SpecialistCandy Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
284	Exercise your confidence	Fundamentals	SpecialistCandy	/r/seduction	05/05/21 09:06 AM

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
1	When a woman says she didn't feel a connection or a "spark", is that something that is purely a matter of natural chemistry, or is it a sign that there wasn't enough escalation. Yeah, it’s not easy. Mixed messages like that could be interpreted differently. Some would say it’s shit tests and games. I think it’s more about mood changes. Both women and men sometimes feel horny and seek sexual escalation, but sometimes they just want to have a good date without an immediate escalation. Women are a lot less confrontational, so they’ll rarely let you know when you’re doing something wrong, so it’s important to learn to read their mood too.	/r/seduction	05/07/21 07:04 AM
17	When a woman says she didn't feel a connection or a "spark", is that something that is purely a matter of natural chemistry, or is it a sign that there wasn't enough escalation. Yeah, it’s not easy. Mixed messages like that could be interpreted differently. Some would say it’s shit tests and games. I think it’s more about mood changes. Both women and men sometimes feel horny and seek sexual escalation, but sometimes they just want to have a good date without an immediate escalation. Women are a lot less confrontational, so they’ll rarely let you know when you’re doing something wrong, so it’s important to learn to read their mood.	/r/seduction	05/07/21 07:04 AM
54	When a woman says she didn't feel a connection or a "spark", is that something that is purely a matter of natural chemistry, or is it a sign that there wasn't enough escalation. As others said, it’s just a polite way to tell you that she’s not that into you. It could be because of over escalating. Happened to me one time. I completely misread the situation. I tried following the “fast escalation” principle and I thought it was going well. Later I got a “no spark” text. After an honest conversation with the girl she basically said that she found my behaviour inappropriate and pushy, but would not confront me because she didn’t know how I would react and it was a safety c…	/r/seduction	05/07/21 06:38 AM
2	If this is true, what is the use? We're on the same page here man. It just annoys me that these guys have this mentality: "I did this and that with my life, now women must love me! Oh they don't? Well fuck them this is hopeless they all want that one thing I lack (insert whatever complex the poster has about themselves)! I will be forever alone and sad." I'm in the same age group as you and that guy (also untreated ADD throughout my youth) and my life isn't nearly as put together as his, yet I genuinely love my life and women se…	/r/seduction	07/05/21 11:21 AM
1	Exercise your confidence Being nice is great! Be unapologetic about it and expect nothing back. Do nice things because it feels good, not to improve your social standing. Obviously don’t set yourself on fire to keep others warm, but don’t be ashamed of being nice either.	/r/seduction	06/05/21 05:44 AM
1	Exercise your confidence Don’t give up. And stop caring about what you think women care about. I know it sound cliche, but women are much more complex in their decision making process than men. I met some really ugly guys dating absolute bombshells. At some point I too was hitting that wall - I tried so hard, but nothing seemed to work. And I gave up. I decided to stop chasing women. I fully accepted that I may be single for the rest of my life and just decided to make the most of it. I stopped giving a fuck about women…	/r/seduction	06/05/21 05:31 AM
2	Exercise your confidence Well said. The whole seduction movement evolved out of this cringe PUA ideas from early 2000. Take the books commonly recommended on here: Reading The Mystery Method gave me the creeps. Reading Models made me realise that whatever changes I needed to make start from within. I joined this sub years ago after a rough divorce to get laid more, but it gave me so much more than that! My life genuinely changed for the better in every measurable way.	/r/seduction	06/05/21 05:12 AM
5	Exercise your confidence I hear you. I just used it as an example of a free activity people can do to realise that they don't need nice things to feel good about themselves. Having nice things is gratifying and, therefore, gives you a confidence boost of achievement, but it is not the right mindset. This is mostly in response to these needy "woe me" posts on here and askseddit like "I'm not tall/fit/rich/handsome so no matter what I do girls don't like me."	/r/seduction	05/05/21 02:51 PM
17	Exercise your confidence Read before commenting. I never said it does. I said it could but it shouldn’t. Confidence comes from within. That was the whole point of the post - not to rely on other things as crutches for your confidence. You missed the point and contributed nothing of substance. Well done.	/r/seduction	05/05/21 11:40 AM
6	Newly single and low N-count but already heading down the path. Does she sleep with the guy she's been on 7 dates with and spends all day with or the rando she just met and will never see again? I don't know why this is being downvoted. She's trash, yes, but she doesn't owe him anything. If he wanted to be exclusive he should ask. If he wants sex he should make a move. He didn't establish the rules early on and now being strung along like a sucker. I'm a bit old school - I believe that not fucking around while going on regular dates with someone (don't confuse with dating) is just a decent thing to do. Communication and honesty is key. I usually told my dates straight up that if they're…	/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen	05/05/21 11:04 AM
