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What_is_real_anymore Archive

View 10 posts and 297 comments by What_is_real_anymore on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Lack of self control, discipline, and consistency. ​ I know exactly what I have to do. I do not do it. My desire to be at the end state and my desire to put in the work get overshadowed by cravings, laziness, and rationalizing. ​ I don't like feeling bad about myself, and at the same time, I'm not willing to take actions to commit to myself. ​ The last time I took any real action was when I discovered the pill three years ago and my mental models fell down around my ears. I rocked it then for a …
/r/MarriedRedPill04/03/19 05:07 PM
1

Left MRP - had a fulfilling life, career was great, kids listening, getting plenty of sex, all in all, life was happening the way I wanted to. ​ Fast forward to 15+ months later. I've gotten lazy, I feel my body is weak, my mind is weak, and my libido is low. My general desire and satisfaction is not where I want it. I'm back here to work and figure out how to get there. Weight: 210 on a 5"7' frame. BF is easliy 45% or higher. My trends over the last year have only gone up, not down. I attribute…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/02/19 03:15 PM
4

said the feminine social order policing tradcon. ​ Do what you do because you want to do it. If you like raising boys and mentoring children. Do it. Own it. Say it. But don't LARP at some some covert contract fantasy that you can be the masculine influence in their lives and they're going to think, "OMG, my uncle is the coolest, my dad's a fucking loser".
/r/MarriedRedPill29/01/19 03:22 PM
3

Be present. Be masculine. Be the man you feel good about being. Your kids may or may not follow you, but one thing's for sure, they're not going to follow an incongruent mess telling them to do one thing while he does the other. ​ And at the end of the day, take pride in your kingdom, including your offspring. Enjoy your life. Because it's yours. Your kids will have plenty of time to fuck up and come back. Don't pay too much attention to mothering them. Or even being too hardcore with them.
/r/MarriedRedPill29/01/19 03:17 PM
1

"A man who would be a bad long term bet for women’s Hypergamy because he lacks self-control. For this straw man character his little head does the thinking for the big head making him unreliable as a prospect for parental investment. " It's not a wrong assumption. Alpha fux and beta bux and all that... Frankly, we've evolved as a race to get to that point. And there's data analysis that supports it. ​ Take for example, the female to male breeding ratio for three populations: Western Europe, Yoru…
/r/MarriedRedPill29/01/19 03:13 PM
2

Appreciate the comment. Protecting and raising my child means arming her with information and skill to face the world.
/r/RedPillParenting11/10/18 02:51 PM
1

Through the neighborhood - 300'. Not far from home at all. The dastardly scenario playing in my mind is the guy that drives up and snatches her while nobody's looking in the span of the 10 minutes she's out of my site. ​ I know. Paranoia.
/r/RedPillParenting11/10/18 02:49 PM
3

Exactly my thinking, but the nagging voice in the back of my brain says I know a whole lot more now than we did decades ago when our parents let us run free. And knowledge is a double edged sword. I definitely don't 'want to reinforce victimhood - but there's prudence somewhere in there with the knowledge that she does belong to the weaker sex, and there is a place for protecting my domain. Thanks for the comment and link.
/r/RedPillParenting11/10/18 02:47 PM
3

MRP is about saving men, not marriages. Isn’t there a fine line between mate guarding and boundary enforcement? What’s that look like?
/r/MarriedRedPill19/11/17 11:13 AM
2

This reminded of the idea that "There is no such thing as true altruism". We do "good" for others because it makes us feel good. That in and of itself is not a "bad" thing. It's amoral and biological. What IS bad is not living authentically. The laws of power are written with perhaps a "negative" connotation, but I think one can be more assertive with some of the rules. To that extent, those narcissistic personality traits can viewed from different lenses. And that doesn't make someone NPD. For …
/r/MarriedRedPill18/11/17 04:38 PM
1

Very cool. I'll look for it. No. His name wasn't Joel. But when I think about masculine characteristics of men who have influenced me, he comes to mind in my "council of elders". At some point though, I need to get out of padawan mode and get to being a man - it's tough to strike that balance between humility and always feeling like you're a student and confidence. I tend to lean too far to the student.
/r/RPChristians18/11/17 03:52 PM
1

Ok. Good call. I'll do that in r/fitness.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/11/17 03:48 PM
1

That's fantastic. I once had a mentor who, like you, lived to serve Christ every day. Except he didn't beat you over the head with it. He exuded a charisma that you were just attracted to. He knew what he was about, had no fear, and he had joy on his face. Died far too young, may his memory be eternal. I'm trying to craft my mission statement - what makes me tick, get to the root of it all, so I'm curious as to how you advise men and your disciples to find theirs.
/r/RPChristians17/11/17 11:09 PM
1

Maybe I missed it in previous discussion? What's your mission? How do you exude it and live it?
/r/RPChristians17/11/17 02:13 PM
2

That's the absolute gospel right there. Self-improvement may be masturbation, but self-investment is fucking the prom queen and all her friends.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/17 05:16 PM
1

Odd phrasing for a Navy guy eh? If you don't have the stomach to lose a grand or two, you're not ready to gamble on volatile stocks. Interestingly though, I've been seeing more and more "shock and awe" type of ads pointing towards financially securing hard assets - property, silver, gold, fuel. Etc. Not that those things are ever a bad thing to own, but rather the political will to redistribute wealth is growing larger and larger. Not saying that it isn't a scare tactic, but it's definitely givi…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/17 03:06 PM
1

You still can
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/17 02:09 PM
4

PHYSICAL Continuing to lift and progress with 5x5. Lifts are starting to feel heavy. I'll lay out my stats: H: 5'6" W: 196 Lbs BF: ~35-40% B: 125 Lbs - heavy - resting three minutes between sets. OHP: 105 Lbs - stalled. Missing two reps in the middle of the 5x5 sets. going something like 5x4x5x4x5 over the last two sessions. I think I might just need to rest a bit more. Squat: 175 Lbs. Not getting sore, just breathing heavy. I feel like I'm using my back a bit at the bottom of the squat - almost…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/17 01:58 PM
5

I read this, and instantly my monkey brain kicked in with: My marriage sucks. I should do dancing monkey and make my wife feel. My marriage will be better. But I checked myself. It's not about making her feel so that she'll want to be with you like a huge covert contract is it? Certainly being aware of her motivations is important for the autist and unnaturals. There's something deeper that belies all this I think. Isn't it the mission? Isn't being fully present in yourself, with your mission, a…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/11/17 01:06 PM
1

A little farther along. I've had the opportunity to try a bunch of different things so I've been able to list those things I do that really resonate with me. So now I"m trying to truly articulate why those things resonated with me, and to craft a mission.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/11/17 06:22 PM
1

Would the brain turning off be so easy.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/11/17 09:00 PM
1

Years of never thinking I'm good enough, and years of low conscientiousness. I have a very hard time staying on target and getting shit done. Despite all the indications to the contrary. And I'm largely reactive. My frame is absolutely built on her image of me. And no matter how much I try to crush it, all it takes is a freeze to gut me.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/11/17 08:54 PM
1

It's the thread I've been on for the last few OYS. Finding some self-worth and value. Feeling it really. Yeah. I'm feeling that donkey right now. I'm probably relying on OYS too much as an emotional tampon though. I might need to seek help.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/11/17 08:31 PM
1

If I'm relying on her to make me happy, I'll commit the same mistakes over and over again. Whether I see myself with her when I'm 70? I don't know. I don't even know what I see myself as when I'm 70. Hence, get my shit together first before expecting results. The good and bad memories are just memories. What's worth gold to me is learning and growing. My happiest are from our early marriage when we were popping out babies and it felt like we were conquering the world. But I had a mission then an…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/11/17 08:21 PM
1

Generational sin. The sad fact is, no matter how hard we try, we've already left our imprints on our children. It's taken me a long time to realize my parents weren't actively trying to fuck me up, they were doing the best they could with what they had.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/11/17 08:17 PM
1

Yeah, kids are smart. My own are younger and they're aware of the tension, discomfort, and divergent value systems between wife and I. My middle one said, Dad, what happens if you and Mom get a divorce? At the time, I pussed out and said, "I will do whatever is in my power to make sure that doesn't happen, because I love you kids." I was ego protecting the whole way. But if I was honest with myself, and therefore them, I'd say, I'll fight hard to make sure I get to raise you, because I love you,…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/11/17 06:27 PM
1

My bad. Actually didn't know what you did. Now I do. Question was for Scurve. But I do appreciate your perspective. Do your kids see this coming down the pike?
/r/MarriedRedPill08/11/17 05:53 PM
1

The other aspect of trust has been the removal of covert contracts. Now that they're gone, it's easy to see how they were a complete desire killer. Sometimes the answer is right in front of your face and you just can't see it. Man do I struggle with this. I always feel judged, but I'm also always judging her. Not sure how to get out of that pattern, but this clicked for me. Thank you.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/11/17 04:38 PM
2

Simple. Not easy. Get after it my man.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/11/17 04:34 PM
1

Agreed. It's why I'm loathe to automatically throw her to the curb. It kills me that it takes my wife's shit tests to show me my low value behaviors. And she will continue to behave poorly as I behave poorly.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/11/17 04:05 PM
1

I'm working on my mission too. Where's your head at right now? What're you thinking?
/r/MarriedRedPill08/11/17 04:00 PM
2

Good Dancing Monkey. Some weeks that's all you can do. I get that. What did you learn about yourself? What perspective change did you uncover?
/r/MarriedRedPill08/11/17 03:58 PM
1

I'm in that phase too. I feel like it's completely unfair for me to expect her to respond quickly, especially when I haven't given her the opportunity to change explicitly. I don't know how I'm going to do that - it's like putting my wife on a PIP. Divorce rape would suck, the trauma to my kids will suck. The trauma to our own pysche would suck. But we'll all survive. What I'm struggling with is how to lead her to add value. And eventually get to DL 11 - the "add value or else" speech. Or I coul…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/11/17 03:43 PM
1

It's part of that. I have a cloud of a vision forming, but I can't fully articulate it yet. What I'm playing with is looking at my wife and saying, "This [is who I am, my values, and my mission]. Are you on board or not?" It's a mental exercise, but I think it helps me frame what I'm looking at. I look at the things that bring me joy and meaning. Being a Den Leader for Cub Scouts - because I value raising young men to be men. Teaching Church School - because I value molding and shaping the next …
/r/MarriedRedPill08/11/17 03:28 PM
1

Physical/Health Set up a secret group on facebook with a handful of men to keep ourselves accountable. Pretty cool to see other men responding and challenging each other too - outside of this ring. Haven't missed a workout, adding a little more to the workouts now, staying consistent with warmups which was my goal from last week. Even adding in the WOD challenge from the group. For example, in addition to the normal workout - do 100 pushups throughout the day. Or 100 lunges. Or run two miles. Fe…
/r/MarriedRedPill08/11/17 11:38 AM
2

How do you save posts that you want to come back to over and over again?
/r/MarriedRedPill03/11/17 04:25 PM
1

I appreciate what you're saying. I WANT to lead. I WANT to act. I WANT to run on the playing field and make a play. But if dancing monkey is playing at being an authentic version of myself, then what is ACTUALLY being authentic? I'm not looking for an answer, but that's the question I'm posing to myself. Fuck if I'm not thinking about that during my workouts.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/11/17 03:02 PM
1

Man, you dug back there. Ugh. I'm trying man. I'm trying like hell to let it all go and not be so neck deep in someone else's view of myself. Here's what I've let go of or accepted: 1) That she was hypergamous in college and when she needed security found that in me. 2) I've lived the righteous white knight my whole life and only last year did I rip that off. 3) Should she cheat or stray, that's her choice. I may know or not, but should I find out, I need to have a plan to address it. 4) She wil…
/r/MarriedRedPill02/11/17 07:09 PM
5

