~ archived since 2018 ~
~ archived since 2018 ~
| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
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| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
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| 1 | Any insight?You are married to a serial cheater who has zero respect for you brother. I'm sorry man. I'm on your side and want things to go well for you. You are showing up as kind of a doormat and your soon-to-be ex is walking all over you and flaunting it in your face. Until that changes, a big part of the pain you will continue to feel is coming from a deep-down lack of self-respect in not kicking her cheating ass to the curb years ago. I did not go through the infidelity thing but I did go through in-ho… | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/03/26 08:30 PM |
| 2 | Even in death it's hardCongratulations on your New Life my brother. Take your kids furniture shopping for their new bedrooms. Let them pick it out. Enjoy the time with your boys, it goes by fast. | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/12/25 02:10 AM |
| 5 | Something is wrong here.She has already filed for divorce, I’m waiting on the paperwork and to speak with an attorney - DO THIS ASAP. DON'T DELAY THE PROCESS. Friday we discuss who will have our son and when, that goes well, then onto the money. DON'T DISCUSS MONEY, LEAVE THAT TO THE LAWYERS, IT'S JUST A FORMULA. I follow into the garage where I minor argument ensues and I just apologize and say I was being inconsiderate. DON'T FOLLOW HER ANYWHERE. DON'T ARGUE ABOUT ANYTHING, BUT DON'T CONCEDE ANYTHING. STFU. After spe… | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/12/25 02:04 AM |
| 1 | Wife cheated during separationPriority 1: finalize the divorce deal and get that cheddar. Priority 2: finalize the divorce deal and get that cheddar. Priority 3: finalize the divorce deal and get that cheddar. Priority 4: at the moment, there is no Priority 4. | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/08/25 05:44 AM |
| -1 | Husband wants a divorce, I'm 32 F with three kids, am I dateable after this?Sorry you are going through this. I see your husband walked out only 1 month ago and you are already having concerns about future dating options and another marriage? My advice is to stop thinking about future dating and relationships, and please focus on your 3 very very young children. Eventually a casual FWB type of thing will be your best bet for quite awhile, and there is nothing wrong with that. | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/08/25 05:40 AM |
| 1 | 3 Friends, 3 divorces, 3 outcomes...NOT ME."Everything is met with an eye roll or sarcastic comment." Game Over. | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/08/25 05:43 AM |
| 1 | Successful long-term relationships? Incorporating lessons from our divorce"I think there’s a simple secret to doing this, though. It goes like this: First, The man states what he wants to do. Second, He then asks his female partner what she’d like to do." You should know what your woman likes and dislikes. It should be easy to just make the call yourself. There is no need to ask what she'd like to do. If she doesn't like your plan, she will let you know. That should be a relatively rare occurrence. | /r/Divorce_Men | 24/06/25 06:11 AM |
| 1 | Almost Got Killed Last NightYo brother, first off I am on your side my man. Bummer about the accident but you're alive and that's #1. As for the domestic stuff, I feel you, just make sure you are not playing the Victim Card in a daily game of Woe Is Me. If you are, knock it off, like right now. Stop it. Sack up and get on with life, it's beautiful out here in the wild! You're going to make it if you get your head straight and your attitude positive. You are the captain of your ship my friend, take the helm and chart a cour… | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/04/25 11:13 PM |
| 3 | If I get a temp 50/50 custody order and visitation signed off on a judge can I leave the house?I did not move and get into my new place until I had a signed 50/50 custody agreement and a signed property split agreement. Took about 7 months to get that done. Don't move out without getting this done. | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/11/24 05:40 AM |
| 2 | Last Night In The HouseLook my family moved from the home I grew up in when I was in 6th grade, and the new home was even better. That second home is the one I miss, looking back. Let go. Make your new home even better my friend. | /r/Divorce_Men | 04/06/24 12:28 AM |