6	If this is true, what is the use? The flaw in his argument is that he claims all women want what he claims they want. That’s a wild generalisation. It just happened to be that all women he pursued were like that. And really they have a right to be. They don’t owe you anything no matter how much hard work you put into yourself. The way he described his life, it looks like he’s probably in his late 30s or 40s. Social expectation at this age is to have your life together and even succeed in some areas. Looks? That’s easy. Ask yours…	/r/seduction	05/05/21 07:52 AM
11	He's perfect for me! But he doesn't tip the counter staff $1 on a $2 coffee and it's ruining my tingles Who the fuck wants a 1$ or 50c tip? I did my share of hospitality jobs and tiny tips like that are just a pain to reconcile at the end of the shift. Especially if it’s my local coffee shop. I get a coffee there almost every day and they know me. I put a $20 in their tip jar once a month or so when I get my pay check. I believe most locals who go there do the same and it’s a better system than circulating coins.	/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen	06/12/20 05:52 AM
1	A Simple, but effective Test Haha my entire wardrobe is black basic tshirts. It is just a flattering look for me. This is a very good post and an aha moment. No need to peacock if you already got it.	/r/seduction	29/10/20 10:55 AM
4	Men - how do you like to be flirted with? Depends on your target audience. If it’s guys in their 20s you’re after, feel free to take charge and go full Stifler’s mom on them. Let them live their MILF fantasies. This might be too aggressive for older guys in their late 30s or 40s though, so dial it down, but be direct. Massaging guys ego with compliments works wonders. I (35m) personally like push/pull type of flirting. Like call me handsome out of nowhere then immediately change the subject to weather or something. Most guys enjoy a lit…	/r/seduction	09/10/20 05:17 AM
9	𝐁𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐈𝐬 𝐀𝐥𝐥 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐍𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐓𝐨 𝐆𝐞𝐭 𝐋𝐚𝐢𝐝 That’s what I meant. People hear “be yourself”, go out, fail and come back here crying. Improve, be the best version of yourself.	/r/seduction	11/09/20 02:23 AM
15	𝐁𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐈𝐬 𝐀𝐥𝐥 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐍𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐓𝐨 𝐆𝐞𝐭 𝐋𝐚𝐢𝐝 All of the above is true if you’re also happen to be good looking. Be yourself is a bad advice for someone with busted teeth and a pot belly.	/r/seduction	10/09/20 09:10 PM
5	Wisest thing I've ever heard Exactly. Catching and baiting to me implies some kind of deceptive behaviour. It might be a valid strategy to get laid, but ultimately it’s the wrong mentality.	/r/seduction	05/05/20 08:46 AM
7	Is it true that 9s and 10s are typically “lonely?” Judging by the looks alone yes, you are right - there are a lot of crazy hot women dating average or below average looking men. But that just means men have more ways to be attractive. Financial security, emotional security, creative talents, intelligence, being funny, power/social influence, physical strength etc are all attractive traits to women, so even an ugly guy can be a 9 or a 10. That also opens up opportunities for average looking guys to pursue women “out of their league”, because the…	/r/seduction	03/01/20 09:39 AM
19	Is it true that 9s and 10s are typically “lonely?” That statement is an oversimplification. Real 10s (both men and women) are extremely rare. Being a ten doesn’t only mean being physically attractive, but also accomplished, smart and with a sense of self worth. This means having higher standards for the opposite sex by definition. Cultural norms allow men to go “below” their level, but for women it is still considered inappropriate. For example a rockstar or a male athlete can easily hook up with a groupie and no one would bat an eyelid, but a f…	/r/seduction	03/01/20 12:57 AM
1	Need advice on ex who recently reached out Just don’t bring up the break up at all, act like you’re completely over her, even if you’re not. Talk about the present and what positive things happened to you since you last spoke. Don’t ask if she is or was seeing someone. That’s irrelevant. If she brings up your past relationship (that’s an indication of interest you’re looking for, btw), just say something about the good times you had and turn the conversation sexual.	/r/seduction	26/12/19 04:45 PM
2	Need advice on ex who recently reached out Do you really care? Meet up, smash for old times sake, move on. Treat it like a casual encounter or FWB.	/r/seduction	26/12/19 04:30 PM
3	My questions about Tinder Game No, it’s fine, but be clever about it. Depends on the girl/location. You see these “I want you to sit on my face” screen grabs a lot, but I think it’s because it so rarely works. I usually keep it light and try to move conversation off tinder as soon as possible (5-6 messages). Use text/whatever messenger to schedule a date and go from there. You say “we should meet/get drinks/go out” she says yes A ton of canned openers on r/tinder. Something less generic and more thoughtful like a comment on h…	/r/seduction	01/01/19 04:13 PM
2	Why do I miss so many girls? Sounds like you’ve got a busy life already! Don’t forget to look after yourself too. Spend your extra money on yourself. Looking good boosts your confidence and, in turn, attractiveness. And definitely date someone new. Just for the fun of it. There are millions of women out there. For sure at least one of them will take your mind of your exes.	/r/seduction	29/12/18 02:46 PM
