TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

TheFinalGirl_21 Archive

View 2 posts and 491 comments by TheFinalGirl_21 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

Son of Patricia.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 03:05 AM
14

Some guy did this to me and a gaggle of ladies with a song he “wrote”.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 02:53 AM
10

None of these men so much as touch women. It’s as if they can’t hear themselves. Everyone knows the more a man talks about sex, the less he’s actually having.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 02:49 AM
43

WTF, Kenya?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 02:46 AM
12

It could’ve all been so simple. How useless do you have to be to fumble the dating game that works in your favor? Women with low standards literally outnumber them, and they still manage to repel those women. They deserve every bit of what’s coming.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/03/21 12:52 AM
11

And to think, judges can’t even pick up on the abuser/intimidated victim dynamic in courtroom.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/21 04:25 AM
5

“We can always be friends.” That’s their response.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/21 04:14 AM
9

His married ass needs to be having this discussion with his wife and stay out of DMs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/21 04:12 AM
17

Men don’t do time over lies. Men don’t even do time over actual rape or DV. Law enforcement and judges do not care about the safety or women (or children). I’m tired of this urban legend.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/21 04:07 AM
28

The violence is more pronounced now, because more of us are single. It used to be only our husbands beat us. Now we’re all “fair game” if we aren’t being claimed by a man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/21 04:04 AM
20

“Do they believe they’re going to annoy you into dating them?” Yes. This is what experience (and Hollywood) has taught them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/21 03:59 AM
44

Quality men are not on the Internet complaining about dating. I’m sorry, but they’re not. If these men were great catches, they would have girlfriends and wives. Women outnumber men. Women are conditioned to have low self esteem and even lower standards. And men control whether or not a commitment is going to happen. Period. No matter how badly we want to be in a relationship or married, if the man we want doesn’t want it, we don’t get to have it, and they use this power against us 99% of the ti…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/03/21 03:55 AM
12

This should be a Lifetime movie.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 06:00 PM
13

Because it’s all trash on there. Even the women who brag about the men they met on apps are dealing with stealth trash. Walk dates, coffee dates, sex talk within two replies, average looking guys who think negging is how to get women, weekend dads who still can’t manage to make time for you during the week. All trash.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 05:59 PM
13

I once saw a chubby weekend dad who had to have been pushing 48 pop up on my Bumble feed trying to pass himself off as 37. Clowndacity is correct. Lol! They think not being obese or wearing tight Affliction shirts and ripped jeans will throw the scent off the old man trail. And these baseball caps do them zero favors.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 04:02 PM
50

What the HIPAA?! I hope she sued, also.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 12:56 PM
25

Lol! They are obsessed with this “wall”. An attractive woman is an attractive woman at any age. Period. I never hear attractive men who are confident and successful at dating obsessing about this. Any man who tries to put a shelf life on a woman’s sexual market value is pretty much communicating that he has none. “Men in their late 30s/40s prefer to date younger women. That’s just how it is.” And younger women prefer dicks that work and sperm that doesn’t have three heads. That’s just how it is.…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 12:46 PM
14

Also, “Engagement rings are a scam. Did you know diamonds have no value? Back in the 19....” I’ve had several men on OLD start up with that. They’re probably still out there trying to convince a woman they haven’t even met to lower her standards.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 12:33 PM
4

This is the long and short of it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 10:41 AM
–

Those types of friends are so very draining. I have to psych myself up to answer the phone for one of my friends like that. Since I’ve eliminated men from my life, I have very little conflict. But I have to suffer through theirs by proxy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 04:44 AM
–

I’m here now. It’s a hard spot. I saw a viral post on Facebook with two women in their 90s who had been friends since girlhood. They said it’s important to have friends who know you through all stages of life. I don’t want to abandon people who have been in my life for having different views, BUT when those views are in conflict with my emotional and physical safety, they leave me no choice.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 03:51 AM
7

I’ve been in a couple of these. They usually see themselves out when they realize I actually am mature for my age. Traveled quite a bit, sophisticated tastes, independent spirit, huge network of friends and colleagues...not their naive little eye candy. Also. Gross old man saggy balls. Don’t know what I was trying to accomplish there. Social climbing can be tricky.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 02:55 AM
14

I don’t think this is talked about enough. I don’t think boys are automatically sexual deviants. There’s a cliff. A lot of my male peers were sexually molested or even raped by older girls, women, babysitters, etc. They like to brag about how they “lost their virginity at age 7 with a 16 year old girl” and shit like that is what turns them rancid towards the girls their own age, I think.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 02:50 AM
18

We all have at least one of these, honestly. No judgment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 02:46 AM
–

Oooh...a LVW red flag post? I will search for this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 02:45 AM
20

Never cared for him. Always in the car recording videos usually means they’re hiding something. He was probably on the way to the mistress’s house in half of those videos.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 02:44 AM
8

I don’t agree with everything I see here, either, but I usually either avoid the topic or politely express a difference in opinion. I notice the courtesy is not always being returned. I’ve had to block/report several ladies on here lately for unnecessarily hostile and antagonistic replies to somewhat innocuous comments. It’s very disappointing to be addressed that way by women in what is supposed to be a safe place for us on a platform that is already pretty hostile towards its female users.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 02:42 AM
28

Scarcity mindset is such a turnoff. I like to enjoy things. Can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to sit out an event or trip that I could afford, because the man I was seeing couldn’t, and I had no desire to go half and half like they expected me to. The thing is, had I done that, they probably would’ve just spent the whole time griping out of insecurity and I wouldn’t have been able to have any fun.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 02:35 AM
11

Huh? Was he raised by an enabling mommy?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 02:33 AM
10

Yes. Important detail being overlooked here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 02:32 AM
47

Whenever a man verbalizes that something I enjoy or have experienced independent of him is “expensive”, that’s always my cue to drop him. I read somewhere that they do that to tamper down our expectations. Because our impulse is to seem as low maintenance and inexpensive to court as possible.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 02:30 AM
35

Samesies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 02:26 AM
28

Can vouch for the socioeconomic bit. I grew up regular middle class, but I’ve been able to play around in higher social strata just by being charismatic and easy on the eyes. Nothing too intense, thank goodness. None of those Eyes Wide Shut parties or anything like that. But getting an audience of certain influential people in a company or community can be really useful for someone who has the right intentions.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 02:21 AM
–

Yep. Very rarely, but often enough for me to notice, someone will be very guarded and even hostile towards me at first meeting. After they actually interact with me a bit, they relax, but I’ve heard a lot,”When I first saw you, I didn’t think I was going to like you, but you’re really cool.” And...then there’s men being horrible to me, because they feel like they have to dominate me to protect their egos. Joke’s on them. I’m one of those rare beautiful women who has healthy self-esteem, like som…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/03/21 02:18 AM
5

Not joking. Had a legit photog lined up and everything. I just wanted to experience “the life” for a summer and see if I could get some decent work. She assumed I would get hooked on drugs and quit school. I’m not built that way and she knew it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 04:03 PM
8

That’s what I needed about 5 years ago. My dad doesn’t have a violent bone in his body. He’s a tall, big guy so as it typically goes, he’s very gentle and harmless. His size wards off any trouble. So he’s never really had to fight. When an ex punched me, he didn’t even feel the need to go pummel the guy into the ground (which he could have easily done). He just told me he was glad I got out of the relationship. That made me angry at him for a long time, and it’s a big reason why I don’t feel com…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 04:04 AM
183

“Tried dating young college girls” 💀💀💀💀
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 03:58 AM
8

Ooooh I hate the repeating back to me what I said tactic. They aren’t clever. They do it to intentionally throw us off balance.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 02:14 AM
6

You nailed it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 01:58 AM
58

My heart breaks for your mom. This is infuriating. I love to hear that you seem to be on her side, though. Do you think your siblings would side with her? I remember this story on Oprah many years ago about a man who basically cut off his wealthy and powerful dad for cheating on his mom. He said,”I can’t imagine how he could do something like that to such a sweet person.” That was in the late 90s/early 00s and it stuck with me. That’s how impactful it was. I’d never seen a son show loyalty to a …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 01:57 AM
14

Right? This idea of having a father present and attentive being best for girls is kind of a wash. We usually get knocked down off our pedestal pretty quickly. When I was younger and would complain about dating to my dad, he assumed I must have been doing something wrong to repel men. That’s how men think. “Pretty? Smart? Nice? No problem getting a boyfriend. Men are simple creatures.” It’s quite the opposite, and they know it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 01:54 AM
26

The men I’m vocal with in real life usually try to gaslight me and try to make me believe it’s my fault or that something is wrong with me as a woman that I can’t find a great guy. And when I shut them down with logic and measured responses, they accuse me of having a bitter attitude “and that’s probably why”. Lol! I don’t know any HVM. Apparently.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 01:51 AM
71

Yep. Now if she were cheating on him or being verbally and emotionally abusive, he’d be worshipping the ground she walks on. There is zero reward for being a sweet and loyal woman. That said, I don’t encourage pretending to be some badass if you’re not. That game has no winners. Kindhearted women just need to avoid men altogether. They don’t appreciate it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 12:02 AM
–

What you said about covers it in addition to,”Go to NYC and try modeling. Your mom is just jealous.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 10:52 PM
31

Girl, are you me? Because wow. It blows my mind. Not so much anymore, because I get it now. Most men do tend to settle for marrying the women they feel like they could have the upper hand with to some degree. They have little desire to be with a woman who lots of other men would openly desire. They can’t handle the pressure of keeping up. Women like that are for dating and fucking only, in their small minds. Arm candy for their single man days. When they’re ready to get married, they go non-thre…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 10:37 PM
56

It’s the secret. I’ve started to pick up on a teensy bit of envy from certain people. Particularly married women with lots of young children. One mutual acquaintance in particular always seems to be trying to show off her bump in my face. Yeah, it stings that I’ll never be a wife and mom like I had always dreamed (and she’s aware of) BUT...I wouldn’t even let her husband touch me in the form of a Facebook poke. She is trapped, and I’m free. And I think she knows that deep down.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 10:26 PM
23

Right? It’s something special about it. Men don’t have standards when it comes to a woman’s true beauty and intelligence. Their compliments are self-serving and predatory.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 10:21 PM
10

💜💜💜💜
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 10:19 PM
66

Exactly! It seems like most woman I know who do the whole “I’m so sassy, fuck men” thing on social media end up being cheated on or dealing with some kind of relationship dysfunction behind the scenes. The men who are attracted to that kind of energy are being predatory for the most part. They like the ego boost of “taming” the untamable and that’s about it. I’m speaking from personal experience, though. I have girlfriends like that. Who will go on about how their men would be “in so much troubl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 09:06 PM
–

I don’t like the “look at us being bitter but taken” angle on that other tweet, but it tracks for the most part. In my experience, shit talking men on social media only attracts men who see me as a challenge and set out to knock me down a peg. If any of you ladies have different experiences, I’d love to hear them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 08:44 PM
3

Haha! Fair enough. I never want to take away from someone’s good work. Besides, anyone can change.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 08:39 PM
1

I agree with you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 08:33 PM
20

I don’t want to shit on your comment, but it always rubbed me the wrong way that he had three or four kids with his wife before bothering to marry her. Maybe she didn’t want marriage? That’s totally fine. But she was a bartender when they met, so I imagine it would’ve been economically advantageous. I don’t think most women of the working class have babies with wealthy men with the intention of being forever girlfriends.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 08:32 PM
6

Been there. I’m so sorry you experienced that, but so glad you’ve found someone who is treating you better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 08:25 PM
5

This is a really good point. Thank you for sharing your perspective.🙂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 08:17 PM
-26

Oh, so we’re attacking and insulting each other here now for simply having respectful differences of opinion? Brilliant.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 08:10 PM
-2

I don’t want to “wear the pants”, though. I just want to exist. Even the “good” ones are exhausting. Ugh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 08:09 PM
6

This is interesting perspective. How would you feel if the roles were reversed? Would you feel comfortable with your partner and in laws coming into your home having conversations in your presence, knowing you couldn’t understand a word? Not attacking you. Just curious. I remember a post was shared here awhile back that described a Latina and her white boyfriend on Zoom with her parents. And they made some criticisms about him in Spanish, under the assumption that he didn’t understand but he has…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 08:07 PM
1

Yes, seriously. That’s why I typed it out. A friend of mine’s parents have a similar dynamic. Mom is a few years older than stepdad (white American) She moved here from the Philippines in the 80s. She, my friend, and her half-siblings all speak Tagalog. When her relatives visit or she has friends over, they all speak it right in front of stepdad. Nobody ever taught him. He’s asked to learn. They simply don’t want him to know what they’re saying. Sure, he could go out and find a class or somethin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 07:45 PM
31

I had some super narc HVM on paper ONLY acquaintance offer me his sperm after my last breakup. Their egos...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 07:45 PM
240

It’s funny, because in movies and TV shows (produced by men), they make it seem like any malformed, chinless goon can drop off a deposit when he’s trying to make some gas money.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 06:50 PM
59

Keanu Reeves. His humble dedication to fans (see: ice cream cone at the movie theater viral post), also the way he respectfully takes photos with female fans.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 06:48 PM
33

The only women who don’t get this are boymoms and the brainwashed. Not a dig at them. Just an observation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 06:43 PM
9

They’ll try to ask me out last minute, and I’ll be like,”I’m available next on X date.” To which they reply,”Oooh, social butterfly.” You’re gd right, bro. I’m in demand. Step up or step off. They usually get intimidated and back off, though. Men like to pretend as if they’re all cavemen deep down and are capable of fighting for the best quality women. They aren’t hunters. But gatherers...of all the low hanging fruit, mostly that which has already fallen to the ground.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 06:41 PM
79

