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SpecialInvention Archive

View 4 posts and 51 comments by SpecialInvention on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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0

> and maybe if you had hooked up with one of them, you would have realized they're just human beings and you wouldn't still be idealizing that era of your life. Indeed. I think curiosity is an underrated thing, honestly. I seem to be driven by curiosity a lot sexually. What's it like to this or that with this person? Even if it's disappointing, at least I got to find out. > it sounds like you're kind of bummed out by your current sex life. maybe look at ways to make it more fulfilling? I'm not q…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 06:03 AM
2

> based on what you've written, i doubt this was super literal and just about cooking. Sure, I don't think it was just about cooking either. It is funny to me, because she was, to my perspective, someone who needed a TON of patience and taking care of. It was almost like a responsibility to be in charge of her like you would a child at times. One mutual acquaintance said I had "the patience of a saint" to deal with her. So I feel like if there was an effort imbalance, it was in the direction of …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 05:13 AM
2

Are the communication errors entirely on my end?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 03:51 AM
2

Again, I feel like the disconnect is that I just don't think like that. In my head, our relationship was what it was. It seems to me that you never know exactly where such things will lead, and where they will end. I couldn't have predicted the moment of our breakup. It feels unnatural to try and fit it in this little box of social expectation - "No no no, you're supposed to do this and then do this, that's the way it's done." Says fucking who? Why? To me it feels entirely disconnected from the …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 03:32 AM
-3

Longing and clinging to a moment I wanted with my brother, and being depressed that life has taught me such moments will never come and to not expect them is NOT sociopathic. No human is perfect. It's only a looong way back when I was a teenage boy pining over whats-her-face in the next row over that I would think "Wow, she's perfect. My angel with those eyes. I want to take care of her forever." But that was all based on a fantasy notion of that girl, and those idealized notions about girls you…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 03:11 AM
0

I don't know if you're missing something, except that if we want to talk about it all in economic terms, your scenario prices women right out of my market. I am a BDSM guy. When I started to be a Dom, it didn't take long for me to realize that women were getting the better end of the deal. It got to the point where I was putting in my efforts and concentration to give them an amazing time and maybe a dozen orgasms, and they would either lay there dazed or embrace me with kisses afterward. It eve…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 02:58 AM
1

My desire to never marry is actually cemented in my experience dating her. Not personal to any failing of hers, just a realization that being around a person all the time for the rest of my life is not for me. I don't think I even got a single good night's sleep with another person in the bed with me. I felt like we were in the same place, based on conversations. She had said something to the effect of, "Ugh, I just don't know. I like my life, and kids are expensive, you know?" That felt like pr…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 02:43 AM
2

> Marriage is respectable, casual sex is not. A person aspiring for marriage is fundamentally aspiring for something better... Strongly disagree
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 01:57 AM
-2

I don't think some people understand how powerful and essential sexual contact can me for some people's mental health. Nor do they understand how much it fucks up people to have denied or painful experiences with that. It's NOT a little thing, at least not for some. I think it's nonsense to claim some sense or moral superiority because you personally don't feel like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 01:36 AM
-2

> ep. You're not imagining it. They think they're justified because they buy into an oppressor/oppressed narrative. They think they're "fighting the patriarchy" - or at least that is their excuse. I agree that that is the poison pill, yes. > They tend to be silent, which is a shame because we need them to speak up about it. But they're quiet because they want to avoid drama and those "I'm a misandrist" people are drama magnets. So if you can distance yourself from these types, you'll often find …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 01:34 AM
-4

I mean, I would be happy with a better sense of fairness and balance. I don't remotely need the world to cater to me, I just want it to be similarly fair to me and other people as best can be managed.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 01:29 AM
1

Yeah, that's the classic line. I don't like jumping into that as if its a nice and neat universal truth, even if some tendencies seem to be there.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 01:28 AM
3

I don't think it's about this post. To me, honestly, it often seems like the modern western world almost in it's entirety is set up to sympathize with women and shit on men. There are pockets of resistance to that, but then those are seen as problematic.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 01:26 AM
1

