Both left and right punish fathers and husbands for divorce. One is more subtle about it than the other. I found myself leaning “classic liberal” where the government is restricted and limited to minimal control.
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/26 08:28 PM
7

This is the biggest issue. I paid $3500 in CS and $1500 in alimony for more than 8 years before I could get her back into court and get everything readjusted. During that time she complained that she didn’t have enough money for the kids. She wouldn’t buy them clothes, refused to pay for medical or school fees, wouldn’t feed them the day before I picked them up for the week, and avoided every possible expense she could. All the while she would travel to vacation resorts when the kids were with m…
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/26 02:44 PM
4

Showing that it is truly systemic misandrist oppression. The system favors women and demands that men pay for the relationship even after the dissolution of said relationship.
/r/Divorce_Men03/01/26 02:21 PM
19

It is also funny that the moment someone brings up those statistics they are labeled as Women Haters.
/r/MensRights12/11/25 12:54 PM
5

This is the right answer. OP, fix yourself, eat right, get into the gym, go to therapy, and get some good hobbies. Avoid relationships for the next 18 months and become a better person. Being alone is scary, but it is better than being locked down in another horrible relationship and destroying your future again.
/r/Divorce_Men07/11/25 09:28 PM
1

Wow, that’s a lot of racist, elitist sentiment to unpack here. I don’t have time to do that, but it is illegal to fire anyone based on their sexual orientation… everywhere in the US. The “three big cities…” seriously, you clearly don’t have enough life experience other than reddit. Go touch grass
/r/MensRights05/11/25 04:16 PM
4

Like gay chicken? /s Isn’t that sexual harassment too?
/r/MensRights05/11/25 01:12 AM
29

This is really the answer. If possible, show you and your husband off and ignore anything not work related. Gay dude beats sexual harassment in the HR shuffle game.
/r/MensRights04/11/25 09:30 PM
7

Perimenopause is a huge deal. My wife went from sweet to MONSTER when it started. We found that creatine, hormone therapy, and aerobic exercise helped so much.
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/25 09:25 PM
2

That is my theory too, but she refuses to go to therapy and stops going the moment they start to see through her lies.
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/25 10:07 AM
2

One of my kids is the same way. Of course my ex blames me for why my kids is No Contact, my ex can’t be accountable for anything she did. She told me that it is my job to lie to my kids about her, that way they won’t hate her… I have it in writing from an email she sent me. It is one of the rare times she admits to being horrible to everyone.
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/25 12:30 AM
5

I am the same way with my kids. We don’t discuss money or raises in front of them and I always tell them to be honest. My oldest told me once that she knows how both of us feel about them by what questions we ask when we pick them up from school. I ask them about their day, what they want for dinner, etc. Their mother asks them about me, to repeat back conversations in our home, if they saw money or checks laying around, and specifics on their step brother (which she tried to later use in court)…
/r/Divorce_Men23/10/25 11:38 AM
1

Wow. That is a savage response. Here is the deal, she is having an affair. The physical part hurts (a lot) because you are a physical creature, but the emotional affair is still an affair. I also am skeptical when someone visits the person but lies about it. Sure, just getting a Red Bull is the excuse, but how much do you trust that she isn’t hiding everything just so she can look good to others?
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/25 05:57 PM
1

Definitely shop around for a good attorney. You will want to make sure you do the best thing for your kids. Washington does take affairs into account if she is using marital money in the affair (buying gifts, paying for trips, or hotels, etc), as it relates to child support, alimony, and custody. The fact that she agreed to work on the marriage, but continued the relationship with the other guy also looks bad when it comes to child support, alimony, and custody. A qualified attorney will help yo…
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/25 05:43 PM
2

I am poor because she spends every penny she can get her hands on. We did a prenup because I bought land in 1995. If I am forced to sell, it would be a considerable amount of profit due to the land value.
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/25 05:13 PM
2

At all.
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/25 04:30 PM
3

I love that so much. The soon to be ex husband is like “honey you need to put yourself out there. Have you tried Tinder or Bumble?”
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/25 01:58 PM
9

I am with you here, never again. I hate that the benefits aren’t there and that I will always file as Head of Household, but… I save so much more of myself and the value of my hard work by being a good person to everyone, but never the burden of a husband. I recently discovered that “I am too clean.” My STBX told me that she hates how clean I am. I didn’t realize that washing sheets and bed linens once a week, Thursday night cleaning the house (to prep for the weekend), and daily sweeping the ti…
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/25 01:28 PM
3

He offloaded her to save the $50,000 to $150,000 in alimony over the next 10 - 20 years? That is GAME!
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/25 01:19 PM
11

This is the absolute truth. My second wife was all about “being in it to the end” and working together, until it got hard and she saw that she is accountable for her actions. That’s when it changed. She demanded that I rent her an apartment in the city “to figure things out.” No ma’am, that is not how this works. I knew immediately what was about to happen. The first wife was a professional at lying and hiding her behavior, my second wife doesn’t even have tickets to the game. I have a prenup, v…
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/25 01:18 PM
3

We have to find the humor where we can. Keep going man, you’re doing great.
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/25 07:12 PM
1

Bro! You set her up! I fought tooth and nail to get my masters all while taking care of the children, running the family business, cooking and cleaning. My ex complained often about how long I was in school. It was a 3 year degree that I did in 4. If you ever need a player 2 to help you in life… I have a PhD that I want to finish. I’ll make coffee, compliment the cars, help you plan your awesome new man cave, paint the AWEFUL purple bathroom, do laundry, sell everything of hers and gift wrap the…
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/25 12:15 AM
-2

I appreciate your honesty. I am not naive about the abuse or harassment. I do believe in redemption and working together. This would be a very different situation if she wasn’t try to be a good wife and person. I love her growth and development as she throws off her toxic personality issues and recovers from her childhood traumas. She gives me space to do the same. We are an ugly and loving relationship, it is part of our growth. Setting realistic boundaries and expectations
/r/MensRights19/10/25 12:24 AM
-4

It doesn’t annoy me at all. I posted it so that the one person looking for the truth will stumble across it. You aren’t them. Clearly.
/r/MensRights19/10/25 12:19 AM
3

I expected this response, especially since this is Reddit. Our relationship is more complicated than this and while her attitude towards my weight is fucked up, her attention and love of me after my injuries and surgeries was very caring and kind. We are all flawed, there isn’t a perfect match. I know I’ve said and done things that were thoughtless or not kind. It is part of marriage. She is in therapy and we are in marriage counseling. We are working on our issues and doing our best to be bette…
/r/MensRights18/10/25 11:49 PM
1

My wife is that way. I am over weight, and have been since we met. She tells me that it is ok to be a little overweight but she will divorce me if I go bald. Her and her friends laugh at these comments. I have lost 50 kilos since 2022, but I am still pushing hard to lose more. I hate that I am a joke to her. I would never openly criticize her weight or hair, even though perimenopause has caused her hair to flatten and her tummy to grow.
/r/MensRights18/10/25 11:18 PM
2

You seem to have a lot of the language of a narcissistic personality in just a few sentences here. I would seek therapy. Many people carry narcissistic traits due to a traumatic childhood or having a narcissistic parent (kind of the same as a traumatic childhood). The idea is to a healthier mindset and be a better dad for your kids, not drag out a painful experience as long as you can because you like parts of your day or because you’re paid into a marital asset.
/r/Divorce_Men14/10/25 09:29 AM
18

I was walked out on, she had “multiple affair partners” and we were in a high control religion. She had a lot of time to plan her exit. She “didn’t morn our marriage” she never committed to it fully. That is why she sought comfort and companionship with other people. Just reading OP’s post triggered me. My ex came back years later and said she wanted to start over and see if we are compatible still. I told her no, and wished her the best. I spent a long time in therapy trying to understand mysel…
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/25 06:36 PM
3

This is the best advice I’ve seen on reddit. OP is asking a bunch of money trolls what they would do in his situation. Be prepared to be downvoted
/r/Divorce_Men04/10/25 01:14 AM
2

This is exceptionally true, and I am seeing it in real time, again. My ex-wife cheated on me, but I was the one that the friend group cast out (8 years ago). The group knows the full situation, but I am excluded from the group because the wives have said that my ex needs more emotional support than I do. My current wife struggles with a cluster B personality disorder. This afternoon she told me that she “deserves happiness” even if she has to abandon us (including our 3 year old) and return to h…
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/25 08:53 PM
10

I have 2 spousal support payments left. I have paid hundreds of thousands of dollars since 2017. She is still as miserable to be around as she was when we were married. The good news is I tell her to fuck off and get to watch her meltdown, knowing that there isn’t anything she can do about it. She tried to petition the court for another 8 years of support, even while making $150,000 a year. The judge politely told her the exact same thing.
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/25 04:31 PM
1

Yes, it how it works. She is allowed to change her mind, we all are. Be the best dad possible, kids are smart, they will understand who their mother is, everyone eventually does.
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/25 09:46 PM
5

