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VerifiableLemongrass Archive

View 0 posts and 36 comments by VerifiableLemongrass on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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27

I was aware of the manosphere since around when I started dating. It mostly made me more adamant about having firm boundaries. I never dated a stranger, the guy had to be known to me to accept, and I refused to have sex without commitment, partially to filter out the time wasters who would never commit.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/23 11:38 AM
1

Sort of? I still think that "I have needs" tends to lead to "vibrator". A FWB/situationship shouldn't have the orgasm problem, but there's a high risk of emotional entanglement with a man who views you as "not good enough". A lot of women do seem to try that route, but I'm not sure how often it's because of raw libido vs trying to obtain companionship. Definitely, both happen, but I'm not sure of the ratio.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/23 06:17 AM
5

Masturbating is much better for women orgasming than casual sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/23 05:10 AM
1

Wait, men still find spinning and weaving attractive in an industrialized society?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/23 02:24 AM
1

If you're beating yourself up on a meta level, you've definitely gone too far.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/23 02:23 AM
2

He's got a fashion industry type face. Really prominent bone structure, low body fat.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/23 11:24 PM
3

I can see how that would be frustrating, but try to remember that it doesn't mean her attraction isn't genuine. I've never been physically aroused from just looking at men, no matter how perfect they look. But a perfect male voice? That does it for me. So maybe try to reframe it in your head. You might be attractive because of mind, physique, voice, etc. Try to focus on the positive.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/23 10:12 PM
–

It's not morally wrong for you to go to them, but they're extremely unlikely to get you any dates. A lot of people don't do well with bars though. I feel like they attracted much broader range of people pre-internet.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/23 05:03 AM
–

Miami is a flashy place: you'll want to keep up to get any attention.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/23 12:42 AM
–

Your background sounds like some of my cousins. I definitely agree that the paranoia over gold diggers is silly, most women aren't. But you can definitely find them if you go looking. If you're open to career women, I actually think you could start having quite a lot of success pretty soon. A really high percentage of high earning women have zero interest in men who aren't in a similar or better financial situation. This isn't gold digging because these women are often not particularly intereste…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/23 12:33 AM
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But like, personality, character, goals in life? The Arab idea was about getting a woman entirely based on money. And honestly, the sort of money you're talking about you don't need to go abroad to get a woman based on wealth. But then you've built a relationship only on money, and that's obviously got downsides.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/23 10:27 PM
–

Oh, I totally get why an international marriage based on heritage might not be your ideal. There's a culture clash element. But the plan you talked about definitely introduces way more culture clash, and adds religious issues to it all. It doesn't fix the problems with using an Indian matchmaker and it adds way more. Unless you're actually really drawn to Islam. But it doesn't sound like you are. What are you looking for anyway?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/23 09:53 PM
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Women. That many men complimenting me would make me anxious.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/23 08:13 PM
–

Why not just find an Indian woman if you're already looking out of the country? Pretty sure your friend just wants you to convert.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/23 08:08 PM
–

Highly variable based both on woman and on dating method. If all she know is those two things, like on OLD, she'll be pickier than if she knows you for other appealing traits.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/23 07:08 PM
3

I always felt like it was sort of an age thing. Well, if there's too big of a gap, it's just sort of not very enjoyable for anyone, because you're just never on the same page of a conversation. I've found that guys 25+ sometimes find it a matter of incompatibility (they're rarely obnoxious about it though), but other times it's what gets their attention, or turns their attention serious. But teenage boys hate dating smarter than themselves, and perhaps that impression sticks. Idk, it's been a su…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/23 07:39 AM
1

I would describe the "ick" as a very visceral sort of disgust, often combined with a hint of fear or wrongness. If it's less instinctual and more rational I don't call it the ick, but some women might. Like, a guy being an asshole doesn't usually give me the ick, it's just annoying and unpleasant. I rarely get the ick just from being around a guy, but I used to get it very easily whenever I'd try anything the least bit sexual, until I got together with my now husband.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/23 12:37 AM
3

We have research showing that waist hip ratio is really, really important. So your best weight is likely the one with the best waist hip ratio (which is also correlated with health!) Some cultures and individuals are more into somewhat higher or lower weights. The fashion world is very into super thin, and the backlash against it pushes the fat look. And there are men into both looks! But it's not the ideal for most.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/23 03:31 PM
2

Being a mom is really magical. Hard, but magical. I really don't identify with the commonly mentioned benefits though. I was never allowed to vomit emotion, and I've had much more experience with male strength being used against me than to support me.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/23 02:40 PM
2

In an industrialized society, being poor and having kids involves being on benefits. Many people are not cool with making choices that they know will require them to rely on public assistance. The big expense with kids is either lost wages or paying for daycare. Those are both big deal expenses! The rest is more flexible, sure. Toys and clothing can be obtained at extremely low cost. But insurance, housing, medical bills, transportation, food, diapers, aren't cheap. And if breastfeeding goes wro…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/23 05:35 AM
5

