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Specialist-Age9387 Archive

View 0 posts and 297 comments by Specialist-Age9387 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

You mean most women don’t have the luxury of caring about compatibility? If so: That’s sad. I’d rather just have a few FWBs than an incompatible partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 09:38 AM
2

I see what you’re saying and basically agree. So, if you’re causally dating women not chasing validation, who don’t find commitment difficult to get, then you’ll see getting commitment from an incompatible fuck buddy just isn’t something we care about. It makes literally no sense to. Only pick mes or desperate women would try to turn a fuck buddy who isn’t that into you into a husband. I know I can get sex and commitment fairly easily from reasonably attractive men. Neither sex nor commitment is…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 09:20 AM
-1

We are kinda saying the same thing. I just put it more bluntly “the man thinks he can do better and the woman doesn’t.” I would add even if the guy is “hotter” than the woman, the woman wanting more isn’t an issue when she’s secure in herself and isn’t engaging in casual sex to feel like she finally has permission to feel good about herself because maybe she’ll be chosen (which is a stupid fucking reason to be having casual sex since it’s, ya know, casual). I’ve dated men hotter than me as I sai…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 08:58 AM
0

I don’t think the nature of the dynamic inherently favors the dude. When the woman wants more but the man doesn’t it’s usually because the dude is “dating down.” Women are less likely to even casually “date down.” It’s not that men want monogamy or commitment less. The studies I’ve seen show men push for commitment sooner and fall in love faster than women. It’s that it’s more likely the woman actually finds the man attractive enough for a relationship and the man thinks he can do better. Whethe…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 08:22 AM
8

People should know you can’t instantly turn any FWB into a LTR. I’ve purposely only ever been FWB with men I’d never be long term with. They looked good, were polite, and the sex was satisfying, but there was always something about them that made them casual only for me. Major stuff often. Not an ick. But yeah realizing many of us want sex could only help. If you don’t realize that, you’re going to normalize women not wanting sex with you in a relationship. That’s going to make a sexless relatio…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 03:36 AM
2

It matters little because most men are “nice.” Especially at first.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/26 11:29 PM
1

It’s not the biggest thing it’s just a very attractive thing. Is a nice rack the “biggest thing” a man looks for in a girlfriend? No of course not. It’s just very attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/26 07:37 PM
-1

It was the first thing I noticed. It was the first thing that remotely interested me. Most men are nice. That means very little. I don’t have an issue saying that. I’ve always had a high sex drive for my partners for this reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/26 07:35 PM
0

Any man who asks about body count is terrible in bed most likely and more obsessed with dick than vagina. Women shouldn’t lie. They should just never talk to such men again because those men aren’t going to be fun partners in bed or life. That being said I always dated men with game so I’ve never been asked about body count. My current bf mentioned once he’s had sex with around 100 women, mainly in his 20s before he settled into desiring long term relationships. I don’t care and never asked. He …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/26 03:33 PM
0

I mean my ex was 6’4 and every single female friend I introduced him to asked me right after meeting him how tall he is and in a clearly admiring way with a hint of “good for you girl!” A lot of women do care about height. It’s just not the only thing we care about and some rare women aren’t visually attracted to longer limbs on men. Additionally height is just one way to be attractive. Some of the most handsome men I’ve known were average height or below. The face and build and charisma matter …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/26 03:28 PM
2

I DO think of men’s bodies sexually. I like the way some men look because I like the way they look and it makes me want to touch them. Has zero to do with the connection. People are different.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/26 03:24 PM
1

His looks and sexy long hair were what drew me to him. I stay because he’s fun to be around. We always have a good time, the sex is amazing, he’s obsessed with giving me oral sex and doesn’t really care about it in return (though I still enjoy doing that). He has good taste in movies and laughs at my jokes and tells me how funny and interesting I am. He’s a good conversationalist. I also find him funny and interesting. He’s also just kind in a general way to everyone and doesn’t ever say weird b…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/26 03:22 PM
1

I look at Cillian Murphy’s wife and Keanu Reeve’s girlfriend and notice this isn’t always true. Plus most Hollywood hot actors are married or in long term partnerships. They didn’t choose their partners on just looks. Looks are what get everyone in the door. It’s not what keeps people around.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/26 11:22 AM
13

Nah I get it. It still would be wild for someone to admit out loud. You know how red pill men get upset women don’t automatically go for “good guys” because attraction isn’t a moral reward system? Men and women both generally respond to personality, or more accurately: vitality. Pretending men with options don’t respond to vitality is odd because it’s untrue. Unless you want to scrape the bottom of the barrel or be with a man looking to jump ship the moment a better option comes by, you gotta as…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/26 10:17 AM
0

Getting pregnant on purpose without the man’s consent and paternity fraud.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/26 10:11 AM
35

Desirable men already do this because they have options. Admitting you don’t care about personality or character for relationships is wild.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/26 10:06 AM
2

Good on you for not settling for unpleasant women!
/r/PurplePillDebate08/03/26 11:12 PM
2

Sometimes first hand experience is more helpful, unfortunately. Sometimes experiencing being treated in a shitty way also is more helpful in developing greater empathy.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/26 04:40 PM
3

Sure. I’m lucky I’ve never had trouble getting dates. I still can mess things up on a date if the man has high standards for himself.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/26 04:37 PM
3

Dude men have trauma dumped on me on plenty on dates. Sometimes even about their VERY recent ex they are hung up on. All kinds of people do this. And sometimes I do kinda want to hear about it tbh. It’s still a sign a person isn’t all that ready for a relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/26 04:27 PM
0

They have their own healing and learning to do. We’ve all hurt people even if not on purpose. If we are mature, we apologize, make amends (this is even more important than apologizing) and keep working on being a better person.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/26 04:26 PM
1

He learned he didn’t want to be like his dad (who is still a piece of shit when it comes to the treatment of women) and he’d rather be in a mutually respectful, peaceful relationship with an emotionally regulated woman. He also learned he didn’t find casual sex as fulfilling as meaningful sex, but that came a little later after realizing he didn’t want to be like his shitty dad.. By the way I used to be a real bitch like my mom. I realized after a couple years of dating that I hate arguing and d…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/26 04:23 PM
1

All experiences can be valuable especially if it teaches us to be better people.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/26 04:20 PM
3

Why would I argue or trauma dump? Because I used to not be very socially savvy. I’m not “neurotypical.” Now I know not to do that.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/26 04:18 PM
1

You wouldn’t be lying if you explained what to learned from friendships and family. Just say that.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/26 04:16 PM
4

Being weird. Trauma dumping. Bad jokes. Looking bad. Arguing. Being unpleasant and a scold. Etc etc
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/26 05:18 AM
0

You could answer what you’ve learned from your relationships with friends and family and how they have evolved.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 09:43 PM
2

He watched his dad beat his mom as a kid. He was dumb when it came to how to treat women. Now he takes care of his mom (even moved her into his house when she lost mobility) and doesn’t speak hardly ever to his dad who lives alone and none of his kids visit. His dad does text him red pill bullshit and he shows me and we laugh.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 09:12 PM
2

Sure and I’m more attractive to him because I have a lot of life, dating and sexual experience. I’ve grown and become a better person. I’m sexually confident and not coy. One of my favorite questions to ask men I might want to date is “what did you learn from your last relationship about yourself and how you approach relationships.” Growth and introspection is attractive. Such people make much better partners. Edited to correct grammar
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 09:11 PM
4

Actually it’s the opposite. They think they deserve negative treatment. Men can be that way too.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 09:09 PM
2

He hasn’t been a jerk to women for almost two decades. I think it’s safe to move on.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 09:03 PM
-1

Sure. It gave him experience. Everything gives us experience. The more we interact with people the more confident we usually are. Sleeping with a lot of men gave me confidence and experience as a woman. Made me have higher standards after I saw how great some men could be.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 09:02 PM
2

I was a party girl and treated men as disposable and usually dated several at a time. Had quite a few complaints from men that I was a cold hearted asshole. Was told I used them for sex, etc etc. I didn’t treat men like their feelings mattered until probably my late 20s tbh. I was polite and some would even say nice. But I was very selfish and didn’t really care about the men I dated.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 09:01 PM
-1

One of my best friends told me in high school she was a bully and she feels terrible about it now. Guess I should dump her as a friend too even though she’s a lovely person now. Sure my boyfriend is embarrassed he was like that nearly two decades ago and he’s changed, but he should probably die alone. Dude… People change all the time. People who work on themselves are often more pleasant to be around than people who either lack introspection to even see their flaws or just don’t want to do the w…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 02:07 PM
-2

I wouldn’t want him to judge how I acted in my early 20s. I was wild. He and I both grew as people.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 01:53 PM
4

That makes sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 12:40 PM
2

Former one. People change. He’s been nothing but kind to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 09:44 AM
1

He’s almost 40 now. He did this when he was young and dumb.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 09:42 AM
2

No. But also a lot of women don’t care about size.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 07:31 AM
12

When I was really really young I cared about messing up a date. Then I realized that isn’t a good way to connect. This is on you if you don’t enjoy your dates. Just use good manners, be interested in your dates, and use the time to assess whether YOU like HER.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 07:30 AM
1

Exactly. I’ve all but once had the higher sex drive in my relationships. If I like a guy and feel safe I basically want it all the time, and men can’t physically deliver that.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 07:28 AM
25

My boyfriend mentioned to me he used to be a jerk to women in his 20s. His family business is strip clubs so he was around a lot of strippers. He noticed being a jerk worked really well on some of them. I asked who didn’t being a jerk work on because it doesn’t work on me. I’m repulsed by jerks. He said “your father is nice to you and loves you, that’s why.” So yeah. Certain women and men respond well to jerks. Usually because they were primed to seek out love from difficult or cold people and h…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 07:24 AM
–

