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SubGothius Archive

View 0 posts and 63 comments by SubGothius on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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6

I had a similar realization, something many guys and gals alike ought to realize: When you express amorous interest in someone, and they rebuff you, it's merely an expression of their disinterest as clear as your own expression of interest. Be glad you learned that truth so clearly, stop spending any more time and effort trying to "win over" that particular person, and go meet and mingle with other people until you find one who's actually interested. Though it may sting to learn that truth, it's…
/r/MensRights28/01/14 09:31 AM
8

Guys thinking they can "save" a gal from the assholes she tends to date are just as misguided as gals thinking they can "save" those assholes from their churlish ways; both cases involve a person assuming responsibility for fixing someone else's issues by trying to change them, which is a canonical example of a boundary transgression -- namely, the boundary between you and your own business vs. others and their own business.
/r/MensRights28/01/14 08:32 AM
8

...women tend to approach too submissively, grasping at the knuckles, and going all dead fish. It's not their fault, nobody teaches women how to properly shake a hand. Part of this is because men really only have one acceptable type of handshake, whereas women have two: the standard "business shake" (or "manshake"), and the dainty ladylike shake -- the latter being where she simply drapes her fingers over yours. The trick is in calibrating to whichever type of shake she offers; if you give a man…
/r/seduction18/06/12 10:17 PM
3

Aside from the obvious social networking advantage (every friend you have is a potential connection to meet other people they know), I remember reading something ages ago about "the vouch" -- i.e., being seen in the company of women implicitly vouches for your character, qualifies you, makes you seem interesting and acceptable, and may even confer a favorable grapevine reputation.
/r/seduction10/06/12 11:11 AM
1

It's as simple as the Golden Rule; give what you wish to receive. Don't seek approval, acceptance and respect; give approval to get approval, give acceptance to get acceptance, give respect to get respect. You've got to ante up to be dealt in.
/r/seduction29/03/12 09:12 AM
1

Touch her arm first, then her back, then waist, then hands, then mouth (kissing), then face/neck.
/r/seduction16/01/12 04:13 AM
22

TL;DR: Q: How many /r/SRS'ers does it take to change a light bulb? A: THAT'S NOT FUNNY. ಠ_ಠ
/r/seduction09/01/12 09:57 PM
1

I haven't been clinically diagnosed because I don't see any value in validating the staggeringly obvious about myself, so I probably wouldn't be of much use to this study, but it may still be useful for Aspies to discuss right here in Seddit what methods or approaches will and won't work for us -- not just for Aspies, but also of probable benefit to other guys because (as Cambridge psych prof. and autism specialist Simon Baron-Cohen has written), the autistoid brain is an extreme version of the …
/r/seduction04/01/12 09:02 PM
3

Also, once you're already conversing comfortably, if you need a refill when she's at or near the end of her drink as well, you can excuse yourself from the table saying, "I'm getting another drink; can I get you anything?" This is an organic and natural development borne of the social situation itself, reduces complexity and duplicate action (if you'll both need a drink, there's no sense in each of you holding down the table alone while the other gets their own drink, when one person can get bot…
/r/seduction08/11/11 10:48 PM
2

Exactly. :D
/r/seduction03/08/11 10:14 AM
2

For tequila shots, "Na zdrowie!"
/r/seduction03/08/11 03:07 AM
2

The "How do I get this girl?" posts are simple cases of Oneitis. The difference between that vs. finding someone with whom you can imagine spending the rest of your life (or at least the foreseeable future) is a matter of when you conclude she may be "the one" -- before you've even met, dated or established an ongoing relationship with her (Oneitis), or realizing only after all that's already transpired with a gal that, "Holy cow, this is actually working out, and I want things to keep working t…
/r/seduction23/07/11 10:34 PM
6

More specifically in terms of seduction, Oneitis is concerned with "How to win over this one particular woman," rather than, "How to meet and attract more women." Someone with a case of Oneitis hopes seduction will give him a sort of "magic love spell" that can be applied towards a specific gal he already has in mind, in order to "make" her fall for him, rather than a set of self-improvements that more generally improve his odds of successfully meeting more women and, yes, having more of them mo…
/r/seduction20/07/11 08:30 AM
4