I understand your frustration but your ex said she never wanted another baby, with you. The fact that you offered to get her pregnant is really disturbing. She doesn’t love you, have enough self respect to admit that her feelings are her business. As a father of 5 children, one of which is from my current marriage, I know that you are worried. It is important for you to understand this next step in your life. Yes your children matter, no her next child is not your business. You can be a supporti…
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/25 09:08 PM
8

This was my first reaction. It’s been 2 years, please stop trying to control your ex-wife’s life. Then it hit me, OP still hopes to restore his lost relationship and expects his ex wife to maintain abstinence until they are together again. OP’s soul is broken and he is responding to the first stages of acceptance of the reality of the divorce. Better late than never I guess.
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/25 07:25 PM
1

All people are that way. Your choice of friends is your quality of character. Of course. I was saying that she doesn’t need to be a virgin at marriage to make horrible comments about size. Horrible personalities aren’t developed after having sex.
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/25 05:18 PM
4

Maybe not call her a name while doing it, but open accountability is imperative to healthy relationships.
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/25 12:02 PM
2

Of course it is, it is human nature to be that way. Selfish people don’t realize that a lot of life’s greatness is because of accountability and responsibility. Our daily habits define us.
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/25 11:58 AM
12

She resented you before the divorce, this is just one more reason why she blames you for her behavior.
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/25 11:56 AM
3

It doesn’t really matter if she’s a virgin. Petty women will use whatever they can to hurt their husbands. If she wants to hurt someone, then saying that “all of her friends laughed when she told them about his size” is just as effective too.
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/25 11:43 AM
3

Like a child throwing a tantrum. This is why accountability matters
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/25 11:40 AM
3

Especially when they are mad. People who love someone else want that person to look good and be successful. The moment they use abuse or triangulation, they are showing how much of a piece of shit they are.
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/25 11:39 AM
3

This is my answer. I regret meeting his wife too. I also regret meeting my ex, but I learned a lot of good lessons about how hard life is and I don’t want to lose that.
/r/Divorce_Men21/05/25 08:22 PM
2

Wow! I have TBI from a few events in the 2003-2004 years. I still can smell, unless I have those crazy migraines from the left side of my face/neck area. I can’t imagine it being like that forever. Brutal. Thanks for the sacrifices brother. As for the wife, petty bitches - being petty bitches. My ex tried to do this and my kids freaked out. At night, as the kids were in bed, she would tell them that I threw them away like trash… even though she was the one who left and refused to let me see them…
/r/Divorce_Men17/05/25 03:38 PM
1

This is actually a form of child abuse. Most counties have parental education about inflicting trauma upon children and the list is almost exactly how you wrote your posts. I would definitely get that clause in the parenting agreement and then push for contempt of court when it is broken. The long term damage to your child is profound. This desensitization of sex and violence is a good way to create a sociopath who hurts others just for fun.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/25 01:58 AM
12

That sucks man. There is a lot of pain in your post (rightfully so) and it’s hard to see those changes and think, “why not put the effort in the marriage? Why wait until everything is ruined?” ALL CHEATERS are selfish assholes. It doesn’t happen on accident, and it is a choice. The choice started when she decided to lie about her interactions with the other person. She chose to break her promises to you and everyone there at the wedding. She chooses to hurt you with the side comments, happy faça…
/r/Divorce_Men28/03/25 09:19 PM
2

This is the definition of sexual harassment. GTFO now
/r/MensRights25/03/25 01:08 PM
3

Don’t be “that guy” who is always comparing the ex to the current. How would you feel if you dated a woman who still loved her ex husband and constantly thought he was better than you? Learning and growing into a better partner is crucial self improvement.
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/25 09:02 PM
52

This mentality is generational. They watched their fathers act this way, praising their mothers for the smallest actions, begging for attention, and then acting as if that is all that matters. All the while their mothers were neglectful, emotionally abusive, and would treat the boys as if they were trash. This would cement the desire to have perfect wife by the time they reached early teen years. The only way this can stop is by calling out the negative behavior as it happens and questioning the…
/r/MensRights20/03/25 10:17 AM
3

I know that after I got through the denial phase, I would have chuckled a bit at the avoidable misfortune. In these situations I would say something cliche (fafo was my favorite for a long time) and then move on. I wouldn’t do that now as it is very clear she is slowly spiraling out of control. Every relationship starts with the “he’s better than all the rest” and end with “he’s a toxic narcissist who abused me.” All of her financial dealings appear to be based on emotions of the time and her co…
/r/Divorce_Men19/03/25 06:55 PM
7

I feel that too. On top of never doing anything right, she treated as if I wasn’t able to tie my own shoes without her. When I disengaged from the insanity, she would accuse me of not being a present father. When I was present and helping, everything I did was exactly wrong. I worked 40 hours a week, I was “never around.” If I had a week of leave she would complain that I should be trying to make more money with my free time. It basically boils down to the fact that she was never happy. It didn’…
/r/Divorce_Men02/03/25 08:06 PM
2

Guy, you’re 100% right. When I win it is only because I lost less than she did. Even in the best situations, there will always be resentment and anger. The good part is that her resentment and anger no longer affects my day to day life. OP is still in the very beginning of the emotional reconstruction process and it makes sense for his feelings of grief and loss. He will walk through fire and find out that he is better off being alone than with someone who isn’t capable of being decent to him. N…
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/25 06:33 PM
2

I am still here because I have to live long enough that my children know the truth about our family. I broke the chain of generational abuse, they have a better future waiting for them. If I am gone, there chances of becoming better go down too.
/r/MensRights19/11/24 11:34 PM
5

People like this create their own misery, they push good people away with this toxic shit, and will never understand that they hold the key to their own happiness. That is why they will always be petty, miserable, and insignificant trolls.
/r/MensRights06/11/24 03:21 PM
3

You don’t want to cheat. Other than the moral issues (and that will make you the bad guy no matter what you do), cheating opens you up for lots of legal issues in NC. Not sure where you are in NC. If it is near Charlotte, I have 3 names that are the top of the game here. My best friend is a former family judge and is one of the best rated family law attorneys according to the Mecklenburg NC Bar Association. He gave me the three options below when I found out that my ex had cheated on me. Arnold …
/r/MensRights02/09/24 06:27 PM
1

It is fucking nasty. I’ve noticed that women will gather in packs and relish in the gossip of the ex-wives. Men usually try to handle everything on their own and will often get crushed by the system. IMO, this is why we have a high suicide rate after divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/24 05:22 PM
5

Exactly correct. What pisses me off the most is that my ex wife lies to everyone saying that I did things, that she was the one who did it. She repeatedly cheated on me, steals money, hurts the kids, and is constantly in financial distress. She plays this game so well that some of my family disowned me because of her lies. Most people choose to believe audacious lies of the ex-wife than to admit to themselves that a mother willingly creates and uses the pain of her children to control the people…
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/24 03:13 AM
2

I love when we see karma's effects in play.
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/23 11:37 AM
1

It wouldn't be validation for me. She would do it in a situation where it is just the two of us (no witnesses) and then deny it if it was ever brought up again. I think the kist satisfying thing would be for her to stop blaming me for everything bad in her life. Just that alone would be the best thing possible. She did in our marriage. She does it now.
/r/Divorce_Men20/07/23 03:16 AM
0

Don’t tell her, but get a lawyer. It is worth the money. It will save you a lot of spousal support as the lawyer can protect you and the kids from her craziness. This is a game women play. No lawyer and they convince you that $1200 alimony for life is ok. Then they take you to court for $2000 child support too. An attorney can help you ensure everything is 50/50.
/r/Divorce_Men26/12/22 10:41 PM
5

This is the way
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/22 08:39 PM
3

A sincere response is better than a reward any time. My second wife is from Indonesia. We talk a lot about spoiled American women who are given everything and then demand more. This post is a great example of this stupidity. Men are conditioned to believe that their family’s happiness is solely their job. While I believe it is the father’s role to encourage new experiences for his children, saying that it is unequivocally his fault if his family isn’t happy is toxic AF. Women (predominantly in w…
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 04:13 PM
4

I had gut issues for more than 10 years. BAD gut issues. Like REALLY BAD, needing surgery and multiple procedures. My intestines ripped and leaked into my abdomen. It almost killed me. I had to beg my ex to take me to the hospital, and if I had been strong enough, I would have crawled to the phone and called 911. 12 months after my separation... I felt great, losing weight, growing hair, and feeling a lot younger. I am 7 years out of that miserable relationship and I feel so much better. Just be…
/r/Divorce_Men01/12/22 07:30 PM
1

Turn her in, Immediately. The longer you wait the more culpability you have in her crime. Turn her in, Immediately. Protect yourself, because no one else will. You can’t be a good father if you allow your child to be neglected, used, and abused. Turn her in, immediately. You have hard evidence that she is willing to break the law for a little bit of cash… She will do HORRIBLE things to you and your 7 year old when she is desperate. 95% of us reading this wishes we were lucky enough to have a stu…
/r/Divorce_Men28/11/22 05:19 PM
1

I am sorry, that hurts to be treated like that. You are the source of the stability and physical success of the relationship and you get treated like you are a nuisance or the pain in the ass. Then seeing her respect and love being given to others? That is brutal.
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/22 02:21 PM
1

