VincentValensky Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
13	I have a lack of empathy for any man willing to marry at this point. Your argument boils down to "Marriage sucks therefore I should give up on meaningful relationships" which if you think about for more than 5 seconds doesn't really make sense. There's nothing wrong with any of your choices in a vacuum, but you are arriving at your conclusion from a heap of false assumptions, like being unable to find a partner that is actually a great person and may not care about getting married.	/r/Divorce_Men	31/05/26 04:12 PM
12	How often do they come back? You're asking the wrong questions man. Considering how your past year has went, she's not going to give you closure, let alone consider coming back. You need to be the villain because that makes it psychologically easier for her to move on than holding a complex and nuanced position all the while standing her ground on the separation. You won't get apologies, explanations or justice from her. Work on getting those things from yourself now and letting go the version of her you used to know.	/r/Divorce_Men	28/04/26 02:08 PM
4	Finally hitting me that this will be the last Christmas I’ll get to spend with my kids in our home. Anyone else experienced this? Man if you truly want the best for your kids, that involves having a dad that is well (physically and mentally) and is able to show up in their lives as a positive example. Money can't replace that. Don't give them everything because you will be taking away what really matters - a happy dad to share a life with.	/r/Divorce_Men	14/12/25 02:02 PM
5	Ranting/emotional This is not healthy, even in a happy relationship. Your happiness needs to come from yourself, not others. I would take this as an opportunity to reposition yourself as the center of your own world and find the strength and purpose from within, rather than outside sources. This does not mean to avoid committments or not love unconditionally. But sacrificing yourself leads to unhealthy relationship dynamics, and generally being taken for granted. Others will respect you only if you respect yourse…	/r/Divorce_Men	08/12/25 11:15 AM
3	Ranting/emotional Love and empathy are compatible with boundaries. You can love someone very much and still hold a position that does not sacrifice your own needs, self-respect and right to happiness.	/r/Divorce_Men	08/12/25 11:06 AM
1	How do I feel "ok" about divorce? That's okay. You don't need to stop loving her to move on. Cherish what you had and honor your feelings without suppressing them. We can love many people in many ways. Our relationships are defined by the choices we make.	/r/Divorce_Men	06/12/25 09:28 PM
2	How do I feel "ok" about divorce? Which bit is actually holding you back? You are young, with plenty of time to build a life for yourself, even if you take 5 years alone in the desert you'd still be in a good place. And if it's the love for her, you can love someone and still accept that you are not meant to be together.	/r/Divorce_Men	06/12/25 08:51 PM
6	Sexless Marriage and Feeling Manipulated: Is Divorce Inevitable? What does she say when you bring up the topic? Generally the first 2 years can be pretty rough and this is not uncommon even in healthy relationships. It's worth considering that sex and intimacy are two very different things - aside from the lack of sex, is there intimacy between you, do you cuddle and kiss, spend time together? Also, have you asked her where her head is at, she may be experiencing post partum depression etc. Does she feel emotional connection on your side, are you helping in a…	/r/Divorce_Men	06/12/25 08:04 PM
1	Ladies be tripping Some people's opinions truly doesn't matter. You seem to be living rent free in their heads. IMO consider it a badge of honor that both your wife and her friends have nothing better to attack you with than "lol you must be gay". What is this, kindergarden?	/r/Divorce_Men	06/12/25 11:59 AM
6	Ladies be tripping If someone has nothing better to do than harassing others for being gay (???) just block and move on. Or avoid contact IRL if you can. If you can't, just consider how empty of a life they have and treat as barking dogs.	/r/Divorce_Men	06/12/25 11:46 AM
3	Difficulty finding an end goal with dating I'd like to chime in on this one with a different perspective. Please note that I'm a non-monogamous person, however this is not advice advocating for non-monogamy. I strongly believe that deconstructing society's expectations of a relationship can be incredibly helpful for everyone, including strictly monogamous folk. Some of my personal takeaways are: -a relationship can be perfectly happy, valid, and fulfilling even if you don't live together -a relationship can be good and positive even if i…	/r/Divorce_Men	27/11/25 10:00 AM
2	Suicidal ideation since divorce Damn. For my 2 cents, mushrooms/LSD/DMT is the nuclear option if you want a factory reset of your brain	/r/Divorce_Men	26/11/25 07:39 AM
2	Is getting dates/hooking up supposed to be easy? If you have close friends that have seen these interactions, don't hesitate to ask them what you're doing wrong. You're not giving us much info here, and your closest people will probably know much better where the problem is coming from.	/r/seduction	12/09/19 08:40 PM
1	Open relationships Yep, absolutely.	/r/seduction	20/05/19 07:39 PM
1	Open relationships Open relationship doesn't mean that you can do whatever the fuck you want :D Every couple usually defines their own boundaries, but for the majority, is letting the other person know what you want to do before you do it and giving them the option to veto if they're not comfortable with it (maybe they really dislike the person, maybe other reasons.) Additionally all third parties are not equal. Open is not quite the same as polyamory. There may be comfortable with random hook-ups here and there i…	/r/seduction	20/05/19 07:36 PM