| 3 | Wife says she wants a divorce, and full custody of our 5 month oldIf she wants a divorce, give her a divorce. No therapy, no talking about your "feelings". Honest to God man, the best response is a mindset of "No problem, I will find someone else who appreciates me and thinks I'm great! In addition, Hire a lawyer now. Now Now Now. Hire a lawyer. Lawyer. Now. | /r/Divorce_Men | 31/05/24 08:18 PM |
| 20 | Just seperatedThe World is about to become your oyster my friend. Stay Positive. You are jettisoning a 46 yr old pre-menopausal cheater and liar. You will be far better off without her. Double down on your workouts, career focus and connection with kids. Develop your hobbies. You are The Captain my man, run your ship strong. You will also find that if you get on top of your game, at 41 you will have a wide variety of options with women. "Geez, feel just lost, scared and alone." You are none of these things. Y… | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/05/24 03:25 PM |
| 3 | Getting Bought OutMy kids were 9 and 6 when 'we' moved out - me 100% of the time out, them 50% out. We went to go look at houses together - made them part of the process. We moved into a neighborhood 1 mile away from the marital home where they already had some friends. They picked out their new bedroom furniture. Make the new place all of yours my friend. | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/05/24 04:41 AM |
| 1 | What would you doYou have a massive fundamental problem my brother in that your wife out-earns you (sounds like by alot) and you took on kind of a Mr. Mom role. Not good. She does not respect you. Her money is hers and she will do what the eff she wants with it pal. Great attitude! Look i love women and its awesome they are out there making coin, I'm no misogynist, I'm just sayin a situation where wifey out-earns her husband almost always leads to diminished/lack of respect and some level of emasculation. It is … | /r/Divorce_Men | 24/05/24 05:46 AM |
| 5 | Too fast or am I good?Get the lawyer and try to get a deal in place while she is still in limerance with her wonderful affair partner. You may be set up to get a better outcome while she is starry-eyed in love/lust. Get the lawyer, hire the lawyer, get it going, take charge and push the divorce, that's my opinion. Expedite shyt-canning her cheating ass. You will look back with pride that you took the game to her quickly. Regarding dating, my story is I inked a partial deal for custody and asset split, moved out and w… | /r/Divorce_Men | 24/05/24 05:39 AM |
| 9 | Missing my childrenLet me prop you up my brother and tell you it is early in the game and you will get your mind right before long and all will be well. You are a man my friend, not a nanny, and as such you are made to set an example for your kids as to how a man conducts himself and pursues excellence in his career, health, hobbies, and adventures. Get your grind on when you don't have the kids to free up more quality time when you have them. But also let them see you pursuing excellence as well. It's not all fun… | /r/Divorce_Men | 24/05/24 05:28 AM |
| 2 | Ex threatening to move if I purchase a home in her area.Your path forward, my brother, should be greatly influenced by your past mistakes. First off I am on your side and want you to quickly reverse the erosion of your relationship with your daughter. In great part you may be in this current predicament due what seems like your desire to be a nice guy. Not trying to pound you but... Ex living in a property you own? Nice guy. How did that work out for you? Ex wants to move your daughter 1,000 miles away? No problem! How is that working for you? Ex is … | /r/Divorce_Men | 11/04/24 07:17 AM |
| 0 | Dropped off son yesterday after Spring break. Frustrated."I had to move cause of work." Really? | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/04/24 03:35 AM |
| 3 | Online datingOLD is to be used sparingly, only during times when you have been too busy on your grind to be out there mingling IRL, and for hook ups only. My nickname for Match.com is FirstDateBJ.com. Honestly I would put the first date hookup ratio as 1 out of 5, which is incredible given the number of duds you will get. Stay off the computer and get out there in the world my brothers. | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/04/24 03:33 AM |
| 3 | Just Like That, 26 Years.You have been set free my friend. I am giving you a virtual high-five and toasting you. You endured an abusive relationship for far too long. But now you are free of her! You likely have some level of PTSD and should seek out excellent counseling. Embrace being a cautionary tale. Continue to share your story with younger men. Gentlemen, do not tolerate disrespect, abuse, or madness. Nip it in the bud. Tell your wife you are not happy in the relationship and if things don't change you don't see h… | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/03/24 07:30 AM |