But we aren’t getting pumped and dumped. That’s a revenge fantasy. Most men who sleep with us want to stick around and want monogamy and commitment. At the very least they want companionship and the girlfriend experience without commitment.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/26 05:14 AM
–

I think she’s talking about his looks. I don’t find him attractive now, but about 20 years ago I thought he was pretty cute.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/26 03:50 AM
1

Oftentimes for me it’s just a certain look. It’s difficult to articulate because there isn’t one presentation. A man either has it or he doesn’t. I can’t grow into finding a man attractive if there isn’t some initial attraction on sight. Now if I already find a man attractive on sight, the way he behaves and his personality can make him much more attractive…. And sometimes much less attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 09:05 AM
7

Nah I got to have wonderful love affairs with a couple extremely handsome men who ended up having a lot of insecurities about money. I regret none of it. I have beautiful memories of those love affairs. I’m with a man now who makes decent money and isn’t insecure about my ability to make good money.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 05:17 AM
3

If all else was equal the 5’9 guy with high emotional intelligence as long as I found him attractive. No question. If neither were men who had faces or fitness levels I found attractive I’d rather have the 6’3 man with average emotional intelligence. Reason being, I want to be physically attracted to my partner. Long limbs/height are attractive to me even on chubbier men. Just being honest.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 02:10 AM
11

Handsome men aren’t less likely to commit. They just have high standards. Look at most Hollywood leading men. Most are married to another beautiful person.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 01:33 AM
7

It’s me choosing the best option for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 01:17 AM
10

Because while he’s not conventionally the most attractive he’s very much my “type.” He has long hair that’s thick and well maintained and the most gorgeous full lips. He’s also amazing (I do mean amazing) in bed. I don’t meet many men with long hair and I’ve always vastly preferred it on men. So he’s perfect looking for me even if technically his body might be better looking if he were 6’5. Why would I throw the baby out with the bath water? He has dated much younger strippers in the past who I’…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 11:54 PM
6

You could see it as them settling but they’re with people like themselves. Some of these traits a woman can control for (to a degree). We can diet and exercise. We can take out student loans if we have to and go to college or trade school. So if they’re settling for these men they’ve all decided to settle with themselves. OR they’re happy being a waitress all their life or are happy to be overweight because food is something they really enjoy and exercise is not.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 11:12 PM
6

Understands what they are feeling and is introspective about what is actually causing those feelings. Doesn’t immediately blame their emotional state on others. Has patience and emotional self-control. Able to apologize. Able to self regulate. Able to see the positive in situations and doesn’t catastrophize. Doesn’t become defensive immediately when issues are calmly brought up. Doesn’t people-please so much they build up a ton of resentment. Is able to maintain their own boundaries. Doesn’t tak…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 11:03 PM
10

I’d take tall or handsome over above average income. The 2 most conventionally handsome in the face guys I’ve probably ever dated were both average height and made less money than me. Our breaking up had nothing to do with their income or their height. The man I lived with the longest was 6’4, extremely physically fit and made like 150k a year but wasn’t emotionally very intelligent. Looking back neither was I very emotionally intelligent at the time. I loved him but eventually I got into therap…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 10:56 PM
9

No. Some women don’t really care about some of these things or if they do care, they can’t manage to get men with these traits. Women who didn’t want to go to college and are fine staying at a job that gives them little disposable income probably haven’t dated as many upper middle class men as me. Really overweight women probably haven’t dated as many fit men as me. It’s not really settling for them because they’re dating men like themselves. I value fitness in myself so it makes sense I value i…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 10:50 PM
16

Everything you’ve named I’ve basically achieved in every relationship. Occasionally one area will be a bit lacking but in that case in others he’ll be not just above average, but exceptional. But usually my boyfriends have checked all of these boxes. The one area they have been a bit lacking in occasionally is sometimes income, but then they’re usually exceptionally fit, tall and handsome. I have loved me some starving artists. Problem is, I make six figures. Usually such men would make an issue…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 10:35 PM
8

Men hunted in groups. Men gathered. Women hunted. There are generalizations to be made about who did what more often, but reducing this to “men hunted all alone and women gathered in groups” is inaccurate.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 03:12 PM
1

You’re conflating a lot with this sexually liberated talk. Having casual sex with people you meet usually involves some socializing with them. Sleeping with someone you already know and then immediately after never talking to them again is weird. It’s ghosting. Most men don’t like being ghosted by women either even when they never had sex. What is your deal with sluts. As a former slut in a relationship with a man who was a slut, we are fine. No STIs and very happy to be so experienced sexually.…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 03:10 PM
2

Yeah gorgeous people experience the whole “what’s beautiful must be good” bias in their favor. Goes for men and women. I never quite get why men are upset by this considering they do it as well. All I can figure is they think women deny it too much. Truth is, everyone denies it to some extent. Most people lack true introspection into their own behavior. Most people also subscribe to socially acceptable scripts about their own behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/02/26 03:23 AM
6

Not at first. The only two things I look for at first is do I find them attractive and are they not conservative. After that I screen for personality in the messages.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/02/26 02:29 PM
2

This is some bullshit broke men who aren’t hot say. They blame their problems on money because they dream one day they can get money. The truth is: money never once made a pussy wet. Millions of women are out here loving broke men who are attractive and the only thing they get out of it is attention and orgasms. If you don’t have a woman loving you it’s not because you don’t pay one enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/26 07:30 PM
7

Honestly? I don’t personally find that to be true. But I only date men who share my values and sense of humor. Men usually comment on my wit and intelligence as much as my body. My father always valued intelligence and a successful career in his girlfriends, and would brag about how successful they were to his friends. I seem to run in different circles than these red pill types. I pick men based primarily on looks first and then disqualify them if they don’t meet my personality standards. If th…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/26 10:18 PM
2

How do you think it would impact it? Do you think teenagers don’t realize a lot of what is sexual has to do with negotiated power dynamics?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/26 10:14 PM
7

I want to be chosen for both, personally. I choose men based on both.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/26 10:10 PM
3

If it made her happy, sure. Same with a man who wants to be lead around by a leash. I genuinely don’t give a fuck about how other people want to fuck. I care about how I want to fuck.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/26 10:09 PM
3

Safe sex practices and enthusiastic consent being a requirement is all I would teach anyone. I have no interest in influencing anyone’s sexuality beyond that.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/26 09:45 PM
0

I don’t regret any. It’s a foreign idea to me honestly. But I don’t do stuff like hook up with men I don’t like. I always like them in some way.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/26 09:02 PM
6

It wouldn’t occur to me to give a shit about who anyone is fucking providing it’s between consenting adults. Why do you care? But I love being hypersexual. Maybe people who aren’t horny all the time judge people idk. Sounds like a shitty life.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/26 09:00 PM
20

Most women are very interested in dating. What makes it more difficult for men is that women are more selective about looks, personality, character even etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/26 09:19 PM
3

The men are offering their bodies to me as well. And it didn’t hurt me. I’m telling you it was a lovely experience and I look back on it fondly. I know my own experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/26 03:55 PM
12

Yeah having sex for pleasure and fun is not like sex work at all. That’s fucked up.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/26 04:04 AM
9

My virtue is just fine and I’ve never been “only an object.” That’s a fucked up way to view sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/26 03:33 AM
10

I only speak for myself. I had a great time. Lots of fun dates where I rarely paid and lots of orgasms and cuddling and great shared food and interesting conversations. Never got an STI. Always used condoms and got my HPV vaccines. Women and men who want hoe phases will have them. Those who don’t, won’t. Nothing is wrong with either choice. Poor women and men turning to sex work is not like a hoe phase. That’s a job. Sex is a leisurely activity for me and the focus is on my pleasure.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/26 03:30 AM
12

What struggle have I had? I don’t have depression or anxiety or anything like that. My self esteem is high. What are you referring to? I don’t want anyone to suffer. I’m a nurse who went into nursing because I know what extreme physical pain is like as a burn survivor. I didn’t suffer as I said. I had amazing sex with interesting people. I orgasm within one minute of penetration or oral typically and almost always have multiple orgasms so the sex was a fun hobby for me. Women and men who suffer …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/26 02:27 AM
12

I don’t think people should or shouldn’t hoe around but I had a blast in my 20s dating tons of guys. Had someone to do something with every night of the week. Had sex every day. Learned how good sex can be with a man and never settled for anything less than amazing sex because I met so many men who were super generous so when one wasn’t I just never saw them again, no matter how good the emotional connection seemed. I’m very happy I had a hoe phase.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/26 01:06 AM
3

I didn’t say it was good. I said it simply is. I never said women have a lower sex drive. I have the sex drive of an 18 year old boy. Unfortunately I don’t want to date them as they’re far too young for me. I like chasing men, but I do it in a subtle way as a woman. I make it clear if they tried something I’d go along with it. That means laughing at their mediocre jokes, touching their arm, flirting, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/26 11:05 PM
1

This guy researches this for a living. Interesting man. https://www.instagram.com/reel/DTNuANsDe7P/?igsh=MWV5dmcxdno5d215Zw==
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/26 04:40 PM
1

That is self reporting, I had to find that study because what you linked got it from another study. Self reporting on mate preferences is pretty garbage. Comparisons between stated and revealed preferences shed light on gender differences and similarities: For attractiveness, men’s and (especially) women’s stated preferences underestimated revealed preferences (i.e., they thought attractiveness was less important than it actually was). For earning potential, men’s stated preferences underestimat…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/26 01:00 PM
1