It's interesting that most gals who get impatient, as you say, would rather "settle" for a pushy douchebag than "settle" for a good guy who only needed a clear indication of interest. If gals made a move more often, they'd more often wind up with the nice guys they say they want. As Dan Savage recently put it: Okay, PSGWAC, a lot of guys—fine and otherwise—have been led to believe that hitting on girls who aren't in bars or on personals websites is tantamount to sexual harassment. Because, you s…
/r/seduction16/03/11 09:48 AM
1

In addition to the other comments here, I suspect many women may not realize there's a difference between affective empathy and cognitive empathy, and that it's possible (perhaps even probable) for guys to have one in spades without the other. That is, if she encounters a guy who seems in sync with what she's thinking and feeling, what her attitude towards him is, and he responds appropriately to her expectations, then she may interpret that as the guy being interested in her and caring about he…
/r/seduction16/03/11 02:24 AM
1

Imagine her either stripping for you, or fingering herself to orgasm later while thinking about you inspired by that very encounter, like you know it's gonna be one of those scenarios or the other; either of these should put a soft, sly, sexy smile on your face, and some motivation to make sure it'll be the former scenario rather than the latter.
/r/seduction15/03/11 11:11 PM
1

If you have to break eye contact or she breaks it: Looking down is submissive (an encouraging sign if she does it, an unfavorable sign if you do it); Looking up is dismissive (related to eye-rolling); Looking aside is coy or distracted: "Maybe you'll do, or maybe someone over there, so step it up and prove yourself".
/r/seduction15/03/11 11:07 PM
3

If she comes over and asks you to buy her a drink right away, you could raise your eyebrows in impressed surprise at her nerve, then pull a Feynman and ask her, "Why, are you sleeping with me tonight?" (or more NLPish, "What, just because you're sleeping with me tonight?") If she can just come right out and ask for what she wants, why can't you? Of course anything she says is tentative, and she can always change her mind, but if she said "yes" to get the drink, she's put herself in the spot of r…
/r/seduction15/03/11 10:52 PM
7

Be gracious and modest; an "aw shucks, ma'am" attitude works. Return compliments if/as warranted; if I deem that the compliment may apply just as well to the person giving it, I like turning a schoolyard riposte on its head, responding to compliments with a playful, "Takes one to know one" and sometimes a sly, quick and subtle, conspiratorial wink.
/r/seduction19/02/11 08:22 AM
1

Hey, I think I just found the comment where I originally found out about the simplified stages of physical intimacy progression, thanks to this inspiring post, just posting this belated reply to tip you off about it.
/r/seduction06/01/11 05:38 AM
6

Amazingly, you just made sense of something I'd regarded as one of the most disturbing things about Twilight -- that Edward is so compellingly attracted to Bella primarily because he cannot read her mind, as he can with everyone else. This really bugged me because it seemed to be conveying the message to fans that, in order to attract a protective male lifemate and keep him interested and committed, they must become a total cipher: an utterly inscrutable mystery with no distinguishing features w…
/r/seduction04/01/11 11:24 PM
4

Also agreed that the VDKEL material, at least as-presented, seems a bit unnecessarily complex and vague; my mind starts swimming trying to contend with too many social variables at once, and that just locks me up, so it's counterproductive for me. Ages ago, I'd seen it boiled down to a set of milestones you reach in this order: Eye contact Verbal contact Upper Arm Waist/hip or Lower Back Lower Back or Waist/hip Lips/Kissing Face Neck Breasts Crotch The basic idea is that you go through the progr…
/r/seduction26/12/10 11:44 PM
1

Haha, I'm picturing a scenario like the Monty Python Hungarian phrasebook sketch.
/r/seduction22/12/10 07:07 AM
1

Rather than just paying for everything or fussing over splitting each bill, I make a sort of tit-for-tat game about who "gets to" treat the other at each venue or round. Don't start at a sit-down restaurant where the server takes your order at your table; go for a cafe, fast-casual eatery or bar, where you order and pay at a counter upfront. Pick up the first tab yourself by going in front and ordering first, then turning to ask her what she wants, and pay for both as if there was no question in…
/r/seduction16/11/10 01:50 AM
2