| 4 | Wife is moving out tomorrow."We already worked out a schedule, so that’s nice but I keep going back to what I do when I when they’re not with me." Gym. Hobbies. Travel. Career. Friends and family. Home projects. These will fill 100% of your time when you don't have the kids, trust me. Eventually you will add dating to the schedule. You're a young dude, your best years are ahead of you. Get going my brother. | /r/Divorce_Men | 14/03/24 05:30 AM |
| 3 | A little updateNo deep, heartfelt conversations. No apologies. Logistics only my friend, that is the extent of your conversations. Otherwise STFU. Shytcan that podcaster who told you to "talk it out". Bad, bad advice. You learned the hard way brother. Every time she presses you to move out, do like Nancy Reagan said, Just Say "No". You don't need to say why or "talk it out" man. Just say the word "no" and nothing else. There is no law that says you have to talk to her or give her any details or any of your tho… | /r/Divorce_Men | 14/03/24 12:21 AM |
| 17 | I’m back after 6 monthsCongratulations man! Make sure you screen shot or otherwise capture and save the photo(s) with the wedding dress and ring and stuff. Like stop reading this and do that right now. Your wife didn't ask for divorce out of nowhere, trust me. It only seemed that way to you. She was way ahead of you my friend. Zero chance she has done any work on herself to prep for a successful 2nd marriage, which have a higher likelihood of divorce than 1st marriages. But WHO CARES what happens with that - your only… | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/03/24 10:33 PM |
| 13 | Thoughts now that I'm divorced and almost 'done' with her.Couple of things my brother - first congratulations on moving on from what appears to be a very damaged woman. When you have physical separation it is going to feel incredible. Let me say that in my opinion you need to care very much about your STBX's AP to the extent that your kids can never be permitted to be in his presence as he is a violent animal who beats women. This is a straight up priority to get a restraining order or some other order where your X can never have him around the kids. D… | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/03/24 02:52 AM |
| 6 | Send it?This short story is a good example of why you never move out of the house. Brother you provide no details as to how it happens to be that you are living separate from your kids and have no current control of the situation, but for illustrative purposes and for the benefit of the forum, it doesn't really matter. Gentlemen, do not move out or allow the wife to leave with the kids, period full stop, without a signed sealed delivered custody agreement. I personally endured 8 months of in-house separ… | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/03/24 01:05 AM |
| 3 | I'm losing control of myself and she continues to lie to meBegging, pleading, offering to do anything, these things never work. They make you look weak and that is not attractive. These things actually further repulse a woman who already does not respect you and wants out. The best move when you discover cheating or are told by the wife that she wants out is to take control of the divorce process right away. You do not want a woman who does not respect you or want to be with you. She can eat your dust as you move on with your life. Watch her reaction wh… | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/03/24 12:03 AM |
| 10 | The removed this post within 3 minutes lol: "The chores lie"Relationships with a Scorekeeper are extremely difficult and are usually unhappy and often end in divorce. You are always going to be behind on the scoreboard, and most of the time it's not even close. You are getting blown out. You are getting alley-oop dunked on. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/24 11:57 PM |
| 4 | It's over... tfgYou will rebuild financially my brother. You will rebuild and it will be ALL YOURS. You are now off on a new adventure with endless options and a wide open highway. Enjoy the ride. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/24 08:16 AM |
| -2 | Is movie style enmeshed romance a masculine ideal?"I want someone with whome our love is so strong that we could be sick and destitute living under a bridge and we would still be grateful to have eachother. Is this kind of notion a man's dream?" No it is not the dream of a man who understands women and what they want and need. It is not the dream of a captain in charge of his vessel. Sickness and destitution do not cross his mind, nor does clinging to a woman for comfort. | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/03/24 06:20 AM |