I think the bigger issue is that the finances don't work out for having kids in your 20s for most women. Okay, so you have a young woman who's decided to focus on kids before career. She needs to find a good partner quickly and young, which is very hard unless she's very religious, and he needs to be able to support her as a SAHM for a few years, because if her career isn't off the ground yet, no way does paying for daycare make any sense at all. Either she's marrying a man who's doing extremely…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/23 03:41 AM
1

That would drive me insane.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/23 02:29 AM
3

It's a few factors. I do think women have a genuinely lower libido on average. We're still talking overlapping curves though: the high libido outliers will be men, and the low libido outliers will be women, but lots of both in the middle. Separately from the high-low axis, I'd also say there's the spontaneous-responsive axis, and I think the gender gap here is probably larger. Men seem to struggle a lot if they want to not think about sex. A woman with a very responsive libido won't think much a…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/23 02:19 AM
1

Habits are hard to change. Are there any concrete measures she's willing to take? Her goal can't be "spend less", it needs to be more like "make and stick to a budget" or "stop buying a certain thing". My friend with a bad spending problem didn't want to figure it out so she got rid of her credit cards and her husband has final say over their finances. It's not a solution I'd enjoy, but it keeps her out of debt.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/02/23 12:43 AM
8

I think it's also about how the wealth is generated. In an industrialized society, children cost a lot of money and when they start actually making money, they move out. In pre-industrial societies, there's more work that can be done near or with children, and more work children can do reasonably safely. So children are not necessarily going to make your finances worse in such a society. Or rather, there's a temporary hit but then in a few years they can bring in actual money. Urbanization also …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/23 11:12 PM
5

Including places that no one sane would accuse of being feminist paradises. Iran has a birth rate of 1.71
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/23 11:01 PM
2

So, I do think this is really cool, but it's only good for dating if you're around intellectuals or trying to get set up with a nice girl by your mom's friends. As others have said, conventional instruments have broader appeal. On the other hand, for any young women who does find all of this appealing, she'll probably find it extremely appealing.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/23 09:42 PM
2

It's fine as long as it's a financially responsible choice. At a certain income bracket, I think it's sort of expected, really. You should know how to wash dishes and clean laundry and stuff in a pinch. Helplessness is bad. But paying for cleaning help when you can afford it is sort of a no-brainer for quality of life.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/02/23 07:41 PM
1

The birth control pill is wild. I've definitely found it murders my libido. Like, I go from an ideal of multiple times a week to just about never. So it's always seemed sort of pointless, because I don't really have sex if I'm on it... Mind, I think men are much hornier than women in general. But the pill definitely doesn't help.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/02/23 01:43 AM
6

Also physical risk. Dealing with one well off nerd who wants to fuck sounds pretty safe. A bunch of random men? Not so much. Prostitution is not known to a be safe job.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/23 05:14 PM
3

A monogamous sex partner and a stable family life are both good reasons. They might be seen as unfashionable by some people, but most people still ultimately want that life, at least eventually. Yeah, people who don't care about monogamy or having children have relatively little incentive to be in a relationship. I think that's a minority of people though.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/23 04:29 PM
1

Didn't someone find survey data on this before? I remember seeing a chart showing that men, regardless of age, tend to find 18-20 year olds hottest (which isn't the same as wanting to date them, that's a more complicated question). Women mostly find men close to their own age most attractive, preferring a bit older (a few years, nothing crazy) when young and slightly younger when older.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/23 12:51 AM
15

That's not really an accurate understanding of that genre of romance novels. And to be clear, there's quite a lot of women who find that sort of romance novel off putting. The women who do like dark romances don't want to be the heroine in those novels. It's like an adventure novel: flying on a dragon sounds awesome on paper, but it would probably be terrifying and extremely uncomfortable IRL. And even the dark romances end with picket fences, really. A wedding, house, babies, security, and happ…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/23 07:05 AM
1

We've all seen the creepy age gap relationship: it definitely exists. I think we've eroded so many sexual boundaries that it's harder to tell young women how to avoid exploitative relationships, and the age gap issue is, for whatever reason, one of the easier boundaries to still set. If a young woman is able to maintain other functional boundaries about sex to avoid being pressured or exploited, I think age gap is much less of a concern. If she's got shit boundaries, it's more of a red flag (tho…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/23 06:41 AM
2

It's not visual, that's the thing. I might imagine a scenario, or the feeling of a partner doing certain things. But I don't find picturing what the man looks like helpful.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/23 04:22 AM
1

Physical attraction for me is definitely more about avoiding the ick than actually finding a man super hot. But wait, are you implying that the hotness of a woman impacts how good sex feels for men?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/02/23 04:07 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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