Oh agreed. I know stay at home dads (two exactly) who were formally working in upper middle class professions, but generally men and women both are suspicious of such men. Both men have very high earning partners obviously and in their cases the wives love having house husbands, but they didn’t get married saying “I want you to make me a house husband.” And if they did, I’m not sure they would have bagged such high achieving women. Culturally we aren’t there yet.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/26 06:13 AM
1

Romantic preferences for women involve men who don’t have drivers licenses or credit cards. They have warrants for their arrest. I’m exaggerating for effect (but only slightly) but my point is: who we marry and who we crave and lust after are quite different sometimes (often times). Marriage has always been an economic unit. It’s a business deal. Who has what asset is what sometimes changes.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 04:12 PM
0

Also this isn’t totally true about women not caring about the appearance of status without wealth. There was a trend in America for some time where wealthy daughters of titans of industry married somewhat low ranking English nobility who didn’t have money to keep up their estates anymore. The men married the American new money for the money and the women married to get what money can’t totally buy: the appearance of “class.”
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 12:30 PM
1

You think women care if a man inherited a billion dollars vs pulled the rare Warren Buffet? You think women… wouldn’t want to marry a prince because he didn’t earn it? I think you’re overestimating women’s interest in ambition. You’re making women out to be less shallow than they are. The results matter. In fact an established through generations wealthy husband who isn’t constantly worried he’s going to lose it all would be ideal. Now if two people share a passion like a power couple who are ac…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 12:21 PM
2

Social compatibility is another way to say “approval from your social group and ability to integrate into it.” In other words: someone not of lower status. Your point about wealthy men being ok with their wives being stay at home mom’s doesn’t change this. She already is of high status. Being a stay at home mom in this day in age IS a status symbol. It makes him look good for a successful woman from wealth to choose to be a stay at home mom. Though plenty aren’t. Especially conservative women wi…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 11:35 AM
18

Because women are more selective. Men are supposed to peacock and woo us with their looks, athleticism, intellect and charm. This is true throughout the entire animal kingdom. Women want the healthiest, strongest, relatively young man because that’s going to produce the best offspring and women spend over 9 months dealing with pregnancy and all its potential complications. These are generalizations but they hold up most of the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 03:02 AM
8

Honestly we objectify each other in similar ways. Most men like women with status (it increases theirs) and most women like men who are handsome and fit. The difference is more how honest women and men are about what they want. Most people lie to others, themselves and God about what they want, who they want, and why they want it.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 03:00 AM
–

Women don’t catch feelings instantly. I’ve had plenty of sex with guys I thought were hot but had zero feelings for. Ask any woman with a lot of partners and she’ll say the same thing. Hell when I was younger I’d even date guys I didn’t have feelings for because they were cute. Now I would keep it just sex since I know how messy it can get if I don’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/25 09:30 AM
3

But I have platonic male friends and so do all my female friends…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/25 04:35 AM
2

Thinking hot guys sensually making out is hot isn’t the same as wanting it in real life. Hell I know lesbians who like watching gay porn. They definitely don’t want those men in their bedroom. But let’s say it is real life: To get laid? Nah it won’t stop men from getting laid. Could even help in casual sex settings. From getting in a relationship with an even just somewhat conservative woman? Absolutely. Same goes for women. Never known a guy who wanted his serious girlfriend to just start makin…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 04:58 AM
1

Agreed.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 04:34 AM
0

Two people enjoying kissing each other being gross is a foreign concept to me. It doesn’t always turn me on but I don’t think people kissing is gross.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 04:11 AM
1

That sucks. Been there myself.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 03:59 AM
1

How so?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 03:54 AM
1

How so?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 03:54 AM
1

Why does that make you angry? It couldn’t matter less.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 03:49 AM
3

I have travelled alone through North America, South American, and Europe a fair amount. Especially Europe. I’ve gone every year for a month for years. So I would have gone to Africa and the Middle East alone as a man.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 03:49 AM
1

I mean the number of straight men sticking things they shouldn’t (use toys people! Safety first!) up their butts is pretty high. Not sure why you’re so angry.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 03:30 AM
2

Oh they want him for sex, just not a relationship. A lot of women think the man will cheat or wants men more than women and is in denial about being totally gay. Also some will think it’s emasculating, yes. Especially receptive gay men. What women are attracted to for just sex and for relationships can differ greatly.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 03:20 AM
2

Right. Straight men aren’t imagining bull dykes who love pussy above all else. They want the women to actually want their dick over anything else. Same with the straight women. They want the men to want her more than each other. Humans like being desired.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 03:13 AM
2

Nerdy white collar men absolutely engage in relational aggression. Look at those bitches Trump and Musk. I live in the American south. Liberal women down here have guns.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 02:37 AM
3

Most women I know love when men sensually make out. Where it loses a lot of straight women is anal sex. But in erotic drawing and erotic fiction slash (male/male erotic fanfic and art) is SUPER popular with straight women so idk.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 02:34 AM
3

If you mean work out and groom, yes. If you mean be more feminine in style: for certain women, absolutely. Others won’t like it. I love masculine, androgynous and slightly feminine men. More conservative women typically don’t like feminine men in my experience. They want to be the princess aka “the prize.”
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 02:32 AM
3

Physically abusive men almost 100 percent of the time are emotionally abusive as well. Men and women both use emotional and physical abuse. Women just rely more on relational aggression because they’re smaller.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 02:30 AM
2

Yeah it’s really just something I have to adjust to but it can be disheartening when I think I’m doing an amazing job and they’re like “ah ah ah stop!” I thought I was doing good!
/r/PurplePillDebate09/12/25 12:24 AM
3

The only issue I ever had with foreskin was sometimes it makes the man really sensitive to oral. I enjoy giving oral but with some uncircumcised men I have to consciously be more gentle with my tongue and not be too direct with the head of the penis. This isn’t true for most uncircumcised men but I’ve only experienced it with uncircumcised. I’ve been with far more circumcised men as I’m American, and they never are too sensitive for whatever my tongue wants to do.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 11:42 PM
1

Plenty of extremely attractive women have had many sex partners. Plenty never lower their standards. Plenty of unattractive men just lower their standards to be with women society considers even less attractive than them. It’s no achievement.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 04:49 PM
4

How did you specifically protect these ex’s? Because it just sounds like women who were bigger than you just didn’t find you physically attractive which makes sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 03:32 PM
20

Women are keenly aware of how emotional men are and how that turns to violence quickly for many men. When women say they don’t need a man for protection they mean they don’t need their sex partner for protection. Frankly, he’s the person most likely to attack her in a fit of hurt and anger. Women support things like the justice system and law enforcement. Those men and women are paid to do their job.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 03:26 PM
3

Petting a kitten makes a ton of dopamine flood your system. Also: Eating rich foods. Viewing a sunset. Listening to a beautiful choir. Yet none of these things make a pussy wet. Resources also don’t make pussies wet. It just makes some people want to do what they have to in order to get access to those resources.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 02:38 PM
1

It’s decreased greatly over the past decades. By like half I think.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 02:02 PM
-1

People stay in relationships that make them unhappy usually because they: Don’t want to deal with a breakup Sunk cost fallacy tricks them Scarcity mindset Attachment is strong. Many people mistake attachment for love. Do it for the kids Do it to maintain their lifestyle What narrative do you believe is being pushed by rightfully pointing out single women are definitely not as a group less happy, often it’s the opposite.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 01:26 PM
-1

It’s bizarre how much this bothers men specifically. Most women do want to be in relationships. The ones they have just often make women less happy.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 01:17 PM
4

Resources have never made a pussy wet. That’s just not how they work. If they did there wouldn’t be so many marriages in nice houses with dead bedrooms. Women stay with broke men all the time. Poor men have more babies with more women than middle class men. Hot underemployed musicians, line cooks and bartenders get laid all the time. The men I’ve known who got the most pussy were starving artist types. Pretending hot broke men aren’t drowning in pussy is bizarre. It’s so evidently not true. A ch…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 12:57 PM
4

My vagina doesn’t care about land or resources. It cares if I find the man physically attractive. Beautiful expressive eyes, shiny thick hair, full lips, broad shoulders, a nice butt, long legs, defined hands, muscular back with a nice arch, etc etc. Land and resources matter to the mind, not the vagina. Vaginas are primal, and we didn’t evolve with the concept of land ownership or stored wealth. We evolved as nomads with no currency.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 11:53 AM
3

“Women are happier single” is not the same as “single women as a group are happier than married women.” Most people ideally would prefer to have a partner, but one who doesn’t decrease their happiness and yet everyday people stay with users, abusers, cheaters, etc. There is a credible, peer-reviewed evidence base showing that many single people (especially many single women) report high levels of life satisfaction, satisfaction with singlehood, and even sexual satisfaction. Some studies show sin…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 07:47 AM
17

Support for circumcision is influenced far more by religion, culture, region, and parental experience than by gender. Anecdotally I’ve seen men say they want their sons to have it so they’ll get laid more. In their mind women won’t like it if they aren’t in the USA. I’m against it as a practice on newborns and have never understood preferring one over the other for sex partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 07:43 AM
3

Are you seriously arguing that Denmark and America have similar homelessness rates? Something not being so doesn’t make that something impossible. I never said anything about a utopia. Even with every basic need met, there would still be depression and violence and heartbreak. Under democratic socialism people can have debt. Debt doesn’t kill you like not having food, water, shelter and health care.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 07:36 AM
2