Yeah. I’m the only unmarried woman on my all-female sales team. And it’s amazing the things they tolerate in their marriages. The longer I’ve been single, the less patience I have for any of it. And I think men can sense it, which is why they don’t hit on me as much anymore. I’m still as friendly as I’ve always been. But I think my energy is different since FDS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 06:10 PM
5

This is what I’ve been doing for a few years now. But I suppose I’ve had a bad crop of men to choose from, because they get turned off and walk away if they find out they’re not the only man you’re talking to. Like, they think you’re cheating or something. They want loyalty from you before any offer of commitment. Also...they assume we’re having sex with all the men on the rotation. Because that’s what they would do. It’s funny. Men are willing to acknowledge that we are different only when it c…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 06:05 PM
11

Scrote Boggle!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 06:00 PM
12

Thanks. He was a “HVM” on paper. Spent lots of money courting me for weeks, taking me anywhere I wanted to go, showing me off around town and to his friends, time, gifts, effort, etc. Literally ghosted me after we had sex for the first time. (No, lurkers. The sex wasn’t bad. Quite the opposite.) We were introduced by a mutual friend who I trusted, and probably has no idea how he is with dating versus her husband’s partner at his firm. I was too embarrassed to tell her why it didn’t work out. So …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 05:45 PM
15

I came here in December after being lovebombed and discarded within a month for the last fucking time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 05:22 PM
20

Yesssss! Gene pool clearing up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 05:19 PM
59

It is an insult to be wanted by a man, honestly. They have the worst taste.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 05:17 PM
81

Being raped is like having a part of you be murdered. The fact that I’ve tried to entertain men sexually and romantically since my assault just speaks to our disparate treatment. I’ve been nothing but kind, sweet, fun, compassionate to the men that I’ve dated and they basically spit in my face out of some weird desire to feel like they’re dominating me. Meanwhile, the same men were treating me this way, picking me apart as an excuse to deny me commitment, etc all because an ex ghosted them or hu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 05:11 PM
7

💜💜💜💜
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 05:02 PM
141

The more I level up, the fewer men bother trying to pursue me. Lol! It’s funny. They tell us to raise our standards like a dare. I don’t think they ever expected us to actually do it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 04:55 PM
79

I’m not giving this guy any cred. Unless he’s actually calling these men out in real-time, he’s part of the problem. This is why I don’t believe there are any good men out there. Because they don’t speak up. My dad is one of those tunnel vision types who assumes because he is hardworking and faithful and all of that, that I should just keep my eyes open for the “multitude” of men who are like that. It doesn’t even occur to him that he’s rare. He’ll complain about the sad state of men to me, but …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 04:52 PM
8

Exactly. They really don’t realize how little effort I put in. It just looks high maintenance, because I have good taste and keep it simple. I grab a dress and go, because I personally don’t care to spend hours putting an outfit together. But again, because men are largely ignorant, the assumption is that if you look like anything more than a Plain Jane then certainly you’re vapid and dim-witted and will sleep will all of their friends behind their backs if they decide to make you their girlfrie…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 04:46 PM
5

They don’t think we are, because THEY aren’t. You can either get a hot man or a smart, kind man. You cannot have both 99.99999% of the time. Women are raised to be “package deals”.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 04:43 PM
37

Important. I’m having to remind myself of this aloud everyday.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:31 PM
9

I see the sperm bank suggestion come up a lot, and I wish I could. But I just can’t go through pregnancy, birth and raising a child to adulthood alone. It’s too much.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:26 PM
19

I didn’t take it that way either, but it reminded me of some conversations I’ve had with ladies in comments on other posts and in real life. And how exhausting dating men is, and not really worth the trouble. We can’t ever really let our guards down and be ourselves, even after commitment and marriage, and it’s not fair. We have to pretend we don’t want sex yet, even if we’re very attracted to them and have the desire from the very first date. Because they’ll disappear if we sleep with them too …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:21 PM
27

Men don’t think we can be pretty and productive at the same time. It’s infuriating. Everytime I’ve started a new job, the male superiors talk to me like I’m just starting kindergarten. As if I didn’t interview and qualify based on tangibles.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 01:41 PM
41

I’ve mentioned this before, but I’m one of those ladies. Like...I would raid Dita Von Teese’s closet and never have to shop again. For first dates, I dress like I normally do, and I know it comes off to them like I’m trying to impress. But I’m really not. I enjoy looking nice and it’s actually comfortable. Period. For me to wear jeans and a t-shirt on a date would feel like trying to walk on all fours. Dating men requires way too much tactical energy. Dressing down, pretending I don’t want a rel…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 11:48 AM
4

I’ve gotten hateful DMs from pickmes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 11:34 AM
9

This is it. A genuine guy friend of mine (asexual, but used to date women and is honest) told me they do it to “control the spread”. I thought it was so weird how guy “friends” would always try to challenge my standards. These would be men who had wives and girlfriends, or they were single and not romantically interested in me, but took every opportunity to try to convince me I should lower my standards or that I’m lacking in some regard, so I don’t deserve to want those things. I was so confuse…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 11:32 AM
60

I’m so guilty of this, and so so so regretful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 11:02 AM
10

Yep. Every man I’ve ever “given a chance” to after he said he wanted a relationship but was having a hard time finding one...I quickly found out why.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 11:00 AM
81

This is what I wanted, but I’ve learned that men don’t think it’s possible for an ambitious, intelligent woman to also be a good mother. If you’re not looking to be a stay at home mom, or at the least work full-time while also being the primary caregiver and splitting all the bills with them, they’re disinterested in having children with you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 10:43 AM
17

I’ve gotten future faked to the point of wasting the last of my fertile years over this. They will bring up wanting marriage and kids on first dates, but neglect to mention the “but not with you” part until it’s too late.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 10:37 AM
30

Thank you for mentioning this, because this is my biggest pet peeve about these “stories”. Once you’ve been abused in any way, men see you as tainted. They don’t really respect you and they don’t think you’re valuable. They see you as a kind of rescue pet that will be grateful for whatever scraps they give you. Obviously, I don’t agree with this. But this is the perception of men. I grew tired of lying and pretending like I’ve always been loved and cherished and treated like a queen, so I can’t …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 02:11 AM
38

You can’t even be nice to them. They claim to want women who are easygoing and sweet, but they can’t handle it. But then if you don’t worship at their feet, they claim they don’t feel a connection.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 12:50 AM
4

Everyone who is lucky enough to find a good partner becomes condescending. It’s a big reason why I worry what grade of smug asshole I would become if I ever had the privilege to experience a good relationship. They can’t help it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 12:47 AM
6

I’m so sorry. That is horrific!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 12:36 AM
53

He used her to escape. He wanted out, and now she’s the public scapegoat.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/21 07:31 PM
1

💓💓💓💓
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/21 06:13 PM
170

The “exotic rental car” part cut me pretty deep. Because that’s the way men treat me. Ugh...I hate them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 08:32 PM
82

Forgive yourself. You’ll still cringe a little bit when things hit you years from now, but you got away and learned for the next time. That’s what matters.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 08:29 PM
8

This is why I can’t fully align with rhetoric like this. She didn’t say anything bad or wrong. But my “choice” to be single has been motivated 100% by pain, trauma, and rejection. I know that’s not healthy, and that isn’t her problem. Nor is it the problem of any other women who genuinely feel that way. I’m still working out the kinks, so when I see some “Turn that frown upside down, girlfriend, dying childless and alone is what all the cool girls are doing! Woot!” bullshit, it triggers me a lit…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 08:06 PM
21

It’s a toss-up. When I used to tell men I was seeing someone, they would back off. Now that I’ve given up and make it clear that I am done dating and will be alone forever, they see it as an opportunity. It’s odd. A guy friend from childhood reached out to me the other day and said he expected to hear “so exciting news” as the last time we spoke I was with someone. I let out a visceral,”Ew. No!” Like, the idea of dating and being with a man kind of makes me feel nauseous at this point. But I cou…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 07:56 PM
-4

I agree with you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 07:51 PM
4

“We shouldn’t shame ourselves for wanting supportive, nurturing partners.” That is literally all I’m saying. Nor should we shame other women for wanting it. It isn’t a sign of weakness or low self-esteem or anything like that, either. If someone wants food and it’s past dinner time, we don’t call them “desperate”.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 06:54 PM
9

I’ve heard the abuse stats. But from what I’ve observed with my queer friends’ relationships, there is a much different dynamic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 06:18 PM
-2

If a woman thinks marriage is oppressive, then that woman should not participate in marriage. There are women who think penetrative sex with men is oppressive, that pregnancy and childbirth are oppressive, that beauty routines are oppressive so “marriage vs companionship vs relationship vs sex vs...” the word really doesn’t matter so much in the context of what I was saying. We’re all influenced by the patriarchy, yes. But I’m not going to condescend to another woman who is choosing a different …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 06:01 PM
10

hugs Thank you for sharing that. I don’t care for the anti-picket fence rhetoric, personally. If you don’t want that or if you had that and it didn’t work out well, you really don’t have the right to discourage someone else. I liken it to someone who drops out of their freshman year in college because they found a good paying job trying to tell someone not to pursue their doctorate, because it’s expensive and a lot of work. And so what? Just because you didn’t want to try doesn’t mean it’s bad. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 04:56 PM
1

So...you’re basically me.☺️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 04:49 PM
15

That’s her choice and she’s welcome to it. If/when she changes her mind after something traumatic, feminism will still be here to embrace her. I just don’t see the value in arguing with women like this or insulting them when it doesn’t directly affect me. In her world, this may be her way of survival. Who am I (and in a position of privilege, no less) to tell her she’s wrong?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 03:55 PM
131

Men are never satisfied. They are toddlers. The goalposts never stop moving. They fantasize about independent, smart, fun, bombshells but that’s too scary for long-term, so they choose to settle down with Pickmes who make them feel like the center of the universe. So then the FOMO hits and they start emotionally neglecting the Pickme wife for not being as interesting as Bombshell. And then they cheat or leave Pickme for Bombshell, and then proceed to cheat or emotionally neglect Bombshell for no…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 03:47 PM
9

What you said, basically.😁
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 02:53 PM
135

It triggered the hell out of me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 01:41 PM
–

Been there. Good luck!👍
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 01:35 PM
–

Desiring partnership is biological, not patriarchal. But I do agree with the video’s message overall. Also, I think it’s very easy to confidently declare lifelong singlehood when you grew up in a loving, supporting home where you were validated (I don’t know OP, but speaking generally). A lot of women who romanticize “happily ever after” come from abuse and dysfunction, and finding a partner is less about patriarchal pressure and more about,”Will somebody ever love me?” or “Can I create the fami…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 01:33 PM
62

We’re not human to them. Men are not good. A woman meets a man with basic manners who hasn’t caused her harm YET and it’s all,”My HVM does XYZ and he would never do XYZ...” Girl, just wait.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 01:01 PM
104

And this is why I don’t send nudes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 12:57 PM
134

This is how most cishet relationships work, though. It’s all a house of cards.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 06:21 AM
43

This is key. And precisely why I missed my baby window. I was only meeting LVM. Nobody worth replicating. Those are the only ones available for a halfway relationship. HVM are already married or just non-existent.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 05:48 AM
72

“Prehistoric jizz”☠️☠️☠️☠️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 02:16 AM
27

Yes. So many modded replies that I never see, DMs, care alerts, and followers. Creepstown, USA.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 01:45 AM
99

He needs a handy partner to help him steal the Declaration of Independence, and young women have tiny hands and limber wrists for easy grabbing. I understand.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 01:44 AM
26

You’re right. Because I remember Kal-El had some kind of scandal some years ago when he was 19. ETA: Nevermind. I just checked. I think I mixed him up with another celebrity kid at that time. It was a magazine. Meh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 01:42 AM
190

“Cause no one wants that...” in reference to 40 year old sperm. I. Am. Dying.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 01:41 AM
8

You’re okay!☺️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 12:19 AM
19

🙏🙏🙏🙏
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 11:59 PM
9

I don’t think that’s an American accent. And yes, trap music is distinctly American, but it’s taken off internationally at this point. Even reggaetón artists are making trap music now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 11:57 PM
14

A British woman on a YouTube video I was watching the other day made reference to those silly screennames “trap” this or “drill” that. I had never noticed before. Haha!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 11:23 PM
-10

Nothing is wrong with being average. Most people are average. I tried to make things work with average guys, but it can’t. They don’t want it. And “powerful” men prefer “average” women. Being an average woman seems to be ideal. They get whatever they want.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 11:22 PM
43

It’s the weirdest thing. They’re drawn to “put together women”, but they don’t want to put in the effort to maintain us.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 10:25 PM
47

Same. It’s been excellent for networking and professional opportunities. Men think I’m “dressing up” for them on first dates, though. And as we all know, when men think you’re doing anything for their benefit, they start acting out. Ugh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 10:18 PM
32

“MrK2Trappy”☠️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 09:49 PM
101

This is my aesthetic about 80% of the time, and I enjoy it for me. It’s actually comfortable, and I don’t feel like I’m “dressed up”. It’s too much for the average man, though, and I tried so hard for so long to find a HVM who wouldn’t be deterred by that kind of presentation, but they don’t exist, so yeah. I could easily throw on some jeans and a t-shirt and be “more approachable” to men, but that would actually be changing myself for their benefit which defeats the purpose. I’ll keep happily s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 09:43 PM
54

Yepppppp. They only want us when we’re vulnerable and easy to manipulate. ETA: I had a boyfriend who would pick fights and upset me to the point where I would be hyperventilating like having panic attacks. The gaslighting... And then immediately try to comfort me like he wasn’t the reason why I was upset in the first place. They are sick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 09:37 PM
96