As I'm so often reminded - we're all a bunch of fucks - men sharing notes. Nothing more, nothing less. Some of us can call each other on our BS. That's why we come here.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/11/17 12:50 PM
1

$400 online training class, $650 exam. If you're already spending the $650, spend the extra $400 and get the cert. Write it off on your taxes. Might as well do that since you can't write off cheating, lazy, harpy, bitch. Government doesn't give handouts ;)
/r/MarriedRedPill02/11/17 11:23 AM
1

Agreed. Lifting and eating better. But I'm not doing it for the randos. I'm doing it for me. I'm still mulling over whether I go all in and start slaying pussy or not. I haven't articulated well yet in my own head and it's right now, just a fantasy.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/11/17 09:22 AM
1

Agreed. Which is the single biggest reason I haven't done it yet. Because it IS validation seeking behavior. I could indulge, but that feels like masturbation at the end of the day, and I don't like feeling empty.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/11/17 09:21 AM
1

Wow. That is a hard mental framework to undo. I saw this, and thought about it, and have been thinking about it. My entire worldview is driven by performance. Has been since I was a child. If I am not the sum whole of my actions, then what am I? Flipping the script right is pretty interesting. This is a minor paradigm changing revelation for me. Thanks.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/11/17 09:18 AM
1

There's a lot in my mental framework that I have to deconstruct and evaluate if what I do is truly intrinsically motivated or extrinsic. Man, if I knew what my mission was before, it was to get married, have kids, get my PhD, work for NASA. That was essentially a child's dream because it ends at 30. My mission now? Fuck if I know. Right now it's not to blow my brains out from continually feeling like I'm rejected by the person that should love me the most. Yes, I get that's laden with huge cover…
/r/MarriedRedPill02/11/17 09:13 AM
1

We can learn something from this too. So say you fuck up big. Let's take common behavior - she catches you with porn. She blows up, goes through the "I can't compete, I don't even know you anymore, we're different people, our fairy tale is over" nuclear meltdown. Shakes your worldview - burns it down frankly. Then, she says, "You won't even say I'm sorry!" What do you do? How do you handle this? I've had a lot of time to reflect, since this exact scenario happened to me. Second time she found my…
/r/MarriedRedPill01/11/17 07:36 PM
1

You're still fixated on how your wife fucked your best friend, and fucked your best friend's fiancee before she was your best friend's fiance... Sounds hot, but it never included you. What do you want? All the other stuff is tactics and getting shit done. You know how to get shit done. You aren't where you are because you don't know that skill. YOu might lack discipline and consistence, but again, you know how to cultivate that and get it done. So as you improve your physique, ask yourself what …
/r/MarriedRedPill01/11/17 03:13 PM
1

A woman who desires her man will spend money to make things homely. edit: negotiate the terms always. but you know that.
/r/MarriedRedPill31/10/17 07:12 PM
1

Why not?
/r/MarriedRedPill31/10/17 07:05 PM
2

WK 17 Physical Baseline physical. Eating much better this week, not consistent with my supplements though. Didn’t miss a lifting session, but if I’m honest with myself, I’m still vaging it. I know from last year, that my workouts were far more intense. I was doing two-adays, Lift in the morning, Insanity in the afternoon, on off days I’d run, do burpees, pushups, and pullups. I’m not even doing a decent warmup right now – which was a good 15 minute routine. I’m satisfied with the fact that I’m s…
/r/MarriedRedPill31/10/17 01:49 PM
1

what happened to your dad?
/r/MarriedRedPill28/10/17 01:58 PM
2

I know I've struggled with the idea that Self-Improvement is masturbation for some time, and I think only recently came to understand it in context. I don't intend to say that self-improvement is bad, but what should come with it is an internal assessment that looks at what motivates us. Do I care about what my wife thinks of me? Yes, actually, I do. But do I do the things I'm doing because I'm motivated by pleasing her and avoiding her displeasure with me? If I am, then I need to dig a little d…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/10/17 02:27 PM
2

I like that. I got thinking about this quote, because it always bothered me. As you stated, we know self-improvement is masturbation - so is all this improvement we're doing bad? No, not inherently, but intent and approach matters.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/10/17 02:16 PM
1

Thanks for posting this. I had read that article just prior to posting. It was that last line that got me thinking. He’s not saying self improvement is bad, but it doesn’t mean anything without detachment.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/10/17 11:58 AM
3

I too love Jocko. And Joe Rogan. And Tim Ferris. Between the three of them, I don't even listen to music anymore. I miss that, but I've replaced it with something better. But. I keep Tyler Durden's voice in my mind. "Self improvement is masturbation", now self destruction..." It's only after we have destroyed our ego can we resurrect ourselves and be free.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/10/17 09:30 AM
1

It's probably the biggest baddest demon in these parts, and it resides in all of us. So long as you keep that in front of you. Good work on more "I's" in that last paragraph ;)
/r/MarriedRedPill27/10/17 09:19 AM
2

Good. All good progress. I'm still seeing a lot of external validation in your writing. Not saying it's a bad thing, progress is not instantaneous. I just hope that eventually your lens gets refocused on yourself. Are you happy in your own skin? Irrespective of if she's a harpy bitch who decides to throw away your marriage. You should also know that she will never give you credit for your self-improvement. She may say you did it all by yourself, like a mother says of her son. It took her shittin…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/17 06:50 PM
1

It's good you recognize you have a way to go. And it's good you can enjoy the moment when you see it. I have trouble with that. Good work. That said, I'm reading a lot of external love and action towards you. How are you feeling? Are you loving the relationship you have with your red pilled self? Are you showing yourself respect and loyalty? Are you satisfied in the way you're taking charge and being a family leader? What happens when you get shit tested by your wife - when she decides that mayb…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/10/17 10:24 AM
1

That's the trick ain't it? Get clear on who you are, who you want to be, and be comfortable in your own skin.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/10/17 07:03 PM
1

So where did they fail in teaching you? Or did you not learn? How do you take the lessons from that to teach your kids? I'm curious because my dad was weak. I look at him differently now, he's remade himself a million times, and he's got an iron frame despite classic beta behaviors and mistakes he made while I was growing up and watching him. But I'm also internalizing what it means to be a man and trying to exude it at home - and where appropriate teach my girls and my son.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/10/17 05:57 PM
1

First, my initial reaction in my head was "if I was the guy you cheated with I am sure you'd be on my dick by now." and "If you know the problem and feel guilty then just fix it." The rub on that is that is attacking feels with logic and it doesn't work. I second the codependency read from /u/man_in_the_world. It completely sucks when your validation comes from a wife who doesn't really want you, and you can't figure out if you even want her. My read is that you haven't gotten past her cheating …
/r/MarriedRedPill25/10/17 05:54 PM
1

Self-flegellation is lazy, because we use it as an excuse to avoid seeing ourselves as our own mental point of origin. I do it all the time. I don't see my own value or worth in any other terms than how I fail. What I've learned to do is blur the lines between work and life. Because truthfully, life at work, and life outside of work are all part of life. It seems to be working, both for good and bad. I'm taking the self worth I find in my work and it's bleeding into my frame outside of work. The…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/10/17 05:05 PM
1

Your writing style strikes me as highly organized and performance driven. You'll have no problem hitting your marks and staying on target. No idea about your frame other than you're afraid of a wife who cheated on you with your best friend. What that says to me is your sense of self-worth is shit. I may be wrong and projecting my own issues a bit, but that's what I'm getting from this post. If I'm right, it will be your biggest issue.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/10/17 01:14 PM
1

Physical Back to lifting and eating well this week. Staying busy and getting out of my head as Stone suggests. Went to the doctor, ordered blood tests, and perhaps a sleep study. Energy is low, libido feels low. Full workup should give me an indication for what's good and not. Following foundmyfitness. Next up is the 23andme test followed with the genetic assays. I'd like to know where best to supplement. IN the meantime, I've started taking Vitamin D 1000 IU, fish oil, and a multivitamin. Frame…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/10/17 01:01 PM
2

Thanks for the advice. Hit it last night, a little sore, but not terrible at all.Feels good to get back in the saddle.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/10/17 03:03 PM
1

I'm in SL 5x5, about three weeks in, not currently heavy, but progressively going up. Working in other lifts in between squat reps right now. Starting to breathe hard and sweat. I try to max out reps on the last set.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/10/17 05:43 PM
1

Yes, I'm doing my own work, and that comes with a lot of hard work, but without a community like this, I'm not sure I would have gotten there. There's value here. That's why I'm here. And that's why some retards are worth their weight. Just saying thanks for giving a shit and appreciating the hard work. Don't get me wrong, I'm not giving you a reach-around.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/10/17 04:48 PM
1

But def a day between heavy lifts nonetheless. Right?
/r/MarriedRedPill17/10/17 04:44 PM
1

That is the essence of frame - where you are the ultimate arbiter of your entire existence. For most of my life I have prized being a student, and being compliant. I can blame early childhood trauma, but that doesn't unfuck my mindset now. Much of my validation seeking behavior is looking for acceptance and approval from my mother. And it's manifesting itself in everything I do. It's Freudian, ugly, and sad. I honestly don't know how to be my own arbiter. I've read everything, reflect, get pysch…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/10/17 01:10 PM
1

I appreciate that insight. I have such a short memory that I forget about the pain until I get back to it. Then it hurts like a bitch. Do you recommend back to back sessions or day rest in between? I'm hitting session one tonight. I plan on active recovery tomorrow with the Happy Body Routine followed by some HIIT sprints. Back to heavy lift on Thursday. I made the decision yesterday to go home and get some rest for today. I'm ready today for sure.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/10/17 12:33 PM
1

Physical Last week was a fucking mess of a week. Had a major interview on Friday and I spent the entire week prepping. I let lifting go and I feel like shit for that. I'm now at 12 days since my last lift. Fuck that happens fast. I read Stone's post, and what stuck with me was that despite his 4 hour sleep schedule and the crazy hours he ran, he still had time to lift. I believe I read the same thing about Dwayne Johnson. No matter what, the gym is paramount. Tiredness is not an excuse. Lack of …
/r/MarriedRedPill16/10/17 03:14 PM
1

I like that even better than You do you
/r/MarriedRedPill16/10/17 10:19 AM
1

passive were serious contributing factors to my wife's lack of attraction to me. passive were serious contributing factors to being unattractive, not attractive. FTFY Red, I get what and Ruiz are doing, you're trying to lay out a road map for the socially awkward. But gawd, the mindset man. I can imagine a guy trying to implement step 1, failing, and coming back to say, I FAILED! YOUR MAP SUCKS! To which the answer is, no man, you MAP (Mindful attraction plan) sucks. You're trying tactics when y…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/10/17 07:44 AM
1

You just hit a nerve. Not sure what kind of pain it is yet. I'll let you know next week.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/10/17 11:57 PM
1

Printing this out and stapling it to my arm.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/10/17 10:13 PM
1

with awareness comes truth. I'll figure out when I'm lying to myself, but I'll always know when I pull the wool over my eyes won't I? I lied to myself when I believed "She was the one", so when that oneitis creeps back again, I'm aware of it. I didn't pay all her debt, I'm paying all her debt, and mine too. The shitty thing is now that she's bringing some modicum of income, she wants to spend it on her business and the "fun stuff" instead of the debt. But ultimately, it's shitty because I let it…
/r/MarriedRedPill10/10/17 10:04 PM
1