Being debt free isn’t a basic human need. Housing is. Denmark has low homelessness compared to most Western countries (~0.05–0.1% of the population). They have extensive social housing programs and municipal responsibility for the homeless.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 07:16 AM
6

95 percent of feminists do not think patriarchy is a conspiracy theory. It’s a system, not a plot. It reproduces itself without conscious intent. Gerda Lerner (the most famous feminist I can think of who focused on this) argued it was constructed over time, not engineered like a conspiracy.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 07:13 AM
2

Someone who doesn’t know what communism is? How rare!
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 06:55 AM
5

Some idiot on Reddit might think this but feminist theorists don’t argue this.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 06:54 AM
2

Show us evidence CBT hasn’t helped people. It’s the gold standard of treatment for PTSD, eating disorders, OCD, depression, anxiety, addiction etc for a reason. Numerous meta-analyses show CBT outperforms control groups. I work in healthcare. Fuck no I’m not against all the hard fought laws that keep doctors and nurses safe. I don’t want HIV.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 06:52 AM
2

I’m not denying in group bias. I’m pointing out that it is irrelevant in this case. Women intervene more. Calling it favoritism (which is what you’re implying) is bizarre.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 06:50 AM
7

Oh you reject all science basically. Because you don’t like therapy. CBT has been repeatedly shown to be effective and it was invented by a man. This is widely supported by research. And he’s against worker safety laws. Of course. This is why MRAs fail. They pretend to care about things that hurt men, but they don’t want to actually do anything. They just want to control women.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 06:36 AM
5

Intervening while witnessing violence or harassment is “in-group bias.” Hahahahahaha
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 06:32 AM
9

You’re arguing against a stance about patriarchy no one other than maybe a 13 year old girl would have. Simone de Beauvoir and bell hooks never wrote about it being some evil conspiracy whose sole purpose is to subjugate women. It’s very clearly a system designed to dominate. It also became institutionalized.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 06:30 AM
14

You’re arguing against a stance about patriarchy no one other than maybe a 13 year old girl would have.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 06:28 AM
9

Yeah. Not sure your point. There were societies that were less focused on war. The war focused ones had an advantage over them though, obviously. They became what we would call colonized today.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 06:15 AM
5

Research generally shows that women are more likely than men to intervene when witnessing harassment or violence. https://www.researchgate.net/publication/359544978_A_Systematic_Review_Exploring_Variables_Related_to_Bystander_Intervention_in_Sexual_Violence_Contexts https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35343337/?utm_source=chatgpt.com https://nursing.ceconnection.com/ovidfiles/01263942-201404000-00005.pdf?utm_source=chatgpt.com https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/15248380221079660 https://online…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 06:13 AM
3

Strong welfare states.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 06:08 AM
6

We could start by making sure everyone has their basic needs met. But since men aren’t natural protectors or providers (they just sometimes guard what they consider their property) we don’t have that especially in America. Women aren’t naturally those things either.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 05:08 AM
6

Many feminists agree with what many men’s rights activists claim to care about. If MRA’s were serious about dealing with the horrible culture of rape in men’s prisons, depression rates in men by advocating therapy and treatment, pushed for stronger worker safety laws, pushed for more parental involvement from dads, etc, I’d call myself one. Unfortunately a lot of what most MRA’s do is just shit on feminism and bemoan no-fault divorce.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 05:07 AM
10

Feminism is to egalitarianism what the civil rights movement is to human rights: a targeted effort within a larger goal. You need specific movements to fix specific problems.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 04:37 AM
16

Only for travel. There are places in the world I won’t go alone as a woman. As a man I’d have travelled extensively in the Middle East and Africa by now. For everything else I’m glad to be a woman even if I’m taken less seriously. Men are often much kinder to women and I’m a straight woman so I appreciate it.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 03:47 AM
4

It is self-evidently true. It’s very obvious many women aren’t happy in relationships. It’s why women file for divorce so much. It’s why women in America now report wanting marriage and children less than men. Perhaps you just don’t get out much or have a broad social group.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 03:43 AM
12

And yet the happinest nations are the most egalitarian. Finland, Denmark, Iceland, Norway, the Netherlands, etc. consistently rank as the happiest. Afghanistan ranked least happy.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 03:38 AM
26

They’re not just rooted in religion. They’re rooted in hostile land takeovers. Patriarchy works if what you want is to make men soldiers and women baby factories that make more soldiers. And the point was never happiness, agreed. It was to acquire resources and often slave labor.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 03:35 AM
4

It has been repeatedly found that not only are single women much happier than single men, they are often happier than married women with kids. It’s pretty self evidently true as well. Kids also don’t make people happier. Parents report lower well being and higher stress repeatedly. Happiness of parents peaks when children leave the home. What is interesting is how much this bothers people. As if the point of having children was ever just to make the parents happy.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 03:32 AM
5

From what I’ve seen this isn’t an opinion, it’s what studies have shown. So you’re just rejecting the science. I think what the data really show is that a lot of women are in relationships they should leave. The good relationships are worth it and maybe people could find them if they didn’t stay in unhappy relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 01:58 AM
2

Why does it matter if it’s not an achievement? To be frank: most men who have slept with a lot of women just lowered their standards to do so. It isn’t a “achievement” for them either. But ultimately what does it matter anyway?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/12/25 01:52 AM
1

“Take advantage of?” No one is getting taken advantage of in consensual sex between adults. They’re just having sex because sex is pleasurable. Again with the revenge fantasy: “behind the Waffle House.” Who is doing this? This is the behavior of an unhinged person.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/12/25 09:08 PM
1

Disliking the order of photos? You genuinely believe women are turning down attractive, friendly seeming guys because of the order of their photos? “Just ask” is the level of low effort I see. As long as you write something that seems kind and genuine, you’re golden. Also, pumped and dumped? This is a revenge fantasy men have about women who reject them. “Yeah? well men don’t really want you either!” Most people aren’t having one night stands and then getting ghosted. I’m someone who has casuall…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/25 05:58 AM
1

Being less picky isn’t the same as being indiscriminate. But I don’t care if men are indiscriminate personally.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/25 10:56 PM
1

The reason women go after fewer men is because women are more selective. Period. All females of all animals species are more selective. That’s why the male of all species is more ornamental and prettier and the females are drab (I’m including humans in this because no way can you look at the body of an Adonis in his prime and not see how visually stunning a display it is). Because males have to woo females. Women would be more selective no matter what. Edited to add: also a lot of men’s profiles…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/25 09:18 PM
1

Sure. Work out. Dress in a flattering way. Fix your teeth if you need to. Have a flattering hair style (rarely does a buzz cut look good). Work on being a better conversationalist. Don’t trauma dump. Go to therapy. Learn how to flirt well and without expectation. Be a good listener. Be actually interested in the women your pursuing as a person. Go out a lot to the same places. Have a bar you like going to every week. Chat up the regulars. Make more friends as this will allow you to meet their fr…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/25 09:14 PM
1

Relinquish what rights?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/25 09:09 PM
–

Feminists typically are leftists. Supporting striking workers and unionization is central to that.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/25 08:53 PM
0

Couldn’t do war? Ok even if true what’s your point? If men all want to just not defend themselves and resign themselves to die, that’s on y’all. Most war isn’t hand to hand combat now though
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/25 08:13 PM
2

Hire only men. Look at the edited one.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/25 08:11 PM
8

What makes you think employers would hire only men? During war women take over male dominated jobs. Also what is your point? Most doctors (to be clear I mean non boomer aged, most med school grads are now women) and nurses (and all medical professionals truly) are women. You don’t see people on this sub talking about “if women quit men would all die slow painful deaths.” It’s a silly talking point.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/25 08:08 PM
3

What is the lie though?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/25 08:07 PM
5

What lie?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/25 06:41 PM
4

If a woman doesn’t protect her child or make sure that child is cared for society does blame the woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/25 06:39 PM
7

“That tolerance is finite.” Why is that? Are you suggesting many men wish women to not have rights?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/12/25 06:36 PM
0

No. I like novelty and variety. Also there is no perfect person.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/25 10:33 PM
1

Completely agree but would soften the language and timeline. If you don’t feel like the other person is physically attracted to you after four to five dates I’d consider moving on. Sometimes people are just shy the first couple of dates.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/25 08:16 PM
–

The consensus is that men and women tend to say certain things when self reporting but then behave quite similarly. Women overstate how much they care about earning power and men understate how much they care. In reality people tend to want someone from the same socio economic class. But there are countless examples of men marrying up, especially ambitious men.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/25 08:15 AM
–

Hm. Perhaps. I will say when women complain about getting “used” I am always confused. Don’t give men money you don’t want to give them and definitely don’t have sex except to get the pleasurable experience for YOU. Just like being nice to someone doesn’t earn you a relationship neither does spending money or having sex with them. Be nice, generous with your money, and have fun with sex because you want to, not with an end goal in mind. Maybe part of the reason I have good outcomes is because I …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/25 07:13 AM
–

It’s super misandrist to say dudes only think about tits and ass. I don’t know why men say shitty things about themselves like this. I don’t know anything about this “pump and dump”thing. Every man I’ve ever dated wanted to hang out all the time and talk on the phone for hours etc. etc. Of course we had sex plenty too, but that’s a huge part of why I was in the relationship as well. I always have more orgasms than men so I don’t relate to people who feel “used” by sex. I have sex to have sex and…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/25 06:55 AM
–

Good. Now if only red pill men would regularly admit plenty of men are attracted to women for their money. Lotta men want a provider who they also get to sleep with because hey, she’s cute enough. Sounds a lot like the women I’ve described.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/25 06:31 AM
–