That reminds me: One thing about local cons and cosplays is that they are somewhat public events/locations, and thus they feel "safer" for gals to get into, vs. going over to some guy's house for social gaming with other, unfamiliar gamer guys of unknown social graces. If your gaming scene is largely among friends at their homes, you've prolly met all the gals in that circle you're gonna meet, and new arrivals will be few and far between (and likely someone else's actual or aspirational GF). See…
/r/seduction16/11/10 12:51 AM
2

The ladies seem to like the Bay Rum I wear, which is basically just oil of Bay leaves and diluted alcohol. It's some seriously olde-skoole manly mojo, the kind of aftershave your great-grandfather (and his great-grandfather before him) might have worn. That connection to generations of men past, and the unfussy simplicity and unpretentious honesty of it, positively affects how I feel about myself as much as the aroma appeals to women. I don't even buy any pre-made stuff, just got a little bottle…
/r/seduction12/11/10 05:14 AM
2

That's a bit unnecessarily complex, IMO; my mind starts swimming trying to contend with too many variables at once, and that just locks me up. I've seen it boiled down to this order of progression: Eye contact Verbal contact Upper Arm Waist/hip or Lower Back Lower Back or Waist/hip Lips/Kissing Face Neck Breasts Crotch The basic idea is that you go through the progression one step at a time; if she doesn't object, shrug you off or move away, you're clear to proceed to the next step. There's some…
/r/seduction20/10/10 10:49 PM
2

Lies!
/r/seduction13/10/10 02:03 AM
1

You could turn it around and put the onus of starting an interesting conversation on them: "What's the matter, cat got your tongue?"
/r/seduction07/10/10 02:31 AM
2

Indeed; just work on developing a social circle, and that alone will DHV and lead to introductions. You having a good time amongst a co-ed group of friends will be more attractive than you alone, bored and lonely.
/r/seduction30/08/10 05:49 AM
0

Many colleges will let you "audit" courses -- i.e., sit in and participate without course credit for free or a nominal fee. This is often done with intro-level art and other creative types of classes in particular.
/r/seduction30/08/10 05:44 AM
1

I think you may still get benefit of the effect naturally, especially if you wear highly saturated, complementary colors that would enhance your hair color by contrast, such as emerald green (better for deeper reds) or sapphire blue (better for more orangey reds). Sure, some gals just don't go for gingers in general, but fuck'em, they're already a lost cause anyway; you want the ones that adore redheads to really notice you and find you as compelling as possible, and to leverage the "seeing red"…
/r/seduction26/08/10 12:53 AM
2

Has it occurred to you that perhaps these women don't even respect themselves and are simply disqualifying themselves as prospects for what you want? One seems to like the push-pull drama, the fight-neglect-makeup cycle; another seems to use her man as a social connection, a mere means to her own social ends; another seems to use her man for transportation convenience (and possibly drugs, from the sound of him). A lot of apparent "failures" are actually just discovering that you and the person y…
/r/seduction11/08/10 01:18 AM
2

Yup, all mine. :)
/r/seduction15/07/10 09:28 PM
18

It just means she's feeling a bit overwhelmed at the moment, not sure if she's being carried away by her emotions/hormones or wants to get carried away quite yet. It may have been a while for her, which is why she dove in with such gusto, carpe diem and all, but now she's realizing this could become more than just a fling, or isn't sure whether she wants a fling or an actual boyfriend, and doesn't want it to burn out from "too much too fast too soon". It's up to you to decide if you think she's …
/r/seduction15/07/10 09:24 AM
3

If she goes and talks to guys she already starts to come of as different and weird. ...as if that's a bad thing? Pickup pretty much exists because gals don't approach guys at all, ever, no matter how much they fancy a guy, and guys are generally oblivious to pretty much every "hint" gals think they're sending to indicate that they want to be approached. If anyone would judge you harshly for making an approach, that instantly reveals they're an asshole, so you don't have to waste any further time…
/r/seduction28/04/10 10:30 PM
2

