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Talking_Tanuki Archive

View 0 posts and 1,768 comments by Talking_Tanuki on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Showing the 1,000 most recent of 1,768 comments.
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
–

Why should he have had a better experience? He’s using apps where most users are men.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 04:10 PM
–

I’d guess this decision later in life is more well-thought though.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 02:29 PM
2

Not really. One of my girls noticed that by trying to date only Asian men she’s limiting herself to rather conservative guys, but that’s mutual incompatibility.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 01:59 PM
4

Weren’t you going to lie about your intentions to get sex?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 05:42 AM
3

White lies. It’s something that won’t change your partner’s opinion about you if you tell them the truth
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 07:49 PM
3

These are small white lies that have nothing to with abortions or your previous experience. And event these white lies are acceptable only if you tell them that something is wrong eventually.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 07:43 PM
5

No, I wouldn’t lie about anything from your list. It seems like a terrible idea, and I wouldn’t want to date someone who couldn’t accept the real me.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 06:58 PM
3

So it returns us to my main point - saying “you should have…” usually isn’t productive or helpful.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 09:29 PM
1

The problem is that these people most likely are not ready to hear that they have to change their diet. If they were, they wouldn’t have these issues.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 08:22 PM
1

I mean they know what a healthy diet is. They just don’t know that they aren’t really following it, but I think most fat people aren’t delusional.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 07:50 PM
2

My main point is that most of us know what a healthy diet is. The problem is that people don’t actually stick to it.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 07:26 PM
3

These people still know that to lose worthy they have to eat less. They just aren’t ready to actually sit and count their own calories and reduce their calorie intake. People with messy dating lives usually know how a healthy relationship is supposed to look like (with some exceptions), but again they aren’t ready to sit down and look at what they’re doing wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 07:26 PM
1

I don’t think a lot of fat people actually don’t know why they’re fat.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 06:52 PM
3

No, I’m talking more about men and their views on women’s sexuality. Men don’t like it when women sleep around. Can you elaborate?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 06:15 PM
4

Women can feel attraction to men, but it’s usually not “men” as a group but individual men. Yes, we don’t feel broad attraction, but I doubt men would really like women behaving like gay men and sleeping around as much as gay men do.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 06:03 PM
31

What is the point of saying that in the first place? A person cannot change their past, so all this “should have” is a moot point. It would be more productive to say that “you should choose better next time, look at these red flags that you’ve ignored and don’t ignore them anymore”, but let’s be honest, you can’t change someone’s habits or solve their issues by telling them what to do. If a person goes for shitty partners over and over again, pointing out that they ignore red flags might help th…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 06:01 PM
4

Women aren’t men. It doesn’t make sense for women to be as visually and sexually driven as men are.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 05:59 PM
8

I don’t think women will ever spend as much money on OF as men do. What’s alluring about paying for someone’s nudes and imitation of communication?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 05:52 PM
1

Women want their partner to be taller than they are. This is not surprising.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 04:08 PM
9

Never. I don’t feel attraction to people I don’t know, so I never fantasize about strangers.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 12:50 AM
2

What do you think science does? They can’t take people’s words, they have to actually check it. They’re making theories and testing them.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 07:39 PM
1

She should let his wife know that he’s a cheating piece of trash.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 03:59 PM
1

It is extremely predictable, yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 03:56 PM
–

I think if a man has done it multiple times, he should be investigated as a possible stealther.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 06:32 PM
1

You need some water too.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 04:06 PM
3

It’s mostly an online topic. I hope most people aren’t going on dates to ask “what do you bring to the table” because, yes, you’re supposed to figure it out by getting to know a person.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 03:32 PM
–

Why?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 12:21 AM
–

Both are very mid.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 05:41 PM
19

It’s so rare to find good quality porn that could actually arouse me that I’ve stopped watching porn years ago. I’m also considered about the ethical aspect, so I try not to give any views or engagement to this industry.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 05:42 AM
–

I don’t think I’ve ever had to do this, but I’ve also never counted or paid much attention to these things. Just text him or her when you want. Choosing to date people who are clearly enthusiastic about you and who you’re enthusiastic about as well makes everything much easier.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 10:31 PM
6

How would you even try to prove that there are more good men than women? It seems entirely subjective and dependent on your social circle and your bias.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 10:29 PM
–

I’m not saying women have it worse, but denying biological difference here is ridiculous.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 06:47 PM
1

No, neither men or women are superior to each other. Your other questions are based on a wrong premise.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 03:30 PM
–

This is a rant, not a debate post. What do you want people to say? I can say that I’ve never really felt disgust about the idea of dating men. Yes, I don’t find most men romantically attractive, but that about disgust, it’s just a lack of attraction or interest. If I’m feeling a disgust towards a particular man, he’s done something that caused it.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 03:27 PM
–

It can be friendship, but it’s more than a regular friendship which is usually just companionship and having some good time together.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 03:02 PM
–

Sure, but the decline isn’t as steep for men. A man can have kids well into his 50s even though he shouldn’t. A woman having a baby in her 50s is pretty much a miracle.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 02:58 PM
0

The OL is asking the question. If he wants to debate, he needs another post.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 02:51 PM
0

Words have meaning.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 02:50 PM
6

It’s not what we’re discussing rn. The OP has asked a question, and his premise is just wrong. If the other party does it, it doesn’t make his premise right or justify it. It just means both are wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 06:18 AM
12

What is the goalpost here?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 05:46 AM
2

It doesn’t matter. A negative attitude is a very broad statement, and you can’t summarize it as “hate”.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 05:35 AM
9

Negative attitude isn’t the same as hate.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 05:33 AM
2

What is your definition of love? For me, love is a feeling of deep connection, appreciation, and intimacy with another person. It's a bond that's built through shared experiences and truly knowing someone. It's much deeper than skin-deep “she's adorable" or "he's capable, and I admire him." Love grows from understanding who your partner really is and feeling deeply connected to them. It’s your dedication to this person.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 04:03 AM
–

Wedding vows include “to love and to cherish”. Quite often one of the partners stops doing it, so expecting the other to keep their promise is rather ridiculous.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 05:53 PM
–

It makes as much sense as claiming that western men are better than non-western men because they’re more liberal and have less traditional expectations for women. I see a lot of complaints from women in certain countries about their men too.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 02:52 PM
3

And that’s exactly what men are jealous of.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 02:45 AM
3

Again, I’ve listed the things I’m jealous of. It doesn’t mean I deny men’s issues.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 02:39 AM
5

Woman wants a divorce because they’ve been in couples therapy for two years with no progress and he doesn’t communicate. He hid an unpaid bill from her and got their car repossessed.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 12:15 AM
7

So you don’t know the context of the discussion.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 08:05 PM
4

The story the OP’s talking about. Have you checked his link?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 07:21 PM
6

I really don’t think that 2 years of couples therapy and your spouse hiding the bills from you is bare minimum.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 06:52 PM
7

Well, I disagree with the idea that it’s “just words”, but I think that both parties have to uphold their vows. If one spouse mistreats the other, they don’t really follow their vows.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 06:41 PM
–

Unless there’s a dead bedroom. Miraculously, in case of a dead bedroom it’s totally valid to cheat on or to leave your partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 05:10 PM
11

This couple has been in therapy for two years without any improvement, and he hid a bill from her that ultimately led to their car being repossessed. They clearly have serious issues they've been trying to work through. It's hard to say whether they've made no progress because one partner is sabotaging the process or because they're simply incompatible, but there's only so much you can do. If you want to talk about marriage and divorce more broadly, it's a lot more complicated than just "women d…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 04:47 PM
12

It’s hard to make any conclusions from a short video without knowing them or the context of their relationship, but I’d say that being in therapy for 2 years with no improvement and then hiding the bills are really good indicators that something is off.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 04:27 PM
–

There are more male users, and they’re more eager to reach out to women. Female users are more willing to reach out to other women too, so posts from women get more engagement from both genders as a result.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 03:40 PM
9

This what happens when you make really poor financial choices. She’s right to divorce him, he’ll drive her to debt otherwise. I’d say the same if the genders were reversed.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 03:34 PM
18

Part of the vows is “to love and to cherish”. If your partner doesn’t love or cherish you, why would you keep your side of the vows?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 03:33 PM
1

Asian, live in a city, so there aren’t really a lot traditionally masculine chores for boys to do.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 02:47 AM
3

Maybe it’s a cultural thing? I’ve seen it too many times.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 02:17 AM
1

No, what I’ve said is that girls are expected to do more chores, not that only girls are expected to do chores. Every day? No, I don’t think it happens every day to one particular person. It doesn’t happen every day to different women out there, and your statement about men harassing girls might be read as “every day some girls get harassed” too. I try to call out insane takes, but I also don’t spend a lot of time here. I’ve been calling out some women in one dinner related subreddit.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 01:54 AM
6

Just to be clear, I think both sexes have their own problems and neither really has it easier in life.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 12:52 AM
11

I don’t think that men have it much better or easier, I’ve just listed things I’m jealous of.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 12:47 AM
1

I agree these are insane takes. Do you disagree with more tame takes like “women do more chores/girls are raised with higher expectations to do chores” and “a lot of women have experienced being sexually harassed as minors”?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 12:44 AM
0

Could you point out what kind do takes you’re talking about?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 12:21 AM
21

I’m talking about violence linked to dating. Most men aren’t dating men.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 12:16 AM
–

It would make more sense to take an average frequency. It’s around 2 times a week I think.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 07:08 PM
3

Well, we disagree here. Sugar dating implies an explicit agreement where both parties know what exactly they’re exchanging.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 06:42 PM
6

Do you see paying for a date as sugar dating?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 06:32 PM
–

If I had a good relationship with her and I knew that she struggled financially, sure. I don’t really need an iPad anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 06:14 PM
8

Why is LTR/marriage infrequent and so-so?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 05:59 PM
5

Sugar dating is very different from regular dating because the goals are different. It’s basically prostitution with all the risks tied to it.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 05:51 PM
4

I don’t think you should compare sugar dating to regular dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 05:19 PM
42

I don’t feel jealous of men’s dating life, but I’m jealous of their strength and the opportunity to have kids without ruining your own body. No period cramps, no menopause, no pregnancy and giving birth. Dating is also somewhat safer for men. There are still men who experience sexual violence and abuse, but there are less of them and they have physical strength on their side. Far less chances to get date raped. More forgiving biological clock, so they can have kids later on. I think men enjoy se…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 05:04 PM
1

Thinking more about it, Project Hail Mary and Mickey 17 have flawed and heroic male main characters.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 11:16 AM
1

It shows how cults get you. It’s not triumphant, it’s just that she’s given up.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 11:14 AM
1

Have you watched Beef? Main characters are shown as stressed and complex people, but both of them are pretty shitty. I haven’t finished the first season though, this series stresses me out because characters choose the worst options for themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 10:35 AM
2

Divorce and figure out coparenting.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 11:25 PM
–

Never had casual and have no desire to pursue it.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 06:34 PM
–

Libido still drops. Also, hooking up can get boring too.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 06:23 PM
–

Your dick might just stop working one day. Libido also doesn’t stay high forever.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 06:09 PM
5

Polyamory is the closest you can get to relationship socialism, but it really isn’t for everyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 04:58 PM
6

Your life goal and your values are a matter of personal choice, but the moment you share them, there’ll be someone ready to criticize you. That’s just life. I can see some major downsides of the idea to live for romantic life, but it’s your personal choice. Unless you’re making it other people’s issue, objectively, you’re fine and you should just be left to your own devices. Other people shouldn’t expect you to change your values or your goals, but you also shouldn’t expect others to accommodate…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 04:55 PM
1

Good catch, thanks!
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 02:30 PM
2

Are we looking at the same table?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 02:05 PM
–

Liking things isn’t necessarily neuroticism. Do you think men like cars because they’re neurotic?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 07:38 PM
5

It’s a small difference only if you aren’t on the receiving side of it, and that’s the average. There are some couples with completely unbalanced workload, and I’d expect them to be the loudest complainers.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 06:29 PM
15

There are different stats, but quite a few do show that women have less free time than their male partners. https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2013/03/14/chapter-6-time-in-work-and-leisure-patterns-by-gender-and-family-structure/ I think the major problem is that partners cannot compromise to accommodate each other. On an individual level, the stats don’t really matter. If you feel that you’re doing more and you aren’t being appreciated enough, it’s an issue you have to solve with your pa…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 05:13 PM
3

Because more men struggle with getting a partner. I’ve never struggled with it, so why would I try to adjust my behavior of appearance? I see no reason to cater to men as a group. What for?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 04:40 PM
–

We could start with raising literacy and reading comprehension levels.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 04:38 PM
–

The problem is that they probably will find a woman with nude makeup more attractive than the same woman without any makeup. Any other examples?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 04:37 PM
–

To be fair, most men won’t be able to notice nude makeup. With how common makeup and filters are, people’s ideas of what natural beauty is are very distorted. Also, certain things women do for themselves not for men. Men usually don’t like super long nails, but I think women who get them like how those nails look, and they don’t care about men’s opinion on it. So it isn’t a misconception, it’s just different priorities. Do you have any other examples?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 04:23 PM
–

Statistically, what you’re describing isn’t that common. Most women do not marry very wealthy or more attractive men. Whatever benefits give large there aren’t really applicable for most people.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 01:55 PM
–

Only water, my guy. Everything else is reserved for my partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 01:23 PM
–

She’s straight, and some women do have orgasms from PIV. Maybe she could enjoy oral from a man though.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 01:22 PM
–

You assume that most women date wealthy and more attractive men which can’t be statistically true. Most people are close to average and generally date partners close to their level. Couples with heavily mismatched partners or with a huge wealth difference are pretty rare. In reality, men and women both benefit from a good marriage, and both suffer if their partner sucks. Marriage also benefits kids, and that’s a benefit for both partners, not just women.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 01:20 PM
3

Yes. Men are people, and a lot of our needs aren’t really that different. It can be hard to work on your communication and issues or to be a supportive partner when it’s very demanding at times during some hardships, but it isn’t gendered. I also just don’t see the reason to adjust my appearance, interests, or views to cater to men as a group. Just why?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 01:15 PM
–

That’s all I can offer you.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 01:13 PM
–

Sink is over there.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 04:38 AM
5

When I was a teenager, I was curious about boys. What they liked and why. It passed really fast because there isn’t really much to learn. I value my husband’s opinion because he’s my life partner. In the same way I’d value my wife’s opinion if I married a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 04:34 AM
5

My peak interest was when I was a teenager. Turned out men are mostly visual, and a lot of them just want to have someone pretty and pleasant. It isn’t hard to achieve, but the issue is filtering out guys who really want only someone pretty and pleasant and aren’t interested in actually getting to know you. I’ve never tried to get into hobbies or change my views for “men” as a group. I do care about my husband’s opinion, but I think it’s not exactly what you’re asking about.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 04:06 AM
2

It really depends on who you’re talking about. Men often don’t extend this consideration to women either, look at all the discourse about n-counts, single mothers, women who dated some terrible guys in the past and so on. It’s also not much of consideration too. We can admit underlying reason, but on a personal level it doesn’t really matter. If she’s a bitch to me, I’m not going to put up with it just because she was raised this way. If a guy has anger issues, I’m not going to tolerate him more…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 12:23 AM
1

Yes, of course. I think people confuse underlying reason with excuses. Bitchy behavior towards other women can be the result of internalized misogyny, but it is her responsibility to deal with it, and other women don’t have to put up with her behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 12:15 AM
5

“I was born in 2005, and I have no real experience with women, so that makes me an expert on the topic!”
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 12:12 AM
–

More like “the right context”. Women going party no and drinking are generally more open to some casual fun than the same women working.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 12:11 AM
–

I’d say that a lot of women can in the right context, and it depends on more than a guy’s appearance.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 05:28 PM
–

The key word here is some women. Some women can feel instant attraction, and some women can’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 04:56 PM
–

Women have lower libido, and more women have reactive desire meaning they need some stimulation before they feel aroused. Probably more women don’t feel instant attraction ruin either, but it doesn’t mean all women are like this.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 03:55 PM
10

It has nothing to do with saving myself. It’s just that my sexuality is different from your average male sexuality.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 03:12 PM
7

It is still a very very rare event to meet a guy and develop attraction to him. I have to be open to it, and when I’m in a relationship, I just don’t consider anyone else. I don’t have fantasies I’m ashamed of.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 03:11 PM
3

Not really. I’ve never been in the position where I wanted to have sex with a guy and couldn’t because of social shame or reputation. Other scenarios like avoiding casual players or taken men just kill my libido. I’ve never had sex outside of a committed relationship, and while it is against my morals, but I’ve also never even wanted to. I can’t feel attraction to a guy I don’t feel safe with.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 03:08 PM
8