My kids got the shit end of the stick too. She is a horrible mom because of the physical abuse and neglect of my kids. She won’t feed them the day before I pick them up, they are always dirty from a week of no showers and nasty clothes that haven’t been washed in a month. I know what you mean, I call it “weaponized incompetence” and my ex would do that all the time. She would paint half a wall, cut wood in the garage and leave it in my parking spot, so I have to either finish it or throw it away…
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/22 02:11 PM
2

Bwahahaha, we might be brothers. My ex claims to be a good Mormon, I throw their temple interview questions at her all the time. Things about honesty in all financial dealings, chastity, treating family correctly, and what not. I do the same thing with alimony too, I once paid in pocket change. Another time it was all in $1 bills. My favorite is transferring the cash to the checking account that the IRS is auditing. We are a pre 2019 tax change judgement, she has to claim alimony on federal taxe…
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/22 02:02 PM
1

I am so sorry to hear that, I know exactly the pain and horrible sense of dread you are feeling. Don’t carry all of this alone. Ask for parent support groups, they are amazing. Stay strong brother. The 4 years are going to speed by. We had 4 suicide threats, 3 long term hospital visits, and 2 over doses in 14 months from 3 of the 4 kids. It is amazing how much a mother can fuck up a kid. The last over dose was with my 15 year old daughter. My daughter told her mother (my ex) that she took 2 bott…
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/22 05:46 AM
1

I appreciate your candor and thank you for pointing out a flaw in my philosophy. You are absolutely right, lack of physical intimacy due to trauma is the outlier of the parabola in my theory. Healthy companionship requires physical and emotional intimacy. I am sorry you thought you could change your wife. I was there with my ex too. I hope that you have found happiness and satisfaction in other healthy ways.
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/22 05:34 AM
3

That is the best part in all of this. She will be the most miserable piece of shit anyone knows, until her last breath. All the happiness and success you have or will have, she will bitterly complain about how you stole it from her. She will lay in bed at night, burning with anger about your actions that she can't control. How she could make you even better but you refused her "compassion." The best part about all of this is, if you hint (or out right tell her) that you are better than her, she …
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/22 04:28 AM
1

Fuck man, fight that to the bitter end. My second oldest over dosed 2 times until I could get the courts to grant me temp emergency custody. My ex told me to not give in to my child's "drama" this is just her trying to get attention. That fucking bitch, I wish she was in jail. Everything would be easier. 🍜
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/22 04:17 AM
6

I feel you 1000% on this. My wife kept demanding more and more money. I went from $22,000 in 1999 to $186,000 in 2009. She complained about me working all the time, then I was home too much, then I didn't take care of the kids, then I spoiled them with too much attention (she seriously said that to me). She complained about every present, live flowers, fake flowers, vacations, retirement accounts, new cars, houses, real estate investments, no credit, too much credit. God that woman was always ba…
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/22 04:13 AM
2

What you just said was more than enough. Thanks!
/r/Divorce_Men23/11/22 01:14 AM
31

You saw behind the curtain, and realized it was her problem, so she had to fix it. People don't realize the "I'm not happy speech" is a HUGE warning sign. When she says that, it isn't her saying that your aren't making her happy, it is her saying that she is incapable of being happy. Most men think it is a problem with them, it isn't. It means that the wife expects you to sacrifice all of your character, time, money, and heart, just to give her moments of excitement. Happiness is something earne…
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/22 10:35 PM
6

After I confronted her on the abuse of my 4 children, she admitted it and then said the common phrase "it is who I am, I can't change." She said that phrase every time I caught her cheating, again when syphoning money from the family savings to a personal single party accounts, when being an asshole to my family, and always when we talked about her general mistreatment of me within our relationship. I had a moment where I realized that she wasn't saying this to hurt me, she was being honest (for…
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/22 10:28 PM
2

Man.... are you lost? This is a forum for men suffering in toxic relationships and going through divorces. There are a lot of other places to talk like that, take it there.
/r/Divorce_Men16/11/22 05:36 PM
7

Absolutely correct. My Ex was the same way. She went once and told me to fuck off after that. She is the perpetual victim, that way she doesn't ever have to change her life... because it isn't her fault. I improved my life by cutting her loose. It was the therapy that helped me see my toxic behavior and how to be a better man and father. I wish she had taken the therapy seriously so that my children wouldn't have a narcissistic bitch as a mother. I am also relieved to be away from her and her st…
/r/Divorce_Men16/11/22 05:31 PM
10

Before you get Attorneys involved and paperwork drafted. Absolutely make time for couples therapy. Go to her with a list of therapists and tell her that you all aren’t living a healthy life. The stress in the relationship is so bad that even the small things are emergencies. Ask her to go TOGETHER to therapy. If she refuses to go, then go by yourself. There is a lot of underlying issues that Redditors aren’t part of. Don’t jump to the nuclear option until it is the logical choice. You make 4x th…
/r/Divorce_Men16/11/22 03:25 PM
14

Learning to be comfortable alone and to take care of yourself and your children is an absolute MUST, for every man. Not just a divorcée. Peace is worth the quiet and lonely times. I got married a second time, 8 years after my divorce. My second wife is great and relatively low drama… LOW drama… but still unnecessary drama. I love my children, I love spending time with them, their unique personalities, and guiding them as they grow. For 5 years after my divorce, I cooked, cleaned, laundered, chau…
/r/Divorce_Men12/11/22 11:18 PM
2

If you want one that cares about your health and family AND has all the connections, I suggest Westmoreland Legal Prices are mid range, but Anna knows all the judges, mediators, and has been practicing for 20 years. She helped me multiple times with my crazy ex, and we took on Arnold & Smith PLLC (Big and Aggressive firm) and she handed them their asses. Kerry Everett is a god among Attorneys. If you can get her, she’ll take care of everything perfectly. Arnold and Smith Law Are expensive, but t…
/r/Divorce_Men28/10/22 11:29 AM
4

I agree with this EXCEPT the compromise point. I know it happened with me, and I have read it a lot here. Most men “compromise” without getting anything in return. They are told to “give in order to get,” but the other side doesn’t reflect the same mentality. Stand strong for you kids, make sure you have a great mediator and attorney, and always remember that negotiations only work with both parties being willing to do what is best.
/r/Divorce_Men25/10/22 10:45 AM
2

My ex-wife used to say that she is the prize and I was ungrateful for her. Apparently she meant door prize.
/r/Divorce_Men23/10/22 12:46 AM
2

Mad respect brother. I misunderstood. Walking away from crazy is hrs thing to do. I completely admire your hard work. Keep going.
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/22 04:17 PM
2

I knew your response was coming, but I am surprised at how well you explained your situation. Yes you are right. I read your 10 year post history before I wrote that response. You clearly went through hell for her, thinking that if you changed enough, she would be able to be the woman you knew she could be. I felt that, deeply. Yes, you clearly went to the very end of the road, you were shattered and broken, then you rebuilt yourself with the best pieces. I kinda wish we lived near each other, i…
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/22 12:29 AM
2

You can see that from those men who already gave up (just read above). Responsibility brings authority. It doesn’t work the other way around. They are standing in front of a fire pit, demanding the warmth of a fire, before they do the work of creating it.
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/22 12:17 AM
1

You have authority over your own life. You can do what is responsible or you can quit and blame everyone else. You have been taught that it is impossible because it is easy to prove. Try it for 30 days, make the physical choice to be responsible for yourself. You’ll see that it is easier than you realized. The incentives are part of universal law.
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/22 12:14 AM
0

Nah, this isn’t right. You gave up and you are covering yourself in the flag of self pity. You don’t have to be responsible for yourself, no one does, but those who practice this everyday will see that they are better off than those that were defeated before they ever tried it.
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/22 12:12 AM
2

Man, I feel where you are coming from because my ex is the same way. But I don’t agree with you. You just said you can’t be responsible for yourself and for your own future because your ex is a POS and gaslights your kids. Children are smart, you keep fighting to be in their lives, you take every chance you have to be with them. Stop talking about your ex to them, stop saying mean things about her. She will prove who she is and the kids will figure it out soon enough. When you act rude, mean, an…
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/22 12:08 AM
2

Yup, the court systems are fucked. What are your actions and choices going forward? Are you going to whine and bitch about something we know is antiquated, or are you going to do what you legally promised and still be the best dad you can? What I am proposing in responsibility is a long game, hard work plan. This isn’t easy and the system isn’t your friend.
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/22 11:25 AM
5

Document, document, document! She is being petty and judges HATE that shit. Demand 50/50 in the custody case and show that the ex is maliciously changing the child's life in order to make it difficult to see her. Discuss the violence and threats with your attorney. Talk about the hostility and dangerous choices she makes. Your attorney will go for what you want. Your ex will freak out if she sees that she isn't going to get your money and will be accountable for her own actions. It is ALWAYS bet…
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/22 11:16 AM
3