That's the whole reason I'm raging at myself, what the honest fuck. How did I get here where given the opportunity, my wife would rather go to Rome without me, than with me. How the hell can I be so damn unattractive that she wouldn't say at least, "Damn babe, I want to go to Rome, but I don't want to go without you". I know the answer to that. This week I rewrite my map.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/10/17 05:10 PM
1

It is. I puke, regroup, learn, and grow. Not effectively, but that's how I've been operating.
/r/MarriedRedPill09/10/17 05:05 PM
2

I know. But I can't do that from a position of weakness. Which is to say, I'm undisciplined. First order of business is to be credible. Not for her, but for myself. Getting pissed at her is a reflection of my own weakness. The agreement we made when got married and started having kids some 15 years ago was I'd wirk and she'd raise the kids. That was stupid, yes, but my word nonetheless. And if there's one thing that I know, it's that your reputation and creibility is more important than life. An…
/r/MarriedRedPill05/10/17 06:28 PM
2

Took a month hiatus when all kinds of shit went down. Had a break-in, two camping trips, back to school, and generally was not thinking about immediate goals. Was just living day to day. It took a conversation with my wife today to bring me back to reality. Go figure. Incoming Victim Puke: because when I write, I gain clarity. Deal with it. She's an author. She got asked to go to Rome next year during our anniversary by another female author. I'm so pissed because I've been suggesting this very …
/r/MarriedRedPill03/10/17 06:47 PM
1

I have a sense that you're dissatisfied with your pet wife - as in this isn't actually what you want. Your writing doesn't have any positive language in it. Just fact. How is your attitude and mental model towards her? Are you still angry?
/r/MarriedRedPill30/08/17 07:43 PM
1

agreed. flip our own bad behaviors around. the wife became the mother, and the man became the boy - because the man wanted to be a boy more than he felt he could be a man.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/08/17 07:24 PM
1

Stats: 5'7", Weight 192 (down from 199 four weekends ago), ~35-40% BF. Week Four Stronglifts. PHYSICAL Made every workout. Starting to add weight and getting heavier. Starting to break a sweat during my lifts. Running the Happy Body Program I heard on the Tim Ferris Podcast with my daughter in the mornings. It's good bonding time. She's showing interest in exercise and physical improvement. I'm enjoying just spending time with her. This week was weak one at home. I still take about a half an hou…
/r/MarriedRedPill30/08/17 05:52 PM
3

Still don't get it Scurve. cheating on your wife. cheating on a rep. Negative connotations - though to different degrees. Right? At any rate, I think I get what you're saying. "Do what you want, and don't feel bad about it. If you feel bad about it, you're not doing what you what."
/r/MarriedRedPill25/08/17 06:58 PM
5

Fuck, I wouldn't know what red pill was if it hit me in the face with its 10" dick. The rest of my post is mostly a reflection on my own part. I struggle having been on the flip side of that relationship dynamic. Wife had an n count of I don't know how high, and I had an n count of her. And there are days when I just want to nuke it all and go slay pussy left and right to restore the balance of power. And there are days when I say, my n count was my fault. Still other days, I say, why am I so fi…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/08/17 06:48 PM
2

Mind if I stick with the lifting analogy? The guy that squeezes out a half rep on the last one would either be totally fine so long as he's getting what he wants. Unless he feels guilty about it, which would be acknowledging that he pussed out on the last rep. I don't understand how a man would be ok with pussing out on the last rep without rationalizing it somehow. How is that getting what you want? Not sure where to take this thought other than I see it as a potential recipe for disaster.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/08/17 06:32 PM
10

And what happens when you get married? And she decides to cheat on you, or drops the "I love you but I'm not in love with you?", or turns starfish? I want to know all that stuff too, but the past is the past. What good would a virgin do me other than stroke my ego? I'd be using her to make me feel better about myself - not by any intrinsic value of self-worth, but simply because she never had anything else to compare to, so I gotta be the best, right? In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man i…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/08/17 06:18 PM
4

I think both of these ideas build on each other. He's talking about commitment. You're talking about cheating. Related but different right? You're both advocating for taking care of your needs first. He's saying break your commitment if you need to. You're saying, don't cheat - because that's breaking your commitment which will cause you to feel bad about yourself (hiding, lying, guilt, etc). You can cheat, and therefore break your commitment, when your needs are met. Commitment is pushing throu…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/08/17 06:05 PM
1

This made my blood boil. I initially wrote: "Your pastor lacks integrity and principle. That he didn't stick around after getting up and giving a speech means he's in it for his own glory. He's not conditioned by his wife, he's just weak and selfish, and will tell you what you want to hear. IF it was a joke, he's picking up what's in the air and regurgitating it." But it comes off as harsh. I leave it here because it's exactly what went through my mind. But I have a number of questions. Is someo…
/r/RPChristians25/08/17 05:38 PM
8

Worthless post. Don't feed the hamster. Fix the man. If you're worried about Chad, it's because you're a fucking pussy. Stop being a pussy and man the fuck up. You're spending your energy in your wife's frame by looking for this crap. As you fix yourself, you'll figure it out. And if you don't, what you don't know won't hurt your little feelers will it?
/r/MarriedRedPill24/08/17 09:26 AM
57

Cause when you're single, you're making minimum wage working part time. When you're a professional in the middle of your career, you're making substantially more. That's the only way 10X works out. I'd like to see those statistics.
/r/TheRedPill23/08/17 09:34 PM
1

Yep. Like, I'm attached to the feeling I get when I get validation and attention. And even for attachments to things, if you dig, you'll find out that those attachments say something about how you feel about you. How do you do the introspection to find that out? I agree, it's tough. One tool I use regularly is the five whys. Works at both work, and internally. Helps you dig dig dig. It also helps to write stream of consciousness style. As you write, you gain clarity. There's a couple of NMMNG gr…
/r/RPChristians23/08/17 06:31 PM
1

Ha! I get that. Took me a while to get through RM, it was tough slogging to get through the style. Personally, I found the narratives in WISNIFG to be immersive, and when I placed myself in those situations, it was an easier read. For NMMNG, I'm going through those exercises again and it's a good recheck of where my mental framework is. Worth visiting and revisiting as you break down old models and build new ones.
/r/RPChristians23/08/17 04:43 PM
2

You misunderstand my meaning. Why are you making something you want conditional on your relationship status? Would you buy the house if you were single, no kids, no wife? If so, why not now? If you're worried about divorce rape, then perhaps you're letting your fear control you. Regarding the last point, you have a third option you know. You can do it. You can become the Masculine Father + Feminine Mother family unit. It's yours for the making.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/08/17 04:40 PM
1

Lol. Nope. I have no idea if you're full of yourself. You certainly talk the talk, but like anyone of us here, the only way we know if we walk the walk is our own internal monologue. I can't prove to you that you're not a neckbeard alpha-wanna be on the internet. But then again, the only person you have to convince is yourself. And that's what I'm saying in this statement. I have to convince myself that I'm worth a damn. When there's a long road ahead to the finish line, it's tough to see that. …
/r/MarriedRedPill23/08/17 04:37 PM
1

molasses is an excuse. I understand the desire to DO something, but the best thing you can DO for yourself right now is read voraciously. You ought to be consuming these books so fast that it hurts the pocketbook a little. Once you read and internalize, THEN the work on building confidence and frame can REALLY accentuate the physical work. That's when you start becoming a complete man. Lift and read like your life depends on it. Because it does.
/r/RPChristians23/08/17 09:11 AM
1

That's a lot of self-talk in the moment isn't it? These things are habits triggered by external stimuli. Of course, that's part of the problem too. It's hard to see myself as killing it when I'm not. Yet I project a lot of fake confidence.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/08/17 09:01 AM
2

with her I don't understand this. Do you or do you not want to buy this house? If you want to buy the house, buy it. If you don't, don't. She comes along for the ride. The truth is I'm fucking afraid that the situation degenerates, I'm afraid of confrontation. That's because you avoid confrontation and don't seek discomfort. More importantly, you haven't internalized WISNIFG. Deida's way out of your league. At this rate, your children will repeat one of two patterns: Weak father + strong mother …
/r/MarriedRedPill23/08/17 08:52 AM
2

You're also not owning your fear of your wife. You know it's there. You can identify it. What are you doing to confront it? WHY are you afraid?
/r/MarriedRedPill22/08/17 09:12 PM
1

Stats: 5'7", Weight 194 (down from 199 three weekends ago), ~35-40% BF. Week Three Stronglifts. PHYSICAL Called doc to schedule T test and general checkup. Made every workout. Still feeling light, but adding in assistance and metcon exercises in between. Logging notes on every exercise. Eating took a dive this weekend. Same with my resistance to smoking. It's these failures that make me question how bad I really want it. Half the time, I forget. The other times, I hamster my way into eating or s…
/r/MarriedRedPill22/08/17 04:56 PM
1

There's a lot to unravel in this analogy of yours. Were you driving? Why did you pick food? Why weren't you prepared? Was there context behind this?
/r/RPChristians22/08/17 03:21 PM
1

I understand completely. Couple of models to keep in your mind. 12 month horizon or more. You're barely into month 1. NMMNG and WISNIFG are very good for helping you reframe. Do the exercises in NMMNG. It will change your perspective. Be with other men. Make time for yourself. It took you years to put on weight, taking off the weight won't happen overnight either. Slow, steady, grind. To not feel like I have to apologize for what I did or did not do. To not feel like I was cheated somehow or tha…
/r/RPChristians22/08/17 01:18 AM
1

How have you dealt with it for the last 30+ years? Here's a question my Priest asks me often: Q: What do the Monks on Mt. Athos do every day? A: Fall down and get back up again.
/r/RPChristians21/08/17 07:32 PM
2

Agreed, though I think we need to be clear too. There's a lot of submission to His will involved - but that doesn't mean to roll over and take it in the ear. It means to see reality, accept reality for what it is, and to take action. You don't stay in an abusive relationship because, "that's God's will". YOu don't marry a basket case because you have a feeling "The Holy Spirit is moving me". Lord knows that there is a mystery at work, but God gives us free will for a reason. And it's absolutely …
/r/RPChristians21/08/17 07:27 PM
2

What do I want? I want to wake up in the morning and not be afraid. I want to be able to get out of bed eager to get started because the prospect of a new day is no longer terrifying to me. I want that more than anything else in the world right now. What you're talking about is living an authentic life, where you can speak and BE without caring what other think. That means having courage to acknowledge fear, face it, and moving through it anyhow despite the consequences. That means looking at yo…
/r/RPChristians21/08/17 07:23 PM
2

Concur with Red. All about abundance. Though it sounds like you're speaking about sexual release? What outlet are you speaking about?
/r/RPChristians21/08/17 12:34 AM
1

If you're going to downvote, please have the courtesy to respond with why.
/r/RPChristians21/08/17 12:32 AM
1

How do you think you handled it? You can ask the internet and a bunch of strange dudes, but weren't there. We are you. What's your reflection? Regarding expression of love. What do you think expressing love looks like? What do you think seeking validation looks like? If you're not sure, take a crack at writing it down. Bring clarity for yourself. For example, are you chasing mommy for a cookie? Or are you grabbing the love of your life to show her how much she means to you - and you're feeling i…
/r/RPChristians21/08/17 12:31 AM
0

With your last line, you know you can't spin plates anyhow, so what is it that you're really asking?
/r/RPChristians19/08/17 09:07 PM
2

Ha! I've heard RCCs being accused of too much logic and the East of too much naval gazing. Some of the early Church fights were just as bad as Reddit trolling.
/r/RPChristians19/08/17 02:05 AM
1