You overestimate how often it really happens. For a lot of women meeting someone they’re into is a rare event, so it really isn’t about restricting yourself all the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 03:03 PM
10

I just don’t feel sexual attraction based on looks alone.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 03:00 PM
15

A lot of us rarely meet people we feel any sexual attraction to. It isn’t about dealing with temptation. There’s no temptation in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 02:12 PM
2

It’s the just world fallacy. It doesn’t mean it’s true, and a lot of us disagree with it. I think struggling guys aren’t necessarily bad people, but they lack attractive qualities or their repelling traits are too strong.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 10:39 PM
1

It’s usually the gender that claims to be rational and stoic.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 03:26 PM
3

Most people have some double standards, whether they realize it or not. Recognizing them means being willing to question your own beliefs, and I don't think most people do. It's not a gender issue, it's just human nature. As for your question, it's pretty broad. Do I want to be treated differently than his guy friends? Sure, we're married, not just friends. Do I want him to coddle me like a child because I'm a woman? No. I want an equal partner who sees me as an equal, and that’s how our marriag…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 12:09 PM
2

You’re repetitive.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 06:58 AM
4

I’m pretty sure it’s your own post.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 06:41 AM
13

Have you just ignored comments that listed what they offer?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 11:47 PM
18

I’m curious whether there is actually an answer that would satisfy you or you just want to vent. People generally don't stay in relationships that bring them nothing. If men choose to date women, it's because they're getting something meaningful out of it. I'm married. My husband tells me all that he feels lucky to have me, so I have reasons to believe that I bring plenty to our marriage. We’re best friends. He can talk to me, vent to me, lean on me for comfort and support. We genuinely enjoy sp…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 08:38 PM
3

And you’re doing it right now.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 09:44 PM
2

No, you can work through it, so you wouldn’t have to lie to yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 08:34 PM
2

No, it isn’t about lying to yourself. Emotions, thoughts, and behavior are all tied together, and they all can influence each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 08:19 PM
2

You can work through your emotions and learn how to redirect them.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 08:15 PM
2

Men perpetuate it.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 08:14 PM
3

No, but my close friend had her first relationship very close to her 30s. I think she plans to stay celibate now.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 03:37 PM
8

Because it can be multiple reasons, and you seem to just brush off the idea that some men are uncaring or bad lovers. If a woman can get off with one guy and not with the other, the chances are high the issue is in a guy.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 11:58 AM
2

Good for you! Some guys here really do it.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 11:10 AM
12

You’re just projecting your experience on all women out there. How are we supposed to argue with it?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 10:55 AM
1

You just think that it is not gossiping because it’s something you do. It’s still gossiping, and gossiping can be done for “research” too.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 10:53 AM
1

But I’m a woman receiving these questions.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 10:47 AM
1

Which is perfectly fine.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 10:44 AM
3

You want to be primary caregiver. That’s how it is called. Stay at home means, well, staying at home. I don’t plan to be a SAHM myself. I’d rather keep working.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 10:42 AM
1

I think it’s both.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 10:41 AM
1

No, if you work part time, you are not exactly a stay at home parent.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 05:33 PM
1

I’m not saying it’s completely impossible, but the chances are pretty slim.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 05:31 PM
3

Men ask for your partner and exes’ height and dick sizes.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 05:27 PM
–

I don’t think gods care about family planning.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 10:41 AM
11

Dude, how does working as a baker and just taking parental leave in a way is being a stay at home dad?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 10:37 AM
–

Goddesses’
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 05:30 AM
–

They do a lot more than abortions. Screenings, STDs tests and treatment, ultrasounds, birth control, some prenatal and postnatal care and so on. They’re doing god’s work.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 05:25 AM
–

You confuse love and respect with fear.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 05:19 AM
–

No, I donate to a few local animal shelters and planned parenthood.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 05:18 AM
3

What a great attitude.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 02:29 AM
15

My guy, what do you bring to the table for a woman to pop out three children and be a provider?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 02:28 AM
2

Same study you were citing. Stay-at-home dads cite more varied reasons for not working for pay. In 2021, 23% stayed home to care for the home or family. That is up from only 4% in 1989 but still well below the share of stay-at-home moms who said the same. About one-third of stay-at-home dads (34%) were not working due to illness or disability, down from 56% in 1989. Some 13% were retired, 13% said they could not find work and 8% were going to school.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 02:28 AM
3

A good share of those 18% are SAHDs who plan to return to the workforce or men with health issues. Very few families have permanent homemakers.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 12:29 AM
42

I think what people are trying to tell you is that your chances to find a woman who wants to have three kids and be the breadwinner while you stay at home are extremely low. Add vegetarian to the mix and your other standards, and you’re searching for a unicorn. You’re entitled to your own standards, but I’d have plan B in case you can’t find anyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 12:28 AM
1

How does it avoid giving stealthers a loophole?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 04:16 PM
1

Do you think there’s a way to implement paper abortions and protect women from malicious actors?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 03:31 PM
1

Okay, so have you seen people assuming the worst about medical abortions?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 02:48 PM
1

Did I say you think this way? Also, do I read it correctly that you oppose medical abortions?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 02:22 PM
2

Isn’t it the same with people opposing medical abortions? In their heads it’s never a mother of three struggling with raising them or a young student who can’t afford to raise a baby, but it’s a party girl who gets abortion every month and hops from dick to dick. Your example isn’t even the worst possible. Imagine a guy who does stealthing on purpose knowing he can just skip any responsibility for a kid, or a man who lies to his partner that he wants to have a kid just to leave her in the end.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 09:34 AM
–

Sorry, I should have checked your flair. Sex doesn’t have to be painful for you to need a recovery period. You get microtears or you can get light bruises if you’re really going at it.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 05:17 AM
–

I promise you it is not unlimited. You get microtears and whatnot, and at some point it’s just painful.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 05:16 AM
–

Girl, not all of have vaginas that can handle it 3 times a day every day.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 05:06 AM
–

If they want to have more sex when their partners don’t, they’ll have to put in some efforts for that. You can’t just magically wish a higher libido.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 05:01 AM
–

Learning how to compromise. A party with higher libido should do more to make sex happen, and a party with lower libido should learn more about their sexuality to get into the mood easier or provide some other “help” for the horny one.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 04:57 AM
–

It might be easier for you to relate if you try shoving a dildo up your ass. Being penetrated vs performing penetration are very different activities. I like sex, but I can’t really have sex several times a day every day.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 04:54 AM
–

Once a day, every day, and after a while it just gets painful. I need recovery time.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 04:52 AM
–

You aren’t the person to complain about a lack of humor.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 04:50 AM
3

They’re fun, but they aren’t something I do often or need.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 02:14 AM
5

No, I don’t. I don’t view sleepovers or trips with my friends as something I need.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 01:14 AM
6

I don’t need sleepovers or trips with my guy friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 12:43 AM
5

Do they need sleepovers and trips with me? Why?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 12:14 AM
7

I’m close with my male friends, but there are some boundaries to respect my husband. I’m not going to have a sleepover with my guy friends or travel with a guy without my husband. I’m still emotionally available and supportive.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 10:00 PM
–

It is an expectation, but it’s the one that is easier to fake and harder to verify until you actually start living together.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 09:29 PM
1

Lilith, this is not the point I’m making. It’s not about choosing to listen or not. It’s about both genders supporting gender roles. It’s just a statement, it doesn’t hold a moral value or instruction.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 05:50 PM
1

There are both men and women who support gender roles. Trying to pretend that it’s only men is disingenuous. The US has a lot of religious people.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 05:43 PM
0

Well, these women still exist and influence the narrative. Look at religious groups and influencers pushing all the bullshit about femininity and masculinity.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 05:16 PM
-1

Yes and no, a lot of women are into gender roles. I don’t think it makes sense to deny that the position “as a man you have to provide for me” comes with certain benefits.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 05:09 PM
2

I think your comment got removed.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 03:36 PM
2

Do you think it might be dictated by your own preferences?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 03:32 PM
2

Do you think men who don’t have strict preferences for traditional femininity are also not desirable partners?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 03:04 PM
1

Which specific traits are you talking about?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 03:03 PM
4

The problem is that we assign certain traits that all adults should have to masculinity. Having a job, taking care of your close ones, enforcing your boundaries, the ability to be persistent when it’s needed, confidence and so on aren’t reserved to masculinity alone. Some of them are just about being a capable adult.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 03:02 PM
0

The willingness to deal with a specific type of baggage.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 08:35 PM
–

Do what you have to do, spend time with people you love, and if you’re lucky, have some time to do your hobbies.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 08:32 PM
0

It depends on the age we’re talking about. Inexperience is not a problem for young people, but if you’re in your 30s and you’ve never been on a date, that comes with inexperience and quite possibly some kind of baggage to deal with.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 08:30 PM
1

Good point, but it can be read as just finding an excuse instead of dealing with your problems.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 11:06 AM
0

The idea here is that a submissive woman probably seeks a dominant man. A guy failing at adulting isn’t that man.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 11:02 AM
1

The idea here is that he doesn’t fit the gender role he probably envisions for men either.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 10:50 AM
3

A lot of women see it as exploitation, yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 12:54 PM
–

It was fairly common when I was younger and single. Now most of my male friends are married, and I usually don’t befriend single guys, so I don’t have this issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/26 05:00 PM
–

Pay attention to those children’s gender too.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/26 04:58 PM
19

Men and women have different sexualities. For a lot of women just looking at a guy is really not enough, and far more men can feel attar ruin and arousal just from looking at a pretty woman. Think about our biology. Women bear the cost of pregnancy and childcare, so why wouldn’t women be pickier than men and have lower libido? Sex costs a lot for us.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/26 04:56 PM
–

Most women date fairly average women. You’re looking at a very specific sample of men committing crimes, and then you wonder why this specific sample doesn’t represent the average.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/26 04:55 PM
1

Anyway, as a woman, I’d rather seek help from a stranger woman than a stranger man. I have more chances to actually get help from her.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 03:59 PM
1

I’ll disappoint you, but it’s mostly women who stand up for other women. You’ll call men doing that white knights.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 03:55 PM
3

I can change my own tire, but also I wouldn’t expect help from random men.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 02:54 PM
3

Comment in a wrong place, sorry.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 02:53 PM
1

I see why he hates women. He chooses the worst ones for relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 02:30 PM
2

Do you think men not hitting women are “standing up for them”? Not hitting someone is the base level of being civil, and some men avoid hitting women only because they don’t want to get jailed not because they think it’s wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 02:22 PM
4

Besides my husband, I don’t really expect men to “stand for me”. And even in case of my husband, it’s in cases when he’s involved, not in general. Like standing up to my mother in law.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 01:55 PM
2

Husband’s misogynistic colleague has really weird experience with women: - Dated a 19 y.o. old when he was 35. She had two kids, and she turned out to be a sex worker. She gave him an STD. - Dated an older woman when he was younger himself. She abused him. He still remembers her fondly. - Dated and financially supported a woman who was clearly using him for money and then cheated on him. I feel sorry for him, but also I think that he’s kinda stupid. With the exception for the older woman who too…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 01:11 PM
3

Interestingly enough, I’ve met quite a few Asian girlies who recommend to avoid Korean guys like the fire.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 09:54 PM
2

It works the other way too. If someone is kind and friendly to you or you just respect and admire a person for something, you’ll see them more attractive than they really are.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 06:27 PM
1

It reeks of insecurity and projection. Putting down other people won’t make them feel more attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 05:27 PM
6

What the fuck, okay, I’m taking back what I’ve just said, people say he’s not attractive because he got a botched plastic surgery.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 05:26 PM
10

It’s the opposite of halo effect. When someone is annoying or is an asshole, you see them as less attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 05:25 PM
3

It looks incredibly dorky. I think husband will book me a therapy session if he sees me with this mask, but I might invest into it in a few years.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 05:24 PM
5

Do you see interaction with women only as “necessary” or “romantic”? No female friends? I’ve been arrived for years, and while I don’t care about other men romantically, I still have guy friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 04:15 PM
7

To be frank, I think you might be projecting how you’d feel and act if you had endless options.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 03:18 PM
14

Why do you treat women as aliens who have completely different psychology? What you’re talking about isn’t gendered at all. There are men and women who value the time spent together, growth with their partner, and efforts they put into their relationships. There are people who put instant gratification and excitement of a new relationship above everything else. Husband and I have a very simple life. We have our routine that works for us, and our dates are usually going to the park, museum, art g…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 03:16 PM
1

Slender and fit with elongated limbs.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/26 07:43 PM
2

How is it a shit test if it’s her genuine reaction? The difference in your reaction is just a difference between a person who’s comfortable and secure vs a guy who seeks and depends on external validation too much.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/26 07:43 PM
2

It doesn’t mean that all young men are permanently single before 30. If I remember correctly, only around 30% of 18-30 y.o. men re virgins.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 12:41 PM
2

Most guys below 30 are single, and most men above 30 are in relationships. Letting you all spend your formative years online was a big mistake.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 12:32 PM
0

Nah, saying that taller people usually have better proportions doesn’t mean you hate short people. Dating is more complex than “oh, you like tall people, you must hate me!” Think what you can bring to the table instead of just concentrating on what you don’t have.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 12:29 PM
2

Why?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 12:25 PM
1

No, dude, I think you’re the one who was supposed to start college this year.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 12:25 PM
1

It’s not gendered. Taller women usually have better proportions too.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 12:24 PM
2

Statistically most men are in relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 12:24 PM
3

Statistically most.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 12:01 PM
1

Yeah, there’s too tall at some point too.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 11:57 AM
3

You should study. Have you started your college courses?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 11:52 AM
1

I see tall men pursuing tall women to have tall babies.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 11:45 AM
2

A lot of average dudes date.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 11:36 AM
0

I think taller people usually have better aesthetics, but I’ve never pursued men just because they’re tall.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 11:35 AM
3

Scammy.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 11:33 AM
–

Do you think men who dread their partners really care about it?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 04:57 PM
–

A woman can force herself to have sex without being aroused. It’s a painful experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 01:23 PM
–

No.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 01:22 PM
–

It really comes down to you and your partner’s boundaries and values. A lot of people would see intentional dreading as completely out of bounds, and that could easily end a relationship. If the partner doing the dreading is okay with that, then do they even value their spouse? I also don’t think it’s an effective way to spark genuine desire. Sure, your partner might get anxious and start having more sex in an effort to keep you from leaving, but is that really attraction? A lot of people actual…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 05:53 AM
–

You sound like a good company.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 05:30 AM
–

Some men have very short refractory period.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 11:35 PM
–

This level of insecurity has to be studied.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 03:59 PM
–

Maybe you should expand your social circle more. We usually talk about things we’re doing. Work, health, family, hobbies, plans on the future and so on. Yes, my single friends can tell me about their dates, but it takes maybe 5% of our conversations.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 03:59 PM
–

We usually pay in turns. Treating your friends is fun.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 03:56 PM
26

If two people stay together because they feel like they have no other options, is that really love? When you truly love someone, you want to be with them, and you’re not constantly thinking about other people. I’m with my husband because I love him and I choose to be with him. He’s not just “another option” to me, and no other man could compare to him. He’s the love of my life, and he’s the only person I want to be with.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 03:30 AM
–

I’m not sure, but I think it’s the most common pattern.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 03:22 AM
–

Male elephants are aggressive, they can attack and kill females and calves, so females drive them out of their natal families.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 12:58 AM
–

Most adult men aren’t bald.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 12:54 AM
–

Sex isn’t charity.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 11:50 AM
–

You didn’t really answer the question.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 10:37 AM
–

No, most men absolutely don’t like most women.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 09:36 AM
2

Most men like most women This is false.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 03:34 AM
1

I don’t think attraction works the same way hunger does. Libido might, but attraction itself doesn’t. I had one boyfriend in high school, and he was the only guy I was attracted to back then. It wasn’t just about his looks, it was his personality, and the way he made me feel. If attraction was only about appearance, I could’ve dated a number of guys who looked similar to him. I didn’t date anyone after him until college.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 02:35 AM
1

I don’t think you can know it for sure without a longitude study. It can be both.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 01:01 AM
1

Prostitutes aren’t known for good mental health, so that checks.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 12:50 AM
0

Why? I’ve never really had an issue moving on when it was clear that we were incompatible.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 12:47 AM
0

It might be more about reliving her youth.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 12:46 AM
4

The problem with “basic level” is that everyone’s understanding what basic is different. You should list at least big groups of things you consider basic.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 11:19 PM
10

