Sunny-Bubbles Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
4	FDS For the Really Late (And Self Doubting) Bloomer? Also, the more you enforce boundaries in other ways as well, the more guys will respect them. (Being a person who consistently keeps boundaries is HV. It's like how bad boundaries = trash bait, but inverse.)	/r/FemaleDatingStrategy	29/02/20 10:18 AM
3	I want to get sterilized. Advice? For what it's worth, I absolutely took for granted that I didn't want children from when I can remember up until my late 20s. I've heard from other people this is common. I've heard people really upset they did this procedure and then change their mind (can be heartbreaking). But definitely I really thought I didn't want children for like 20+ years, before I changed my mind. Also, for whatever it's worth, the Mating Matters podcast claims that the brain stops developing at age 25 (hence marriage…	/r/FemaleDatingStrategy	23/02/20 03:31 PM
8	How do I proceed in order to establish my power? Yeah, he can't blame you for reading him as anything but indifferent. Trust your instincts. Your man gotta bring you the whole cracker factory. It also might be worth looking at the FDS handbook again. Having sex with someone in two months and not knowing where you stand is both anxiety-inducing and counter-productive if you want a real relationship. Put you first and maintain your boundaries. 🌸	/r/FemaleDatingStrategy	21/02/20 12:55 PM
26	How do I proceed in order to establish my power? Sis. It's crackers. Even if he did want to date you properly, he's shown that he's not good enough at communicating with you for you to feel safe. You barely know this guy. You've been seeing him for 2 months. You have no obligation to him. and you especially don't owe him your pretending he's a HVM so that his feelings don't get hurt. It shouldn't hurt his feelings for you to assert your personal boundaries! And if it does, that's creepy. Do you really want to be with a guy who can't handle his…	/r/FemaleDatingStrategy	21/02/20 12:15 PM
2	How Did YOU discover FDS, and what convinced you to follow its principles? Love this comment ❤️	/r/FemaleDatingStrategy	21/02/20 02:47 AM
2	How Did YOU discover FDS, and what convinced you to follow its principles? For most of my life, I was NoT LiKe tHe oThEr GirLS: tomboy kid, then gradually picked up some pretty heavy internalised misogyny (in denial, except for explicitly joking about it 😒), discovered PUA and thought they had understood females better than me (kinda self-gaslighted), became a mega pickmeisha, anti marriage, no female friends, felt uncomfortable around women and femininity and female values. This made me miserable. At one point I cracked and could not tolerate being used anymore. In on…	/r/FemaleDatingStrategy	21/02/20 02:40 AM
1	Advice for any immigrants when dating a local [I realise you wrote this post more for other immigrants and it's not such a live problem for you, but I wanted to share my live reaction to the story.] Are you kidding me? Germans have been the most romantic people I've dated. (Totally true they're more egocentric though.) They get super intense about women they're into. Don't let them off the hook! But EVEN IF it were 'culture differences'– is that kind of behaviour ok to YOU? It doesn't matter if some behaviour comes from culture or from his …	/r/FemaleDatingStrategy	21/02/20 01:27 AM
3	I detached myself and stayed passive. It did more harm. Well done for realising how he was hurting you and committing to working on your boundaries. That line about him neglecting to tell you because he wanted to avoid conflict is really bad–he was stringing you along and, best case, not taking responsibility for his actions. You are important and deserve the best. 🌸 Ain't no time for guys like him.	/r/FemaleDatingStrategy	19/02/20 02:40 PM
2	Racist 10 Downing Street adviser Andrew Sabisky was a Redditor, he defended rape fantasies, incest and claimed wives should obey men's sex demands Encouraged by pickmes who do, because power = HVM right? 🙄 (Speaking as an ex-pickme who saw this happen a lot at university. Political university clubs are the worst mix of men who act like they're hot shit and pickmes who buy it.)	/r/FemaleDatingStrategy	19/02/20 02:20 PM
2	Survey: What do you think is the root cause of your Pickmieshaism? Love these solutions. 🥰	/r/FemaleDatingStrategy	19/02/20 01:25 PM
1	Men manipulate women through words Oh ew. She should have said, "Excuse me? That's not appropriate," and left. If for some reason she was desperately curious what it was, she should now go on high alert because this old guy is consciously being invasive. Everything that comes out of his mouth from that point forward has to be heard in the light of him having JUST SAID he was about to do a creepy thing and it's okay because she consented. In other words, he doesn't care about real consent (her enjoyment/happiness/safety), and he a…	/r/FemaleDatingStrategy	19/02/20 11:18 AM
3	Realized why I was so obsessed with him. I used to have this problem too. My friends kept telling me I was falling for guys too early, before I knew them well enough to tell if I actually like them or if it's a crush. I never liked this advice because 1) I didn't get how you could just turn off feelings, 2) I couldn't see any difference between that and genuine attraction, and 3) I was scared of suppressing my feelings artificially, and damaging my ability to be attracted in the future. This post from the handbook helped me view it in …	/r/FemaleDatingStrategy	19/02/20 10:31 AM
10	How Dare We Have Standards... Same here. I even turned to TRP when I was younger to figure out what was going on, what was wrong with me. And of course it only made things worse. I took the side of abusers, tried to be better by their standards, and denied and denigrated my own. All because I wanted to be nice & caring & sympathetic, and I genuinely thought it was my fault and my responsibility. I've been questioning all that for a while now, and trying to develop boundaries and treat sex more preciously, but it wasn't until…	/r/FemaleDatingStrategy	19/02/20 10:06 AM