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YouGetWhatYouClaim Archive

View 8 posts and 21 comments by YouGetWhatYouClaim on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

That's a great line thanks, stealing that. That being said, I don't think she is determined to actually follow through with this really. We haven't seen eachother since, I fully expect her to succumb to my charm if we meet again after a week of no sex. I don't bargain or convince for sex, attraction can not be negotiated anyway. But I will keep it in mind if for some reason she keeps it up and feels the need to make a real thing out of this.
/r/askTRP14/06/16 03:36 PM
1

Like the playful approach. Shows you're not affected. Don't take it seriously right away like you're butthurt, but get more serious and put her in her place if she actually persists.
/r/askTRP14/06/16 03:28 PM
3

Good point, yes it did actually. I've been vetting her thoroughly but subtly from the start, withholding commitment and any judgement while just assuming the worst. There are some other red flags, and she has been very honest with me even though what she told me put her at risk for being demoted (don't think she realized that). There are some major green flags too though. Very low N-count (under five), and her actions and behavior match that: she bonds well, is interested and invests, her friend…
/r/askTRP14/06/16 03:08 PM
1

Yeah I did that instinctively, she suggested I emigrate to where she lives, all hurt and offended. She is sweet, but she's lucky I'm patient.
/r/askTRP14/06/16 02:23 PM
1

Though we are in an exclusive arrangement for the moment, she believes I have no problems walking away and being free. I arranged for it to be this way from the start. She actually tried to talk me into more of a scarcity mindset because that's her own worldview and would give her comfort which I'm not allowing.
/r/askTRP14/06/16 02:20 PM
1

I like the withholding of validation in reaction to unwanted behavior. Then affirm when she falls back in line. I doubt it will come this far really though, she wants it too much to seriously make a big deal out of this and she has little leverage anyway.
/r/askTRP14/06/16 02:16 PM
1

Probably a bit too harsh of a reaction in this situation. But a good way to discourage future shit tests from plates, I'll keep it in mind.
/r/askTRP14/06/16 02:10 PM
2

Thank you! I was using her words (insulting her body). But you're right that I should refrain from defending myself and acknowledging her take on the situation, good point. I like the concepts of letting actions do the talking, and rewarding good behavior with attention and undesirable behavior by the lack thereof. She openly worries sometimes that I could walk away at a minutes' notice if I want something else, so that feeds into her insecurity and willingness to please me. I've given this too …
/r/askTRP14/06/16 12:17 PM
2

By the way I'm pretty sure we'll end up having a lot of sex again soon anyway, but I'd like to ace this shit test. That's probably what this is right?
/r/askTRP14/06/16 11:41 AM
1

Plot twist: from a facebook check it appears she has a wimpy long-time boyfriend that is travelling abroad at the moment. She did not explicitly tell me this, but I was first alerted to this possibility when she spoke about him and 'them' in the present tense the morning after we hooked up.
/r/askTRP21/03/16 12:57 PM
1

Power in the sense that she could be playing me in order to undermine/test my self-esteem, get validation and justify her hooking up with me by proving me to be interested in 'dating' her retroactively, without actually having tingles for me.
/r/askTRP21/03/16 12:52 PM
1

Yes I probably should have been more clear about the starting time of the date, and that I was annoyed (but not butthurt or disappointed) at her flaking because I value my time.
/r/askTRP21/03/16 12:50 PM
1

She gets one more chance. I have no plates, I can use the experience escalating and she's hot, if she tries to deny sex or flakes again she is nexted.
/r/askTRP21/03/16 12:47 PM
1

I have a seriously negative image of myself and my life and career in general. I have been surviving instead of living. Being dependent on approval by others and women in particular for self-esteem is not a sustainable way of living. It's like being on drugs and they are the dealers. I think this is my final wake-up call. I'm going to rehab. However, I feel my neuroticism is keeping me from making convincing choices, and self-actualizing like that. I lost my inner compass surviving and pleasing …
/r/askTRP04/02/16 03:25 PM
1

Thanks! I have been interested in getting into Stoicism. I have some reading to do. And actually internalizing.
/r/askTRP04/02/16 03:16 PM
1

I am unexperienced RP, still unplugging apparently. I knew this relationship was a trainwreck as I was in it. I saw RP mechanisms work, I observed and learned, but I couldn't get myself to stand my ground and do something about it. You're right I chose the beta way there, because of my feelings and fears. And I was not happy about it, even though the relationship was not extremely bad. We did spend a lot of time together and had fun. The fears came mostly from you guys. RP is very cynical, I hav…
/r/askTRP04/02/16 03:10 PM
3

Wow thorough reply, thank you. This post is partly reflective. I knew this relationship was a trainwreck as I was in it. You're absolutely right about that I should make myself the mental point of origin. I should have kept doing that while being with her. I bond too easily with girls, get oneitis instantly and then can't stand the idea of them being with someone else. Frustrating. She was really trying to be with me specifically at first, while I had multiple options. You're right about my acti…
/r/askTRP04/02/16 02:54 PM
2

Much thanks dudes. Excellent, nuanced advice, although it hurts to hear. The truth is that the relationship had a expiry date anyway because I'm leaving the country in a couple of weeks. However, I did not want things to end this way. Thanks for setting me straight. I really lost it along the way, from the first week on I became more uncertain and beta-behaving, mate-guarding. Total loss of frame and independence. Self-fulfilling prophecy. Met up with her last night when she invited me over afte…
/r/askTRP01/12/15 05:47 PM
2

Wow, this rings true. I was guiding myself towards the friendzone. The only way to avoid that is to be bold, be escalating and be clear about your one goal (steaming sex, not being a friend or attention-slut). I feel I need more success to get a consistent abundance-mentality going but things are looking up for me thanks to RP. Thank you both for setting me straight. I did a version of what you proposed (had drinks with her and a group of friends in town), and we're back on: we escalate again to…
/r/askTRP02/09/15 05:52 AM
2

Thanks for the advice, it rings true. You are doing well by recognizing your mistakes. Think about specific things you would've done differently in the various situations that happened throughout the night. E.g. exactly how would you have escalated during the event? on the way back home? at your house? in your bedroom? I have been doing just that. I have a real problem presenting myself as a sexual individual for some reason and having fun banter with more stoic girls, like this one. You're neve…
/r/askTRP21/06/15 05:35 PM
3

Well said mate, the nail on the head. Thanks! I did read everything in the sidebar (and I am so grateful for the insight that it has given me) but there's a difference between knowing and really internalizing and making it a part of your personality. It's not easy to go against years and years of blue pill conditioning even though you know you should. But it will be done. I have some reading and practising to do!
/r/askTRP21/06/15 05:24 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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