Maybe because you haven’t listed it?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 11:12 PM
7

A romantic partner is a close friend and a lover besides just being a reliable partner/roommate. If you don’t spend time together for fun besides just cooking or eating together, what’s the point? On the other hand, a lot of people struggle with bringing and fulfilling even the basic things you’ve described.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 10:55 PM
0

I’m not saying that it’s an individual issue. Women on average put more efforts into their social nets.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 10:47 PM
1

We’re talking about needs vs wants. Sex is a want, you might argue that some desires have to be fulfilled to be happy.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 08:44 PM
1

What? Where did you get this number from?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 08:43 PM
1

But you aren’t dying! So men can be celibate.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 07:43 PM
1

Tribes living in those conditions beg to differ.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 07:42 PM
1

You can. Aren’t you celibate?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 07:39 PM
1

Jungles, desert, tundra…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 07:38 PM
1

I’m not celibate because I’m married, but some of my friends have been celibate for years.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 07:34 PM
2

What unhealthy attitudes?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 07:34 PM
1

Depending on your region, you might easily die without housing.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 07:32 PM
1

I agree with this, but it comes with women putting more efforts into their social nets. When people say that it takes a village, women are more willing to be this village for each other. Having said that, it means that partnered men benefit more from their partners at least in this regard.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 07:31 PM
3

The obsession with height is largely the result of social media imv.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 05:33 PM
1

No one has been able to explain how my life is much easier than my husband’s when our reality is pretty much the same. He doesn’t have to deal with periods and pregnancy though.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 05:30 PM
2

How is it related to “no sex without commitment”? I’ve never had casual, but I also don’t view sex as work. I wouldn’t have sex without commitment for the same reason I wouldn’t have a sleepover with a new friend without building some rapport first.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 05:29 PM
0

You won’t die without sex, so it isn’t the same as water.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 05:27 PM
5

A lot of women are very forward about preferring taller guys. Men don’t like it either.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 05:27 PM
3

Because misogyny. When a woman complains about something, she’s not trusted because some doctors think she does it for attention or maybe she exaggerates or it’s “in her head”.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 05:26 PM
30

They’re the same compliments directly trashing the opposite gender. Women are okay with the second type for the same reason men are okay with the first type.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/26 10:08 PM
–

It’s the difference between appreciating a gift from your partner and expecting them to buy you an expensive gift to prove their feelings.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/26 10:07 PM
–

I’m talking about guys who have to specifically ask or even demand that. If he doesn’t feel validated, there’s either a relationship issue or he’s insecure.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/26 09:07 PM
–

I think if a guy has to ask or demand for a specific sexual act to confirm her feelings, there’s an issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/26 09:02 PM
2

It’s a natural outcome of a trusting committed relationship. I think men who want their partner to prove that she treats them better than her exes either have some issues or there are some relationship problems.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/26 05:24 PM
3

This. The only person I’ve had unprotected sex with is my husband.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/26 04:36 PM
6

Sex with my husband is superior to sex with my ex-boyfriends, we have it more often, and it’s kinkier. I think it’s the result of me exploring what I like more, being less timid, and him being a great lover.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/26 04:28 PM
–

It doesn’t mean a guy isn’t a dick.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 06:43 PM
–

Narcissistic guy who’s a shitty father?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 05:28 PM
–

The mindset of dating shitty men?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 04:32 PM
1

What are their other options?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 05:14 PM
1

Can you give examples of different responses?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 04:44 PM
2

It’s the same for women. We either take the risks or we don’t. It doesn’t mean that predators should go unpunished.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 04:38 PM
–

Most me over 30 aren’t single. They aren’t all boomers and Gen X, millennials exist! Dating apps don’t work for a lot of people. If they don’t work for you, and you keep using them exclusively, it’s on you.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/26 05:12 PM
–

It was supposed to be “most men aren’t”. If the apps don’t work for them and they keep using the apps, that’s on them.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/26 03:42 PM
–

Most men are 6’3 with 10/10 looks, and they still date. A lot of struggling men don’t really do “everything right”, but it’s hard for them to see what exactly they’re doing that ruins their dating life. I’ve given you a clear explanation, but you can’t accept it because it contradicts your beliefs.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/26 02:23 PM
–

You’re confusing fault with responsibility. It isn’t necessary his fault that he can’t date, but it’s his responsibility to deal with it. Meaning that if he wants to date, he has to figure out what stops him and improve that. No one else can do this for him. It isn’t women’s responsibility to date him out of pity or to try and fix him.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/26 01:50 PM
–

They can be not in the mood because their partner has fucked up. Expecting to have sex independent from your partner’s mood is being entitled.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/26 01:46 PM
–

Maybe accepting that as adults we’re all responsible for our own daring lives?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/26 01:45 PM
–

You’re proving my point.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/26 10:25 PM
–

That’s what I’m talking about. You don’t know how women think, you just believe you do. There’s zero chance one could have a healthy relationship thinking that their partner is going to fuck them up.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/26 10:09 PM
–

I’m sure you’d be happy, but I really doubt you’d stop creating terrible scenarios in your head.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/26 01:25 PM
–

What I see in BP spaces is that guys actively try to come up with the worst scenarios. I don’t think they’ll stop if they suddenly get a girlfriend.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 10:52 PM
1

Personally I find that the best way to be submissive is to make a habit of smiling softly and saying very little. This is beyond pathetic.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 06:32 PM
0

If they’re young, maybe? But if they’re deep into pills, they’ll most likely ruin their relationship and it will be a case of self-fulfilling prophecy pushing them even deeper.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 01:22 PM
2

Where are you from? I’ve seen some opposite examples, but it’s usually in more traditional cultures or it comes from manosphere.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 10:04 PM
2

What?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 08:25 PM
10

That’s cheater logic, and people who don’t cheat usually don’t buy into that nonsense. Men who cheat come up with a similar kind of garbage justifications, it’s not unique. People who live by “fuck around and find out” almost never own their role when things blow up on them. And yeah, society treats violence against women as more serious because it ranks harm differently. It’s still sexism, just pointed in a different direction this time, and men get the short end of it. The go-to advice is alwa…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 08:02 PM
1

And you’re stealing from a person with dietary issues. What a good brother you are!
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 05:19 PM
1

Maybe she just eats all your food.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 04:43 PM
2

Very summery!
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 04:43 PM
1

Completely reasonable then. She bought it for herself.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 04:15 PM
1

Couple? Roommates? I hated it when my roommate ate my food.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 04:10 PM
1

Picture?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 04:08 PM
5

Cucking fantasies everywhere. I think some guys just should give in and buy the fucking armchair.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 04:08 PM
6

Make 👏 it 👏 harder 👏 for 👏 young 👏 men 👏 to 👏 find 👏 a date!
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/26 04:37 PM
18

If a woman throws other women under the bus to get male validation, she’s a pickme. Some people just use it as an insult for any woman they disagree with. You can see the same with “white knight”. Some men are called white knights just because they’re good partners or they disagree with insane generalizations about women.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/05/26 04:34 PM
2

What did you cook? It usually takes me an hour or hour and a half to cook something for dinner including a salad. Husband manages in less than an hour.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/26 11:41 PM
2

Do you think better clothes fit the description?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/26 03:10 PM
13

The definition of manipulation.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/26 11:13 PM
28

For the same reason why working on your style and picking clothes that make you look more handsome aren’t a manipulation.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/26 10:35 PM
–

Sexuality is a spectrum. Viewing heterosexuality as default is reductive, but when we view it as a spectrum, it is not.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/26 03:41 PM
–

If you ignore posts about career issues, health problems, disabilities, sexual assaults, dying pets, poverty, debt, eating disorders and other mental health issues, family drama, then, yeah, it’s mostly relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/26 03:27 AM
–

I’m a feminist, and I think a lot of other feminists treat men in a similar way.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/26 02:19 AM
–

I’d perfectly content if men treated me the way I treat them. All affections from my husband, and interactions with all other men are purely platonic.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/26 01:22 AM
–

That’s naive as hell. Anyone, man or woman, can walk out on you, no matter how much you helped or supported them. You can carry them through poverty, sickness, mental breakdowns, all of it, and they’ll still leave like it meant nothing.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/26 01:21 AM
1

It usually happens when we’re teenagers.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 10:17 PM
3

I’ve seen the opposite you’re talking about, but it’s usually content for women. “Be more feminine if you want a masculine man”, “he doesn’t lead your family because you don’t let him”.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 10:16 PM
2

Dude, I’m sorry for your upbringing. I hope you’ll be able to get away and stand in your own feet.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 03:23 AM
1

What did your parents do that you both turned out this way?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 07:29 PM
2

It’s just something we have to deal with unless we all just start dating our own gender.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 07:28 PM
3

We’ll never know.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 07:24 PM
1

What if you see male sexuality as it is, and that’s why you feel disdain for it?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 06:14 PM
2

How can you be independent when you’re a NEET? Your parents have done something wrong if both their kids struggle with adulting.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 02:47 PM
2

No, you clearly know nothing about women.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 02:46 PM
3

How’s your sister doing? Is she better at the whole adulting stuff? Has a job?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 02:34 PM
2

Using your own argument, you do not have a vulva to know anything about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 02:33 PM
1

Your parents must be really patient and generous.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 02:25 PM
3

Oh no, your poor wife. Some women are cripplingly shy, but it usually gets better with some experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 02:22 PM
3

What can you possibly know about it?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 02:22 PM
6

Don’t listen to guys who have zero experience. My friend went on a date with a guy specifically because “he looks like he eats”, and I’ve never heard a woman making a fun of a guy for performing oral.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 02:21 PM
–

Ugly men are usually just ignored and sometimes made fun of because some people are stupid and cruel.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/26 10:39 PM
–

Are women the moral arbiters for everyone now? What?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/26 10:38 PM
–

It’s hard to address your claim because it’s extremely broad. A lot of people are criticized for their views and policies, and then they’re also mocked for their appearance.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/26 09:22 PM
–

You broke him.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/26 09:21 PM
–

It isn’t hard, but that wasn’t my point.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/26 08:52 PM
–

You don’t have to be a pick me to find a partner. I got married without putting down other women or being a bangmaid.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/26 08:15 PM
–

People who think that everyone wants to SA them should get mental health help, sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/26 05:23 PM
1

I’ve read your other comments here, but I still don’t agree with you. Sure, we can’t ever know someone 100%, and people don’t even fully know themselves. But the way you treat others comes from who you are as a person. Those things aren’t separate, they’re connected and influence each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/26 05:23 PM
–

How does it make you exhausted?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/26 05:21 PM
–

I promise you, most people don’t give a fuck. They don’t care about you, and they don’t think about you, they’re busy living their own lives.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/26 05:20 PM
–

We can see how you act.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/26 05:07 PM
–

My husband and I both play video games. I think games are only a problem if you neglect your responsibilities or relationships to play, but it works this way for any hobby.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/26 03:54 PM
–

That’s not true. Men seek women who they’re sexually attracted to first and foremost. Everything else comes later.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/26 03:52 PM
–

I don’t know the numbers, but there are games targeting women. They’re usually more chill and cozy.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/26 03:51 PM
–

A lot of women play video games themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/26 03:08 PM
–

Girl is against video games, and it’s a weird hill to die on.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/26 01:30 PM
1

Still no because we want to have kids. Maybe if we switched genders?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/26 01:02 PM
1

I think the main “cost” here isn’t marriage itself but kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/26 02:26 AM
2

She’s making it pretty clear she has no interest in having sex. If he thinks this can be fixed without ending in divorce, he’s kidding himself.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/26 02:11 AM
7

Early 30s. No, because my husband isn’t into men.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/26 01:57 AM
1

I see more guys complaining about entitled women and taking about “deserving a parter”.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/26 06:04 PM
–

Who is actually stopping them right now?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/26 04:02 PM
–

What’s amusing about a person with a broken a wrist who can’t get medical help? It’s depressing more than anything else.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/26 02:45 PM
–

Do you live in some rural area? We might have different views, but it doesn’t mean I want you to suffer.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/26 02:30 PM
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Why? You’re a just a person in pain. And it’s going to take a whole week to get the scan? This is ridiculous.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/26 02:25 PM
–

I don’t take any pleasure in people suffering. Have you been to the ER?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/26 02:18 PM
–

You won’t become an addict if you take ibuprofen although I’m not sure that ibuprofen will help with a broken wrist. Have you…not been to a doctor yet?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/26 02:13 PM
2

How is this supposed to work? The way my husband treats me, and the way I treat him, comes down to who we are as people. If I weren’t caring and responsible, I wouldn’t be a dependable partner. And if he wasn’t loyal and family-oriented, he wouldn’t put me and our marriage first.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/26 02:06 PM
3

But attraction is not love, isn’t it? You’re using these two as if they were the same things.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/26 02:01 PM
10

I feel you’re confusing love with attraction here. These are different things, and love requires far more time.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/26 04:28 AM
8

I’d argue that loyalty, support, and attraction are shown and practiced by actions as well. They aren’t inherent to a person either. Also, men care about finances more than they think they do. A lot of men do get bitter and resentful if their partner suddenly stops working and becomes fully financially dependent.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/26 04:19 AM
10

All love is conditional, including a man’s love.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/26 04:03 AM
20

How your partner treats you mostly comes down to who they are as a person. So it’s less about drawing a hard line and more about what you actually value in a relationship. If a woman is with her husband just for money, then yeah, she probably doesn’t love him for who he is. But if she genuinely enjoys being around him, values his presence, and admires his character, then she does love him as a person. You could still argue she loves what he brings to her life like companionship or support, but t…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/26 04:02 AM
2

That sounds reasonable.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 10:18 PM
2

What are your criteria?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 06:30 PM
2

Staying single is a perfectly valid choice.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 06:22 PM
3

You’re confusing a debate with a relationship argument.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 03:58 PM
–

I think an online group could be a good practice place to be more emotionally open without the hurdle of going out and meeting people in real life. It isn’t ideal, but you have very limited choices here. Sorry you’re going through it. I hope you’ll feel better, and you will be able to go out and connect with people.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 03:22 PM
5

Different women! We can’t force all women to have the same belief system.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 03:16 PM
–

You’re saying it isn’t anxiety, but it sounds exactly like anxiety. Maybe online support groups then?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 03:12 PM
9

Do you understand what loyal means?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 03:08 PM
3

How does it relate to the OP’s point?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 03:07 PM
3

If they want to have a relationship, they should be open to it. Of course, it’s fine to be single.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 03:07 PM
7

This is a subreddit to debate gender issues and dating related topics. The OP has raised a valid topic, a lot of struggling men don’t understand that staying single might be a better choice than dating a partner who doesn’t make your life better. It isn’t about personal preferences or desire for attention, this is a debate topic.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 03:07 PM
3

That kinda was my point.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 03:03 PM
–

Is it because of your mental health?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 03:03 PM
4

Yes and no. A person should be open to the idea of a relationship, but who they have a relationship also matters. You can’t make it work with a wrong partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 11:25 AM
6

Do you disagree with my position? Could you give me an example of a comment that you think illustrates your point?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 11:24 AM
–

You’re isolated, and that’s not good for your mental health. Could you seek any support groups?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 11:23 AM
0

Do you think I’m expressing other of these sentiments? Can you give me examples?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 11:14 AM
–

Do you have friends you could talk to? You need some safe space to practice that.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 11:13 AM
5

It means that some people do say stupid shit.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 11:00 AM
15

I don’t think “he better be worthy of me” is the same as valuing your peace and avoiding relationships that don’t add anything positive to your life. I’m married, and I agree with that mindset. It’s not about refusing to compromise or putting in zero effort, it’s about investing your time and energy into relationships that are actually worth it.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 10:48 AM
4

Do you think they’re abusive themselves?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 10:45 AM
5

It goes both ways, sure, and either side can end up being an unpleasant surprise over time, but it really comes down to choosing someone you’re compatible with and vetting your partner. If you start dating a social butterfly, it’s not reasonable to expect them to turn into a homebody and so on.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 10:44 AM
15

Why is that considered toxic? If being with your partner isn’t better than being single, then something’s off. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t put in effort, but that effort should actually be worth it in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 10:39 AM
11

I’ve seen guys here claiming that they’d pick an abusive partner over no partner, and that seems close enough to what he’s saying.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 10:36 AM
–

Dude, you can’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/26 02:58 PM
–

No.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/26 02:57 PM
–

You have no way to know that, and your insecurity will fuck you up.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/26 02:36 PM
–

You’re also planing to cheat on your wife because you know she’s not gonna be into you.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/26 02:32 PM
–