Agreed. The sacraments are so important. Sacrament = Mysterion - Confession and communion go hand in hand. How can we let the weight of our sins go other than through this mystery? Perhaps yes, we could get it out in the open in a small group, but there's a big difference between confessing to a group of other believers and confessing to physician for our souls. And priests are trained to find the right spiritual medicine for us. It's not just do 40 hail Mary's and call it good. It's an act of o…
/r/RPChristians19/08/17 01:56 AM
2

It's funny, another RC friend of mine and I will have these discussions and come to conclude that RC isn't all that different, except there's a lot more doctrine and dogma behind RC. Orthodoxy usually doesn't choose to expound unnecessarily. Sure there are books and people write perspectives, but all in context and in reference to the Church Fathers. So we'll say, "But why do you have to say it that way?" Ah well. Some day, I pray, we will see a communion of sorts if not outright healing.
/r/RPChristians18/08/17 05:45 PM
2

Interesting, never heard that in Orthodoxy. We see Mary as the Ark and God-Bearer, and we pray to her for her intercessions. But then again, this is one of those differences I believe. Orthodoxy doesn't see the Theotokos as a co-redeemer or in some way more divine than mankind. I could not argue against this eloquently other than to say this is not a view the Orthodox Church holds. But to draw from your example, yes, we pray for redemption and intercessions daily and hourly if we must. This only…
/r/RPChristians18/08/17 11:40 AM
8

Red Pill Haiku FTW. This needs to be enshrined somewhere.
/r/TheRedPill18/08/17 11:09 AM
1

It's the same principle as excommunication. The Church is constant (or rather it SHOULD be), and communal. When we choose to believe or act outside of doctrine, WE have nexted ourselves from communion with the Church. Again, to our own damnation. You're welcome, and good luck on your trial.
/r/RPChristians18/08/17 10:50 AM
1

Thoroughly enjoyable discussion. Agreed a man does not need to be fully complete before learning how to lead, but rather to be on the path to complete. And that a man doesn't announce, "Let me delegate this responsibility to you", or "You do this, I'll do this". There's a certain respect for a person's will and autonomy that's necessary, which is why I go back to persuasion and finding the right mix of ethos, pathos, and logos to win a person over. It's the tactic that Chuck Colson talks about w…
/r/RPChristians18/08/17 12:47 AM
2

Automatic upvote for Jack10. Yes, the path to getting there is much rougher than it needs to be - but that's why men come to Reddit, MRP, and perhaps now RPChristian. They're in a bad way. They fell off the map. Forgot what it meant to be a man, and forgot what it meant to love a woman. A TON of work done is internal work, frame rebuilding, and ego-blasting. It's messy. It's ugly. But it's necessary. What I'm arguing in this exchange is that leadership styles and tactics may be fine in persuasio…
/r/RPChristians17/08/17 10:32 PM
1

Jesus says, "If people don't respond to the grace I offer ... next." Hmm. That may be a fundamental great Salvation discussion. Our understanding is this: GOd's love burns white hot, it exists. Heaven is accepting it - choosing His love. Hell is rejecting it. An analogy I've heard used often is the Father from the Prodigal Son story. His love for his sons never changes. It was ever present. The Prodigal rejected it, and then accepted it. The Righteous brother accepted it, then rejected it. Jesus…
/r/RPChristians17/08/17 10:28 PM
1

Thank you for the depth and response. So, the guy has to get his own act in order first before he can start doing any of this. I just take that as a given that doesn't need to be said. I think that's where I've had some dissonance. Why would a man who has his act together stumble on to Reddit, Married Red Pill, and RPChristian? A lot of us are leaders in the workplace and know how to dominate at work, but have absolutely fallen down at home - or rather, we've forgotten that work and home and lif…
/r/RPChristians17/08/17 10:15 PM
1

And so many cradle Orthodox and Catholics could learn a thing or too from Protestants. Nobody knows the scripture better than you guys. It might be a little forced, I'll admit, but I also think RP and Christian Masculinity can be a bit forced too. I think so much of what's talked about in this sub is Headship/Body type of relationship - where Christ is the Agape love - selfless giving without expecting anything in return (i.e. no covert contracts). And the body responds by accepting or rejecting…
/r/RPChristians17/08/17 07:24 PM
1

Fair rebuttal. I often train small group leaders. This is a concept that Red thought would be useful in the "how to" stuff here, so here goes. Although this was developed for group-leading, I apply these concepts in my marriage as well. I'll try to keep it in that context. Why? Why is it important to know the types of leadership styles? What I'm losing here is what does this information do for me? Why does knowing your MBTI, for example, help at home - or anywhere else really? These are fine too…
/r/RPChristians17/08/17 07:13 PM
1

"I worry that if you got a job and made your own money, you'd leave me."
/r/RPChristians17/08/17 05:29 PM
0

Forgive me. This seems awfully autist. I appreciate the taxonomy, but leadership comes from first leading yourself. If you cannot be an example, how will you possibly lead others? There's a million books, blogs, and other writings on leadership out there. Though I appreciate the effort, there is better content. What makes a leader? Why should anyone follow you? Ever? What makes you follow anyone else? These are questions that the self-help industry and the business world have been dealing with f…
/r/RPChristians17/08/17 05:19 PM
1

This Week. Gym times made every single time. Eating is improving substantially. I'm more disciplined in eating habits than I was three weeks ago. My ability to resist and say no is improving. I'm embracing hunger. I'm building mental toughness in the moment. I've started a fitness accountability group with about 10 buddies from college and work, and we're keeping each other motivated. Mostly by calling each other out on eating shit and missing workouts. Good mix of guys, some who have built a ha…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/17 04:51 PM
14

Red pill truths are an element of masculinity. Sure the name of the of the group is Married Red Pill, but it might as well be called Self-Help that actually fucking works. This is where we come to grow the fuck up.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/17 04:37 PM
3

Thank you for this post. I have a huge boner now.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/08/17 04:24 PM
1

Everyone is always watching. What's your vision of a quality man? I'm curious because I'm going through this idea myself. Rebuilding my MAP and such.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/17 02:07 PM
3

I'll shed a tear for you. I won't say I seek validation from my children. I'm the parent after all. But I do enjoy it when they see me the way I want to be seen.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/17 10:32 AM
1

PHYSICAL Down a lb this week. Switched to SL and started from scratch. I wanted to put plates on those bars. I really did. Watching my own reaction to this was interesting. Telling me how much I'm still invested in what I think other people think of me. Clearly I DGAF for not the right reasons. Nutrition is dialing in, mostly to establish the habits and routines. Water, water, water, water. Eggs, canned tuna, canned chicken, and salad with lemon as dressing. WHAT DO I WANT Last week I looked at …
/r/MarriedRedPill10/08/17 10:29 AM
4

Congratulations brother. Enjoy. Men experience the highest highs, and the lowest lows. The first five years are pure joy. Remember to take lots of video clips along the way. You'll need those memories.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/08/17 07:23 PM
1

Thanks. I think I'm seeing that now. I definitely overtrained the first part of the week and I couldn't move. It was beyond muscle soreness. I did 5x5 a year ago on smith machines at Planet Fitness, and I did see some progression. I don't think it's too late for me to switch back to 5x5 though. I think I'm going to pivot back to 5x5 for next week. Curious though, how do you handle recovery without sleep? I can afford maybe 6.5 hours of sleep a night. I know it's not 8 like I should get though. S…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/08/17 04:00 PM
1

Week 3 - Skipped out on Week two. Week three. Signed up at the Gym, decided to go with Wendler's 5/3/1. So far so good. Nutrition is on point. Workouts are on point. Body hurts. DOMS blow. Anyone know how to ensure recovery goes well while on a deficit? Soreness is my biggest issue - simply because I want to get other things done during the day, and I really don't want to be sore. Sex is good - 3-4 times of a week, enthusiasm lacks on my end more than hers. Sometimes due to fatigue, sometimes du…
/r/MarriedRedPill02/08/17 08:58 PM
1

Reading yours and Red-Curious' replies, it seems like you two have differing opinions. Or is it that the laws are designed to be more fair, but the judges executing the law are still biased? You also say that a prenup is the way to go, yet he states that a well-crafted prenup gives you the best of both worlds. I suppose I would invite u/red-curious to participate. I'm not looking for lawyer jousting here, but the manosphere has been railing against Marriage 2.0 for a while now. Have men stood up…
/r/MarriedRedPill02/08/17 08:45 PM
1

C'mon Red. As prolific as you are, that's all? What did you find interesting?
/r/RPChristians30/07/17 11:38 AM
1

This is good, you're giving me an opportunity to dig into Patristics which is something I've wanted to do for a while. St. John Chrysostom writes: (I have bolded those statements that I believe are summaries or succinct statements within his sermon** 2. For beginning from those passions, which most belong to our whole race, anger, I mean, and desire (for it is these chiefly that bear absolute sway within us, and are more natural than the rest); He with great authority, even such as became a legi…
/r/RPChristians28/07/17 08:17 PM
1

July 1 or so I discovered RP, which gave context to what I had started and helped me focus my efforts with a more laser precision. We had a new baby on June 19, but starting in July, after my wife had a couple weeks of recovery, she started responding sexually (just no PIV). Financially, we're better than we've ever been. Family life is solid, and I'm even getting my unruly 3yo under control. Sex is back on the table, although I'm hoping to start gradually pushing boundaries in mid-August. Becau…
/r/RPChristians24/07/17 06:08 PM
1

1) Remains to be seen. I believe RP is a stepping stone to Christian living. One must live for himself before living for others to truly understand what that means. "To be a gentleman, you must first be a man" 2) Mallory - Arthurian Legends/ Enlightenment and Victorian era where greater good of society degenerated to "every person for themselves". The reason that's happened in the Christian west is a failure to stick through conflict. "I don't like this pastor, I'll go set up my own church". How…
/r/RPChristians24/07/17 04:26 PM
2

One can afford to be blunt over the internet. I don't really know you, and you don't really know me. We are building a relationship over the internet here, and it's good that it's starting off where iron sharpens iron. If you say something that makes me get butthurt - that's on me. I need to think through the why and the how. I think you recognize the value in that as well. And when it comes to building men, we need to be blunt, if we really care about the state of Christian Masculinity - which …
/r/RPChristians24/07/17 11:31 AM
1

I am a firm believer in writing it down so you can stare at your monkey mind with objectivity, so a journaling app like 750 words or penzu might be good. But I also completely agree that a friend to bounce off of is key. Iron sharpens iron.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/07/17 07:46 PM
1

K. I can't say I agree. I do hope you reconsider, because your wife needs time to respond to your changes, and a vasectomy is a virtually irreversible change. If we control the gateway to commitment, we've taken one of our most powerful levers, the threat that the female cannot claim exclusivity to our commitment. If you make this change and she still hasn't responded (despite not being on BC) What then? Remember, she'll have a high libido for the right alpha. You can be that man. I also invite …
/r/RPChristians23/07/17 06:49 PM
2

Have you read mmsl or athol Kay? Rational make? You are on track to make a very permanent decision. This is the essence of you biological imperative and you're cutting it off. For the record, I had one done in my early 20's after three kids and to this day I regret it. I feel a loss of power. should anything happen in the future, I have no way of further rebuilding my legacy. I feel a loss in virility. Is this due to the vasectomy? I don't know, but I wonder. If you still want to do this, Please…
/r/RPChristians22/07/17 11:52 AM
1

