~ archived since 2018 ~
~ archived since 2018 ~
| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
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| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Looking for a quick gut check and opinionsIts my one hard and fast rule. Don't remarry a single mom if the kid/kids are minors. Shit a lot of women use their husbands to begin with. But with single moms literally any guy with a job is better than them being single. The risk is way too high that you're gonna get used and they'll dump you once the kids graduate. I've seen it happen. | /r/Divorce_Men | 29/02/24 05:28 PM |
| 1 | Don't Ever Look BackDid she initiate it? | /r/Divorce_Men | 28/02/24 09:50 PM |
| 9 | How do you deal with cheating ex- (apparent) success ?There was a study that women reported doing better than men after divorce. My response to that is...no shit. Doesn't take a genius to figure out the one who made out like a bandit is doing better than the one stuck with the bill (figurative or literal). This isn't a game. Divorce ruins lives. It sucks that some just get off scott free from it. It sucks that your wife wont ever have a reckoning for what she did to you, or the time she took from you. But that's life. The best we can hope for is th… | /r/Divorce_Men | 23/02/24 10:18 PM |
| 15 | In Retrospect, What Should Guys Screen for in a Partner Before Entering a Relationship?Statistically? I'm not sure you can. Like if we're having this conversation in a stadium of guys. As a man, try not to lose a job.... that increases divorces. Hope your wife doesn't get a friend that is divorced. That increases your chance of divorce by 70%. Hope she doesn't get bored I guess? I mean lesbian marriages have the highest divorce rates and in hetero marriages we all know here they initiate divorce the vast majority of the time. Going back to our thought experiment of talking about t… | /r/Divorce_Men | 22/02/24 02:11 AM |
| 8 | How you guys fucked up in your marriages?"In short, was totally used" You're not alone. My ex was in it for a greencard. Left a few weeks after she got it. If it matters...we first met in person and were friends for about a year then things got more serious. wasnt like a mail-order bride thing. And I went to a therapist and he told me... your story almost to a tee about dozens of male clients he had had. That in the pantheon of used men I wouldn't even make the highlights lol. I work with a guys who's mom remarried a guy, 14 year marri… | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/02/24 09:08 PM |
| 2 | Don’t mind being alone but I hate being lonely. My wife left meAnd if you had had more hobbies or a busier work schedule or whatever, she would've hit you with the "you didn't make me a priority and fight for our marriage, so I had to have sex with another guy". Whatever they can get to stick to the wall to justify the reason. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/02/24 07:29 PM |
| 18 | Don’t mind being alone but I hate being lonely. My wife left me'She's the most beautiful and loving and real person I have ever known" How about no. She sounds like a cruel asshole to be honest. Youll realize this in time. Here's the thing my man. She doesn't give a shit what happens to you now. Or your sadness. It's possible she never did. She wants the divorce? Cool. Give it to her and never look back. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/02/24 04:14 AM |
| 2 | Will she ever regret or have any remorse for what she did?And in what can only be described as an absurdity so weird but somehow is still true....If the other woman finds out and dumps him, he will then become less desirable to OPs ex. | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/02/24 02:33 AM |
| 4 | Watching your wife go from your partner to your adversary is one of the most insane things I can imagineWell if it's any consolation the next guy won't be her "forever soul mate' either. Even if she faces the music that she's getting older and stays with him. She'll get bored of him too. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/02/24 06:00 AM |
| 3 | Watching your wife go from your partner to your adversary is one of the most insane things I can imagine50 years? Ain't nobody want to be around 50 years from now.😉 I'm ok with self-determination....if I'm still poor at 60 I'm checking out. I just think 30 (with a kid) is still young. Plus mentally it's like torture thinking you have to stick around for 5 decades. I don't even want to do that. Maybe set a goal until your boy is an adult. Then...reassess if you need to. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/02/24 03:31 AM |