I don’t support women making stupid decisions.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/26 02:30 PM
–

No, the dick-pilled user thinks all women want huge dicks.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 09:08 PM
–

Then it’s the most boring troll out there.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 08:20 PM
–

Size matters, but few women require gigantic dicks.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 08:19 PM
–

You have to get your shit together.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 03:32 PM
–

Aren’t your parents going to pay for your education? Make their money worth it.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 03:29 PM
–

They do, but I guess they’re very picky. To be a sugar baby you need to be appealing enough and make their money spent on you worth it.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 03:25 PM
–

Beggars can’t be choosers.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 03:22 PM
–

That’s what you get when you have to live with your parents.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 03:21 PM
–

He probably doesn’t have any real experience nor he’ll get any because he’s so obsessed with dick sizes. It’s like trying to explain color to a person whose chose refuses to open their eyes.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 03:20 PM
6

Is PPD a men sub? I call out people who are misandrists.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 02:24 PM
–

Check marriage subreddit. People get some good advice there, and it isn’t necessarily just “divorce!”
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 02:20 PM
7

Younger people are more immature than older people. That comes with having less experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 02:15 PM
6

Calling all men immature is sexism too, just as I’ve said in my comment.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 02:14 PM
47

Do you not see the difference between these two statements? Young people are immature, that’s the feature of being young and having little experience. Claiming that a whole gender is immature is sexism whether you’re talking about men or women.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 10:40 AM
–

How many orbiters does your wife have?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 05:47 AM
–

That’s not his point.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 04:54 AM
–

Is he wrong though?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 04:02 AM
2

DV is heavily underreported. Also, if women were stronger physically and could cause as much damage with bare hands as men can, at least some male abusers would be afraid of retaliation.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/26 02:07 PM
1

From alcohol.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/26 01:10 PM
20

You have to really fuck up the word “men” to get “humans” instead.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/26 11:59 AM
1

You should be abstaining.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/26 11:48 AM
3

Drinking to deal with stress can be a sign of alcoholism.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/26 11:35 AM
2

But you idealize women who have to risk their health to cook.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/26 11:33 AM
1

I don’t think I’m allowed to link it.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/26 11:12 AM
1

That’s because you have to cook for yourself. You have no woman to risk her health for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/26 11:06 AM
2

She’s still exposed to the smoke from the oven even you can’t see it.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/26 11:04 AM
2

Yeah, and that’s how they get health issues, but it’s not something you care about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/26 11:04 AM
2

In rural India, cooking practices often involve the use of solid fuels such as wood, crop residues, or dung, resulting in the release of harmful pollutants. This study highlights the potential link between prolonged exposure to cooking smoke and the increased incidence of lung cancer among women in these communities. https://www.jto.org/article/S1556-0864(25)03001-1/abstract
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/26 11:02 AM
1

She surely gets more smoke exposure from this oven than from cooking on an electric stove.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/26 10:59 AM
3

A young girl exposed to smoke on a daily basis increasing her risks of lung cancer?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/26 10:53 AM
3

A few times, but it’s mostly guys from the other sub who want to be angsty in DMs.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/26 10:52 AM
3

Do I keep a roster of gay guys and married men? These days I don’t really befriend single straight guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/26 10:50 AM
9

This isn’t how I dated when I was single, and it’s not how my friends date either. I don’t see women ranking guys or keeping backups around, it usually just comes down to “Do I like him?” Keeping orbiters is a hassle most women don’t engage with. My friends have mostly gay guy friends or straight guys who are in relationships or married. When I’m dating someone, I’m all in, I’m not thinking about other options. I avoid men who hit on me. When I’ve ended relationships, it wasn’t to jump into some…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/26 10:49 AM
5

They can be, but motivation is different.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/26 04:23 PM
15

Men are hornier, and they have higher motivation to pursue women. Guys trying to get pics from lonely women are not being helpful - they’re pursuing their own goals.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/26 11:44 AM
3

The just world fallacy.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/26 02:32 AM
3

I have no issues with this statement. Morality has little to do with dating success, and both terrible men and women often have no issue finding partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/26 02:21 AM
–

He’s in India where most marriages are arranged marriages, and the labor market is competitive too.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/26 09:18 PM
–

My point is that whatever she does, he’ll find something to be insecure about.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/26 02:53 PM
–

There are no ways to know for sure. Even a doctor can’t tell in some cases.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/26 02:40 PM
–

Your insecurity will convince you that she’s not a virgin or that she’s not into you.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/26 02:09 PM
–

It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy at this point. I’m curious to see how you’ll deal with your arranged marriage going south.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/26 02:06 PM
–

Choosing a college with “no chads” is insane. Imagine letting black pill dictate where you get your education.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/26 02:03 PM
–

If you’re looking for something causal, maybe, but then you still need passion and attraction. For an LTR, connection is necessary though.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/26 08:00 PM
1

You seem to think that men are withdrawing in high numbers, but I don’t really see that.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/26 06:30 AM
1

Both men and women are less interested in dating. I don’t think it’s a problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/26 06:15 AM
–

How old are you?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/26 04:44 AM
–

You don’t live up to your own standards.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/26 04:36 AM
–

Dude, you’re a NEET. Where are you leading?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/26 04:13 AM
–

Maybe you’ll reincarnate as a male hyena.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/26 04:13 AM
–

This is hilarious, but nature is not patriarchal.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/26 03:52 AM
–

No.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/26 03:47 AM
–

I’ve seen a post from a guy complaining that his ex-wife has moved on. They divorced because he suddenly decided he needs to be the “leader of the house” after they had a kid, and she didn’t want to put up with it. I’m curious how many couples have divorced because a man got into manosphere content.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/26 02:45 AM
4

Have no idea, but I’m questioning his choices dating and having sex with an asexual woman. Just why?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 08:30 PM
3

I’ve read that some asexual people can still have “the urges”…they just aren’t attracted to people.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 08:24 PM
3

Why is he dating an asexual when he isn’t asexual himself?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 08:24 PM
2

Women who are asking that clearly are looking in the wrong places. Their issue isn’t men abstaining from dating, but their picker.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 08:18 PM
1

According to the OP, in this scenario he just can’t have sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 05:20 PM
14

I think men who abstain from dating just aren’t interested in it, and that’s okay. I’m not really curious about their reasons or intentions because it doesn’t concern me. Staying single is a valid option, and I don’t judge people for that.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 03:07 PM
10

Parents love their children even when they’re grown adults, and we definitely have examples of mothers doting on their adult sons, and there are examples of exactly your hypothetical when a grown child is disabled and is dependent on their parents. Also, a big part of child care or even taking care of stray animals is not cute at all. You’re dealing with poop, vomit, illnesses, with cats or dogs it’s also parasites and so on.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 02:08 PM
1

Understandable, but I think most men don’t have a degree.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 12:05 PM
0

How am I a beneficiary of some guys I don’t even know?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 12:03 PM
0

You do not perform emotional labor for a whole society. Who are individual people who you actually perform it for?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 12:03 PM
1

A few hours in the gym do the trick.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 06:29 AM
1

None of the listed traits describe me.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 06:25 AM
0

Overweight, in debt, too much porn, sedentary.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 06:13 AM
1

Male lions who live in prides all are busy with patrolling. People delegate this job to professionals, so most men don’t really do any patrolling. So we can delegate cooking too, and men actually have the time to cook unlike lions.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 06:01 AM
0

Most men don’t do any patrolling.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 05:55 AM
3

Male lions hunt occasionally, but they’re busy with patrolling and protecting the territory. I don’t see most men doing much patrolling.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 05:49 AM
2

If you think that male lions don’t hunt, you’re wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 05:44 AM
5

We’re comfortable, but how is it even related?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 05:35 AM
5

You’re old enough to know better. People in your life should hold your fucked up views against you.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 05:31 AM
1

Lions have a matriarchal core. Male lions form coalitions because they have to leave their prides.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 04:48 AM
0

To perform consistent emotional labor you need someone you perform it for. Who’s the beneficiary here?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 04:47 AM
0

How old are you?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 04:45 AM
3

That’s an interesting thought experiment. I’m not asexual, and I like sex, but I also think that I can live without it. I’d at least try to date him. I’m not sure whether I’d get too frustrated to live without sex, but it seems worth it.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/26 12:42 AM
–

I don’t judge incels for not having experience, but their ways to cope look more like self-harm. Also, I’m not gonna accept or tolerate shitty generalizations about women because a dude is inexperienced.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 07:58 PM
–

That’s a good point, and I think it works for bit genders.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 07:31 PM
0

Nice guys who have nothing besides being nice? Maybe. Nice guys who are also interesting to hang out with? Doubt that.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 07:31 PM
–

What does suboptimal mean?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 05:50 PM
–

Women who are into them? My husband got me, and most of my guy friends have dated and married women who are pretty similar to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 05:46 PM
–

So it is about sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 05:42 PM
–

No. I want to know why you are complaining about, not what some other people are saying.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 05:42 PM
–

What specially do people criticize about men performing their gender role?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 05:03 PM
–

Why do you think they struggle with dating? I think guys who are in touch with their emotions have a pretty good time dating, and they don’t necessarily look like “chads”.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 05:01 PM
–

I agree with it, but when a woman says that some guys get offended.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 05:00 PM
–

It’s a common topic here. Have you never seen it?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 05:00 PM
–

Where is the line between performance and the behavior you adopted growing up because it was expected of you?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 04:59 PM
–

What do you mean by “a soft guy”?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 03:38 PM
–

I see criticism here mostly from men who don’t share either of the positions, and that makes sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 03:37 PM
–

Isn’t it my point? I’ve seen men express both of these opinions here and in some other manosphere-related communities, and I don’t see a lot of men there disagreeing with them, but these two positions are contradictory.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 03:18 PM
–

Black pillers generally have a very negative attitude towards women too.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 03:05 PM
–

These two are common talking points in manosphere, and I don’t see those guys arguing with each other about it. It seems they’re able to rationalize it somehow. Women are the best thing in the world that can happen to a guy, the only meaning there is for a man, but they’re also the world evil. I’m exaggerating of course.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 02:54 PM
–

It’s a superposition where they change their state depending on the argument they need.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 02:50 PM
–

It’s a common talking point in manosphere.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 02:49 PM
–

I’ve noticed an interesting juxtaposition recently. Single men are extremely lonely because women don’t date them. Women also don’t provide anything in relationships, and their only value is sexual. If women don’t really provide emotional support and comfort, how dating them is supposed to make you feel less lonely?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 02:23 PM
–

Real life. I’ve tried the apps, and I didn’t like the experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 02:02 PM
2

Trad wives are usually SAHMs with a bunch of kids, and they have the hierarchy in their family. A man is supposed to lead.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 03:29 AM
16

Sample bias. You don’t notice single toxic guys and normal guys in relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 03:27 AM
2

How often do you need someone to tell you what to do? I usually go to whoever has the right expertise for the situation. Sometimes that’s my husband, other times it’s my dad, friends, cousins, boss or coworkers. It really depends on what kind of advice I’m looking for. But I think you’re talking about something different, not just advice or guidance. Are you asking who comes first, your parents or your partner? I do expect my husband to prioritize me to a certain extent, but that doesn’t mean he…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 02:28 AM
1

An orgasm is a good sleeping pill.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 01:03 AM
1

Is my husband the only guy producing sperm out there?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 12:13 AM
4

If you ever get insomnia, you know what you should do.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 11:35 PM
4

So men can just take shots of their own sperm to fight insomnia.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 11:25 PM
6

Did it fly over your head?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 04:55 AM
9

And a lack of pirates causes global warming.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 04:54 AM
8

Patriarchy got widespread due to multiple reasons, but the idea of fatherhood most likely has more to do with personal belonging and inheritance. They’re a result of social and economic development, but not patriarchy itself. Also, patriarchy as we know has lasted for a really short time compared to our overall history.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 03:49 AM
10

People usually don’t have a lot of kids, and raising kids used to be the task of a whole village.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 03:39 AM
45

If you want to talk about fertility, women with young children should be at the peak of attractiveness because nothing proves fertility like already having kids. Men tend to avoid single mothers though.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 03:33 AM
–

Not really. As long as he doesn’t try to push me, follow me or something in these lines, I’m fine with the interaction.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/26 10:09 PM
–

Most likely I’d still reject him. I don’t like the idea of dating a stranger.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/26 10:00 PM
–

A little flattered, a little uneasy. I’d let him know I’m married and hope he respects that and doesn’t make things awkward.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/26 09:58 PM
–

We’re talking about averages and generalizations. Most women haven’t slept with “at least 10 different men” and haven’t had group sex. I don’t think a lot of people claim that women don’t use online dating apps, the point is that people still can meet offline.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/26 09:54 PM
–

What is the role of a spouse? For me, my husband is my partner, but we’re also friends and lovers. Remove one of these roles, and the whole idea of marriage makes little to no sense to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/26 05:42 PM
5

Good luck trying to stop men from dating younger women.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/26 06:05 PM
1

Reread my comment!
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/26 05:46 PM
1

A lot of women date their peers, but, yes, young me have to compete with guys a bit older than they are. Do you want to ask older men to stop pursuing younger women?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/26 05:46 PM
6

I know, but this post is low effort, and the OP engages poorly with commenters.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/26 04:13 PM
12

Edited the comment. Address my points
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/26 06:32 AM
30

Why do mods allow posts like this? It’s low effort. OP, you should at least include some sources. Like I said in the daily thread, just because you don’t condemn something doesn’t mean you’d actually do it yourself. The overall number of single men and women is about the same, there are just differences across age groups.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/26 06:31 AM
1

Were men really taught that they should lower their standards? As a younger millennial I don’t think I’ve really seen it. The message was closer to “women don’t exist just to be a sexual object for you or please you”, and that has little to do with visual preference men have. I think body positivity largely failed. Social media, filters, and wide-spread surgeries have increased breath standards for both genders, and both men and women are justified feeling angry or exhausted by it.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/26 04:22 PM
7

You claim that it happens regularly, so I’m curious how you explain it.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/26 05:43 AM
4

Why would a wife pressure to do so?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/26 04:47 AM
4

What a way to end to end up having a bunch of kids you didn’t want.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/26 04:22 AM
3

Even more disgusting, great.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/26 04:11 AM
1

What exactly leads to giving up hobbies and friends?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/26 04:02 AM
5

That’s…disgusting and I’m totally pro-choice.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/26 04:01 AM
4

The easiest defense is to spot an opinion or behavior you strongly disagree with. The moment someone says they’re pro-life or religious, it’s like a light bulb goes off.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/26 03:27 AM
–

Your whole post is “there are no women who fit my standards and are willing to date me”, not “there are no good women in the West”. Good is subjective, and your standards are not objectively good for everyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 11:21 PM
–

Terrible texture growing back.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 10:46 PM
–

No, sis, it isn’t worth the trouble.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 09:05 PM
–

I’m afraid what you’re doing is just prolonging the pain.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 08:48 PM
–

Sis, that probably would be illegal.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 08:48 PM
–

What does “threat profiling” mean here?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 08:02 PM
–

That explains it then.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 06:39 PM
–

No, sorry, I was talking about my personal experience. I said I got married a few years ago and he beelined to confession.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 06:39 PM
–

Okay, we can say that sex is important for people and be wary of men who seem to think that threats will help them get some.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 06:38 PM
–

I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do with a confession that expired more than 10 years ago. Like…okay, dude, I’m sure you’ve got over me.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 06:33 PM
1

Again, you’re talking about attraction and not desire. You either can’t see the difference or can’t acknowledge it. Responsive vs spontaneous desire isn’t about dates or attraction, it’s more about sex and who initiates sex more often in an existing relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 06:31 PM
–

She must love getting her nose tickled!
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 06:27 PM
–

Trimmed.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 06:27 PM
–

This is cute, I’m glad you enjoy your girl-powers!
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 06:25 PM
1

Thanks for sharing your experience! It’s probably the way you communicate, but I do hope it’ll get more common and accepted, so it wouldn’t be seen as inherently feminine.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 05:27 PM
1

I’ve never been on a date where I wouldn’t sit next to a person. The point is that those were men from the apps who I thought were at least somewhat attractive. It just didn’t click when we really met.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 04:13 PM
7

If a guy doesn’t want to marry, having a kid won’t change his mind.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 03:48 PM
11

Do you think men don’t want to get married? Why get married then?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 03:47 PM
–

What’s the problem, sis?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 03:34 PM
–

Go with the time, sis.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 03:26 PM
–

Post got deleted. I’ve never been on speed dating events, so I can’t really comment on them, but I’d guess it attracts people struggling with forming romantic relationships, so the success rate is pretty low.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 03:25 PM
2