The music and the über UK screenname did it for me.😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 09:36 PM
11

EVERYTHING
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 11:17 AM
67

The entire dating advice/coaching industry relies on convincing the collective of straight women that we need to eliminate our standards and make things as easy as possible for men. And if men hurt us, it’s always our fault. Dating advice is usually predatory and anti-woman. Why get a real job when you can set up a blog or webcam and solicit women who have survived sexual assault, domestic violence, and emotional abuse to pay you to shit on them for simply trying to find a man who will love them…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 11:07 AM
38

Post FDS clarity
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 09:41 AM
154

Anytime dating is described in positive terms, it means the lowest effort, weakest-willed men are benefitting. I don’t endorse anything that benefits them. Dating is exhausting, degrading, demoralizing, and dangerous for women. It is not the least bit enjoyable if you actually want marriage.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 04:36 AM
19

Oh, I’m not joking at all. I agree with you, though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 04:13 AM
13

This is truly the only way to end things with them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 02:58 AM
10

This is the way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 02:55 AM
10

💓💓💓💓
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 02:49 AM
53

Not in the least.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 02:43 AM
54

I’ve found the opposite happens. They think I’m spoiled and too high maintenance and either disappear or try to take me down a notch before they do. Basically, men just hate me. But I suppose we’re even now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 02:37 AM
34

::insert “noted” meme::
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 02:33 AM
90

I can’t understand why simply dumping these men isn’t an option. They don’t think twice about dumping us. And we’re usually way better to them and more of a loss. And they let us go over shit we don’t even do wrong. Why can’t women be equally ruthless?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 02:24 AM
14

This. People referring to “work” aren’t talking about normal relationship growing pains. It’s usually something basic that involves respecting simple boundaries and standards. Effort and consideration in a marriage? Yes. WoRk? Hard pass.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/21 02:21 AM
37

I will throw myself off a bridge before I become a government broodmare. They’re severely underestimating the modern woman’s level of IDGAF if they think banning abortion will force pregnancy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 10:05 PM
152

It’s funny you mention that, too, because this has happened to me even when I don’t sleep with them. It’s like they get antsy and disappear because I’m not giving them what they want, and then they’re married or deeply committed a few months later. Men just do not want an actual relationship with me - with or without sex. I have to laugh to keep from crying.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 08:06 PM
3

Happy Cake Day!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 08:04 PM
43

“Marriage is work.” No. Gross. It shouldn’t have to be.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 06:46 PM
40

This energy!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 06:40 PM
72

This was always me. It fucked with my self-esteem for years. But not anymore. Now I understand exactly why they chose those women for marriage and not me, and I’m grateful to have dodged those bullets Matrix-style.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 06:39 PM
64

BOOM! I’m not creating more people to be consumed by the machine. Healthcare? Unaffordable. Childcare? Unaffordable. Public education? Inadequate. Higher education? Unaffordable. Tell us again why we should make more American babies?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 05:47 PM
3

She probably feels like she “won”. That’s sick. All around sick. Pickmeism is a terminal illness.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 05:35 PM
6

They don’t understand this. Or maybe they do and just don’t care. It’s a treadmill. You complain about the quality of men who approach you, so they tell you to improve yourself so you can attract a BETTER caliber of man. So you improve, but you get even more lint-pocketed scrubs vying for your attention. What gives? Then they say,”You’re not entitled to anyone.” Waaaaaaait a minute. Harvard didn’t become Harvard by accepting incoming freshman who couldn’t read above an 8th grade level, but “want…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 05:33 PM
14

One of the ladies here suggested making up a fake story of struggle or trauma and seeing how he reacts. This way you can let him tell on himself without revealing any actual trauma. I like the idea, but I don’t. We have to engage in far too much tactical warfare just to interact with them. Doesn’t seem worth it unless they’re wealthy and well connected, so you can at least gain some social status.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 12:33 PM
8

THISSSSSS! Whenever a woman tells me she found a “good one” she’s “so lucky”, I’m thinking,”Girl, just wait.” I’ll smile and feel genuinely happy for her feeling happy. But the other shoe always drops.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 12:26 PM
14

I really think those are BJ’s kids.🤭
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/21 05:24 AM
43

You know, here I was thinking he was just a shiftless POS and you’re probably right. He divorced her quickly to wash his hands of the whole thing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 11:22 PM
16

Right under our noses. I felt uneasy with that entire story arc for that reason. The only Murder of Joe’s that I could support (aside from Forty). shrugs
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 10:27 PM
2

Facts are upsetting for a lot of people.😊
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 10:24 PM
12

💓💓💓💓
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 10:13 PM
82

That’s a common theme I’ve noticed. It’s always the sweet,”would give you the shirt off their back” women who end up getting murdered by the very people they helped. It’s heartbreaking.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 10:13 PM
105

All the more reason that it actually pisses me off to hear women trying to convince me to hold out hope that good men exist. No they don’t. They are good up to a certain point and only to certain women. They stop being “good” when it no longer serves them to be. Here we are trying to give hypothetical men the benefit of the doubt, when actual men are LEAVING their sick and vulnerable wives. We are not the same.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 10:05 PM
135

I will never forget this news story I saw where a man stoked a fire that got out of hand, while on a camping trip with his wife and she was burned over 70% of her body. She literally caught on fire. He divorced her soon after. They were newlyweds! When confronted years later about why he abandoned her at such a vulnerable time, he just shrugged. Had no answer. And he NEVER apologized any point. ETA: This is heartbreaking. Beauty is only skin deep, yeah sure. When you’re young, it’s currency. He …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 10:03 PM
4

Exactly what your caption says. Flip it on them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 09:29 PM
24

This sounds like the last couple of guys who dumped me. If she’s as amazing as he describes, she’ll be a forever single, too. Men only fantasize about women like that. They don’t actually want it. It makes me sick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 09:20 PM
4

Thank you😊
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 03:47 PM
84

The narrative surrounding dating and relationships, especially for women, is that you must be a certain type of person in order to “earn” love. You have to jump through certain hoops and follow certain steps, WoRk oN YoUrSeLf, bE hApPy SiNgLe, and only then will you be “worthy” of a relationship. And if you’re still single after all of that, then it must be your fault and you must have a personality deficit. That’s the narrative, and it’s psychologically harmful. So as a person who has done all …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 01:57 PM
16

Exactly. It hurts, but we literally only have these two options.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 12:38 PM
4

She better give him full custody and his mom can live with him. That’s the only happy ending.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 12:31 PM
4

Oh dear gods, yes. We do have that power, actually. We just don’t use it properly as a collective.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 12:30 PM
15

Maybe not, but the handbook even says that we need to accept the reality that we may not find one, because there aren’t enough to go around. So by that estimation, they may as well not even exist.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 12:26 PM
14

That’s my point. I don’t believe HVM exist.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 12:15 PM
1

They can’t achieve or maintain erections without assistance after age 31, so this is a lie.😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 03:36 AM
16

It could all be so simple. They could have all the sex they could stand if they would pick one woman and simply treat her like a human being. But they can’t. They’re incapable. Their stupidity is their downfall.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 03:27 AM
30

I think HVM are like imaginary friends. They only reveal themselves to certain women, while being terrible the rest of the time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 03:15 AM
25

This is rote. No wonder they used to make men wait until a marriage certificate was signed back in the day. They’ve always been like this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 01:00 AM
24

This is why I’m celibate. I never want to experience this again. And there are no guarantees with men. Three dates, three months. It doesn’t matter. They disappear after sex. If you want a relationship, too bad. They’re fresh out of those. If you want to just hand your body over to them and hope it turns into a relationship eventually? shrugs You might get lucky. Your risk, sis.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 12:57 AM
113

I think he was worried about losing her. 6 years of dating? Yeesh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 10:59 PM
194

I saw red. He better suck it up for 16 more years, and no other woman should even so much as flirt with him. He deserves this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 10:57 PM
5

And how!😩
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 04:07 PM
17

Haha! Fair enough. I was referring to more of the peer aspect, though. Being a grown up woman who doesn’t have a husband or a LTR/live-in boyfriend can be very socially isolating. People assume something is wrong with you. If I had a husband, I’d have had more professional credibility in the last couple of roles I’ve held. Not to mention it would’ve neutralized a lot of jealousy or competition. Being an attractive woman who is unclaimed, you might as well put a giant ‘A’ on your chest.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 02:39 PM
10

And...it’s impossible to use a man for sex. His feelings aren’t hurt. That’s Hollywood myth. Even if you don’t want a relationship with him, even if you get dressed and walk out immediately or kick him out after, by virtue of letting him have sexual access to you, you are giving in. He’s seen you naked and been inside you. That’s all he wants anyway and you’ve given it to him enthusiastically, no strings attached. You haven’t “gotten over”. That’s not how it works. The only way to harness your p…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 02:02 PM
64

I had a friend complain to me about her boyfriend sleeping around and later in the same conversation, praise him for being a good man because he has a high paying job. Those are some Mary Lou Retton caliber mental gymnastics.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 01:51 PM
29

Right? All this time to talk to me about your problems with him. I’m a single woman trying to have peace at home, and I have to emotionally support myself. So you get to have the socially inclusive benefit of a relationship where you have a built-in emotional support AND you want to siphon mine? It’s narcissistic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 01:40 PM
2

“Someone who didn’t need him, but just wanted him around.” Also very interesting. Because that’s the energy I was giving off for a long time, but it was always interpreted as lack of interest or unwillingness to commit. I actually had an ex breakdown and get upset with me during an argument that it bothered him that I didn’t need him. He is now married to a woman who quite literally needs him, they’re actually pretty co-dependent. I’m just one of those unlucky women who can’t win either way. I d…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 01:36 PM
3

Thank you for your honesty! Also...you kind of confirmed my theory that if you’re just looking for sex, men are more willing to commit. Very interesting...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 01:08 PM
15

I had a window, though. There was a time when I was open and ready to meet The Guy, get married, and pregnant. I was receptive, active, and did all the things the “experts” say you should do. I met so many men during this period, and they thought I was just wonderful, but they just didn’t want the same thing...with me. They mostly managed to get married and/or knock up the women they met after me. I had so many breakups with decent guys over the baby thing, too, and I can’t even have one now. I …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 11:18 AM
79

You can’t even reason with people like that. They are to be avoided.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 10:47 AM
9

I feel this 100%, and it hurts. But a woman who can’t be loyal to her own well-being cannot be trusted. It’s really a matter of safety.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 10:46 AM
210

I’ve cut off a lot of pickme friends. I just can’t deal with that energy anymore. Contrary to popular belief, pickmes do get picked. They’re just in terrible relationships. That they whine to their friends about, while letting the man stress them out free of charge.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 10:34 AM
4

This exactly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 10:28 AM
10

😂😂😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 10:26 AM
9

I tried BFF mode but it was mostly couples clearly looking for a third.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 10:22 AM
10

I’ve run into this a few times. And I suggest they go there. But they don’t want to. They want to drag an unsuspecting woman into it. There’s no excitement in consent.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 10:20 AM
2

This is the final boss of OLD.😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 10:18 AM
22

I am so excited to see the reckoning. These idiots cost me my fertility window with their avoidant bullshit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 10:11 AM
14

🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 10:08 AM
15

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 10:07 AM
32

I’ve absolutely noticed this. I’ve dated a couple of aesthetically challenged nerds who seemed nice enough (that was where the bar has been lowered) at first. But once they realized I was giving them an actual shot, they started doing weird PUA stuff that turned me off. It’s like they just couldn’t leave well enough alone. A hot woman is giving you a chance. Be kind. Simple. Honestly, they screw themselves out of sex 99.9% of the time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 10:06 AM
33

This sounds like way too much trouble just to be the starter girlfriend. When he graduates and gets a big boy job, this will likely end.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 09:48 AM
50

Pretty much. Keeping us separated and in competition with each other is how they maintain their power. If we’re able to actually get along and share our experiences and realize how similar they are, we just might make a collective change. Funny, that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 09:45 AM
61

Men are fickle. Whether you wait three hours or three months, they will likely disappear after sex if they know you like them, which is why I was forced into celibacy. I could tell that’s all they ever wanted, and it was mentally exhausting always having to draw out a courtship to avoid being used up and discarded. Enjoying the company of someone I was really attracted to, but having to deny myself the physical pleasure of becoming intimate with him, because I knew he would disappear as soon as …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 09:31 AM
247

They’re committed to misunderstanding. The cognitive dissonance is just too strong.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 08:45 AM
18

Arrogant rare cases are what have us all screwed up. It’s not enough for them to get lucky. They have to rub it in everyone else’s face and commit to the messaging that the way they did it is the way that works. I’m so over these Horatio Alger dating stories.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/03/21 07:58 PM
99

You would think they would adapt and make themselves useful. But instead they’re digging their heels in further and choosing to be left behind. It’s really a shame how their nature is leading them to extinction.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/03/21 12:50 PM
15

Womb envy?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/03/21 12:47 PM
95

I could’ve written this. I had always had trouble with women as bosses. They would feel threatened and pull middle school girl tactics to try to exclude me or sabotage my reputation in front of higher ups. And then I had my first male boss, who was much older and much more experienced. No room for feeling threatened by me, I thought, especially when he hired me to basically mentor me into being his successor one day. Wrong. He went from praising me everyday for my talents and being genuinely imp…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/03/21 12:45 PM
4

This would be ideal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 11:59 PM
6

This is an infuriating realization.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 10:12 PM
4

Seen, heard, and felt.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 09:35 PM
1