You nailed this on the head. I 100% agree with you on the amazing feeling of being treated as a human, friend, lover, and to be wanted. With the little we know about this situation, I don't think a divorce is the answer just yet (for OP). Your situation and mine, yes it was definitely the right choice. Fuck our ex wives for treating us like bank accounts and personal attendants that fix their problems for them, while they sleep with someone else's husband. OP needs therapy and to grow up. His wi…
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/22 10:55 AM
1

I think (in general) we expect that our wives to treat us in the same manner we treat them, but don't hold them accountable if they fuck up. My man, are you demanding the basics of the relationship too? Are you putting her on notice or are you quietly getting drunk in the garage at the end of the day? The solution is to talk to her about this and everything else, and tell her that her actions and words show that you both need help. Then get couples therapy. Get your ass into therapy too. Not one…
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/22 10:38 AM
2

And she is being honest, she did the chores. But if she says she's going to clean and then lays in bed on her phone all day, that makes her a liar. Or my favorite example, she says she loves you but creates situations that cause you emotional and physical pain, only to mock you in public about it. Right?
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/22 02:02 AM
10

Wait!!! My therapist has a great saying every time I throw that cliché around. Yes, yes, but if your actions and words don’t match, you’re a liar. It doesn’t matter if she says one thing and does the other. Either way, she is a liar, treat her as such until both match.
/r/Divorce_Men11/10/22 10:49 PM
3

You and I married the same woman? Daaaamn!!!!
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/22 03:19 AM
3

I am hoping that there is at least one success story. My state can modify, my ex got a master's degree in Data Analytics and is making GREAT money. I am fighting to get her into mediation, she keeps delaying.
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/22 10:19 AM
9

Ha that is what my ex did. She would hear about all the shit the ex wives club got away with and she would try it. I had to constantly fight a massive PR battle, take her to court to get her to pay her 30% of medical bills, and go No Contact with some of MY family members because she lied about everything, including abuse. I never once hit her, I yelled at her one time during the 15 years of marriage because she woke me up by whipping my face with one of my belts (I worked a double shift and had…
/r/Divorce_Men05/09/22 05:55 AM
5

King you have found your crown through adversity. Keep your head high. I lived in my SUV for 3 weeks until a friend agreed I could sleep on his basement floor with his dogs. I still kept everything in the car, but at least it was a step up. 5 years later, I am still fighting my X but my kids see who she is, I have a good place to live, and we are happy. I am breaking the generational line of abuse, and slowly some of my family is now talking to me. If your family is smart, they will see who your…
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/22 02:58 PM
5

This is exactly right. I can only speak from my experience, my X was\is a strong, mean, assertive and nasty woman. She hides a lot of the toxic parts of her personality (who doesn’t do that?) and shows a very confident and in control personality. The moment I called CPS and told her it was over, she went into full propaganda mode. Everything wrong was my fault, everything good was because of her, she got her goofy Mormon friends involved, she told the that kids that I didn’t want them and 1 mont…
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/22 02:52 PM
3

This is the way. I too did it. 5 years later I am still fighting her over everything. Even with court orders, she still doesn’t follow the agreements. Just go all the way, if STBXW is combative, then she will be that way until the end. Don’t waste time or money in mediation.
/r/Divorce_Men30/08/22 11:59 AM
7

This is a mistake not a marriage. Get out now, the longer you wait the more pain this will be. Lawyer up immediately, find a good therapist who can help YOU and YOUR issues. Don’t waste time on therapists that offer feminist services. The more experienced the therapist the better. Now is a good time to rebuild and recover from your mistakes.
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/22 01:05 AM
7

Does it matter?
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/22 06:02 PM
37

Absolutely. Remarriage works best when you have a great lawyer, good therapist, and a lot of time to work through your issues. Divorce is a nightmare and will cause damage to your bank account, mind, and heart. How long have you been married and do you have kids?
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/22 05:56 PM
1

I married a narcissistic bitch who thought that demeaning and belittling was a way to hide her inadequacies. You remind me of her. A fat fucking piece of shit. You’re not even man enough to know how trashy you really are. Clearly your father was smart enough to ditch your ass before you were born.
/r/Divorce_Men24/08/22 01:38 AM
1

Oh? You misunderstood what I wrote, it’s ok, I knew you would. It is easy to see that reading isn’t one of your strengths. Go smoke another joint, you fucking Ghetto Rat.
/r/Divorce_Men24/08/22 01:31 AM
2

Thank God you are divorcing this woman, you are helping her become a better person and have a better life. Nothing worse than watching a good woman get tied to a piece of shit like you.
/r/Divorce_Men24/08/22 01:25 AM
2

If degrading me helps your inner little boy feel better, cool on you bro. I already know that on my worst day of life, I am still better than you.
/r/Divorce_Men24/08/22 01:22 AM
1

What’s her name? Who is your side piece? For you to completely throw away your wife because she doesn’t think you are as good as you see yourself… your getting some sloppy ass on the side.
/r/Divorce_Men24/08/22 12:56 AM
6

This is coming from a divorced father of 4, so I don’t say this lightly. I am raising these children all by myself. Grow the fuck up. You threaten your “ungrateful wife” with a divorce every time you fight? How about the BOTH of you get some therapy and you start communicating like a real man with her. You fucking toxic piece of shit, being a single dad is a 1000 times harder than listening to a wife get mad about not picking up after yourself or folding the towels wrong. Get your immature ass d…
/r/Divorce_Men23/08/22 08:09 PM
1

100% move on. I know my ex kept telling me that I would die without her. When I flourished and had a better life she became more abusive to my kids and started rumors about me being a rapist and pedophile. It appears to me that some ex-wives think that men will die without them, and that is why they are so malicious when we move on.
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/22 12:30 AM
1

Another person we need to clone.
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/22 06:53 PM
4

The debt was a surprise for me. I didn’t know about any of the cards and we fought to make sure they were her responsibility. The judge said she was “unemployable” even though she has a masters in data analytics. I don’t know what we did to get fucked over by that judge, but he hated me. This is a no fault state, so her sucking and fucking everyone at church and the neighborhood didn’t matter. I am still bitter, but working through it.
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/22 06:34 PM
13

How do we clone that judge? Not enough of them in this world that do it right. My first judge ( at the initial separation) admitted that my STBX was abusive to the children, but the children need a mother and that they would stay with her. My attorney was blown away. I was blown away. On top of that, the judge ordered alimony and child support that was 65% of my pretax, that I take all the debt ($75000) and none of the marital home equity ($245,000), and that I get every other weekend with the k…
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/22 05:48 PM
29

You forgot the third option: Celebrate in style. Take your $9,000 that would have been budgeted for October. Invite friends over, have a great evening celebrating the friends and family that supported you all through the years. DO NOT INVITE THE EX. Then enjoy the rest of your life knowing she now has to act like an adult and take care of herself. I learned this in the Marine Corps, when promoted, enlisted men gather and party without any senior leadership. It creates an environment of closeness…
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/22 04:36 PM
46

The best revenge is moving on and being happy. EVERY ex-wife hates knowing that their ex-partner is happy.
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/22 04:19 PM
1

Just working the 12 step program brother. An addiction to toxic women is a life long curse. 😑
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/22 11:15 PM
1

On topic. At first yes, I was worried. I spent time in Asia as a Marine and WOW. We discussed the issue together. She laughed and took it well. The first visit cleared a lot of those questions up by seeing her baby photos, school photos… etc
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/22 11:19 AM
1

Tl;dr: a GOOD therapist is the only way to work it all out. Therapy for you, for her, for you both. Setting personal boundaries and respecting her boundaries. Making written contract for rules of engagement and writing down goals. Make your words and actions match, and expect the exact same from her. I got remarried and this time around I did it right. A lot of men here are talking about money, and that is important, but not the only thing that matters. I married my current wife after 3 years of…
/r/Divorce_Men18/08/22 12:12 PM
14

It is the legal system that is pushing for a “father of every child” to pay. The “it’s yours because you’re married” is lazy law makers ensuring that there is $$$ even in the event of infidelity. OP needs to get OUT before a baby is born, or he is stuck raising a child that was used to feed a sick and mentally ill person’s ego. Good luck OP. You need to move fast. paternal laws
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/22 09:44 PM
-1

This gets posted every 30 days
/r/MensRights12/08/22 10:28 PM
5

Stop letting her control you with fear. If she is going to take you to court, then you are going to court. The fact that she is swinging that threat around like a sword trying to cut you is proof that she isn’t planning on taking you court. After you tell her hell no, she will try to force it by enrolling them anyway. Stay strong and tell her no again and that you are UNABLE to do that. Let her scream and yell and threaten, let her be her. You do what is right for the kids and you; stop worrying…
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/22 11:47 AM
1

You as well man. Being a police officer is crazy difficult
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/22 11:46 PM
3

That advice is rock solid. I feel your depression right now as my situation is a lot like yours, except seizures due to VBIED in 2006. It gets a lot better and life without her has a lot of benefits and beauty. I promise. Get your life to where YOU need it to be. You cannot control another human and it work out well for anyone. Definitely get some therapy. DO NOT trust her in mutual therapy (if she goes) as she will use that against you later. Find a good hobby, teach your kids independence, com…
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/22 09:56 PM
11