Your wife sounds like she behaves exactly like mine does when she "gets angry". It's tough to stay light and happy when you're getting the silent treatment and emotional abuse. But yes - that resentment will kill you. Not sure exactly what it all was but I'm guessing there was some relationship PTSD going on. Check out TFA's posts on getting over it. It was motivating, at least for me. https://thefamilyalpha.com/2017/06/09/getting-over-your-relationship-ptsd-pt-ii-give-love-one-more-chance/
/r/MarriedRedPill21/07/17 11:33 AM
2

YW.
/r/RPChristians21/07/17 10:56 AM
1

Exactly. Which is why I think the MRP sub is still a good Man-building arena. I wonder though, for those Christian men that aren't unplugged, how they get to this point? Especially since so many Church's have been feminized. Even the men's groups are weak.
/r/RPChristians21/07/17 10:54 AM
2

OP-SEC on your journal is key. PENZU, encrypted. Or electronic encrypted file on a secure account. DO NOT WRITE IT DOWN PHYSICALLY. The risk of electronic discovery is still there too, but your family's opportunities to discover content will be drastically reduced. Your journal is a place to write down your deepest thoughts - and too often it's incoherent, dark, and contrary. You don't want someone to find the demons you're trying to exorcise.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/07/17 12:35 AM
1

Totally get that, and kudos. But language is important, and the devil intrudes into our pysche with the words we choose - even if they are unconscious. That's why I took issue with "don't let it get stale". It sounds like bad marriage counselor advice like "go on date night".
/r/RPChristians20/07/17 06:08 PM
1

Ok, perhaps I'm reading too much into it. Why isn't "Be so awesome/successful/fun/attractive/funny/etc." enough? Why add a conditional statement to it saying that "everything outside the marriage [with me] looks boring in comparison? The converse is - If you're not awesome, everything outside the marriage with you will look exciting to her. If I'm not focussed on being quality, things will get stale. Then what? "She'll leave! or "she'll treat me like crap!" The implied fear in the statement colo…
/r/RPChristians20/07/17 04:51 PM
2

Rambo's autistic brother - surly, pouty, STFU/DGAF guy Rambo's a fun dude.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/07/17 04:00 PM
1

Jeebus you guys write a lot. St John Chrysostom has a homily on Mathew here. The discussion on divorce starts about halfway down the page: Point 4. He says, and forgive me for paraphrasing St. John the Goldenmouth, that putting away a wife you are angry with was the right commandment, because the Jews were prone to murder. So a Jewish man who hated his wife should divorce his wife because chances are he'd kill her if he was forced to keep her - woman being the weaker of the sexes. And he goes on…
/r/RPChristians20/07/17 03:32 PM
1

"get stale" implies a covert contract. "I need to do things to keep things fresh so she won't leave me." Be so awesome/successful/fun/attractive/funny/etc. and introduce enough novelty that everything outside the marriage looks boring in comparison. Do you see the covert contract in that statement? You're still in her frame. Get in yours. How many I statements did you use? How many she? Your efforts need to be directed to God, and loving yourself. Your energy and life is good. What she does with…
/r/RPChristians20/07/17 02:30 PM
3

Here's my thought on the matter: Don't replicate what's already done, add to the conversation by baptizing RP ideas. This is certainly the place to post "in the trenches" questions when looking for Christian guidance. OYS and [FR] - post in TRP/MRP. The bulk of the framework and reading has already been established. There's no point in recreating that. The work done there is profound, and if you're a man, the crucible is necessary to make you better. Iron sharpens iron. I am unsure of the RP wom…
/r/RPChristians20/07/17 02:13 PM
1

Answer: Yes, it was an RP move, but you are not RP - nor are you the man God created you to be. It's a harsh answer, but let me state what I'm seeing from your write-up: You're still hung up on her, and it still hurts. Totally understandable. Most likely, she was screwing the Muslim, and she's lukewarm in her faith. But this isn't about her, it's about you. RP, and I think especially RP for Christians, is about becoming the head - agape love, self-sacrificial, without expecting it in return. Bec…
/r/RPChristians20/07/17 01:56 PM
1

Exactly. It could have been realistic, but when my motivation wasn't there, I chose to let the effort and the number bother me. I didn't push through the discomfort and the soreness to continue. To be fair, however, I was worried about injury starting at 100/100 every day out of the gate. That's why I'm going to SL. I did it before and I loved it. Started off "easy", and never got so overwhelming that I couldn't do it. It was just the right amount of lifts.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/07/17 11:33 AM
1

a little worried that would be jumping in over my head. So what? The worst that can happen is...? analyze my goals It sounds like you might be someone who loves planning and analyzing. I know I do that too. I might say, go do. Analyze afterwards in your reflection. You learn from this community by doing, and that's the emphasis. It's easy to get caught up in mental masturbation and edutainment. I think you'll like hunting. Get out with nature and other men. Enjoy the feeling. Even IF your intern…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/07/17 03:36 PM
1

I was where you were with hunting a year ago. I went on a hunting trip with a good friend from college. Went to his cabin and hung out with his dad and their buds. We didn't shoot anything, and it was damn cold. I'll go back to do it again though. Couple of thoughts I want to pass along to you from my experience: 1) Check your motivations. You may want to hunt cause it's "manly". That was my internal monologue, despite telling myself I want to hunt for the food my family eats (similar to your th…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/07/17 11:30 AM
1

OYS Week 2 Still the most important thing is lifting and health. Goal was 100 pushups and 100 squats a day. So I should have done 700 last week. I did 300. Not a great start, but looking back at it, I'm establishing habits right now. The days I did it, I woke up, and did it as the most important thing I was going to do that day. Hit target food intake of below 1500 cal three days this past week as well. Rest of the days, I ate higher amounts of food, but around 2000 cal. Still too high for calor…
/r/MarriedRedPill19/07/17 10:50 AM
1

So how does that work? Sin and live a debauche dlife, then work your way to salvation? Are you repentant of your past? Do you wish you were? Sounds a lot like, "have a hell of a great time, and confess Jesus on your death bad" to maximize fun and salvation. I'm sure that's not what you intended, but that's what I"m reading.
/r/RPChristians17/07/17 04:49 PM
2

You bring up an excellent point. For all the living righteously we do (or try), we hit points in our lives where we're the brother in the Prodigal Son story. And we're pissed we didn't get to go squander our inheritance. I guarantee this happens more often than not in society today, with wifely N counts being higher (sometimes substantially higher) than men's. I don't know what the statistics are, but I bet Christian males on average stay chaste, whereas their wives do not. And not necessarily b…
/r/RPChristians17/07/17 11:10 AM
1

Agreed. Habits went to shit after a trip. Never recovered. Then again, one might argue I never had those habits to begin with - and I was only working hard. work like hell on being consistent If I had to sum up why I fail at anything, it's this. I can work hard at anything for a given period of time. This might be my defining challenge. Thanks.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/07/17 04:18 PM
5

I can feel your pain as I read this. But you know, as well as I, that there are good days and bad days. You also know how to discipline your mind to work through the discomfort. You've done this with lifting, you can do this with the emotional pain. I don't know exactly what your issue is, but it seems that the oneitis you're displaying is manifesting itself because of your own personal insecurities. For me, I never felt good enough about myself. And that comes from putting your mental point of …
/r/MarriedRedPill11/07/17 05:23 PM
2

I wanted it bad enough that I spent 2016 dropping 45 lbs on my way to being lean. in 2017, I took my eye off the ball and now I'm 35 lbs heavier. But you're right. I didn't want it bad enough this year. Do I want it bad enough now? I won't know that until I do it. Ergo the last sentence. One day at a time, one week at a time. Edit: Spelling/compression
/r/MarriedRedPill11/07/17 03:47 PM
2

One year hiatus from Reddit. In that time, I’ve improved, failed, improved, and failed again. I was improving regularly when I was journaling, and OYS was the best way to do that for me. Keeping opsec clear though. Nothing handwritten, three account jumps to get to reddit account. No passwords and no writing anywhere else. These are my thoughts and my actions. I’m posting here for you to see my hamster, and if you care enough, help me slay the dirty little beast. Physical: Fell off the wagon har…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/07/17 03:05 PM
2

WTF man, do you even spreadsheet? Everyone knows that the beauty in spreadsheets is all about formatting. And really tight formulas with sparklines and graphs. But seriously. A well-formatted spreadsheet is a work of art. TLDR - Salvation doesn't depend on accuracy as long as the tables are pretty.
/r/MarriedRedPill06/06/16 01:41 AM
7

So you don't like sex with your wife cause it's duty sex. You want some high quality sex. At the root of most of our issues is that we want high quality sex, which means desire. We all know you can't negotiate desire. But yet you're doing that with a hooker. How does that work? Maybe she fakes desire cause it's her job, but doesn't that doubt still bother you? Do you really feel like you're a man women want to fuck? I mean, I get you're saying its a solution to a problem, but isn't it like using…
/r/MarriedRedPill01/06/16 01:47 PM
4

Yes. Yes you do. I didn't lift for the first 30+ years off life, now, I can't imagine my life with the only friend that doesn't judge me.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/05/16 11:48 AM
7

Of their own doing. Anger stems from ego investment doesn't it? When you give a fuck, and shit doesn't go the way you want, you'll be pissed. It's only natural. It's also a necessary evil that helps you come to terms with your own identity, wants, and needs. The woman cheated. You're pissed. Yeah yeah, it's your turn, blah blah. But the fact is, stated or unstated, there is absolutely a mutual understanding of exclusivity - and that contract is broken. What I take away from this article, and the…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/05/16 12:04 PM
7

From cars to sink disposals to tiling. Plan, think through the project, but never let her see the sausage being made.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/05/16 11:24 PM
2

He's so pissed he'll try it. Then he'll be pissed it worked. Then he will swallow the pill.
/r/askMRP26/05/16 09:04 PM
3

Some people actually ARE autistic and don't appreciate hyperbole. Others are just douche canoes
/r/MarriedRedPill26/05/16 08:12 PM
2

Listen to this op. Quit the hamsteri'm get and go to the gym today. In three hours, take off early, stop at the gym and sign up. Then stay and do SOMETHING even if you're still in your work clothes. Get moving now or you'll always find a reason not to do it now.
/r/MarriedRedPill26/05/16 03:37 PM
2

How bout a little more? Me be a Fr in OYS weekly?
/r/MarriedRedPill26/05/16 03:33 PM
1

Not that I have a clue, but something tells me Sara would have gone on a date with you. Not worth the shit tests and games though. I totally get that. You get enough at home, you don't need that from a plate.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/05/16 07:50 PM
3

So can a good bowel movement no?
/r/MarriedRedPill25/05/16 06:54 PM
1

I'ma copy this and post it somewhere. Thanks. Great stuff for me to chew on. I haven't gotten to bp's dread game yet, that comes after WISNIFG. Very well thought out response.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/05/16 05:10 PM
1

Agreed. I might take it one step farther. We know in our guts something isn't right, but we can't articulate it. That's why the red pill is so jarring. It doesn't change a man's perspective so much as it brings clarity to his discomfort. Otherwise, why seek information?
/r/MarriedRedPill25/05/16 02:10 PM
1

Ok. Let me take a go at this. In having an expectation, I'm invested in the outcome. I get that I need to lift and clear the covert contracts. But if my expectations for certain behavior are "I want her to want me" or "I want her to enjoy raising children" or "I want her to want to take care of her family". Well that's setting myself up for failure right? I can't control other people's desires or behavior. So my only recourse is to double down on my own values and execute them in my own life. At…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/05/16 12:45 PM
1

I was thinking about your comment on the drive in. A paradigm shift does occur, and is the beginning of growth, but change does not happen overnight. Years of habits and comfort are the barrier to true growth. As one of my mentors so succinctly put it: shit is fucked up for a reason. So in terms of Training The Brain, it takes sustained conscious effort. To enjoy the ride, I have to relearn how to enjoy the ride, and I have to work at it until the point where I can enjoy the ride without thinkin…
/r/MarriedRedPill25/05/16 12:35 PM
1