And some women take on “hobosexuals” (often very physically attractive men but truly not always) thinking it will give them power. Women with some money do the same thing sometimes with broke pretty boys. Let them move in with them, use their car, even consign loans and make payments. This is all way more common than red pill types want to admit for some reason. Lots of people look for a cheat code for love where they get to be the powerful ones.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/25 06:16 AM
–

The literature doesn’t show this: From Northwestern University: True to the stereotypes, the initial self-reports of male participants indicated that they cared more than women about a romantic partner’s physical attractiveness, and the women in the study stated more than men that earning power was an aphrodisiac,” said Paul Eastwick, lead author of the study and graduate student in psychology in the Weinberg School of Arts and Sciences at Northwestern. But in reality men and women were equally …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/25 05:51 AM
–

Women are more selective about all things, including looks. When women are secure and confident they are pickier about all things especially looks and character. Sometimes women, in a sort of power play, go for “golden retriever” “medium ugly” guys with money because they want to hold the reins in the relationship. But look how women describe these men online: like ugly dogs. They don’t respect these men. You don’t respect someone you call “medium ugly.” These women don’t want to be alone but do…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/25 05:50 AM
-2

You forget men are also attracted to narcissists. People rate both female and male narcissists as more attractive. After experiencing a narcissist and maturing, normal people stop being attracted to them. This is the whole women like bad boys and men like crazy psycho bitches stereotype comes from. It’s only true of the young and immature, and yes, it’s something seen in both sexes. Charisma, aggressive sexuality and confidence can attract most people especially the inexperienced. Men and women …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/25 05:08 AM
1

Clinton dated UP. He was from a poor family and Hillary was from a well to do family. And yes, marrying. Don’t you know women sleep with “bad boys” with no jobs but don’t usually want to marry them? Yes men and women marry for social reasons. Red pill men talk about the female dual mating strategy all the time. “Alpha fucks, beta bucks” and all that.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/25 02:58 AM
-2

Women evolved to find tall muscular men attractive. Humans didn’t evolve along side the concept of stored wealth. For the vast majority of human history wealth couldn’t be stored. That’s why young strong men are naturally sexually attractive to women. Women also didn’t evolve in a world where men were the providers. Women also were involved in hunting and gathering. They didn’t sit down and stare at babies all day. Everyone had to be involved in acquiring food. What isn’t natural, but is learned…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/25 01:52 AM
1

Normal successful men don’t want to marry a woman others see as a “bum” though. Men with options generally prefer to marry within their socioeconomic class. Also: dowries. If you want examples of important male leaders in America who married above their social class: Washington, Hamilton, Clinton, even JD Vance … Obama certainly didn’t date down.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/11/25 01:46 AM
16

Birth control. Less stigma for being child free. More financial freedom for women so we don’t need to be married and have kids to please our husbands just to live a comfortable ish life.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/25 04:01 PM
8

Men are not organized in such a way where this matters. Men are quite deeply divided on many issues.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/25 11:48 AM
–

Yes. It’s unrealistic and can cause people to over look a lot of issues, even abuse.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/11/25 11:42 AM
1

Ok…. Be good at sex with someone who is def positive? Problem solved?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/25 04:48 PM
1

Ohhh girls and women are a hive mind. Ok.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/25 04:55 AM
1

Yeah and you agreed men want their friends to think their girlfriend is hot
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/25 03:28 AM
1

Cool you played Russian roulette and claim to have won
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/25 03:10 AM
1

What evidence do you have of this? Because plenty of my friends have dated men we all hated and thought were assholes but they kept dating them until it inevitably exploded. Usually they kept dating the guys because they were hot, the sex was good, and they had like trauma bonded or some other toxic shit lol
/r/PurplePillDebate14/11/25 03:10 AM
5

Oral sex. Dated 3 men who hated giving it and one who hated getting it (too sensitive). I enjoy both immensely. I don’t want anyone to do something they dislike for my pleasure because I don’t enjoy that and I don’t want to learn to enjoy that. You can’t always learn to like things. I never learned to like coffee even though I tried hard. Doesn’t make me wrong. Just means people like different things.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 09:00 AM
3

Yeah this is bullshit. I’ve broken up with men once I realized they didn’t like performing oral sex. They said they did. But they clearly didn’t. Which is fine. They should be with someone who doesn’t want oral sex. There’s no working through that. He likes what he likes and I like what I like. No one is wrong. But it’s a fundamental incompatibility. Edited to add: broken up with men who really wanted to do stuff I didn’t want too. There is nothing less sexy than COMPROMISE during sex. Always ne…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 08:00 AM
5

Sex being an amoral act is found in many cultures that don’t participate in capitalism or neoliberalism. This is well studied in anthropology. Capitalism LOVES the nuclear family. That’s the new invention. Before people lived in community and inter generationally. But that means buying way less stuff. So we were sold the 1950s idea of what success is. Plenty of successful cultures have children living at home way after 18 and are shocked we put people in nursing homes. You know Shakespeare marri…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 07:58 AM
2

Yall act like it takes skill to get hot women but the truth is hot women just usually date hot men. Jacob Elordi would be drowning in pussy no matter what he does. It’s not skill. He didn’t pursue me we were friends first and he fell for me over the course of a year while we got very close. He kept trying to get me to do stand up comedy (his ex did stand up) because he found me so entertaining. When I’m not talking about “used goods” I’m very funny. So basically I won him over and to be honest i…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 07:49 AM
5

Men who talk about it: Scott Galloway on CNN Jordan Peterson on countless platforms professor Neil on instagram All three are professors
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 07:20 AM
4

If you’re willing to commit without knowing how someone is in bed, you don’t value sex a lot in a relationship. By very definition. Pledging to be with someone without knowing how they are in bed very clearly means it’s not a priority for you. I didn’t say anything about whether someone cares about you. You’re moving the goalpost here.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 07:17 AM
4

It took skill for me to get him as a boyfriend. He was way hotter than me! But he liked my personality because I’m delightful in real life. Calling someone “used goods” is meant to be inflammatory and you’re being dishonest by pretending it isn’t. Yes, it’s insecurity. Sometimes justified insecurity in some way, but it’s insecurity about the relationship. And/or they view sex as a dirty act that defiles a woman which makes them terrible lovers.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 07:15 AM
5

It’s not a higher standard. It’s a different standard. Sex is a morally neutral act (between consenting adults obv).
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 07:12 AM
4

Only has sex once committed? That means she doesn’t care much about sex. I’ve always slept with men before committing, though I have had men try to commit so early we hadn’t had a chance to have sex yet. That seemed suspicious to me and my suspicions were correct. Those were always men who idealized me, and of course eventually I didn’t live up to their ideal. No he’s calling them “used goods.” He sees women as not full people and he is insecure about his abilities in bed and/or has been cheated…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 06:44 AM
7

The fact she’d be willing to marry someone without knowing how he is in bed tells me everything I need to know about how she would view sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 06:14 AM
3

Yeah I wouldn’t really want a virgin long term. Because I like good sex! But I did enjoy taking a young man’s virginity but it was all psychological. His expressions were priceless and he was so flustered. Definitely didn’t want to deal with that long term. Plus he was super religious which is how he was still a virgin at 25.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 05:07 AM
-1

Yeah. And men care if their friends approve of their girlfriends. So what?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 04:44 AM
2

Perhaps. The same is definitely true of men. Men never seem to care if I can hold a conversation. They like bragging to people that I make great money and like that I dress to look hot but in an old money style. It’s odd to me when men on here say they don’t care if a woman makes good money. The doctors and lawyers I’ve dated were always openly into dating high achievers and would make comments about not wanting to go “down in lifestyle” because of a woman. I dated a poor starving artist who alw…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 04:43 AM
6

Yeah marrying someone who never had sex seems like a recipe for a dead bedroom.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 04:40 AM
3

They don’t look like body builders. All that matters is how they look I don’t really care how they achieve it.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/11/25 02:05 AM
2

Then lean build. I prefer a lean build like Olympic swimmers. Not bulky. Broad shoulders and a tapered waist and a back with an obvious curvature. Profile should look like a squiggly line in the back side.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/25 07:46 AM
1

I “chase” (though not the best word really) sex and commitment and in my experience it’s men who want to bring up the exclusivity talk super soon and they’re the first to say “I love you.” Studies back this up. Men want commitment sooner and profess love sooner. Studies also show that these days men crave love, commitment, marriage and even children more than women, at least in the USA. https://www.cnbc.com/amp/2025/10/18/new-data-men-are-more-likely-to-rush-down-the-aislenot-women.html https://…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/25 07:41 AM
7

If you’re only having sex because someone promised you something you’re not having good sex. People have sex to have sex. Good sex isn’t a business transaction or contingent on some promise or lie. It’s good because you had a great time. Or it’s not good.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/25 05:52 AM
1

Men aren’t only chasing sex. Women who don’t date men who like them think like this. All my ex’s wanted to hang out with me all the time and talk to me in the phone all the time. Often I wanted sex more than them (most men have a refractory period that leaves a lot to be desired on a long Saturday night). It’s really weird and degrading when men or women talk like this about men. Yall need to start dating people you give a shit about and who give a shit about you. You won’t think like this anymo…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/25 05:03 AM
5

I’ve never heard of Adriana Lima. She’s odd for marrying an ugly man though. Why would you have sex with someone you aren’t attracted to? That’s some deranged shit. The type of shit a model who publicly apparently stayed a virgin until almost 30 would do. That’s some real pick me shit. Meanwhile, hot guys like Pitt and Depp got with women who very obviously had been with other men. Why didn’t she just do that? Sounds like a moron. My mother was certainly not a virgin when she married at 30 nor w…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/25 03:55 AM
4