The position is clear, albeit a bit verbose. People want to be the victim and twist the facts to make it appear as if they are helpless, instead of owning the situation, identifying the problem, creating a solution and implementing it. Men, women, and children do it. It isn’t a sexist thing, it is a lazy approach to a problem when you blame everyone else for things you can change in your life.
/r/MensRights07/08/22 02:05 AM
3

Amen! I make $110,000 more now than when I was married to my ex. While married a he spent $30,000 in 6 months with Amazon. She also spent an additional $70,000 in credit cards 6 months before the separation. 5 years later I am still paying off her debt because the judge split it 50/50 but gave her the house, paid off cards, and 75% of the retirement fund because “she’s a mother.” The ex takes 35% of my net pay (after taxes and insurance) in child support and alimony each month. Another 25% goes …
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/22 09:58 PM
3

The BRUTAL truth brother. My dad would say that a man deserves an early grave If he didn’t prepare for the future. OP’s wife will drive him to the cemetery, use his money to pay for the coffin and hole, and drop his ass into it alive. Call her bluff, tell her just because she wants to fiddle as Rome burns, doesn’t mean that he does too.
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/22 09:40 PM
6

Upvoted because this guy is a madlad. Nailed it. You can’t build a future until: 1. You both agree to save 15% min of your yearly gross in a savings AND 15% a year in retirement. Or Divorce her, claim her inheritance is part of the family income (contest the prenup) as she used it to buy houses and fund accounts meant to be used for the family. Either way you have to FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT.
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/22 09:33 PM
5

Also, he needs to do the math at how much her inheritance added to the quality of life. While he can’t get it (because of the prenup) it does factor in as income for her. She spends his paycheck and, I am guessing here, the gains from the inheritance as an investment. All of that counts. I bet with the right lawyer and a ton of planning, he will have more $$$ in his account in 12 months than he does right now.
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/22 09:28 PM
2

Well said. The simplicity is profound.
/r/Divorce_Men28/07/22 01:07 AM
3

You have already lost her. Now you are dragging your poor children through this nightmare of a marriage. End it and DO NOT DATE anyone until you have had 24 months of therapy and addressed your codependent tendencies. Brother she is fucking everyone, you are paying the price. Stand up and be the dad you know your children need and get to a healthy place.
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/22 10:24 PM
1

Hey Brother, I feel your pain. My Ex is the same way. We have gone around in circles on how needs and wants are defined. I have taken her to mediation and court over this; my ex is an absolute monster and will hurt the children (physically and emotionally) to get more money from me. Stop having phone calls, make her communicate by email and text. She will admit to being a monster to the children because you wont pay enough.... just give it time, it is coming. In mediation address her willingness…
/r/Divorce_Men14/07/22 05:29 PM
2

STOP TALKING TO HER AND LET THE LAWYERS HANDLE IT. All communication goes between the attorneys, nothing is to be said to your STBXW. Do not trust her on anything she says. Also, the courts don’t want a 20 year history, they care about current paystubs and potential earnings. Do not give her anything. Your attorney will take care of all this stuff. EVERYTHING you hand over to her will be used to damage your credibility and make you look like an unstable, aggressive, asshole. You are hurting your…
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/22 05:39 PM
1

Not at all. Not trying to bust your chops, just that I lived through the nightmare personally in 2018. It is a criminal and civil offense in NC.
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/22 07:09 PM
1

Once again… get a lawyer. All of us are just trolls who are on Reddit. An attorney will tell you everything you need to know. My ex wife contracted the law firm below to sue me for adultery. She would have won if I hadn’t been able to prove her hooking up with 2 of the married men in the neighborhood. https://www.arnoldsmithlaw.com/what-happens-when-i-commit-adultery-in-north-carolina.html
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/22 07:06 PM
1

Imagine being so self unaware that you are describing the situation you created, but blaming someone else for it. How embarrassing, your public schooling is showing.
/r/MensRights11/07/22 07:01 PM
10

It is the same with people who have never shot a gun, driven a car, or sailed the ocean. They don’t understand it and it is socially acceptable to mock people who have/do. It is something amazing that they will never own. It will be loaned to them for pleasure or to give them the children the desperately crave, but they will never really understand what it means to have the equipment that produces the testosterone enough to have stronger leaner muscles, faster reflexes, and the ability to be dri…
/r/MensRights09/07/22 08:40 PM
3

Good luck brother. I hope this turns out the way you are hoping. A good attorney will push you to mediation before court. Make sure to note and document everything, conversations, texts, emails, interactions with your wife and children. EVERYTHING- needs to be noted just in case this goes sideways (I hope it doesn’t) she can get very nasty. Having all your documentation is a good thing, may you never need it. Make sure you don’t date until the divorce is signed and registered in the court. She c…
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/22 03:12 PM
1

You don’t have too claim to be a feminist. Your words speak volumes. Your low syllable count is evidence enough.
/r/MensRights08/07/22 01:11 AM
1

Is that funny to you? You justify your hatred and loathing off of a sexist comment where you make generalized claims about an entire gender? This is why hatred is ignorance, you as a person, are not smart enough to realize that you are doing the exact thing you claim is wrong, but now it is right because you can’t think your way around a linear concept. Thank you for proving us right. Radical feminist don’t care about equality.
/r/MensRights08/07/22 01:08 AM
1

Wow, how great this is?!?!? Radical feminist celebrating and encouraging the tyranny and horrors they swore to stop. This shows that your movement isn’t about equality, it is about having usefully idiots over throwing governments due to incompetence. Giving the world perfect examples why feminism doesn’t work.
/r/MensRights06/07/22 02:26 AM
1

The only thing you got right is that historic life sucked. It sucked for everyone. You are so mentally messed up that you have described an invisible force that has placed men over women for “thousands of years” without a critical thought in your head. The “but” in the phrase is to say that placing someone unqualified in a position because they have ovaries is a way to correct history being horrible? Nah, you and your thought process are just as disgusting as the men and woman who suppressed nat…
/r/MensRights06/07/22 02:22 AM
29

Wow! Why not hire the most qualified person? You are sexist when you put in a requirement for chromosomes. If you really cared about equality you wouldn’t be trolling here, you would be donating your time, money, and all your resources to the programs that help fight tyranny in poverty stricken nations that are murdering anyone accused of being gay, keeping all people in poor health and education. Instead you sit on your fat ass and troll men’s subreddits while shaking your fist in the air at th…
/r/MensRights02/07/22 03:56 PM
19

Imagine, getting a job based off of genetics and not education, experience, or knowledge. Of course it is going bad, you put a person in a position where they know they are good at it. Then you tell them what to do and if they refuse you replace them. May the gods help humanity because we can’t seem to do it ourselves.
/r/MensRights02/07/22 03:49 PM
2

I could have written this exact thing. Ditch the bitch. With a good lawyer, she will be paying you.
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/22 09:51 PM
2

So... because you don't trust religion or politicians you want to take away the right to vote over an issue? That isn't how democracy works. The whole purpose of self government is to have accountability. You taking away a vote to make something permanent because you hate a group of people is just as fascist as what you claim the other side is.
/r/MensRights29/06/22 12:21 AM
1

Edit: moved to comment. Sorry for the confusion. I wrote the above comment on my bus ride home and it didn’t append to the original comment.
/r/MensRights29/06/22 12:15 AM
1

Nah man. I did this on a cell while riding the bus home. It was meant as a comment to a comment.
/r/MensRights29/06/22 12:14 AM
0

Oops
/r/MensRights28/06/22 09:17 PM
6

Yup. Husbands/fathers the person that provides and support while simultaneously being a useless part of the family. My ex constantly said I was a burden. Now she says the samething, but while holding her hand out for cash. Ditch the bitch
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/22 07:43 PM
10

Absolutely this 👆 No contact, right now. She treats you like trash, why are you continuing to let her do that? If she shows up on property, have her arrested for trespassing. This will get exceptionally toxic because you created a monster.
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/22 07:39 PM
2

This kills me. The choice was returned to the states. Your voting has more power for this issue than ever before. Why would people want the federal government to control anything?
/r/MensRights28/06/22 02:26 AM
2

Me too. My oldest turns 18 in 362 days. In total I have 2391 until all of my children (4 of them) are out of her house and on to better things in their lives. I don't like counting days until they leave, but it also gives me perspective on how short this time really is. The pain wont leave until you stop paying the money. Until then, find ways to ease the stress, focus on making that event one where you celebrate it with your children (if you have them on the day). Maybe call them and check up, …
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/22 06:38 PM
2

100% definitely. Maybe join a divorced dad’s group and slowly phase old friends out while you find new quality friends?
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/22 10:13 PM
6

100% FUCKING YES!!!
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/22 02:23 AM
4

Epic response and epic follow up. Reddit has done well today.
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/22 02:14 AM
3

Lawyer up Get everything in writing Gray Rock Responses (yes or no only) Inventory shared and personal assets Plan an exit strategy Prep the house to sell Narcissists and single mothers thrive on causing chaos in your life. They will make false allegations of abuse and do everything they can to hurt you. Narcissistic people also will do everything they can to make you miserable enough to return. The thought of “remember the good times, we can have that again” will be thrown at you when you are a…
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/22 02:14 AM
3