Baby Jesus says spreadsheets are the way to salvation.
/r/MarriedRedPill25/05/16 01:46 AM
2

I'll rephrase then. I had ambition. I lost it, and I got real Betamax. I'm off to find it again. The point about the woman and "feeling alive" is that me being a pussy Betamax is only going to kill any attraction or desire. What she will be attracted to, and what she wants, is to feel her feels and feel desire. There's no chance of eliciting those feels if I don't own myself. And the thing of it is, I cant fake owning myself just to make her wet. Doesn't work that way. I need to do that for me. …
/r/MarriedRedPill24/05/16 09:52 PM
1

I do believe this warrants further discussion. For example, how does one become OI and IDGAF without lowering expectations for behavior? We can't have no expectations right? Or maybe we can and that's what killing ego is about. Maybe it really is simple as treat another human being with decency and respect without expecting that in return. But danb is THAT hard to do.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/05/16 03:16 PM
3

Wha??? I don't even know how or what I'm supposed to take away from this comment . 😄
/r/MarriedRedPill24/05/16 02:22 PM
1

Is that the moist robot thing that stone keeps talking about?
/r/MarriedRedPill24/05/16 02:15 PM
2

Every comment and discussion offers me something to chew on, but I'll also take it and assert my view. Practicing WISNIFG :). Your comment is appreciated. No butthurt in my end....
/r/MarriedRedPill24/05/16 01:12 PM
1

Shifting the mindset is the mental work you were referring to earlier. A man doesn't just flip a switch and get it. It's a lot of fake it til you make it. I know how I felt at my most ambitious, because I knew what I was working towards. That's a bit nebulous right now, and it's really what WMP spoke about - figure out what you want.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/05/16 12:41 PM
2

The hypergamy reference was a device to show that my vision and strength is what holds my wife's baser instincts at bat. She has no need to give in to hypergamy if she desires her man. Like your wife does you. So my mission is to find my drive, not to gain my wife's exclusivity. Because if I try that - become better for her - I haven't become better at all. No. I need to be better for me. And she will follow AND WANT to follow.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/05/16 12:37 PM
1

Scurvemuch has the right of it. What happens when one reader gets it and another misinterprets? Though I will say the post was a quick reflection written on mobile. Shitty excuse. I'll take some more time tonight to clarify. The intent behind the post is very much that I lost my drive, and now I'm off to get it back. The funny thing is in my youth, my serve and ambition sort of ended somewhere around the 30 year old mark. I hadn't given myself a long view. I could go off and crest the vision for…
/r/MarriedRedPill24/05/16 12:34 PM
1

Ha! That's me on Friday tho. Absolutely wiped and sore. I used to feel drained too, but then increased rest periods to 90 seconds to 2 minutes. The again, I certainly haven't seen your results so me be in not going hard enough. I'm mid 30's. Edit: DL @ 200 and Squat @ 180. Fuck that was hard.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/05/16 07:39 PM
1

I know it. Almost feels like there's more mental stress than physical. And then you pop out of it jump inning up and down and energized as hell.
/r/MarriedRedPill23/05/16 07:17 PM
1

Yep. First time I heard about it was when I saw Hugh Jackman did it. Now I gotta think of a cool tattoo for that goal :p
/r/MarriedRedPill23/05/16 07:15 PM
3

Fucking awesome and inspirational. My goal is also the 1000 pound club. Your one year story is great fuel for me. 5'7" 180 lbs Bench 110 OHP 90 Squat 185 Deadlift 185 Lifting on SL for 5 months, did a reset twice due to tweaked knee and back muscles. The biggest benefit for me was realizing I was phoning it in on my squats. It was too easy and it didn't bother me. So I added more weight as I warmed up to the 5x5. The value isn't just progressive strength gains, but it's the mental resiliency. Li…
/r/MarriedRedPill23/05/16 11:43 AM
0

Any way to post this and other really good FR in the sidebar?
/r/MarriedRedPill22/05/16 01:16 PM
1

Oh the imagery. Perfect for getting the feelz going. And with a little meat and vengeance, he might even not hate his wife enough to get it up and pound her silly.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/05/16 01:37 PM
1

God damn, that sign alone out of his whole post is making me rage.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/05/16 01:06 PM
1

And your mom only cares about her feelz too
/r/MarriedRedPill19/05/16 04:22 PM
1

Anger is a continuing theme that pops up here. It's why it's in the wiki, and I believe that's why we don't just tell guys to read the sidebar in response. Each one of us deals with anger in a different way pursuant to our own dispositions. I had a similar question on askMRP about two months ago. The discussion, and as usual, Jack's response left me thinking more deeply. Here's the link. Good luck.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/05/16 10:02 AM
0

Heh. That red pill's a big fucking horsepill wrapped in jaggerbushes ain't it? I used to think, "You're so nice" was good, but for some reason, it didn't feel right. For some reason it didn't feel as good as I thought it should and I couldn't figure out why. I don't want "You're nice". I want "Thank you", and "Please", and I want some basic polite behavior. I want desire. I want "I want you in my pussy now".
/r/MarriedRedPill18/05/16 09:20 AM
1

You're enjoying this aren't you?
/r/MarriedRedPill16/05/16 06:01 PM
2

To whoever downvoted this, please give me a rationale behind your downvote. I don't really care about the downvote so much as I'm not learning from someone that has a different perspective.
/r/askMRP14/05/16 01:41 PM
2

If you're going to downvote this, at least have the courtesy to respond with your critical comment.
/r/askMRP14/05/16 01:39 PM
2

Thanks, this is a good reminder. See above for edits and my perspective. In terms of why continue to fuel a dramatic story? My male hamster sees I'm starting to starve it, and it's rebelling. But it's also a necessary step as I get through the reading. If Rational Male and the TRP side bar doesnt' make you flipping angry at yourself, you're either already RP, or you haven't swallowed the RP all the way. I recognize the journey. It's long, and hard. Thank God I lift.
/r/askMRP14/05/16 01:33 PM
1

See edits in original post for details :-P Learning and fixing. You're right man. Long journey. I too am still a fat fuck, but I'm getting better.
/r/askMRP14/05/16 01:29 PM
1

That works well when you're working between women. After 13 years with the same woman who knows so much about you? That's a little trickier beast. Absolutely if I had a new girl, I wouldn't spill anything. But this is also why MRP is TRP on hard mode. Hitting the reset button on the game means taking some heavy losses.
/r/askMRP14/05/16 01:28 PM
1

WISNIFG is next after Rational Male. I've read NMMNG. And yeah. Insecurity - no shit.
/r/askMRP14/05/16 01:26 PM
1

Yep, working on all of that. Part of the MAP really. Spent a lot of time at work this week just figuring out and prioritizing my MAP. I don't think I really did that well. I appreciate the alpha mindset. I also know that I have no business even approaching that shit until I get to 10% BF. So for me, shut up, lift, read, and start executing my map.
/r/askMRP14/05/16 01:25 PM
1

Yes, I have read NMMNG, and much of the other sidebar as well. Here's a great conversation on You do you I don't think we stop caring what our wives think about us. I don't think that's the point at all. IDGAF is about asserting ourselves and actually GAF about ourselves - and realizing that the shit we deal with from our spouses is because we DON'T actually assert ourselves. There's a fine line between stopping caring about our wives opinion of us and becoming a raging dickweed. Of course, I'm …
/r/askMRP14/05/16 01:22 PM
1

I edited the details in the post above. Basically, I didn't STFU or change the subject. In reflecting about it, I think to myself what STFU might really be about. With children, the best tactic to get them to disengage from undesireable behavior is distraction. So perhaps that's an approach I can take with undesireable behavior with my wife, until I grow my balls enough to assert my desires. Amen to sucking it up and doing it. That's what being a man's about ain't it?
/r/askMRP14/05/16 01:13 PM
1

Thanks BPP. I'll finish Rational Male, WISNIFG, and dive into 12 Stages of Dread. I have reasonable expectations though. This is a lifelong change. I'm not just going to flip a switch and become the man I want to be. I've got 36 years of significant cultural programming to overcome.
/r/askMRP14/05/16 01:10 PM
1

Great post. If I may: execute your map, and do it with some urgency and energy you lazy bitch.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/16 03:12 PM
8

Hmmm... Starfish as the final shit test...
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/16 02:31 PM
5

It does. I feel like a chump when I cum first, and she doesn't finish. Like it was duty sex. I'd say if I don't give her an orgasm, my brain thinks sh's going to branch swing. My distaste for starfish is a hypergamy defense. If I didn't care, I would pump and dump.
/r/MarriedRedPill11/05/16 08:44 AM
8

Read your post as if it were from another man. Now, ask yourself: why would she WANT to fuck him or turn around her behaviors? No body weight- lift and lift heavy. Read the sidebar in order. Post to own your shit weekly. Start manning the fuck up. Your phd makes you no more or less fuckable than the mechanic. Actually, the mechanic is probably more fuckable.
/r/MarriedRedPill10/05/16 12:14 PM
2

Read the sidebar, in order. ->
/r/askMRP08/05/16 10:01 PM
1

I'd be interested to see how that pans out. Personally, I was BP until I was too angry to not be anymore, which is when I found RP. Can't speak for other men, but for me it was hard mode or nothing. Sure, in my gut I knew something was wrong with blue pill behavior, but I couldn't put my finger on it. I'd hardly call that slowly waking to RP. Once I found RP, everything came into sharp focus immediately. Unplugging is work, not waking up. That happens on day 1 reading the sidebar wiki.
/r/askMRP08/05/16 08:13 PM
1

The thing is, you don't force this on blue pillars. You don't even convince, argue, or cajole. They (we) find it on our own. If you want to add your voice to the manosphere, then sweet. But if you want to preach the gospel to the plugged in, well, street corner conversions don't really happen or stick without real relationship and sharing pain. No pamphlet ever convinced anyone of anything. Of course, you do you. Something for you to think about as you consider your objectives and your motivatio…
/r/askMRP08/05/16 05:32 PM
1

Don't be butthurt. Sarcasm is how men sharpen each other. Should be part of your manifesto. In fact, tldr it. Man the fuck up and quit being butthurt. Clear and concise. Morality is not manliness and manliness is not morality.
/r/askMRP08/05/16 05:27 PM
6

It's because the anger we feel is us waking up to "I am living a castrated version of the man I thought I would be". Irrespective of sexual frequency, we want to have desire and femininity in our wives. We want them to want us, and we want to want them. When we unplug, we realize that the only way to get there is to want ourselves. And we're mourning our lost years and we're mourning our incompetence because deep down, we know we can be better. That's why reading the sidebar is so crucial - beca…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/05/16 08:01 PM
1

I'm reminded of a few retirement ceremonies I went to for some engineers who had been with us for 40+ years. Arguing with an engineer is like wrestling a pig in mud. Pretty soon you realize he likes it. Stay manly brother and keep up the progress.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/05/16 01:04 PM
1

It sounds like you grew up to enjoy arguing. Do you not enjoy that with her, or do you just not like losing? Said differently, is she reflecting unattractive arguing behavior ( which it seems you enjoy ) or is she reflecting butthurt when she loses - which might reflect that you've lost your frame and don't enjoy that anymore? Thanks for the detail.
/r/MarriedRedPill07/05/16 11:46 AM
2