The most handsome and the richest men in the world don’t even marry or date virgins. Brad Pitt and Johnny Depo in their prime weren’t shacking up with virgins and Bill Gates and Jeff Bezos are with women who already have children from other men.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/25 03:20 AM
3

Those men are either quite young, quite conservative or virgins themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/25 03:13 AM
1

In my experience, cheating is sought out. People aren’t just randomly placing themselves in positions where cheating is likely. They get off on it. Your take is naive and sweet, but nah. Cheaters want to cheat. That’s how they end up tipsy and alone with someone they’re attracted to or however it goes. They set the circumstances up.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/25 02:55 AM
2

It is insecurity coming from men or women. It is sometimes controlling. You’re allowed to be insecure. Just own it. If I dated a guy with a bunch of gorgeous female friends who seemed interested in him I might be jealous but I can own up to the fact that it would stem from insecurity.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/25 02:52 AM
2

I prefer a swimmer’s body. I don’t go for bodybuilder builds. Lean muscles are extremely attractive. Steroids are a big no from me. Don’t they decrease sex drive usually and cause ED?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/25 02:50 AM
2

A 7/10 is considered a handsome man though, not just “not ugly.” I don’t have to “get to know” a 7/10 to find them attractive. Getting to know them might make them less attractive but that’s another story.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/25 02:48 AM
3

Gonna make this list form: Most non virgin men over a certain age are freaked out by sleeping with a virgin woman, in my experience. Probably feels like a lot of pressure. Any man who uses the term “304” is either chronically online or barely 18. I never hear men use this in my personal life and at least half my friend group is men who do openly talk about sex with me. They certainly don’t call women “whores.” As for household duties, yeah that’s a cultural thing unfortunately. Many boys had mom…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/25 02:46 AM
1

Sure it’s the cultural standard. The standard for leading handsome men while I grew up was shaved chests so I myself am firmly and I mean FIRMLY anti-chest hair or any hair not on the head really. But I’m a natural red head and a surprising number of men really want me to go full bush and since my leg hair is blonde I’ve found a lot of men kinda like it? I prefer shaving my legs but I’ve indulged some men.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/25 02:38 AM
2

I know women and men who love body hair on their partners! Different strokes indeed.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/25 02:24 PM
4

Really nice, soft longish hair No mental health issues that aren’t being addressed aggressively. Good relationship with their family (usually indicates being emotionally well regulated as unfair as that is). Thinks I’m hilarious and makes me laugh as well Sharp canines Bare minimum is not being right wing but bonus points for being extremely progressive politically Exercises quite often Really attractive hands Tall Nice laugh Can afford to go on international vacations with me as I do that often…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/25 10:54 AM
3

Yes. When I was young. Lust is a powerful drug.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/11/25 04:58 AM
13

Is it intelligent for southern men and women to use indirect communication more often than their northern counterparts? This is like asking if African American vernacular English is “intelligent.” The answer is: if the intended audience understands the style of communication you are using, then it is effective and therefore perfectly reasonable. I’m not originally from the Deep South so I had to learn this. Natives here understand their own communication style. Why would gender roles start once …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/25 08:26 AM
13

A couple of reasons: Because in the American Deep South communication is often very indirect to the point of passive aggression. This is well understood by linguists. Women are less likely to say no to things and are more likely to use signaling behavior. I once watched my grandmother give her daughter-in-law a full blown going away party with cake and balloons instead of just asking her directly to move out of my grandmother’s guest room. Secondly, gender roles are more entrenched in conservati…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/25 08:14 AM
11

According to the men who have told me this (some on second dates where they said they were surprised I went out with them again) it’s because they assumed an interested woman wouldn’t try so hard to pay.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/25 07:58 AM
15

Only dating people you want to have sex with isn’t transactional. That’s like saying only being friends with nice people is transactional.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/25 07:56 AM
12

Because I live in a conservative area where indirect communication is common and men have told me when I don’t let them pay in the first date they assume I’m not interested.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/25 07:55 AM
16

I think a lot of yall have just managed to not date people who like you. I’ve never felt used in a relationship or been a user. We both enjoyed the regular sex and after the first few dates I always tried to split the check with men. Quite a few kept insisting on paying but I always offered and usually every once in a while they’d let me pay. My man right now though is a poor adjunct professor and he’s soooo handsome. I actually pay for most of our vacations and sometimes I feel like I’m using h…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/09/25 07:15 AM
–

I think often it’s just the handsome guys get away with bad behavior. It’s not that deep.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/09/25 07:09 PM
1

Incorrect. Many women lust after attractive male physiques. Being tall and lean is a reliable predictor of whether women find a man attractive. Long legs with a lean, v-shaped torso and a firm round bottom will attract women. We are all socialized to think of women as the object and men as the subject, and yet women went crazy over that Jeremy Allen White Calvin Klein ad. And he’s a short king on top of it all! Considering how socialized we are to see the woman as an object, the fact that women …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/25 10:19 AM
–

And women fuck whoever they want to fuck. Doesn’t matter what other women think. But generally speaking humans tend to like social approval of their mating choices if possible. If not possible, then we choose sex over no sex. Tate is the guru of many with outdated views on what is natural for a gender and even he admits he has the cars and the girls to impress the boys.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/25 01:35 AM
–

Men show off women to other men all the time and worry if their boys think their woman is hot or not. Andrew Tate even talks about how he likes women on his arm to impress other men and he doesn’t even actually like having sex with them. It’s all about what other men think. Men think their idols have the hottest women but not because they’re the hottest: it’s because they want what their idols have.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/25 11:33 AM
3

You found an exception. But this has been studied. I didn’t just observe this on my own.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/25 06:01 AM
5

Agree somewhat but: Men are ornamental. They have broad shoulders and height and gorgeous backs and asses and hands and faces and, and, and. Baldness isn’t universal in men. It seems to be a European and Middle Eastern problem. Interestingly, ethnic groups that don’t tend to bald due to genetics have long hair as a standard for men, especially warriors. Native Americans and Asian men are good examples of this.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/25 01:45 AM
–

Estrogen increases sex drive and in men is essential for erectile function and spermatogenesis. A normal level of estrogen in men is 10-40 pg/ml. In women it’s 100 times that. Normal levels can literally be 400 pg/ml in women. Women don’t have semen at all. Men don’t have eggs. Does men not ovulating and having such low estrogen mean no orgasm? The dopamine thing is false but you have to know that. Women do actually have refractory periods, just not like men. Women can mate many times in a short…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/25 01:06 PM
–

Let me rephrase: which anatomy and hormones? Which ones do you think women don’t have that are necessary for orgasm?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/25 07:29 AM
–

What anatomy and hormones are required for orgasm? Doesn’t the tiny clitoris have twice the nerve endings as the penis? Of course oral sex would result in orgasm. This has got to be trolling.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/25 01:26 AM
1

Dating an older man doesn’t mean preferring older men. I don’t prefer older men at all but I dated a guy almost ten years older than me once because he pursued me relentlessly. I broke up with him and got with a man my age. I think the data shows most women marry men within a year or two of their age. That’s why I see in my real life as well. I’ve also dated much younger men because they pursued me quite hard and let’s be real here young men tend to look really good. Doesn’t mean I prefer men te…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/25 08:17 PM
1

Hm interesting. I definitely think women are more violent than we all admit. Maybe but I read that this is from one study that didn’t specify who the abuser was as in it could have been a man from their past. I wish someone would do another study.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/25 04:55 AM
7

I didn’t realize very young women were already jaded. They are the ones who immediately label middle aged men creeps. Middle aged women like the middle aged men who have taken care of their health and appearance.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/25 11:32 PM
5

Men make more than women overall, even in the same industries. Men tend to want to make more money especially if they want children. Women tend to be the ones to take a few years off to care for babies. How could it not end up that more often than not men are the breadwinners? Statistically that’s bound to happen. Women and men care about earning power. They just care about looks and loyalty and general vibes way, WAY more. And men understate how much they care about earning power. Women oversta…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/25 08:10 AM
0

Minimum height is like 5’8. Preferred is 6’4. Was with a 6’5 man for a while. It’s just ever so slightly too tall. 6’3-6’4 is the sweet spot. My biggest celebrity crushes and crushes back in college were no where near that tall. Being tall makes men hotter. Height does NOT determine whether you’re hot. I’ve met tons of average height and lower guys who made me absolutely swoon. Fitness level: flat stomach but not a flat butt. I prefer some defined muscles (not too big) but I’m attracted to men w…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/25 07:59 AM
4

The first one is of over ten thousand people in several countries on different continents. And a similar study was done ten years ago conducted in roughly the same way with similar results.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/25 07:44 AM
4

No. They don’t. Men and women both value looks, loyalty, and feeling positive emotions around their partner most. Just a few sources. The first link shows what men and women really prefer in a partner, not just the societal talking points they parrot: This registered report—partnered with the Psychological Science Accelerator—uses a highly powered design (N=10,358) across 43 countries and 22 languages to estimate preference-matching effect sizes. The most rigorous tests revealed significant pref…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/25 07:39 AM
10

When I’ve had flings I had zero idea what their dicks would be like until their pants came off. I don’t pick out men from a line up of dick pics.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/25 07:36 AM
12

If you’re in person, touching, and say that, it could be hot. It’s super risky, but it could be hot. Nothing about the message was hot. It was insulting and entitled.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/25 08:27 AM
13

Messaging that to a woman is not going to go well because it’s clumsy and crass. In person it could work except he said it was boring hanging out with her. Insulting a woman and then saying let’s just fuck over a text is going to end in a bad time.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/25 08:22 AM
14