In my observation, FDS is like a religion that has different denominations. There are several iron-clad tenets, but the rest is up for interpretation and individual practice. Everyone gets along for the most part, even if they don’t always agree. But the zealots will claw your eyes out when you don’t agree with them 100%...all in the name of the faith, of course.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 09:05 PM
12

I started doing that and they stopped coming to me. I hate that I can’t be kind to them, but they made it this way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 08:44 PM
12

A woman attacks me for my looks. I call out the fact that she’s attacking me for my looks, due to her own insecurities. I am then attacked by women for calling out a woman who attacked me for my looks. This patriarchy is wild. The menfolk do the heavy lifting, but we ladies surely take care of the rest. Good luck to you, as well.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 08:30 PM
9

Yes. I’ve seen so many women try to play nice and be civil during divorce proceedings and get absolutely steamrolled. He stops being the “father of your children”, once he becomes violent. After that, he’s the enemy. We give men way more consideration than they do us.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 05:44 PM
16

“Some of these sociopaths have more patience than we do.” This isn’t discussed nearly enough. The goal isn’t always to have sex and move on. These timelines don’t deter actual predators. Sometimes the goal is to destroy you. These male dating coaches really try to pretend like most men are sweet and we should just give them a chance. Those are the main ones who do damage. The sweet ones. They want to make you suffer for the sins of other women. You never see it coming.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 04:27 PM
7

EXACTLY!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 02:59 PM
14

I’ve heard of male counselors and therapists doing this very thing. Ick!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 02:58 PM
10

Yep. I had one of those. Ugh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 02:32 PM
33

Thank you for sharing. I remember that case of the dental hygienist in Kansas or something who was fired by the dentist, because she was attractive and it was “distracting” to him and he didn’t want to be tempted and cheat on his wife. She sued for discrimination and lost, because attractive people aren’t considered a protected class. It’s a really controversial topic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 12:43 PM
16

“Creating wreckage out of people with potential...” Goosebumps. This sounds like my youth. Men who were clearly going nowhere in life trying to latch on to me in college. One guy even lectured me about how I should give him a chance and bring him up to my level. Back then, I avoided that because you have so many options when you’re 20, so you don’t need to settle for anything you don’t really want. I think we know this when we’re young, but as we get older and the dating pool shrinks, And we get…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 12:38 PM
21

EXACTLY! Even giving them harmless attention is dangerous. They get such a boost from it. I’ve said for years,”Why don’t they just marry the kind of woman they find sexy and interesting, so they can have it all at home?” And then life kept happening, then I came here, and it hit me that they would still cheat on her, too. They’re like children at Christmas when it comes to women. It’s all about the hot new toy. They are so broken.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 12:30 PM
18

I’d suggest you check my comment history before questioning where my solidarity lies. “Frumpy”, yes. When a woman who fits that description treats me terribly simply because she suspects her husband is attracted to me, that’s exactly how I will describe her. Ask yourself why you aren’t questioning her solidarity. Just because I have the privilege of conventional beauty doesn’t mean I deserve to silently eat shit from women who don’t. That ain’t sisterhood, either.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 12:25 PM
9

Like flag girls with the marching band.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 07:27 AM
24

You sound like me to my friends trying to date right now. If I hear,”But it’s okay. He’s really nice!” one more time... I’d honestly feel better if someone looked me in my face and said,”I’m lonely and I require male validation to survive.” I really would accept that over the excuses that I keep getting over the lowest of efforts.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 07:25 AM
13

Right? Jump, my guy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 07:21 AM
35

I definitely see that pattern. But why me? Like, nothing about me or the way I carry myself says I’d be content as a used up side piece. I don’t “look” vulnerable for precisely that reason. But it seems those types aren’t what they want anymore. They want the challenge/ego boost of taking a confident woman down.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 07:14 AM
73

That makes me so angry for you. I’m sorry.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 06:52 AM
182

I remember these days. Men love to bring up “crazy” women who key cars and throw bricks through windows, while having nothing to say for men who literally murder us for declining dates or refusing to give out our phone numbers. I’m not the type to wake up in the morning and choose violence, but I’m not mad at those women at all. I figure, they’re fighting for me. How many of us have been strung along like this and left utterly broken? Sometimes permanently broken. We have to swallow our anger an…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 06:50 AM
10

This is where I am.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 06:33 AM
53

I think that’s exactly it, and it’s such a hurtful assumption. I don’t even think married women realize how hurtful it is, and I’m not even talking about feelings. That perception can affect our career trajectory. Like, FFS, I can’t find a husband to combine incomes and grow wealth together. Let me not have to worry about losing my livelihood, because someone’s frumpy, insecure wife is resentful of my existence.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 06:30 AM
187

I LOL’d. Men will literally do the opposite of anything we want. It’s intentional. They chase you down for sex, but the moment they realize you actually enjoy sex, they deny you. They like groping you at inappropriate times, but don’t want to engage in mutually enjoyable sensual touch. They might know you want to be deeply penetrated, but they give you oral and stop there. They’re psychotic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 05:59 AM
149

One thing I hate about being single is that married men assume I’m easy pickings. It’s “harmless” for them to flirt with me, because they’ll never leave their wives, but they want to get me emotionally attached for some reason. And if I dare point out how inappropriate the DMs or comments are, they can easily use their family as a crutch in order to embarrass me into remaining quiet,”Oh, I didn’t mean anything by that. I’m happily married. Sorry you took it that way, but I just see you as a frie…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 05:24 AM
108

Oh, same. I’ve absolutely been taken advantage of by male “friends” during periods of depression. They are vultures. It makes me so angry when I look back.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 04:47 AM
6

I absolutely love how there was minimal effort to obscure his name and face. I don’t know if it was intentional or not, but I love it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 04:26 AM
–

Men don’t want our friendship. So many women delude themselves into thinking they have control over platonic friendships, because they told a man they don’t want a relationship with him. That’s even better for him, actually. He gets to soak up your time and feminine energy without having to invest emotionally in you. Male “friends” also love it when you swear off dating (or sex), because they don’t have to compete for your attention as much. And if they suggest you try dating women or volunteer …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 04:18 AM
21

It’s either sarcasm or he’s trying to draw in a fence-sitter. The males are sentient. I’ll give them that, but they are never this self-aware.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 03:57 AM
26

Right? Paying alimony to an able-bodied adult male in a patriarchy is basically child support.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 02:46 AM
25

This is great. One thing I wish women would stop doing is warning men that you might leave or that you will and giving them a date. This is a grave error that too many of us make, and I see it in true crime shows a lot. “I want the kids to have a good Christmas, so I’m staying until then and we’re moving in with my parents at the first of the year.” Cut to him setting the house on fire on NYE after shooting them all in the head while they slept. I’ve had to rush and move out while a man was at w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 01:22 AM
8

Boymoms cannot be trusted under any circumstances.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 12:55 AM
3

EXACTLY! And the music did not disappoint.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 12:44 AM
8

I’m so glad you’re here. You will be so much better prepared for life than I was.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 11:47 PM
1

I was waiting for that music! Lol!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 11:44 PM
13

Like I said a few days ago, you can only be beautiful if they think you’re dumb. Had she been able to have Mensa-caliber conversations on the first date, there would never have been a second. Let alone marriage.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 11:41 PM
23

I try to help my friends, but they always make excuses for whatever men do. It’s frustrating. I’m done. This is my secret safe place.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 11:38 PM
29

This is legit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 11:33 PM
78

You cannot entertain marriage with men who contribute nothing and earn less. You can’t. You will be stuck paying alimony in the event of divorce.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 11:31 PM
37

I’m not having a baby with a man I met two months ago. Let’s start there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 11:25 PM
57

I’ve never felt compelled to argue with a man about what his preferences are. The fact that they do this to us instinctually is proof of how dangerous they truly are.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 11:18 PM
3

It’s possible. I only use the antibacterial toy spray.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 01:59 PM
16

You sound like me. But I want to tell you that your standards aren’t too high at all. Men are so used to underperforming and being waved through the gates by Pickmes, they make us feel like we’re expecting too much.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 01:50 PM
28

This is my philosophy. It applies to marriage, as well. That dick better enhance my entire life, socially and economically. Otherwise, not even worth it. Can you imagine having to cut coupons and eat sandwiches and cutting your own hair, and still being expected to be subservient to a man who can’t afford you any luxuries? Tragic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 01:47 PM
3

Oh no! What do you use to clean your toys? Also, I got BV for the first time when I started wearing skinny jeans about a decade ago and read that could be a factor.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 01:43 PM
21

Personally I don’t want to give one of them the privilege of even touching me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 01:39 PM
17

What?! I don’t know, maybe it’s regional. The men in my area seem to stop being able to achieve erections without performance enhancers around 34-35ish, so I attributed it to that. If anyone is audacious enough to send me a pic of a floppy flesh cannon, I’ll be making it my personal mission to relieve them of their self-esteem. So men think women they don’t know want to look at their 45 year old scrotum? Well, I have to admit I am shocked, and literally nothing they do shocks me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 01:24 PM
25

I’ve been following this story for quite awhile. Two things that did it for me: Her daughter didn’t like or trust him, but she moved him in anyway. He was a “doctor” who was never at work. Doctors put in 70 hours per week at minimum, and this guy seemed to always have his feet up and chilling in her house all day. I think she was lonely and prideful and didn’t want to admit she had made a mistake.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 06:45 AM
47

Nope, nope, nope. You are not low value, and being neurodivergent should never be a factor in that. Value is related to your character and how you treat the people around you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 06:41 AM
37

This sounds like an age range thing, honestly. And I say this as someone who has heard it all on OLD. I stopped getting questions like this (and dick pics) once I hit 35. It was like magic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 06:32 AM
15

As of August 2020, he still believes he has a shot with the other woman. It’s unreal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 06:21 AM
60

This part right here. I’m an extrovert. But it can be exhausting having to force high maintenance when I don’t want to. Sometimes I really do want him to bring me food and cuddle on my couch all day, but shit. We’ve only gone on two dates. Once you start the chill at home stuff, they never want to take you anywhere ever again. And it sucks for them, because they run off thinking I want to be wined and dined 5x per week. But I guess it works out in the end, because I could only be with the kind o…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 06:14 AM
58

This is it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 05:34 AM
3

I’m relieved that made sense. I like to use older jargon unironically.😁
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 05:32 AM
82

Which says a lot about men and what women know about men, while choosing to breed with them anyway. If the expectation of divorced dads as primary parental figures became normalized, they would be less eager to divorce and far more women would be childfree or simply choose to adopt or go the sperm bank route. The overwhelming majority of men do not deserve replication. It’s about time we accepted that reality as women. And like I said, this obviously doesn’t apply in cases of abuse or neglect. B…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 04:27 AM
55

THISSSS
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 03:41 AM
10

And there it is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 02:40 AM
173

Moms encourage the kids to pump up daddy, because they know. These men are abandoning households that revolve around them and their egos. They can never be satisfied.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 02:35 AM
78

Yep. And I do understand why women don’t want to hand their babies over to abusive and neglectful exes. But this needs to be normalized. Hand him over $100 per month in child support (because of the massive income gap) and be the fun weekend mom while living your own life and building your career. That’ll fix these erectile deficient wagons. The new woman is going to be miserable. I’ve seen it many times. Can’t wait for the update.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 02:33 AM
4

These ones are not even handsome most of the time. Arrogant jerks used to at least be hot back in the day. I don’t know what’s gotten into these guys.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 02:21 AM
123

The one about the talking down to us hit me so hard. The very last guy who did that...I have his smug smirk etched into my brain. He knew exactly what he was doing. I am so glad I never have to see his dry, blemished face ever again. Nobody can ever accuse me of not giving the aesthetically-deficient nerds a chance. The funny thing is, all he had to do was be kind to me. That’s literally it. And his male nature overrode common sense and messed up his chance with the hottest woman who would ever …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 02:16 AM
20

“Everything” “Tacos” Pineapple on pizza Jim and Pam “Traveling” “...a woman who can keep up with me” OLD Bingo!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 02:11 AM
58

My advice is to give him full custody. That will solve everything.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 02:05 AM
246

Men want our standards low, so they can be applauded for doing the bare minimum. I’m very put together, but also very easy to talk to and good company. Men confuse this and say,”Wow! You’re so down to earth.” I don’t like that. I’m no snob, but I realize the second men suspect we’re remotely able to enjoy simple pleasures, they will start to lower their efforts. They can’t seem to reconcile that a woman can enjoy simple things and higher-end experiences at the same time. They’re like,”Whew! She’…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 02:01 AM
206

This is probably why the “marriage is the end of sex” narrative persists. When you’re just dating and living apart, he’s taking care of himself. But once you’re married, suddenly he can’t cook, clean, launder, wipe, or function. It’s funny how that works.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 12:37 AM
418

It’s impossible to feel raw sexual desire for a man you have to clean up after and remind to go to the doctor and put his clothes away. I don’t see how these JakeysWifey08 types brag about these dudes on IG.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 11:19 PM
3

Is it okay if I message you privately?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 10:16 PM
4

They truly are. Matchmaking services are legit. Class divide abounds, but it’s almost necessary. I don’t want certain men having access to me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 10:13 PM
9

I still debate about this theory, but you’re probably right.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 10:05 PM
10

He wants to put a baby in her to lock her down as a permanent source of housekeeping and care. As long as they have a child together. She’ll always feel obligated to him. Men know this. It’s why they recoil at any mention of marriage, but request barrier-free sex. He won’t change.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 09:58 PM
7