Actually, people do form emotional bonds by sharing meals together; this is why the military has traditionally operated mess halls/tents with common dining areas wherever possible rather than just having chuckwagons or commissaries distributing food, and this was a key point of "embedding" reporters with units serving in Iraq, the idea being that they'd bond with the troops over shared meals and mutual threats and thus produce more favorable reportage. (Pardon the politics, but it's the example …
/r/seduction28/04/10 04:13 AM
6

Too late; television already started us down that slippery slope long, long ago.
/r/seduction28/04/10 04:02 AM
21

This underscores something I've long suspected about most pickup lessons, that they primarily work due to a sort of "placebo effect" where the specific lesson content or method don't really matter much, as long as it psychs a guy into simply making any approaches at all. Simply having a plan, any plan, that you can put into action beats having no plan and taking no action because you don't know what to do.
/r/seduction26/03/10 06:03 AM
4

I.e., if she's doing that with her boyfriend now, what will she do when you're her boyfriend, more of the same?
/r/seduction17/03/10 01:37 AM
1

The list only concerns your kino towards her (what you touch on her body in what order), and the only feedback you need to consider is whether she leaves or stays. However, at any point she could of course preempt the progression and dispense with further formalities by pulling you in for a kiss or grabbing your ass or crotch, so you're pretty much "in" by that point. Taking your actual question, if you've only had eye and verbal contact and she touches your face, I don't think you could go wron…
/r/seduction15/03/10 11:03 AM
9

This simple progression of acceptable contact was an invaluable revelation I picked up somewhere here on Reddit, no idea where it came from originally, but it seems to follow a natural model, just describing what actually happens when there's a natural rapport and comfort level developing. The only feedback you need to consider here is whether she leaves or stays. Just take one step at a time, and if she doesn't leave, then proceed to the next step, etc. but if she does leave after attempting an…
/r/seduction15/03/10 03:35 AM
1

Thanks, but I can't take credit for it; just passing along the info and couldn't find the original-flavor sauce.
/r/seduction01/03/10 01:04 AM
10

One-itis is not relevant to your situation; it has nothing to do with having already found someone interesting, compatible, and lovable enough that she leaves you uninterested in pursuing anyone else and more interested in pursuing deeper, longer-term interests with her. There's a difference between realizing you've found The One without looking for her, vs. looking everywhere for The One without finding her. One-itis refers to an attitude we can tend to adopt before meeting anybody at all. Once…
/r/seduction28/02/10 03:12 AM
9

If she likes you you'll know... Sorry pal, maybe you would know, but a lot of us are so oblivious to nonverbal signaling that not only do we get it wrong, we more often don't even notice there's any signal there to "get". Just because you're a Natural doesn't mean this isn't all rocket surgery to some of the rest of us. I totally get where the OP is coming from. However, I also get your point that there are no clear rules, no IOI "code" to decipher. The exact, same behavior could mean completely…
/r/seduction27/02/10 09:50 PM
1

Hm, looks like the tear ducts drain into the nasal cavity, so tears could drain to the back of the throat from there.
/r/seduction31/01/10 07:33 AM
2

Doesn't make much sense considering that when you put drops in your eyes, most of it drains via the tear ducts into the throat where it gets swallowed.
/r/seduction31/01/10 03:56 AM
4

I.e. (for the most part), what women say they want and what they actually go for often bear no resemblance whatsoever to each other. Even if asked after the fact why they did or didn't go for that guy, what they say will be more a rationalization of their instinct-level decision rather than a guiding reason.
/r/seduction02/12/09 04:43 AM
2

Sounds like game is only relevant for not blowing any chance you already have, but it can't create a chance if she hadn't already granted it within her 20-second first-impression evaluation.
/r/seduction01/12/09 10:55 PM
12

In many cases, the only difference between admiring and harassing is that the girl likes the guy or not. ...and unfortunately, many gals don't realize they need to be a LOT more blunt and matter-of-fact to guys about indicating their interest or lack thereof. Gals who expect guys should "just be able to tell" whether they're interested without them having to say so... well, that's just unrealistic. Men are (still) expected to approach Women first; It is never acceptable for Men to approach Women…
/r/MensRights17/06/09 11:51 PM
3

