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Woman-ThatIAm Archive

View 2 posts and 45 comments by Woman-ThatIAm on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

I didn’t say that these points were negated? I am talking about my personal experience and feelings about how I show admiration for friends, and how I would feel about a partner doing it. I am certainly not giving advice or strategy to anyone else, as I am in no position to. I am bisexual, what if my male partner is also bisexual, would he not like any pictures of any friends? In my experience with partners who were subtly flirting by heart reacting other women’s selfies they weren’t smart enoug…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/20 02:44 PM
2

I like everyone selfies always because I want to be supportive and make everyone feel loved and attractive. I don’t mind when my partner does. It’s when I see him love reacting them, and only doing to a certain aesthetic of female friends that is the problem. Not the male friends. If they are just handing out like to everyone, then I don’t care.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/20 06:22 AM
6

I’m fat, I don’t smell. I wash regularly, use deodorant, have nice lotions, perfume, stay dry. This is just laziness. I have met numerous skinny men who smell horrendous down there. Like I have had one night stands go bad, gone to give them head, and the stench of sneaks had me gag. So, I had to puke and just leave. I think for the most part, it’s a guy thing, not a fat thing, sure there are some overweight people who don’t wash because it’s harder for them. But I know so many fat women who go t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/20 08:00 PM
18

I’m fat, but hell, I don’t smell. People always assume all fat people are smelly, and it’s because of dude’s like this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/20 07:57 PM
6

I started reading and the comments made me roll my eyes. In case anyone reading this wants to know about breastfeeding and alcohol. I have breastfed two children. You can drink alcohol while breastfeeding. As long as you are safe to drive you are safe to breastfeed, so one to two drinks(your tolerance). If you are drunk don’t breastfeed, because then you run the risk of dropping the baby. But the amount of alcohol that passes in to breastmilk is very small. However, you should not smoke cannabis…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/20 07:48 PM
90

One that really upset me was a husband complaining that just the day before his wife had given him amazing sex, but then the next day all she wanted to do was lie by the fire and cuddle, but he couldn’t be bothered to do that so he left and went off to take pictures. Because his idea of a romantic vacation was having sex constantly. Never mind that maybe one of the reasons she had Low libido might be because he wasn’t giving her the non sexual intimacy she needed. It really sickened me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/20 03:05 PM
3

Women stay with cheaters for all sorts of reasons. Women stay with broke cheaters. So I’m not sure it has everything to do with money.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/20 04:21 AM
6

Snapchat has always been a sleazy app. It’s a cheating app, and a nude sending app. It always has been. This is nothing new. I don’t trust men who have snapchat, Kik, whatapp, and the like.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/20 07:47 PM
22

Oh, okay, I understand now, sorry. And you’re right, he’s not funny at all. He’s just a caricature of “angry short man” 🙄 I don’t find it or him funny at all, and his acting is atrocious.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/20 05:49 PM
37

Yes, well, I am not stating I personally find him funny, he’s a comedian and loads of people do find him funny. The point of the title was that I see women say about guys: “he is well off, funny, smart etcetera” but that’s clearly isn’t all it takes to be a HVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/20 04:25 PM
10

My father who I am no contact with, is a trucker. He is married to my stepmom, who he has children with, step children, and my little sister and me from my mother. And who knows how many other children he has never claimed. He once told me and my younger sister he has had sex with at least a thousand women, and I thought it was so unbelievable that he must be lying. As an adult, I don’t doubt it at all. After getting with my step mother he became a truck driver and I am sure it is a convenient m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/20 03:42 PM
14

For me it was sexual trauma, incest molestation at a young age. An emotionally, verbally, physically abusive father. And emotionally abusive mother. I had weird fantasies of being degraded by men at a very young age. I discovered chat rooms and cyber sex very young. Then erotica, and pornography. I became desensitized. I developed a food addiction. Then lost a bunch of weight and started wanting attention from men and validation and I had a sex addiction and alcoholism. I would do very extreme t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/20 05:40 PM
4

I personally do. I’ve had truly huge dicks, but the men were also very skilled with great stamina. However, I have also been with guys with average, or slightly above average and they have been good as well. There have only been a couple men I was with who had below average penises that I enjoyed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/20 04:31 PM
7

Yeah, those three non family male friends sure work out great. Mary supposedly only had two approve, the Father and The Holy Spirit and so gave us The Son. Let us know how that works out for you, Bud. Perhaps he believes in virgin birth but I think Mary didn’t care for stupid male rules either and found a way around them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/20 03:22 PM
29