Most men aren’t aroused 24/7 either, but they defiantly get random “sex would be nice right now” more often than women do.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 03:23 PM
12

This. We got married and it changed nothing about our relationship. We did it for legal reasons.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 01:55 PM
–

To filter through all possible matches. It is questionable, sure, but it’s a fantasy and a fairy tale. I see a lot of comments acknowledging that the same thing in real life would be highly concerning.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 01:50 PM
4

Reactive person still initiates physical touch, and it can lead to getting turned on too. Not all kisses and hugs happen when you’re already in the mood for sex, but a light kiss can turn to a long one and then to something else. Also, it’s a range. Having reactive desire means you usually don’t feel spontaneous desire, but usually doesn’t mean never, and for women it’s usually tied to their cycle.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 01:48 PM
18

I think it’s mostly women who got married and got disappointed in their marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 01:39 PM
–

Do you think an online profiles tells you more than knowing a person in real life?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 01:38 PM
–

When you have no other clues, you’ll filter on the trait you do see. No, I’m talking about smut. It needs some drama because it needs a plot, but the underlined idea is often the undying love and an obsessively loyal partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 01:38 PM
12

If you take into account how social medias work, millions of likes and thousands of comments aren’t…a lot. They show this content to people who are more likely to react, but there are over 100 millions adult women in the US alone, so a few millions of likes doesn’t mean the majority of women actually agree with this content.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 01:36 PM
16

It’s not their asset if it was earned during marriage. And you’re talking about the risk of divorce, most first marriages survive, and divorces hit financially both partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 01:32 PM
–

I have no idea how you manage it with so many people.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 01:31 PM
–

Would you say that a picture gives you less information than a video?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 01:30 PM
55

Couldn’t you say the same about men? A lot of men keep pushing the idea that marriage is something only women want and benefit from, but men keep getting married. In reality, marriage is usually beneficial for both parties. It includes all the usual benefits of an LTR and cohabitation and a bunch of legal benefits and protections for both parties.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 01:29 PM
–

You’re more genuine in real life, and filtered pictures don’t necessarily help with attraction to a real person behind them. It’s not my argument. My argument is that women need more than pictures to feel attraction. A big share of smut is just a fairy tale for adults about your destined soulmate and never ending love.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 01:26 PM
–

*higher on the apps Because a lot of people are prettier and more genuine in real life. They aren’t static, and you can see how they hold themselves. There are more things to notice and potentially like about them.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 01:24 PM
1

Attraction and arousal aren’t the same thing. Attraction is “I like this person and I’d be into them touching me.” Arousal is “I’m turned on right now and want to have sex.” When I went on first dates, I sometimes felt attraction, but not arousal. And honestly even attraction wasn’t a given, especially with dates from apps. Those were pretty much all misses, and I realized online dating just doesn’t work for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 01:22 PM
–

It’s a mix of different factors, and yeah, looks are part of it. I think the bar for “pretty” is lower in real life than it is on apps, because people are often prettier when they’re not stuck in a single photo. You get to see them in motion, how they carry themselves, how they interact. I’m curious, how much smut have you actually read?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 01:10 PM
3

You’re mixing up attraction and desire. You can be attracted to someone and still mainly experience reactive desire. And on the flip side, you can feel little to no attraction but still get turned on out of nowhere and use someone just to get off. There’s a reason men say “a pussy is a pussy.” To answer your question, I’ve gone out with people where I felt a bit of connection. I liked something about them and enjoyed their company, but that initial spark didn’t always turn into anything real. Mo…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 01:07 PM
–

No, it makes sense if you think about it. When you have to rely on visuals only, you’ll raise the standard because all other cues are missing.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 01:00 PM
–

I think most women need more than just a pretty picture to actually feel attraction. Men and women have different sexuality, and even if you look at what kind of porn they consume, you’ll see the difference. Porn for men is very visually-driven with little to no plot. Porn for women is mostly written erotica with no visuals but a plot.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 12:50 PM
8

How is it bargaining if you get turned on from kisses and caressing and not just because you woke up?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 12:24 PM
7

I think spontaneous desire isn’t really tied to your partner. You just get turned on and you want to have sex, but your partner doesn’t even have to be present for that. Of course, if you’re loyal and attracted to them, you’ll seek sex with them, but it’s like eating when you’re hungry vs eating because you really like how this particular food smells or tastes and that made you hungry.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 12:17 PM
27

“Doing basic romantic stuff” triggers reactive desire. Reactive desire isn’t about some grueling work to get your partner turned on, it’s basic romantic things, flirting, and physical touch.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 12:11 PM
3

You do acknowledge that they’re different things. You can feel attraction but don’t often feel spontaneous arousal just because your body is wired this way. As long as you do get turned on with some kissing and touching, it doesn’t mean you aren’t into your partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 12:09 PM
6

Do you think attraction and arousal are the same thing?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 11:54 AM
–

Okay, so if you don’t want women to have sex with me out of pity or obligation, what do you want them to do?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 11:27 AM
–

That doesn’t answer my question.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 11:21 AM
–

Wouldn’t that lead to less sex? Also, a lot of women would rather opt out for surgical sterilization than the risk of pregnancy.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 11:15 AM
–

Sex is great, but it’s an activity for two (or more) consenting adults who want to have sex with each other. Would you prefer women to fuck men out of pity or obligation?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 11:08 AM
–

I think reducing the unnecessary consumption is good enough, and being militant about animal products just scare off people from vegetarian options.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 06:12 AM
–

I’m not a vegetarian, but I also don’t think that vegetarians generally support the idea of euthanizing animals for the sake of reducing meat consumption.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 05:59 AM
–

One could argue that cats and dogs need meat, and if you got your pet from a shelter, this animal would consume its share whether you adopted it or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 05:10 AM
1

Why? As long as you don’t eat your pet’s food, you’re still vegetarian.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 04:36 AM
0

Not if we’re talking about violent crimes. Kinda, if we’re talking about law-abiding citizens.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 12:59 AM
4

To be fair, it varies. Some weeks are pretty chill, and others I barely have any time to function, but it’s lucrative.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 08:05 PM
2

It’s a gamble. The precautions I’ve listed make more sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 07:35 PM
3

No, because a smaller guy can still be stronger.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 06:13 PM
3

It depends on the assault. If you got drugged, their size is completely irrelevant.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 05:37 PM
5

Sexual assault is different from a fist fight. A lot of victims, men and women, freeze involuntarily, some are dragged, some are threatened.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 04:34 PM
7

What? Just because a guy is shorter or skinnier doesn’t mean he’s weak. These guys aren’t necessarily a safer option. A better approach is to meet in public places, keep an eye on your drink, check if he’s on the sex offender registry, and weed out guys who show red flags early on. Height or muscles do not correlate with SA rates.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 04:21 PM
8

I earn more, so I cover a bigger portion of the bills, but we split cooking and cleaning based on our schedule. When I’m working shorter hours, I take on more around the house, and when I’m working long hours, he does more. We want to spend time together. If I expected him to do everything, we wouldn’t have much quality time.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 04:07 PM
4

It makes sense, but ultimately it’s the question of what you value in your relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 03:49 PM
11

Whatever works for you, but I don’t see any reason to just sit around waiting for my partner to come home and handle all the cooking and cleaning, especially if they’re working longer hours than me.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 03:35 PM
12

Role reversal here is a woman working from home, having more free time and no kids, and I’ve done it myself before. A SAHM is usually expected to handle most of the childcare and housework, but depending on how many kids there are and how old they are, she might need extra help. She still needs breaks and days off.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 03:12 PM
8

I wouldn’t have a problem with it as long as he was doing more of the chores and cooking. I work long hours, so splitting things 50/50 doesn’t really make sense if our workloads were so different.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 02:56 PM
19

I never had any trouble abstaining when I was single, but I don’t see a reason to abstain when I’m in a relationship. For most people, marriage usually comes with an active sex life, and men are the first to complain when that’s missing. Sex is an important part of a relationship. I also think that men who struggle to get dates aren’t just looking for sex, they’re looking for a romantic connection. If it was only about sex, paying for it would solve their problem. And pregnancy can result from r…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 01:08 AM
–

Even worse.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 10:21 PM
–

What was it?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 09:03 PM
–

How does it show?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 08:02 PM
–

A person has to be evaluated by medical professionals and then declared legally incapable by a court before they’re considered unable to make their own decisions. Marrying someone who requires a guardian is ethically questionable and probably illegal in some cases.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 06:01 PM
–

Why does it fulfill you?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 05:26 PM
–

It’s not exactly what I’m talking about. It’s more that some guys try to push again or guilt trip you to have sex and then get upset it doesn’t work.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 04:41 PM
–

I’ve experienced it only from the opposite side. Some guys thought that “I don’t have sex without commitment” and “I take things slow” meant “stick for 3 dates and you’ll get a prize”. They were disappointed.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 03:23 PM
–

Do you feel fulfilled?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 03:13 PM
–

Why have you edited the comment?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 01:22 PM
–

I like sneaking unexpected snacks and sweets into his lunch so he gets a little surprise treat during his break. Today it’s a cinnamon bun.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 11:36 AM
–

Does your wife do it?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 11:33 AM
–

Plenty of average guys just want to have sex too, and there are enough people who say they want an LTR, but they’re clearly a bad deal to date long-term.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 02:47 AM
–

Kinda depends on the issue, no? I wouldn’t deal with a BPD or other personality disorders, but mild anxiety is manageable with therapy. I’d trust a person who’s in therapy more than a person who refuses to get any help or acknowledge they have an issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 01:24 AM
3

A lot of men want to have casual with no commitment, and a lot of guys who do want to date long-term aren’t really fit for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 12:22 AM
2

It seems you think all men are just like you are, and your opinion about men is very low. You haven’t addressed any of my points.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 06:58 PM
3

That’s an interesting proposal to isolate guys who can’t date even further.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 06:42 PM
4

Dude, this is not an argument.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 06:41 PM
2

My friends are in relationships, and most of them I met when I was in college. They had years to hit on me and didn’t. Also, if you offer a hookup and they agree, it doesn’t mean they’ve been waiting for it all this time. If my friend offers me a cake, I’ll take it. It doesn’t mean I’m her friend just for cakes.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 06:38 PM
2

If there’s active lying and misleading, they’re somewhat comparable. Quite often a guy is just doing it to himself. Same with a girl who keeps her situationship when the guy has already told her he wants something casual.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 06:08 PM
3

I have enough male friends to disagree.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 06:06 PM
4

When a guy lies about his intentions to get sex, he’s actively lying to get what he wants. So unless a woman leads a guy on by giving hints and signs that she might date him one day, it really isn’t the same thing. Sometimes you have no idea a guy is into you because he has or had a partner, you’ve been friends for years, he hasn’t show any signs and so on.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 05:47 PM
3

I wore what I usually wear. Just jeans and a sweater.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 01:07 PM
1

You haven’t provided any proofs to your claim, and the other person has done all the heavy lifting here. This approach isn’t inherently bad imv, it literally flips the pressure from the accuser to the accused.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 11:07 PM
1

I wouldn’t mind it, but I’m not sure how it could be enforced.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 06:07 PM
8

I’ve tried to explain that attraction and arousal are often things, and it was completely useless.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 01:14 PM
10

Men also confuse desire with love, or even just liking someone, and think it makes them less shallow. Being hornier doesn’t make you a better person.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 01:09 PM
1

If you think it’s immoral, it’s immoral for everyone. If you think casual makes women undateable, you harm people by having it.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 12:35 PM
1

What’s the explanation for men’s emotions?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 05:14 AM
1

Is your wife like that?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 05:09 AM
1

Maybe not when you’re annoyed or upset.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 01:08 AM
1

No, it just doesn’t necessarily cheer you up when you’re down.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 12:37 AM
1

How is it a way to cheer someone up? Instead of asking what happened and listening to them, you’re just fishing for compliments.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/04/26 12:32 AM
2

Thanks! Inexperienced
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 06:03 PM
1

Feminism is for women and about women. Men’s issues are largely out of scope.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 06:00 PM
5

Same with men who are into casual but want to date an inexperienced woman long-term.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 05:59 PM
1

Interesting, I should read their methodology a bit later.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 05:32 PM
2

You can measure the rates.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 05:31 PM
1

My point is specifically that we have data not related to police reports. I’m sorry you went through it, and it makes sense that you hold this opinion. Personal experience doesn’t describe population trends.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 03:11 PM
4

The problem is that the main danger for women is their partners. Statistically, you’re more likely to get assaulted by your partner than your partner having to protect you from someone else.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 03:10 PM
1

Wasn’t it 1 in 3? Can you link the stats?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 03:07 PM
1

We’re debating here, why should I use an AI for that? You’ve made your point, but you seem to be unable to elaborate.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 03:02 PM
2

We have anonymous surveyed that are more reliable than data from police reports, and I think they’re more representative than one’s personal experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 03:01 PM
4

It makes sense, but it also contradicts the idea of me being protectors. The main reason women need protection is men themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 02:59 PM
3

Yes, but we’re talking about the risks. The highest risk for a woman is her own partner which is ridiculous.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 02:39 PM
3

They’re a minority, but a very loud and aggressive one.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 02:39 PM
4

No, girl, statistically most people are not abusive nor have been abused. Don’t dilute abuse to minor inconvenience.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 02:16 PM
6

To be fair, most men aren’t abusive or murderous.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 01:57 PM
9

The issue is that men protect women from other men, but the person who’s more likely to abuse or kill you is your own partner who’s also “supposed to be” the one protecting you according to our traditional gender roles. This whole problem seems like “create an issue so you could solve it and get praised” when we’re talking about a whole gender and not just individuals.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 01:49 PM
1

I think the begging part is about guys struggling with getting any dates. If you don’t really have options and you detest being single, you probably aren’t going to be picky.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 01:36 PM
1

I hope you’re joking.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 01:16 PM
2

He keeps putting off going to the doctor until I get worried when he mentions something’s bothering him for weeks, so I end up making the appointment for him. I wish he’d just cut certain people off when they upset him, but instead he keeps trying to make things work and just ends up getting hurt. Sometimes he gets the urge to reorganize our kitchen drawers or our clothes, and then I can’t find anything for days.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/26 04:24 AM
2

That’s not an answer to my question.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 07:40 PM
–

I disagree with the message. A working partner has lower risks compared to a partner staying home. They don’t lose working experience and don’t get huge gaps in their resume, but they lose on family time and seeing their kids. I’d prefer to be the working partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 06:15 PM
2

They said it isn’t gendered.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 06:11 PM
1

What claims do feminist make with this justification?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 06:10 PM
1

No, you’re saying that there’s a demographic that women should avoid. What demographic is it? There are anonymous surveys.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 06:10 PM
1

What is this demographic you’re talking about? It happens to men too, but the rate is lower. It’s also far rarer for men to get harassed by other men.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 02:55 PM
2

I wonder whether it works the same way if the perpetrator is a woman?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 02:21 PM
0

You can decrease your risks of DV if you know the signs. It’s better to look at his dating history, check him in the register, and be actively aware of the signs of abuse rather than base it purely on demographics. You can’t do much about sexual harassment from strangers, especially when we’re talking about minors. I’ve never dated a violent man, but I’ve been sexually harassed by strangers and by a relative.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 02:19 PM
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Why is it hard to imagine? Performing oral isn’t degrading by default. It is degrading if you and your partner see it this way or they’re demanding and disrespectful about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 02:14 PM
1

That’s an interesting approach, and it’s the first time I’ve heard about it. Thanks for taking your time to explain! Are there any stats on the percent of accused getting jailed?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 01:18 PM
3

I’m not sure what your point is here.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 12:07 PM
4

It’s illegal yet most rapists don’t end up jailed. We have to strive for a better world, but I don’t think it’s realistic that we’d be able to eliminate the danger. Most women have experienced sexual harassment, and a lot of them have been harassed as kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 11:38 AM
9

I agree that this doesn’t seem to be egalitarian. I see the point in prioritizing children, but I think it should be children and financially disadvantaged. The OP claims that a man would get jailed based on a woman’s word, and I wonder whether it’s anywhere close to reality considering that in the US most men accused in rape don’t really get any legal consequences.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 11:07 AM
4

If we could somehow remove the risks that come from women generally being physically weaker and more sexually desired, while men being stronger and more aggressive, then being more desired might actually feel like an advantage. But that’s a huge and unrealistic “if.” I don’t think those risks can really be eliminated completely. They’re deeply tied to gender roles and the way society is structured, and maybe even to biology. As things stand, being more desired comes with significant downsides, a…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 11:04 AM
2