| 3 | Is movie style enmeshed romance a masculine ideal?The reason she has lost interest in you and does not reciprocate your love bombing is because you are pouring your heart and soul into her every day instead of your purpose. What you are doing is a turn off over the long haul. | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/03/24 06:17 AM |
| 17 | She was having an affairLike Sgt. Barnes said in Platoon, Take the Pain. You can hack it brother. No emotional conversations with her. If you need to talk, talk with your best friends and family, It's Inner Circle time, and she is no longer in it. There is nothing to talk with her about other than logistics or her getting her shyt out of the house and an interim custody arrangement. Be a man of action not words. Get a lawyer, file the papers, and press forward with divorce. You do not need to nor should you do a post-m… | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/02/24 07:26 AM |
| 13 | Do they believe their own lies?They're not lying, they're speaking their version of their reality. Women are governed by their emotions, and they don't want to feel bad about themselves, so their storyline is designed to avoid that. Most women avoid accountability and apologies like the plague. Arguing with her and dissecting the relationship is not a good idea. Don't do any more of that. There is no need or value in apologizing to her for anything. Don't apologize. What you should say in response to her desire for the split … | /r/Divorce_Men | 22/02/24 11:43 PM |
| 2 | Cash for custodyYou have your answer here my friend. Maximum amount of custody is Priority 1. If Canada is anything like the US, both custody and money split and ongoing payments etc are very formulaic. Lawyers tend to get women riled up and run up the legal bill, when in reality they know it's all pretty much pre-ordained unless there are very significant extenuating circumstances. | /r/Divorce_Men | 22/02/24 07:10 AM |
| 6 | How do you survive financially even with a prenup?Slow down brother, you're spinning. Close your eyes and take 10 slow deep breaths, slowly in and out dude. I'm not kidding, do it. First things first - pay a lawyer. Hire a good one. Pay them. Don't be penny -wise and pound-foolish. Pay a lawyer and game-plan a strategy for the best possible outcome. She needs to set up the move out. No piecemeal BS. One day, moving company, get it done, out, OUT. As for what to do with the 401K money, see paragraph 1. Slow down. That's a decision for later, | /r/Divorce_Men | 22/02/24 05:18 AM |
| 5 | "you deserve so much better"Get her the eff out of your house right away. She can crash with a friend or family member or go back to the other guy. Surely she can crash somewhere else until the 401k money lands. What is the hold up? It shouldn't take long. Get her out of the house man. Also you need full custody. You can't have your kids in the company of a violent abusive man. You have to get with your lawyer on this right away. You need an order that your kids can't be in this guys house or anywhere near him. A man prote… | /r/Divorce_Men | 22/02/24 04:57 AM |
| 16 | Wife confessed to affairMy 2 cents: STFU. Zero discussions w/wifey about the marriage. "I need time to think about things". Then STFU. Lawyer lawyer lawyer lawyer lawyer lawyer lawyer............................................. Also, STFU and meet with a Lawyer. This is all you have to do at the moment. Don't eff around. | /r/Divorce_Men | 22/02/24 04:44 AM |
| 4 | Refusing to play in order to winGrey rock is still the way my brother. Let your excellent lawyer engage and swing the sword. | /r/Divorce_Men | 22/02/24 04:35 AM |
| 3 | I’m sick of myselfYou can't control her behavior including her new relationship but you can stick to the custody agreement to block long vacations or other events on your time. Eventually however it is best to have some flexibility and work together as you may want to modify the schedule from time to time. My ex and I stay on schedule 2/3 of the year and about 1/3 is modified due to this or that. I always recommend having a background check run on a new guy who is around the kids. Just do it. If you believe your … | /r/Divorce_Men | 18/02/24 06:10 AM |
| 11 | Why isn’t this more well known?What I have witnessed my friends over many decades now is the pussification of men. It's incredible to behold. Some blame feminism. Some blame Hollywood. I blame men. An actual man takes 100% responsibility for his position in life. I couldn't watch the #1 hit show Friends. The guys? A clown, a dope and a whiny pussy. A feeling of disgust washed over me when the whiny pussy character entered a scene. As if a guy with those characteristics would get a girl who looked like Jennifer Aniston. Yeah r… | /r/Divorce_Men | 18/02/24 12:18 AM |