Perhaps more to the point, distribution is the key problem to "feeding the world's hungry", rather than mere production. Much of the world's hungry are kept so by their local warlords/dictators/etc. who hijack and hoard all the food aid that comes in, both as a means to wield/secure their power and as something they can sell to get more guns/jeeps/etc.
/r/MensRights17/06/09 11:39 PM
1

This! Hell, someone needs to open a Sadie Hawkins Bar or two or several... dozen, scattered in cities across the country. C'mon, this has to be a sound Business Plan.
/r/MensRights04/06/09 08:54 AM
2

It's one of the oldest men's magazines around; Hugh Hefner worked for Esquire before quitting to establish Playboy. BTW, the word esquire itself is interesting; originally derived from the position of squire to a knight, I understand it eventually came to indicate a man who had secured social standing as a Gentleman or better by word, deed and accomplishment, rather than by Noble birth alone. More recently however, American lawyers have adopted it as a title so commonly that many in the USA woul…
/r/MensRights23/04/09 11:38 PM
5

The "Men" section is the entire rest of the magazine.
/r/MensRights23/04/09 06:15 AM
-2

I, for one, welcome our new assertive and sexually-ravenous overladies.
/r/MensRights04/03/09 12:16 AM
-4

I see what he did there.
/r/MensRights02/11/08 08:33 AM
2

Turnabout is not only not fair play, it stoops to the "other" side's lowest level and gains nothing in the interest of either Men's rights or true Egalitarianism. There is nothing to be gained by racing to see who can crash into the gutter soonest and hardest. Of course, taking up sides against each other is no solution either, as I have argued before. Woman-bashing is neither the best solution nor the most appropriate response to man-bashing. It's another matter, however, where a case of a woma…
/r/MensRights17/09/08 02:12 AM
1

Since I reference-linked a current comment to my comment above, I feel obliged to address your reply belatedly: The duality is not arbitrary. There are undeniable differences between male[s] v. female[s]... It was not the basis of the duality itself that I meant to identify as arbitrary; it was the choice of that particular duality as having any relevance or importance to most situations where it is applied that I found arbitrary. Yes, men and women have anatomic and, in terms of broad populatio…
/r/MensRights17/09/08 01:59 AM
3

How many Hegelians does it take to change a lightbulb? At least two: one to shout "Light!" from one corner of the room, the other to shout "Dark!" from the opposing corner, and as many extras needed to join in the shouting on each side until it eventually results in the spontaneous synthesis of a new bulb appearing in the socket. Now, how many Hegelian gender-activists does it take to accomplish egalitarian gender neutrality? ;D
/r/MensRights21/08/08 10:28 PM
8

In terms of achieving a goal of Egalitarianism, Men's Rights groups are as foolish and ineffective as Women's Rights groups, when considered as means towards that particular goal. One cannot claim to represent one side of an arbitrary duality, and simultanously claim to represent the best interests of both sides, let alone of dispelling the dichotomy itself entirely. The true adversary is the division and imbalance itself, not whatever side of the division you don't happen to find yourself on, n…
/r/MensRights21/08/08 08:40 PM
3

Her attorney, Jeff Tronvold, said she underwent a surgical procedure and is now symptom free but there are no guarantees it won't return and she will remain a carrier. No, no, NO. How do lawyers get away with making grossly outdated medical proclamations left unsubstantiated nor unchalleneged by an actual MD? HPV isn't "the gift that keeps on giving" like we used to think, oh, a couple decades ago. If you get treated (e.g., warts burned/frozen off) and they don't come back within a year (or even…
/r/MensRights19/08/08 10:28 PM
1

I think what the article describes is actually called "emasculation"; if it were "merely" castration, he'd at least have kept his dick.
/r/MensRights18/08/08 04:47 AM
2

What's unnerving about reading this is that it reminds me of a friend who was eventually Dx'd with Borderline Personality Disorder herself, but before that point, she'd often described her own mother and upbringing in similar terms (e.g. "Mommy Hitler") to what the author describes here. I gather one manifestation of BPD is the tendency to lionize or demonize people; everyone they know is regarded as either an absolute Angel who can do no wrong or an utter Devil who can do no right, often for tr…
/r/MensRights10/07/08 01:26 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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