Yeah, sounds like he has a personality disorder and is incapable of compassion and empathy, but unlike others refuses to even try forcing them or pretending. Get rid of the sociopathic loser.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/20 06:01 PM
21

Ah, yes, very smart. The grammar and spelling is a clear indication of that, Kevin.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/19 01:14 AM
5

1) start to gain steps for becoming independent financially, find a part time job, or work from home. Something I can do to make money. Work on debt. 2) secure resources: financial, legal, housing, friends, family 3) stay in therapy, stay on my medication. 4) not fixate one my “relationship” 5) be the best mom I can be, always. Practice gentle parenting so that my daughter’s never end up like me. 6) take one or two classes 7) actively maintain a few hobbies 8) work in the steps to get free of re…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/19 04:31 PM
12

This is great. “Not just idle chatter” Constant idle chatter will eventually lead to a time when all you have is small talk and monotony.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/19 04:25 PM
26

I am in a long term relationship currently that is failing. One of my complaints has been that he now seeks other people to talk to, he wants conversation from them, his conversations with them are much more interesting than the ones he and I have day to day. We only engage in small talk now. In the beginning we talked every day, texting, Skyping, chatting, gaming together. Then we moved in together and we were always around each other, every where we went we were always together. I unloaded eve…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/19 04:22 PM
8

If I am reading this right, he walked out on them when the girl was three years old, because it said he left ten years ago, and now the girl is 13. Still an asshole, but it appears the girl never would have known him in that case. I wish the mom had taken the ten years he was away to actually tell her the truth. This is incredibly heartbreaking for the child. There was no reason for him to tell a 13 year old what had happened, he is without a doubt a complete and utter POS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/12/19 08:41 PM
-8

But what if that same standard isn’t something you find attractive? I don’t disagree you should just hold your partner to putting in the same effort you do, because of course men should. Rather, I just seek out that body type from the beginning. If a woman likes a certain body type that’s what she likes, as long as it doesn’t go toward fetishization.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/12/19 07:39 PM
35

Even in “open relationships” the male will still be a piece of shit: lie, cheat, deceive. After years of being gaslighted, lied to, and and cheated on, I offered my partner an open relationship. With a few rules; don’t talk to your coworkers, leave on specific woman alone, and don’t try to talk to my friends. Be honest, and upfront. Could he manage that? No. He still had to try and talk to my friends, he couldn’t leave alone his coworkers. He was dishonest and sneaky. Yet, he said he still had h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/12/19 07:05 PM
13

Wow. This is literally my life minus the pregnant boss. :(
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/12/19 06:58 PM
16

I assume he has a “small penis humiliation” fetish and is trying to non consensually get women to engage in his fetish with him. It’s a pretty common tactic by men like this. They literally get off on you insulting them. 🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/12/19 06:23 PM
29

I think what is important is that women should be more vocal about our body standards, and attractions. We should be saying “no, I am not attracted to you” The things you find unattractive, I do. I like tall men, broad shoulders, but with a “dad bod”, I like the softness of a stomach. I love big beards, or scruff. Abs, and skinny just are not for me. I have dated men of all types: short, fat, tall, skinny, muscular, and while I have been able to find some thing about them to be attracted to. Bod…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/12/19 06:13 PM
6

If you aren’t already at least partially attracted to him, you probably never will be. Weight loss can take quite some time. And unfortunately for people who have lost weight maintaining over the years is usually a constant struggle and we will usually go-to, or have weight fluctuations. Is that something you would be able to deal with?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/12/19 04:50 PM
56

Oh, it’s me. I needed to hear this today, I needed to hear it yesterday and every day before that. I am listening now. Thank you for posting this. 🙌🏽
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/19 06:20 PM
1

Thank you so much. I am very glad you got out and that you are doing so well for you and your children, you all deserve it. I know I can too. This is all great advice and I will start looking.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/19 06:18 PM
2

I want to thank everyone for all their responses, they mean so much. Even if some of them hurt my feelings, especially because some of them hurt, I needed them all. I took some time to complete a writing assignment my therapist had given me. It was the first time I had written creatively in years, I used to love writing. It was good, really good. Inside of it was my heart and soul, and I realized that I had smothered those with each relationship I was in while trying to give them to others. Ther…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/19 04:52 PM
3

I think I was so scared of being alone, I just went from one relationship to the next. I spent such a long time along as a child, teenager, young adult, and I was scared to do it again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/19 02:12 PM
3

Thank you for sharing this. I need to know these sorts of experiences. On the surface the relationship is usually okay. It’s just I eventually find out his cheating, or something and then get upset and we have a fight. But I have often wondered what our lives would be like if I had just never seen any of it, if I never knew. Would ignorance be bliss; just pretend he is being faithful and kind. But that isn’t real respect and love, rationally I know that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/19 07:43 PM
4