Can you quote where I made it a binary? I know it’s not. When I was single I enjoyed dating lots of men and eventually having sex with them while knowing I didn’t want to marry them. I just wanted to experience a lot of fun and excitement and it was extremely fun and exciting. No binary was mentioned here
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/25 07:53 AM
27

“Cut the small talk.” He was saying he wanted to “get to the point.” He was telling her he was tired of getting to know her and wanted to bang. That’s offputting and clumsy to boot. He said dating her is boring. He doesn’t like her. Men who like the woman enjoy the dates. The way to introduce sex is to start by initiating light physical contact. Sit close. Hug or kiss at the end of dates. The rest comes naturally. I know that’s a frustrating answer but that’s how it happens in my experience. Wha…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/25 06:48 AM
3

Disagree only in that EVERYONE should go their own way instead of being with someone whose character they don’t like. Plenty of men and women and nonbinary people have serious character flaws. Leave them alone.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/25 06:43 AM
–

I’ve met plenty of hot short guys. They were hot in other ways. Tall is just one way to be attractive. A guy with a toned body or nice face or great hair is still going to be attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/25 06:41 AM
1

Terrible relationship material. They can be fun for casual relationships because they can be exciting. Think about “party girls” or “crazy chicks” men talk about. They can be fun, but most mature people know a serious relationship with them in their current form is unwise.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/25 04:18 AM
13

The swim teams. My god. Adonis after Adonis
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/25 11:26 AM
6

I know you agree. I was just giving a possible explanation for why some women say this.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/25 08:45 AM
5

In my experience those women are either looking for money from a man, lesbians who don’t realize it yet or they don’t consider themselves attractive. Last option is they don’t really consider men they aren’t attracted to options. So, when they say they care more about personality, they’re assuming who they’re talking about is already attractive to them. Between two attractive men that woman would chose the more compatible guy over the guy who maybe had a more fit body. If you want to see women t…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/25 08:28 AM
11

Ugly gross men can absolutely have lots of casual sex. They just have to make it a hobby of theirs and have almost no standards. Some of the biggest players I’ve known who cheated on their wives were men where I didn’t even understand how they got a wife. They got laid because one of their goals in life was to get laid all the time. They made everything sexual even in public like those women you talk about. These men’s behavior turned many women off. But there’s a type of woman who likes horndog…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/25 06:21 AM
28

Yeah I hate watching TikTok edits of rugby players.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/25 06:13 AM
12

I hear women complain all the time men don’t moan enough in porn or during sex. If that’s not about enjoying the man’s pleasure, what is?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/25 01:00 AM
24

Yeah plenty of us do. It’s really weird to pretend we don’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/25 12:59 AM
85

You’re talking about object of desire affirmation. It’s stereotyped as being more common in women and women are certainty socialized to objectify themselves and see themselves through the male gaze. BUT whenever women ask on Reddit “what do men wish women would to in bed” the top answers always have to do with “make me feel wanted” or a related desire: “be enthusiastic about me.” Both men and women enjoy being the objects of desire and both men and women enjoy lusting over each other as objects …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/25 12:55 AM
–

Interesting perspective. I see what you mean.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 10:56 PM
9

For every year older one partner is than the other the divorce rate goes up. That surprised me. A 3 year age gap has a statistically higher chance of divorce than a 2 year one.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 10:50 PM
–

Agreed. Both men and women so often operate from a scarcity mindset. If it’s not working, leave. Being alone is ten times better than being with a partner who makes you feel lonely or unhappy.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 10:48 PM
–

I see what you’re saying! But there is reasoning. Intuition means there isn’t reasoning. If he doesn’t call you for a week? He doesn’t like you that much. If he makes you always drive to his side of town and never comes to yours? He doesn’t like you that much. If he makes remarks about how the waitress is so good looking? He doesn’t like you that much. It’s using reasoning but women have been taught to not trust their reasoning. They’re even told to call it “intuition” because our lady brains ju…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 10:46 PM
3

I demand nothing. I receive.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 09:17 PM
2

They aren’t his dream girl. That’s the point.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 09:05 PM
12

The idea that young women find 50 year old men as attractive as 30 year old men is laughable. I glanced at this “study.” It’s of computer generated images, correct? Yes that is correct it’s computer altered images to simulate age. The purpose of the study was for plastic surgeons to use? Everything about this is weird. I know it sounds appealing to think you stay as attractive up until 50 and then only slowly decline but that isn’t true for men or women and that is blindingly obvious.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 09:00 PM
2

Healthy men want their dream girl to be happy. They want her to be sexually fulfilled. How men with money usually partially do this, is by paying for dates. You can swear up and down it isn’t true, but a man doesn’t want to fumble his dream girl. He also will commit. If he’s not committing, you ain’t the one baby. It’s not rocket science.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 08:51 PM
2

Clearly he saw little benefit. He wanted a poor starving artist like himself. He ended up with a stand up comedian, actually. Not a successful one. She was a bartender to make rent. And I ended up with a man with money who isn’t threatened by me taking trips (he takes trips too) and having financial freedom. By the way I would have taken him on trips. We only dated for like 3 months. We remained friends for a couple years after. I understand why he didn’t want to continue seeing me. But it was b…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 08:47 PM
2

I can see this being the case. As I said, it bothered him a lot I had so much more money and he repeatedly talked about his ideas of how to eventually make a lot of money.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 08:44 PM
4

Men don’t think they should provide for the mother of their children? Or protect them? Glad that kinda “love” never found me. Pregnancy isn’t 50/50. Biology isn’t 50/50. Breastfeeding and bed rest before and after labor and all that time off work isn’t shared 50/50. If a man wants a family, he knows he’s expected to protect and provide, and as I’ve said, in modern times providing is how you protect. If he doesn’t want a family, then sure why would he do any of that. Well, he still would for his …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 08:41 PM
1

I never said men should pay or should eat me out until I orgasm four times. But if they liked me how I want them to like me, they would.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 08:38 PM
4

I was socialized to be financially independent too. But guess what? Men are socialized to be providers. You weren’t socialized to provide I bet, were you? The men you date were. They can swear they were raised by radical, militant feminists and weren’t. But they picked up on social programming. Just like women pick up on programming about a messy house being a reflection of their character, but not a man’s. Because men are just naturally messy, right? Women have an obligation to be clean and mak…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 08:35 PM
–

Yeah I don’t think it’s intuition as much as trusting yourself. I remember a woman asking me once if I thought a man who said sexist things to her on a date was just joking. I told her no. She asked why. I just stared at her and said “because he didn’t say he was joking.” Like, girl. Come on. A lot of people make excuses for bad behavior or just hear what they want to hear instead of what the person across the table is literally telling them.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 08:30 PM
2

Because I’m not giving someone like 40k for a car? Trips are fun things we do together. The clothes I buy them I want to see them wear because it’s sexy. Seeing him in a car I bought doesn’t turn me on or make me happy. Well now I want a boyfriend so I have one. I’ve enjoyed fuck buddies in the past.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 12:15 PM
7

Wilder and wilder girl lol. Disliking getting multiple orgasms is a new one. I’m trying to remember if a man has ever said to me “I don’t really care much for my dick being licked. Women don’t go down women are afraid of dick.”
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 12:13 PM
10

Yeah the horror stories I hear about shock me. I met a few bad eggs but as you said they didn’t exactly make it subtle. We never had a second date. Horrible women and men usually tell on themselves. I think a lot of people are in denial about how toxic someone they find cute is. They let these men give them cagey answers and end up in emotionally murky situationships because they didn’t stand on business in the beginning. I am begging young women to block a man the moment he tries to make you un…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 12:07 PM
1

It’s my money. I go through workaholic phases where I make a ton of money and buy property with it. I lucked out with property. I don’t have the money to like buy him a car but yeah I’ve been the one who pays for all the trips and dates and buys them clothes and stuff.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 12:03 PM
15

Honestly sucking someone off on a first date is kinda wild and I used to be wild. And then you didn’t even get any in return you just serviced him? Like girl what? If I were a guy I’d think you had low self esteem. And no girl normal men who actually like you aren’t afraid of your pussy. That’s a wild belief.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 11:58 AM
3

For real. If a man goes down on me I expect PIV as the finale. Of course he thought it would go further.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 11:48 AM
2

He was extremely good looking which was a fair trade off. I’ll support a pretty boy. I’ve done it twice before. But if I’m honest I wouldn’t be interested in a forever relationship. But I’ll play sugar mama for a solid year, year and a half. I don’t imagine his ego would have allowed for us to last super long term. Men often want to be admired. I admired his art which he liked at first. But then money kept coming up. From him; not me. I didn’t talk about it unless he did.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 11:47 AM
7

??? Men go down on women usually. I’ve had a lot of casual sex and quite a few long term relationships. I can think of one guy who didn’t like going down and he later came out as asexual. Why would a straight man be afraid of pussy? Straight men want to bury their face in pussy lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 11:44 AM
1

Aaaand now I realize men don’t like it if I make a lot more money than them. My current partner makes more than me and took me to Argentina and Italy within the first few months of us dating. Me being an experienced traveler was a plus to him. I was hoping men wouldn’t mind the difference in income since I didn’t care, but men do care. Get you one with money, ladies.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 11:35 AM
19

I have trouble understanding how oral sex is somehow less intimate than PIV sex. Your face is in their crotch. You’re getting fluids in your mouth. Don’t really get this perspective. But then I also don’t understand wanting to give pleasure but not also receive it.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 11:30 AM
17