I think different people get attached differently. I'm reminded of how when I was young, I always used to love going to the pet store with my mom and sister to see all the cute kitties and doggies. It made me happy, but made them upset, because they would fall for them but not be able to take them home. Meanwhile I was happy with the dopamine hit from casual contact. I think maybe there's something similar here. I personally think things like "Wow, that was such a fun experience seeing my gf mee…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 01:23 AM
2

I witness and experience a whole lot of such double standards in the world. There's a woman on a social media group with me who bluntly says, "I'm a misandrist" on her profile, who gets lots of 'you go girl!' type approval for her venting about how stupid men are and how much men suck. Can you imagine if I put "I'm a misogynist" on my profile, and did the same behavior? I would get destroyed, and all those same people would shun me.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 01:11 AM
0

What I'm saying is that while I don't intuitively understand that desire to break up, and it seems such a loss to my perspective, I recognize the parallel between what happened with me, and how I felt about it, and how women seem to feel about these situations. There's also a little venting about the double standard, and the hell I was put through about it only to then get involved with someone who did some version of the same damn thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 01:08 AM
-2

My siblings brought to family outings a string of different boyfriends and girlfriends over the years. It was always clear that some were more serious than others. There was never any sense that I got that meeting family equaled you want to marry. I never want to get married, but I do get very excited to have the people in my life that I enjoy being with meet each other, just as I was excited for my gf and family to meet each other. There was not at all any deception meant in it, it was just, "Y…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 01:00 AM
0

Are those still the norms? Doesn't feel like it where I'm from. Fuck buddies and all sorts of other situations are extremely common, and I don't see a lot of really formal dating anymore. People do 'dates', but they're not like they might have been for our parents and grandparents. I think my frustrations with what you call norms are that they were forever making me a square peg trying to fit in a round hole. They made no intuitive sense to me, and had nothing to do with how I ideally wanted thi…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 12:52 AM
2

What's interesting to me is that even discussion sometimes seems to fall short of getting the point across. My GF and I weren't closed people, we discussed a lot, and yet we still wound up in that place. It's almost like you can't stop the different brain processes from assuming different things unless you go to extreme lengths to do so. Like I said I've also heard and read things from women who share the same sentiment I would have had once upon the time: "You say one thing, but yet everything …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 12:33 AM
2

First of all, forget gender, I honestly don't think 70% of the human race is actually capable of being reflective and thoughtful like that, so I'm dubious. Second of all, we're finding our way back around to double standards. Women have just as much responsibility as I do to not bring my hangups into a relationship, be manipulative or controlling, etc., right?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 05:17 PM
1

My perspective is that there's a tradeoff. I think a lot of young men start off my looking at women as a reflection of a Goddess ideal. They see in desirable women a creature that who has the potential to elate or destroy them with her approval or disapproval. Getting to be with her seems like a huge deal, and they want getting with her to be based in some sort of moral order. The idea of someone like that just giving her sexuality away on a whim because 'he was hot'? "What a slut!" It's problem…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 05:13 PM
1

Why would they be unable to say it?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 04:40 PM
1

You have zero clue about how your experience resonates with the female experience. The societal expectation to behave a certain way, ignore one's own feelings (especially sexual feelings) and be expected and rewarded for faking it. Is that still true today? It seems like it's VERY in for be a woman who embraces her sexuality nowadays. Even when I was college age, it seemed like a thing you were supposed to applaud in the name of feminism when a girl expressed being horny or wanting to fuck a hot…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 04:39 PM
3

I'm thinking about the answer to that, and I feel like the answer is I just don't want someone who thinks in that way. At the very least, I'd like to be with someone who is thoughtful and reflective, and might say something like, "I was thinking about how it's an interesting position to put you in when I ask you to tell me if an outfit looks fat on me or not. Ideally, I probably shouldn't need you assure me, but I do get tempted anyway. I dunno, I wonder where that comes from. I know you spent y…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 04:22 PM
1

I appreciate the thought. I think the biggest issues with finding that compassion come from when the hurt is very hetero male in nature. For example, if I told you I once, long ago, I went to my first day of classes in one year in college, and it made me go home and cry in my pillow right after, you might ask why. But the answer is because all the girls had dressed up in their nice outfits on a spring day, bare legs and tight shirts everywhere, and I wanted so damn much to be able to have physic…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 03:14 PM
2