I lived there after coming home from Iraq. Some nights I would lay in bed and listen to the gun fire and try to guess where it was coming from.
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/22 02:27 AM
8

I used to live off of Colfax Ave and Cherry St in Denver in 2003 - 2006. The place was awesome back in the day. Please don’t be a stranger here if you are getting your head wrapped around a crazy idea of marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/22 12:53 AM
1

Good luck brother. Either way you go, I am hoping it works out for you. Being miserable for decades sucks. I know from experience. Good luck man.
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/22 11:03 PM
40

Stay vigilant King. Watch for flags, and enjoy the comfort while it lasts.
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/22 10:57 PM
1

You have waited this long. No one is making her stay either. Having gone through financial ruin… I would wait the 5 years, continue to be a good dad and then protect yourself from her crazy actions when you file. Maybe talk to her about finding a part time job to “fill the gap” of the fear of empty nest syndrome for later on. The hope is that she will make friends and pull her head out of her butt. Either way, y’all need therapy just to get to the finish line. It isn’t ok that she fights with a …
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/22 10:25 PM
12

Hey! Stop! Right now! I have been where you are, all the claims, everything. Police custody, interrogations, criminal lawyers, AND cases being dropped, judges calling her out for lying, and seeing my kids again. I lost friends, business contracts, and family members. I have my kids… fuck everyone else. You will see who is sincere and everyone else can piss off. Everything will get dropped. I am 4 years out from my initial separation. I wish I had stood up more, fought harder. Now that I am on th…
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/22 09:57 PM
3

Kids are smarter than we give them credit. They will see that mom’s stories don’t match reality. Pointing out that she is controlling communication so that they can’t learn the truth helps. I had to do this with my 4 kiddos. Their mother would stand over them on calls and control what they said to me, tell them that everything I said was a lie, and then interrogate them after each visit. By telling them - they can talk about anything you all do and that you want them to love both parents - goes …
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/22 12:55 AM
5

This guy knows exactly the right thing. Be 100% honest ALL THE TIME, but always keep it age sensitive. Don’t talk trash about her, she will do that all by herself. Remember, if you don’t tell them how important they are to you… no one will.
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/22 12:49 AM
1

Hot and cold is a control tactic. She is naturally a cold person and uses hot when she thinks she is losing you. Maybe it is because she feels “safe” with you. If you get her pregnant, she will safely use you as an ATM and you will take care of the child so that she can be back to work. As hard as it is, get out, even if it means leaving the apartment and everything else and starting over. You are better off rebuilding your life than being the guy who is divorced, never sees his kid, and pays fo…
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/22 10:59 AM
7

Solipsism is the view or theory that self is all that can be known to exist. It is commonly found in people who have been isolated for extreme periods of time. This is actually a disorder or mental illness. It is the thought that only their view, mind, and self exist and everything else serves that purpose. In conversations the Solipsistic person will see every opportunity as on to talk or praise themselves. They do not notice or care about the struggles or feelings of others as those are merely…
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/22 02:08 AM
19

My 2nd oldest and I were talking about that very same subject today. My daughter has struggled with depression and tried to kill herself at the beginning of the year via overdose. My ex was there and encouraged my daughter to take more medication (this is why I have emergency custody of her now). She has worked very hard and come so far. In family group therapy we talked about how proud we are of her and her determination to overcome all of her struggles. During group therapy my ex wife would sa…
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/22 01:42 AM
1

A lot of crazy going on there
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/22 08:25 PM
-5

Epic! u/pioneerpersona To the two dicks in a spiraling circle jerk. Hitting in a relationship is horrible abuse. Self defense is not abuse, but physical intimidation is abuse. Fuck, how is it possible that we all get it, except the asshole who keeps saying it is important to slap a misbehaving woman? Seriously?!?!? If you have to use physical violence to control a relationship… then YOU are the problem. It is the idea that he has to CONTROL someone that is so disgusting.
/r/MensRights21/05/22 02:22 PM
3

Another future member being red pilled. Good luck to this guy.
/r/Divorce_Men21/05/22 02:12 PM
3

Yeah, I think he did the misdirection on purpose. Either way, this poor guy is getting hammered by the trolls. I remember those hard days all too well. My ex would “punish” me when I did something that she thought was stupid. Maybe that is what caught my attention to this post. I think the major flaw here is that he is doing too much and it appears one sided. If that is true… it is just a matter of time before he breaks down. I think he said he is getting 4-5 hours of sleep for a long time. The …
/r/Divorce_Men21/05/22 04:01 AM
2

Lawyer up. The courts are quick to throw out Pro Se agreements. If you do it first you can minimize the time she has to fabricate her side. State that the current agreement isn’t working and that you both need to redraft the agreement. Get her to go to mediation and let the mediator and attorneys see how crazy she is… I did the EXACT thing and got back $500 a month in support, 300% more time with my kids, organized tax agreement, her assumption of the financial debt she created, and forced her t…
/r/Divorce_Men20/05/22 08:35 PM
4

This is the best advice I have seen in a long time. Do not “prove” anything to the ex. Evidence is for courts. The ex wife will try everything they can to get you to admit to anything that makes them look right. She has and will continue to make up stories and lies. Also be very careful your Reddit account can’t be traced backward. While there is TONS of support here, there is also a lot that can condemn you, just because you belong to this and other subreddits. Don’t even mention Reddit to chil…
/r/Divorce_Men20/05/22 08:24 PM
3

My ex didn't have to refi until I forced it in court. I called the VA and they refused to enforce the habitation clause. The VA doesn't care who pays for the loan AS LONG AS IT GETS PAID. If it is missed, they come after you for the $$$. Lawyer up and get her to either sell or refi. get that out of your name, you are accountable for all lawsuits, payments, and all other liabilities for the home until the VA guarantees are discharged.
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/22 03:00 PM
2

How dare you think that the laws should apply to everyone! It is just emotional dribble packaged in new age terminology. The same people spewing this filth also say that women are mentally stronger than men and don’t need any special treatment.
/r/Divorce_Men13/05/22 08:21 PM
3

Yeah, small town politics in the South. My neighbor got videos and I called the police a few times. Nothing really happened about it long term, a PO for 30 days and she would stop. Then after it expired, she would do it again. I decided that if she ever broke into my home, I would use a bat to defend myself... it is easier to justify in court. I never got my money back for the tires and I stopped replacing them after the 3rd time. As much as I loved living there, it was good to move. I now live …
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/22 10:51 PM
15

Ha! That is EXACTLY what my ex says. She tells everyone that she wants what was stolen from her... my bank account, my home, my cars, my happiness. At the beginning of the divorce, my X told me that my "soul" will always be hers. She said that she will claim it after my death. A few times throughout the process I thought she would actually kill me... in the beginning of the separation she would park in front of my home at night and shine her lights into my bedroom. I started sleeping in my offic…
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/22 10:01 PM
18

This is clearly manipulative. She went on vacation and demanded that you do soul searching. Then uses the hard work you committed into the relationship since then as a weapon to hurt you during a fight. Lawyer up Start recording every conversation Write things down as they happen Get therapy (just for you) Find a Divorced Mens group that you like Find healthy satisfying hobbies Divorce is a process, there are steps and every divorce is an organized split. Don’t let her inject chaos, she will try…
/r/Divorce_Men10/05/22 01:51 PM
1

100% right.
/r/Divorce_Men08/05/22 03:12 PM
6

Hey man, this is clearly a cry for help. Your praises to the group are you evaluating what needs to be done and then being overwhelmed. Stop doing that shit man… Most of us got our asses handed to us in the worse ways possible. It took us getting our teeth bashed in and wallets ripped off our backsides to turn around and fight. You are looking at the end and telling yourself you can’t do it. You are letting the Great Monster of the Unknown control you. Here is the best thing you can do, go get t…
/r/Divorce_Men06/05/22 08:50 AM
2

Stay on the path Brother!!! It looks like you are well on your way to being healthy and recovering... good luck on the journey and please don't forget to focus on a healthy mind too. (<--- not advise, just an opinion)
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/22 08:39 PM
2

Too late, I realized that after... but I agree with you 100%. We don't share accounts. Property is split as she rents her home and lives in mine (purchased before marriage). My current wife tried to play the games at first, I told her she is welcome to be single and move out. It stopped the games immediately.
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/22 10:57 PM
3

Ikr!?!?! I worked hard to get through school and she fought me every step. I am blessed to have a great job and even though I pucker everytime I send the payments, I know I only have 2805 days of CS and 1191 of Alimony left. Then I get a MASSIVE pay increase.
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/22 10:50 PM
2

Ooof, yeah. I hope you are far down the road from that crap. Life gets so much better. My attorney said that her worst cases involve the wife lying and using the system against the husband. I had detectives show up at my office to investigate allegations she made. Most women know that if they escalate the lies, then men will back down. My attorney did the opposite, my ex got caught lying to the state about $$$$ (the illegal stuff I mentioned).
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/22 10:46 PM
10