Back when I was single I didn’t have the problems I hear some women talk about with dating. I had a really pleasant time and met a lot of great guys. Men were respectful and kind by and large. I did have a couple of men try to neg me many years ago but it was really obvious what they were doing. Blocked their numbers and moved on. I swear most people’s dating problems would be almost nonexistent if people blocked after the first red flag.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 11:25 AM
16

You think it is weird to want to have PIV sex but not weird to go down on a guy on the first date? I’m confused here. Did he give you head first at least?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 11:20 AM
2

Women can pay for a dream guy. But often when women do that the man either a) ends up resenting her for it or b) never liked her that much in the first place, that’s why he wasn’t trying to take care of her financially. Men are socialized to view themselves as protectors and providers - and in the modern age providing IS protecting. I’m not saying this is the right way or the best way I’m saying it IS the way things are. Just like women are socialized to view themselves as responsible for keepin…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 11:06 AM
3

The reason I suspect this dynamic is still fairly rare is that women often value “object of desire affirmation” more than men. It’s one reason sex workers are not going to appeal to women very much. I want sex all the time, but the idea of a man having to make himself have sex with me while he’s disgusted totally turns me off. Men tend to be more ok with knowing the woman isn’t actually attracted to them. Just generally. So I don’t see how a woman who’s plain and average wouldn’t realize that a …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 07:35 AM
13

Oh I wish it weren’t true that men who wanted to go 50/50 didn’t like me much. It just unfortunately is. I’m fine going 50/50. I stopped doing it and met my now partner of 7 years when I realized if I’m his dream girl he’s gonna insist on paying. I know I’m his dream girl. He’s my dream guy because he loves me and treats me like I’m his favorite person ever, not because he bought me dinner. I can buy my own dinner.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 07:21 AM
2

Well he grew up in Europe because he’s an American army brat so he did actually go to Paris and Rome as a teenager. So he couldn’t share a first time experience with me there. You’re really trying hard on this. He wanted to be able to go as an adult and couldn’t. He’d already been to the Vatican and the Louvre, just years ago. Wanna keep trying lol Yeah I figured alcohol was involved with the married woman (who obviously is at fault). I don’t drink and never wanted to be with a man who did. I’m …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 07:09 AM
17

Well, yeah. That’s something humans do for each other they like: they feed them. And men who are interested also want to cook. I know my man loves making me dinner as much as he loves buying me dinner.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 07:01 AM
1

Why are you sleeping with married women? I would never sleep with a married man. Anyway, he talked about how he wished he could travel and see all the art I saw. He’s an artist so his dream would be to go to Italy. He asked if I had been to Paris. I said yes, many times. He was pretty openly unsettled by how much money I have and repeatedly said he couldn’t afford me and how he wanted to stop painting portraits for commission and get a print business going where he could make real money. We had …
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 06:58 AM
2

Nah he was weird about money very specifically. Being able to travel with your friends is a weird thing to say is a red flag. I’m guessing this is some bullshit like “oh she cheats on vacation.” Women can cheat anytime. People who wanna cheat are gonna cheat they don’t need to wait to go on vacation.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 06:24 AM
15

What’s toxic about this? Men who are interested tend to want to pay. Of course you’re following lots of women you’ve matched with. That doesn’t surprise me at all. She’s settling with you and knows you don’t really see a future with her. Would you not want to pay for your dream girl? Of course you would. This woman isn’t you’re dream girl and she probably knows it. I’m not saying it’s fair. I’m not saying it’s right. But gender dynamics haven’t changed over night and a smart woman knows a man wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 05:07 AM
5

Oh women are just as picky about looks for marriage as they are for casual sex. We just also care about many other things too. I think I see what you’re saying. I suppose my different experience with the casual sex market is that all the casual sex partners I’ve had were men I went on regular dates with and realized we weren’t compatible long term, but there was physical attraction. I’ve never gone on a date with the explicit stated purpose of casual sex. Where’s the fun in that?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 03:01 AM
-4

Yes I understand these men have felt I was going to end up with a “better” man. I used to date for vibes and fun in my 20s and didn’t care about the man’s money. I’d go 50/50. In my 30s I realized the men who treated me best were ALWAYS the ones who didn’t let me pay. I just got back with a man I dated for six years. I moved away after breaking up with him. He paid for me to fly to visit him every month for a year. I’m now moving back in with him after we got couple’s counseling for several mont…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 02:14 AM
1

Oh yea women are way pickier about looks, but on the casual sex market people tend to stay in their lane. They just do. I’m aware I could have casual sex with a 20 year old man but we wouldn’t work long term as I’m nearing 40. But that 20 year old would still be about my level of attractiveness. He’d just be younger. Were I 20 we’d be considered in the same league most likely. Young man with middle aged woman is a fantastic sexual pairing. Libidos match in an amazing way. But no, I don’t want to…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 02:00 AM
7

Oh we weren’t close like that. Probably dated for three months tops. Taking a man on vacation is relationship level stuff not just dating stage behavior. I just remember he made a big deal about how I could afford to go on fancy vacations and acted really insecure about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 01:47 AM
6

Casual sex partners aren’t more attractive in my experience. It’s that the only thing they offer is physical attraction. My LTRs have always been with men I was extremely physically attracted to. I don’t know where this myth started that regular women are boning chads. We are getting with other regular men. That’s how the “sexual market place” works. Your link appears to prove orgasms ARE a large component of why certain women (like myself) enjoy causal sex. I always orgasm. Therefore when singl…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 01:12 AM
3

In my experience if a man actually likes me, he wants to invest. I never expected men to give me actual money, but yes, I expect a man to pay for drinks. It doesn’t need to be expensive. Some of the best dates I’ve been on were over a couple cheap beers at a dive bar. It’s about the gesture. When I was young and dumb I wanted to always go 50/50. But as I grew older I realized every single man who treated me the best paid for the first few dates. Later on we can go 50/50. I wish this weren’t true…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 01:03 AM
10

Intimidation might not be the right word, but I have experienced men openly tell me they are uncomfortable that I make so much more money than them. One man many years ago broke up with me because he said he “couldn’t afford” me because I take myself on vacations abroad several times a year. He got all weird about me going to Italy and kept saying “you know I don’t have money.” Yeah. The fact that you’re an artist clued me into that. I didn’t care, but they did.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 12:56 AM
1

Yall are really obsessed with Chad dick. I never think about other women’s pussy because I’m not gay.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/03/25 01:32 PM
3

There is. All over TikTok are accounts devoted to meeting men and how to talk and flirt with them. There have been books about “the art of flirting” since before I was born. Like most self-help books, they were often targeted at women.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/25 08:54 AM
1

Or she is lying because she wants good sex and especially good head. My experience shows me that men give better sex when they are developing feelings for me. Not sure why that isn’t obvious to men.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/25 04:54 AM
4

Men deceive women for money fairly often though. I’ve known a few hobosexuals in my day. My mother used to say “no one falls in love faster than a man who needs a new place to stay.”
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/25 04:53 AM
5

Women can gain a lot from the men not being sure if she’s seeing other men. Think about this logically: if you are starting to really like a woman, you’re gonna give better head, right? As a woman who used to have lots of casual sex, no, many men are not ok with being part of a roster. If you want a guy who treats you well (which means wants to sexually please you and focus on your pleasure) then nah, you can’t be throwing in their face you have a roster. Sex from someone who really likes you hi…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/25 04:46 AM
1

Simone Biles absolutely brings her husband status. So does Beyoncé. I don’t even think jay z views Beyoncé as his dream girl. He just likes the status she brings him. As for Bezos, it’s hard to come close to his money but he went for a famous, age appropriate and also wealthy woman after his divorce. He didn’t go for some young pretty thing. She’s hot, sure. She’s also rich, extremely accomplished and like 55 years old. Edited to add: had to google Allen. So he’s engaged to a famous academy awar…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/25 02:38 AM
0

Pretending women don’t care a lot about looks or that men don’t care about the status of their long term partners is pure cope. You don’t have access to women with status who would elevate your social status, so you don’t think about status. Men with status often like having a woman who elevates his status. The bitch with big tits working at Wendy’s ain’t that, no matter how pretty she is.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/25 01:07 AM
1

Yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/25 09:48 PM
-1

It was true of the men I’ve found attractive enough to go on dates with who told me they hadn’t had a long term relationship before. That’s the only reason it’s a red flag to me. I’ve ended up with too many men with low sex drives to not aggressively screen for it now.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/25 09:15 AM
-1

Sure women are very picky about looks. How a man looks is the number one determinant. Maybe not for asexual women but for sex obviously. Healthy sperm matters.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/25 07:35 AM
2

It’s not about comparison. If all men were at least 6 feet tall they’d all become more attractive. 6’4 is my personal ideal. If all men stopped being fat, they’d all become more attractive too. Not being fat wouldn’t suddenly not matter. As an American I notice in Sweden and Germany I see hot guys ALL the time because they are tall and fit. It doesn’t make them less hot because there are more of them. What an odd thing to say.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/25 07:19 AM
-3

I assume it because when I’ve gone on dates with men who tell me they didn’t have any committed relationships in their 20s I usually ask the following question: “do you consider yourself on the asexual spectrum?” Most of the time they say yes. At first they’ll say they were focused on their career, but when I directly ask them, most have said yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/25 06:14 AM
-4

I assume they don’t have much of a sex drive if they’ve never managed to get a girlfriend by their late 20s. That makes them incompatible with me.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/25 05:47 AM
1

So this wasn’t written by a tall and athletic guy obviously. Men under 40 who are tall, lean and are not bald are considered attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/25 05:33 AM
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