The music!😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 09:44 PM
33

Absolutely. Their parents’ coddling has them expecting women to do the same. And when we don’t roll out the red carpet for them simply existing in our lives, they are confusion. Dave and Sheila still cut the crusts off their bread FFS. Surely, you can be a silent bangmaid and be grateful for the privilege.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 09:17 PM
30

Exactly. You almost have to program them with dogma and peer pressure them into being decent.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 09:14 PM
90

They’re just like this. I bet he has sisters who are lovely people. Parents of boys have been f-ing up big time for quite awhile. It’s like girls are raised to be decent human beings who enhance their communities, but boys are given a stick and allowed to run in an open field all day from birth to 18. No rules, no boundaries, no behavioral expectations. Then the parents love to play dumb,”Our Ashley is headed to Harvard med after Peace Corps and we’re just so proud of her. We need to have a talk…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 09:06 PM
7

Yes. I think it is, actually. I actually gave up on my dreams of having a family initially because of harassment on OLD. I cannot tell you how many men would match with me, then try to convince me I was too old to want marriage and kids (starting around 35). Nevermarrieds/No kids 36-39, telling me I should just focus on myself because I’ll be happier or try to date younger men. But they still wanted families, but with a woman with younger ovaries. And until they met her, they were content wastin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 08:50 PM
12

This is my life, too. I’m so sorry. They date us to hate us.🙁
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 06:50 PM
9

OOOOOH! Hot take, I love.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 06:10 PM
24

Right? The socially misfit teen boys were promised that when they reached college (or their 20s), there would be lots of women waiting for them. But that didn’t happen. So, then as 20something late bloomers, they were promised that when they reached their 30s, all the women who rejected them in their teens and 20s would be eating their fat, unmarried, cat hair-laden hearts out, and they could have their pick of 20 year olds, bEcAuSe WoMeN LiKe oLdEr MeN. By then, they’ll have progressed in their…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 05:09 PM
32

I remember seeing a zoological exhibit as a kid that talked about explorers back in the day how they would just go around the world looking for rare and exotic looking species of animals in order to study. I will never forget one picture of a rare bird that was found in China. It was a black-and-white photo because I believe this was in the 1920s. This beautiful creature was trapped and killed for the express purpose of curious scientists to cut open. But before that, they strung it up by the fe…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 03:51 PM
26

I’m honestly going to cry. It’s been amazing finding so many women here who can relate. You can’t really discuss this topic casually without coupled women feeling slightly insulted or men who are triggered by your unlocking the code trying to deflect and shame you back into silence.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 02:51 PM
49

Oh, they all love it at first. Because it’s exciting to them to have “caught” a truly special woman. Because we are. But men don’t want special women. It always eventually becomes “too much”, so they release us thinking they’re allowing us to be free to find a man who is “good enough”. But they know that won’t happen. It’s a a way for them to absolve themselves of guilt for promising us the world, then letting us down. “She’ll be okay. She’s amazing. This is fine. She won’t even be hurt.” It’s l…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 02:37 PM
2

I really hope this isn’t what I sound like when I say the same about them. Because what I say about them is actually true, and not sour grapes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 02:27 PM
58

Has he been publicly defending her in a chivalrous display yet? If he is, I can’t hear it over the “not all men” chanting...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 02:25 PM
251

I will never understand people who are lucky enough to have a “boring family life” but feel the need to insert chaos. How sheltered and privileged are these people? There was a time when I would have done anything to find a man I was attracted to and was kind to me and marry him and have a baby with him and get a modest house in a quiet neighborhood and a dog and weekends with the grandparents and annual Disney trips and waking up on Sundays together to make pancakes and just doing mundane middl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 02:13 PM
43

They’re preemptively refusing to meet the standards of a child who isn’t even dating yet. This just goes to show that they know exactly what is expected of them, and they intentionally deny us dignified courtships. I was lurking on the Dating Over 40 sub and a woman posted about how the men on OLD are so presumptuous and vulgar within a few messages. Some guy replied (and is rightfully downvoted into oblivion) and I’m paraphrasing: “What do you expect at age 40? That were supposed to wine and di…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 02:01 PM
115

Fully secure women have to be single. There’s really no other option. Men don’t want women who they don’t have some kind of upper hand over. They need to feel better than us at something or if they know they aren’t, they need to feel like they’re conquering a Top Shelf Woman and bringing her down a peg (or several). I will never forget meeting an attractive medical professional who had licensure and research done in her name, but legally changed her name at age 50 for a first time marriage to so…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 01:15 PM
15

hugs
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 11:56 AM
3

This also reminds me a bit of that episode of 30 Rock when Liz was at odds with the guest writer/comedian who had the baby-voiced bimbo persona. It is really interesting the way self-proclaimed feminists gatekeep women who don’t fit their approved aesthetic. Unless we all buzz our hair down, eschew basic hygiene, and wear burlap sacks, we’re performing a little bit for the patriarchy. Besides, there is no escaping the male gaze. They are obsessed with us, even (especially) when we aren’t interes…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 10:16 AM
2

EXXXXXACTLY!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 09:56 AM
5

I wasn’t implying that we should attempt to force anal. I was referring to their dumb jokes. Like, if a man makes a sexual innuendo or joke that implies you would like to be penetrated by some phallus, flip it on them,”Why would I want that? Oh...is that something you’d want done to you?” Then he’ll either recoil in horror or assume you’re just too stupid to “get” it. Because men know damn well how degrading it is to be penetrated by them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 11:26 PM
10

The dog. Lol!💓
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 11:03 PM
12

Being an excellent human being. I am so proud to have witnessed the transformation, both internally and externally.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 05:00 PM
34

This is pretty consistent with what I’ve been hearing. I have a friend who transitioned from a butch lesbian to a man and says, they had to unlearn a LOT of internalized misogyny.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 04:58 PM
64

My lesbian friends tell me women can be just as treacherous, but they all do seem so much more stable long-term. And minimal testosterone in the household is always good.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 04:43 PM
209

This is really what it comes down to. Props to the ladies who keep trying the beat the dead horse, but it’s done. High value men are like billionaires, as in they are equally rare. Most women who desire romantic partnership with men will have to settle.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 01:51 PM
63

We need to normalize this kind of reaction. Flip it on them everytime. Watch them realize how unfunny they are.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 01:47 PM
3

This makes me so angry. Women who chase men cannot be trusted.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 12:17 PM
2

A 1 percenter.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 10:08 AM
8

I actually loved that she looks like this while saying this, because the reactions to her message exposes people’s inner monologue. She may be putting on a persona, but she’s 100% correct. Separate the wheat from the chaff. Also...some women do vocal fry and some women do naturally sound like this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 03:10 AM
7

I used to watch that stuff as a teen, but I learned from it. There was Temptation Island on FOX. Watching Ytossie taught me what I would and would not accept from a man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 03:04 AM
7

HVM don’t do apps. If you do find one, he’s a 1-percenter who has ignorantly wandered in there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 03:01 AM
65

This is precisely why I surrendered to a life of being alone. Men say they want women like me, but they buckle under the pressure of keeping up every time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 02:57 AM
15

They project a lot onto us. They can’t fathom women being more than one thing at the same time, because they’re incapable of it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 02:56 AM
131

For them to think we’re all fat and ugly and worthless, they sure spend a lot of time and energy monitoring what we say and trying to contact us. I had to put in my bio on here that I don’t even read chat requests. I just reject and block. This is the one place I have to be safe from men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 02:44 AM
9

Back when I was dating and optimistic about the state of men, this is what was always in the back of my mind when someone would accuse me of being desperate or tell me I should just forget about men. The presence of a man made me feel safer. Creeper neighbor would back off when he saw a new guy’s car parked in my driveway overnight consistently. Inappropriate coworker would back off if word got out that I was seeing someone. Men only respect the presence of other men, if that. Living as a single…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 02:35 AM
8

Oh, I wasn’t disagreeing with you at all. I do resent the fact that our beauty and value is only validated if a man says so, though. General consensus says I’m in the 8-10 range, but I still have people giving me,”Well you don’t have a man, though...so you must not be as high value as you think...” it’s sickening. If I weren’t solidly confident and surrounded by supportive friends. I would probably be settled into a LVM relationship right now. On Bridgerton when Daphne goes,”If I don’t get marri…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 10:07 PM
59

Ugly men are truly the worst. And their poor attitudes driving women away causes them to be even more bitter and keeps the cycle going.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 09:15 PM
60

Dad bods with no kids is unacceptable to me. Straight to jail.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 09:14 PM
19

The sad thing is, having a boyfriend/husband does validate your desirability per social norms. No matter how hard we fight it, that is the standard, as long as we exist under patriarchy. Yes, logically, it doesn’t. But logic doesn’t apply to social norms. Humans are communal creatures, and will continue to adhere to those social norms en masse. It will take several more more generations for common sense to catch on. In the meantime, all of us here look like doomsday preppers. Which I’m okay with…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 09:12 PM
6

Women with beauty, brains, and talents are better off single. Men despise that combo. They will destroy you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 01:55 PM
2

Perfect explanation, and your background resonates with me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 01:02 PM
3

Re: Kid Leashes This has always been such a touchy subject, but it’s hardly that cut and dry. When I used to nanny (a millennia ago), they were a useful way for the kid to think they were independent. Toddlers are establishing their freedoms, totally normal stage in child dev. They don’t want strollers as much anymore, and you don’t always want to carry them (especially when they’re having a tantrum and go “noodle”)? Enter the kid leash. They get to walk “freely” within a safe radius, but always…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 04:37 AM
3

Precisely. You’ll never be Queen with a displaced jester.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 04:29 AM
5

I love this perspective. And I mean no offense to women as a collective, but I think men’s poor mate selection is also a factor. They choose women based on odd power dynamics and manipulation. It’s no surprise when things don’t work out. If they actually pursued women based on long-term compatibility, the prospect of building a life partnership or a family, and not if they felt like they had the upper-hand, these relationships wouldn’t be falling apart before the kid is potty trained.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 04:26 AM
28

Beyoncé. A mortal male cheated on Beyoncé. That’s when I knew they were irredeemable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 04:19 AM
4

I enjoy this. Because the kind of women who would use it deserve to be using it. They tend to be the judgy ones who smug all over me for being single.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 04:18 AM
3

This is what relationships look like now. Pretty pickmes and duds (not a typo) who grow beards to hide their fug. I’m grateful to be off the hamster wheel.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 04:15 AM
3

This is wonderful! You’re so inspirational. This should be Queen Shit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 04:07 AM
18

Slow fade, honestly. They get the hint. I have girlfriends who have boyfriends of several years who I’ve never met. They know better than to introduce me, because I’ll run them off, because they are underqualified. Pickmes know better than to bring ridiculousness at your feet when you set the tone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 04:05 AM
24

NEVER AGAIN!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 04:01 AM
21

This music! Lol!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 03:51 AM
7

Single moms are treated like garbage. The way men talk about them on dating apps. Ick. Again, projecting. Single dads feel entitled to childfree women, because they don’t want to have to deal with other people’s kids.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/21 12:00 AM
4

Yes, I am describing my own lived experience, which others on this thread have co-signed. That isn’t projecting. Have a nice evening, though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 11:32 PM
4

You’re projecting a lot. Nowhere did I bash single mothers. I gave them props in the first paragraph. My comment stands, though. Single dads need to put a lid on it and continue supporting their exes financially - if that is their priority - instead of trying to drag new women into their mess and expecting her to accept scraps.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 10:51 PM
11

RIGHT? Like, unless you can build me a house from scratch or something, I literally have no use for you males and your appendages after this kind of playtime.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 06:45 PM
3

But to at least tell him it wasn’t comfortable? Like, is that what marriage is? Tolerating sex that you don’t enjoy?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 05:16 PM
6

Yes! A friend highly recommends.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 03:35 PM
17

I agree. It can be gradual. I didn’t realize how damaging porn was until reading more after I stuck around. At first, I was like,”What’s your beef, ladies? Consenting adults!” Took my awhile to come around.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 12:39 PM
23

This reeks of “she got pregnant, so we tried to make it work”.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 06:01 AM
110

“I can’t afford to live by myself, and she won’t fuck me anymore, so will you?”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 05:57 AM
4

This dude sounds like he was raised by an Andrew Dice Clay stage persona. Ick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 04:42 AM
26

Right? Dude, do like single moms have done for forever. Pack it up until the youngest is a year from graduation. It would save so much drama. Maybe they would be more prudent in their sperm management if they knew they would be tied down for 18 years, like we are.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 04:38 AM
9

I’m fascinated by the UPS truck video...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 04:08 AM
10

It’s funny to me when they make the pensive face, chin on hand. He looks like one of the Wet Bandits. At least he’s not wearing a suit and staring off into the distance.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 04:07 AM
30

Baby Amy Adams/Isla Fisher has pipes.🤗
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 03:50 AM
193

And don’t even get me started on these “no women allowed” hunting, fishing, and camping trips. It’s like Ancient Greece in the woods, I bet.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 03:45 AM
90

What turned me off single dads for good was the fact that they have nothing left to give. Nothing. Single moms at AT LEAST try to be good partners, lovers, and maternal figures in most cases. Bring feminine energy. But these clowns... Single dads show up broke. The ex has their money, because they let her be a stay at home mom, or just never told her “no” and he continues to fund her whims and comforts, while expecting you to pay half of everything and be a gd workhorse. I worked two jobs with a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 03:39 AM
127

It’s such a shame she’s too far along. And I’ll just leave that there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 02:55 AM
3

I’m glad that they’re vocal, so they can’t hide anymore. I do wish there was a secret squad of folks to track them down and put them in a panel van and they just disappear. Like those “death vans” in China.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 02:48 AM
17

