| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 624 | Forgot my makeup bag at my boyfriend’s place and I get this response. We’ve been dating for 4 months. Definitely ended things with him. *shrug* | RED FLAG 🚨 | WinterDoughnut | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/06/20 03:08 PM |
| 346 | When men withhold feelings/emotions: do they have them or do they just not care? | RED FLAG 🚨 | WinterDoughnut | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/21 08:13 PM |
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 159 | A decent strategy guide to land a man /sHave we all dated the same man 🫣 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/04/22 05:32 PM |
| 97 | If it’s one thing men are good at, it’s low blows.EXACTLY. Can’t with these men anymore | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/03/22 05:06 PM |
| 127 | Update: Had a HV Date Experience. I will continue to vet but how when we won’t see each other for a couple months?Take a breath and step back. He hasn’t earned the HV label. It’s been two dates. HVMs are consistent over time and pursue you. I’ve been in your shoes before and gotten WAY too emotionally involved in the beginning. Just try to spend some time away from your phone, focus on yourself and meditate so you’re not thinking about this guy 24/7. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/03/22 03:25 PM |
| 10 | Scrote keeps on contacting me.Wow. He’s a horrible person. I’ve dealt with someone similar who texts every four months or so and I just block the new numbers without giving any response. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/03/22 08:00 PM |
| 56 | NVM is caught watching porn. Fiancée calls the wedding off and he’s worried about not getting the deposit back. Scrotes and pickmes come to his defense 🤡They really are all the same 😴 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/03/22 02:33 AM |
| 6 | “Relationships are a mirror” - BS 🤡Yes. I remember leaving interactions with my friends feeling lighter and happy, versus interactions with the LV ex leaving me in a pool of tears and insecurities. It was hard for me to understand why I only felt this way with him. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/02/22 09:20 PM |
| 22 | Men share their stories of when they treated women the worst.🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/02/22 11:42 PM |
| 122 | Fresh Take: Men Who Rush For Sex🤯🤯🤯 I honestly always turned it on myself as “maybe I don’t have anything to offer and that’s why they’re only interested in sex?” While twisting myself into a pretzel trying to be an expert in everything these men proclaimed to like. Thanks for the enlightenment 🙏 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/02/22 01:17 AM |
| 49 | In the Spirit of Valentine's Day..Love that you told him to leave for the night 😂😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/01/22 09:46 PM |
| 97 | Pretend you can't cookYeah I go full out and don’t do it at all! 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/01/22 09:51 PM |
| 27 | Trust your feelings and the strategyThis is perfect. I want to get to the point where my mindset and actions follow this sentiment 🙌 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/01/22 09:21 PM |
| 13 | Do you talk to your therapist about FDS?I’m so sorry you’ve experienced this. I hope you’re able to find a better therapist with a better understanding of chronic illnesses. I’m sitting here in disbelief of this therapist’s future faking… so unprofessional. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/01/22 05:30 AM |
| 69 | Hmmm, Am I Crazy or Are Women Wising Up?I feel so much freedom now. Freedom from the pressure of getting married or even having a boyfriend. Pre-pandemic me wouldn’t have recognized me. Lol | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/01/22 01:06 AM |
| 161 | This is what we mean when we say don't go 50/50. You'll be doing 100% of the childrearing while he's at work and he will expect you to give up your savings as well.Dying at “stupid DNA legacy” 👌 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/01/22 01:32 AM |
| 3 | How to not get anxious before dates?I walk in expecting the absolute worst and I don’t get nervous for that reason. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/01/22 08:02 PM |
| 23 | Apparently his wife is TA for kicking him out of his own houseLol praying this is the case! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/01/22 03:31 AM |
| 181 | Apparently his wife is TA for kicking him out of his own houseHe finishes work early and just sits around until he feels it’s time to go home? Does this man not have hobbies or ways to entertain himself? Sounds like he’s probably overbearing at home when he’s not busy with work. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/01/22 01:25 AM |
| 80 | Tell the world you abuse women without telling the world you abuse women 🤫🤭Right? Is that a… threat? Lol sounds like women are the winners in this scenario. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/12/21 01:39 AM |
| 265 | Normalize telling men they don’t turn you on anymoreI actually did say this to my ex. He would be so hot and cold in in our relationship, and after one of these “cold” cycles he called me up and wanted to see me. I said I wasn’t turned on by him and didn’t feel like seeing him. He responded with “That’s a mean thing to say.” 🤣 No, it wasn’t mean. It was the truth and I wasn’t playing games with you little man. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/12/21 06:06 PM |
| 9 | He found me.He’s a user and an abuser. Silence is your strongest weapon here. Get away from this emotionally abusive person. That’s the only role he knows how to play. You never had the power to make him a better or worse man. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/11/21 05:23 PM |
| 11 | I experienced a switcheroo by a soft boy who ended up extorting my emotional investmentOoh I would love to see a post elaborating more on this! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/11/21 06:57 PM |
| 8 | The Female Dating Strategy Podcast: EP. 35 - The Queens Are Off to Baggage Reclaim with Natalie Lue!I love her! So excited to listen to this! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/11/21 03:48 AM |
| 6 | Instead of focusing on your feelings of hurt and betrayal from a cheating partner, focus on how cheating demonstrates how weak, boring and unattractive your partner is.👏👏👏 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/10/21 06:05 PM |
| 3 | Get a female therapist, not a male oneThis is a great point to bring up. Bad therapy can really mess someone up. When speaking about abuse, women who are living with or in contact with their abuser are still brainwashed to think like their abuser. Until they get distance from the abuser, therapy can only be used to manage the situation and help her cope. So it becomes her responsibility to "better" herself and assuage her abuser... while he changes nothing. Therapy is only helpful when people are in the right context to work on them… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/10/21 05:55 PM |
| 5 | Get a female therapist, not a male oneI dated a psychologist who cheated, lied, and gaslit me. None of us are perfect, but I feel like if you're responsible for healing people or walking them through hard times you shouldn't be leading a double life. And you shouldn't be making the lives of the people in your personal life worse everyday. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/10/21 05:47 PM |
| 28 | My HV bf drove 4 hours round-trip to pick me up because I *might* be uncomfortableOmg this is the best. Thanks for posting and giving us hope. On days I would fly back home from visiting family, my ex would ask me what time my flight gets in. I would tell him. His response? “Ok cool! See you when you’re settled in?” No offer to pick me up. He lives 15 minutes from the airport. He’s the worst. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/10/21 03:52 AM |
| 2 | The straw that broke the camels back for me, and what has turned me angry and bitter against men is not only the abuse they've subjected me to, but the fact that I'm 28 years old and no man has never even gifted me a bouquet.I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I understand so much what it’s like to be in an empty relationship continually giving more and more and not getting anything in return. Feel free to PM me if you want to talk! You’re gonna get through this!! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/10/21 04:23 PM |
| 68 | The straw that broke the camels back for me, and what has turned me angry and bitter against men is not only the abuse they've subjected me to, but the fact that I'm 28 years old and no man has never even gifted me a bouquet.Oh he for sure hated me! I left that relationship knowing he’s angry at women and I was just another one in line that accepted low effort, no emotional connection and even cheating at one point. Again it really is not about the money or entitlement, but when my friends treat me better than my BF there is no point in having a BF lol. So glad to be done with the stress of that relationship!! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/10/21 08:38 AM |
| 43 | How to Get Over a Breakup. Are You Loving Yourself the Way You Loved Your Ex?Your point about how if he asked for or needed something you’d have done it yesterday… it’s so true. So many women put effort into their significant other that sadly never gets reciprocated. Let’s do right by our own needs 👏👏👏 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/10/21 03:43 AM |
| 578 | The straw that broke the camels back for me, and what has turned me angry and bitter against men is not only the abuse they've subjected me to, but the fact that I'm 28 years old and no man has never even gifted me a bouquet.I dated a man who makes 100k+ a year. He never bought me flowers — for a birthday or Valentine’s. I told him I loved flowers so it’s not like he didn’t know. When men show you they’re not generous with their time, attention and money it should be an instant red flag. It’s not about the money — it’s about the thought. I know my ex is not an idiot so that must mean he was intentionally withholding with everything. It was hard to accept someone cared so little. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/10/21 03:25 AM |
| 1 | Need recommendations for understanding psychology/behavioursHow He Gets Into Her Head: The Mind of the Male Intimate Abuser | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/09/21 03:24 AM |
| 60 | This really backs up the study on a majority of men leaving/cheating on their terminally ill wives. 🙄Not surprised at ALL by this. Sad. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/09/21 10:05 PM |
| 74 | What was your moment of clarity?Dude could not say the words “I care about you.” To me it’s so easy to say that to my friends, and especially to someone I’ve been dating for a while. But he couldn’t do it. Made me feel worthless. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/09/21 07:10 PM |
| 10 | I highly recommend this book for those of you who struggle with infatuation, codependency or feeling ‘addicted’ to someone. It goes into the neuroscience of limerence (romantic obsession) and how to get rid of it.Wow, perfect timing. I've dealt with someone who literally cannot express their feelings for me. It's so hurtful. But makes me want them more and do the whole dance of... can I do enough / be enough to get them to share words of affirmation? Ugh | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/21 08:18 PM |
| 65 | Okay so ik I already made a post about something similar but I came across ANOTHER post of Facebook (this must be where all the LVM and pickmes are) that proves my point of men wanting to use women and normalize it. I’m showing proof because scrotes were in my messages acting stupid.I’m tired just watching this nonsense | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/08/21 10:44 PM |
| 15 | Withholding as a Form of AbuseOne time I brought up an issue to my ex and his response was “I need some time to think about it.” Uhm?? And when would that be?? One week later he calls me and doesn’t even bring up the issue. I have to remind him we still haven’t talked about my concerns “oH W’eRe TaLkiNg aBoUt ThAt NoWW?” 🤦🏽♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/08/21 11:46 PM |
| 60 | Reminder for ladies to keep vetting in a relationshipSis 💀 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/08/21 11:16 PM |
| 12 | Women choose to reduce their quality of life to let a man go raw and I‘m tired of itNot dating anyone right now but progestin-only birth control did reduce my monthly period related migraines. I got off of it and now they’re back. Does anyone else experience migraines around their period?? I don’t want to go back on BC but migraines are the devil :( | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/07/21 06:45 PM |
| 5 | When did it “click” for you that’s what posted here/the principles were helping/helped you? Let’s start a list for others…That is so insightful! My mind is blown right now. I always wondered why I would feel so tired/depressed the next day after seeing my ex, it's just an outpouring of energy from our end for no reason. They'll never value what we give. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/21 08:06 PM |
| 20 | When did it “click” for you that’s what posted here/the principles were helping/helped you? Let’s start a list for others…I’m so happy for you and that you’re redirecting that energy from him to yourself. ✨❤️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/07/21 05:06 AM |
| 42 | "You earned my respect by not sleeping with me, actually", said the man who tried to relationship-fake me into banging himMen are so predictable and boring. Dating is not even fun anymore. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/07/21 08:05 PM |
| 17 | It really boils down to character- most men fail. Stop praising basic stuffYes. My ex was a psychologist with all the above yet he has the worst character and probably has some sort of mental disorder. It was the most confusing and terrible relationship of my life. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/07/21 03:23 PM |
| 18 | I will not be a detectiveSo proud of you. You’re strong and the “loss” of this man is actually a gain that will pay dividends in the future. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/04/21 06:29 AM |
| 14 | This is what male entitlement looks like. In response to WhY DoN't YoU WoMeN JuSt CoMmUnIcAtE MoRe. Men don't freaking listen.One day I might type all the BS this one man put me through because I was a 🤡 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/03/21 08:59 PM |
| 159 | This is what male entitlement looks like. In response to WhY DoN't YoU WoMeN JuSt CoMmUnIcAtE MoRe. Men don't freaking listen.Told my ex all the time I like flowers. One year into knowing him (after a breakup in between) i finally get fed up after telling him TWICE before Valentine’s that I wanted flowers. I basically tell him in an annoyed tone that I can’t be with someone who doesn’t listen to me and isn’t romantic. “Wow, you get so aggressive!” 🙄 Before I met him up for our next date he texted me saying he didn’t have time to get flowers that day but that he wOuLD “later this week.” Too bad he was too shady for us t… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/03/21 02:36 PM |
| 5 | What should be the dating strategy for child free women?This was basically my last relationship. Why are men so predictable? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/03/21 04:53 AM |
| 5 | “Flowers are impractical and expensive”, my ex said. He was not a flower guy and I thought I could accept itI love this analysis 👏👏👏 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/03/21 04:20 AM |
| 11 | What’s the most important thing you’ve learned since discovering FDS?This hit so close to home. One day I found boxes of stuff in the living room and had to pry out of my dad what was happening?? The woman he cheated on my mom with was moving in a couple months after the divorce and he didn’t think to mention it. Just surprised me with it. Trash. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/02/21 02:36 AM |
| 1 | I don't think I want to get married anymoreYep. Dating = being irritated by a man 90% of the time while sticking around for the 10% that is good-ish. NO MORE | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/02/21 05:38 AM |
| 10 | And to think, I thought he'd actually respect my boundaries when I told him not to contact me again.This dude who HAS A GIRLFRIEND kept messaging me. I blocked him. He found me on WhatsApp. Blocked him there. Started looking at my insta stories. Blocked him there. He is literally a cockroach after a nuclear bomb | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/12/20 07:27 PM |
| 3 | Stop over explaining yourself. LVM don’t care about your feelings, and nothing you can say will change that.YES! When my ex sent me a text recently, I couldn’t muster the energy to respond. I just don’t care and I know he can’t add anything to my life. Like you said, I felt gross even THINKING about responding because all I could think about were his disrespectful actions in the past. Someone eventually has to stop the flow of conversation if they’re not worthy. Might as well leave them on read instead of the other way around. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/12/20 05:04 AM |
| 32 | One scroll down this advice sub and it's raining LVMs. These headings were all within an hour or so of each other 🤦🏻♀️If anything a man does could be the title of a Reddit relationship advice post, it’s a sign he needs to go | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/12/20 04:12 AM |
| 12 | Reminder that it's ok to not be ok. Feelings your feelings/Missing someone is not wrong and is totally valid. Just be sure that you're not letting yourself fall into toxic situations again, because you're in a bad place temporarily. If you need support, we got you!Also here if you need someone to talk to! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/12/20 03:58 AM |
| 5 | Weekly FDS Chat, Check-In, Quick Questions Answered November 9 2020We’ve all been there! Just know that it’s normal to feel shitty and to FEEL in general. It’s a good thing. Now you have a better understanding of what you want in a partner and what you won’t tolerate. Proud of you for ending things as hard as it may have been! Reading Natasha Adamo’s blog post on keeping your head up and standards high might help you through this time! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/11/20 05:11 PM |
| 20 | I ghosted him, he sends this 🤡Lol thanks for the laugh dude. Have fun with your “regulars” - they sound super real and not made up! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/10/20 10:44 PM |
| 45 | The most empowering takeaway from FDS is "you don't have to put up with this"You are so right about the fact that they realize the power they have over you because of your innate desire to be a people pleaser. They know how to control someone like this and push you even more over time because they don’t respect you. The only people they respect are those who have boundaries, but even then they’ll end up draining those relationships eventually as well. There’s no winning with these bros. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/10/20 11:29 AM |
| 3 | Story of my 1 year life transformation thanks to all of you amazing ladiesLove to read stuff like this!! So proud that you chose option 2 even though it was probably a very hard choice. My shitty ex made me feel so dumb and like I would ever be good enough. In his tone, his comments, and his demeanor. He was in law school while we were dating, and I felt like I couldn’t measure up to him or his friends even though I had a degree and a career. And the only one with the money to come see him in a long distance relationship.. Now he still doesn’t have a job one year afte… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/09/20 02:13 PM |
| 10 | The longer I stay away from dating, the harder it is to imagine wanting to go back..Same. I feel like I’m finally understanding what self-love is and not worried at all about when “the love of my life” is going to appear so I can get my “life started.” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/09/20 02:39 AM |
| 2 | I broke up with him after 6 years. I'm in pain but I know it will pass.So proud of you. I know it’s hard to envision this now, but there will be someone out there who will do all the basic things AND more for you that this dude can only manage to talk about without follow-through. Stay strong!!! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/08/20 07:16 PM |
| 15 | Imagine....WTF! I had the same issue with him not opening Instagram messages? Like what’s up with that? Why? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/08/20 06:05 PM |
| 15 | How Old Were You When You Learned the Bad Men Weren't an Extreme Minority?It makes me a little sad that I’ll never get that excited again about meeting someone for the first time, or getting asked out for a second date. Or all the things that happen in the initial dating stages. The butterflies are gone. But I’m very happy I’m smarter now and won’t ever let a man make me feel shitty. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/08/20 01:46 AM |
| 2 | Filled with resentmentDealing with resentment for me ultimately was about really KNOWING that I was not an all powerful being that induced these actions in men. I am not a magician, I can’t get someone who is great and kind to suddenly become a terrible, hurtful person. They were bad all along. Two books that helped me a lot are Psychopath Free and Whole Again by Jason Mackenzie. Remember that you already did the hard thing - YOU LEFT!! So be proud that you’re safe and away from the person most likely to hurt you. Yo… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/08/20 06:33 PM |
| 5 | Beware of LVM/Scrotes in therapy!Curious what feminist books you’d recommend? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/07/20 12:43 AM |
| 4 | FDS Podcast?Yes! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/07/20 11:49 PM |
| 3 | FDS Podcast?I love this idea! I’d be game to brainstorm :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/07/20 10:50 PM |
| 11 | I deserve to maintain my dignity.“The man knows he can’t operate on your level and give you what he knows you demand and deserve.” This got to me. Thanks for sharing 🙏 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/07/20 02:55 PM |
| 120 | A HVM will find your standards and boundaries attractiveI love this. A good relationship never involves mental gymnastics to justify being treated as less than or deciphering text messages. Thanks for sharing this story - it lifted my spirits! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/06/20 11:45 PM |
| 6 | This man is a joke, and gross, and I don't know why I'm wasting my time explaining things to him.Wow I am dying this is so gross | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/06/20 06:18 PM |
| 2 | I’m gonna nah sis myself for a second.I’ve done this before, too. It’s okay, you’re human, and it can be lonely to be in a vulnerable situation like that. Hope you’re feeling better! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/06/20 05:52 AM |
| 1 | Forgot my makeup bag at my boyfriend’s place and I get this response. We’ve been dating for 4 months. Definitely ended things with him. *shrug*Ha yes, I am living in PDX. Trying to stay optimistic about dating because I want this to be my forever home :) but online dating is rough! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/06/20 01:13 AM |
| 2 | Forgot my makeup bag at my boyfriend’s place and I get this response. We’ve been dating for 4 months. Definitely ended things with him. *shrug*We texted back and forth a bit and I said I wanted to meet up so we can clear up any misunderstandings that happened over text. He came over (with all my stuff lol) and I asked him what was going on. He said he didn’t think it was a big deal, and that he was only stating he did not like having things at his place, and that we should still see each other this weekend. I kept pushing and asked him why it bothered him so much. He said I was putting words in his mouth, that he “didn’t like it” not t… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/06/20 08:38 PM |
| 14 | Forgot my makeup bag at my boyfriend’s place and I get this response. We’ve been dating for 4 months. Definitely ended things with him. *shrug*We texted back and forth a bit and I said I wanted to meet up so we can clear up any misunderstandings that happened over text. He came over (with all my stuff lol) and I asked him what was going on. He said he didn’t think it was a big deal, and that he was only stating he did not like having things at his place, and that we should still see each other this weekend. I kept pushing and asked him why it bothered him so much. He said I was putting words in his mouth, that he “didn’t like it” not t… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/06/20 06:13 PM |
| 226 | Forgot my makeup bag at my boyfriend’s place and I get this response. We’ve been dating for 4 months. Definitely ended things with him. *shrug*I will be more wise next time around! At least I only lost four months instead of years like past me would have done. Love this community and the empowerment that it brings | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/06/20 03:58 PM |
| 398 | Forgot my makeup bag at my boyfriend’s place and I get this response. We’ve been dating for 4 months. Definitely ended things with him. *shrug*He was very nice, sweet and thoughtful in the beginning. But there was a point within 3 weeks of knowing each other that he went 5 days without texting me and I should have ended things there. No one waits that long to reach out if they like you enough. After that he spoke a lot about a future together but his actions didn’t really match. I usually try to twist anything that feels off as me being sensitive, but I know in this instance I’m not overreacting. I was actually under-reacting through o… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/06/20 03:46 PM |
| 162 | Forgot my makeup bag at my boyfriend’s place and I get this response. We’ve been dating for 4 months. Definitely ended things with him. *shrug*I don’t understand either! Best part is that he works as a psychologist. double shrug | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/06/20 03:38 PM |
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