Do you have to pretend? I think 5’10 hits the sweet spot.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 06:17 AM
1

He makes claims that he wants us to justify or argue against, so he should prove his claims first.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 06:15 AM
–

A lot of old “romantic” movies didn’t age well. Sleepless in Seattle, the Notebook and so on. For some reason, plot writers decided that cheating was romantic
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 01:50 AM
10

I’m curious to see any proofs of your claims.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 01:38 AM
–

What does it mean?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 01:37 AM
–

I’ve seen what purity culture does to people, and there are also studies in the topic. Just to clarify, I’m not taking about individuals choosing to wait, but about the religious practice and culture around it. Although the intent of this movement claims to provide moral structure, research related to the main objectives reveal that they also created a negative effect on females that result in physical, emotional, and sexual dysfunction and dissatisfaction. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/345560…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 01:36 AM
–

What if the issue not in “not desirable enough”, but because your best sex was with a completely not suitable for an LTR partner? Some men claim that BPD women are best at sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/04/26 01:32 AM
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There’s no guarantee, but if you have sex before marriage, you can at least check that you’re compatible. Purity culture is poison, and it ruins sex for a lot of women.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 11:01 PM
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Some guys and their best sex with women they’d never date long-term. Are they supposed to stay single forever?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 10:59 PM
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That wasn’t the question.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 08:05 PM
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No. If you can’t live up your ideal, you don’t get to preach it to others.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 06:19 PM
–

It would be if smoking wasn’t harmful.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 06:16 PM
–

Do you marry for best orgasm?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 06:16 PM
–

If you’re stuffing your face while trying to starve others, you’re a hypocrite. Crossdressing while being a homophobe is insane.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 05:41 PM
–

At this point I’m starting to think that repression is a kink for them.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 04:08 PM
–

I’ve seen several posts from religious guys admitting they’re avid porn watchers and have a problem with their boring sex because their wives are absolutely not into it.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 03:55 PM
4

I think religious men waiting for marriage and supporting purity culture shouldn’t complain about their boring and unfulfilling sex life. You can’t shame women for having sexual desire and then expect them to jump your bones.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 03:45 PM
9

Every human interaction is transactional in some way, because it always involves an exchange of something. Even a simple conversation is still an exchange. That doesn’t take away from the value of the bonds you share with the people you love.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 02:53 PM
4

This is a delusion, and if you keep thinking about it all the time, you might benefit from reading about OCD.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 02:47 PM
3

If we frame it this way, sure. Everything got commodified because valuable has become the same as “profitable”.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 02:42 PM
4

It’s both sad and a little ironic watching guys shoot themselves in the foot by refusing to deal with mental health issues, especially when they’d probably have no trouble dating or having sex if they got treated.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 02:41 PM
1

He’s just jealous.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 02:39 PM
1

It really depends on how mature the guy is. Some will get offended just by being rejected, while others will keep pushing until you’re forced to hit them with a brutally blunt “not even if you were the last man on earth” type of response. I also kind of laugh at guys saying women should just be more honest and give a real reason. Try telling a guy he’s too neurotic to date, or that you’re not interested in dating someone religious, and see how fast he gets offended and starts trying to argue you…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 02:28 PM
8

I think capitalism plays a role, but it’s not the main driver. Unless you count things like dating apps, social media, and endless at-home entertainment as outcomes of capitalism. It definitely contributes to the problem. Our work-life balance is awful. People aren’t exactly into dating when they’re burned out, and money issues are a common divorce reason. I think the biggest drivers are the rise of hyper-individualism, the decline of community, kids spending way less time socializing and buildi…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 02:23 PM
2

Here we’re taking about women being privileged as a group.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 11:23 PM
1

Is this projection? Do you think men compare themselves to more handsome men?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 11:13 PM
0

Those saying “no” don’t necessarily compare themselves to prettier women.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 10:41 PM
2

Again, I think either men or women as a group are more privileged. The wealthy are privileged, not your average folks struggling to make the ends meet.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 10:24 PM
6

You could at least read the replies here before talking nonsense.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 09:47 PM
0

I always preferred to date exclusively. How much time do you have to date multiple people at the same time?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 09:38 PM
3

Your post is a bit hard to follow, but I think you’re asking “what privileges do you notice you have?” or “why don’t you notice your privilege?” If it’s the first, women often have an easier time getting support in cases of domestic or sexual violence. Not that it’s easy, but generally easier than for men. They also tend to have an advantage in custody cases. People usually see women as less threatening, which makes it easier to get help, meet people, and form connections. In dating, women have …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 09:37 PM
0

Girl gets bankrolled by her casual lays. I’m curious how it’s different from sugaring arrangement.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 08:19 PM
1

If I were interested in getting “financially compensated” for dating a guy, I’d go the sugar baby route, not marriage. I avoided casual relationships because I want a partner to build a life with, not just short-lived relationships. No shade to women who are into casual. Just different priorities.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 08:10 PM
1

There weren’t many of them, and they turned out pretty much how you’d expect. By “boy-obsessed,” I mean they had really messy dating lives and were clearly looking for validation from guys. That usually doesn’t lead to healthy relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 08:06 PM
2

Still, most of them being divorce single mothers is an interesting statistics. A few of my classmates are single mothers, but they tend to be girls who were mostly boys-obsessed girls, often coming from unstable home environments, so it’s not really surprising.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 07:43 PM
3

Do you mean that all girls who were avoiding guys in high school are single mothers now? I’m curious what your socioeconomic background is considering that most women are not single mothers.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 07:32 PM
1

This is sweet. I can understand the idea of “gender disappointment” that some people experience, but I was really put off by my colleague mourning his “son” when he found out his second child was going to be another daughter.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 06:41 PM
3

It’s time for spring cleaning.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 06:30 PM
2

Congrats!
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 03:29 PM
5

People with clinical depression need professional help.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 03:29 PM
2

Yeah, I don’t need a guy to be a feminist, but he should at least be somewhat supportive and pro-choice. I try to avoid misogynists and pro-lifers, but it isn’t always possible because I work with all kinds of people.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 02:40 PM
10

I think men have a tougher time getting matches and dates, and I do feel for guys who are struggling to find a partner when they really want one. But I don’t have much sympathy for guys complaining about not getting casual sex. I also don’t think it’s fair to lump all single men in with incels. That said, if someone is being hateful, they can’t really expect others to feel sorry for them. Decent guys don’t deserve the hate, and I think we all could benefit from being nicer to each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 02:32 AM
3

The Handmaiden was also a chef’s kiss.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 02:28 AM
4

I’m married, so I don’t have to deal with the current dating scene firsthand. I know a few women who’ve chosen to step away from dating, and they seem pretty content with that decision. Some just don’t feel the desire or need for a partner, and others have had bad experiences they don’t want to go through again. My single friends who are still open to dating might go on a date every month or two, but it usually doesn’t lead anywhere. Their dates are rarely horrible, but people are flaky and they…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 04:38 PM
–

You talk about it as if it was a strategic decision. Women just are more comfortable being single. I also don’t really see current dating market as some winning. From what I see, it seems both genders are losing in the long run.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 03:55 PM
–

Men’s dating frustrations often center on the idea that women can have casual sex with “top-tier” guys and won’t date men at their own level. There’s this belief that all women are chasing the same top 20% of men, but if that were really true, how would those guys even have the time or interest to juggle that many women? And if they stopped casually dating, would that actually open up more opportunities for other men? A lot of men seem to expect women to show more restraint than they expect from…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 03:49 PM
–

We go on dates, but I think we graduated from dating to marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 02:32 PM
–

I was really lucky to meet my husband, so yeah, I’m happy with my dating life.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 06:41 AM
6

I agree that a person with fewer options won’t be easily love you more. So the idea that struggling guys would deeply love a woman who gave them a chance is pretty silly.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 01:04 AM
6

Not all of them, but guys who talk the most shit have been chronically single for quite some time.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 01:02 AM
2

Do you know the difference between “family” and “generation”?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/26 10:58 PM
2

I don’t believe in some magic intuiting, but I do think that a lot of people just straight tell on themselves. There is some “initiation” where you feel that something is off but you can’t pinpoint it, but it isn’t something I’d personally rely on.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/26 07:00 PM
5

Look up Duggar family.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/26 03:22 PM
5

I’d say my friends and I are doing much better better than our parents’ generation.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/26 03:21 PM
3

It’s really not dating podcast material.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/26 12:54 PM
4

I think women who are content with their relationship and have been with one partner for years just don’t have interesting content on the topic. Ask me how my dating life is going, and it’s been the same for years.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/26 12:47 PM
1

You can spend time and have deep platonic relationships with me too. The OP has guarded himself from both genders.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/26 12:41 PM
4

The problem is that there’s no estimate. It just doesn’t exist.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/26 12:34 PM
4

Dude, it doesn’t work this way. I’ve never been with a lot of people in the first place, so I have no idea. When I look at people around me, I really really don’t think “would I”.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/26 04:37 AM
6

It would depend on the body, right? It would definitely take some time to get used to a new look. I wouldn't care if he suddenly became a woman since I'm bi, but I can't really give you a “percentage” of bodies I’m into. I don't usually find strangers sexually attractive anyway, I just don't think about people that way when I'm in a relationship. Other people’s bodies aren't sexual objects to me. I would at least try to get into my partner’s new body.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/26 04:32 AM
5

“When are you going for the second one?”
/r/PurplePillDebate30/03/26 01:55 AM
8

I can imagine that having sex that you don’t want will make you lose your libido.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 11:41 PM
5

Some guys are just looking for sex, and unless you’re into something casual too, dealing with them is just a waste of your time. I’ve also tried this dynamic with my husband, and for him there’s really no such thing as “too much sex” or even “enough sex.” He’s not the kind of guy who’s only after sex, but he’s definitely more than happy to have it multiple times a day, every day. The thing is, it takes time, so we end up doing less of other things. That can be nice for a change, but I still like…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 11:40 PM
–

I don’t think messy people necessarily have mental disorders. Some of them are just messy. I do agree that women need healthy ways to deal with their neuroticism.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 10:22 PM
2

What? I like attention from him because I’m into him.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 10:21 PM
6

I’m not talking about some deep initiation here, am I?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 09:25 PM
4

A few.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 09:24 PM
1

I like sexual attention from my husband but not other people.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 09:23 PM
–

My friend’s mother kicked her out. She sent her to study and just didn’t help her financially at all even when her daughter was starving. I used to cook extra just to invite her because “silly me, I cooked too much again.”
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 07:42 PM
4

Lesbians have higher DV victimization, but the stats includes victimization by male and female partners. Some lesbians did try dating men. I’m not sure what DV has to do with random creeps though. I’m talking more about sexual harassment, not DV. I’m not saying it’s his personal failing, but it isn’t a compliment. Edit: I think bi women have the highest rate.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 07:33 PM
2

They’re different from having a pet or a kid, but you do bond with your pets and kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 07:05 PM
3

I’m bi, but I appreciate women’s attention more because it isn’t threatening and it’s usually platonic. They can appreciate the efforts put into an outfit without wanting to fuck me.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 07:04 PM
7

I’ll just say that it’s 90% men and it’s an office job.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 06:26 PM
1

Both in public and at home. I think some people like showing off how attractive their partner is.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 06:15 PM
6

Tbf I appreciate women looking at me more than men.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 06:14 PM
4

Sure, but I don’t think that a lot of people break yo because if a cat or a dog.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 06:11 PM
11

In other words, you think that having any responsibility is detrimental for relationships. The issue is that a committed relationship itself is a responsibility. Also, if my husband didn’t want to have any pets, we just wouldn’t be compatible.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 06:02 PM
3

I like to dress up when I go out because it makes me feel pretty. It’s usually when I’m out with my husband, but I also enjoy getting dressed up for my girlfriends, they always notice my outfits and hair, which is fun. Most of my clothes aren’t very revealing, just because that’s not really my style. My style has changed a bit since my husband and I got together, but it’s more about my own taste evolving. I’ve started leaning into a more feminine look outside of work. I didn’t even dress up that…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 05:08 PM
14

You underestimate how many people just straight tell on themselves. I work mostly with guys, and it doesn’t take a lot for them to start sharing their views on women.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 04:41 PM
12

I can only speak from my own experience, but what I do for my husband is totally different from what I did with my first boyfriend. I do way more for my husband. I think that comes from knowing my body better, trusting him more, the fact that he’s a much more attentive and generous lover, and that I’m not as shy anymore, I can actually communicate what I want. Plus, we share some kinks. My first serious partner was pretty bad in bed. He was inexperienced, which is fine, but he either couldn’t or…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 04:36 PM
–

I’ve dated just one girl, and it was great until she decided to go poly.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 04:28 PM
–

And this is perfectly fine! Not all people are cut out for relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 04:14 PM
–

I’m not saying it will crumble in 100%, but there are enough stories where a wife just stops doing all chores, and their home turns into a pigsty. It usually ends up in a divorce.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 04:13 PM
–

Suit yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 03:08 PM
–

Or everything will crumble, and she’ll see that this relationship is hopeless.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 03:06 PM
–

Some men are just pigs. The goal here is to avoid them.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 01:36 PM
–

More women should learn to stop giving a fuck. If he doesn’t wash the dishes, he should eat from dirty plates. That’s it.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 01:14 PM
2

This is not exactly an answer to my question.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 03:25 AM
2

Okay, how would you differentiate between the pills?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/03/26 01:00 AM
7

No, you aren’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/26 09:11 PM
0

What do you mean by marginalized?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/26 08:25 PM
2

Do you really want to say that nobody claims that? Because there are subreddits where lots of guys claim exactly this.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/26 08:23 PM
0

Reddit has popped up a bunch of incel subreddits recently.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/26 06:41 PM
1

Communities not plagued by incels?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/26 06:15 PM
6

Most people don’t share your obsession and insecurity.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/26 04:48 PM
2

This topic brings incels contaminating subreddits. I guess moderators don’t want to go through heaps of comments and posts violating rules, so they just ban it altogether. You reap what you sow.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/26 04:47 PM
2

Know what?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/26 03:06 PM
2

Blue pill is an umbrella term. I’m sure some people do say them, but I see red and black pillers claiming that people say the more often than actually people saying these things.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/26 02:31 PM
6

I don’t think that further culling our DNA pool is a good idea.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/26 05:12 AM
1

How tall are you?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/03/26 05:11 AM
-3

Black pill = appearance is the only thing that matters and optionally women are terrible human beings. I disagree with these points as well
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 11:24 PM
1

I mean, can you give a definition of “family”.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 09:32 PM
1

I think the main point is that women who avoid shitty men also tend to avoid men who complain about women going for bad guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 09:29 PM
6

I was thinking about points that red and black pilled people bring up as “blue pill opinions”. I don’t think they give it a correct representation.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 08:17 PM
14

I think “fault” implies the result of your own actions that you can control. Being ND isn’t something you can control.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 07:44 PM
1

What is a family to you?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 07:43 PM
11

Most women can find a guy who wants to fuck them, but it doesn’t mean they can easily find a decent LTR partner. If it’s hard to be around you, you don’t bring enough value, or you have very low tolerance for your partner, you’ll struggle with fondness one.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 06:39 PM
2

Toxic femininity/masculinity is about behavior, not industry. Promote it. Use it in your speech.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 06:36 PM
36

I wonder why you stopped replying to your other post when I brought up the stats. Things that are assigned to blue pill by black and red pillars and I disagree with: There’s someone for everyone. No, some people are out of luck. If you struggle with dating, it’s your fault/you hate women/something in these lines. Some men struggle because they’re ND, they have low social skills, they’re depressed and so on. It doesn’t make them bad people by default. Just world fallacy. You can be a good person,…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 06:34 PM
1

Why? You could have kids without having a spouse.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 06:18 PM
1

Industry itself isn’t toxic femininity. If a woman pushed other women to follow bursary standards by shaming them, this is an example of toxic femininity. Do you see the difference?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 06:17 PM
1

It doesn’t make sense to call it internalized femininity because it affects both genders, and men have been struggling more and more with their beauty standards as well. Toxic masculinity describes aspects of traditional masculinity that are harmful to men and others.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 04:14 PM
2

I don’t think beauty standards are even called internalized misogyny. It’s just lookism mixed with sexism. Toxic femininity is more about relying on your gender role in a way that is harmful both to you and people around you.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 04:06 PM
1

Words have meanings. I think social status means your place in the society. How others view and respect you. Doctors have higher social status than people working trades. A priest used to have a higher status than a civilian.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 03:54 PM
2