We really do need to stop rewarding commitmentphobes in the sunset of their lives. But I do have to express gratitude for the pickmes. If women actually practiced solidarity and didn’t give in until out demands would met, men would become (even more) violent predators.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 02:43 AM
45

This is a placeholder comment. I need to check my drawer later and Google the names for you. 😁 ETA: Mine are easy to link to me if I share the models, because I’ve done video reviews of them and I want to maintain my anonymity here. But...I found an article that conveniently shows how some of them look. Particularly the Satisyher Pro, MysteryVibe Crescendo, and Zip Vibe. Three of mine are similar designs from different makers. I like toys that look like other things. Things that are overtly phal…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 02:35 AM
32

Yep. No pity. I was lurking on a mom sub and they were griping about husbands not bathing the kids. One woman even said “when our first was a baby he said he didn’t know how...” And I was thinking,”You bred with this person twice, sis?”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 01:18 AM
138

I had a couple of boyfriends who would try to blame me for verbalizing that there may be a problem. Me asking if everything was okay with their limp dick is the reason why they couldn’t maintain an erection, of course. They will try to shove their flaccid dicks inside of us and just hope it gets hard. Like they’re crankstarting a jalopy or something. I had to tell a 32 YEAR OLD MAN who had recently divorced his high school sweetheart that putting a limp dick inside us is very painful, because bi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 01:14 AM
27

💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 01:09 AM
176

I had to cut male friends out, too. When I verbalize,”I’m done with men. I’m no longer dating” for some reason they assume that means I’m going to be a lesbian or that I’ll be sexually available to them on a casual basis. “Oh you don’t have a boyfriend and you don’t want one? Let me hover around until you’re lonely and horny!” They are depraved. And delusional. My toys are epic. European and Japanese adult toy engineering are chef’s kiss. I wouldn’t want to try to compete with that if I were a m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 01:08 AM
76

This. I understand the whole “trying to leave an abuser 7 times” thing. But once they start trying to drag other women down with them, I’m peeling their treasonous fingers off the edge of my lifeboat, if you catch my drift.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 01:02 AM
94

I feel for victims of DV who are psychologically damaged and mind their business. Any woman who is aggressively pickme, and attacks or judges me for being single and having standards can f—k right off.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 01:01 AM
18

tears of joyful commiseration
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/21 12:59 AM
3

That makes sense. I have an adult swim mentality on here, though. Like, just sit back and watch until you’re old enough to keep up. I know that’s messed up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 07:12 PM
17

Metaphors are helpful for learning. Nobody here thinks a woman is an object.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 02:46 PM
138

I cringe at graduation day proposals. A friends boyfriend proposed during the grand opening of her art gallery and I was pissed. Couldn’t even feel happy for her, because I knew she was now tied to a selfish, insecure manbaby.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 02:41 PM
12

It’s really frustrating. They want to enjoy the perks of having beautiful, fit, educated, women who earn their own money and still perform as housewives after a long workday, while they are overgrown children. They don’t even have the sense to be embarrassed. “What is your purpose in my life? Why should I give you a chance?” “I am man. You need man. pounds chest”🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 01:30 PM
4

If you have a man in your home and you’re working two jobs to survive? He needs to GTFO.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 06:56 AM
27

This is highly relatable content. It’s really something when your friends try to hook you up with any old thing off the street just to fill a good deed quota. I mean, you’re single. Why are you being so picky?! That’s what they’re thinking, probably.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 06:46 AM
54

Mostly this. Yep. Blinders on, mirrors non-existent.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 06:44 AM
89

Short answer: To destroy you. You’re doing well. Men hate that, especially when they aren’t. They seek out exceptional women in order to tear us down. That’s the only power a weak man can experience. It’s not even a matter of being insensitive or arrogant with avoiding men like that. It’s a personal safety issue. Shutting them down at the gate could even save your life someday. They claim we’re stuck in fantasyland and want fairytales, but all of their romantic attempts are inspired by tv and fi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 06:41 AM
35

I love this. Because it’s the absolute truth. I love being beautiful and unattainable. After years of “giving chances” and “lowering standards”, I realize they will never step up. They just don’t want to and there’s no need for them to try when so many woman are willing to accept the bare minimum.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 06:24 AM
6

They won’t leave you alone until they’ve drained you. And when you finally give up trying to love them through all the pain and become angry, they call you crazy. I’m so sorry about your loss.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 04:25 AM
3

Etsy! I need that on a shirt!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 04:22 AM
63

I agree. I think it’s also a little bit corralling. They know we outnumber them, that they are mostly awful, and that they still want sexual access to us. But they have no intentions of making themselves appealing in any capacity. Convincing us to lower our standards or adjust our expectations is their way of getting exactly what they want without doing anything differently, and we don’t get anything but Instagram bragging rights on #MCM. It’s a magnificent hustle that befalls far too many of us…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 04:17 AM
8

I’m sorry you had to experience that, in med school no less (way to go, by the way!). I read somewhere on a different forum that people don’t care to hear what problems beautiful women may have, because they figure you get to look like that, so you don’t have a right to complain about anything. It’s a collective sickness. We have this obsession with beauty, but a visceral hatred of people who actually possess it. I mean, even straight men HATE classically handsome men. They attack their sexual o…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 04:07 AM
128

I was permanently banned from there on my third day for calling out men in their 30s for refusing to commit, and thinking they can waste our time and land 25 year olds when they turn 40. Lol! ATTN LURKERS IN YOUR 30s: Sperm has an expiration date, as do hairlines. Unless you are handsome, fit, and/or wealthy, when you hit 40, younger women will be creeped out by you if they aren’t already. And if you are none of those things, and you do happen to land a 20something woman, she will not be the kin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 04:01 AM
27

Yeah. Only about 1-5% of men are relationship material. It’s rough as hell. And we know it, which is why we’re so competitive with each other for their attention and that’s why women who do get “good” ones like to brag about it all the time. They know they didn’t do anything special, but that they got lucky. Point blank. “I got a man!” Yeah, dating is like wedding dress shopping at Filene’s Basement.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 03:50 AM
2

Awww, thanks. Hugs to you, too. I hope you get to have your family.💜
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 12:40 AM
3

Like watching a chimp try to use a banana like a telephone. Ha!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 09:41 PM
36

Right? It’s something I connected the dots about within the past couple of years. Old habits die hard. Most families are either poor or just comfortably making ends meet. Back in the day, sons could always “earn their keep” by working and bringing money into the home starting at a young age. Girls were a “burden”, because you had to get them married off. And that was her only shot at economic security and insurance that she would be taken care of when they were no longer around. The “best” husba…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 08:44 PM
35

What? It’s been “apes strong” all over Reddit for weeks. Someone’s feels were definitely hurt.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 08:21 PM
54

And a dab of hyaluronic acid across these t-zones every now and again won’t hurt either, guys.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 08:19 PM
29

What a complete spleen of a human being! And that has to be my biggest pet peeve, when someone misunderstands you, but insists it is you who is confused. I try to avoid conflict in communication, but that’s one that I always nip in the bud ASAP.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 08:13 PM
67

Oh and Megan Fox is definitely a feminist from what I’ve seen in her interviews. Even had a SAHD for a husband for several years. They just hated her because she’s gorgeous and her body is absolutely sick. It wasn’t until recent years that I realized men resent beautiful women. I knew why other women would, because it made sense from an evolutionary perspective. The the way men like to toss out “I bet she’s stuck up” “I bet she only dates rich guys” “she’s probably an airhead” comments at the me…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 08:10 PM
4

Right? Every single man who approaches me is like this. Every one. I don’t seek them out. I don’t pursue. I keep a safe distance and boundaries. I vet. I’ve even tried the thing where I break the ice with casual conversation with a man I’m attracted to. Hoping, maybe he’ll realize I’m a human and not and object, and relax enough to ask me out. Because letting them just come to me gives away to all manners of ridiculousness. I hate rejection - giving and receiving. The only men who approach me ar…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 08:05 PM
74

I noticed that, too. I never had any beef with Olivia Munn, and I was a dedicated Jezzie. It was so awkward the way it always felt like they were trying to make me dislike her, but glorifying Beth Ditto or another woman who didn’t “fit” the ideal. I’m sorry, but fetch won’t be happening anytime soon in that regard. I’ve seen this discussed here, where women try to shift objectification to other body types. I mean, good luck. But that’s no good for any of us. Jealous “feminists” gave Pamela Ander…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 07:48 PM
125

That’s pretty much the only option when it comes to being in a romantic relationship with a man. Compromise everything or lower your standards by at least half. The women who talk about how happy they are have trained themselves to be okay with what they’re getting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 06:46 PM
12

Oh yeah. My DMs are gaining traction here. I just block immediately.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 05:41 PM
121

You really can’t “have it all” and be in a relationship with a man. They need you to be a little bit less than them somewhere along the line. It’s pathetic. And the men who I find impressive, who are “more” than me still want women who don’t shine as brightly. This is probably why parents have always discouraged girl children from being outspoken or adventurous or confident. Women like that never get “picked”.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 04:20 PM
296

I’m funnier than them and they hate it. I don’t even try. I’m just sharp with words and timing, while they feel the need to be loud and obnoxious and overly critical of things. That’s what they think is funny. Making fun of things that people are clearly enjoying. A friend of mine dated a struggling comedian for a bit and I used to hang out with them sometimes. Hand to god, he would use snarky things I would say in his material, and pass it off as his own clever observations. I would never get u…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 04:01 PM
8

I want to be homely so I can get a husband (with assets), so I can inherit his assets and receive his pension and such when I inevitably outlive him. I used to work in wealth management and was just amazed at how many of these frumpy old ladies had never worked a day in their lives, but were worth more than I ever would be because they got married young to successful men. Granted, they probably suffered for it a little bit. But damn. Wouldn’t it be nice to be 70, still spry, and being able to en…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 03:17 PM
144

This is excellent! Also, he knew what he was doing. That’s their way of doing a temperature check on how they can test your boundaries. The last guy who did that to me would even kind of smirk like he was daring me to say something. I didn’t. I just carried on being polite (and quiet) company for my safety and blocked him immediately once we parted ways. I hear all these stories about women “calling men out”. It’s a complete waste of energy. Every man I’ve ever stood up to just had a dumbfounded…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 01:22 PM
36

In that case, you’ll never really know. Both of these guys were vetted for several months. Situations like this are why I gave up. They require way too much risk management on our end and it’s never worth it. It’s exhausting. You can wait 3, 4, 6 months to be intimate with a man you’ve been seeing and still be told you should’ve done something differently when his skin suit comes apart at the seams. I have a theory that there are actually no HVM. They’re just that way long enough until they don’…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 07:43 AM
6

I know. But I had very specific reasons for wanting to have a family of my own. Not in the abstract, but something very tangible. I had to grieve that loss. I can accept failure that is my fault. It was difficult to accept failure to have a family due to men refusing to be base level adequate. I don’t think we acknowledge that reality enough. “Don’t worry about it. You can do this/that instead” is solid advice, but it’s okay for us to be a little sad about how disappointing men are. Like your pa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 07:36 AM
8

True, which is more likely than not. So family and motherhood are just things I don’t get to experience. Not because of my own actions and life choices, but because of men’s. It makes me hate them, honestly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 07:24 AM
13

I know. I really wanted to foster/adopt, too. It’s just that I am diametrically opposed to single motherhood. If I become a widow or if divorce happens, that’s one thing. But to go through an entire pregnancy alone and the logistics of being emotionally present 24/7 for a human being from birth through college graduation all alone and on one income? No life insurance payout or SSI benefits due to dad dying on us? No child support or visitation schedule that has the other parent tagging in/out fr…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 07:14 AM
28

I’ve tried to explain it this way to friends and they know it makes sense, but they don’t seem to care. I’m like,”Please explain to me what you’re proving when a man you met on an app a week ago is having sex with you after you paid for your own dinner and now you’re driving yourself back home?” “I know, but he seems really sweet...” FDS is an oasis.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 06:58 AM
10

“The only competition is myself” EXACTLY. I wish people understood this really basic principle. More people would be so much happier.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 06:49 AM
34

Girl. Sis. Girl. OMG... I did an experiment with two men I’ve dated who were sweet and I liked, but didn’t feel sexually compatible with. I thought maybe if I “taught” them what I liked, we could be good. Guy #1: While fooling around, he moved his hand down into my panties. Cool. I literally put my hand on top of his and said,”Follow my lead”. All he had to do was follow instructions. Did he do that? No. He treated my clit like a Bop-It. Okay, bye. Guy #2: Same deal. But instead of being rough, …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 06:47 AM
14

Yep. Biological clock go brrrr. I was willing to give 30something LVM a chance thinking each time that might be my last chance at getting to have a family. Now that I’ve given up hope, it’s painful but freeing. And I will settle for nothing less than a handsome, fit plaything if I am to ever let another man touch me again. These average-looking, horseshoe-headed dadbods have so much audacity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 06:26 AM
59

I was like,”No, I didn’t really have a good time, and I don’t see this going anywhere. But I didn’t want to spoil your evening (he was celebrating a career milestone). So I’m glad to hear you did.” He says,”Yeah. I don’t think so either, but I did have a good time, so thanks for that.” All he cared about was that he got his. What a fucking metaphor. Haha!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 06:15 AM
83

This happened to me on my last date. The next day he asked me if I enjoyed myself and I said no. It was awful. He knew it was awful. He just wanted me to say something nice to boost his ego. Now I understand why men used to say,”The pleasure is all mine” in old TV shows and movies. They knew.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 05:47 AM
80

They do this now, I’ve noticed. Who started this trend?! Bumble is the Harvard of low effort males in OLD, I had to finally accept.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 05:44 AM
49