Congrats on that. I would have been more hesitant to pull the trigger if my wife was demanding that at the beginning. My ex was much more crafty and was often doing unethical to probably illegal things in order to get more $$$ from everyone around. It was like she was a completely different woman after 2 weeks of marriage. I thought that I would eventually see the characteristics of woman I dated, but nope… She pretended to be someone else until she was sure I wouldn’t annul, then she gaslighted…
/r/Divorce_Men26/04/22 06:58 PM
4

Absolutely agree. It sounds like you were doing a great job. You knew you had issues, you were working on them with therapist both independent and together. You haven’t failed. When God made you, He forgot to put the quit in ya. You are still going and she is working against the marriage. I need friends like you, the guy that doesn’t give up even when it looks hopeless. You are a rock star, and so now it is time to work on protecting your sons and yourself. She doesn’t want to be a family, it is…
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/22 12:12 PM
5

Rule 31 of women being treated better than everyone else, especially in the south. 18 years post divorce, children of the marriage are adults… still got to pay the ex wife for breathing. No accountability from her is needed in this, she can sit at home, do nothing, do drugs, do the neighbor, she can work a better job than the ex husband and still get paid. If women really cared about equality they would stop alimony. Alimony is literally the state saying that the woman is inferior to the man and…
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/22 11:49 AM
6

That sounds amazing! In NC it is generally 1/2 but the judge has the final say. SC is FOREVER, and my buddies and I jokingly call it the "save a bro from a hoe rule" as most women on Alimony refuse to get remarried for fear of losing easy cash.
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/22 06:00 PM
1

Exactly 👆🏼 this
/r/MensRights21/04/22 09:48 PM
2

My cousin agreed to move in (in the beginning). It helped me when planning meals and eating left overs. Learn how to reduce your portions, avoid eating out (wastes your money and your health), eating protein and veggies is a simple process, cut your protein into portions before (1/3 pound hamburger, 6oz steak, beans, pork, etc) and freeze them so you can pull one out and cook with fresh vegetables and SMALL amounts of rice. One of the biggest flexes in a divorce is being healthier (physically an…
/r/Divorce_Men20/04/22 04:52 PM
2

Yeah, I thought that too, especially since I am a Libertarian. I assumed that I was one of the few that was outside of party lines, but chatting with the people here I have learned that we have hard right and left, communists, anarchists, moderates and everyone else. That is what I love about this forum, about you and everyone here. The thought of equality in rights seems so natural that we think everyone agrees politically too. Just that part of this is proof of the truth, everyone can come her…
/r/MensRights20/04/22 04:23 PM
11

Hey u/frosty-gate-8094 Be careful talking politics, I got banned from my city subreddit for 1 week because I pointed out the Trump/Biden hypocrisy. With that said, claiming that MRM is uniquely a leftist issue is gatekeeping a lot of fathers and men here. It is nearsighted to think that one party has control of logical thought just because you agree with it. I think you would be surprised to see that most people her are an equal distribution of political thought around the world. I am not sure y…
/r/MensRights20/04/22 01:57 PM
1

I would 100% agree, that is why I reported it to CPS and we are fighting for custody.
/r/MensRights19/04/22 07:24 PM
2

This is so true. The sane women are able to treat their partner well and work together in creating successful marriages. As we get older, there are less and less of sane women available. This makes sense because they marry while in their prime (just like healthy men do), and stay married throughout their life span. Of course this is a generalization, but most divorcees are broken and damaged to where sane people aren't interested in dating them. I know my wife struggles with my past, I am consta…
/r/MensRights19/04/22 02:17 PM
14

That is my hope. I had a radical at the fist time. They kept asking me questions as to what I "loved" about my ex. I thought the questions were odd so I gave vague answers about cooking or being organized. Later, come to find out, they put in the report that I kept complimenting my ex, so she had to be a good mother. Right now we have emergency custody of 1 out of 4. It is one day at a time for now, fingers crossed and prayers sent to the heavens.
/r/MensRights18/04/22 10:08 PM
12

u/grind289 excellent question and thank you for helping me center on what was important. I was so angry that I wasn't looking in the right direction. The therapist said that her job is to side on the truth. There is clearly a lot of hostility and that she wants to ensure that the children are cared for in the healthiest way. 100% agree with her. I hope that she doesn't fall for the games and everything. My ex tried to have a meeting with the therapist without me so that she could "ensure that th…
/r/MensRights18/04/22 08:56 PM
2

Thanks for the support. I didn’t know where else to go after therapy. My friends have divorce fatigue. They are absolutely tired of hearing about the drama and malfeasance of my ex. So here I am, typing to keep my heart strong. I didn’t expect Reddit to be so awesome and Mens-rights to have so many men going through the same things in one way or another. You all are rock stars
/r/Divorce_Men14/04/22 06:17 PM
1

We are working with an attorney and getting documentation. My second oldest overdosed earlier this month. She said that she wants to give up because she doesn’t want to struggle any more. Because of that, CPS opened a new case. I am grateful my kid didn’t die, according to kid and Ex, my ex sat and dared my kid to do take too many painkillers. Apparently that is the line in NC. Attempted suicide. Still waiting on emergency custody hearing.
/r/Divorce_Men14/04/22 03:14 AM
2

By thread some days. I take it one challenge at a time and ensue that everything is documented.
/r/Divorce_Men14/04/22 03:10 AM
3

I have a lot of the same problems except that when my ex is with the kids she constantly spews hate and filth about me. 4 years later, the kids are still relentlessly being brow beaten. My second oldest admitted (a few days ago) that my ex punishes the kids when they say nice things about me. She takes away food for a day or makes the kids sleep on the floor for a week. It is nuts, and CPS keeps saying that it isn’t abuse. I feel for you, hopes and prayers my brother. Maybe she will pull her hea…
/r/Divorce_Men14/04/22 12:04 AM
1

At first I though this was on the Jokes subR. Feminism just like all “isms” will end when people start asking hard questions about ideology and the conversation is stopped. By demanding blind obedience, you only get the blind that will follow. Anyone else who can see a glimpse of truth, will quickly discard the ideological belief structure.
/r/MensRights13/04/22 06:27 PM
9

I feel for you OP, you need to fight your ex for everything. She has declared war and you are unaware of what is speeding your way. There is no repairing your marriage. SHe is openly mocking you to her boyfriends, and she is going to take everything you have worked for. LAWYER UP. Brother you will feel better in a few months and you will need all your resources to get back into the game of life. Don’t let her continue to abuse you even after the divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/22 06:17 PM
11

Life sucks when you see the “even playing field” in front of you. Welcome to a life of red pill.
/r/MensRights12/04/22 02:07 PM
0

So… this might not be the conventional answer everyone is giving, but I am not going to lose sleep about what she did. I understand the argument about the social inequity of this type of allegation towards men. Hell, even my ex wife did that shit to me at the beginning of the divorce. I had detectives show up at my job and interview me about my ex’s claims. Then another came to my house and got my computers, phones, and all of my security footage “just to make sure” that the allegations were fal…
/r/MensRights09/04/22 07:13 PM
0

The mentality of people thinking they are stupid because they didn't learn sooner is.... well... stupid. Don't beat yourself up about not knowing that your STBX is a whore. It is admirable that you are playing it carefully about the divorce and your feelings about wanting confrontation are normal and understandable. Rely on your attorney and get as much as you can because you will be taking care of your kids. Use the information of the adultery for your negotiating advantage. Once everything is …
/r/Divorce_Men09/04/22 12:51 PM
5

u/Administrative-Dog76 this is an important lesson and it appears that you are relatively younger than some of these graybeards here. Congrats on asking questions and wanting to learn. Curiosity is a sign of high levels of intelligence. Listen to both sides with an attention to facts. Jordan Peterson makes a lot of sense with what he says. A lot of people disagree with him because it “feels good” to hate and destroy others. When a person states facts, find the original source. Make sure the fact…
/r/MensRights09/04/22 01:02 AM
2

Everything that has been said is exactly right. If I could talk to a young SnooChipmunk8506 I would say: It is ok to be alone. Your girlfriend is beautiful and loving but pay attention to the red flags. 1a. Avoid alcohol and stupid shit, nothing good comes from that. Do not let panic control your life. When you panic, you freeze. Doing nothing is worse than doing the wrong thing. Become the gray rock when dealing with your STBX wife. She uses your emotions to spread lies and toxicity everywhere.…
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/22 08:17 PM
3

Ah... a libertarian at heart I see. I am 100% about max rights and the consequences that follow. Seriously though, I know if anything happened to my ex... they would arrest me just because and interrogate me until knew I didn't do if. Why make threats like that? What if her husband and kids really did get hurt... they would use that as evidence in a heart beat. Note: I am assuming sarcasm or autism forced you to make that comment.
/r/MensRights08/04/22 08:09 PM
20

I got banned offmychest too. A woman posted how she wants to burn her house down with the husband and kids inside. I made the comment that she should see a therapist. They banned me for hate speech. Edit: cause I can't spell
/r/MensRights08/04/22 01:55 PM
2

Yeah, it is crazy until it happens to you
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/22 05:52 PM
3

I like the 24 month limit, and I think that this is an interesting idea, but I don’t think I agree, only because of personal experiences. My ex has a Master’s Degree in Data Analysis and refused to report her income for 4 years so she could “make me pay for stealing her future.” I spend 80% of my salary a monthly in Child Support and Alimony combined. I have worked 2 jobs for 16/20 years to get to a point of high middle class and I pay 80% of my take home pay to someone who is very smart and ski…
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/22 01:37 AM
8

As far as I am concerned, you have a badge of honor for being banned by pointing out the truth
/r/Divorce_Men07/04/22 01:28 AM
1

Freaking awesome! Well said
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/22 11:53 PM
3

Wow, the hypocrisy you spew. You aren’t helping prove your ideas, you are re-enforcing the idea that feminism cannot coexist with equality. Your responses here are more useful for the MRM than any of ours could ever be. Thanks for the help comrade. You are making true believers one man at a time. Edit: grammar.
/r/MensRights03/04/22 02:29 AM
2

I agree in that the feminist subs are generally hostile towards men. I think it is good to have her and other women like her on this sub. I love seeing people embracing the values of equality, no matter their gender. Allowing everyone on this sub re-enforces our message that the MRM movement is based in truth. When we start suppressing counter points of views, we become just as vile and corrupt as the other side. People are smart enough to see through the manipulation.
/r/MensRights03/04/22 02:24 AM
2

Not at all. It is easy to see through your half applied "sincerity." I love knowing that this conversation means nothing to me; but you will dwell on it for days.
/r/MensRights02/04/22 03:58 PM
1

Thanks, if that makes you feel better about this.
/r/MensRights02/04/22 03:38 PM
1

You feel that I am purposely misunderstanding? So now you have ended the conversation. You have implied what I think... now you are offended. Life must be unnecessarily hard for you I understandyou just fine, but I don't agree with you. What you have done is ended a conversation on something that you are unable to explain. It doesn't matter if you like my response (especially to me,) and I wish you the best of luck in high-roading, belittling, and the obscufication that you are using to push you…
/r/MensRights02/04/22 03:24 PM
4

What you are doing is silly. If you don’t like it, move on. You don’t like the answers given here so you jump in and say everyone is generalizing towards women, that you expected better from a group of men on a subreddit. MRA is a sub about men who are tired of being treated by different standards. We talk about the hypocrisy and hostility of society, including the feminist movement and governments. As you have said, you are a Bi-woman, your life experience is very different than those of this s…
/r/MensRights02/04/22 11:18 AM
2

Generalizing is easier than giving names, dates, and addresses of events and people involved. While there might be some “generalizing” in this sub, if you read through it more you will see real life experiences and situations being presented in each discussion.
/r/MensRights02/04/22 10:53 AM
1

Wishing you all the luck in the world on this one. Definitely keep us updated.
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/22 01:54 AM
3

Exactly. It is sick and I am not wishing away my children. I am wishing away the interactions with their POS mother
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/22 01:53 AM
2

I really hope that is her plan too...
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/22 05:01 PM
8

I hope you are right. My concern is that you are overly optimistic in thinking the courts will have an equal chance for you and her.
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/22 03:48 PM
2

Hey man, I know shit is hard, especially right now. I have been where you are, most of us have. My situation was a house, she refinanced it and then didn’t tell me about the refi, then her attorney demanded that I continue to pay the mortgage because I paid for 3 months after the refi. All of this happened after I finally was able to get a place and stop living in my truck. You will need to go to court and explain to the judge that she no longer owns the car. If you paid “extra” after the day sh…
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/22 02:36 PM
2

Great questions. I have multiple children and I am not moving out of state because I lose my 50/50 custody of my children. We are both locked into the same general area until my youngest turns 18 (2826 days left).
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/22 02:27 PM
7

OMG dude!!!! Lawyer up RIGHT NOW! She can prove that you have provided a lifestyle for her for 17 years. Put pressure on her, get her to start paying shit and require her to be an adult. Fuck man! Shit isn’t as good as you think. She can take you for everything if you keep going like this… and she will. She will claim that it is because of her that you are successful. She will state that she took care of you. Edit: grammar and timeline
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/22 01:45 PM
3

Definitely need a lawyer. You also need to stop paying her money and directly pay the company… but that is too late. Beg or borrow the money for an attorney. Get a quick job with DoorDash, Uber and Sell plasma. Sell your TV, recliner, gaming computer, hunting rifles, golf clubs, fishing poles, kidney, and/or lung. Whatever it takes to lawyer up.
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/22 03:11 AM
11

I have 44 months left for $1200/mo in spousal support, $3k/mo in child support. I pay $350/mo on insurance, 100% in uninsured medical cost, and 50% of agreed extra expenses. My oldest turns 18 in 15 months and then it drops to $2000/mo in CS. On top of that… I found out my ex lied to the judge and is working for a financial company making $120,000/year for the last two years. I am going back to court and I pray to God they charge her with fraud. A good attorney can work with “most” judges to be …
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/22 03:03 AM
5

No one said always, the comment is a generalization of the truth.
/r/MensRights31/03/22 11:37 AM
2

Don’t fall for her baiting. Look at her posts, she is clearly trying to cause problems. She has be asked to present fact and usually can’t, she then claims that this is the problem with binary culture. Don’t waste your time, just down vote her.
/r/MensRights31/03/22 10:32 AM
2

No one expects men to provide everything? Wow!!! Did you think before you wrote that one?!?!? It is called the TRADITIONAL male role. He works until his dying day to provide a “good life” for his family. You have claimed to not be a feminist, but your other posts show you to be clueless in the mildest sense.
/r/MensRights31/03/22 10:27 AM
12

Evidence given on this post and life experiences of the commenters on this subreddit say otherwise.
/r/MensRights31/03/22 10:22 AM
6

Amen! Mine was 15 years, my wife did a lot of the same things, not as violent in front of people though. It has taken me 4 years to get where I am now. I am happy, I have a great group of friends, and a very supporting girlfriend and partner. You can do this, stop being passive, take control of the situation, protect the kids. And put her into the street.
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/22 09:58 AM
7

Absolutely agree with everyone here. She is going to abuse your kindness. You can always give more later, but for now… DO EVERYTHING THROUGH YOUR LAWYER. Don’t call her, don’t text her, don’t communicate with her, you pay an attorney for that. My ex got 100% of the house, 70% of my retirement, $36,000 a year in alimony, and everything she wanted. I was stupid, I didn’t want to fight, so I was late getting an attorney. It has taken me 4 years to get it rolled back to $20k a year, 50/50 split on c…
/r/Divorce_Men30/03/22 05:41 PM
3

Hey man, we all go through that phase. I divorced my wife of 15 years, and moved out because of her BPD and her sick ways of controlling and abusing the family. With 4 kids and massive debt, I thought I would start off mad, but I went through 13 months of crying, sadness, depression, blame and general self loathing. There is no “schedule” and your sadness is normal, she cheated on you, who wouldn’t be sad? Please make sure to visit a good therapist, it is important to realize that this will take…
/r/Divorce_Men28/03/22 06:33 PM
1

I agree! But why say that when there are some people who have great marriages... somewhere... I am sure... has to be...
/r/Divorce_Men28/03/22 01:09 AM
7

Marriage is great… when she is your partner. Marriage sucks when you have to take care of a grown ass child. You dodged the bullet! Stay strong, she is going to come back because she needs your wallet and affection. Like a druggy, she wills suck your D to get what she wants. Learn from this and move on. There are better women out there. Maybe raise your standards and date women who have some more life experience and less debt.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/22 12:35 AM
2

Brother!!! She is projecting her guilt on you. I had a wife the same way. Always a “friend” who needed her time or a good excuse to be gone all night. She is also gaslighting you to make sure you don’t act on what you already know. DOCUMENT, DOCUMENT, DOCUMENT Get a good attorney (it is worth every penny). Get a PI to document the cheating Go to your therapist and start working on getting back to stable health. Talk about this as much as you can with someone qualified. Kick her out of the house,…
/r/Divorce_Men25/03/22 01:55 PM
2

Oh shit! I love this one the best, except for having to lie and pretend.
/r/Divorce_Men23/03/22 10:38 AM
1

This only works if Alimony is court ordered and you can show a significant change in income for her or you. You can retire and then transfer your $$$ by paying off EVERYTHING you owe $$$ on. Then get a low wage job and petition the court.
/r/Divorce_Men23/03/22 10:37 AM
5

How the f*** do I get someone to marry her??? I don’t hate anyone enough to force that on them, but I really want back that $850 a month.
/r/Divorce_Men23/03/22 10:34 AM
2

I completely understand where you are coming from, and I have done the same since I was a child. My mother would say horrible stuff like this to me and my brother (as little boys), in front of my father. She talked about violence to men and glorified when a man in our community was hurt or killed. Her hate for men comes from abuse. I understand that her pain is from pain. My concern is that if we don't stand up and show the evilness of these thought, the world will continue to do it. It is the s…
/r/MensRights21/03/22 04:38 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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