If you disagree with the term, do you disagree with the concept itself? Also, I don’t think internalized misandry describes situations where men hate women or view them inferior.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 03:51 PM
1

If we’re talking about averages, women you’re describing aren’t average. Edge cases exist, sure, but most college educated, mentally stable, well rounded women do not date terrible men.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 03:49 PM
10

Some guys would date and have sex with any woman willing to tolerate them. They don’t even have to like her or find her attractive, but they want her see them as her best shot out there for some reason. Guys complaining about women choosing awful partners ignore all women in stable relationships. I guess if you base your worldview on social media, it’s easy to miss people happy with their relationships because they’re largely invisible online.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 02:41 PM
3

Hypergamy = women end to date and marry partners with higher economic, social, or education level. What you’re describing is women’s sexuality, not hypergamy.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 02:36 PM
2

I have no idea why you think that the fact rooted in our biology makes you think I’m naive. People can be terrible. It doesn’t cancel our socks needs.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 02:33 PM
1

There were a few posts exposing some content creators who claimed that women in the pictures were their girlfriends - they were paid models/sex workers. I’m sure videos with “let him check your phone on camera” where all girls are cheating just don’t show all boring loyal couples.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 02:09 PM
1

Women care about looks, but they need more than appearance to feel attraction.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 02:02 PM
1

A good share of content about dating and gender issues is manufactured to be a ragebait, but it’s shown as if it was genuine, not staged, and not involving people who got paid or chosen specifically to be rage inducing. So, yeah, the content creators are grifters.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 02:01 PM
1

Forgive as “I don’t wish bad things on you, and I’m not angry with you anymore”, but I can’t stay with a person I can’t trust.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 01:49 PM
1

Most likely. Maybe if we had kids, we could keep living together, but we wouldn’t be a couple anymore.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 01:47 PM
1

Do you think family makes sense only if you have a spouse?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 01:46 PM
1

My main point here is that your advice isn’t going to work for a lot of men out there.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 01:46 PM
2

People in terrible situations often rely on their friends and family even more. We are social and tribal.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 01:45 PM
1

We are social animals.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 04:35 AM
2

This isn’t the way most people want to live. Social needs don’t just go away.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 04:16 AM
2

Human beings are social species, so I don’t think it’s a defect. We crave human connection.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 04:15 AM
3

Why do you think I’m talking about women?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 04:14 AM
4

Sure, but if you have friends who you can talk to, it can help you feel less lonely.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 04:14 AM
3

Forgive? Maybe. Stay with him? No
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 04:11 AM
2

Got it, thanks.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 04:10 AM
2

Because there are lots of older men who are not bald.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 03:01 AM
3

This is not romance, he is an old creep.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 02:58 AM
9

If you don’t feel the need for human connection, I don’t think you can relate to people who do feel lonely.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 02:53 AM
5

Poor girl.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 02:49 AM
20

You’re fine with sex work and shutting up, but a lot of men struggle with loneliness. Just staying quiet and paying for sex won’t make the loneliness go away.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 02:42 AM
2

That’s why I used cougar.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 02:27 AM
1

I know, but what’s an appropriate female equivalent for a sugar daddy?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 02:23 AM
4

Did I say “exclusively”?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 11:09 PM
9

Here’s for antisocial behavior https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/9670593/
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 09:46 PM
7

Here’s for substance: Different-sex and same-sex partners tend to be concordant for substance use. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S2352250X18302720?utm_source=chatgpt.com
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 09:44 PM
7

If you want, you can try to address my points and make it more coherent.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 09:35 PM
8

Again, “blue pill” is basically an umbrella term for anyone who isn’t red or blackpilled. So yeah, of course there are contradictions. It includes a wide range of people, and they can have completely different beliefs and values. Also, even if you look at just one person, you’ll usually find some contradictions in their worldview. That’s just how people are. Unless you actively try to identify and work through those inconsistencies, it’s easy to end up holding views that don’t really line up. So…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 09:29 PM
3

Am I my husband’s cougar?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 09:11 PM
4

It makes sense. I’m sorry you’re dealing with all of this, and I wish things were more accessible and reasonable.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 08:30 PM
25

Maybe, but tbh I don’t want to deal with issues tied to transition. I admit that I’m widely unaware and unprepared to deal with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 03:30 PM
–

Women in male dominated fields! On a serious note, yeah, some women hate men. Some women also just mirror comments men leave about women.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 02:34 PM
5

So it isn’t just appearance, is it?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 08:05 PM
–

I faked it with my first partner because he was awful and hopeless at it, and I just wanted it to end.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 05:20 PM
–

That’s because most people are glad they didn’t marry their first partner. Not just feminists.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 03:25 PM
–

You’ve got a whole hour, jelly! I hope you’ll feel better.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 03:24 PM
–

I’m usually on the opposite side of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 03:24 PM
5

This is not an accusation.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 02:30 PM
–

Some people see love as ownership, so they wish their partner could never move on and be happy without them. It shows that they care about themselves and their ego far more than they care about their partner. Very selfish and childish attitude.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 01:36 PM
6

I don’t know. I’m not sure I’d be able to cope in a healthy way in the first place, and you’re poking to get an answer that soothes your insecurity or makes you feel worse.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 01:35 PM
–

Did you not love them that you replaced them with your wife? Do you see your wife as a replacement?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 01:27 PM
–

Thats probably the issue. Have you ever dated someone seriously besides your wife?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 01:25 PM
–

Dating someone else doesn’t mean she replaced you unless you think that each partner plays exactly the same role.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 01:23 PM
–

Can’t she find strength in this love and keep living with memories about you?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 01:20 PM
6

By moving on I mean being able to continue living as a functioning adult, not necessarily dating around
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 01:11 PM
6

Have no idea how I’d deal with it and no idea how I could get over it. It’s be easier if we had kids because I would have to move on and keep being a reliable adult for them.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 01:09 PM
–

Would you prefer her to live a miserable life never being able to move on? Idk, it sounds almost narcissistic.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 01:03 PM
4

We’ve been together for almost 10 years now, I have no idea how I’d deal with it and manage to continue functioning. I can’t give you any time frame. I think if we had kids at that moment, I’d avoid dating for sure because I wouldn’t want to introduce someone new to kids. On a flip side, if I dropped dead right now, I’d prefer husband to date again. We’re too young for him to stay celibate.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 01:02 PM
3

A few guys have complained about this at some point in real time. Most of them meant they were lonely in a romantic sense, though, since they didn’t really like my suggestions to reconnect with friends and family.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 12:24 AM
3

You wish.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 12:23 AM
1

I think more men cheat just to have variety, and it isn’t any better than cheating to upgrade. In a way, it’s worse because you’re wasting everyone’s time.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 12:21 AM
–

Blue pill isn’t “pro-women.” It’s more of a catch-all term for anyone who isn’t red or blackpilled. Feminism doesn’t really mean supporting all women either. If it did, it would include women who are anti-choice or even those who think women shouldn’t have the right to vote. Feminism is about women’s rights, not just supporting every woman no matter what she believes or does. And I don’t automatically defend or coddle women just because I’m blue-pilled or a feminist. I call out women in my own l…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 12:20 AM
3

You can’t know for sure, but you can get a pretty good idea by paying attention to their behavior and how consistent they are. Some people seriously underestimate the value of long-term relationships. When you’ve spent years together, you grow together, and at some point your partner becomes a constant in your life even when everything else changes.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 08:05 PM
6

What if you’ve never failed?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 08:01 PM
6

Waiting to have sex helps filter out most guys who are just looking for something casual. Asking about his long-term goals and past relationships also can help, but one of the safest bets is dating within your social circle. I met my husband through a friend, and since she’d known him for a while, I didn’t have to worry about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 08:00 PM
2

I wouldn’t say it’s a war zone, but it was a waste of time for me. My friends have shared some horror stories though.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 04:06 PM
1

My friends avoid dinner first dates because it’s awkward and completely unnecessary. You should vet women to go out with.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 04:02 PM
1

A woman has to behave “masculine” in certain scenarios because masculinity is valued more and it’s more profitable.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 04:02 PM
6

Both roles are enforced socially and individually.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 02:47 AM
6

Faked personality isn’t something special. Anyone can do it if they have access to a computer, and you do need a computer and skills to have an OF page anyway. At this point, you’re just deflecting, and you stopped replying to me when I brought up other arguments.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 02:28 AM
2

Men should make salads too. Colon cancer is no joke.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 02:05 AM
1

No.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 02:04 AM
4

So men have the opportunity to fake being a woman and make money this way.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 01:38 AM
3

I got home today to steak and homemade banana muffins. I’m so happy.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 01:38 AM
7

According to you, what counts is having this opportunity in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 01:33 AM
4

I mean, no hookups for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 01:32 AM
9

Why would you need that for it to be true? No one stops a man from creating a fake persona and opening an OF, and he doesn’t need to have a certain proportion of fake women online to do so.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 12:47 AM
6

No hookups. At this point I think that too many men just don’t deserve this level of trust so early.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 12:41 AM
16

Prostitution is also a choice. Far more people have children than perform any kind of sex work. From the other hand, periods are not a choice, and for a lot of women it means they’re in pain a few days a month - it’s something men don’t have to deal with. Women’s “sexual power” comes with higher sexual victimization rates. A lot of women have experienced sexual harassment as minors, and more women have been sexually assaulted than men.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 12:37 AM
11

You’re putting everything together, so I’m addressing the point about prostitution in particular. Claiming that it makes women’s lives easier when most women have never done it is ridiculous. You should find an argument that applies to >50% of women out there. Your argument about men paying for dates makes more sense, but I’m not sure it adds much to women having it easier. Also, I could argue that no (cis) man ever has had to give birth to have a kid, so men have it easier.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 12:25 AM
21

I did read your post, and I think it’s bullshit. Sex work isn’t an easy or safe option, it’s terrible to most women involved. Also, how an average woman has it easier when she is not involved in any sex work in the first place?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 12:18 AM
31

Just because you think it's an option doesn't mean the vast majority of women see it as a viable way to live, or that having this “option” makes their lives any easier. Sex work isn't a gold mine, sex workers have terrible suicide rate and rates for sexual victimization. Also, if you’re not even doing it, how is your life any easier just because you could be selling your body? Make it make sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 12:09 AM
23

If he’s meeting my needs, I don't care if he’s not doing the exact same stuff he did for his ex. What actually matters to me is that he didn’t abuse or cheat on her. If he doesn’t fulfill my needs, then we’re just not a match. It’s not about his ex. I don't know why guys struggle to wrap their heads around it.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/26 08:59 PM
8

Statistically, men make more than women, and women are the ones who have to take break from work to have kids. It leads to men outearning women on average, but it doesn’t mean women despise men who make less than they do.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/26 08:52 PM
1

If I make enough money, and he’s willing to take care of kids and household, sure, why not? I don’t know what you mean by “treating him as a masculine man”. If you mean “let him lead” and whatnot, no, as I’m not into gender roles. We don’t have this dynamic with two of us working either. He can be a househusband, and I’ll still respect him, but none of us is a leader with power over the other.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/26 08:51 PM
2

I wouldn’t be happy in either case. Sex and romance are tied together for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/26 05:28 PM
1

I think people had more unplanned kids, so it wasn’t exactly a conscious choice.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/26 02:51 PM
1

I’m curious how old you are and where you’re from because I don’t think this advise has been popular in my generation at all
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/26 01:24 PM
3

Who cares?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/26 04:31 AM
1

This is such a bizarre thing to ask. Do you think it doesn’t count if they aren’t dating a “popular girl”?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/03/26 12:22 AM
3

A lot of bullied boys probably turn out fine even if they have more issues than their non-bullied peers. I’d guess the vast majority of them have normal dating lives.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 10:05 PM
2

Let’s say you’re average for your age group.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 06:44 PM
2

I think some married couples would divorce if they could actually live separately.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 06:44 PM
3

My bad, but can’t you imagine what kind of a guy you’d go for as a woman?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 06:25 PM
5

The question is what kind of a man you’d you’d go for, not whether you’d go for yourself as a man.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 05:56 PM
6

The question is what kind of a man you’d get, not whether you’d date yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 05:47 PM
1

What is risk-taking about dates in an LTR? Most women complaining about a lack of romance probably would be satisfied with a booked table in their favorite spot. Flowers are cheap. You can cook dinner and light candles.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 05:04 PM
1

Would you be happy if sex just stopped at some point?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 04:59 PM
7

A lot of kinks form before you even gain any experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 04:56 PM
1

It is not, and most me over 30 aren’t virgins.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 02:00 PM
3

Dates don’t have to be expensive. Prepare snacks and go for a picnic.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 01:59 PM
0

It’s a two-way street, and you can’t just stop putting in the effort without your relationship taking a hit. It’s just like sex. It’s necessary for a good romantic relationship, you’re supposed to enjoy it, and you have to prioritize your time in the bedroom to keep things moving. It’s totally fine if you have a few crazy weeks, but if your partner can’t deal with your schedule for a bit, you either need to be clear about your stress, they’ve have to adjust, or they’ve probably been feeling negl…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 01:58 PM
1

Sure, it depends on the person, but not everyone is just here to shit on others. I think some people take any kind of debate or disagreement personally, so they villainize anyone they don't agree with by default.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 05:37 AM
3

Been together 10 years. We go daily or more when we can, but when we both have insane working hours, it’s a few times a week plus some bjs in between. It’s a compromise. He’d love to go at it multiple times a day, every day, but between work and everything else, I just can't keep up that pace.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 04:31 AM
2

Wait, how old are you? I’ve never heard most of what you’ve listed. Aside from the bit about not dating way younger people, I’ve never advised any of this stuff.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 04:27 AM
8

The man spread deep fake porn with his wife. What the hell? He did it because “she’s his wife and he can control who he offers her sexually”? The dude should rot in jail.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 03:10 AM
3

10 minutes? What?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 03:02 AM
4

I don’t understand what you’re saying.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 03:01 AM
4

What did you start doing?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 02:59 AM
3

What?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 02:59 AM
4

A lot of men here struggle with dating, so what they’re doing doesn’t work for them.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 01:16 AM
4

I can’t speak for other men, but my husband has a high libido, even compared to other men. That said, a high libido doesn’t mean promiscuous behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 01:13 AM
2

Women score higher in neuroticism, but I think men online are even more insecure and neurotic.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 01:12 AM
5

A good number of women here are in relationships, so we’ve clearly been able to find men who are attracted to us and who show the behavior we’re into.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 01:02 AM
1

Can you tell me which insecurity I project onto other people? And yes, this advice applies to everyone, regardless of gender.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 12:58 AM
1

Noo, girl, you aren’t tweaking. It’s one thing if he was this way towards everyone, some people are, but it seems he gave you more attention than he gave to his date.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 12:57 AM
7

No, I mostly don’t care. As long as he respects my “no” the first time, doesn’t smell, doesn’t try to touch me or keep pushing, doesn’t look mentally unstable, I’m fine with being approached.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/03/26 12:53 AM
2

Snakes are awesome, I’d get one if my husband was okay with it. What did his bestie say? My husband had to cut off one of his friends for hitting on me early on in our relationship. Men love to talk shit about women friendships, but I feel guys pull this shit way more often.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/26 10:20 PM
6

This family is fucked up.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/26 09:18 PM
1

Exactly this. When people complain and do nothing about their situation, it really rubs me the wrong way.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/26 07:11 PM
4

Dear, you should stop shoving your own insecurity into other people’s faces.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/26 07:10 PM
1

What if you’re old yourself?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/26 05:26 PM
1

He’s 5’10 and I’m all over him, but he's not a model or anything. Most guys I see dating aren’t really above 6 feet models.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/26 05:26 PM
1

Who said it isn’t?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/26 04:31 PM
3

Idk husband is pretty blue-pilled, and he’s a happy family man.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/26 02:08 PM
1

It’s curious to see how men are disgusted with the idea of dating someone older or even their own age.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/26 02:07 PM
3

I’m curious what that means in this context. Does “not the first choice” mean the guys were just orbiting them? Or does it just mean guys they met later on? I feel like if your partner is settling for you because they think they could’ve done better, it’s dead obvious. Usually, it’s just that the spark fades over time and people stop putting in the effort whether they were each other’s first choice or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/26 02:06 PM
1

Husband calls me his goddess sometimes. Fortunately, he’s not Christian.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/26 04:03 AM
1

I guess it’s the average, but it’s confusing. Debt?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/26 12:52 AM
2

I know, but I’m asking a specific user about his views.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 10:35 PM
1

That’s stats for single people
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 10:34 PM
3

You said a woman should be grateful, didn’t you?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 10:25 PM
2