In some sense because people don't a give a shit about men. We're disposable. On top of that, everyone has been convinced we live in an oppressive patriarchy where men have had it too good for too long, and all efforts must be concentrated on women. Elsewhere on social media where I have people I talk to regularly, I dared to try and talk about men's issues that I felt some personal connection to a time or two, and you can't imagine the shit I got for it. You got the sense people felt something …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 02:28 PM
3

You mention therapy. Another thing I observed about our relationship was how much therapy-speak was kind of weaponized in our disagreements. Kind of like as a way to pretend one was being sophisticated and above personal jabs and passive-aggressive comments while still engaging in them. What I really felt was going on in those situations was some version of being punched in the face, and then being told "Oh, now I need you to care about my sore hand, so don't be a horrible human and deny me that…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 01:52 PM
2

As I said to someone else, I used my ex as an example, but it's not all about her. In fact most recently it's been interaction with other women that has gotten me thinking about this.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 01:45 PM
4

I framed it around my ex, because that was a major example, but it's not all about her. I feel like it's a trend with a lot of women I encounter and interact with. Even members of my family. There's a weariness that has come from giving out that 'special treatment' many women seem to think they are entitled to. When it comes to the workforce, there are some examples there to me as well. I'm sure being an Onlyfans model is not all rainbows, but I don't even begin to see that as an income option f…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 01:39 PM
2

I'm aware it's not about literal facts about how she looks. My issue is more about providing effort to allow someone to live in a comfortable world of assurance that I don't ever remotely get to live in myself. Why am I giving those efforts when no one seems remotely interested in giving me the same? Again it just seems like all the effort is supposed to be put into understanding how the woman feels. I don't owe anyone anything. I live in a tough world where you have to be an adult and deal with…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 01:32 PM
2

I read what you said about emotional intelligence, and even baked into that, to my perspective, at least, is a just assumed notion about a feminine way of thinking being more ideal. Being about sensitivity to emotion is not automatically better than being about truth. In fact for a lot of things I think it's worse. And I don't find my relationships with guy friends emotionally lacking - that again seems to be based in some idea that a more feminine approach to thinking and relationships is bette…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 10:51 AM
2

I'm perfectly willing to hear how you think I am oblivious, if that is the implication.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 10:35 AM
0

Hard to build connections with oblivious people.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 10:33 AM
-1

Well then the question becomes how much to compromise, and how much I want to accept being single until I'm 120. I can't think of anyone I've met in my current potential dating pool that wouldn't involve tolerating some headaches.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 10:29 AM
5

I don't think any of that sounds unreasonable. My experience is that there was just a certain obliviousness there, which caused imbalance. Even to the reality of how my ex and I viewed relationships: My perspective was that no one is ideal, and you take what you can get in this life, because we meet a finite amount of people in our short existences. That's a lesson I feel I learned though the harsh but true realities of life I've been exposed to as an adult. She seemed to think "Oh, a boyfriend!…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 10:25 AM
-3

Well keeping with the double standard bit, I would NEVER ask someone if an outfit made me look fat, expecting a formal entitlement of them to lie to me, or otherwise create some kind of affirmation world around my feelings. I would feel if I expected something like that, I would be out of line. So should I not also feel it is out of line for someone to expect it of me? If the answer is no, then already I'm creating some kind of female exception to my own behavioral standards. And this is the pro…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 10:10 AM
-1

It's a question how much hiding someone from the truth is actually helping them. Like imagine your SO started having a substance abuse problem. Do you say 'oh it's fine', or do you have an intervention that will upset them, but that is for their own good? That's a question I asked with my ex-gf a lot. I didn't think it was authentically helping her and caring about her to never put her out of her comfort zone.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 09:59 AM
1

Oh, she called me out plenty, and it wasn't always fun. But I tend to believe adult humans are supposed to face what IS, and if someone is telling you a truth you don't want to hear, it's not on them for speaking it. So if I thought she called me out for something that was deserved, my belief is that I should suck it up and tell her she was right. If not deserved, I should explain why I think it wasn't fair. And ideally, I would have liked to do the same back, but I constantly felt like my job a…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 09:55 AM
1