Never in my girlhood could I have ever imagined there could be such a large demographic of paunchy, balding, eternally flaccid, unconditioned beard-wearing, oily concrete-textured skin, Under Armour-coated specimen with abysmal social graces and zero capacity to love being so damned avoidant when they do finally meet a woman who is willing to tolerate them. And from what I remember in OLD when 35-38 year old idiots were making me want to pull my hair out and I set the age range up to 49...it get…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 05:38 AM
15

They love that. I’m the exact same way as you. Cool as a cucumber. They interpret it as lack of interest or say they “just didn’t feel a connection”. No. I’m just not about to get into an emotionally charged argument with you because you want me to feel insecure and prove myself. Now that I think about it, that might be why they’re so quick to tell us how awful their exes were. So we feel compelled to prove how much better and different we are.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 05:25 AM
9

That’s what they prefer, so that’s what they deserve. I never feel bad about hearing “she screwed me over” stories anymore. Men have the upper hand in dating where they can literally pick one of any number of phenomenal women (since we out number them). And they consistently chase after the 5% that are the worst of us, while trying to shame us for holding out for the only 5% of them who are worth the trouble. Cool. Enjoy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 05:18 AM
39

I agree with all of this. I think the different interpretations of “value” are what has complicated things. Some lurking nobody requested a chat with me the other day with the question: “Maybe you’re having such a hard time finding a good man because you’re not as high value as you think?” I just declined chat and blocked him. That wasn’t the first time some anonymous male has said this to me, though, and it made me think about how much easier it is for men to find fault in a woman they know not…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 05:02 AM
8

Yep. But they will not shut up about this. They treat us based off of what their perception of us is, not who we actually are.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 04:56 AM
5

This. Also where does he live? I just wanna talk.🤜
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 04:53 AM
5

💜💜💜💜
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 04:48 AM
25

Giving chances because I wanted a family, and I figured I would have to settle like all women do in order to achieve that. COVID ruined that, but I guess saved me at the same time. I don’t feel comfortable bringing a baby into this kind of world anymore. So the pressure is off, in that regard.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 04:47 AM
31

We are not allowed to have flaws or bad days. One wrong move and they’re gone. I had a guy ghost me, because I asked for a rain check on a second date after a very horrible day at work. And things were way too new with him to be dumping on him, emotionally. He interpreted it as me not being interested and did that save face thing,”Well I don’t think this would’ve worked out anyway. Good luck.” Fragile. Had I shown up on the date venting (I was very upset that day), he would’ve accused me of bein…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 04:28 AM
87

I feel like crying tears of relief. Thank you for verbalizing what keeps happening to me repeatedly. It is emotionally draining and retraumatizing. But I learned to pick up on the signs early, so it wouldn’t happen again. And also to stop engaging men altogether to avoid getting absolutely destroyed emotionally once per quarter. Them: OMG! You’re amazing! I want you. I want to be with you. Me: No, you don’t. They all say that. Please just leave me alone. Please. Them: Oh they weren’t real men. T…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 04:21 AM
23

I am so incredibly jealous of you. They don’t deserve to so much as breathe in our presence, let alone touch our bodies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 04:01 AM
17

I’ve been on the receiving end of similar sentiments from a “friend”. I’ve been called a pickme, too. Being attractive and friendly at the same time seems to be a lose-lose for us. Men assume we’re open for business. Insecure women assume we’re just trying too hard. Although, my friendships with women have grown stronger since I stopped dealing with men. Because I’m no longer “competition”, perhaps? The older I get, the more I understand why so many older, elegant beauties I knew of growing up s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 04:00 AM
22

He’s not attractive enough to be this entitled. There, I said it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 02:38 AM
11

COVID stole my last year of valuable dating time in order to get married and pregnant within a reasonable timeframe that would not scare off a man AND where I’m not trying to shed baby weight, while changing diapers in my 40s. So thanks for that, COVID. Will never forget it. This skit was the most relatable thing I’ve seen on SNL in a very long time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 02:36 AM
160

I used to believe this. I always end up in this kind of scenario where they clearly recognize I’m a prize and are very excited to have me in their lives, put me on a pedestal, then quickly become uncomfortable with that dynamic and knock me down off of it before scurrying off to be with a less “threatening” woman. I always thought,”Okay, he’s really into me, so he’ll really treat me well and put in the effort to keep me. I can finally let my guard down. This one is a keeper.” Nope. They. Never. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 02:25 AM
67

As comical and ridiculous as some of these seem, they’re equally hurtful. Men have just always hated us. Even when we literally had no choice but to rely on them. They hated us when they created and enforced laws that said we NEEDED them. So, no. Feminism isn’t what has them angry at us now. They’ve just always been hateful overgrown babies. I don’t imagine I’ll ever allow one to touch me ever again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 12:46 AM
34

I hate that they pit us against each other, while basically treating us equally terrible. “Men only want to date hot women. If you’re not attractive, you’re invisible.” They want to have sex with and be seen publicly with hot women, but that’s it. They choose plainer-looking women for LTRs and marriage. Being lusted after incessantly, while also being denied commitment for most of my adult life, I started researching this. Read somewhere that it’s a biological thing that goes back to prehistoric…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 12:19 AM
4

That makes me feel sick. I’m sorry.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 10:17 PM
58

I once had a boyfriend who I just knew was going to be The One, was super into me, treated me like a Queen, thought I was an absolute goddess...until we had sex for the first time and he kept losing his erection. I was very considerate and non-judgmental when I asked him if there was a problem, and said I was willing to work through it with him. He was too embarrassed to admit it and wouldn’t even talk about it, and dumped me the very next day. I blocked him immediately and didn’t even cry. I wa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 07:23 PM
5

A woman referring to other women as “incels” in mixed company will never sit right with me. I hope she comes around. ETA: I do think of this article sometimes, though: https://www.huckmag.com/art-and-culture/tech/meet-the-women-of-the-incel-movement/
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 06:46 PM
13

100% this. You deserve to drop a Cash App link after that message.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 06:22 PM
81

Pain and control. They only seem to enjoy sex with us if they feel like they’re taking it from us or manipulating us into giving in to them. Everytime I’ve been dating a man and given any indication that I was attracted to them and felt physical desire for them, it’s like they stopped being interested. And I’m not even talking about throwing myself at them or anything. It’s kind of like they’re dogs barking and chasing after cars. And when the car stops, they run back to their yards with their t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 06:18 PM
20

They can’t read or suffer from cognitive dissonance. Even women. Some guy in a dating sub posted about FDS and said it was one-sided manhating. I was like,”Nope. If you actually read the content, you’ll realize it’s not about men so much as it is about avoiding the dangerous ones and living our best lives.” Some woman (I looked at her comment history) replied to me,”No. They’re all incels.” I’m grateful to have found this space and I’m glad that other woman can find it easily, but part of me doe…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 05:22 PM
30

If I see one more “look at my grandparents married for 80 years of true love” viral post, I will scream.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 05:12 PM
4

That’s really good idea! I could share my goodies with a local women’s shelter. Uh-oh, look at us being domestic and doing volunteer work. We’re gonna get “picked”. Haha! It’s just funny to me because I’ve seen so many man on dating subs toss that out to perfectly fine women who simply express frustration with dating: “Men don’t care about a pretty face. Or your career. Are you easy to talk to you? Do you make him laugh? Can you hold a conversation? Men don’t like boring women. You should volunt…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 03:41 PM
5

That is disgusting. I’m so sorry. And exactly what you said: this man manipulated you and destroyed your mental health. That’s precisely what he did to me, but she wanted to keep tagging him in posts and sharing memes. On the one hand, I’m all about solidarity with women. On the other, once they cross that line, I don’t really feel bad about whatever happens to them. These guys probably got off on knowing they hurt us, but were still able to get attention from our friends. Thereby invalidating o…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 02:46 PM
7

I wouldn’t doubt it. I didn’t even bother looking at the comments, because I fully expected to see misogynistic slurs. I once had a man recall a story to me in line at a store and he referred to his own wife as “stupid” for emphasis, several times. If they’re willing to talk about their own wives like that, then made up internet ladies get no mercy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 02:12 PM
5

Oh for sure. I’ve seen this happen so much in real life, though. Women who cheat, drain bank accounts, go on weekend drug benders and leave the kids unattended while he’s at work, and he’s “fighting for the marriage”. That’s what men will accept. But if we try to discuss our routine experiences with attempted date rape or coercion, suddenly it’s,”Tsk tsk, ladies. Not all men. I’m a good man, and my ex did me wrong. Women can be just as bad.” They lack self-awareness.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 02:08 PM
13

You must live near me, because this is what the apps looked like.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 01:58 PM
29

How do you advocate for people who don’t want your advocacy? Serious question. I would be livid if I were sticking my neck out for women who largely responded to me this way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 01:47 PM
28

When women tell me they met a “great guy” on OLD, I assume they’re lying to me (and to themselves) to avoid the reality that they have compromised their standards immensely.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 01:45 PM
32

ALL OF THIS! I’m not a Nice Girl™️ by any means, but I don’t like those games, either. Why can’t I be a decent human being to a man who I like? For example, I’m heavy into baking, and there’s no way I can eat it all without creating waste, so I’m always making breads, cookies, cakes, quirky dessert dishes I’ve seen on shows, etc and sharing with my coworkers, neighbors, and friends. Even sometimes with men I date. It’s literally just an,”Oh by the way, here’s something you might like” not a “I s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 01:40 PM
6

I don’t display mine at all, but the absence of couple selfies or posts about having an SO imply I’m alone. Number one rule of social media: Nobody will know that you’re desirable and valuable if you’re not oversharing your relationship details 24/7. Ha! And that “friend” is disgusting. But that’s awesome how you turned it around on him. I mean, isn’t that the truth? We don’t keep male friends around who we secretly hope to end up with someday. They take all of their cues from Hollywood. Weirdos…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 01:23 PM
15

This is an interesting perspective. Thank you for sharing. And so glad you both got out.💜
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 01:07 PM
11

Ha! Exactly what I was thinking, honestly. Once I realized I was too old to have a family, I started dating childfree men. But they weren’t that impressive to me. I thought if he can’t give me my white picket fence life, he should at least be sexy and interesting, so we can be that hot couple that hosts fabulous parties and travels all the time. You can imagine how that turned out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 01:04 PM
3

Understandable. I appreciate you phrasing it this way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 12:35 PM
8

There you go! I still dislike boys from junior high on behalf of friends of mine. I’ve been trying to share FDS principles with some of my girls, but the magnetic pull of male validation is far too strong. I can’t say I blame them. I remember being in that headspace and having women openly treating me with such judgment and scorn simply because I was lonely and wanted male companionship. Telling me I was being silly. I don’t want to come off like that to anyone. You don’t recruit for your team b…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 12:27 PM
4

What I was “trying to say” was in the actual title of the post. Not being snarky, I promise. I just thought it was obvious.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 11:59 AM
10

I can’t see most of the comments for some reason. This is actually a repost, because I didn’t have the sub names blurred in the first one. And someone made a comment similar to yours on the original. I’ll try to paraphrase what I replied to her. I totally agree that the way she is treating him is not relationship-appropriate. But I don’t feel sorry for him at all. Men beat us over the head with rhetoric, insisting that we must be single because we’re not docile little lambs who are easy to get a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 11:56 AM
62

Absolutely. I’ve noticed this only in the past couple of years. That even in these pathetic “derp derp...my wife is the boss of me” monologues these guys trot out for neighbors and coworkers, the man is usually still the breadwinner or has somewhat of an advantage over the wife. She has health problems that require his insurance or would make it challenging for her to live without him, lots of small children (so harder for her to up and leave him for another man), younger (and more impressionabl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 06:13 AM
27

Oh, I’m so sorry. I know that emotionally drained feeling. I’m going through this with someone now. Trying to detach slowly and carefully. She knows a lot about me and could screenshot things I’ve shared in confidence that could really be used to humiliate me. No flaming out, no confrontation. Clean break, I hope. Good luck to you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 06:01 AM
79

That last part has always been my experience. Every man who has ever treated me like a queen has turned out to be abusive or avoidant. It’s to the point now where I just don’t trust that they can be kind or good at all. And...good on you for being receptive to her instead of getting defensive and giving her “I told you so” screenshot fodder for later on. You dodged a grenade.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 05:50 AM
104

It confounds the mind. A man will dump a perfect woman who he loves if his friends tell him she farted in public once. A woman will be pulled aside by every person she has known and loved for her entire life and told,”We don’t trust him. He’s no good for you” and just ignore all of them to move in with some guy she met on Tinder a month ago. Why are we like this?????
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 05:42 AM
92

This and we’re just starting to develop. It’s the “perfect” stage for a sick man to start taking notice: baby faces, innocence, naïveté, and shiny new womanly parts. A fresh crop of 3D porn tags walking around in the community. I remember when I stopped being allowed to wear certain things that are normal for a girl child to wear for fear of attracting the wrong kind of attention from grown men. This makes me wary of every male teacher I had in junior high now.🙁
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 05:24 AM
140

This world is not safe for girls and women. It makes me sick. Maybe it’s a good thing I haven’t met anyone worthy enough to marry and breed with. I’ve always wanted to experience a non-abusive mother-daughter dynamic. But the more I hear, the more I realize she would never be safe on this planet.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 05:16 AM
141

Old skin cannot be taught new tricks, I’ve heard.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 04:59 AM
83