| 12 | 'We need to decide if we're going to work on things...'Congratulations on your newly peaceful home. Now you can further bond with your children without distractions. Do so. Also, while I understand it may be early days in your mind and/or you may harbor some uncertainties, I will at least suggest that you consider filing for divorce. Take control of the situation with authority my friend.. | /r/Divorce_Men | 14/02/24 06:46 AM |
| 3 | Why am I numb and paralyzed with inaction? How do I gain momentum to make a change?First off let me be very clear that I am on your side my dude and I want to see you move along and build a life worthy of a king or at least a member of the king's court. You must change your mindset. You describe yourself as "numb, paralyzed, scared" Your wife can smell that on you. All women can smell that stuff. Knock it off you're better than that. Men aren't numb, they're engaged and invigorated. Men are never paralyzed, they take decisive action. And of course men aren't scared. C'mon man … | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/02/24 06:44 AM |
| 14 | How do I move on?Ok here's a few things my friend: Your wife has less than zero respect for you. Any statement or attempt by you to work things out will cause her to lose even more respect for you. Women who do not respect their husbands and cheat on their husbands and end the marriage naturally think "why would he want to be with me when I clearly don't want him and am disrespecting him brutally to his effing face?! WTF is wrong with this guy? He's not worthy of respect." Don't move out until all legalities inc… | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/02/24 06:13 AM |
| 4 | How dishonest many of them areMany many women are scorekeepers when it comes to domestic work, and be assured that you Mr. Man are way behind on the scoreboard. I always approached every day as if i were on my own and had 100% responsibility to run the house. My ex did do alot, but my mentality was that it was my responsibility, so everything she did was a bonus. Truthfully she handled more details and line items than I did, but I worked several hours longer than she did every day on average. Nevertheless she believed she di… | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/02/24 05:53 AM |
| 14 | Why aren’t we even given a chance?There is alot to discuss here my friend. First off I wish you well and a quick journey to regaining yourself as a man and as a free-standing non-dependent individual. You can get there. Now let me dissect a few things. The first part of your post reads like you are looking to find a place to lay blame - aka your wife did not disclose to you her unhappiness and also its COVID's fault. May I suggest you don't do that. First of all, always pay close attention to a woman's actions, not her words. Th… | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/02/24 12:53 AM |
| 1 | [New Jersey] What are chances that 6yr old son mother will be successful in custody revision in her favor following her move to new husband house in town 55 miles awayWisconsin | /r/Divorce_Men | 31/01/24 07:04 AM |
| 2 | I saw my x wife at Walmart and I feltYou saw your ex at Walmart? Hopefully she was working her new job there at the cash register? That would have been epic. Being indifferent is the ultimate strength. Good on ya. | /r/Divorce_Men | 31/01/24 07:03 AM |
| 7 | Broken and confused"it's bullshit that our kids will be raised by someone who became so toxic and manipulative." Get 50% custody my friend. That way you are removing the kids from her influence for half of the rest of their childhood. Then you can have many teaching moments completely under your control. Glass is half full, not empty my brother. Go get that custody and make your time with the kids count. | /r/Divorce_Men | 31/01/24 06:54 AM |
| 1 | [New Jersey] What are chances that 6yr old son mother will be successful in custody revision in her favor following her move to new husband house in town 55 miles awayNo attorney is going to guarantee you anything. They will be vague in this instance because it could go either way, sorry. What I can tell you is that judges always do what's best for the kids which in most cases is 50/50 custody as well as keeping them in the same school and area if everything is going good. Status quo if you will. I do know a guy whose wife convinced him to move halfway across the country near her hometown with their kid, and she had already been involved with an old boyfriend… | /r/Divorce_Men | 29/01/24 06:03 AM |