Ain't it a bitch? All the anger and resentment and you realize it was all you. The trick is not to get sucked into the sunk cost fallacy. I also appreciate your statement about how your wife's distasteful actions are a reflection of yourself. I don't know that I see enough of that analysis here. I think that's a core technique we ought to be employing when we see a lot of "her" and "she" in posts. So what specifically was she reflecting back to you? Or is it the "can't let shit go" that you find…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/05/16 10:39 AM
7

I also can relate. Just last night I thought to myself, why am I always the one cuddling? Why doesn't she reach for me? So fucking beta hamster. You know when she reaches for me? When I fuck her brains out. We used to say we're best friends and that's why we worked so well together... Until I realized I lost all of my confidence and power in turning into a girl, and her into the man. Fuck that. I'm the one with the dick. The masculinity belongs to me. I'm not your friend sweetheart. I'm your cap…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/05/16 06:02 PM
1

You sure you aren't talkin bout your kinks?
/r/MarriedRedPill04/05/16 08:18 AM
1

Explain. We dissect hamsters in Mrp.
/r/MarriedRedPill04/05/16 08:12 AM
2

My motivations and actions are my own. I will clarify why I want to close numbers. I'm not interested in strange pussy. I never have been. Maybe that's blue pill programming, but it's sticking for now. Instead, I'm interested in personal power and confidence. I want to know intrinsically that my value is not defined by her. That I DO have the power to walk away, and I don't have fear of the unknown. Why? Because the only way I know my frame real is to test it. Next shit Teat - am j really OI? Ma…
/r/MarriedRedPill03/05/16 03:20 PM
3

You fucking killed Kenny again didn't you? You bastard!
/r/MarriedRedPill03/05/16 02:02 PM
1

So what? Don't increase your SMV because you could be tempted? Still not following. Tbh, I can't wait til I get to the point where I can close on numbers. Every step along the Mrp journey is to become OPs end state no?
/r/MarriedRedPill03/05/16 12:25 PM
2

Glad to hear. Don't forget to roll down the window and be fucking awesome while you have your foot on the gas.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/05/16 11:08 AM
5

Wow. I'm stressed and exhausted just reading your current situation. With respect to autism, the next step should be getting your son therapy and fast. I don't know what California laws and services are, but get engaged with your pediatrician and Childs psychologist to find the right team. Depending on "how autistic" he is, therapy may be a couple of hours of speech a week to 20+ ABA in home. Err on the side of caution and get the therapy. Your castle is in chaos man. Simplify and fix. SMV will …
/r/MarriedRedPill03/05/16 09:39 AM
1

Holy fuck this is an awesome app. Thanks!
/r/MarriedRedPill02/05/16 03:13 PM
1

It sounds like you completely lost your frame, being obsessed with her vibrator/not your dick. Next time, spooge all over her while she vibes. She'll gush buckets. It sounds though that you were butthurt about something. What did you REALLY want? Why did the vibrator bother you so bad? Did you feel rejected or invalidated? If so, own it, and kill it.
/r/MarriedRedPill30/04/16 12:29 AM
1

Every one of us, if we pull away the BS we tell ourselves, knows EXACTLY why we're in MRP. The trick is pulling away the BS and actually putting in the work. I know I need help to see the lies I've been telling myself - and hopefully I'll learn how to spot the lies I want to tell myself in the future. I like that. Be irrational. Every cold turkey quit story I've heard was having irrational will and determination.
/r/MarriedRedPill28/04/16 02:19 PM
1

Got it. Thanks for your response, good to know its not so much a character defect as it is a crutch to overcome.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/16 06:03 PM
1

Huh. Thanks. It stings, I appreciate it. Thanks for the detail.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/16 06:02 PM
1

Would you mind picking out one or two examples to show me how I'm rationalizing? What I was trying to articulate is that I'm learning and making progress, but if I'm rationalizing bad behaviors and beta thinking, I'm not seeing it - albeit I am certainly too close to myself. Thank you for investing a part of your day to help another man.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/16 12:30 PM
1

Thank you. Discipline is a habit I'm cultivating. You're right on about destructive behaviors. I also like how you picked some high value targets for me to go after. Not necessarily low hanging fruit, but something within my control.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/16 12:13 PM
1

2016 Q2 Post. My story. After reading MMSL and MAP, I understand what this section is really for. Fix my energy drains. Home My home is my castle, but my castle is shitty. It needs updates, there are little reminders everywhere of just how low quality of a house it is. I can’t sell and buy a better house right now, I don’t have the savings to execute that. That and those houses are beyond what I can afford. My own limits have me staying in this school district because it’s damn good. So what’s m…
/r/MarriedRedPill27/04/16 02:58 AM
3

Interesting. How do you view him? You essentially are seeing how the sausage is made. How is game and dread effective to give you tingles, when you know what he's doing?
/r/askMRP22/04/16 02:04 AM
3

There is no spreadsheet salvation. You lawyers always rob us engineers of our fun.
/r/MarriedRedPill22/04/16 01:50 AM
1

I'm finding that out reading leangains and ketogains, and of course, the sidebar. What I learned during my first foray into weight loss was I needed to program my consumption because my behaviors were totally erratic. The water intake was a big component, though I haven't experimented enough to say conclusively that it was the "full" feeling I got with water intake that kept my calorie count low, or that I actually had some increased metabolic rate.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/04/16 01:24 AM
1

Concur. You organize the vacation. In the long term you will be responsible anyhow. Give yourselves rest and relaxation. Then three days with the crazies and one day home to recover. Front load the benefit. And if she wants to leave early or not join you, well, that's on her.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/04/16 06:23 PM
1

Nailed it. I've been reflecting on family leadership for a while. The number one thing I can do for my children, and especially for my wife, is teach and model discipline and self-control. Time to head to the gym.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/04/16 10:09 AM
5

What kind of starfish question is this? This is MRP, where we talk about how unfuckable you are, and you need to change. If you're going to cheat. Cheat. Own it. But don't blame it on your wife because she doesn't find you fuckable. Have a downvote for the question. It promotes an atmosphere of "I'm absolved of all responsibility because AWALT". Fuck that.
/r/MarriedRedPill18/04/16 10:04 AM
1

AWALT. have an upvote
/r/askMRP18/04/16 09:49 AM
1

For this sub, it completely jives. Whether a man divorces, plates, or buckles down - it's a roadmap to follow while a man is recovering from being eviscerated. Seek the attorney, be a father that doesn't need his children's mother, do not display weakness by talking about it, and make the decision to live your life as YOU see fit. It's a little more nuanced than the reading material, but it only makes good sense. If it doesn't make it in for the reading material, it's certainly given ME somethin…
/r/askMRP18/04/16 01:24 AM
1

Second. Get a lawyer, draw up a PRE-NUP! Protect YOURSELF too. Put in writing the contract you assume when you get married. If you learn anything from married men here and from the side bar, it's don't live in covert contracts, and absolutely, clearly, make your boundaries and expectations clear. You have an opportunity here. Don't fuck it up.
/r/askMRP17/04/16 12:48 PM
1

GrampyCad right?
/r/askMRP17/04/16 11:23 AM
1

Why isn't this in the sidebar or wiki? Should be under a heading "So your slut wife cheated on your blue pill ass" Lift, read the sidebar, and do Cad's three point plan to regaining power and you doing you.
/r/askMRP17/04/16 11:22 AM
1

Second the routine and water intake perspective. Water is key in the beginning. I ended up programming my food intake by scheduling eating and drinking every half hour. Example: 6:00 - protein shake 6:30 8 oz water 7:00 Protein shake 7:30 8 oz water 8:00 breakfast 8:30 8 oz water 9:00 nuts 9:30 water You end up adjusting it as you find what works for you, but the water intake is really key. I can also say that when I got off the rigidity of the plan, I gained weight.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/04/16 02:47 AM
1

When angry, do something productive.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/04/16 03:52 PM
1

Second the AoM podcasts. Silence is golden. Can't stand pop, especially when wife and girls start singing to Taylor swift. My issue, I know. Just brings up the rage.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/04/16 06:23 PM
1

Thanks. I need a dose of reality. Good think I'm enjoying lifting and look forward to it. Resetting my expectations for the long game. Gonna get myself a good looking suit for the wedding and just enjoy the "wow you look great" comments.
/r/askMRP12/04/16 12:57 PM
1

I'm lifting now for the first time in my life, really being active at all for the first time in my life. Been doing it for about 1 year. Why do you say this is overtraining? I've worried about that, especially when my knees hurt in the evenings after doing squats and insanity.
/r/askMRP12/04/16 11:21 AM
1

Thank you for the detail. I was obese, now I'm overweight.
/r/askMRP12/04/16 11:18 AM
1

I also use this. Four scoops in a 32 oz container lasts me til dinner. Water + ON
/r/askMRP12/04/16 11:17 AM
1

This post hit the nail on the head. I thought, great, a wedding. Good time to apply dread and get some compliments. Really, I haven't made it past stage 1. In my gut I knew it was the question I wanted to ask. I think what I'll do is implement some of the fitness tracker/Keto advice and get myself a really sharp suit. I'm beginning to look good and feel good about myself. That's step one. If others notice, great, but this wedding is very much about me going and feeling good in my own skin.
/r/askMRP12/04/16 11:16 AM
1

...CAD?
/r/MarriedRedPill11/04/16 06:25 PM
5

I've heard you say this many times. It's absolutely true. The funny thing is the white knight also says let it go man, only his aim is to show that he's some tolerant enlightened femiman. The same line, "Let it go" is more about survival. And the only way to survive is take the hate, self-loathing, and anger, and turn it on yourself to become better-less lazy, stronger, more outgoing. The other part of that story is to remind yourself of awalt. No woman is worth the kind of pedestal treatment we…
/r/MarriedRedPill11/04/16 06:24 PM
3

The mission, should you choose to accept it, is to love yourself. TRP may be a sexual strategy, but it rests on the shoulders of men who have real self-worth. This is the real point of this sub. Kill my ego, find my joy again, and reframe my expectations. The funny thing is that validation seeking behaviors among men are just as unattractive as validation seeking behaviors in women (sleeping around). Every day in my journal I write, "stop being a validation whore. Love yourself. Nobody will do i…
/r/MarriedRedPill06/04/16 05:42 AM
1

It's funny that learning how to be a man follows an almost exact blueprint to alcoholics anonymous. No man is going to change unless he wants to and realizes that HE is the problem, not his addiction. And then he has to be willing to put in the work to fix himself, and not self-medicate with his addiction. I used to think I was in a mid-life crisis. Now I see myself in the middle of my life's renaissance.
/r/MarriedRedPill03/04/16 01:37 AM
2

Is No More Christian Nice Guy different from NMMNG in the side bar?
/r/MarriedRedPill27/03/16 04:35 PM
1

See, you're not that that modernity challenged. I had to look up what that was. Still SMH.
/r/MarriedRedPill27/03/16 01:25 PM
3

So much of the sidebar talks about finding make friends. I know for me, none of you are my friends, because I've never even talked to you on the phone, much less actually had a beer with you. But that doesn't take away from the real reason this sub is so important. The posts get into nitty gritty real shit fast. It took me 2 years to get up the courage to admit to my best friend that my marriage isn't all rosy. Why? Because even in that relationship, there's a power dynamic. And he said to me, "…
/r/MarriedRedPill26/03/16 11:54 AM
5

Can we put this up in the sidebar? It's reminiscent of NMMNG, but I like that it's personal, from another man fighting the good fight.
/r/MarriedRedPill24/03/16 03:18 PM
1

Or, you know, any of the books we had to read in English and college.
/r/MarriedRedPill21/03/16 12:10 PM
1