3	Why do I miss so many girls? Do something to take your mind off them. Try reducing contact a bit. If they are friends treat them as friends. Travel - change of scene works well. Obsess over some new hobby instead. But really try to meet someone new.	/r/seduction	29/12/18 01:40 PM
1	How to circumvent “traditional upbringing” in game Yeah, that’s some big red flag right there. Probably an STD or something.	/r/seduction	29/12/18 01:35 PM
1	How to circumvent “traditional upbringing” in game Eat her pussy. If you’re good at it all traditional values go out the window.	/r/seduction	29/12/18 12:48 PM
6	Why do I miss so many girls? Try to think about why you miss them. Do you want them back? Are you comparing them to the girls you’re seeing currently? In any case, delete them from your life and move on. Block them on social media, delete photos, phone contacts, messages, everything. Do it all in one go, sort of like a wake or a funeral. Then go out and meet someone new.	/r/seduction	29/12/18 12:38 PM
1	Woman might be going cold, need advice on how to proceed. Oh yes! I get that feeling every time a 9/10 tells me she’s not feeling it. I want to run after her and tell her how awesome my life is and how I am ready to share it with her. But the right thing to do it s to let her go out on a couple of dates with douchebags and let her come up with the decision that you’re better on her own. For sure there will be people in this sub telling you that you can alpha out of it and force attraction, but in my experience you can’t really do that to a girl you rea…	/r/seduction	28/12/18 09:59 PM
1	Woman might be going cold, need advice on how to proceed. Not a PUA, but actually going through a similar story right now. I guess you know it already, but just need to hear it from someone: she's not not interested, but also not interested enough. From what you wrote, you seem like an awesome guy with a good life. She likes that, but there is not enough attraction to you personally. Women are fickle. One day they want to be a part of your exciting life, the next some hotter/richer/smarter guy hits on her and she thinks she can do better.. So the best …	/r/seduction	28/12/18 03:28 PM
8	Is Tinder Gold worth it? It isn’t worth it to subscribe to Tinder Gold just to see who likes you. Most likely you won’t like them back. But it can be useful because you get a free boost and some super likes with it. Here’s the strategy: buy a one month subscription to gold (don’t forget to cancel it after), boost yourself and get swiping. Don’t swipe on everyone. Use super likes and buy more if required. The most important thing: time it to when the girls are actually on Tinder. Sunday or Monday late evening works quite…	/r/seduction	26/12/18 08:26 AM
1	how to game shy/introverted girls? Ok, I’ll bite. What I meant is shy girls are a handful. Even in a successful relationship, they rarely come out of the shell and still have tons of issues. Sex is uninspiring and, we’ll, shy. It gets boring quickly. OP should ask himself why does he like shy girls? Could it be the lack of confidence to pursue more outgoing and confident women? Isn’t this sub all about changing ones perspective and opening to new possibilities? Source: dated multiple shy girls.	/r/seduction	25/12/18 05:33 PM
2	I teach guys this stuff. What is your greatest challenge in seduction and dating right now? Ok, two challenges: 1. I get numbers easily, but there are a lot of flakes, so setting up dates is difficult. I just move on to the next one and at this point have about 25 girls texting me on and off. This is hard work! Is that too many? Any tips on maintaining interest with many girls without coming off as needy? Age gap. I’m 33, but look a lot younger. My target age group is 22-27. So approaching isn’t a problem, but when the age topic inevitably comes up, I get a bit insecure that a girl wil…	/r/seduction	25/12/18 10:07 AM
3	Want-y instead of need-y... Abundance instead of scarcity. How to express needs without seeming needy/controlling? Not a seduction expert, but I was in almost the same situation as you (no kid with my ex, luckily). Advice: dial it waaaay down. Don’t get too serious right away. Have fun with dating, you can let a girl know you want something serious, but avoid serious relationship topics if you can. Inevitably, if the girl is into you and wants a serious relationship, she will initiate this conversation. Trust me, I usually get “how are you single?” or “what do you want out of this relationship?” question aro…	/r/seduction	25/12/18 09:54 AM
-8	how to game shy/introverted girls? Honestly, shy girls are not worth the effort. Do you think once you’re in they are going to turn into wild pornstars all of a sudden? No, there are usually layers upon layers of repressed issues with shy girls. Move on.	/r/seduction	25/12/18 08:26 AM
3	Finding it difficult to get back in zone in a new country Hey, I was in exactly the same situation: moved to Europe for work three months ago. It’s not easy, as you lose your social proof, but it has its advantages! Firstly, you’re a foreigner! It’s a big turn on for some girls, especially in places not too diverse.. like not major cities. Just make sure you let her know you are here long term.. no one likes a tourist looking for a hook up. Secondly, immediately start learning local language. Saying anything to a girl in her language is a fantastic ope…	/r/seduction	24/12/18 07:06 PM
1	A message for guys who think they have "nothing to offer" women What about a situation where you turn a woman off by being “too cool”? I do this a lot on dates: tell funny stories from my travels.. This is what I am, an adventurous guy with an exciting life. But sometimes I get responses like “oh, my life is too boring compared to yours..” and then awkward silence.. Trying to salvage it doesn’t always work, especially with not-so-hot girls. How do I bounce back from overdoing being funny and exciting?	/r/seduction	24/12/18 11:02 AM