Adding: I am not so much concerned about dating, exactly. I was more wondering if I should instead just settle for all of this because I realized all of this too little too late, and this is my bed so I must lie in it now? Yes, I worry about being alone and single, but my biggest fear is that because I have no financial independence now that I will ruin my and my children’s lives by leaving. I am constantly afraid that if I leave I will be making life worse for my children, because they will hav…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/19 07:37 PM
7

You are absolutely right; my daughter most definitely are my first priority. Some of my concern has been wondering if I stay in this relationship if it is better for the kids if I just ignore his behavior and just put on a brave face. That’s what I meant by “is it too late”. Essentially, should I just smile and pretend ignorance to what he does so that the kids have a household that stays together?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/19 07:26 PM
9

I think my first immediate goal is to go back to school. It is hard to get a job because finding childcare is very difficult. I was thinking if I went back to school full-time perhaps I could use the excess loans to help with living off of at least temporarily. Allow that to get me a car. One of my most near goals is to get my tax returns: it should be a large amount, and I’m claiming the kids. That should give me a large amount of emergency money.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/19 07:22 PM
9

When we first started dating: I did have a nice job, with great benefits, a checking/savings account, somewhere to live, a car outright payed for. I paid out of pocket to be the one to visit him when he still lived out of state, twice. That should have been my first indication he was a LVM, and those are the red flags I mentioned that I ignored. When we moved in together I gathered all the money for the deposit, utilities, and furniture. Later he convinced me I should quit my job, sell my car, w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/19 07:19 PM
7

I do not need to be, I shouldn’t even want to be as much as I do. It’s very unhealthy. I agree completely. What I have started reading about relationship addicts is that they center themselves around their partner and lose their sense of self essentially, they are no long autonomous. This is also seen in my attachment style because I am so anxious and preoccupied with the relationship and being alone. I don’t have hobbies, interests, friends, outings, or anything any more. The only thing I do is…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/19 07:13 PM
6

You are right I do need to work on boundaries, I have always had a poor sense of them. I recently restarted therapy again last week, I have therapy again tomorrow. Which is actually what prompted me to try leaving him last week, and then work on self help. I am also back on my psychiatric medicine and so that is helping, I believe too. It’s nice that you mention loving myself. My therapist mentioned in our first session that her goal for me is such: while she would like me to like myself, love m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/19 07:10 PM
15

Wow, I cannot like this comment enough. Thank you. These are great steps and self help tools. I had/have isolated myself from friends and family during the length of our relationship and stopped communicating as much. However, I know there are still many people who love and care for me who will be there. I just need to reach out and stop this endless cycle of isolation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/19 07:07 PM
6

You are right, he did not want to. He claims he did/does, but he has showed no indication of that through actions and changed behavior. I need to fix and better myself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/19 07:04 PM
12

You are very right. I know truly, rationally that I need to not focus on that at all. I think why I have been is the love/relationship addiction I have. I never want my children to feel a fraction of this as girls and grow up to be women thinking this is normal. That’s always been something I have told him “how you treat me is how our girls will think it is okay for them to be treated”. But I need to accept accountability that I am teaching them that it is okay to accept this. I isolated myself …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/19 07:04 PM
13

I have for so long not be honest with myself, and even him(by allowing him to continue like this). It is far time for honesty. I am not sure the stress is worth it some days. Then of course when I do leave I start to have a freak out and I start second guessing. I start wondering if I just ignored the infidelity and everything else if it would be okay. I will begin to work on that. My fear has always been he will suspect and then cut me off and I will he screwed. I think I can maintain balance a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/19 07:01 PM
9

I have countless screenshots of his text messages to other women, sexting, exchanging nudes, slandering/pathological lying about me to people. Discord, BattleNet, Snapchat, Instagram, Skype, Facebook Messenger chat logs. I have a friend who will admit that he tried to be inappropriate with her, and be sneaky about it knowing I did not like it. I have screenshots of him admitting to doing all of this to me. It spans about 4 years. I had not thought of a journal, yet, that is a great idea. One of …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/19 06:56 PM
5

Adding: I truly do want better, I want to be loved, and respected. However, I also want my two children to have a comfortable, secure life. How do you balance FDS with children?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/19 06:46 PM
13

Dominating, stretching, violating women. They want to ruin her for the next guy and every guy after. They like to imagine that the actor is them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/19 04:50 PM
8

Yes, seems like love bombing and a touch of ego centric/narcissism. I’d ghost.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/12/19 04:18 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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