| 9 | Uno Reverse CardTalking shyt on social media (or anywhere publicly) about the relationship and divorce is low budget. Don't get involved with it. People know there are 2 sides to the story. They pretty much also frown on BS being spewed on social media because like I said, it's low budget. Move on. Ignore her. Nothing is more powerful than ignoring someone. You send a message that what they think and say is so unimportant that you don't even hear it. I still have plenty of time in the same space with my ex beca… | /r/Divorce_Men | 29/01/24 05:45 AM |
| 2 | Stopped our divorce, 3 months later my wife changed again.Can I ask you a question? Why are you so afraid of everything? Have you always been a fearful person? Do you think being afraid of everything makes you appear strong or weak? Do you have sons and if so do you want to set an example of being a strong man who can handle anything or do you want to teach them how to be afraid of everything? I say this with love my friend, and tough love may be what you need. Goddamnit man stop being so afraid of everything. Sack up. You are the author of your own st… | /r/Divorce_Men | 27/01/24 09:48 PM |
| 16 | Feeling pretty lowI have a question. Why have you given one person the power to ruin your life? I mean, she wasn't born with that power. She didn't have it before you met her. At some point in time you seem to have given her this immense power over your entire existence. I'm not trying to pile on you dude. I want to help you. I think some tough love might be in order. But you have to be the main character in your own rescue from your current spinning emotional storyline. Get ahold of yourself brother! You're real… | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/01/24 07:42 AM |
| 2 | Got one that can’t find much detail about. 9/5 Ackerman parenting schedule.Sounds complicated. I have a 4/3 split with me getting the 3. Same days every week, the kids know exactly where they'll be week after week all year. We split the weekends in half so we each have part of weekend w/kids and part w/out. We stay on schedule for probably 75% of the year, with the other 25% being modified based on trips and other stuff. In reality, due to sports and friends group activities and stuff, I probably average seeing the kids 5 days a week. Any schedule that involves Parent … | /r/Divorce_Men | 18/01/24 04:51 PM |
| 2 | I over heard my wife talking about going out of town the following week and heard her talking about another guy.You need to saddle up my friend and get busy fixing your primary problem - you have no $$ and you are living in your wife's parents' basement. It almost doesn't matter how that came to be. Your wife does not respect you and it shows by her behavior. You might not be able to save your marriage at this point, but you can save yourself. Reducing the amount of time you spend with your kids because you have to grind at 2 jobs to get out of the hole you are in? So be it. Get it done. Don't be distract… | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/01/24 07:03 PM |
| 8 | DisgustedSorry about the house. Fight endlessly for time with the kids and make every minute of it count. Do not relent. Build a kick-ass life one block at a time and leave your POS ex, her POS boyfriend, and your POS former friends in your rearview mirror. Let them eat your dust my friend. POS birds of a feather flock together. Let me tell you something - in my friend group there was a cheating scandal - husband in Couple #1 cheated with wife in Couple #2 - get it? Our entire group of friends sided with… | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/01/24 07:16 AM |
| 5 | I can't stand my stbxwResentment and hate are poisons in your mind and body. Cleanse yourself my brother. Indifference is where you want to be. Your current state of mind and emotion gives her power over you - is that what you want? Your dog exchange is a business transaction. She's a clerk at a store. Step into your new life and leave her behind. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/01/24 10:44 PM |
| 5 | My ex wife is delusional and it drives me nutsWhy are you allowing a so-called delusional person to drive you insane? Who cares if she takes any responsibility for the divorce? Who cares what she says or does? You sound like you are still attached. You need to detach my friend. Move along. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/01/24 10:38 PM |
| 5 | Anniversary - Acknowledge or NoDon't do it. I don't even do it for any occasion. And my divorce was not very contentious. | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/01/24 10:33 PM |
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