Okay, so why is it different from a man cheating on a woman?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 10:23 PM
1

Would he be good enough if a woman just settled for him because she didn’t have options?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 10:23 PM
2

Not what I’m asking about.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 10:22 PM
1

Whatever you “know” about yourself isn’t necessary true. If you think promiscuous behavior is detrimental for marriage, it’s detrimental for both genders.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 10:08 PM
8

Should a man be grateful for being cheated on?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 10:07 PM
1

In one month, the average single American male consumer spends $3,847 or 98.1% of his income after taxes. The average single female spends $3,736 in one month or 116.9% of her income after taxes. https://capitaloneshopping.com/research/male-vs-female-shopping-statistics/
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 10:07 PM
1

Why is it much harder to get over?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 10:03 PM
2

You need money to pay for housing, food, and most basic necessities. This user ruminates not just about sex itself, but the number of options. Women were always more desirable, so why is it such a problem now?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 08:19 PM
18

I think you’re basically asking if a man is ever justified in cheating. In most cases, there’s no real justification, people cheat because they choose to, and it’s a shitty thing to do.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 08:01 PM
16

You deserve the chance to pursue a relationship, and that’s it, you don’t “deserve” a partner. As for your edited question, people usually choose partners who make their lives better in some way. “Average” is hard to define, but the women I know bring a lot to the table. Most contribute financially, take on a large share of chores and parenting, go through pregnancy and childbirth, offer emotional support…you know, all the usual benefits of having a partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 07:52 PM
1

What “no”? Most marriages have two working partners. Can you prove that me pay more for luxury items?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 07:43 PM
6

My main question is why you can’t seem to get past it. To continue your analogy, most of us deal with financial struggles, but we don’t spend our days ruminating on it, even though, in this context, that might make more sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 06:32 PM
3

It’s often said that women have more purchasing power, but honestly, I think a lot of that comes down to men outsourcing most of the shopping to their partners. My husband basically just follows the lists I make and the choices I’ve already decided on for groceries and household stuff. We both shop for clothes about the same (not that often), but aside from things like electronics and cars, pretty much all the shopping falls on me.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 06:14 PM
0

How can you estimate it objectively?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 06:08 PM
0

You’re still a hypocrite for engaging in behavior you think is detrimental to marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 06:06 PM
2

Men keep parroting this, but there are plenty of women who just don’t do casual hookups and stay single instead. Having a lower sex drive definitely makes that easier.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 04:48 PM
0

I doubt you know a lot of single women then.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 04:47 PM
0

I think people have to chill a bit. Not everything has to be announced publicly, and not everything needs a strong reaction.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 04:39 PM
1

It’s fine, but you shouldn’t be surprised that you’ll get rejected because you aren’t a virgin yourself. Most women who wait till marriage are religious.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 04:28 PM
2

Depends on your justification. If you think it’s immoral to sleep around, it should be immoral for everyone
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 04:03 PM
2

Most men aren’t sole providers for their families.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 04:03 PM
–

Do I deny their feelings?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 02:21 AM
–

No, your whole post is trying to redefine empathy as validation.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 02:21 AM
1

That’s statistics from dating apps.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/03/26 02:21 AM
–

I’ve dated only one woman, but she was more romantic than all men I’ve ever dated.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 09:48 PM
–

Empathy isn’t the same thing as validating someone’s beliefs. If a guy thinks women can’t have orgasms, he’s just flat-out wrong, we’ve got plenty of research proving otherwise. A better example would be a guy who’s empathetic and believes women are responsible for not having orgasms. He’s empathetic, and he thinks he has reasons for that belief, but a lot of people would disagree with him and probably find it offensive too. You can feel like people don’t understand you, while others genuinely t…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 09:46 PM
–

Hope you’ll feel better soon.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 09:17 PM
1

I don’t think prostitution really helps here. Most women want to date men with a similar level of experience, and paying for sex isn’t the same as having actual relationship experience. Maybe paying for sugar dates to imitate real dates could be more helpful.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 07:45 PM
3

How are you feeling?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 07:44 PM
–

A lot of women point this out. What you’re really looking for isn’t empathy, you want us to agree with your reasoning and confirm that your dating struggles (or other issues) are happening for exactly the reasons you’ve listed. That’s not empathy, it’s validation of your views. Empathy is the ability to understand how someone else feels and why. Most people can do that. But understanding you doesn’t mean they have to agree with you. I can understand how being single when you want to date sucks. …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 07:43 PM
2

For me, a hookup material is a guy I wouldn’t touch with a ten-foot pole. If all he’s looking for is to get his dick wet, he can fuck off.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 05:58 PM
1

I'm not saying these points are very common, I'm just giving examples of what I’m arguing against. I think looks matter, and it’s often the first filter, yes, but you and I probably disagree how high or low that filter is.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 05:54 PM
2

If that’s what you believe and you wouldn’t date someone who lives in a house, I respect that. I don’t take it that far, but I do try to cut back on buying things I don’t really need.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 05:49 PM
1

Relationships are transactional, but it doesn’t mean they’re commodities.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 05:48 PM
1

1 in 3 women are victims of abuse by their romantic partner?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 05:48 PM
10

I’m not sure how either of those buttons would make dating any fairer, but dialing down men’s libido doesn’t sound like a bad idea.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 02:52 PM
3

They need to share uplifting stories to keep people’s faith strong. It’s not very inspiring to hear about a child dying while their parents pray desperately and no miracle comes.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 02:50 PM
–

That’s a way to get more overweight women trying to eat their stress away.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 04:48 AM
16

How am I supposed to solve men’s dating problems as a married woman? Force my girlfriends to date guys they don’t want to?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 04:35 AM
9

A person who says things they might not believe just to provoke others.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 04:25 AM
4

“Vulnerable” doesn’t always mean “the highest death rate.” Sex work involves trafficking, abuse of minors, and people struggling with addictions. Saying sex work is unethical doesn’t automatically make every other job ethical. You need a place to live, but you don’t need sex. A smartphone is often necessary for work, but buying one secondhand or refurbished can help reduce the impact.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 04:21 AM
22

I don’t think that appearance is the only thing that matters. What you said isn’t misogyny, but things like “women’s rights have to be restricted because of their hypergamy” or “women are unable to love” are misogynistic.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 04:16 AM
–

I think men tend to have more visceral fat, so they should pay attention to their diet.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 03:08 AM
37

I think being single and sexless when you want to date and build relationships really sucks, and I do feel for people who are struggling with that. At the same time, I don’t agree with the black pill, TRP, or misogyny in general. When I push back on those ideas, some guys take it as a lack of empathy. Also, some men make it really hard to feel empathetic because they come across as deeply bitter and hostile. If you lean into being an unpleasant edgelord, a lot of people are going to feel like yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 03:07 AM
11

Trading sex for sex isn’t the same as buying sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 03:03 AM
–

Restaurants here have really gone downhill since COVID, prices went up, but the service got worse.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 03:03 AM
3

I don’t think sex should be something you can buy or sell. I do not support the idea that “sex work is work”. No other job puts someone in such a vulnerable position or exposes them to such a high risk of sexual assault or contracting an STD. If that’s a boundary someone has, I respect it. I do try to cut back on what I consume, but there are certain things I still need unless I’m going to go live off the grid. Buying secondhand helps a lot, and I think it’s more ethical.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 03:01 AM
–

I mean, is it cheaper for the average Thai person to eat out than it is for the average American?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 12:28 AM
9

If both parties want to have “no strings attached sex”, it’s different from buying it.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/03/26 12:27 AM
–

Is it still cheap if you compare salaries?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 11:46 PM
6

I’ve never had it, but I’m fine with other people having casual sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 11:44 PM
12

It comes down to personal preferences and boundaries. I wouldn’t date someone who’s done sex work or paid for sex, not because I think they’re “too ugly”, but because I don’t believe sex should be commodified and I wouldn’t date someone who’s okay with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 11:38 PM
11

Talking about arranged marriages as if they’ve always been the same, or always voluntary, in every culture and time period, doesn’t make sense. There are arranged marriages, there are forced marriages, and there have been, and still are, cultures where a minor girl can be “bought” for just a few cows.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 11:07 PM
3

Among all the random people you meet, some are fucked up. I’d still rather meet a male hiker than a bear.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 11:01 PM
-4

The key word is random, but I don’t really agree with a bear.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 10:36 PM
3

I think they’re just miserable. Whether it’s something about them personally or their relationship is another question. Some of them also never learned that respect has to go both ways.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 10:26 PM
14

You should ask women who actually do it. My husband and I try to keep our private stuff private. We can joke around with each other, but that’s it. My guess is that couples who do it in public don’t really respect each other. They probably nag and put each other down even more when no one’s around. They’re so bitter they just can’t hold back.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 09:06 PM
–

Why?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 09:01 PM
–

I just don’t get it, no matter the gender. I’ve seen women regretting having kids early, but it’s usually about more than hooking up.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 08:57 PM
–

Spending your last months hooking up is different from spending your life obsessed with hooking up.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 08:52 PM
–

I don’t think it’s gross for guys to want sex, but defining “living your life” by hooking up just seems pathetic.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 08:42 PM
–

A random Reddit post from askmenadvice Does it bother you that you didn't live more before having kids? Maybe this comes off as a shitpost, but are there any dads here who regret not doing more before having kids? Not just for their kids' sake, but just for your own? I personally don't want children, but one reason is bringing kids into the world while having lived a genuinely unimpressive life. Not enough hookups, experiences, and the kind of living that actually fills a person out. Like your l…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 08:17 PM
1

Good job! See how 12.5% of a group isn’t the majority?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 08:12 PM
–

I hope you’ll feel satisfied when you get a few casual encounters, but I have very high doubts that you will ever be satisfied. Mental health issues usually do not resolve on their own or by fulfilling your obsession.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 07:27 PM
1

It depends on how you define “better”. The issue is usually not morals, but social skills, exposure, mental health problems, and so on.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 07:19 PM
–

Do you realize that men can’t really compete with women for attention or a number of people interested in having sex with them? Are you sure you’ll ever feel enough?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 07:18 PM
2

Just one google away.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 07:13 PM
–

I really hope you’ll get help one day.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 05:31 PM
3

It’s a very prolific minority of men. Also, domestic abuse is different from sexual harassment or assault.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 05:29 PM
2

It is way too high, but it is still far away from “all women”.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 05:28 PM
3

Abusers? Of course, and there are male and female abusers.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 04:52 PM
8

You hear more about negative experiences, but most women have never been abused. Look up the stats if you want. I’ve never dated an asshole, but I also don’t go around proclaiming it.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 04:47 PM
3

Abuse victims stay with their abusers for a variety of reasons, but it’s rarely their appearance.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 04:45 PM
–

You should elaborate what makes a man red-pilled if you want to argue about it. Common sense advice doesn’t belong to TRP just because you keep parroting it with a bunch of misogynistic takes you add to it.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 03:02 PM
–

I used to know a girl who was into sugar dating. The guy who paid her the most was a married man with a daughter around her age who even looked a lot like her, she figured that out from his Instagram. When she decided to quit and move to another state, she ended up exposing him to his wife. Sometimes I still wonder how that woman and her daughter are doing.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 02:59 PM
–

Is it a rage bait written by a guy to trigger other men or a rage bait by a woman to trigger men? I don’t know anymore.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 04:47 AM
–

Yes, and no it didn’t have to cost that much.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 03:32 AM
–

Women have more clothing options, but men’s clothes are generally better quality. I usually have to go out of my way to find items made from 100% cotton or wool.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 03:13 AM
3

Yes, but I’d doubt it’s the same. I’ve never looked at a stranger and thought that, yeah, I wanna fuck them.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 03:09 AM
5

Yes, and if they get zero matches, they think they’re doomed to die single.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 10:24 PM
–

Depends on their age group.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 10:23 PM
–

Being bitter about your lack of experience counts as a baggage. Inexperience itself becomes a baggage at some point too. Yes, it works this way for women too, but the rate is different.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 09:09 PM
–

As I’ve said, most people care about past to a degree. The older you get, the heavier your baggage becomes.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 07:21 PM
–

Probably not. It’s a mix of whatever kept him a virgin in the first place and the mismatch that comes with having totally different levels of experience. At a certain point, inexperience becomes its own baggage.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 07:20 PM
–

I think most people care about their partner’s past to some extent, but probably not in the way some men here think. Most people, including women, just want to avoid dating serial cheaters, abusers, or people who’ve done really extreme things, like casually sleeping with hundreds of partners or being involved in sex work. And a lot of women would also prefer not to date a man who regularly uses sex workers.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 07:14 PM
–

We’d talk about sex work and his attitude toward it long before we got married.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 05:11 PM
2

Good one.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 05:09 PM
4

If I could figure him for hiding it, maybe. It would be a big issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 05:07 PM
1

As I’ve said, it really comes down to personal choice. Child custody is an issue even if you’re not married. If you aren’t married, you still have to figure out custody.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 05:06 PM
2

You could probably replace some of the benefits of marriage with a bunch of separate contracts, but why bother reinventing the wheel? We live together, build a life together, share a budget, so why wouldn’t we share the assets we earn along the way? Also, some things just aren’t possible without being married. My company won’t give my husband health insurance if he’s just my boyfriend.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 03:42 PM
3

It’s about the attitude. I don’t expect a man to bear this responsibility on his own, but I expect both partners to help and protect each other. Would you be okay with a woman stating that she does all the cooking, so she won’t life a finger to protect her husband?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 02:47 PM
–

In this case the issue is that he’s not satisfied, not that she was more adventurous in the past. Don’t stay in a relationship that doesn’t work for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 02:46 PM
–

If you tried something with your ex and don’t want to do it again, it doesn’t mean you’re treating your partner worse.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 02:16 PM
2

Great, but to me it seems that he’d protect her only if she did all the cooking for him.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 01:59 PM
2

It’s a personal choice, and people who get married usually see some meaning in it. My husband and I went into it knowing the risks. We’d already decided to spend our lives together long before we made it official, so marriage just adds a legal safety net. If something happened to me, I’d want him to keep everything we’ve built. And if one of us ended up in a serious medical situation and couldn’t make decisions, we trust each other to do what’s right. There are practical upsides too: tax benefit…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 01:57 PM
0

I don’t think it’s unfair, I’m pointing out that his comparison and the conclusions you can make from it are ridiculous.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 01:47 PM
–

Nah, it’s a mix of everything. There are guys who aren’t that good-looking who still date. He does get first dates, but no woman wants to keep seeing him.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 02:02 AM
–

All kinds of people date, but you’ve got to bring something to the table. His problem isn’t just that he’s not good-looking or that he’s broke, it’s the whole combination.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 01:26 AM
–

The more he tries, the more it creeps me out.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 11:53 PM
4

Just look up the stats.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 11:25 PM
8

I’m pretty sure women cook more than men do.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 11:23 PM
–

The guy’s really depressed and bitter. It’s not that he can’t switch, his struggles are more about his mental health, his character, and a whole lot of other stuff.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 11:19 PM
–

I don’t think he can fake being likable if he doesn’t know how to do it. Also, it’s hard to fake personality long-term.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 11:05 PM
6

So how does it work with the idea that men shouldn’t cook because they’re “protectors”?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 09:56 PM
–

The issue isn’t just a lack of confidence. He’s just not a nice company to be around.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 09:18 PM
–

No clue what he was like in college, but somehow he still manages to get first dates every now and then. It never leads to anything.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 09:18 PM
–

We used to work together. I feel sorry for him, but he didn’t exactly make it easy to like him.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 09:17 PM
12

Don’t date women seeking conflict! It’s never happened to us and we’ve been together for 10 years now.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 09:16 PM
12

If someone attacks him, I’d be willing to risk my life for him too, but we’ll most likely never even face that kind of situation. If you have biological kids, well, a woman has to go through childbirth.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 09:09 PM
–

Badger, I’d like to get advice from you myself because you sound very reasonable and kind. This guy has asked for advice multiple times, but I have no idea what to tell him.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 08:57 PM
–

He’s not pleasant to be around, and that’s pretty important for your dating life.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 08:53 PM
–

I want to say that some people are hooked on their own misery, but I wonder if it’s really a choice or if their brains are just messed up.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 08:30 PM
–

This is all pretty depressing, and it seems like people who get caught in this cycle don’t really have a realistic way out.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 08:25 PM
–

He thinks getting a girlfriend will solve all his problems, that he’ll escape his terrible living situation by moving in with a woman. But…what woman would actually want to live with him, and why?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 08:20 PM
–

If a woman doesn’t want to support him, it doesn’t mean she’s a gold digger.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 08:17 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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