Oh my gosh, that’s unsettling. I’m shivering from the creeps. It’s funny you mentioned the church thing. I was raised deeply conservative and religious. My parents had a very strict no-hugging policy for boys when I was a teen until I had a serious boyfriend they trusted and requires supervision. I will never forget an older clergy member who i had grown up alongside his daughter my same age and we trusted him, came up to me during fellowship and hugged me “full frontal” and embraced me for more…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 04:58 AM
144

THIS! They tell me they don’t ever want kids, but still want sexual access to me. “Okay, so do you have a vasectomy?” “No. I guess I never thought about it.” What an unsnipped childfree man is really saying is,”I want a wife and kids, but I don’t have the emotional depth to admit that, so I’m willing to get you pregnant accidentally on purpose so I can pretend you trapped me in domesticity.” I’ve been saying this for years. Men don’t want babies. But they secretly want them waaaaay more than we …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 04:50 AM
66

Oh my gosh. That quote made me ill. As a girl who was taller than average and “developed” early I got that a lot. I had such a baby face, still. A lanky baby, with boobs. Puberty is such a mindf—k.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 04:45 AM
54

Whoa...another memory coming flooding back. My BFF had a Sweet 16. Her parents booked the reception hall in their condo community. We were having fun. Then some man shows up and starts flirting with some of us. Apparently he was staying at a hotel across the street. Saw all the cars and commotion and decided to come on in. The entrance gates weren’t closed, because so many guests were coming for the event. I distinctly remember him giving me his number in his hotel room on a slip of paper. We di…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 04:42 AM
15

Ohhhh, you don’t want to know. Handsome, interesting, well-adjusted childfree men are copypasta as far as I’m concerned.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 04:34 AM
79

I’m meeting more and more decidedly childfree men. Thank heavens. They realize childcare and healthcare are already expensive enough in the US. Also, in most cases I’ve personally encountered they are sparing the gene pool. I support that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 04:26 AM
5

Oh, I definitely agree. This is not a good sign for future progression. But...this is what they choose and fight to hang on to, then want to compare their voluntary experiences with women to the horrors we’re subjected to on a routine basis.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 04:19 AM
335

A man literally followed me around a mall when I was 12. He asked me for my number and I said no and that I was 12. He said,”That’s okay.” I walked away to try to rejoin my friend group and he f-ing followed me,”Hey wait hold up!” It still gives me chills. Thank goodness it was a public place. I will never forget what he looked like. Thank goodness also he was massively out of shape and could barely keep up with me. I was walking pretty briskly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 04:17 AM
5

He’s adorable. Even if this is a character and he’s pandering, it’s still entertaining and honest.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 04:13 AM
13

A friend of mine theorizes that the speed in which he met and proposed to Amal was a reaction to Stacy Kiebler’s pregnancy/engagement announcement. They had been broken up a little over a year at the time, I believe. ETA: She wanted marriage and kids. He didn’t. Then she finds a man who wants to marry her and have a baby with her. And suddenly George wants to be Family Man? We’ve seen this in the wild. 2013 - https://www.nydailynews.com/entertainment/gossip/george-clooney-stacy-keibler-split-rep…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 04:01 AM
115

This is all of my friends. Every last one. I’ve already cut men out. I can’t lose them, too. But I just can’t bear to be around this nonsense.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 02:45 AM
21

I’m very grateful to never have to hear,”Well actually...” ever again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 12:53 AM
38

Yes. This is basically it. Anything we choose to do that isn’t driven by the approval of or doesn’t somehow benefit a man is wrong.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 12:53 AM
16

I just finished replying to someone like this above. It’s disappointing to see that kind of energy in a space that is supposed to be safe for likeminded women, but humans are gonna human. That’s what the block feature is for.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 12:51 AM
20

You clearly want a conflict, but you won’t get one from me. I truly hope whatever is really bothering you can be resolved for you quickly. Be well.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 12:47 AM
2

“Ghosted after intimacy” This comment hit me like a drive-by. Lol! And I know of so many others with the exact same experience.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 12:40 AM
13

Good for you!💜 I swear, it makes my chest tight to hear grown women say what their husbands/boyfriends “won’t allow”.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 12:06 AM
31

There is a difference between being a pickme and being a genuine tomboy, which I politely explained in response to your original query. You’re entitled to disagree, of course, and to your own interpretation of my words. It would be inappropriate for me to invalidate another woman’s womanhood, just because she doesn’t perform my exact brand of femininity. That’s a slippery, classist slope that I’m not comfortable riding.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 11:57 PM
39

Being a burping, farting, cussing, scrapping woman is valid. There are some rough around the edges gals out there. So I don’t want to challenge their womanhood, because they aren’t finishing school graduates. I attended finishing school. Ha! But I don’t feel like it was stupid or a waste. Learning those skills as a girl helped me develop poise, confidence, and grace at an early age. And being a polished woman doing business with people from all over the world has been helpful in my career progre…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 10:40 PM
14

This is horrifying. I hope she finds her way out. I was looking on a mom sub earlier today and was absolutely disgusted. Is this really how it is out there? Yikes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 10:24 PM
51

This is an accurate description of this person. In addition to being a mother of sons, and basking in the glow of being Woman of the (Frat) House. Cussing and burping and scrapping alongside the boys. It’s a valid identity, so I don’t want to take anything away from that. But I can’t befriend women like that anymore. They stress me out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 09:29 PM
17

California King bed is goals! I’m being inspired so much today. Hopefully my cabin in the woods of Vermont will have enough space for one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 09:21 PM
35

Haha! She’s gorgeous! They are so transparent. Can’t even neg properly anymore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 09:20 PM
12

This is my new life goal. Thank you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 09:14 PM
72

Oh, I know. I have a toolbox of sorts. Haha! But I am still human. I miss being kissed and stroked and all of that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 09:04 PM
22

Right? It stood out to me that even in the fictional context of that time period, a woman her age was being portrayed as beautiful, sophisticated, and desirable for second marriage. Good job, Weiner and co. Also Betty hopping out of one marriage with three kids (including an infant) with a better man waiting to marry her immediately. WTF? I’ve seen that happen in real life, though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 09:03 PM
54

This...I had to cancel a trip I had planned for myself, because a man that I had started seeing shortly after I booked it wouldn’t have been able to afford to join me or even pay half. I mentioned it to him and he even offered to pay half, but as we got closer to the date...he talked more about all the things we could do on the trip together while he also stopped talking about paying for anything, and actually had the nerve to try to have sex with me. It was an eye-opening experience. I’m no Van…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 08:28 PM
24

Even if it’s hollow and superficial, it’s more than I get. My mother is probably the most manipulative, abusive woman I’ve ever encountered. But she gets away with it, because of her sweet veneer and because she has a husband. My dad knows it and has always looked the other way. I distinctly remember begging and crying out for him to intervene while she dragged me to my bedroom to beat me for some unknown offense. He buried his head in the paper he was reading in his chair,”I’m not involved in t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 08:18 PM
232

Oooh, this. And drop women who entertain LVM. They can’t be trusted. A man kept me on that “you’re great but just not enough for me to commit yet” emotional hamster wheel for almost a year before I smartened up and walked away. A female “friend” I had known for years who I introduced him to in the first place continues to be friendly with him and the new women he’s been exploiting. I would never explicitly ask for her to stop speaking to him, because that would be childish. But I assumed my bein…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 07:57 PM
41

Gemini man. Checks out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 07:19 PM
61

When I hear a coworker say,”My husband doesn’t let me...” it kinds of snaps me back into reality. It’ll be over something as simple as wearing animal prints or buying a pink toy for a boy child. And I think to myself,”Wow, she gets to have companionship and (latent) emotional support but that’s the price, huh? Welp. No, thanks.” It’s also frustrating the way married and coupled women are allowed to behave in a professional setting. If I were to ever raise my voice, roll my eyes, or insult a coll…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 07:12 PM
93

This! There’s this book called It’s Not You (27 Wrong Reasons Why You’re Single) by Sara Eckel and I appreciate that she laid out all the reasons people toss out, without blaming men or even centering them at any point. She kind of said without saying that women have very few options when it comes to dating men. GREAT women have even fewer options and take even longer to find suitable partners, so much that we’re at the point where we have to decide between biological motherhood and partnership …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 06:31 PM
19

Oooh same! One of them tried to weasel his way back in a few days before VDay. It’s kind of orgasmic to ignore them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 06:26 PM
98

Yessss! I was looking at her hair the whole time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 06:22 PM
25

I’m definitely going to die alone. Learning to be okay with it. I’m definitely kicking and screaming on the inside (with a sexy, polished exterior). I still vacillate between “This is the way” and “ZOMG! I’m everything a man could possibly want! Why don’t they want me?!” and I want that to stop. I need to accept my fate. My friends are all married, coupled, or aggressively relaxing their standards in order to accommodate men who don’t deserve to be dating them. It’s stressful to watch. To be thi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 06:15 PM
143

Not to hijack this thread, but this is why I’ve been rethinking the George and Amal Clooney thing. At the time, I found it really inspiring. Because a “serious” woman with beauty and brains and her own career was able to compel a man like that to commit. A man who had been discarding 20something models and actresses for years. Not implying those aren’t serious professions, but I don’t find them as relatable as I do law and business (my field). Anyway, I used to think Amal was “so lucky”. Now I d…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 06:06 PM
82

This. But I’m still finding myself caught in the crossfire. Because I have friends who have lowered their standards in order to get men and it’s really frustrating to watch. I would pretty much have to go off grid and live solo to escape the influence of useless males.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 05:58 PM
195

This might sound problematic, but I’m very relieved to see conventionally attractive women say this shit aloud. Growing up, the perception of single women (especially past a certain age) was that no man wanted them because they weren’t appealing. Even now, men try to use that excuse. I’ve even been “complimented” with that argument, that certainly I should have my pick of the cream of the crop men and my solitude is simply me being “too picky”. To be fair, men are largely lacking in standards an…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 05:55 PM
49

This was my question as well. Sounds like you had a lot of big things on the horizon that he may not be ready for and was just looking for a reason to get out beforehand. I’ve seen men fight to hang on to women who literally went out and got pregnant by other men. Nothing gets rid of a man unless he just doesn’t want you anymore. I’m so sorry if this isn’t helpful. But I know that drowning feeling all too well. It happened to me in my last relationship when something similar was going on. We wer…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 05:29 PM
47

Yep. Single women are only allowed to operate on two settings as far as Les Pickmois are concerned: seething with jealousy at their codependent, toxic relationships or lonely whores eagerly trying to fill our emotional voids (and vaginas) with the inadequate penises of the men they settled for. You hate to see it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 05:21 PM
22

Same. It is just plain upsetting to know that I let such undeserving specimen touch me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 04:54 PM
157

Yeah. She knows it, but it doesn’t matter. She got picked. Must save face by posting baby and happy couple selfies on social media for the express purpose of flexing on the rest of us. I have no doubt she posted some smug smiley pic with the three of them later that evening with the caption “Fun day...love my boys/he loves his girls” (depending on baby’s gender, of course).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 04:52 PM
468

Women in relationships like this love throwing it in my face that I’m single and childless, and actually feel sorry for me. As much as it hurts that I don’t get to have a family, having a family with a man like this (which is more common than not) seems infinitely worse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 04:37 PM
287

This is where I am, and based off of the feedback I’ve been getting from threads and my DMs, celibacy is pretty much the only option for a high quality woman with healthy self-esteem and boundaries. I enjoy sex and I do miss it, but I haven’t been able to have it in quite some time, because I haven’t met a man who wasn’t a low effort predator to some degree.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 02:31 PM
3

Men don’t get it. And neither do women, honestly. The assumption for men is that if you’re a pretty woman, you should have no problem “getting laid”. That’s the bar for them. I want to be held at night and served breakfast in bed on anniversaries and nursed through chemo. LOVE. Plainer looking women assume that of you’re pretty then men will want to do those things for you. That they will “step up”. No they do not. Sometimes I honestly think about how much less I would be rejected for commitment…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/21 08:56 PM
205

Basically what triggered me about that comic strip post. I’m perfectly polite and playful and warm, while also giving off respectable energy, but they don’t consider me for commitment and don’t want to let their guards down around me because I’m hot and I know it. Had a guy in my social group flirt and dodge asking me out for well over a year after we met before finally confessing in my DMs one day,”You’re so beautiful. And you know it.” No follow up message. The last guy I went on a date with s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/21 06:11 PM
14

I can recognize that, too. And I meant to add it to the reply above. I don’t overdo anything. Just a natural beauty, wild hair and barefaced when I wake up. I have a pretty face, and knowing this is partially why I default to kindness. Because why not? People sometimes expect me to be a b—-h just based on my appearance. And when they realize I’m not, it’s one less stranger in the world. I’ve had men giggling and stumbling speechless on dating app video chats,”OMG! You actually look like your pic…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/21 03:43 PM
6

That makes sense to “dress down” on a first date. I can’t turn off the charm, though. I’m the kind of person who the wait staff will slip free dessert and drinks. I’ve been out with a man and had other men just walk up to me and start conversation. I’m not some glamazon. Just pretty, put together, and with a magnetic aura. People love me. I don’t do anything out of the ordinary. I’m literally just polite and friendly and easy af to get along with. Now that I’m talking this out...I can see how th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/21 03:27 PM
38

This comic was triggering as hell, and could easily be me. This is the only male attention I get. I’m thoughtful, smart, and funny also, but men don’t look at me as a human being at all. Just a f—kable trophy. One of two things usually happens: 1) they realize I’m not about to have sex with them after one date, or that I have standards and expectations for courtship and they find an excuse to disappear. 2)They aren’t confident enough to pursue me romantically, so they give me the “you’re an amaz…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/21 02:34 PM
11

Yes, girl! You’re gorgeous. These men are silly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/01/21 07:04 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter