Yixagurpuldink Archive

Upvotes	Title	Category	Author	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
34	Q4All: "Snowball effect" with personality and attractiveness	Discussion	Yixagurpuldink	/r/PurplePillDebate	16/12/22 10:36 PM

Upvotes	Comment on	Subreddit	Date (UTC)
6	There is a hypocrisy around overweight women aka “landwhales” It varies depending on who you ask, but it usually is supposed to be "Formerly fit, muscular man who puts on weight/a belly due to the time constraints of having children." Big arms, big chest, has strength, but some gut.	/r/PurplePillDebate	21/06/23 10:11 PM
4	Why do overweight women have such an easy time getting sex, but a very hard time finding a relationship? Will she give them 1) chicken and veggies or 2) doritos and soda? If he's at work all the time and she feeds them into obesity and ill health with shitty eating habits, that essentially wastes all his efforts.	/r/PurplePillDebate	29/03/23 11:55 PM
7	Dating apps have caused the destruction of actual, meaningful love I was told during my University Title IX training (US law relating to SA if not american) at two different universities that any interaction can be considered harassment and it is entirely up to the person approached to decide the intent. Once again, how does my fear exist in my own head? Have you not heard women call men creeps for coming up and saying hi or for talking to them at bus stops or at business events (I have). Have you ever had a friend almost expelled from school because he lived o…	/r/PurplePillDebate	06/12/22 03:12 AM
5	Dating apps have caused the destruction of actual, meaningful love Why do you think that? Have you not seen heard or seen someone have the police called on them or been screamed at or something as simple as a 'hello'? What would your advice be then, "screw it, approach anyway?" FWIW I'm fine with that as an approach provided people realize what could happen.	/r/PurplePillDebate	06/12/22 01:01 AM
5	Dating apps have caused the destruction of actual, meaningful love I never said women are automatically out to get you. Think of the possibilities: on the off chance you say something they don't like or are just not interested, the potential drawbacks (being recorded and it being posted/ having police called/ being pepper sprayed/ having people in your social circle hear and you being mislabeled) vs. the polite "no, not interested" or the RARE chance something good happens means that many people should be wary about doing it. You are correct; most of the time n…	/r/PurplePillDebate	06/12/22 12:53 AM
19	Dating apps have caused the destruction of actual, meaningful love No one does, but the difference between "harassment" and "randomly having a conversation with a friendly/cute stranger" is very thin, and often not determined until after the encounter begins. For fear or not being considered in the first category, don't approach.	/r/PurplePillDebate	05/12/22 08:47 PM
2	Attractive men can't be "creepy" Yes they can. Autistic chads exist. I've seen them. They get away with some shit but no relationship lasts and they usually pull way below their pay grade for long-term. Also, Ezra Miller, Armie Hammer, etc... all model-tier looks with abhorrent personality traits. Most people eventually turned on them and find them creepy. Its their fame and money, not looks, which keep them relevant.	/r/PurplePillDebate	20/11/22 11:01 PM
1	Which celebrity is considered a sex symbol, but you just don't see it? WEEKLY DISCUSSION THREAD 6'3" Rich Funny/ charming Has a touching backstory/ is vulnerable, yet confident Huge peen(reportedly) Juggernaut effect (famous women give stamp of approval = quality	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/11/22 10:41 PM
1	How common is this? "I have an amazing career, make almost 6 figures, have lots of friends and family, fit and physically active, many hobbies and talented, but I can't get a single date" Imagine the gender reverse. You are average or maybe slightly above average (5.5/10). You know you have value, but aren't elite tier. Now, imagine a 7/10+ appearance late 20s lawyer girl with a "name-brand" law degree walks up to you and starts talking to you as if she's interested. Your initial reply is "what? why me?" and assume she's going to pick a better guy the moment he shows up.	/r/PurplePillDebate	16/09/22 05:50 PM
1	You will never be a high value man. Usually the two go hand-in-hand. Research on people's 'type' indicates its a lot of wanting people who understand you, and usually thats in the form of similar beliefs, opinions, lifestyles and aspirations, etc... Thus, your overall 10/10 (important to include overall because usually the appearance-only version is sometimes radically different) is likely such because they have additional traits you value in people and likely she will see the same in you. For general happiness, you also want to s…	/r/PurplePillDebate	29/08/22 11:15 PM
1	You will never be a high value man. The key limitation to your logic here is that everyone's definition of "high value" are different. For some people, "high value" is the C-suite executive with 5000+ underlings, while for others its the guy who gets off his 9-5 and literally everybody wants to be his from and hang out with him. This extends to all sorts of things humans value: art, knowledge, cooking, science, family, etc... Therefore, more than just 10% at the top with all the rewards. Its about being the best at whatever you ch…	/r/PurplePillDebate	29/08/22 10:46 PM
5	Ladies, let's talk about....hair! Yes, because hair loss affects >2/3 of guys and you need to have certain hair textures to really have amazing hair, especially 35+. Broad shoulders can be changed a bit by working out but is also genetic. As soon as you start asking for multiple genetic traits as opposed to a single one, your applicant pool shrinks fast.	/r/PurplePillDebate	19/08/22 02:23 AM
2	Being attracted to average-looking people is settling/having low standards If the 3 star restaurant is 2 km away and the 5 star restaurant is 50 km away and I'm hungry now, I'm picking the 3 star If every time I'm at the 5 star restaurant I pay $100 while at the 3 star I pay $20, I can afford to go to that one and not the other If going to the 5 star restaurant requires me to wear a suit I hate and follow protocols I don't understand (and is mean to me if I don't), while the 3 star restaurant lets me do anything freely, I pick one with more freedom If the 5 star restau…	/r/PurplePillDebate	16/08/22 01:01 PM
3	Why do men choose certain women over others as far as to pursue relationships with? Mostly intangibles related to character: empathy, ability to save and think long-term, self-awareness, willingness to self-improve, goalsetting, etc... Certain people can seem to invest without commitment forever as a backup, for simple companionship, or are doing so hoping something will change and they'll become relationship material.	/r/PurplePillDebate	24/07/22 03:31 PM
1	What trait(s) automatically puts a man above average? Ok I will edit my statement: Amazon software and computing services	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/07/22 10:11 PM
1	What trait(s) automatically puts a man above average? In general, rarely does a single factor alone can make you above average. However, some can in and of themselves carry a person fairly far include but are not limited to: Related to a famous person Ivy League style fancy degree Name brand job (google/boeing/amazon...) $500K+ USD a year in a consistent manner High level achievements (often relevant to a niche) - black belt, Olympian, name brand D1 athlete Savant-level intelligence And once again, these only gets you in the door.	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/07/22 09:49 PM
2	What would you say the best places in the U.S. are for men to find a quality woman? Bigger (not necessarily giant) cities and small, nationally-renowned wealthy suburb enclaves like Ann Arbor, Greenwich, Coral Gables, etc... Big cities have more total populations, more niche markets, more places for you to explore, etc... maximize approaches and give you new areas to go if something happens. However, many big cities are also "glamor cities" which deliberately draw high value people. These are traditionally the high COL areas as you mentioned, where a relative abundance of highe…	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/07/22 07:03 PM
2	Some men need to accept the fact that if they want to date, they’ll have to BB FWIW though with regard to Elon, who is now 50, I;d argue he probably has a lot going for him beyond money: 6'2", decent hair, JBW, Ivy League degree (Wharton), extremely intelligent, confident, well-traveled, well-spoken when needed, put-together, etc... I dont like the guy but there's more to him than just his billions	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/07/22 04:42 PM
9	The average man does not "overestimate" his own attractiveness There is a very clear objective trend in attractiveness. Its just it has some "error bars" based on preferences that are really only significant at the extremes when the population sizes are so small preferences can have a big impact in ordering. Assuming the bell curve, only about 2% of people are above 2 standard deviations of the mean (roughly an 8.3). Most people disagree on 8/9/10 but almost everyone can recognize someone is 7+ or not. That being said, anything statistical is always open …	/r/PurplePillDebate	05/07/22 09:16 PM
3	Do most women acknowledge the fact they have very high standards and that the man they want probably has way less and doesn’t ask for much from a woman? Teacher usually means that they possess lots of people skills, clarity in communication, a specialty in a topic, and a college degree if not also a masters. That checks off a lot of boxes for high value people.	/r/PurplePillDebate	05/07/22 09:02 PM
2	Do most women acknowledge the fact they have very high standards and that the man they want probably has way less and doesn’t ask for much from a woman? I'm also in a high education-required field and he's not lying. Remember that people in those circles value their career a lot and thus judge others similarly. They usually care a lot because 1) your partner needs to understand and value how you spend your time and 2) 'old-money' style social prestige of a high value partner is valued and that is usually not judged simply on looks alone. A 10/10 but airheaded usually is scoffed at. If you can't connect on a fundamental level, it usually doesn't …	/r/PurplePillDebate	05/07/22 09:00 PM
1	Q4W Can you describe/show what “attractive men” look like to you? 6 pack bodies come from men with low body fat percentages. Most people throughout history were fairly lean and I'm sure if they had good genetics from physical labor and the like, I'm sure some had abs. Not the physique model type abs, but visible definition nonetheless has always existed/been in vogue	/r/PurplePillDebate	04/07/22 02:49 AM
2	What is your advice for the underwhelming man? Gainsbourg was also a world-famous musician, a brilliant lyricist, and likely quite wealthy. That's like telling this guy "Jay-Z isn't a 10 but he certainly has done well"	/r/PurplePillDebate	04/07/22 02:03 AM
4	Where are all the good looking people IRL? Remember that height is correlated to ethnicity and that isn't evenly distributed throughout the US. States like Minnesota which ahve mostly northern european/german/english ancestry tend to be taller. States like New Mexico, Texas, etc... which a large latino population tend to be shorter.	/r/PurplePillDebate	03/07/22 02:58 AM
5	Where are all the good looking people IRL? By definition, in any group of people greater than 10, there is temporarily someone in the top 10% for that area. As to the group you are referring to (97%+ percentile): Universities, especially those which are a) very large b) a known "party school" or c) a place with lots of wealthy people and thus take care of themselves such as rich liberal arts or Ivy League. Places where the beauty industry deliberately concentrates such people: Miami, LA, San Diego, Las Vegas, NYC Any place where image ma…	/r/PurplePillDebate	03/07/22 02:51 AM
2	CMV: No one should drop their standards for any reason whatsoever, and high standards are eminently reasonable Nope, as this conversation is exactly the same with regards to gender. And yes, you are free to make fun of anyone who becomes delusional. Think of any average joe who dreams of superstardom in sports or music. You can support them but eventually if they don't confront reality that what they have won't sell, then eventually there is nothing that can be done to help them. And there's more levels of attraction in a relationship than just resent and adore. This reply is basically saying if a 4/10 o…	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/06/22 09:08 PM
2	Is SMV really indicative of a happy and fulfilling relationship? You are right, but major discrepancies in SMV will likely lead to difficulty in relationships. The partner with a higher SMV will have more access to more opportunities and will generally be received more warmly than their spouse, and that can lead to resentment if one or the other feels they are belittled/dragged down/ not respected enough/ etc...	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/06/22 08:39 PM
1	Is it true a "high status" job is required to get a girl to notice you? Those men are also never likely never to commit to them and only date them for the short term fun, and somehow still end up with other high status individuals as previously mentioned. Also, this fails to separate new money and old money. People with old money traditionally got and maintained it through business and smart practices, and thus value education in potential partners	/r/PurplePillDebate	23/06/22 03:27 PM
1	Why are the professions that society is most reliant on also seem to be the least desirable for a man to have from an attraction standpoint? And why does is it seem so important for a man to have a degree? Reasons many view a degree holder as more valuable: 1) The media bias claims that you need to go to university to be successful 2) Not everyone who starts 4-year degree finishes. Bonus points added for graduating from a famous university, and also for graduating with a difficult degree like STEM 3) Statistically speaking, a 4-year degree makes more money in their lifetime than a degree holder 4) The majority of higher-paying fields (law, medicine, STEM, corporate/ MBA) require some kind of degre…	/r/PurplePillDebate	20/06/22 01:04 AM
3	The “ bad boy” stereotype exists because of the halo affect on women Its not just being non-boring. People with steady hobbies and a strong career are not boring but not bad boys. Another key thing about the stereotype is risk taking and preferring short-term fun and thrill over the smarter long-term choice. People lament that they feel a their limited freedom due to career leads them to being ignored and being "punished" for doing the right thing.	/r/PurplePillDebate	15/06/22 02:56 AM
1	The Arrival Of Male Birth Control I think it will provide peace of mind but won't really change much. Female birth control is more important due to the imbalance of responsibility with having children.	/r/PurplePillDebate	15/06/22 01:40 AM
2	Question for PPD. Do you believe dating is hard as men are making it out to be? Primarily the ones on this sub? Why or why not? The difference being that that book is limited by the number of people they meet and very city dependent. Just as an example, assume your "bar-hop" to 10 places nets 150 numbers. There are studies which show attractive men in major cities can get 100+ matches per day on those sites. You have way more people, as well as people who wouldn't go out to clubs/bars but are still potentially interested. You can ping people from literally 50-100 miles away based on your radius who you would likely never…	/r/PurplePillDebate	14/06/22 09:19 PM
1	Question for PPD. Do you believe dating is hard as men are making it out to be? Primarily the ones on this sub? Why or why not? I think there is an element of confirmation bias on this sub. People here usually 1) Have a small non-work social circle, which for many is a source of relationships 2) Socially awkward enough to struggle with cold approaching or any sort of "marketing" to potential partners 3) Cannot simply make and OLD profile and walk away the way some "chads with autism" who fulfill 1 and 2 can do 4) Have somehow found this sub, which means some experience they have had was noteable enough to look for a plac…	/r/PurplePillDebate	14/06/22 08:51 PM
5	Question for PPD. Do you believe dating is hard as men are making it out to be? Primarily the ones on this sub? Why or why not? I would add to your point though that the high-throughput nature of online dating does allow certain people who would be even more successful now than in the past, especially now that people can set things up on social media and let people come to you. Not only is there more awareness, but the gap can grow wider than ever before.	/r/PurplePillDebate	14/06/22 08:44 PM
–	Q4W How do you feel about the ok cupid study? That they would be willing to swipe and/or date to gain access to material gain or temporary companionship. A 3/10 who owns a ferrari will probably pay for your dinner and the like as long as your pay them mind	/r/PurplePillDebate	13/06/22 11:25 PM
3	Women are attractive by default. But they can't do much to improve their given attractiveness, beyond makeup/surgery/clothes. Most men are by default unattractive. But on the flipside, through gargantuan efforts, they can build up their attractiveness through decades of effort, if they don't fail. Men can also grow facial hair to offset certain physical features such as a weak jaw. Men get hair transplants semi-regularly Most men do not need to as status/strength/personality makes up for it in 90%+ of cases As men's appearance gets more important, I could see it become more common	/r/PurplePillDebate	12/06/22 12:31 AM
1	How do you filter f$$k boys, vet guys better for a LTR? Do you actively try to keep a relatively low body count? how? If someone is genuinely interested and there is connection, they are more than willing to play the long(er) game. This might mean lengthening requirements before your initial hookup or by insisting on more non-"flexing" style dates which tend to favor FBoi behavior. Don't play too many games because any person with options will simply leave unless they're sold on you. Also, I'd say raise standards on intangibles, even at the expense of appearance or immediate attraction. For instance, unless the…	/r/PurplePillDebate	07/05/22 11:11 PM
2	What eventually happens to most of the single men on online dating? Find someone IRL or give up. OLD is lookist.	/r/PurplePillDebate	21/04/22 02:24 PM
1	How do you think advanced Sex dolls will affect relationships? I think the you are stopping short of the level these robots will have. They will be capable of emotional closeness and quality comparable to normal people. Slowly but surely, people will be more tolerant of their presence.	/r/PurplePillDebate	09/03/22 10:19 PM
2	Should you cut off all the people you've slept with when you get into a relationship? If your friendship has transcended that and "reverted" to a more platonic form, I think its ok.	/r/PurplePillDebate	18/02/22 04:22 AM
1	What do you genuinely think is the reason men are averse LTRs with women with extensive sexual relationships? My rationales are the following It means they have plenty of people to compare to, which is a source of insecurity. They know grass is greener on the other side in certain ways. This could lead them to wanting something I could never provide but they know they can get. Plus, if I know they are "settling" based on knowledge of their past(especially if they ever say something like that themselves), then I'm always on guard that I will never be able to rest as they might leave to move up the SMV la…	/r/PurplePillDebate	14/02/22 05:41 PM
6	What do you believe is holding you back from a successful relationship? I am a PhD student at a top 10 global university. I'm surrounded by high value women, but they are very career focused plus is it considered unprofessional to search at work. Plus, Title IX (which I believe is needed 110%) is on high alert and thus daygame is very risky. I spend a lot of time at work and cant really afford to "put myself out there" in any major way. I'm in a small town so I am not close to a large dating pool with people with low enough standards. I have autism and suffer from a…	/r/PurplePillDebate	14/02/22 04:20 AM
1	CMV: Too many men view women as a right and not privilege, and that’s a huge problem. It can be easy to miss, especially if you aren't social in the "just hanging out" sense, or if you focus on things like grades or sports where there is an objective goal and that's all that matters with regards to that goal. Also, if you surround yourself with one gender by virtue of what you do these effects can sometimes be muted.	/r/PurplePillDebate	11/02/22 12:06 AM
2	Why Do You Think Most Men Instinctively Care About N Count? Part of it is societal teaching, part of it is something in my lizard brain which says "if she sleeps around a lot, is she 1) committed for the long term and 2) if she gets pregnant is the child actually mine?"	/r/PurplePillDebate	10/02/22 04:17 AM
2	[CMV]Women who don't have LOOKS are low value I would not want to be a pathologically lying, military wannabe, skill less, triple heart attack, drugged out, widely panned platinum-spoon-in-mouth like Dan. I'd be Bill gates anyday.	/r/PurplePillDebate	09/02/22 12:34 AM
2	us men should not fear going the extra mile when pursuing unattractive good women. I hate to cut terms but if you are willing to go the extra mile, its because there's something that's attractive in some sense, maybe not just visual. I think everyone can agree upon that. Remember though that if you aren't physically attracted it makes it hard to enjoy being around the person, at least when young.	/r/PurplePillDebate	07/02/22 11:11 PM
1	Both the Redpill and FDS seem to be primarily Low Socioeconomic Status inidividuals Most of the primary and secondary school teachers I had growing up (Texas, US) were conservative, some of them legit creationist-level conservatives. It depends on where you live.	/r/PurplePillDebate	07/02/22 09:49 PM
1	Woman's standards are to high - or perhaps men are just generally worse today? Both up and down. Social media distorts expectations, and people are more quickly willing to abandon potentially "good" partners for a "great" one. Moreover, more people are vetted through online dating on face/ body that wouldn't be if things were more in-person Moreover, women can now acquire way more on their own than even 1-1.5 generations ago. Now, a hardworking, successful woman has legs to stand on in demanding the same in their partners (and vice versa). To the degree that looks and inte…	/r/PurplePillDebate	06/02/22 05:48 AM
1	Opinions discussed here are all about man/woman binary with perceived differences. How do you reconcile that with non-binary, trans, and gener fluid individuals? I think most people here know the "Pills" debate is highly reductionist and meant to encapsulate large groups of people- everyone knows exceptions to the rule. Moreover, it happens to be focused on (cis)het relationships. Considering LGBT, I think LG have their own well developed communities and dynamics wherein those ideas are discussed. Bisexuals (to a first approximation) experience basically typical results in whatever dating market they are in plus some stigma. In a similar, but with much m…	/r/PurplePillDebate	05/02/22 10:08 PM
0	Gut check: how do we, as a community, feel about staying friends with your exes? Very dependent on the nature of hte relationship. Work colleague turned friend turned SO? I can see that returning to friends in the name of professionalism, especially if you dated because you were friends and wanted to see where it went. Basically, if we can find hard boundaries of mutual ground, things turn out well. Fling turned dating partner after long, messy relationship? Best to break it up	/r/PurplePillDebate	04/02/22 04:19 AM
16	Average men wanting chad’s lifestyle are akin to middle class people wanting a billionaire lifestyle As a radical introvert, I crave it until I think about it and then the social aspect scares me, so I have to disagree with you there.	/r/PurplePillDebate	01/02/22 02:13 PM
33	Average men wanting chad’s lifestyle are akin to middle class people wanting a billionaire lifestyle At least you are a landowner, better than most of us. I'm sure its tough but thats pretty cool	/r/PurplePillDebate	01/02/22 02:13 PM
1	Height increasing shoes morally deceptive or nah? Yes, it is hypocritical but many social standards are. Its just which battles you choose.	/r/PurplePillDebate	01/02/22 04:02 AM
0	Height increasing shoes morally deceptive or nah? Its like makeup, push-up bra, etc... in that it masks true beauty with extra stuff. However, given those things are conventionally accepted, while faking your height is not nearly as much and can be considered very petty. Many attractive men are 5'7-9" and many women don't care about height the way men think they do. I know if somebody I was close to faked their height by 4 inches, I'd make fun of them for it	/r/PurplePillDebate	29/01/22 03:29 AM
6	Q4Men who have sex, please share your story of successful IRL approaches Your activities seemed like they came from a place where such activities like paddleboarding and paragliding and nature-stuff are possible. It matters because certain locations attraction certain people.	/r/PurplePillDebate	29/01/22 03:20 AM
3	Do women value a guy’s status or overall looks more? College professors almost always require advanced degrees. They are traditionally disciplined and well-spoken. Being a college professor at a major school (D1s + designer brand schools) is bascially like becoming a professional athlete. 1000s of hyper-intelligent, dedicated people live their whole young adult life to get one of a handful of spots. Most of them come from famous school pedigrees too. Also, most professors make 80K+, 1/200K+ at famous schools. Did I mention tenure = guaranteed job?	/r/PurplePillDebate	28/01/22 05:21 AM
1	Why "just be yourself" is the best dating advice There are multiple key caveats that need to be said about this (applies to both M/F): Just because you like the "current you" doesn't mean there is a "better you" out there that you will like just as much. That better you will be objectively more attractive to more people While you should never change yourself to do things you hate only because it impresses people, certain traits (e.g. "I like farting out loud") are not acceptable and "being you" will hurt you. Certain things need to be done bec…	/r/PurplePillDebate	27/01/22 07:13 PM
1	Self-improvement "for yourself" There are things I WANT to be that can't be taken away from me. Things like a good physique, lifting goals, martial arts skills, etc... which obviously have a social benefit to them but at the end are me to claim I could.	/r/PurplePillDebate	04/01/22 04:31 AM
1	How do most people just not have to self improve to not get a date? You are right. Most people, as is, if they deliberately put themselves out in public, would eventually find someone. Two key ideas here: 1) goals and standards and 2) Friend size I focused a lot on studies (and went to all boys HS) so my social circle, especially with women, was quite small. I then went to a stem field at an elite university where the lab I started in was 85% men and the major was 70% men and many remaining ones had previous relationships or were career-oriented. That left me wi…	/r/PurplePillDebate	04/01/22 04:15 AM
2	Women only please: Would you stay with a guy who never wanted to get married? With marriage, there's a psychological trick, a sense of "no going back", especially if children are involved. If your real fear is that you will end up financially devastated by divorce as a guy and are not in a situation to worry about that, you will sound like a whiner and someone who has their foot on the way out. If you are carrying ~100% of the financial load, then you and your GF know your position and should have a pre-nup ready as a must do.	/r/PurplePillDebate	04/01/22 04:00 AM