Confidence is tricky, because it's very hard to fake. Attempts to show it from a place other than a very deep core of certainty can come off as overcompensating. There's a quiet confidence that comes from just knowing something is true, often through experience, and it's tough because you can't just give that to someone. And the whole idea of 'be confident' doesn't quite work, because it assumes you can just properly generate that from nowhere.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/26 06:08 AM
–

What you're saying is something I think I see reflected in women's attitudes all the time, and I think belief in that narrative is part of the problem. I think it's utter nonsense to suggest society is properly characterized as a patriarchy, or that women clearly have it much worse than men. I think we have a lot of propaganda that makes us almost treat notions like that as obligatory, but I think those ideas are wildly wrong and damaging, and have contributed to getting us into the dilemma we a…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/10/25 08:00 AM
1

Nothing as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/09/25 12:34 AM
1

This kind of conversation is one I haven't had in a while, and it's making me realize there's a way of thinking about this that doesn't 100% compute to me. I spend a lot of my free time interacting with people in the local kink and swinger scenes nowadays, and this is some version of a conversation I've never had with anyone there. I want to say that there's a kind of understanding about sexuality that is present there. I might see some woman from that scene on a discord saying "I feel so fuckin…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 05:15 AM
2

I completely agree with the two way street. The hurdle I run into from my perspective is that that never seems enough for some. I mean, again to my perspective, it seems like women receive about 20 times the sympathy in society these days that men get, so it feels like the two way street is lacking more in the male direction. On social media sites I frequent, you'll see 1000 comments in support of women, and rarely a single one for men. And women seem to get cheered for every little "you go girl…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 02:26 AM
3

I dunno about one aspect of this. My father was not REMOTELY some kind of 'hide your feelings you sissy boy' kind of guy. He was very emotional and lovey-dovey. I think there are aspects to masculinity that get ascribed to nurture that might be more nature, and have more biological aspects to them. In contrast to what I hear people say, what I desire very often is the freedom to be more guy-ish; to say "fuck this lame-ass wimpy shit" and tell crude jokes and just show my testosterone more. I fee…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 02:00 AM
0

There's this almost instinctual thing I sometimes observe where there are 'good men' and 'bad men', and behaviors that get attached to each. A big part of what I wish there was more understanding about is they can be the same guy. So many of the qualities that were lauded and I think desired of me at times did indeed come about in my life, but they didn't come about because I received a lecture on being a better person. They came about because I went from being in a despairing, sexually starving…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/09/25 01:56 AM
1

I think there's a mistaken idea of getting physical intimacy as this kind of added bonus in life or something like that. Looking back at my life it's clear I went through hell and it was only made worse by this kind of attitude, which meant I always felt like I could never really share myself with a woman and have her understand. Sure, the volume goes down when things get better, but when it was in a bad place, it was not something to dismiss like that. I don't have any interest in being a 'play…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/09/25 05:34 PM
2

I wouldn't be too sure of that. There a lot of support in theory but most women irl don't feel and act like they do.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/22 04:31 AM
2

How dare I make sense and offer solutions.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/22 04:16 AM
1

I replied a copy of it to someone else. I've never tried going on 2x. Long ago I got banned from rAskWomen.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/22 04:14 AM
4

Probably hasn't been approved yet. Here's a copy: I don't generally comment here, but this seems like a question I can contribute to. I'm a guy who's been in a lot of different mindsets regarding women, some not great, and obviously I'm not an analogue for every man, but I think my experiences are worth considering. Long story short, I was in a place where I saw negative, hostile, insulting, demeaning, "you'll die alone", rejection-type reactions in every woman I considered approaching in social…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/22 03:12 AM
1

r/TwoXChromosomes had a post entitled "Are men growing more angry towards women?" This was my reply: https://www.reddit.com/r/TwoXChromosomes/comments/uo5a5g/are_men_growing_more_angry_towards_women_am_i/i8ej5a2/ I thought some of you might find it interesting. I just posted so I haven't gotten a shitstorm for it yet, but I assumed that was likely, and even that it might be deleted, so enjoy it while it lasts.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/22 03:07 AM
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