| 14 | Watching your wife go from your partner to your adversary is one of the most insane things I can imagineWomen know...years and years in advance they're going to leave. It's the dirty secret of marriage. 10 year marriage the wife ends? Congrats, she knew in year 4. Hell some knew the entire time. Women talk about this to each other all the time. Like how men talk about hunting or the Super Bowl. They'll casually mention to their girlfriends about leaving the husband 3 or 5 or 8 years in the future when the kid hits a certain age, or a certain amount of the house gets paid off , or they qualify for … | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/02/24 03:26 AM |
| 8 | Watching your wife go from your partner to your adversary is one of the most insane things I can imaginePump the brakes my brother about things not getting better! A month is super fresh. I tried to kill myself and spent a week in a psychiatric hospital like 7 months post seperation (for the record it wasn't an attempt to "win her back" or anything, as far as I know she never found out). You got a kid. Got to give it a few years. It will get better. I promise. | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/02/24 03:12 AM |
| 9 | Watching your wife go from your partner to your adversary is one of the most insane things I can imagineDamn 2 year blues today. This is the 2nd comment I've seen today about the 2 year mark. I was still a mess until like...year 4. That's not to discourage anyone making them think it will take that long. It usually doesn't. But it can. I read an article (and for the life of me can't find it again). That it can take 5 years post divorce for some people to recover. So that could be upwards of 6 years since seperation. We say "this ruined my life " for a reason. Not "oh my divorce was a mild inconven… | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/02/24 03:09 AM |
| 1 | Watching your wife go from your partner to your adversary is one of the most insane things I can imagineHow long ago did you guys seperate? | /r/Divorce_Men | 17/02/24 03:04 AM |
| 3 | Two Years Out from the Separation Date" the beginning of the end" 8 years isnt the end. be grateful she didn't wait another decade to do it. But sometimes it's good to commiserate. I hear you. As do other guys on here. I wouldn't be concerned if you're still going through it and you feel she's not even aware of the date like you have been the last few weeks. I'll die on the hill that women know in say year 3 or 4, then wait another 4 or 5 years to leave when it's convenient/all their ducks are in a row. Sounds like what happened her… | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/02/24 09:49 PM |
| 17 | Got cheated on, feel like a simp.They both left their SOs to be with each other? Hahaha. Bro give it time, that's gonna explode. Oddly enough , more from the guy doing it. Women(like you said) will branch swing and its whatever, they won't get "karma" from it. But both? It'll get ugly. | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/02/24 09:40 PM |
| 1 | Ex wife is mean towards meDid She ask for the divorce after she got the greencard? | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/02/24 03:57 AM |
| 3 | Divorce is done, lesson learned. Moving forward, how do I protect myself such a house, cars, assets in the future?Yeah I can see OP maybe wanting to live with/have an ltr with a woman again. But kids ? You're absolutely boned if/when she gets bored of you. No llc or trust will protect you from that. | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/02/24 04:42 AM |
| 2 | Divorce is done, lesson learned. Moving forward, how do I protect myself such a house, cars, assets in the future?Schrodingers woman. I speak Spanish and portuguese and have spent time in Brazil and guatemala and Mexico. The women who are loyal and genuinely love their husbands? They marry dudes there and live good lives...in those countries. Brazilian and Guatemalan Women who come/want to come to the states? Most money hungry biatches on planet earth. They talk insane shit about the gringo guys they marry and leave them high and dry once that permanent resident card shows up in the mail. And not just gring… | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/02/24 04:34 AM |
| 4 | Will i ever be a normal person again?There's a reason we say divorce ruins lives. Not "oh, my divorce mildly inconvenienced me". Don't worry about living with your parents. I slept on my moms living room floor in her 1 bedroom apartment. "I feel that people will judge me for being a shit person". Who gives a fuck what they think. "I offer nothing, I have no value to give to anyone" Says who? You're a guy, I'm sure you could go die in a war somewhere and provide value! /s. Yes, I'm being facetious. It's from something a politican in… | /r/Divorce_Men | 14/02/24 07:40 PM |
| 10 | Why is it so hard to watch recent ex wife date?"I'm trying to get that under control" Try harder. I don't mean that disrespectfully. But we know how utterly insane it is because you're still in shock and she emotionally moved on probably years and years ago. But that's what this sub is for. To strengthen each other. Your policy is if it's not Completely necessary communication about your children, You don't discuss anything else. Ever. Shit id say ever again. Not about the weather. I'd say not even to be cordial. Not a word. She doesn't dese… | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/02/24 05:35 AM |
| 7 | For those thinking about getting remarried"The shit scum bags say about their husband's in that forum" Bro youre not kidding. I've got a good friend that owns a business and works just with women. She always spills the beans about what these women say about their husband's. And i work with them too when she gets real busy. After awhile they dont care and lose the filter. It opened my eyes more than my divorce in some ways. The amount of women who are using their husbands would shock so many guys. These women know...5, 10 years in advanc… | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/02/24 06:39 PM |
| 21 | Ex is depressed and wants to die 2yrs out from the divorce"Just a 25 year relationship, why isn't he happy go lucky again"? Life isn't a movie, sometimes people lives get nuked and things just don't get better. What do you want to be told? That's its not a big deal? | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/02/24 07:46 PM |
| 3 | 7 month separationWell ultimately it's what's best for you. You want to be single, do that. You want to date this weekend? Do that. But do know you're not alone. We all know how hard it is. There's been millions of guys before that have felt like you do know and became happy again, there will be millions after. For me sadness is amplified if you think your situation is unique. At least I felt that way. It's ok to miss her, just know , the sun will shine again. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/02/24 05:50 PM |
| 4 | 7 month separationI did. I made a terrible mistake in that I waited a year after separation to start dating. Dumbest idea. People told me to do it for some reason. It simply prolonged my grief and delayed the healing process. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/02/24 03:40 PM |
| 4 | 7 month separation7 months is super early still my man. Advice? Wait a year lol. No but seriously. At this stage, it just takes time. We were all there. I was still in shambles at 7 month seperation mark. You'll get there. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/02/24 03:07 PM |
| 7 | How dishonest many of them areWomen: Husband spends 2 hours changing the brakes and oil I sleep Women : Wife spends two hours doing laundry and dishes real shit | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/02/24 06:56 PM |
| 13 | How dishonest many of them areOne study out of Norway found that couples with shared housework had higher divorce rates. Oh, and OP you're gonna love this one. A Harvard study found that couples married after 1975, household chores wasn't a factor at all in divorce. You know what was? A man's employment status. https://www.today.com/health/household-chores-not-reason-why-many-marriages-split-after-all-t101239 | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/02/24 06:45 PM |
| 9 | How dishonest many of them areLesbian marriages have the highest divorce rates. Really blows up the narrative of 'mental load' or 'heavy emotional labor' that women try to pin on guys. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/02/24 06:37 PM |
| 17 | Got back with your ex?It's called being used. She's keeping you on the back burner. I worked with a coworker who was married for 12 years. Said she never loved him and used him. But she still butters him up so he thinks reconciliation is possible. Told me this like we were talking about what to eat for lunch. Your ex is doing the same. How long you let her Is up to you. Some guys go along with it for years. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/02/24 06:34 PM |
| 1 | It's been two weeks since she left.Probably a big reason why lesbian marriages have the highest divorce rates. You get two people in a marriage reliving shit that happened for time immemorial....you're gonna get a lot of break-ups. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/02/24 02:48 AM |
| 1 | It's been two weeks since she left.I'm still in love with her, I want her back Completely normal. I felt the same. To prove to her, that I'm worth it You did say in another comment you asked if this was forever and she said she didn't know. Today is Wednesday. I'd text her tomorrow or give her a call and let her know she can think about it for 5...7 days. (3 weeks is more than enough) You can word it appropriately how you want, but let her know that yes=yes, no=no, I don't know=no, I'm not sure=no, I need more time =no. As far as… | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/02/24 02:45 AM |
| 3 | Dying on the inside looking at my wifes credit card history..."And the specific wife I am dealing with is my problem" Well maybe you're right, or maybe you won't be. But I will say this. I dated a gal... She was a stunner. More beautiful than my ex. Sex was amazing. I broke up with her. Two kids with two dudes. Thanks but I learned my lesson. She not surprisingly easily found a dude to marry her. She now lives in his house with her two kids....and a cousin(I think) of hers . You think her credit union teller salary is paying for those two kids and a cousin… | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/01/24 10:49 PM |
| 6 | What are some signs you saw in the beginning but ignored that later contributed to the reason to your divorceVery true. A man's job situation has a profound effect on chances of divorce at least from one study I read. That same study said a woman's employment status had no effect on divorce rates. | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/01/24 01:21 AM |
| 12 | What are some signs you saw in the beginning but ignored that later contributed to the reason to your divorceI'm kinda thinking her screaming and crying that she hated me and wanted to divorce 3 weeks after our wedding on her period was a decent sign to how things were going to go. 😬 the advice given to me was as a women she was vulnerable and it was a new change and I needed to be supportive. Oops. I tell any guy now when it comes up. The D word comes out you call their bluff right then and there. Apart from that...you've just go to understand that your fiance ( yes yours) considers marriage to you an… | /r/Divorce_Men | 24/01/24 11:38 PM |
| 38 | Too many of the online resources for men's emotional support seem to be red pilled garbageI consider myself quite left wing, especially economically. I'm sure there's crossover between the red-pill and being right wing. But at the end of the day...I'm a pragmatist more than anything. If you're a guy and you lose a job, your chance of divorce increases, but a woman's unemployment status had no effect on divorce rates. If you're wife gets a friend who is divorced your chance of divorce goes up(not even kidding). If you say get hit with a bad bout of depression...your wife could absolut… | /r/Divorce_Men | 18/01/24 05:19 PM |
| 2 | What do you do with yourself?"It was nice but lonely" I've found that certain activities feel less 'lonely". Mainly events where people show up and leave at the same time. Sports, movies, concerts , religious events etc. I've eaten alone and...you feel alone. But I've been to a dozen movies alone and I don't feel that way. I went to a basketball game and it was the same. Granted, it's not like going with a date or 5 of your best friends, but it beats dinner or going to the mall (where for me at least I feel the loneliness i… | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/01/24 07:48 PM |
| 13 | The sad reality I’ve faced: there is zero justice in all of this.Marriage is serious shit. somebody always gets stuck with the bill. Shit sometimes it's the children. But it's too serious of a thing for all parties to get away scott-free. There's a reason people say this "ruined me life" , not "oh, my divorce mildly inconvenienced me". Sometimes things fall apart for the one who left on top but...That's not always the case. My ex played her cards right and used me as a slingshot to a better life. She saw me as a means to an end and...benefited from the marria… | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/01/24 05:38 PM |
| 3 | Delusional Ex-Wife"Why do all-women marriages have the highest divorce rates"? why admit you're wrong when you can just divorce yoink! If you don't think you're doing anything wrong or that you don't need to improve...the relationship becomes untenable. Not a whole lot can be done to resolve conflicts at that point. this is actually a thing in marriage therapy. (Some) women will ask for counseling, and when the marriage therapist tells them they do wrong things too...the women refuse to ever go back. I went down … | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/01/24 12:03 AM |
| 7 | Divorce is devastating but you can come out aheadA mans chance of divorce shoots-up when his wife has a friend(s) that are divorced. Sounds like maybe some of her friends mightve wanted company in misery. And also, I think what OP wrote about what his ex said is telling. But all guys need to think about what she said : 2 decade marriage, reared 2 kids together, both only ever intimate with each other. And she misses....the money he provided. Granted, she was talking to the kids. But what does she mention? $$ Didn't mention they're no longer a … | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/01/24 01:53 AM |
| 7 | She is apologizing for cheating and begging to withdraw from divorce.Isn't being a man great? 🤣 I've heard this life irony also applies with the woman wanting the divorce too. You basically have to let them walk because the more you try and win them back they'll see it as groveling, and you're not a strong independent guy. Geez what a game huh. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/01/24 09:26 PM |
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