I don't need mommy's approval anymore. That's it. We judge ourselves. I just finished Athol Kay's books, and I've internalized the following: 1) Am I being an emotional vampire or victim? By seeking approval, I'm asking for validation and pulling energy from her. I don't want to be a vampire. I certainly don't want to be her oldest child. 2) If I am going to be stoic and reserved, then how can I then still get my need - my intrinsic need - to be known? I haven't quite got the answer to this, but…
/r/askMRP20/03/16 03:49 AM
2

But. Tolkein! You've got to respect the effort the put into it though. He essentially launched a new genre of fiction. And the CS Lewis-Tolkein friendship is one I think we men ought to strive for.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/03/16 08:14 PM
2

And she will never forget his old ways, she will never really believe he is a worthy leader.” And neither will he forget his old ways. She may only believe he is a worthy leader only when he judges himself to be a worthy leader.
/r/MarriedRedPill19/03/16 07:55 PM
1

How about you be the harshly honest man with yourself. You don't respect yourself. How will she? Read nmmng, create a MAP, and post in OYS weekly. You aren't planning your life, preparing, or steering your ship. You have the benefit of knowing what behavior ticks you off. Set the boundary. She may say, quit being a crybaby. That's where you need to figure out if you really are being a child or if her behavior is genuinely disrespectful. Then you enforce consequences. Ever work for a boss who was…
/r/askMRP15/03/16 10:54 AM
1

Despite your n count, you are about to make a commitment for life. You mention children. What sort of model to expect to set for them? Your biggest covert contract is "I had sex with hundreds of girls so I should be ok with my FUTURE wife wanting to have sex too." Every single comment about her is spot on. But let's dig in to you. You may think you're a high value man cause you fucked some bitches. Your post screams to me that you loathe yourself. Do you? How deep have you dug to get to a place …
/r/MarriedRedPill13/03/16 01:02 PM
4

Whew. Gotta tell you I needed that encouragement. Not really in the mood to go home to my OWN house and deal with a bitchy wife. But that's our lot in this life isn't it? Work, toil, and sweat.
/r/askMRP11/03/16 07:34 PM
1

I look forward to your continued success. Keep this in the forefront of your mind - you ARE doing God's work. If you have led one man away from the life of quiet desperation, you have done well. I know that your kindness in the depths of my own despair was what I needed. I can only hope to pay it forward. Keep it up, show us how you do it, so that we can use that as fuel to mentor other men. Bravo Zulu.
/r/MarriedRedPill02/03/16 01:48 AM
15

"Everything in this world is about sex. Except sex. Sex is about power."
/r/MarriedRedPill23/02/16 10:48 PM
1

I did. I had read it weeks ago as I was devouring the intro material. Your comment reminded me that I needed to go back to it. What I was hoping to get out of this comment was advice on how to tactically handle anger as it comes up - which for me comes up when I read. The answer is in the original link. Do something productive
/r/askMRP22/02/16 01:29 AM
4

I appreciate that. I can deal and process anger, but it usually takes me some time to get through it - typically with some CBT methods. That anger usually gets refocused on asserting myself with myself - I am the prize. I am a high value man. Thanks Jack.
/r/askMRP20/02/16 12:21 PM
2

Initiating after bad behavior could reinforce bad behavior. Suddenly, youcould find yourself fucking her brains out after every time she shit tests you. And if you don't cause you really don't want to fuck after one of those, what will her response be? We're all pavlov's dogs after all.
/r/askMRP19/02/16 03:25 PM
2

Yep. Especially when it's tied up into a knot and she gives you the ILYBINILWY (I love you but I'm not in love you with you) BS.
/r/MarriedRedPill17/02/16 01:07 AM
1

Jack Donovan in "The Way of Men" advocates a return to tribalism as the only effective means to return men to who we were meant to be. But in the absence of fighting the neighboring township for food, the only thing left to do is fake it til you make it. Hunt (rifle, bow and arrow, shooting range) but without the primal need to hunt. Fight (MMA, boxing, martial arts) but without the primal need to fight. There's a difference between being a good man, and being good at being a man. What we did in…
/r/MarriedRedPill17/02/16 12:04 AM
1

I didn't know Rollo doesn't respond, but the reply was in general for all MRPers. Rollo's writing makes me navel gaze, and I've found I need to write down what's going on in my head in order to process it. If I need to do it, I bet others probably do to.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/02/16 12:18 PM
2

To the point my wife said to me, the world is moving to hermaphradism. I said, nope, our brains are too big and we like sex too much. In the context of marriage, how then, do we upset the apple cart? In reality, if I was out there fighting every day for food, survival, and tribe, my wife would have no such notion. But we've gone soft in the modern day. My only option is to assert my dominance to which my wife responds with femininity and shit tests. I have to be the AMOG. I have to BE the man wi…
/r/MarriedRedPill16/02/16 12:28 AM
2

Also WISNIFG. Both go together like... wait for it... love and marriage.
/r/MarriedRedPill16/02/16 12:14 AM
0

Men have created this unfair society over the last three generations by not holding anyone accountable, ourselves included - and now the cuck has come to roost. As we awaken from our long slumber (love your youtube channel), we slowly start to change our spheres of influence. The sad state of affairs is that it will take far longer to course correct our society than it did to fall off the wagon. It may even take a civil war for that to happen - but there are conservative communities that hold th…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/02/16 11:29 PM
2

Owning my shit is amoral, scary, liberating, and ultimately, masculine.
/r/MarriedRedPill13/02/16 03:18 PM
1

Instead of serving the establishment (monotheism, patriarchal energies), the modern tautophrase empowers the individual. Regardless of how shallow that individual is. http://www.nytimes.com/2015/04/05/magazine/how-you-do-you-perfectly-captures-our-narcissistic-culture.html?_r=0 I too have seen “You do you” tossed around. It never tasted right to me. Like the bitter red pill was coated in a thick layer of sweet poison. I came here because MRP offered me a glimpse of becoming the Patriarch of my f…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/02/16 02:16 PM
3

It sickens me to think that I used to be in a relationship with her. Your post struck a chord in me. In years past I would be with you - agreeing that the woman is a complete gold-digging whore. But that reaction comes from fear - fear that I’m not the man I know in my gut I yearn to be, and so I project that fear to my woman - that she has to stay loyal to me at all times irrespective of my behaviors even in death. Does that sound rational? What sickens me is the man lived the life of quiet des…
/r/MarriedRedPill13/02/16 01:57 PM
4

I cannot agree more. This group of men capture the essence of manhood and give us the fathers and brothers we wish we had. My wife took a picture of me while I wasn't looking and posted on her facebook. Caption: My "boyfriend" is so hot. I looked at that picture and thought, damn, when did I get skinny? But you know what's the most liberating feeling in the world? Not feeling like a coward anymore. Bravo Zulu brother, keep it up, and keep feeding us too.
/r/MarriedRedPill12/02/16 09:50 AM
6

We didn't watch the superbowl for the first time in 22 years. And I didn't even miss it. Instead, I prepared for the next day. Laid out my clothes, went through my mental reps for the gym, internalized my to do list for the week, spent some time working on my business, read some MRP sidebar material, and spent some quality time with my kids. That's the teaching moment.
/r/MarriedRedPill08/02/16 10:38 AM
1

She tells me that she's sorry but there is no way she can go against her guru's teachings and that she understands my high libido and I could check out of the relationship if I want. If she doesn't want you as much as you want her, the balance of power is no longer in your favor. If you choose to marry her, it will be on her terms. Though you may have strong feelings of "love", this will always hang over your head. Blue Pill me would have married her and thought I got lucky. Red Pill me would at…
/r/MarriedRedPill07/02/16 11:23 AM
1

I too am obsessed with Leadership. I was never military, but I've worked in the military sphere my entire professional life - first with the Army, then Marines, and now the Navy. A turning point for me - a sort of wake up call to leadership - was The Rickover Effect. Reflecting on this post, Rickover exhibited extreme ownership to the point that his organization is STILL performing at a high level nearly 70 years after he began. "Responsibility is a unique concept... You may share it with others…
/r/MarriedRedPill04/02/16 02:23 AM
1

I will offer Deflection/Distraction, and amusement to the best of my understanding. I’m still unplugging so if anything I say here sounds non-TRP, it’s because I too am still learning. I’ll rely on the moderators to...moderate my answer. First, I agree. Hormones don't excuse bad behavior. There are still consequences. We "know" the consequence to bad behavior is lack of attention. However, pregnancy is an extenuating circumstance because you recognize her pregnancy limits her impulse control. So…
/r/MarriedRedPill03/02/16 01:20 AM
1

The other stuff a man can find out there in self-help without every coming to red pill. But this issue is the heart of why I'm here. To understand her, me, our relationship, and ultimately, to adjust my expectations to something more healthy, realistic, and something I can live with.
/r/MarriedRedPill31/01/16 09:34 PM
1

I don't really enjoy caveman sex. And she'll pick up on it when I try. I know she likes it, but I just have a hard time getting into it. I think in the back of my mind, my wife, who I love, can't possibly be this sexual being. I didn't marry her for that. It brings into sharp contrast her sexual nature vs. what I thought was her "good" nature. Totally kills the romantic view I had of her.
/r/MarriedRedPill31/01/16 09:31 PM
1

Shit I Own Organization This is month 8 of my organized life. I write daily in my journal, track my behaviors, workouts, and nutrition. This is the most organized I’ve ever been in my life and it feels great. Financial I’m managing my finances and implementing The Total Money Makeover. I’m sticking to my budget, and am well on my way to being debt free by the time my eldest goes to college. Self Development I’ve always been one to improve myself, but I have kicked it up several notches this past…
/r/MarriedRedPill30/01/16 02:20 AM
2

Great post and series. I immediately latched onto this post as instructional. I'd also like to see this in the sidebar to return to later. I DO think this sub can help with emotional frame, especially as those of us that are unplugging post our thoughts and experiences. Other men speaking truth changes perspective. Yes, fundamentally, I have to be open to truth - but I would argue that's why I'm here. I may be too blind trying to hide my own fears. But you all can see through my bullshit and sel…
/r/MarriedRedPill21/01/16 10:23 PM
1

Are you Indian? Something about the indian culture seems to completely make males bluepill weaksauces. I reflect back and realize my dad was so weak, it's a wonder I ever snapped out of bluepill. http://www.returnofkings.com/3648/taking-the-red-pill-destroyed-my-family Whatever your background, you are first, a man. Frame. Control. Dominance. You can do this
/r/MarriedRedPill21/01/16 11:31 AM
1

Chat, but yes. Apparently I'm an ego-driven bitch who shuts down attempts at sex if it's not his way. I didn't sleep all night, and now we're both probably in shitty moods. #firstworldproblems
/r/MarriedRedPill20/01/16 11:37 AM
2

Fuck. Instantly takes me back to a bluepill fight we had month ago. Her: You think you're the only one with insecurities? You and your porn addiction devastated me as a wife and a woman. Grow the fuck up. More truth.
/r/MarriedRedPill20/01/16 08:37 AM
1

Agreed. I too believe this was fantasy more than desire to have one. Is this another gender difference? Men act to realize their fantasies. Women fantasize to ... feel depraved?
/r/MarriedRedPill20/01/16 06:49 AM
1

Periodically. I'm doing this right now with a reddit only account in incognito mode. Maybe I'll just write it down in my journal and begin to look at it objectively. Definitely getting the books and reading through all the posts.
/r/askMRP14/01/16 01:48 PM
1

There's a lot, and even on reddit, not sure I want to be that open. Not ready for fallout if wife finds it. That's why I was asking to see if there's a more private way I can work through this.
/r/askMRP14/01/16 12:51 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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